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oliviaischillin1204 · 3 months ago

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tickletober day 12- "mischief"

word count: 1,094 words

another fandom i've never written for before!! i LOVE mlp (fim specifically, i haven't watched any other version) and i have a few more ideas for fics bc i absolutely adore the characters and relationships in this show. hope u enjoy!!

Rainbow Dash was trying to be a good friend, she really was! And out of all her friends, Fluttershy was definitely her best one. So she wanted to be extra super duper good to her. But come on, they were at flying camp! There was so much to explore, and Rainbow Dash really wanted to get a headstart on the new flight manuevre they were practicing tomorrow. But all Fluttershy wanted to do was... was nothing!

"Come on, Fluttershy," she groaned. She paced back and forth impatiently on the cloud in front of her friend, where the two were hanging out after class. "Can we please go fly for just five minutes?"

"The teachers said it was going to get windy, Rainbow Dash," Fluttershy said, biting her lip. "And they told us not to practice when it was too windy."

"We're pegasi," Rainbow said in exasperation. "We're supposed to learn how to fly when its windy!"

"But we just started learning! And I don't want us to get lost, or get hurt, or get in trouble..." She trailed off, but to Rainbow's surprise she held her ground. "I'm not going out, and I don't think you should either."

A beat. Then Rainbow Dash sighed dramatically before flopping down next to Fluttershy, rubbing her face on the soft cloud.

"Fine," she said. "Guess we'll just stay here and do nothing."

"Aw, come on, Dashy," Fluttershy said sympathetically. "There's other stuff to do besides flying! We can tell stories, or play the quiet game--"

"The quiet game isn't even a game!" Rainbow Dash whined.

"It can be!" Fluttershy insisted. Rainbow shut her eyes and sighed again; if she'd been looking up she might've noticed the little glimmer in Fluttershy's eyes. "Here, let's play."

Rainbow Dash felt herself pout. She could be quiet. She could be the quietest ever. Not that that was much fun at all, but--

Suddenly there was a purposeful nudge against her side, wiggling into her flank and sending Rainbow shooting upwards with a scream.

"Hey!" She flew on instinct, circling around the in the air like she was trying to chase the tingles away, before moving to hover suspiciously above Fluttershy. "What the heck was that?"

Fluttershy didn't answer her question; instead she looked up with a smile just this side of cheeky. "You lost."

A beat, and Rainbow's jaw dropped. "What? That was totally cheating!"

"Well, you said the quiet game wasn't enough of a game for you," she replied, "so I decided to make it harder! But if you think it's too hard..."

It was bait, and Rainbow Dash knew it, but it didn't stop her from puffing her chest out. "No way! I just wasn't ready-- I can stay quiet, no problem!"

"Oh, good!" Fluttershy replied. "Come back down here and we'll do it again."

Her voice was all innocent, but it still made Rainbow Dash nervous. But she said she could do it, and now she had no choice-- she eased back down to the cloud next to Fluttershy.

"Ready?" Fluttershy asked, and Rainbow Dash barely even had time to answer before she leaned down to nuzzle her nose against Rainbow's side. She jerked to the side on instinct, but she didn't break. She could do this!

But Fluttershy was determined-- she nuzzled harder, wiggling her nose from side to side and letting her long pink hair brush against Rainbow's underbelly. Rainbow tried to shift away, but she was suddenly met with a fluttery feeling on her other side. Fluttershy's wing! It was stretched over her as far as it could reach, and her delicate feathers were tracing all over the side Rainbow thought would be safe from tickles.

Rainbow remembered that Fluttershy had a brother, which must be why the shy was suddenly so good at being mischievous. She could feel her face twisted, biting hard on the inside of her cheek, but the trembling twitchy feeling in her tummy wouldn't go away.

"Oh, you're very good at this, Dashy!" Fluttershy said. She pulled away, and Rainbow took the chance to take a few deep breaths. She almost said something taunting in return, before remembering that she had to be quiet, duh!

Suddenly her knees buckled, and she had to choke back the gasp that almost escaped her mouth. Fluttershy had moved behind her when Rainbow was distracted, and without any warning she'd reared back on her hind legs to wrap her forelegs around Rainbow's body, her hooves pressing and wiggling blindly over Rainbow's tummy. Rainbow barely kept back a whine as she shifted from hoof to hoof. Oh man, that tickled!

"You've got this, Rainbow Dash!" Fluttershy cheered, like she wasn't the one tickling Rainbow at this very second. Again her hair draped down, sending itchy tingles across Rainbow's skin, and she stamped her feet trying to ignored the tickly feeling. Even Fluttershy's breath on her back sent sparky tickles up her neck.

"Mmmmmmmm-hmmmm!"

It took everything in her power to keep from laughing right now. Rainbow suddenly realized with a start that they never said how long she had to be quiet for-- was Fluttershy just gonna keep going until she laughed? Was it even possible for her to win?

But before she could even try to start a fight about that, Fluttershy's wings curled around her once again, fluttering and tracing and dancing all over Rainbow's sides, her tummy, her neck--

"Ahhhhhahahahahaha!"

That was all Rainbow Dash could do before she collapsed to the ground, rolling to the side and launching Fluttershy back onto the cloud next to her. She landed with a small 'oomph' that Rainbow Dash couldn't even hear over her own giggles.

"You suck," she said in between breaths, rolling around on the ground to try to dispel the tingly feelings that were still running across her skin.

Fluttershy didn't seem offended. "You lasted a long time! That must've been difficult for you."

Rainbow flushed. "You made it difficult for me!"

"Yes, I did," Fluttershy replied, a tone of smugness Rainbow Dash had never heard in her voice before. "But at least you weren't bored!"

Rainbow paused. That was true. She hadn't been bored playing the game; in fact, it had been kinda fun. She'd do it again.

Suddenly she froze before narrowing her eyes at Fluttershy with an evil smile.

"Your turn."

"My turn?" Fluttershy blinked once before her eyes widened. "Wait-- Dashy-- hehehehehey!"

Man, Rainbow Dash didn't realize how bad Fluttershy would be at the quiet game. But that's okay! They had plenty of time to play it together.

#my posts #my writing #tickling #tickle fic #tickletober 2024 #augtickletober2024 #tt24 #mlp tickling #lee!rainbow dash #ler!fluttershy

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koralira-kira · 1 year ago

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when it rains 🎐han jisung🎐

pairings : han jisung x reader

genre : fluff, romance, slice of life, did i say fluff?

synopsis : situations wherein you came to love han's habit when it rains

warnings : profanities used

wc : 980

notes : i finally finished this little bitch after two days. i've been really busy lately cuz me and my parents are going back and forth from the city to my grandparents house (the province) bc of my granddad's death anniversary. and to add that, we're packing my things to go back to my dorm since school is about to start. so yeah, the travelling is killing the shit out of me. other than that, a big thanks to all 249 of you for liking my bang chan fic!!! ya'll don't how ecstatic i felt for that. anyways, moving on, here's the fic. hope you enjoy!

