#it's classic self recognition through the other (derogatory)

[definitely-not-a-wasp]

Y’know what? I think there should have been MORE Fang Ari rivalry.

Because Ari knows that he and Max are siblings from the beginning. He never makes much of an effort to hide that. And he also knows, between himself and Max, Jeb will always pick Max. He doesn’t understand why, and he doesn’t understand that Jeb’s version of love is going to hurt no matter what, but he knows that Jeb loves Max more than him. That’s fine, because it has to be fine, because he’s not allowed to be angry at Jeb.

But the flip side of knowing Max is his sister is knowing that he’s her brother. And knowing that he’s not her only brother. And knowing that, between himself and her siblings— this specific sibling, more often than not, because Max and Fang have always depended on each other— she will pick her sibling every. Single. Time. Jeb picking Max is fine, he’s okay with that, but there’s no way in hell that Max should be allowed to pick this asshole over her flesh and blood brother.

(Max does not know that Ari is her brother. Ari is seven, so this fact is irrelevant.)

So yeah. He can be mad at his sister all he wants, and he is, he’s always angry, but he hates Fang. This person who got to spend a whole lifetime with his sister, who keeps turning her against her family, who she so obviously loves more than she loves her father or her real brother. Things would be a lot better for all of them if Fang didn’t exist, and if Fang is alone and in pain and terrified when they die? Well, that’s just a bonus.

And on Fang’s side... this seven-year-old with sharp teeth keeps trying to kill them. They try not to think about how they nearly fell out of the sky, or their hospital stay, or how their body still hurts and will never be the same, but it creeps up on them at night, like bile in their throat, and Ari doesn’t stop trying to kill them. Once is a coincidence, twice is a pattern, three times is a vendetta, and Fang is not going to lay down and die. Maybe killing Ari will finally let them sleep at night.

Max treats them like a monster when they try to hurt Ari. Truly hurt him, not just to incapacitate, because she knows Ari’s name and that means he’s more important than all of the other Erasers they put in the ground. Never mind that all of them were also kids, and that this specific kid keeps trying to kill Fang. And he can’t be mad at Max, because they need them and Max to be okay, they need to stick together, so that’s all the more reason to get their would-be-murderer out of the picture.

So they keep trying to kill each other, until Max (finally, finally, Ari knew it could happen) sides with Ari, and Fang leaves. Ari always knew that he could only be Max’s favorite if Fang was out of the picture, and Fang only now realizes that they’re playing for favorites, and they’re not a seven-year-old, they know that’s not how the world works, but—

But they know that they can’t both live under the same roof. Knows that Ari has a date on the back of his neck that marks him for death, and that Fang has been dancing around death for so long that it’s going to come to collect eventually, so it’s just a matter of who cracks first.

Fang leaves, because they were never good at dealing with conflict. If Max has decided that blood means more than they do, then that’s her choice.

Ari dies. Not too long after, Fang dies, and apparently neither are allowed to rest because the next time they see each other, they’re both breathing, even if neither would call each other alive. Neither would call themselves alive, but if they say that out loud then they have to admit that something’s wrong, so it’s a whole lot easier to look at the other and call them a ghost that needs to be put down.

They keep trying to kill each other. They somehow get more violent, more bloody, because neither really remember how to fear death anymore. They’re both on borrowed time, and there’s no point in being precious with it. And if one of them gets a good enough shot in and puts the other in the ground, then that means one of their bodies will be put right.

(It feels like some divine joke, or perhaps a punishment for a sin neither of them committed, that the one person who would understand what it feels like— that they’re moving and speaking but never actually came back, that something pulled them out of their broken bodies and shoved them back in all wrong— would be the same person who they hate.)

[alangdorf]

A couple various Magolor outfits (Clash cause I realized I only had half finished sketches of that outfit and also Yukari Yakumo from Touhou cosplay for fun) and also Oh hey yeah that thing!

Ummm let’s see, words are hard right now but I should probably give my explaining myself spiel and I’ve already been putting off this post for like a month and a half. Clash outfit was fairly self-evident; I thought it looked good with the red added (apple colors hehe) and I of course couldn’t resist throwing some classic lolita in there. Unlike his usual outfit there’s not space for his wings to stretch out in the back bc Clash is like. Theoretically it’s chill but they’ve got a lotta post-traumatic stress/paranoia/insecurity that morphs into weird tension with the main gang back in the usual universe and then doesn’t fully start getting resolved until after Star Allies (I have other sketches of this outfit - and just other Magolor doodles in general; particularly I’ve been trying to figure out digitigrade leg posing - but I don’t feel like posting them here so I guess you can find them at um. Kirby live radio wiki community feed)

Yukari outfit I had the idea for cause I was thinking abt qi lolita again. Not much to say aside from I figured out why they don’t ever give her the parasol with this dress; it is a distressing amount of light pink to deal with and between that and the pose and parasol shape I sweated my way through most of this piece lol

Aaand Magolor Epilogue a.k.a. self-recognition through the other (derogatory) ….. TWO!! I had the idea for Master Crown boss to bear an uncanny resemblance to 2nd phase Magolor/Magolor Soul a long time ago but like. Turns out it was scarily close already; I just had to add a head and a couple fingers.

