#its about to get pretty sexy in the next chapter if I do say so myself

[yoonieper]

For the Birds— Part 4 | JJK

I want you to stay even though you don’t want me.

♡ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader (feat. Yuri) 

♡ Genre: angst, smut, future fluff!

♡ Rated: R for Regret

♡ Series Warnings: Lots of smut (not always healthy), cheating, discussions of depression, this series includes Jk in a pretty toxic environment, degradation (not the sexy kind), manipulation, and overall Jk being in an emotionally abusive situation!

♡ Chapter Warnings: panic attack, lots of bad self-deprecating thoughts, repressed Jungkook makes an appearance once again, masturbation (m + f), use protection (!!!), public sex, oral (m + f receiving), koo is a bj virgin, fingering, unprotected sex (be smart!)

♡ Word Count: 37.9k

♡ Summary: As the son of the CEO at Golden Tech, a marriage was arranged in the name of business. Jungkook really tried to make the most of his situation and be the best husband he could be, but no matter how much he tried, his wife just doesn’t seem to want him. Then you… you came into his life and his eyes couldn’t help but wander.

♡ Now Playing: Liquor by Chris Brown— see masterlist for playlist! 

♡ Betas: Thank you so much to @illyrian-book-lover and @mellowladyanchor for reading this part for me! If you’re interested in betaing a future part, dm me! If you're interested in becoming a permanent beta for this series please first click here and refer to 'details about the job' section for more details and dm for any questions you might have! Betas get early access to chapters, so if you're free to help out and can't wait for next chapter, consider joining the team!!!

♡ Author’s Note: I started this thinking it was going to be one of the shortest chapters but 😀 Hehehehehe anyway, get cozy, get some snacks, maybe something nice and warm to drink as well, and enjoy my friends!

No reposting, modifying. Translating is not allowed unless given explicit permission. Thank you so much : D

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It was still too early for him; the sun was barely peeking over the skyline. Businesses were just beginning to flip their signs to open, the sounds of the city were growing louder by the minute— only a soft murmur in the restful city background, and daily menus were just now beginning to be set outside for the few passersby who were walking the streets this early morning. 

It was in these initial hours on the first day of November that Min Yoongi arrived at his office. He had an iced Americano firmly grasped in his hand despite the chilly temperature outside. He always preferred the drink in its cooler state, no matter the weather, to quickly wake him up in the morning. It worked enough to get him here, but never as much as he needed it to.

He yawned as the elevator slowly rode up to the floor his office resided on. He still had a few hours before his first appointment, but Yoongi always came early to do menial tasks like office bills or general prep work for appointments. He didn’t have too much to do today, but some important documents he’d been putting off were calling his name.

His eyes lazily drifted over to Secretary Kim’s desk, as they always did, ready to say a brisk “good morning” before heading into his office until the time neared his first appointment.  

Yoongi was so out of it this morning. He and Heran were up all night with their little Bora. They both figured more of her baby teeth were coming in and that’s what’s been making their daughter so fussy these days. Heran especially had been a little worried after their third all-nighter, but Yoongi was quick to notice the little bumps in her gums upon further inspection, indicating she was likely just teething. It had been a rough few nights, last night especially, but eventually he was able to get her to fall asleep in his arms after he let his wife go back to bed.  

He languidly glanced over at Secretary Kim ready to wave, but her wide eyes quickly caught his attention as she discreetly pointed toward the waiting area. He wasn’t expecting anyone this early but lo and behold was the man he hadn’t seen in seven months.

His big, round eyes were instantly recognizable as they stared up at him when he noticed Yoongi standing there. This was certainly unexpected. He definitely didn’t have Jeon Jungkook booked today.

“Mr. Jeon! What a surprise!” Yoongi smiled as he walked over to him. 

Jungkook stood up, and Yoongi took particular interest in the way he shakily shifted his weight from one side to the other. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days and Yoongi could immediately tell something was wrong. 

“Hi— I’m sorry for barging in so suddenly like this…” Yoongi could hear the strain in his voice. 

“No issue at all, my door is always open.” He smiled but Yoongi hoped he got the point. His door was always open, no matter what the issue might be.

“I— I um… I wanted to talk to you— and… I can come back later if you’re busy, but—” Jungkook seemed fidgety and could hardly look at the doctor, the floor seeming to hold his attention more than Yoongi’s concerned gaze. 

Alarm bells were going off in his head. Normally he didn’t take walk-ins like this, but when the circumstances seemed dire, like in today's case, someone’s well-being was always more important than anything else. Something clearly wasn’t right with him, and he still had a few more hours until his first appointment anyway. No harm in this at all.

Yoongi glanced over to his secretary and they both shared the same worried expression before he guided Jungkook toward the door to his office. 

It had been seven months since he’d seen him, but Yoongi could instantly tell Jungkook seemed different. As he turned on the lights in his office that fact became more clear. Since the time that they had last seen each other, Jungkook evidently looked more tired, the dark circles around his eyes were prominent, but he did a good job of hiding it in the way his hair had grown to hang lowly over his eyes. Yoongi also thought he seemed paler, like he hadn’t seen the sun in weeks, and he could have sworn his round face had grown more gaunt as well. 

Yoongi had hoped that the couple’s absence after their last session meant that good things had come between them. Despite only having one session, he thought that maybe the glaring problems of their relationship had become apparent, and now that they were in the open, they had found themselves on a path to a happy and healthy relationship.

Yoongi wished this meeting had been a reunion of sorts, that Jungkook was coming to visit just to thank him for the session, or to simply catch up, or even just coming to ask for more advice in the long journey of building up their relationship. Any sort of sign, really, to indicate that they were working on the distressing issues in their marriage and that progress had been made in the seven months since they last saw each other.

Unfortunately, Jungkook’s appearance alone was enough to show his optimism had been in vain. And to make matters even more concerning, as soon as Yoongi shut the door behind them, he watched Jungkook haphazardly stumble over and collapse on the couch.

Yoongi hurriedly joined him by his side, his worry soaring to even greater heights seeing Jungkook desperately tangle his fingers through his hair. His grip on the strands was so firm that Yoongi feared he’d pull out the tresses threaded in his grasp. Sitting this close now, he could smell that Jungkook had been drinking, probably excessively too. It wasn’t looking good; time had not been kind to him. If anything, things seemed worse.

His soft whimpers slowly began to fill the growing silence. 

“Jungkook…?” Yoongi asked gently as he placed a hand on his back. 

“I’m s—sorry… so sorry. I should have called befo—before I came, I’m so sorry.” If it wasn’t already evident in his voice, Yoongi could see his hands in his hair were shaking.

“Like I said before, my door is always open. Did something happen?” Yoongi was trying to be calm, but the memories of their last session came flooding back in a rush and his mind raced with the possibilities of what had made him so frantic.

The question just seemed to make things worse, and like in their last session, Yoongi feared Jungkook was on the verge of another panic attack. Jungkook’s sobs became louder and his breathing grew more shallow with each breath he took.  

“Deep breaths, take your time,” Yoongi reassured, gently rubbing circles on his back. Jungkook quickly seemed to listen and tried his best to focus on the doctor’s words.

“Yuri— I—” Jungkook finally released the death grip on his hair and leaned back on the couch, letting his tears flow down his cheeks. 

“I cheated on my wife last night.” It was like he had practiced saying this with how clear it was despite the shakiness in his voice. The statement seemed to linger in the air as Yoongi processed his words. He tried not to show his immediate shock at the statement. From what he could remember from the last time he spoke with Jungkook, this was a pretty big deal, which could explain the distress. 

“I wish I was coming here to— to tell you how bad I felt about doing it, but—” Jungkook’s lip started to quiver. “I was up all night and I couldn’t stop thinking about it— I should feel bad, I want to feel bad, but…” More tears rolled down his cheeks.

“It just felt so good.” 

The confession made it all too real as he looked at the doctor. It made him feel even more like a monster.

Jungkook had spent the night trying to make himself feel bad about his time with you. He’d wandered around the apartment looking at all the pictures littered on the tables and walls of him and Yuri, hoping that would spark fond feelings of their relationship. 

If someone visiting their apartment saw the plethora of photos they have sprinkled around the place, it would seem like the couple shared many memories together. But just like their entire relationship, it was merely an illusion. 

When they first moved in Yuri had taken on the majority of the work decorating their apartment. She had an eye for interior design. Aside from modeling, she was quite passionate and knowledgeable about the subject— it’s what she originally went to school for before she was scouted and modeling became her main priority. 

The place mainly reflected her taste, but she’d ask Jungkook his opinions occasionally on some of her ideas, and he was pretty easy-going, so he just let her have her fun. He also knew how much she enjoyed it, it was one of the things he’d learned on their honeymoon when she confessed her ambition to open her own business someday. It was important to her, and it honestly warmed his heart to see how passionate she was decorating their new home together.

Right before they officially moved in, Yuri had signed them up for a bunch of photo shoots to help fill in the relatively empty picture frames around the apartment. The only memories they had were of their wedding, honeymoon, and a couple of pictures from their dates before they were engaged. Memories, yes, but certainly not enough for a couple who decided to take a leap of faith and get married so young. 

Professional photoshoots with the photographer she shot with regularly were a weekly occurrence for about a month. Jungkook had cherished this time since he was still trying to process how uncomfortable things had become after they came back from their honeymoon. That was really the only time they would speak to each other and things weren’t awkward. 

Jungkook had hoped that just being in the apartment would remind him of his marriage and ignite the shame that he had just committed a horrible sin, one that could have gotten him killed a couple of centuries ago. And yet, as Jungkook stood there trying to reminisce about all of their fond memories, he was also trying his best to ignore the way his length pleaded for you all over again.

Pathetic… more than that really.

He’d finally grabbed a beer out of the fridge at some point, hoping at the very least he could stop thinking about you and maybe try and get some sleep before he needed to go to work in the morning. The beer didn’t help, it never did. Rather it made his guilt, or his lack thereof, echo even louder. 

Jungkook had looked to Dr. Min with the hope that he would be a voice of reason, a slap to the face to make him feel the mortification he should right now. 

Jungkook stared at the doctor, just waiting for the look of disgust he was hoping for. He wanted someone to tell him how insane he sounded, how much of a terrible person he was for it. Instead, he couldn’t read the look on the doctor’s face as the words started to process in his mind. It made him that much more anxious. He wanted an immediate reaction, he wanted Dr. Min to scream at him if he had to, but instead, he just looked off in the distance as he never once stopped his gentle massage across his back.

“What makes you say that?” Dr. Min finally asked after the silence started to linger for a little too long.

“I didn’t know— know it could feel that good.” Jungkook’s body instantly reacted to the mention of last night— this morning really. It hadn’t been that long. It was all so clear and got even more so the more he tried not to think about it.

“And what makes you say that?” Dr. Min repeated with a gentle smile on his face.

Jungkook was being vague. Yoongi had a feeling this was a common occurrence, but those details truly mattered right now. 

“You don’t have to get explicit, it's just— If I’m recounting correctly, I know the last time we spoke you mentioned that you didn’t have much experience besides Yuri. What was it like then, stepping outside of your relationship?” Yoongi clarified, noticing Jungkook seemed a little confused. 

Jungkook turned away as his mind traveled back to early this morning… you, your lips, your hands, your skirt bunched around your waist. 

“She touched me.” The words just slipped out of his mouth without much thought. “No one ever did that before.” At least the way you had. As delusional as it was, for a split second he felt wanted, like someone actually craved him as badly as he did for them. It was nonsense, Jungkook just happened to be blessed that night by your unwavering kindness even to someone as pathetic as him in a moment of weakness. But still, he knew something felt different about last night.  

Yoongi hummed, remembering that the topic had come up in their session. 

“To be honest… Now that I think about it, I never really enjoyed it that much beforehand.” Jungkook stared off into the distance, coming to a revelation that he was aware of but never fully articulated until now.

“Sex?” Yoongi put it bluntly, making Jungkook’s face flush slightly.

He shyly nodded.

“I thought I did. I liked it when she just acknowledged my existence, it would make my day. I wanted anything from her really, but I think when it came to being intimate it just made me feel…” A word bounced around in his head, a sour word he knew spoke true to his feelings whenever he was with Yuri, yet it never materialized enough to explain to the doctor. After a while Jungkook just sighed and gave up, deciding to continue. “I think I just wanted her close. I wanted Yuri to want me, and I feel like that’s when I felt it the most. I craved it so much that I bet I seemed pathetic, but even then, I don’t think I really enjoyed it— not in the same way at least.” Jungkook struggled to fully articulate what he was trying to say, and just hoped Dr. Min could get the picture.

Yuri never touched him like that. She hardly touched him at all. Jungkook had always craved affection, but he’d never known how much he would truly enjoy it until now.

“I’m hopeless, aren’t I…?” This would normally have been a moment he would have tried to laugh at, but his heart hurt so much, he went back to crying. 

Why didn’t he feel guilty?

“Jungkook, look… Can I be honest with you for a second?” Yoongi eventually said. He seemed serious. 

Jungkook looked over at the doctor, ready for the slap to the face he came for. 

“I’m trying to look at this situation as objectively as I can. It’s been a while since we talked and I never really got Yuri’s side when I wanted to speak to you both one-on-one. As much as I probably shouldn’t, I think this is a situation where I need to take my therapist hat off and approach this like I’m just your friend giving you my two cents. Can I do that?” Yoongi asked before he continued. 

Jungkook steadily nodded.

Yoongi took a deep breath and one good look at Jungkook before continuing. “You don’t look good.” His words were blunt, but he had a look of genuine concern on his face. 

Jungkook’s eyes widened, not at all expecting that to be what he was going to say.

“You look like shit if I’m being honest.” Yoongi reiterated, wanting to be even more straightforward. As hurtful as it might sound, it was the truth. He didn’t even know Jungkook that well and he could clearly see the last few months had not been kind to him. It might have been different if he had no inclination as to why that might be the case, but considering what they’ve discussed so far, plus the fact that he’d briefly met his wife, he already knew a problem he could help advise on. Hopefully a bit of no-nonsense advice might set him on the right path. 

“I’ve seen all types of couples come in through those doors, and many more before I got my own office. I’ve helped couples rekindle their relationships that were in horrendous conditions.  Some were just minor issues that they needed help mediating and talking through. Others… I’ll be honest and say I’m surprised they even worked out. No relationship is perfect, but as long as there’s love, there’s hope. You and Yuri are a special case. You both never had those feelings at any point of your relationship that I could help remind you of.” 

Yoongi had spent some time after Jungkook’s last session contemplating the best advice he could give to a couple who had never properly loved each other. Helping them was basically asking them to build a relationship from scratch, a mission Jungkook seemed dead set on doing, and it might have been possible if their relationship didn’t hold such animosity. 

The way Yuri acted in the one session he met her in was honestly unacceptable. Her words were said out of spite, not out of hurt, or even in hopes of betterment— she just wanted to make it hurt as much as possible. Hostile relationships weren’t a foreign subject to him, but it was clear by Jungkook’s panic attack that what he saw probably didn’t even scratch the surface of their relationship behind closed doors.

Yoongi would help anyone who came through his doors, but when he suspected someone was causing more harm than good, and not even trying to make things work, there was little he could do. Being even more honest with himself, he didn’t want to help them. Toxic relationships aren’t good for anyone’s well-being, and it went against the very reason he became a therapist to encourage Jungkook to “stick it out” and hope things get better. 

This wasn’t even just toxic… 

Jungkook looked like he got hit by a bus, and then it backed up, ran over him again, backed up, and just kept repeating the cycle to make sure they got him. He did not look good, and although he didn’t know Jungkook all that well and there could be many things in his life that might be causing his mental break, he could never forget his face as Yuri spewed those harsh words at him.

What he did know was that she certainly wasn’t helping.

“You and Yuri… I don’t think your relationship is healthy to continue— not now at the very least. I think you need some time to regain your footing before even entertaining the idea of having healthy discussions about your relationship. I never thought I’d say this, but I think the affair could be a good thing for you in some way. Hopefully it might get you to think more about your relationship with your wife and could aid in the overall discussion on whether it should continue.” It was certainly strange hearing that out of the doctor’s mouth. Never in a million years did Jungkook expect that when he came over.

“The fact that you’re telling me you didn’t really enjoy sex in general until last night, that you only wanted it as a way to get close to Yuri… I mean, I hope you know that’s not good.” Yoongi laid it out plainly, hoping he would see the issue. 

Jungkook stared down at the ground, seemingly lost in thought. “But it’s all my fault…” 

“Jungkook—”

“It’s my fault, everything is. If I was better— fuck, and here I am cheating on her— I— I—” The tears started spilling past his eyes, and Yoongi could tell Jungkook was seconds away from a breakdown. 

His hands quickly tangled in his hair, but even with the dark locks in the way Yoongi could still see the way they shook. His breathing grew more shallow, and it was obvious he wasn’t listening to him anymore.

Yoongi quickly leaned over and wrapped an arm around him.

“Take deep breaths for me.” Yoongi softly instructed, but things got worse before they got better. 

He wasn’t entirely surprised this was happening, Jungkook seemed off since the moment he first said hello. Things had since escalated, but he feared this attack had started long before he stepped back into his office.

Jungkook seemed panicked realizing that this was happening again. He was almost hyperventilating at this point, but Yoongi was there just like the last time. Jungkook looked at him for help with tears in his eyes and Yoongi made sure he held his gaze as he started taking calm, deep breaths, hoping Jungkook would mirror him.

It was bad, really bad actually. Yoongi was starting to worry Jungkook might pass out, but eventually he was able to catch his breath enough so he could participate in the breathing exercises. 

“I’m— I’m so sorry— I’m so—so sorry!” Yoongi was shocked Jungkook was able to talk at all, but unsurprised that he was back to apologizing for something he didn’t need too. 

This, this is exactly why Yoongi truly believed their relationship was beyond saving at this point. This wasn’t just a rough patch, and even the word toxic didn’t feel like it was enough either. Abuse— emotional abuse— Jungkook was showing similar symptoms to those he’s treated who came from situations where their partner was verbally abusive, degrading them every day to the point they saw little value in themselves anymore. But this was a huge accusation, one Yoongi didn’t want to share with Jungkook just yet. He didn’t know Yuri or the situation enough to throw that term at her, but Yoongi just knew this relationship was not good for Jungkook in the slightest.

He eventually managed to calm Jungkook down enough to repeat the phrase he told him last time while he went to get him some water.

“It’s okay not to be okay.” Cleverly handpicked from the title of the popular Netflix show many of his patients were familiar with. 

Jungkook had calmed down for the most part. They both sat in silence— Jungkook’s soft whines occasionally filled the space along with the crinkling of the water bottle he held tightly in his grasp. It honestly hurt to watch him like this. It’s not like he knew the guy all that well, but Yoongi was always quick to get attached to anyone he looked after… and something about Jungkook reminded him of a stray puppy he found on the street. It was sick and injured, and Yoongi wanted nothing more than to take it home and nurse it back to health. Now, Jungkook wasn’t a stray puppy by any means, but from the meetings they shared he held the same innocence and fragility you might look at a puppy with. He was so broken, young, and had so much going for him still.

It wasn’t even Jungkook’s fault that he ended up in this situation, a crazy expectation was placed on him at a young age in a world that seemed so foreign to the doctor. Yoongi might not understand it, but he couldn’t just sit back and watch Jungkook essentially give up and spiral further and further into a hole he might not eventually be able to pull himself out of.

“You don’t have to answer this if you’re not comfortable; I’m just curious… Who was it with?” The question seemed to linger in the air for a long time. At first, Yoongi thought Jungkook just wasn’t in a talking mood anymore, or maybe he needed to clarify, but eventually he answered.

“She works at Golden Tech… we stayed late last night working on things and…” Jungkook trailed off, letting the silence speak louder than he could.

Yoongi nodded his head, getting the picture. “Was it just a spur of the moment thing or…?” he continued.

Jungkook was quiet for a little while, but eventually, he shook his head as a few tears trickled down his cheeks.

“No… yes… maybe…? I had been thinking about her for a while and… it had been so long since Yuri and I… you know…? We had a fight that morning because of it and… I don’t know, I think I had a breakdown. She was there for me and so warm and—” Jungkook had to stop himself abruptly knowing how strange that sounded. It made him think back to his time with you in his office. His face flushed at the recollection, and Yoongi smiled at him.

“It’s alright. She sounds nice if she was there for you like that. How long have you thought about this?” 

“It’s been years— probably since she started working at the company.” Jungkook felt himself getting choked up at the shame of it all. “It got worse as time went on and I saw more of her— it’s one of the reasons I booked Yuri and I for therapy back then— she was in my head too much.”  

Interesting.

“Do you have feelings for her?” Another blunt question from the doctor that Jungkook was certainly unprepared for. What he said was so off the wall that it warranted a spit-take like he was in some sitcom. He was left completely unable to process the words that spilled from Dr. Min’s mouth. The question honestly warranted an even more dramatic response. 

“W-What?!” Jungkook stared at the doctor.

“You heard me.” Yoongi was both joking and incredibly serious. Feelings would change the whole story.

“It’s not like that,” Jungkook stated confidently. “I was just desperate, and I’m very married. It was just a mistake, a fluke.” He echoed your words from last night. You were right after all.

“A fluke? But didn’t you come in here saying you couldn’t stop thinking about it?” Yoongi pointed out.

Jungkook suddenly got very quiet.

“Okay Jungkook, I’m going to need you to listen very carefully to what I’m about to say— you can do that, right?” Yoongi put his hand on Jungkook’s shoulder to get him to look him in the eye. He hated eye contact, it just made him flustered, but he would do anything to ensure Jungkook was paying attention.

“In all my years as a couples therapist I never thought I’d say this, but I think taking some time apart from Yuri to go out and live your own life might be the best option to go from here. I think you’re not in the right headspace yet to have a productive conversation with her about the issues in your relationship— I think you could use some time apart to clear your head and get your thoughts in order.”

Blunt, the doctor wasn’t beating around the bush at all.

“You need to take some time for yourself and make sure you’re okay before prioritizing your relationship. You’re still so young, you got married really young— I feel like it’s hard to even have those conversations with Yuri when you might not even be sure what you want in the first place. That’s not your fault, but you deserve to take some time for yourself to figure it out.” 

Yoongi was still working on how to navigate his own marriage and he specialized in the field. Managing a relationship with the newly added challenge of parenthood was a territory he’d only covered with clients in the past, but experiencing it personally was a completely different story. Even he was still learning to deal with the big change in him and his wife’s life. He couldn’t imagine going through all the challenges of marriage when he was twenty-six, let alone twenty-two. That certainly would have spelled disaster. 

“I think these issues run deeper than what I could help you with in couples therapy, and honestly Jungkook, I recommend taking some time to evaluate if your relationship is something you want to continue. I don’t know what happens behind closed doors, so I don’t want to overstep, but I’m seeing a lot of red flags in the way Yuri treats you. No relationship should have you feeling like this, and at the very least, I think some time apart will help you get some perspective and communicate this to her.” 

Jungkook continued to stare at him with wide eyes, and Yoongi just hoped he was listening.

“Removing yourself entirely I think should be the first step— focusing on yourself, doing the things you like, and spending time with people who make you feel happy and appreciated would be good for you. It would hopefully help get you back on your feet. However, I know this situation is still complicated.” 

“You should tell Yuri what happened last night, your feelings about it, why it happened, etcetera… I know it will be hard, and I can’t tell you what her reaction to this might be, but it’s in the past now, and honesty is the least you can offer her at this point.” Despite his mixed feelings toward Yuri, he still didn’t condone cheating. He’d been on the other side of that story before, and going behind someone’s back and lying might honestly be worse than the act itself.   

“It will give her the chance to make her own decision about the future of your relationship. If she doesn’t end things right then and there and doesn’t mention it already, you should say that you need a little space. You can say this was my idea if you have to. But for your sake Jungkook, and for the sake of your relationship, I think you should take a step back so you can have the opportunity to learn and explore exactly what you want moving forward.” This seemed like the only path Jungkook could take at this point. He didn’t know how Yuri would react to this considering they never truly had a relationship, but if she still wanted to work things out, Jungkook needed some time away from her to hopefully give him a chance to be in a better mental state. Then maybe they could have a proper conversation about the future of their relationship.   

Yoongi had only turned away for a second during his closing statement, but it was enough that when he looked back, Jungkook’s eyes had fluttered closed, and he looked like he was about three seconds away from dozing off. 

“Jungkook, did you hear me?” Yoongi shook him lightly, making Jungkook jolt awake.

“Yes— sorry! Sorry, sorry— fuck, I’m so sorry!” Jungkook was apologizing once again, and Yoongi already felt bad. 

“I just, sorry— I hardly slept last night or the night before… I’m running on three hours of sleep from two days ago.” Jungkook tried to laugh it off as he rubbed his tired eyes, but having this moment of calm after everything that’s happened was enough for the need to sleep to overwhelm him. 

Yoongi softly rubbed his back again. “You know that’s not good, right?”

“I know, and I have this big meeting later— I’m doomed.” In that instant, the haziness of sleep had clouded his brain. He couldn’t think straight, and he had to present at the meeting later along with you… Jungkook didn’t notice Yoongi’s concerned gaze as he tried to wake himself up. 

“You did hear me earlier, right?” Yoongi asked again.

“I did…” He wasn’t lying. His eyes might have closed at some point, but he was taking in every word the entire time.

“What will you do next then?”

“I don’t know.” It was a lot. Too much was happening and he was too tired to really think about what he should do right now.

Yoongi nodded. “It’s a lot, I understand. I just want to make sure you’ll think about what I said.”

Jungkook looked over and Yoongi could see how quickly his eyes had grown red.  He looked like he could pass out at any moment. 

“I will.”

Yoongi watched Jungkook rub his eyes before he tried to open them up. It looked like it was taking everything in him to keep them open. “Jungkook, maybe you should take a nap before you head out again.” Yoongi suddenly said.

Jungkook blinked a couple of times before turning toward the doctor. “Huh?”

“You can sleep on the couch. I don’t have my first appointment till 12:30, so you can stay here until then.” It was a generous offer, and one he wouldn’t normally make, but he felt it was necessary given Jungkook’s condition. 

“That’s really nice of you, but I have work I need to—” 

“Mmm, you don’t think your work will be affected if you haven’t slept right in the last 48 hours?” Yoongi interrupted. 

Jungkook was about to say something, but the more he thought about it and his eyes continued to sting, the more he knew the doctor was right. Truth be told, Jungkook doesn't sleep much these days anyway. He was busy as it was, but almost any time he got in bed, his head would be swimming with so many thoughts it took forever to fall asleep. However, even then, these last two days had definitely taken a toll on him. If it was any other day, he would have insisted he needed to get back to work, but really, he just had to be there for the meeting later; any other work could be handled at a different point if need be. The doctor was right as well— how could he get anything done like this? Even walking seemed like an impossible task.

“You’d really let me stay?” Jungkook’s voice was soft, but Yoongi noticed he sounded surprised.

“Of course. Rest up.” Yoongi gave him a slight smile before standing up. “I’ll just be over at my desk doing a little work. I won’t be loud.” 

Jungkook stared up at Dr. Min with tears in his eyes. He could hardly believe anyone was being this nice to him, let alone after he admitted to cheating on his wife. The doctor didn’t notice, or if he did, he didn’t say anything as he moved over to his desk.

Jungkook quickly whipped out his phone, and after a bit of scrolling, found the person he needed to call. All it took was a few rings for him to answer.

“Hyung…” Jungkook was groggy and hoarse from all the crying. Just the thought of sleep alone was enough to wear him down even more.

“Jungkook? Where are you?” Jimin’s concerned voice was heard on the other end.

“Doesn’t matter— just… I wanted to tell you to let everyone know who might be looking for me, that I’m going to be a little late today.” 

“Late? What about the meeting later?” Jimin exclaimed, a little baffled. Of all the days to be late…

“I’ll be there. If Y/n asks—” There it was, the person he tried not to think about at all.

Jimin noticed the pause. “Jungkook?”

“Uh, if Y/n asks where I am, tell her I’ll be there an hour beforehand so we can do our final preparations.” Seeing you again… he was really not looking forward to seeing you again.

“Jungkook…”

He rubbed his sleepy eyes, but nothing he did made them any easier to keep open. “Yes?”

“What’s going on? Why are you going to be late?” Jimin was concerned. Despite the awkwardness that had settled between the pair, Jimin never once stopped worrying about him.

“I just— I didn’t get much sleep last night.” It wasn’t a lie necessarily, but he definitely wasn’t going to tell him the whole truth. He couldn’t tell Jimin just how awful he had become.

There was silence over the line for a little while. Maybe Jimin was expecting Jungkook to continue and elaborate further, but then realized that was all the information he was going to get out of him.

“I see… sleep well then, and try to get here as soon as you can. Things have been pretty hectic today.” Jimin pointed out.

Jungkook lazily chuckled. “They’re hectic everyday these days.” Q4s were always so busy.

Jimin laughed as well. “Alright, see you later then.”

“Bye, hyung.” And with that, Jungkook clicked off the call. 

He didn’t notice, but a warm smile had settled on Yoongi’s face. He didn’t have to know who he called, he could tell they were close.

“You seriously don’t mind me staying here? I’ve been told I snore…” Jungkook’s face flushed at the mention of it. Yuri would sometimes kick him awake if he got too loud.

“Sleep!” Yoongi called out as he started looking through his computer. 

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jungkook sheepishly take off his shoes before grabbing the blanket draped over the couch. He laid down, and it probably wasn’t even two minutes later that Yoongi knew he’d actually fallen asleep. He lightly chuckled to himself before getting started on the work he set out to do. It wasn’t much, but he did come early just to make sure he got it done so he wouldn’t get home too late.

To be honest, Yoongi hardly noticed Jungkook was even there at all. It just felt like the times he’d be working at home and Heran would be passed out on the couch with their daughter sleeping in her arms. But Jungkook wasn’t lying earlier; he did snore. It wasn’t anything too obnoxious, but occasionally Yoongi was reminded someone was in fact in the room with him. Even then, he hardly noticed— again, it was just like home.

Cute. 

Jungkook was truly out cold. Last night was overwhelming. First, the whole situation with you sent him spiraling, and then his quest to make himself feel bad about it proved to be a harder task than it should have been. 

No matter what good memory he recounted of him and Yuri last night, the thought of you on his desk was like a massive tidal wave that washed any attempts he made to remember his wife back to sea. In truth, he spent more of the night trying not to give into temptation than the thought of any guilt about his actions. He'd already betrayed Yuri enough; relieving the ache for some reason that was a line he couldn’t cross. 

These thoughts created a horrible cycle in his mind of “you just cheated on your wife” to then “but it just felt so good” to “but you know how disappointed Yuri would be if you do that” to “but it felt so fucking good” to “you’re an actual piece of shit, you deserve feeling like this.” It had his head spinning. 

He was tired and tried downing a beer so he could quickly pass out and he wouldn’t have to think about it anymore. But then Yuri came home— 5:35am on the dot. 

She looked good, so good, even with most of the lights off. Yuri had changed from her off-the-shoulder, black, sweater dress into something more relaxing— a cozy black hoodie and gray sweatpants. Yuri was also carrying the tote she used for short excursions that weren’t overnight, but far enough to come back at a time like this— she had to go to and from Busan today. She must have been so tired, and he’d spent the night cheating on her.

Jungkook had been so out of it. He was drunk, very drunk, and he was so tired, but he just couldn’t fall asleep. Maybe he would have reacted better seeing her, but his whole body felt numb when she noticed he was sitting at the dining table. 

This would have been the time for him to get on his knees and beg for her forgiveness, but instead he just continued to sit there.

Yuri hurriedly walked over and despite how much the room was spinning, he could tell by her footsteps she was mad.

“Jungkook, are you drunk?!” She exclaimed, but the words were hazy in his mind. The question was redundant, all the empty beer bottles on the table would have given her the answer. 

“Yuri… I’msorry.” His words slurred. He bet he looked pathetic. He hasn’t gotten drunk in front of her that often. He never wanted her to see that side of him, or rather, how that other side might act if she did.

The silence lingered in the apartment for a little and maybe if the lights were on, she would have seen his lip quivering before she heard his sobs.

“I’m sorry.” His sad attempt at an apology rang in the air. “I’m so sorry, so sorry, sorry. I’m—”

“What is wrong with you?” She honestly sounded baffled. Through the haziness of it all, he recognized that she likely had no idea what he was talking about.

There were so many things he could be apologizing for, yesterday morning was a great example. Maybe that’s what she thought he was talking about. Or maybe it was the fact that he was drunk. There were just so many things, but cheating on her probably wasn’t where her immediate train of thought went.

“I’m sorry!” He just sobbed out, an apology not for cheating on her necessarily, but because he couldn’t find it in himself to feel bad about it.

Yuri had no idea what was going on, and it was so late. “Get yourself together, please. It’s too late for this and I’m too tired to try and understand you. I’m going to bed and you better figure this out before joining me.” Yuri just sighed, slinging her bag over her shoulder once again before walking off toward their bedroom. The fact she even offered to share the bed was astonishing. He deserved less than the couch at this point.

With Yuri here, it made it all too real how badly he had betrayed her. They were meant to be playing the part of a happily married couple, they were meant to be a happily married couple, but he let his own selfish desires get in the way and now that dream was shattered. Why couldn’t he have just waited? All he ever wanted was to be a good husband to her and yet he couldn’t even bring himself to feel bad about the night he shared with you. He’d cheated and still couldn’t stop thinking with his dick for more than two seconds, instead overwhelmed by the way his whole body hadn’t stopped tingling since he helped you off his desk. He never deserved forgiveness. Horrible. He couldn’t go any lower than this. 

He was too drunk to remember when the shaking began, or when it got hard to breathe, but he knew he had to listen to your advice. He needed to talk to someone, now.

Jungkook had looked up when Dr. Min’s office opened, and he was at the door shortly after the secretary got there. She had given him those same sad eyes she did before he left the last time when she saw him stumble into the office.

“Dr. Min will be here shortly…” she had assured him. She could probably see how on edge he was.

To be honest, the whole night was a blur at this point. One minute he was at the dining table, the next he was calling Dae-Jung (who was kind enough to pick him up, despite the early hour and how his words slurred together on the phone), then he was in Dr. Min’s office. It felt like time was passing by without him. 

Jungkook never checked the time to know when he fell asleep, but when he felt the gentle touch of Dr. Min letting him know it was time to get up, he knew he hadn’t slept long enough. Just opening his eyes was a task that seemed too much to overcome. He needed eight hours, probably more at this point. He honestly felt worse after waking up than he did before he fell asleep. He hoped it was just the grogginess needing to wear off, but the sounds of amusement from the doctor he eventually realized was sitting on the table right in front of him, were not the best received.

“You might want to fix your hair.” Yoongi chuckled lightly, seeing the long strands sticking up in different directions.

Cute.

His head hurt, his eyes hurt, and he wanted to go back to sleep so badly. 

It certainly looked that way from Yoongi’s perspective as well. Jungkook had this grumpy look on his face as he steadily tried to sit up, and his eyes just barely fluttered open so he could see they were slightly red.

“Do you feel better?” Yoongi asked, and Jungkook quickly shook his head.

“I’m not surprised. You really need to get more sleep… If you can, you should take the rest of the day off after your meeting. Give yourself the day to try and get yourself back together.” He suggested. “Doctor’s orders.”

The thought was tempting. The main task he had to complete today was the meeting. Everything else, as far as he knew, could be handled later. But he already hadn’t shown up to work this morning, what would everyone think? What might they be saying right now? Just the thought of anyone thinking he was slacking off made the idea seem selfish. 

Jungkook didn’t say anything though, as he tried to muster up any energy he had regained to get up from the couch.

“Oh, and before I forget—” Suddenly Jungkook felt a small piece of paper in his hand. It took a minute for him to realize what it was, but it was similar to the one Yoongi gave him after his last session. 

“Please make sure to visit him this time. I may be a therapist as well, but I think he’d be much better to talk to about your individual needs.” Yoongi was almost pleading. 

Kim Namjoon. Right, he forgot to do that last time. 

“Talk to him please, but if you ever need someone else to just chat with unofficially, you can stop by the office at any time or call me if you need to. You have my work phone, but at the bottom of the note I wrote my personal number.” If Jungkook was a patient, this probably would have been crossing a line, but he hasn’t been an official client since his last session back in April.

This was all unofficial, and it would continue to stay that way until things improved enough that alarm bells wouldn’t go off anytime he saw Jungkook. For some reason, he doubted that would happen anytime soon, at least as long as he was with Yuri. 

Yoongi made Jungkook agree to book an appointment soon, and said he’d check up with Namjoon to make sure he fulfilled his promise. They also promised to talk again soon as Jungkook started fixing himself up before heading out.

He was still slightly hungover, but the water he drank earlier helped ease things a little, so the headache wasn’t as bad as what it could be considering how much he imbibed last night.

It wasn’t long before Jungkook was getting a text from his driver that he was outside. 11:43am— an hour and twenty until the meeting and less than twenty minutes till he promised to meet you. He had to hurry and pray the traffic wasn’t bad, he still had to head home to shower and change….

With a swift goodbye, Jungkook was slinging his suit jacket and coat on before heading downstairs.

•────•──────────•────•

The meeting went okay. It was mainly thanks to you though. You were a great presenter, and things all went relatively how you both had planned. But Jungkook could have done better— he hadn’t even needed to talk much, but maybe it was the lack of sleep, or the hangover, or the massive wall of anxiety he practically slammed into that made things so difficult.

Jungkook had given presentations before, many times actually, and while he was always a little nervous, most of it would go away the minute he got up there and he was able to say what he needed to say to get his point across. For some reason, his anxiety was almost crippling this time. 

Jungkook had hardly thought about the presentation. So much shit had been happening it had almost been an afterthought. But while he was practicing with you, he was not prepared for the jitters he got as time drew nearer for the executives to come in.

It was even worse when it was actually time. He stood up there with you and he couldn’t stop shaking. The eyes of the executives were too much. It felt like that nightmare all over again. It was like they knew what he did, how terrible and incapable he was, and how he deserved how shitty his life had turned out.

Somehow he was able to cover all the points he needed to, but the shakiness in his voice was embarrassing, and he nearly had a breakdown when he saw their confused expressions staring back at him. He felt bad, so bad actually, because he was ruining this for you.

And you… Jungkook didn’t know what to do seeing you again. As soon as he walked into the meeting room, he was filled with disgust, but also wanted nothing more than to pull you close once more. It was horrible. 

You looked so good too, you always did. Your light blue turtleneck was neatly tucked into your white skirt, your signature lipstick was back on display, and your hair was styled nicely as it always was. You were so polished, a completely different look to how he dropped you off last night. And you looked amazing either way in his opinion.

But things were awkward, very awkward as you started your preparations. And to make matters worse, you were mad at him, or at the very least it was obvious you didn’t want to be around him when he finally made it to the meeting room. He saw it for a split second after he walked through the door and you made eye contact. It was a silent moment when you both acknowledged the night before, a moment you both realized that last night had in fact happened— but you were far quicker to move on from it, choosing to stick to the promise made to put the whole thing behind you.

