#it's everything a finale song needed to be for a show's final moment it DELIVERED but also had no business being that insanely well-made <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[furashuban]

One of my absolute positive thoughts on S3 is that it has my most favourite soundtrack by Ryan Carlson of any season, might even go out of my way and say that S3 has the best soundtrack in the whole series :0 Listening to a few songs from it after so long single-handedly saved me from a terrible mood tonight, I just love getting lost in each song and reliving the scenes they were made for.

(This is also another way of me saying that "The End" is—and I mean this genuinely with no exaggeration—the GREATEST song from a TV series soundtrack I have ever listened to and to ever grace television and animation <33)

[chancloud8]

Christmas Love

Pairing: bf!skz x reader Tags: fluff, sugestive ~ gift giving based on this fake texts smau

part 1: chan, hyunjin, jisung, changbin

Bang Chan - Red Lacy Lingerie

It's Christmas eve and you're waiting for your boyfriend to drag himself away from his home studio. You're hoping the delicious smell of your home cooked dinner will lure him down as well as the promise of finally getting his present. 

It doesn't take long before you hear his footsteps coming down the stairs and you quickly get up from the couch and straighten the fabric of your black dress. 

'Something smells amazing, baby,' Chan says from the hallway, making you smile. 

When he walks into the living room your breath catches in your throat. He looks absolutely mouth watering in his black slacks and white button up. The sleeves are rolled up to show off his strong arms and the fabric is tight around his biceps and shoulders. 

'Don't you look delicious,' you tease, letting your eyes wander over his frame.

Chan doesn't seem to hear you, his eyes fixated on your body where your little black dress hugs every curve. You purposely chose a dress with a very low neckline too, showing off not only the swell of your breast, but also a peek of red lace from your bra, the one you get especially for him. 

'Like what you see, honey?' You giggle, stepping closer to him. 

He snaps out of it when your hands touch his chest and he lets out a noise that sounds suspiciously like a moan. A bit like the background noises on his new song Railway. 

'God, you look like a dream,' he mutters, his hands coming up to touch your sides. 

'Says you,' you smile, standing on your tippy toes to press a sweet kiss to his lips. 

Chan immediately pulls you closer to his body, his big hands moving from your side to you back and then down to your ass. 

'Do I get to open my present before or after dinner?' He asks, gliding his nose down to your neck until his lips reach your collarbone, leaving a trail of kisses as he goes. 

You arch your back, pressing your chest against his own while interlocking your arms around his neck. 

'Hmm since the present is me in nothing but my lacy red lingerie,' you muse in a whisper. 

Chan looks up at you with big hopeful eyes, a smirk already on his lips. 

'Yeah, I think after dinner,' you say, giving him your sweetest smile before letting go of him. 

Chan's mouth drops open and for a moment he just stands there, but just when you're about to sit down at the table, he grabs your wrist and pulls you back. 

'Chan!' You squeal as he lifts you up and throws you over his shoulder. 

He just slaps your ass and moves towards the chair. 

'Dinner will have to wait babygirl, I'm starving for something different.'

Hyunjin - Paint

'Uhm baby?' You call out for your boyfriend, your eyes on the enormous pile of gifts underneath the Christmas tree.

You've only left him alone for an hour and a half to deliver home baked goodies and some presents for the children to the community center in town, while he cooked dinner. 

'Yes, love?' Hyunjin walks into the living room with two glasses of wine in his hands. 

'What happened here?' You ask, gesturing to the presents underneath the tree. 

'I finally wrapped my present for you,' Hyunjin smiles, handing you a glass and pressing a kiss on your cheek before moving to sit on the couch. 'Why? Is something wrong?'

You snort and take a sip of wine. 'You don't think you went a little overboard?' 

Hyunjin lets out a dramatic gasp and he clutches his chest with his free hand. 

'Are you saying I can't spoil my lovely girlfriend for Christmas?' 

Rolling your eyes you sit down next to him, pulling up your knees to get comfortable. Your dress hitches up a bit when you move and Hyunjin glances at the exposed skin before taking a big sip of his wine. 

'If I remember correctly, you told me you wanted to have a painting date,' he says, setting down his glass. 'I just got everything I thought we needed for that.' 

'So the whole arts and crafts store?' You giggle, once more gesturing to the mountain of presents.

Hyunjin pouts at you and you can't help but lean forward to kiss his soft and pouty lips. When you pull back his eyes are still closed and he smiles. 

'Okay, okay, let's see what you got,' you say, quickly stealing one more kiss. 

Hyunjin gets up excitedly and for the next hour you unpack dozens of art supplies. The ground is covered in wrapping paper, multiple sketching books, paintbrushes, pencils, different kinds of paint and literally everything you could ever want if you're into art. 

‘I might have gone a little overboard,’ Hyunjin admits when you unwrap the last present. 

‘You think so?’ you giggle, adding the small canvas to the pile of other supplies. ‘I really love it though, baby.’ 

‘Yeah?’ Hyunjin looks up to you from under his eyelashes. 

‘Mhm,’ you nod, crawling through the wrapping paper to sit on his lap. ‘Very much.’ 

Hyunjin wraps his arms around you and nuzzles his face into your neck. 

‘What about your gift to me?’ he asks, his lips tickling against the skin of your neck as he talks. ‘Am I getting it tonight or do I have to wait till tomorrow?’ 

‘Whenever you want, as long as I get to paint you naked too afterwards.’ 

Jisung - Hats and a surprise guest

‘My lady,’ Jisung holds out his hand to you. ‘May I have this dance.’ 

Giggling you accept and let him pull you up from your spot on the floor where you’ve just been exchanging presents. 

‘Of course, good sir,’ you say in a funny voice, curtsying. 

Jisung pulls you into a makeshift ballroom hold and the two of you twirl around the living room in a fit of giggles while your christmas playlist softly plays in the background. 

‘Thank you for my presents, baby,’ Jisung whispers in your ear when you slow down the twirling and just sway in each other's arms for a bit. ‘I love my new hat and guitar picks.’ 

You pull back a little to look at him. ‘What if I said I have one more gift for you?’ 

Jisung tilts his head in curiosity. ‘You do?’ 

‘Mhm,’ you hum and lean forward to press a kiss on the tip of his nose. ‘I do.’ 

‘Well, what is it?’ 

Just then, the doorbell rings and you mentally clap Minho on the back for his impeccable timing. 

‘Let’s go see, shall we,’ you smile, interlacing your fingers with Jisungs to pull him with you to the front door. 

‘Is that my gift?’ Jisung squeals, excitement clear in his voice. 

You open the door to reveal Minho. He’s bundled up in a red Christmas sweater, a santa hat and around his neck he’s wearing a golden scarf that’s covered in twinkling lights. 

‘Hyung!’ Jisung calls out in surprise. ‘What are you doing here?’ 

Minho rolls his eyes at him. ‘I believe I’m part of your Christmas gift, Jagi.’ 

‘You are?’ Jisung looks between you and Minho with big eyes, a smile already curling on his lips. 

‘Yes, baby, now let the man in,’ you chuckle, stepping back to make room for Minho. 

Jisung immediately clings onto Minho’s arm and drags him into the living room to show him his presents. Minho just lets him, kicking off his shoes as he walks and sending you an apologetic look when they hit you in the shin. 

The rest of the evening is spent drinking hot chocolate with marshmallows, playing games, dancing around the living room and just genuinely enjoying each other’s company. 

‘This is the best,’ Jisung says when the three of you cuddle up on the couch after another random dance party. ‘Thank you, baby.’ 

You smile up at him and he presses a kiss on your forehead before turning to Minho on his other side and doing the same. 

‘And thank you as well my other baby.’

Changbin - Gymdate & Blueberry muffins

Being at the gym on Christmas day was not how you ever thought you’d spent the holiday, but here you are, dressed in dark green yoga pants and a sports bra. 

‘You better appreciate this gift, babe,’ you pant at Changbin as you run next to him on the treadmill to warm up. 

Your boyfriend lets his eyes travel up and down your body and grins at you. ‘I already do and we only just got started.’ 

You groan and make a face at him, already hating yourself for agreeing to this. You loathe working out. Thank god you brought your homemade blueberry muffins to the gym with you, so the minute you get out of the shower you get to have a reward. 

‘Come on baby, let’s move to the mats,’ Changbin says after ten more minutes of torture on the treadmil. 

You’re already sweating, your hair is sticking to your neck and you know your face must be red as well. Changbin doesn’t seem to care, he simply holds out his hand for you and leads you over to the corner of the gym where the mats are. 

‘Lay down for me, we’ll start with some crunches,’ 

‘I really hate you,’ you mumble, getting down on your knees to get in position. 

Changbin stops you then, his fingers wrapping around your wrist. You look up at him in confusion. He must know by now that you could never hate him, no matter how much he kicked your ass in the gym. 

‘Baby, you know you don’t have to do this for me, right?’ he asks softly, his other hand comes up to wipe a loose strand of hair out of your face. ‘I won’t mind if you sit in the lounge or we can even go home.’ 

Gosh, he’s the sweetest boyfriend in the world.

‘I’m not going anywhere, I committed to this and I want to work out together,’ you say cupping his face. ‘No matter how much I curse at you.’ 

He chuckles and leans into your touch. ‘If you’re sure?’ 

You nod and lean forward to kiss him, his lips soft and gentle under yours.

‘Besides, there’s blueberry muffins waiting for us when we’re done,’ you say when you pull back. 

‘Well, you better get down on your back then,’ Changbin laughs, motioning to the mat. 

‘Oh I will,’ you wiggle your eyebrows. ‘And I might again when we get home.’ 

Changbin abruptly gets up then, hoisting you up with him like you weigh nothing at all. He lifts you in his arms and folds your legs around his waist so you cling onto his torso like a koala. 

‘Binnie,’ you laugh. ‘I thought we were doing exercises on the mat.’ 

‘Nope, not anymore. I know a much better workout we can do together from the comfort of our own home,’ Changbin grins, his hands moving to squeeze your butt. 

‘But what about–,’ you start to argue, but Changbin is already walking towards the locker rooms.

a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS! this was soooo much fun to write! I hope you enjoyed this little fluffy chirstmas gift from me to you hehe <3 part 2 with felix, minho, seungmin and jeongin will be up tomorrow hopefully! >> part two taglist: @jaeminie-cricket @jeonginsbaee @staylovesmiley @newbbystay @cashtonsbetch @mariahxrrera @kaleigh-2002 @silencionyx @smileykiddie08 @my-neurodivergent-world @yaorzu-blog @yoongiismylove2018 @staytinyluv @bookswillfindyouaway @queen-thiccness @notastraykid @ateez-atiny380 @estella-novella @furfoxsake22 @hyunjinhoexxx @insomnjen @hannahisnotblue @vivilovesuu @velvetmoonlght @skz8love @corgilover20 @littlelostdemonofthelight @stephanieeeyang @zulie-and-cats @chanshugsaretherapy @pizzalove5000

[kykyonthemoon]

Drizzle at Midnight

When you miss his twenty-seventh birthday.

── .✦ Zayne x Female Reader|MC

── .✦ Tags: angst, emotional hurt, hurt/comfort, angst with a better ending, break up & post-break up

── .✦ Word count: 1k3

── .✦ Requested by bon.

── .✦ Masterlist ♡ Request a fic

You entered Linkon City territory just as the clock on the panel displayed four round zero digits. The cool air combined with the scent of passing rain signaled the arrival of autumn. Your shadow lingered on the road all by itself. In solitude.

Your steps were rushed from the minute you exited the train station. On the deserted street there was still a shop open. Your favorite bakery. As soon as your shadow became apparent, the owner delivered you a properly wrapped box. 

“Here you go, Miss Hunter. Lucky you, our shop's about to close.”

“I'm so sorry that my order came so late at this hour.” You spoke while attempting to catch your breath. 

The bakery owner smiled at you. "Not an issue at all. We've only just started cleaning up. Last time you called to cancel the order, I was concerned that something might happen between the two of you. But today when you called again for this cake, I assumed that everything was okay.”

You clasped the box in your palm, unsure what to say for a minute. You simply nodded and smiled faintly. The bakery owner noticed that the Hunter uniform on your body had not yet been changed and realized you were too busy to be certain that you would be able to return on time to pick up the cake. After that, you gladly bid farewell to the owner and continued walking along the desolate road ahead.

Your steps slowed as you moved further away from the bakery. The shop owner knew you and the person whose cake was ordered for that day. Just the previous month, you had spent hours there asking them for advice on cake selection, decorations and other necessary things. All for this special day. But one night, the bakery received a call to cancel this specific order. You thought you would no longer need this cake. But when your mission was over and you were on the train back to Linkon, you suddenly wanted it back.

You had called that very afternoon, hoping the bakery could still make it in time. You could pay more if necessary, but the owner insisted that they still kept my order. Thinking about it, the bakery was a place so familiar to you and that person; the shop owner had also witnessed happy moments of both of you. They preserved your previous purchase because they sincerely thought you would come pick up this cake and personally deliver it to the person you loved.

Finally, you showed up. Unlike what the shopkeeper expected, you ordered this cake just for yourself.

Your footsteps halted in front of a large building. You sat down on the stairs, placed the cake box on your lap, and gazed into the distance. One side of Akso Hospital was visible in front of you. You consciously counted the number of windows that were both still illuminated and entirely dark. You stopped by his window.

The office was still lit. You smiled. Your hands trembled as you removed the ribbon from the box. Once it opened, there was a blue and white cake inside, crowned with exquisite macarons and a glistening snowflake on top. It was just how you imagined when you ordered the cake.

You also imagined his reaction when he unexpectedly spotted you at the hospital, after his shift ended. His eyes would brighten up, even before he realized the cake in your hand was for him. You would sing the happy birthday song, then urge him to close his eyes and make a wish. Most likely he would claim that he did not need to wish, because what he desired most was right in front of him. 

You had envisioned that scene so many times. Each time, you would add a small little detail; his smile, the way you stood on tiptoe when you kissed his cheek, the way he held your hand when you both returned home... But it all shattered, into thousands of pieces of ice that cut into your heart. Like all beautiful dreams that come to an end, the pain of waking up to the discovery that you have lost everything was too much for you.

