#it's melancholy if i let myself think about how we'll never talk again but they're actually funny now👍
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good news everyone it does get better at least a little and after thinking about it i'm not quite as miserable or in despair as i thought i was.
#i'm about to overshare in the tags ok👍#our post comrade.#--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------#just discovered that it doesn't make me mad or miserable anymore to look at my ex's old texts#it's melancholy if i let myself think about how we'll never talk again but they're actually funny now👍#i feel much better all of a sudden#i don't hate them as much as i thought i did. and more importantly i don't hate myself as much as i thought i did 👍#i guess we were really just two goofy and struggling teenagers#and i guess we were best friends for a reason#did you guys know we were tumblr mutuals. i never told you that#that was way before this blog. they were the reason i migrated to instagram#👍‼️ if you're wondering why i went back to look it's because i wanted to find the logs of me infodumping about rea/icide for my amusement#they said dar was pretty. that's so funny#and i agreed much too enthusiastically. completely unsubtle#and i talked about how i was changing my name to parme and how happy it made me#i didn't remember that part. i wasn't even officially nonbinary at that point#:).#i can't write about this in my diary sorry it would out me. so it goes here
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