#itachi probably wasnt doing anything interesting in the pure realm anyways. probably.

[waffliesinyoface]

dumb naruto ffn concept: sasuke and sakura have an argument post epilogue about familial duties

-sakura understands that sasuke wants to travel and do ninja stuff, but... she is also a ninja? a ninja in extremely high demand?? she has missions too, sasuke. someone needs to go eliminate random plagues and punch down buildings, sasuke!

-both agree that sarada needs a stable parental influence, but sakura doesnt want to give up her career to play 24/7 housewife, and sasuke would go insane if forced to stay in one place for any length of time

-both agree that revolving baby sitters would be no good, she needs someone to watch her who is like. actually family, and not a friend doing them a favor.

-unfortunately they are also both ridiculous in their own special ways, and have insane standards for the role of "would trust with their child." they would need someone who is:

-A: not on active duty, because thats the problem both of them are having

-B: is someone they feel they can trust around children (ie: not kakashi, because he's family, but also, the worst possible role model. And not naruto because he is hokage and also, just. no.)

-C: is up to the ridiculous standards they have as a consequence of being on team 7. (ie: "obviously we want someone capable of defending her from random missing nin, what if she gets attacked coming home from the academy" "obviously")

-D: most importantly: someone who would be willing to. actually do that. sasuke's whole family is dead and sakura's parents are both old (read: in their 50s, or, positively ancient in ninja terms) and civilians.

-This goes back and forth for ages... until sasuke remembers that. He knows the edo tensei. He watched orochimaru do it with his sharingan. So. There is. One possibility.

-Sakura goes to tsunade and is like "hey :) can i have that missing nin that was brought in last week :) the one that accidentally got his brain melted by T&I :)" and tsunade is just. so tired. sure, why not. the things she does for her cute little apprentice.

-So now they have a technically still alive body that is legally braindead and who no one will miss!!

-Anyways, itachi gets pulled from the afterlife to be sarada's weird uncle and constant babysitter. This can only end well!!