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silcoseye · 3 years ago

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Volatile: P5: Vaulting Ambition

info: "It's been years since Silco, Vander and (Y/N) split up. When Silco searches for his old friend again, asking them to help him teach a child he had recently taken in their 'explosive' craft, their feelings for him are reignited. The question remains if he burns for them just as bright as they do."

thanks for continuing to read this fic even if I make huge breaks between chapters ;-; it's a lot of work heheh. One of my close friends did offer to edit for me but I'm too much of a perfectionist and would still want to go through it in case i wanted to add anything else. i have 3 more chapters planned and perhaps some inbetweens if i feel like it/am given suggestions. all i can say is I'm hoping you enjoy this one and I'm so excited to start work on ch 6!! enjoy simps <3

warnings: gender-neutral reader, starts soft, turns to angst, negative self image/self doubt and self depreciation- reader having a negative mindset, mentions of death, mentions of police brutality, violence, knives, cliffhanger ending hahaha.... plz forgive me

5792 words

When you arrived home from 'The Last Drop' you blinked in confusion as a courier set a parcel down in front of your door and rang the bell. Quickly moving to them, your keys jingling in hand, you let them know you lived there and took the box from them, bringing it into your home and locking your door behind you. Curiously, you set your bag down, hand skimming over your neatly written name and address on the brown paper wrapping it- in Silco's writing. You kneeled on the floor in front of your coffee table, tearing the paper apart and finding a smooth box inside, as well as your letter in neat handwriting. Silco's again.

I'll see you later today. Enjoy the gift. That's is all it said, and your eyes widened as you lifted the lid off the box, eyes scanning over the very fancy clothing inside. You pulled it out delicately, eyes darting over the article. It wasn't something that reminded you of Piltover's fashion; the patterns were neatly stitched together yet mismatched, but the red and black colour scheme with hints of gold along the seems and details stuck out to you. Silco's colours. You recoiled slightly, dropping it self-consciously back in the box and sitting back on your haunches.

What was this? Why was he giving you gifts, being so nice to you? It was very unlike him. He had told you he would get you anything you wanted and required- all you had asked him for so far was to help you with your job of educating Jinx: equipment once it got damaged from frequent use; chemical refills and top-ups; notebooks; metal and metal parts. Nothing personal. Maybe this was his way of saying he was impatient in waiting for your request? Maybe he was subtly claiming you as his own...

What was this all for? Having your own feelings for him reciprocated this much was alien. And his dubious intentions muddled your mind even more. It almost pushed you over the edge, made you want to cower away and hide from him. Millions of questions flooded your brain at once, but the main one that struck out was: Where in the stars was he going to take you?

You looked back at the clothing in the box that had been recklessly placed back. Gingerly, you reached a hand to stroke the material as if it were a skittish cat. Smooth, expensive, strange- unfamiliar. Should you just tell him you can't go tonight? Something else came up? You realised you had a project left unfinished that couldn't wait? You got distracted? The latter seemed more plausible but he'd likely just find you in your home and persuade you to follow him anyway. There really was no use in hiding.

To be true, you did want to see him today, but this outfit... He must have spent good money on it. It would be a shame if you never wore it... Would it even fit? How did he even know your measurements? You should likely just give it back to him, if you end up going later today. Or at another time? Or not at all? Should you eat before you go- if you go? Oh stars, was it another restaurant? Would this one be full of people? Would they all stare at the two of you? You didn't even know what you'd order. What if you picked something so foreign and disgusting you couldn't eat it and embarrass yourself? What if your nerves made you too anxious and nauseous to eat? Would he be concerned?

You felt the urge to just crumple to the floor and weep until you noticed another note that you missed. Perhaps it was hidden in the clothing and had fallen out as you picked it up. This was also written in Silco's handwriting. You read:

Stop stressing and wear it. Don't even think about returning it. I'm really looking forward to seeing you.

You felt your face flush with warmth, your cheeks filling with crimson and a small squeak slipping out of your lips- you quickly pressed your hands to your face to hide. You lay back on the floor, clutching the note against your chest. Stars Silco was...