Let us stop... You could not forget those words coming out of your mouth. The fault was neither his nor yours, it was just that you two no longer share the same destination. The road was divided into two directions. Looking back, you realized that he was no longer there waiting for you.

You had been away from him for a fortnight. You erased an abundance of memories about him from your phone, but his birthday reminder still existed. You turned on the screen, his account was still offline. The last time he had sent you a text message was to remind you to wear socks before going to bed. It was already cold. He was no longer by your side to take care of you like a baby. Was it because of your childish behavior that burned him out? You knew too well that he respected every decision you made, including the one that ended this relationship. Yet, honestly, you wished he would hold you tight at that time. Did he let you go because he understood that you both needed space then?

You missed him. So much. You had left Linkon and threw yourself headfirst into the mission just to temporarily forget the void he left in your heart. But the further you stayed away from him, the more you felt that air had left your lungs. You could not think about anything else but him, the surprise birthday party you had prepared in advance for him. Everything happened so fast—the argument, the goodbye... All was whirling around in your head, and the only thing you could cling onto were memories.

The past cannot be altered. You could not turn back and stop yourself from saying those stupid words. You could only wish him the best on his own path.

You turned on the lighter and lit the candles. Twenty-seven candles on the cake shimmered in the area where you sat. Your lips released a tune, your whole body swaying back and forth to the rhythm. When the song ended, the window in the front office went dark. Lights off. You blew out the candles.

“Do you want to do something special on your birthday, Doctor Zayne?”

“Every moment with you is special to me.”

“You must have eaten a lot of mint candies recently! No surprise your words are so sweet! But I still want to do something for you so that you'll never forget that day.”

“Weren't you supposed to go on a mission far away on that day? You won't try to escape back here for me, will you?"

“I am Linkon's top Hunter! I'll finish soon and come back to you, okay?"

“All right. I'll wait for you."

Twenty-seven candles went out. Tears fell from your eyes. Still, you smiled at Akso Hospital. 

“Happy birthday to you, Doctor Zayne.”

You burst into tears. Your entire body trembled so badly that the cake on your lap nearly tumbled over. You had no idea how long you sat there. The temperature grew cold, and drizzle began to fall. You raised your face to the heavens. 

There were footsteps approaching and halting in front of you. An umbrella appeared to shield the rain over your head, and that dearest face you knew emerged.

You brushed the tears away from your cheeks. Was it a dream? Your lips parted, trembling:

“Doctor Zayne?…”

He was silent. Zayne appeared astonished to see you here and unsure what to say.

“You… What are you doing here?” 

Zayne remained silent for a little longer. His gaze locked on you, then down at the cake in your lap. As if he had realized something, he formed a gentle smile.

“I'm waiting for you.”

[lostbookmark]

MDNI🔞

Main Masterlist here 

Whispered Vows Masterlist here

Summary: You thought planning your wedding was going to be a magical memory. You didn't realize that it might make you second guess everything. 

Pairing: Fiancée Yoongi x Insecure F. Reader

Genre: Romance, Angst, Smut, Hurt-Comfort

Warnings: Explicit Sex, Toxic Family Dynamics, Arguments,  Sex Toys, Self Doubt, Over Thinking, Yoongi Overworking Himself, Reader Needs To Speak Up

A/N:  It's my birthday today! So, I shall give you the epilogue. I also want to give a big thank you to all you beautiful readers who have gone on this journey with me. Thank you so much!

SMUT UNDER THE CUT!

Five months later….

Your reception was held inside the winery that you found seven months ago. Round lights were strung around the beams on the ceiling, emitting a warm amber glow. Round tables with white table cloths were scattered about the floor where your guest could rest and talk amongst themselves as they enjoyed the wine, water, beer, or whatever their drink of choice was. Mingling with one another as they enjoyed their night.

You…you were on the dance floor with Yoongi enjoying a moment between the two of you. Him in his perfectly pressed black tux and you in the monstrous marshmallow tulle dress with beaded bodice. The rough surface of the bodice slightly scratched your inner arm as the two of you swayed slowly together. Dancing closely together as Seungkwan and Jungkook belted out a song on a small makeshift stage with bright lights shining down on them. You smile up at Yoongi as you take in the moment. This perfect moment, that you wouldn't actually believe worked out the way it did. 

You and your sister had grown even closer following your wedding at the apple orchard. The two of you had many talks about your mother, who was still trying to take over wedding decisions while also planting small seeds of doubt in your head about Yoongi being a good husband. You just couldn't take it anymore. With your sister by your side, the two of you showed up on her doorstep unannounced. You mustered enough bravery and finally confronted her. You told her Yoongi wasn't going anywhere, and if she wanted to be a part of your new family, she needed to respect that. No more talking bad about him. No more pushing herself into your life. No more trying to control your wedding. She needed to let you and your sister be and let you live your lives. 

Your sister had stepped in, telling her that if she did not adhere to these boundaries, then she could forget about seeing the two of you. She could forget about meeting any future grandbabies and being called grandma. The two of you would cut her completely off. You were quite surprised that she didn't fight back. Your mom had just sat down on her couch, not saying a word as she stared at the floor. It took her a couple of minutes before she agreed. 

The three of you got on a waitlist to start therapy together the same day.

The weeks that followed were busy, and your mom stayed true to her word to back off. You and Yoongi started moving into your home, which didn't leave a lot of time for you to continue with the wedding plans. When you approached your mom for help, she was hesitant but stepped in when you needed her. You let her choose that tableware for the reception along with the table placements for the reception.  She had constantly checked in, making sure you were happy with her decisions before finalizing them. She never tried to overstep and always did what you asked of her with no extra suggestions coming from her. She even found you a photographer who gave you a great discount. She introduced him as a friend of hers, but you think they might be dating. You were happy to accept his offer. 

You got the shock of a lifetime when your sister delivered you a handwritten letter at lunch one day from your mother addressed to Yoongi. When you gave it to him, he disappeared for a while in his home studio. You wanted so badly to follow him, but instead, you gave him space and waited for him to come to you. Eventually, after an hour, he appeared again and let you read it. It was an apology. She apologized for how she treated you. Apologized for how she treated him back when he was with your sister. She thanked him for always taking care of you. 

He said he could work on trying to forgive her, but he needed to do it on his own time. You didn't push him. No, you gave him a kiss and thanked him for all the years he was patient and understanding. 

Later that night, you sat on your bed, looking at your wedding dress bag that was hanging in your closet. You loved that dress, but you were willing to take one for the team.  You texted your mom if her offer still stood on buying you the dress she loved so much.  You laugh when she sends you a picture of it hanging in her own closet. Of course, she bought it anyway.  You wouldn't expect anything different. 

“Will I be able to tear this one off you?” Yoongi whispers against your ear. 

“No,” you say with a laugh. “However, you might be able to tear what's underneath it off.”

“Oh?” He asks with a smirk. “And what exactly is underneath this.”

“You'll have to wait to find out,” you tease and press your lips against his. 

Yoongi chuckles, spinning you out and back into his arms. Your wedding was beautiful. Your dad walked you down the aisle. Yoongi had finally settled his groomsmen problem. Jimin, his best man, walked with Lisa of course.  Due to Jin and Hobi not being able to settle who gets the second spot, Yoongi recruited Seungkwan. You think he might have started to cry when he accepted the offer. In the end, he was able to walk with Jisoo. It was perfect. 

“I didn't know Seungkwan could sing,” Yoongi comments.

“I did,” you say, looking at the two men on the stage, giving it all they had as they sang into the microphones. 

“I should try and get him in the studio,” he comments, and you slap his shoulder. 

“No talking about work,” you tell him with a  small smile. 

“Okay, okay,” he surrenders with a smile, but his eyes flicker over your shoulder. “Lisa and Jisoo are trying to get your attention. 

You turn and look in the direction of Yoongi stare. You two best friends, who are actually more like your sisters, were waving frantically at you. You nod your head at them and wave back in acknowledgment. With a sigh, you turn back to your husband. 

“I have to go talk to them,” you say. “You should go mingle.”

“I don't want to mingle,” he pouts.

“Too bad,” you tell him, and you look around. “Look, Mingyu's getting a drink. Go say hi and bond over something.” 

You give him a quick kiss on the cheek and walk away before he can say anything else. You smile and wave at guests as you pass by them quickly. You didn't want to mingle either. You were on a mission, and you didn't want to be slowed down. When you reach your two friends, the three of you walk out of the reception area and down the hallway. Lisa opens a heavy wooden door and turns on the light. The bathroom wasn't that big considering there were three of you and one big dress crammed in there. 

“Hurry, I've been holding it for like an hour,” you say as you grit your teeth. 

“Sorry, traffic was bad, and there was a long line,” Jisoo apologized. 

Lisa pulled a flattened box out of her dress and slammed in on the counter. The three of you look at it and don't say a word. You couldn't believe that you were doing this here. Suddenly, a knock on the bathroom door made the three of you jump and look at the closed wooden door. 

“What's going on in there?” your sister's voice asked. 

Lisa opened the door and grabbed your sister's arm, pulling her into the room. She looked at the three of you like you were crazy. It wasn't until her eyes landed on the box that her eyes widened.  

“Oh my…” she started, but Lisa cut her off. 

“Can it,” Lisa said. “Stay and be supportive or leave and say nothing. Now, let's lift that dress and pee on the stick.”

You open the box, taking the testing applicator out before moving over to the toilet. Jisoo and Lisa gather your dress, lifting it up as you pull your underwear down. Peeing on a pregnancy test wasn't on your bingo card for the wedding, but yet here you were. It was weird urinating in front of people, but in the end, you wouldn't choose anyone else to do it in front of. Pulling the test from between your legs, you place the cap on it and set it on the sink. 

“Three minutes,” Lisa says, setting a timer on her phone. 

“I've been on birth control for years,” you say as you wash your hands. “I don't understand.” 

“He must have some strong swimmers,” Lisa comments with a nod of her head. 

“The pill is only 99% effective,” Jisoo says. “There's plenty of reasons for you to miss your period. This doesn't mean you are pregnant.”

“You've been moving and planning the wedding. Stress can definitely cause a late period,” your sister explains. 

You wish that helped ease your worry, but you can feel it in your guts that it’s positive. You've been extra tired. Peeing more than normal. Your boobs hurt like a bitch. Even the wedding dress seems to fit just a tad bit more snug than it did two months ago. You can't explain everything away being caused by stress. Lisa's alarm going off snapped you out of your thoughts and looked at the test on the sink. 

“Two lines means positive,” Lisa says, and she watches you. 

With a shaky hand, you close your eyes and pick the plastic applicator off the white porcelain sink. You don't think that you have ever been this nervous. Nervous doesn't even cover what you are feeling right now. Your first time with Yoongi, you were nervous. Your weddings, you were nervous. Right now, you are utterly terrified. Opening your eyes, you look down. 1 line…2 lines. There were two goddamn lines. Two perfectly straight pink lines. Two very bold pink lines. 

“Oh my god,” your sister whispers as she looks over your shoulder. 

“Y/N,” Jisoo says softly. 

Your vision blurs with tears threatening to fall. What will Yoongi think? How did this happen? You don't think that you missed any pills. Your little foil packet was on track. Those two pink lines just changed everything. 

“Sweets?” Lisa questions. 

“Do I tell him right now?” You ask. “We leave for our honeymoon tomorrow. We leave early. I…I…”

“Don't tell him now,” Lisa says, shaking her head. 

“You should absolutely tell him,” Jisoo says, disagreeing. “I thought you guys agreed to open and honest communication.”

“He probably won't want to go to Italy if he knows. He will be too worried about her traveling,” Lisa argues. “Don't tell him.” 

“Tell him on the honeymoon,” your sister suggests. “It would be special.” 

She's right it would be special. You can see the two of you inside the secluded stone faced villa. Surrounded by the green hills of the countryside, just the two of you. The only thing you can't see is his reaction. What if you ruin it all?

“We should go back out there before people notice that I'm gone,’ you say quietly as you hide the test and box in the trash can.

Trying to act as normal as you can, the four of you walk casually out of the bathroom and down the hall. Your eyes scan the room. They land on Yoongi and Mingyu in what appears to be a serious conversation. Your sister links her arm with yours, and you take off for your men. You just can't believe that you are here right now. Married to your sister's ex-boyfriend. Pregnant. Pregnant with your sister's ex-boyfriend's baby. Above all this, she is happy for you. What a wild ride!

“What's going on here?” Your sister asks as she wraps her arms around her fiance.

“Just talking about a possible nonprofit organization,” Yoongi answers, as he pulls you close. “Everything okay?” 

“Perfect,” you lie and steal a glance at your sister, who is giving a stiff nod. “How much longer is this party going to last?” 

“You have about another hour,” your sister answers, looking at her watch. You and Yoongi groan at the same time, causing the other couple to laugh. “Start making your rounds for goodbyes. Then you will leave quicker when it's over.”

Agreeing with your sister, you and Yoongi bid them a goodbye before moving onto the other guests, which were mainly Yoongi's family. They were sweet, but they wanted to talk your ears off. The both of you just stood there awkwardly nodding your head as they went on and on about how beautiful the wedding was. Thankfully, his mom ushered the two of you away when the conversations went on too long before sending you to your next guests. Your father and his girlfriend gave you hugs and handshakes before your dad slipped Yoongi an envelope. When he opened it, you saw money inside. 

“You already gave a wedding gift,” you said as you looked between the two of them. “You got us new furniture.”

“Well you wouldn't let me contribute to the wedding. So, have fun in Italy,” he smirks, clapping Yoongi on the back before they walk away hand in hand. 

Yoongi shrugs his shoulders and pockets the envelope in the inside pocket of his jacket. Your mother approaches you next. She wraps you in a big hug before she moves away to hug Yoongi but pulls back at the last minute. Yoongi looks at you for a moment before he opens his arms for her. You want to cry as she steps in again to give him a quick hug. 

“You two take care of each other,” she says,  pulling away. “Let me know when you make it to your rental.” 

With a kiss to your forehead, your mother leaves you alone to continue your goodbyes. Tae and Jungkook pull the both of you into a group hug, much to Yoongi displeasure. You just laugh happily, enjoying it all. Hobi steals you away from the group, picking you off your feet as he wraps his arms around you. Yoongi was still stuck between the other two men. Jin, not wanting to be outshone, kisses your hand telling you how beautiful you were before spinning and dipping you. Yoongi was still stuck between the two younger friends. Namjoon comes next, giving you a quick side hug before pulling your husband away, rescuing him.  Yoongi hurries to you while glaring at Tae and Kook. Everyone besides him laughs. 