Last night was a mistake, a fluke. It shouldn’t have happened.

The doctor was right that things would be different if feelings were involved, but last night was nothing more than sex. He was horny, sad, and you just happened to be there…. If you both acknowledged it then it would become something, something more than it needed to be. He was married, you were his coworker, and that’s how it needed to stay. 

But still, for a moment he wanted to say something. He wanted it to be something, because as much as he knew he needed to try and push past this, last night was still on his mind. Dr. Min didn’t help either. He thought he would give him the slap in the face he needed, but his words stuck to him.

What he wanted? Why did it matter what he wanted? He was the one who needed to fix this, he was the one who messed up. But for some reason anytime he thought about it you would pop into his head. You had been just a taste of the things he hadn’t discovered, and like a veil finally being lifted from his eyes, he could finally see how immense the world he lived in was. But you were forbidden, a fruit he couldn’t have, one he shouldn’t want. All he had was a taste and he wanted more. He wanted you in all the ways possible and to explore a side of himself he didn’t know existed until he was with you that night. The only experience he had was with Yuri, and he barely explored his sexuality outside of his relationship— Yuri making up 95% of his sexual experience and 100% of his relationship experience. He knew he was an amateur going into his marriage, but he never knew sex could feel that good.

He wanted Yuri, he wanted his wife, he wanted to be her husband, but as much as he kept telling himself that, the doctor’s words were back in his head once again and that side he was ashamed of would come out. He wanted you, and it was worse this time— instead of his imagination fueling his fantasy, he had an actual memory to look back on. The more he thought about it, the more the doctor’s words rang in his head. 

Would the best thing for his and Yuri’s relationship really be a break from each other? How did that make sense at all? How would he ever fix the mess he made if he wasn’t with her? And then to tell her about the affair? That was just a straight ticket to divorce and failure. The amount of people that would be let down if they knew what he did… it just didn’t make sense.

He had to fix this. He had to fix this. Failure wasn’t an option. 

•────•──────────•────•

The next few days weren’t any better. Somehow, it got worse.

He thought things would be awkward for a little while, but eventually you both would fall back into your routine. He thought the memory of that night would fade, and you would just become his coworker again. That mistake, that fluke, it would be like it never happened. 

But it did, and he couldn’t forget it. It seemed to be the only thing he could think about these days: your lips, your hands, your body, how it felt to have you right there on his desk. 

It should have been a mistake, it should have been a fluke, Jungkook should have been trying his very hardest to push that night out of his mind, to pretend that it didn’t happen, but… 

Sometimes he’d think about it too much. His mind betrayed him first and then his body would follow soon after. It seemed to happen every time he was alone. In the shower, in his office, in the gym, there was even this one time you assisted some of the managers with a presentation and he nearly lost his mind trying to keep it together. He completely forgot how to act like a normal person around you. Anytime you were in the same vicinity, the awkward conversations you used to share had downgraded to just standing there and staring at you like an idiot. He didn’t know what to say around you, how to make things go back to the small, awkward, yet friendly conversations you both would share whenever you saw each other in these last few weeks since you’d been promoted.  

He was a mess, and his mind and thoughts were muddled by a growing need that just got worse as the days passed. Each time he’d plead for his body to listen to him, to forget about that night so he could focus on Yuri again. There were too many times he had to fight every force of nature to stop himself from giving in. Tears would stream down his face as he thought about you, Yuri, and tried his best not to reach down his pants and fix it. 

He never thought it could get any worse than what he went through during those ten months of torture, but in just a matter of days you had him more needy than he knew what to do with.

Yesterday, two days after he had you on his desk, he tried to get Yuri to help him, but he should have known better. Jungkook had been in the shower with tears in his eyes as he looked down and saw what thinking about you did to him. He was trying so hard to be good for Yuri. He’d already betrayed her once, and he didn’t want to do it again, but it hurt so much.

In desperation, he quickly got out of the shower and went to Yuri who was lying peacefully on their bed, scrolling through her phone. Jungkook had tried to be subtle as he got in beside her, his hair was still damp and all. He scooted close and wrapped his arms around her waist. As soon as he was close enough she could feel it, he knew she could. Tears immediately welled up in his eyes all over again when he noticed her confusion before her realization of what was happening. This wasn’t as innocent as pulling her close because he wanted to cuddle, no, his perverse intentions couldn’t have been more clear.

He felt like a monster.

“Jungk—”

“Help— help me— please…” He quietly sobbed into her shoulder. His hips felt like they had a mind of their own, and he started grinding into the flimsy fabric of her shorts.

It was a desperate plea so he could forget about you and finally move on. He wanted Yuri to make him remember that she was his wife, he was her husband, and you were nothing more than his coworker. He would have taken anything, really. He would have done anything to make him forget.

For a moment, she didn’t say anything, she let him have his fun. He was such a mess— his hand slowly ran under her tank top feeling her warm skin while he practically fucked her with their clothes still on. As more time passed, the more he lost himself in the pleasure. He didn’t need long at all; he just wanted it to stop hurting… anything to stop hurting.

His breathy sighs of pleasure filled the room in between the sound of the sheets shifting underneath him. There was a moment he thought Yuri would let him have this, after all, she still thought that it’d been ten months since he’d had the sweet bliss of release. But of course, he was too greedy.

“Yuri…” He sighed in hopes that would be enough to engage her, because even now he was picturing you on his desk. His hand came up to tug lightly on the waistband of her shorts. Two minutes tops and he could forget it all, get his priorities straight, and you were nothing to him again.

“Jungkook, stop! What the fuck are you doing?!” Yuri finally snapped as she turned around to face him. But even then, he still didn’t stop entirely. It was just enough to get him to slow down.

“Please— please— Yuri!” He cried because it hurt so much, and you just wouldn’t leave him alone.

Yuri was quick at gaining the upper hand, and she was on top of him just like that day. She had his hands pinned down and was sitting right where he needed her. 

“What is going on with you these days?!” She was disappointed, and he was too. She was right; what had gotten into him? Jungkook just sobbed because it still hurt.

“Help…” He begged like it meant anything. Maybe if he had told her right then and there about the affair she would have assisted. Maybe, or maybe not, but maybe that was what it would take for him to focus on her again. But just like the day this whole mess started, she seemed completely uninterested in helping him. 

“No.” She didn’t beat around the bush whatsoever, and maybe on a different occasion, he would have appreciated the honesty instead of leading him on to the point he was a whimpering mess underneath her. It just hurt too much.

Jungkook slightly shifted his hips— it was just enough to elicit a breathy moan from his lips and for the shame he felt all over to wash away in a second.

Yuri looked down at him questionably, he normally wasn’t like this at all.

“If you won’t help, then can I at least— can I fix this myself?” Jungkook looked up at her with pleading eyes. 

“Wha—”

“You’re probably tired. You’ve been really busy these days, and I’m sorry I bothered you, but—” Tears slipped down his cheeks as he subtly tried grinding into her a little harder. “I can’t wait. It hurts so much, Yuri— please can I fix this myself…” Jungkook never thought he’d reach this type of low.

First the affair, and now he was begging just because he couldn’t keep himself together long enough to wait until she needed him too. He couldn’t even imagine the disappointment she must be experiencing. Her eyes said as much before she even spoke.

“You can’t keep it together?” Her tone was low, and though Jungkook could sense she was mad, to his messed-up brain it was just more fuel to the fire of desire that was raging out of control at this point. It was hot.

He hurriedly shook his head.

“I feel like I might lose it just from you sitting on my lap.” He cried, tears streaming down his face because that wasn’t an exaggeration at all. He felt so bad. Why was he so pathetic? But at the same time, why couldn’t she see his desperation? He just wanted the chance to be with his wife, the person he should be with instead of his coworker in the middle of the night, at his job, right on the desk he worked on. 

Suddenly, Yuri chuckled as she looked down at him. She leaned down so her lips hovered over his cheek. He wished she didn’t have his hands pinned down so he could have tried to push her to meet his lips, but she kept moving up so her mouth was right by his ear.

This angle… Jungkook wished she was wearing one of those tank tops today. The view would have been amazing.

“You really can’t keep it together, huh?” Yuri said again, right into his ear, and he very well could have lost it right then and there. 

“No…” He sobbed.

Yuri pulled back slightly so she could look him in the eye. 

“I don’t know what’s going on with you Jungkook, or whatever has gotten into that thick skull of yours, but I’m going to need whatever it is out immediately. You operate on my time, you wait until I’m ready. The fact that you can’t do that is just pathetic. I don’t care if it’s been months, I don’t understand how you think begging will do anything— a good fucking husband would know how to wait.” Every syllable was filled with the disappointment and malice he knew he deserved.

His heart wrenched at every word.

“I just— I just didn’t want to make a mistake— I’m sorry.” Jungkook was bawling at this point, his voice shaking uncontrollably. His face was probably red and soaking wet from how much he was crying. But he was lying right through his teeth. He’d already made a mistake, a horrible, terrible one. She had every right to never forgive him if she ever found out. It had only been a few days since he had you on his desk, and even after he had gone to such lengths to quell the ache of the last ten months, in just two days, he was in an even worse state than before. 

“A mistake?” She laughed.

“You’re the mistake— agreeing to get married to you was the mistake. I don’t ask much from you, yet you just keep disappointing me. I don’t even know why I still try to do this.” Her grip on his wrists had tightened so much it was starting to hurt. With the look in her eyes, Jungkook felt numb at this point. He wanted to apologize, but he couldn’t speak. Even if he could utter an apology, it would never be enough for the pain he’s caused her. Every word was true. Yuri was always right.

“But nevertheless, here I am. I don’t want to fight with you today Jungkook. All I ask is that you’ll wait, and until then…” Yuri’s hand let go of his wrist and started tracing from his jaw, down to his neck, over the expanse of his sweater, and eventually settled on the waistband of his shorts. She roughly pulled it before letting go, the pain of the elastic slapping back to his burning skin made an uncontrollable moan leave his lips before he could stop it. His head was spinning, he couldn’t keep up with what was happening anymore, and it was almost overwhelming.

“Stay away from me.” Her voice had grown soft, sultry almost, as she stared at him.

Jungkook felt almost crazed as the tears kept spilling from his eyes, her words loudly echoing through his head, but he was still hard, and he didn’t know what hurt more at this point. He was shaking and had the intense urge to run away and hide from the world, but he wanted nothing more than for Yuri to touch him more. It was selfish and disgusting, he just couldn’t get any worse.

With a hand now free, Jungkook suddenly found the strength to change the position. But before he realized what he was doing, Yuri was underneath him.

“Don’t do that, please.” Jungkook sighed, the position making his body instantly react, but his heart hurt too much to even attempt anything again. “I’ll leave you alone, I just want to make you happy— I’ll do anything, I hope you know that, but just… don’t make this hard for me, please.” Jungkook begged through his teary gaze. 

“I’m sorry I want you all the time, but when you touch me like that… I’m weak, you said it yourself.” He tried to laugh through the pain, but he was starting to feel shaky again.

“I just want to be a good husband, but I’m bad at this, so… just…” He was starting to get so choked up that it was hard to speak. “Just… just… just…” Jungkook buried himself in her neck so she wouldn’t have to see how pathetic he was right now. 

In the moment he missed you and how you comforted him that night; your hands across his back, your gentle touches that made him feel warm all over. He didn’t deserve it— not then, not now… but he still missed it.

“Go easy on me, please.” He couldn’t believe he had the audacity to say this like they haven’t been married for nearly four years. He’d run out of chances at this point. He should know by now what she likes and doesn’t. Even though they hadn’t spent that much time together, Jungkook knew before he walked out of the bathroom that she wouldn’t like this, that she'd get upset, yet he still tried anyway, hoping she might put him out of his misery.

There was no hope for him at this point. How Yuri hadn’t given up on him entirely was astounding.

“Jungkook, get off of me and stop fucking crying, that shit gets annoying after the billionth time.” Yuri groaned, already feeling her neck starting to get soaked. 

He really missed you— even though he didn’t deserve it, but you made him feel so good. He wished he was back to that Tuesday, the day he cried in your arms and took you right there on his desk. He missed you so much.

Jungkook quickly got off of Yuri and the bed entirely. He hastily started making his way to the bathroom once again.

“You better stop that before you—” He didn’t slam the door in her face, but Jungkook was in too much of a rush to let her finish. 

With the outside world finally shut out, Jungkook turned on the light, and from where he was standing at the door, he could see himself in the mirror. He was a mess, he looked like shit. His face was red and puffy, his face stained with tears that just kept falling from his eyes, and because he wasn’t wearing any underwear, the prominent outline of the very reason he got himself into this situation was embarrassingly obvious.

Jungkook hated what he saw, so he quickly turned the lights back off. In the darkness, all he could picture was you once again. That night, your soft warmth, your sympathetic gaze. Why did you look at him like that? Why didn’t you see what Yuri did? But he didn’t want to think about that right now, how much his heart ached, or how his mind cried out to the void to end the pain because he was just making his wife miserable. No. Instead, the memory of you on his desk was too vivid. He could practically still feel you wrapped around him, your hands on his skin, your lips on his lips, he couldn’t forget it.  He didn’t want to.

Tears spilled from his eyes faster than his hand found its way into his shorts. He hesitated for only a second. Yuri was right outside, and this was so wrong. He’d just disappoint her even more than he already has. As shameful as it was, that hesitation only lasted for a second before he hurriedly had his fingers wrapped around his length as he steadily started pumping his needy cock. 

“I’m— so sorry!” Jungkook cried out as quietly as he could. Just one big disappointment. But you, your lips, your hands— fuck, your hands. Your fingers through his hair, your nails down his back, your hand around his cock. It never felt like that before. Jungkook didn’t know it could feel like that—  sex never felt like that. Not with his first, not with Yuri, but you… you… why couldn’t he stop thinking about you?

Jungkook hurriedly brought his hand over his mouth, the memories of when he used to do this returning all too quickly. He’d always wished Yuri would touch him, but that was selfish. The fact that she was even spending time with him should be enough. Yet you had touched him, and he didn’t even have to ask? You were strange, but as selfish as it might sound, he liked it.

Jungkook let himself slide down the door, the pleasure his hand was bringing made his knees weak. As much as he wanted to deny it, he wanted you again. He wished you were here right now to help ease the ache in both places. Would you, considering everything that had happened?

Jungkook hurriedly tried to shake those thoughts out of his head. No, you were back on his desk in his office. You noticed he was upset and came over to comfort him and make him feel better in any way you could. Your lips were on his, he was kissing you again and—

Fuck.

Jungkook briskly let go to quickly spit in his hand before hastily going back to fisting his length. Faster, he needed to make himself cum as fast as possible. The shakes were getting worse. He felt horrible, a failure, a disappointment, every flick just made him feel so fucking disgusted in himself, but it hurt too much to stop.

You on his desk, how it felt to have your hand wrapped around him, how it felt to be inside you—

There it is.

Jungkook let his mind reminisce in as much detail as he could remember. How it felt to finally be inside you, the sounds you made, how wet, tight, and warm you were— so fucking good. He wanted you again so badly, it should be criminal. He was married and he already messed up once, yet he couldn’t stop thinking about it— you on the desk, your fucking sweet pussy wrapped around his aching length. 

Close, he was getting close.

Jungkook brought his other hand up to tightly hold it against his mouth once more. His moans were getting too loud and he feared Yuri would hear. He tried to speed it up even more. All he needed was a little longer. 

You, your hands, your lips, your warmth, your bunched-up skirt, your thigh-highs, your panties, your red lipstick smearing across his face. Oh. So close. 

And then, at last, the feeling deep down inside growing and growing until he finally spilled inside of you—

…

…

…

Wait… what?

Jungkook’s eyes suddenly shot open, the haunting darkness of the bathroom now an unwelcoming sight. An immediate, deep, visceral sense of panic and dread sunk in as he racked his brain in hopes he was overreacting or misremembering. 

Jungkook had tried to push the memories of that night as far away as possible over the last few days, but now that he was thinking about it properly…

That day… you both hadn’t used protection.

It’s not like he walked around with condoms, he had no need, but…

Suddenly the ache that seemed deafening became just a muffled, dull, fuzzy noise in the background as this realization dawned on him. 

How? How did he not realize you hadn’t used protection? No matter how needy he was with Yuri, he was always so careful in the rare times they went all the way. How did he fucking forget?!

Jungkook suddenly had the urge to run into a wall and hoped he would never wake up again. This entire week had already turned out to be one horrible nightmare. But as if his life wasn’t shitty enough before, suddenly it took a whole new turn. 

The shaking came back and was worse than ever. He was at a point where he was sure he would scream his lungs out, but Yuri would hate the noise. Jungkook felt dazed, the realization was the quickest way to kill the mood, and the fastest he’d ever lost a boner. 

After a while, he somehow found the strength to stand up again and open the door to the bedroom. Yuri had turned off the lights here too. The only light coming in was from the few that were turned on in the hallway and Yuri’s phone playing some type of video. It also didn’t take long for him to see that she had fallen asleep.

For a split second, he was sad she wasn’t awake. He needed someone to talk to, even if that involved telling her about the affair. He felt like he was seconds away from losing his mind. He probably already had at this point. How could he fucking forget protection?!

Despite his shakiness, Jungkook went over to Yuri’s side— the right if you were facing the bed— and walked over to turn off her phone.

She had a makeup ASMR video playing. Those always helped her sleep and she said she could learn a few things from them while she was awake. As gently as he could, he also took out her headphones and set them on the nightstand. His hands had been shaking so badly that he could hardly pause the video for her.

But as Jungkook made his way to his side— the left— the weight of his actions became even more unbearable.

Jungkook lifted the covers and got in bed, laying face down on the pillow. The fabric was soaked by his tears in a matter of seconds. 

How could things just keep getting worse?

•────•──────────•────•

You knew it would be awkward when you came into work. It was inevitable, considering what things were like the last time you saw each other. However, for your sake and Jungkook’s, you tried your best to ignore what had transpired and move on with your life, but that was easier said than done. 

The minute Jungkook dropped you off and you made it back up to your apartment, you were stuck in place as soon as you closed the door behind you. Time felt like it stood still and nothing around you moved, like space itself had stopped in order to greet you with an agonizing silence. It was to taunt you and let the thoughts of what you had just done fester, quickly gnawing away at your sense of self and your very being, leaving you to question the type of person you thought you were for your entire life. You couldn’t move, trying to process everything that happened. This couldn’t be real, right? 

This was Jeon Jungkook we’re talking about— the Jeon Jungkook who was the son of the CEO at the company you work at.

You pinched your arm so many times you were sure it was going to bruise in your attempt to wake yourself up. You were probably still fast asleep in your cozy bed, stuck in a dream that just wouldn’t end. Your sexual frustration had somehow managed to manifest into you dreaming about your late night meet-up with your boss ending with you sleeping together. All would be fine in the morning except for the fact you’d have to look him in the eye, knowing what your brain had conjured up the night before. It was embarrassing, but that honestly made more sense than everything being real and this night actually happening. 

You were sure you’d wake up at any moment, but your arm started to hurt, and you knew standing here probably wouldn’t do anything. You finally found the strength to move from the entryway and head to your room to start getting ready for bed. You showered, then laid down staring at your ceiling, just waiting for your eyes to shoot open and you’d see it was Tuesday, October 31st, all over again. 

Nothing… nothing happened. 

While the seconds ticked away, your hope was drowned out as you let your mind reminisce about what had happened earlier. The minute you opened the door, you could just see it on his face. He had looked so sad, a pain behind his eyes that made any sense of composure you maintained in front of him come crumbling down. You felt like you had to fix it. Your heart had nearly pounded out of your chest when you got close, holding your coats and his scarf. You didn’t know what you were thinking, pulling him close the way you did, but then his hands were on your waist, and— You flipped over, feeling your face grow warm. 

But that didn’t help whatsoever, because it was like a floodgate had opened, and now you remembered how his lips felt against yours, his hurried hands across your burning skin, and most of all, how his… You spent nearly the entire night tossing and turning, bouncing back and forth between your guilt and shame for somehow getting yourself involved in this situation, to Jungkook and his stupid…

There was a scary part of you that was selfish, one that wished you had invited him upstairs. It had been so long since you’d been in the arms of another human being, that you forgot how much better the experience was. You’d never had sex like that before— it was desperate and emotional in a way you still couldn’t comprehend. The way Jungkook had held onto you, with tears streaming down his face, kept you close. You felt it in the way he kissed you, pleaded for you, the way he touched you. The way he touched you… it had been so long. 

Your tossing and turning had stopped at some point, your fight trying to get Jeon Jungkook out of your head had been lost, hard. The ache between your legs returned before you even realized, and no matter what you did, you couldn’t stop imagining the way his body felt against yours, his fingers inside you, or the slick glides of his cock through your wetness. 

It was just Jeon Jungkook no matter how hard you tried to close your eyes. You were too tired to fight against your hand traveling down into your shorts, and you nearly cried feeling how wet you were. It was a low moment, the entire night had been a low moment for you, but you let the thoughts fully consume you as your fingers glided between your soaked folds and settled on your clit, rubbing needy circles over the bud that was still a little sensitive from earlier. It was a horrible realization, but that just made your deluded self even more hot. It had been real.

You pictured him, you pictured the night you shared, you pictured the nights you didn’t share where he was just existing in your vicinity. You had no idea this part of you existed, the one where you thought Jeon Jungkook was so hot he could get you this riled up. You had known he was attractive, you had eyes, but the emotions had never let you see him like… that. The soft candle glow that had painted him so prettily, the way his sparkling eyes would look at you, how much you enjoyed the way he looked at you.

“Jungkook…” You whined with seemingly no shame. It was embarrassing, but you had never finished so fast with just your fingers. For a split second, as the bliss washed over you, you found yourself wishing he was here and questioning why of all people he had to be married. But as the high washed over you, all that was left in its wake was the starkness of shame. The guilt you felt as you tried bringing yourself back to earth. You had slept and now masturbated to a married man… Jungkook had a wife, and he was your boss. You thought you were better than this. 

Your eyes had filled with tears, and you spent the rest of the night crying your eyes out because what was wrong with you? You might have just ruined a family— your boss’s family, and who knows what might happen to you career-wise if someone were to find out.

You didn’t really sleep that night; you highly doubted you even got an hour before your alarm went off, and you had to get ready. That day was awful. As you expected yesterday, both Solmi and Taehyung didn’t come into work, probably too drunk from their night of fun to realize their alarms even went off. There was some part of you that was glad they weren’t here. You had been debating all night if you should tell your close friends about your night, but their absence was enough to remind you of your words to Jungkook last night.

It was a mistake, a fluke, it shouldn’t have happened, and you wouldn’t tell another soul so you both could easily pretend like nothing occurred that night. And seeing Jeon Jungkook again… 

Jimin had told you that Jungkook was going to be coming in late, and you couldn’t help the terror that spread throughout your body picturing why that might be. Your mind had drifted to the image of him on his knees begging his wife for a second chance, or maybe she’d kicked him out of the house, or maybe she was going to come after you for ruining their marriage. It felt like every scenario had run through your head by the time you had made it to the meeting room, waiting on him. 

You weren’t prepared at all when you glanced up from your computer at the sound of the door opening, for you to see him again. Your eyes met from across the room, and there was a second, a painful second where your minuscule amount of hope last night had just been a horny delusion that you could simply chastise your brain for making up later, died faster than you would have wanted. You could see it in the way his brows furrowed at you as soon as he met your eyes, that you knew last night had happened. 

He looked really good too… He was in a navy suit, missing a tie, instead a few buttons were undone, and his long hair messily fell around his face in a way that made him look ethereal. He looked like he had run his hands through it one too many times, yet somehow it just made him seem even more perfect. You swore you heard the pearly gates calling your name, the church bells sing, and… You wanted to scream. What were you thinking?! Immediately you decided to just try your best to ignore it, pushing him away was your only option in hoping things went back to normal— they needed to go back to normal. He had a wife, you had your career, you had to pretend it never happened. 

That’s how it needed to be after all. That day was a mistake; it shouldn’t have happened. The more you pretended it was that way, the easier it would be to move past this, the more you could forget, and the quicker things would go back to normal. But deep down, when you were alone, or you’d see him again— doing that was much harder than it needed to be. 

That night would come back to you in a flash. You’d wonder if he was doing okay, was he thinking about the night like you were, or were you just another girl he added to his roster of infidelity? You highly doubted it, just seeing the state he was in you didn’t think this was a normal occurrence, but who knows. There was some part of you that wanted to ask, however you had to keep your distance— at least, that’s what you kept telling yourself. You knew it was a little rude to almost flat-out ignore him like that, but addressing it would create an even bigger issue. So mean, rude, standoffish Y/n it was then. 

You could still feel his eyes on you anytime you were near each other. Part of you wanted to say something, but for some reason, you could never find it in yourself to tell him to stop staring. You were still mad. This whole thing made you angry and you knew your friends could sense the tension. Everyone in the office could but they probably didn’t question why. They all still thought you hated him after all.

You did… didn’t… you…? It was confusing then and ten times more confusing now. Still though, you tried to keep to yourself and ignore what happened. You thought you were doing a good job of it until you got an email that Friday.

From Director Jeon Jungkook,

can we talk??

It was informal, nothing about work was mentioned, and it was all too familiar with the Jungkook you had met during your late-night rendezvous… meeting! Yes, you were only there for one reason that night, and it was to get things ready for the budget presentation. Maybe this was his attempt at trying to be more comfortable with you. He did say all the formalities felt weird considering you were the same age. That had to be it!

As much as you wanted to delude yourself, deep down you knew whatever he emailed you for had something to do with that night. 

You let him know you’d come over during your lunch break, resisting the urge to tell him you didn’t want to talk about it. But you figured it had to be at least somewhat important for him to reach out. It better be. What part of pretending nothing happened between you two did he not understand?

That’s how you found yourself making your way through the halls to Jeon Jungkook’s office. You tried to be as inconspicuous as you could, turning every corner with ease and looking around anytime you’d hear footsteps behind you. Just being in the same vicinity made you feel like someone would find out what you both did.  

Your brain had rationalized that being seen together would surely be the obvious sign to everyone that you fucked your boss a few days ago. It made no sense whatsoever, you knew that, but still, you made sure to be as stealthy as you could on your way over.

You hoped no one saw you, and you were especially grateful when you passed Secretary Yu’s desk and she wasn’t there either. If you could make this quick, no one would realize you were ever here. 

Staring at the door, you found your heart beating out of control at the thought of facing him again. You knew you weren’t ready for this, you probably would never be, but it was still so soon after it happened…

It took you a second, but eventually you found the strength to knock before pushing open the door.

You were greeted by a similar sight as last time. His office was almost completely dark. He had kept the lights off and closed the blinds so only a sliver of light was peering into the room through the cracks. You could only make out a vague outline, but as your eyes adjusted to the darkness, you could finally make out Jungkook sitting at his desk. You could see his hands were in his hair, and the more closely you listened, the more you could hear his soft sniffles. Your first instinct was to run over to see what was going on, but you refrained as you steadily made your way over, only narrowly avoiding any furniture in the way. 

“Jungkook?” You called out, your heart nearly speeding out of your chest.

“Y/n…?” His voice sounded so strained.

“Yes, it’s me.” You tried to keep your tone flat, but it wavered slightly as you got closer.

With the confirmation it was you, Jungkook reached over to the lamp on his desk and finally turned on the light. You were shocked to see how disheveled he looked once the warm glow of the lamp hit his features. His hair looked like he had run his hands through it way too many times, his eyes were shot, his face was red, and tears stained his cheeks. 

Seeing him like this, it was hard to keep up your tough exterior. You quickly made your way over to his desk, keeping a notable distance between you two— standing behind the chairs sitting in front of his desk. You feared what might happen if you got any closer. 

“Um, you asked to speak with me.” This is how you’d usually talk whenever he’d call you to his office. Part of you was still holding onto the hope that this was just work related. 

You watched as a whole new wave of emotion seemingly hit Jungkook, fresh tears falling from his eyes as his hands returned to his hair. 

“I—um— I know we said we weren’t going to talk about that night, but… um—” Jungkook tried his best to be firm about this, but his whole world felt like it was coming down. He couldn’t sleep last night thinking about having this conversation with you, and now that you were here, it all felt too real.

“… I don’t remember using protection that night.” Jungkook was only able to meet your gaze for a second, long enough to see the look of shock on your face.

A whole new wave of guilt washed over him. This was all his fault.

“I know I didn’t have condoms with me, and unless you did and I didn’t realize you put one on, then…” Jungkook looked like he was pleading with you to tell him he forgot, that he was just so out of it he didn’t realize you had put one on some time in between. He had no reason to carry any with him personally. It’s not like he was expecting Yuri to fuck him in a place where he’d need to have them on him at all times— hell, they hardly used the condoms they kept at the apartment. Jungkook had never even managed to make it through a whole box without needing to replace them first because they’d expired. 

Still though, they were always so careful whenever they had sex. Jungkook spent the entire night mind-boggled at how he could have been so careless with you. And now, because he couldn’t control himself, there was a chance he might have ruined both of your lives. His own life was already shit, but now he might be bringing you down with him. He already had, but somehow the pit only grew deeper.

You sighed at the question— slightly relieved this was going to be easy to answer. 

“Don’t worry.” You remained apathetic, not exactly the emotional breakdown he expected considering the gravity of the situation. All night Jungkook had pictured that the minute he’d tell you, you would scream and curse at him for being so careless. It was almost uncanny how calm you were in comparison. You used the exact same tone whenever you’d talk to him about work, in the office when you had a quick question, or in front of the prying eyes of your nosy coworkers, like it was the most nonchalant thing ever. 

While your words were soothing, he couldn’t calm down quite yet.

“I’m on birth control, so as long as you’re clean we should be fine.” It took a minute for your words to register, but an immediate flush came to his cheeks. He completely forgot about birth control or that ever being a possibility of the invisible contraceptive he had prayed all night for. He felt even more embarrassed that he hadn’t considered you had some type of plan that night. Of course, you were smart, you wouldn’t let someone so pathetic ruin your life.

You watched his face, and you were honestly delighted to see a slight look of relief quickly settle over his soft, saddened features. You tried your best to hide it.

“Oh— I’m sorry. Of course you thought about it— good. We should be good then.” His voice was shaky, and while his words said one thing, he still seemed stressed for some reason as his hands were quickly back in his hair. 

Again, you had to resist the urge to ask him if he was ok. Distance, you had to keep this boundary up. You needed to get out of here.

“If you’re concerned about the other issue, I’ll make sure to pick up a morning-after pill or something on my way home just to ensure we’re fine,” you added, and he slowly nodded. Honestly, even if he hadn't said yes, you probably would have gone anyway just to be safe. You should have done it sooner, but you completely forgot about that detail while trying to push Tuesday out of your mind. 

“It’s up to you…” He mumbled, but he still seemed off. You had to get out of here.

“If that’s all then, I’ll be on my way sir—” You bowed, trying to be as polite as possible, before turning around and heading for the door.

“Wait!” You couldn’t even take two steps before he was calling you back. You visibly tensed up as you slowly turned around. You were greeted with his shiny brown eyes finally meeting your own for the first time since you walked in. Suddenly you felt your knees start getting weak. There was no reason for him to look at you like that.

“Don’t leave… that’s not all I wanted to say…” You could see in the way he looked at you that this was going to be the conversation you feared when you walked in. You resisted the urge to mention that you both agreed not to speak about it, but instead you just crossed your arms, ready to listen.

“I— um… I owe you a major apology…” He stumbled and his hands were back in his hair.

“That night— I don’t know what was wrong with me— it shouldn’t have happened, you were right.” He stopped for a second, and you wondered what he was trying to get at. What more was there to say? It really shouldn’t have happened.

“But…” Jungkook’s voice wavered as he looked up at you. “I’m even more sorry that despite how wrong I know it was I—” he took a deep breath “I can’t stop thinking about that night.” He truly felt bad. Here he was, trying his best to put his mistake behind him, yet all it did was fill his thoughts. Where was the guilt? Why wasn’t he so ashamed that just the thought of you was enough to remind him of what he’d done?

He saw your hard expression falter for a second, but it was back before he even realized. Jungkook felt like he was at his wits end. Everything was crashing down, and he didn’t have much to lose at this point. 

“And now all I can think about is…” tears quickly filled his eyes knowing what he was about to say “— how I want to do it again so, so badly… it had never felt that good before.” It was a sad, deep, dark confession that he hated as soon as it came out of his mouth. Admitting it was nice was one thing, but wanting to do it again was another.

Maybe you could excuse that night as a one-time thing— he was a mess, you both had some wine, and shit happened before you both could even realize. It was nonsense, Jungkook didn’t drink nearly enough to say he was acting against his own volition, and it wasn’t a spur-of-the-moment decision either. He had thought about having you against every surface in the office before anything actually happened. He’d wanted you nearly as long as you’d worked here.

Jungkook finally had to look away from you as his words settled in the air.

“Jungkook… you know what continuing, even just acknowledging what happened— you know what that would mean…?” You were honestly baffled and you hated the way your heart nearly beat out of your chest at the mention of it.

“Yes.” It was so quiet, and with the faint glow of his lamp you could see a new wave of tears start running down his cheeks. 

“That night— it was all my fault...” His voice was shaky just thinking about it. 

“I told you that I’m in an arranged marriage and that things are rough right now… it’s my fault, everything is my fault.” It certainly was.

“Despite the circumstances we got married in, we both agreed to try to make our relationship work, and I’ve just kept messing things up no matter how hard I tried to make her happy.” It’s been nearly four years and he could probably count on one hand the number of times he’d made her smile.

“She hates me, and I don’t blame her at all— I honestly deserve it and more.” He deserved far worse at this point.

“Why would your wife hate you?” You couldn’t help but ask, but you regretted it as soon as it left your mouth. The fact you had somehow found yourself in this situation proved that something wasn’t right. But the question had bounced around in your head for the past few days, wondering what might be splitting the couple to the point Jungkook sought you out for relief.

He looked at you for a split second. “I don’t know how to be a good husband. No matter what I do, I don’t know how to make her happy like I should.” He attested with a level of pain in his voice that you weren’t prepared for. 

“Jungkook…” You were speechless… a deep, unsettling, uneasy feeling spread throughout your body as you listened. You had zero insight into the situation, but despite everything, it felt wrong to hear him be so down on himself. It was heartbreaking to listen to.

“I don’t think you deserve to be hated—” You tried to console, but Jungkook stopped you before you could finish.

“No… she deserves a better husband— a different one— someone who can make her happy, and I should just… just disappear— I can’t do anything right.” He tried to laugh but it just came out like a pained sob. It wasn’t funny and he couldn’t even pretend to laugh at that anymore.

“Jungkook—”  You called out again, but he stopped you in your tracks. 

“I hope you believe me when I say that that night was the first time something like that happened.” His shiny eyes looked up at you again, and you could have broken down right then and there. The pain, you could see it so clearly.

“I despise cheating and the fact that— that— that night happened, I just—” He couldn’t be more disappointed in himself. He’d forever tainted his marriage, just like his parents had done.

Even if Yuri never found out, the fear of her somehow discovering what he did one day… the guilt would kill him. Their anniversary was coming up in a few months— how could he look her in the eyes and relive the moments of their wedding day knowing he betrayed their vows, her trust, knowing that she had every reason to leave him?

Maybe one day he could finally get his shit together and Yuri could love him the way he’d always dreamed, but that would all come crashing down one day when she somehow found out what he did. 

Jungkook at least thought he was above that. The one thing he knew he could promise Yuri was that he’d always be by her side, faithfully and earnestly, yet he’d found a way to fuck that up too.

There really was no happy ending for him, was there?

“I’m sorry— it shouldn’t have happened, and I feel horrible bringing you into my mess.”

You wanted to say that you were equally to blame, but Jungkook was faster.

“And— and I just… I’m sorry— we agreed to try and move on from this but I just can’t stop thinking about you and that night and—” It wasn’t even funny how much he thought about you. Right before you walked in, he had the lights off to hide his shame because even in the middle of what he thought was a crisis, all he could think about was you on his desk. And seeing you now standing in front of him…

“I’m sorry…” Jungkook just cried. He really didn’t have the words to describe how he felt right now. 

“I spoke to a therapist about it.” Jungkook could instantly see the slight panic on your face at the mention of him telling someone about this. “I took your advice from that night about talking to someone. I really wasn’t in a good place at all, and if I hadn’t, I think I might have gone crazy. He was supposed to help me and Yuri with the issues in our marriage, but he’s helped me with more than just my relationship. Don’t worry. Yuri won’t find out.” Jungkook had full trust that the doctor wouldn’t tell Yuri about the affair. Even though their conversation wasn’t protected by doctor-patient confidentiality, he still knew the doctor wouldn’t say anything. He was expecting that Jungkook was going to tell her on his own time. 

You were a little taken aback by the news, but your memory of that night was clear. You knew when you parted ways that he really didn’t seem okay. The fact that it was a therapist he confided in made you relax a little.

“I went to him for a slap on the face, but instead he said— he said I should consider stepping away from Yuri for a little while and take the time to try and figure out what I want in life. But I can’t— I want her, and I want to make our marriage work somehow.” Jungkook was in tears again. He didn’t want to give up on his marriage yet. He couldn’t give up, so many people were counting on him to make this work.

“But I can’t think straight. I’m always so frustrated and you’re always in my head— I know I could be better— it’s not an excuse, I should be better, but—” What was he even saying?

“That night was— it never felt that good before— you were there for me, and despite how much of a mess I was, you—” Why? The question had never run through his head until now, but what could have possibly been your reason for being there with him that night? You were too nice. His thoughts were running a million miles an hour. He honestly couldn’t think clearly anymore.

“And your clothes— I’m sorry about that, I’m so sorry— it had— it had been ten months since I last, you know… but that’s not an excuse. I’m sorry, I should have been better.” He should have been. Imagine how disappointed Yuri would be if she knew. 

“Ten months?” This conversation had gone all over the place, but you couldn’t hide your shock at this piece of news. You had just let him rant, not wanting to interrupt to give him the chance to get whatever he needed off his chest, but you just couldn’t hide your reaction. 

Ten months was certainly not normal, especially considering he was married and had no kids to take up his free time after work. Suddenly, things started making a little more sense.

“It’s my fault— it’s all my fault— I’m not a good husband, I should have been able to wait longer if I had to— or maybe she would have wanted me sooner if I was better.” If he was better he wouldn’t have been in this situation in the first place. 

There were some things that Jungkook said that made your skin crawl. It was possible his whole spiel could be some convoluted way into excusing what happened between you two, but then he said statements like that that would make alarm bells go off in your head. That certainly wasn’t right. 

“But I want to be better. I want to make things right, and I just feel like I can’t do that when all I can think about is—” Jungkook didn’t finish, instead letting a pained sigh say everything he couldn’t. 

