#its easy to forget that i like have a Disorder and that most ppl do not have daily panic attacks when they're nervous abt things

[bibleofficial]

i’m myself at home, me in public, & i runs it all

[vamptastic]

woke up at 5pm stummy hurts head hurts i have to take 5 medications and do the goddamn dishes. life is hell. nevertheless i stay chill and relaxed. due to the medications.

[foggybrainedloser]

ADHD things that have fucked with me over the years

the idea i have and cant get rid of that my brain can run out of room and that i have to focus more on schoolwork than learning abt hobbies bc if i take up too much “room” on hobbies then i wont have “room” for school

getting an amazing, SHOWSTOPPING idea that ive never thought of before and going to write it down then instantly forgetting

being told that “everyones a LITTLE adhd ✨🥰” therefore watering down the struggles adhd people have to go through daily and making me feel like my feelings arent valid

feeling like a foggy brained loser (x3)(that was a ref to my username lol)

feeling bad and hating myself for being physically incapable of paying attention to a conversation or someone speaking bc my brain decides its Not Relevant

having everyone tell me im not REALLY disabled bc their dad has adhd and hes fine!! as if its not a spectrum and is also affected by other mental illnesses

being told repeatedly im too loud and making me feel like its better if i just dont speak

rejection sensitive dysphoria is a fuck up bc ion wanna sound manipulative by telling people that them criticizing me or telling me something i did was bad made me wanna kms but it DID i cant HELP IT

tics and stims being told to society that theyre only an autism thing when they are very much not just an autism thing!! adhd people and autistic people most commonly stim, and adhd people can get tics! (u can also tic or stim if u have other disorders, do research on ur disorder n ticcing/stimming if ur interested in dat)

oooh the CONSTANT people telling me how annoying my tics and stims are when it hurts to stop. like i get it if its bothering u but dont be mean “ur pen clicking is SO ANNOYING” yea its annoying me too leila i cant help it

having ppl use the r slur against u ur whole life then having ppl try to tell u ur not allowed to say it bc ur not rlly disabled x3

how hard it is to get proper treatment and medication and an IEP because of how many people pretend to have adhd to cheat on tests and get adderall and ritalin bc its “easy to fake”

feel free to add more

[lani-43]

Here is my essay on why all of ur points r wrong

1) Who are you talking about? Everyone who has ever self diagnosed? I think not. Of course there are people who do that (mostly young people) but most mature people who self dx are not like that. Believe it or not but a lot of people do not want to have a mental illness and they are tell themselves that they r faking stuff for attention even though they aren't. “they are putting themselves on the same level as actually disabled people“ Are you aware that people have a mental illness before they get diagnosed or do you chose to forget about that? There are many actually mentally ill people who first self diagnosed themselves and later got a confirmation from the doctor, so of course they should b on the same level as other non-neutotypical people

2) Who has said that??? Even if someone said that does that make them speak for every self dx person ever? Do you know that not everyone uses tumblr? Are you implying that self dx get their information from tumblr and not actual scientific sources? Amazing how little time you spent looking into it. You could almost say that you did all your research on edgy tumblr posts

3) I dont live in the U.S no fucking idea but im pretty sure that if a lot of people say that they cant do it for whatever reason they they cant do it

4) See point 2 and 3

A lot of people self dx because it makes them feel more comfortable and less stressed about ssomething being wrong with them. Finding a community of similar people with issues gives a supporting feeling

5)

Yes there are always attention craving ppl in every community and this is an easy thibg to get someones attention with so it was bounf to happen. So whats your point except thaf u r generalizing a whiole group of ppl again

6) what cute symptoms exist? Again self dx people are not the reason for a small minority of people who think disorders r edgy or romantic and are posting pastel pictures w something related. Look into communitied before you talk about them

7) you think making a huge amount of research on a topic over months isnt work?

Ianyways its midnught goodnight

Why I hate self-diagnosers:

They will distort their experiences and use confirmation bias to put themselves on the same level as people who are actually disabled/non-neurotypical

They act like they’re smarter than people who have studied the same thing for long enough to become doctors because Tumblr says so (or they think that their feelings and their teenage angst mean more than a degree for some reason.)

They use the excuse that they “can’t get to a doctor” when 90% of these people live in the United States and there are free clinics around. If you're really concerned about your health you will find a way to get to a medical professional, but this leads me to my next point:

They think they know more than doctors, right? So they don’t trust a diagnosis, so why are they pretending to have a disorder? To get medicine or treatment from people they think are stupider than themselves? These people are literally saying they want a disorder so they can avoid getting treatment based on whatever merit (OMG THE DOCTOR IS NEUROTYPICAL AND WHITE UGGHHH.) The only thing a disorder gives you is struggle, which means

Self-diagnosers are more often than not out for attention/pity/brownie points/oppression olympics points from the Internet so they don’t have to be responsible for all the horrible in the world that they attribute to the even-moderately-privileged-people.

