#its called i love jake and my back hurts gjnfkdjgndsg

[totallyboss-a]

hi i jst watched jake for the whole boot here’s my List

jake is always on his fucking phone!!! hes on his phone in the bus and in the hallway when hes walking by christine. ON THE BUS its really significant bc hes CALLING like nobody calls anyone anymore unless its for business or serious gossip and im willing to bet it was the former :/

still hung up on chloe you can see it he’s looking at her when he walks past the locker while shes telling brooke abt him and madeline plus he loves it when people talk abt him

his stupid laugh after rich calls him jakey d !!!! oh my god

he jst rests his hand on rich’s shoulder like bro... just wait til i tell you... everyone knows but i totally banged her

HIS HANDSHAKE W RICH MAKES ME FEEL VALIDATED AND ALIVE

HE HEARS NOISE AND IMMEDIATELY GOES RUNNING ITS LIKE RICH YELLING IS HIS SUMMONING CALL OR SMTH

HE DOES THE FUCKING SIGN W HIS FINGERS YOU KNOW THE ONE W THE FFUKCING. MIMING FUCKING W UR FINGERS

he laughs sO UPROARIOUSLY LOUDLY AT THE PART WHEN RICH CALLS JEREMY GAY I HATE HIMMM

hes always handshaking w rich hes so dumb

listen i dont care what any of you say jake rubs his face at the c-c-c-c’mon ending of the song and its his exhaustion hes fucking EXHAUSTED AND THIS IS CANON AND FUCK ALL OF YOU

LETS START THE PARTY!!! its canon he just announces himself when he enters the room by yelling also hes a party animal who wouldve known!!!

takes off his jacket and i GUARANTEE you MONEY that its to impress christine he doesnt stop lookin @ her through the whole rehearsal and back at his phone. put ur fucking phone away

IM WRITING A WHOLE SEPERATE HEADCANON FOR JAKE AND MR. REYES WHEN HE BRINGS UP THE HOBBY LOBBY AND Y’ALL ARE GONNA KILL ME FOR IT

okay so basically the fingergun thing that he does w mr reyes suggests a familiarity and anyway can y’all imagine jake meeting mr reyes when he starts working in hobby lobby and hes like. oh shit!!! and gets to know mr reyes which is why hes like, not getting in trouble for being on his phone in class... mr reyes Favours Him bc hes a popular kid and also they know each other outside of the classroom!!!! bc jake WORKS/WORKED at hobby lobby

jst turns around in the MIDDLE of mr reyes talking to talk to rich and brooke and i guarantee u its smth stupid like “what one is a midsummer night’s dream??? :/”

HIS FISTPUMP FOR THE FRISBEE GOLF TEAM!!! SHUT UP JAKE YOU ARE SO STUPID I CANT BELIEVE HE PLAYS FRISBEE GOLF

literally EVERYONE is paying attention to mr reyes except jake which means theres obviously something important on the phone he looks rly observed how much do u wanna bet its sm to do w work

REACHES OUT TO GET RICH’S ATTENTION WHEN RICH IS LOOKING RIGHT AT HIM

this scene is so important its so easy to tell hes nervous and literally dying and this is obvious bc he talks w his hands a lot already right see: “aw man i shouldnt say!!!” but like. this is a WHOLE new level he fucking FINGERGUNS christine and keeps rubbing his hands together its 10/10 a nervous thing he does bc he likes this girl!! he wants to talk to her!!! oh my god!! HE GETS SO EXCITED WHEN SHES LIKE ACTUALLY TALKING TO HIM LIKE “YEAH!!! YOU WERE THE GIRL THAT DIED!!! Y E A H !!!!!” hes so laughy and oh my god

you were.... *nodnodnod* .....good. who the fuck says hes smooth. theyre a liar. THEYRE A LIAR

I fucking HATE THIS PART okay he’s like... his voice gets all quiet and hes looking at christine and hes being GENUINE and OPEN and VULNERABLE with her like who the fuck tells someone on the FIRST time they meet someone “all the pressure i feel to be the best and everything all the time” like WHO DOES THAT!!! SOMEONE WHOSE HEAD OVER HEELS AND ALSO AN IDIOT.

he IMMEDIATELY brushes aside that he just like,, opened up to her to talk abt HER like jake oh my GOD honey you need like, therapy. please. im so tired he deserves the world

HES SO AWKWARD HE CALLS IT A VICTORY DANCE AND ITS BC HE LIKELY DOES STUPID VICTORY DANCES AT THE END OF MATCHES AND HE JUST FORGOT THE WORD BOW BC HES LIKE “oh!!! RIGHT.”

HE TRIES TO DO THE WHOLE PICKUP LINE THING. “I’M GLAD THAT GIRLS NOT DEAD BEFORE I GOT THE CHANCE TO KNOW HER” AND IMMEDIATELY KNOWS ITS THE STUPIDEST THING HES EVER SAID IN HIS LIFE

him already backing off bc he feels like hes ruined his chance :’) jake dillinger has insecurities w saying the right thing :’)

he does like. casual fingerguns when hes nervous its facts

HE TAKES CHRISTINES HAND LIKE HES TRYING TO BE SMOOTHA ND FORGETS THE FUCKING. LINE. HAS TO PLAY IT OFF W “whatever” INSIDE HES LIKE OH MY GOD SHE THNKS IM A TOTAL DUMBASS

HE GENUINELY GIVES CHRISTINE A THUMBS UP. A THUMBS UP. ITS LITERALLY HIM JUST DYING

jake and rich being even remotely involved in two player game makes their friendship so important to me :’) theyre bros. i dont care tht theyve only known each other a year!!!! THEYRE BROS AND ITS JST FACTS

okay im LAUGHING at jenna taking a picture of jake and christine to fuel chloes Seething Ex Gf Rage but like,, oh my god hes so awkward hes like !!! OH!! YEAH!! I LIED I JST WANTED TO HANG OUT W YOU ALONE

FISTPUMP FOR SBARROS!!! FUCK YES HIS FAVOURITE PLACE IN THE UNIVERSE

i hate this part hes like “you’re kinda hard to notice” and JUST MOVES ON IMMEDIATELY DIE DIE DIE

HE THINKS THAT SBARROS IS SO COOL THEY LET YOU PICK ***WHATEVER YOU WAAAAANT***

THERES SOMETHING I NEED TO TELL YOU “N OW?” this is the first time hes been smooth w christine and jeremys ruining it :/ (im joking i love jeremy jfndkgd)

JAKE LITERALLY TAKES A PICTURE OF JEREMY ON THE FLOOR IM SO MAD I HATE HIM

his stupid hero complex he pulls christine away like OH my god

okay at first i thought it was a cross that he formed w his hands but HES ACTUALLY PULLED A BOXING STANCE?? LIKE HES READY TO DECK JEREMY IF HE COMES @ HIM OR CHRISTINE OH MY GOD JAKE. PUT YOUR FISTS DOWN