“And I know it’s pathetic, but I wanted your help—” There it was, what’s been on his mind since that night. “Maybe you could tell me what I could do better— how to make her happy, what I’m lacking. And I just can’t stop thinking about you—” He looked up at you with those shiny, round eyes that made it so hard to say no.

And there it was, exactly what you feared when you walked in. 

So much was happening, so many emotions thrown at you that you were tempted to take a seat in the chair in front of you to sit down and process it all. You tried your best to remove all emotion from this, to look at this as objectively as you could, but with Jungkook right in front of you and hearing everything he said—

You knew something was wrong from the minute you walked into your first meeting together, but you could have never predicted just how bad things were. You had no idea what went on behind closed doors. Maybe things really might be as bad as Jungkook said, but the hurt, pain, and desperation he spoke with made the wall you tried putting up impossible to keep from crashing down.

It took you back to Mi-Sun once again. You remembered talking to her in class sometimes and how she would spin every inconvenience into her doing. She always emphasized how it was her fault the other girls would tease her as much as they did. You didn’t understand it then, but Jungkook’s admissions almost felt like a repeat of what happened all those years ago, and you knew how that story ended.

“It’s my fault.” She had said so aimlessly as she stared out the window you both sat by.

“How is it your fault?!” You’d questioned, maybe a little too harshly. You couldn’t believe her words, considering you knew she had never done anything wrong. The girls were rude, you had no idea why, but Mi-Sun had been their target since you both made it to high school. 

She should have known this, and it just made you angry. “They’re the problem, they have always been the problem. They’re rude just because they can be, and for some reason, no one is doing anything to stop it, and—”

“Y/n, just look at me!” You had turned to your friend, her eyes teary, and you should have seen it sooner. “It’s all my fault.” She softly cried before you pulled her into your arms. 

You didn’t see it then, and the way Jungkook spoke now made you feel like you were back in high school, in class, right by the window you both would always sit by as Mi-Sun stared out, the light shining in her eyes growing dimmer as each day passed. 

“Jungkook… you know what continuing would mean…” You looked at him worriedly.

You saw the tears run down his cheeks again as he slowly nodded his head. 

“If anyone were to find out about that night, we could maybe just say we had too much to drink, it was late, or you could even mention your breakdown. Doing anything more would truly turn this into cheating. We’d have no excuses at that point.” Your eyes were sad as you noticed his expression grow more pained.

“And since you’re still trying to make things work with your wife— I just don’t think that’s the smartest idea. If we leave things where they’re at now, it would give us our best chance of going back to normal and putting the whole thing behind us.” 

You could see the consequences coming from a mile away. You knew there would only be trouble going forward. You certainly weren’t a homewrecker by any means. You didn’t want to be the reason things came crashing down.

Jungkook steadily nodded.

“I probably look pathetic right now— I’m sorry, I don’t want you to think I’m forcing you or anything considering—” Jungkook was your boss… or well, technically your boss’s boss, but the dynamic was still a little strange. It was all strange. This whole situation was strange. 

But it felt like you were with Mi-Sun all over again. You didn’t see the signs then, but Jungkook was right in front of you. You had the chance to help someone in a way you couldn’t help your friend in high school. What might happen if you just walked away from this now? A repeat? Or maybe something even worse. 

“You don’t look pathetic, and I know you’re not forcing me… it’s just… things are going to get really complicated if we decide to do this.”

The vagueness of your statement was intentional— it’s not like you were saying no, because you weren’t. You really didn’t want to get involved in this, but seeing Jungkook so low… You didn’t think he was pathetic, however hearing him rant like this was just painful. Things weren’t right, and finding out your night together made him feel even the slightest bit better made you want to help him in any way you could. You hated seeing the dark cloud storming over him and his sad, tired gaze anytime you’d meet his eyes. It was difficult to watch, and as reckless as it was, you wanted to do anything to take away his pain just like you had wished you could’ve taken Mi-Sun’s pain away.

Jungkook visibly picked up on the fact that you didn’t outright say no, and part of you hated seeing the glimmer of hope in his eyes. This really was a bad idea to even entertain the idea of continuing, but at the same time, it was nice to see his gloom wash away, if only for a second. But that moment only lasted for a second before his expression suddenly changed into something darker, somehow even more disturbed.

“I promise I'll be good.” It was an odd choice of words that immediately caught you off guard. 

“I’ll stay in line, I won’t ask for anything in return. I’ll wait until you want me. I promise I’ll be good, I promise.” It was his last-ditch effort to convince you. He was almost pleading with you. You couldn’t help but look at him strangely, wondering what he meant by that.

“I’ll be good— I have to be good— I don’t want to disappoint you either.” Things had truly taken a turn. Jungkook's expression grew more pained by the second, the cloud that hovered around him stormed with a concerning ferocity. 

“I’ll be good— I promise— I promise I’ll wait.” Jungkook was slipping off an edge you didn’t see coming. The tears so easily slipped past his eyes, an uneasiness behind his desperate gaze. For some reason, you knew deep down this wasn’t coming from nowhere, especially after hearing his rant earlier…

“What do you mea—” But you couldn’t finish your sentence. The wave had already come crashing down over him, and you saw Jungkook fall to pieces first-hand. Even in the subtle light, you could see he was shaking.

“I’ll wait, I’ll wait if you want me to— as long as you need me to— I’ll be good— I promise!” He looked you in the eye, but for some reason you felt like he was looking right through you.

“I don’t want to disappoint you— I’ll be good— I have to be good— I have to— I’ll wait— I promise I’ll wait!” This had turned into a full-blown meltdown. You could see it in the look in his eyes. Something was on his mind, and it was tearing him apart. As much as you wanted to remain as neutral as possible, you couldn’t just stand there anymore and watch this. You quickly made your way around his desk so you were standing right beside him. His hands were back in his hair and his rambling had nearly turned incoherent.

In the low light you could see his hands trembling, and you quickly had to stop the tears from pouring out at that point. You couldn’t imagine what he must have gone through to make him so upset. If this was all a ruse then he deserved to be in Hollywood, but even suggesting that this might be a trick just felt beyond cruel. He was clearly struggling…

“Jungkook— please— please look at me.” You tried to remain calm, but your voice wavered in the middle.

“I’ll be good!” You could barely make his words out through the sobs. 

“Jungkook… please look at me…” You gently tapped him on the shoulder. You were a little calmer this time, and that finally had him turning to face you, breaking him out of his trance.

He was finally looking up at you with his big, round, sad eyes, and your heart nearly broke in two when you saw his lip quiver slightly. He seemed so innocent, yet so broken, and you just wanted to fix him somehow.

You brought your hand up to lightly cup his cheek— they were wet, so, so wet, and as you moved his hair out his face, you could feel the tips had grown damp. Tears steadily continued to pour onto your fingers, but you tried your best to wipe them away. You also didn’t miss the way he practically careened into your warmth.

Such a pretty boy shouldn’t cry like this.

“I’ll wait…” He muttered as he looked at you. This time you knew he was talking to you.

“What do you mean you’ll wait?” You asked gently as you continued to wipe the tears from his eyes.

“As long as you need me to… weeks, months, years. I’ll wait until you want me.” Something about the way he said this, the pain in his voice made it that much more heartbreaking. Weeks were already crazy, but months, years? For some reason, the strain in the way he said this along with what he mentioned earlier, made you think this went deeper than his breakdown.

“I’ll be good, I promise— I’ll wait— I can’t disappoint you too.” He sobbed into your hands. Too? No, this wouldn’t do.

“Jungkook, what do you want?” You asked, looking him directly in the eyes. Your question visibly confused him at first, which just made you feel bold enough to go a step further. You looked toward the door before looking back down at him. 

“Are you expecting anyone here any time soon?” 

Confusedly, he shook his head. “It’s lunch right now— Secretary Yu went out to get something to eat and I don’t have any appointments.”

At this news, you let go of his pretty face and grabbed the end of your skirt. It was tight, so you pulled it up slightly before taking a seat right on his lap. You paid close attention to the look on his face, and you saw the panic before you felt it. His confusion turned into worry as he looked down at where you were sitting. He knew you could feel it, a surprise you had not expected when you sat down. 

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’ll wait, I promise!” He seemed panicked as he looked at you. His hands hovered over your waist, too scared to push anything further.  He said he’d wait, but he was hard underneath you.

Jungkook’s thoughts had been filled with you even before you walked in. They always were whenever he was in his office these days, the memories returning so vividly as he’d stare at his desk where it happened. 

“I can wait, I promise!” He tried to defend, but his brain was already starting to get fuzzy just from having you on his lap. 

“Jungkook, what do you want?” You asked again, wrapping your arms around his neck. He was tense, but you felt him momentarily grab ahold of your waist and pull you a little closer. It would be so easy to kiss him like this.

“I…” His eyes struggled to meet your own. You were so close. He wanted to look and touch everywhere, but he had to think about you. 

“I want to be good— I promise I’ll wait—” He had tears in his eyes as he stared down at where your bodies met. 

“Mmm…. Is that so?” You looked down and you wondered what he meant about waiting. Clearly he needed something now, you could feel it right underneath you. 

Jungkook shakily nodded.

“Until you want me, I’ll wait.” For a second, you ran his proposed arrangement through your head. What kind of affair would that be? Not that you thought about it before, but who’s ever heard of an affair where the guy is at the beck and call of the person he’s cheating with?

It was even more reason to believe he really hadn’t done anything like this before. Something wasn’t right.

“But what do you want?” Again, you asked because you wanted to hear it, but you felt like he needed to say it to himself even more. You could almost see the fear in his eyes as your question lingered. You could feel him shaking underneath you, and you couldn’t help but wonder what he was thinking about… or who.

“To be good…” His eyes only met yours for a second before they trailed down your body. His words were saying one thing, but his eyes were telling you another. Maybe you should help him out a little.

When you started getting closer, Jungkook thought you were going to kiss him. Maybe he wished you did, but what you ended up doing was even more unexpected. Your face grazed past his own and suddenly your lips were brushing against his neck. 

“Oh…” Jungkook felt his cheeks warm, and his hands were gripping your waist before he could stop them. 

You didn’t tease him for long, instead planting gentle, light, feathery kisses along his burning skin. His brain was shot the minute you stepped close, but like this, he was fighting so hard to stop himself from pulling you closer. You felt so good against him, so good, and it was already so hard.

“Y/n…” It came out like a whine and he didn’t mean it to. His eyes were watery, it hurt so much.

“Mhmm” Your voice was soft and—

“Y/n— I’ll wait— I promise, but I’m weak, and please— if you don’t want this… just please go easier on me.” Jungkook finally just cried. This was Yuri all over again. He didn’t want to disappoint you too, not another person. He didn’t need another person to hate him.

“But what about what you want?” You scooted closer, inches away from where he wanted you the most. He thought this would be the moment you’d get off, where you’d tell him to stop crying and scold his very existence. But you didn’t.

Your kisses slowed and you lingered on his skin for longer, lightly sucking spots you somehow discovered were sensitive. Jungkook gripped your hips hard, and he couldn’t stop himself from rutting up into you. It hurt so much, and Jungkook wanted nothing more than to touch you. This was just cruel.

“Y/n…” Jungkook cried, unable to stop the tears from spilling over.

You pulled back enough to see his face. You saw the tears and quickly leaned forward to kiss his cheek. He stared at you wide-eyed, still with that pained look on his face.

“Jungkook, you keep asking what I want, but I want to hear from you. What do you want?” You asked again, softly. You were pressing buttons he didn’t know he had. Why were you being so cruel?

A choked sob left his lips as he held onto your waist tightly. He couldn’t do this, he couldn’t do this. 

Like you were sensing his struggle, you leaned in again and started planting languid kisses along his neck. He didn’t have much resilience anyway, paper-thin might even be an exaggeration with the way he was feeling. You were too close and he was too needy, the days of longing making it impossible to think straight, to resist like he knew he should.

“Y/n…” It came out as a moan as you subtly moved your hips against him. This was a warning, a warning that you clearly ignored because your pace grew faster with each glide of your hips.  Tears poured harder from his eyes.

“Do you want me to stop?” You asked when he still hadn’t said anything. 

Jungkook felt his body react faster than his mind did. His arms came up and tightly wrapped around your frame. The thought of you leaving when he felt like he was seconds away from exploding made him panic. 

You were pulled flush against his chest before you could even realize.

“I want you so bad— it hurts so much— please don’t leave me.” He sounded exasperated. He was shaking around you as you could feel the tears running down his face and hitting your cheek.

Shame washed over him as his words settled in the air. He was begging. How sad and pathetic he must have looked. He was all too sure that he’d already ruined things with you. 

You seemed to sense he was spiraling, so you were quick to press gentle kisses up his neck, across his jawline, and steadily made your way across his cheek to settle right beside his quivering lips. 

His sniffling grew quieter as you worked. Instead, soft moans that he was trying to hold back grew stifled and needier. When you made it to his lips, there was a moment of hesitation. But it was truly only for a moment as Jungkook didn’t allow for anymore, finally closing the distance between you.

It happened so fast, you both nearly bumped heads at the speed he moved, and you weren’t prepared for how vigorous his kiss was. Jungkook kissed you like his life depended on it, and in some sense, you feared it really did. 

You were quick getting into it though, matching his rhythm until your lips were moving together in sync. It just felt so right. 

That same warmth Jungkook felt deep down in his chest on that fateful night was back with an overwhelming force. He could have cried— scratch that, he was crying, but for an entirely different reason. 

Your lips were so soft, and with your arms wrapped around him… for a second, all the pain washed away. There was no one else in the world, no worries, it was just you and him together, alone in his office. This felt right in every way possible, and he couldn’t get you close enough. 

The kiss was wet, hot, and you were so needy your body felt like it might burst into flames within a split second. It was destructive and consumed you both so quickly that you had no chance of coming to your senses. This was a bad idea, but you’d think about that later. Instead, you eagerly ground down onto him, making him softly moan into your lips. 

His hands rested on your waist, and you could feel his fleeting attempts to touch you more, but it was like something was holding him back. You pulled away and he really was too pretty, your lipstick was all over his face, his lips shiny and stained red.

“Do you want this?” He suddenly asked, out of breath. For a second his question didn’t even register, because what?

“I don’t… I don’t want you to think I’m forcing you into this. I’ll wait, you could even walk away entirely if you aren’t comfortable doing this.” He spoke with round, sad eyes like he really was concerned. But you could still feel him throbbing underneath you. How he was this hard over a little teasing… you honestly worried for his pants at how well you could feel his aching length. 

“Jungkook…” You sighed, lifting your hand to move his messy bangs away from his eyes. You could see his face a little better and it hurt seeing how red it was, stained with tears, and a sad look behind his dark gaze. 

You leaned forward, pressing a light kiss to his cheek before moving your lips right by his ear. 

“Would I be in your lap otherwise?” So soft and sultry in his ear. And he moaned, not holding back at all, completely forgetting you both were still in a public setting. He could have cum just from that alone. But he didn’t care, he was seconds away from losing his mind if something didn’t happen soon.

And then you were back to peppering kisses along his neck, this time going full force at sucking at the skin. 

“Ahhh! Y/n— please!” He hissed, letting the tears fall from his eyes. He was going to explode, he was going to explode, please, please just touch him. 

Jungkook didn’t wait for you to progress things further. He couldn’t find it in himself to be patient. Instead, his hands quickly moved down your waist, the arch of your back, and settled onto the curve of your ass, groping and feeling with a hurried need. 

The motion made you gasp, easily allowing him to slip his tongue inside. It was completely unexpected, especially considering how timid he’d been acting so far, you definitely weren’t prepared. He was the one in control now. It was his tongue that was exploring every inch of your mouth fervently. It was hot and heavy, with a desperation you hadn’t felt since you were a teenager. Your hands cupped his cheeks before tightly tangling in his hair, somehow trying to pull him closer. It was this antsy, erupting feeling. You both hidden away from the world while you tried your best to contain yourselves in a public setting. You could feel his excitement through his suit pants which he tried to hide while pulling you closer at the same time. 

“Oh fuck.” He softly moaned into the kiss as your hands found their rightful place in his long, dark hair. You pulled and tugged on the strands, enjoying the soft whines of pleasure Jungkook let out underneath you. 

It was happening so fast, yet not fast enough. Any time you attempted to pull away, he held you closer in his arms. It was hard to keep up, but you weren’t prepared for the heat to consume you so quickly, you felt like you were doused in gasoline. It was insane, and you wanted so much more with each brush of his lips against yours.

You were so in the moment that you weren’t prepared for his hands to go lower, slipping under your skirt to hastily pull it up around your waist. For a moment, it didn’t even register until you began to feel the cold breeze against the newly exposed skin. It was at this that you finally pulled away. 

For a brief moment, Jungkook tried to stop you, but then you felt the building confidence quickly leave his body as he realized something was wrong. He stared up at you, the shininess in his eyes returning all too quickly.

“I—I’m sorry…” His voice was shaking.

“Don’t apologize—”

“I’ll wait, I’m sorry. I’m rushing things, I’m sorry…” It’s like he wasn’t listening all over again as he shakily tried to pull your skirt back down. 

It was then that you realized how this might have looked. 

“It’s not that— it’s just… I know it’s a little hard to forget, but we’re in public… in your office.” You pointed out, and you saw Jungkook’s face grow red as he looked around. It seemed like he really did forget where you were.

“I’m sorry—” He cried, letting go of you entirely. 

“No— we don’t need to stop. Going all the way might not be the best idea, especially in a room without a lock, but I was thinking we could do something a little quicker.” You smiled gently at him. Jungkook was visibly confused at this, so you took this as your cue to slip off his lap and onto your knees right in front of him. 

“Will this work for you?” You smiled up at him mischievously, hoping he got the picture. But for some reason he still was staring down at you with those round eyes that made him look so innocent and… confused?

“What are you doing?” His voice was so small. Your hand was resting on his lap, so close to where he wanted you, and just— why did you have to get off of him?

It was your turn to be confused. 

“You know…” You lightly laughed, thinking this might be some type of joke, but Jungkook still maintained the same perplexed gaze. It was then that your face dropped. Suddenly the possibility of him actually being confused ran through your head.

“You do know what a blowjob is, right?” You were a bit blunt, but honestly you were expecting him to laugh at you. A funny joke in the heat of the moment to make you smile, but instead of the giggle you were expecting, you suddenly watched him get flustered.

“Right…?” You asked again, growing weary. 

“Uh— I do— did? I didn’t think they were a real thing people actually do…” His voice just grew smaller as he looked down at you. He quickly got the picture that wasn’t normal.

You immediately had so many questions. You were the same age, yet….? How, how did this happen? Did someone tell him that? No guy would ever think that without some type of influence. That also meant he probably wasn’t the most experienced, as far as partners go, because you highly doubt people came into his life and never once tried sucking his dick or at least offered. The other day Jungkook did mention he’s only been with his wife, and an uneasy shudder ran through your body as you mentally started connecting the dots. 

“Um— Jungkook, if you’re not comfortable, we could—” 

“No, please! Please don’t stop— I… please…” He cried, grabbing onto your hand that was sitting in his lap, but immediately he was horrified in himself, realizing he was begging again. Yuri always hated that so much. 

“I mean— I mean…” His eyes grew watery. “It just hurts so much…” Jungkook wanted to fuck you on top of his desk again, he was only a moment away from picking you up and doing just that. 

“If you’re comfortable, I won’t stop.” You gave him a warm smile, careful not to frighten or overwhelm him, along with a gentle, reassuring squeeze to his thigh to keep him relatively calm.

Jungkook subtly, but not so subtly, tried to move himself closer to your hand. He was hardly paying attention, his mind completely enthralled with needing some type of relief. He’d take anything at this point.

“Jungkook?” You questioned when he still hadn’t responded.

“P-Please…!” He stammered out, seeing how close your hand was. Just a little closer and he could…

You looked down and noticed his efforts, making you chuckle. “Alright then, I’ll be quick. Just let me know when you’re close.”

Again, he wasn’t paying as much attention as he should, but suddenly his eyes went wide as you lightly began running your hands up his thighs. Jungkook moaned at the touch as you ran over the very obvious outline in his slacks. Anything at this point felt so intense. He just needed more.

You were quick to give him just that. As you reached up to start undoing his belt, he finally had to look away, knowing what was coming next. 

You went a little slow, not to just tease him, but to give him a chance to turn back if he got uncomfortable at any moment. You were too fascinated by how tiny his waist looked to notice his growing panic.

Jungkook wanted to scream when you started to unzip his pants— he wanted more, but he was terrified. As he felt you pull him out from his underwear, his eyes grew watery, not needing to look down to feel your gaze. You were staring at him. 

Things were different from the last time. While he had the blinds closed and the lights were low, he knew there was still more than enough light to see him. A wave of anxiety washed over him faster than a tsunami, the dread of your judgment completely taking him out of the moment. He’d only been with two people before. The fear of it not looking right or not being up to your standards was still very real and alive. Maybe that was the reason Yuri didn’t want him, and you have probably experienced so much better— you deserve so much better than anything he could give you— 

His thoughts were spiraling, but you were quick to step in once again, noticing he’d grown tense underneath you. 

You directed your attention to his length that you had firmly grasped in your hand. You marveled at being able to see it in its full glory unlike last time. It was pretty and practically had you drooling, leaving you more than excited to see how it feels in your mouth. It was firm in your grasp and it curved slightly towards the flaming red tip, and you had to stop yourself from moaning at the delicious vein running along the side. 

You stared, maybe for too long, at the way it bopped at the slightest movements and gently started leaking precum onto your hand, steadily dripping to create a small puddle that ran down your skin. Staring wasn’t the right thing to do considering how self-conscious he seemed ,and it took you way too long to look up and see his attention on the ceiling with wet streaks running down his cheeks.

“You’re so pretty, don’t you know that?” You smiled as you slowly started to pump his length. The action was enough to make Jungkook look down at you, moaning at your words, and fuck— The sight was enough to send him to a new dimension and back. You had moved closer so your face was right by where he needed you, and you were touching him so well—

“Y/n…” It was a hushed sob. Any louder and he was scared he’d scream. His tears were now streaming for an entirely different reason. It was quick and all these emotions were swirling around in his head. It was too much and he wanted you to stop it.

Your strokes were slow, but it really didn’t take much. It had been too long, too much running away and edging; he just wanted relief.

“Y/n—” He cried again, this time more desperate. He was shaking.   

You put him out of his misery only slightly as you used your thumb to rub over the slit and marveled at the way more precum continued to leak over your finger with each swipe.

“Oh— fuck.” He whined, shifting around so you’d touch him more. His hands were balled into tight fists as he watched you, knuckles turning white in the process. Part of him wanted to look away in shame, but you commanded his attention in a way that he couldn’t turn anywhere else. 

You met his shameful gaze as you looked up at him with glistening eyes, and Jungkook hated how much he wanted to ruin you all over again. Leave you a mess so his colleagues could see how horrible he was. 

Jungkook was on edge and you had barely touched him. You could tell he was growing antsy, so you finally moved so that you were mere centimeters away from his pleading cock. The sight alone could have made him cum. You, staring up at him with eager, excited eyes, and as he looked down at you, a guttural sound escaped his lips before he could catch it. 

There was only a moment of hesitation, a moment that dragged on for eternity. With your gaze, you were waiting to see if he had any doubts about continuing, but Jungkook held on with bated breath, giving no signs of wanting to stop. 

He was a little confused… no, that wasn’t right… anxious? He hardly had a clue what to expect. He knew what a blowjob was… kinda? He knew what they were from videos he saw when he was younger, but everyone always talked about how exaggerated they were. He had no idea what a real blow job was like and what to expect. How long had it been since the thought even crossed his mind? He couldn’t remember anymore.

Jungkook was in his head again, but the very sudden feeling of your tongue quickly swiping across the tip briskly jolted him back into the moment, making him nearly jump out of his chair. 

Oh.

He didn’t even realize he had said it out loud, and at a volume that was far too loud, until the soft sounds of your chuckles got his attention. 

“Can’t be too loud~” You smiled, and Jungkook felt his whole body set ablaze with an inferno he wasn’t prepared for in the slightest. 

“Just let me know when you’re close—” you reminded him once again. He wondered if you could tell he wouldn’t last long. You would be right. “Sit back, relax. I’ll take care of you.” You smiled. 

Jungkook had to take a moment to stare at you. Your eyes shone from his desk lamp, your lipstick had already started to smear across your lips from your heated activities earlier, and your hair grew more disheveled by the second. Your invitation to relax and let you essentially take care of him made shivers run up his spine, and he couldn’t nod for you to continue any faster. 

He listened to your advice and finally leaned back in his office chair, waiting for you to have your way with him. The moment he got more comfortable, you were back on him, his cock in hand as you leaned in once again to give a teasing lick to the tip. 

Ohhhhhh—

He didn’t mean to, but you were teasing him too much. You probably thought it was pathetic how he practically chased after your mouth when you pulled away. It wasn’t long before you were back though, slowly swirling your tongue around the tip, tasting the salty precum that continued to leak with each swipe of your tongue, while looking intently at his antsy reactions.

“Ahhhh! Please—” Jungkook had tears in his eyes as he pleaded for you. He felt like he was going to lose his mind. This, fuck— this—

He probably had imprints on his hands from his nails at how tightly he had balled up his fists. Jungkook looked down at you, not wanting to rush you or beg, but he felt like he was at his limit.

Finally, you put him out of his misery. It came unexpectedly. Your gentle licks turned into you engulfing the tip with your mouth. You were slow. You didn’t want to overwhelm him considering this was meant to be his first time.

“Oh, fu—” Jungkook quickly covered his mouth. His fist tightened to the point he could feel his nails digging into his skin. His tears finally spilled as the overwhelming pleasure washed over him as you tried to take more of him down. It was new, a euphoria he had never experienced before, seeing you on your knees pleasing him, taking him so well… it was too sinful to be allowed. And you just kept going, further and further down and—

“Wai—oh my go—” Jungkook tried to whisper, but he was way too loud. He was going to cum. It was like he was suddenly pushed to the edge. He knew he was close, but not that close. 

“Oh—” He moaned. Your mouth was so warm, wet, and inviting. It reminded him too much of the fleeting memory of what it felt like to be inside you. Jungkook quickly had to shut his eyes, focusing all his concentration on not having this end so soon after you just started. The embarrassment— he couldn’t do that to you. But—

“Fuck!”

You went as far as you could before steadily easing back and popping off him to see how he took it. You knew he had been shaking, but you weren’t prepared for his look of distress. 

“You ok?” You lightly chuckle, caressing his thigh— and, woah, were you in for a surprise feeling how firm they were. How much did this boy work out?

You watched as tears slipped from his eyes. “Umm-mm-m,” his voice was shaky as he finally opened his eyes to look at you.

“Can— can you go slow? I won’t make it two seconds otherwise…” He was quiet and sounded out of breath already. His round cheeks were flushed and he could barely look you in the eye.

“It’s all about you. Don’t worry about it too much. Like I told you, sit back and relax. You can let go whenever you’re ready.” You smiled. All you wanted him to do was relax and enjoy it. He seemed so tense, he always seemed so tense. You couldn’t imagine what he must be going through for him to practically be in pieces, always on the verge of tears any time you’d just look at him.

Even now… You finally noticed his tightly balled fist, and he just seemed so tense— too tense for someone who was about to get sucked off. You quickly wrapped one hand around his length again and used the other to grab one of his fists and place it on your head. 

You didn’t want him to think too much, so you quickly took him into your mouth again. He must have understood what you meant because his hand was suddenly in your hair, and electricity ran through your body at the satisfying moan he let out. It was loud, almost like it was meant for anyone to hear. For a moment, you forgot you were in his office in the middle of everyone’s lunch break. That anyone could walk in at any time if you weren’t careful. It seemed you weren’t the only one. 

The moment was short-lived. Jungkook quickly brought his hand back over his mouth to stop himself from making any more noise. The moan caught in his throat was muffled, but you could still sense the urgency in his tone without hearing him fully.  

Each time you bobbed your head up and down, his reactions fueled you to push further. Jungkook was trying to be subtle, you could tell, and it was almost cute how soft he was. Your hand wrapped around his length to stroke whatever your mouth couldn’t take. He whimpered underneath you each time your lips came down around him, and you picked up on the cute way he lightly gripped your hair with each movement you made. It was so subtle, careful not to squeeze too hard, but you could feel when he wanted more.

Jungkook couldn’t even comprehend the emotions flowing through his body, all new sensations that made every touch you gave him feel so intense. He was barely making it as it was, but this was so new, and he just couldn’t—

“Y/n— I’m close…” He sobbed. He felt worse when you stopped momentarily to look at him because you had barely started. You were only a few strokes in and he had tried his best to push past and enjoy it as long as possible, but it was already too much, and—

“I’m sorry…” He cried, that creeping embarrassment washing over him with vigor. He was prepared for you to say something demeaning. Mocking that he could hardly last, that he was a disappointment, that you regretted doing this with him. He was ready for the painful words he’d grown so used to lately, but they never came as you popped off him with a smile. 

“Let go whenever you’re ready.” Your eyes were warm, and for a second he felt all fuzzy inside because it was more compassion than he deserved. 

He felt his eyes grow watery, but right before you were about to finish him off, a sound Jungkook recognized too well filled the emptiness of his office. The blaring ring of the phone that sat on his desk made you both freeze. In an instant, the thin veil you both wore over your eyes, shielding you from the outside world, was ripped away. 

You and Jungkook just stared at each other. An intense fear came over the both of you, but in the moment, Jungkook knew he had to act. He hurriedly tried to pull himself together enough so he could answer the call. With a worried glance sent in your direction, Jungkook slowly picked up the phone.

“H-Hello?” His voice cracked, the strain from all the crying earlier taking its toll at the worst time possible.

“Oh— sir, are you ok?” It was Secretary Yu. 

“Yeah— I’m fine. Is something up?” Jungkook rushed her. With the reassurance it was just his secretary and not an executive, an uncontrollable anger started boiling over at something coming in the way of his relief…

“I’m sorry to interrupt you! I know you’re on your lunch break, but Director Lee is here to see you about a supposed emergency.” Her tone sounded like she felt bad, but Jungkook was more focused on what she said.

He looked down at you, staring wide-eyed at him, waiting for the news.

“Um— can you just tell him to come back later?” Jungkook threaded his fingers through his hair, stressed and unable to hide the annoyance in his voice any longer.

“He says it’s urgent.” She already had an answer, knowing her boss well.

“Fuck.” Jungkook groaned as quietly as he could. It was crude language for work, but his secretary was used to it by now, often on the receiving end of frustrated rants when censoring himself was the least of his concerns. 

“Can you give us—  me a few minutes?” A slip of the tongue, remembering he was technically the only one supposed to be in here. Luckily, she didn’t seem to notice. 

“Of course, just call back when you’re ready.” And with that, she hung up and the countdown began.

As soon as she was gone, Jungkook resisted the urge to throw the phone across the room. Of course the one day he wasn’t in here by himself, Director Lee just had to show up. It probably wasn’t even an actual emergency. He had a habit of doing this from time to time in order for an excuse to speak to Jungkook, and of course this “emergency” had to happen today.

Jungkook looked down at you and debated whether or not there was any conceivable possibility of finishing before Director Lee came in. He was already so close, just a little longer and he’d be putty in your hands.

“What’s going on?” You finally asked when he hadn’t said anything.

“Director Lee’s outside. He says it’s an emergency.” Jungkook felt like crying. He was so close. 

You looked around, panicked, because there was no way you looked presentable, and Jungkook looked more than a little disheveled with his shiny lips and your lipstick all over his face. Instead of thinking about it too much, you hurriedly got to your feet, knees a little shaky from being on them for so long, but that didn’t stop you as you quickly tried to help clean Jungkook up. 

He looked up at you with wide eyes as you used your fingers to wipe away the red stains littered all over his cheeks, lips, and neck. His eyes were glossy and you had to resist the urge to kiss that look off his face knowing that would just leave marks again, but you let your thumb lightly caress his cheek.

“I’m not going anywhere. I promise I’ll finish when he leaves.” You reassured him as you tried to help fix his ruffled hair, moving the strands back in place and out of his eyes. 

Jungkook’s heart hammered in his chest so hard he was almost sure you could hear it. His mind was a mess, and the affection just made him want you even more. He would give anything to have you bent over his desk right now. 

He looked presentable, at least enough so that in the dim light hopefully Director Lee wouldn’t question anything. You, though… Where were you going to hide? You looked around.

Your first instinct was to hide behind the blinds, but that would never work in a million years. There was really nowhere in his office you could hide without it being incredibly ridiculous except…

“You think I could fit under there?” You asked quickly, pointing to the spot underneath Jungkook’s desk. It would be a tight fit, but there weren’t any better options.

Jungkook moved out of the way, and with a little maneuvering as you tried your best to find the most comfortable position, you were able to slide underneath. In the meantime, Jungkook went through the painful process of trying to tuck himself back into his pants.

He had tears in his eyes as he struggled for a moment. It was so hard, he was so hard, that at this point trying to get himself back in was more than a task. And his touch… anything could have set him off, but he worked carefully so he wouldn’t end up making a mess in his hands. He couldn’t disappoint you. But it hurt. It hurt so much that at this point, he just had to make do with leaving his pants unzipped because no way in hell he would be able to get them closed. 

With you squished under his desk and he now looking normal enough for this short meeting, Jungkook took a few deep breaths to calm his nerves as he scooched closer to his desk. 

“You— you ok down there?” He asked quickly. 

“Yeah, just don’t be too long.” You called out. Jungkook spread his legs a little wider to give you more room.

It wasn’t the most comfortable position, but at least the view made up for it. 

“I’ll try and make this quick. I’m so sorry…” Jungkook sighed, evidently frustrated. Of all days, this had to happen when he had been so close… so fucking close. Director Lee better have an actual emergency. He had a habit of coming in and claiming “emergencies” when really, he just wanted to talk. Jungkook knew what he was doing, trying to get into his favor in hopes of getting into his dad’s good graces, hoping for a promotion soon or after Jungkook was meant to take over. 

It was annoying under normal circumstances, but if he was trying to do the same thing now… Jungkook took a few deep breaths to calm himself before finally picking up the phone again. 

“Hey… yeah, you can send him in, but please tell him I’m busy and to make it quick.” You intently listened to his words and while Jungkook had tried to stay calm, you could still clearly hear the agitation in his voice.

It was cute. Maybe a little hot too? You shook the thought out of your head, not liking it at all. 

With bated breath, you listened to the sound of the door creek open and the hurried clicks of dress shoes slowly coming closer to the desk. Director Lee was alright in your opinion. He was one of the executives in marketing, but you weren’t sure exactly what he did. He was fine at his job, but he would talk for hours about the most obscure thing. You hadn’t really talked to him much, just seen him at the few meetings you’d attended so far as another executive, but hopefully—

“Head Director Jeon!” Director Lee’s cheerful voice rang out. Jungkook had tried to make himself look busy, quickly shaking his computer awake and mindlessly scrolling over some random document he had open before his breakdown. 

Jungkook almost rose to his feet on instinct, ready to greet him with a polite bow, but luckily he caught himself before the situation ended less than favorable. Instead, he kept himself busy before finally meeting Director Lee’s eyes. 

“Director Lee! I’m sorry for the wait.” Jungkook tried to smile as the man himself came over, bowing quickly before taking a seat on one of the chairs in front of his desk. 

Great. That likely meant this wouldn’t take only two seconds. Jungkook just hoped that wasn’t the case, nor did he notice the lack of greeting.

“I’m sorry to bother you when you’re busy, but there were just a few questions I had from marketing for you.” Director Lee smiled, and Jungkook let out a sigh of relief knowing this was actually about work. 

You were somewhat listening. You picked up on a few things you’d hear marketing discuss in the meetings you attended, but most of it went over your head. You honestly had hoped that this was only going to be a few questions, but you were always wrong. 

At some point, Jungkook briefly mentioned wanting to travel. They had been discussing something about the EU branch located in Germany, leading to Director Lee talking about the time he took his family there when he was on a business trip. Jungkook had quickly mentioned his desire to travel more, and then suddenly he was being handed Director Lee’s phone to look through all the pictures of the Lee family during their trips to all these faraway places. 

Although Jungkook did a good job at remaining calm in front of Director Lee, you could see the way his leg bounced restlessly as he listened to the director talk about the time his family went to Budapest from your position underneath the desk. You wanted to calm him down a little and without thinking too deeply, you placed a reassuring hand on his thigh, gently running your hand along it, letting him know you were still here. 

You hadn’t been paying too much attention to their conversation. After all, it wasn’t meant to be one you were a part of, and you tried your best to give them a little privacy. But right in that moment, you noticed the way Jungkook stopped talking momentarily about business trips as your hand trailed up his leg, before slowly dragging back into the conversation. 

Oh. You liked that a little too much.

Your reassurance was only meant to be quick, a very brief reminder that you were here, but you kept going, your hand going up further, up his thigh to where his open zipper laid. For a brief moment, you considered stopping. Director Lee was right there, but as you started pulling your hand away, suddenly another was wrapped around your wrist stopping your movements. 

It took a moment to realize it was Jungkook. You stared for a while, his tight grip fleeting as he lightly placed your hand back on his thigh, all while he continued on with Director Lee. It was just enough to give you the confidence to go further. Luckily Jungkook made it easy for you.

You were a little too eager slipping into his pants, pulling him out ever so gently, and feeling him in your grasp again. Jungkook immediately had his hand around your wrist the minute your fingers brushed against him. 

It was a warning, a fleeting one, one you could tell even he wasn’t sure about. For a moment you were sure his hand was trying to pull you closer. 

You had some common sense— you had no intention of getting him so riled up that Director Lee would walk around the desk to see you cramped underneath Jungkook’s desk playing with his cock. As much as you’d love to watch him squirm while he tried his best to remain composed, you also wanted to walk out of here with a job. You knew your limits.

You were subtle at first, You watched and listened intently as your thumb lightly traced over the tip. You got another instant reaction, his hand quickly tightening around your wrist, and you heard his voice waver slightly. 

Your efforts were slow and controlled. You didn’t want him to scream, but you did want him to feel it. Slow light touches grazed up his skin, so delicate, as you made sure he’d never forget you were here. It was nice, as he returned faint squeezes around your wrist. 

“You and your wife should come with us one day!” Director Lee bellowed out with a hearty laugh after Jungkook faintly wished he could have been there for that experience. The conversation had moved to Alaska and the Northern Lights now… you had no idea how they got on that topic. You were startled slightly by the sudden outburst. Your hand slipped and suddenly his fingers were laced in your hair and underneath the laughter, your ears instantly locked onto a subtle moan. 

Jungkook was quick to cover it with a cough that Director Lee seemingly didn’t notice. At this point, you feared you had gone a little too far accidently. You were going to call it quits until Director Lee left, but as your grip loosened, suddenly his hand was on your wrist again stopping you in your tracks. 

