#it's fine he's probably helping Kieran find room mates and get a job and doing his laundry still | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

arcadiasarchives · 4 years ago

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The Choices We Make

Did I fill one of my own prompts? Probably. At least I’ve actually finished something. This was actually finished a little while ago, before I went into Lockdown but I’ve been waiting for the person I wrote it for to read it before posting.

University was turning out to be a lot more fun than Killian had expected. His lessons were interesting, the teachers cool, and he’d begun making friends for the first time in what felt like forever. He was finally out of the house as well, having found a classmate to share his place with to help cover costs, and it felt good to be away from his brother no matter how much he loved him. It turned out that love didn’t stop you from wanting to punch people in the face. Fancy that. He had the flat to himself that night, Nicolai had a tutoring job at the library, and he was using the quiet to get as much of his homework as possible out of the way. If he got it done before the weekend he’d just be able to kick back and relax, maybe have a few friends round. But that was only if he got his homework out of the way because as cool as his teachers were some of them were right demons, literally. He’d been working for hours, music on low in the background, and was just considering stopping to eat something when he heard the window open. It should probably worry him considering they were on the 5th floor but he had a pretty good idea who it was. And if it wasn’t them, well worry wasn’t going to help anyway. He glanced at his visitor’s reflection in the glass of his picture frame, shaking his head with a small sigh. “You realise who they are don’t you?” It wasn’t a question not really and he wondered briefly if he’d get away with not answering. Though if that was the case his brother would have just sent a text rather than breaking into his flat at stupid o'clock. And really, he had a key. “Of course I do, now would you mind shutting that window it’s cold out.” He heard the window shut and his brother’s footsteps move closer to the desk. Sighing he set aside his homework and turned to give the other his full attention. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been expecting this after agreeing to be the villain’s brother’s room-mate. But he certainly wasn’t going to be made to regret the decision, not even by Kieran. “Is that all you have to say?” Kieran’s voice was a little harder than Killian had been expecting and he frowned. He was willing to entertain his brother’s misgivings certainly, especially as he’d been nice enough to come while Nicolai was out though whether that was intentional or accidental was anyone’s guess. But he drew the line at being treated like a reprobate child. Pushing away from his desk he gave his brother a once over before getting up and heading into the kitchenette. “Pretty much yeah, coffee?” He started the machine anyway, Kieran had quite obviously stopped by after patrol and caffeine might put him in a slightly better mood. Stifling a yawn with the back of his hand he ignored the clock on the wall that clearly said he was pushing his luck when it came to sleep and opened the fridge. There wasn’t much that didn’t require cooking, which to be honest he couldn’t be bothered with, so he grabbed an apple of the counter instead. Kieran had followed after him and was now leaning against the breakfast bar, frown still firmly in place. “Please tell me that’s not your dinner?” He said as he watched his brother bite into the apple. “It’s not my dinner.” Kieran shook his head with a frustrated sigh, he wasn’t fooled by Killian’s innocent smile but he had other things to focus on for the time being. He could bitch about his brother’s poor eating habits later. “It’s dangerous for you to live here.” Killian sighed, he’d been hoping against hope that they’d drop the subject. “No more dangerous than me living back home, I’d wager.” Kieran flinched at that and Killian felt momentarily guilty, after all, he hadn’t meant to imply it was Kieran’s fault. But what else could he say? Unlike him Nicolai had no idea who Killian was, Kieran’s identity was still largely a secret and he’d done everything in his power to keep Killian off everyone’s radar even his own people for a while. Whereas Nicolai’s siblings had never cared about hiding their identity or protecting him. It had made him a target, if not of violence then of suspicion and fear, Killian refused to be a part of that. They’d been pushed together by one of their teachers during the first week of class. Neither of them had any connections in the class and hadn’t really made any effort to find a work partner when prompted. So she’d done it for them. Nicolai had been nothing but upfront about who and what he was and when Killian had told him it didn’t matter he’d meant it. Kieran’s opinions be damned. He placed one of the two coffee’s the machine had made in front of his brother and lent against the other side of the counter. “You were safe there, even if everything’s discovered. What happens if everything is revealed now?” Kieran demanded thinking of all the contingency plans he’d put in place over the years. Even before he’d trusted Marcus enough with his secrets he’d made sure Killian would be safe. “I’ll be more careful, I’m already more careful, it really doesn’t change anything.” The entire place was warded, he and Nicolai had spent hours at it, not to mention the security system they’d put in. This place was just as safe as the house was. “Your room-mate changes everything!” Several things in the kitchen shook and Killian glared, his own temper rising. “You don’t know anything about him.” And he really did try to keep his voice calm but there was no mistaking the edge it had taken. “You can’t just