“Well, you better take a lot of pictures,” Lisa says, coming to stand by you with Jimin at her side. “I want to live vicariously through you since someone won't take me anywhere.”

“Hey, I took  you out to eat last night,” Jimin said, defending himself. 

“Vicariously? That's a big word for you,” Yoongi comments, ignoring Jimin to get a jab at Lisa. 

“You are so funny,” Lisa deadpans. Lisa wraps her arms around you tightly as Jimin and Yoongi do some bro hug thing. “It's going to be fine.” She whispers in your ear, and you nod. 

Finally, you make your way to Jisoo and Seungwan. She looks between you and Yoongi with a slight question in her gaze. You subtly shake your head no, and she nods in understanding before hugging you securely in her arms. 

“Make sure you try as much food as you can,” Seungkwan says. “I'll send you a list of restaurants that have glowing reviews.”

“Thank you, Seungkwan,” you say, pulling away from Jisoo and hugging him next. 

“When we get back, we need to talk about getting you into the studio to record something,” Yoongi tells him seriously. 

“Well, sure,” Seungkwan says as he turns red at Yoongi words before he turns to look at his girlfriend. “I could be famous.” 

“Thanks Yoongi,” Jisoo said with a shake of her head. 

Yoongi just laughs and pulls her into a quick hug. Jisoo pats him on the back awkwardly in return. You laugh at her before you let your eyes scan the room. After all the stress and drama this wedding brought you were completely happy with the result. You were married to the love of your life. You mended your relationships with your family, and now you're growing your own little family.  Now, the only hurdle is to tell him, and you will. Eventually. You place your hand on your stomach. Eventually. 

You didn't let him tear off your dress. As gaudy as you thought it was, you wanted to preserve it just like your first one. You thought maybe your future children would like to keep them. A little piece of the two special days that you could hand down to them. A small part in your love story that they could possibly keep forever in whatever capacity that may be. 

Yoongi kneels at the end of the bed, staring at you in contemplation. It makes you feel nervous. It feels like he knows that you are hiding something. You watch as he bites his bottom lip and smirks at you. Hovering over you, he rubs your bottom lip with his thumb before slowly running his hand down your chest and squeezing your breast confined in your new white lacy bra.  Pressing his lips to yours, he groans lightly into your mouth.

“Fuck, baby,” he rasps. “I think your tits are bigger.” 

“That's silly,” you whisper against his mouth. “It must be the bra.” 

“Maybe I should take a closer look,” he jokes and kisses down the path his hand just took.  Pulling the lacy cups down Yoongi takes a nipple in his mouth, curling his tongue around your hardened peak before massaging your neglected breast before licking a wet tail across the middle of your breast and nuzzling your bare breasts.  “I don't think it's the bra.” 

“If you say so,” you say breathlessly, denying his comments. 

“I swear you get more and more beautiful every day,” he says as he unhooks your bra and flings it somewhere off to the side. His fingers venture down to the front of your matching lace panties, and he grips them tightly as he fists the material. “You said I could tear them off, correct?” 

“Yes,” you moan out in anticipation.

With a firm grip and a heated gaze, Yoongi yanks hard, and the material bites into your skin as a tearing sound fills the room. The right side of your undergarment falls away from your body. He proceeds to pull them off, pulling the ruined fabric down your opposite leg and tossing them carelessly.

Chuckling lightly, Yoongi rubs his face against the meat of your inner thigh. Pressing his lips to your soft flesh, he trails his lips up and over the white garter with a little black bow that adorns your left thigh. Smirking at you, he moves to hover over your body before molding his mouth to yours. Slipping his tongue into your mouth, you moan as it presses against your own. His hand runs up and down your leg before stopping at snapping your garter.

“We will leave this on,” he whispers against your lips. 

Yoongi's fingertips ghost over the skin of your leg as he makes his way to your most intimate spot. Using his middle finger, he rubs your entrance up and down before settling on your bundle of nerves. You gasp as he makes contact with his finger. His digit lightly drawing figure eights against your clit as he shoves his tongue back in your mouth.  He adds his ring finger, applying more pressure and speed as he circles them round and round. Pulling away from your mouth, he sits back on his knees before he finally enters your core with the same two fingers. 

“I need you,” you say breathlessly. “Yoongi please, I need you.”

“Are you sure you're ready?” he asks as his brow furrows slightly in concern. 

“Yes,” you whine. 

“You've become a demanding little thing, haven't you?” He teases, laughing a little bit. Leaning over you, he kisses your jawline up to your ear. “I like that,” he growls before giving in to your demands. 

You arch your back as you feel his hardened member enter you slowly and shallowly before Yoongi pulls back, leaving only the tip in place. You see his eyes flicker over your face to gauge your reaction before slowly pushing back in until you are completely joined. You close your eyes at the feeling of complete fullness. The push of his hips is slow and gentle after he pauses for a couple of seconds, giving you a moment to adjust to him. It was cute how he took such great care of you. However, that was not what you wanted at this exact moment. No, you can save for another day when he will probably be too worried to hurt you and the little one inside of you. Nope, not today. 

Placing your hands on his chest, you gently push at him until he pulls out of you. You quickly move to your knees and point to the bed. He raises his eyebrow at you, but he follows your silent command. You wait as he settles down against the pillows on your brand new bed. Throwing your leg over his hips, you grab his hard cock and sink down onto him. Yoongi's tongue presses to the side of his cheek as his eyes focus on your chest.  His hands trail up your side and lightly grasp your fuller breasts. They are quite tender but you don't stop him. 

Grabbing onto the headboard, you start to grind your hips back and forth against his own. His head tilts back as you gain speed as his mouth falls open slightly in pleasure. You close your eyes and let your own head fall forward, causing your hair to fall over your face. 

“Fucking look at me,” Yoongi demands and your head snaps up to look at him. “Hold on tight.”

You grip the dark brown wood as he plants his feet flat on the bed. With his hands on your hips, he thrusts up into you. Using all the strength you could muster, you meet each of his thrusts. Your ass hastily meets his thighs as his hips pound into you from below. The sound of your skin slapping, both of you panting with heaving chests. It was erotic. It was dirty. It was everything that you needed.

“Yoongi…I…I need..” You need something. What is it that you need? You have no idea. He feels too good. It's so good that you can't even form a complete sentence. 

“Keep riding me,” he growls. “I got it.”

Pressing his thumb on your clit, he hastily rubs harsh circles making you bounce a little faster trying to reach your high. Your thighs start to burn, sweat starts to drip down from your hairline but you refuse to lose focus. Moving your hands back to rest against his knees, you move to rest on your feet. Knees wide, your sway and rock your hips as fast as you can while leaned back, supporting yourself with your arms.

“Fucking, perfect,” he pants as his fingers still work thier magic rubbing against your clit. 

“Oh, god, yes,” you moan, leaning back further. His tip kisses your sweet spot with every drag of his cock against your hot wet walls. You fight the urge to close your knees at the feeling but you were losing the fight. Your knees finally start to give into the urge but Yoongi knocks them open with one his hands so they don't obstruct his view of his cock sinking into your wetness over and over again “I…can't…”

Yoongi is up in a flash, pushing 2 pillows under your hips as he lays you back. Yoongi grabs the back of your knees, spreading you wide open as he continues to thrust inside of you, not missing a beat. His pelvic bone hits your bundle of nerves with every slap. He continues to  catch your g spot with each expertly angled thrust that sends tingles shooting up your spine. You look up at him. His hair wet with his sweat, swaying over his forehead. His teeth biting into his bottom lip, trying to hold off for you. He is the pure embodiment of every fantasy that you have ever had. You're living, breathing fantasy.

Yoongi suddenly moves and crosses your ankles around the back of his neck while holding your legs straight against his body. The change causes your body to raise off the pillows, angling his hips for even deeper penetration. You cry out and grab at one of the pillows by your head as you feel yourself start to tighten around him.  

“Shit, baby,” Yoongi grunts breathlessly. With the sound of his raspy voice,  your world explodes, and your body stiffens. The stars, the fireworks, the flames all hit at once as your pussy grips his cock, pulsating and coating him in your sweet essence. “Fuck, fuck, fuck…”

You feel his body still in your haze as your legs fall limp. Lips pressing against your cheek finally brings you back to the moment. You can feel the sweat from his hair mingle with your flushed face. Panting breaths start to slow, his body collapsing at your side. His hand reaches out and  cups your face. You turn to look at him with a small smile. You're met with his half lidded gaze and a satisfied smirk. It makes you giggle a bit. His hand trails down your body before settling  on your stomach. Your heart jumps a little bit. You sigh, resting your own hand on top of his.

“Yoongi?” You ask quietly.

“Hmm,” he hums tiredly in response.  

“I…,” you start, but the words get stuck in your throat. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he answers before he kisses your cheek once more. “So fucking much.”

Yoongi rolls out of the bed and makes his way to the bathroom. You can hear him start the shower and tinker around in the cabinets. You look up at your ceiling and gently rub your stomach. Soon, you will tell him soon. 

Tagged Readers:

@mggv97 , @kam9404 , @svnbangtansworld , @futuristicenemychaos ,  @notarshia , @busanbby-jjk , @bontensbabygirl , @aretha170 , @granataepfelchen

[supernovafics]

𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄

"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist

pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader

word count: 3.2k words

warnings: explicit language, some mentions of alcohol, parent drama (both reader’s and steve’s parents suck)

summary: in which your parents and steve’s come over for dinner 

author's note: this has absolutely nothing to do with the harry styles song but the title of it is just very fitting so yeah<33 i’ve been rewatching a lot of gilmore girls this fall season so i feel like that's helped me get the hang of writing awkward/tense dinners with family lol so this needed to be done

general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Fall 1985

When your and Steve’s parents first suggested this “early Thanksgiving dinner,” you thought that it wouldn’t actually happen. 

The initial idea sounded pretty funny to you— your parents and Steve’s parents would have a full on dinner at your apartment a week before the actual holiday. Yeah, right.

It sounded like the kind of idea that parents that really cared about spending time with their children would have, and that wasn’t how you’d necessarily describe yours or Steve’s. 

A month ago, when they told you about the ski trip the four of them were going on during the entire week of Thanksgiving, you expected to just not see them probably until Christmas— and that felt like a bit of relief to you because spending time with your parents wasn’t your favorite hobby.  

But then you remembered how, only during the holidays, your parents always had a need to show, or maybe more so “prove” to themselves, that they actually cared about you. So, of course, they wouldn’t let this stupid holiday go, and instead they thought that it would be best if you all did something early and together. 

And sadly, none of the immediate excuses that you and Steve came up with worked because your moms had solutions for everything.

When you told yours that the kitchen in the apartment was too small to cook for this kind of elaborate dinner, she simply told you that they’d buy and bring all of the food and you and Steve wouldn’t have to cook at all. She also not-so-jokingly mentioned that she would’ve never trusted either of you two cooking anyway.

And when Steve told his mom that the current dining table you two had was way too small to fit all six of you, she promptly had one ordered and delivered to your door in just a week. It was an expensive dark wood set that could comfortably fit six people, and you and Steve spent hours struggling to build it the day it showed up at your front door. It took up an obscene amount of space, but it did actually look kind of nice.

Now it was weeks later and the dreaded night was finally here, but you still tried to come up with any way to avoid it from happening. 

“And we’re sure that we really can’t get out of doing this tonight?” You asked Steve as you folded the blanket that was lying half-hazardly on the couch. “I could call my mom and say that we’ve somehow fallen tragically ill in the last hour?”

“I’m ninety-five percent sure that they’re all already on their way.”

“Shit.”

“It’ll be fine,” Steve said, and then he considered his words. “Actually, it will probably suck, but overall, we will be fine.” 

You let out a sigh and placed the now folded blanket back on the couch and then started cleaning off the coffee table, stacking the random magazines in a neat pile and then adjusting Harold’s cage so that it was nicely in the center. Your and Steve’s shared pet hamster was currently nibbling on the food that you had put in his bowl only moments ago. 

An abrupt feeling of worry shot through you as you looked around the apartment. The place was clean— probably the cleanest it had ever been— since you and Steve had spent the day doing everything to avoid either of your parents saying anything bad about the place. However, in the grand scheme of things, you knew that it didn’t matter because they’d still hate the apartment. They would hate how you two decided to furnish and decorate it, and they would passive aggressively make fun of the place for however long this dinner would have to be.

“Let’s try not to think about how bad this night is gonna be and just be glad that we’re not gonna have to suffer alone, like usual,” Steve said, practically reading your mind and the look on your face, as he started setting plates out on the new table. 

He was completely right. This was the first time that a collective Thanksgiving was happening among all of you. Usually, it was just you alone with your parents in Chicago visiting family members that you never talked to, and Steve was doing the same exact thing except he was in Indianapolis. You’d always end up calling each other at the end of the night from the hotel or family house you were staying at, and you’d tell each other stories about whatever weird family members you encountered or how boring it all was. 

It did make things feel a bit better that, for once, you didn’t have to go through this alone and neither did Steve.

“You’re right,” You said with a nod and then smiled. “We’ll be going through this shitshow together.”

As if on cue, there was a knock at the door and since Steve was closer he went to answer it. You took one brief and final look around the apartment before heading toward the door too, so Steve didn’t have to be by himself in this greeting.

“Hi,” He said when he opened the door and saw all of your parents standing there. There was a bright smile on his face and he effortlessly turned on that “Steve Harrington charm” that people had adored in high school— you hadn’t even gone to the same high school as him, but you still heard so many of the stories.

A chorus of Hi’s and Hello’s were heard as your moms entered the apartment first since they were carrying all of the food and your dads followed in right behind them.

“I still hate that you moved into a place that doesn’t have a front doorman, or, at least, a buzzer system,” Were your dad’s first words to you; deciding against saying the simple “How are you?” that you had expected. “You two should get a better lock on your door.”

You laughed a bit. “We live in Hawkins, not New York, Dad. I don’t think anyone is really itching to rob us anytime soon.” 