---

man, it's really raining like cats and dogs outside. it has been raining hard for the last couple of days lately, and honestly you quite liked it. that is, minus all the thunder and lightning. but in your situation, not only do you like the rain for what it is but also for how your boyfriend is reacting to it. let me explain. han loved the rain as much as you do. especially when it gets all cold in the apartment complex. NOW let's just say that whilst the cold temperature is going on, he likes to expose the bare top half of his body. the first time you saw this, you're all confused as to why he took his hoodie off when he could've just got a wife beater or tank top. but oh no no no.

"woah, hold on there. what do you think you're doing?" you asked as soon as han was about to take his hoodie off.

"why what's wrong?" he asked, confused as to why you stopped him from stripping. poor boy just likes the cold, ok?

"it's so cold, baby, why are you taking your hoodie off?"

"i like the cold, sweetheart. why? is there a problem?" now he's being cocky. his ego definitely boosted up after he took off that hoodie.

"oh no no, it's fine. just... carry on i guess," he smirked. goddamn that fucking smirk is killing the shit out of you.

now he joins you sitting at the opposite end of the couch and taking out his phone from his pocket. you took your gaze out from your phone for a minute to look at jisung. when i tell you this man is sculpted, he IS sculpted. you'd be lying if you said he didn't look good without the hoodie. the body- i mean, HIS body never disappoints. you could look at him for hours and heck, if you had hyunjin's hands, you wouldn't waste a second to draw him like that. you were practically drooling over him at this point, you didn't care how long you've been staring at him you just wanted too take your time looking at him. yeah, just definitely taking your time.

"hey, what are you thinking so hard about?"

"hm? oh, nothing really. just, you know, thinking," you met with his eyes for a second but soon making it back to your phone.

"... you were fantasizing about me weren't you?"

"what?! pfft- no, obviously not!" you declined, laughing it off as if it was nothing but it's undoubtedly the exact opposite.

"why don't you come over here and sit next to me, i'm a bit lonely here," his arms were now on top of the backrest of the couch, manspreading and basically looking cocky.

"oh so now i'm the one that has to adjust for you, huh?"

"so you don't want to get closer to this?" he argued back, pointing at his body.

‘this motherfucker,’ you thought.

"well, yes i'd love to but-"

"then come over here!"

"ah ah, let me finish-"

honestly, the bickering could go on.

___

the second time you experienced this little habit of his however, was much more intimate than you'd expect it to be. sure you two have had sex here and there but this one was more, say, romantic in a way.

now it was the next day and you're alone in the apartment watching a movie whilst hunching back on the couch eating a pack of doritos, han had to leave a while ago to go to the grocery store and buy a few things for the both of you. it took almost an hour for him to get back because of the bags but when he did, he was soaking wet from the rain.

"i'm back!" he said, kicking off his shoes and putting them on the shoe rack leaving him his white drenched socks.

"heyy- HEY! why are you soaking wet? didn't you bring an umbrella or something?" you rushed over to the man, helping him putting the grocery bags on the counter.

"i was about to but i saw that it was sunny outside so I didn't feel the need to. anyways, i'll go take a quick shower, love you," he said, pecking you before going to the bathroom.

"yeah yeah, don't worry i'll take it from here. love you too."

it took you not less than 10 minutes to finish putting up the groceries then headed back to the couch to finish your show, that is until SOMEBODY interrupted it.

"hey, babyyy~" once again, a topless han jisung comes out of the bathroom, crawling into your arms and cuddling you.

"you're not wearing a shirt again. you know you might catch a cold after this," you looked down at him trying to make him look into your eyes. but as stubborn as he is, he didn't listen and rested his head on the crook of your neck.

"hmm," he groggily said. you knew that he didn't wanna talk, but yet you still tried to let him know that he might get sick later on.

"han-"

"can we stay like this for a while? i kinda miss you," he cut you off. his hands making their way from your waist to your back to hold you even tighter and yours going to his hair and the other to his back caressing it. you both silently agree on not talking, it was quite comforting for the both of you. the mixture of sounds coming from the tv and rain were a perfect match, especially with his breath on your neck and the asynchronous breathing coming from the both of you as you melt into each other's arms.

you knew intimate moments like this with han would come sooner or later but you didn't expect for it to come this soon. you're not complaining though.

fin

---

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bonesandthebees · 4 months ago

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I'll tell one story from the trip tho!!

So Germany yes. That was added to my trip because I wanted to meetup with a friend there AND there was a really cool painting I liked that was in the Hamburg Kunsthalle, and Hamburg is right below Denmark so it was practically on the way!!

The painting in question? A wanderer above a sea of fog.

This painting is the whole reason I started getting into art/art history. In my philosophy class I took last year, we had a brief section on the Romantic period of history and I found it super fascinating and one of the examples from that period we learnt about was this painting.

This painting represents one of the core beliefs of the Romanticism period: finding yourself back in touch with nature.

The Enlightenment was all about science and cold hard facts and technology and blahblahblah and the Romantic period was the response to that, it pushed back against it. It was about love and reconnecting with nature and embracing chaos and i just ARGHRHT i know it Definitely (and I mean really, it definitely) had its flaws, but idk:)) it just really spoke to me and the painting itself is absolutely gorgeous. It was the first time I ever saw a historically famous painting and had it actually Speak to me.

I just found it very interesting, because all my life I grew up super science brain and stuff, so it was nice to just... View life from a different angle, if that makes sense.

But yeah!! Went off on a bit of a tangent there, but the point is the painting made me get into art!! And so it's special to me and I wouldn't have even gone to any of the (many) art museums I went to in Europe without it, so I figured why the heck not! Plus the Hamburg Kunsthalle is absolutely gorgeous like Holy Shit I saw the photos of the building and went "dang I dont even have to have the painting there to wanna go here, it's so cool"

And thank god for that. Because Bee. Bee.

I go to Hamburg for a fricken day trip--not even a day trip, just a few hours, because I want to maximize my time with my friend and she ends up not being able to go with me, but at this point I've put in too much research to skip this place.

So I'm hopping on a two hour train just for this one museum and I get there and wow it's even better than the photos. Like this place-- jaw dropping. It's SO FUCKING COOL but,

But.

