#it's thinking about moon knight hours
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my-secret-shame · 2 years ago
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Steven Grant is absolutely 100% stronger than anyone.
A strange phone that he just found rings and what does he do? The mad lad answers it. The mystery is too much, he just presses answer. No panicked second thought.
I would be on the floor screaming, crying, throwing up and watch it ring.
He's the kind of guy who: if you want to get take away from a certain place, but aw man! they don't let you order online would just straight up be like. No worries. I'll call them.
And he would answer the door to get the delivery too.
Steven is the MVP.
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joyful-soul-collector · 2 years ago
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thebibliosphere · 9 months ago
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I feel like I've complained about Tim's email situation in Gotham Knights before (edit: I have), but the truth of it is just so funny.
He's signed up for so many podcasts, video game streamers, and random news alerts; it's just a constant barrage of data going straight into his constantly whirring brain. Hell, he even floats the idea of the Batfamily having their own podcast as a way to correct misinformation about them (which Jason shoots down instantly), and it's made me realize something.
Timothy Drake would be a YouTuber.
In this universe specifically, Timothy Jackson Drake, the heir to Drake Industries and the foster son of the late Bruce Wayne would be a YouTuber.
Think about it. It'd be the perfect cover. Who would ever suspect that some 16-year-old nepo baby with a YouTube channel could ever be Red Robin? You'd have to be mad. I mean, look at him.
Red Robin just dropped out of literal thin air and garotted someone four times his size, and you expect anyone to believe that's the same kid who does 24-hour Minecraft charity streams and occasionally drops 6-hour video essays (his last one was on Lex Luthor's illegal bit mining operation on the moon)?
That kid?
You think that kid is Red Robin?
Ch'yah, okay, sure. And the Joker is funny 🤡.
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rosesanddecay · 1 year ago
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Oscar Isaac Characters Eating You Out
Minors DNI
Featured Characters: Miguel O’Hara, Moon Knight System, Basil Stitt, Anselm Vogelweide, Blue Jones, Poe Dameron, Nathan Bateman, Duke Leto Atreides, Prince John, Santiago “Pope” Garcia x afab!reader (Pronouns and descriptions aren’t used for the reader)
CW: SMUT (did you look at the title?), pet names, slight size difference, fingering, face riding, mention of periods, slapping, toys, anal, dub-con, sub and dom roles, squirting, overstim/crying, untranslated Spanish, and possibly some other things (All are just brief mentions)
These are just some short, dumb little rambles/headcannons of mine, so it’s not written the best. Not proofread or heavily edited.
(Lmk if you want more in the future)
Miguel O’Hara - Across the Spiderverse
Miguel is a tired man, always overworking himself with the Spider Society. All because he’s extremely thorough, never leaving something to be completed at a later date. Because of this, it’s not often he gets the chance to destress.
So, when it comes time to pleasure, he’s just as thorough. Miguel makes sure you feel just as much pleasure as he does.
Of course, because of his lack of free time, Miguel doesn’t care where or when it happens, he’s eating you out.
You’re in his office? Bend over.
You’re on your period? I guess he’s not beating the vampire allegations.
Pick a time or a place, he’s there, willing to thoroughly please you in whatever way he can.
Miguel is on his knees with your legs over his shoulders. His claws gently pricking at the soft of your thighs as he holds you still.
If you squirm too much, he is glaring at you from overtop your heat, pinning you in place with one of his massive hands.
His tongue runs laps in your cunt, teasing your clit and slurping you up. He’s eating you like a starved man, letting out small growls every now and again.
Miguel will refuse to touch himself until you’ve climaxed multiple times. He has the stamina to keep going for hours, and this is just a warm up for him. Besides, he’d rather see either of your pretty lips wrapped around his length over his hand.
When you’re a trembling, sopping mess underneath him, he’ll finally stop. His lower face is shiny as he licks his lips and hungrily smirks at you.
“Don’t think this is over, mi amor. This is just the beginning…”
Marc Spector / Steven Grant / Jake Lockley - Moon Knight
Marc wants you to feel as much pleasure as possible, because while he denies it, a part of him is a people pleaser. He always puts his partners above himself, including during intimate moments.
Marc is experienced and he will take the time to know what you like. Marc practically memorizes your body and what gets you riled up. But if he has the choice, he has you on your knees as he eats you out from behind.
Marc has you bent over as his tongue hits that perfect spot, causing you to tremble and moan in pleasure.
He loves seeing you grasp the sheets as you bury your face in your pillow, to him it’s a sign of validation, evidence that he’s making you feel good.
His hands grab at your thighs and ass as he goes to town. If he feels you try to pull away, he’ll swat your rear until you stay still.
When his mouth starts to ache, Marc will pull up and insert his fingers instead. He’ll move them in the way that has your toes curling and has muffled screams coming from your pillow.
Of course though, he finishes the job with his mouth back on you, drinking up every ounce you give him. He’ll lick his lips clean and kiss your cunt in praise.
“You did so good for me, darling…”
Steven is the most insecure of the boys. He never had the chance to date before, so he’s always worried about making you feel good. He especially worries when he hears how Marc talks about your guys' time together. Steven wants to make you feel just as good.
But Steven isn’t as affirmative as Marc or Jake.
Steven will keep you on your back, his hands feeling his favorite parts of your body. He loves to caress you.
Steven likes to be thorough but also to go slow. He wants you to feel every little moment he makes.
His tongue hits the spots you love, but it’s methodical, careful.
Steven pleasures you as though you could fall apart if he were to be too rough. But if you grind your hips or grab his hair, he’ll go a bit faster.
He lets you have control, his goal is to make you feel good, so why wouldn’t he listen to you?
Despite being focused on you, Steven won’t hesitate to make himself feel good too. Whether it’s with his hand or just humping at the mattress in front of him.
He definitely gets pussy drunk, babbling as dines on you.
“So pretty… so pretty…”
Jake, on the other hand, prefers to be a bit risky.
As much as he loves private moments with you (like the other boys), the thrill of getting caught makes it more exciting for him.
He’ll absolutely eat you out in his car or in an empty alleyway. All because you dressed up pretty for him or gave him that perfect smile of yours.
Jake likes to be quick but efficient with you, at least in public.
Jake sinks to his knees and pushes you against the brick wall. His hand stays on your stomach, making sure you don’t scramble from his grasp.
He’d start slow, intentionally making you panic about getting caught, but as he gets quicker, you become a moaning mess above him.
Jake will smirk as he makes quick work of you, making you finish quicker than you thought possible.
“Tan perfecta/o, mi vida… tan perfecta/o para mí…”
All of them love you so much, so sometimes after a hard day, they’ll each take turns making you feel good.
Steven most likely starts, being that he’s the most gentle. He’s a good warm up and he’s good for calming down without actually stopping. But with the other guys there too, he definitely is being a bit more aggressive to keep up.
Marc and Jake will take their turns, teasing and riling you up. Just between those two alone, your position is constantly changing, there’s no chance you’re getting sore from being stuck in one place.
Each of the boys will make sure you feel good, prioritizing you above all else. They even monitor each other through the many mirrors littered throughout the apartment. They just want their darling to feel good <3
Each will take their time, only stopping when you’re an overstimulated, crying mess.
Soft kisses and cuddling definitely ensue afterwards.
“Our beautiful darling…”
Basil Stitt - Lightningface
Basil, the pathetic, desperate, possessive loner. He will do anything for your attention. He will follow your every order. You don’t even have to touch him, he’ll cum just from eating you out. He loves you that much.
Basil is aggressive as he eats you out, desperate to make you finish. Because if you finish, you’ll stay, despite his scars.
He moans and whimpers more than you do as you pull him deeper into your cunt. His hands grapple at every curve of your body, desperate to make sure you’re real, that you want him.
Why would anyone want a monster like him? Even his own girlfriend cheated on him before his accident happened.
As he tastes you, he desperately chases your climax.
He needs you to feel good. He needs you.
When your legs tense around his head and you start praising him, he starts crying and finishes as well, his seed staining the floor below him.
His head falls against your inner thigh as his tears fall fast. He grabs at you harshly, his fear causing his chest to ache.
“Imsosorry… staywithmeplease…”
Anselm Vogelweide - Big Gold Brick
Anselm is a weirdo, a big horny weirdo, let’s get that out of the way.
Anselm will touch you and do whatever he wants whenever he wants. This kinky switch of a man will eat you out in any way possible, and it’s never simple.
Per his request, he lies tied up with you over him. His arms are completely restrained as he lets you control the situation.
Your glittering heat flutters as he blows on you, smirking at every little reaction you have. He loves your noises, especially when you’re loud.
Eventually you sit on his face, and groaning happily, he licks up into you.
Your hips rock back and forth on his face, his nose hitting your throbbing clit harshly. You’re breathing heavily as Anselm eats you up, his beard scratching the back of your legs as your hips move.
Despite being such an odd man, he absolutely knows what he’s doing, like— he’s extremely talented with his tongue alone. With every squirm and noise you make, he’s watching you like a hawk.
Your high builds and comes crashing down quickly. But when you start to move off, he harshly demands you get back.
“We aren’t done yet, doll. If you don’t get back on, I’ll kill myself.”
Blue Jones - Sucker Punch
Blue doesn’t eat you out for your pleasure, no- it’s to prove a point.
He owns you, just like he owns all the people working for his club. And because he owns you, he has to make sure you know how good only he can make you.
You were in the dressing room when he approached you, his eyes hungrily scanning your body.
Whether out of fear or attraction, you do everything he asks. So when he asks you to strip bare, you do exactly that.
With his head between your thighs, it’s hard to remember that this man could kill you without a second thought. He’s just too talented with his tongue.
Running a club has its perks, including having lots of practice in making others feel good. With all this practice, this man will do anything to make you squirt. He sees it as a sign of victory, that his toy likes him the best.
Your back is arching as Blue hits your sweet spot. Your hips lightly hump his face and nose, chasing your high. His hands grip your legs, letting you ride his face more and more.
You squirt all over his face, causing him to hum in approval.
When you finish, he licks a stripe through your arousal. Blue’s eyes meet yours.
“Bunny, do you act like such a desperate whore with all the clients?”
Poe Dameron - Star Wars
Lover of the sky, Poe is known for being quite flirty. With the constant travel, Poe has had his share of hookups and romantic partners.
Which is why, of course, Poe would do anything to make you feel as much pleasure as possible.
He’s cocky, sure, but when he brags about how loud he makes you scream, you know it’s the truth.
After a long day of travel, Poe is clinging to your cunt.
As his tongue runs laps through your folds, you tightly grip at his curls.
He’s already made you finish at least twice, and he’s desperate for another.
Your cunt is trembling from overstimulation, broken moans escaping your lips as you lazily try to pull him away.
With every faint tug of his hair, he pulls your body closer towards his mouth, not letting you escape.
His tongue circles your clit like a dehydrated man, wanting you to release and give every drop of yourself to him again and again.
When Poe gets you to release over his tongue once more, he doesn’t back off, speaking as he licks every drop.
“Just one more… Can you handle one more for me, baby?”
Nathan Bateman - Ex Machina
Nathan doesn’t eat you out normally, he much prefers using his fingers if he has to.
This man prefers making himself feel good above all else, he only tolerates making you feel good. Which is why he always makes you finish quickly or sometimes not at all, moving on to make sure he can get his pleasure from this exchange.
The only time he has eaten you out was when he walked in on you having a wet dream, mumbling his name as your legs spread under the blankets.
You wake up moaning loudly, Nathan tucked between your thighs, mouth to your aching core.
As he hits your sweet spot, you instinctively grab his head. His buzzed hair provides nothing to grip to as your hips sleepily grinds his face.
Everything feels extra sensitive and good, the lack of previous priority making you extra needy.
His beard provides a scratchy and satisfying feeling as his tongue laps up your soaked folds.
He doesn’t even acknowledge that you’ve awoken, now on a mission to make you finish on his mouth.
His hands grope at your waist and ass, gripping at all the soft flesh he can.
When you finish with trembling legs, he lifts his head, his beard glistening in your juices. His hand palms over his cock as he sits on his knees and stares down at you.
“Get up. It’s my turn.”
Duke Leto Atreides - Dune
Leto is a very busy man, but he does worship you when he gets the chance.
Constantly being needed by everyone, it feels nice to relax and give himself to the one person he wants to: you.
Sure, sometimes you’re under the table servicing him, but it’s not often he gets the chance to do the same for you.
He’s on his knees, worshiping your pussy like it is a divine god. Leto is praying to you with his tongue.
Leto is so focused on you, he can’t even acknowledge his own pleasure before he knows you’ve had some release.
He has to give his baby some extra care while he has the chance <3
His hands touch every inch that he can, worshiping all of you that he can.
Leto’s nose bumps your clit as he watches you like prey, he just loves your blissed out expression.
When you two make eye contact, he makes his assault that much more pleasurable. Whether that’s adding in his fingers or reaching deep into you with his tongue. Man loves his eye contact.
When you climax, he’s smiling and peppering kisses over your inner thighs.
“I still have time, shall we go for another?”
Prince John - Robin Hood (2010)
John is a man of pleasure, and he will devour you as long as he gets some in return. Just… never mention your ex or past relationships, he gets jealous.
He loves different positions and experimenting with you, as long as you’re both having fun or a good time, then he’s more than happy.
John, the whiny man, is begging into your cunt as you two eat each other up.
Your mouth is wrapped around his length as he laps up your warmth.
With each stroke of your tongue, he moves his in tandem. Every moan you gain from him, wonderfully rumbles your pussy.
His hands grasp and pull your ass cheeks, kneading the soft flesh.
John eats you like a starved man, because despite his regal status, you are by far the best meal he’s eaten.
At least that’s what he’d be saying if it weren’t the end to your guys night of pleasure, and John didn’t need an heir.
He probably isn’t the most thrilled to be eating his and your cum out of your pussy, but it's you, so he can’t complain.
Together, you finish and clean each other of every last drop, leaving both of you exhausted.
John pats his shoulder.
“Come, rest your head.”
Santiago “Pope” Garcia - Triple Frontier
Santiago loves to tease you. No matter the situation or place, he will edge you until you’re crying.
He likes seeing you as a whimpering mess, begging for some relief.
You were just on the cusp of finishing when Santiago pulled away, watching as you begged him to let you cum.
He’d chuckle and hold your hands hostage, not letting you get the chance to finish what he started.
As you start to come down from your high, he’d go back in, licking and eating your cunt out.
As you squirm, chasing your release, he’d cage your legs in place with his arms and hands. You’re not allowed to escape him or his constant teasing.
When he finally lets you finish, you’re a trembling mess, your hole clutching at his tongue as he eats every last drop.
“You’re so cute like this… maybe I should go again?”
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Thanks for reading!
Lmk if you want me to add more of his characters or do a different set of characters (like Genshin men for ex.)
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camerica · 2 years ago
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tarotwithlucien · 3 months ago
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𝓨ou in the eyes of your future spouse | pick a pile
Hello everybody! Welcome to my first PAP on this account – it's also the first time I've done one about "future spouse", so I hope you like it and that it resonates with you! ♡
┈─★ Disclaimer: This reading is for entertainment purposes only and shouldn't be taken seriously or used as a substitute for medical and professional advice. It's also a general reading, so it may or may not resonate with you.
┈─★ How to choose: Close your eyes, take a deep breath and choose the image that catches your attention the most – trust your intuition.
₊‧ʚ・︵︵ ₊˚๑ masterist | tip jar ₊ ︵︵・₊﹆ɞ‧₊
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── .✦ PILE 1
Shufflemancy: Moonlight/Sunrise - Rope and Ladder, It's Not The Same Anymore - Red Orange County, To - The Neighbourhood, Love Songs For The Haters - FLEECE & Maintain The Madness - The Jane Austin Argument.
Without a doubt your future spouse loves you – otherwise they wouldn't even marry you lol – and they are a protective partner towards you, so in general, they see you as someone they should protect and care for. Therefore, they can act as your knight in armor when you need it, as they are always ready to protect and defend you from all those who try to hurt you.
They also view your relationship dynamics as if you are the sun and the moon – for some of you reading this pile, you are more the moon and your future spouse is the sun or vice versa. Your future spouses see you as a beautiful and attractive person – as if you were a mermaid who mesmerizes them with your enchanting beauty. And one of the physical features they love most about you in general are your eyes because, in the eyes of your future partner, they shine in a way that they have never seen before with anyone. Not only do your eyes shine, but in your future partner's vision, you light up their entire life. Before you met and were together, they saw life in a gray way due to the adversities they faced on a daily basis and, thanks to you, they felt life gain more color, they felt love and it was as if their eyes open themselves up to everything they had never experienced before in their lives.
You probably met early and one of the things they love most is being able to look at old photos you took – whether it was when you first met, when you started dating or just photos of you together in general – and admire how you used to be and they probably compare themselves to the old version of themselves in the photo and it's really funny because you could be looking at your photos together and they laughs, points to their face in the photo and says something like “wow, I was weird ” and it’s a really cute moment between you two. They feels nostalgic in these moments and really misses that time, because unfortunately it doesn't come back and all that remains are memories – and fortunately they are good.
In the eyes of your future partner, you are going through a difficult time in your life. It's not just your partner who is a nostalgic person, you are too and you probably remember the times when your life was easier and compare it to the difficult life you have now – like when you were children, for example. They also see that you are tired and stressed about the way things in your life are – for example, you may work long hours at jobs you don't like just so you can pay the bills at the end of the month, you have to put up with people you hate and it even seems like you let people step on you so that problems don't occur (you can be people-pleasers too) and your biggest victory of the day is going home and sleeping, all while repressing what you're feeling and putting on a fake smile. Your future spouse is your family and they can tell when you are feeling bad and they think that you are being too hard on yourselves and that you may not want to admit it, but you need to seek professional help. So, if this is your case, don't be afraid or ashamed to ask for help! This is destroying your mental health, pile one, please take care of yourselves!! Stop bottling up your feelings, process them, let them go, and then stand back. Do this for yourself.
Your future spouse knows you better than you know yourself – they know what to do or say to make you feel good and are careful about what not to do or say to avoid hurting you or making you feel worse. In their view, sometimes you can end up projecting your problems onto them, but they continue to love you regardless of your flaws – just be careful that this doesn't become a toxic trait that will affect your relationship. They may have met many girls/boys before meeting you, but none of these people compare to you! This whole time in their lives, they never needed anyone, they never felt the need to have someone by their side – on the contrary, they used to be the type of person who went out to a party/bar and flirted with people just to feel good/attractive. But, from the moment they met you, things changed completely and seemed to turn upside down. Just being away from you makes your future partner's heart sink. You make them feel good.
That was all, pile one! I hope you enjoyed it and that this reading resonated with you. Don't forget to take care of yourself and seek professional help if you need it, otherwise your future partner will hit you lol
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── .✦ PILE 2
Shufflemancy: Room - Ethan Tasch, Ode To a Conversation Stuck In Your Throath - Del Water Gap, Epiphany - Stained, 976-Evil - Deftones & Tulsa Jesus Freak - Lana Del Rey.
In the view of your future spouses, you are a person who doesn't like to fight in your relationship and who tends to avoid conflicts so as not to cause major problems. You may even end up staying quiet instead of taking a stand on something that bothered you and your future partners also think that you can't express yourself very well through words. It's okay not to want to fight in a relationship, because who does? But, you must understand that some conflicts are necessary and need to happen, so don't run away from them, position yourself and choose your battles well – you don't need to fight over stupid things either lol.
In the eyes of your future partner, you are a disorganized person – the type who leaves their clothes scattered all over the floor or easily forgets where their left their things because everything around them is just a mess – and they think this is just a reflection of how you are feeling inside and how your mind is going. In fact, they may think that your inability to communicate effectively in the relationship is due to problems such as depression or anxiety. Regardless of what your case may be, your future partners notice this and care about you, they accept you exactly as you are and they will not leave you in this difficult time. You may be facing mental health problems, which leave you tired and without energy to do basic tasks like tidying your room and that's okay, just don't forget to take good care of yourself and, if necessary, seek professional help as it will be very beneficial for you!
For some of you reading this pile, before you finally became a couple, you and your future partner were best friends and all this time they tried to convince themselves that you were just that, but deep down they wanted to be tying you to the bed 🤭. They really wanted you and things are no different now. You also seem to be a popular couple who attract the attention of other people wherever you go, as if you were a celebrity couple or just people who are very loved by others.
In general, your future spouse is very jealous and possessive of you, so they want to be the only ones who can touch you in this way and just imagining people other than them touching your body the way they love to touch you so much chills down their spine lol. Just like in pile one, one of the physical features they love most are your eyes and they love just looking at them. One of the activities they love to do with you is traveling – in fact, any time they can spend time with you makes them happy. Your future spouse is so cute, because in the moments when they notice you are down, they do everything they can to make you laugh or just smile. In their view, in moments when you're feeling bad, you tend to walk away just to calm down - and for some reading this pile, this could apply to your future partner.
That was all, pile two! I really hope you enjoyed this reading and that it resonated with you. Just like in pile one, don't forget to take care of yourself and seek professional help if necessary 😠
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── .✦ PILE 3
Shufflemancy: White Roses - Greyson Chance, Nervous Young Inhumans - Car Seat Headrest, I'll Follow You Into The Dark - Miya Folick, Uzumaki - Softcut & Dancing In The Moonlight - alt-J
Your future spouse is totally devoted and blind with love for you, pile three! In the eyes of your future partner, they can't live without you and they can't even imagine what their life would be like if they didn't have you by their side. It seems like from the first moment you met, just by looking at you, they felt attracted and didn't waste any time, they went to ask you out on a date lol. Just like the future spouses in pile two, your future partners are also jealous, the only difference is that they seem to be more jealous than the partners in the previous pile, because just seeing you going out, having fun with your friends without them around your side already makes them jealous.
The future spouses in this pile think that you still don't know all sides of them even though you are together. They may have red flags that you haven't noticed or ignore, so it's good to be careful. They may have addictions like alcohol or drugs, they may have bad habits, they may be overly possessive/jealous, controlling, aggressive or end up giving you the silent treatment or distancing you from them when you fight or there is a problem going on in your life as a couple – and maybe that's why you feel the need to walk on eggshells in your relationship to try to prevent your partner from acting that way towards you, which isn't cool. If for any reason you are uncomfortable, they disrespect your boundaries or you simply no longer want to be in the relationship, don't be afraid to walk away!
Because of what I mentioned above, your future spouses see you as someone who doesn't raise their voice in a fight, who doesn't point the finger in their face when they're wrong - they see you as someone who basically never showed their bad side to them. In their view, you understand them. Your future partners may also be individualistic and not have a black and white view of life – that is, they do not follow concepts such as “good” and “bad” and usually only do what is beneficial for them. Furthermore, they usually give back to others what they first received or what they think others deserve. But when it comes to you, it's different. It seems like they control themselves and use the power they have to give you what is good – they know they can affect your life, so they choose to affect it in a positive way. In my opinion they are weird, ngl lol.
Even though I think they're weird lmao, they would be willing to go through hell with you if necessary. They would be with you in times when no one else would be and they would be your refuge, ready to hug you and comfort you.
That was all, pile three! I really hope you enjoyed it and that the reading resonated with you. Be careful with emotional dependence, don't be afraid to set boundaries and, if necessary, let go of relationships that no longer serve you! Until the next PAP ♡
© tarotwithlucien - don't copy, redistribute or edit my content | DIVIDERS
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sarahghetti · 9 months ago
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blood on your lies; m.s.
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pairing: marc spector x reader centric, steven grant x reader, jake lockley x reader
summary: after an argument with marc, you go missing. he tears himself apart trying to find you.
warnings: a dive into the mind of marc spector, angst, hurt with some comfort (i.e. jake and steven), kidnapping, vague descriptions of violence.
word count: 3.0k
notes: kind of a continuation of all the echoes in my mind, but can be read as a standalone. written as part of the @moonknight-events bingo! prompt: "insecure", I promise that not all my entries will be this sad lol
MOON KNIGHT MASTERLIST | ALL MASTERLISTS
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You’re not home yet.
It’s nearly been three hours. Marc paces the apartment like a caged animal, likely wearing the hardwood underneath his feet. Steven and Jake have run their course about how stupid he is, how he shouldn’t have said what he said, how he should’ve run after you the second you stepped out the door—
But jokes on them. There can be no harsher critic of Marc than Marc himself.
He checks his phone again in case you’ve responded to his many texts and calls, but there’s nothing. As far as he knows, you haven’t even seen any of it.
His temper still lingers under their skin, and he holds it tight with both hands; anger is easy. It’s easier than admitting that the peaks in his heartrate and the sweat on his brow is from anything other than his own self-flagellation.
Anger is familiar.
This, however? The waiting for you to walk through the door, or to give them any sign of life—so much of his sanity rests in the comfort of you being safe. Marc didn’t realize how lucky he was to not know what this was like. Now, he doesn’t know if he can ever forget it.
Jake’s voice is clipped. “Check again.”
They’re all on edge, and it’s terrible. Most of the time, at least one of them manages to keep a level head during stressful situations—usually Marc. Jake is prone to anger, Steven to anxiousness.
“Marc!” Steven yanks him out of his head, and his phone is in his hand without any memory of having taken it out of his pocket. He does a dutiful look through his notifications—nothing.
Three sets of disappointment and concern pile on top of one another and drags them all down so much further.
“Do…” Steven’s voice is quiet. Unsure. “Do you think something might’ve happened to her?”
There is no dissenting opinion, no devil’s advocate. Marc doesn’t try to calm his alters down, and only clenches his jaw.
You’ve never gone quiet on them like this. They’ve never let you leave the flat at night like this. They always opted to be the one to go take a walk because even in the middle of an argument, they wouldn’t risk your safety.
The lingering silence is Steven’s answer.
When the suit wraps itself around his body, the accompanying burst of power in his veins is suffocating. His wounds begin to numb over, but Marc barely notices. He hasn’t spared them a thought since you left.
The cool air does nothing to assuage him. Clouds blot out the sky, leaving nothing but a murky backdrop as he scales up the nearest building for a vantage point. A quick scan over the horizon—nothing. Not a hint of your silhouette under the streetlights, and a lump forms in his throat.
“Khonshu!”
A gust of wind signals the god’s arrival, who, even with a bird’s skull for a head, looks remarkably bored as Marc is clinging to any semblance of sanity. He must already know what’s going on but frustratingly just spreads out his hands, a silent question—what?
Marc grits his teeth. “Where is she?”
“Who?”
“Khonshu.” The name is a snarl on his lips.
He simply scoffs. “You have the gall to make demands? As if I need to be involved with your lover’s spat?”
“She’s not answering her phone.”
A lingering pause.
“She might be in danger,” Marc snaps, trying to get the god to understand even a fraction of the severity of the situation. They might bloody their hands night after night, staining London’s streets each time they go out on patrol, but it’s never enough. There are always more monsters to take their place, and the thought that you might have run into one of them—
Khonshu cocks his head. “Maybe she’s just finally had enough of you.”
Marc hates how that’s a possibility. Still, desperation crawls out of his throat. “Can you find her?”