“Anything can happen,” He responded, looking at you seriously. “I’ll bring you a new one when we get back from Colorado.”

You only nodded at his words instead of saying anything to rebut them; you knew that he overall meant well. “Okay.”

Your attention turned to your mom and she pulled you into a hug that felt way too forced before pulling away and giving you a quick onceover. “Oh… Is that what you’re wearing?”

You thought that your outfit was fine; a V-neck navy blue knit sweater that was a bit cropped and a simple pair of black jeans. But, your mom always managed to find something wrong with everything, so this reaction to your current outfit didn’t necessarily surprise you; it did still annoy you all the same, though.

“Oh, um, no I was just about to change,” You told her and forced a small smile.

She nodded at that. “Okay, that’s good, that’s good. You go change while Christine and I get the table set up.”

You started heading toward your room but looked back at Steve first. He was in a conversation with his parents that looked like they were doing much more of the talking than him. As if sensing your gaze on him, his eyes met yours and he gave you a hopeful look and that was enough to make you feel a little better.

It didn’t take long for you to change. You kept your sweater on but traded your jeans for the long black silk skirt that your mom had always liked on you. You hoped this slightly different outfit would be enough to satisfy her, and if not, you were willing to suffer through her inevitable look of disappointment. 

You lingered in your room, tidying up your desk for no particular reason and then deciding to remake your bed. It was clear that you were stalling, avoiding having to face your parents again, and as much as you wanted to continue doing that, you also didn’t want to leave Steve to fend for himself. You were supposed to be suffering together, after all. 

You immediately noticed the dining table when you walked out of your bedroom. The food was now nicely set out and there were even brown placemats sitting underneath the plates that Steve had already set out. It was all set up in a way that would’ve felt nice and wholesome if either of your families had ever remotely felt like the ones portrayed in most TV shows or movies. But, they weren’t anywhere close to being like that, so this all just felt weirdly forced.

Of course, you didn’t say that, though.

Instead, you sat down with everyone at the table and desperately hoped that the next few hours of your life would breeze by. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“From the brochure, the pictures of the cabin look really great. We hope it actually looks that way in person,” Steve’s mom, Christine, said. 

You took another bite of the mac and cheese on your plate as you continued to listen to your parents talk about their ski trip that was happening next week, which they had been doing for the last twenty minutes and you fully didn’t mind it. Since the conversation wasn’t centered on either you or Steve, things actually didn’t feel tense or nervewracking. If you could just make your parents talk about themselves during the entire dinner, you would probably end the night with a smile on your face. 

“Oh, and there are a lot of bedrooms too,” Your mom chimed in before taking another sip from the wine glass in her hand. “Maybe you two could take a trip up there soon and invite your friends to go too.” 

“Yeah, that would be nice,” You said with a small nod.

“Enough talking about the trip, though, that’s probably so boring for your kids to hear about,” Your dad said, and you internally sighed because you knew the exact direction the conversation was about to go in. You felt him look at you. “How’s school been going? The semester is almost over.”

“It’s been good,” You answered, keeping your response short and sweet. You decided not to mention that you really couldn’t care less about the majority of your classes because none of what you were doing in any of them felt like it really mattered. 

“Okay, and your grades and everything are fine, right?”

You only nodded in response to his question, hoping that your lack of actual words would signal to him that you wanted to bring an end to this topic of conversation. Of course, that was only wishful thinking.

“That’s good,” Your mom said. “You have to make sure your grades stay like how they were in high school, or even better, for when you transfer to the University of Chicago. We don’t want to have any reason for them not to accept you again.” 

You suddenly felt like you were right back in middle school and high school, where your conversations with your parents solely revolved around school; what your grades were, if you were doing your homework and completing assignments on time, and studying for tests. It always annoyed you that the only times they would bother to pay attention to you was when it came to that stuff. Other than that, you were always seemingly an afterthought, never a bigger priority than their jobs. 

In a way, this entire conversation should’ve been expected; it was always inevitable. Pretty much anytime you talked to your parents in recent months, the discussion always seemed to circle its way back to that school and you going there in two years instead of right now, like they had wanted you to.

“I’m still so surprised that you decided to not go to the University of Chicago now,” Christine said and you turned your attention to her. It was starting to feel a bit painful to you that the subject still hadn’t changed yet. “When Steve told me that you were going to go to the community college close by, I couldn’t believe it, honestly.”

You noticed your parents share a look upon hearing her words. The mix of disappointment and annoyance toward you that was shared between them in that moment felt palpable. 

“I didn’t think it was time to leave Indiana just yet. I’ll be going soon, though,” You said, keeping your voice light and plastering on a fake smile, even though all you wanted to do in that moment was leave the table and hideout in your bathroom for the rest of the night. 

You saw your dad smile a little and then you also noticed the look of relief wash over your mom’s face. For some stupid reason, you still felt the need to make them feel pleased with you. And somehow that made you feel even more upset with yourself than anything they had said to you so far tonight. 

The only thing that managed to make things feel remotely tolerable right then was Steve sitting across from you, giving you a look that said, “Everything will be okay.” For the time being, you chose to believe him and you simply took another bite of your food. 

You were about to say something about how good the turkey was so your moms would start talking about the restaurant they got all of the food from and why they chose it— you were sure that there was some story behind it all— and that would finally bring an end to the college conversation. But, before a word could leave your mouth, Steve’s dad began speaking. 

“Well, at least, you’re in college. We can’t say the same for Steve here.” He then looked at his son. “Do you really want to work at a video store for the rest of your life?”

 Christine let out a sigh. “Jeff.”

“What?” He shrugged as if his previous question wasn’t completely condescending. “I’m just asking a question.”

“I’m actually starting at the community college next semester,” Steve told his parents and you tried to hide your immediate confusion. “I found out I got in a few days ago.”

“Well, that’s great,” Christine said happily, and Jeff smiled approvingly as well. 

You had no idea Steve had gotten in or even applied, and you wondered if he was lying right then to just get his parents off his back, but you couldn’t tell. Something about the way he said it honestly felt pretty real. The only part that didn’t feel real was that you were finding out during this dumb dinner instead of at any other time. 

“So, I was wondering,” Your mom began and you braced yourself for the impact of whatever she was going to say. “Why did you two decide to get a hamster? I feel like it makes things smell a bit funny in here…”

A part of you was glad that the conversation finally shifted away from college. But you didn’t think that the passive aggressive comments toward the apartment would begin with Harold. 

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

“Well, this night was fucking brutal.”

You let out a sigh. “You took the words right out of my mouth.”

Steve was doing the dishes as you put what was left of the food into tupperwares and then put them in the fridge. Surprisingly, it was a lot of stuff leftover; your moms definitely went overboard with the amount they had ordered. You and Steve already made plans to invite Robin and Eddie over tomorrow to have some of these leftovers.

“I’m actually glad that the dessert tasted bad since it made them want to leave early.”

“It was honestly a bit bittersweet because I was kind of excited for that pie,” You said as you placed the final tupperware of food into the fridge and then went over to Steve. “Oh, and also,” You punched his arm and ignored his immediate “ouch.” “Why the hell didn’t you tell me that the stars have finally managed to align and we’ll finally be going to the same school for the first time ever?”

He smiled a little at your dramatics. “I didn’t wanna make a big deal out of it just in case I somehow didn’t end up getting in. I swear I was gonna tell you tomorrow.”

“So, you did all of that annoying application stuff by yourself?”

“Robin helped me with it.”

“I would’ve been happy to help you,” You told him, and maybe you were being a bit overdramatic, but you actually felt slightly offended that he hadn’t wanted to come to you about this. 

The possibility of you two going to the same middle or high school was a far out idea that never happened because you lived in different towns. But, it was still something that was adamantly and wistfully talked about by you and him; how much more fun both of your school lives could be if they intersected in that way like the other parts of your lives did. 

Of course, going to the same college would’ve been the most obvious way for it to finally happen, but Steve never seemed that interested in going to college, and up until the last possible second you were being pushed toward Chicago by your parents. 

But now things were finally different.

“I know that you would’ve, but I didn’t want to talk about it to anyone, honestly. Robin saw me working on the application one day and decided to help,” He explained and you only gave him a small nod in response. “I didn’t even think I’d tell my parents about it, but when I heard my dad’s dumb comment about Family Video I felt like I had to say it so he wouldn’t keep looking at me like a disappointment.” He sighed. “And it’s kinda fucked up… I really don’t wanna care what my parents think about me and what I’m doing with my life, but I think there will always be a part of me that does.”

You thought back to your dad’s approving smile and your mom’s relieved look when you reassured them that you still planned to go to the University of Chicago; how much you still wanted to make them feel at least a little proud of you even though you knew you shouldn’t.

“Me too,” You said softly. 

“I’m glad we probably won’t have to see them again until Christmas.”

You sighed. “Apparently, my dad is gonna bring us a new lock for the door when they get back from their trip.”

“Oh,” Steve said and then smiled at you when it looked like he thought of something. “Okay, what are the odds that he’ll just send someone to put the new lock on the door instead of coming himself?”

You thought about it for a second. “Honestly, I’d say there’s a pretty good chance that would happen. He’ll probably be too busy with work after the trip to actually come and do it himself.”

“Okay, let’s hope for that,” He said as he finished washing the last plate and placed it on the drying rack. “So, since the dessert was a bust tonight, do you wanna go to the diner? I’m sure Mary would never fuck up her apple pie. And then when we get back, we can finish that bottle of wine that our moms left.”

You smiled at his suggestion. “You have a brilliant mind, Harrington.”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

let me know ur thoughts<333

(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)

[prettyoddfever]

re: the Fever-era stage gay routines

I'm integrating a previous post into this one so I can cover all of the pre-split years and everything in one place. Again, I'm iffy on the term "stage gay" but idk how else to describe it so here we go.

So Brendon said this quote in 2018: "For our first headline tour I would go up to Ryan our guitar player, and like kiss him on the neck or kiss him on the mouth and he would be so mad. I was like, I just want to kiss you bro."

Ignoring all history & precedent of the way that Brendon tends to exaggerate for effect and often goes for the general idea & how he feels at the moment when looking back rather than actual specific facts... he's still talking about the band's first headlining tour in April 2006. And yeah, that's the only season where I think this quote MIGHT be plausible. If the situation actually played out exactly as Brendon says, then of course that's not ok. But you still can't project that scenario onto literally every part of the Fever era or form your entire perception of a whole era (or an entire work relationship) off of one single interview quote from years later. That's going to leave you with an incredibly distorted understanding of the band's dynamics with each other & fans, Ryan's input and stage presence, and what's actually going on in the pictures you're looking at. Like people are clearly missing so much context if they're able to look at a picture of the IWSNT mic-sharing from summer 2006 and think that it was one-sided sexual harassment (or some kind of actual Ryden thing).

THE EARLY MONTHS

So the guys weren’t super close onstage in late 2005… they were mostly trying to figure out how to even be onstage lol. They watched the bands they were touring with and learned as they went. You could almost see little pieces of each band’s influence show up for a while. Brendon totally modeled himself after Jason Vena in early fall 2005, and then he had clearly been watching William Beckett closely in early 2006 (that influence carried on throughout the year). It was also interesting to watch Brendon navigate what he thought fans wanted or expected when he was an 18-year-old boy thrown into an international spotlight with girls (and boys) screaming “f— me!” at him (one example). It really looked like he learned to play into a role (this is included). And I mean that in terms of being a popular frontman. That’s not even taking into consideration the actual way that Brendon needed to adopt a persona onstage throughout the whole Fever era. Look at the type of songs he had to sing. Both Brendon & Ryan talked a lot in 2005-2006 about how Brendon needed to get into a character onstage to deliver the risque lyrics.

The types of halfhearted moves that Brendon started to make on Ryan by the end of the Truckstops & Statelines tour looked like he was just following the example of bands he’d been watching on tour. Brendon started making bigger moves on Ryan in April once P!ATD had to step up their game for their first headlining tour (which happened 8 months after they played their first show ever). That UK tour had some shows that were bigger than the first half of the summer tour in North America. There were times in 2006 when I felt like P!ATD was more of a UK band than American partially because of how intense the frenzy was over there.

Brendon was still testing different stage personas and figuring things out during this season, and the band still felt like 4 separate guys trying to find their footing. They were talented & good, but there was absolutely a huge shift in the band itself once Jon arrived in May. They finally felt like a strong united group. They went back to their practice space for a while in May to figure out the details of what they wanted their band to be like onstage, rehearse with their two new touring musicians + Lucent Dossier, and re-learn updated versions of their songs. The last half of the Fever era was polished and very intentional... they felt like a different band by June in many ways.

THE SUMMER TOUR

I thought this seemed like the picture that really got the Ryden craze going in summer 2006 (before fans had totally decided on the “Ryden” name – some were saying “Bryan”). It was taken a few days into the summer tour:

There were a ton of new fans arriving during the summer tour, so that picture formed some first impressions. By this summer many fans would basically only ask people to describe the moments when Ryan & Brendon came near each other at a show and every look they shared. People who went to shows would mention how at different points they saw one of the four guys suppress a laugh when the crowd would positively scream if Brendon & Ryan came within two feet of each other.

The Panic guys were well aware of what their fans wanted and what was being said online (for better or worse). Yes, they got annoyed during the last half of the year when fans took things too far or were focused more on Ryden stuff than the music, but it seemed like they also wanted to have fun with a fanbase that they were being increasingly distanced from as they became more & more famous. There were quite a few stories of Brendon and Ryan playing up the Ryden angle at meet & greets throughout the last half of 2006 to make fans laugh or freak out (and Ryan initiated some of that, so it wasn’t purely Brendon). There's more in this post.

The point is that the shows in this tour were very intentional and felt more like watching a theater show than the type of band who interacted with their audience (which was a huge fan complaint this season tbh). Ryan was more confident & comfortable onstage with his new makeup, was actively engaging in mic sharing and playing into what the crowds obviously wanted to see, and seemed like he was largely in control of how the shows would go even if he still sometimes shied away from attention in general onstage.

Ryan & Brendon did continue some of their antics at random international shows in August & October, but it kind of seemed to depend on the audience. Those shows were also a different vibe from the national tours.

NOTHING RHYMES WITH CIRCUS

This season was on a whole other level, so here's a separate post that goes into important detail!!