make assumptions like that.” Kieran snorted. “What makes you think he’s all that different from his siblings, you really expect me to believe one of that family turned out decent?” Killian opened his mouth, closed it, took a deep breath and opened it again. “I’m not sure we’re in a position to be criticising peoples family background do you?” It was the safest thing he could think of saying but it still made Kieran slam his mouth shut with an audible click of teeth. They didn’t talk about their family history, through some sort of unspoken agreement none of the decent side of the family did. But not talking about something and hinting at its existence were two very different things in Killian’s opinion. “Maybe not but it certainly gives me reason to doubt his motives.” “Jesus I’m not going to ask why you’re so paranoid, because I know and I get it I really do, but there’s legitimately no way Nicky could have ulterior motives to getting a place with me. As far as he’s concerned I’m just another student.” Unless you know something I don’t Killian mentally added but he didn’t say it out loud. He wasn’t about to accuse the other of keeping things from him and he didn’t believe Nicolai would do such a thing anyway. “Fine let’s say I accept that he has no idea, what about when he finds out? Or if you trust him that much what about when his siblings find out?” “What’s that supposed to mean?” “You can’t really believe he’ll stand up to them for you? Why wouldn’t he just hand you over?” Because it’s wrong he thought angrily but Kieran was unlikely to accept that as anything but deflection. He took a deep breath and suddenly he didn’t care if he upset his brother he just wanted this all over with. “You shouldn’t hold everyone to your own standards,” Killian spat ignoring the was his cup trembled. He had himself under control, hopefully, the same could be said for Kieran. “Some people obviously have better morals.” It seemed to take a minute for the words to compute but then Kieran’s cup exploded. Maybe Killian should suggest to Marcus that they start practising calming techniques again. Not that he was probably going to be seeing him for a while. “Are you saying that I-” “Well, you’re the one pushing it so-” “Because I’m worried about you I can’t believe-” “No! Being worried is one thing but this is-” “Just because you’re too stupid to consider- “Oh, so I’m stupid now am- “You’re certainly acting like it! You have to see it’s not safe-” “I don’t see anything except your prejudice and-” Their shouting was stopped by the front door opening and Killian quickly tried to reign his temper in, glaring at his brother in warning as Nicolai looked between them from the door. He looked exhausted, not just physically but mentally and Killian wondered how much of their argument he’d heard. “Sorry, I can-” He started but Killian was quick to cut him off. “No it’s fine, Kieran was just leaving anyway.” The look his brother gave him made something inside Killian hurt but he didn’t argue, barely even looked over as he headed out, brushing past Nicolai with a quiet ‘night’. Killian slumped back against the counter, staring at the shards of glass and slowly spreading coffee. At some stage, during their argument, the other cup had been destroyed as well and there were a few things on the floor, though nothing looked broken thankfully. He should start cleaning up but he couldn’t make himself move. Something was placed on the counter beside him and he turned to look at Nicolai as he leaned beside him. “I picked up dinner on my way back, didn’t think you’d have stopped your essays.” Nicolai’s voice was soft and careful, he expected that if his friend didn’t have a headache it wouldn’t be far off and he didn’t want to risk making it worse. “Yeah, I was almost finished when...” He trailed off unsure exactly how to continue before shaking his head slightly. “I should clear up.” “I’ll do it, go set the food at the coffee table.” “But-” “It’ll take me less time than it will you in this state.” He wasn’t wrong, Killian had been planning on clearing up by hand which considering they were short on cups probably wasn’t the wisest decision anyway. So he picked up the bags of take-out and headed into the main room. Nicolai had joined him before he’d finished setting out the cartons and he slumped down onto the sofa beside him, holding out a bottle of beer which Killian accepted gratefully. They didn’t usually drink on a class night but as he clinked his bottle to Nicolai’s he felt they both deserved it. While Killian lent forward to grab some food Nicolai turned the tv on to a random channel. It was barely loud enough to hear but it had been their ritual from the start, both used to plenty of noise. They’d been eating for a little while when Nicolai spoke. “I’m sorry.” “Don’t be,” Killian said through a mouthful of food before quickly swallowing. “It’s not your fault.” “Would you have been fighting with him had you not been living here?” “Probably,” Killian said with a shrug he was always fighting with his brother after all. “As badly?” Nicolai pressed smiling slightly at Killian’s annoyed huff before stealing some of his food. “You have to admit I’m a defining factor.” “Perhaps,” Killian agreed as he stole half a spring roll off the other’s plate. “But that’s his problem, not yours.” “I don’t like the idea of ruining your relationship with your brother,” Nicolai said quietly and Killian smiled, nudging his friend gently. “You won’t ruin it I promise, he’ll cool off and we’ll talk like adults when we’re not both so tired. He’ll come around he just needs some time.” Killian refused to dwell on how long it might actually take. They’d gone months without speaking to each other while living in the same house, now who knew how long it would last. But they’d get there eventually even if it took Jasper and Marcus smacking them round the head come Christmas.

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