The painting isn't there. The painting. Is not there. It's actually funny how I find out, I end up chatting with another tourist and he came to this museum for the exact same painting and I mentioned it to him and he was like "yeah no bro they moved it just a few weeks ago" LIKE WHAT 😭😭😭 so depressing I was just like ??!??!? Bc if u google it, it still tells u it's in hamburg like i had no way of knowing it was so frustrating 😭😭

But yeah so apparently it's in Dresden bc it's like some anniversary or smth and im just like wtf is dresden. Where is dresden. Why is this my life

(Dresden is in germany, 6 hrs from Hamburg so originally I thought I wouldn't be able to make it, but it's in fact inbetween Berlin and Poland, which I was staying in Berlin and going to Poland right after so it ended up working out perfectly!!)

And so. I added another city that I'd never heard of to my Germany trip just to find this painting that I was now getting excessively more passionate about than I'd ever been bc why is it this hard to find one goddamned painting??

And I arrive in Dresden btw and like immediately go to the wrong museum which is Hilarious and i just go to the front desk and go WHERE IS THIS PAINTING and theyre like ... Are u good-- Jk i wasnt that dramatic but i was feeling it 😭

But ANYWAYS the guy is like "ohhh yeah we have that painting just 5 mins away but erm. The museum is full rn"

And im just like ... Wdym full. Like. Today... Days... Weeks...???

And the person is like "full until 16"

And im here like "september 16??? Or 16:00 the hour??"

They meant 1600 the hour and i was like oh well idc about that bro that's only a two hour wait 😭😭 this gives me time to drop my stuff off at the hostel anyway sooo

AND SO

I drop off my stuff at the hostel

I go to the museum

And it's literally the first painting u see when u walk into the exhibit like dang i was expecting more obstacles at this point HAHAHAHAHA

But yeah!!!!!

I SAW IT!!!! I FINALLY FOUND IT!!!!!!

It's really cool:)) much bigger than I was expecting irl and his coat is a lot more green than it is in replicas!!

Im very happy I went searching for it and lowkey? Lowkey I wanna try this again hahahaha

It was a fun adventure and I fell in love with both Hamburg and Dresden. Like Dresden is honestly one of my fav parts of the whole trip (I'll go more detail into that later), and I would have never have gone to it without this painting so!!

I wanna choose more random paintings and go to unknown cities just for it hahaha

OOOO I love examining the shift from the enlightenment to the romantic period. of course the romantic period had its issues but it was so interesting to see art and literature shift focus from such stringent intellectualism to embracing emotions and nature and all that. also I've heard of that painting! it's such a stunning painting I totally get why you feel so connected with it

oh my god your story of hunting down this painting is wild 😭 I can't believe they moved it and just didn't say anything online??? but hey yknow I bet it was still incredible to visit hamburg. and then you got to dresden to see the painting anyway!!! that's such a cool detour to take. you got to see not one but two german cities you didn't plan on visiting before and you got to see the painting in the end!! it's always so much fun seeing a famous painting in person for the first time and realizing what details exist that just don't get across in photos.

I can't wait to hear more about hamburg and dresden. I want to visit germany so badly so I want to take notes about places to check out.

I think I've talked about this before but this whole thing reminds me of my journey to see girl with a pearl earring in Den Haag. I only went there for the museum and was just in the city for a few hours but it was still so worth the trip the museum alone was incredible and seeing the painting was unparalleled. I think picking paintings to see and traveling to find them is a really fun way to find places to travel. I should consider that for my next europe trip hmm

#ask #icyfox17

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adriannanderson · 2 years ago

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Sudden stop

Hi sweet boy

We wonder if uncle Sam was able to join you when his earthly life ended last week

Our hope is that the two of you are together

Sober Sam is one of the coolest people you'll ever meet

He'll make you laugh a lot 🥰

Layten is still with us, and we are working on ensuring he gets to stay with us until he's an adult

I told someone yesterday that I always wanted 2 kids by 30 and have been blessed with 5 kids by 42

You just never know what your life may bring

The loss of another brother, and the loss of a father, has been nothing less than miserable for our family

We are pretty well versed on grief, as we've handled our share of people we love gone too soon

But it turns out, this loss is setting us back significantly

Since Uncle Sam's passing, your dad has been wound up and hurting in a way I have not seen since he lost you

There are a lot of dynamics causing that, but the root is certainly grief

The same day that I was admitted to the hospital, he began having extreme pain in his abdomen that they suspect are a reaction to a faulty gall bladder

So my right hand man, the guy that always steps in when I'm unable to be somewhere, is out of commission too

I ended up being admitted after I have been experiencing extreme fatigue since Sam passed

I just know grief is heavy and I knew this valley is deep, but I'll come out on the other side

This would be no different

But overall felt like I was handling things ok!

Day to day life was at an all time high, as far as responsibilities this week - 4 track meets, 3 that I haven't been able to attend bc of my health, as well as preschool conferences that I had to reschedule, and most important of all, Coops junior prom

Meetings, decorating, after prom responsibilities

Pictures to be taken and places to be that require a shower and looking decent

Except I can't stand long enough without getting weak

I just can't even think on it for 2 seconds without getting tears

I really wanted that day to just be about your big brother

He assures me that he will not be bummed if I can't be there, that it will be ok

But he doesn't know a mama's heart

It will not be ok for a few

But there is still a chance I could rally before then

Today is really really hard and does not make me feel like tomorrow is going to be an option

I overdosed myself on calcium (note to others, you CAN eat too many tums!) Then had a very serious panic attack - either brought on by the calcium or the long list of things scrolling through my head on repeat

Either way, my heart rate and BP were very high for hours, one med that they had me try to lower calcium per Mercy dropped my BP so fast I could no longer move my limbs or talk like normal - that one goes in my chart as NO THANKS NEVER AGAIN

There were talks of sending me north and I did NOT want that. I was receiving so much care and support from our wayne county hospital staff that I knew could not be topped in a large facility

I was able to get some sleep about 430 am - 9am Thursday morning

When I woke, my nurse told me that my calcium level was down to 11 from over 14 and that I was able to go home

Music to my ears

But how did they check my level??

Oh ya know, just took blood while I was passed the heck out!

Lolol that was a first for me!

Thursday was sleep, all day and all night

Today I'm awaiting news on newest levels, and continuing to rest, as my head and body are too cloudy to do much else

I've been crying on and off since Wednesday, and decided I had to write to you

To try and empty my mind and relieve myself of the loop in my mind

House - a mess

Laundry - will never be done

Dogs - need baths

Work - Preschool conferences and DK/K recommendations - now I have to reschedule everyone during the 1st week of ball practice😭😭😭

Em - where's she going after school? Moms, Shelbys, cierras…..