Khonshu turns to look over the city, the silence stretching out between them. Whatever divinity he’s channeling, Marc isn’t privy to; all he can do is stand there like a useless dumbass and wait for some hint of you to show up on the god’s radar. Even if you had had enough and never want to see him again—he’ll swallow down that fate in stride as long as he knows that you’re safe.
When Khonshu finally breaks from searching, his head cocks slightly to the side. “Interesting.”
This is hardly the time for theatrics. “Do not—”
“I cannot find her,” the god admits. Not apologetic or ashamed, but—awed. “Where she is right now, her footsteps through the city—there is nothing, Marc Spector. There’s not even a trace of her in your own home.”
The blood rushes in his ears. His chest constricts until he can barely breathe at all. Marc barely manages to wrap his head around the information before Jake and Steven come roaring back again, shocked and confused.
“Stupid fucking bird—”
“She was right here!
“Let me out, pendejo, I swear—”
“What the bloody hell does he mean—”
“How?” Is all Marc manages to get out, every one of his senses on overload.
“Something is hiding her from me; whatever took your lover is very powerful indeed.”
Took. Not a single doubt about it now: something took you. Kidnapped you because Marc couldn’t keep it together for ten-fucking-minutes. Jake and Steven can prattle all they want in the background—his mission is clear.
“Where do we start?”
-
The flat seems even bleaker when they return, your absence all the more chilling. Steven clamours to take the reins with the obvious assumption that research is the first step they need to take, but that’s quickly dashed away when Khonshu returns with a name.
“Apep.” God of darkness and disorder, Steven supplies from their head. “He’s been cast away for eons, but there have always been those trying to get him to return.”
“It’s another cult?”
Jake swears under his breath. “Figures.”
Ignoring them, Marc presses on. “Who are we dealing with now?”
“If it were easy to find them, I would’ve done it already,” Khonshu bristles. “Apep is helping them—hiding them as they work. I will continue to do what I can.”
“Fine.”
The god disappears in a whirlwind of loose papers, and Marc switches gears. Steven might have the advantage in research, but tracking? The skills he’s honed as a Marine and as a mercenary wait for him like an old pair of shoes; the others can’t help but let him work in peace.
He finds some old tourist map that spans over the city and unfolds it across the dining table. There are only so many places you would’ve gone, so many routes you could’ve taken. London doesn’t become deserted at night and barring any divine intervention, kidnapping someone would cause a scene—you would have caused a scene, he thinks, imagining you fighting tooth and nail against your assailants, screaming for someone to help—
Marc closes his eyes, clenches his jaw. A wave of pain washes over him, and he languishes in it for a minute, not a moment more.
His eyes reopen, spots dancing across his vision as he analyzes the map again. The feeling has been sealed shut into a box, shoved into a corner of his mind. Steve would throw a fit about his mental state if it were any other time, lecturing him on coping mechanisms and compartmentalization, but there’s no time for him to feel sorry for himself.
He grits his teeth and refocuses his train of thought. If they’re up against a cult, then they probably would’ve sent multiple people to grab you. Would’ve had to lure you somewhere quiet if it was by force, or they could have convinced you to go with them somehow. Or threatened you. Or…
The more he gets into it, the more he feels himself detaching from the situation, piece-by-piece. The memory of you is like a minefield; it’s a testament to his will that he can recall anything about you without breaking down. What you were wearing—and not the look on your face—when you left. Your favourite park—and not how your hand fits perfectly into his as you walked down the paths—that you might have passed through.
He reduces you to intel, just another folder on his desk. It’s not unfamiliar to him. He wouldn’t have made it this far if he couldn’t take an objective approach to his work. But it’s different because it’s you, because the stakes include you, and when he looks up to try to ground himself again, he spots your favourite mug on the coffee table. Half-empty.
-
If Layla were here.
The words bounce around his head as Marc stares up at the ceiling. He didn’t mean it. Steven and Jake are both better with words than Marc, but he’s never loved you any less—he’s never wanted you to be anyone but yourself.
It’s been almost two days since you left, and it’s only now that he’s allowed himself to be corralled into bed. His grip of the hot seat is ironclad, however, which means that the body isn’t getting any sleep tonight. The sun will rise soon, and he’ll pick up his work right where he left off.
Quietly, from the back of his head: “Marc?”
“Could’ve taken the victim anywhere,” Marc murmurs, mind still whirring in the dark.
“’Victim’?” Steven’s voice shifts to be full of indignance. “How could you possibly call her that?”
“Ay, easy on him,” Jake pipes up. For Jake to immediately to jump to his defence means that Marc must be worse off than he thought, but he can’t bring himself to care. “How’s it going, hombre?”
“No sightings on any security cameras. Nothing reported to the cops.” Hours of his time—your time—summarized in a breath. His face remains blank. “I’m going to sweep the remaining areas tomorrow. Find some people who might’ve seen something.”
He’s been doing nothing but cross possibilities off his list. It’s barely any progress and his remaining leads are weak, but his resolve is as strong as ever.
“Nothing from Khonshu?”
“No.” Marc has no idea what the god is doing.
They lay in silence for a bit, listening to the maddening tick-tick-tick of the clock on the wall. Anger is unsustainable, but Marc wishes that they’d return to yelling at him again. At least he knows what to do with that.
Instead, all he gets is Steven’s restrained tone: “Something has to change, you know.”
“Are you really telling me to go to therapy right now?”
“Can’t do much else.” For a moment, Steven’s bitterness resonates. There’s another conversation to be had here—one about their individual capabilities and protective natures—but Marc lets it rest for the night. He knows he’d be driven up the wall if their situation was reversed, if you were in danger and he had to rely on someone else to save you.
He still deflects. “Not the time for this.”
“Maybe not,” Steven concedes, “but you need help, Marc.”
Distantly, Marc recognizes that he’s always needed help. Even after reconciling with Steven and Jake, even after meeting you—the wounds are still there, despite how hard he’s tried to ignore them. He’s stubborn and self-destructive, not stupid.
“We’re with you, always,” Jake adds. Discomfort crawls under Marc’s skin from the supportive words, and he knows that his alters are well aware of it. It’s never stopped them, of course.
“We can talk about this after—after we save her.”
A general murmur of consensus. Marc quickly regains his footing, eager to move on from this line of conversation.
“I’ll find something. Or Khonshu will.” Steady and reassured—trying to convince them and himself. “We’ll get her back.”
Steven’s voice is small, even in the confines of their head. “But why would they take her in the first place?”
-
“He needs an avatar?” The body hasn’t slept in days. That void of feeling pulses with anger, desperation, fear—it simmers low in their gut, a torch passed along between them.
“Apep will need a vessel once they release him.”
“Here I thought one of his cultists would volunteer.”
Khonshu taps his staff against the ground thoughtfully. “They knew we would come after them, and we’re not the only ones.”
For the briefest of moments, Marc feels hopeful, like the odds aren’t as stacked against them as they thought. It disappears just as fast—Khonshu doesn’t deliver hope. The blood drains out of his face as he actually starts to consider the god’s words.
“If Apep possesses your precious lover, would you really be able to stop her? To take up arms against her?”
Khonshu leans in close then, hollowed eyes burrowing into him.
“Would you let others do the same?”
-
Over the next week, things begin to look up.
Someone’s girlfriend’s cousin says that they saw someone who looked like you walking down The Mall. There’s a fuzzy image of a car with no license plates. Khonshu catches the briefest hint of you on Westminster Bridge and follows you far, far east—it’s a mere grain of information that’s slipped through Apep’s power, but it’s enough for Marc.
They find the car abandoned in Dover, near the water. It rules out France—driving through the Eurochannel would’ve been the fastest route there, after all. Trying to take a public ferry would’ve been stupid with a captive, which means that they probably chartered or owned a boat.
The remaining pieces fall into place, and he can feel the anticipation from the others build in the background. Marc has led the charge so far with very few breaks to let Steven and Jake breathe a little. Steven misses you so much, he cries whenever he fronts. Jake has gone eerily quiet, and Marc knows what’s simmering underneath the surface; when the fighting starts, Jake will be called to action. His excitement is brutal.
It's all coming to an end soon. Laying on some dirt in the Norwegian countryside, shrouded in darkness, Marc’s never seen more stars in his life. If he’s right—and he is right—they’ll be bringing you to a nearby compound for the final step of their ritual. He couldn’t care less about the how or why. Come the morning, you’ll be here. Marc will get them inside. Jake will get to you. And then…
Marc will probably never be the partner that you deserve, and you never should’ve been subjected to his life. To sleepless nights and patching up his injuries and comforting him after nightmares that has him thrashing in the sheets—
But he can’t survive without you. It’s a simple little fact that gives him the power to move mountains; there are none bigger than the mess of his own head.
Exhaustion creeps up on him, and he can’t help but struggle against it. Fighting to keep his eyes open, his thoughts spill into the air. “Need to take care of her first.”
“Taking care of yourself is taking care of her,” Steven says gently. Have they had this conversation already? Marc’s been so singled in on this mission that everything else has fallen by the wayside. He can’t remember the last thing he ate, or what he’s wearing under the suit. The ground is the softest thing he’s ever felt.
If there’s any comparison to be made between you and Layla, it’s that he’s failed both of you. Maybe he could be different this time. Even if you decide that you want nothing to do with him after all this, he could still get help. He’ll have Steven and Jake. He’ll have himself and his scrappy resolve and the memories of this heart-aching pain, and maybe he’ll finally get better.
Marc lets his eyes close; the body needs rest for what’s to come. You don’t deserve any less than their best.
Just a few more hours.
-
Marc watches the fight from their headspace. Jake doesn’t miss a single shot and never so much as falters when one of them manages to land a hit. This is the longest break Marc’s gotten from fronting in a while, but he can’t bring himself to look away.
Jake loops their arm around the neck of cultist unlucky enough to be nearby, gripping his hair so hard Marc can nearly feel the strands through his fingers, feel it when Jake jerks their arm to the side and twists—
-
Your handlers left you alone in another room with nothing but a hard cot to curl into as you waited for them to retrieve you again. Locked inside but unbound—Marc hates how you startle when he breaks through the door.
Eyes wide, your mouth opens and closes multiple times without success. “You—you came.”
Marc wishes there weren’t so much surprise in your tone. Of course he came for you, it was never a choice for him—for any of them.
But clearly there was a part of you that thought he wouldn’t, wasn’t there? That he might just leave you in the clutches of some power-hungry cult because—because what, you’re not his ex-wife? Because you think he doesn’t love you?
The need to rectify that pierces his heart. He pulls you close, knuckles white in your shirt. “I love you.”
You shake in his arms. “Marc—”
“I love you.”
The words don’t stop; they fall from his lips like a prayer. Even as you weep, soaking the suit with your tears, he says it. I love you. I love you. I love you. In every variation, in every way—he’ll never let you believe otherwise again. He’ll say it over and over, work tirelessly to become the man you both deserve. For the rest of your lives. For the rest of time.
However long you’ll give him.
1K notes · View notes
alwaysmicado · 2 months ago
Text
Nightcall
10.4k | 18+ MDNI | Marc Spector x f!reader
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Moon Knight Masterlist | AO3
Warnings: angst, smut, oral sex (f receiving), fingering, unprotected piv, biting, rough & emotionally intense sex, multiple orgasms, possessive!Marc, choking, spitting, creampie, toxic dynamic Summary: Marc is a bad habit you can’t shake. A/N: This idea has been haunting my dreams like Marc has been haunting reader’s. And just like reader, I couldn’t resist the allure of this elusive, rugged, and devastatingly addictive man. Could you? Happy reading (even though it hurts) and let me know what you think! *Marc lifts & flips you with ease (he’s MK, duh). Dividers by @/cafekitsune.
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One year. 
It’s been one year since you’ve last seen him. 
One whole year of wondering where he is, if he’s left for good this time, if he’s even still alive. 
You’ve tried to fill the void in your heart, started smoking again, gave the nice guy from the coffee shop down the block a chance. He’s kind to you, makes you laugh, brings you flowers, and you think you could grow to love him.
You’re trying. 
You’re trying so hard. 
To forget, to forgive, to heal, to live. 
And now he’s back. In your life, standing at your door at 1 a.m.
Marc Spector.
The bane of your existence.
You were lounging on your couch in your pajamas mere moments ago, the soft glow of the TV casting shadows on the walls, when a knock at the door shattered the peace you’d begun to find. Your heart stopped, your head jerking towards the door.
It couldn’t be.
You heard his voice, rough and familiar, sending a jolt through your entire being.
“It’s me,” he said, his voice muffled but unmistakable.
You stood, your legs trembling, walking closer to the door in a trance, bare feet on the wooden floor, your hand hovering over the doorknob. You didn’t answer, but you couldn’t tear yourself away.
He was alive. He came back.
Marc came back to you.
What now?
Taking a deep breath, you look through the peephole, and your heart flutters when you see his face. He looks as handsome as ever, broad shoulders stretching the fabric of his t-shirt, dark curls hidden under a baseball cap, beard stubble a little grayer than the last time you’ve seen him.
But there’s a weariness in his eyes, a deep exhaustion that pulls at your heartstrings.
He’s tired.
You know he is.
He’s told you in the rare moments he’d let you in, your sweat-covered bodies tangled in your bed, his fingers brushing over your cheek.
You’d see a spark of something in his warm eyes then. Something akin to sadness, longing, regret. But it would disappear after a few seconds, and he’d harden again, turning around to gather his clothes, telling you he needed to go.
You’d find new scars on his body every time he came to see you. He’d show up with barely scabbed-over cuts, a black eye, a dislocated shoulder, a split lip. And you’d patch him up, kissing it all better.
You stopped asking how he got his injuries some time ago. He’d always give you the same answer anyway.
“Just a scratch, baby. Nothing to worry your pretty head about.”
Whatever it is that keeps him going, it has more power over him than you ever will.
Tears blur your vision, and you slide down the door, sitting with your back against it. You want to stay strong, to remember the pain he’s caused you, but his words cut through your resolve like a knife.
“Come on, let me in. I came all this way to see you.”
It feels like he’s been out there for hours, but you know it can’t have been more than two minutes. Why is this happening?
“Let me in, Sunshine. Please.” 
You blink back tears, shaking your head even though he can’t see you, your hands balled into fists, fingernails digging into your palms.
Every time.
Every time, he rips open the wounds he inflicted on you, and you know this time won’t be any different. You want to resist him, want to tell him to go to hell, that he can’t keep doing this to you, that you’ve finally had enough.
But you can’t do it, can you?
Resist Marc.
You both know you can’t. And deep down, under all the bullshit you like to tell yourself, under all the anger, under all the resentment, you know you don’t want to.
You never did. 
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Going for a smoke outside the bar, goosebumps forming on your bare arms as the wind blew and the rain fell, your feet sore from being caged in high heels for hours, the only thing you wanted was a minute of quiet, a minute where you didn’t have to smile or act like you were having fun.
You were tired—tired of the noise, tired of the people, tired of the pretense.
All you wanted was a moment of peace.
“Shit,” you muttered, staring at your lighter in disbelief as it refused to spark, tears of sheer frustration pricking the corners of your eyes. Leaning against the cool brick wall, you let your head fall back, eyes closed, trying to shut out the world.
How did it get like this? How did you get like this? 
Deep down, you know you don’t have anyone to blame but yourself. The problem is you. Not the world, not your parents, not the shitty things that have happened to you. It’s you. It’s always been you.
“Need a light?” a voice cut through the rain, smooth and unexpected. 
You opened your eyes slightly, just enough to see a stranger standing a few feet away. “Yeah, mine apparently hates me,” you replied, lifting the offending object.
The man chuckled, a warm sound that contrasted with the cold night. “Here,” he said, stepping closer. His dark eyes sparkled with mischief, his smirk stirring something inside you. “I got you, Sunshine.”
He pulled out a sleek silver lighter, flicking it open with practiced ease, producing a small, steady flame. You put your cigarette between your lips, leaning in to catch the light. His eyes never left yours, a connection forming in that brief moment. He then lit his own cigarette, taking a drag.
The first inhale of nicotine calmed your nerves slightly, a welcome distraction from the chaos inside your mind. “Thanks,” you muttered, leaning back against the wall and savoring the moment of quiet.
“No problem,” he nodded, staring into the surrounding darkness.
He was closer now, leaning against the wall next to you, his presence oddly comforting. 
“Rough night?”
“You could say that.” You let out a dry laugh, glancing at him. He was handsome in a rugged way—dark curls, full lips, broad chest, with a confident air that was alluring. “What about you?”
He shrugged, a small smile playing on his lips. “Rough night.”
You studied him for a moment, noting the gentle curve of his nose and the laugh lines in the outer corner of his eyes. You also noticed his split knuckles in the neon glow of the party lights hanging above.
“I guess we’re both running from something,” you said softly, taking another drag of your cigarette.
“Is that so?” He smiled at you with a raised eyebrow and you smiled back. “I’m Marc, by the way.” 
You gave him your name and shook his hand, feeling a strange jolt at the contact. “Nice to meet you, Marc. Thanks for the light.”
“Anytime,” he said, his expression turning pensive.
You both smoked in silence for a while, the rain a soothing backdrop to your thoughts.
When your cigarettes were nearly finished, Marc turned towards you, his movements smooth and deliberate. He leaned in, his hand bracing against the wall next to your head, bringing his face and body close to yours, his eyes locked onto yours with an intensity that made your heart skip a beat.
“Wanna get out of here?” he asked, his eyes dropping from your eyes to your lips with unmistakable intent. 
You hesitated for a second, brow furrowed, thoughts swirling. The rain fell around you in a soft patter. You searched his eyes and found something, something that promised a temporary escape from your hollow existence.
You didn’t have anything to lose.
“Yeah,” you said, putting out your cigarette with your shoe.
You ended the night with him on top of you, in your bed, all your troubles wiped away for a couple of hours. His hands roamed your body with a hunger that matched your own, and for the first time in a long while, you felt alive. 
You thought it was just a one-night stand since he left as soon as you both came down, and you fell asleep, spent and satisfied.
Until he showed up at your door late at night, two weeks later.
There he was, standing in the hallway with that same charming smile, holding up a pack of cigarettes and his silver lighter. “Mind if I come in?” he asked, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.
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And that’s how it all started. This…thing you have going on.
“I missed you,” he’d whisper in your ear, his voice rough with longing as he was buried deep inside of you. “My beautiful girl.”
Those words would wrap around your heart, suffusing you with a warmth that felt like everything you had ever wanted. In those fleeting moments, it was as if all the pain and uncertainty melted away, leaving only the intoxicating sensation of being cherished, if only for a little while. But then, like always, he would leave, and the cold reality would set in.
He would tell you he couldn’t stay, but not why. His eyes would darken with unspoken burdens, and he’d brush a kiss against your forehead, promising he’d be back.
Yet, he never told you it was for your safety. He never mentioned the shadows that lurked around him, the dangers he faced on a daily basis. He didn’t tell you about the battles he fought, tooth and nail, just to carve out a few hours to be with you.
He didn’t tell you any of this, and after some time, you stopped asking. The questions died on your lips, replaced by a resigned acceptance. You accepted that you’d never be more to Marc than a brief escape, a distraction from whatever demons haunted him.
Well, your brain did.
But not your heart.
Your heart clung to every whispered endearment, every stolen touch, every heated kiss that promised more than he could ever give. Your heart held onto the belief that maybe, just maybe, one day he’d stay. That one day, this torturous cycle of brief encounters and long absences would end.
You’d lie in bed after he left, the sheets still warm from his presence, his scent lingering in the air. You’d replay the moments in your mind, his whispered words, the way he looked at you as if you were his salvation. You’d clutch your pillow, trying to hold onto the ghost of his touch, knowing that come morning, the loneliness would creep back in.
Every time he returned, it was like a balm to your wounded soul. He’d pull you into his arms, his kiss desperate, as if he was drowning and you were his only breath of air. 
And for those precious hours, you’d let yourself believe that you were his beautiful girl, his light in a world filled with darkness, that he needed you as much as you needed him.
He’d leave again, the door closing softly behind him, and you’d be left alone. You’d tell yourself that it was enough, that these stolen moments were worth the heartache. 
But deep down, you knew it wasn’t. 
You always knew that your heart was breaking a little more each time he walked away. 
And you know now that any resolve you’ve built up over the past year will crumble the second you open the door and look into his eyes.
It’s always the same.
No matter how sick and tired you are of his careless behavior, no matter how many times he chews you up and spits you out, no matter how many nights you spend crying over him, mourning him, cursing him, self-hatred wrapping around you like a suffocating blanket.
You let him in. You let him do this to you. 
Because you love him. Because you’re a fool.
Slowly, reluctantly, you stand, heart pounding, blood rushing in your ears. You sigh deeply, and before you can stop yourself, your hand turns the knob, opening the door just a crack.
Marc pushes the door open wider, his eyes meeting yours for a brief moment, and before you realize what’s happening, his cap is on the floor and his lips are on yours. His arms wrap around you, pulling you close as he kicks the door shut behind him. He spins you around, pressing you against the wall with a desperate need that makes you dizzy.
“I missed you, Sunshine,” he murmurs against your lips, his hands roaming your body.
“Don’t call me that,” you protest, your palms pressed against his pecs.
He smiles. “But it’s who you are. My Sunshine.”
“I’m not your anything, Marc,” you hiss, trying to push him away. He doesn’t budge. “I’m a warm body for you to fuck. That’s it.”
“That’s not all you are to me,” he says without missing a beat, brows furrowed, thumb brushing over your lower lip with a maddening gentleness. “Why so hostile, Sunshine? Aren’t you happy to see me?”
There it is. That damn look. Concern, care, and hunger, all mingling in his eyes, breaking down your defenses bit by bit.
“Are you fucking kidding, Marc?” you snap, snatching his wrist to stop him from touching you. “You–you were gone for a year. No goodbye, no message, no nothing.”
His gaze doesn’t waver as he cups your face with both hands, and despite yourself, you let go of his wrist.
“I’m here now, aren’t I?” The warmth in his eyes and the soft smile on his lips make you want to throw up. You turn your head, your chest heaving.
He gently but firmly pushes your head back, his hands still cradling your face, forcing you to meet his gaze once more. His grip is firm but not painful, a reminder of his strength and control—the same strength that has always thrilled you.
“Hey,” he says softly, his eyes boring into yours, pleading. “I’m here now.”
You’re stunned, frozen in place like a deer in headlights, about to be run over.
It’s too late for you.
All you see is him, the man who has torn your heart to pieces and yet somehow still holds it in his hands.
The world narrows to the space between you, and the chaos of your mind falls silent. You’re ready to die in this moment if it means feeling his touch again.
You give an almost imperceptible nod, a surrender, and his lips are on yours instantly.
The kiss is desperate, a clash of lust and guilt, his mouth moving against yours with a ferocity that leaves you breathless. His hands move down your sides to your waist, pulling you closer as if he can’t bear the distance between you for even a second longer.
You moan into his mouth, your body responding to his touch despite your mind’s protests. Your arms wrap around him, pulling him even closer, needing to feel every inch of him against you. The taste of him is intoxicating, a mix of smoke and mint, and it floods your senses, drowning out the pain, the questions, the doubts.
Marc’s hands urgently explore the contours of your back, pressing you against him, reveling in your scent. You can feel the hard lines of his body, the heat of his skin, and it’s all too much and not enough at the same time. Your back hits the wall again, and he pins you there, his mouth leaving yours to trail hot, open-mouthed kisses down your neck.
One hand finds your breast, groping it for a moment, palm rubbing against your hard nipple, his touch needy and rough. Your breath comes in ragged gasps, his name escaping your lips in a broken whisper. He groans in response, the sound vibrating against your skin.
Impatient, his fingers hook into the waistband of your pajama pants, yanking them down along with your panties with practiced ease. You step out of them, exposed, his leg pressing against your core.
You can’t help but buck your hips against him, your body moving on its own accord, driven by pent-up desire and anger. Your hands fist his shirt, gripping the fabric tightly as if it’s the only thing anchoring you to reality. His hands are on your ass, kneading your flesh with possessive urgency, each squeeze sending shivers of pleasure through your body.
Marc’s mouth is everywhere, hot and insistent, licking a slow, deliberate stripe from behind your ear down your neck. The sensation makes you gasp, your back arching. He sucks and nips at your skin, frenzied and desperate, leaving a trail of bruises that mark you as his, each one a bittersweet reminder of the fleeting connection you share.
The contrast between the roughness of his hands and the wet heat of his mouth drives you wild, every touch igniting a fire inside you that you can’t control.
“Marc,” you moan, your voice a mix of frustration and need. Your nails dig into his shoulders, pulling him closer, urging him on. He responds with a growl, his teeth grazing your neck before biting down, the sharp pain making you gasp.
“God, I’ve missed this,” he murmurs against your skin, his voice thick with desire. His hands grip your ass harder, lifting your leg slightly so he can grind against you, his hardness pressing against your core, sending waves of pleasure through you.
You throw your head back, giving him better access to your neck as he continues to lick, suck, and bite with abandon, each mark he leaves on your skin feeling like a brand, a claim that you both know will fade but never truly disappear.
“More,” you whisper, your breathing shallow. “Please, I need more.” You reach between your bodies, sliding your hand down his hard torso, rubbing his bulge over the rough fabric of his jeans.
Marc groans and pulls back just enough to look into your glazed-over eyes, his own filled with lust and something deeper, something that makes your heart ache. “I’ll give you everything, baby,” he promises, his hands moving to cup your face as he kisses you again, his lips searing and demanding.
You can feel the truth in his words, even if only for this moment, and you let yourself believe it. 
He bites your bottom lip and pulls back with a growl, dropping to his knees, spreading your thighs and pressing his mouth to your core. Your brain takes a few seconds to catch up with what’s happening, your mind foggy, your heart racing.
“Marc, wait,” you gasp, your hands tangling in his hair as his tongue flicks out, teasing your aching clit. “I haven’t—oh fuck—I haven’t showered.”
“I don’t care,” he murmurs, his hot breath fanning over your sensitive skin.
The sensation is overwhelming, his tongue lapping at your folds with a hunger that makes your knees weak. You gasp, your hips bucking involuntarily against his face. He groans in response, reveling in the scent and wetness you’re spreading all over his face, cursing under his breath as his cock strains against the inside of his jeans.
His hands tighten their grip on your thighs, holding you open for him, keeping you steady as his tongue and lips work with practiced precision to make you lose control.
Your head falls back, hitting the wall with a dull thud, but you barely notice. Every flick of his tongue, every suck on your clit sends waves of pleasure crashing through you. Your hands tighten in his hair, pulling him closer, needing more, fingernails scraping his scalp.
“Marc,” you moan, your voice a mix of desperation and bliss, your body trembling under this relentless, sweet torture. “Oh fuck, Marc.”
Hearing you moan his name is like gasoline on a fire, fueling his desire.
“God, you taste so good,” he pants against your skin, his voice filled with raw need, drunk with lust. “Always so fucking perfect.”
Your body trembles as he hums against you, his tongue alternating between slow, teasing licks and fast, desperate flicks before sucking on your swollen clit again.
You can feel the tension building inside you, coiling tighter and tighter with each passing second.
“Please,” you beg, your voice a shaky whisper. “I need you inside me.”