"Mindreader," You muttered to yourself, feeling the edges of your lips turning up in a smile.

Fine.

If he wanted to see you so badly, you just had to put on your bravest face and ignore your rapid heartbeat. Slowly raising yourself from the floor, you picked up the box. Making a quick detour to the kitchen, you ate a snack and went to get ready, doing your usual skincare routine and brushing your teeth. You laid out the outfit on your bed and smoothed it down, inspecting it once again. With a nervous sigh, you picked it up, holding it against your body and glancing in the mirror. The measurements appeared correct. Perhaps this outfit would fit... And not look too bad.

In fact, it was possible you looked amazing. You shamelessly raked your eyes over your body and smiled in satisfaction. Silco did always have good taste and was well dressed, you shouldn't expect anything less really. You sat down to finish getting ready- styling your hair, putting on makeup that you deemed necessary. Soon, it was time for you to leave.

You had your reservations about walking through the streets of Zaun in such expensive clothing- without the terrifying reputation Silco built for himself over the years, you were just a person in a fancy outfit. You prayed to the stars above no one would stop you or rob you of the keys and the pouch of coins you carried in the fairly deep pockets.

The doors of the empty 'Last Drop' swung shut behind you as you looked around the almost empty establishment. The bartender was the only one there, meticulously cleaning glasses. He was unfamiliar to you- a replacement you guessed. You wondered what had happened to the previous bartender- had they done something wrong?

"Hey," You called his attention, startling the boy so much he almost clumsily dropped the glass. You winced as you stopped infront of the bar, hands finding your pockets and fingers grazing over the cool metal and soft pouch, "You're new here, aren't you?" You asked, and he nodded,

"J-Just training," He said, "Did you want something uhm- I can get you ah..." he didn't finish the sentence, words dying on his tongue as he just stared at you. Tilting your head to the side you waited a moment for him to finish, collect himself, but the boy just stared. Realising the silence was now certainly uncomfortable, you spoke up,

"Where's Silco?" you bluntly asked the shocked boy. He shakily pointed to the stairs, and you nodded easily stepping over the staff blockade,

"Y-You look great!" Your head spun to look at the boy, who seemed to cower slightly away from your curious gaze. With a small smile, you nodded, thanked him, and resumed your journey upstairs, hands smoothing over the outfit in a small proud smile.

You tapped your knuckles to the door gently and pushed it open at the tired 'come in' you heard from within. The smell of smoke hit you first; the room was cloudy, full of it. A lit cigar, perched between Silco's thin lips, was the source, the end burning bright orange as he inhaled, his form partially obscured. More smoke emanated from his mouth, and as you focused on his eyes, you watched his posture straighten, leaning against the back of the chair. His lips tugged themselves into a small satisfied smile behind the curtain of smoke as you shut the door behind yourself and put your arms out, turning from side to side as you crossed the room in a strange but playful dance, showing off the outfit. You came to a halt a few feet before his desk, arms falling to your sides and sliding up to find the pockets,

"Well well... I won't lie, I am surprised you put it on," his smile widened ever so slightly at your mock glare, "Don't blame me," He said, taking a final inhale of the cigar and dropping it into his ashtray, decorated by Jinx, "I know your nature is to reject any nice gift given to you. I'm glad you are wearing it though. You look good," Your own smile widened at the compliment, and you hoped he thought the blush dusting your cheeks was from the makeup and not your foolish happiness,

"Thanks for adding the pockets," You responded, trying to be smooth and confident, moving your exposed thumbs slightly and glancing down at them, "They were the main selling point to this whole outfit," You told him, eliciting a hum and gentle chuckle. He ran a hand over his hair, a few strands falling onto his forehead from where they were originally styled,

"Have you seen the inside ones?" you looked at him confused, "The pockets on the inside," He restated,

"There are pockets inside?" you gaped, making him shake his head slightly with an amused chuckle,

"My dear, you'd think I'd outfit you in a custom piece with no place for you to conceal a weapon?" He raised a brow, and you blinked, taken aback by his use of the term of endearment, "I may have this small luxury now, but I'm very aware the streets of Zaun are still violent," He chastised, standing and rounding the desk. He stopped in front of you, holding your gaze for a moment.