Coop has study table - does he need help getting that grade up or is he just being lazy and not turning stuff in

Carsyn - are we helping her make the right decisions concerning how she spends her time? She's really worried about her mom.I think and I hate that I'm the cause

Layten- can't really speak on him too much without another serious cry sesh bc I think his pain level is immense and I want to be able to not mess this mom thing up for him. He deserves a few years of just being a high school kid with no adult worries. And no matter what, we'll never be able to replace his dad, who he loves with all his heart

After prom - I should either be at Carsyns track meet or helping decorating tonight and helping do whatever tomorrow night for after prom. The mom guilt for this one is very deep bc it's a big undertaking and needs all hands on deck

Side job - 3 people backed up on selling - not that they mind waiting but I'd like to get those off my list of things to do

Both desks - at school and home are overloaded and I want to clean them but every time I look at them im.so overwhelmed I just can't even start

2 IEP mtgs that need scheduled between now and end of school - sounds easy but is actually a zoo getting all hands on deck

There's more but these are are ones that are at the top of the loop in my head

Losing you taught me sometimes just releasing it, the stuff, the worry, in some way can bring relief

So there is it, or the bulk of it at least

Some of our life's stressors are not my story to tell

I know for sure that since losing you Fish, any death of anyone we know is a small set back

And death of those we love most can be large set backs

But we never give up

We'll come out ok

It will hurt a lot, but we will come out ok

I love you little man

You are one of my reasons to smile everyday

Love Mom

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beelzegrub · 4 years ago

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can I request what would happen if we summon them while we're on human realm bc we missed them so much but lose so much blood in the process I don't really know I'm a sucker for these kind of things. thank youu!!

EDIT FROM FUTURE OP: This ask has been sitting in my drafts for months half finished and I finally found the motivation to finish. Anon, I’m so sorry for the wait. You’re a sweetheart ❤️ I was only able to do the three eldest though and I’m so sorry!!

Um hello??? I love this so much thank you!!! I thought it was kind of silly to go through all of that at the end of season 2 to just.... not use it so I’m excited about this!!!! (Sorry if this is too angsty my brain got super pumped about this and took off.

PS the request said “we” so I used a reader insert type of style. Hope that’s what you were looking for :)

MC Summons Their Demon, but at What cost?

Trigger warning!!!! Self harm/blood

How long had it been since you’d seen the him? Weeks? Months? Who knows. They all blended together after while. All you knew is that it had been too long. Why was this all so tedious? Solomon had promised to teach you the summoning ritual as soon as you could handle it. Why hadn’t he done so? Did he not trust you? Was he purposely keeping you away from the them? Surely you were strong enough at this point. Enough with the waiting. You wouldn’t sit around and any longer! You needed to see them. You needed to see him.

You flipped messily through book after book. Solomon had given you many to study for your apprenticeship. There had to be something about summoning in one of these!

“Hmm..”

You carefully read through the worn pages of one of the larger and dustier tomes. Something about this one called to you. You zoned out as you took in the information on the pages, following context clues until you found what you were looking for. The images drawn on the page seemed foreign and surprised you. A summoning circle? You had expected as much, but the repeated mentions of ‘sacrifice’ and ‘blood oath’ seemed ancient and outdated. You couldn’t help but notice there was no mention of sentimental possessions of the demon you were trying to summon as well. You were sure none of the brothers would suggest a summoning if it were dangerous though...

Out of options and out of patience, you gathered your courage and set up the ritual to the best of your ability. Things seemed to match the books instructions, at least. All that was left was the blood. You stepped into the middle of the circle and closed brought a sewing needle to the top of your finger. The book hadn’t specified the amount of blood needed, but it was better to start small, you reasoned. You closed your eyes and pricked it, quickly squeezing a single drop of blood into the center of the circle, and said the name of the person you had been desperate to see.

Lucifer

The day of the summoning, Lucifer had felt this nagging sense of danger from the moment he opened his eyes. He was so sure it was one of his brothers about to cause trouble for him once again.

Lucifer spent the day preparing for the worst. Had Mammon stolen something of vast importance? Did Levi buy another piece of cursed media? Surely Beel hadn’t eaten a poisonous dish??

That evening, tired from being on edge all day, he had retired to his study, hoping some music would help calm his nerves. He settled into his chair and closed his eyes.

Then came the pull.

It had been ages since he had felt a sensation like this. When was the last time someone had tried to summon him? Hundreds of years ago, it had to be. And it never felt as strong as this force pulling him now.

There had once been a cult of devil worshipers who sacrificed many of their members for a chance to pull him to the human world, quite surprised to find out their sacrifices had been in vain, considering Lucifer wasn’t interested in a bunch of worthless humans. But even then the tug hadn’t been this strong. Sure, he could still resist it, but the strength of it still left him awestruck. Who had the power to call to him like this?

“Lucifer!”

His blood ran cold. Immediately, he stopped resisting the call and gave in, allowing the summoning to take place.

You had done it. Lucifer was here! The strongest and most fearsome of the seven, and you had Summoned him to you. Your heart swelled when you though of how impressed he’d be when he found out you had done it all on your own. Would he praise you? Would he tease you? Would he tilt his head and smirk, then ask you if you had really missed him that much?

You smiled softly, looking up at him. The look on his face wasn’t one of pride. His eyebrows had furrowed and a frown creased deep into his face. Was he angry at you? No... you had seen his anger many times. This wasn’t it.

“MC....what have you done?”

He cradled you softly in his arms. Wait. When had he picked you up? You looked at your surroundings, the fear in the pit of your stomach ever growing. Where had all this blood come from? You had only pricked your finger! Lucifer’s hand touched your cheek, pulling your face back to him.

“Don’t look.”

You had no choice but to obey. You simply didn’t have the strength to move anymore.

“I’ve called for help, it’ll be just a moment, MC. Just keep your eyes on me.”

Lucifer’s voice was soft and soothing, and you felt your tired body relax into his hold.

“I did it... I brought you here... I did it...” you closed your eyes, a smile on your lips.

“MC, keep your eyes open. Look at me. MC! MC!”

Mammon

That day had started out much the same as always. Mammon, still sore from last nights punishment, groaned as he slumped into his desk at RAD. He rested his head in his arms against the desk, and glanced at the seat that used to belong to you. Obviously, you weren’t there, but it didn’t hurt to check....

“MC is still in the human world, Mammon.”

Mammon jumped and sat up straight in his seat, his cheeks red from being caught.

“I know that Belphie! I was just-just uh zonin’ out! MC’s old seat just happened to be in the same direction!” He stuttered out an excuse.

“Just call them, Mammon. I’m sure MC would be happy to hear your voice.” Oh great, now Beel’s getting involved too. He knew his brothers meant no harm, but all this talk about MC was getting him riled up!

