#its a break from all the Katsugeki posts if anything pff

[swordboiis]

I didn't go into this with a plan but ended up writing a rambly longer than expected drabble. Not writing anything for your own starter but for your Saniwa oc's starter is valid!! Hopefully someone find it enjoyable. This is Kasen asking to go for his kiwame journey ++ there's briefly bonus awkward Shizuka. 

He expected it would happen eventually but that didn't stop him from hoping it wouldn't happen anyway. It had started with the tantou, then wakizashi. Once his uchigatana began to ask he knew even Kasen who had been by his side the longest would ask to leave him.

It hurt and he was scared. He thought that being the Saniwa was safe, that it guaranteed people who would always be on his side, by his side. How was he supposed to believe them when they say they want to leave and come back? His fear was only made worse by one night when he caught Ookurikara trying to sneak out of the Citadel.

The Saniwa was obvious in his displeasure with this, pointedly ignoring anyone who made such a selfish request from him ever since. He wasn't finished being hurt.

Kasen had seen it again and again yet he still dared to call him aside! The Saniwa knew what he wanted. He ignored the purple haired man while burying his face against Shizukagata’s side who stiffened at the contact.

“Master you're being unreasonable and childish, it's about time we spoke about this.” Kasen said, his voice balancing between angry and tired.

“Shizukagata tell Kasen I'm not talking to him and that he's a shitty poet.” The Saniwa said with an irritated huff.

Shizukagata looked uneasily between the two. Kasen had retorted before he had to stress over considering to play the middleman.

“If you won't even listen to me then just dismantle me.”

The grip the Saniwa had on him tightened almost painfully. Shizukagata could see Kasen’s expression was absolutely serious.

An uncomfortable and heavy silence remained until the naginata was finally unhanded.

“You can leave.” The Saniwa mumbled, quite literally pushing Shizukagata away now. He wasted no time in leaving as told to.

When the door was shut leaving the two alone Kasen looked around the room. It was the Saniwa's bedroom, it was scarcely used for sleep and filled with junk. It was a mess and he'd scolded the other on his cleanliness many times over. Those lectures never worked.

“Are you listening?” Kasen asked, walking forward until he was standing right behind his Master who still wouldn't look at him.

“I'm not deaf or covering my ears.” The Saniwa whined in response. He was nervous and probably impatient.

“Asking to go on a journey is not a desire to leave you.” Kasen said, getting right to the point. The Saniwa jumped as though it was surprising he brought it up anyway.

“You're literally saying you want to leave. I'm not an idiot.” The Saniwa responds, maybe he thought Kasen was too close because he walked to the wall and was fidgeting in place.

“It's exactly because you're thinking something like that which makes you an idiot.” Kasen said bluntly. 

This comment made the blond look at him at least. He was pouting but his eyes were shining and giving away his hopefulness. 

“You're an absolute handful. You act like a child and don't take your position seriously. Sometimes you can be terrifying and you only try your hardest when you feel like it. I've been tired by your antics since day one but never once have I regretted serving you.” Kasen spoke, honestly and evenly. 

How strange it was that his Master's weakness was something as simple honesty. The Saniwa made some strangled noise but otherwise attempted to keep a straight face. 

It was certainly Kasen's turn to be startled as the Saniwa suddenly knocked him over, tackling him onto the floor with the full force of his body. It was easy for him to forget his Master was basically the same size as him, it wasn't a light attack.

“You're so~ embarrassing. How do you think you can get away with bullying me like that? I really should dismantle you!” The Saniwa exclaimed. 

Kasen didn't really expect a more straightforward response anyway, he knew his Master well. 

“You won't dismantle me. You'll trust me to go get stronger for you. Then I'll come back and use my newfound strength to knock any remaining stupid thoughts from your mind.” Kasen told him. 

This was the first time Kasen had really wanted something. The Saniwa was still scared, that voice in the back of the mind that reminded him that he couldn't trust anyone was still screaming. He tried to shut it up by clinging to his starter sword, relaxing just a little when the other indulged him and lightly pet his head. 

“If you don't come back I'll hunt you down.” The Saniwa threatened with a laugh. Kasen sighed, feeling a headache at the other's mood shift. 

“Yes, yes. Of course you will.” Kasen said, humoring him although he could imagine the other trying it. 

The Saniwa rolled off of him and began digging through his stuff. He hummed some tune to himself as Kasen pulled himself up off the floor and brushed non existent dirt off himself. 

Before Kasen could ask the Saniwa rushed back over, barreling into him again but this time Kasen caught him. He pressed a hat onto Kasen's head and draped a blue and white striped garb over his shoulders. 

“Write me.” The Saniwa insisted as he shoved a letter set into Kasen's gut, successfully irritating the other.

“I'll be back soon.” Kasen said, deciding to let it slide just this once. 

The Saniwa quickly grabbed hold of his arm to make sure he didn't make to leave just yet.

“Come back.” The Saniwa told him seriously. 

Kasen couldn't fight the soft smile that settled on to his features.

“I will.”