Suddenly, you became very distracted by the feeling of his hands against your front, undoing the buttons and holding one side of the outfit, showing you the empty pockets. You blinked, admiring his long fingers and relishing in the feeling of them pressing against you. Your heartbeat pounded loudly in your chest and quickly filled your ears almost in anticipation. With a dry swallow, you nodded in recognition and turned to meet his gaze. Searching his bi-coloured eyes for a moment, you found them unreadable- even his human one. If there was an emotion in them, it was one so foreign to you, you couldn't interpret it. With a nervous laugh, you tilted your head and broke the intense eye contact, before giving him a pleasant smile,

"Thanks for showing me. Without you, I wouldn't know they were... there" You said, still cheerful, even in your low tone, "Thank you again- it's a beautiful outfit and I don't know why you'd even get it for me ah-" You couldn't stop rambling suddenly, "How did you know my measurements?" You asked curiously, "It fits perfectly which-"

"Are they here, are they here!?" Jinx's excited voice cut you off as she practically bounced into the room, grinning eagerly, "They are!! We can go now, Dad!" She ran to Silco and grabbed his hand, tugging him towards the door, innocently ignorant of your close proximity together. You beamed at her excitement; clearly, she had also been invited along, and you really didn't mind. Silco's form barely moved as she stopped trying to drag him after her, and instead, she turned to look between the two of you curiously, "Silco, you said we could go once they got here. They are here. Can we go?" She whined impatiently, and you noticed she was clutching a small bag that rattled with marker noises, and that she was hugging the notebook you had gifted her close to her chest with one hand. You glanced to the man next to you with a smile, meeting his pained and apologetic look,

"(Y/N)," He began, but you shook your head, taking a step towards the door of the office,

"I have no issues with her coming along," You said calmly, "Wherever we're going sounds exciting, Jinx," You said, and her wide grin returned as she eagerly grabbed your hand, pulling you along. Willingly you followed her, Silco trailing after you and pausing to lock the door.

Once you were outside in the streets, you quickly recognised he was taking you through the back lanes. Even in daylight, you wouldn't dare go through these areas of the undercity. The one time you had tried to take a shortcut on a day Silco had asked you to come in, you lost count of how many times you had almost been pickpocketed and counted your blessings when you saw a quick flash of a knife almost cut you. You darted into the bar, breathing heavily and only slightly late, but knew enough to not go this way.

Clearly, Silco didn't share the same fears as you. He didn't need to. You watched at how calmly he walked, taking measured, confident strides, shoulders proudly raised as he eyed his daughter eagerly running ahead of him, The lanes were almost empty, and those who were there kept to themselves and didn't dare bother the three of you,

"Marcus got to me eventually," He sighed deeply, breaking the silence between you. He cast a sidelong glance your way, and perhaps he admired you, his gaze lingering slightly on your body in this outfit, "It was like you said, (Y/N). A random accident before the perpetrators got away," He let out a deep sigh, "No witnesses," he said, pausing in his short speech,

"At least you're here now," You said, trying to pull him back to you as you saw him rapidly sinking in to his thoughts. His head lifted, red and black eye glancing at you quickly,

"Right... Yes," He said, "Here now," He muttered, and you let yourself walk closer to him, shoulder brushing against his,

"Did he say anything else worth mentioning?" You asked, trying to change the topic,

"They'll lead an investigation but it won't be successful. I had any obvious evidence removed or fabricated to lead them away," You nodded your head slightly, "He informed me my bartender had been helping himself to the product when he thought no one was around," He sighed deeply,

"So you hired a scrawny kid to poor drinks?" You asked, and he sighed,

"He was the only one available and qualified... Surprisingly," He said, "He got some extra training under the impression he would be helping. He is. But this job won't allow him to slack off," He spoke,

"You're teaching him a lesson?" You asked amused, and he glanced at you,

"If that's how you want to think of it, then yes," He said, and you hummed, nodding,

"Teacher Silco," You mused, glancing at him with a small smile,

"My dear, I believe you are the better teacher between the two of us," He said, and his gaze once again drifted to Jinx, giving you a moment to yourself, heartbeat racing at the intimate moment.