^^^ seriously, please read.

The creepy leering character that Brendon was playing during the NRWC tour is obviously not his actual personality, nor his typical onstage character for the whole Fever era (although I did see hints of it return during the 2008 Halloween show when Brendon was in his vampire costume lol).

AFTER THE FEVER ERA

The band played a handful of regular shows in 2007 like any other band. They wore jeans and dropped the stage gay & makeup because those elements were part of the Fever-era shows and that era was done now.

Ryan did try to instigate parts of their former routine at the first show in 2007 before the band had found their new direction, though.

Brendon kissed Ryan on the cheek at Bamboozle 2007 when wishing him a happy birthday.

The Pretty. Odd. era was completely different on so many levels. Ryan & Jon largely ran those shows and the new music didn’t require a dramatic frontman in an entertainer/narrator role anymore. Ryan was WAY more confident onstage and would often stroll over to mess with Brendon or share his mic. Ryan was the one who often instigated any interaction. Jon even slapped Brendon’s butt at some shows. A lot of fans would claim that Ryan kissed Brendon’s cheek, but in hindsight I think it’s more likely that he was whispering to Brendon and knew that fans would get overly excited. Also, the moment where Brendon kissed Ryan’s cheek before Mad as Rabbits at Glastonbury was definitely not the norm.

ABOUT THE ROUTINE "RYDEN" MOMENTS IN 2008 (not on the same level as 2006, but still pandering to what fans wanted).

COMMON FEVER ERA MOMENTS

a few examples...

MISC. THOUGHTS

The point of this post is to show that the endless pictures that some people might share of "Ryden" moments or "Brendon sexually harassing Ryan" are often like the same points of the same songs on different nights, or just taken out of context of the actual Fever era. To be clear, I’m not attempting to excuse/explain every single thing Brendon ever did in this post, or attempting to speak for Ryan... idk what he was comfortable with or everything that went down between them.

However, I do think that people who assume Brendon forced Ryan into anything (in any aspect of the band) don’t understand their work relationship or the pre-split band’s dynamics & who had the power. That band was waaaay different than the one that Brendon had in later years. Back then he wasn’t really in a position to pressure Ryan into anything creatively-speaking (more info here). Ryan was shy in interviews, but he was in no way a pushover within the band… and to assume something like that kind of discredits his massive contributions. With the amount of control that Ryan had, I just really don’t think he would have let something so prominent get worked into the shows if he wasn’t ok with it in the first place (let alone instigate it himself sometimes).

Ryan talked a lot in the pre-split years about how he really wanted to challenge fans, push boundaries, do something different, shake things up, and keep experimenting instead of settling into a rut of what was comfortable/familiar. In a Danish interview in October 2006 he said "we do not want to be a safe band, neither with our songs nor our shows."

I thought the stage gay element seemed to loosely fit into those goals & ideas. But at the same time, I don't think it was ever that defined. It felt like it was just a random fun thing & wasn't that deep. Spin asked Ryan if he and Brendon were toying with the idea of bisexuality, which was a bit annoying because their antics obviously weren't that legit or a Serious Statement. I liked Ryan's answer:

[man-down-in-hatchet-town]

VHSCC OH MY GOD

(no spoilers)

Starkid nation, you aren't ready.

So let's start with the obvious. Look, I spent thirteen years growing up with Starkid. That initial Michigan gang are deeply special to me and I will always miss Dylan, Brian R., and Corey in any show they aren't in. And this one's no different. But just as Janaya came in and took over Belle from Britney so flawlessly, Curt, Brian, and AJ were all WONDERFUL in their new roles. The gentle-but-high-energy, truly decent, romantic himbo charm Curt brought to our Springsteen boy Jim (you all are going to LOVE Jim, I promise) perfectly offset the defiant, sneering anger of Young Scrooge in "That Scrooge." Brian's reactions (particularly to the "rather take my own life" line) were so funny and some of my favorite parts of the show. And AJ... this is now my favorite thing AJ has ever done. And that's saying something. The smaller casting shake-up moments (Joey as Fezziwig, other little line re-distributions) were so fun as well!

The new act 1 is PERFECTION. I was actually surprised by how absolutely hysterical it was? Like, I won't tell you what was up with that clip on Instagram of Brian, Lauren, and Joey doing a freak-out dance, but I can tell you that their whole Act 1 deal threatened to steal the show every. Single. Time. I already mentioned Curt as Jim, but you will also love Della, who is so funny and real and truly carries us through the start of the show (Janaya is a STAR and she Curt have brilliant chemistry). Ali did a terrific job of balancing the sadness and hope that are both at the center of the devastating little Match Girl. And Jamie's Grandma... well, honestly I have no idea how to talk about Jamie's song without giving stuff away.

But the real star of the show in Act 1, as he should be, was our man Clark. I can't emphasize enough how much he nailed the writing of this whole new act. I mentioned that the new stuff is hilarious, but it's also deeply heartfelt, and also sad exactly when it needs to be. Like, the transition after Jamie's song? I can't really talk about it yet, but what that moment does with emotion is unreal. And, as expected, every song is a banger! My one complaint about this show, and it IS a big one, is that there is no cast recording of the Act 1 songs. I want to listen to them all the time.

But the good news is, I CAN listen to Christmas Carol as much as I want! The classic that started it all is back, with so many people reprising the hell out of their truly iconic roles (God I love the VHS Cratchits), and better than ever. I traditionally hate change, and I love the version of VHSCC Live! we already have so much, but I think I somehow loved this version even more? The staging is alive and clever and there are some additions and changes, particularly in "Final Ghost"/"Christmas Day," that frankly blew my mind and somehow managed to elevate the material even further. I can't wait for the digital ticket to come out so that I can talk about them. To put it simply, James Tolbert mastered his Starkid directorial debut like you won't believe. I'm so proud of him and grateful for the larger role he's taken in Starkid since they moved base to LA.

Also, the Ghost of Christmas Past is extra unhinged this year? Jaime pulled out all of the impish stops and it was the BEST.

Basically, everyone more than delivered. I haven't talked about Meredith yet but she rocked it in the band and continued to validate the hell out of my opinion that "3 Spirits" is the dark horse best song in the show.

And a special shout-out to June Saito for continuing to be a costuming GENIUS. I always love her work and this production is no exception. I honestly wanted to give the return of the Bob Cratchit costume its own round of applause.

You know, the world is a mess and everything is pretty much terrible. It's been a hard year in an impossible decade. But every once in a while you come across some art that takes all of that, acknowledges the truth of it, and somehow pulls back the curtains to harness the joy and hope that's still there under the rubble. To me, Starkid in particular has always been about finding and holding onto the hope and the beauty and humanity that allows us to endure an existence that can so often feel bleak. And VHSCC is maybe the most perfect encapsulation of that idea.

So thank you Clark, James, Meredith, Brian, and everyone who worked so hard on this little bit of magic. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Let's make a little light.

[homeofthelonelywriter]

Drawn to you | Pt. 7

(A/N) Okay, writing alive!Alastor is a lot of fun. Also, I'll already put out a warning for the next part. It will be a though one.

Pairing: Alastor x bunny demon!Reader (no Y/N)

Warnings: some more murder, foreshadowing, kisses

Synopsis: He remembers you. Finally.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

Alastor couldn’t deny that he was somewhat nervous. After all, he had just killed his boss. No matter how much he tried to concentrate on his work and script for tonight, he kept seeing the bloodied body of the man in front of him. And it made him smile. The rush he had felt…was addicting and in his mind, he was already choosing his next victim.

But before he could do that, he had a show to deliver. And knowing that you were among the listeners gave him the boost he needed to finish his script and slowly get ready. While he was in is office, doing vocal warm-up exercises, he thought of you, how you were probably on the bus at the moment, on your way to the tiny apartment that you called home.

If only you’d let him, he could offer you so much more. A house, with a nice backyard where you could plant your favorite flowers. He would build a swing for the two of you and maybe you could get a dog. Something to protect you while he was gone. You could finally quit your job here and escape this thankless, misogynistic place.

He would put the prettiest, little ring on your finger and wear his own with pride. He would take you to his mama and introduce you, sure she’d love you just as much as he did. He would brag to anyone who’d listen that you're his. His best friend. His lover. His wife. The mother of his children. Children…he would put as many in you as you’d allow. And he’d be a better father than his own ever was.

He could see it clear as day, his life with you.

“Al? You have two minutes until you’re on air?”

The voice of the radio host’s assistant brought him back to reality and he jumped slightly in surprise.

“Oh, of course, my apologies.”

With quick steps, Alastor rushed to the booth he was hosting from and quickly got settled, just in time for the red light above the door to turn on and the music to end.

“Welcome ladies and gentlemen to today’s late show. I’m your host, as usual, Alastor! What a lovely evening folks, gotta say, I’m kind of jealous that I’m in here, while ya’ll can enjoy the outside.”

He took a practiced pause before continuing his spiel, talking about some nonsense before he started the first song. As soon as his microphone was muted, he took a deep, relaxing breath and glanced out the large window into the room, where the assistant was supervising the show and taking phone calls from listeners. He gave him a thumbs-up to signal that everything was going smoothly and he nodded in return.

After the song was over, Alastor took the time to talk about the 19th amendment, knowing that you’d have to go to bed soon and he wanted you to hear him talk about it.

“All in all, it’s an important step in America’s history folks, and all I can do is hope that everyone in Congress sees reason and votes in favor. If not…well that’s just proof that this country is ruled by old, fat, ignorant men. And if you don’t agree with me, there is this handy little dial on your radio, you can use to switch to a different channel.”

He knew that he’d get in trouble for that little stab at his listeners, but the image of you giggling about the comment made it worth it. His own smile grew into a smirk that stayed on for the rest of the night until another host took his spot and Alastor could finally go home. On his way out of the building, he noticed the police presence. The body had finally been found.

Acting confused, he joined a small group of coworkers who were whispering to each other in the lobby. They nodded in greeting but continued with their hushed conversation until Alastor spoke.

“Do any of you know what’s going on?”

“Al…it’s your boss. He was found behind the building, dead.”

As if in shock, Alastor took a step back as his eyes widened. He even dropped his jacket which he had been carrying. He whispered his boss’s name, for once, no smile on his face.

“Are you sure? I just saw him a few hours ago. He…he can’t…”

The entire group nodded in confirmation that it was indeed his boss and Alastor blinked a few times while looking at the ground. He soon excused himself, keeping the act up until he was a few blocks away from the building. Even as he was walking away, he felt their concerned gazes on his back. If radio host doesn’t work out, he should consider becoming an actor. Or so he told himself.

On his way home, he felt his fingers itch, his eyes scanning every creature he came across, debating if he could kill them. But no, he had to be patient. After all, he already knew who his next victim would be. Maybe it was a bad idea to kill two people so closely connected, but he had wished death upon your boss from the moment he met you. The only thing he had to figure out was how to do it. But that could wait…for now.

Hell - now

“-stor? Alastor?”

You had woken up a few moments ago, confused for a second as to where you were, but as soon as you noticed Alastor next to you, you relaxed. At least until you noticed that he wasn’t moving. Or even blinking. He just stared ahead, eyes blown wide, his smile as low as you’d ever seen it. He looked…haunted.

You carefully sat up and reached for him. For once you didn’t wait for his permission before you touched him, instead just placing your hand on his shoulder and shaking him slightly. You began to whisper his name, getting louder when you noticed that he didn’t react to any of it. Close to panicking, you placed your other hand on his shoulder and started to shake him with more vigor. At least until his eyes snapped up to you.

With movements so quick it took you a second to realize what had even happened, he pulled you into a tight hug, pressing you against himself and whispering your name. No…it wasn’t your name. It was a nickname he used when you were both still alive. Tears gathered in your eyes at the realization.

“You remember.”

Alastor pulled you impossibly closer, just continuing to whisper your name. Your body started to shake as quiet sobs escaped your lips. You buried your face in his neck, wetting his fur with your tears, but at that moment, neither of you cared.

The demon continued to hold you, slowly shifting you so you were sitting on his lap while he still worked through everything he just relived. How could he ever forget you? The love of his life? His best friend? His girl?

Earth - 1920s

“Well, what can I say ladies and gentlemen, the killing spree continues as another victim was found earlier today. My source in the police department reports that there are still no leads to the identity of the killer, so I urge you: to stay in after dark and stay in groups. No one is safe when it comes to that one.”

Alastor took a breath and glanced towards the window, where the radio host’s assistant once sat. But now, there was you. It’s only been a few months since he had gotten you the promotion, but the excitement of seeing you there never subsided. After all, he’d never tire of seeing you. Especially not after you finally allowed him to court you.

You had said yes shortly after Alastor had killed your boss, not that you knew about any of that back then. But the stress relief it brought you, finally allowed you to even think about dating. And after Alastor asked you out, all you could do was say yes. It started with Alastor insisting on accompanying you home after he was switched to host the afternoon show, meaning that both of you got off at the same time. After all, how could he let you walk home alone when a dangerous serial killer was roaming the streets? Especially because back then everyone was still thinking that he was specifically after people who worked at the radio station.

Him bringing you home turned into you inviting him into your apartment for a cup of coffee, into the two of you getting dinner before going home, into the two of you going to a jazz club. And one night, after you had both gotten at the very least tipsy and you complained about your old boss and the misogyny at work, Alastor was so close to confessing. Instead, he admitted that he envied whoever did it, how he would’ve loved nothing more than to do it himself. And in that moment you kissed him.

You pulled him down and pressed your lips against his in a gentle kiss. The fact that he would kill for you made warmth spread through you. You truly loved this man. But you would never know that truth. At least not in this life.

The shy smile on your lips pulled Alastor from his thoughts. He had been staring at you through the whole song and it was almost over. Usually, he would pause to talk some more, but instead, he decided to just let another one play. You raised an eyebrow as you noticed the switch in behavior, but Alastor just waved for you to join him. So you did.

You entered the room and he extended a hand towards you, pulling you onto his lap once you were close enough. You giggled as you fell against him, feeling his chest vibrate as he chuckled.

“How are you doing, my love?”

You hummed, a coy smile on your lips as you gazed up at him.

“A little tired, the usual lately.”