He responds without hesitation, his tongue plunging into your wet heat, tasting you, drinking you, fucking you with ruthless intensity. You cry out, your back arching off the wall as the pleasure becomes almost too much to bear. He replaces his tongue with his middle and ring fingers, sliding them inside you, curling them just right, hitting that perfect spot. His mouth devours you simultaneously, desperately, like a man starved.
Your hips buck harder, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps as he finger-fucks you in rhythm with his licks. The dual assault of his tongue and fingers is overwhelming, pushing you ever closer to the edge.
Your nails rake across his scalp, and he groans against you, the vibrations sending ripples of ecstasy through your core.
You can barely form a coherent thought, your mind hazy as you can’t hold back the moans escaping your lips. Marc starts sucking on your clit with renewed vigor, the sensation sending you spiraling. You’re on the brink, the tension inside you coiled so tightly it’s about to snap.
The wet sounds of your pussy fill the air, blending with the rhythmic beat of your heart pounding in your chest. He can feel your body tensing, the telltale signs of your impending climax, and it drives him wild.
“Fuck,” you gasp, your voice barely more than a whisper. “Fuck, I’m gonna–”
You don’t get to finish the sentence before you shatter into a million pieces, every nerve ending ablaze with euphoric release. Marc doesn’t stop, doesn’t let up, holding onto your hip, continuing to lap at you and move his fingers, drawing out every last tremor until you’re left trembling and spent.
For a brief, blissful moment, you feel pure, unadulterated happiness, your fingers absentmindedly running through Marc’s hair. But as reality slowly sets back in, your living room coming back into view, Marc’s mouth on your core starting to become uncomfortable, the weight of what just happened begins to dawn on you. Your eyes meet his, and you feel it all crashing down on you—confusion, heartache, regret.
Marc finally pulls back, his face and fingers glistening with your arousal, a satisfied, almost smug grin on his lips.
He stands, his hands finding your cheeks as he presses his wet lips against yours, sliding his tongue inside. You close your eyes and wrap your arms around his waist, tasting yourself on his lips, your body buzzing with the aftermath of your orgasm.
“You miss me?” he whispers against your lips before pulling back enough to look into your wide eyes. The warmth of his breath mingles with yours, and his gaze is filled with an intensity that makes your heart clench painfully.
The casualness of his question tears at you, as if you had seen each other just yesterday, as if he hadn’t just given you an earth-shattering orgasm after crushing your heart with his bare hands.
And all after you swore to yourself you’d never let him do this again.
You want to hate him, you really do. But how could you? He came back from the dead to see you. You know he needs you right now, so how could you deny him?
You nod, feeling tears well up in your eyes, swallowing heavily. “Always,” you whisper, your voice breaking with emotion.
A smile spreads across Marc’s lips, his eyes softening for a moment, and he captures your lips in a deep, fervent kiss again, as if trying to convey everything he can’t put into words. Then, with a gentle but firm grip, he lifts you up, your legs instinctively wrapping around his waist. You cling to him, head buried in the crook of his neck, your hands gripping his shoulders as he carries you towards your bedroom.
He clocks the bouquet of pink roses on your dining room table, notices the little card standing next to the vase. There’s a strawberry drawn on the front, but it’s too dark for him to read what he just assumes to be a lame pun about loving you ‘berry’ much. 
How cute.
Marc lays you down on the bed, his body pressed against yours, trailing kisses down your neck. You wrap your legs around his waist again, rubbing yourself against his bulge, impatient, hands tangled in his curls.
“Not yet, baby,” he whispers in your ear, nibbling on your earlobe, reveling in the needy noises you make, how you squirm under him, trying to get him to move and give you what you want.
He will. But first, he wants to look at you—at your beautiful body, every inch of your skin.
He gets off the bed and you scoot back, fluffing up your pillows and leaning against them with your back. You watch as Marc turns on the bedside lamp and removes his shirt, revealing the hard lines of his muscles and the scars that tell the story of battles you’re clueless about. He kicks off his shoes, his eyes never leaving yours. When he unbuckles his belt, ready to pull his pants down and fuck you already, his eyes drop down to your wet pussy, and he decides differently.
“Take off your shirt and show me how you played with yourself while I was away.”
Your hands tremble slightly as you pull your shirt over your head, your skin prickling with anticipation. You feel exposed, vulnerable, but the look in Marc’s eyes makes you feel desired, wanted. You spread your legs wide and slide your hand down your body, your fingers finding your clit, rubbing in slow, deliberate circles. Your other hand moves to your breast, teasing your nipple, and you let out a soft moan, your eyes locked on Marc.
His gaze darkens with lust as he watches you, jeans on the floor, spitting in his hand, wrapping it around his cock, stroking himself slowly. “God, you’re beautiful,” he murmurs, his voice thick with need. “Keep going.”
God, how much he wants to bury himself deep inside of you, to feel your warm, wet pussy pulsing around his cock, to fuck all his frustrations into you, to hear your sweet moans, to feel your soft skin pressed against his.
It’s all he wants.
All he can think about when he’s away from you. All he needs in nights like this. 
You increase the pace of your fingers, your breath coming in short, ragged gasps as the pleasure builds. Marc’s eyes don’t leave you for a second, his hand moving faster on his cock, mirroring the rhythm of your movements.
“You have no idea how much I missed this,” he pants. “Missed you.”
Fuelled by his poisonous words, your hips buck against your hand, the tension coiling tighter and tighter in your core. “Marc,” you moan, your voice a desperate plea. “I’m close.”
His eyes burn into yours as he moves swiftly, crawling onto the bed and positioning himself between your legs. He nudges your hand away and replaces it with his own, his fingers sliding inside you in one smooth motion, his thumb rubbing your clit.
“Let go, baby. Come for me.”
And with his words, you shatter, your orgasm crashing over you in waves, your pussy clamping down around his fingers, pulsating, your hands gripping the sheets. Marc watches you intently, his own breath ragged, cock throbbing so close to your dripping hole. 
The ecstatic feeling coursing through you turns into uncomfortable overstimulation quickly, so you grab his wrist, and he withdraws his fingers, giving you a moment to come down. 
You look so fucking gorgeous like this. Eyes glazed over, looking at him like he’s all you see, like he’s all you need. But as Marc holds your gaze, your chest rising and falling, he also sees something else in your big, beautiful eyes. 
Sadness. 
It’s a deep sadness he knows he’s responsible for—a sadness that cuts through the layers of detachment, apathy, and composure he’s built up to survive the trials in his life. Despite everything, there remains a gentle, tender part hidden deep inside him. A part that makes him vulnerable, scared, and like he could be the man you need…if only things were different.
“My Sunshine,” he says softly, his knuckles brushing over your hot cheek. The tenderness in his touch contrasts sharply with the storm of emotions inside him. He leans over you, and the kiss he presses on your lips is soft, oh so soft. 
It’s intense. Intense and unexpected.
It’s easier to push aside your feelings when he’s rough with you. It’s easier to tell yourself you’re just two lonely people fucking to feel a little less lonely if all you can focus on is your body.
But then he pulls shit like this and it gives you hope that you might mean something to him. And after years of asking yourself if he’s just an asshole who gets off on playing mind games, or if he doesn’t care enough to realize what he’s doing is killing you, you’re not sure you want to know the answer.
Marc pulls you out of your thoughts when he releases your lips and pulls back slightly, his eyes darkening with a different kind of intensity as he traces your bottom lip with his thumb. 
“Open your mouth.”
You obey, parting your lips, your breath hitching in anticipation. Marc lets a strand of spit drop into your mouth, slowly, deliberately, watching as it lands in the back of your throat, and you swallow it without hesitation.
“Good girl,” he murmurs, his voice thick with desire, kissing and nibbling on your jaw, your neck, down to your breast, circling your nipple with the tip of his tongue before sucking it into his eager mouth. 
“Marc…” you whine, looking down, threading your fingers through his disheveled hair, your heart pounding. You let yourself get lost in him, in the way he touches you, in the way he makes you feel alive. And as you do, you can’t stop the words tumbling from your lips.
“Please stay.”
Marc pauses, his mouth still on your breast, his body tensing. He releases your nipple and looks up at you, his brow furrowing at your watery eyes.
He hates to see you like this.
“You know I can’t,” he says, his calm voice betraying none of the guilt that’s clawing at his heart, making it hard for him to breathe.
But he can’t comfort you. Not now. Not when you’re supposed to be his salvation. Not when he knows it’d be a lie.
He sits back on his heels between your spread legs, his eyes never leaving yours as he pumps his painfully hard cock.
“Why?” you whisper, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. “Why?”
Marc leans over you, arms braced next to your head, capturing your quivering lips with his, preventing you from making him feel worse than he already does.
You moan into his mouth and he can’t wait anymore. Needs to be inside you. Needs to make it all right.
He shifts in closer, pressing his cock against you, just sliding it between your folds, up and down, letting out a raspy sigh at the friction of it. His cock gathers your wetness quickly—you’re always so fucking wet for him.
Before falling asleep on whatever cot he’d find himself on, he’d sometimes allow himself to fantasize about waking up next to you, feeling your warm body, hearing your soft breathing, sliding his hand down the front of your panties, and feeling how wet you are from dreaming about him.
His breath catches in his throat just thinking about it.
“Marc…” you plead, and he smiles to himself—it usually takes far longer for you to start begging, so it must mean you really missed him. You squirm again, hips twisting like you’re trying to get him inside you, and he watches you intently, soaking up every little expression, every little moan, every little plea.
“What do you want, baby?” he murmurs, dragging it out just a little bit longer. He loves to hear you, loves to get you to admit it. For you, the truth is in the action of it, but he likes to listen to you say it out loud.
“You,” you moan desperately. “I need you, Marc. I missed you so fucking much, I can’t take it anymore.” 
“Yeah?” he murmurs with an imperceptible smile. 
“Uh-huh,” you nod, staring up into his eyes.
Marc’s cock twitches at the genuine need he can see in your eyes, the sight like a potent drug going straight to his brain and filling him with more bliss than anything else could. He knows what you like, knows what buttons to push, knows exactly how to touch you to make you forget the world around you. 
It makes him feel good to make you feel good. It always has.
And it’s more than the gratification of feeling your pussy pulsating around his cock or hearing you scream his name while your orgasm overtakes you. It’s more than his pride, his ego, his need to feel like he’s doing good for once in his life. 
It’s you.
It’s his misguided effort to make up for all his misdeeds. His atonement. He tells himself it’s enough for him to fuck your brains out, to pour all of himself into you without inhibitions while he’s with you to offset his absence.
He tells himself that, holds onto it—needs it to be true.
“Please…” you whine, and he pushes up against your clit, feeling the pulse of it. You shudder at the intensity, the pressure, and he grins. “Fuck. Fuck me.”
“Dirty mouth,” he chides, and you whine in frustration as he brings his hand up, pressing one finger to your slightly parted lips. You open them wider, suck his finger in, suckle for a moment and then bite.
“Fuck me,” you demand, voice muffled and tongue pressing against his fingertip, wet and warm.
Your teeth loosen up and he slides his finger deeper, right to the back of your tongue. You don’t gag, just stare him down defiantly, and he can’t wait any longer. He reaches down with his other hand, guides himself to your entrance, cock pushing deep into the tight heat of you, as slow as he can stand it. 
You’re so fucking good. 
His head starts to roll back instinctively, but he holds it steady and slides his hand over to your hip, gripping your flesh as his cock splits you open.
When he’s fully sheathed inside of you, you let out a low moan, brows furrowing, throwing your head back against the pillows. He pulls back a little only to drive right back in, hard, and this time you moan a hell of a lot louder. Quickly, he stifles the sound with his palm, pressing his hand right over your mouth—not because he doesn’t want to hear you. No, because he knows it heightens your pleasure.
Your resulting moans are muffled against his hand as you start trying to meet his thrusts, your hips working towards him, desperate for it. You love it when he smothers you like this, love feeling his big hand over your face. 
He first discovered the power of it when you were arguing about something silly and you wouldn’t shut up—he did it jokingly, only to be surprised when you immediately fell silent. You didn’t even push him away or do anything obnoxious like lick his palm; you just went totally compliant. It was an instant reaction, as though it was something your body was conditioned to obey.
He grips your hip, feeling your soft skin against his palm, his other hand covering your mouth as he thrusts into you hard, until the bed is rocking rhythmically against the wall. The hand on your hip slides higher, over your belly, groping your breast, pinching your hard nipple. His other hand slips from your mouth and you’re panting now, your face hot and almost grimacing, your whole body taut and tense for him. 
But then his hands meet at your throat, and you go limp, your lips stretching into an exhausted smile. He keeps his hands still, just on either side of your neck, curled around your shoulders, his thumbs across your collarbones. 
“Go on,” you say breathlessly, biting your lip in anticipation, lifting up your head in order to strain a little against his hands. He says nothing, smiling wickedly back at you, his hips working shallowly, cock thrusting against your G-spot.
“Go on,” you whine, impatient, and he wants to say, “What?” and grin sardonically and make you beg for it, but he’s too greedy, eager just like you are. 
He wraps his fingers around your throat and squeezes, quick and sudden, watching your pupils dilate and your lips fall open. You’d let him choke you to death if he wasn’t careful, he’s sure—you get so fucking caught up in it—so he has to be vigilant, letting go when you look like you’re about to pass out.
It’s difficult to judge, though. You look blissed out already, and he can feel your tendons working against his fingers as he jabs his thumb just under your jaw, tightening his grip. You make these sounds—gasps at first, and then little choking coughs, your throat all raw, and all the while he’s thrusting into you, hard and fast.
He eases off a second, lets you catch your breath, and you draw it in, hoarse and gasping, looking dazed. Almost high. 
You jerk your chin at him as if to say, “C’mon, again, what are you waiting for?” and he complies, one hand this time, big enough to reach quite a way around your neck. His other hand snakes down the center of you, down between your legs, along your hot skin to where he disappears inside, your slick folds parting to let him in. He teases with his fingers, finds your clit, gentle there even as he’s gripping your throat so tight he’ll probably leave marks. 
You buck wildly against him and he holds you down, grinning, relentless, finger flickering over your clit as he fucks you, chokes you, brings you closer and closer to the edge—
He feels your fingers digging into his shoulders, his back, then his arms, grabbing frantically at him as your whole body tenses, and you’re spluttering out a desperate, “Yes, yes,” and then he feels that same clenching around his cock, a quick spasm, so tight he can’t help but groan. 
You come with your eyes shut and your mouth open, and he keeps going a moment longer than he needs to, stroking you where you’re oversensitive, making you shake and squirm. 
Marc lets go of your throat and takes ahold of your breast instead, chasing his own release, fucking you harder and harder and closing his eyes because you’re gazing at him in that way that chips away at his resolve.
“Slow down,” you suddenly whisper, so full of him, so desperate to keep it that way.
He slows down minimally. “Why?”
“I–I don’t want….” you trail off as he licks and sucks on your neck, his hand groping your breast. “Please, I don’t want it to end…” 
He pulls back a little and just…smiles at you, that irritating smile that says, “You honestly still think you’re in control here?” 
It wouldn’t bother you as much if you weren’t still processing that he’s actually here, flesh and blood, after abandoning you, and having the balls to act like the past year didn’t happen. Like he didn’t stab your heart and leave you to bleed out slowly.
“I know you don’t want me to slow down,” he pants in your ear as he picks up the pace again, alternating between shallow thrusts that hit your G-spot perfectly, and deep thrusts that make you gasp. “You want me to fuck you like your little boyfriend never could.”
You freeze. Marc’s labored breathing, the wet sounds of your pussy, the sound of rain coming from outside your window—it all becomes white noise as your brain catches up with what he just said to you.
And then something snaps inside you. 
Something primal, violent, desperate.
You grab the nape of his neck and pull him down for a bruising kiss, biting his lips hard, tongue swirling around his, the taste of blood in your mouth making your head spin. Marc moans into your mouth, but he doesn’t stop you, doesn’t stop his own movements inside you.
You feel yourself getting closer and closer again, and you hate it. You fucking hate that he’s doing this to you. And you hate even more that you’re letting him.  
He pulls away and buries his face in the crook of your neck, his bloody lips staining your shoulder. You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him deeper inside you as your nails rake down his arms, leaving angry red trails in their wake. You claw at his back, holding onto him with all you have. He groans at the pain and looks into your eyes, reveling in the pure need he can see in them.
You see how much it turns him on to see you like this, and it makes you even angrier.
Marc leans in to kiss you again, but before you know what’s happening, your hand shoots up to his throat, fingers digging into his jaw, pushing his face away. He growls at you and tries to kiss you anyway, stubborn and unyielding, his lips brushing against yours despite your resistance. You buck your hips and twist your body, trying to dislodge him, your hands pushing and shoving at his chest and shoulders.
You manage to get one hand around his throat, squeezing as hard as you can, your nails digging into his skin. Marc groans, his breath hot against your face, but his grip on you doesn’t falter. He grabs your wrists, attempting to pin them above your head, but you fight back with all your strength, writhing beneath him, your legs kicking out, trying to find leverage to push him off.
“That’s enough,” he growls, his voice rough and intimidating as he finally manages to secure your wrists. “Calm do–”
You turn your head and bite the arm that’s pinning your wrist down, canines piercing the skin. 
“Fuck,” Marc hisses through clenched teeth, his thrusts becoming rougher, more desperate, as if he’s trying to match your intensity, trying to make you feel the same pain you’re inflicting on him. The bed creaks with the force of your combined movements, the air thick with the sounds of your mutual anguish.
“You wanna  hurt me, baby?” he pants as he lets go of your wrist and instead grabs your chin to force you to look at him. 
“Yeah,” you whisper without hesitation, your pupils dilated, your voice dripping with venom and need.
Marc’s eyes darken with a mix of lust and something deeper, something almost like understanding. “Good,” he says simply, grabbing your ass and rolling you both over, so you can ride him. He pulls up the pillow behind his back, so he’s propped up and you can hold onto his shoulders. “Take what you need.”
He moves his hips slowly, tenderly almost, as if to tell you he’s done fighting with you and wants you to feel good. You’re not there yet, you’re still seeing red. Clawing at his chest, nails digging into his skin, leaving scratches that will take days to fade.
But it’s not enough. You need more. You need to make him feel the pain he’s caused, to make him understand what he’s put you through. You push his face away, his stubble grazing your palm, and he turns his head, biting down on your thumb, groaning at the taste of you. Spurred on by the sensation, your teeth find his shoulder, biting down hard enough to break the skin.
“Stop,” he grunts, the word strained, his cock twitching inside you. You don’t relent immediately, your teeth sinking deeper until he grabs your shoulders, trying to push you off.
Finally, he manages to grip your throat, not squeezing, but enough to make you stop. The pressure is firm, commanding, and it stills your movements. He looks up at you, his eyes filled with a mixture of desire and desperation. “Enough,” he says with finality, his voice rough and low. “I want you to fuck me, not kill me.”
You stare down at him, your chest heaving, the raw emotion in his eyes grounding you. Slowly, you release your grip on his shoulders, the tension in your body easing as you adjust to the new position. His hand remains on your throat, a reminder of his control, but also of the thin line between pain and pleasure that you both walk.
You start to move, rocking your hips against him, swollen clit rubbing against his trimmed pubes, taking him deep inside you. His grip on your throat tightens just a fraction, enough to send a thrill through your body, but not enough to hurt. His other hand grips your hip, guiding your movements as you ride him, each thrust a release of the pent-up emotions that have been tearing you apart.
Mouth slightly agape, Marc’s eyes never leave yours, the connection between you intense and unbreakable. “That’s it, baby,” he murmurs. “Use me.”
And you do. 
Your movements become increasingly more frantic, muscles tense, driven by a need to feel him, to feel that he’s really here with you.
“You left,” you pant, eyes piercing his, pleasure building inside you with every movement of your hips.
“Yeah, I did,” Marc replies, his tone unapologetic and infuriatingly calm. He lets go of your neck and cups your cheek instead, his thumb absentmindedly brushing over your cheekbone.
“I–I thought you were dead,” you choke out, tears stinging your eyes as you find the perfect pace, hands resting on his pecs. The pressure in your core builds, each thrust bringing you closer to the edge.
“You fucking asshole, I thought you were dead!” Your voice cracks as the hurt and anger that have been festering inside you pour out, mingling with the unbearable pleasure he’s giving you. 
“I’m not dead, baby. I’m right here.” His voice is softer now, tinged with an edge of remorse. He accentuates his words with a powerful thrust of his hips, driving deep inside you. The sensation forces a moan from your lips, your anger momentarily drowned out.
The tears you’ve been holding back finally spill over, trailing down your cheeks as you ride him harder, your body seeking solace in the physical connection. You lean forward, your forehead resting against his, your breaths mingling, your eyes closed.
“I hate you,” you whisper. “I fucking hate you, Marc.”
His response is immediate, his hands gripping your hips with bruising force as he drives into you with renewed vigor. “I know, baby,” he pants. “I know you do.”
His words, combined with the relentless rhythm of his thrusts, push you closer to the brink. You hold onto his broad shoulders as your walls tightens around his cock, the muscles in your legs aching. The rush you’re experiencing is intoxicating, the line between pleasure and pain, love and hate blurring until you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins.
As the pressure builds to an unbearable peak, you cling to him, your body trembling. “I need you,” you whine, your voice barely more than a whisper. “Please, I need you.”
“I’ve got you, baby,” he murmurs, his grip on you tightening. “I’ve got you.”
The words are a promise, a plea, and as your orgasm crashes over you, you feel a moment of clarity. Despite everything, despite the pain and the anger, he’s here. He’s with you.
You collapse against him, your body trembling with aftershocks, your breath coming in shallow gasps as tears stream down your cheeks. Marc wraps his strong arms around you, holding you tight as he chases his own release, his hips moving with relentless intensity. His breath is hot against your ear, his voice both a comfort and a torment.
“Tell me you’re mine,” he pants, too far gone to stop himself. 
You’re lost in the moment, too out of it to hear him.
“Tell me,” he urges again, needing to hear you say it.
When you still don’t respond and he feels he can’t hold back any longer, he pulls your head back by the nape of your neck.
You look like you’re somewhere else entirely, flying high, eyes glassy.
“Hey,” he says sharply, slowing his thrusts down as much as he can physically stand it, searching your face until your gaze meets his. 
“Huh?”
“Tell me you’re mine,” he repeats through gritted teeth, brow furrowed. “Please.”
His eyes are warm and you see him—the Marc who shared his favorite childhood recipe with you, the Marc who reassured you after your boss was an asshole to you, the Marc who made you laugh until your sides ached.
“I–I’m yours,” you whisper, the realization that it’s the truth breaking something inside you. “I’ve always been yours.”
Your words are like balm for his wounded soul, and he feels like he can finally let go. “Say it again.”
“I’m yours, Marc. I’m yours, I’m yours, I’m yours.”
“Fuck,” he groans, his thrusts becoming sloppy. He’s close. “I could–I could never stay away from you. Never.”
The confession slips out, raw and unfiltered, and it’s like a dagger to your heart. You bite down on his shoulder, trying to silence the sob that threatens to escape as he fucks you with everything he has.
“Gonna come, baby,” he pants. “Where do you want me?”
You feel like your body doesn’t belong to you, your mind foggy. But you know exactly where you want him, where you need him. 
“Inside.”
He shouldn’t. He knows he shouldn’t.
But he’s here to give you everything he can. And he does, spilling his warm cum deep inside of you, his cock pulsing, hips stuttering as he groans your name. 
Not baby. 
Not Sunshine. 
Your name.
He wraps his arms around you, softly, almost reverently, feeling your bare, sweat-covered skin against his palms. He holds you close like this for a moment before rolling you both over so he’s on top of you again, his cock still buried inside, his body slumping against yours.
Feeling his weight on you is grounding, soothing, calming you like nothing else in the world ever can. You try to absorb the feeling of his heartbeat against yours, knowing this moment of closeness won’t last. Marc usually doesn’t hold you for long after he’s fucked you. 
You inhale his scent, draw shapes on his back with your fingertips, scratch his scalp softly, nudge his shoulder with your nose, press little kisses on his skin. Each touch is a silent plea for him to surprise you, to stay with you for a little bit longer.
He relaxes on top of you, the deep tension he’s been feeling for so long slowly giving way to a sense of calm. It’s peaceful, his mind quiet for once.
How he wishes he could stay like this forever; feeling your heartbeat, your soft touch, holding you close as you fall asleep, nose brushing the nape of your neck, a protective arm draped over you, keeping you safe. 
He’s convincing himself to stay. He can feel it. 
Just this once. 
To put a smile on your pretty face.
To show you he cares. 
It means so much to you, and how could he–
“I love you, Marc,” you whisper against his skin.
The words slip out before you can stop them, and you immediately regret saying them as you feel his muscles tense and he pulls out of you, leaving you painfully empty. His cum starts leaking out of you, pooling on the rumpled sheets beneath you. 
Marc sits on the edge of the bed with his back turned to you and you sit up, leaning against the headboard, watching his profile with tearful eyes.
“Marc,” you say quietly, extending your hand to lightly touch his arm.
But it’s too late. 
The spell is broken. 
He gets up and fishes out a pack of cigarettes and his lighter from his jeans pocket, lighting one up, the orange glow casting shadows on the wall. He blows out a stream of smoke as he pulls up his jeans, sitting back on the bed, eyes distant as he looks out of the window.
You feel a pang of hurt, but you press on, desperately needing him to understand. “You–you don’t have to love me too,” you whisper, your voice cracking. “But please, you’ve been gone for so long and I–I only just got you back. Please, just stay with me this one time. Just this one time.”
He turns his head to look at you, his eyes flickering with something you can’t quite place. You shake your head slowly, resigned, then reach for his cigarette. 
He gives it to you, watching as you put it between your swollen lips. You take a long drag, the smoke filling your lungs, and then exhale slowly, closing your eyes for a moment. 
Marc eyes you curiously, recalling how you proudly told him you’d stopped smoking the last time he saw you.  
Some things have changed, he supposes.
And some things…haven’t.
“Where were you?” you ask. 
“Egypt,” he replies simply, caressing your leg.
“The whole time?”
“The whole time.”
“And the…business you had there, is it done?”
He hesitates for a moment before nodding, an imperceptible smile on his lips. “Yeah. You could say that.”
You take another drag from the cigarette before passing it back to him, the smoke a comforting distraction. “Will you stay in town now?”
Marc looks at you, and for a moment, hope flares in your chest. “Mhm. That’s the plan.”
You reach out and trace the remnants of what you can only imagine was a nasty bruise below his ribcage. “Aren’t you tired of this?”
He chuckles. “Of course I am.”
“Then why the fuck don’t you stop?”
He sighs. “It’s not that easy. There’s people who count on me, who need me.”
You avert your gaze, laughing mirthlessly, quickly wiping away a tear with trembling fingers. Marc watches you intently as he smokes, his hand resting on your thigh. 
“I see,” you say softly as you meet his gaze, a sad smile on your lips. “Nothing’s changed.”
He doesn’t say anything in return.
“Why did you come back?”
I wanted to be as close to you as possible. 
“My…job required me to. And I think it’ll stay that way for the foreseeable future.”
You nod. “Okay.”
He gently strokes your leg, unconsciously trying to soothe himself more than you. He’s about to say something, he doesn’t even know what, just something, when you can’t hold it in anymore.