"So why are we here?" You asked after a while of just walking. You were now in another abandoned building, not the same one that led down to the aquarium lab, but a different one, that felt familiar to you. Now, you were gently holding on to Jinx's hand as the girl stood between you and her father, regarding him with her own curious confusion. He had been quiet for the most part- mostly talking and humouring Jinx with whatever she wanted to hear, Silco occasionally responding with his usual short answers to any questions you asked him,

"I wanted to show you something... Do you remember this place?" He asked. At your shake of the head, you observed as he approached a door, "I thought maybe there was a chance you would remember this place," he spoke to you. He didn't sound disappointed. Glancing over his shoulder and meeting your gaze for a short moment, he spoke again, elaborating "It was dark when we came here first... Years ago now" He mumbled, the door opening.

For a moment you were blinded, moving a hand to shield your eyes from the bright white light that flooded your vision, and illuminated the dilapidated building you were standing in. Slowly blinking, you let yourself adjust to the light and then moved your hand out of the way.

The sky before you was a pale blue, and large white clouds lazily danced along its surface in a circular fashion. The air was addictively clean, rushing in and replacing all the toxic chemicals that your lungs had grown used to, lapping it up like a starved creature, causing you to almost gasp, trying to get enough of this pure oxygen. Your eyes prickled with tears of joy, a smile gracing your lips. Feeling so elated, you hardly recognised Jinx's hand slipping from yours, or her eager footsteps as she ran outside towards the brightness.

Who knew the sky was just as beautiful in the day as she was at night?

"Would you care to join us, (Y/N)?" His smooth voice coaxed you to break your gaze away from the outside world and step into it. He was standing outside now, pausing halfway in, halfway out and outstretching a hand out for you to take. Fearlessly, you let the tear slip down your cheek, meeting him in the doorway as you still marvelled at the real world as your hand slid into his comfortably. The naturally beautiful one. The world you deserved. You barely registered a feather-like touch skimming your cheek, and briefly, you turned your head to catch Silco's eye as he whipped the tear from your cheek, "Don't cry," He said softly, and you felt like melting.

He took a step forward, offering you his arm that you gladly looped your own into, and off you went. The stroll by the river was quiet at first, the sounds of a gentle breeze rustling through the grass, the birds chirping their songs occupying your senses and filling you with joy. Jinx ran a little ahead of you again but kept glancing back and excitedly asking about the different flowers, and bugs she would see in the tall grass nearby,

"Oh, what's this?" she gaped, stopping to point a hand at a peculiar, white plant that resembled a tuft of fur. Unhooking your arm from Silco's you moved to her, crouching next to her,

"Those are called dandelions," you told her, pointing to a bright yellow flower amongst the dark green grass, "That's what they start like,"

"How'd it get so fluffy?" She asked, her eyes widening as you reached for the white puff, breaking the stem, and moving it closer to her,

"If you look closely, this fluff is just super thin fibres that allow it to travel in the wind. And at the bottom- this brown bit- this is a seed," You explained, "So when it flies away, the seed gets planted and there are more dandelions," Her eyes were wide with awe and happiness, "We can blow it out together?" you offered,

"Like the birthday cake?" you nodded,

"Mhm- and you also get to make a wish here," You said, smiling wider at her excitement,

"A special plant candle!?" She asked eagerly, and you nodded at her childish antics, "Ok ok, give me a second I need to think of a good wish," She squeezed her eyes tightly, moving her arms excitedly, unable to keep still. Patiently and expectantly, you watched her, "OK got it," She suddenly said, looking at you excitedly, "Do you have yours (Y/N)?"