“Fine! I will! I’ll call MC tonight! and you two AREN’T invited!” Mammon laid his head down once again, this time hiding his face, not wanting his blush to show a second time. Tonight he’d finally hear MC’s voice again. And he could blame Beel and Belphie for the call!

Come dinner time, Mammon had just about run out of patience. His head kept telling him to wait just a bit longer, but something in his heart was yelling for him to quit dragging his feet.

“I’m going to my room and NOBODY better interrupt me, ya hear?!” Mammon stumbled to his feet and started marching to his room, six pairs of eyes staring at him questioningly. He only made it a few steps when he felt it. A tug. He closed his eyes and swayed on his feet, dizzy from the force of it. This was a summoning, wasn’t it? He had felt it plenty of times from those damn witches, but something about this was different. He turned around to look his brothers again, a look of confusion on his face.

“I...think I’m bein’ summoned.”

Levi snorted and crossed his arms. “I’m sure you’re guilty of something. Better just get it over with.”

The rest of the brothers mumbled in agreement.

Except Lucifer.

Lucifer quickly pushed out his chair and hurried to Mammon. Something was wrong. A simple summoning wouldn’t have this effect on a demon of Mammon’s stature.

The pull came once again, stronger this time. Mammon winced and held his hand to his aching head. Lucifer’s hand came down to rest on his shoulder

“I don’t know how long I can resist this. Somethin’ isn’t right. Lucifer, what’s happening to me?” He looked to his brother for help, and found the rest of them had gathered around as well, a look of concern on all of their faces.

“Someone call for Diavolo and Barbatos. Mammon, hold on just a few more moments.” Lucifer commanded.

Mammon would have agreed, if not for the voice that rang out clearly in his head, calling his name.

“Mammon!”

Mammon’s eyes snapped open and stopped resisting the pull, hearing the shouts from his brothers disappear as he followed the call.

“Mammon! Mammon! Mammon Mammon Mammon! Please!” You couldn’t keep this up for much longer, you knew it. You had fallen to your knees moments after the initial call. You could feel every drop of blood flowing out of the pin prick on your finger, but you didn’t dare give up. You had come this far, and you wouldn’t give up now. Not until you had to.

But you didn’t have to. A flash of light blinded you momentarily, and when you could see again, there he was. Standing there was the Mammon. Relief flushed through your entire body, and you stopped pouring your magic into the spell. Utterly exhausted, your body came crashing forward, landing in front of his feet.

Mammon quickly slid to his knees on the ground, picking you up off the floor and resting your head in his lap.

“You....Are you okay, MC?” Mammon tried to keep his voice even and steady, not wanting to scare you, but his hands that held too tightly and his body that quivered gave him away.

“I am now.” You answered quietly, unsure if it was true. At least Mammon was here and holding you in his arms. Things would be okay as long as he was with you.

“You...You idiot! Stupid! What the heck were ya thinkin’!? Can’t you see how much blood you’ve lost? This isn’t how you’re supposed to be summoning us! I’m gonna kill that damn sorcerer!” Mammon felt his blood boil with each second that passed. How Could Solomon have allowed this?

You softly squeezed his hand, not having the energy to yell for his attention. Immediately, he stopped, looking at you questioningly.

“Solomon didn’t teach me this. He wouldn’t. But.... I just couldn’t wait any longer. I needed to see you.” You answered.

He frowned deeply, more troubled with this answer. You had done all this just to see him? He felt a lump in his throat form. “I would have come to you. You didn’t have to do this.” He pressed his forehead to yours, closing his eyes to stop any tears from escaping.

You cupped his cheek, returning the affection he so rarely showed. “S’okay. All that matters is you’re here now. I just...need....to rest....a little...” Your eyes fluttered closed, feeling at peace and calm in your love’s arms.

Panic. Once again, Mammon’s eyes snapped open. He placed his hand over yours, trying to gently coax you into opening your eyes once more.

“Not yet, you can’t yet, MC. We have to wait for help to come. Come on, wake up.” He knew his brothers would come. Someone would come. They wouldn’t let this happen to you. He wouldn’t let this happen to you. “MC!” When gentle touches didn’t work, he got rougher, shaking you and yelling, desperate to see your eyes open.

“Enough playin’ around MC! Wake up! WAKE UP, DAMMIT! Wake... Wake up...You have to..... Wake up....”

Leviathan

To say that Levi was missing his MC was like saying humans like air. Is it true? Yeah, but kind of an understatement. Humans needed air to live and breathe, and in his eyes, you were air. It’s no secret that Levi wasn’t exactly popular. One might even say it was well known that he was a dorky loner demon, if they were feeling particularly sassy. Being a loner has it’s advantages, like having more time for gaming and anime binging, but it sure is, well, a lonely once you’ve had someone to share your passions with. And once that someone is gone, their absence weighs heavy.

So yes, Levi was missing MC. So what? Everyone was missing MC. Why wouldn’t they? His MC was a ray of sunshine in a world of darkness. Ugh. That line sounder way cooler when the hero in his latest otome had said it. Of course his thoughts couldn’t sound that cool. But that’s not the point! Levi figured he had no right to complain about MC being gone, because he was just a gross, annoying, worthless otaku. He didn’t deserve to miss them. He was lucky he got to spend as much time with them as he did, really.

But nobody could blame him for thinking these thoughts, right? Thinking about how much he missed the way MC would cram themselves as close to him as possible to get a look at whatever mobile game he was playing was harmless. So was remembering all the nights they’d spent binging anime and then realizing the sun was up, smiling sheepishly at each other and promising not to stay up so late next time, even though they always did. Okay, so maybe thinking about the way they looked when they were fresh out of his shower, smelling of his soap and shampoo was less than innocent, but what was he supposed to do!? Leaning your damp head on his shoulder and curling up close to him like that! Doing things like that is bad for an otaku’s heart! You might give them hope or something...

Enough was enough! He didn’t have time to be obsessing over how much he missed MC. It was taking time away from his one and only true love. “Ruri-Chan, you’d never abandon me right? No, I know you wouldn’t. You’re not like that.” Levi began speaking to his latest figure. “Not to say MC IS like that! No, of course their not! They didn’t have a choice!” He stuttered out a quick fix to his hurtful words. He was glad they weren’t around to hear, but it still felt wrong to say. He was quiet for a minute, staring at his floor in shame. Slowly, he lifted his eyes back to the figure. “Do you think they miss me like I miss them?”

And then he felt it. It had been so long, but he knew this feeling.This was a summoning, wasn’t it?! Based on the intense tug he felt, it had to be a super powerful sorcerer or maybe a group of basic magic users? Honestly, he was flattered. Someone wanted to summon HIM? No, They must have made a mistake. Surely this summon was meant for one of his brothers.