He didn’t want you to stop, and you wanted to please him. 

You pushed past your hesitation, instead deciding to get even more bold. You leaned forward enough to the point you were face to face with his weeping cock once again. You took it in your hand and lightly ran your tongue along the tip. You were instantly rewarded with his hand lacing into your hair, and you wished you could have seen his face. 

You listened to the way his breathing grew heavier with each swipe of your tongue. You also noticed the subtle way he’d try to keep your head down longer any time you came up. As wrong as it might be, it was hot, and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, so was he. 

He was painfully hot, so hot you once again found yourself wondering how you didn’t notice sooner. You honestly probably didn’t want to, your hatred blinding you from both his suffering and anguish as well as his… nice composition. That wasn’t entirely true… you knew that he was conventionally attractive, maybe a little more so than most, but looks meant nothing when he was being petty to you. Now that you were exposed to the cracks in his façade, you could push past your turbulent history and acknowledge the fact you understood the stares he received when he’d walk around the office and the swooning no matter his questionable leadership. You got it more than anyone now that you’d gotten a glimpse behind his sad gaze. 

Unfortunately, you understood it too much. Watching him try not to fall apart in front of the director made the ache between your legs apparent, and you wanted nothing more than to take him right there in his office. But this wasn’t about you; it was about him. You wanted that sad look behind his eyes to disappear, even just for a second. But later tonight you just might need to revisit an old friend you kept in your bottom drawer. A reunion was more than necessary at this point.

Curse him.

•────•──────────•────•

Jungkook should have stopped you, he knew that. This was embarrassing, the highest level of inappropriate he could have achieved, but he felt like he’d reached such a breaking point that he simply didn’t care. All he could think about was the orgasm that he was on the verge of having before you were interrupted. The minute you had your hand on him he never wanted it to leave. 

At this point, he was this close to screaming at Director Lee to leave. But he rambled on and on about all the excursions he took his family on whenever he got some time off. Jungkook tried his best to smile and nod along whenever he made eye contact, but the minute you had your tongue running along him, he could barely keep it together. 

Jungkook wondered how Director Lee hadn’t noticed. He wasn’t doing a good job hiding that something was up. Jungkook was struggling to keep his eyes open as your lips wrapped around him with the subtle flicks of your hand. At this point, Director Lee probably thought he had some type of cold by how much he had to cough to stop himself from moaning out for you to make him cum. 

He felt delirious, like he was looking over the precipice of a high-rise and the world around him started to spin as he tried to make out the ground down below. He was so close. So close to finally getting the release he’d been craving for days. So close, but of fucking course Director Lee just had to come into his office now.

“I’m sure Ms. Han would love Barcelona!” For some reason, Director Lee had already started planning out a trip that Yuri and him were meant to join with his family. Jungkook practically had to bite his tongue to stop himself from saying that the last thing he wanted to think about was Yuri when he had you underneath his desk pleasing him so well. He didn’t want to think of anything; no work, no business, he just wanted to cum… why was that so hard?!

“I’m sure she—she—she… would.” Your tongue had licked right over the slit and he was horrible at pretending he wasn’t on the verge of losing it. You felt so good.

Your efforts weren’t enough to get him to cum yet, something he felt was intentional. But the longer he had to stare at Director Lee’s face, the more he was starting to care less and less about the world around him. He just wanted—

Please.

“It’s honestly beautiful— I went there when I was fifteen. It was a high school trip I’m pretty sure, and—” Blah blah blah, if he wasn’t out of his face in the next two minutes…

He didn’t want to hear about this trip. Spending any time with Director Lee outside of a work context felt like a nightmare. Jungkook knew that he’d probably end up spending less time with Yuri than Director Lee, talking his head off about some random thing he’s convinced they have in common. It maybe wouldn’t be so bad if Jungkook didn’t know his type as well as he did. It was all an attempt at trying to fast-track a promotion. Director Lee probably didn’t care about him at all, or the things they had in common, and would actually hate for Yuri and him to be there on his family trip. This conversation was pointless.

“And we’d have to go hiking across the… sights are so beautiful… the pictures I took were—”

“O-oohhh-oh…” It was a quiet, hushed moan and Jungkook quickly had to blink away the tears that had started to settle in his eyes at the strain of keeping it together. You had finally taken the whole tip and Jungkook was just getting worse and worse at covering up his moans. The cough that followed was a little slow, and he probably sounded in as much pain as he felt.

He wanted to see you, wanted to touch you.

“Head Director Jeon, are you ok?” Director Lee feigned concerned. He always insisted on calling him his full title instead of the more casual “Director Jeon” that everyone else used and he preferred. He would even choose the awkward “Mr. Jeon,” despite it making him feel weird since he was younger than the majority of the staff he worked with, over the full title. He hated people using it for no other reason than it always just felt like just an attempt to get in his good graces.

“Fine— just…” deep breaths… “The cold’s started to get to me slightly…” Jungkook tried to laugh, but his eyes were getting watery. He probably looked like a mess. He wanted you to make him into an even bigger one than he already was. 

“Oh! If you’re sick, I know a great tea recipe that would—” Jungkook couldn’t pay attention any longer than two seconds. He couldn’t stop imagining what might happen the minute Director Lee left, what you might do, and the blissful release afterward. He just wanted you, please, please, please…

He couldn’t do this anymore.

“— Director Lee, I’m sorry to interrupt, but—” it hurts so much “but I’m pretty busy today…” Jungkook tried to be nice, but he really was worried what he might do if Director Lee wasn’t out the door in the next five seconds.

Director Lee looked shocked for a second. He wasn’t expecting that. Usually Jungkook would always put up with his bullshit even though he despised the mooching, but today any longer and Jungkook would seriously cause a scene. 

Jungkook attempted to put on the best, most apologetic smile he could muster as the Director processed his words. 

“Oh, yes, I’m sorry. Your secretary mentioned you were busy before I came in.” Jungkook nearly jumped for joy when Director Lee finally got up from the chair in front of him. 

Director Lee bowed politely and Jungkook once again had to resist the urge to get up and bear him a respectful farewell, but that was out of the question right now. Instead, Jungkook bowed his head slightly, hoping the director wouldn’t think too much of it.

“I’ll be in contact about how things go at the US branch,” Director Lee mentioned and Jungkook had nearly forgotten that he had first come in with an actual reason. Aside from discussing some things about marketing, Director Lee had wanted to go over some information before he left for the US branch tomorrow, and that’s how they ended up talking about travel. It was then when Director Lee mentioned how his family just came back from London and he was flying out again.

Jungkook only nodded, nervous that if he spoke at this point the only thing that would come out was an embarrassing plea for you to make him cum. But to his delight, Jungkook watched Director Lee make his way to the door. You must have heard him leaving because the minute the sounds of his footsteps echoed off the marble floors, you quickly kicked it up five notches, finally putting Jungkook out of his misery and taking him down your throat again. 

Jungkook’s eyes fluttered closed as he took it all in. Your mouth brought so many new sensations, he was having trouble keeping up. It felt good, and deep down he selfishly relished in it all. 

“Have a good day, Head Director Jeon.” Director Lee bowed and Jungkook wanted to scream at him to leave, but instead he sent another pained smile and a slight wave his way. 

When he heard the door close, Jungkook let his head fall to his desk. Silent besides the now obvious sounds of you shifting underneath the desk. It hurt so much, he just wanted to—

“Please, please, please make me cum!” A hushed sob escaped as the tears finally spilled from his eyes. He was shameless and his ears felt hot with embarrassment, but for a moment he didn’t care, he just wanted to cum. 

He felt you gently tap his leg and he finally remembered that you were cramped down there. He quickly rolled his chair back, giving you the opportunity to climb out from under the desk. He watched with hungry eyes as you stretched your tense limbs. Even fully clothed, just watching your body move under your blouse was more than enough to make him lose his mind. 

Get it together, Jeon. But he couldn’t, he wanted you so badly— his watery eyes stared as you moved back into a comfortable position between his legs. 

“Please— please— I’m so close.” He cried. 

You looked at him with those kind eyes and gave him a warm smile that tingled more than just his heart. 

“I got you, just let go when you’re ready.” You didn’t even give him a chance to answer before you took him in completely. Jungkook couldn’t stop the moan that fell his lips at the warmth and wetness your mouth provided. It was amazing, you were amazing, you always were. Your pace was quick this time, sensing his urgency. It was probably only a few seconds before that growing feeling returned, this time with no plans of stopping. 

“C-close!” Jungkook hurried out, but he feared you couldn’t understand him with how mangled it came out.

Jungkook let one hand tangle in your hair, needing to grab ahold of something, while the other came over his mouth to stop himself from screaming. For a second, he worried if he was doing this right, was he embarrassing himself right now? Did you hate him? Did you resent him for pulling you into this? This was all so new, he didn’t want to mess things up, but he couldn’t think clearly and hardly had the capacity to care right now.

Jungkook finally found the strength to look down, the sight of you taking him so well caused sparks to run through his body, making it impossible to delay the inevitable.

“Your mouth!” It came out a little louder than he wanted it to, but it was meant to be a warning. He was close, and if you didn’t move away soon then… He thought you’d move off of him, maybe finish him off by hand, but instead you sped up your pace despite his warning. For a second, Yuri flashed in his head, and the sheer utter fear of disappointing you like he’d done to her so many times came crashing down like a wave in a storm. 

As he sped toward the edge, he tried his best to delay it until you could get off of him. Yuri would hate the mess and he feared your reaction— no, he had to last just a little longer—

“Y/n, I’m serious, I’m—” His efforts were fruitless. The tears in his eyes finally spilled over; the pleasure and the guilt grew overwhelming. His body was on fire, and the sheer relief of having you this close made the end come all too quickly.

Jungkook kept his hand clamped over his mouth, but his attempt was futile as moans still slipped from his lips. They were muffled, nonsensical, and sounded as pained as he felt, the blinding hot release spreading throughout his entire body and ultimately into your mouth. Tears ran down his cheeks, his grip in your hair growing tighter as you steadily worked him through his orgasm.

“Fu—oh—go—fuck.” There weren’t words to describe how good he felt.

He could feel his release paint your mouth, a horrible mix of shame and something else he didn’t want to admit bubbling in the depths of his mind. His whole body shook, even after what felt like an endless stream of his release filled your mouth. Wave after wave of tears just kept coming because finally… fucking finally.

He momentarily forgot where you both were and who he was. It just felt so good to forget. It was the freedom he craved when he was alone sometimes. But this was wrong, he knew it was.

As the wave started to die down, instead of a graceful landing, he practically crashed with how quickly new tears started spilling from his eyes. His muffled moans turned into sobs and he couldn’t bear to look down at you. He didn’t want to see your disappointment. You were already so kind, and he just had to go and ruin it because he couldn’t wait until you had moved off of him. 

“Jungkook, you ok?” Your voice was laced with concern as he felt your hand running along his thigh.

“I’m sorry!” Jungkook just sobbed. His face was wet, and his hair was soaked with tears and sweat. He knew he looked like a mess.

There was a moment of silence while you tried to rack your brain for what he was talking about. “Why are you sorry?” You were so gentle, hating how upset he seemed. 

“I tried to— I tried to wait— I’m so sorry!” He choked out, trying to be quiet as Secretary Yu was right outside, but the shame that crept over his body made it hard to stay in control.

You looked notably shocked.

“I told you that you could cum whenever you were ready,” you chuckled, rubbing his leg gently. 

“That’s not— your mouth… I came inside— I’m sorry.” Jungkook finally looked down and you could see just how distraught he seemed, the wetness around his eyes more than heartbreaking. Finding a little strength, you finally rose to your feet. Your knees were achy, but you persevered so you could face him a little better. 

You took the initiative and brought your finger up to his chin so he’d look at you. His eyes were shiny, red, and filled with a sadness you couldn’t quite comprehend. This wasn’t how this was meant to end.

“You don’t need to apologize for something I wanted.” You gently rubbed your thumb along his wet cheek. Your cheeks burned from the confession, but you were glad you said it when you saw the tension fall from his soft features. 

“H-huh?” 

“Maybe I should have asked, but I thought it was best to avoid any mess.” Might he have preferred it more if he painted your face? The image in your mind made your face even hotter, not exactly against the idea if you didn’t have to worry about walking out in front of your coworkers.

“I thought I messed up already… made you disappointed, that you— you’d hate me too.” Just the word hate made his eyes watery all over again. He’d heard it too many times from Yuri, and he was sure it wouldn’t be long before he heard it from you too.

It was then you realized what he was referring to, that he thought somehow cumming in your mouth was a mistake he made? It was crazy and reaffirmed that Jungkook was telling the truth when he said it was his first time having someone go down on him. But that was the least of your worries, instead, the harsh words he’d expected as retribution stood out to you more than anything. The truth of the reasoning behind his sad eyes, why his dimpled smile never appeared anymore, and the sense of what might be happening behind closed doors grew more terrifying the more he spoke to you. 

“Just wanted you to feel good— I can’t hate you for that.” You smiled, and you were a little shocked when you suddenly felt his hands on your waist pull you closer.

“Did it feel good?” You giggled at the affection, but your face was burning. This isn’t what you expected from him. 

Instead of answering, Jungkook tugged you down onto his lap and wrapped his arms around your frame, pulling you into a tight embrace. 

“Thank you…” He shakily sighed. You couldn’t truly understand the relief you brought him. It was his gratitude for everything— for being here with him, for putting up with his pathetic desperation, for making the thoughts that clouded his mind dissipate for only a second, and the list could go on really. You seriously were as amazing as he imagined. 

“I didn’t know… it just— it felt so good, thank you… thank you.” He sweetly mumbled into your blouse. You would have never pictured Jungkook as the affectionate type, and your body and mind were struggling to keep up. You tried your best to ignore the way your heart was nearly beating out of your chest, instead choosing to just be there for him. If this is what he wanted, you’d happily oblige, doing whatever it took to make him feel better— to fix him. 

“No need to thank me— if anything, thank you.” You laughed. You were just as guilty as Jungkook. All you could think about since Tuesday was Jungkook’s body pressed against yours in a heat of emotion. You thought giving him the cold shoulder would be enough to forget it all, but you were so easily pulled back in. You hated it, right now you wanted to avoid the consequences, but you couldn’t stop the growing warmth spreading through your body seeing him feel a little better. 

You expected him to laugh along with you, but Jungkook’s gaze just held onto yours before his eyes started traveling down to where your bodies met. You were a little confused at first, but once his eyes met yours again, you realized you knew that look all too well. 

Oh?

You watched with curious eyes as he started leaning in, curious what he might do considering how timid he was earlier. Maybe it was because he was still riding the high you gave him only minutes ago, but this time he easily pulled you in to meet his lips. 

He was so gentle, he always was. You quickly realized you liked the way his kisses felt, the way he held you close. You didn’t hate it; you couldn’t hate this at all. The soft moment was over quickly though, as his hands started running along your body, instantly making the simmering flame reignite inside you. Your hands quickly found a place running through his long, damp hair, pulling him closer because the last thing you wanted right now was to be away from him. 

All of a sudden, Jungkook wrapped his hands around you and hoisted you up onto the desk. He was standing between your legs, much like the position you found yourselves in a few days ago. Then his lips were on your neck, light, but more than enough for a soft moan to leave your lips before you could stop yourself. Your body was hot, and the urge to pull him closer was growing painful at this point.

“I want to make you feel good too,” Jungkook softly whispered against your skin. Dangerous, the words were so dangerous, and you wondered if he noticed the way your legs wrapped around his waist tighter, wanting to make that very wish come true.

“You’ve been so good to me— it feels so unfair, like I'm being too selfish. You’ve made me feel so good, you should too.” This is certainly not what you were expecting out of this interaction. You had imagined that since Jungkook was cheating on his wife with you, this was all going to be about the indulgence he couldn’t get from his wife.  You were just the method he’d use to get himself off. It’s not like you entirely hated the idea of him using you for relief, you were here to help him after all, though anytime you’d think about it as an affair it made you sick. But you never thought there was anything in it for you. 

Jungkook’s warm hands sliding up your thigh took you out of your thoughts, steadily pushing up your skirt in the process. When he held you like this, it was easy to forget where you were. 

You placed your hand on his, stopping him from pushing it any further. You noticed his eyes glance down, and suddenly panic spread across his features as he quickly grew noticeably flustered.

“Oh— was I being too pushy? I’m sor—” You quickly shushed him, not wanting him to overthink it.

“It’s just— we’re still in your office in the middle of a work day,” you pointed out. It was easy to forget that in the heat of emotions. Plus, Jungkook had the blinds closed, the lamp on his desk the only lighting for the room. But the glimmer of sunshine slipping in from underneath the blinds was the sole indication that it was, in fact, the middle of the afternoon on a perfect, cloudless, sunny day.

Jungkook looked over at the windows as well, and you noticed the way his face flushed. It seemed he had forgotten as well. 

“Ohhhh, right.” Jungkook shyly mumbled, clearly a little disappointed. “I’m sor—”

“Don’t apologize. I honestly want to take you up on the offer— just not here where someone might walk in again.” At the mere mention of Jungkook touching you, your body remembered how his fingers felt inside you that night. Despite his clear lack of experience being on the receiving end of pleasure, Jungkook somehow knew how to touch you in a way that made you see stars. 

Jungkook pulled you a little closer. “I know a place— uh, only if you’re interested.” He quickly added, always so polite. 

You gave him a look that told him to keep going. 

“It’s a storage closet for most of the cleaning supplies and sometimes additional things for the office. Only the janitors use the room, but they hardly go in there since it’s not really a janitor's closet. They mainly use it for restocks of their supplies. Plus, no one can come in without the required access,” Jungkook explained, and it sounded perfectly like what you needed. 

“I’m assuming that means you have access then?” You looked down at the lanyard he had sitting on his desk. 

“I’m the only one aside from the janitors.” He shyly smiled.

You thought about it for a second before hopping off the desk. “Alright then, sounds like a plan. I have a meeting to get to and some work to do— but are you free at four?” You asked, trying your best to smooth down your hair and clothes.

Jungkook moved out of the way slightly, and from the corner of your eye, you could feel his gaze scanning over your body. You couldn’t stop the smirk spreading across your face.

“Uhhhh…” For a second, you wondered if waiting until four was too big of an ask. 

“I can wait— yeah— four’s ok.” There was a shakiness to his words that made it seem like he didn’t entirely believe himself. He really was too cute.

You focused on trying to get yourself back to normal, working on your hair with only your hands as best you could. Jungkook helped you get the smeared lipstick off your face, and you helped him with a similar problem along with taming his hair and fixing his shirt so it didn’t look like you’d been tugging on it for the last half hour. 

In the end, you were able to get yourself to look somewhat decent. You realized way too late that Jungkook had a mirror in his office and you were able to address the details that he might not have seen. Jungkook looked good too. Well, he always did, but maybe you might say he looked even better than when you first walked in?

He had this cute, dopey grin on his face, and the way you had messed up his hair made the soft curls cascade around his face in a way that made him look incredibly ethereal. He had what some might call a ‘glow,’ and it didn’t take much speculation to figure out what it might have been from.

A swell of pride filled your chest, along with a bit of relief knowing you were able to make him feel better, even if only for a short amount of time. 

Your goodbye was brief. You knew your coworkers, Taehyung and Solmi especially, would be looking for you by now.

“See you at four,” you mentioned as you took one last look in the mirror. Jungkook had told you where the closet was, and he was sitting on his desk looking at you while you finished getting ready.

“Mhmmm” He lulled. “Can’t wait~” It was a shy admission that made this cute, boyish grin appear on his face.

You had to get out of here.

“Alright then, don't forget to eat lunch!” By the look on his face at your words, you knew he probably hadn’t even thought about it. 

“Don’t forget… you’re on your lunch break after all.” You reaffirmed, knowing there was a chance he’d still forget even after your reminder. 

“I won’t… see you later.” That same dopey smile appeared on his face and you had to physically tear yourself away so you could finally leave. Curse him and that face of his.

You were finally able to leave. You hastily sped past Secretary Yu, and in the corner of your eye, you caught her confusion at your sudden departure. You could only hope she hadn’t heard anything. You don’t know how long she was there…

•────•──────────•────•

Maybe you should have just taken Jungkook up on his offer to take you right there on his desk again. You had underestimated your own ability to wait. Jungkook had riled you up too much. Watching him lose himself from your mouth, with his eager need to reciprocate, made you excited. 

You hated it. You hated this. Just like that night, you had left his office feeling good, but once you made it back to your desk, those feelings of guilt and shame came back all over again. You had to remind yourself a couple of times that this was a married man you were messing with. He had a wife, and you were jeopardizing any chance of their relationship ever improving. The thought of being a homewrecker, the other woman, made your skin crawl. You hated it.

This was wrong, and that was all you should be feeling as the weight of your actions started to sink in. You hated it even more because you were excited, painfully so, as you watched the time tick down.

Jungkook certainly didn’t help either. It seemed his eyes were on you any chance they’d get. The strange thing was you saw more of him today than you usually do. Jungkook liked to spend his days holed up in his office, aside from the meetings he was required to attend and oversee, but today things were different. 

Jungkook was everywhere you turned, that same dopey look still on his face, and he always seemed to be staring at you. You wanted to scream at him because he couldn’t make it any more obvious, but you couldn’t because you liked his hungry gaze. It just fueled your thoughts about what might happen at four.

You were uncomfortably hot despite the freezing temperature outside. You were angry, you were way too horny, and as much as you should have been running away when the time finally struck four, you couldn’t have been happier. 

Jungkook had texted you about an hour ago (you both had quickly exchanged numbers right before you left) that he was going to go about five minutes or so early to let you in and asked for you to wait a little while just in case anyone saw anything. Just like a few hours prior, you walked through the halls looking over your shoulder, closely analyzing to make sure no one was following or even seeing you in the hallway. It was more stressful than it should have been, but eventually, you made it to where Jungkook had instructed. 

Storage Closet. Okay, this was it.

*Knock knock,* you paused for a second, and then followed it up with an additional two knocks. It had also been his idea to add a special, secret password just in case. You thought it was a little much, but he looked so cute while he came up with the code, so you let him have his fun. 

It took a second, and you were a little scared that for some reason this wasn’t the right door, or that maybe Jungkook might not be there yet and you came too early. But right as your anxiety soared through the roof, a small crack opened in the doorway. 

Lo and behold, peaking right through the door were the big, round, bewildered eyes of the man you were hoping for. You let out a sigh of relief as he opened the door further, revealing that it was just him in here like he promised. You looked around once more before going inside. 

Jungkook had kept the lights off, but as he shut the door behind you, he finally turned on the dim light and you were able to see the space a little better. It was pretty much exactly what you expected. There were mainly shelves lined with cleaning supplies and the occasional surplus of office supplies, like a huge stack of printer paper that you quickly made note of to ask Jungkook about later because you were always running out in the copy room. Besides that, there were a couple of tables you were confused what they were for, but some lined the space where the shelves ended, and there was also one that sat right in the center of the room. The room wasn’t that big, smaller than Jungkook’s office, but not by much. It definitely wasn’t cramped, and you let out a sigh of relief knowing it wasn’t grimy like you had feared. Instead, it matched the rest of the modern sleekness of the office outside. It really was perfect. 

You finally turned around to face Jungkook. He hadn’t said anything yet, but with the telling look in his eyes, he didn’t need to. You had only just noticed that Jungkook had gotten rid of his suit jacket, now just adorning his white button-up carefully tucked into his blue slacks with the sleeves rolled up. It all came together with a black belt with a shiny, gold buckle that glinted in the low light. You could only imagine how much it cost knowing the type of money he had. He looked good, too good. It’s like he had a long day at work, casting aside his jacket for a little more breathing room, and was now standing right in front of you. He looked casual, but classy in a way that made you squeeze your thighs together because, wow. With this look, you could even catch a glimpse of the tattoos that you had seen the other day. It was too much. You were too weak, and you just needed this man now. 

“Sooooo…” you began, the silence starting to grow a little awkward.  

Jungkook honestly didn’t know what to say. He was too busy drinking you in. The minute you left his office, he instantly regretted not asking if you had time to slip away to the storage room a little sooner. He was riding a high he didn’t know how to come down from. You had blown his mind. Sex had never felt that good, and you taking the initiative had been something he struggled to comprehend all day. It just made him even more eager to please you. You had been so nice, nicer than what he deserved, and he just wanted to make you feel even a sliver of what you gave him. He highly doubted it could compare, but anything to show you how grateful he was to have you here with him. 

Jungkook had struggled to keep it together since the moment you left. His eyes found you easily as he was pulled out of his office far more often than usual. It was nice to see you, but it just made this moment that much harder to wait for. Now that you were in front of him…

Jungkook barely noticed you had spoken. Instead, his gaze fixated on your long legs, your sheer black stockings coming up all the way to meet your short, black pencil skirt. Your outfit was completed nicely with a red blouse and pointed stilettos, making you even more alluring. You had also done a bit more fixing up since you left his office. Your red lipstick was back to perfection and your hair was neatly styled back the way it was when you initially walked into his office.

He didn’t have the confidence to say it earlier, and he was honestly a little ashamed that it was even a thought in his head, but he liked the way you looked after he was done with you. Something about ruining your neatness made his length ache in a way he didn’t quite understand. It was embarrassing, and he knew he should be ashamed, but for some reason today, he just didn’t know how to act. 

Jungkook’s feet acted faster than his mouth could. He was never the best with words anyway. Slowly, he approached you, and instinctively you moved back until your legs hit one of the tables that lined the walls. Jungkook was quick to close the gap, pulling you into another tight embrace that made it so easy to bury into your warmth. For a second he just took it in, loving how you felt in his arms, and you smelled so good too.

“Fuck.” He lightly moaned into your shirt, embarrassed at how easy it was to rile him up. It didn’t take much from Yuri, nor did it take a lot from you either. Maybe he was easy. Yuri has mentioned before how easy he was to please. Jungkook never knew exactly what that meant. He was just trying to be a good husband. It felt wrong to demand anything more than what Yuri offered… but maybe she was right.

However, he didn’t want to think about that now. You made it so easy to forget about his marriage when normally the only thing he could focus on was how much of a failure he was, how he was making Yuri miserable, and how he could make her happy only if he was a little better. Instead, it felt like the rest of the world melted away anytime he was in your presence. It might sound horrible, but he enjoyed the silence for once. 

“Jungkook?” You finally questioned after he held onto you a little too long.

“Oh right, I’m sorry.” His face burned, worried you might think he was weird. He separated from you and went back over towards the door, where he held up his hand to the light switch.

“Not a lot of people come down this hallway. No one should bother us, but just in case, it might be better to keep the lights off so no one suspects we’re in here,” Jungkook added. It was both a legitimate reason and also an excuse to turn the lights off again. The lights were dim, but not dim enough, and the thought of you seeing him, disappointing you like he had done to Yuri so many times… he couldn’t do that. It would be easier this way.

“Oh? Smart thinking, sir.” 

Jungkook quickly flipped the lights off, the only light now coming in was from underneath the door. Both of you could hardly see each other, but Jungkook was used to the dark. His eyes adjusted quickly to see a vague outline of your form standing by the desk.

“Mmmmm… What did I say about being so formal with me?” His tone was low, teasing almost, and when his hand grazed your arm, you practically jumped in surprise. It made you shiver when you realized he was so close.

“No Sir, no Mr. Jeon, no Director Jeon, no Head Director Jeon. It’s just Jungkook when we’re alone like this,” Jungkook mumbled slowly. He hated it, especially from you. It felt weird anytime anyone was formal with him, but he especially couldn’t stand the honorifics when you were both literally the same age. It felt wrong and fake, and that’s not what he wanted to be like with you.

“I got you. I’m sorry, Jungkook.” You made sure to emphasize his name since apparently he liked hearing it.

He did. He really did for some reason. Taking him out of the moment slightly, he had to stop himself from giggling at you trying to make him out in the dark, your squinting all too adorable. It made the horrible need to have you consume him in seconds.

Jungkook had his arms around you again, this time to lift you onto the table. He was gentle, like he always was, and he kept in close proximity. Having you this close again made his brain all fuzzy. Jungkook moved even closer and pulled you back into his arms. 

“I missed you…” he sighed, an embarrassing confession but one that was true nonetheless. He couldn’t stop thinking about you since you’d left, and it felt so good to have you here.

You didn’t want to admit it either, but it felt so good to have him here as well. You sighed in relief as you pulled him closer, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

It was a moment of softness that neither of you were really prepared for. It was nice though; you couldn’t deny it. He gave great hugs, so warm and inviting. There was an unexpected sweet smell in the air around him. You could tell his cologne was expensive, it was soft and delicate, just like the wine he gifted you on Tuesday. You felt like you could get drunk from his very presence, and that just made the ache even worse.

“Jungkook, please—” you rushed out, and he was quick to respond. Jungkook pulled you close, finally closing the agonizing distance between you two. You both had run out of patience to be soft and you were too needy to take it slow, instead going straight in with hurried and desperate kisses.

Your lips chased after each other. Any moment apart felt like an eternity, and when his hands came up and gently tugged on your blouse, the room grew hot quickly. You both knew at the end of the day, as much as you wanted to savor this moment, you were still in the middle of the workday. This had to be quick. 

Jungkook let his hand roam down your sides, touching and squeezing anything he could grab. Your blouse came first. He anxiously toyed with the few buttons it had and you both made quick work of undoing them until you could feel the chill air of the storage room on your chest. It made you remember what you had on underneath, and you cursed to yourself slightly when you realized it wasn’t anything cute, just a regular, plain black bra. But you found some relief in the fact that it was dark in here. You could still barely see Jungkook even after a few minutes had passed. However, Jungkook must have superhuman eyes because you felt him pull back for a second, and you thought you could see him staring because of the faint outline cast onto him from the light underneath the door. 

And he was staring. How could he not? You took his breath away every time he saw you. You were too kind for doing this, and deep down he knew that it was likely because of how pitiful he looked. It was probably the only reason any of this was happening. You gave him the same look that everyone else did. Dr. Min, Jimin, Dae-Jung… he’d seen it too many times. He hated it. He hated the pity. They just didn’t understand, you didn’t either apparently, that he deserved everything he got. 

To try and rid himself of his darkening thoughts, he quickly kissed you once again as his hand trailed up your thigh to push your short skirt up. It pleased him more than anything when he felt your soft skin, letting him know you were wearing thigh-highs once again.

Jungkook groaned into the kiss, a burning desire returning all too quickly. No, no— this was about you. As much as he might want to have you, he was being too greedy. Even though Yuri wasn’t here, he could hear her words filled with disappointment at him for being so selfish. You already fucked him a few days ago, and despite his pathetic begging, you gave him his first blowjob. It had been all about him so far, and you’d given more than he ever deserved. If he could only stop thinking with his dick for five seconds, maybe he could make you feel even a quarter of what you gave him—

Tears pricked his eyes with just the feeling of having you so close as your hands ran over his shirt—

“Wanna make you feel good…” Jungkook said, far too shakily. His hand snaked in between your bodies, his eager fingers shocked to meet the wetness of your panties.

“Please, Jungkook, please,” you cried out as quietly as you could. You couldn’t take it anymore. He quickly learned he wasn’t like Yuri; begging worked far too well on him. 

Jungkook stepped out from between your legs to give himself a little more room. But right before you could complain at the distance, Jungkook put a reassuring grip on your waist and his other hand traced the expanse of your covered thighs ever so lightly. Your breath was shaky the closer he grew to where you wanted— no, needed him, as his fingers lightly ran over your stockings, your body going into overdrive anytime he’d inch a little closer. 

“Fuck—” you whined, enjoying the light teasing, but you wanted more. You had no idea what he was doing, but every touch felt so sensitive. He finally pushed past your skirt and played with the hem of your stockings, pulling them back and letting them snap lightly back into place. 

You both moaned. 

“You’re so hot, I—” Jungkook groaned, but didn’t finish what he was going to say because something about that seemed to have set him off. He buried his face in your neck, quickly planting desperate kisses along your skin as his hand finally made their way to your panties once more, rubbing the soaked fabric. 

The way you practically yelped when you felt his fingers running over your slit was a little embarrassing. The way he made you feel didn’t make any sense. Jungkook knew just the way to touch you that had you practically bucking into his hand as he finally settled his fingers on your clit. Despite his lack of experience in other subjects, Jungkook certainly knew how to touch the little bud the right way, though he already proved that to you the last time.

You gripped the table hard as waves of pleasure traversed your whole body, stimulating an eagerness you hadn’t felt in a while. It reminded you of college, being on your own for the first time in your life, and how that freedom came with a need to explore. It was good. You both didn’t know each other’s bodies yet, but you still found ways to make each other feel good and forget about the countless deadlines that loomed over you. 

Jungkook gave you that rush all over again. A youthful rush that you only thought was possible to feel before you hit your second decade. 

He must have noticed your growing frustration because his fingers finally pulled the soaked fabric to the side, and you were able to feel him without any barrier in the way. You were absolutely soaked, embarrassingly so. Over the buzzing of the AC in the background, the squelches of his fingers running through your drenched folds filled the room and made your cheeks burn.

In the dark all your senses were heightened. You felt Jungkook’s body on yours and his soft sighs of pleasure right in your ear as he rubbed himself lightly against your thigh. In the heat of it, you could tell he was holding himself back, how he wanted more but seemed keen on his promise to make you feel good this time. 

Your body grew hotter by the second and the moment his fingers settled on your clit once again, drawing fast, teasing circles, while you struggled not to scream out loud. You quickly had to wrap your hands around his shoulders to stop yourself from crying out for any unlucky coworker who happened to be walking by to hear.

Even though the closet was slightly secluded in a hallway not many usually walked through, it certainly wasn’t far from where they did. You could even hear them in the far distance, the sounds of murmured voices growing louder before fading off, or the hurried clicking of heels through the tiled halls. They would definitely hear if you weren’t quiet.

But Jungkook was making that almost an impossible task by the way he was touching you. And you only wanted more.

“Jungkook!” His name tumbled from your lips far too loudly, your mind a little fuzzy, but you just needed him.

Suddenly, you felt a soft kiss on your cheek and then another one on your neck, a little slower this time in pulling away. 

“Can I taste you?” Jungkook lightly moaned in your ear, so gentle and soft in the way he asked. Tingles spread through your whole body and a whole new wave of arousal soaked his fingers. 

It was criminal how pretty he sounded. 

“Please,” you whined as quietly as you could, tears pricking your eyes. You’d never been so turned on before. The shame at the realization that this was happening at your workplace filled you for a second, but Jungkook pulling his hand away and lightly running over your thigh quickly brought you back. 

You groaned as you watched his faint outline move back between your legs and drop down to his knees. You could see the faint glimmer of his eyes as he bent down, his eager, yet innocent expression a deadly combination in such a compromising position like this one. But his innocence proved to be merely a facade. Jungkook quickly placed your legs over his shoulders, wrapped his arms around your thighs to hold them in place, and tugged you closer to the edge of the table. He was close enough that you could feel his shaky breath against your soaked folds. A shudder ran through your body. Maybe it was good you couldn’t really see him. You already knew you enjoyed the sight of him on his knees too much.

Suddenly, you felt light kisses trailing up your thigh, getting closer and closer to where you wanted him. “Want to make you feel good,” Jungkook softly sighed. “Just want to make someone feel good.” It was quiet, and you only just picked it up before Jungkook buried himself between your thighs.

You were certainly unprepared. Your mind was too fuzzy, all you knew was you needed to feel him. But your assumption about his lack of experience was once again proved to be incorrect.

Jungkook instantly got to work pleasing your body, planting soft kisses along the expanse of your inner thighs, growing closer until you whined when he kissed between your soaked folds. You had to swallow back a moan when you felt his tongue licking run up your slit. He was eager and didn't hold back once he found your clit. You groaned, feeling the tentative patterns he drew around the bud, skilled, knowing exactly what to do to have you seeing stars already.

“Fuck.” You wanted to scream, cry out, do something. The fact you couldn’t, turned you on in a way that confused you, but also frustrated you to no end. 

Your hand raked through his hair, moving him closer and making sure he didn’t pull away anytime soon. You knew you could cum from this if he kept at it long enough. You never knew how much a little foreplay could rile you up, but for some reason you found yourself close to the edge already, even though he’d barely started. 

Jungkook really didn’t need to do too much to affect you, but he was such an eager boy, desperate to please, and he wanted to give you the full experience despite the dwindling time you had before someone would start questioning where you both were. 

Jungkook pulled away slightly and replaced his tongue with enthusiastic fingers, going back to pumping you with two, and tears pricked your eyes when he managed to fit in a third. 

“Oh! Fu-oh,” you cried, and Jungkook couldn’t help but think the sounds you made were the hottest thing he’d ever heard.

Yuri wasn’t loud— Jungkook never knew how to take it, whether that meant he was doing a good job or not or if she was just on the quieter side. The only reason why he didn’t go crazy thinking it must be because he was terrible was because it was the only regular aspect of their sex lives. But with you, he decided he preferred the cute way you tried your best to keep quiet, but occasionally when he’d touch you just right, you’d make these adorable squeaks.

Your hand had found its way into his hair again, and with the way you held him close, you were practically fucking yourself against his tongue. You were a little rough, your grip tight, but he liked the way it stung. Your desperation was affecting him and he just wanted to make you feel good. He liked the way you were using him. It felt good to be used, needed, wanted, even if it was just for a second. 

He was sloppy, not bothering to try and keep things classy. His mouth was practically covered in your arousal, but he loved it. You tasted amazing. Seeing you like this was amazing. Even though it was dark, he could see the way your eyebrows were furrowed by the faint glow coming through the cracks in the door. You were breathtaking. It made the strain in his slacks worsen, seeing you turn into a mess the longer he kept going. He was hardly keeping it together as it was. You probably felt it before he even dropped to his knees. He was hard, but he had to keep it together. This was about you, only you. 

What would Yuri say if she knew how riled up he was getting even after you already gave him so much? She would be disappointed and so would you. He’s been so selfish. He just had to make you feel good—

Jungkook hoped you wouldn’t notice, but he was crying again. One tear fell, then two, then they just wouldn’t stop. 

Jungkook groaned into your pussy, a mix of frustration and delight. You were so good, he had to be good for you too. And that seemed to be what it took to get you to start hurdling off the edge.

“Koo— Jungkook— fuck— fuck— close.” Your feeble attempts at being quiet were all in vain as your desperation grew for sweet release. 

Jungkook was somehow able to make sense of your whimpering and quickly picked up the pace. He hastily switched back to using his mouth and wanted more than anything for you to finish on his tongue. 

He was back with his skilled tongue, and your sensitivity brought you to the edge all too quickly. Jungkook focused on your bundle of nerves again, going from tracing to sucking to the point that you were a writhing mess in his arms. Your thighs tightened around his face, your grip in his hair growing tighter, making him groan out, the pleasure and pain a combination that made the ache somehow even worse. You were shaking in his grasp, your hushed whines growing more incoherent, and oh— he wanted to see you cum. 