“I get that I’m not a priority for you, Marc, I really do,” you whisper, your expression so full of sadness he can barely stand to look at you. “You made that abundantly clear when you disappeared without having the decency to say goodbye–”
“Sunshine…”
“–but I don’t understand why you won’t do this one thing for me.”
Marc’s brow furrows deeply as he watches your lip quiver with frustration.
“I-I promise I won’t ever ask you again, but please stay with me tonight. Please. It doesn’t even have to be the whole night. Just an hour, Marc, or–or half an–”
“Sunshine, no,” he says a bit sharper than intended, his own nerves frayed. He gets up and looks at the moon.
You just…don’t understand.
You don’t understand what keeps him up at night, what keeps him away from you, what he’s vowed to protect you from—and he can never tell you. 
He knows he should have left you alone when he saw you outside the bar that night, should have walked away and spared you the pain. 
But he couldn’t do it then, and he can’t do it now.
Because he’s a selfish asshole.
Because he loves you.
He flicks the cigarette butt out of the window, then bends down to put on his shirt, the act mechanical, his face set in a mask of determination. You haven’t noticed before, but now you notice how careful he is when bending and stretching. 
He must be in pain.
“Marc,” you plead, your heart beating so fast you feel like it’s going to explode.
He puts on his shoes, the silence that’s stretching between you suffocating. He’s killing you. He’s killing you, and yet you’re more afraid of losing him forever.
This needs to stop. You need to stop.
“If you walk out of that door, I don’t ever wanna see you again.” 
Marc halts his movements and your pleading eyes search his, the genuine desperation in them twisting a knife in his heart. For a moment, you think you see something in his eyes—a flicker of the man you need him to be—but then it’s gone.
He sighs heavily, then rounds the bed, leaning in to cup your cheek. “You don’t mean that,” he murmurs, pressing a soft, lingering kiss against your forehead. “I’ll see you around.”
“Please,” you whisper, but it’s too late.
When he reaches the front door, his cap in hand, you stand in the living room, naked and vulnerable. “I hate you, Marc Spector,” you say, your voice filled with all the pain and anger you feel.
He turns, his eyes softening for just a moment. “No, Sunshine. No, you don’t.”
And with that, he’s gone. 
It takes a few seconds for your body to react to what just happened, and when it does, it’s overwhelming. Your stomach sinks, your chest tightens, and your vision blurs as you grapple with your ambivalent feelings.  
Tears spill down your cheeks as you crumble, the exhaustion and heartbreak taking over.
Heading back to your bedroom, your eyes catch the roses your boyfriend gave you yesterday, a cruel reminder of the life you’ve been trying to build without Marc. All the work you put in, down the drain.
And for what? Why do you do this to yourself?
In a fit of anger and despair, you grab the flowers and throw them off your balcony. You watch as they scatter on the rain-wet street below, the cool night air wrapping around your naked body like a cloak. You stay for a moment, heart pounding, staring at the flowers as Marc’s cum runs down your thigh.
God, you’re a dumb idiot.  
You turn off the TV as you head back inside, turn off your bedside lamp, the darkness a welcome solace. You go to the bathroom without turning the light on, clean up, put on a fresh pair of pajamas. 
You do hate him.
You need to tell yourself that, for tonight at least.
Curled up in your bed, you clutch at the pillow where his scent still lingers, letting the darkness take you as the man who holds your heart is once again slipping through your fingers. The tears come again, silent and unending, each one a testament to the love you can’t seem to let go of, no matter how much it hurts.
Because for better or worse, Marc’s a part of you, and you can’t escape it.
Down on the street, Marc watches the scene unfold from the shadows, the flowers landing at his feet. He stands there, drenched in regret, his heart heavy. He wants to turn back, to hold you and tell you everything will be okay, but he knows he can’t.
Not with the life he leads.
Not until he’s finally free. 
He walks to his car, parked on the opposite side of the street. Coming from the reflection of the driver’s window, the car illuminated by the street lamp above, he hears a familiar voice. 
“You’re a cold bastard, Marc,” the man in the reflection says, his tone filled with quiet condemnation.
“Thanks, bud,” Marc sighs, running a hand through his hair. “You wanna explain to him that we’re gonna be late, then?” He raises an eyebrow, but Steven just shakes his head disapprovingly.
Marc scoffs, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Didn’t think so.” 
He takes the silver lighter out of his pocket, lights a cigarette, and leans against the car door, looking up at your windows. He imagines your silhouette as you’re lying on your side, your soft skin, the gentle rise and fall of your chest. He imagines you’re dreaming of him, finding peace in your sleep.
He knows he’s dreaming himself, knows you’re tossing and turning, cursing him. And he deserves it. He knows he does. 
“Tick-tock, Marc Spector,” comes the resonating voice of Khonshu, his towering figure perched atop a nearby rooftop, his skeletal bird skull gleaming in the moonlight. 
Marc rolls his eyes, takes a last drag of his cigarette before putting it out with his shoe, and shoots the impatient god a glare that earns him a chuckle that echoes through the night. 
He looks up at your windows one last time, his heart aching with a longing he can’t afford to indulge. Then, with a heavy sigh, he gets into his car and turns on the radio.
As he speeds down the road, the city lights blurring past, leaving you behind, he feels the crushing loneliness of his life.
It’s strange. 
Feeling lonely despite never being, you know, alone. 
Right on cue, he catches the intense gaze of a dark pair of eyes in the rearview mirror. 
“What? You gonna tell me I’m a cold bastard, too?”
Jake looks back at him with a sly grin. “Nah. You don’t need me to tell you what you already know,” he scoffs. “But it’s a real shame, Marc. Leaving that poor girl to get fucked by boys who don’t know what they’re doing, just ‘cause you don’t have the balls to–” 
“And that’s enough of you,” Marc mutters, turning up the volume of the radio, refocusing on the way ahead.
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⚡ Kavinsky’s Odd Look is playing in Marc’s car as he’s driving through the night, thinking of you. ⚡ Marc’s Ferrari Testarossa – the sexiest car there is. ⚡ I adore the synthwave aesthetic if you can’t tell lol.
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Moon Knight Masterlist | AO3
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scarletttries · 1 year ago
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NSFW Headcanon Request: Steven Grant (Moon Knight)
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Steven Grant + Recording: (prompt list here)
(Part Two Here!!)
- When Steven Grant bought a little camcorder and stand a few years ago, he had very innocent reasons in mind. Yes, the stand was set up so the camera pointed straight at his bed, but it was to capture exactly why we woke up so exhausted from a night of tossing and turning alone, not for anything more fun than that.
- Naturally anytime you were coming over, he'd carefully stash the device away, not wanting to creep you out or do anything to risk making the most important person in his life uncomfortable. He knows just how lucky he is to be the man that gets to worship your body, and even though he'd die for the chance to relive every one of your intimate encounters, he thinks it's way too weird of a question to ask.
- That is until one night you surprise him at home, on your way back from a girl's night and missing your sweet, nerdy boyfriend. He's over the moon when he opens the door to your bright, smiling face, quickly surrendering to your hypnotic kiss as you lead him to the bed he was all but ready to settle into for the night alone.
- Your hands are pushing his shirt off his shoulders, while his hands slide up your dress, clawing at your thighs until they spread enough for him to fit between them, when you first notice the blinking red light.
"Steven, gorgeous, how long have you had a camera in your bedroom?" Instantly he's mortified, apologising and tripping over his own feet as he launches off the bed, practically crawling across his bedroom floor to turn off the device,
"I'm so sorry love, I didn't realise you were coming, and it's to help with my sleep walking, and I swear I always put it away whenever you're here, I'd never violate your privacy like that." He's struggling to take in breaths as each sentence catches in his throat, tears prickling the corners of his eyes as he watches you pull down your skirt and hop off the edge of his bed, picking him up off the floor and bringing your hands to softly cup his face.
"It's okay, I believe you. I trust you Steven, I was just surprised is all." Your gentle words slow his heart back to a steady pace, the tender press of your lips to his enough to reassure him that this isn't the breaking point he always assumes is right around the corner. Each kiss is quickly followed by another, Steven completely entranced by you, enough so that he doesn't notice as you press the record button again, throwing the camera a showy wink as you lead him back to bed again.
- It's not until a few days later, texting Steven from a hotel during a weekend away that you let him know about your little tape. He's desperately fighting the urge to plead over text for you to come home early, settling for telling you just how terribly he misses you, three little words hanging on the tip of his tongue, not quite bold enough to let them loose yet. You echo his longing sentiment, telling him just how much you miss the feel of his hands on your skin, his touch on every part of you, and tell him maybe he should check his camera before he takes himself to bed.
- He's sceptical as he takes his camcorder off his stand, flipping the little screen to face him and scrolling through the hours of footage until he recognises the night he last had you over. He has to cover his eyes with embarrassment as he watches himself tumble out of bed to stop the recording, but his eyes dart wide open when he watches you turn it straight back on, the playful look in your eye immediately flushing all his blood down his body.
- He realises he's holding his breath in his attempt to hear every single sound you make as the two of you step across the screen and climb back on to the bed he's now propped up in alone. He knows it was your decision, but he still feels voyeuristic and dirty as he watches your dress slide down your body on the screen, his free hand slipping into his pyjama bottoms as his on screen counterpart slides his hands over your chest, earning a happy moan that has him hardening at the first touch.
- His mouth hangs open and he watches intently as he settles between your legs, turning up the volume as high as he can as you start to pant and moan at the feel of his tongue exploring your centre. His hand has picked up its pace now, chest heaving as he watches your back arch off the bed, nipples hard in the cold night air.
- He almost loses it the first time he notices you smile right into the camera as you moan out his name, a private performance just for him that makes his heart throb almost as hard as the manhood he's now furiously rubbing. He can feel him cross the point of no return as he watched himself plunge deep inside you, your legs wrapping tightly around his hips leaving no room between your two bodies, his lips desperately chasing yours. His screen self lasts longer than lonely Steven does, spilling across the empty bed as you let out the needy high pitched whine you do every time he pulls out of you to change positions. He sits there, dick pulsing in his hand as he watches your ass bounce as he slams his hips against yours, finally both spent and collapsing alongside you.
- Feeling utterly beat he almost puts the camera away, until he notices you creep out of the bed towards the bathroom, stopping in front of the focused lens to mouth three little words to him before stopping the video. If the sensitive soul hadn't already been in bed, he would have immediately collapsed to the floor. Frantically he picks his phone back up, impatiently waiting through the rings until he can finally tell you that he loves you too.
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valleyof-goldenlilies · 1 year ago
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The Woes of Betrothals (Aemond Targaryen x Reader)
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Part 2 about the wedding is out now! Read it here 
Synopsis: Recently betrothed, Prince Aemond is unsure on the virtues befitting that of a good husband. Ser Criston offers some surprisingly useful insight. 
Warnings: nothing explicit, just Aemond being emotionally constipated 
Word Count: 3k words. this was supposed to be a short one shot 😭
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the House of The Dragon/Fire and Blood characters, save for Y/N. All credit for the characters goes to George RR Martin and the showrunners of HOTD. The GIF above is also not mine, original credit to the creator is stated above. Go check them out! 
A/N: In a fluff writing mood recently, so expect to see more fluffs coming your way (not just for aemond :)) 💗
lovely dividers once again credited to @firefly-graphics​ !
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Heavy grunts and the clashing sound of steel on steel resonated through the training yard of the Red Keep. Surrounded by a crowd of onlookers, Prince Aemond, his forehead beaded with sweat, moved deftly to dodge a blow struck by Ser Criston Cole’s morningstar. 
It was nearly noon, and the Prince and Kingsguard had been training since the break of dawn. Ser Criston had a look of exhaustion on his face, the midday sun clearly taking a toll on him, but Prince Aemond continued sparring with a fierce determination, parrying Criston’s offensives with utmost precision or viciously swinging his sword to land a blow on the knight. 
Whilst the prince was fond of training for long hours, Ser Criston was familiar enough with Prince Aemond’s various moods to know that today, while he was there in person, he was not in spirit. Seeing a chance, Criston quickly moved to swing a blow at Prince Aemond, and succeeded in catching him off guard, knocking the sword from the Prince’s hand for the first time this morning. 
Criston expected the prince to get angry that he had been bested, but Aemond merely raised a brow and rolled his eye, “I yield. Let us cease training for this morning.” Applause broke out through the training yard, and Criston had to hide a grin. It had been a while since he managed to beat Aemond in training. 
As the crowd dispersed, Criston noticed Aemond polishing his sword at a corner, a brooding look on his face. Feeling particularly emboldened this morning at his victory, Criston walked towards the prince, setting down his morningstar as he questioned, “What troubles you, my prince?” 
“I haven’t the slightest idea what you are insinuating, Cole,” came Aemond’s curt response, but Criston was undeterred. “You may pretend all is well, but you have been on edge for a few days now, aye?” Criston commented, observing how the prince’s jaw was clenched. Oddly enough, he noticed doubt shining in the prince’s lone violet eye., catching Criston off guard “You may have been sparring with me this morning, but your heart is elsewhere. Tell me what troubles you, my prince.” 
Criston expected the prince to scowl and tell him it was none of his business, but instead, Aemond let out a pensive sigh, before tentatively asking, “Ser Criston, how do you reckon one should please their betrothed?” 
Criston’s ears immediately stood up in attention. Gods be good, the One-Eyed Prince was asking him for advice? And about his betrothed no less. As a Kingsguard, Criston had to suppress a laugh at the irony. “Are you referring to the Lady Y/N Y/L/N, my prince?” 
“Well, it could hardly be anyone else, could it?” Aemond retorted, though his heart was not in it. Criston watched, amused, as Aemond hummed contemplatively, “As you know, she and I were betrothed less than a moon’s turn ago. I had not crossed paths with her often before that, but…” Aemond swallowed, thinking of how brilliantly she smiled at him every time he had the fortune of being graced with her presence. He had always knew that his marriage would be one of duty and political benefit to his house, but over the course of getting to know the lady over the past few weeks, he found her company pleasant, and her gentle charm and surprisingly humorous wit a welcome change in the usual dreadfully boring courtiers at the Red Keep. And with every passing moment he spent in her presence, he felt a small sliver of affection for her begin to blossom in his heart. “As I got to know her more, I soon began to wish to be the sole cause of her brilliant smiles, her beautiful laughter, and selfishly, the sole receiver of her love and affection.”
Aemond had to resist the urge to bury his face in his hands. He was sounding like a lovesick fool, in front of Cole, of all people. Gods, he was an idiot, an utter idiot. Swords he could swing and books he could read, but when it came to affection, he found himself no better than an ignorant babe. “It sounds as though you harbour a great affection for the lady Y/L/N,” Criston smiled. “Yes,” Aemond said softly, his voice tinged a little with despair. “But I am unsure on how to best express my affections. She is akin to an ethereal maiden, and I’m naught but a crippled prince, who is stumped in my duties as a husband. I cannot seem to muster up the courage to proclaim my love for her, or shower her with praises and compliments.” 
‘Gods, what if she is unhappy with my performance of my duties as her husband because I am too much of a coward to even talk to her about my feelings?’ Aemond thought in alarm, mind racing. He did not want to be the reason why those lovely smiles of hers cease to exist. He wanted to make her feel like the most blissful woman in the realm. But he was completely clueless as to how. Words seemed completely inadequate to express the depth of his affection for her, and he had never been the best with his words anyway. 
Just then, Aemond felt a hand on his shoulder, grounding him to reality once more “Breathe, my prince,” Criston’s steady voice calmed Aemond down, making his racing thoughts come to a screeching halt. “I do believe you are overthinking things, my prince. Contrary to popular belief, I think that affection need not be expressed in elaborate gestures or through fervent declarations of love all the time.” 
Aemond’s eyebrows shot up, “Then how will she know how much I appreciate her? I can barely converse with her without looking like a stuttering fool.” Criston smiled, a sort of fatherly affection filling his eyes as he glanced down at the prince. “Though I am lacking in experience in matters of the heart, I believe that affection isn’t always just about grand gestures. Words are not the only outlet to express your admiration of her, my prince. You can start with the little actions: spending time with her, bringing her flowers, talking more with her about her interests, that sort of thing.” “And you think that that would be sufficient?”Aemond was a little sceptical. 
“Of course, that would not suffice in the long run. You are to be married, my prince, you will spend countless years with each other, you will have to do more than that.” Aemond’s face turned crestfallen, causing Criston to pat his shoulder, “However, given your trouble in expressing your feelings, these small gestures are a start. Build up from there, and you’ll find it easier to demonstrate your love for her over time.” Aemond’s gaze was still pensive, but his eye was sparkling a little with hope. “But what if I’m at a loss of words every time I’m with her? Won’t she find my company dreadfully dull then?” Criston couldn’t help the laugh that erupted from him, though Aemond looked faintly offended at that. “Sometimes, your company is good enough, your Grace. Not all your time spent together need be filled with meaningful conversations. Basking in each other’s presence is bliss enough.” 
Satisfied with Criston’s response, Aemond stood up with a decisive look. “I am grateful for your advice, Cole. I shall depart to implement your advice at once.” Before leaving, however, Aemond tilted his head and smirked slightly, “You are rather good at giving romantic advice for a knight, Ser Criston. Your wisdom is wasted on being a Kingsguard.” 
Criston barked a laugh, thinking of that someone from so long ago. “Mayhaps, your grace. But I think I am rather content imparting my knowledge to you for now.” Aemond said nothing at that, only raising a hand in farewell as he strode off. Criston watched him depart, a slight grin on his face. ‘The Queen would be delighted to hear of this,’ he thought to himself with a degree of satisfaction. 
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You were sitting in Princess Helaena’s apartments, forehead furrowed in concentration as you delicately weaved a needle through the handkerchief you were embroidering for your betrothed. The midday sun shone through the long windows, casting a light golden glow throughout Helaena’s chambers. 
“Here, what do you think of this?” Helaena leaned over to you, eyes shining with anticipation as you held up your work so far. “It’s beautiful,” Helaena complimented, “Is that a raven?” You nodded, tilting your head to inspect your work. “Do you think it is too unusual to embroider on a handkerchief?” Helaena laughed, “You should not be asking me. Given the fact that-” she held up her own embroidery, and you laughed when you caught sight of a large beetle on her handkerchief. 
“I have to ask, however, why a raven?” Helaena inquired. You bit your lip softly, remembering your last interaction with your betrothed, Aemond. Knowing your love for birds, Aemond had taken you to Grand Maester Orwyle’s rookery, to see the various birds he had fostered there. You had both taken a liking to the ravens, with their intelligent eyes and strangely silent demeanour, compared to the other noisier birds in the rookery. You thought to yourself that they reminded you much of Aemond, though you did not say it out loud, watching with fond eyes as Aemond fed a raven and stroked its feathers, with a gentleness you did not know he possessed. 
“Your brother seems to like them,” you answered, smiling. Helaena beamed, “I’m sure he would be pleased with your gift.” “I do hope so,” your voice trailed off hesitantly, causing Helaena to take your free hand and squeeze it lightly. You had been much enamoured with your betrothed ever since your arrival to King’s Landing several moon turns ago, and you have come to know and appreciate him for his silent, thoughtful aura. However, his comportment did spell some uncertainty in you. While you knew this was a political match, your heart couldn’t help but yearn that your future husband would love you as much as you did him. 
But it was nigh impossible to tell what the One-Eyed Prince was thinking whenever we spent time together. He seemed perfectly cordial to you…but you wished you could get a further glimpse into what he felt for you. Did he feel at least a fraction of the adoration you felt for him? Or were you doomed to spend a lifetime in a courteous, yet dispassionate and loveless marriage with a man you long admired? 
Your thoughts were cut off by a sudden knock on the door. Startled, you nearly dropped your embroidery, but Helaena caught it deftly just in time. Sheepishly murmuring your thanks, you watched as a serving girl came into the room and curtsied in front of the both of you. “Your Grace, my lady, Prince Aemond is requesting to see you.” 
Aemond? Your heart began pounding furiously, delight and anticipation filling you. Was he here to see you? You tried tamping down your excitement, thinking firmly to yourself that he could be equally as likely to be here for Helaena. “Did he say which of the two of us he wanted to see?” “He wished to see Lady Y/N, your Grace.”
Your heart was beating so fast it felt dangerously close to exploding. Your mind was spinning in a dizzying rush of emotions. Helaena dismissed the serving girl, and smiled at you, “Well, I should not keep my brother waiting any longer for his betrothed. Go.” 
“Thank you, your Grace. Will I see you at dinner with the Queen tonight?” “Of course. You must tell me everything that happens,” Helaena’s eyes twinkled merrily. “That is a given,” you stood up and curtsied, before exiting the room, clutching the handkerchief you just sewed like it was the last thing grounding you to reality. Your steps were light and airy, and your heart nearly stopped when you saw Aemond standing by a window, his back to you, looking as majestic as ever in his training gear and his long silver hair flowing down his back. Your betrothed. 
“My Prince,” a sweet voice broke through Aemond’s thoughts. He turned around, his eye widening as he beheld his fair lady. She was dressed beautifully as always, in a light pink gown with a square neckline and elbow length sleeves. Pearl earrings dangled from her earlobes, serving only to accentuate her lovely complexion. He strode to her as she curtsied, his hand reaching out to her shoulder. 
“At ease,” Aemond’s voice was like velvet. “You are my betrothed, there is no need for such formalities.” You nodded shyly, meeting Aemond’s eye, surprised that today, there was actually a flicker of emotion behind it. Noticing how he shifted his weight nervously from foot to foot, your eyes widened slightly as you realised that Aemond Targaryen, the usually composed and unflinching prince, was nervous. And it was because of you. 
Aemond cleared his throat, finally revealing what he had been hiding behind his back. Just when you thought the day’s events could not get any stranger than seeing Aemond being anxious, you were caught even more off guard when you spotted an assortment of pink, blue and orange blooms in his hand. 
“These are for you, my lady,” he added, eye darting over her face to drink in all her beautiful features and most importantly, her reaction to his attempt at expressing his adoration for her. He was immensely relieved to find nothing but genuine delight on his betrothed’s face. 
“Oh, they’re wonderful,” you exclaimed happily, a flush going to your cheeks. “You are too kind, my prince. Thank you, I love them.” Aemond watched tenderly as she took the flowers and held them to her nose. She was simply angelic. 
You inhaled the sweet scent of the flowers, feeling your heart flutter at his sudden, but welcome gesture of affection. Perhaps this was a sign he returned your feelings? 
Aemond took a deep breath, trying to recall all the advice Criston had told him in the training yard just now. He had stopped by the garden to pick out the prettiest wildflowers he could find, but he found that none could compare to the sheer radiance of his betrothed when she smiled. ‘Focus’, Aemond told himself sternly, trying to collect his thoughts. ‘This was about making her see how much I care for her, not waxing on and on internally about how utterly struck I am by her beauty. I cannot mess this up.’ 
‘I must make her see how she has come to become the sun in my life.’ 
But Aemond was cut off by your sudden ‘Oh!’ Aemond nearly jumped out of his skin, afraid that there was something wrong with the flowers. But he was puzzled when you extended a handkerchief to him, smiling brightly. “I embroidered this for you. Take this as a token of gratitude for the flowers.” Aemond turned over the handkerchief delicately, tracing over the raven and various flowers sewed at the corner of the handkerchief, along with his initials, ‘A.T’ He felt his breath catch in his throat, “This…this is…” 
You watched him nervously as he stammered before falling into silence. Did he not like it? Perhaps he thought the raven was too much? You gripped the flowers in your hand a little tighter, saying a prayer to the Seven in your mind. 
Your worries were immediately allayed when Aemond pressed a shaky kiss onto your forehead. Startled, yet utterly enchanted, you stared up at him, who looked almost as shocked as you were at the kiss. “I…I take it you like your gift then?” you asked softly. 
He let out a quiet chuckle, “I think ‘like’ is an understatement, my lady. It is the most thoughtful gift anyone has ever given to me. I shall cherish it forever. As I will with you.” 
Aemond nearly screamed when he realised he blurted out the last part. ‘Why did I say that, why did I say that, why did I say that!’ his mind flooded with panic. However, suddenly emboldened from the adrenaline of the moment, he finally found the courage to express what he had been feeling for his fair lady. “My lady, I would like to confess something, and I think there couldn’t be a more appropriate time than this. I am hopelessly besotted with you.” He watched her eyes widen to the size of dinner plates, and he hurried to add, “Tis alright if you do not return those feelings! I understand, believe me. I do not wish to force you to do anything you are uncomfortable with. But it’s just that I loved you for so long, and I had no idea how to tell you, and I fear if I let this moment slip I will never muster up the bravery to tell you again and gods I-” the energy suddenly drained out of him as he found himself once again, at a loss of words. “I just…adore you beyond belief. Beyond what I can fathom. Please ignore my ramblings if you are uncomfortable with them, just take them as the words of a lovesick fool.” He averted her eyes, embarrassment and sadness filling him. How could he hope for someone as good and wonderful as her to love such a beast as him? The Gods should strike him down for his pride. 
A warm hand reached for Aemond’s, interlacing her fingers with his. Aemond looked up in disbelief at your next words, “You have no idea how thankful I am to hear those words…because I feel the same.” You smiled shyly at him, “I was hoping you had the same sentiments as I did, and now that you professed your feelings, I could not be happier.” 
Aemond reached out to grip her hand with both of his, cradling her soft hand in his hands, staring deep into her eyes, sparkling with so much devotion and adoration. They stood in silence for a while, before Aemond pulled her hand gently to his lips and planted a reverent kiss to her knuckles. 
“Would you…perhaps care to take a stroll with me, my lady? I believe we have a lot to discuss.” 
“I would love nothing more, your Grace.” 
let me know if you wish to be added to a taglist for general aemond works! if you enjoyed this fic, comments and reblogs are highly appreciated :) thank you for reading! 
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moonknightsonata · 10 months ago
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Book Dilemna
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pairing: Marc Spector x reader, Steven Grant x reader
summary: You’re moving in with the boys, and Marc greatly underestimated how many books you were bringing into their already full of books apartment.
cw: What’s a little bickering between lovers, Marc suggests something blasphemous about books several times. Mostly fluff.
wc: 1413
a/n: Is this a little anecdotal of when I moved in with my boyfriend and he thought I had too many books? Yes. I can only imagine how many books Steven and I could have if we combined our libraries and we would both be in heaven but Marc hates it.
Here’s something a little sweet while I work on something heartbreaking with Marc.
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Marc thought Steven had a lot of books. He had naively assumed Steven had the biggest personal collection of books that someone could have in one apartment, and that only libraries or bookstores would have more than him.
That thought left his brain immediately when he was lugging up the tenth box of books from the moving van into his - now shared with you - apartment.
He unceremoniously dropped the box on the table and rolled his shoulders as he gave you an unimpressed look. “Please tell me that was the last box of books.”
You looked at him from the kitchen where you were unpacking your favorite mugs into the cabinets. “Um… how many have you brought up?”
“I think that was ten.”
The grimace on your face let Marc know it was not, in fact, the last box of books. How many books could you even have? Marc wondered if you had even read them all, or if you hoarded them like a dragon. He groaned as he sat at the dining table, leaning his head back on the rest of the chair. “How many more?”