Leviathan was so lost in his own self pity he missed the first two calls of his name. The third one, sounding so desperate and pleading, snapped him out of his funk in an instant. He knew that voice. Without hesitation he let the summon take him, and there he was. He was finally reunited with MC.

But it wasn’t supposed to be like this. When he finally saw them again, he was supposed to feel elated and whole again, not like a piece of his heart was ripped right out of his chest. But when he locked eyes with them, surrounded by blood and their eyes looking glassy, that’s exactly what he felt.

“MC! Oh no. Oh no.”

Levi. He was here. He had to be. You heard his voice and felt his presence, felt his arms circle around you and cradle you tightly against his chest. But why couldn’t you see him? And why did you feel so… empty?

“Levi? That’s you isn’t it? Why is it so dark?” Had the candles all gone out? No, even before you lit them, you remember it hadn’t been this dark. Something was wrong.

Levi inhaled shakily, holding back the sobs he desperately wanted to release. “MC, what are you talking about? I’m right here! Can’t you see me?”

Like a bolt of lighting, the realization hit you. It wasn’t dark. The candles hadn’t gone out. It was your eyes.

“No, Levi. I can’t. I can’t see you. I can’t see anything.” You shakily reach your hand up, frantically feeling around for your love’s face. Leviathan’s usual timid nature word have normally had him reeling away, but in this moment, he had no reservations as he helped guide your hand to his cheek. His lips trembled as he fought the urge to scream.

“MC…. Why would you do this? You’ve lost so much blood… and.. and your sight? I’m not worth this. I’m just a useless otaku! It isn’t fair!” His tears began to flow, the guilt of it all was ripping him apart.

You closed your eyes and smiled as you remembered the many faces of this man you had called to you. “It was worth it. I did it because I love you, Levi. I need you. After all, what good is a Henry without his lord?”

#obey me #shall we date? obey me #obey me lucifer #obey me mc #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #reader insert #tw self harm #tw sewing needle prick #tw blood #this was way to long winded I overdid it

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rainbowrider1290 · 3 years ago

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My take on a Genshin Impact Circus AU Part 4 with Noelle as a strongwoman and Amber as a death-defying archery stuntwoman. Their backstories are under the cut!

Noelle:

First off I have a very self-indulgent headcanon that she is ridiculously strong. Like. Can benchpress people. Canonverse or AU.

She used to help out around the circus and she was kind of indifferent to the fact that she was likely going to be a maid. It's a respectable profession. And helping out at her childhood friends' (Kaeya and Diluc) manor as she'd been born into doing seemed like a good job.

How she got into the circus life requires a bit of backstory. Back when they were kids, Kaeya, Diluc, and Noelle would mess around (as kids do) and have little challenges for themselves. Who can run the fastest, who can do the best cartwheel, who can jump the highest, and the like.

Noelle got a little hesitant as she got into her early teens bc she was always told to be ladylike, so she spent one or two of their hangout sessions watching Kaeya and Diluc and talking. One day, however, Kaeya and Diluc are being Teenage Boys and lifting heavy things trying to outlift each other. Noelle has lifted furniture when cleaning up after these two so she figures this one unladylike thing would be okay.

She comes up behind them and just. Picks them both up. On top of the things they were lifting already. Kaeya and Diluc have to take a second and just look at her like "yeah no you are never sitting out of our competitions again"

And so they try other things like cartwheels and tests of courage like who can climb the highest on a tree and things are back to normal.

Skip forward a few years and Crepus dies. There's a huge mystery around it that not even his son's attendants are privy to. The only thing people know is that the sons have been sent away to boarding school. The whole manor is abandoned, all the workers fired.

Noelle for the next few years spends her time working at laundromats, and other odd jobs, but eventually she runs out of luck and suddenly there's too many people and not enough opportunities.

One of her friends from one of her old jobs invites her to go out and see this new circus that happens to be in town. She goes because why not. And wouldn't you know it one of the acts is her childhood friends doing these death-defying stunts that hit her with a wave of nostalgia bc their entire act consists of essentially the song "anything you can do" but with more and more dangerous stunts.

Noelle of course has to say hi, so they catch up and Noelle's lack of work comes up and would you look at that Aether and Lumine happen to have an opening for a maid.

So Noelle settles in, continuing to lift heavy shit to clean under it (Bennett swears up and down he saw her lift a fridge once but he might've been sleep-deprived). She also got into helping Chongyun with the techy stuff so sometimes she'll be at tech rehearsals moving things around and one time a rope holding up a person breaks near Noelle and she. catches it.

Now, one night. One of the acts drops out at the last moment bc injury or last-minute commitment or the like. And it leaves a gap in the show. Everyone else is busy. And panicking bc the circus is still relatively new and they really need to build their rep rn.

They start wondering what kind of last-minute acts they can put together like "what about the gymnasts??" "They all have group routines" "do they have old routines??" "Not polished enough for what we need" and someone somewhere pipes up "man I wish we had a strongman or something" and Diluc and Kaeya immediately whip their heads around to look at each other for like half a second before Kaeya bolts. He finds Noelle doing her usual rounds she's been doing for like a month now and Bennett was right, she is currently under a mini-fridge that she is lifting over her head whilst leaning it against a wall.

Kaeya takes Noelle by the shoulders and just zooms her over to where the commotion is happening and pitches the idea to Aether and Lumine. They're hesitant as hECK bc this is a huge risk they're taking since Noelle isn't even a performer but Diluc pitches that they could literally just scatter really heavy items and have Noelle clean under them and as long as she looks at the audience every once in a while it can be played off as a bit.

Noelle with qUITE the stammer says that she'll try her best but at this time is in need of a moment. She has never performed before. Kaeya and Diluc have to go perform so they leave her with a shoulder squeeze and a thumbs up.

She gets on-stage. She flinches under the lights for a second. She takes a deep breath and focuses on the first thing before her with her best "oh heavens, it's filthy in here", and she gets through the entire act by doing that for every object. So the audience is seeing this seemingly petite young girl lift the equivalent of a hecking car in order to clean under it.

Needless to say, there's roaring applause the second Noelle leaves (which she hears from far away because holy shit I just cleaned for people and they liked it)

This was a bit of a one-time thing and she goes back to her regular maid duties until the circus gets a new strongman by the name "Zhongli".

His style is more about lifting exTREMELY LARGE ROCKS, and breaking them in half whilst giving a history/geology lesson on them.

He quietly observes the maid who he hears fantastical stories of That One Time She Charmed An Audience By Cleaning. He was bewildered at first but saw the merit of it while watching her clean. He immediately decides that this girl has sO MUCH. POTENTIAL that is being wasted by having her work as a maid. He has nothing against maids or their profession, but he invites her to train with him.