He felt like he could cum all over again. Embarrassing.

It wasn’t long after that Jungkook watched with eager eyes as you fell apart on his tongue. Wave after wave of pleasure kept hitting you. Jungkook helped you ride it out, easing up a bit, but staying close. You felt like you were riding on cloud nine, and for a second you even forgot where you were. The little closet disappeared, the company building disappeared, maybe the whole world vanished, leaving your mind in a state of bliss. It was just you and Jungkook and the overwhelming blissful end he gave you.

It took more than a moment for you to recover, your ragged breathing filling the space as you tried to pull yourself together. Jungkook eventually pulled away when you started to whine from the overstimulation.

It had never felt like that before. You could only imagine what type of pleasure he’d bring you under better conditions. This was going to be a problem. This was going to have to end one day, and you couldn’t get too attached.

After some time, Jungkook shakily rose to his feet. His body felt like it was on fire. You had nearly made him cum as he watched you reach your peak, it was too hot seeing you like that. Normally someone who’s always so put together and neat, you looked like a complete mess, and it just reaffirmed his earlier concern that, in fact, he enjoyed seeing you like that.

Horrible, wasn’t it?

Jungkook could hardly look away, his body screaming out to have you. The thought of walking out when he felt like this was unbearable, but this was about you, this needed to be about you. He didn’t want to disapp—

Then all of a sudden, your hands were on his shoulders, pulling him closer in an instant. He was back between your legs, and before he could question it any further, you were pulling him in for a fervent kiss. 

You seemed not to care that he was still covered in your juices and Jungkook had to fight back the urge to buck into you like a wild animal at the thought. Yuri hated when he tried to kiss her afterward, she hated kissing him anyways.

He settled into it, one hand on your waist, the other lightly cupping your cheek. As much as he was trying to control himself, you made it impossible with the way your hands raked over his body, the thread of self-control he tried to maintain for your sake quickly withered away. With each second, he grew closer, to the point you were pressed right against each other. You could certainly feel it now, the way his body pleaded for yours. Jungkook had to quickly pull away, his eyes growing watery all over again. 

“Wait!” He cried. He didn’t want to stop. He didn’t want to at all. He could see your confusion in the darkness.

“This was about you— I promised— I—” It hurt so badly. He wanted you so badly.

You relaxed at his words. 

“Well, I want you, so—” You started to rationalize, but Jungkook wasn’t having it.

“But—”

Instead of going back and forth and letting this turn into a long discussion, you decided to take action instead. Your hands found their way to his belt and quickly started to undo the strap. His breath was heavy as the buckle jingled when you finally managed to get it undone, and you didn’t give him any time to process before you went for his pants next and reached in to pull him out.

Jungkook groaned into your shoulder, feeling your hand wrap around his length. You lightly ran your hand down to the base and then back up, tracing your thumb along his leaky tip.

“Oh— oh— oh!” You were making it so hard for him. It was cruel. “I’ll wait, I’ll…I’ll…” The words were for himself more than you. He needed to keep himself in line, he had to.

“Mmmm, you certainly don’t feel like you want to wait,” you chuckled breathlessly. It was only meant to be a light tease, but you felt him shaking. His soft sniffles let you know he was actually crying.

“I’m sorry…” he sobbed. He felt like he had disappointed you. His body had betrayed him in a way that made Yuri scream at him anytime he tried to pull her close afterward. He wasn’t in control, he should be better than this, she’d always say. 

“Jungkook, didn't you hear me earlier? I said I wanted you.” Instead of the degradation he was expecting, the softness of your voice as you pulled him a little closer melted him in your grasp. You couldn’t even imagine the things he’d been told that would make him think this way.

You couldn’t really see it, but Jungkook was staring at you wide-eyed. For some reason, he was having issues processing your words. They just didn’t make sense. He had already taken too much, hadn’t he? But the simple thought of you wanting more had him subtly moving his cock within your grip.  

“Do you want to do this?” You asked when you noticed his movement. 

Despite your confession earlier, Jungkook found it hard to admit how much he wanted to fuck you. You took it upon yourself to help him, bringing his tip to your soaked folds and letting it run through your arousal. 

“Fuck— Y/n!” he whined. It instantly got a reaction from him, his need soaring beyond all reason. He couldn’t think straight anymore, and all he could focus on was the thought of finally slipping inside you again, just like he’d been imagining over the last few days.

“Do you want this?” You repeated, still so soft. Not a demand that he had to fulfill, but a genuine question asking if he wanted more from this. 

For a second, he didn’t answer, the sound of his breathing growing more labored as you ran his cock up and down your slick. He couldn’t answer. You felt so good and he was trying his best to get back in control, to not be so weak as Yuri would always say, but you made it so hard. 

He wanted to fuck you, and he probably would have pushed into you right then and there if suddenly he didn’t remember something.

“I— I still don’t have any condoms with me,” Jungkook cried, tears slipping down his cheeks as he fell into your shoulder. Fuck— how was he going to walk away from this?

“We don’t need one— I’m still on the pill, remember?” You pulled him away so you could look him in the eye. “If you’re ok with it, we could continue, but if you’re not comfortable doing that again, that’s completely fine.” You smiled, and there was genuine concern behind your gaze.

Jungkook normally wasn’t the risky type when it came to sex. He barely had sex enough for a habit like that to even be established, but with Yuri he was always so careful. She would never forgive him for even taking the chance of getting her pregnant, and he didn’t want it either. Not when he was like this, clinging to life by only a few short strands. With Yuri, he made sure things were right no matter his desperation, but with you… Once was risky enough, the heat of emotions causing protection to completely slip his mind. He had remembered this time, but after hearing your reassurance, his usual caution was thrown to the wind and all he could care about was feeling you.

In a haste, Jungkook took it upon himself to finally guide his cock into your warmth, moving your hand out of the way while he grabbed his length and finally slipped it into your slick hole. He watched your expression intently as it turned from surprise into bliss, pleasure overtaking your features, and you just looked so pretty. It made his desperation worse as your tight warmth enveloped him. You were so wet; he slipped in so easily, like you needed him just as badly as he needed you. 

Jungkook had to fight back the urge to sob. After so many days of playing your night together over and over in his head, his imagination could never compare to how good you felt in real life. Despite his earlier indulgence, Jungkook had to fight tooth and nail to deter himself from filling you up right away. You had had to deal with that once already, he couldn’t disappoint you— not again. The fact that you were even doing this with him was gracious enough. He couldn’t keep putting you through his failures.

Jungkook tried to slow his breathing down while he waited for you to get adjusted and for himself to calm down enough to move without instantly blowing his load. Even now, you were making it difficult in the way you were squeezing around him, and he already knew he wouldn’t last very long no matter how hard he tried.

You noticed he was tense and planted a few kisses across his cheeks, but Jungkook pushed your face so your lips would finally meet his again, engaging in another passionate kiss that only made you squeeze somehow even tighter around him.

Jungkook broke the kiss and let out something between a groan and a whine. “Fuck— fuck— I—” He wasn’t entirely sure he wasn’t just going to cum right then and there. Embarrassing.

“I’m sorry— so sorry.” He cried. “I don’t think I’ll make it very long…” You would probably want nothing to do with him after this.

You went back to kissing his cheeks. “Don’t stress, ok? Fuck me how you want to, don’t hold back for me.” Your warm smile could be seen even in the darkness. You looked like an angel…

Your words set a fire inside him. Fuck me how you want to— you were far too nice for someone as pathetic as he was. But as shameful as it was, he enjoyed your sympathy.

Jungkook didn’t hold back anymore and finally started moving his hips. You both moaned, but quickly realized the volume of your mistake, pulling each other into another kiss instead. You both swallowed each other's cries amidst the sounds of clothes ruffling, and the wet, slick sound of his quickening pace pumping into your heat. The table you were sitting on started to creak with his hurried struggle to properly feel you again.

Jungkook rolled his hips in a way that made your toes curl and had you struggling to keep quiet. He was good, settling into a nice, rhythmic roll after a few desperate thrusts in the beginning. His size filled you up in all the right places, a satisfying stretch that you could more than just grow used to. 

It wasn’t long before you both had turned into a tangled mess of limbs trying to feel each other. Jungkook had buried himself in your shoulder. Kissing you grew impossible. Instead, he cried out as silently as he could into your skin. 

He managed to delay his release for longer than he had expected, but the rush still came on quicker than he would have liked. 

“Close!” He whined as quietly as he could before picking up the pace. He couldn’t last much longer with the way you were squeezing around him. It was all too much, and before he could even try and hold it back any longer, his hips stilled and he filled you up with everything he could give.

Jungkook quickly pulled you into a kiss as his hand made its way between your bodies, and his fingers hastily found your clit again. He started making hurried motions around the bud until you were clinging onto his shoulders while your next orgasm surged through your body. You both were out of breath as the heat of the moment began to simmer down. It was the first moment he was finally able to think clearly again. There was one half of him that looked at you with the utmost admiration, someone far too kind to be messing with him. He never thought he could get enough of you. Then there was the other half…

The post-bliss clarity made him look at the situation as it truly was. He was cheating. This had truly turned into cheating. He’d betrayed Yuri’s trust, and there was nothing he could ever do to regain it. He didn't deserve to. But as horrible as it was, Jungkook found himself wanting to do it with you all over again, to have you in his arms so the world would melt away and he could just indulge. 

But unfortunately, the other half looked at you with the same shame and disgust he held for himself. All you were now was a reminder of how horrible of a person he’d become, and he couldn’t stand it.  

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[mechaknight-98]

Beastmaster Bond IV (NSFW) Ft Chaehyun

Author’s note: A bit of an interlude. I saw the dress and thought. I absolutely have to do a Gala Chapter. You all can blame @somicutie08 for the intro

"I don't know Tiger I am just worried ya know," I said to Chaehyun as she wrapped her tongue around my cock. I groan at her excellent skills, as she massages my balls after a deep gag. She always seems to hit that one spot on my scrotum that makes me cum buckets every time she gives me a blow job. She looked at me with her sad pout and my heart softened because I couldn't ever tell her no.

"Rexy you just hatched a Deviljho single-handedly while everyone was stuck out of town, Facing your peers in a Gala should be easy," Chaehyun said.

I wince because she's right but dealing with people it's not the move man.

"I know I should be but that crowd is not my crowd," I responded. Chaehyun smiled and said,

"That's why you need to show up beside me, You wouldn't leave me alone would you,"

My eyes narrowed at my paramour, and her eyes widened with arousal. she loved playing into my possessive nature as it always served to get her so wet and typically gave into whatever demand she had

"I'd never," I growled. Chaehyun smiled and then said

"Great so we fly out in two and a half weeks. We will need to get you a suit here." she smiled at me knowing she had trapped me so elegantly.

“Oh, tiger before I forget I need to talk to you about something important,” I say and before I finish I feel Chaehyun’s anxiety spike. She looks at me with her scared puppy dog eyes and she does the thing she always does when she's anxious she fucks me feral until both of us black out and pass out.

The next day I woke up before her and I stared at her. She looked so peaceful but also so sexy. I caress her side as she rests and watch as she turns over to look at me with a sultry look that sets my loins on a blaze.

“Hey Rex you ready for the next round,” she says seductively.

“While I would love nothing more than to lock you in a mating press right now I think we should talk. I want to preface this by saying upfront. Nothing is wrong with us. It's just that something has happened to me and I want…no think you should know.

Chaehyun stiffens her erect nipples and stares at me as she does and she begins the lewdest display yet. She opens her legs and begins to play with herself in front of me.

"Okay Rexy but after you fill me up," she says seductively.

Tired of this game I respond with, "No I need to talk to you!"

Chaehyun looks into my eyes and moves towards me.

"Please Rexy right after my worthless pussy needs you. Aren't you gonna fill your worthless barren cumdump?" she asks. Her choice of words is concerning because I know she has been super sensitive about being barren recently.

"Chaehyun look it's not about that I..." Was all I could get out before she was on me like a predator cornering its prey. She was kissing me and pushing all my erogenous zones hoping I would discard my concerns. What she didn't count on (and to be honest neither did I. Was my lust and protectiveness combining.)

"Listen here you slut. You are a dirty slut, but you are so much more than just a cumdump. You are my mate, mine to abuse, but you do not get to talk down to yourself as only some worthless sex object. Now you are going to listen to what I have to say then I am going to breed your pretty pusy do I make myself clear slut?" I growl and command. Chaehyun's mewls as she submits to me. My Lust and protectiveness still lead me to continue. "Do you understand Slut?" I growl in a low tone, "Or will I have to leave you untouched." That sent Chaehyun out of her stupor as she nodded.

"Good. now observe." I said as I showed her the flame wisps. Her eyes went wide when she saw them, but before either of us could talk I flipped her and bent her over taking my hard cock and plunging it deep into her pussy. it was sodden and dripping a puddle under her which made entry easy because this was the most molded and fit to my dick she has ever been. I grab her pillowy tits and begin slow and power thrusts into her cunt.

"Good Girl," I cooed as ravaged her. Her moans are an excellent motivator.

"Wait, Dino. We need to talk about..." Chaehyun began. I quickly cut her off.

"You wanted me to fuck you first, you got me all riled up and I am finishing. I am breeding you and you are going to bear me children." I growled as I continued to piston into her pleasant pussy. her slick drenched my cock as I claimed her. I felt her body tense, any time I mention breeding her, her body goes into this weird but sexy catatonic state where her body milks me for all I am worth. growing tired of doggy I pull out lift her tiny body onto the bed pin her legs up above her ears and put her into mating press.

"Oh God, Breed me," Chaehyun moans. I continue to piston as her cavern squelches and tightens around me. her lower lips drool for me in a lewd mirror of the upper ones as I feel something change about this time. I can't think about it too long as I get caught up in the moment and lose control exploding into her pussy. My orgasm is violent and long as I feel like I am cumming in her for hours (it was 7 or so minutes) but I keep pounding into her. My only thought was filling her with my seed. Chaehyun moans as she climaxes calms down and climaxes again through my orgasm as I just continue to dump rope after rope after rope of cum inside her. My brain is both clear and mush at the same time when the haze of lust finally clears. Chaehyun looks at me satiated and full.

"What happened to you? You never do that?" she said

"You did that. You talking bad about yourself made me angry and horny."

"Well, maybe I should degrade myself more often because fuck, you have never cum this much." I shake my head and get back to the bed to hold her close by spooning her. She looks at my face her eyes widen.

"Oh that changed you, I changed you," she said. she grabs her phone and opens the camera and my eyes have this intense teal sclera that permeates around them. Chaehyun giggled, before saying, "Okay enough cuddles we have work we need to do." I nod and get ready for the day.

over the next week, we prepare for the Gala and I start noticing things about Chaehyun. her energy is sapped a lot easier. she is a lot more aggressive with others and snippy including with me, but also her need to fuck is increased as well, she is almost always demanding more sex. I've had to now spend entire lunch breaks just to satisfy her in addition to our morning and night rituals, and I am worried. thankfully though it doesn't cloud her judgment as she has been excellent in handling the zoo with me and making sure everything is running smoothly, and as we approach the time of the Gala her focus diverts to that.

she's taking the spearhead on most of it so I just stay in the background letting her do her thing. On one of the nights, I managed to get some time and talk to Tony.

"Hey little bro," I greet him after the zoo closes.

Tony "smiles" as he greets me but his head tilts.

"You're mate where is she?"

"She is getting things ready for an event she wants us to go to, so I figured I talk to you as she has been consuming my time a lot lately,"

"Is that wise because she is with child?" Amaterasu (She was also there cuddling with Tony.) I blink repeatedly processing what I just heard

"Oh and how do you know this?" I ask my two Magnamalo friends.

"She is going through the shift," Tony clearly says, "As have you," he adds.

I nod and then say, "Okay then I will go address that right now."

For those unaware megafauna *who only pair-bond once* (specifically females) go through a shift when they become pregnant the first time. Essentially the hormones that promote breeding triple in and their bodies become a baby-making factory for 4 cycles of gestation. this means that typically for those 3-5 years of gestation, all they want to do is breed and nurse their babies and breed again. they become hostile to any nonmale that is a non-mate or familial tie, and other females. (More so to other females) I never considered this though because she was missing the key symptom. lactation

I arrive home to tell her the news and when I arrive and open the door I smell her before I see her. I also smell the smell of cookies but more so the scent of her arousal. to me, it smells like what my brain associates comfort which is smores. her scent drives me wild I feel my cock strain in my pants as I quickly close the door. the sound of squelching in the distance is all I hear along with banshee-level moans.

"Tiger," I call out slightly frightened as to what could be waiting for me in our apartment. the response is bone-chilling.

I hear a growl and the scent begins to become even more intense.

"Rexy left me all alone, and now he's back. Rexy is going to be a good boy and let his tiger ride him right?" her voice takes on a tone I have never heard. somewhere between sultry and wildly deranged. it's as sexy as it is tense. Her eyes have the same teal sclera as mine and she radiates this intense sexual aura that is intense, to say the least. my body gives in to her demands as she approaches. My cock becomes painfully hard and starts to dump arousal into my blood. my mind begins to cloud but I try to fight it.

"Hey Tiger is everything okay?" I ask meekly.

"Yeah. I just was making cookies with ice cream because I have been having all these random cravings and just this desire for my man hit me. I couldn't help it. I have been fucking myself for hours but I can't cum. So I am going to need you and that dick of yours to finish me off." I look behind her to see a trail of her slick on the floor. She brings her hands to my head and lowers my head to be even with hers. she looks me in the eyes, and I see her eyes have become slits her pupils a dark crimson color.

"Don't worry Rexy Mommy will take good care of you," she whispers. I feel my body starting to burn arousal too. I had something I needed to tell her something important, but my memory was fading fast.

"My Rexy is trying so hard to think right now," she says as she strokes my cock. (Wait when did I get naked, when did she get on top of me? When did we get to our bedroom?)

as if hearing my thoughts Chaehyun said, "Rexy don't fight it. Mommy just wants to help her, so please give in." her words sent me over the edge and I blacked out.

The next day I woke up with my collar covered in hickeys and my back with scratch marks. My dick is still rock hard though as I look down at it I scold it.

"Can you go down would you?" but it remains hard nonetheless. I smell bacon and other breakfast foods as I get up and put some boxers on. I walk to the kitchen where Chaehyun only has an apron on, while she cooks breakfast.

"Hey, Daddy. thanks for last night you were an animal." Chaehyun said.

"I groaned and replied, "Well at least you remembered it and enjoyed it. I don't remember anything." Chaehyun smiled before saying

"You came in me four times and passed out after the fifth, but I need another round." she cooed. at that point, the brain fog cleared and I was able to tell Chae.

"Um, Tiger I think you're going through the shift," I state calmly. Chae looks at me and licks her lips

"Um, I don't think so. I am not lactating, and my sex drive hasn't increased. we fuck the same amount." She said as she was actively looking at my crotch and licking her lips. I let that slide and go for a different approach because I know if I press the issue it's going to awaken both of our prey drives and it will evolve into an argument and lead to us fucking for hours on end. We had stuff to do today and I couldn't afford to get behind. Our flight to Korea was tonight. Containing her would be exceptionally difficult. So I play her game

"Okay, do you need any help?"

"Oh thanks, Rexy but no I am pretty much done."

"Okay, I will start the dishes then."

Chaehyun smiles. She knows I hate doing them so she's pleasantly surprised I decide to. As I do the dishes Chaehyun comes from behind and lowers my boxers. My hard cock is quickly caressed by her soft hands.

"Chaehyun, please. We need to pack."

"No we need to fuck then we can pack," she says as she caresses me with her other hand.

"My marks are still present good. that will let them know you're mine," she says luridly. I groan as one of my major verbal pleasure points is her claiming me as hers.

"God yes!" I moan. "I am yours and yours alone," I affirm. Chaehyun tightens her grip on me.

"Good boy I am glad you know your place. by my side, or in me." she cooed while stroking me.

Her arousal is beginning to overwhelm my brain again. I can't afford to black out here but I want nothing more than just to breed her again and again and again. I feel her take off the apron and feel her soft body press into mine.

“Stop fighting it, join me. I know you feel the need as much as I do. Your rationality just makes you fight it. Give in to your instincts and let the animal out,” my mate whispers as she strokes me slowly. “Please I want you with me not the repressed blackout you. I want my intelligent and savage mate to ravage me. not my arousal-drunk partner,” she whispers and her hands wrap around my body, I try to stay focused but it's hard.

“Rexy embrace it stop fighting it please let it take you. You need it.” Chaehyun encourages and I start to feel my body heat up uncontrollably. I see the wisps begin to float around me.

“That's it babe be at peace with an animal inside don't fight it. Let your mind clear and your instincts guide you.” Chaehyun encourages I feel my mind breaking as this weird combination of ideas spill and proliferate through my mind

“Stop fighting give in,” Chaehyun cooed as her voice and hands got braver. My breathing hitches as I feel her envelope me,

“Don't black out stay with me Rexy embrace your instincts,” Chaehyun says as she has me nearing the edge, but before I can freefall she stops touching me. I turn and scowl at her. She smiles as she eats her breakfast. My throbbing cock is dripping precum as I stare at her enticing body. My brain is left overwhelmed by the myriad of thoughts and emotions I feel.

Chaehyun smirks at my discomfort as she takes another bite of her food she says, “We aren't leaving until you fuck me. Not your body, not your mind, not your dick. I'm not leaving until you give me all of you. I know it is hard to bear oneself to another but I need my mate to stop hiding. Show me who you truly are. I won't run.” her lurid whispers echo her words deep into my mind and psyche as aspects of my personality resonate in an almost supernatural hum. Chaehyun finished her plate and sauntered over to me. She caresses my face and gazes into my eyes,

“Come on Rexy aren't you tired of holding back,” and the mental barricade between my primal self and rational self breaks. I kiss her fervently as I lift one of her legs so that I can get a better angle on plowing her pussy and she wraps it around my torso. She smiles

“There he is,” she moans as I impale her on my cock. Her greedy pussy happily accepts though as she drips. She moans sweetly as I slowly plunge deeper and deeper inside. Her hands dig into my back as she tries to anchor herself from the intense pleasure building inside of her.

“You like that? You like how my cock owns your pussy so much that you have to tear me apart,” I groan as I finally bottom out inside of her. She smiles and says,

“Yes, more than anything now fill me with your cum!” I start thrusting into her deeper and harder than I ever have before and I watch her just lose herself to the pleasure. I smirk at her convulsing body as she spasms around my cock.

“You like it,” I ask smugly

“Yes, yes, yes. I can feel you hitting my womb,” she answers. I grin madly as I flood her insides with my seed and she moans overwhelmed. After our little session, we shower together and pack. Throughout the day we mate some more as Chaehyun insists on prancing around nude because she can't get enough of me, but alas we have to stop so we can catch our plane. It sucks because I was balls deep inside of her when my alarm went off.

Chaehyun glares at me as I pull out but I merely say, “Look you wanted to go on this trip. I didn't. I'm more than happy to cancel and fuck you till you're stuffed like a turkey.” I see Chaehyun’s mind fight her body as she is super enticed by the idea. I see her moan as she considers it but her mind wins out and we grab a ride to the airport.

“Ugh, why can't I say no to you,” I groan to Chaehyun who smiles before saying,

“I don't know why you thought you could beat a girl from Busan,” I laugh and kiss her cheek as we settle into the bed on the plane.

Chaehyun smiled and demanded another kiss and another and additional after that before taking my face and smashing our lips together. When she breaks it I see a familiar glint in her eye.

“No, we are not doing that I say before turning over and going to sleep next to her. Chaehyun groans annoyed.

[daisynik7]

Win a Date with Takada-Chan! Part I

Pairing: Aoi Todo x f!reader

Rating: Mature

Word Count: ~4.6k

cw: reader described as having hair, reader has curves, suggestive dialogue, sexual tension, explicit language

Summary: You win a very exclusive contest to join in a group date with Takada-Chan! You’re able to bring a guest, but Sara is busy that day. Who else can you ask? None other than your fake boyfriend Aoi Todo. 

Author’s Notes: Here’s chapter five, enjoy! Thanks for the support on this so far, I really appreciate it. Divider credit to @/saradika. 

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After recounting to Sara all that was said between you and Todo, her first response is, “What the fuck?!” She grabs your two braided pigtails to twirls the ends in your face. “This was all said right in front of me and Yuji?!” You nod sheepishly to confirm. The two of you are waiting at the bus stop, heading back to your place from Club Coffee. After seeing Todo pull you forward to whisper in your ear, your best friend is naturally very curious at what was said. 

“I told you he was a perv, but I guess you are too. Naughty girl,” she teases, still tugging on one of your braids. 

You cover your face with your hands, embarrassed. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“You liked that he was checking you out! You like him!”

“I don’t like him!” you protest. “I don’t even know him!”

“But you’re attracted to him. You can’t deny that.” She stares at you with a brow raised, waiting for you to confess. God, you hate it when she’s right. She always rubs it in your face.

In a quiet voice, you mumble, “Yeah, I’m attracted to him.”

Sara snaps her fingers as if she just solved a case. “I knew it, I fucking knew it! You were in such denial the other day. Now you can drop this stupid act and just fuck already!”

“I don’t think he’s attracted to me.”

“He was staring at your ass all day. And he told you he likes it rough and wants to show you. What do you call that?”

“He was only saying those things to mess with me since I was messing with him! Also, I’m sure if someone put a mini skirt on an inflatable banana, that man would still check out its ass.” You pause to take a deep sigh. “Also, you’re forgetting the most important thing: He’s in love with Takada-Chan. I mean, the dude is already planning their wedding.”

Sara snorts, rolling her eyes. “I can’t believe you’re attracted to this guy.”

You groan loudly. “I know! What is wrong with me?!”

“Well, it’s pretty clear he’s whipped for Takada-Chan, so there’s nothing that can be done about that. We’ll have to think of something else.”

“We don’t have to think of anything else. It’s not like I’m in love with him or anything. I’m just attracted to him. That’s it. I’ll just have to get over it eventually, which I probably will as soon as he opens his big dumb mouth the next time I see him.”

“Look at you, already looking forward to the next time you see him,” Sara says, smirking. 

You can’t believe your sudden feelings for him. Can you even call these feelings? It’s just physical attraction, right? Sure, his confidence is sexy, despite how annoying he can be most of the time. And you know he’s loyal, given his dedication to Takada-Chan. That is something you can respect. You remind yourself that this man hasn’t really done anything nice for you. All the interactions you’ve had together have been argumentative and combative, constantly trying to one up each other. Were there hints of sexual tension here and there? Maybe. But at the end of the day, there isn’t a reason for you to have feelings for Todo, besides your physical attraction to him. You barely know anything about him. 

Whatever this is, you decide the best way to move forward is to drop this silly back-and-forth you constantly have with him. Today, he was mature enough to apologize and call a truce, but you decided to take a little bit of revenge anyways. It was petty of you to make suggestive comments in an attempt to embarrass him. It also didn’t work since he landed the final blow. 

The next time you see him, you make a promise to yourself to be nice, as you normally would. Maybe your feelings for him will become clearer.

~~~ Todo walks beside Yuji towards the train station, hands in his pocket, reflecting. There’s a fluttering in his stomach as he recalls his rival, basically whispering sweet nothings into his ear. I’ll keep the skirt on while you show me how rough you like it.

Holy shit. His cheeks burn red just thinking about it. Todo never surrenders, but in that moment, he had to. He was so tempted to grab her by the hand and take her up on her offer. No woman has ever said anything like that to him. The few he has been with never engaged in dirty talk. Is he realizing just now how much he’s into it? Because damn, he is really into it. His imagination runs wild with thoughts of her straddling him in that fucking mini skirt, her braids bouncing with every movement, giggles and moans escaping from that cute smile of hers.

Holy shit, seriously, he needs to calm down.

“Today was fun!” Yuji’s voice snaps Todo out of his extremely inappropriate subconscious. 

Todo chuckles. “Yeah, it was.”

“You and your rival seem to be getting along better,” Yuji says, with a smirk. 

“Yeah, I guess.”

After a long pause, Yuji asks, “So…are we not going to talk about how you were totally checking her out?”

Todo scoffs. “What’s there to talk about?”

“I don’t know, Todo. You seem pretty smitten.” His brother tries his best to hold in his laughter. 

“I’m not smitten. Don’t be so stupid, brother. It’s not that deep.”

“I just haven’t seen you gawk at someone like that in a while. Other than Takada-Chan, of course.”

Todo whips her head towards Yuji and glares at him. “Now you’re really sounding ridiculous, brother. You know I only have eyes for sweet, precious Takada-Chan.” Yuji chuckles and doesn’t press on the matter further. Todo continues to contemplate in silence. 

It’s not like he is truly committed to Takada-Chan the rest of his life. He may be eccentric and delusional, but he’s not an idiot. He knows deep, deep down that the pop idol and him will never be together. Just as he knows that she never rejected him and that they never even went to middle school together. Deep into the abyss of his being, he knows this is all a fabrication. But he likes living in his little fantasy world of his. He needs it. It gives him something to look forward to, even if it is all pretend. It’s something hopeful. Something positive. Being a Jujutsu Sorcerer is a dangerous job. He knows he puts his life at risk every mission. The reality of his world is harsh, what harm is it to play pretend and hope for something fun in his life? 

He's never had long term relationship. Sure, he’s hooked up with a few different women here and there. It never led to anything serious. Is that even something he wants? A serious relationship? What does that even mean to Todo? 

The biggest cause of stress for him is boredom. Maybe he values a relationship that keeps him on his toes. He likes a woman who can keep up with him. And he isn’t the type of man that is easy to keep up with. When he thinks about his “rival”, he realizes that all their interactions are never boring. He likes her fiery attitude towards him. She doesn’t back down from a fight, even if she knows she’s outmatched. Todo can be an intimidating person, though it doesn’t seem to faze her. 

He knows she’s capable of being nice. She put on the whole act of pretending to be a couple to get Takada-Chan’s attention. Because of her, Todo’s dream of meeting the idol and getting her to know his name came true. She also gave him the signed poster. He still wonders why she did all of that. Is it because she cares for him? A stranger? A stranger who has always been an ass to her? That would be crazy, right? 

Today, he’s seen her naughty side. He knows she said those things to provoke him, but holy shit. It was hot. And it wasn’t just because of the outfit she was wearing. The confidence in which she said it was enticing. The way she touched his thigh, knowing it would rile him up. It’s like she knows what gets him going. 

And what compelled him to whisper those parting words to her? We’ll just have to reschedule. He wanted to get the last say, he wanted the upper hand. But that’s not all it was. Part of him meant it, wanted it. Maybe he still wants it.

She can be naughty, and she can be nice. He’s seen a little bit of both those sides of her. It intrigues him. He likes it. He wants to see more. 

~~~

A week after Takada-Chan’s birthday, the pop idol’s official website releases details on a new contest: Win a Date with Takada-Chan! There will be five winners selected and they can bring a guest. The “date” consists of a party bus ride with Takada-Chan from a predetermined meeting spot to a studio location. At the studio, the lucky guests get a behind the scenes look at an official Takada-Chan photoshoot. After the photoshoot, Takada-Chan will treat her guests to an exclusive private dinner at her favorite sushi restaurant in Tokyo. 

It all seems too good to be true. A whole day with the Takada-Chan? Incredible.

To enter the contest, you must submit a photo of yourself showing how big of a fan you are. Then you must write a little blurb about why you would love to win the contest. You decide to submit the photo of you, Todo, and Takada-Chan doing the Taka-tan Beam in her dressing room. In your description, you write about how much you admire Takada-Chan for her talent, confidence, and overall bright persona. 

The winners are announced two weeks after. Miraculously, you are one of them. You cannot believe your luck. The pop idol gods have blessed you, indeed. 

You tremble with excitement as you speed dial Sara on your phone. 

“Hey! What’s up?” she answers.

“You’ll never believe it. I won the contest!” 

“Are you serious?! Holy shit! Congratulations!”

“And I get a guest! You’re coming with me!”

“Sounds good. When is it?”

“Next Saturday.”

“Next Saturday?”

“Yes!”

“Dude, we’re hosting a huge party at the restaurant. I won’t be able to make it, I’m serving.”

You frown to yourself. “Aw man. Okay. I guess I’ll have to find someone else.”

You hear your best friend snickering in the background, but she doesn’t say anything.

“What are you laughing about?” you ask. 

“You know exactly who you should bring.”

“No. No way.”

“He’s your fake boyfriend, don’t you think Takada-Chan will be suspicious if you don’t bring him?”

“I mean, I’ll make up some excuse. I’m not going to ask Todo.”

“Why not?! We’ve already established that you’re attracted to him. This will be another good opportunity to get to know him better! Or at least gauge how you really feel about him.”

You let out a loud sigh. “You really can’t make it?”

She laughs. “No, I can’t. Just ask Todo. Maybe you two can finally become friends and go to Takada-Chan events together instead of dragging me and Yuji to them.”

“Gasp. I’m hurt. I thought you loved going to Takada-Chan events with me!” you tease. 

“The reason I go to the events is because I love you. But Todo might be the answer to all my prayers. Who would have thought that giant mountain of a body would be my saving grace?”

“Ha ha, very funny. Fine. I’ll ask him,” you say, begrudgingly. Then you add, “And for the record, I love you too.”

You can hear your best friend smile through the phone. “Yeah, I know. Now go get your man.”

“Sara!”

~~~

Todo is in the middle of eating ramen when he looks at his phone to see a notification. It’s a text from someone named “Rival”. Why is she texting him?

He opens their message thread. Besides the new message he just received, the only thing on there is their photo with Takada-Chan. He almost forgot how cute this picture is. 

Rival: Hey, are you free next Saturday?

He drops his spoon in his soup bowl, reading the text slowly. His heart starts racing faster as he types out a response.

Todo: Yes. Why?

He sees the 3 dots. After a few more seconds, she texts back.

Rival: I won Takada-Chan’s date contest. Sara can’t make it, so I’m asking you. 

The contest! Win a Date with Takada-Chan! He entered that weeks ago and never got any response back. He assumed he wasn’t picked. She won?! He’s too excited to text. He presses the phone icon to call her. After a few rings, she picks up. “Todo?”

For some reason, hearing her say his name makes his heart skip a beat. His breath hitches for a millisecond before he responds, “Hey. Yeah, it’s me. You won the contest?”

She chuckles. “Yeah, I did.”

After a few moments of silence, Todo asks, “And you want to take me?”

“Well, Sara can’t make it. So, I figured the next best option would be Takada-Chan’s #2 fan.”

Todo grumbles. “I thought we were past this.”

She giggles. “Yeah yeah, I know, I’m just teasing you. So, are you down?”

“Hell yeah, I’m down. Just text me the details.”

“For sure. I’ll see you next week.”

They hang up and Todo completely abandons his ramen. He’s too thrilled to continue eating. A date with Takada-Chan? It’s official. All his dreams are coming true, minus marrying the pop idol. But he can live with that for now.

It was all thanks to her. His rival. Or maybe he should start calling her his acquaintance? Or friend? Were they even friends? All the thoughts he’s had of her these past two weeks have not been appropriate of someone intending to be just “friends”. It’s safe to say that Todo has not forgotten any part of their interaction at the café. It’s even safer to say that the memory of her outfit that day combined with her flirtatious demeanor lives in his mind rent free. 

Whatever these feelings are, he must contain them next week. All his attention will be on Takada-Chan, and that’s it. He’s determined not to be distracted by anything, or anyone, else. 

~~~

The day of Takada-Chan’s big group date finally arrives. The outfit you decide to wear today is simple: A lilac purple sweetheart dress that ends just right above your knees and white espadrille sandals. You wear a gold necklace with two interlocking circles. Sara has the exact same kind; you bought it as a matching set to symbolize your unwavering friendship, as cheesy as that sounds. 

The meeting location for the group date is about a 20-minute bus ride from your house. You texted Todo the location last week, right after you told him the news. You’re absolutely thrilled to spend the day with Takada-Chan, but also a little apprehensive being on the date with Todo. You’ve replayed your last encounter with him many times over in your mind. You haven’t been able to go a day without thinking about him. When you talked to him on the phone, it was normal. As if you two didn’t exchange sexually charged comments with each other just the other week. What will it be like today? 

You take a deep breath as the bus approaches your stop. Are you more nervous about seeing Takada-Chan or Todo? You can’t even tell. 

From the stop, you walk about five minutes to the meeting location. It’s an empty parking lot. From your understanding of today’s agenda, a party bus with Takada-Chan will pick you up at 1:00 PM. Currently, it’s 12:40 PM. 

The 4 other winners are already there with their plus ones. All of them are men. You laugh to yourself as Sara’s voice plays in your head. “Sausage-fest” is what she would say. 

You check your phone. 12:45 PM. Should you text him to see where he is?

A few minutes later, Todo arrives. He’s wearing a dark purple t-shirt with black joggers. The shirt hugs his body tightly, accentuating every muscle and ab on his rock-hard body. 

Wow, you think to yourself. This is the first time you’ve noticed his attire. Has he always worn outfits like this? He looks good. Really good. 

You swallow the drool that is currently pooling in your mouth as he approaches you. His expression is neutral when he first greets you. You catch him scanning up and down your body, observing you. Then he smirks. “You look good.”

There’s a tingling right below your belly. You take a deep breath before saying, “Thank you. You too.” 

He continues to smirk at you as you look directly into each other’s eyes. You gulp loudly, feeling shy. But you don’t want to look away from him. 

Suddenly, someone approaches you two. It’s one of the other winners of the contest. The rest of the winners follow closely behind him. “Hey.”

“Hello,” you respond. Something about the way they look at you doesn’t seem friendly. 

“Are you the ‘couple’ that Takada-Chan brought into her dressing room?” He puts air quotes around the word “couple”.

Todo steps closer to him, intimidating. “Yeah. What’s it to you?”

The guy smirks, then looks back at the other fans. “See guys, I knew it was all a fraud. Pathetic.”

You scowl at them and ask, “What the hell do you mean by that?”

The annoying guy lets out a malicious laugh before saying, “It’s pretty obvious you two aren’t a couple. You might have Takada-Chan fooled, but not us. We just think it’s pathetic that two fans would stoop so low.”

You hear Todo growling beside you. Not wanting the situation to escalate further, you say, “And what makes you think we aren’t a couple?” You link your arm around Todo’s, glaring at the asshole in front of you. 

“We’ve had reports from other fans saying they’ve seen you two at other events, just bickering and arguing with each other. Sometimes barely even speaking to each other.”

Todo snorts, snarling, “You guys are a bunch of nerds. I don’t give a shit what your ‘reports’ say. Stop harassing me and my girlfriend.” His use of the word “girlfriend” makes your heart skip a beat for some reason. Control yourself, woman! 

You tighten your grip on Todo’s arm and add, “Besides, you act like regular couples don’t fight and bicker. News flash: they do.”

“Well how come nobody has ever seen you kiss or hug like normal couples do?” Some of the guys behind him nod in agreement. 