They are literally taking a disorder and making it a cute little doo-dad they can slip on and off to fit in, meanwhile people like MEhave had to live with our disorders our entire lives and all the shit it entails (which, yes, is the ugly symptoms as well as the “cute” and “quirky” ones.)

You people are obnoxious and you’re making me and my ilk look STUPID. I’m high-functioning and I don’t want people to see me after YEARS OF HARD WORK AND PROGRESS and think I’m one of you goddamn snowflakes just trying to be special. >:c

[maghrebim]

having ptsd more like

i dont remember the last time i had a good nights sleep

time to panic

unbridled rage

flinching

Cant Trust Anyone

DONT TOUCH ME !!!!!1!

whats real where am i what year is it

3 months just passed and i remember none of it

alternatively: only 1 week has passed but it feels like approximately 9 years oh god when will my painful existence end

everything is a coping mechanism

quietly & discreetly leaving to another room when something feels Off so u can quietly & discreetly panic in peace and also minimize the risk of being lashed out on even though you left your abusive home situation years ago just bc its such an ingrained act to you

numb

“i have nightmares every night” “oh thats ok we all have bad dreams sometimes :)” “thats not what i fucking mean susan”

“are you ok?” “yeah”

alternatively: “are you ok?” “[standoffish look, complete silence]”

stop feelin like a human person and more like a cornered animal

[literally any noise occurs] [immediate breakdown]

simultaneously feeling way older than you are bc you were forced to grow up super fast and feeling like a little kid bc youre emotionally stunted

drugs and/or alcohol being the only way to feel/not feel things anymore and u know fuck all about "coping” in a “healthy manner”

FLINCHING

literally anyone: [expresses positive emotions towards you]

you: what the fuck

also being perpetually kind of uncomfortable with positive emotions, relationships, and communication in general because you didnt have that growing up lmao

oh and using “lol” and “lmao” to sprinkle some humour on sad honest truths about yourself

stop being nice to me ???????????

Cannot function

being too embarrassed to use words like “flashbacks” and “trigger” to describe your own damn experiences

nothingness

Everything happens so much

having literally no regard for your own life or wellbeing

getting downright offended sometimes when others expresses concern for your life or wellbeing

inability to connect w other human beings on any level lol

acquiring ptsd from an environment that stole ur sense of humanity + personhood + autonomy from you so now youre just like I Dont Feel Like A Person And People Think They Know What I Mean But They Really Dont

angry about nothing

angry about everything

defensive about the most redundant shit

was that nightmare a memory or did my brain make it up

shutting ppl out

forgetting™

someone raised their voice so im going to die

chronic repression (bonus points: having the shit you repress resurface months/years later when youre eating dinner or s/t and having a complete meltdown out of nowhere]

reckless impulsiveness/paralyzing reluctance binary. nothing in between fuck yuo

Im Going To Turn Out Exactly Like My Abuser(s)

isolating urself and accidentally not talking to anyone for like half a year

not being downright suicidal bc you dont want to DIE you just want everything to uh fucking stop ? please?

BEING suicidal but not having the space to talk about it out of fear of forced hospitalization

technically havin the space to talk about it but not wanting to hear cliches like “but youre so strong! youll get through it! itll get better!” or condescending ass remarks like “thats the easy way out of your problems/only cowards commit suicide/wow thats so selfish what about the people who care about you?”

if i reenact my trauma enough maybe itll help, somehow,

wantin to talk about things but how the fuck

anyone: itll be ok you:

hypervigilance wearin you out so u exhausted all the time but u cant rest because, yknow, hypervigilance

“its my fault” “what is?” “it!!!”

so restless cant sit still or relax for even 1 second

please dont let me be alone with my thoughts

I Dont Have A Single Interest Or Hobby And Nothing Brings Me Joy

feeling so detached from everyone else u start to question if u even exist in the same world as them

ppl being hurt when youre suddenly jumpy and paranoid and cant let ur guard down around them and you dont know how to explain that, no, its not them, youre just like this sometimes, its cool,

GUILT

and, of course, symptoms that may allude to other FUN(!) mental disorders including but not limited to:

losing touch w reality

seeing shit

hearing shit

is the door locked better check 5000 times

if i dont do this exact thing in this exact way im gonna lose my shit entirely

who am i

i havent eaten in 3 days bc i dont deserve nourishment/i hate myself/i literally cant remember to take care of myself/gotta restrict those nasty calories/have to punish myself SOMEHOW/etc etc

alternatively: throwing up

complete and utter lack of focus

[not getting out of bed/showering/going to school or work for days/weeks] “this is fine”

mania

what the fuck is a “””future”””???

blacking out entirely

generally just bein the actual personification of the fight or flight response