"Yeah! Ready?" You counted her down and together blew the puffs away into the grass, both watching in silence as they floated away in small bursts, some landing in the thick grass before you and some disappearing further away,

"What did you wish (Y/N)? Did it come true?" she asked eagerly, grabbing your arm,

"I wished for Sevika to be nicer," you smiled playfully, to which Jinx squeaked,

"But now it won't come true... Oh," She giggled, glancing around, "I wanna find more," She said, "I wanna know the limit to these wishes," she said, determined,

"There's a few just over here," Silco's voice interrupted your wholesome exchange, and you were thankful you could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke, unbothered by this distraction "Just a little further this way," he urged, and you returned to your spot next to him, arm going back to his. You thought of anything to talk to him, but for the first time in a while, you drew a blank. There was something so beautiful about the world surrounding you, it took your breath straight from your lungs and wouldn't let you speak. Desperately, you racked your brain for anything to say, "Go on, (Y/N)," He said with an amused smile, making you look at him confusedly, "Clearly you're curious about something," He elaborated, "What are you thinking?" He asked,

"What's going on? Why are we here?" You asked after another moment,

"I told you already it was a surprise," he reminded,

"This isn't the surprise yet?" You gestured with your free hand to the world around you, eyes wide,

"It's part of it. Stay patient, dear," You blushed again, but nodded, glancing at Jinx and telling her not to pick up the yellow dandelions as they were poisonous. After a few moments of walking, you turned up at an old building,

"Is..." your eyes scanned the building, "It's not," Your smile grew as he nodded, "It is?" You asked for confirmation, happily grinning, "Oh my stars- I thought surely it'd be broken down by now," You said, moving eagerly towards the building,

"What is it?" Jinx asked, following after you,

"When I was a little older than you are now, Silco brought me here... It's where I saw the stars for the first time... The opening closer to here must have flooded by now, considering you didn't take that passageway," Turning to see Silco's small smile and confirming nod, "But I vaguely remember this..." You pushed open the door, letting it creak, and revealing the interior was empty. There was a large hole in the house, crashing through the roof, first and accumulating leftover rubble in the living room area. This strange window let through the last moments of sunlight before dawn, and you were quickly drawn to the reds, oranges and pinks rapidly filling the sky and subsequent room, "Oh wow..." You whispered to yourself and heard Jinx stopping next to you. It was beautiful. You hadn't wanted to cry tears of joy- you were close to. The feeling of your eyes stinging gently forced you to blink quickly as you marvelled at the view,

"Come here," Silco caught your attention, having snuck in behind you and sat on a bench that had roughly been made of a few wooden boards salvaged from the wreck you were standing in front of. Silco was bathed in the bright oranges and reds of a polluted sky, the light making his features appear sharper and more handsome. As you didn't move quick enough, he tilted his head, involuntarily giving you better access to stare at his neck and jawline, "Do you want your surprise?" He asked,

"This still isn't the surprise?" You asked in shock, your tone and wide eyes made him laugh loudly. And when you heard him snort softly between laughs, your heart fluttered warmly, making you giggle softly to yourself. Jinx turned to look at you with a confused expression, probably very confused as to why her nearly emotionless father was suddenly so expressive,

"Course it's not," He said, smiling at you, "You think all I can offer for you is an old building?" He said, shaking his head, and glancing over as Jinx moved out of view to doodle on the walls of the house, already marked by fading spraypaint with the markers she brought,

"You also bought me this?" you said, putting your arms out to gesture to the outfit, "What's all this for?" You asked in confusion, dropping your hands back down. He simply watched you, a small smile set on his lips. This lighting, the bright orange of a setting sky, illuminated him in such a strange yet handsome way. He looked utterly relaxed, leant back against the backboard of the bench and shamelessly looking at the outfit on your body. You felt yourself blushing and

"It's for you," He said, "It's always for you," He said, "I bought you back to the places that I knew made you happiest... You're still clinging to the past somehow, aren't you? You want things to always be this way" he read you like a book, and you felt your lips part slightly in a shock, "I keep telling you I can make you happier now. I'll give you whatever you want,"

"Why..." You breathed "For what?" you asked. He remained quiet for a moment, studying you, waiting for his words to sink in. He sighed then,