You gave a little shrug, apologizing. “Maybe a few more?”
Marc’s eyebrows furrowed as he looked at you suspiciously. “A few, like 3 more or a few like another 10?”
“… 5? I’m not sure honestly…. I didn’t keep track when I packed them up!” You defended yourself, putting the last mug away. You made your way towards the door, slipping shoes on. “I’ll go get the rest of them, you sit for a few minutes, you’ve been going up and down for the past hour and a half.” You really did feel bad, Marc was being such a trooper after all, lugging your stuff from the van.
Marc shook his head, already standing up and wrapping his arms around you to stop you from going downstairs to get the boxes. “No, no, I can do it. C’mon, I was Moon Knight - I’ve dealt with ancient Egyptian gods, you think I can’t handle boxes of books?” he teased.
“You’re the one complaining -“ You started, before Marc interrupted you with a kiss. As he pulled away with a grin on his face, you rolled your eyes. He started it.
“Where do you and Steven plan on putting all these books, huh? Steven’s books already have most of the real estate in here.” Marc gestured to the stacks of unorganized books that already claimed every available surface of the apartment sans the kitchen counters and dining table.
“We just have to organize them a bit, we’ll fit them!” Marc raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms with an incredulous look on his face. Your confidence wavered a bit under his look and as you took in the inventory of just how many books were around you. But really, you were sure that with a bit of organizing you could fit them all.
“Maybe you’ll have to get rid of some -“ Marc started before he heard two interruptions.
Are you out of your mind? Steven.
“Are you out of your mind?” and you.
If it wasn’t so annoying how you had both screeched at the mere suggestion of losing a couple of books, Marc would’ve found it hilarious that the two of you had been so in sync. He raised his hands in mock surrender, he at least knew when he’d lose a battle. “Okay, okay, forget I said it. Geez, you and Steven hated that idea.”
You smiled triumphantly, both for getting your way of keeping all of your books, and the fact that at least one of your boyfriends understood. Two against one worked in favor, after all. “Good. At least one of you has some sense! Getting rid of books… unbelievable!”
She’s right, Marc. Getting rid of books, that’s just mental. Steven agreed with you, and Marc could see him shaking his head from the corner of his eye in the mirror hanging nearby.
“At what point do you two have too many books?”
There’s no such thing as too many books!
“There’s no such thing as too many books!”
“You two have to stop doing that.” Marc deadpanned, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Let’s just finish getting all of them into the apartment, before we decide what to do with them. I will honestly be shocked if you and Steven can fit all of them on these shelves.” Marc said, opening the front door to go back downstairs.
You trailed behind him, at least to help finish unloading the van so that he wasn’t the only one doing the heavy lifting. “We’ll fit them all, you’ll see!”
-
You definitely were not going to fit all these books.
You and Steven had waited for the next weekend to tackle organizing and shelving both his and your collections.
The day started with the two of you bickering over the proper way to organize the books.
“Definitely by title.”
“Title? But then you could end up mixing the subjects! We should do it by subject and genre.”
“That might work for all of your history books, Steven, but what about my novels? Some are romance, some are fantasy, and some are both! What if one of my romantic fantasies get misplaced into the ‘just fantasy’ section?”
Oh my god, you two are making this so much more complicated. Just put them on the shelves!
Steven’s gaze shot over to the mirror hanging on the wall so quickly, you thought he might have gotten whiplash. “We certainly will not “just put them on the shelves”, Marc! They have to be organized.
Do it by color then.
Steven knew if you had just heard the blasphemous words that Marc just suggested, you would lose your marbles. “Absolutely not.”
“What? What’d Marc suggest?” you asked curiously.
“Organizing them by color.” Steven snorted, even adding an overdramatic touch of shuddering his shoulders. “Can you imagine, love? By color?”
You paused and Steven’s bemused expression fell. “You can’t be serious.”
”I’ve seen pictures online where people have done it, it did look kind of pretty.” You shrugged, nonchalantly. You couldn’t say you would actually humor the idea of organizing books by color, but the absolute conniption it put Steven in almost made you reconsider.
”How would you even find anything?”
“I know what color my books are! Not my fault that most of your history books are all brown and yellow.”
Steven couldn’t believe what he was hearing. His own partner, suggesting organizing books by color. If he wasn’t so in love with you (and if he didn’t think it would be a case of the pot calling the kettle) he would’ve called you mad.
After about ten more minutes of bickering, discussing how to organize the books, you and Steven had agreed that first by genre, and then by title would be the simplest way. It would most likely be the quickest way to find books when they were needed.
It took another three hours just to organize the books into stacks, spread out around the apartment and labeled with sticky notes on what genre they were (which also lead to a few more interesting debates on whether you would sort ‘general mythology’ books with his Egyptology books, or should it Steven just have a ‘mythology’ genre - or should your romance books be separated by ‘young adult’ and ‘adult’).
But by dinner time, you and Steven had managed to get many of the books onto shelves around the apartment.
You were washing the dishes after dinner, when Marc approached you from behind, wrapping his arms around your waist and kissing your neck. “I’m surprised you two got as far as you did.” Marc had honestly suspected he would come to front and find the apartment overrun with books.
You turned your head towards him, beaming with a prideful gleam that Marc could practically hear ‘I told you so’ coming. “You doubted us?”
”When I could hear you two arguing practically all day? Yes.” Marc chuckled, rolling his eyes.
You returned the eye roll and handed Marc a towel to start drying the dishes you were washing. He took it from you, diligently drying and putting the dishes away. “We weren’t arguing, we were discussing.”
”Mhm. If you say so.” Marc says, a teasing grin on his face.
“Although… I hate to say you were right about one thing.”
Marc’s face lit up and he grinned like a cheshire cat.
“Oh? Do tell.”
”We’re going to have to buy more bookshelves.”
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laenordeservedbetter · 4 months ago
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Love Me in Spite
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Words: 2k
Pairing: Alicent Hightower x Fem!Knight!Reader
Synopsis: Daemon brings you to King's Landing to assassinate your former lover.
Warnings: Reader is team black but loves Alicent, sexism, one-sided opinion on Daemon's character, foul & degrading language, reader has the catspaw dagger (the one used to cut Rhaenyra; it's not with Aegon), NO ALICOLE, Criston is not around in this one but it does follow the events of S2E01, attempted murder, thoughts of one's own death, Reader is slightly a hypocrite when it comes to her faith (her and Alicent are a match made in heaven). [Let me know if I missed any.]
not my gif. || masterlist || previous work
Alicent Hightower was going to die by your hands.
If the order had been given to you no more than a hundred and eighty moon turns ago, you would have repudiated it without vacillation. As a child, you favored death over the mere prospect of harming a hair on Alicent’s head. The thought of inflicting pain upon a good, kindhearted, and forbearing lady was not incorporated in the vows you swore to the late King Viserys, nor did it align with your moral compass, but alas, many years had passed since then. You are not the same girl as before, nor was Alicent.
She is overcome by spite, leaving no trace of the woman she once was. Her companionship with the Princess, now Queen Rhaenyra, has long since ended. A bitter rivalry stretched between them, dividing the realm along with it.
War was coming, and it would begin with the retribution for Lucerys Velaryon’s death.
“Having second thoughts, are you?” Daemon looked back on his shoulder to gaze upon you. He appeared like a poacher in his present clothing. Not a day went by where Daemon wasn’t scheming. Over the years you spent by his side, you learned that violence was his only language. The rogue prince possessed a secure remedy for every predicament he found himself in, which is referred to as murder. He was an erudite warrior, if not temperamental.
“No, my prince. I am only counting the seconds until I get off this beast.” Caraxes lets out a low whine at your joke. You laugh softly, petting his scales. “Forgive me, Caraxes. I was merely jesting.”
Daemon smiles at your bond with the dragon, but it fades swiftly. “I know how you feel about that whore of a queen, but I advise you to remember that she is the enemy. If you want to let the nostalgia of an immemorial companionship influence your actions, I might as well throw you off this beast now to save myself the trouble of bringing you to King’s Landing.”
His words brought you a feeling of displeasure. Although your relationship with Alicent has waned over the years, you wish not to refer to her in a demeaning light, whether by your mouth or another’s. “Love begets catastrophe.” You voice out instead, “I will not be so weak. Duty takes precedence over any kind of affection.”
Your rejoinder influenced Daemon to pry further. “How did that woman manage to capture your affections, anyway? Did she visit your chambers while you were mourning a loved one?”
“And how did you capture Queen Rhaenyra’s heart? By looking after her in her cradle?” You shouldn’t have replied to his provocation with one of your own, but you could not pass up the opportunity for gratifying outcomes.
Daemon seethes. “You forget yourself, knight. I could throw you off this dragon in an instant.”
“And have Queen Rhaenyra lose one of her best assets?” You raise a brow. “Didn’t think so.”
The prince grunts, not willing to concede.
The rest of the flight was done in silence. Daemon continued to feel aggrieved by your quip earlier and went out of his way to show it through his actions. Even Caraxes shied away from your touch whenever you tried to pet him, the act hurting more than you thought it would.
You arrive in the harbor during the hour of the wolf. Caraxes lands on the sandy shores of King’s Landing, the stench of the sea rapidly hitting your nostrils. You get off of the winged beast first, evaluating your surroundings.
It had been quite some time since you visited King’s Landing. A pang of melancholy washes over you as you watch your once lively city now filled with weapons against the rightful heir and her dragons. You think of the smallfolk, the ones Alicent loves so much, and you imagine their faces. In your mind, you see pyres being lit and bodies being thrown onto it. You imagine the city you love so much engulfed in flames by the dragons looming overhead.
The thought sends shivers down your spine.
War is not the outcome you desire, but it is an inevitability. You know it as well as you know Alicent’s breathing. When swords start clashing and dragons turn against one another, the city will fall apart. The greens may have spilt the first blood, but your hands would begin the war.
Daemon throws you a dark cloak, which you grasp with a soft grunt.
“What’s this for?” You question as you put on the clothing. The material felt pleasant on your skin, the cloak fitting you wonderfully, as if it was tailored exactly for you. Looking back and forth between the cloak and the rogue prince, you comprehend that that was his doing. A soft smile graced your features.
Daemon’s eyes flit from you to Caraxes once he realizes that you had been observing him. He pretends to fasten the straps on the dragon, answering, “For you to blend in.” while trying to remain impassive. Daemon grabs another cloak, trying it out on himself.
“Thank you, my prince.” You needn’t say anything more. Daemon wasn’t one for sentiments and truth be told, neither are you when it comes to him.
“There’s one more thing.”
Your interest piques at his statement. The rogue prince walks towards you, dagger in hand. Briefly, you consider the prospect of him ending your life with it. Though, why come all this way for one murder?
Perhaps it would be to threaten the greens, as if to say “No one is safe. Not even the dowager queen’s former paramour.” It would be an atrocious act, one that would send Alicent reeling. Cole would call you a traitor to the realm, advising Aegon to display your body on the streets to show what happens to traitors, despite the murder being orchestrated by someone else. Alicent would refuse, of course. She would not be able to look at your body. Otto would turn your death into an opportunity. Mayhaps he would call you an honorable warrior who was unrightfully executed, painting Rhaenyra a villain. You do not know which one of those scenarios is worse.
Daemon surprises you when he offers you the dagger. “You should use this to kill her.” That was not part of the list of all the outcomes you expected.
Taking the dagger in your hand, you analyze the carvings on the blade. You should have felt formidable upon touching the weapon. It belonged to Aegon the Conqueror, after all. However, at present, the only thing you understand is that the dagger would be utilized for assassinating Alicent. Strange how a small object could have the capability to end a human’s life.
You could not respond, hiding the dagger in your sleeve. The weight of the act you were about to commit began to settle on your shoulders. Hundreds of enemies you have slain, but were you truly prepared to have Alicent be part of that list?
“Do this for your queen.” Daemon’s order was whispered, but vehement.
“For the queen.” You repeat with a shake of your head. Although you were less than solicitous to harm Alicent, you were eager to prove yourself to Rhaenyra. She deserved to be on the iron throne. ‘Twas her birthright, proclaimed by the late King Viserys. You swore an oath to protect and serve the rightful ruler of the realm, and you vowed to uphold that until the end of your days.
This is for the greater good, you tell yourself. One step closer to Rhaenyra being put on the throne.
But why doesn’t it feel right?
You get into the castle with no challenge. For a fortress occupied by Targaryen royalty, the security was subpar. And where was the commander of the Kingsguard? Surely, he needed to safeguard the castle now more than ever. Criston’s ineptitude made you scoff. See, if you had been the commander of the night’s watch…
Never mind the thought. You would have despised working under Aegon. The “king”, he calls himself, acts like a boy. He takes and takes and takes, not caring to mull over the consequences. Aegon has a penchant for acting first, and excogitating second, much like Aemond. The two Targaryen princes are more similar than they would care to admit.
At last, you reach Alicent’s — previously Rhaenyra’s — chambers. There was no guard on duty to protect her. Criston, the almighty Lord Commander, was nowhere to be found. Your blood boiled. Where the fuck was he? You at least expected a fight when you came here. You clench your fists in vexation. No confrontation would ensue since the lord commander is off doing anything but his job.
In spite of your ire, you open the chamber doors delicately, refusing to make a sound. You silently close the entrance behind you before making your way to the cot.
You send a prayer of gratitude when you see Alicent sound asleep in her bed, thankful that the gods had granted you this mercy. You hadn’t seen Alicent with her guard down in sixteen years. The ardent flames casted a warm glow upon her face, making her appear pacific. She was clutching her furs as she slept, a habit of hers that remained constant. Stray strands of hair covered her left eye. You almost reach out to brush them away when you recall the real reason why you were here, retracting your hand as if you had been burned.
Daemon’s voice rang in your ears, urging you to take action.
Kill Alicent Hightower.
You retrieve the dagger from your sleeve, holding it against Alicent’s throat. The light from the fireplace shone on the weapon, highlighting the Valyrian text inscribed on it.
This was the right thing to do.
For Rhaenyra.
For the realm.
You push through with shaking hands, torn between your duty and your morality. Alicent had no one to shield her. You are a craven for attempting to assassinate a defenseless woman in her sleep. You try to tell yourself that this way would be better. Alicent would not have to suffer long. But as you gaze upon her features, you could only see the girl you once loved.
In lieu of reminding yourself of Daemon’s orders, reminiscences of days making promises to one another crossed your mind. From rehearsing future marriage vows to Rhaenyra’s proclamation as the heir to the throne — the three of you promising not to hurt one another, an oath predating your ascension to the Kingsguard.
“Fool.” You call yourself out on your asinine choice, moving the dagger away from Alicent’s neck. This was wrong. You couldn’t do it. You couldn’t hurt Alicent. You had failed Rhaenyra. Pacing back and forth while running your hands through your hair, you struggle to determine your next course of action.
“That you are.” You face Alicent, your throat constricted by the sheer expression on her face. Alicent was not alarmed by the dagger you currently possess. She smiled at you the way she used to whenever you saved her from Rhaenyra in your games of pretend. “I was hoping to see you.”
The revelation caused you to drop your weapon entirely, moving it to your side, “Alicent.” Her name tumbled from your lips like a prayer.
Alicent stood so she was now face to face with you. She crossed her arms in front of her chest, “Did Rhaenyra send you?”
You look her in the eye and say, “No. Daemon did.”
Alicent nods, knowing that it was in Daemon’s nature to take matters into his own hands. The rogue prince served only himself.
The dowager queen takes a step closer while you remain standing against the wall. Your body shudders as she cups your cheek. And, as if on instinct, you lean into her touch, letting the tears fall. She doesn’t know how often you look for fragments of her in the people you encounter and feel your spirit recurrently shatter once you realize that you would never find it. You wish to lay your heart out in front of her as an offering, or to confess the contents of your prayers that have her as the keynote.
“I’m sorry.”, is all you say.
“What?” Alicent whispers.
You plunge the dagger into your abdomen just in time for Helaena to come barging into Alicent’s chambers, Jaehaera in her arms.
“They killed the boy.”
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happyhauntt · 6 months ago
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— april fic recs, brought to you by happyhauntt.
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it's that time again! a wee fic rec post for a few of the fics i read in april that altered my brain chemistry!! i've put a lil comment next to each rec because honestly writers don't get praised enough for their work these days and i wanted to show my appreciation for these talented souls!!
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criminal minds.
➡ spencer reid.
in every other life by @irndad. notes: adorableness incarnate honestly.
trouble almost all my life series by @januaryembrs. notes: might honestly have to put this on every masterlist til the end of time.
forgiven by @reiding-writing. notes: um HOW DARE YOU i sobbed my way through this
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grishaverse.
➡ kaz brekker.
breakfast by @sophierequests. notes: look i'm a simple human i see badass characters and i fall in love
➡ jesper fahey.
i'm your gal by @atlabeth. notes: NOT ENOUGH JESPER FICS and this one is GLORIOUS
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star wars.
➡ poe dameron.
the f-word by @the-little-ewok. notes: i reread this constantly pls it's so good
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moon knight.
➡ marc spector.
i should've been there by @januaryembrs. notes: not em out here ruining my life and making me sob AGAIN you simply never miss
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9-1-1.
➡ evan buckley.
take my hand by @redocity. notes: cute cute cute cute cute
emergency room by redocity. notes: the ANGST i feel well-fed
won't say i'm falling by @borntobewondering. notes: this was DELICIOUS
➡ buck / eddie.
a bleeding sun on a silver screen by @hoediaz / rarakiplin on ao3. notes: i was fully choking back sobs while reading this. i binged this fic in less than 24 hours and it has changed something fundamental inside me. i will never be the same person again. i'm billing you for my therapy.
good luck, babe by @hattalove. notes: i cackled my way through this, potentially the funniest shit ever.
hate to say i spent it all on masquerades by hattalove. notes: i sobbed and sobbed and sobbed while reading this. this fic is everything to me, it should be required reading for all my friends who want to understand me, it is beautiful and magical and i want it tattooed on my face.
don't wanna let you love somebody else but me by @shitouttabuck / fleetinghearts on ao3. notes: sheer adorableness i will well recover from this!!!!
tried and true blue by shitouttabuck / fleetinghearts on ao3. notes: SCREAMING I'M SCREAMING I MAY NEVER STOP SCREAMING
like a dog with a bird at your door by shitouttabuck / fleeting hearts on ao3. notes: iconic. truly iconic. quite possibly one of my fav fics ever written.
let the world have its way with you by shitouttabuck / fleeting hearts on ao3. notes: you don't understand how hard it was not to include every single one of shitouttabuck's fics on this list and there will almost certainly be more in future but i just want them tattooed on my forehead i feel insane
i have dreams where i kiss you and it's pink by shitouttabuck / fleeting hearts on ao3. notes: the cutest and i mean THE CUTEST shit ever
all my shattered oaths by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: i sobbed. i sobbed so hard i think i burst something honestly. everything from this author is immaculate but THIS is the holy fuckin grail and i will truly never be the same again.
let my ink stain your pages by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: castle au CASTLE AU i'm a sucker for a castle au and this is EVERYTHING
even in winter there is eranthis by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: i think about this fic daily.
your love is an oil slick by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: this is everything this is EVERYTHING to me i will reread this weekly for the rest of my life
even the darkest night by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: stardust au STARDUST AU aka my favourite movie and my favourite ship combined into a fuckin masterpiece
curl up in my heart and let me keep you by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels on ao3. notes: soft sweet my brain is mushy and i adore this
hoping it gets to you by @bucktommys / hammersmiths on ao3. notes: cute adorable stunning MAGNIFICENT
you're my whole house by @/bucktommys / hammersmiths on ao3. notes: THIS FIC OUT HERE MAKIN ME SQUEAL AND KICK MY LEGS
left unsaid by c_m2 on ao3. notes: this is mcfuckin adorable i'm crying buck deserves everything in the world
say yes to heaven by dylaesthetics on ao3. notes: okay full disclosure this made me cry so much i threw up. also it hit some pretty intense trauma for me. still so glad i read it because it was also kinda healing. and i want everyone else to suffer like i have because fuck i suffered.
if i need to rearrange my particles, i will for you by dylaesthetics on ao3. notes: author you will always be famous bc you're knocking my emotional stability OUTTA THE PARK
honestly, truly, completely by dylaesthetics on ao3. notes: simply fuckin adorable
feels like magic by 42hrb on ao3. notes: there's nothing i adore more than an urban fantasy au and this one is EXQUISITE
fallin' into your ocean eyes by princessfbi on ao3. notes: okay every part of this au is absolutely fuckin perfection i am so deeply in love with it
until now by tearsthissideofheaven on ao3. notes: a reincarnation au??? it's like you know how to ruin my life
if i never hear your voice again by @actualalligator. notes: disability rep!!!! brilliant writing!!!!
life sure can try to put love through it by @capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: ahahaha ruin my life why don't you
sometimes its hard to see what the future holds by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: olympics buddie au??? didn't know i wanted it but now i can't live without it
all good things come to an end (but it's not the end) by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: i will, in fact, devour every buddie!fwb au ever written but this one is especially great
you smiled and it was the most beautiful thing that I'd ever seen by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: coffee shop!buddie have become everything to me wdym
it's funny 'cause i've always dreamed of me and you by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: yes i did sob my heart out reading this and i'll do it again
'cause darling, you're the one by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: icymi i think this author is the best author to ever exist and i want to devour everything they write forever
i don't think that we should have friendly sex, anymore by @/capseycartwright / wafflesofdoom on ao3. notes: !!!!!!! that's it that's the note. brain: faye you can't put this many fics by the same author on one masterlist. faye: bET-
still i call it magic (when i'm next to you) by @clusterbuck / lecornergirl on ao3. notes: urban fantasy is, in fact, my shit.
(this kiss is) something i can't resist by @/clusterbuck / lecornergirl on ao3. notes: NO BC THIS HAD ME CACKLING AND ALSO IT'S BRILLIANT
give me five more minutes, baby (i'm not finished loving you) by @/clusterbuck / lecornergirl on ao3. notes: fake dating or immaculate writing??? both
cuffing season by @/clusterbuck / lecornergirl on ao3. notes: i am still laughing at this and i may never stop
270 notes · View notes
mokulule · 6 months ago
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Almanac Chapter 5
DP x DC Dead on Main First | Masterpost
Chapter 5 - December 10th, Total Lunar Eclipse
Time passed. Jason still dreamt of Gotham, little glimpses of his siblings patrolling the Alley viewed through the ever present fog. Never Bruce, never Batman.
Jason really didn’t know how to interpret those dreams. Was it wistful thinking to dream that Batman stayed out of the Alley, like Red Hood demanded? That they kept going as if Jason would be coming back? As if he was just temporarily on a mission out of town?
Or was it just his brain refusing to touch the tangled ball of emotion Bruce evoked even in his dreams?
Thankfully, none of the Alley dreams had been near as dramatic as that first nightmare. Jason was pretty sure he’d go insane if that happened, it was bad enough that first nightmare haunted him in his waking hours. He couldn’t let go the feeling that Dick had been hurt.
That it was his fault for not being there.
It was far from the first time he’d ever dreamt of Dick or one of the others getting hurt, but usually he could just do a check-up, agree to one of the multiple social invitations he most often ignored. Reassure himself they were alive, unhurt and just as obnoxious as usual and go on with his life.
He didn’t have that option.
If they died, would they come find him? He harshly pushed that thought away and focused back on Fright Knight. Not focusing properly on Fright Knight usually meant broken ribs and he was only just in time to jump aside.
One positive was that the conversation about the All-Blades had won him a measure of respect from the Knight. He’d acquired a paired set of practice blades that he now allowed Jason to use like now, though he still drilled and taught the use of a singular broadsword.
It made the training more varied, and dare Jason say it, sometimes even enjoyable. Even if Jason had the distinct feeling Fright Knight wanted to train him for the single purpose of beating him in a more even match.
The knight had even on one memorable occasion admitted that Jason might have beaten him when he was first unsealed some years ago, before he’d regained his full strength. But of course as he was now with his “mortal weaknesses” Jason didn’t stand a chance.
Still, Jason was improving. He could feel it. He had an easier time following the pace the Knight set and it wasn’t just the Knight moving at a more human speed. The fact that with the two sword style he could now attack and defend with both hands also helped bridge the gap.
Jason attacked with a downward slash, instantly dancing around the counter.
“You are not a ghost,” Fright Knights started, “but your ghostly energy is strong enough to afford you some powers. Of course not to the level of our King.”
Jason frowned, not understanding the necessity to compare him to the King. He decided to focus on the important fact. “What powers?”
“Merely the most basic.”
“That is entirely unhelpful.” Jason stepped forward and caught the overhead slash in a cross-guard before stepping to the side directing it to the ground.
“Ghost powers: invisibility, intangibility and if you’re lucky some measure of flight,” the knight elaborated haughtily.
And okay, maybe Jason felt a bit stupid now for not realizing what he’d meant with basic powers.
He dodged this time instead of blocking and stepped within the knight’s reach aiming his blade for an unprotected armpit. As if in demonstration the sword went right through him in a ripple, before he solidified and drove his armored shoulder into Jason’s chest, knocking him to the ground.
His breath was knocked out of him and for a moment he stared up into the building lunar eclipse steadily coloring the moon an ominous red-orange.
Then, he had to move!
He rolled out of the way of the downward stab and pushed himself back up to his feet, just in time to deflect another blow. The knight had upped the speed.
“What’s the point of mentioning these potential powers?” He said as he dodged another way too close call - hoping against hope to distract the knight. 

“You should use them.” Fright Knight said with another slash which Jason was fool enough to parry. The force of the blow reverberated up his arm and it was only sheer stubbornness that allowed him to hold onto the blade. He was not going to be able to swing the blade for a while.
“Shouldn’t you teach me then?” Jason yelled behind himself as he ran, he had to get distance. He had to come up with a plan.
Fright Knight laughed menacingly, and his eyes blazed green. “Powers develop best under stress.”
Jason felt himself pale. Oh shit.
Breathlessly he dodged into a doorway. The open courtyard was only an advantage for an opponent who could fly. He needed somewhere good for an ambush, somewhere to hide. His heart hammered in his chest as he ran through the castle, trying for the most complicated path he could, slamming doors after him to slow the chasing knight down.
Come on come on come on!
Phantom had told Fright Knight to keep him alive, but that was a really wide set of parameters in Jason’s experience!
The hallway curved and suddenly Jason slammed against a wall - a dead end. No no no. He cursed internally knowing too well to say anything out loud. His hands moved desperately across the stone wall; there was no hint of a secret path forward and he didn’t have time to double back. Fright Knight’s ominous laughter was too close and this hallway was too cramped to give him much movement.

The castle still disliked him.
Fright Knight came around the corner, he loomed bigger than Jason was used to. There was no escape. What wasn’t blocked with his body was blocked by the purple flames of his cloak. He drew back his sword.
“The chase is over.”
Desperately he raised his arms, though his right arm still felt dead and wouldn’t be of any use.
The sword rushed down towards him.
He screamed and then he was falling backwards, through the wall, through the floor. And another floor, floor after floor after floor. He rolled and tumbled, trying to reach for anything to stop his fall, but everything slipped through his fingers. He’d lost his swords somewhere unable to hold on to them - never lose grip on your weapons - but he hadn’t they’d gone through his fingers. This was intangibility, but how to stop it!