That made Alastor frown. He had noticed that you seemed to have less energy recently, but he chalked it up to stress. With a worried look on his face, he pulled back and properly looked at you, and he quickly realized that you had lost weight. A lot of it.

How could he miss that?

“Love, I think you need to go to the doctor.”

You shook your head and started to talk about how that was too expensive, but he quickly cut you off, assuring you that he would take care of that. After a bit of bickering, you agreed to make an appointment as soon as you were back at your desk.

After one more kiss, Alastor let you go and returned to host the show, while you walked back to your desk and picked up the phone, scheduling an appointment for the next day.

Neither of you had been prepared for what you were going to find out.

@impulsivethoughtsat2am @fanficwriter5 @wonderlandangelsposts @mo-0-o @xalygatorx @fairyv-ice @nixie189

Please consider reblogging and following me! It helps a lot!

Hazbin Hotel - Masterlist

Master-Masterlist

[mae-i-scribble]

I'm so so so happy that the anime is finally here!!!! I watched it as soon as I could even being exhausted after work and it was so worth it. Literally just a direct shot of happiness into my veins. I had a good feeling about the show after the trailers but as a long time manga fan I really am overjoyed that the show is doing it justice!! As a romantic comedy almost gag manga the show absolutely delivers. Some cuts feel a bit abrupt when they didn't need to be but there were also some perfectly timed shot cut aways that made everything so much better. I also really loved the little sound effects, like the beeps of confusion and the little angry noises in time to Hagi's angry expression signs dancing around him when Suo is revealed to be the "prince" of their school. Overall the animation is incredibly well drawn, with minimal motion in favor of putting emphasis on expressions. It can be a bit noticeable at times that they're def cutting down on production costs but overall it never took me out of the show or took away from the enjoyment of the comedy. It's more something I notice because I really love animation and will always keep an eye on it when watching any animated media. The voice acting in it is also fairly standard in regards to my expectations. From the initial trailers I wasn't too sure about Tokiwa's voice but watching this episode made me really appreciate it. I love the near constant underlying anxiety/confusion when it comes to him interacting with Suo, and in general his anxious noises are great fun. Kohaku's voice I was also pleasantly surprised by. From the trailers it sounded like they were going for a more stereotypical tsundere voice archetype for her. In the show itself though it's not nearly as aggressive and the inflection overall feels very true to her character. Everyone else's voices were excellently done! Those two are just the ones that surprised me in a good way. I also love love loved seeing the scene at the arcade that wasn't there in the manga. It just flowed so seamlessly and gave me more character moments with everyone which is exactly what I want. Anime please give me more of this in the future I will eat this up like candy. I want to do an anime/manga comparison sometime for fun but that's for another post. The opening/ending are both very fucking cute. I don't much care for the song choice but the animation for them both is perfect. I also love the way the two connect with the dancing aspect. In the opening in particular each pair is: Suo is as cool and collect as always while Tokiwa is high key embarrassed and having a time (tm)

Hagi and Kohaku who are both very bewildered (Hagi is definitely having another internal crisis) but doing their best

Asagi and Fuji who are just vibing together having fun

They also then do a really cool ending sequence with the girls in casual attire and the boys as plushies that also is just a great showing of their relationships. Kohaku choosing Hagi out via claw machine as a callback to that little dog he gives her during their first meeting and in the way that neither of them really appears to be the others type when it comes to attraction but are choosing to pursue something with each other for vairous reasons (spoilers but not so obvious with kohaku at this point but story definitely is leaning in that direction). In that regard Kohaku's nervousness is a really cute thing.

Then you get Fuji at the convention hall floor with Asagi sitting on her table when she pats his head. Really showing his dedication to helping her with her passion while showing Fuji's reserved way of expressing affection. For me it's also a fun way of showcasing his ignorance of what she actually draws XD

Notably, Suo is the only one of the girls still in drag- and spoilers ahead in this but that is most certainly with purpose. She's the one who changes her persona the most drastically between work and casual life with none of the struggle Kohaku has. As the manga goes on it's also incredibly clear that Suo keeps many walls up between herself and the people around her. And even when approaching Tokiwa, she is far more outgoing/pushy when masc presenting rather than fem presenting. Even in this shot, they're at the bar, her job, where she can be safe to express her interest under the disguise of her work persona coming on a little strong. But when left to her own devices, she just wants to watch Tokiwa fondly, not even reaching out to him or anything. (When are we getting the explanation for why Suo fell for Tokiwa so hard PLEASE i am on my hands and fucking knees)

Overall the anime is 11/10 I am so in love and am waiting eagerly for episode 2. I'm also so excited to see more fans who find this story via the anime because yes it deserves so much

[oneandocey]

My short story for @jessiec-writes-fantasy from #wcsecretsanta @writeblrcafe!

Normally I don't post my short stories but I guess I accidentally chose it as an option and I'm not gonna put personal preference over delivering on your secret Santa!

All characters are original

Word count: 1461

(It's quite sloppy as I was super stressed this month but I hope you like it nonetheless and that I could fulfill your request!)

At this point she was starting to get annoyed. She’d been standing by the window for what felt like ages now. The chill early spring air had numbed her skin, her porcelain cheeks now like roses blooming in the melting snow. Granted, she didn’t know exactly how long it had been, but she was sure it wasn’t noon anymore. It was in small moments like these that she missed her eyesight most; if she could see the sun, she would have at least been able to know just how upset she was allowed to be. But even then, she knew she would have waited all the same.

Some few minutes later, she hazarded a guess at 5; he finally showed. She recognized him by the melody of his steps; he’d always said she thought of everything as a song; she’d always blamed him for teaching her to listen like it was one. When finally the rhythm of his footfall stalled, his voice continued the tune. “Hey, Vee!” He was utterly winded. “Come ‘round here often?”.

“It’s my room, Cedric; if I left, father would hang the man that took me.” She’d thought that her annoyance would melt from his warmth like it usually did, but clearly she’d been colder than she expected.

“Okayyy, yup, I deserve that.” He was less excited than usual somehow; something heavy and nervous lay in the air between them, and she wasn’t sure if it had been his bad sense of humor or her snide remark that had started it.

“Ugh, hey, I’m sorry; I really did try to be on time. The old man still needed me to grab some stuff on the way, and you know how it gets in the market.”

“Yeah, no, it’s fine,” but it wasn’t, and she didn’t know.

After a few seconds of painful silence, he finally cut in, “Soooo, gonna let me up?”.

“Oh yeah, sorry, come in.” She said, embarrassed, shuffling away from the window so he could climb it.

After a moment, something heavy hit the floor of her room; at first, she thought it must have been him, but a heavier second thud followed afterwards.

“Ced, I told you to bring a few books, not the whole library.”

“Well, I simply wanted to give you a selection; think of this like a charcuterie board of knowledge!” From that comparison, she was sure that he had never seen a charcuterie board, but she appreciated the gesture no less.

“So, my enlightened pupil, are you ready to be educated?” She was sure that Shakespeare had just rolled over in his grave.

“You’re a terrible teacher, you know?” She challenged him playfully.

“Oh, just the worst, I’m sure.” He parried her barb.

But he wasn’t; Cedric was brilliant. He understood the world, not like a scientist but like a lover. Like he had felt its contours countless times, and now it wasn’t quite so clear where one ended and the other began. 

“Vee? You’re staaaaaaaaring again.” He teased.

“No, I wasn’t! And besides, you know I couldn’t even if I wanted to!” her cheeks flushed.

“So you wanted to?”

“That is so not what I said!” and now the rest of her face followed suit.

He knew her too, her fancies and her moods. Not just how flirtatious barbs could make her turn beet red or his impression of her mother could make her double over from laughing but also that, if she needed it, he would hook his pinky into hers and sit with her when the feelings in her heart were too large to fit through her throat.

“So, what should we start with then?”  he queried, steering the conversation back on course.

“Isn’t the teacher usually one to decide that?” She mocked.

“Hmm, yes, but I am no ordinary teacher, you see! I am—

“The worst?” she asked playfully.

“Precisely! 10 points for the beautiful lady in the front!” She was beginning to blush again. Any conversation with Cedric was a battle of barbs, but this time she knew how to turn the tides of war against him.

“Fine then, play me the song you’ve been writing.” He froze; it had worked.

“Come on, you said I could pick; seems only fair you should honor your side of the deal.” 

“It’s not finished, Vera. You know how I feel about it.” The eloquent duelist from before was gone; his voice now low and timid.

“And you know how I feel about it; come on, I’m sure it’s great!” as much as she loved to return his teasing, her voice was gentle and kind once again. His art was somewhat of a vulnerable spot for him, and she would not make fun of a delicate passion.

Defeatedly he shuffled over to the leather violin case; the heavy click of the latches springing open made her heart flutter. She listened closely to the rustling of wood on velvet, the slight thump of him placing the bow on the strings, and then, as soft as the snowfall outside the window, he began. 

She loved his songs more than the word love can express. To her, the world had always been so far away, something in a glass display at a museum, to be experienced 5 ft away so that no one could steal it. But when Cedric played, it was anything but that, each delicate note like petals in the wind, each vibrato like the footfall of children in the markets. She savored every vibration in the air, tuning herself to their frequency, tasting life through the palette of a boy who knew nothing but love for the world. 

To her this was what it meant to live; perhaps that was sad, but to her there was no purer way to do it. She was sure that, even if she hadn’t been blind, she could never have seen the world like Cedric did, and to her that might have been a worse fate than this.

But just as all things had to, it came to an end too soon.

“You can’t just stop there! That’s torture!” she insisted.

“I told you it was unfinished, Vee; I just haven’t been able to figure out the ending.” his voice tangling in knots with frustration.

She touched his hand, the song's vibration lingering a moment, their frequencies perfectly in tune.

“It’s great, Cedric,” she said softly. “Thank you for showing me.”

He exhaled, his vexation dissipating with his breath. He returned her touch, gently holding her hand in his, tracing the lines.

“You know, I should teach you how to play sometime.”

Softly she tried to pull away, but he would not let her.

“Vee, you love music; please just give it a chance.” He’d pleaded this case to her more times than she could count now. But her answer would always remain the same.

“I can’t, Ced. You understand it all, but I don’t. The notes, the sheets—how exactly am I meant to read them without seeing them?” 

He opened her palm and laid in it something long and wooden, the bow of his violin.

“Like you do the rest of the world.”

Gently he placed the violin in her other hand, guiding it to her clavicle. His touch was electric, his chest rose and fell behind her, warm breath coaxing her on, and with her hands in his, he began to play. 

The feeling was strange, the motions not her own. She wasn’t playing; at best, she was a puppet. She had loved his songs, yes, but playing was entirely alien to her. What if she messed it up, ruined his painting with the brushwork of an amateur? Her thoughts were growing wilder, like waves rising and crashing in a tempest, but all the time he was behind her, a rock in the shoreline. Until he wasn’t. 

She hadn’t noticed it, but his steady presence was gone, his hand still resting on her knee, but he was no longer guiding her. She’d been playing on her own. She couldn’t make heads or tails of it; she had absolutely no idea what she was doing, but somehow it was fine. The melody guided her through the storm; she was surfing the waves, not drowning in them. It was a thin line, a finite difference, but a difference nonetheless. Finally she could feel the vibrations firsthand, feel life echoing through her like it did the body of the violin; she had become an instrument for the world; she had broken the glass display and touched the paint, still fresh, now dripping off her fingers.

When she finally stopped her playing, she was buzzing; never had she lived quite like that. And it must have been showing, because Cedric, in his usual cocky tone, whispered into her ear. 

“Best teacher ever.”

[mizuki-foreshadowing]

What's On Your Mind - Exciting Picnic, Episode 3

Mizuki and Ena arrive at the highlands with Airi and Shizuku, and they have a lunch Airi made specially for them. Ena tells Shizuku she enjoyed More More Jump's recent dance practice stream, because the way Shizuku kept trying every time she failed encouraged her to keep trying with her artwork.

When Shizuku says that makes her really start to feel like she's an idol who can deliver hope, Mizuki gives us a glimpse into her own outlook.

This contrasts directly with Nightcord at 25:00's stated goal; Kanade started the band so that sad yet hopeful songs can find people who need them, and one day even save someone that way. Mizuki arranges the music videos, and aside from a few chance comments from Mafuyu, seems to do better for herself than Ena does with the artwork. (Ena's narrative is that she's bad at art despite loving it, but she's an unreliable narrator in being her own worst critic.)

Mizuki can't imagine how she might go about bringing hope to someone, not because she doesn't, as part of her work with N25, but because she doesn't have any herself. Central to Mizuki's character is the way she runs away from her problems. Whenever things get too personal or too serious, she finds an excuse to run off or a way to change the topic; she even does it in this scene. Ena's arc in this story is standing her ground against Mizuki putting on her best show of everything being fine, and she sees it for what it is.

Back in the Nightcord at 25:00 main story, Episode 18, Mizuki says something shocking when Kanade and Ena are trying to get Mafuyu to want to live. She says that the three of them can say whatever they want but ultimately the choice of whether Mafuyu wants to live or not is hers alone to make, and she should be able to disappear if she wants to.

She follows this with saying that she's come to understand Mafuyu and see herself in her, and that it'd make her sad to lose somebody who can actually understand the way Mizuki feels so soon after gaining them. But, Mizuki has no hope to offer Mafuyu. While Mafuyu feels all of her pain and balances it with Kanade's hope, Mizuki does everything she can to lessen the pain of her own day-to-day, because she doesn't have hope to balance it.

In Secret Distance, Episode 8, Mizuki's stomach is turning on the train as she realizes that despite all her running and all her efforts to forget about a future she's given up on to have fun in the present, that she wants a future now, with people who might become lifelong friends. Back in middle school she gave up on herself ever being able to form bonds like that, but learned at the cherry tree at the abandoned school in Episode 7 that that's no longer true of herself.

Hope would mean telling people she thought would drift out of her life her secret so that she can form a deeper bond emotionally with them, her identity as a trans girl the source of much of her pain and joy. It means letting down the same cheerful mask that Mafuyu had kept up back when she kept her own emotional distance from the others, and finally let them see her pain and maybe even be able to help ease it. Mizuki's always run from her pain, finding ways to be happy and have fun in the moment. Hope is the painful, messy, and much truer solution, a step that she's still afraid to take.