Todo lets out an even louder snort and laughs. “Is this dude for real?”

This idiot was right on the money about you and Todo pretending to be in a relationship, but you would rather eat shit than admit it. At this point, you’ll do whatever it takes to convince these losers that you’re right and they’re wrong. If it’s a kiss they want, then so be it. 

You grip Todo by the collar and pull him down towards you. “If you perverts want to see a kiss, then fine. What do you say, baby?”

Todo seems taken aback by your sudden action. You desperately try to communicate to him telepathically. If you’re not cool with this, it’s okay, we don’t have to do it! But if you are, let’s prove these assholes wrong!

You see that familiar smirk on his lips as he says in that sexy low voice, “Yeah, let’s put on a show.” He leans down as you get on your tippy toes to close the gap. 

His lips are soft against yours. Not what you expected from a meathead like this. The kiss starts closed mouth, but then suddenly his tongue slide against your lips, begging for entrance. You part your lips just the tiniest bit to feel his tongue swirl around yours. You let out a small moan, involuntarily. 

You break the kiss immediately, Todo’s tongue still sticking out. His eyes are half-closed with a dazed look on his face. You turn away from him, face hot, and say to the crowd, “There. Are you losers happy? Now leave us alone.”

The group of men look at you, ashamed. You hear some of them grumble, “Sorry” as they turn to face away from you. The idiot who did the accusing grimaces at you, muttering, “Whatever.” What a fucking prick. 

With perfect timing, you see a black bus drive into the parking lot. Takada-Chan has arrived. 

You glance at Todo, who now has rosy cheeks. How cute. In a hushed voice, you say, “I’m sorry about that. I didn’t know how else to get those bastards to leave us alone.”

He doesn’t say anything. You can tell he’s trying to find his words carefully. Not wanting to prolong this awkward silence, you say, “Let’s just enjoy this date with Takada-Chan, okay?” You grab his hand and lead him in front of the black bus, which has just parked. You fall in line behind the other fans, not wanting to see their annoying faces. Todo’s hand is still around yours. You’re basically holding hands. 

Peering up at him, you whisper, “What are you doing?”

He clears his throat and whispers back, “We have to keep acting like a couple, right? Couples hold hands.” 

You look at him with a bewildered expression, but don’t argue. He’s right. You have to keep this whole act going. For those idiot fans, for Takada-Chan. That’s all it is, right? Just an act.

You adjust your grip so that you are interlocking fingers. This is more convincing. It’s more intimate. His hold around you is firm, his hand massive compared to yours. Oh, the things he could do to you with these hands…

The door to the bus opens and a security guard pops their head out. There’s a clipboard in his hand, presumably to check the list of winners and confirm their identities. Each winner and their guest steps into the bus, one by one. You hear squeals of joy as each fan enters and Takada-Chan greets them. When it’s your turn, the guard, who you now recognize as the same one at the Handshake Event and Meet and Greet, looks at you and Todo holding hands. He smiles and says, “Go ahead.” He didn’t even check for your ID. 

As you set foot in the bus, you see purple mood lighting on the ceiling and hear Takada-Chan’s music playing through the speakers. The pop idol is seated at the far end in her own booth. Two security guards surround her. When she sees you and Todo, she jumps up with excitement and walks towards you. “You’re here! When I found out you were the one selected, I got so excited!” She gives you a warm hug, which you return with your free arm. Todo still has a steady hold of your hand. You expected him to let go as soon as he saw Takada-Chan, but surprisingly, his grip has not loosened one bit. 

“Todo! So glad to see you here with your girlfriend!” Takada-Chan gives him a one-armed hug, which he returns silently. 

You can’t help but wonder what’s going on in his head right now. 

Takada-Chan leans in closer to whisper to you, “I wish you two could sit next to me, but these other fans sat there first. We’ll catch up later.” She gives you one last smile and a wink as she walks back to her seat. 

You and Todo sit in the free spot closest to the entrance of the bus. It’s a bit cramped with the two of you sitting side by side. Suddenly, Todo lets go of your hand and swings it around your shoulders, pulling you in closer to his body. Maybe he thought this would be a more comfortable position. 