Stress had triggered it, he needed to calm down. Breathe slowly, count: one - two - three -
A staircase rushed up to meet him. He hit it, painfully solid. Something gave in his shoulder and then his ribs when he curled instinctively to protect his head as he tumbled the rest of the way down.
He finally landed on a cold stone floor. There was a sense of alarm around him. Not his own, no, he was just glad to no longer be moving; even if his right shoulder hurt like a bitch and he definitely had broken ribs, but he wasn’t too out of breath so probably not a punctured lung. Grimacing from the pain he pushed his upper body up with his left hand and looked around.
First rule was always know your surroundings.
There was a sarcophagus, black with green and red detailing, in the middle of the room, lit only by flickering green torchlight. There was something there. A green haze lazily swirled across the floor.
Help.
Help? Jason got to his feet with a groan. He felt so heavy. Supporting his right arm with his left he walked slowly closer to the sarcophagus. Had he seen it before? Before he could contemplate further there was the voice again.
I’m trapped.
There was someone inside the sarcophagus! Jason studied it closer, noticing a keyhole. He looked around but there didn’t seem to be any key.
Help me and I will get you home.
Home. The thought sent a pang through his chest. He wanted to go home so desperately. But he didn’t know how to help. There had to be a key somewhere, but it would be stupid to keep it here. It could be anywhere in the castle, not that the castle would help him anyway.
His eyes fell on where his left hand cradled his arm. He let go with a wince at the extra bad throb in his broken shoulder and raised his left hand in front of his face. An idea niggled at him. Would it even do anything? He didn’t know. He recalled the sensation of slipping through solid matter and saw his hand go slightly translucent.
Could he?
Slowly he reached towards the sarcophagus-
“Jason don’t!”
Jason snapped his head to the side. The King hovered at the bottom of the stairs now, hands raised in a calming motion.
“Jason don’t,” he repeated quieter, a note of pleading in his voice, worry.
Two things occurred to Jason in that fraction of a moment. One, if the Ghost King was worried whatever was in this sarcophagus might actually have the power to send him home. Two, this intangibility might just do something.
He plunged his hand into the sarcophagus.
For a moment nothing happened. It was a long enough moment for Jason to feel like an idiot, standing there with his broken arm and the other phased into a freaking sarcophagus.
Then, an odd cold-hot sensation passed up his left arm. He was displaced, put in the back seat of his own body as something else took the wheels.
Good, now let’s take a look at what we’ve got.
The sensation left faster than it had arrived and Jason had only barely taken a breath with lungs that were his own again, before a massive fist grabbed him around the throat and lifted him off his feet. His hands reached instinctively to remove the pressure around his throat. The cry of pain at moving his broken shoulder was only a wheeze past the chokehold. His left arm was just as useless the hold wouldn’t budge, no matter how he scrabbled and dug in his nails in for purchase.
“I can’t believe it took me this long to call this pitiful creature,” the voice boomed both inside and outside Jason.
A huge grey, scarred face missing the left eye came into Jason’s blurry vision. There was only cruelty to be found there.
”Ah, you didn’t bind his will.” The great head turned, revealing a mane of Lazarus green hair. “Tell me, Phantom, do you like your slaves disobedient? Is that why?”
“He is no slave,” the king, Phantom growled, tightly controlled. Glaciers cracked in the distance and when Jason tried looking at him he wasn’t sure if it was just his blurry vision or if he was blending into the darkness around him. “Let him go!”
That last word rang in Jason’s head like a bell rung right right next to his ears.
“But don’t you see, ghost child? This mortal’s life belongs to the Ghost King. The fact that I could call to him at all proves I am still the king. I will kill him and you can watch, before I take my crown back.”
The hold on his throat tightened. Jason kicked and scratched but nothing helped. He couldn’t breathe. Dark spots danced in his vision, growing with every moment. Noise rushed in his ears. He was- he was going to die!
No! He had to do something- he couldn’t let it end like this.
The hold loosened suddenly and Jason fell to his knees. He gasped, drew air into his burning chest. It was only his training that had him instantly tracking for what had happened. He blinked and squinted until his vision cleared.
Above him Phantom had the old ghost king’s wrist in a large white tipped clawed hand, he tightened his grip and the giant man fell to one knee with a grimace.
Phantom’s grin was too wide, full of too many pointy teeth, as he seemed to grow, and loomed over him.
“You miscalculated Pariah,” Phantom snarled, form rippling, cape flaring. “I am no longer fourteen year old and newly dead. Just because some mortal realities have not been updated on the change in power, doesn’t mean shit!”
He paused to lean his head closer.
“I am the King of the Infinite Realms, and the Realms are behind me.”
Jason found himself grabbed gently in dark tendrils and moved towards the wall, even as Phantom continued his verbal onslaught:
“You’ve lost your crown, your power and your loyalty. You are no king and never will be again.”
“Please,” Pariah begged, terror in his eyes.
“No. Jason traded his life to me. He is under my protection. You harmed him, you will never harm another being ever again.”
The next several moments was a whirlwind of too many claws and teeth for Jason’s mind to comprehend. Too many eyes. Green spattered wetly across the floors, the walls, the ceiling, and across Jason’s face to drip down his chin.
And the screams, oh God, the screams. It was entirely one-sided and the screams chilled Jason to the core. For all that he was no longer in a chokehold he might as well have been, because no sound, no breath could make its way out the tightness in his throat.
Finally something bright and glowing red ripped free sent flying by long fingered claws, for a moment it floated above them weightless, then Phantom’s great big maw slammed shut around it.
It crunched.
And for one dazzling second, the screams quieted. Then the whole castle shuddered. Jason covered his mouth, afraid he was going to vomit. He didn’t even know what about it caused that reaction, he wasn’t usually squeamish with violence. Only his gut told him he had witnessed something terrible.
The silence was loud in the room only broken by the occasional drop of green that fell from the ceiling to land on the cobblestone floor with loud plops.
The writhing mass of shadows and claws had stilled into a dark vaguely humanoid hunched figure. The black tendrils laid flat and motionless like a long, tattered cape spread across the floor. The glowing neon green pool left from what used to be Pariah was vivid against the black.
The tendrils around Jason didn’t hold him in place anymore, just rested one him. Still, he couldn’t bring himself to move. One tendril moved then, stroking gently and infusing soothing cold against Jason’s bruised throat. Jason gasped quietly and it was like his first real breath in hours.
“I refuse to regret it,” Phantom’s voice said then coming from all around, yet moving Jason’s attention from the tendril to the figure. “Ending another ghost is taboo for a reason. But-“ The figure turned the head revealing a pair of burning green eyes even as hundreds opened up into existence around them, all looking at Jason - perceiving him.
“He threatened you.”
Jason’s breath stopped again. There was something to be said there. Something about how the king had committed taboo for Jason. Something about how he had not just stopped the threat for now, locked it back up to escape another day; he had ended it.
Jason had never been worth that before.
There was a building pressure behind his eyes and in his chest. It was a tidal wave of old hurts. He fought against the urge to cry. Despite his efforts, a whimper escaped the back of his throat. Mortified, he closed his eyes and pressed back against the wall, he couldn’t look at Phantom’s reaction. He was terrified of judgment, or worse: pity.
“I am sorry.” His voice was but a whisper this time, as if it would prevent it from resonating in Jason’s bones. “I know I am too much, but I cannot reign it in right now.”
The tendril at his neck seemed to tremble as it stroked his bruised throat again ever so careful. “I thought- I feared I would be too late,” he explained.
And suddenly Jason realized, Phantom thought he was afraid of him. He could sense his fear, he’d told Jason once, but he couldn’t tell what he was afraid of. And yes, Jason had been afraid once, you don’t nearly have your brain melted without some sort of response, but that was not the case now. Jason couldn’t let that misunderstanding stand.
The tendrils were retreating. Jason grabbed the one that had been at his throat and forcing himself to meet what seemed to be the main pair of eyes he pressed it back to his throat.
Something passed between them, something Jason couldn’t describe. The air itself both softened and sharpened in intensity. Phantom floated closer. The tendrils were back, cold and soothing. If Jason reached out now he could touch the main darkness that was Phantom. It would take so little. Phantom’s eyes were wide and vulnerable. Jason’s breath hitched.
Something had to give.
“Great One!” A deep voice boomed in horror from the stairs, breaking the moment.
Phantom snapped his head towards the intruder. Jason gasped for air. It felt like he’d been dropped into an ice bath so suddenly was every ache and pain in his body brought back - his shoulder outright throbbed - only nothing had happened, nothing, except Phantom’s attention was no longer on him.
“Frostbite, Jason needs medical attention!” Phantom’s voice was full of relief, his features morphed gradually back into the facsimile of human he usually wore though he still seemed extra wispy. The tendrils however were gone.
Phantom’s attention turned back on Jason, he didn’t see the way the large white furred and horned creature looked around the green soaked room in fear.
Phantom made to reach for him with clawless hands, then drew back embarrassed, actually floating a step back.
“Apologies,” he said. Jason could almost see the way he turned back into the distant king straightening his shoulders and schooling his face into impassivity, like a cloak he wore - or armor. Protecting the vulnerability Jason had glimpsed.
Realizing no ‘Frostbite’ had come any closer, the king looked back over his shoulder, “Frostbite?”
“I’m coming, Great One.” The creature bowed his head as he made his way over carefully, floating to avoid the puddles.
Judging from the frown on Phantom’s face, that was not normal behavior.
“Frostbite…”
“No need to worry, Great One, I’ll make sure your friend is seen to. You can get back to the council.”
Phantom actually grimaced at that. Then he met Jason’s eyes for a heart stopping moment, holding him captive, then he looked away.
“I will see you later.”
Then he left, leaving Jason with whatever Frostbite was. One thing was sure though from the furrowed eyebrows and the sharp fangs bared at him - Frostbite didn’t like him.
-
A chapter finished! Look at me not working on my Dead on MAYn prompts -_-'
Anyways things are happening? Jason and Danny had a moment! Neither is really sure what kind of moment since they were interrupted, but hey, still a moment. I hope you enjoyed Pariah getting what was coming to him :) Anyways comments are greatly appreciated, makes it feel less like I'm screaming into the void.
(you can subscribe for updates at the masterpost)
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have-you-seen-my-sanity · 4 months ago
Text
Trying something new
Marc Spector x fem!reader
Warnings: light bondage, consensual non-consent, p in v, light touch on horror themes(?), Marc being scary, light threats, soft-dom Marc, smut.
You didn't do alot of roleplay with the boys, only some Moon Knight roleplay with Marc and some Professor Grant roleplay with Steven. Jake isn't into roleplay, but he is the one who would give ideas to the other two, and that's exactly what he did to Marc.
It was a stormy night, the wind and rain hitting the window in waves. But what made this a bit more scary was you on the couch, wrapped up in a cozy blanked while watching Terrifier 2. You sipped on your hot chocolate, the storm outside and the horror movie making you cuddle yourself in the blanket. As the movie progressed, your eyes began to grew heavy due to almost being 1 AM.
But suddenly you heard a crash coming from the kitchen. You jumped in your seat, your brain whirling with 'Did that just happen or did you imagine it?'
So you paused the movie, your heart went to your throat as you felt the adrenaline floot your system. You slowly got up, grabbing your phone and clutching it tightly. Looking into the small dark hallway, you suddenly heard the floor squeak, heavy steps coming towards you. You thought about turning on the flashlight on your phone, ready to scream. But then the person flicked on the light in the hallway, a figure dressed in black, wearing a balaclava stood before you. You could only see the eyes, the brown eyes.
You started backing off slowly, but the intruder did the same, slowly walking towards you. "Don't even think about it." He said threatingly as he saw your gaze fell upon the mug with the still hot chocolate in it. You froze in place immediately, watching as the man advanced to you. Only then did you notice the hunting knife in his hand.
The man stopped a couple of steps away from you, "Never thought you'd experience what it's like to be in a horror movie, did ya'?" He asked amused, nodding towards the paused horror movie, meanwhile you just stood there, unable to move from being shocked and scared at the same.
"Don't piss your pants yet, I only broke in and you're shaking like a leaf." He chuckled, leaning down to your level, his brown eyes looking straight into your eyes as his other gloved hand came up to pinch your cheek softly.
After what felt like hours you finally spoke up, "What do you want?" your voice trembling in fear as the man straightened up again, reaching behind himself, reaching for handcuffs before showing them to you, "Turn around and put your hands behind your back." Was the order he gave. You complied, slowly turning and putting your hands behind your back. He grabbed your wrists and clicked the handcuffs around them, but making sure they had enough space as to not scrape against your skin to hurt you.
He leaned down and placed both his gloved hands on your shoulders, making you jump slightly "I assume you'll be good for me, right? Don't wanna end up like that girl in the movie, hm?" He whispered into your ear, his hands on your shoulders squeezing gently as his breath ghosted over your shell through the balaclava.
"N-no, sir..." You replied, shaking your head. The man stepped back, his eyes roaming over your body, "You got quite the beautiful body." He began to whistle teasingly, making the hair on your neck stand up.
"And now, tell me where you hide your good valuable stuff, princess." He demanded in a firm tone, crossing his arms over his chest as you slowly turned around, unsure if you were allowed to.
"I don't have anything valuable." You murmured, eyes flicking to his brown ones before meeting the ground.
He tilted his head slightly, definitely not buying your excuse, "Who are you kidding? Nothing, eh? Bullshit."
"You can turn the whole place around if you want, I got nothing." You defended, trying to reason with him.
He uncrossed his arms and began swiping his fingers across the sharp blade of his hunting knife before looking at you, "You're telling the truth and got nothing, huh?"
You nodded, looking back on the ground.
"So you're telling me I just wasted my fucking time breaking into this place, only to find you here telling me you got nothing?" He asked frustrated.
You remained quiet.
The man stopped playing with the knife, "You know...you're wrong about that."
You looked up, giving him a puzzled expression "What?"
"You said there is nothing..." He trailed off. "But who do I got here standing infront of me?" He asked, the grin in his voice was audible. "You..." He pointed to knife at you.
"No-wait..." You backed off as he walked towards you, quickly stopping you by grabbing your shoulder, "Ah-ah, no running off for you tonight, come with me." He scolded gently, dragging you towards the bedroom.
Inside the bedroom he gently pushed you towards the bed, locking the door afterward. "You know what comes now, don't you?" He walked over to you, grabbing your cuffed wrists with one and your chin with the other hand, "I'm gonna cuff your wrist to the headboard now. And you'll be a good little captive and do what I say, alright?" He informed before freeing one wrist and forcing you to get on the bed.
He knelt behind you, taking your wrist and leaning over you to cuff it to the headboard. Your backside accidentally brushed against his crotch, letting you feel the notable bulge in his pants. "From now on you keep your eyes infront of you. Don't look back or things will get pretty ugly." He warned, patting your ass cheeks before giving each a soft squeeze.
The man slowly removed his balaclava, keeping his eyes on you to ensure you didn't look before grabbing your ankles, tugging at them to make you lay down on your stomach.
"You do got something for me, sweetie." He removed his gloves, throwing them onto the floor before undressing your lower half. His warm fingers sliding along your skin. "Since you've been so good for me, I'll be gentle with you." He assured softly as he removed the last piece. His fingers ran up your spine with just enough pressure to make your back arch as he leaned over you, his fingers tangling in your hair, holding your head gently in place "This is how we will start; I'll get you all dripping wet and ready for me before I slide my cock into your tight little pussy inch by inch..."
You nodded, accepting whatever is going to happen, feeling yourself getting wet by even thinking about it.
Marc pulled back, his hands trailing down your back, earning a small squirm from you. He pulled off his shirt and undid his pants, sliding them off, only wearing his boxers and returning to his position behind you. He slowly ran his hand upwards along your inner thigh, feeling the heat from your core. He chuckled when he discovered you already dripping onto the sheets.
"Does that turn you on?" He ran two fingers along your wet folds, making you choke out a moan
"Fuuck~" Your back arched on itself, trying to get more friction.
"Yeah it does turn you on..." He drawled, moving both his hands to your hips to pull your backside up. His fingers returning to your core, moving to rub your clit slowly.
"Feels so good-please don't stop~" You moaned as he pressed down slightly before removing his fingers from your clit.
"Relax, or I will fuck you so hard, so good, you'll either beg me to make you cum or to stop." He chuckled, reaching inside his boxers, pulling his rock hard cock out. Marc got closer to you, rubbing his entire length along your slit, slicking himself up with your wetness.
Your eyes rolled back, arching your back instinctively as the tip of his cock pressed against your entrance.
"It gets you all dripping, hmm?" He pushed inside, "Knowing that," he pushed another inch inside "if you tell the intruder," another inch of his thickness, "there is nothing to grab," he pushed another inch into you, "that he will fuck you." His hips snapped suddenly, burying his whole girth into your pussy.
"O-oh my g-" You cried out, your mind instantly getting fogged with the sensation of him.
"Mhhmm, you dirty little thing..." He pulled out almost entirely, "I'll fuck you senseless." He pushed inside all the way once more, grinding his hips against you.
A loud moan escaped you, his hand swiftly came up to shush you gently, "Shh, you gotta stay quiet for me." He slowly started moving, making you moan against his hand with every drag of his shaft inside you. "Oh no, imagine what people might think what's happening inside here..." He started moving faster, the volume of your moans got more silent again "There you go." Marc stopped, making you whimper at the loss of friction.
"Please..." You whined. He leaned closer, "Please what, princess?" He teased, starting to thrust into you again.
"Want me to fuck you, huh?" He increased his pace, his hand retracted from your mouth to grip your hips along with the other hand.
"Fine, I'll give you what you want." He warned, using your hips as leverage to slam into you again and again. The only sounds louder than your moans and his grunts was the storm outside. Marc didn't slow down, continuing to pount into you. After some time, you felt your orgasm approach rapidly, "I'm close, I'm so close!"
"I gotcha. C'mon, give it to me." He incouraged, his hand moving to stroke your clit, he felt your walls squeezing him tightly, making him lose it. Just as you came you turned your head to look into his brown eyes. With a grunt and a final, hard thrust, Marc filled you up, looking down and catching your gaze, "Thought I told you to keep your eyes ahead, baby." Marc chuckled, pulling out.
"Sorry, couldn't resist." You collapsed onto the bed. Marc collapsed beside you, "You okay?" He asked, with a note of concern in his tone.
You nodded, "Yes."
"That was quite intense." Marc remarked, "But you did great." He kissed your forehead, pulling you close.
You tugged at your cuffed wrist, "Marc, the handcuffs."
"Right, sorry." He laughed, sitting up to grab the black pants to search for the keys for the cuffs. He frowned, looking back at you, "Crap...I uh, lost the keys."
"You serious?" You sat up.
"You bet your ass I am." Marc grinned, pulling the keys out from the pocket.
"Dick." You smacked his shoulder lightly.
"For you." Marc teased, unlocking the cuffs, rubbing your wrist. "Let's go clean up." He smiled, pulling you up.
"And after that we continue with the movie, right?" You smiled, grabbing your remaining clothes. Marc grabbed his own, "Absolutely. Though, your hot chocolate isn't hot anymore." He replied, giving you a grin.
"I got you. No need for the hot chocolate." You giggled.
Marc raised an eyebrow teasingly, "That means we can get to shower cold, right?" He grinned.
"Nooo!" You laughed. "But I gotta ask, how the hell did Jake come up with this whole thing?" You asked.
Marc shrugged, "It's Jake. But he loves witnessing the show, that's for sure."
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projectionistwrites · 2 years ago
Text
FOR SCIENCE | SUBJECT 3
In which the Moon Knight alter system presents a unique opportunity to settle the nature versus nurture debate, once and for all...
Jake Lockley x afab!psychologist!reader (13.0k+)
RATING: EXPLICIT (18+, mdni) WARNINGS: fetishization of mental disorders (DID), psychoanalysis, potentially unethical scientific practices, SMUT (dom/sub dynamics, fingering, oral (f! and m!receiving), unprotected p in v sex, doggystyle, spanking, mean!Jake, degradation, dacryphilia, daddy/papi kink, cum eating, creampie, soft sex, needy/touch-starved!Jake, praise kink, dirty talk), lots of spanish NOTES: jake lockley deserves so much love. this was hard to write, i had so much i wanted to put into this chapter and i hope it all came through okay. also, i am not a native spanish speaker, but i worked really hard to make sure all of my conjugations/phrases were correct, but still, feel free to correct me! this is the final case study installment of this series, there will be one final concluding chapter (+ potentially a bonus part bc i’m feeling generous) DISCLAIMER: although i’m incredibly knowledgeable about psychology, i am NOT a professional. all psychoanalyses made throughout the course of this storyline are entirely my own, based on my own interpretations of the characters. in a similar vein, i am also not an expert on DID specifically (although i am well-read on mental disorders and diagnoses), so i apologize for any incorrect terminology or misrepresentation. don’t hesitate to call me out if i say something wrong!
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CASE STUDY: JAKE LOCKLEY
ROLE IN COGNITIVE SYSTEM: Protector
ATTACHMENT STYLE: Dismissive
CHARACTERISTICS: volatile, tenacious, arrogant, cunning, reticent; a true adrenaline junkie (engages in risky behavior in an attempt to fill his emotional deficit with a brief but intense adrenaline rush); extremely autonomous.
SPLIT FROM HOST: ??? currently unknown/unconfirmed (predicted to have emerged as a result of some feeling of physical inadequacy or repeated threats to safety; may potentially trace back to host's service in the military).
TRAUMA RESPONSE: thinks every hill is one to die on; unwilling to compromise or make sacrifices in fear of revealing vulnerability; maintains face no matter the consequence.
SEXUAL PRESENTATION: demanding, excitable, impetuous, unapologetic, aggressive; unafraid to take what he wants, but uncomfortable with affection.
Your heart was picking up speed as you knocked loudly against the door for the fifth time.
Surely he was inside. Where the hell else would he be? You’d texted with him just hours before—well, technically not Jake, since he refused to use a phone, but Marc—confirming that you were still good for your previously scheduled arrangement. Had he changed his mind? Did something happen?
Your anxiety got the better of you as you fished around in your jacket pocket to pull out your keyring. Steven had given you a copy of the key to their flat in case you ever needed it, or if you wanted to come over before he got home from work. You had yet to actually use it, but you figured this constituted as enough of an emergency to warrant your uninvited entrance.
You clumsily slipped the brass into the keyhole and jiggled it, twisting it until you heard the click of the lock. You silently prayed that Jake—or whoever was fronting—hadn’t engaged any of the other locks on the door that could only be unhinged from the inside. Fortunately for you, the knob twisted and the door swung open with ease, revealing the familiarity of the flat within.
It was... quiet. Not eerily so, but enough to make you proceed with caution. Everything appeared to be in order, undisturbed and in its place, but still, you felt a sense of uneasiness crawl up your spine.
You weren’t a stranger to the feeling, though. You often felt this way when you were in the company of Jake. You enjoyed his presence, and wanted to get to know him better, but still, he was unpredictable and volatile—you never knew what to expect when he was fronting. You couldn’t read him as well as the other two alters, and as someone who had an affinity for picking up on unspoken emotional cues, you weren't particularly fond of the element of surprise.
You heard a low buzz from somewhere off to your right, and as the door clicked shut behind you, you wandered towards the source of the noise on the other side of the apartment. As you grew closer, you recognized the previously indiscernible sound—humming.
“...Jake?”
You called out softly, and just as rounded the edge of the bookshelf that separated the living space from the bedroom, the door to the bathroom flew open.
The man in question strolled through the doorway, steam billowing behind him, whistling to himself, but he froze when he saw you standing before him. He quickly recovered from his initial shock, however.
“Bebita. Looks like you need to work on your patience.”
He teased, and you felt your mouth run dry as you took in his appearance. He’d clearly just finished up in the shower—there were still droplets of water rolling down his shoulders and the toned skin of his chest and abdomen, trailing southbound where a white towel hung lowly on his hips. You could see the dark hair of his happy trail against his navel, the towel very loosely covering his modesty. His hair was wet and tussled, curls falling across his forehead, and you’d be lying if you said this wasn’t one of the most attractive sights you’d ever seen in your life.
Much to your chagrin, he seemed to pick up on the effect that his appearance had on you. You watched as his lips curled into a devilish grin, staring at you with a depraved look in his deep brown eyes that only Jake was capable of.
“Why—Why didn’t you answer the door?”
Your voice wavered slightly, betraying you in your attempt to appear collected. His head tilted slightly in question.
“Because...I was in the shower.”
Oh. Right.
You swallowed, lips downturned into a small frown, suddenly feeling sheepish at your previous concern for his safety. However, your focus returned to Jake as he slinked forward, taking a few slow, deliberate steps in your direction.
“You’re blushing, mi vida. Am I making you nervous?”
You unconsciously shook your head at his question, although you could feel your heart racing in your chest as he drew closer to you.
“No? Hm, that’s a shame. I could’ve sworn I saw you staring at my cock.”
He paused when only a foot and a half remained between you, and you felt your face grow even redder at his statement. As much as you tried to resist, as much as you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction, your gaze involuntarily flickered down to glance at his crotch—you could see the outline of his hardening member through the soft material of the towel, more prominent than it had been even a few seconds prior.
A dark chuckle escaped him, and you forced your gaze back onto his face. He was grinning wickedly, gazing at you with a carnal gleam in his eye.
“Está bien, bebita. I know how much you like it. That’s why you rushed in here, isn’t it? Didn’t want to wait for papi’s cock any longer?”
Your breath hitched in your throat. Your jaw fell slack at the nickname he assigned to himself—you felt your knees grow weak. Just as you’d said—unpredictable. You certainly hadn’t expected that.
But fuck, you really liked it.
His smirk turned into a toothy grin as he observed your reaction to his taunt. One more step towards you and you were only a short distance apart. You could see moisture congregating in the divot of his collarbone, and you desperately wanted to lick at the pooled water.
“Are you going to be good for me, bebita?”
You nodded dumbly at him, any cohesive thought escaping from your brain as all you could perceive was Jake, Jake, Jake. He parroted your senseless nodding, mocking you condescendingly. Without another word, he dropped the towel from his waist and it pooled around his ankles, exposing his fully-erect member to your sight, and you swooned.
His tongue traced over his lower lip sensually, looking at you through hooded eyes. A shadow crossed his face as his mouth contorted into a sneer.
“Get on your knees.”
You obeyed before you even consciously processed the command, collapsing onto your knees before him, your abrupt fall cushioned by his discarded towel. Your mouth watered as you became eye-level with the hardness of his cock, the vein beneath the underside of his shaft just begging for your attention. You resisted, instead opting to stare up at Jake’s face expectantly, awaiting further instruction. It was clear to you that he liked to be in control.
He smirked at your complacency, his hand reaching up to lazily stroke his cock a few times, watching the way your eyes followed the movement of his hands with laser focus, your lips slightly parted in anticipation. He tilted his hips forward and slapped your cheeks with the ruddy head of his cock a few times, and you whimpered at the action, eyes squeezed shut tightly with restraint.
“Stick out your tongue for me, bebita.”