Noelle gets hELLA stronger and they come to a conclusion. Noelle performs part-time and is a maid part-time. She doesn't have a particular performance style. She'll sometimes play catch with Zhongli and his big rocks, other times she'll be in the background of performers like Amber in the art lifting some hEAVY SHIT.

She gets along with Chongyun super well bc Chongyun has to make less trips to move his equipment since he's worked with her. She's a blessing for when they have to pack up and move.

Amber:

Amber's story is a little more straightforward. She started out engaged to a suitor. Amber was the kid in kindergarten who was learning about dragons and "idk what everyone else was doing". She's known what she wants for a long time, and what she wants at the moment, is not a relationship.

Throughout her childhood she was a very lonely child. Her family exposed her to lots of academic or ladylike things (do not ask me when this au is set, it's the 1800s and the 1990s at the same time or a suspendes steampunk time) to get her away from the thing she liked most: archery. She'd been exposed to it as a kid and latched on.

This drove a bunch of suitors away, so her family got more desperate and exposed her to more classes and activities to get her away from it. She went "that's easy, I'll just practice at night"

So she does that. She practices at night and underperforms in the coming weeks. It is during this time that her parents (high class ppl) find her a man to marry for some business deal idk.

The man's nice enough. It's just obvious he can only take Amber in small doses, and Amber takes full advantage of this to practice and stay in shape.

How Amber gets into the circus life was essentially running away. She bonds with Eula over this.

So because of all the attempts to make her fit into the ideal lady description, her rebellious streak said "yeah we're going to go as far away from that as possible" and she goes "I'm going to run away with the circus" bc that's what the books she's read say is the most rebellious thing you can do.

She finds THE FIRST circus she sees and begs to be let in. This is the shadiest most sketchy place but Amber sees it as the key to her freedom. She signs a contract.

They treat her like the US treats their students. She barely gets time to practice for performances and she's mostly doing dirty work. When they ask her what she can do she's like "I'm really good at archery" and they go "cool, you're going to be doing that while everything is on fire now. Can you do a handstand"

Essentially they push her and push her and push her to do more and more hazardous things she has to pick up on under the threat of being kicked to the curb.

After a while of this Amber is extremely burned out (pun intended) and as she's packing up after one of her shows, covered in burns but proud bc she hit all her targets without killing anyone, she's approached by a blond foreigner.

Tbh for all she's read, Amber really doesn't consider leaving and this time she can't run away since she's now bound by a contract (not Zhongli's btw in case anyone was wondering).

This foreigner tells her that there's so many ways to improve her situation and that he runs a circus looking for members.

Amber refuses since she's not getting tangled up in another legal mess, but she takes his advice on how to take care of her burns, and improve safety while she's performing.

Skip a few months. She hears word of this mysterious new circus around. Her encounter with who she'll later know as Aether stuck with her, and so she goes. To see whether she could really shoot her arrows without being burned alive.

After a show one night, she tries to get past security and fails repeatedly. She turns to leave and wouldn't you know it there's Aether. And Lumine. Waiting for her once she turns the corner. Amber's biggest concern is her existing contract and when Aether and Lumine say they have a nICE lawyer, Amber sees her next step to freedom.

Aether and Lumine essentially gain custody of Amber (but like for adults) and Amber is. Shocked. She's walked through her new contract of employment clearly and essentially treated like a human being.

And now that she knows things and has more freedom (though still under the watchful eyes of Aether and Lumine to see how she does) her creativity and competitive streak flourish. She decides she actually doesn't hate fire, she just doesn't like when she doesn't know when or where it's coming. And she makes fast friends with the gymnasts, so she ends up incorporating that into her routines. Now she uses her canon goggles to protect her from the burning eyes of prolonged smoke exposure when she uses fire.

When she meets a little pyromanic girl named Klee, she's thrilled that someone this chaotic and sure of herself exists.

#genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact noelle #genshin impact amber #genshin amber #genshin noelle #genshin impact circus au #genshin circus au #circus au #genshin impact fan art #genshin impact fanart #genshin fanart #genshin fan art #genshin noelle fanart #genshin amber fanart #genshin impact headcanons #genshin amber headcanons #genshin noelle headcanons #my art

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dbd-and-slashers-fics · 4 years ago

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Little miss starch here, back at it again. Actually, it's my birthday in 5 days (27th), so I have a special little request (or a big one I'm sorry for wasting your time). Can I get Evan, Frank, Danny/Jed, Herman and Michael and my request is this: plan me a birthday (or not planning, bc ig these are all murderers lmao) - so like, what they get me, is there a cake and what we doin that day - and if you want I can retweet this with my reactions bc I will love whatever you write let's be real here

(OMG!! HAPPY WOMB ESCAPE YOU CRISPY ROOT!! WOMB EVICTION IS SUPER GREAT DUDE LIKE WOW FINALLY MOVED OUT AND ARE LIVING IN A SHARE WOMB CALLED MOTHER EARTH. Wild. And heck yeah! Let me see those reactions! I’m glad you enjoy the writing! I’m trying!)

Evan Macmillan (The Trapper):

- Evan is a very classy and traditional guy. Get ready for a birthday party with a few friends, both survivor and killer. It’s a little awkward but it’s okay because it is your day and everyone understands that if they fuck it up, he’ll fuck them up. He’s probably got a nice ass cake he may have asked Sally and Bubba to bake, and a little present corner. He’ll also dress nice and make you dress nice too. No matter your style, even if he has to make you a stylish hobo. You’re gonna be the belle of the ball.

He’ll take you out on the town afterwards when everyone leaves. A sweet little walk in the park and a few awkward but sweet words. He isn’t great at expressing his total adoration for you, but you’ll get it anyways. He’ll melt if you smooch his cheek.

Frank Morrison (The Legion):

- Frank is the opposite of classy. First off, he’d start your birthday off with no cake. You and the gang go out for milkshakes or slushees and you can buy as many snacks as you want. Y’all just chill together for a few hours playing games, talking shit, playing with make up or outfits. This is the one time the only time that Frank will let you put makeup on him. So make him look ridiculous. Draw dickbutt on him, get that sweet sweet revenge for the time he drew on your face. After that, you two are sneaking up to the attic for some alone time. You guys can spend that time however you want (Lenny face), but after everything he’ll be giving you an entire talk about how glad he is that he’s met you and how important you are to him.

Probably made you a hand carved necklace piece. Something you hold dear to heart that you can wear all the time to remember him by and cheer you up when you’re down.

Michael Myers (The Shape):

- Michael doesn’t really do birthdays. He’s sort of been trapped in an asylum and he doesn’t have great memories. Now, if you told him it was your birthday, he might do some asking around about it. Expect to come home to a shitload of his hidden Halloween candy and fun activities you guys can do, like painting, cartoons, and paper mache.