He feels like a giant teddy bear, except he’s rippling with hard muscle. You’re so close that every time you breath, you inhale his scent. He smells like clean linen and ocean breeze. You turn your head slowly to face him, and to your surprise, his gaze is already on you. 

~~~

When she turns to face him, Todo can’t help but stare down at her lips, hungrily. He wants to continue where they left off. He wants to kiss her again, taste more of her on his tongue, make her moan once more against his mouth. She’s so close to him, he can smell the intoxicating scent of the shampoo in her hair. He’s about to go feral if he doesn’t try to contain himself. 

He swore to himself he wouldn’t let anybody distract him from today. But he didn’t expect to kiss his pretend girlfriend in front of all those dweebs. He also didn’t expect to like it. And boy, did he like it. 

His arm is still wrapped around her, holding her close. She looks so good today, in her little purple dress. The neckline plunges just enough to tease him, leaving the rest to his imagination. Her collarbones are titillating, he wants to plant wet kisses all over, marking them as his. She wears a dainty gold necklace, giving her a look of innocence that seems to turn him on even more.

She stares at him with wide eyes. Her mouth is moving but isn’t paying attention to what she’s saying. All he can think about is how sweet her lips are. He just has to lean down a little bit closer to get a taste. 

“Hey Todo, are you listening to me?” She raises her voice, which awakens him from his trance. 

“Huh?”

“I asked you if you’re okay. You look out of it.” There’s genuine concern in her eyes. She’s so cute. 

He smirks. “Yeah, I’m great. Are you okay?”

She smiles softly and rests her head against his chest. “Yeah, I’m good.”

Fuck fuck fuck, she’s so fucking cute. 

After a while, she looks back up at him and says, “Whatever we’re doing, it’s working. Looks like those idiots aren’t even paying attention to us anymore. As long as Takada-Chan still thinks we’re a couple, we should be in the clear.”

His heart sinks. He responds with a simple hum as she lays her head back against his chest. This is all just part of their elaborate scheme to get the pop idol’s attention. It’s nothing more than an act, right?

The ride to the studio is only fifteen minutes. She spends the whole trip leaning on his body. He prays that she can’t hear or feel his heart racing in his chest. Todo glances over at Takada-Chan, who is chatting away with the fans closest to her. She looks adorable as usual, but something feels different today. Not with her, but with the way he looks at her.

Takada-Chan has always been a silly little fantasy. Now he sits here with an actual reality laying on his chest. Someone interesting, someone he respects, someone tangible. 

She’s better than a dream girl like Takada-Chan. She’s real. 

Todo likes her. That’s the conclusion he comes to. He doesn’t want this to be pretend anymore. He wants to hold her, kiss her, get to know her better. He wants all the aspects of being in a relationship without it all being part of an act. 

He knows she might not feel the same way. She still thinks it’s all for show. Tonight, he’ll tell her how he feels. If she doesn’t feel the same way, then they’ll end this strange arrangement they have and he’ll leave her alone forever. Will it crush him? Maybe. But Todo is strong. He always bounces back. Plus, he’ll always have Takada-Chan. 

He really, really hopes there’s a chance she feels the same way. He doesn’t want to go back to fantasy.

[97keanu]

"ʸᵒᵘ ᵃʳᵉ ᵐʸ ᵃⁿᵍᵉˡ

ᶜᵒᵐᵉ ᶠʳᵒᵐ ʷᵃʸ ᵃᵇᵒᵛᵉ

ᵗᵒ ᵍⁱᵛᵉ ᵐᵉ ˡᵒᵛᵉ"

Neo x goth! hacker!Reader

***read the revised edition here!

Premise: In our second chapter, reader finally meets who's been stealing all her clients, and to her dismay, he's actually really cute. That's going to make disliking him and working with him harder if she can't get her thoughts out of the gutter. Neo, on the other hand is battling his fetishes, playing peeping tom and having a little me time in the shower. Will you two be able to meet each other successfully and start an alliance, or was it doomed from the start?

Tags/CW: loser!neo, perv!neo, don't get me wrong he can still be suave, its just that his thoughts are utterly filthy for what he wants to do to you, obsessive!neo, prematrix/no matrix, y2k mall goth!reader, themes of loneliness, starts to get spicy, masturbation (neo), masturbating where you shouldn't(neo), looking into unknowing girls windows (also neo), age difference(23/35), mutual pining and hiding of said pining, mentions of aggressive oral, hair pulling, somewhat darkfic, dark topics and love likely to be discussed, dom!neo, switch!reader, brat!reader, and any other tags in the first chapter.

A/N: Neo is going to seem so much more confident and scary to reader upon first meeting, but I promise you underneath all that he's a total nerd who still hasn't had a girlfriend, though that does fuel his more aggressive and kinky nature, so still expect him to dom! In the bedroom.

First chapter here. Read part three here. AO3 link here

Words: 5.6k

Neo hates to admit it, but he left your picture up on his computer for the rest of the night. At first, your ghostly pixelated image made him feel strange, to say the least. Accompanying the fact that you were essentially proposing to watch over him, to make sure he didn't leave any back doors open when hacking, Neo began to sleep, images of you as his guardian Angel finding their way into his fleeting thoughts of restless sleep.  When he awoke late the next day, he was sweating once again. The hot Chicago summer was droning on, the early season when it's just deciding to heat up was long gone and replaced with humid, sweltering days. Neo could hardly stand it, and opted for a shower, his body sticking to his clothes as he took them off and tossed them on the bathroom floor.  As the cool water hit his body, he began to think of you again. He imaged your pretty little face, you had to be younger than him, that much was obvious. Your dark hair, pitch black as your clothes and makeup. Under the stream of the shower head, Neo found himself imagining you in ways he would feel guilty about afterwards. 

He imagines you, in the shower with him, your hands gently cascading down his body, coming to rest right before his hard cock. You look up at him, your makeup starting to fall from the water, and your lipstick leaving rings on his cock when you start sucking him off. Neo practically groans out from the thought, his hand keeping pace on his own cock while he imagines that it's your mouth inside, soft, wet, and warm. He can only imagine what it would be like for you to encompass his cock with your perfect, cute mouth. Fuck. He can barely keep himself from cumming right now, the idea is so sexy. 

What really gets him over the edge is imagining taking your hair in his hands and gripping it enough that you cry out, and when you do he's pumping his cock into your mouth harder than before. His muscles tense in the shower, even just the thought of being so aggressive with you igniting every muscle in his body. He continues to think of you choking in his cock, maybe even pulling you off for air, and you begging for more while your goth makeup is dripping down your cheeks. Oh God…He's going to cum.

Neo finishes in his shower, his husky groans escaping finally, and his back finding the cool tile of the shower wall for support.

"Fuck…" He whispers out to the lonely shower, a bit of clarity coming to him as he realizes with embarrassment just how lonely he has been. That along with this trance you've put him in leave him feeling totally guilty. He's just some 30 year old loser who has a kink of chicks in black makeup, he really should be able to control himself. Meeting you shouldn't have any ulterior motives of lust, but he can't hardly stop himself. 

He gets out of the shower and tries to wipe off shame with a fluffy white towel, frustrated that his body doesn't feel any less hot than before but it's not the summer heat that's getting to him anymore. No, it's you. And he has to be able to contain himself tonight when he meets you at the…what was it again? Some goth club from what he researched last night, no surprise there. 

God, Neo's afraid he won't be able to help himself from popping a boner when he finally sees you in person. If your profile picture has this much of a hold on him, then he's worried what will happen when he really gets to meet you. Maybe he'll get lucky, and it'll turn out you're actually a total catfish, and some other lonely loser like him. At least then he can laugh in your face and leave. Go back to his typical solitary existence. 

A part of him aches at the thought all the while. If it's not what you actually look like, the fact that he just jerked off to you is all the more shameful. And, as much as he doesn't wish to admit, he would be highly disappointed. 

Neo finishes up redressing, opening the window to his apartment to let some air in. He looks back out and sees the same little apartment he saw the last intriguing girl in. She's in there now, and from the looks of it, he thinks she's…trying on different clothes? He can barely see what she's wearing from here, but he can definitely tell when her body is bare of anything, becoming all one color besides a splash of dark hair. Just the idea of making out this unknowing neighbor's curves and ass has Neo hard again. He really is a pervert, huh? 

He can hardly tear his eyes away, and the only reason he isn't throwing his left hand into his pants again is he knows that he likely won't be able to finish after doing it again so soon. He's almost jealous that he didn't get to sit here, staring out his window at the unsuspecting woman, freely looking at her in such a vulnerable state, pleasuring himself. He has a secret hope that maybe some other time, he'll be able to. 

For now, he turns from the window and begins to psyche himself up for meeting you tonight.

✧✧✧

It's late, but it's the time you asked to see Neo. Everything works better under nights mask. You can imagine more. A fairytale can become real under the night sky if told to the right person. You hope you can actually get to work with this Neo guy. You know that your work has been so little lately. so this would really help you out. But you also know that you've dreamed of Neo all this morning, the image of his striking brown eyes drifting through your mind. The worst part was that some of those dreams were less than innocent in nature. The most vivid is seeing his eyes look up at you from between your thighs…

No, you don't need to think of that right now. He's late and could be escorted to your booth any minute. You currently sit in the red velvet lined booth, large dark curtains enclosing it, making it a safe zone for a meeting. You spent a chunk of the afternoon, worrying about what you would wear, dressing and undressing for well over an hour. You finally decided on a sleeveless dress, its top corseted, embellished with fancy black and purple lace. You chose a short black mini skirt to go along with it, and of course one of your favorite pairs of platform chunky heels. You fit in well with the rest of the club goers of Club Hel. You wonder how Neo will feel, seeing you are so much like his dirty little hidden porn folder. That shouldn't matter, this should be a business deal, but it does matter. Somehow, you know in your heart, and your occasionally aching pussy, that you want Neo to want you. It would be so satisfying to know that this nerdy hacker is thirsting after you. Plus it would be less embarrassing that you want him…

Just as you think he's not coming, black manicured nails playing with some drink named after 'bloody' this or that, the heavy curtain is pulled back. The familiar face of one of the usual workers dips in, nodding in another party member. 

It's him.

You're breath catches, and you're surprised. He has on a long, black trench coat. Black clothes underneath that you can't see very well. His hair looks darker, actually, it's gelled back you notice. He isn't someone who looks as goth as the rest of the patrons here, but he doesn't stand out either. You're really taken back by how sexy he is, not like the computer dork you thought he would turn out to be.

From the look on his face, he's surprised to see you too. You can see his dark eyes looking over your body, he even pauses on your breasts, which are accentuated by the low cut and tight corset. You can feel heat rising to you cheeks even though you curse yourself internally for it. You open your glossy. black lipsticked mouth to speak, but he beats you to it. 

"NightShade, I presume?" His voice is more masculine than you thought it would be. You're stunned for a second by him, , and realize how childish it makes you seem that you're just staring at him. You also realize you never told him your real name, so you begin to blabber it out, before he stops you. 

"We better stick to our code names. As you know, I go by Neo." He says and sits across from you at the booth. You feel stupid for blurting half of your real name out like that, and know he's right. It's dangerous to even be meeting in person like this. A tiny voice in your head is disappointed you couldn't be known by him as your true self. Not just an alter ego…

"You're right, I'm sorry. NightShade it is." You say with a nervous nod. Neo is so hard to read. Besides the initial surprise when he first walked in, he now seems as expressionless as a statue. Adding all the more allure to your already dirty mind about him. 

"Well, it's good to finally meet you." Neo responds, and for some reason, you get the oddest feeling from the way his eyes look at you. It's as if he's trying to communicate something wordlessly straight to your soul. You can't tell if it's want that fuels it, or something else, but from the way he looked over your body earlier, you wonder if he liked what he saw.  "You as well. Have you thought any more about what I had proposed?" You gently lift your cocktail to your lips, and softly sip the blood red liquid, your lipstick leaving an imprint of your lips. You wonder what your kisses would look like trailing up Neo's pale neck… "Yes, I have. And as much as it pains me to say it," Neo says with a chuckle, the way he talks and his age advantage over you seems like he's in much more control here than you are. Somehow the idea of him dominating this conversation turns you on, you glance at his large hands on the table, and wonder what those hands would look like on your body, especially around your pretty little throat. You're distracted from what he's saying, he says something stronger in tone and you snap back to those endless seas of black that are his eyes right now.  "I think it would be advantageous for us to work together. It's clearly not safe for me to continue to work alone if I can't keep my own ass covered. I'd like it if you could help with that." Despite Neo's words clearly asking for your help, you didn't feel as if you were the one with any power here. Somehow, you feel like the fly who's wandered into the spider's web. The question now is how far will you dip your little legs into it, dear fly? "I…would very much like that." You say, your voice feeling small, hoping you're heard over the loud club music downstairs. "I would like to split the profits however…"  You add the last part, taking some great confidence that you only seem to find when you're talking online. Neo laughs a little and you worry he is unimpressed by you worrying about money.  "That will be no issue, I don't mind paying you for your…services…" When he says that last word, those dark eyes trail over your body once more, and you can't help but wonder the implications of what he's saying. "I think we could really start to corner this part of town for black market information…" Something about Neo's attitude puts a chill up your spine, and a heat between your thighs. You can't help yourself, the thought of going back to your apartment after this, alone once more, is too much for you to bear. You want to be acquainted with Neo, the little voice in your head knows you've tossed the thought of something more around a few times in just this conversation. There's something dangerous about Neo, you can't tell what it is about him, but it makes you want to uncover it, find out what his code is hiding, so to say.  "I have to agree. How do you want to go about this? We can work mainly from our own stations, or…?" You begin, trying to drive your thoughts to stay on topic, work out the kinks of this budding relationship between you two.  "I think that will happen for some of the time, but I'm still going to need to give you physical copies of some of the files, and I don't trust much besides meeting up to exchange those hand to hand." Neo seems to have thought over this enough, he's also very cautious. His reserved, quiet, and dark demeanor is so hard for you to understand. If he was as cool as he seems right now, shouldn't he be able to handle himself? It's interesting to you that he needs help from someone ten years younger like you. 

"That…makes sense." You nod along. "Maybe a weekly coffee date is in store…?" You say nonchalantly, not realizing you've used the word 'date'. Neo's eyes light up with something, was that a hint of desperation? It's as if you've looked past this cool exterior of a mask he has on and glimpsed into the want that he's hiding. So it's not just you who feels this pull? "A date…?" Neo's voice has lost the suaveness from before, now husky with need. You wonder briefly when the last time he has a date was based on this. Is he really, secretly the computer nerd you envisioned him to be? His cold and calculated behavior is slipping.  "Why…?" Your voice comes out slyly, you can't help yourself. "Would you like that?"  You tease him, your brattiness coming out, your dark makeup giving you a more sinister glance his way.  "N-No…" He starts, clearing his throat and glancing away. There's the dork inside of him. "I mean, we should definitely have meetings, yes. I just don't want the wrong idea…" He says the last sentence softly, almost as if he doesn't want you to hear, or perhaps mention it. But you're suddenly in a mood, the little fly who likes to fight back.  "The wrong idea about what?" You lean over the table with a grin, your breasts pressing out of your top as you do so. Of course, Neo's eyes flash there and he is obviously kicking himself for it. "Has something transpired within you that I don't know about, Neo?"

You can't believe how bold you're being, but the way he's now clearly squirming from your questions makes you feel more in control at the moment.  "Nothing, but an interest in…" Neo drags his eyes away from your chest and continues. "In working together." You laugh a little, but back off.  "Alright, well. Why don't you inform me on what you're working on now?" You smile, eager to begin working with this fascinating man. You feel more alive than you have in a long time, your suffocating bedroom being much of your world lately. This is exciting, and the pull you feel for Neo is undeniable. You wonder if he feels the same. Maybe you could come up with something mutually beneficial, besides working together. "Well, currently I have some local gang members who want info from rivals who have been using an online chatroom to communicate." Neo seems relieved to get back to work talk, the stoic, quiet side of him settling back in.  "That's not very smart of the rival gang…" You mention, but nod for him to continue.  "It's not, no. But I think they have a resident coder because the chatrooms are locked up pretty tight. I wonder if any of them are secretly government…but who knows." Neo is being very kind to share this information, he must trust you enough right now to let you in, as well as coming to a commitment to your partnership. You almost bite your lip with glee over that revelation, but stop yourself. "Interesting, I should probably work alongside you to keep you covered then. If any of them are undercovers, we don't want them noticing us in the process." Neo seems impressed by your words.  "Exactly. You're uh, pretty good at this for your age." He comments, acknowledging your age differences with caution.  "Yeah, I've been doing this for a while, and was taught by some pretty good hackers…" You shrug, as if it's no big deal. You want to be mature for him, even though 23 is plenty old, you feel quite immature half the time, hence your bratty behavior. Neo seems a bit skeptical. "Sure…well. I hope you can do a good job of watching over me while I do the rest of the hacking. I've never had a…I don't know what to call it, an assistant?" He says trying to find the right word for you.  "Hey! I am not going to be your assistant!" You reject the notion, a bit childish of you despite your previous worry of maturity.  "Alright, alright…" Neo chuckles, raising those big hands in defeat. "What should I say instead? Colleague? Partner? Guardian Angel who looks after me?"  He jokes about the last one, but something inside you kind of likes the ring of that. You laugh along with him, you two are getting comfortable, and you notice he's leaned over the table towards you as well.  "We'll work on that one…" You say, looking into his eyes, his eyes searching yours just the same. The flash of the idea of closing the foot of space between you two and trying those soft looking lips floats by in your mind. You can just imagine what he would look like when you're done, his lips smudged with your lipstick. You can't help but want to mark your territory.  The two of you continue to discuss the details, both of you surprising the other with how much tech knowledge you both possess. Somehow, you feel as if he just gets you, it's so strange. You have felt so lonely this summer, it feels as if a fire has been ignited in you, bringing you back to life, your body buzzing. You don't know if it's the liquor you've had, which hasn't been that much really, but you feel like you could get addicted to Neo's energy. He's just so interesting.  When he asks to walk you home, you don't even think twice.  ✧✧✧

The night has brought rain while the two of you were in Club Hel, and Neo's mind is racing. He's absolutely obsessed with you. He couldn't take his eyes off you all night, even though he tried to act aloof and maybe even use his maturity to seem as if he has control over the situation. But the truth is, you could have him wrapped around your finger in no time.  Neo's aware of this, but the lonely loser inside him is so desperate for this connection. He feels as if he needs you. If he loses you, scares you off, that would crush him at this point. If he thought he was in trouble just from seeing your picture, coming in and seeing your real life form has absolutely blown his mind. He has no idea how he scored talking to someone as sexy as you, but knows he can't screw up and show you how much of a nerdy perv he actually is. He's so glad the table hid how hard he was for you, and when you two stand up so he can show you home when you're all done, he keeps his trench coat closed tight.  He quickly helps you into a cab, the rain just beginning, but by the time you're both inside the hot backseat of the cab, you're drenched. God, he can't believe how gorgeous you look with your black hair soaking wet, he watches the city lights glint off your now slippery breasts. He really can't believe you wore something so promiscuous to your first meeting with him.  He wonders if you want him as much as he wants you, but he almost can't let himself believe it. He wouldn't be able to live from another let down like that. He is pretty old to still be a virgin, one of his biggest secrets, and the fact that he's barely talked to girls, let alone never really had a girlfriend doesn't help. He's always felt like such a freak, and the stuff he's into, hobbies like hacking, kinks, or otherwise, have never been something women have been interested in.  But you? Here you are, this gothic beauty who has the same passion as him. It's too good to be true. He can barely speak to you. He's so wrapped up in his own thoughts and nervous in the cab.  He wishes this were a real date, that taking you home meant he got to follow behind you. His thoughts tumble into going into your bedroom with you, pinning you to the bed, and him finally having his way with you. He's been picturing it all night. He wants you to moan out his name, tell him how much you want him, and take as much of his cock as physically possible.  God, he can't even hardly look at you right now his thoughts are so dirty.  "She probably thinks I'm such a huge freak I can't believe I haven't run her off yet." He finds himself thinking.  Neo wishes he could find a balance between this desperate horniess he feels for you, and being a normal man who has very good intentions with you. He can't help it, he's already lost to the thought of you tied up and willing. He can just picture his hands moving all over your body, tightening the rope where need be. He bets you even want the rope to be black. "We're almost here…" Your angelic voice whispers to him. He's snapped out of his daydream, and he realizes the two of you are super close to his apartment. For a moment he worries he gave the driver the wrong address, but no, there you are, stepping out and leading him to your apartment.  Neo lets you take his hand, and run through the rain towards your apartment building. It's as if an electrical current is running between where you two meet, hands touching skin to skin, a need so bad that Neo wonders if he can control himself. The urge to pull you to him and smash his lips against yours, uncaring from the rain, is strong enough he has to stop himself. When you two finally get inside the building, you're shivering, your little bit of clothing soaked and not offering much heat.  "Here…" Neo says, taking his trench coat off, the leather allowing most of the water to glide off, the inside dry and warm. 

"Oh! Thank you…" Your soft voice says, and Neo feels so good to be able to help you like this. When you turn to go up the stairs, Neo adjusts hIs cock in his pants, now that the trench coats gone, he doesn't want you to see his hardness. He hopes you don't notice.  The two of you walk up the stairs to your apartment, and Neo is almost angry with you that he can see up your skirt, spotting red lacy panties on your ample ass. Fuck. He has to keep it together, but it's so hard to keep his brain from fogging over with lustful thoughts of you. You two haven't even discussed anything romantic, he can't be acting like this, besides how much younger you are, you probably aren't interested, and, and…

Neo doesn't even notice you two are at your apartment before you're opening the door and turning to him. He feels entirely caught off guard by your big, innocent eyes looking up at him. 

"Well, would you like to come in and dry off? I have a spare umbrella you can use when you go…?" The way you're speaking and looking at him right now, he could just grab you and push you inside, taking as much of your flesh in his mouth as possible. Besides the fact, that there's no fucking way you really invited him in.

"I-Yeah…I would like that." Neo finds his voice. It would be nice, his hair is soaking wet, now dark and in his face, the gel no longer keeping it as slicked back as he would like. He doesn't like feeling so disheveled, so out of control. "Good, come in. You can sit on the couch…" You say to him, pointing out the couch and bouncing off the the bathroom to get a towel. 

Neo sits as told, and takes in your apartment. It's small, has more rooms than his however, and the decor matches your style, a bit toned down in the living room and kitchen, but has he leans he can see into your bedroom from the couch.  He leans a bit more, and realizes he can see something else too. His cock aches when he notices that he's looking into the bathroom, the door isn't shut fully and he can see your form moving about in there. It looks like you are taking care of yourself first, stripping down from the skimpy goth outfit you had on.  Neo clutches the side of the couch, his breath stuck in his chest as he sees those lacey red panties, and now gets a glimpse of the matching bra as well. He wonders if you put those on on purpose tonight, or if that's how you always dress. 

Soon, he knows he absolutely should look away as your back is now bare, your bra slipping down your shoulders, from this angle not revealing anything quite yet. Neo can't help himself, his hand is pressed to his cock over his pants, just tiny bits of well placed pressure exciting him even more. He knows he can't look, this isn't right, he isn't supposed to see this, but god, he could cum in his pants right now if he keeps staring.  You continue to undress, your bare ass now facing Neo, your panties on the floor of the bathroom, you seem to semi kick them towards a pile of clothes. Neo is totally entranced by you, rubbing on himself more and more, getting off on the fact that he shouldn't be looking, the forbidden intrigue becoming an obsession for him. He's so fucked. He jumps when you begin to turn, and scrambles when you come out of the bathroom and into your bedroom naked. He moves back to his original position on the couch like his life depends on it, his heart beating hard. He tries to adjust to seem nonchalant when you come out, this time sporting a Bauhaus band T-shirt that's way too big for you, along with a pair of black sporty shorts. He isn't sure if this is hotter than seeing you naked to be honest, your hair is still wet, and your make up has been washed off. He feels as if he should only see this version of you if you only allowed him to be that intimate with you.  You toss him a towel and point into the bedroom.  "The bathrooms in there if you need to use it." You say with a smile, coming to sit on the couch yourself now. Neo nods and quickly stands, trying to hide his hot and hard cock. This might be his chance to help himself out, though the guilt of that is already starting as he thinks it.  He goes to the bathroom, and makes sure the door is shut. He can't let you see this. His pants are down before he do anything else. His cock is freed, and the night air sticks to it. Fuck, he's so hard for you.  Neo is stroking himself off in your tiny little bathroom, trying to cover his mouth from heavy breathing. He's so scared you'll hear him or he'll take too much time and be suspicious. Honestly the nerves are making it hard to get off, then he sees something laying on the floor and groans.  He snatches your discarded red panties, not even questioning the morals of pressing them against his face and getting a smell of you. God, you smell so fucking sweet and musky, Neo could scream. He imagines fucking you like no other right now. He wants you against this bathroom counter, looking at your own reflection, watching yourself desperately need his cock. 

He thinks about tying your hands behind your back, and pressing your face into the counter as he gets forceful with your tiny body. He's so much bigger than you by comparison, height alone gives him all the advantage he needs over keeping you in place and fuckable. He would easily be able to get what he wants from you.  The smell of your pussy on these panties Is making his head spin, he keeps using his hand, harder and harder, getting to climax thinking about shooting off a load inside of you. He aims for your sink as he finishes, his disgusting actions leaving a mess there. Once again, fuck… Neo has to just lean against the wall for a moment can catch his breath. This is the second time he's jerked off to thinking of you, he's such a loser. He briefly wonders if he made a mistake, if he goes back out there and by some miracle you actually brought him up here to fuck him, did he just both metaphorically and physically blow it? No, there's no way. Neo shamefully cleans up after himself. He even makes sure to rinse his hands and the sink with soap, it wouldn't be fair to leave any evidence.  As he finishes up, and actually starts to dry himself off like he was supposed to, he sees the panties where he had set them next to the sink. He doesn't have time to think twice, he has been in here too long, so he swipes them and puts them into his pants pocket as deep as they can go. He hopes you don't notice, my god, does he hope. He composes himself, then finds the confidence to stride back out there and look at you after what he's done.  You're lounging on the couch, flipping through channels on a tiny CRTV. You stop on a late night black and white horror movie. As Neo comes back out, he thinks he sees Bella Lugosi coming for his female victim, and he can't help but chuckle. 

"I didn't know you liked the classics." Neo says, your attention turning to him. If he just focuses on teasing you, then maybe he won't have to think about what he just did.  "Of course, Dracula is the best." You say with a smirk, as if he's the dumb one for suggesting anything else. "He's just so powerful and mysterious…"  "Powerful and mysterious, huh?" Neo responds, still standing by the couch, unsure if he's invited to join you.  "Why don't you come sit and see? It's still raining down pretty hard, maybe you should stay until it lets up…?" Neo can't believe his luck, but now he is really worried he came too soon in the bathroom. He slowly sits down next to you.  "Alright, I'll stay for a bit," Neo tries to sound like this isn't his wildest dream right now.  The two of you continue to watch the movie as the rain gets worse outside. And somewhere between that and now, Neo realizes he may have just had that date with you anyways. His typically heavy heart feels like skyrocketing when at some point you move and lay your head into his shoulder.  The small movement shouldn't have him this flustered, but it does. The rain makes whatever perfume you're wearing smell so much better, it smells like vanilla, musk, and fresh cotton mixed with the earthy scent of rain. Neo takes a deep inhale and hopes you don't notice. 

There's something about how good your body heat feels that makes Neo's heart swell. The connection you two have is just so strong for him. He feels as if he's been so alone for so long that something as simple as you putting your head on his shoulder is almost too much. He wants this so bad, he can't believe how far he's gotten into his own isolation that he feels this way from something so simple.

He almost wishes he could be at home, with his computers. Not in anyways that takes you for granted, no, of course not that. Just in the sense that computers aren't warm like you, they listen to him, he builds the code and they do what he says. With you, he has no idea what you're thinking right now. In fact, he has no clue as to why you're allowing any of this. It makes him so nervous just to think about what might be going on in your head right now.

Neo will take what you give him in any capacity however, even if it drives him nuts that your into him. Eventually, the night wanes on, the storm still gently raging and the movie playing out. Somewhere amongst all of that, Neo finds his eyelids getting heavier. His body relaxes as you snuggle closer, and he can tell you are close to sleeping too. He feels like he absolutely should not fall asleep, this is so strange to him, he has never felt this sort of intimacy before. But he somehow feels so safe right now to do so, and it's not like he really has the willpower to deny you.  He lets you snuggle half into his lap, and finds himself falling into a peaceful, dreamless sleep… ✧✧✧

[abbatoirablaze]

Locked Up, Chapter 1

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings:  taboo relationships, sexual situations, mentions of crimes/murder, noncon, teasing, manipulation, forced stimulation.

“Who the hell are you, kitten?” the inmate smirked, “Reyes get himself a sexy little piece of ass to watch while he’s judgin’ us?”

You frowned.

Ransom Drysdale

He was put away for the murder of his eccentric billionaire grandfather who was both a well-known published writer, and the head of a major publishing company.  It was an irony, considering both the company and the murdered man were all about murder mysteries.

“Doctor Reyes has retired, Mr. Drysdale,” you replied, not acknowledging his more vulgar statements, “I’m your new doctor.  This is to be our introductory meeting.”

He smirked a little bit wider, his teeth making him look like a wolf hunting his prey, “tell me, doc…am I popping your cherry?  Am I that lucky man that just gets to slide in and be the first one before those other animals leave you a gaping mess?”

“Hardly,” you scoffed, not giving him the satisfaction of being your first patient, “I’ve already met with a few other men on your cell block.  You’re oddly present in everyone’s lives…I’m sure you’ve seen them coming and going today.”

“Jensen and Levinson don’t count,” he scoffed, admitting to you that he had indeed noticed the two men coming and going, “they’ve committed petty crimes at best…and Levinson and Jensen are easy to diagnose.  Levinson has authority and impulse issues.  Jensen is just pathetic.  Can’t talk to anything with a vagina because he falls in love with it.  That one has more abandonment issues than I have money.”

“You don’t have any money, Mr. Drysdale,” you reminded him sweetly, “your assets have been frozen since your arraignment…mommy dearest pays for everything, remember?  And as far as my other patients are concerned, none of them matter right now.  Right now, you are my main priority.”

 “Oh, am I?” he teased; his voice sounding more grating the longer you were with him, “do me a favor then.  Be a good girl and get on your knees…it’s been a while since a pretty little mouth like yours was wrapped around my cock…or better yet, bend over.   Show me just how much of a priority I am by letting that tight, wound-up little cunt choke my cock.  You’re no socialite, but I bet if you let me, I’d have you moaning like those other little sluts in no time.”

Behind you, the officers were chuckling.  You shot them a glare but said nothing.

“Come on now, kitten…cat got your tongue?” Ransom teased as he kicked his feet up and onto your desk, “I’m just getting started…so you really need to learn to keep up.  That or learn your place.”

He spread his legs a little bit, as though he was inviting you to get on your knees in front of him and start sucking him off right then and there.

“And what is my place, Mr. Drysdale.”

“Women,” Ransom chuckled, looking back to his guards.  He shook his head before turning back to you, “I’ve already told you, kitten.  On your knees or bent over your desk…I’m not picky…not in here.  So, what do you say you just give in and accept your real role…be a good girl for me.”

“I think that our session is over, Mr. Drysdale,” you answered after a moment.  You caught the small pout that worked its way onto his lips as you grabbed his folder and slipped to the window, now outwardly putting distance between yourselves while also showing that you were no longer paying attention to what he said.  He sucked in a bit of air while you stretched out on your cushion by the window and began writing.  You were fully aware of how your skirt had slid up just enough for him to see the edge of your garter belt and you smirked to yourself, knowing it would torture him, “officers, I’m done with this inmate…you can bring in the next one after lunch.”

“Wait!” Ransom said quickly, slamming his feet back to the ground.  He looked at you wildly, “we’re not done here.  A session is half an hour, an hour if Reyes really got me going…we’ve only been here for ten minutes. I-If that.”

“Well Mr. Drysdale, you see…I’ve already lost interest in whatever it is that you have to say,” you shrugged, still not looking at him.  You felt his eyes trailing up and down your body, but you didn’t dare look at him, “I don’t need any more time to figure you o-“

“Look at me god damn it,” he growled, snapping his arms loud enough to make the chains cause a commotion.  Your eyes flicked to his, and you could see the rage simmering beneath the surface, “you haven’t figured me out, you little bitch.  You don’t even know me.”

“I know enough,” you replied with a simple shrug.  You placed your legs back on the ground, your heels clicking his attention back to your legs.  Your hands worked to smooth your skirt out as you stood, hiding your undergarments from him, “you’re narcissistic.  Textbook matter of fact.  You’re probably the least interesting man I’ve interviewed thus far.  But don’t worry Mr. Drysdale…we can discuss that at your appointment…next week.”

“You little bitch!” he spat as the guards started in on him, “you vicious little bitch.”

“Have a good week, Mr. Drysdale…” you offered as you left the folder at the window and started back towards your desk.

“Thank you…I can take it from here, officer.”

The guard gave you a wary look before giving the other guard who held onto the prisoner’s left arm a sideways glance. 

“You sure, doc?” the second guard asked gently.  He eyed up the behemoth of a man, “Inmate Everett is-“

“Here for evaluation after six consecutive trips to solitary for aggression related issues and write-ups,” you began, cutting the guard off.  You waved your hand dismissively in the air, “yes…I’ve read up on Mr. Everett.  I’m fully aware of what he is capable of.  Thank you.”

“Then you know we can’t just leave you alone in your office with him,” the second guard reminded you, “he’s a dangerous man, ma’am…and no offense, but you’re a little bitty thing.  Even Reyes had us with him when Everett was here.”

“Mr. Everett is no threat to me…”

The silent inmate finally looked down at you.

He covered his own shock over your brazen attitude well enough, but he had to admit, you were an itty-bitty thing.  You looked all business even with the skirt and blazer hugging your every curve.  He knew that you couldn’t have been anywhere close to him, but there was something about you that made him feel like you two were on even playing field, despite his size.

Then again, anyone next to the 6’8” giant seemed to be tiny. 

“Inmate Everett is a dangerous man, doc... I don’t think you’re hearing my partner here!” the first man jumped back in, stressing the fact that Curtis wasn’t some man off the street seeking some counseling over something silly, “we’re over here, trying to make sure that you don’t end up the next addition to his body count.”

“If you bothered learning about your inmates, you’d know that Mr. Everett’s crimes are all against men, not women,” you reminded the two male guards on either side of your new patient, “before that, Mr. Everett worked for the city as an engineer…he was-”

“Look, you wanna be left alone with the psycho, that’s on you…” the man finally growled, shoving his arm off the inmate.  Curtis sneered over his shoulder and the guard took a step back, “but I don’t wanna be hearing no pissin’ and moaning when that psycho attacks you and tears you to shreds…me and Connors here won’t be rushin’ in to save you!”

You looked to the younger guard, who still had his hand on your patient’s arm, “Connors?”

“Ma’am, I really don’t think this is a good idea!”

“Don’t worry, it’s dually noted,” you sighed impatiently, “if it makes you feel better you can link up his chains.”

The guard gave a nervous nod before taking a step forward. 

Curtis turned his attention to him, and Connors stopped, “Maybe…maybe we just watch you get him in, and I give you the keys…yeah?”

You held out your hand, and Connors pulled the lone key from his pocket.  You took it, and stepped away from the door, opening it wider, “after you, Mr. Everett…”

He looked at you again, taking you in. 

You were new. 

He knew that. 

He’d been in the prison for a year and a half already and spent more time in the stuffy office than he cared to admit.  But before he went into solitary, he remembered it belonging to an older man.

You were anything but the older man. 

A little minx wrapped in business attire. 

But even then, you were subtly teasing him. 

He could see the red lace peaking out from your blouse, the top buttons undone from the summer’s unbearable heatwave.  His eyes snapped back to yours when you cleared your throat. 

You sensed his hesitation, and you opened the door a little more, “we only have a limited amount of time, Mr. Everett…please come in.”

Curtis obliged your request and stepped through the entrance. 

Long gone was the layer of dust along the windowsill.  You had dressed it up, ignoring the bars on the outside of the ledge, and had added a padded cushion.  Beside it, he could already see notes from another case.  He scoffed to himself when he noticed Drysdale’s name scribbled at the top. 

You followed him over to the chair, which was no longer a metal one.  Instead, it had been replaced with a soft, velvety looking one.  A shiver ran down his spine when he sat, his hands immediately, instinctively going out. 

You were already waiting on him and had caught his large hands in your own small ones. 

“Please stay still so that I can unlock your belt and secure you to the bolt in the floor, Mr. Everett.”

He made no acknowledgement that he’d even heard you. 

You were quick to reach around his arms, tucking yourself beneath him while you reached for the lock.  His eyes closed, if only for a moment, and your scent wrapped around him, disarming him from whatever he thought the session was going to be. 

You smelled like his favorite season, autumn.  He got another waft of sweet apples and crisp leaves before you were bending away from him, taking the lead of his chain to connect it to the floor. 

He couldn’t help but notice how your skirt hugged the curves of your ass and your childbearing hips.  He shifted slightly and bit back the groan that wanted to break free from his throat as he caught yet another glimpse of your cleavage. 

His cock twitched as he imagined a little thing like you wrapped around him. 

You were positively sinful. 

Here he was, living in his own personal hell, and you were just dangling in front of him like a tasty little treat.  It was like he’d been stranded in the desert, and you were a mirage, teasing him with something he never realized he’d missed outside of prison.

“He’s secure…you may leave.”

The first guard was off, already cursing you, but Connors was a little more reluctant. 

That was until you closed the door. 

Curtis caught himself listening for the click of your heels.  His eyes closed once more, and your perfume came wafting back to him.  Curtis looked over his shoulder, towards the window.  You had picked up the notes, and folded the file shut, before dropping it on your desk.  His eyes followed you as you walked around it and sat down.  In between the two of you was his folder, wide open.  He could make out his picture on the document stapled to the inside, “studying up on the psychotic murderers of B block?”

“Excuse me?”

“Drysdale,” he said dryly, nodding to the file, “he’s on my block too.  Murdered his grandfather…but that was for a few bucks…we’re not the same…”

“I never said that you were.”

“Who’s next on your list to meet with?” Curtis asked abruptly, changing the subject, “Rogers?  Barnes?”

“Client patient confidentiality, Mr. Everett!”

He smirked, “be careful with em…Rogers is as disgusting as they come…seems like a sweet guy…guess he and Barnes were real ladies’ men on the outside…you know…before they became serial killers…before Rogers cut off Barnes’ arm when he realized the good ole sergeant was done and ready to confess his crimes.”

Your cool facade broke at his blatant discussion of the other inmates, “Wh-what?”

He smirked, “Captain Steve Rogers…the guy’s a real prick about his title.  Both of em are.  Last time I was stuck in solitary with him he was braggin’ about how Barnes is his bitch…said that he kept him in line by chopping off his left arm before their trials…Barnes was ready to play ball with the ADA…that Barber guy.  You want a good case; you’ll find it in one of them…Drysdale’s not interesting.  I’m not interesting.”

“I never said that you were or weren’t interesting, Mr. Everett,” you said after a moment.  You flipped your notebook to a new page and began writing, “not that I’m saying that you aren’t…but it’s interesting to me that you are jumping around like this.  Jealousy over me having other patients?  We just met, Mr. Everett.”

“I’m not jealous…you want to know someone who’s jealous-“ 

“Deflection,” you smirked, stopping your writing as you looked into his seafoam eyes, “Mr. Everett did Doctor Reyes leave without telling you he was retiring?”

“I never gave a damn about that guy,” he shrugged offhandedly, “never said more than a sentence to him.”

“And yet…you seem to have no communication problems with me…”

“Am I supposed to?”

“Well…you’re having some sort of communication issues,” you pointed out, “six times in solitary since you were here.  And your last stint was a month and a half for attacking a guard.”

He shrugged, “I didn’t like the way that he was looking at me…”

“And how was he looking at you, Mr. Everett?”

“Stop that bullshit stuff,” he groaned tiredly, “call me Curtis…not Mr. Everett.”  

“How was he looking at you, Curtis?”

“Like an animal,” he answered honestly, giving you a look, “sort of how you see me.”

“You like putting words in my mouth, don’t you, Curtis?”

“I’d like to put something in your mouth,” he admitted unashamed as he tried using his own methods to put a little distance between the two of you.  He realized just how much he’d been speaking, and he frowned.  There was something about you that made him all too willing to speak; something that broke his walls down instantaneously, “I-“

“Stop,” you said firmly, cutting him off.  Curtis looked at you, his brow furrowing, “when it’s the two of us, there will be no grandstanding…no using vulgar language.  This is just a place for open and honest communication.  I think that’s something you can respect, yes?”

“I was being honest,” Curtis smirked, leaning forward.  You narrowed your eyes at him, unsure of what game he was playing at.  You’d already dealt with Ransom Drysdale this afternoon, and he’d made a very similar statement.  You were about to open your mouth and Curtis leaned his elbows on your desk, “how is a sexy little minx like you a doctor, huh?  You realize that you’re that good at getting into people’s head and living there rent-free that you just said, ‘I’m going to do this from now on?’  And the way that mouth’s parted right now…what would you say if I told you about when you were doing my chains, the only thing that ran through my mind was how good you smelled…how it would be to have you not just bent over, but on your knees for me…falling apart on my-”

“Mr. Everett…”

“Curtis…sweetheart…”

“Maybe we should have our session another time, Curtis…when you realize that you need to have some manners when you talk to me.”

“I thought you said you wanted open and honest communication…”

“About you, Mr. Everett,” you answered, leaning back into your seat, “not me…or rather, what you would like to do to me.”

“Oh, honey…you on your knees…that would all be about me.  Don’t be confused, thinking that any of it would be for your benefit,” he growled seductively.  He held back his smile when he noticed how your hands had been folded in your lap, but you moved them only to cross your legs.  A smirk built up on his face when he saw your thighs clenching together.  He licked his lips, “you’re a dirty little minx, doc…aren’t you?  You thinking about riding my cock?  About becoming a drooling little ragdoll while I fucked the brain out of your pretty little head…is that why you really took a job in a men’s prison?  Want to live in our heads rent free until we all go crazy and fuck you?”

“This conversation is over, Mr. Everett.”

“Curtis, honey,” he said in a gravelly voice.  You couldn’t hold back the whimper as it escaped the back of your throat, “you know, normally, I’d tell you that you need to be a good girl and follow my requests…answer my questions then get on your knees and suck the soul out of me…but I think I like it better knowing that you’re a little brat…I’d love to just fuck that out of you…”

“G-goodbye Mr. Everett.”

You were quick to rush past him, already reaching for the door, but his hand reached out and he grabbed you, pulling you back to him with such force that you tumbled onto his lap.  Your eyes went wide, and he could feel your heart slamming against your chest.  Your heart was beating so quickly.

“Little hummingbird are you afraid of me?” he teased, “or just afraid that you like the way I speak to you?”

He bounced his knee and your hands reached down to balance yourself on his large thigh.  He could feel the heat between your legs.  Your skirt had ridden up so that he could see the full garter.  With another smirk, he reached down, snapping the material against your inner thigh.  He felt your core clenching around nothing and a moan pass from your lips. 

You scrambled, hurriedly, off his lap, falling to the floor. 

“Little hummingbird…we weren’t done!” he teased. 

Curtis chuckled to himself, watching as you scattered out of the room, and as the door closed behind him. 

“Too easy…”

Chapter 2

Tag List:  @lohnes16, @prokey16, @tenaciousperfectionunknown, @teambarnes72

[1800titz]

Teaser for chapter 6 ! (ꈍ◡ꈍ)

I was reading this part back to edit, and the whole time I was like, LOL. Isla, Isla, Isla. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

“You will count, and you will thank me, and you’ll ask for another, so,” he takes a step, approximating a good position for a swing, the handle of the strap in his gloved grip. Harry clears his throat and provides an example for her to mirror, “S’gonna go, ‘One, Sir, thank you, Sir, may I have another, Sir,” he rolls his shoulders, and bobs with his head as he drones into the following number for sequential clarification, “Two, Sir, thank you, Sir,’ yada, yada. Yes?” 

It’s simple stuff. Pretty elementary shit. His instructions are crystal, and yet, somehow, Isla still manages to find a way to entangle some form of lippy something into the mix. He shouldn’t have put it past her. 

The young woman says, after a moment of lull, “What happens at three?” 

She bites into her cheek and purses her mouth. Harry can’t see her face, but he knows she’s either smiling or making a poor attempt to stifle it. The mirth is pretty short-lived. That part sort of follows the trend of his patience. A crease works its way over the dominant’s brow bone, the predecessor for an eye roll. Isla doesn’t expect it when, after a beat of silence, the strap makes contact with her backside. Instantly, she winces, her hips canting forward. 

“Cheeky,” Harry scolds, placing his free palm onto her hip to coax her back into position, “I hope you got it out of your system.” 

“You love when I’m cheeky,” she quips under her breath, sounding a bit miffed despite the strain of her voice, no doubt from the strike. 

He smacks her again. 

“Two, Sir—“

“Ah — no,” Harry shakes his head, “Skipped a number.” 

There’s a pause and then a high whine of complaint, just as he’d expected, “But that was two—“

“How d’you count?”

“What?” 

“How do you count?” the male repeats, this time enunciating each word, slow and crisp, like she won’t comprehend it otherwise, “From one to five. Count, for me.” He twists the stem of the leather paddle in his grip, gaze cast upon it, and his tone only varnishes the words as he tacks on, patronizing, “Surely you know how to do that.” 

“Of course I know how to count — what kind of—“

He folds his arms over his chest as he steps over to the side of the chair, resting his hip against it to peer down at her, “So, do it. Count. From one to five, out loud.” 

For a moment, Harry just watches her jaw set, a minute motion that gives away everything he needs to know, and he’s aware that she’s probably ogling the tilt of his head through the lace with venom. Begrudgingly, Isla complies, “One, two, three, four, five.” 

“Lovely,” the praise, in response to her half-hearted compliance, doesn’t lack its typical notes of condescension, “Little less attitude next time, but. S’one, two, three, innit?”

Isla chews into her lip.

“Not two. Doesn’t start with two. So now, we’re starting fresh,” he pushes off of the chair and winds back around her, and the dangle of the strap from his priorly crossed arms morphs menacing, “Clean slate. Start from one.”

The reinforced leather falls, and her breath hitches, but her voice is impressively even. “One, Sir. Thank you, Sir. May I have another, Sir?” 

“Absolutely.”

She asks, and so he gives.  And the thing with Isla — Harry thinks, perhaps his most favorite quality about Isla in play, is that she has this nonsensical moxie, this unwavering resolution. It’s sort of admirable, but mostly just a headache — in a good sort of way. She’s like a sexy headache, which is a first among many firsts. Because Harry likes that he has to manually chip at her stubborn resolve — he likes that she doesn’t just fall in line. It’s not a very sensible decision, on her part, because it could go so much easier for her if she were to just follow the rules. 

But that’s no fun, according to her. Harry gets it. 

So when she says, “Two, Sir, thank you, Sir,” and it’s followed by a pause and then a quieter, “yada, yada,” he’s not entirely surprised. 

He digs his tongue against his cheek. “Excuse me?” 

Isla chimes, a bit louder, and this time with no break, “Two, Sir, thank you, Sir, yada, yada.” 

In response to his obnoxious sigh, the submissive bursts into a self-satisfied string of snickers. And then those snickers morph into a gasp of helpless pain as Harry places his arm over the small of her back, holds onto a love handle to keep her in place, and gives her three hard ones in succession. 

“Yada, yada,” he scoffs. 

“That’s how you told me to count!” Isla complains, shrill and (characteristically) incorrigible, “That’s how you counted two!”

“Your smart mouth is going to keep you here all night,” Harry advises. 

“You know what, that’s fine. Thank you, actually. It’s a very smart mouth, just like the rest of me is smart—“

She twists when another blow lands, a soft, resentful sort of “mmph” plucked from her vocal cords. She follows that up with a steely, exaggerated, “Ow.” Like he’s supposed to feel bad about it or something. 

“Ow? Good,” Harry tells her, instead, “Seems that’s gonna be your favorite word for the night. If you were smart, you’d start counting proper.” 

He waits a moment, and then smacks her with it again. 

Isla screws her eyes shut behind onyx mesh and netting, her voice riding the edge of strained, “Seven—“

Never has she heard him sound more incredulous. 

“How in the world did you get from two to seven?” 

[demontime09]

Faded - Chapter 2

Alr posting the second part 😈

____________________________________

Chris never came back. But that's normal now, I guess. I've curled myself into my bed, my reading glasses on, carefully turning pages so as not to rip it.

"Wha' youu readin?" I don't even look up as I immediately recognize the voice.

"Old yeller." I reply softly. I finally look up to see him teetering on my window sill.

"Can I uh-" He stumbles and holds himself up on the wall. "Comeee in?" He finishes.

"Aren't you already?" I reply, placing my book back on the nightstand. He stumbles over and falls on top of me. His gaze lingers on my chest before looking at me. His eyes desperately try to focus to no avail. "Mm, you're so purtty," He mumbles before yawning and beginning to snore on me. I run my fingers through his hair before turning off my lamp. This has become our nightly routine, and who am I to break it? If Chris enjoys it, I do, too.

11:35am

I wake to no Chris. No warm embrace, no pillow talk, no making coffee for each other. But again, that's how it is.

I walk downstairs to see him reaching into his pockets and desperately searching for something. He's dressed, his wife beater and jeans hugging him perfectly. Sometimes I wish i could take off his clothes in a sexy manner but its almost always to wash vomit stains out.

Instead of it smelling of sex, it smells like weed and booze. Instead of moans and happily praising eachother, it's him mumbling profanitys at me or passing out on me. Like last night. I'm glad it wasn't the latter.

He turns suddenly and notices me. He finches slightly. "Oh, hey. Thanks for letting me crash here last night, ma, " He says awkwardly. "Of course, anytime." I smile a tiny bit, which seems to affect him in some way, and he immediately looks away and rambles about losing his keys. I nod toward the bedroom and tell him they're on my floor. And by the time I'm in and out of the bathroom, Chris is nowhere to be found.

_______

I guess I should give you some background. I met Chris at a highschool party in 12th grade. Before he had any of his issues, back when he only dabbled in weed and only drank at parties. I thought he was cute, funny. The type of guy I'd see myself being with. He ended up driving me home, kissing me goodnight, and that was that. I was hooked. I knew I needed this man.

I spent the next couple months trying to get close to him. I'd invite him over, ask him out, and he would most of the time. By month 3 he was canceling dates, but would always somehow make it up to me. By month 6 he was high 24/7, making excuses, and starting to sell bud. Before I knew it, a whole year of knowing Chris had passed. And the chris i met at that party, the chris who bought me flowers at graduation, the chris who told me he'd wait for me when I wasn't ready, the Chris who used to blast rap music in my house without my input. It was always him choosing the music, but I never minded. All of those things, all of that chris, was pretty much gone. Now I only ever get affection if Chris is drunk enough.

I know this sounds like I'm just throwing a pity party for myself, but I really don't mind it. I've always been on the passive side, things don't bother me too bad. That's why me and Chris work so well. He wants to get high and drunk, that's his business. And I'll always be here for him. And even though everyone tells me to leave him, I can't bring myself to. Who will be here to take care of him? To hold his hair back when he's sick? to get him water and advil for his hangovers? This has become somewhat of a purpose for me and I'll never give it up, I don't care what my friends say.

I snap out of my daydream and start getting ready for work.

(Time skip, I am not writing abt her working who gives a flying fuck)

After hours of work all I really want is a joint. And I know I know, but I used to dabble in weed too, and I developed quite the liking to it. Ever since I saw chris and his problems, I got scared off from it. But if he gets to get faded every single day, why should I not get to have a bit of fun?

Only problem is, I don't have any weed, it's super late, and I'm itching for the sweet sweet smell of bud. I have one choice.

I call chris, and thankfully, he doesn't sound drunk. "Hey ma, what's up?" "Can you come over, please?" I hear him hesitate and sigh. "I dont-" "I wanna get high." I blurt. "Oh. Uh, um yeah, gimme 15 minutes." He hangs up.

I'm about 20 minutes I'm sitting on my bed with Chris, his wife beater has gotten a little dirty and his jeans are scuffed up.

He clears his throat and fixes his hat.

"Why don't you change chris?" "Wha- I don't have any clothes here. "Yes, you do. In that drawer, I had you bring some over a couple of weeks ago." "Oh I um, forgot." Chris always,"forgets." I think it's cute.

He changes into some pajama pants and white shirt. Classic chris.

I look closer at his eyes, they're red, he doesn't seem to be drunk at all, just high.

"Would you like some eye drops?" I ask camly. "Fuck ma, are we gonna smoke this or not!" He snaps. I immediately flinch away a bit. "Fuck, I'm sorry Char, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Chris." I smile softly. "Really, it's okay, you're right, let's do it." He looks away, "You sure you don't mind it in your room? I can blow it out the window." His voice is low and calm. "It's fine." I don't wanna inconvenience Chris, he's come all this way to smoke with me, I don't wanna ruin it.

He lights it, the smoke slowly drifting up to my ceiling. His hit is huge, and he holds it in, zeroes it, with not even a flinch. I am in awe. Chris hands it's to me. I look at it nervously. "Hey ma, don't worry." His eyes shift slowly towards me. "You've got it. You've done it before."

I take a deep breath and take a hit, hold it in, and cough it out. My chest burns And my throat is raw. God I've missed this.

As I'm coughing and covering my face from embarrassment, Chris reaches out for my hands and holds them gently in his. He focuses right into my eyes. "You did so good mama's, hey, hey look at me." I haven't seen chris like this in a very long time. Its just like the old chris, the one who kissed my lips softly before typing his number into my phone and driving away in his little rinky dink Honda. God I've missed this.

He blows more smoke up into my ceiling.

"I'm sorry, ma." He looks in my vague direction. "Hm, for what?" I saw reaching for the joint. He rubs his eyes and clenches his jaw. "I'm just not myself anymore, am I?" I sit with that statement for a while before I exhale and cough a bit more, he reaches for me almost like it's a reflex, only for him to retreat his hands back to his sides. "I like you how you are, Chris." He flicks the joint over my ashtray and puts his head back, his adams apple bobbing as he thinks. "I'm glad, char." Is all he says. It's a miracle he's even over here at this time of day. Usually, he's off with his buddies doing God knows what, so I don't push it.

After 4 more hits, I'm really feeling it. I'm closer to chris, laying on my bed. He's right here, finally. God, he's warm. My vision blurs and focuses on his features. "Ma.." he trails off when I touch his jaw. He holds my hand away, his breath quick, "I gotta.." I don't hear the rest of what he says. I hear the creaking of my bed, and feet hit the floor. "This was fun ma, I'll see you." He reaches for the door handle, hesitates. "Fuck.." He cusses under his breath. I hear his footsteps again and feel his breath on my face. He kisses me quickly, turns on his heel, and with one door slam he's gone.

Authors note

Goodbye. How can I ruin chars life any further bro 😭 this poor girl

[i-sveikata]

Hello!