You obliged, opening your mouth wide and letting your tongue loll out past your lips. He tapped his length against the slick muscle, and you savored the familiar tang of his precum on your tastebuds as he pulled back to fist at his cock again. You whined as he withdrew from you, but he just tutted at you condescendingly, slapping your cheek once more with his member.
“Oh, pobrecita. You want papi to let you play with his cock?”
You nodded feverishly, staring up at him through your lashes, doe-eyed. He pouted his lip out in a look of mock pity before removing his hand from his length.
“Go on, then, bebita.”
You lurched forward, your tongue flexing to lick a long stripe on the underside of his cock, tracing the jagged vein that had enticed you earlier. He hummed at the action, watching as you eagerly lifted your hands to begin slowly pumping the velvety skin of his shaft, your lips suctioning around the flushed tip and tongue dipping into the slit. A low groan rumbled deep within his chest as you bobbed your head, eyes never leaving his face as you studied each reaction he had to your movements.
“There you go, mi vida. So good for papi.”
You moaned around his cock at the repeated use of the title, and he chuckled at your obvious approval, one hand finally reaching up to card through your hair as you continued to work more of his length into your mouth.
“You gonna let papi fuck your pretty little mouth, hm?”
He pulled his hips back, removing his member from your touch and you gasped in a breath. You nodded in response to his question, opening your mouth expectantly, and he all but laughed at your eagerness.
“You want it bad, huh, bebita? You gonna ask nicely?”
“Please, papi.”
The word sounded foreign on your tongue, but your discomfort melted away when you saw Jake’s cock jump at the sound of your desperate pleading and he threw his head back in satisfaction.
“Please, fuck my face. Want to feel you in my throat. Please.”
He seemed satisfied with your begging as he wrapped both of his hands in your hair, tilting your head upward and guiding your towards his awaiting length. When your hands reached up to rest on his thighs, he pulled back, hissing at you.
“No, mi vida. Hands behind your back. Don’t make me tell you again.”
You clasped your hands behind yourself obediently, opening your mouth again, and you finally felt the fat tip of his cock rest against your tongue.
You practically choked when he harshly thrusted into your mouth, sinking nearly his entire length into your throat without warning. Before you could even recover, he was pulling back and repeating the motion, not giving you any time to adjust to the intrusion or ease you into a rhythm. You gagged unceremoniously as he fucked your face with reckless abandon, so you tried to slacken your jaw and just take it.
“Look at you, mi llorica. So beautiful when you cry for me, with my cock in your mouth.”
You could barely see him through the blur of tears as they rolled down your cheeks, mixing with the saliva that was foaming around your lips and dribbling down your chin. He picked up his pace, grunting with each motion, the head of his cock bruising the back of your throat with every forward thrust. He was guiding your head forward and backward in time with his movements, successfully burying himself into your face.
“You want me to cum down your throat, bebita? Going to take everything papi gives you?”
You garbled around his length as his balls slapped against your chin, and you felt his cock throb on your tongue as he sheathed himself completely inside of you, growling out your name as he shot his load as deep into your throat as he could. Still, he challenged you more, forcing himself further and further down your throat with each spurt of cum that he released, your nose smushed against his pubic bone as you swallowed around him, trying with all of your might to prevent yourself from gagging and ruining his orgasm.
With a satisfied groan, he slowly pulled his spent member from your mouth, and you gasped harshly, sucking in a deep breath of air and finally allowing the muscles of your neck to relax. There was a soreness lingering in the back of your throat, but you relished in the feeling as you wiped the mix of spit and tears from your face with the back of your hand, staring up at the fucked-out expression that Jake offered you.
“Did so well for me, bebita. What do you say to papi?”
There was an edge to his tone, his domineering persona not faltering for even a second as your scratchy voice responded accordingly.
“Thank you, papi.”
He nodded at you approvingly, watching as you blinked up at him expectantly. He was pleasantly surprised at just how quickly you’d fallen into submission—he thought he might have to coax you into cooperating with him, but it was clear to him that you were eager to please, your eyes glistening with residual tears from one of the best goddamned blowjobs he’d ever had in his life.
He leaned down and clasped his hands on your shoulders, yanking you to your feet without a word. You saw his eyes flicker down to your swollen, spit-soaked lips, but his gaze was hard as he took a step away from you, as if to resist the temptation to kiss you.
“Strip. Hands and knees, on the bed for me. Now, bebita.”
You didn’t protest as you hastily heeded his words, shedding your layers of clothing and tossing them to the floor before you scampered back towards the bed, crawling to your hands and knees in the center, head facing towards the pillows. You could hear Jake creeping up behind you, but you resisted the urge to turn your head and follow his movements, opting instead to squeeze your eyes shut and wait.
You weren’t afraid of Jake. Of course you weren’t. You knew he’d never hurt you—not unless you wanted him to. Nonetheless, you knew what he was capable of—actually, that was the thing. You didn’t know what he was capable of, but still, you could see the thinly-veiled chaos that swirled behind his coffee-colored irises, could sense the firm restraint he forced upon himself when he was around you, holding some unnamed beast at bay on your behalf. It scared you, but also sparked something inside of you—a primitive, savage excitement as he stalked you like his prey. Was it wrong if you secretly hoped he’d unleash the mayhem that resided within him, let himself go? God only knows the man deserved an outlet in which to channel his frustrations.
You felt the mattress dip down behind you, Jake kneeling on the bed behind your bowed position—your nerves spiked at the vulnerability you displayed, exposed as you practically felt his eyes tear through your body with crazed, wanton desire.
You were surprised to feel a soft caress on your hips, his rough fingers delicately ghosting over the supple skin on your waist. It was comforting, soothing, and surprising—a needed reassurance under his scrutinizing gaze. You felt his lips brush softly against the tender flesh of your left buttock, and you relaxed slightly, letting yourself sink down to your forearms but keeping your ass raised with the arching of your back.
“Are you ready, mi vida?”
He asked quietly, and you managed to squeak out a small ‘yes’ before sinking further into the bed and shifting your hips backs toward him in anticipation. He chuckled at your obvious eagerness, greedy for his touch, and you startled when his tender hold on your hips tightened into a bruising grip, the soft press of his lip to your left asscheek morphing until he was sinking his teeth into the flesh with a playful nip.
You yelped at the abrupt shift in demeanor, the sound earning you a sharp smack to your other cheek, his palm quickly rubbing the afflicted area to soothe the lingering sting of his spanking. You pressed your forehead into the sheet beneath you, your legs beginning to quiver with desperation.
“You’re going to stay like this, and take what I give you. Don’t move. ¿Vale, bebita?”
You nodded, but were met with another harsh swat on your backside at your lack of a verbal confirmation.
“Yes! Okay, papi, okay. Just—please.”
You were practically dripping onto the mattress beneath you, your arousal slickening your needy cunt as you desperately sought out any stimulation.
The pads of his fingers experimentally swiped through your folds without warning, and you jolted, involuntarily pushing your hips back to follow the withdrawal of his touch. Another firm slap against your opposite asscheek, a whimper escaping your lips as he scolded you.
“Stay still, bebita. Stop squirming.”
His order briefly brought you back to your first time with Marc, who had requested the same thing, but the words felt heavier when they were uttered by Jake—you knew he wouldn’t hesitate to find a way to make you comply.
When his fingers made contact with your core again, you clenched your muscles, forcing yourself to remain completely motionless, and you were rewarded with the tip of his digit just barely skimming over your clit. You whined at the sensation, but held your position.
Jake was pleased with your cooperation, but you couldn’t help but quake when you felt his tongue sweep through your folds to taste you. The spank he offered was softer, taking pity on you as he leaned forward and fully sank his mouth into your awaiting cunt. You mewled, fingers twisting into the fabric of the sheets beneath you and fisting at them tightly in an effort to keep still.
He was moaning shamelessly into your sex, his method tactless, sloppy and rushed. His movements weren’t practiced and deliberate like Marc’s, nor careful and precise like Steven’s—no, Jake was eating you out like a man starved, greedily mouthing at every part of you and reveling in the sounds that escaped your lips.
His hand lifted and he sank two fingers into your entrance, curling them forward frantically as his mouth latched onto your clit. He was working you to your orgasm quickly, hurriedly, desperate to feel you clamp down around him and cry out his name.
Your thighs were beginning to tremble. He must’ve sensed you were close, because he doubled his efforts, the vibrations from his growling buzzing through your flesh and pushing you over the precipice. On its own accord, your body lurched back towards him, your cunt grinding back against his face as your eyes rolled, your walls contracting around his digits and your juices leaking onto his awaiting tongue.
You felt dizzy, faint, your efforts to hold yourself upright through your climax exhausted you, and when you came down from your intense high, you felt Jake draw himself away from you, slow and intimidating. You felt your pulse spike as you awaited whatever came next. His large hand caressed your ass, gently smoothing over your soft flesh in back-and-forth motions.
“Sabe a miel, bebita. Such a pretty little pussy.”
His touch on your skin halted, and you felt his body lean over your back, his lips coming to brush against the nape of your neck.
“But you didn’t follow my instructions, pobrecita. You need to learn how to listen.”
You cried out when his hand swatted at your abused clit, your body jumping at the painful sensation in an attempt to escape his cruel attack. You felt one arm snake beneath your stomach to hold you upright, his forearm pressing your hips back towards him and keeping you there.
“I let you cum, even after you moved when I told you not to. Do you like being a brat, hm?”
You shook your head—another smack to your cunt, and you whimpered.
“No! No, m’sorry, papi, I—”
“Don’t you think I’ve been generous? Spoiling you? And still, you’re ungrateful, bebita.”
Your body flinched in preparation for the next blow, but instead, you felt his lips tenderly brush a kiss to the flesh of your ass.
“Compórtate. I think I need to teach you how to mind your manners.”
He slapped your ass again, harder than before, and you could feel the lingering sting forming a welt across your skin. He hummed.
“What do you say to papi, hm? For being so good to you?”
“Thank you, papi.”
You whimpered, tears starting to dampen the sheets beneath your face. Your appreciation earned you a soothing hand across the flesh he'd just struck.
“That’s right. Five more times, bebita.”
You sobbed in protest, body trying to pull away from him, but his arm wrapped around your torso forced you into place. He cooed at you.
“It’s okay, pobrecita. You’re going to say thank you after every single one, and then papi will fuck you. ¿Sí?”
He didn’t wait for your response. He smacked your clit, the sting burning its way through your lower belly. You choked back another sob.
“Th—thank you, papi.”
You stuttered, voice barely audible from where your cheek was smushed into the bedding, but Jake took pity on you. Two, three, four more times—the final blow landed sharply against your cunt, and you whimpered out your gratitude, eyes squeezed shut tight and your lip starting to freckle with blood from where you’d held it between your teeth.
He placed gentle kisses on your lower back, your ass, as far as he could reach, his arm still supporting your weight while the other came to softly smooth over your hip. Your mind was cloudy, your body completely surrendering to Jake’s will as you descended into subspace, clinging to his approval.
“You want my cock, mi vida?”
He asked gruffly, and you could feel his hardened length prod against your behind as he leaned further over you to press more kisses on your shoulders. You whined.
“Yes, papi, please, want you inside me, please—”
He shushed you calmly, sitting back to kneel behind you. He lifted your hips higher in the air with his arm, and you felt the flushed head of his cock brush across your soaked folds once, then twice. You mewled.
Without warning, Jake sank into you, bottoming out with one harsh stroke as his balls pressed against your puffy clit. You cried out, legs turning to jelly and giving out from beneath you, but he held you upright, keeping you stable in his arms.
“Mierda. Your little cunt is swallowing me, bebita.”
He withdrew slowly, and you could feel each ridge of his length as he pulled out until just the tip remained. Even though you braced yourself, you couldn’t prepare for the way he slammed back into you, his pelvis flush against your tailbone as you cried, pleasure sparking at the bottom of your spine in spite of the pain.
Jake’s pace was relentless, unforgiving, hips snapping forward over and over, the sound of skin slapping skin drowned out by your pathetic sobbing as your walls throbbed around his member. His teeth were bared as he railed into you, intently watching the place his cock was splitting you open.
“Carajo, you’re squeezing me so tight—going to cum for you, bebita.”
He practically growled as he speared you, and another orgasm was ripped from you with a particularly harsh thrust of his hips. Your cunt clamped down around him as he let out a long, low whine, hips stuttering at the sensation.
He let you collapse into the bed as he began frantically jerking his cock, pulling out of you just in time to shoot his load all across the reddening flesh of your ass. He let out a series of grunts, coupled with Spanglish expletives as he thrusted into his fist, his head thrown back in bliss. You felt globs of his hot spend settle onto your skin, streaking your backside with his seed as he panted above you, falling back onto his heels as he drank in the aftermath of his intense orgasm that was now painting your skin.
The moments that followed blurred together as you drifted aimlessly in the wakes of your pleasure, eyes fluttering in their attempt to keep you awake. Jake left you for several minutes, the absence of his body heat making goosebumps erupt across your skin, but you were too exhausted to move.
When he finally returned, you felt him softly dab the remnants of his ejaculate from your back before he gently shifted you onto your back, tucking an arm beneath your knees and the other around your shoulders as he hoisted you into the air. You whimpered slightly at the soreness in your muscles, your head falling limp against his bare shoulder as he carried you off. You weren’t consciously aware of your surroundings, but the sensation of warm water surrounding you helped ease the ache in your bones and clear the haze that had overtaken your mind. Jake gently lowered you into the bathtub, carefully tilting your head back to rest against the ceramic edge as you let out a relieved sigh, sinking into the welcoming heat of the water.
You felt as if you’d only blinked when you awoke, the water around you now lukewarm and the candle that had been burning beside you melted to the wick. You shifted yourself upward, hissing slightly at the soreness in your thighs, but you forced yourself to stand and exit the tub.
Silence surrounded you as you leaned to pull the plug from the drain before you noticed the plush white towel that had been folded neatly and left on the lid of the toilet for you. You gratefully reached it and wrapped it around your body, noticing the pruning of your fingertips.
How long had you been asleep?
You tentatively creaked open the bathroom door and peered outside into the apartment. It was dark, and empty, for all you could see, and you took a few cautious steps out into the room.
“Jake?”
You said softly, your soft call sounding much too loud in the quiet of the space. You proceeded forward towards the bed, shrouded only in light from the single lamp that was lit from across the way. Your clothes had been folded neatly and left in a pile at the foot of the bed, and you saw a small piece of paper settled on top. A note.
You picked it up and scanned it over once, then twice. You could tell this was Jake’s handwriting—it was a messy scrawl with an evident slant, the letters each written harshly with sharp lines. It was different from Steven’s languid scribbling, his words swirling together with smooth, clean strokes, and also from Marc’s, whose blocky penmanship was unmistakable. You couldn’t marvel at the fact that all three alters had markedly distinct handwriting, though, too focused on the content of the message to give it a second thought.
Went out for a drive Text when you get home See you tomorrow.
JAKE
You frowned slightly, heart feeling heavy in your chest as you forced yourself into your clothes. You checked the time—11:28. You’d conked out for nearly two hours, and you wondered how long ago Jake had stepped out. Was he waiting for your text in order to come back home? Waiting for you to leave so he didn’t have to see you?
You had absolutely no right to be upset, you knew. You should be grateful that he was sticking to his ordinary routine after your sexual encounter in honor of your experiment, but still, a pang of hurt bloomed in your chest. You briefly returned to the bathroom to blow out the flickering lavender candle before heading out the door, your legs wobbly as you trekked the two blocks back to your own apartment.
It was nearly midnight when you finally got home. You reached for your phone and shot the boys a brief message.
made it back safely x
A response came in barely thirty seconds later.
I'm so sorry Y/N He shouldn't have done this to you M
You fell into your bed immediately, eyes skimming Marc’s words, your lips pursing slightly. You let out a long sigh before typing your reply.
it's ok marc, i promise he didn’t do anything wrong i had a nice bath! :) tell jake i said goodnight xx
You connected your phone to the charger before setting it on the nightstand, quickly turning over and sinking into your pillow, trying to ignore the tears that were stinging the back of your eyes.
Your phone buzzed with a final message.
Sleep well baby Hope you give him hell tomorrow M
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POINTS OF CONTENTION:
- slowing down
- embracing vulnerability and confiding in others
- accepting intimacy and allowing raw emotion
TREATMENT: - patience, foreplay - allowing himself to feel - aftercare (!)
You were, in fact, not going to give him Hell. Just the opposite, actually.
Jake spent too much of his time letting his demons possess him. Perhaps he needed a little taste of Heaven to show him what he's missing.
“Hi, Jake.”
You greeted shyly when the door swung inward. He leaned against the doorframe slightly, looking at you down the length of his nose. He didn’t say anything—just watched you. Studied you. Observing. After a few brief moments, you cleared your throat.
“Can I—uh, can I come in?”
A beat passed before he finally sidled back into the apartment, opening the door just enough to let you slip inside. Your side brushed against his front when you passed him, and the lingering smell of cigarette smoke clung to his white shirt. Oh, Steven would be livid.
You didn’t wait for an invitation before plopping down on one end of the sofa. Jake quirked a brow at your forwardness, and you signaled with the jerk of your head for him to join you on the other end. He offered a slow, dramatic roll of his eyes before seating himself beside you.
“What time did you get home last night?”
You asked quietly, fiddling with the hem of your shirt as you avoided his gaze. He breathed out a slow breath.
“Not too late. Hardly slept, though—your boyfriend wasn’t very happy with me. Kept me up all night, nagging at me.”
You frowned, finally noticing the deep purplish bags that had settled beneath his eyes. His curls were spilling out from beneath the brim of his flat cap.
“I’m sorry, Jake. Marc isn’t s’posed to be bothering you—it’s your weekend.”
He waved a dismissive hand, turning to settle further into the couch as he stared at some point straight ahead of him.
“No pasa nada. I’m used to it.”
He shifted in his seat slightly, his brows furrowing, and you could tell that he was receiving an earful from Marc.
“I’m—I guess I’m sorry, mi vida, if I upset you.”
You shook your head derisively.
“No, Jake, it’s—you’re fine. That’s what I asked you to do—treat me like any other girl.”
He let out a humorless bark of a laugh, knuckles rubbing over the stubbled skin of his jaw.
“Any other girl wouldn’t have gotten to see my bed, bebita.”
He noticed the perplexed look on your face and offered a sigh.
“It’s not...often, that I sleep with anyone like this. Usually it’s in the back of my cab, or a quick one in a closet—tienes suerte, mi vida. It’s rare they ever see me a second time.”
You felt a deep sadness wash over you at his confession. All Jake knew were rushed, meaningless hookups, no strings attached and no obligations. One and done.
“Is that why you didn’t kiss me, yesterday?”
Jake looked startled by your question, eyes widening marginally as his brows furrowed deeply. His lips set into a straight line, his jaw clenching tightly.
“I did kiss you. A lot.”
He insisted softly. You shook your head.
“No, Jake. A real kiss. You wouldn’t do it. Are—Is that not usually a part of your... you know?”
His knee began anxiously bouncing, his discomfort making itself evident to you.
“No sé. Never really thought about it before.”
You stood from the couch, and his stare followed your movements sharply as you crossed the short distance between you, stepping forward to stand between his spread legs. He looked up at you with dark, brooding eyes, uncertainty churning just beneath the surface. You slowly moved to sit on his lap, your thighs slotting on either side of his hips so you were straddling him. His hands mindlessly settled on your waist, his touch timid and delicate. Your fingers smoothed over his chest as you wrapped your arms around his neck.
“Can I kiss you, Jake?”
His lips silently parted, a flash of fear briefly flickering over his features as he gazed up at you longingly. His nervousness was palpable, his hesitancy evident through the tension in his shoulders and the crease between his brow. He didn’t offer you a response, so you carefully began leaning your face towards him, tilting your head so your nose brushed against his. You felt his stuttering exhale fan out across your face before you finally let your lips brush over his own.
It was soft, and tentative, as if he was unsure of how to respond or worried he would somehow break you. You pressed your mouth a bit firmer to his, melding against him. You wished, hoped he could feel all your emotions come through the kiss—how much you cared for him, how much you wanted to show him that. Maybe your manifestation worked, because after his few fleeting seconds of unresponsiveness, you felt him sink into the feeling, one arm traveling from your waist up your back to cradle the back of your head in his hand.
He shifted beneath you, trying to pull you closer, as if you weren’t already on top of him. You could feel the stiffness vacate his muscles as the kiss grew feverish, desperate, his lips moving against yours hastily and messily. His free hand began to roam the expanse of your back as he pressed his torso into your own, your nose smushing against his cheek as he gripped you tighter.
He whined when your tongue swiped across the seam of his mouth, his lips immediately parting to allow you access. You dove in to taste him, the stale tobacco and faint mint of his toothpaste overtaking your senses and inebriating you with the distinctive flavor of Jake. His own tongue began to tussle with yours as he mirrored your actions, your teeth clashing messily as he all but tried to swallow you whole.
You pulled back abruptly, gasping in a breath, and his mouth chased yours in a frantic attempt to maintain contact. You felt his hips instinctually rut up against you, his hands still pulling you tightly against his body as he nuzzled into your neck, inhaling the scent of your soft skin.
“Slow down, Jake, take it easy.”
You placed both of your hands on either one of his shoulders and forced him to relax against the couch, his body following your guidance as he sank backwards at your request. His eyes were practically crazed, his lips swollen and ruddy as he looked up at you with a half-lidded gaze, chest heaving with panted breaths.
“Oh, hermosa.”
His muttered, his grip pulling you back to his chest as he surged forward to hungrily meet your lips again, his hands beginning to claw over every inch of your body he could reach, trying to feel all of you. You pushed him away again, more forcefully this time, and he fell backwards with a grunt.
“Hey, relax. It’s okay, I’m not going anywhere, I promise.”
A flicker of sadness glinted briefly in his dark eyes, a blink-and-you'll-miss-it expression, but you caught it. You offered him a soft, assuring smile, grabbing the hat from his head and tossing it to the side so you could sink your fingers into his hair. He leaned back into your touch as your nails gently scratched at his scalp, a soft, breathless moan breaking from his lips as his eyes fell shut. You leaned forward and pressed a single kiss to the exposed skin of his throat.
“Come on, handsome.”
He was reluctant to loosen his hold on you, but you reached for his hand and clutched his fingers tightly so he could still feel you touching him somewhere. You led him over to the bed, pausing at the foot of it and gesturing with a nod of your head for him to lay down. He quirked a brow at you, lips curling into a mischievous grin.
“You going to punish me for being so hard on you yesterday, bebita?”
You weren’t oblivious to the excitement that shone in his eyes—he seemed enticed by the possibility of you torturing him in a similar vein to Marc, and you figured that was some information you could keep in your back pocket for future reference.
Instead, you let out a saccharine giggle—it was sickeningly sweet, cloyingly so, and Jake might’ve gotten a toothache from the sugar if it weren’t for the softness with which you crept over his splayed-out body, sinking your front against his as you pressed a featherlight peck on his lips.
“No, Jake. Nothing like that.”
You let your weight settle onto him, straddling his lap and letting your chest fall flush against his as you kissed him again—he mouthed at you hungrily, trying to force his tongue into your mouth, fighting for dominance, and you gently pulled away.
“Hey, tough guy. What’s your rush?”
His brows furrowed, gaze flickering from your eyes and down to your dewy lips, his pupils blown wide. You smiled sweetly at him.
“Slow down, okay? There’s no hurry, really. Let me just feel you.”
He blew out a huff of air before your lips were on his again, and he heeded your request, letting you take the lead as your poured all of your passion into the kiss. It was slow, deep, intimate, your fingers sliding beneath the hem of his shirt and across the hot skin of his torso, pushing the material up as you went. You slowly drew back to discard the article of clothing before immediately latching your mouth to his, slow movements still heavy and dripping with desire. You finally parted his lips with the swipe of your tongue, and you felt his fingers sink into your hair, tilting his head for a better angle with which to lavish you.
You could feel him getting greedier as he pressed his body up into your warmth, hands sliding down the expanse of your back and making a move to rip your shirt from your body. You pulled back suddenly, giving him a warning look.
“Hey. Slow.”
You reminded, and he stuttered out an exhale, his fingers gradually raising your shirt above your head as he tossed it to the side. His eyes ravished your body as his fingers traced along the newly exposed skin of your sides, his touch softly skimming your curves before coming up to cup at your breasts. You smiled sweetly down at him as he pressed a few fervent kisses to your collarbone. His dark eyes found yours, lips parted provocatively as he silently asked for your permission. You nodded gently, and his fingers trembled with restraint as he slowly reached around to unclasp your bra.
It was taking everything within his power not to flip you over and pound into you, but something about the look in your eye—reverent, devoted, loving—he didn’t mind too much.
When your breasts exposed themselves to him, he made a low rumbling noise from the back of his throat, leaning forward to latch onto one of your nipples hastily. You tugged at his hair and he groaned in frustration.
“Jake.”
You warned, and he pressed his face down into your cleavage, his breathing ragged and shallow.
“Mierda, bebita. You like being on top so much, hm? Like being in control of papi?”
You gently pulled at his curls again, forcing his face to lift and look up at you. You regarded him softly, one of your hands coming to delicately trace over his jaw and cheekbone.
“No, honey. None of that, okay?”
His brows furrowed, and you leaned down to press a kiss against the crease between them.
“It’s just you and me. Jake and Y/N.”
He repeated your name back to you in a low murmur, as if saying it for the very first time. Actually, now that you thought about it—maybe it was. Jake had never addressed you by your name before, only used endearments to speak with you.
He seemed puzzled by your suggestion, eyes round and questioning and lost, almost uncomfortable with the proposal of having you call him by his actual name.
“You can be on top if you really want to, Jake.”
You pressed a kiss to his nose, then atop both of his fluttering eyelids, then one in the center of his hairline.
“You just—have to be patient.”
You pressed your forehead against his, letting your eyes drift shut as you took in the soft sound of his breathing, finally settling down and evening out. You felt his head tilt up to meet yours again, and you let him kiss you, his pace steady and deliberate, easing you into a rhythm. His hands slowly crawled up your spine, cradling you close to him as he licked into your mouth, his hips bucking up just slightly when you gently tugged at his lower lip with your teeth. He pulled away, shaking his head at your flirtatious action and giving you a playful glare before mouthing gently at your jawline, down your neck and behind your ear. When you leaned into his touch, he sank his teeth in and suckled a deep red mark into your skin, earning a soft whimper in appreciation. His lips stayed pressed against you as they trailed down the column of your neck, along your collarbone and shoulder, and finally down to the flesh of your breasts.
You breathed out a low moan when he placed wet open-mouthed kisses along the top curves of your chest, slowly teasing lower until his teeth scraped your hardened nipple and his lips puckered around it. His hand came to palm at your other breast, kneading at the doughy flesh as he stared up at you seductively through his lashes.
“Fuck, Jake.”
You whimpered, and the sound of his name rolling so deliciously off of your tongue caused his hips to grind up against you once more. When he was satisfied with the array of red and purple marks he’d imprinted on your skin, he dragged his face back up to your own and pressed his lips to yours once again.
You were impressed with his restraint. You could feel the hardness in his muscles, see the tension in his thick shoulders as he forced himself to take his time instead of jumping your bones from the start. You hummed against his mouth before pulling yourself away and off of his lap, your fingers slowly trailing down the length of his torso before settling on the buckle of his jeans.