"Why can't you accept what's given to you?" he asked with a small sigh, "Must you always ask so many questions?" He asked, eyes flicking to the sky before you,

"Isn't it necessary when you don't give me straightforward answers?" You responded, gazing at him, "Why do you care for me so much, Silco? I thought 'emotions are a distraction.' That's what you always said, isn't it?" His eyes looked back at you, searching your face. His expression was serious but otherwise unreadable as he remained quiet for a moment

"Did you ever see Vander? After what happened?" He asked curiously, the topic of your surprise seemingly forgotten. As you looked off to the side, thinking about your answer, he spoke again, "Did you do anything for him?" He asked softly. Anyone else likely would have missed the hint of sadness that clung to those words,

"He was... different," You started, "The day after, he found me in our home. He was cold. He told me you died and if you'd been here. I lied and told him no. I didn't tell him I helped you. I was scared he'd-" you shook your head, dismissing those thoughts and continuing on, "He just said it didn't matter anymore. You were gone," your voice was low, sadness clear in your tone, "The violence with topsiders would be gone too. He then told me I had two options: I could either let those ideas die with you... Or I could join him,"

"And you didn't?" He finished for you, dual coloured eyes boring into you expectantly. His features flooded with relief as you nodded your head,

"To tell you the truth, I didn't want to live in a world without you, Silco," you said bravely, "I've always hated Piltover and been loyal to Zaun. I honestly didn't know what to do with myself once you were gone," You explained, "Vander directed me to the mines. He said my talents wouldn't be useful anywhere else" You said sadly, "And that's where you found me,"

"He was wrong," Silco remarked next to you. You heard the slight ruffle of clothes and felt his cold hand as it rested against the back of the bench, brushing against the exposed skin of your neck, "Your talents were never useless," He muttered. You bit the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from shivering at his cool touch but refused to look at him,

"Right. They're useful to Jinx now," You sighed, and remained quiet, hoping he would speak. When he didn't, you turned to look at him, regarding him, "May I ask you something?"

"Always," he sighed, watching you with an intense, unreadable gaze,

"Why are you asking me to teach Jinx how to make the bombs?" You noticed the slight roll in his eyes as you bought up the topic yet again. Opening his mouth to answer, revealing jagged, almost fang-like teeth, you quickly interrupted, "Do not give me some bullshit about her safety again," Your answer shocked him enough to widen those bicoloured eyes and shut his mouth, "I need to know the whole truth," You said. Met with his silence, you impatiently brought your hands together, clenching your fingers to stop them from shaking, "You aren't... Using her for any of your plans regarding Piltover, are you?" You didn't meet his gaze. You looked off to the side,

"(Y/N)," He warned, and you swore you could feel his glare burning into your skull, "To even insinuate I would willingly want to put my daughter in the face of danger-"

"Why are you teaching her then?" You asked with a frown,

"Safety-"

"The Silco I knew always had ulterior motives," You accused, "The Silco I knew didn't care for safety, or how many people got hurt as long as he got the results he needed. I doubt you spent time with me solely because you enjoyed my company all those years," You scoffed, true emotions that had been dormant for years finally bubbling up, "Is this it? Did you only want me to teach her what you couldn't? Or did you hope you could make her into a weapon- Silco!" You yelped in surprise as he stood up quickly, raking a hand through his hair. His posture was no longer relaxed but incredibly tensed, angry,

"I don't know who has been filling you with these thoughts or why you're even thinking like this," He said lowly, and you noticed how his hands shook as he clenched and unclenched them, "But these lies and fabrications stop here," He declared, turning to face you and glaring, his lean figure illuminated almost menacingly by the setting red sun,