[kentdreaming]

Ribs: a Roy Kent story

Series: Ribs

Pairing: Roy Kent x OC

Summary: Natalia's past is now quickly becoming her present. Might as well try to make light of it all.

Word Count: 2.3k

Warnings: swearing but that's about it

A/N: I'm so so so grateful for all of the love already for the first chapter! I'm pretty rusty in the writing world, so be patient as I get my footing again. I just love Roy Kent so much, yall. Also, yes I used an old Lorde song for the title of this series in the year 2023, nature is healing

gif from @winterscaptain

Chapter 2

His eyes were so dark. A deep warm brown bore hard into her sharp green for a moment. Natalia blinked hard, hoping, wondering, if this was a dream. A glimmer ghosted across his eyes before it disappeared behind some furrowed and bushy eyebrows. “Natalia,” He nodded quickly. She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could even utter a sound, Roy had pushed past her and quickly through the photographers giving them obscene gestures and a slew of “Fuck off”s. Natalia scoffed, dumbfounded. She quickly shook it off and squared her shoulders before stepping onto the red carpet. The cameras and reporters roared when she stepped into frame. “Talia, Talia, who are you wearing!?” “Talia, over here!” “Talia–” 

She squirmed under the flashing lights and cacophony of sound. Talia tried her best to soothe herself in the moment, playing it off with her hard rocker energy and striking a few poses to appease the cameras. After a pose with devil horns and her tongue out, she began her descent toward the ballroom. 

“Is it true you’re now a minority owner of AFC Richmond!?” A reporter yelled. She stopped, flipping her hair over her shoulder for one final money shot with the response, “Yes, darling. It is true. But I must be off to donate to children in need, toodles!” 

Natalia stomped into the ballroom and was quickly overwhelmed with the crowds. Not wanting to bother Rebecca as she was clearly in her own groove, she found Ted at the bar. “I’ll have the same as him, love,” Natalia rapped on the bar beside Ted as she heard him order a triple of whiskey. “Well I’ll be,” Ted smiled, quickly admiring her outfit, “You sure do clean up nicely!” 

“Thank you, Ted,” Natalia smiled, leaning over to fix his tie. Quickly she felt eyes on her from somewhere else in the room. “Everything alright, Mr. Triple shot?” “Oh y’know when you just see through someone?” Ted shrugged. “Ah, I see you met Rupert,” Natalia nodded as their two drinks were delivered. “You know him?”

“It’s hard not to know him in these circles, but I only know him to be particularly fucking  disgusting. You ever heard how Rebecca found out about his cheating?” 

“Mm mmm,” Ted shook his head as he drained his whiskey. Natalia raised her eyebrows, taking a long slow sip, not breaking eye contact with the American. Ted took a moment to register what she meant. She felt the eyes again, but she ignored it.

“You?” Ted finally put two and two together. 

“Yup,” Natalia nodded, knocking the bar and ordering another round, “He extended me an exclusive invite to Bones and Honey, thinking he could win me over that way… Little did he know I’m already a fuckin’ member. So, I promptly showed up, squashed a morsel of that ego of his and then quickly left to find Rebecca.” “Well, I sure am happy you made that call,” Ted smiled, clinking his glass with yours, “otherwise I never woulda had this opportunity. So I s’pose I have you to thank then.” Natalia smiled, relaxed for the first time all day and patted Ted on the shoulder, “Pleasure is all mine, Ted.” The two enjoyed some chit chat at the bar and seemed to be having a good time. Roy Kent, however, was not. Not only was he sitting at the table with Jamie fucking Tartt, but everytime he had glanced in Natalia’s direction, she seemed to have been getting closer and closer to the gaffer. His hands clenched into hard fists under the table. He hadn’t seen her in decades and there she is chatting up that annoying American. He couldn’t understand why he was getting so angry. But then he saw her and Ted rise from their spots at the bar and make their way toward the table, just as he was getting ushered off to be brought up on stage. 

Natalia reached the table as Keeley Jones was making her way back. A small squeal emitted from both the small women, the two quickly hugged each other.

“Talia! You looking fucking incredible, babes!” Keeley squealed, running her way to her in her golden gown. She kissed Natalia’s cheeks and ogled her. 

“Your tits are fucking fantastic,” Keeley breathed staring at the deep cut V in the front of her dress. Natalia just laughed, rocking her head back.

Keeley quickly dismissed the young woman named Bex before having a quiet but heated discussion with Jamie. Roy was the next player to be auctioned off. It soon became clear that Keeley was now playing Jamie’s game from earlier at the auction. Frankly, Natalia was sick of it. Sick of seeing Roy being in the middle of it all. Plus, she wanted to have fun anyway. Right before Rupert auctioned off Roy to an old bitty who was promising to make his night one to remember, Natalia stood up with a paddle. “10,000 pounds,” Natalia proclaimed, the crowd quickly filled with commotion and whispers. Roy’s eyes widened underneath the spotlight. “Well, well,” Rupert smiled, a hint of distaste in his features as he realized who it was that bid, “Sold! To Miss Talia Forrest! Just a couple of Sunderland natives out on the town, then? Tell me, what does £10,000 unlock in the Roy Kent Dating Package?” 

“Who knows, but what else is a ‘washed up rockstar’ to do with all this royalty money? For the children, right Rupert?” Natalia quipped back, eliciting a scattering of chuckles in the audience, a challenge in her eyes, “Plus, Roy’s been put through enough having to consider a night with Cheryl over here. Hi there, Cheryl, darling.” 

“Natalia Forrest, everybody,” Rupert announced, “Don’t you hurt his ego too much,” gesturing to Roy to exit the stage. Roy promptly rushed off stage, moving at bullet speed, he stormed past the crowd as the auction came to a close. Without much acknowledgement, he grabbed Natalia by her arm, dragging her along with him. “Whoa, Roy–” Natalia stammered as he dragged her off to the quiet area of the abandoned sidebar. 

“Don’t fucking do that again,” Roy growled. 

Natalia’s eyes widened in shock, “Roy— I was just—“

“Between Keeley using me as some stupid fucking jealousy game with that prick and you auctioning out of fucking pity— I fucking hate it.” he bit out. 

“I-“ Natalia started, ready to be defensive. Instead she just looked at him. She hadn’t seen him in so long, and even though she wanted nothing more than to wrap him in a hug, she sighed, “I’m really sorry, Roy. I was just sick of Jamie and Keeley’s stupid fucking game.”

Roy took a moment, his eyes searching hers for any sign of deceit. But all he saw were big, apologetic soft green eyes staring back up at him. With heels, she only stood about 5’5”, but there was a time he remembered where they were roughly the same height. A pang of sadness pulled in his chest. 

“Thank you,” he nodded. 

As he turned to leave, Natalia caught his arm, “Roy wait.”

He paused, turning around to face her again, the feeling of her hand on his arm sent a long forgotten shock through his body. 

“You owe me a £10,000 date,” Natalia said smirking up at him, “So you better make it fucking worth it.” 

He gave a soft growl and stormed away. Natalia’s heart sank into her gut again as he disappeared. She was quickly distracted by the sound of Rebecca introducing a very last minute musical guest, a street busker, and she was immediately blown away by the young man’s performance. Natalia rushed into the crowd and bounced around to the music with who she was assuming was her team, and by the description Rebecca had given her earlier, danced hard with Coach Beard.

As the night wound to a close, Rebecca found Natalia speaking with Cam Cole, Ted, and Beard. Talia had just finished handing Cam a few business cards and took a photo with him for her personal social platforms to promote the performer when Rebecca approached. 

“Hello gentlemen,” Rebecca smiled nervously, “Natalia, I was- uhm- wondering if you would care to join me and–” 

“I’m fuckin’ in,” Talia responded.

“I didn’t even finish–”

“I will do anything with you,” Natalia reassured, “Plus, something tells me Keeley is involved.” Glancing over Rebecca’s shoulder to see Keeley trying to wave with two champagne bottles cradled in her arms.

Natalia turned back to the three men, “My chariot awaits gentlemen. It’s been a fuckin’ blast. Cam, please do give me a call, I see a lot of fucking potential in you.” 

“Jeez louise, Nat,” Ted laughed, “You swear just like Roy. Hey, have you met Roy?” 

“I have, Ted,” Natalia said a bit sharper than she meant, recovering, “I bid on him, remember?”

Beard gave Talia a pointed look and a feeling went down her spine. He seemed to know something “Anyways, see you lot around, yeah?” Natalia asked, hugging and leaving a kiss on each man’s cheek. 

“Don’t be a stranger,” Ted beamed, “It’d be fun to have you around more.” 

With that, Natalia dashed over to the increasingly impatient women and they found their way to a bike taxi where they squeezed close together and drank the night away. Once they had made it to Rebecca’s flat (which was one hell of a workout for that poor bicyclist), Natalia left him enough money to pay rent twice over and the three stumbled inside. “Get these bloody fucking things off me,” Rebecca groaned as she kicked off her heels, giving her ankles a soft rub. Keeley and Natalia soon follow.

“Shit I forgot how tiny you both are,” Rebecca laughed, “like a couple of elves.”

“Oi!” Keeley and Natalia yelled together. Immediately the two started cackling. 

Once the women had settled down, they drank away at the wine and all cozied up on Rebecca’s couch, which was somehow even more comfortable than the one in her office. In true teenage-girl-sleepover fashion, they all huddled around and turned on a movie that was quickly discarded for immediate gossip of the night.

“God, Rupert is such a dick,” Keeley groaned, throwing her head back.

“Amen,” Natalia drunkenly lifted her glass in agreement.

“Say,” Keeley swiveled, her big eyes a bit droopy, “What’s the deal with the $10,000 bid tonight.” 

Natalia was taken aback by the sudden switch in topic. “For the children?” She mumbled unconvincingly. 

“Oh bullshit,” Rebecca rolled her eyes, “£10,000?”

“Rebecca, when have I not thrown money out for donations?”

“Natalia,” Rebecca lightly challenged, a knowing look, and a raised brow, “Only when it benefits you.”

Fuck. Keeley gasped, “You wanna shag Roy!” 

She couldn’t tell which was the culprit, but between the sudden and drunken interrogation, and the obscene amount of alcohol running through her, she couldn’t help the faint blush that tinged the tip of her nose and ears. Keeley and Rebecca let out a couple of squeals jumping in their seats. Natalia quickly rolled her eyes, giving her the best scowl she could muster. After a moment, however, she softened, her fingers lighting dancing around the rim of her wine glass, eyes intently looking at her own movements.

“It’s not like that,” she mumbled, a soft smile on her lips. God, why do I go so soft around these two? Both other women noticed Natalia’s shift in demeanor. They also immediately scooted closer, worried but aching to know more. Talia gave a quick glance up to two pairs of very expectant eyes. With a sigh and a slight roll of her eyes, Natalia finally responded.

“Roy and I grew up together,” she admitted. It felt good to let someone else know. Their eyes widened at the new knowledge. Natalia continued, the liquor prompting the words, “Grew up in the same, shitty and rundown flats– the community would always joke that no matter how poor we all were, the place was magic to be able to produce two famous kids."

At this, Natalia let out a soft chuckle, mind a million miles away as she rambled on, “Due to both of us being just wee kids, we were expected to continue on in schooling. We were both put into the same tutoring system.” 

“Oh my god, childhood sweethearts!” Keeley squealed gently, earning a side look from Rebecca. 

Natalia responded with a dry laugh, “Hardly. A few years past and we were closer than ever,” she explained, “but then between Roy’s hard fuckin’ work paying off in the football clubs, and my music career exploding into my first tour, we drifted apart. I haven’t seen him since I was 16 during his debut game. The next time I saw him was today.” 

Rebecca and Keeley sat dumbfounded, and grateful that she was so open with them. They stared at Natalia dreamy-eyed with the childhood nostalgia. “But that ain’t the Roy Kent I fuckin’ know,” Talia stated. A deep sadness tugged at her gut, as she finished the rest of her wine. She shook her head, “Nah. The Roy I know was soft, and gentle, and always tried to make me laugh.” 

After a beat, Talia shrugged, looking at the time. Rebecca and Keeley had eventually received the message and they all proceeded to get ready for bed as they all managed to sleep quite comfortably in Rebecca’s bed. 

Roy laid in his bed, staring at the ceiling. He couldn’t fucking sleep. Anytime he’d close his eyes, she should pop up behind his closed eyes. It was driving him fucking crazy. He growled, reaching over for his phone. He pulled her name up from his contacts and started to draft a message. He had tried and failed multiple times writing out something simple.

“Fuck it,” he growled, slamming his phone back onto the nightstand before rolling over and tried to force himself to sleep. Trainin’ is going to be a fucking bitch tomorrow.