His breath stuttered at the action, his abdominal muscles contracting as he awaited your next move. You gently reached down to palm at his bulge through the layers of fabric and he groaned throatily, his eyes fluttering shut at the much needed stimulation. Your fingers deftly worked to unloop his belt before unbuttoning his jeans, and he lifted his hips to assist you in pulling them off of him.
When he was left in just his briefs, you pressed gently against his shoulder to make him lay back down and relax. He sank back into the pillows, propped up so he had a decent view of you between his legs, your fingers teasingly stroking over his length through the thin cotton of his boxers. He hissed.
“Estás una calientapollas. Please, hermosa. Y/N.”
He saw the way your eyes darted to his face at the sound of your name, your lips parting and your fingers ceasing their gentle sweeping motion over his cock. You held his gaze as you slowly reached up towards the waistband of his briefs and coaxed them down his legs, freeing his member that had been straining against the fabric.
After you’d tossed his final undergarment aside, you settled back between Jake's legs, your hands stroking each of his inner thighs softly, watching as he pulled his lip between his teeth. Your left hand slowly, slowly crept upwards until it ghosted over the silky skin of his shaft, his body shuddering in response to your touch. You waited until his eyes were open again, watching you, before leaning forward and letting a pool of your saliva drip from your lips and onto his awaiting cock. He keened at the sight, his hips jerking just slightly as you finally wrapped your hand around the base and began to stroke him at a treacherously slow pace.
“Mierda. Fuck.”
He grunted quietly, trying to keep his hips still as you started to pump him a bit faster, glittering eyes staring up at him reverently. It was dizzying, the way you gazed up at him with such infatuation. It almost made him nauseous.
You slowly leaned down and licked the precum from his leaking slit before letting your lips wrap around the head, swirling your tongue languidly over the tip, watching his face scrunch up in pleasure.
You briefly pulled back to press kisses up along his entire length, coupled with soft caresses of your fingertips. It was clear to you that Jake was beginning to feel frustrated—his hands were buried in his hair, head thrown back against the bed as if attempting to subdue his desires.
You took him back into your mouth, working him slowly over with your tongue and swallowing him down bit by bit, agonizingly slow. You could feel Jake’s thighs tensing around you, his hands flying from his head to fist at the sheets on either side of his body.
When you gagged around his cock, he lost his composure. You made a startled choking sound when you felt his hand against the back of your head, pressing you down onto his length as his hips bucked up to try to sink into your throat. You immediately recoiled, and Jake nearly whined, his eyes desperately pleading with you to grant him some release. You weren’t taking any pleasure in seeing him like this—this wasn’t your end goal.
“You going to edge me like Marc, huh? Want to hear me beg?”
His voice broke off slightly, his frustrations venting through his lips as he almost glared at you. You sat up, moving to straddle his waist once more so you could press your lips to his again.
“No, Jake, I told you, I’m not. I just—Let me take care of you. Wanna show you how much you mean to me, wanna—wanna worship you, wanna make you feel good—”
His brows furrowed as you rambled slightly, your eyes big and round and glassy. He was confused—what exactly was it that you wanted from him?
“Let me fuck you, mi vida—make us both feel good with me inside you, hm?”
“No, Jake, just—hang on, that’s not—”
“Then what? Want to see if I can be as vanilla as your little Steven?”
“I want to make love with you, Jake.”
His breath resembled something of a gasp as his eyebrows shot up nearly to his hairline, disappearing beneath his curls while his eyes widened almost comically at your hasty confession. You cringed inwardly at your forwardness, taking in the expression of sheer panic on Jake’s face that had him looking like a deer in headlights. You sighed, leaning forward to press your forehead into his chest in an attempt to hide your face from view.
“Fuck. Sorry. I just—I don’t want you to feel like you have to rush through this. I’m sorry, I just—I want—want you to enjoy it, want you to let yourself feel it, Jake.”
You could feel his heart pounding against his ribcage, his lack of response smothering you after your fervent explanation. You wanted to disappear, wanted the ground to cave in and swallow you whole—instead, silence consumed you, settling across your back like a weight that you weren’t strong enough to carry.
“That’s...a new one for me.”
His voice was quiet, sheepish, and you could feel the vibrations rumbling in his chest as you lifted your head to look at him.
“I know.”
You acknowledged quietly. He was staring at you. Dark eyes searching within yours, scanning your expression, every detail of your face, as if attempting to see straight through you. Your heart was still pounding, your face rosy with an embarrassed blush—you felt his arms shift, his hand hesitantly lifting, fingers ghosting over the skin right above the waistband of your jeans at your hips, getting about as close as he could to holding you without actually touching you at all.
You’d never seen Jake Lockley at a loss for words before, and you’d certainly never seen him look so unsure. He was always so collected, nonchalant and unfazed, never dropping his guard for more than a second before that smug smirk reappeared on his face. He took things in stride, his confidence stifling as if he was always three steps ahead of the rest of the world, always knowing what came next.
But now there was vulnerability displayed across his slacken face, a certain wariness serrating his words as he spoke.
“I’m sorry, mi vida, but I don’t—”
“You don’t have to apologize, Jake, really, I promise it’s okay.”
You reached up a hand to cradle the side of his face, fingers gliding across the stubble of his jaw as your thumb brushed over his cheek. His head instinctually tilted in the direction of your hold, turning to press a soft kiss to the palm of your hand.
“I’m sorry. This—I don’t know what I was thinking. This isn’t fair to ask of you at all, it wasn’t a part of the deal, and—we can stop here. Let’s—just tell me where you wanna go from here and we can do it. Anything.”
You breathed, looking into his eyes, your brows furrowed in remorse as you anxiously awaited his reply. He was still just looking at you, unwavering, his chest heaving slightly with each brash exhale.
You felt his fingers skate up your bare spine and you straightened at his touch, letting him gently pull you towards him until your noses were brushing again. His gaze never left yours as he drank you in, his lips parting so you could feel his warm breath against yours. After a few more grueling beats, your pulse jumping with anticipation, his closed the gap and kissed you with a tenderness you didn’t know he even possessed. He pulled himself into a sitting position, wrapping his arms around you until they enveloped you completely, your bodies melding together as his tongue traced the seam of your mouth, although he didn’t press any further—just feeling you, tasting you, savoring the sweetness that seemed to course through your veins.
You were breathless when he pulled back, although he only recoiled just enough to speak. You could feel the movement of his lips against your face as his dark eyes burned through you.
“Hermosa, I don’t—I’ve never... Nunca he hecho esto antes.”
You knew what he was saying even if you couldn’t actually understand it. Your eyes crinkled at the corners as you smiled softly at him, sliding your palms over his chest before wrapping your arms tightly around his neck.
“It’s okay, honey. I—we can figure it out together.”
He blinked rapidly at you, and if you didn’t know any better, you might’ve thought there were tears shining across his eyes. But then he was kissing you again, so softly and sincerely that it fucking hurt.
Your body was slotted perfectly against his, flush against the contours of his current position as his hands slid up and down your spine, settling lowly on your back, just above your ass. You could feel his aching arousal pressing into your heat, rubbing against the seam of your jeans as he held you against him. You let his tongue lick inside your mouth greedily before you drew away.
“Can I—Can I keep going?”
You asked softly, grinding your clothed core up against him for emphasis. A breathy whimper fell from his lips as he closed his eyes, resting his forehead against yours for a moment before slowly nodding. You slowly crawled down the length of his body, pressing gentle kisses all the way down until you found yourself settled between his legs once again, not wasting any time in wrapping your hand around his cock and giving him a few gentle strokes. He sank into the mattress, throwing his head back into the pillows as his teeth sank into his bottom lip.
“You’re supposed to enjoy this, okay? But remember, this—this isn’t just about making each other cum, it’s—wanna make you feel good. We’ll take it nice and slow. You tell me when you’re ready to—when you wanna move on, and we will, okay?”
He looked down at you, his eyes still full of doubt and hesitance, but beneath the veneer you could see the warmth of trust shining through. He nodded at you reassuringly, and the soft smile he offered was one you’d never seen from him before—so genuine and credulous that it almost resembled Steven.
Without another word, you leaned forward and let the tip of your tongue trace the driblet of precome that had begun to slide down the length of his shaft. You wrapped your lips around the head of his cock, suckling at the flesh as your hand began to stroke him steadily, wrist twisting just slightly to maximize the stimulation.
Jake let you toy with him for awhile, his hands gripping the sheets on either side of him in tight fists while he endured you doting on his throbbing cock.
When you reached to squeeze for his balls, your head sinking a bit lower onto his length, you felt his fingers wrap in your hair and gently coax you off of him, a low growl rumbling in his chest. You immediately ceased your ministrations, staring up at him attentively as he blinked slowly at you, his lip swollen from where he had been biting it.
“Do you—you want me to stop? Wanna—want me to ride you, or—”
He interrupted you with groan, throwing his head back against the pillows and squeezing his eyes shut. You could feel the muscles of his abdomen rippling.
“No, mi vida, it’s alright, whenever—you can stay down there as long as you like, I just—mierda, your mouth is so good to me, hermosa. Worried I’m gonna cum.”
He confessed, a sort of pained expression on his face. You gave him a pitying look—it wasn’t mocking, not at all, but genuine sympathy. You didn’t want to make him miserable.
“Just a little bit longer, okay, honey? I know it’s hard going so slow, I’m sorry, but—but I promise, when you finally let go, it’ll be worth it, okay?”
He smiled meekly at you, nodding as he removed his hand from your hair and returned it to its position tangled in the sheets at his side. You gave him one last reassuring glance before sinking your mouth back down onto his cock and lavishing him with more attention.
For several more minutes, he let you worship him, his hips jolting and cock twitching, although he was displaying great levels of restraint when it came to letting you dictate the speed and pace of your actions. You suckled one of his balls into your mouth, watching as he squirmed, legs kicking just slightly beside you as he mewled, his face scrunched up in pleasure.
You released him with a popping sound, finally satisfied with how you’d worked him up and extolled his cock. You crawled up his body and he eagerly welcomed your proximity, pulling you to his mouth to plant a hard, desperate kiss to your mouth. You smiled into him, fingers nestled in his curls.
“Thank you, Jake, did so well.”
You whispered, pressing gentle kisses to the expanse of his jaw as his chest heaved beneath you. He hummed to acknowledge your praise, although you could feel the tension in his muscles as he impatiently awaited your signal that you could continue.
When your eyes met his, they blinked at him, docile and alluring, and he took that as his cue to roll you onto your back so he could position himself on top of you. He pressed a few kisses to your mouth, as if he was struggling to pull himself away, before his lips traveled down your neck and collarbone, his hands popping the button on your jeans to finally have you bare beneath him. You didn’t protest when he pulled them down off of you, your panties joining them soon after. He leaned up to kiss you again, his rock-hard length dipping into your sopping folds as his body rocked against yours once, then twice, earning a low whimper from your throat.
“Go ahead, honey, I’m ready for you.”
You whispered, voice sweet, and he groaned lowly. However, he surprised you by pressing a soft peck to your cheek before sinking down the length of your body, his mouth trailing a line down the center of your torso before kissing right atop your pubic bone, brown eyes watching you closely. Your breath stuttered as you wrapped your fingers in his hair unconsciously.
“Jake, you’ve waited long enough, you don’t have to—”
“Wanna do this right, Y/N.”
He whispered, leaning forward to place a gentle kiss on your clit, causing you to gasp.
“Make me feel so good, hermosa. Promised going slow is worth it—gonna make it worth it for you, too.”
You couldn’t dwell on the fluttering sensation in your chest when his mouth pressed against you, wet tongue meeting your dripping folds with attentiveness—you released a soft cry as he lapped at your entranced, the tip of his tongue prodding at your clit gently, causing you to squirm.
Jake liked to run his mouth, but now, he was silent. It's not that he didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to spur you on with filthy praise—he simply couldn’t find the words. He was absolutely hypnotized by the sight above him, bewitched by the expression of pure, unadulterated euphoria on your face at each ministration he offered. He’d never been witness to such a beautiful view before—any time he’d gone down on someone, watching their nonverbal responses to his touch simply wasn’t his priority. It had always been rushed, forceful, as he ripped orgasm after orgasm from his partner with greed and insatiability. But now—now it was you. He was in between your legs, pulling angelic sounds from your lips as your thighs quaked around his head. You were glowing, radiant, ethereal as you basked in the pleasure, and Jake finally realized why foreplay was so important—seeing you like this might be even better than the real thing.
He heeded your words. He wasn’t trying to make you cum, wasn’t speeding you towards your climax with rapid swipes of his tongue and fingers. He was savoring you, each brush of his mouth against your core was languid and indulgent. His lips puckered around your sensitive bundle of nerves, drawing slow circles around it with his tongue as your fingers fisted tighter into his curls, offering enough of a sting to make him groan around you. His tongue dipped into your entrance, lapping at your dripping arousal, your walls fluttering around his thick muscle as your hips jerked to meet his thrusts, pressing yourself against his face to chase your mounting pleasure.
This was different than the orgasms he’d granted you the day prior—this was a simmering heat, coiling lowly in your stomach, festering and building slowly as he sought out the places that made you squirm. You could feel the intensity spiking, even though his lazy speed remained constant—the way his dark eyes stayed firmly fixated on your face was dragging you closer and closer to the threshold.
“Fuck, Jake, oh God—”
You whined, and his hands slipped beneath your ass, lifting your hips to grant him a better angle at which to devour you. Your thighs were trembling, his tongue beginning to swipe over your clit in rapid side-to-side motions—the change of pace pulled a ragged wail from within you, the muscles of your abdomen squeezing tight. He couldn’t control the shameful rutting of his hips into the mattress beneath him at the sound.
“So close, Jake, yes, fuck—”
You were right on the precipice, stars clouding your vision, but right before you tipped over the edge, you yanked your hips back, lifting Jake's head away from you with your grip on his hair. He jolted, hazy eyes suddenly wide and alert as he sat back, bewildered at your abrupt departure from his lips. You squeezed your eyes shut as your orgasm dissipated, your tense muscles sinking back into the mattress as the coil loosened itself. You breathed out lowly, your lashes fluttering as you opened your arms to pull Jake against you.
“Sorry, honey, I—so good, Jake, fuck, but I—wanna cum on your cock, wanna cum with you.”
A low groan escaped him as he pressed his forehead to yours, eyes blinking closed to stave off the arousal that was singeing his insides.
“You—¿estás lista, mi vida? Are you sure?”
You nodded vigorously, pressing a kiss to his lips, and he let out a slow breath, hands sliding to your sides. Your brows furrowed when he pulled back, gently attempting to roll you onto your stomach. You reached up to grip his shoulders tightly, shaking your head.
“No, no, Jake, I want—wanna see you, wanna be close to you, please.”
There was turmoil churning behind his eyes as he stared down at you, brows furrowed heavily as he fought his internal battle. You realized he’d probably never done it like this before—if the fact that he was afraid to kiss you was any indication, you wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he’d never let himself be caught in such an intimate position.
But then his eyes softened, his hand coming to cradle the side of your face, his thumb pressing up against the swell of your lower lip.
“Okay, hermosa. Por ti hago lo que sea.”
You felt his member slide between your dripping folds, the head of his cock brushing across your clit as he guided it against your center, hearing the way your breath hitched at the feel of him over your bundle of nerves. You felt it notch at your entrance, the tip just barely breaching your folds. Jake cursed lowly under his breath, eyes glued to where his cock was about to sink into you. In spite of your desperation, your hands lifted to rest on either side of his face, forcing his eyes onto you.
“Look at me, honey. Want you to look at me when you split me open.”
“Carajo.”
He muttered, closing his eyes to steel himself before opening them again to stare into yours. You watched his lips part as he pushed into you, unbearably slow, a low moan rumbling through his diaphragm as he sank into you, only stopping when he was fully-seated within your fluttering walls.
The intimacy was stifling him. He felt lightheaded, breathless, his body hovering over yours just barely as he held himself up above you, drinking in your heavenly being—your hair was fanned out on the pillow beneath you, your pink lips slicked with saliva as your gazed up at him with doe-eyes, blinking slowly as your walls clenched around him.
“God, Jake.”
You whispered, arms wrapping around his neck and pulling so he fell against you, chest flush against your own. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, staying still inside of you for a few brief moments in order to just feel the way you surrounded him.
Slowly, carefully, he pulled back his hips, just barely, before pressing back inside of you, your moans echoing in unison as his balls nestled tightly against your ass again. He’d always been so busy chasing his release, relentlessly pounding into you that he hadn’t taken the time to appreciate just how perfectly he filled you, just how perfectly your walls clamped around his pulsing length.
“So good, mi vida.”
He groaned against your neck, repeating the motion of his hips at a more steady pace. Each thrust pressed against your cervix, causing you to whimper.
“Fill me up so nice, Jake, fuck, feels so good.”
He felt your walls clamp around him once more, and he pulled his head back slightly, lifting himself up a bit more so he could increase the breadth of his thrusts.
“Me vas a matar.”
He growled, sucking in a breath through his teeth as one hand came to palm at your breast, his eyes glued to the way the other bounced with each push of his hips forward. His eyes drifted back to the fucked-out expression on your face, your lips parted as you stared up at him, and his hips stuttered just slightly.
God, he was close already.
“Fuck, hermosa, me arruinas.”
You could feel him faltering, a bead of sweat dripping from one of his curls and down onto your chest, sliding between your breasts and down to your stomach. He watched it dribble downward, eyes dazed, his abdomen clenching as he attempted to stave off his impending orgasm.
His hand clumsily wedged between your bodies, fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in crude circles, his arm trembling just slightly. Watching him grow desperate above you was enough to spark the beginnings of your climax. You pulled him down for a bruising kiss, teeth clashing and tongues swirling as you swallowed his incessant groans.
“Wan’ you to cum with me, Jake.”
Your words were drawled, drunk on the way his cock filled you, and you could feel pleasure sparking in the base of your spine. The speed of his fingers on your clit sped up slightly, his hips struggling to maintain their cadence.
“Mierda, hermosa, oh fuck, so tight—can’t, I can’t—”
“Cum inside me, Jake.”
Your words were only a whisper as you skated along the edge of your orgasm, just barely hanging on as you desperately tried to convince Jake to let go. His eyes blew open wide at your words, grunting as his hips continued jacking forward.
“Y/N, shit, don’t—I’ve never—”
“Oh, God, fuck, I’m cumming, Jake, please, please cum with me, fuck—”
He couldn’t have stopped himself even if he tried. The rhythmic pulsing of your walls around his painfully hard cock was harrowing, gripping him so tightly that he couldn’t have pulled out even if he wanted to.
His balls drew up tight as his climax exploded.
“Oh, me vengo—mierda, fuck, fuck, fuck, I’m cumming, shit, shit, shit—”
His eyes rolled back as he nearly collapsed on top of you, his hips pistoning forward again and again as he shot his spend deep into your walls, his cock pulsing. His orgasm seemed to last minutes as his vision blacked out, brain emptying as his awareness only focused on how the pleasure zipped across his skin with each pump of cum that he released and how tightly your walls were squeezing him, milking him for all he was worth. He’d never cum so hard in his life, or so much—his seed was leaking out around his length as his body slowed to a halt, your tired cunt stuffed full of him as his cock spilled one final spurt of warm release, the head of his member settling against your cervix as he stilled, his weight bearing down on you as he went boneless.
Jake was slowly grounded back into reality at the feeling of your fingertips brushing softly across the length of his spine, your other hand buried in his curls from where his face was tucked into your shoulder. He could feel your hot lips pressed against his temple, your breathing steady and even as you regained your bearings. He forced himself to follow your inhalation patterns, attempting to slow the racing of his heart.
As the endorphins flooding his bloodstream began to thin out, his anxieties threatened to consume him once again. He pushed himself up and off of you, groaning at the soreness in his muscles and the exhaustion tingeing the edge of his movements. You could do nothing but watch him as he slowly pulled out of you, and you expected him to leave you as hastily as he had the day before—maybe he would’ve, if not for the way his eyes glued themselves to your exposed center, enthralled by the sight of his cum oozing from your fluttering hole and dripping downwards.
Your hips jumped slightly when you felt his fingers gently sweep over your cunt—his gaze never lifted as he scooped his release from where is was beginning to escape and pushed it back into you, forcing you to keep as much of him inside as you could. His eyes were dark, possessive as he tilted your hips up just slightly in an effort to stop his cum from leaking out of you.
His sudden captivation and obsession with filling you was surprising, a stark contrast from just moments before when he had desperately resisted your pleas to finish inside of you. The ghost of a smile flickered over his lips as he settled you back down, seemingly content with the show. His eyes flickered up to yours, and as soon as your gazes met, you saw the way a shadow crested his features, abruptly throwing up his guard after the unexpected vulnerability he’d just granted you.
Jake walked to the bathroom, letting the door shut behind him with a click. You pulled yourself into a sitting position, sighing as you felt the stickiness between your thighs and settling beneath you. You should clean yourself up, get dressed and head out so that—
The bathroom door swung open again and Jake walked out, a wet washcloth awkwardly held in his left hand. He stood at the end of the bed for a moment, as if unsure of what to do next. His eyes hesitantly found yours.
“Do—I’m—I haven’t done this part before, mi vida.”
He quietly admitted, offering a sheepish shrug of his shoulders. Still, your heart warmed at his efforts.
“Thought—figured I’d try what Marc does, but I don’t—”
“Thank you, Jake, that’s perfect.”
You encouraged softly, and his eyes lit up with your soft praises as he knelt down on the edge of the bed, leaning down to carefully press the cloth to your ruined core. You sucked in a sharp breath, the coldness of the water a foreign sensation in contrast to the heat that was broiling between your legs—Jake recoiled, eyes searching yours widely for direction. You offered him a lopsided grin.
“Sorry, s’just—sensitive.”
You explained, and he nodded, slowly wiping at the arousal that stained your skin. His lips were pursed as he focused on his actions, trying desperately not to hurt you. After awhile, he sighed.
“Would you—do you want Marc? Or Steven?”
Your face fell as he finished cleaning you up, tossing the towel on the floor beside the bed, before facing you, his curls falling across his forehead and into his eyes. You frowned.
“No, Jake—not unless you don’t want to—it’s okay, I can always leave if that’s—”
He let out a humorless, bitter laugh, one hand coming up to stroke at his stubbled jaw as he stared at the ceiling, clearly uncomfortable.
“No sé lo que estoy haciendo.”
You heard him mumble breathlessly, his shoulders sagging with defeat.
“Do you—will you come lay with me, Jake?”
You asked softly, as if you were speaking to a wild animal and were trying desperately not to scare it away. His eyes darted to your face, lips parting to protest, to make up an excuse, but then he shook his head at himself, crawling up towards you and seating himself beside you, his back resting against the headboard. You tentatively leaned into his side, nestling your head against his shoulder. You felt him stiffen beside you slightly, but then his arm moved to wrap around you, pulling you closer against his side.
You felt him release a breath he’d been holding as you lifted a hand to rest on his bare chest, drawing random shapes into the warm skin mindlessly.
“Why did you think I’d want Marc or Steven?”
You asked softly, your eyes watching the movement of your fingers on his chest. His hold on you tightened.
“This—s’not my job. I don’t do things like this.”
You sat upright, turning to face him fully. His eyes were hard as they looked at you.
“What do you mean, not your job?”
His lips pursed.
“You know, hermosa. You’re the doctor, hm? Steven and me, we’re—we both do something for Marc. S’why we’re here. Marc and Steven, they—they get to feel things, know people. I’m—I’m just here to make sure they’re safe, that they don’t get hurt.”
Tears pricked behind your eyes as his words registered in your brain. There was an aching sensation festering in your chest.
“No, Jake, that’s not—that’s not how this works. You’re a person, you have every right to experience things just like they do, you’re—”
“No pasa nada. This is the way things are, hermosa. I know you thought—thought you’d be able to come and figure us out, show us what’s what, but—but I already know who I am, what part I play.”
The dejection in his voice was unmistakable. There was bitterness in his words, resentment. The pain in your chest expanded.
“I protect. That’s what I do. Means I don’t get—I don’t get to have this, mi vida. What happened today—that’t not mine.”
A tear rolled down your cheek, so you turned and sank back into his side, hoping he didn’t catch your display of emotion. In spite of himself, he let you press against him, savoring the feeling of your soft skin against his own.
You were hoping he’d open himself up to you after your intimate tryst, but you obviously misread the situation—his walls had come back up, even stronger and more unwavering than before.
Perhaps he sensed your sadness. You felt him release a long sigh, his muscles going lax as he let his head fall against the headboard.
“Lo siento, hermosa. I—you deserve better than what I can give you.”
Your head turned to gaze up at him, finding his eyes staring straight ahead at a random focal point. You felt your heart crack a bit.
“Stop, Jake, don’t say that. That’s not true, I don’t—”
“It’s okay, mi vida. I appreciate what you tried to do for me today. Significa mucho para mí.”
He swallowed, and when he finally looked down at you, the warmth he’d been unabashedly displaying for you had been replaced by the familiar austere glint that normally resided there.
No. You wouldn’t have it. Not after all of this.
Your hand reached up to cradle his jaw, thumb swiping over the apple of his cheek as you turned his head to face you.
“I know you’ve heard me say it, Jake. To Marc and Steven. This wasn’t—this isn’t just research.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed in his throat as his eyes flickered down to your lips, and you felt the arm that was wrapped around you tighten its grip again.
“I care about you, a lot—”
“You don’t know me.”
His words were brazen, suddenly harsh, insistent against your admission. Your brows furrowed.
“I’m not—I’m not like the others. I’m—I’m no good, hermosa. You care about Steven, and Marc, but I’m not like them. I don’t feel things like them, I can’t—estás mejor sin mí.”
“Then let me know you, Jake. You’re a part of this system, just as much as Marc and Steven, and you deserve to be happy.”
He didn’t answer you—his jaw rippled at the conviction your tone offered, so certain with yourself. You let out a long sigh, reaching to pull at his arm as you shifted. His brows furrowed, but he let you coax him into a lying position, his head against the pillows as you once again nestled into his side, arms wrapped tightly around his torso as you pressed your front against his side, face squished against his shoulder. You placed a soft kiss to the skin there.
“I’m gonna stay with you tonight, okay, Jake?”
You felt his muscles tense in protest, every fiber of his being telling him to make you leave, to get up and go, but the proximity and warmth of your body was intoxicating. After a few beats, he finally offered a slow nod, his limbs relaxing as he sank into the bed. You reached to pull the duvet over you two, clutching onto him tightly, and even if he refused to hold you back, you could feel the way his body went pliant beneath your touch.
He shouldn’t let you so close. He’d managed to keep his distance before—but with the way your breaths slowed into gentle snores, your hair tickling against his bicep, your comforting heat seeping into his bones—he felt his resolve begin to crack beneath the pressure of your insistent affections.
Jake let himself mold against you, his head tilting to rest against the top of yours as he pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of your head—he told himself that it was okay, you were sleeping, no one ever had to know just how much you’d softened him, how deeply you’d sunk your perfectly-manicured nails into his flesh—and no one ever had to know just how much he loved it.
For the first time in what felt like ever, Jake Lockley actually slept.
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