"I'm simply curious," You said defiantly, standing to meet him, squinting in the light, "Silco, it's been almost a year since you came and reunited with me again. I've been thinking about this for a while now; I'm not influenced by anyone but myself" You said, moving to stand opposite him so you could see his face clearly. The sunlight was rapidly disappearing now, and his stern features were bathed in a fading orange glow, "But- and you call me ungrateful all you want- I realised that you could have come and seen me at any point," You sighed deeply, shoulders slumping in defeat, "At any point, you could have found me in those mines, had you wanted to. You. Yourself. With no other need for it than seeing me, a person who I genuinely thought you cared for. Once you realised I was only something you could use to benefit your 'cause', you found me and gave me no option. And I was so blind because it was you. My... My..." You struggled for words, and let out a frustrated groan, "Stars!! Silco, I thought perhaps you cared for me just a little bit. I was wrong. It's abundantly clear you only care for Zaun and nothing else, and it has always been this way!" You said coldly, quickly moving for the exit to the house, "This is the last time I let my feelings run so rampant. Don't look for me again. I don't want to see you," Glancing in the direction of where you had last seen the blue-haired girl, you eyed her pink, unfinished drawing, "Jinx knows everything I could ever possibly teach her too... Her lessons are finished. Have a good evening," You muttered as you exited, not daring to look back a final time at his red and blue mismatched eyes.

Swiftly walking down into the streets again, you let your tears slip down your cheeks reluctantly. You'd already cried over Silco enough in your youth. How foolish had you been to think he had changed at all in the near-decade you hadn't seen him. All he ever did was use those around him until they weren't useful to his cause anymore.

And how dare you think so highly of him when you were a mere afterthought for him? It was clear he was just buying into your affections to stay and teach his daughter how to be violent- no doubt for his personal uses later on. Always scheming, always planning. Void of all humanity. That's who Silco was. That's who he was always destined to be.

It was selfish of you to think the years would change him. You grew up with him; you watched his vaulting ambition in hopes of one day ruling Zaun propel him into power alongside Vander, their stubborn and violent natures becoming overbearing and overpowering. Until the betrayal. He slunk down into the sewers, shutting you out, and plotting his revenge. Now he had it all. And he had lost you. How easily would he replace you now that-

"Hey!" You were snapped out of your thoughts, swiftly turning to stare at a group of enforcers you had passed by unknowingly, too occupied by your racing thoughts, trying to quickly hide your tear-stained face as they approached, heavy footsteps menacingly stopped before you, followed by the heavy exhale of air through their masks, "What are you doing here?" One of them asked, voice muffled by the contraption on their mouth. You glanced between the three of them who suddenly crowded around you,

"I'm going home," You said, desperately trying not to let the shakiness in your voice show. You clenched your fists, and glared at them, "So leave me alone,"

"Home, eh?" The amusement in their voice told you clearly they didn't believe you, "Down here? In the slums? Pretty thing like you shouldn't be down here by yourself," They said, and you felt like pray around hungry dogs. You felt a hand brush against the neat outfit's shoulders, touching your hair as one of them circled behind you, blocking you from running from them. Shit,

"I- A friend gave this to me these-" you stuttered nervously,

"So the clothes' are stolen?" You gasped as one grabbed you by the front, pulling you closer to their metal-clad face to inspect your fearful expression,

"No, I promise-" You attempted, but barely got a word in,

"Shut it," Harshly they threw you down to the ground, making you wince as you placed a hand down to try and brace yourself, pain shooting down your arm, "Search them to make sure they don't have anything else that shouldn't belong to them," Feeling their invasive hands on you, you fought back, wishing you had something to protect yourself with. You wished you knew about those concealed pockets sooner. You wished you weren't an idiot who left their knife at home and went on a stroll in the most dangerous areas of Zaun. You wished Silco was with you.

Gasping, you felt them cutting into the expensive material with daggers of their own, roughly searching your pockets. Pulling, ripping and grabbing at you, then barking orders you cowered away from as you moved too much. Somehow, you worried more for what Silco would say about you not taking good care of this outfit more than the cuts rapidly flooding them with red.

Your sharp cries filled the near-empty alley as you were beaten for every wrong movement and violently searched. Anyone who had been lurking in the shadows quickly left, offering you no help. Your attempts at fighting back proved futile, met with kicks, punches and slashes of a sharp knife. You attempted to hold the suggestion of clothing covering your bloody and bruising skin for as long as you could, and you eventually succumbed to their violence, mind floating off into a swarm of blue and red, then black.

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