I don't want to ask about the next chapter date, but I really liked when you'd talk about future chapters here, even when it was just mentioning the percentage of writing done or any small detail. So, if you don't mind and enjoy answering questions about it, what was you favorite scene to write and the most difficult one? Anything funny/interesting about it or the writing process? Have you decided where you want the next chapter to end? Was there a scene you weren't really looking forward to writing, but it needed to happen for the sake of the plot? I hope this isn't too spoiler-y, it can be as vague as you like! Hope you have a great day ✨️

hi anon! ha thats great cause i dont know it!

totally happy to talk about the chapter! lmao i got no idea about percentage done only that (as always) the chap is likely to end up longer than i expected ahhahahaahahah.

ive been writing a lot of smut scenes so most of the overall vibe of the chap has been pretty horny lol. its always a different experience writing sex scenes because youre trying to fit a lot of working parts together like what are the main emotions being conveyed? is it sexy and sensual? is it raw and messy and violently passionate? and then there's all the practical considerations like where are their hands at? who took pants off first? did you remember to remove the socks? are they actually in the kind of position that would be physically impossible in real life? lmao. i find the most important part is making a sex scene believable because youre not going to get a reaction from an audience who doesnt believe in it. and if its not believable then even that has its own function and is fulfilling some kind of narrative purpose in the moment to underlay an unaddressed tension. it feels like there are a lot of layers to the characters in this fic and honestly that comes across into the sex too!!

so in this chap they're in a very interesting new dynamic now where pete has been the one sort of chasing Vegas (and it kind of blew up in his face a little) like sure he's admitted to being angry but he hasn't quite admitted to what that did to his trust in vegas. pete offering himself to vegas was a BIG deal and vegas running off anyway was a deep cut to pete (even if vegas also gave him the ring). and that hasn't been sufficiently addressed as yet- so pete is already falling back into old habits of being a little more guarded with himself again. and vegas is such an emotional mess at the moment he's trying to deepen their intimacy as much as he can. he wants to feel close to pete but hes at least self aware enough about his chances for that which is why hes so intent in doing it through physical means (sex and bodily intimacy). i think vegas is very sensitive to any changes to petes behaviour around him so its not going to take very long for him to pick up theres something affecting the previous easy comfort they were finding in each others company before the coup. which is also why hes coming on a lot stronger in the sense of being possessive of pete and his time around people who arent a threat to him (i.e his brother and pete's family) and then being openly hostile to people who have some kind of claim to pete (like his childhood friend poom who isnt romantically interested in pete). basically vegas is feeling insecure of their relationship just as pete is feeling a little insecure about his ability to trust vegas- they're just showing the effects of this in different ways!! (well pete isnt quite showing it as yet but he will)

hmm favourite scene atm is their messy bathroom hook up tbh it is really off the wall for them. i wouldnt say theres an especially difficult scene- i dont normally view writing like that but i have been reworking a lot of that bathroom scene because its actually going to include both POVs and ive been trying to figure out the best place for that POV shift to transition (but i think i've finally decided on a point that im satisfied with). for scenes im interested in most i tend to write those first and then build on them long enough that they end up linking together with other scenes into a comprehensive storyline so there's not really scenes i'm not looking forward to writing if that makes sense? theres obvs like the research details which i end up having to search for but i usually put in placeholders so it doesnt affect the flow of the writing whilst im doing it. i guess for your question then that it would just be the scenes that i get to last? but that doesnt necessarily mean i dont like them or arent interested in them or don't want to write them. it's weirdly a lot less conscious decision making in regards to that. im mostly just filling in scenes that i havent written yet at the moment. i usually like the ideas i come up with for the sake of the plot so there's really not that much reluctance in those plot decisions tbh!! like i came up with a connection/ backstory to the minor family/ main family rings which tankhun is planning to use to his advantage (and get petes help to do so) and it ended up tying in really well with the characterisations of Mr Korn and Mr Kan so that it slotted very neatly (imo) into the fic! i dont mind being too spoilery if people don't mind being spoiled!! but i know ppl have different standards for that so it's better (and sometimes more fun!) to be a bit vague.

thanks for the questions!! it was great to think about. hope you have a great day too! :)

[archiveikemen]

Liam Evans Main Story: Chapter 4

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by downloading and playing their games.

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Even when the carriage had already set off, it still felt like a dream and it made me restless.

(Ah, I didn't realise that I’m gripping the ticket too hard.)

I glanced down at the ticket while straightening its creases on my thigh.

— I noticed that the name of the play was “Romeo and Juliet”.

(No way. This play is notoriously hard to buy tickets for! … I’m so happy.)

(Although, it’s quite a pity that I didn't obtain the ticket myself.)

It would be rude of me to not enjoy the night Liam prepared for me.

My carriage came to a stop in “Piccadilly”, a street lined with numerous theatres.

I thanked the coachman and got off the carriage, and I was greeted by the bright lights of the theatre.

(The one Liam belongs to is…)

Kate: “The Scala”... here it is.

The Scala was one of the most popular theatres on this street.

It was a relatively new theatre, but there was word going around about it having the spirit that many traditional theatres didn’t have.

I looked around eagerly and a poster on the wall caught my eye.

(Ah… it’s Liam.)

In the poster, Liam was smiling brightly with narrowed rose coloured eyes.

(Fufu, he looks good. Come to think of it, I wonder what role Liam will be playing?)

There were Romeo, Juliet, and—

Kate: Liam is playing the role of Mercutio. Wow, that's amazing…!

Mercutio was a good friend of Romeo, the main character and an important figure in the story.

At the same time I was getting excited by myself, I could smell the perfume of a group of well-dressed women standing next to me.

(...?)

Curly Hair Woman: I’m looking forward to tonight’s play. The Scala has a team of very talented actors.

Freckles Woman: I agree. I’ve been looking forward to tonight for days—

Freckles Woman: Oh, but I’ve never heard about this kid named “Liam” who’s playing the role of Mercutio.

Curly Hair Woman: Oh, this kid. He seems to be a favourite of the director, he’s been getting quite a few good roles lately.

Freckles Woman: Hmm, a favourite, huh. He does have an attractive pretty face, but that's about it.

Freckles Woman: The Scala is known for having exceptionally talented actors. I hope he won’t ruin the show with his poor acting.

Curly Hair Woman: I agree, I agree! I doubt he’ll be able to satisfy our high standards.

I happened to overhear their gossiping, and I could feel my heart beating faster.

(How can they say such things—)

Liam: Kate!

(Huh?)

I heard a familiar voice and turned around to see Liam running towards me.

Kate: Liam!

Liam: Wow, you look gorgeous dressed up.

Liam: Your hair and makeup looks fantastic. Ah, I mean, you always look good. You just look extra good tonight.

Kate: You prepared all this for me, right? I’m really happy, thank you so much.

Liam: Don’t mention it. I promised to invite you to a play with first class seats, so I’m merely fulfilling that promise.

Liam was always so kind.

Liam: Hey, Kate. The play is starting soon. Can I get a few words of encouragement…?

(I can only watch him from the audience, but…)

Kate: I’ll be watching you attentively.

Liam: Okay, be sure to do that. I’ll definitely do well thanks to your encouragement.

I noticed that the women from just now had their eyes on us while I was cheering Liam on.

(I wonder if Liam heard them gossiping.)

Judging from the way they glanced at him, they must be wondering the same thing.

Then, Liam approached them—

Liam: Thank you very much for coming to our theatre tonight.

Liam: I may be lacking in some areas, but I’ll do my best to portray Mercutio’s character well.

Liam: I hope that I can add some flair to your special night.

Both Women: …!

Liam gave them a sexy wink and their cheeks instantly turned bright red.

(I think I can see the arrows that struck their hearts… 💘)

Curly Hair Woman: Hah, I’ll decide whether you’re good after I’ve watched the play!

Freckles Woman: Y-Yes, yes. We’ll see how well you can do.

Liam grinned as he watched them hurry into the theatre.

Liam: Looks like the guests for tonight are rather harsh with their criticism. Hmm… I’ll have to work extra hard, then.

Liam: Ah, right. Kate, lend me your ear for a minute?

Kate: …?

Liam: Wait for me on the first floor after the curtains fall?

(Am I really allowed to sit in such a great seat? … The unexpected luxury is making my head spin.)

Everyone around me was well dressed, and that made me feel out of place and uneasy.

— But those feelings vanished the moment the curtains rose.

The scene was set in Verona. There were two families, the Capulets and the Montagues, and they were of equal social standing.

Romeo and Juliet, born into the rival families, instantly fell in love with each other after meeting at a ball.

(Oh… it’s Liam!)

Mercutio, played by Liam, was a good friend of Romeo’s.

He was a cheerful and lustful man, but he was always considerate towards Romeo.

Mercutio (Liam): “Aren't you in love with her? Then take Cupid’s wings and soar into the sky, Romeo.” // Original script: “You are a lover. Borrow Cupid’s wings and soar with them above a common bound.”

(The atmosphere changes every time Mercutio laughs or groans…)

The pair fell fiercely in love, hurt, and got hurt. In the end—

There was a round of applause so loud that it brought me back to reality.

(... I was so absorbed in the storyline that I forgot Liam was Liam.)

It was as if the man standing on stage was Mercutio himself, instead of Liam.

Like Mercutio was alive and breathing — right in front of my eyes.

Liam and the rest of his troupe responded to the cheers and shouts for an encore from the audience.

(... Why does my heart feel so warm?)

I chose to work as a postwoman, because I enjoy seeing the moment people's hearts are touched.

It was no lie that I practised for months to use a typewriter, just so that I could write letters on behalf of others.

However, I had a dream that I secluded in the innermost depths of my heart for a long time.

(One day, I want to write a story by myself and be the one touching people’s hearts.)

Working at the post office was fun. But, of course, life was not full of unicorns and rainbows.

Sometimes, people were nasty with their words towards me, and I felt like I couldn't do anything about them… honestly, it wasn't “sometimes”. It happened many times.

But I knew I wasn't the only one. Everyone else has had those thoughts cross their mind.

During such times, activities like reading a book or watching a play every few months as a reward for myself were my motivation to keep going.

(As long as I have a little bit of hope, there’s no need to be scared of tomorrow.)

I was sure that there were people in the theatre who felt the same way, and would live on after watching the play.

(... I want to help others to not be afraid of what tomorrow will bring.)

Liam’s acting was truly magical.

(I thought that I’d never be able to do that myself, but his performance inspired me.)

After the curtain call, I was leaving my seat with the rest of the audience, when I happened to hear some women gossiping.

Curly Hair Woman: … Liam has been on my mind for a while now.

Freckles Woman: Oh no, Liam is mine! I had my eyes on him first!

(...!)

Curly Hair Woman: He is indeed the greatest star of The Scala. He shines as bright as Betelgeuse.

Freckles Woman: I’ll watch every single one of Liam’s plays from now on! I have to tell my husband about this too.

The two women left the theatre in high spirits.

I was so happy to hear their positive remarks that I couldn't keep myself from smiling.

I was sure that they would have a wonderful day tomorrow, just by thinking of Liam.

(... Oh right, Liam told me to wait for him on the first floor.)

Liam: Thanks for waiting, Kate.

Kate: Liam! Your performance was amazing.

I looked up at Liam who stood on the stage, and clapped as hard as I could for him.

Liam smiled shyly and bowed politely in return.

Liam: Kate. Can you close your eyes?

Kate: Close my eyes…?

Liam: I won’t kiss you without your consent. Just do it… okay?

(Like this…?)

[briliantlymad]

KinnPorsche Fic Rec List Part 1/??

LETS GO IM DOING IT IM DOING IT EHEHEHEHEH

Starting off with some that i love, completed, or work in progresses or just freshly posted. some are filthy some are not. And ALL that deserve more love

Pouring Down Crimson Fire by Lilla_Torg

This is a good one guys. Rated M. Right off the bat it hit all the good spots for me when I read fics. Alternate Universe. Magic. Porsche being an absolute BAMF. And it has that distinct Dark! Kinn flavour that I really really love. Obbsessed kinn for the win. get yourself a porsche baby. “You’re mine. Say it.”  “I’m yours,”

2. mirror, mirror by @wiccawrites

Rated E. YOU KNOW I LOVE THE SEXY TIMES. This one is so well written. the scene setting, the lead up to the climax (wink wink) was awesome. It builds up well. definitely one of the best explicit fics written for Kinnporsche being kinky bastards. Mirror sex written well. Orgasm denial my love

 "what if I didn’t feel like telling you what I want?”

“Then I won't know what to do."

3. The power in the taking by @iffervescent

Ah this fic was one of the first few posted for the fandom. and if you haven't read it you've gotta go read it now. It's got the characterisations down to the T. Absolutely love Kinn Porsche who dont talk to each other. also love how shameless kinn is in this like yeah i get that. Rated E and has one of the best written sex scenes ngl

“Pliant…and obedient.” Kinn says. 

“Fuck you.”

4. Alone Together by bewarethetraclepuppies

NOW LISTEN TO ME. I usually don't deviate much from the usual Kinn x Porsche pairing. but this one. ITS SO GOOD. Its Kinn x Porsche x Big. From Big's POV, there is ANGST and there is hurt and there most definitely is | comfort | This bad boy is 20016 words and i will let you know i was hanging onto every word. It just finished updating like. yesterday. SO GO READ IT. getting together in the forest is so onbrand for them.

Porsche rolls his eyes at him and stands up. “I’d slap you upside the head but you’re already hurt. I’m gonna set this snare, okay? There’s this fucking mouse that’s been bothering you at night and I’m gonna fuck it up.”

“I can see you,” Big whispers.

Kinn smiles. “I see you, too.”

5. Silvered Perceptions by @nuwildcat

Now this one. I've been waiting for it since @nuwildcat posted a little snippet for it. AND WOW. I'm a slut for A/B/O universe but i go crazier when its for KinnPorsche. BAMF competent porsche does things to me. Rated E, 3 chapters so far and i've gone crazy over all of them. The characterisation is amazing. the whole thing is well written. and mama theerapanyakul has a lot more influence on this fic's Kinn and that's just delicious.

“Till next time, Porsche.” And with that he’s gone, leaving Porsche behind with slightly shaky knees.

6. Starry eyes sparking up my darkest night by cherry_apples22

Ok so. Alternate universes are usually tricky to read, cus sometimes they don't hit right. but this one does. Its Alternate Universe- Fantasy. Dark Kinn and Dark Porsche. with just the right deliciousness. it is also written really well and makes it so easy to just. visualise the scenes and really get into the overall tone of this oneshot. a lovely little fuck you to korn in there too.

“Don’t let that pretty little head get any delicious ideas…” “…Ideas about how many men and women would kill to have you look at them with those eyes and have that beautiful mouth all over their skin.” 

7. Squeeze a little, tease a little more by @mirrorofprinces

Jae never misses. this oneshot is absolutely delicious, brat porsche is so dear to me. Kinn and Porsche are horny bastards and jae gets it right i love that for me. Written really well, the scene is absolutely fap worthy. And that's saying smth.

"Porsche knows he’s tucked up well under the desk, theoretically completely hidden, but..."

8. darling, you ain't seen nothin' yet by Kai Fennimore

Chaotic competent Porsche lovers riseeeeee. BAMF porsche is a delight to read. Rated G. and it's got one more chapter to go. It's slightly unserious but i love it for that. Porsche collects all the nongs.

"Something feels wrong. Porsche felt it the second the meeting with the Italians ended, the sudden shift in the air, the heavy tension."

9. Ill-fitting and tattred by Vicyvn

Post-canon Mafia head Porsche and how he absolutely rocks a dress. So sexy T _ T you won't believe it but my ears went red reading this fic. Kinn Porsche and how i love that the author shares my love for breeding kink because HELL YEA. "Words on the note are written as ‘Kinn’s spouse’, but Porsche understands they’re read as 'Kinn’s whore'."

10. How do you like it, daddy by @baby-droll

This is a series. And its absolutely amazing. The whole premise is delicous and each of the four fics is amazing. KinnPorsche A/B/O verse. it's toxic and that just makes it all the more flavoursome. Dark Kinn who's out here doing the most to Porsche. Just a list of explicit tags that are my favourite. Porsche gets himself a mate.

"It's one of the better cages he's danced in"

And thats 10. I have more. a lot more. But i only re-read these today.

The rest of my free time was spent reading Orientalism by Edward Said. and studying for my IR and HR classes tomorrow. T _ T

[specialinterestshows]

Find out the conclusion of Finn and Damian’s talk in this latest chapter of my Rhea Ripley x lady!reader fic. (Also how did this get to fifty chapters???)

Warnings for this section: Cannabis (weed), dirty talk

-

Absolute Smokeshow (Part 50 of ?): The Other Side

“I’m sure they’ll be back any minute,” you reassure JD with a smile as he checks his phone again for what must be the tenth time since you noticed him doing it. Knowing the advice you gave Damian might change whatever it was JD had with Finn made you feel more than a little bit guilty.

"You're probably right," JD sighed, eyes fixed on the parking lot, expression unchanging - anxious and a bit sad.

Looking back at Dominik and Rhea for help, you notice her whispering things in his ear, making him blush. Turning back to JD, you do your best to try and take his mind off Finn.

"So, are you a wrestler too?" you ask, unable to see any muscle due to the somewhat loose nature of clothes that covered both his arms and his legs.

"Have been for years," JD replied, finally actually looking over at you, "Are you?"

You laugh, "No, not even a little bit. Just had the good fortune to meet and end up with a wrestler." A smile makes its way onto your face, but JD's expression is still uneasy despite maintaining eye contact.

"Wish I had more bud to offer you," is all you can think to say, smile fading a bit, "Looks like you could use it."

"Ah, that stuff makes me paranoid anyway," he responds, waving a hand.

"Have you ever tried CBD?" you ask, not giving up on keeping him - and, being entirely honest, yourself - distracted.

"What's that?" JD asks warily.

"It's the part of weed that makes you calm and relieves pain," you explain, "Some places sell CBD by itself; so if you wanted to try smoking without the paranoia, you could also smoke or eat some CBD when you smoke weed in order to stay calm. Or you could try the CBD by itself, especially as a balm for any pains you might have to recover from after a match!"

"I had no idea," JD says, actually sounding interested for the first time during your conversation, "I'll have to look around for some and give it a try!"

"What are we trying?" Rhea's sultry voice asks, surprisingly close to your ear as she moves to rest her chin on your shoulder - startling you a little, but mostly making your face warm.

"C-B-D?" JD says hesitantly, looking at you, "Did I get that right?"

You nod carefully so as not to run into Rhea, making JD grin.

"Oh," Rhea says, sounding somewhat disappointed.

"Nothing nearly as sexy as you might hope, babe," you say apologetically, gently leaning your head against hers.

"I dunno," JD says, "No paranoia and less pain after matches? Sounds pretty sexy to me."

Rhea snorts at the comment as you laugh.

"Feels like I'm always late for the punchline," Damian's voice made everyone look up. His hair was slightly disheveled, he was calmer than you had seen him all day, and there was something else different about him that you couldn't quite place.

"What are you doing wearing that shirt," JD asked, looking down at the purple X on the black shirt stretched tightly across Damian's chest, voice trembling with growing rage, "And where is the man it belongs to?"

"Lo siento," Damian apologized, "But this was given to me freely" - he tugged a bit on the collar of the shirt, drawing attention to what could only be a hickey on his neck - "And Finn is fine, don't worry."

The smile Damian couldn't seem to suppress only seemed to make JD more impatient.

"Where. Is. He." JD demanded to know, getting closer.

"Still back in the rental car, I think," Damian replied, making JD's expression slowly dial back to bitter resentment - but it was Damian's next comment that made JD look completely heartbroken, "I tired him out pretty quickly and he might need a minute to recover."

Not saying a word, JD pulled a few bills out of his pocket, set them under his plate on the table, and walked off dejectedly. The guilt pierced you like a dagger as you watched him shuffle away in the direction of the parking lot.

"No fucking way," Rhea says after JD is out of earshot, "You and Finn finally got together?!"

"Thanks to your girlfriend," Damian replies, grinning harder. The happiness he exuded made you feel a bit less guilty.

"I'm glad things worked out!" you say, trying to put your feelings aside to let Damian enjoy his moment.

"So what you guys did in the car," Dominik addresses Damian, "... Details?"

"Dirty boy," Rhea scolds Dom, "You too, Priest. Finn better have the windows down; I am not driving for hours in a car that smells like sex."

"You didn't seem to have a problem with it after you and Dom had that quickie and thought Finn and I wouldn't notice," Damian countered.

Rhea smiled at the memory and kissed Dominik’s cheek before checking the time and sighing.

“We should start heading to the next location,” she said, sounding less than excited.

“Thanks for everything, babe,” you tell Rhea, holding up your gift bag and winking, “I’ll send you a picture of me with this on once I get home.”

Rhea pulls you into a hug and whispers “good slut” before pressing her lips against yours. A wave of lust washes over you as she quickly grabs your ass and bites your lip before pulling away and letting you say goodbye to the other two. Dominik seems surprised when you pull him in for a hug as well, the heat radiating from his face as you pull away. Hugging Damian requires you to jump up a bit, making him laugh and spin you around before saying, “Thanks again, chica. I’m sure Finn would say the same if he wasn’t so proud” - he looks back at the parking lot briefly - “and also probably asleep.”

[end part fifty of ?]

Part 51: https://www.tumblr.com/specialinterestshows/730125705350873088/absolute-smokeshow-part-51-of-a-prince-and

-

Tag List (thank you!)

@cherryberryshine , @littlemiss-fanficlover , @elisewithak , @babybatlover , @girlofpink , @kagome2909 , @domlynch

[raynelovesyoongi]

Love me again

Party rock is… || Chapter Two

Paring:Xu Minghao x Fem!Reader

Warnings:cussing, drinking, mentions of weed, weirdo creep, flirting (yns friends flirt with her as a joke, it’s 100% platonic!), mean jokes (yn and her friends joke around but it’s all for funzies),mentions of menstrual cycle, that’s all I think.

Wordcount:1,856

Prev masterlist next

It was time for the party. Mingyu had picked the three of you up, and it was safe to say you guys were excited. Yeji was quite literally bouncing around in the backseat while Miyeon was already singing her heart out to the music you had put on. Mingyu and you got lost in your own conversation, talking about whatever came to mind. Mingyu stopped by Vernon’s dorm to pick him up too, and when you saw Vernon, your mouth quite literally dropped. Why the hell was this man wearing a goddamn suit? To a fucking frat party? "Aye change this trashy ass song, yo!" Vernon screamed as he slid into the backseat.

"YOURE LITERALLY LAST TO TALK ABOUT MUSIC, VERNON. YOUR FAVORITE SONG IS THE COVER OF ‘loyal’ ZICO SANG!" You argued back.

"Y/N, sit down. I'm literally going to crash if your ugly ass tries jumping in the back again," Mingyu said while pushing you back down in the passenger seat. You guys finally arrived at the party after a few minutes. The smell of alcohol and weed filled the air. You guys knocked on the door and were welcomed by the sight of Jake already drinking.

"Yoooo! What’s up, guys? Go make yourself at home. let’s get blacked out wasted, dude!" Jake shouted with a smile on his face while you guys made your way in, giggling as you guys did so. There were already a few people there, and you did what Jake told you to do; you made yourself at home and grabbed some drinks in the kitchen.

"Hey there, sexy." Oh god, you just got there, and you were already being hit on. You wanted to enjoy yourself by hanging out with friends before fucking around. You turned around expecting to see some random dude; you at least hoped he was going to be hot. When you turned around, you saw Seungkwan holding in a laugh. "HAH! I bet your huge ego just got bursted after finding out it was just me instead of some random guy hitting on you."

"Fuck you! I’m actually glad it’s just you and not some random because I was not in the mood to flirt yet." You hit his shoulder and poured him a drink as well. "Also, what was the new kid like? Are they hot? What’s their name? Do we have any classes together?"

"Oh god. Don’t get me started... He’s quiet and kind of lame, to be honest. But he’s good-looking. I’m not gonna lie, and I’m pretty sure you have like two classes with him. We have history with him, and you have math with him, I think."

"He’s lame?! How so? Do his looks make up for it at least?"

"Jesus, y/n, all these damn questions! He’s lame just because I barely spoke to him, and when I made jokes, he didn’t even budge. He’s just silent and a bit rude, but yeah, I guess his looks do make up for it." Seungkwan finished and took a sip from his drink. You were practically beaming with joy; you were always excited to meet new students and maybe even become their friend. Since Seungkwan was always the one showing them around, you always asked him for reports on the new students so you could talk to them one day.

"I hope he comes to the party! " You were interrupted by someone barging in through the back door of Jake's house. Jake didn’t live in the dorms because the dorms had too many rules, according to him and his roommate Yeonjun.

"PARTY ROCKERS IN THE HOUSE!" Someone loudly sang, making you and Seungkwan turn heads towards the door.

"ITS ‘PARTY ROCK IS’ DUMBASS!" Of course. It was none other than Soonyoung and Seokmin; behind them were Joshua, Jeonghan, Wonwoo, Junhui, and some other guy whom Wonwoo was covering. They waved, but you still couldn’t see the guy. Whatever doesn’t matter anyway. You said your hellos, then let them go do whatever they wanted to. As the party went on, you had more fun and got more drunk. You danced with friends, played cup pong, and did many other fun activities with friends, and you thought this was probably one of the best parties you’ve been to in a while since school has been a pain in the ass recently. It was fun to let loose. Until the creep who sat next to you decided to show up.

"Y/n? Is that you? I thought you said you weren’t coming. Did you lie to me?" He said it with a frown on his face as his voice cracked a bit.

"Oh! Yeah, it is me. I decided to come last minute. I did tell you I don’t think so, I never said I wasn’t coming for sure." You responded and it was a half lie because you really didn’t know whether you wanted to go or not because of the schoolwork you had to do.

"You’re so pretty. You know that, right? It just stinks that you’re such a fucking liar. I saw the way you looked back at your friends and the way you shifted away from me in class. You tried avoiding me all night today. I’m not stupid y/n, don’t piss me off."

"Don't piss you off? What the fuck are you talking about? How about you don’t piss me off? You’ve been harassing me non-stop ever since we got assigned to sit next to each other, and you’ve been nothing but a literal fucking weirdo towards me. Leave me the fuck alone, asshole!" You spat back, your finger pointing aggressively at his chest. God, you were getting irritated, and being drunk didn’t help at all; it only fueled you with more adrenaline, and you couldn’t care less about the eyes that were now starting to stare at you two.

"You're embarrassing yourself, pretty girl, don’t you think we should take this outside? Hm? What do you say?"

"Don't fucking speak to me like that! I’m not your girlfriend. So don’t call me that." You said as you were making your way outside to the front yard of Jake's house; he was following behind you. When you both made it out, he grabbed you by the arm and pulled you into him.

"Don't fuck with me, y/n. Whenever I lay my eyes on something I want, I will find a way to get it."

"I'm not an object, so stop treating me like one. get your filthy hands off me and leave me alone! I don’t even know your name, so please just get the fuck out of my way." You said as you were struggling to get out of his grasp; that only made him angrier and made his grip on you tighter. You were about to give up until you fell to the ground suddenly. You opened your eyes because you closed them when you were struggling out of the guys grasp. When you opened your eyes, you saw his body on the ground. Mingyu had punched him, and Chan helped you up while wiping the tears off your face. You didn’t even know you started crying until he did so. Chan dragged you upstairs into Yeonjun's room after Vernon made sure it was okay to do so by checking in with Yeonjun. He set you on the bed and asked you what had happened while Joshua and Vernon came in the room with water and snacks in their hands. You were in there for about 15 minutes, trying to sober up. You told them what happened, and that’s when Miyeon came into the room with Seungkwan.

"Y/n!! Are you alright? I heard what happened, babe!" Miyeon said as she replaced Joshua by sitting where he was, and when you told everyone you were okay, they all left and began to join the party again after checking in with you and making sure you were really okay.

"OH! THE NEW DUDES HERE, Y/N!" Seungkwan announced jumping up from his spot. You completely forgot about the Youngbin guy; apparently that was his name. You also got up and dragged both your friends downstairs, making Seungkwan show you where the new guy was. You guys looked around and couldn’t find him anywhere. Yeji joined in, but with no luck. Just as Yeji was about to ask Jeonghan about him because, according to Miyeon, he was talking to the new guy, you stopped Yeji and told her it was fine because you’d just see him tomorrow at school. The party was soon over, and everybody left, including you. Mingyu told you that Youngbin refused to leave and the cops were called. You sighed in relief but also thought about how you’d have to still see him at school. When you got home, you were way too tired to wash up or change, so you just slumped. You could deal with everything tomorrow.

Your alarm rang and woke you up. The headache you had was insane. You got dressed up in a lazy fit and washed up, then made your way to school with Jihoon. You told him about last night, and he laughed in your face about how stupid you are for partying on a school night, but he became serious when you told him about what happened with the creep. You told him you didn’t want to speak about it because you were embarrassed; he understood and dropped it. Class went by fast today. Youngbin moved schools and was in big trouble for what he did last night. You were so happy that you couldn’t care less about your sore body and the headache you had. When you entered work and greeted all your co-workers, they all smiled, and you guys all began talking to each other while working. Today the cafe was a bit packed for some reason, but it was okay since you were with your friends, until you heard a familiar name being called out.

"Minghao! You’re finally here. What the hell took you so damn long?" You could’ve just been hearing things; there was no way he was actually there in the same room as you. You were too afraid to look back, so you decided to keep your focus on the line you had in front of you. You kept taking orders until you heard the damn name again. "Minghao, since you came here late after promising you’d help me study, you have to go buy me a drink. My friend is working at the register! You’ll like her for sure, she’s cool!" That’s when you decided to look over and see who was there. You swear you felt your heart sink to your ass.

"Seungcheol! cover for me! Please, it’s urgent. I have to use the restroom! I…uh… got my period! I gotta go!" You rushed out.

"Wait, did she just say she got her period? Oh my god, that means I’m next! We always sync! Goddamnit.." Miyeon groaned as she worked on the orders she was getting with Mark. You panicked as you ran to the bathroom. You couldn’t believe this; there was no fucking way.

An: minghaos grand(?) entrance 😜😜 story will start get interesting next chap fs🤓☝️

[amorest-viesse]

[Your Beloved Hand] - Chloe SSR Card Story Translation

Ft. Mithra and Akira

Someday We’ll Reach The Stars - Chapter 1

[Star Gaze City]

As Chloe and I strolled down the city’s streets, the sights and sounds of the Star Dance Festival captivated us at every turn.

Chloe: This is incredible…! It’s like we’re walking through the night sky.

Akira: The whole town looks absolutely stunning.

All around us, dangling star-shaped decorations twinkled and gleamed with a soft light.

Chloe: …Y’know, seeing all this sure brings back memories.

Raising his head, Chloe looked up at the sky—its cloudy darkness devoid of even a single pinprick of light.

Chloe: Where I was born, you couldn’t really see the stars either. That’s why, I made my own and hung them all up on my ceiling.

Chloe: The handiwork was pretty shabby and they didn’t glow either, but I liked having a little galaxy all to myself.

As he spoke, Chloe gently closed his eyes.

Akira: Your own personal galaxy…

I could imagine a younger Chloe gazing at his ceiling full of stars. He said they didn’t glow, but surely, they must have shone for him.

Chloe: Looking at all my stars, I’d always wonder what the real thing would be like.

Mithra: Where I’m from, there’s no getting away from the stars.

Akira: Whoa! Mithra!

Chloe: Where did you come from…!?

Startled by the interjection, the two of us turned around to see Mithra holding a mountain of food in his arms.

Akira: T- That’s a lot to eat, isn’t it?

Mithra: If you talk to that food stand there, they’ll give you some.

Chloe: Y- you paid for all this… right?

Brown-Haired Youth: Oh! There you are, Mister! The next performance is about to begin!

Mithra: Hmm?

Brown-Haired Youth: You’re the star of the show, remember? We need you to hurry!

Chloe: What…?

Black-Haired Youth: C’mon, everyone is waiting to see you!

Mithra: Well, of course they are. There’s no one as sexy as me.

Brown-Haired Youth: Then what’re we dawdlin’ for! Hurry, hurry!

Mithra: Fine, I’ll humor this.

[Footsteps]

Akira: Wait! Mithra!

Chloe: They’re gone…

Before we knew it, the townspeople had whisked Mithra away, leaving the two of us behind in the dust.

Akira: Where do you think they’re going…?

Chloe: Didn’t they say something about Mithra being the “star of the show”? Maybe they’re putting on some kind of play?

Akira: …

Chloe: …

Akira: Well first things first, we’ve gotta catch up to them!

Chloe: Right behind ya!

Someday We’ll Reach The Stars - Chapter 2

Trailing after Mithra, the place we ended up appeared to be a little plaza.

Brown-Haired Youth: Alrighty then, now all you’ve got to do is to stand right there!

Mithra: Huh.

Black-Haired Youth: Oh that’s just perfect! Straight out of a painting even!

Chloe: Is something going on?

Brown-Haired Youth: We’re about to perform the Dance of the Stars. It’s supposed to represent our hopes of seeing the shining night sky once more.

Black-Haired Youth: Us townspeople are playing stars, so this mister right here is gonna be our centerpiece: the brightest one of them all.

Chloe: Oh, I see now…!

Akira: That sounds exciting!

Chloe: Right? Oh, it looks like it’s starting!

Readying their instruments, the band began to kick up a tune as dancers in sparkling costumes linked their hands and whirled around.

Akira: Everyone is just incredible! Their movements are so fast and lively!

Chloe: How beautiful… It reminds me of shooting stars.

While we were enraptured by the performance, Mithra began to languidly move towards us.

Akira: Huh? Mithra?

Chloe: Are you supposed to be here?

Mithra: What does it matter? This is dreadfully boring.

Brown-Haired Youth: Where are you goin’, hot stuff!? You’re the star, remember!?

Mithra: Well I don’t want to be anymore.

Brown-Haired Youth: Aw c’mon! Don’t say that!

Mithra: What a pain… If you need someone that badly, why don’t you make them your star?

Akira: What!? Me!?

Brown-Haired Youth: Oh, if that’s the case then can you gimme a show? Just hit me with everything you’ve got!

Akira: Umm…

Taken by surprise, I completely blanked out. However, Chloe came up behind me and whispered in my ear.

Chloe: I’ve got an idea, but I need you to get everyone’s attention.

Akira: L- let’s try it…!

Akira: Hey, everyone! What’s that up there!?

Brown-Haired Youth: Where…? I don’t see anything…

Chloe: <<Suispicibo Voitingok>>!

Brown-Haired Youth: Will ya look at that…!

Secretly whispering his spell, Chloe sent all the festival decorations swirling into the sky where they began to glitter and gleam.

—Just like real stars.

Brown-Haired Youth: This is incredible! Just look at the way they’re flying and shining! How did you do that!?

Black-Haired Youth: Who cares how they did it!? Let’s dance under the stars while we can!

Golden-Haired Youth: You said it!

Underneath the sparkling sky, the townsfolk began to dance once more—it was as if their prayers were truly granted.

The stars continued to twinkle above, casting their light upon the stage. With beaming faces all around us, it felt as if we were in a dream.

Akira: Thanks for having my back, Chloe. Everyone looks like they’re enjoying themselves thanks to you.

Chloe: It’s no problem! I’m just glad it worked out.

Chloe: …Seeing everyone like this is making me want to dance too.

Chloe: Wanna join me, Master Sage?

Akira: Me? Dance?

Chloe: Yeah! C’mon, I’ll be right there with you!

Already on the move, Chloe held out his hand to me.

Taking it, we spun into the crowd, dancing underneath the starlight.

Someday We’ll Reach The Stars - Chapter 3

As the Dance of the Stars drew to a close, we watched the magical lights shining above us slowly dim.

Chloe: Whew, that was fun!

Akira: Ahaha, you said it. With the way the crowd kept growing, it felt like we were one big family by the end.

Mithra: Everything got so out of hand, even I was swept into it.

Akira: Things did get pretty crazy, but it must’ve been an incredible experience for them to dance underneath the stars.

Mithra: They must be rather simpleminded to be pleased by a cheap imitation like that if you ask me.

In response to Mithra’s sardonic remark, Chloe simply smiled.

Chloe: …Even if it’s a cheap imitation, I don’t see a problem with that. All it means is that we’re dreaming of reaching the real thing someday.

Chloe: I understand what it’s like to yearn and strive for something with all your heart. That desire is what keeps you going.

Surely, Chloe was talking about the stars he used to make as a child. Despite the years that have passed, I could still see the flicker of passion in his eyes.

Chloe: It might not be the real thing, but the happiness it gives me definitely is.

Chloe: I’m sure the townspeople felt the exact same way tonight.

Then, Chloe suddenly stopped speaking as if coming to a revelation.

Chloe: B- But then again, my magic couldn’t possibly compare to actually seeing the sky…!

Mithra: Exactly. Next time, I’ll take us to my hometown and show you what a real starry sky should look like.

Mithra: That would help improve your magic, right?

Chloe: Oh, t- thank you…!

Mithra: In that case, I’ll take my leave now.

[Footsteps]

Chloe’s eyes glittered as he watched Mithra leave, filled with appreciation for his unexpected proposal.

Akira: I’m sure the townspeople had a lot of fun tonight too. At least, that’s how it seemed to me anyways.

Chloe blinked a few times in surprise, before letting out a sigh of relief.

Chloe: I'm really glad you think so.

Brown-Haired Youth: Oh, they’re over here! He—y, d’ya think you can do the thing again!?

Brown-Haired Youth: We still have a good amount of dance left in us, so whaddaya say?

Chloe: …

The two of us froze for a second as everyone looked at us with wide grins on their faces, but as our eyes met, it was clear we were on the same page.

Akira: Of course we can! Just turn your attention to the skies!

Chloe: <<Suispicibo Voitingok>>!

The crowd began to cheer as the miraculous view from before rearranged itself once again.

Amidst the glow of the stars, it was Chloe’s smile that shone the brightest.

The Truth Behind The Rainbow Glow - Card Episode

Akira: The Star Dance Festival was so much fun thanks to you.

Chloe: I’m so glad everyone enjoyed it!

Chloe: By the way, did you know the Western Wizards held our very own Star Dance Festival last night?

Akira: Huh? Here?

Chloe: Yep! We had such a great time the other day that we decided to do it again!

Chloe: To set the mood, we decorated the sky with twinkling rainbow-colored stars.

Akira: Rainbow stars… That does sound like fun!

Chloe: Right? And it was soo cute too. So much so that we made ourselves rainbow-colored and danced among the stars.

Akira: You… what? Were you twinkling too…?

Chloe: We had a whole competition to see who could glow the brightest and even started racing through the sky like comets… It was a blast!

Akira: (Ah, so that explains all the flashing rainbow lights outside my window yesterday.)

Home Screen Voice Line

“During our traveling days, Rustica and I often slept outdoors. We’d look up at the stars together and try to find the very brightest one. That’s why, the night sky is full of memories for me. …Ehehe, I’m sure this moment, stargazing with you, will become a precious memory for me too.”

[ddeongies]

i wanna add, i know how much we all love top yeji but i think part of what makes that so enticing is how pliable she is for ryujin, like in a way where she will literally do whatever ryujin tells her to, be it being rough and mean or letting ryu have a turn for once. just like, how willing and giving she inherently is, and i think thats so special and such a good dynamic for them to have because there's so many ways to play around with that (which you do, and incredibly well at that). it's just such an enjoyable dynamic to read because it never feels like either of them are pushing things the other may not want onto each other. ultimately its a relationship founded on trust no matter which way you spin it, and i think its so important, both for the characters and me as a reader, that there's this constant underlying knowledge that yeji has enough faith in ryujin to know she won't make her do anything she won't like, and that ryujin trusts yeji enough to ask her to do these things for her. if any of that makes sense.

and also, smaller point in comparison to the above, but idk there's something just undeniably queer in the way you write them which i just really love and honestly don't always feel in every ryeji fic dbjdfbb

but yeah i love ur ryejis, i love the dynamic you give them every single time, i cant wait to see what nmau chapter 12 and the choreo epilogue bring us, i really really still want to see succubus au if thats still on the table because i really think both the gender of it all and the two points mentioned above will really be at the forefront, im just really excited to see where u take ryeji next

-🖤

i am finally answering this ask thank you for being so patient and also for saying all of this 😭😭😭

i really do love writing top yeji as purely a giver (which is why i tend to write her as a service top). it doesn't mean she's purely giving and never receiving bc that's not really how a healthy and equal sexual relationships works just imo, but it's definitely her main way of showing love and care. just like giving and caretaking and stuff

"yeji has enough faith in ryujin to know she won't make her do anything she won't like, and that ryujin trusts yeji enough to ask her to do these things for her"

this makes so much sense yes!! it's all about trust, and consent, and respect, and all that other good stuff. like feeling seen and respected and listened to is so sexy and it makes everything more fun for everyone (and gives you the ability to like experiment and learn more together, which is kind of the point of pretty please for example)

it is always my goal (and it's really not hard with them tbh) to write a very queer ryeji. i don't really love "top" and "bottom" becoming these new strict gender roles and you do unfortunately see a lot of that in fanfiction. idk i just think sapphic relationships are cool and sapphic sex is cool and we all have like interesting genders and ways of loving and feeling pleasure, and i really like to play with that in my writing!

i hope you keep enjoying what i've got (and telling me about it :P) bc writing this stuff is fun especially when i get to talk to cool people about it!

[whatmyface]

LO Chapter 5 Reread

-"persephone you've really outdone yourself this time" ????

-was persephone a troublemaker at home or sm? i am actually so confused about persephones childhood, like one second shes her mamas obedient show pony girl and then the next she always disobeys her mom and breaks her rules??

-her childhood changes more often then her characterization

-the colors r sooooo pretty here -how does she know its 9 am???

-ok ik that Persephone just says "hows it so dark outside??" but if i could interpret it further like, is she saying its beautiful?

-tbh i think that in the later chapters they could've really explored Persephone's relationship with the underworld, and how she really admires and thinks its so beautiful as a whole

-idk what im thinking rn

-just feels

-"im not into this, im not happy, im so uncomftarable"

-first off, WHY IS THE DIALOUGLE SO STALE??? IT FEELS LIKE THE TRUMAN SHOW!! INSTEAD OF JUST OUTRIGHT SYAING HOW YOU FEEL MAYBE YOU COULD SHOW??

-or like u could have different characters be upfront about their emotions, but noooo everyone just says their emotions

-also why is everytime a guy does an evil thing its the womens fault?? like EROS kidnaps her and drugs her but, its Aphrodite's fault!!! shes such a jealous bitch!!!!

-theres soemthing about Aphrodite shaming Persephone for being to trusting in Olympus and im interested..

-like ok is she talking in Olympus everyone has to take care of themselves that its a dangerous city and you have to not trust people?

-but that ovb doesnt make this morally right

-and it just seems very victim blamey

-and theres something about innocence and purity culture and rape culture but i just cant get it

-just lots of feelings about Aphrodite and Persephone and how (DISGUSTINGLY) they're portrayed in LO

-its cute when i call p a cinnamon roll but just, god this reminds me of her mary sueness

-IDC IS APHRODITE HAD DANGLED PSYCHE ON A ROPE OVER EROS HEAD IT DOES NOT EXCUSE HIS DISGUSTING ACTION!!!

-god this plan is such a dumb idea

-ok i did really like the "when did u forget about kindness, love blah blah blah" it was rlly cool

-ok cant fault him for this, he did the decent thing to do ig

-tbh i dont rlly have much to say on this chapter, the art is so alluring and sexy but nothing rlly happens

-ok i really like how Persephone REALLY REALLY wants to be independent (and this side of her has been lost as she eventually become hades wife) but also, ik shes just being a dumbass teen

-"Demeter and I aren't exactly best buds" YEAH YOU COULD SAY THAT YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE

-i've been too nice to hades these first few episodes

-Whys he already giving her nicknames??? "Sweetness"

[aurora567]

Little Mouse Ch. 29

Warnings this fic will contain mature themes. Such as but not limited to teasing, kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome, very unhealthy relationships, some elements of non-con/rape, threesomes, drug use, breath play, voyeurism, branding, sex.

Summery: Rin is suspicious and has Skeptic looking into Hawks. Also some more sexy time with Dabi and Rin.

Word Count: 3122

Last Chapter Next Chapter

Rin did not expect that finding information on one single human being could be so hard. Whoever was pulling Hawk’s strings worked incredibly hard to keep the hero and the man well split apart. Hawk’s the hero was everything. But the blonde haired nameless man was almost a ghost. Sure some hero’s kept their personal life’s as separate from their hero life’s as they could. But Hawk’s almost did not seem like he was human at all. No real name could be found. No family ties, no information about his childhood. No information on where he went to hero school. Then again maybe all that would come to light if she could just learn his real name. And yet she even stooped so low as to beg the annoying string bean under Re-Destro to go hunting for her.

After all, Skeptic was a pretty good hacker it seemed. She had to strike a deal with him. Swapping what knowledge she knew of hero’s and the works for what he could find out about the winged hero that called himself Hawk’s. Though even Skeptic seemed to struggle. Weeks were passing and Rin was getting nowhere with her attempt to figure out just who really is under the alias of the winged hero Hawk.

And said hero was an annoying pain in the ass. He seemed to be trying his hardest to hang around those who were higher ups. Working his way up to trying to chat with the lieutenants. Most paid him no attention. But poor Twice was the only one who seemed to put up with the annoying blonde. Rin had started to wonder. Was Twice lonely? Did he feel a need to try and always make new friends? Or was he just too nice and gullible?

The hero could not be trusted. His persona was fake. She had seen it many times among hero’s. The hero persona was a completely different person from the human behind the mask. At first she had assumed it was a type of dissociation. A way to leave the job at the agency and not take it home. Especially the hero’s who saw more grueling sights. Those who dealt with the true scum of the underworld or those who helped after disasters. Seeing a lot of death and just how horrible the world could be wore a person's brain down slowly.

Those people would wear their hero name the same as a mask. The hero and the human behind it were not always the same person. Was Hawk’s persona a symptom of his line of work? She did not think so. Nor originally. She had remembered him being much the same as when they were younger. His fake smile had been plastered on the blondes face since the first time she saw him grace her tv. It made her believe that the persona was not a way of coping. It was simply something he seemed to do for some reason. She assumed it was to get people to like him, to trust him, to hide what was really behind the persona. A lying slithering snake felt like it had made its way into her home.

And she did not hesitate to voice said thoughts to Dabi. Even at that moment as she laid among their bedsheets naked she watched Dabi’s naked ass as he bent over to pull the pack of cigarettes out of his discarded pants pockets.

“I don’t like him. Slimmy pest. It doesn’t sit right that we just let him come and go as he pleases,” she complained as she listened to Dabi give an exasperated sigh. She was sure that the poor man was tired of listening to her bitch.

“He passed the test. He killed the former number 3 hero in order to be brought in. All we can do is hope that annoying fuck can find something online,” Dabi says as he stuck the cancer stick into his mouth and proceeded to light it up with a pretty blue flame.

She frowned as she mulled that information over. She would have to have Skeptic look into that. Fuck she hated dealing with the creepy man who she was sure hated all the league members. But he was indeed valuable. She could see why Re-Destro kept him so close.

“Are you sure he was dead?” She couldn’t help but ask. The look he gave her told her that he was sure and she was sounding stupid.

“I’ve seen enough dead bodies. I think I know when someone is dead,” he growled at her with an exaggerated puff of smoke in her direction as he sauntered over to the bed before sitting down on the edge.

“I trust you. But I don’t trust that blonde pigeon. Till I know who owns his leash I am not going to be able to relax. Just thinking he could be walking around snooping makes my skin crawl,” she snarls herself. It reminded her of how it felt when she stayed with Overhaul. It felt like there was no privacy and someone was watching her. Great, she was growing paranoid. Her sanity was surely gone now. Oh well she was embracing it now.

“You got that skinny fuck working hard looking for you. If there is anything to be found he will probably find it. Just wait,” that earned the man a snort.

“Being told to be patient by you is fucking hilarious,” she said unable to help the snort as she struggled not to laugh. Of course Dabi did not appreciate that. The hard glare she earned herself would have once scared her. But now she saw it almost like a challenge. One that she rarely backed down from any more. Even though her body was still reviving from their last round only minutes ago. She would happily go again with him.

“Don’t fucking test me,” he threatened the half smoked cigarette still sitting between two fingers. Her eyes lingered on it as the tip turned bright red as he took a drag on it. Hmm she almost wondered would it hurt the same way to be burned by a cigarette than by his fingers? Did she want to learn the answer to her own question? Yes. But maybe not tonight, her body was already sore enough as it was.

“Mmm but it’s so fun,” she purrs at him as her half lid eyes move to look up from the burning cigarette at his lips up to those beautiful bright blue eyes of his.

“Fucking slut,” Dabi growls at her. Though she just giggled at the insult.

“You fucking love it,” she teased with a playful smirk.

She watched Dabi’s lips curl up into a wide smirk. But before he could do anything a knock at the door cockblocked them. Both contemplated ignoring it and just starting to fuck. But another loud knock had them both glaring at the door.

“Put on clothes and open the damn door. I have found something,” it was Skeptic who yelled through the door at the pair.

Rin perked up with excitement that finally something had been learned. She slipped from the bed. Throwing Dabi his pants before she stole his old white shirt, pulling it down her body as she was walking up to the door and swinging it open. She watched the string bean glare down at her.

“And you couldn’t put on more clothes?” He glared at her.

“Be happy we ain’t fucking while you talk,” she returned with her own glare as she watched the man look at her as if someone had suddenly slammed a piece of lemon into his mouth.

“Disgusting,” he spits at her.

“Just get this bull shit over and done with already,” Dabi calls out from his sat position on the bed. A second cigarette sitting between his lips but not yet lit up.

“Fine. Rin, what can you tell me about the Hero Public Safety Commission?” He asked, looking back at her after glaring at Dabi.

Rin paused as she blinked and thought over the question. As a sidekick she had dealt with the commission a little bit. But not as much as some hero’s would.

“They are a branch of the government that is responsible for hero civilian relationships. They are not hero’s themselves though. They are responsible for the hero licensing exams and a few hero related events. But honestly I never payed them a lot of attention. They don’t usually pop up too often in everyday stuff,” she said after a moment of thought as she tried to think of the last time she even talked or saw someone from the commission.

“Close enough,” the string bean grumbled, “they appear to have some sort of connection with the number two hero. They appear to be his benefactors. In short I found a trail of money that leads from the commission to the hero Hawks. I also found another regular payment going to another person. This one was less hidden as to their identity. When I looked into them I found that it was simply some old woman. No record of being a hero or a civil servant.”

“Where are you going with this long ass bull shit,” Dabi barked.

“If you would shut up and listen then you would quickly learn,” Skeptic snapped back. Ah yes the man did not hide his hatred for the League members well. Rin and Dabi both fell silent as a sign to try and encourage the man to continue.

“I traced some regular payments to one woman. A Tomie Takami. It seems she lives completely off of the Commision. It was odd, a woman with no past job, no obvious connection to the commision. She does have a husband who is in jail due to his list of felonies. I feel like she is someone who should be talked to,” Skeptic said as he pulled his laptop almost out of thin air and proceeded to pull up some informational page about this woman.

Rin took in the view of the woman. Her shaggy blonde hair looked very similar to that of the annoying blonde pigeon she hated. If this woman was not related to Hawks she would have been surprised.

“You’re a genius Skeptic,” the woman smirked as she took in the information he gathered on the middle aged woman. Her praise just earned her a scoff. Whatever she would no longer have to put up with the man’s sour mood now, “can you print me off all the information about her you learned?”

“Of course. Now if you do not mind, never ask me for anything again,” the string bean announced before he shut his laptop, turned on his heel and started walking away as Rin rolled her eyes before closing the door to their bedroom.

“I’m gonna roast that fucker,” Dabi growled about to stand up and chase after Skeptic to no doubt follow through with that threat.

“Sit your ass back down. You can’t do that even if you want to. First, that annoying bastard is important. I hate his annoying ass too. But his skills are important and we still need him alive,” she said, pressing her right hand on his chest when he started to stand up and pressed Dabi back down to the edge of the bed. She watched his scowl at her about to yell at her before she moved to straddle his lap. That seemed to have his temper simmer down a little as his hands started to roam over her soft flesh and under his shirt.

“We should go talk to that Ms. Takami. See what information she may have on the commission and our annoying pigeon,” Rin said as she straddled Dabi’s lap. Her hips started to find a slow and languid pace. That earned her a soft hiss as air rushed through clenched teeth beneath her.

She was simply teasing Dabi with her body and they both knew it. But neither were complaining. Her hips found themselves grinding against him with a lazy ease. It did the job, he was already growing hard beneath her and it kept Dabi from chasing after that fucking asshole who showed them no respect.

“Yeah yeah we will look into things but not right now,” Dabi said, biting back a groan.

Ah yes Rin liked how much more easy going Dabi could be some times when he was horny. Well sometimes. It was never a guarantee that sex would keep his anger at bay but sometimes it did offer a distraction.

“Thanks,” she purred at him as she ran her finger along the marred and unmarred skin of his chest. She leaned forwards and started to trail kisses over the line beside his lips and followed the line of mixed skin. Careful that she did not do anything to irritate the staples or the injured skin. She assumed the burnt skin could not feel anything. Still that did not stop her from gently trying to show the skin some attention. Gentle glances of her fingertips along the staples, kisses along the lines of good and damaged skin.

Her hips moving against him. The material of his pants against her bare pussy was not enough for her. And knowing the only thing between her and that wonderful dick was the rough material of his old worn pants was annoying. As much as she wanted to explore the body beneath her to her heart's content, she didn’t have the patience to do so. Fingers danced down the marked chest before reaching the pants that were in her way. Fingers were swift as the button was undone, and the zipper nearly ripped open.

His hard cock sprung free with ease once the confinement of his pants was removed. The muscles in her body were still screaming from their last round they had barely finished before being interrupted. And yet she was not going to let some sore muscles stop her from having a little fun. Hot hands had grabbed her hips as she found herself being pulled closer to him.

Her arms wrapped around his neck as she nearly clung to him. Her hips shifted and his length slid along her folds. The cold feeling of the metal bar on his tip earned a hiss from her at the sudden cold sensation at the first touch. Luckily it warmed quickly with the heat from both bodies. Then the ball became a lovely feeling any time it glimpsed her swollen and still very sensitive clit.

She was already letting out soft moans and pants and Dabi wasn’t even buried deep into her body. She needed to fix that and she was going to fix it now. Her hips shifted and she let her body drop lower. The stretch burned slightly from the earlier abuse. And yet she loved it. She let out a low slow moan as her hips met his. His hard cock buried deep within her hot body. Her head nuzzled into the crock of Dabi’s neck as she panted. Her hips moved slowly as she tried to keep him buried deep in her and just gave slow rolls of her hips.

The stench of burnt flesh filled her nose as she buried her nose against the damaged skin. It was far from a pleasant smell, and yet it was all Dabi. And in a way she loved it.

The hot hands on her hips finally took control as the man grew tired of her languid pace. The hands tightened their grip before they started to lift her up and nearly lift her off of him before she was dragged down fast and hard. It drew soft screams from her lips in pleasure. She did not fight him as she let his hands control the pace of her hips and his hips would thrust up to meet her as she dropped.

She was chanting Dabi’s name as if that the man fucking her was some god. Then again to her he was one. If Dabi told her to do something she would do it without hesitation. His words were law, her life was his to do what he pleased with her. Her body was for him to use as he pleased. And so when the low growl in her ear told her to cum she was unable to stop it. In a second her toes had curled. Her head was thrown back and she screamed out as an unexpected orgasm crashed into her hard. She could feel him fill her with more of his cum. But she couldn’t focus on the fun as she was slowly blinking her eyes as she waited for her orgasm to finish crashing into her body. Her body went limp once the sensation of her orgasm started to fade.

Her face crashed into a shaking chest. She grumbled an almost inaudible, “what?”

“Well aren’t you a well trained little pet,” she listened to him taunting her. Ugh she did not have the energy to deal with him. And yet she still slowly pushed away from him so she could look up at him.

“What the hell are you talking about?” She asked, looking unimpressed with him.

“You just came on demand. Like were you even close before I told you to cum?” He asked as he chuckled at her. She opened her mouth about to bite back that of course she had been. But then again she wasn’t so sure. Sure she had been having a hell of a fun time. But had she been ready to cum? She did not think so.

Did she really just cum on command? Like some dog told to sit and she did. Fucking hell that was both hot as hell but also embarrassing as she watched the smug look on his face.

“No. I had been about ready to cum. I had simply been trying to find the right time to cum,” she said simply. But they both knew that was a load of shit. Sure she had been incredibly turned on. But she had not been ready to cum when she did. And holy fuck it has been a hell of a good orgasm. She could only hope she could do that next time.

“Ugh I’m too exhausted to deal with you right now. Let me nap,” she grumbled as she snuggled up into Dabi’s warm chest as she let out a yawn.

“Nap. Then we will see if we can find that woman Skeptic mentioned,” Dabi offered.

“Yeah sounds good,” she mumbled as she closed her eyes and let herself drift off while Dabi’s cock was still buried deep into her.

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