Ok that’s it see you in a half hour byeee

[compellsme]

90s cult classic T4T terrorists spectrum

Trinity x neo = recognition through the other (affectionate)

Narrator x Marla = recognition through the other (derogatory)

Or like, fuck nasty as an act of symbolic worship and self-acceptance vs fuck nasty as an act of existential & personal hatred and self-destruction

Don’t interact with this I’m just putting my ideas down somewhere lol

[redrobin-detective]

It's so funny seeing people react to the quiz with how did I get [character] instead of [other character] when I'm just sitting here like self recognition through the other (derogatory) like I got Dick which I agree with but I always found him too similar to myself to get into him because of this why are you me I'm me situation

Both Jay and I like to dramatically quote works of classic literature at random so like recognizes like. Also rip on your eldest daughter syndrome.

[uwmadarchives]

Exploring Jewish On-Campus Political Action & Cultivating a Personal, Intersectional Historical Practice

I’m at the stage in my work at the archives when I’m about to start writing up my research proposal. I’ve spent the last couple weeks sifting through materials related to SDS, the Black Student Strike, the TA strike, and other student movements. The 1967 “A Student Handbook” produced by SDS has been a really wonderful and applicable guide to the type of political energy on campus at that time (cover shown above).

However, as I’ve been looking through the materials, I’ve also been asking whose voices are present and whose aren’t. The materials in the UW archives are largely white and male, and while many of the SDS materials pay lip service to antiracist ideas, the collections and activism itself is not particularly intersectional.

My main subject(s) of inquiry for my research at the archives follow these questions:

Who was organizing on campus from 1954 to 1976? 

What identities, geographical backgrounds, and ideologies were present in political action at UW during this era?

Whose voices were present but their materials largely absent within archival collections?

What groups had large student membership and what were the relationships between these political groups like? What tensions and affinities existed between these active students?

What happened to the political energy on campus after the Vietnam war ended? 

What issues were students dealing during this era which continue on today? What is “campus continuity” with such a transient population? I.e., what is the relevance of this for students today and what can we learn from the struggles of our predecessors?

An overarching theme of my research is about relationships between student groups with special interest with regards to racial dynamics in organizing. For example, how did SDS interact with local chapters of the Black Panthers? Was “Concerned Black People” an SDS-run group or just affiliated? How did certain groups support or hinder the establishment of the African-American studies department? 

I wrote previously about the contradictions and tensions inherent to investigating black history as a white student historian. Not only might I miss crucial meanings, my whiteness in this work may actually perpetuate the same harms that I want to help repair, and good intentions do not alone mitigate damaging impact. Additionally, I worry about my interest in black student organizing being voyeuristic -- that I may be interested in them for motives that are more centered around my whiteness, projecting the white gaze onto the research. Yet, just because it is harder (socially, emotionally, politically) for me to be researching black student history on this campus doesn’t mean I shouldn’t engage in this kind of study. So, how can I research these topics from a genuine, honest, and reparative place while acknowledging how my own identities factor into the work?

A few days ago I realized that I hadn’t read a lot of significant discourse about Jewish students’ organizing on campus. As a Jewish student, I’m interested in this history -- on a personal level I know how much representation matters. I’ve been paging through “University of Wisconsin: A History” by E. David Cronon and John Jenkins and found mentions of Daily Cardinal Editor-in-Cheif ‘70-’71 Rena Steinzor, and New Year’s Gang members Leo Burt and David Fine. I went to the Wisconsin Historical Society and looked through the Alan Stein papers. The more I read into historical campus activist figures, the more I thought to myself, “There are a lot of pretty Jewish-sounding names.” 

I’m clearly profiling my own people here, but there’s something to that sense of recognition. I’m not entirely sure that Sterling Hall Bombers are really the kind of representation I’m looking for, but I’m still curious: how many Jews were organizing at this time and what (if anything) did their identity as Jews mean to them?

Since I’ve only been thinking about this for a little while, I haven’t looked that deeply into the collections regarding Jewish organizing. Though I don’t know how many materials exist in the archives, I have a hunch that there weren’t very many (if any) groups which explicitly called themselves Jewish political organizations. It makes sense -- things would get antisemitic really fast. It follows a classic derogatory trope: Jews have historically been accused of “meddling” in political affairs and having too much power and influence. Practically speaking, most Jews involved in that era of leftist organizing probably wouldn’t want to advertise their identity. And it’s possible that many secular Jews engaged in UW Vietnam War-era activism didn’t really see their Judaism as a primary or motivating factor in their work. Yet, there’s a thru-line and history of political action within the Jewish community -- and a pretty radical streak at that. My Jewish identity is a strong, powerful basis for my politics. As a way of finding myself in the work and centering my work in my lived reality, I’d love to explore how era-Jews were engaged in campus activism. What did that identity mean to them? Were they affiliated with any Jewish organizations? Did their identity as Jews impact their relationships to other student organizers, i.e, black, latinx, and asian organizers? Investigating my own assumptions, are the people I’ve listed above even Jewish?

I believe that it’s important to know yourself and your own community as preparation for interacting with the greater community. Then, when you’re finally sitting at the table with others, also strong with their own self-knowledge and introspection, the conversation becomes more mutually meaningful. 

Returning to my questions about how my whiteness may impact my work, maybe more seriously researching white identity and Jewish identity and white Jewish identity (p.s., not all Jews are white) on campus at this time, alongside my other inquiries might be a more mutually respectful way to approach any research about black, latinx, and asian student organizing on campus. Ultimately, I think the experience of learning about “myself” through my own identities as a way of learning about the work of others will be fruitful. This practice can help me see my own “skin in the game,” or my direct connection to the stakes of what I’m researching and better prepare to engage in restorative justice through my research here at the archives. 

– Rena Yehuda Newman (They/Them), Student Historian

#UWStudentHistory