[imadethisaccounttpostonething]

i have opinions on half the new songs from hazbin and i'm telling them to the void known as the internet SPOILERS

don't worry guys. i know, i know you've ALL been waiting for MY opinion on the last two episodes- me, someone who doesn't even have a pfp picked out for this blog yet and whos only post is a bad edit i posted just to get the hyperfixation thought out of my head but- you've waited long eneugh. i'm here! i'm FINALLY going to share all my thoughts on the last two episodes of Hazbin Hotel... well, okay, mainly the four songs cause that's more my expertice but. whatever. buckle in bestie, we're going for a ride...

like i said, i'm mostly a song girlie, and as established you don't know who i am so me going "oh i thought that one line was cute" probably won't matter to you. so imma skip right to the first song, "Out For Love." AND HI! HELLO! I HAVE OPINIONS! THERE ALL NEGATIVE! okay, that's not true. i like... the person who plays Camilla's voice?? i think she sounds... nice? but oh my god this song was just. such a missed oppurtunity?

i already had to cut this section down cause i spent so much time making a list of what purpose musical songs tend to serve, but considering my point is that "Out For Love" doesn't do any of those things, i don't think i should waste so much breath on it. like. every form of media has their pros and cons on how to deliver inforation. books you can have the characters full un filtered thoughts. movies you can see all their facial reactions and little moments. musicals? in musicals, you get a song about them. and these songs, espicially in a show with a tight 22 minute an episode deadline and only 8 episodes total, EVERY song has to pull its weight and teach either us the auidence something or them the characters. and by the latter half of the season, it really needs to do both! and Vaggie, is a character who DESPERATLY needed a character establishing song and... didn't really get one. yeah, theres "Whatever It Takes" but.. she has to split that with Carmilla, who... really REALLY didn't need both the songs in that episode. everything we learned about in her half of the song could have just been a pretty quick conversation with Zariel. and as she tells him that she had to do whatever it takes to protect those we love, THEN we go back to Vaggie and she has her whole own song capatlizing on a similar theme, but also.. more? cause. we KNOW Vaggie loves Charlie. that's like. one of the few things we do know about her. and the thing i hate about "Out For Love" is that it doesn't tell us anything else about Vaggie or even Carmilla! AND IT DOESN'T TEACH VAGGIE ANYTHING! in "Whatever It Takes" Vaggie says she'll be Charlie's armor, which is probably the biggest piece of information we get about Vaggie as a person and who she is. cause she said armor. not a sword, that cuts the danger away. not a partner, that helps their lover through the danger. but rather, armor, that stops the danger from hurting their love, even if that ends up damaging the armor. what she could have learned from Carmilla, and what i think they were trying to get at but didn't, is she has to fight like she has something worth going home for? she can't be Charlie's armor cause she isn't indestructable. if she keeps going to take every hit for Charlie she's going to crumble. if THIS was a duet between Vaggie and Carmilla where Vaggie comes in with her martyr-istic opinions about herself towards Charlie, and Carmilla comes in like "girl. no." THAT would have been just. so much. better? cause with how it is, wtf did Vaggie learn???? like i get Carmilla tught her her fighting strat, but idc about that. the song came across as teaching her a moral lesson but it didn't. it's been WELL established that Vaggie loves Charlie. god. i just. really wish it was better. also, the chorus tries to rhyme "If you want to fight without gloves you better be fighting for love" and i just. like okay homie.

Rosie's advice to Charlie about her relationship was fine and all but god why didn't Charlie and Vaggie have a fucking song about it?? like, i'll get into it in a second but my saphic ass has been waiting all season to get my lesbian duet and i got a thirty second reprise of someone elses song instead of the apology/acceptence duet where they reaffirm their love or whatever. and i'm blaming Rosie. ... which i instantly feel bad about cause i really like Rosie and the song she got out of Charlie but. i have to blame someone so. sorry girlie. i don't really have a lot to say about "Ready For This" mostly cause i've listened to the trailer so many times i just think of it as the trailer song? idk, i did like it but it didn't really hit me as much as i thought it would. i mostly wrote this cause i was so mad about Vaggie's two songs and the other two i think are fine. but i do think Alastor's part was really good cause it helps forshadow whatever the fuck is going on with him. love that creepy bastard.

uggggggh. okay. listen. before i say anything else, i want it well established i'm gay af. i came out of the womb with my Doc Martens and thirty different flannels on and ready for action. my hair is short, i played soccer, insert whatever any other saphic/lesbian stereotype you want. go crazy. i've heard worse from people i know better. you can't hurt me. my point is... i was really hoping to get a Charlie and Vaggie duet, and.. i really wasn't expecting one. so when Vaggie walked into the room with Charlie and music started playing i got so excited....... only for it to be thirty seconds long and it being the reprise of Lucifer's father daughter song. like. am i the only one noticing the pattern of Vaggie picking up a second half of songs about a parent loving a child but applying it to Charlie instead? like... i thought this was cute!! but. there was so much they could have sung about to each other or establish for one another or prepare for or just. do. but it was... a reprise of Lucifer's song??? when it ended, i audily said alone in my living room. "awww. i mean. i'll take it". and that's. pretty much my thoughts still i guess but a little more bitterly? like. Dusk and Angel Dust got a whole duet about being losers together (which was also great and i do ship them at least a little) but the canon and supposedly most developed ship got. a. thirty second reprise as their only duet in the whole season. yay.....

finale was good! i also think Nifty killing Adam in the exact same fashion she stabbed all those already dead angels was like. the most fitting way for him to die if not by Vaggie's hand, and sense Vaggie already got at least slight vengence against Lute, this felt good. OH ANOTHER THING ABOUT "Out For Love"! THEY KEEP SAYING VAGGIE IS CLEARLY ALL ABOUT VENGENCE WHEN SHE VERY CLEARLY ISN'T??? LIKE NEVER ONCE HAVE WE ESTABLISHED VAGGIE IS IN IT FOR THE VENGENCE! ITS BEEN ALL ABOUT CHARLIE. BUT THE SONG IS ALL "OH STOP BEING ABOUT VENGENCE AND KILL FOR CHARLIE" AND IT JUST- okay yeah whatever we've established i don't like that song, i need to calm down. i'm gonna listen to my thirty second saphic reprise that i'll take i guess. maybe i'll share more opinions when i've processed anything better. maybe i won't. peace out homie.

[oshinohoshi]

Oshi no Ko Chapter 155 Thoughts

The chapter title is Happy End! Well, not for Hikaru. He's so broken we don't even see his face

The framing of this as the end of Ruby's revenge is interesting but um... what revenge? We haven't seen Ruby thinking about revenge since she lost her black hoshigan. This would hit a lot harder if Ruby had done anything lately to show she cared about revenge

It's a real shame because Ruby's lines in Ch 115 when she was doing the impromptu audition with Frill and Akane gave me chills

I still dream about the day my mother died, even now... will everyone I love end up dying?... I want to go to where everyone is. I want to die too. That's powerful stuff! Of course she would want revenge. But then she realizes Gorou is alive and everything is fine again (??)

As for Ruby's forgiveness, unfortunately that happened off the page (sadly that's become a running theme lately with how rushed things feel to me). Her conversation with Hikaru in Ch 147 is the closest we got to seeing her make that decision

And what exactly did she do in her acting to deliver that forgiveness? I'm tired of being told about it, I want to see it

I'm not sure why Ruby was chasing after Hikaru in this chapter with double black hoshigan if she was all set to forgive him but  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Anyway, none of that matters because Miyako is back, hugs are back, Aqua is crying in his mother's arms and... OK BUT WHERE WAS MIYAKO UNTIL NOW? WHY DID YOU FORGET HER, AKASAKA? Never mind, sorry, this was an adorable moment

Someone finally remembered Yura Katayose. I really hope it's shown how Aqua realized she had anything to do with this

Nino jumpscare! I am obsessed with Nino's obsession with Ai. The toxic yuri is off the charts and I'm eating it up

Look at this poster. Nino could have simply cut her and Ai out of it but no, she took the time to cross out and scribble over the other B Komachi girls, presumably for daring to breathe the same air as Ai

If you have not, you need to read 45510 (translated by aihoshiino) which is not only the basis for the lyrics in Idol but a deep dive into Nino's psyche. It was obvious by this point, but we now canonically know that Nino is the narrator in 45510 because of the panel in this chapter where she hits the delete button

Wait, hold up, Nino is using an mp3 player? My god, she really is stuck in time isn't she

She has trash bags all over her house because this woman is a shut in who does nothing but watch videos of Ai, listen to old B Komachi songs, and stare at her poster. Honestly? Same. I see you, Nino, and we can be delusional together

I believe in another life that Nino healed herself with a lot of therapy and a yoga retreat, stopped putting Ai on a pedestal, embraced her sexuality, and confessed to Ai. They're now living with the twins in a small house on the outskirts of Tokyo. Nino writes a mommy blog called "My dream life with precocious twins: me, myself, and Ai"

Get it? See what I did there? Okay...

[mrsnancywheeler]

OMG billy dunne renaissance? I used to pray for times like this🙏

Ofc I have to bring up Miss Swift everytime, but ur blurbs about him def remind me of Is It Over Now?

But specifically these lyrics:

“You dream of my mouth before it called you a lying traitor. You search in every model’s bed for something greater”

“And did you think I didn't see you? There were flashing lights, at least I had the decency to keep my nights out of sight. Only rumors 'bout my hips and thighs and my whispered sighs. Oh, Lord, I think about jumping off of very tall somethings just to see you come running and say the one thing I've been wanting. But no.”

OOO and (spoilers if anyone else hasn’t seen the show) about your blurb about eddie pining for her, if she pulls a camila and actually sleeps with him bc she’s hurting abt billy, this line would actually hit:

“Baby, was it over when she laid down on your couch?Was it over when he unbuttoned my blouse?”

But also!☝️There is another blondie who’s songs i think fit perfectly. Miss Sabrina Carpenter 😌 Specially Tornado Warnings, Vicious, How Many Things, and Read Your Mind!! Ahh so good!

“Don't understand how quickly we get right back in our rhythm without missing a step. And logically, the last thing I should have on my mind, but I want you there sometimes. I guess maybe that's why I'm lying to my therapist. I keep saying things like, ‘I never saw him and we never kissed.’”

“You don't feel remorse, you don't feel the effects. 'Cause you don't think you hurt me if you wish me the best. I shoulda known all along, I was only the next one to take your love songs as a promise.” !!!!!!!!!!!!

“I consider you, I'm not trying to. It doesn't matter whether not I want to. I can't help it, it's a habit. Your corner in my mind is well established”

“You say that you need to be alone, but night and day, want me at your beck and call. You say you know that you might be crossin' the line. Wastin' all our time. To think that we could be casual. You're not my friend and, baby, you never were. Why the fuss? If you say you just wanna be mine. I can't read your mind”

But yeah HAHA thank you for feeding us billy dunne content <3

-🦅

I'm here to deliver times like this 💋

yes I agree they are serving major is it over now? except it's ever really over

she's an attacker, she does not mince words about how she feels in the moment and is attacking full force, if he's a lying traitor she's saying it, but on the flip side she's also the type to always tell him how good he's doing, soft kisses, adoration at the best of times. and he's always got more groupies lined up, but none of them compare. and the media tearing her apart as the younger girlfriend of billy dunne who has nothing else except a rich dad and famous boyfriend to her name.

I totally believe she slept with eddie at least once and felt terrible about it because she feels like she's betrayed billy even though it was during one of their off periods and he constantly cheats on her. at first it wasn't necessarily sleeping with others, but I think coming up to the final full breakdown it becomes that and she can't take it anymore. but it just makes eddie pine for her more.

yes yes yes my girl sabrina

her and billy have venomous fights where he breaks her down and she tries to bite back, but then the moment he calls or shows up or she is suddenly at a rehearsal they're acting like nothing happened. seamlessly back to being in each other's arms, kisses, laughter, leading up to ofc another meltdown.

and billy never apologizes, not until after rehab and everything, but usually it's just songs and acting like nothing wrong happened at all. and he's not consciously trying to hurt her, but he is.

and she can't stop thinking about him and be can't not think about her. she can try to move on but it'll always be billy and he can say there are others, but he'll always end up wanting her instead.

and the way he calls her his girl but won't actually put a label on it and always says she's not special when he's upset. he also expects her to always be around for him and gets pissy when she's not even though he won't say that they're really really together. and it's so fucking confusing for her.

ofc pookie ❤️❤️❤️

[audioaperture]

The Dangerous Summer - Chicago 7.12.24

There are bands that consistently deliver remarkable albums yet somehow slip under the radar. For me, The Dangerous Summer epitomizes this phenomenon. With a flawless discography, they've never released a bad album.

Music hits harder when it comes from a deeply personal place, using real names and locations. This authenticity is why artists like Taylor Swift resonate so widely. AJ Perdomo of The Dangerous Summer channels this approach masterfully, singing with raw, unfiltered emotion. His intensity is palpable—every note, every lyric, you feel it as if it's your own story.

My journey with The Dangerous Summer began with "No One's Gonna Need You More," a quintessential emo anthem from their 2011 album "War Paint." Delving deeper into "War Paint" and their earlier album "Reach for the Sun," I discovered two masterpieces where every track stands out. By this time I thought for sure I was the last to hear about them, who could ignore such perfection?

Following "War Paint" were the equally stellar "Golden Record" and their self-titled album, which emerged after a hiatus. This album features my favorite track, "This Is Life," a song that captures my feelings better than I ever could (which I expand upon later)

And then came "Mother Nature"—an emo album designed for stadiums. This record not only stands out in their catalog but in the entire genre. It’s innovative and fresh while staying true to their essence. In 2019, it was on constant repeat for me. The transition between "Starting Over / Slow Down" is pure auditory delight, a seamless blend that’s absolutely addictive.

"Way Down," another gem from "Mother Nature," pushes Perdomo’s emotional delivery to new heights, taking that emotional ten to eleven. The album is packed with standout tracks like "Blind Ambition," "Bring Me Back to Life," "Virginia," and "Where Were You When the Sky Opened Up," each one a high point.

After "Mother Nature" came the EP "All That Is Left of the Blue Sky," featuring "Fuck Them All," ironically one of their most (sonically) uplifting and inspirational songs. Their next album, "Coming Home," continued their streak of excellence, and their latest release, "Gravity," is nothing short of fantastic.

"Gravity" opens with "I Feel More Like Myself When I'm Losing It," a track that speaks to the universal artist experience. It's incredibly relatable content.

The Dangerous Summer is more than a fantastic band—they're a band that pours their soul into every song, every piece of artwork, every conversation, and every social media post. Their passion and dedication shine through, making every live show an unforgettable experience. If only they could play a 30-song set, the world would be a better place.

Do yourself a favor and spend time listening to the Dangerous Summer.

Finally, I thought I’d share the video & lyrics to “This is Life,” it’s a short song with no traditional song structure. 3 verses and the chorus is at the end.  It’s concise and shares the sentiment I often feel as an artist and human. For me, the song is about overcoming obstacles, finding your true self, feeling free, letting go of the past, and loving life. I feel inspired after every listen.

There's a change In the wild Shot in waves Pushing time And I see the days Turn to night And taking in all my peripheral thoughts into feeling It's a pulse inside my lungs I see sky where once was ceiling Leaving the fact I can change the world Cause I think I could You used to come my way I used to feel like I could not open up But now I am free

It's a shame This is life With everything at our disposal While we stayed inside Most our lives Hoping to God for a better one until we die I used to hold that chain I used to carry the weight of all my problems here with me But now I come through But now, now I come through

It's awake For the rush The promise of what we all want if we pull from inside Close your eyes The moment is taking me closer, it keeps me alive I used to run away I used to hide from these walls that gave me life But now I can breathe

Do you remember me like I remember you?