Also get ready for him to carry you around on his back. A lot. He may seem like he is annoyed or doesn’t care, but inside he is actually really content because he hasn’t had this much fun before! He also loves you so there is that-

Danny Johnson (The Ghostface):

- Ah yes, Danny Johnson, a charismatically smug bastard and king of romance. We all know this doodoo head is a dork and is actually great at birthdays. As much as he loves the spotlight and loves popularity, he’ll actually give you a small surprise. Aside from a present, which would most likely be something he thought you might like so he stole it, he takes you out into the fleet with his camera. Just when you think you’re lost, he’ll sneak into some old, overgrown, ruined building you didn’t even know was there. He’ll make you follow him, and you’ll end up in a small clearing by a running river, right next to a sort of waterfall dip into a lake. It’s a very soothing and charming spot.

He then makes you take poses or just takes pictures of you doing whatever while complimenting and flirting the whole time. You two will end up under a willow tree somewhere while he tells you cheesy jokes and pick up lines. It’s a really calm day and he starts opening up about stories and telling you everything he loves about you. It’s really sweet and all about you!

Herman Carter (The Doctor):

- Herman is a wild man, we all know this. You probably expect him to serve you a still beating heart starched to a potato battery as a birthday cake. Honestly, any other time he would, but a birthday is important. At least, for him. It’s very rare for him to find something he feels anything towards, and the fact that he loves you is enough for him to make the effort.

He has no cooking skills, so he buys you your favorite flavor cupcake from a supermarket or bakery. He might even buy some extra treats for the both of you later on. He has a little stash of alcohol and music. He, like Danny, isn’t going to make a big gathering, mostly because everyone is scared shitless of him and also the Institute isn’t that great a place for party’s, you know, because of most of the rooms being bathrooms and what not.

He’ll play music on his phonograph and dance with you, read to you, and just overall be pleasant. This will also be the first time he takes off his head gear. And holy fuck, this man is so handsome when his eyes aren’t threatening to leave his skull.

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kenmas-consoles · 5 years ago

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Jdjcjcjcjjcjc Aye aye can I request for Tanaka with a 2nd yr s/o but since I'm uncreative it's like this: he hated/disliked her at first bc idk she seemed suspicious? But gradually with the help of the 3rd and 2nd yrs (not the 1st yrs, they'll ruin everything) he learned to be closer to her and accept her, but then ykyk plot happened and bo0m, they be dating u can choose if oneshot or hcs, whichever u prefer, also fem reader ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ᕗ ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ᕗ ᕕ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)ᕗ

Tanaka x Reader Request

Tanaka Ryuunosuke was a simple man. He loves women, he appreciates them, worships the ground they walk on but (y/n) was an exception to this. It wasn’t that she was ugly or unladylike, far from it actually. Except there was something about the girl that constantly made Tanaka feel somewhat weary and uneasy.

Sure she was pretty, well respected and popular, heck he even liked her at one point but after what he had saw in the middle of their first year made him realize she was what people would stereotype as the “kind fake”, at least he believed so. Everytime he saw her smile and offer someone help made his stomach churn, and not in a good way. Her smile and laugh haunted him and reminded him of that dreaded day.

It was 4 pm and classes had just ended, the boy had hurriedly packed up his belongings and rushed of to the gym in fear of being late and getting scolded by some upperclassman or worse Old man Ukai. This had caused a shiver to run up the boy’s spine imagining what kind of punishment he would have to endure if he were to be late.

“(Y/n)-chan. . .” A voice choked out, causing the boy to snap out of his daydream.

“It’s not funny,” the same small voice said.

This was coming from the back of the gym, taking a peak inside the gym door he noticed that no one was in there yet so he decided to check out the scene that was happening behind the gym.

With his back on the wall he had took a sideways glance at the scene before him. The scene had shocked the boy as there was a girl bawling her eyes out, before he could intervene and ask what was going on he heard laughter, one that he had grown to love for the past few months. He poked his head out a little more to see you with a couple of other friends smiling and laughing at the poor innocent crying girl.

'Sick' he thought, 'to think I like her, she made someone cry. . . and now she's laughing at them' Tanaka grumbled and left the scene as he had seen enough and didn’t want to be late for practice.

Although from behind the gym, and unknown to Tanaka, this was a little surprise (Y/n) planned for one of her friends.

The girl had brushed of a few stray tears that had escaped her eyes when she was laughing, "I'm sorry for laughing but ahahaha you should've seen your face. Who knew surprising you for your birthday would get you," the girl motioned to her friend, "like this." the continued in fits of laughter. From the corner of her eye she had saw Tanaka’s running figure that made a small smile grace her face.

One of (Y/n)’s friends looked over to where (Y/n) was staring at with a smile on her face and saw the same buzzed cut haired male, “Ooooh〜 does are little (Y/n)-chan have a crush?”

The said girl exploded into a vermillion red as she tried to deny all her friend’s teasing accusations

For the next following days Tanaka could barely look at (Y/n) without remembering the scene and how cruelly (Y/n) had been to the crying girl. Everytime she neared he would be sure to stay clear of her, he even had told his best friend Noya all about it just so he wouldn't fall hands into her trap. The girl albeit confused didn't mind much but she was still very much hurt that her crush was ignoring her.

Now that they were 2nd years, nothing much has changed since then. They were still classmates, Tanaka still thought she was fake, and (Y/n) still likes her chivalrous classmate. The only thing that has changed however is that (Y/n) is now more open to showing her interest in the buzz cut boy.

Which now leads us to our current situation.

“Tanaka-kun, do you want to be groupmates with me in this pair activity? I’m actually really good at (f/subject), so I really won’t be much of a burden.”

Tanaka’s eyes widened, if he was any other guy in his class or who he was last year then he’d be stoked that THE (L/n) (Y/n) was asking him directly to pair up with her. ‘Don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it, don’t fall for it’ he chanted in his head like a mantra.

“Ahah, sorry (L/n)-san but I’m already paired with (R/n).”

“Oh. . . I see, well maybe next time then?” The girl replied and looked up at him with expectant doe eyes.

Tanaka quickly averted his gaze and mumbled an inaudible ‘yeah sure’. He watched how (Y/n) skipped of to her friend circle and punched her friend in the arm. ‘There she goes again, pulling a 180 personality turn, how does no one see that??’ he thought to himself.

“A-ah, (R/n) let’s be partners for the pair work.” He had said clapping the boy on the back.

Meanwhile with (Y/n)

She skipped over to her circle of friends with a smile, “Oooh〜 does that mean prince charming accepted your proposal?” (F/n) asked with a smirk while the rest of the group sniggered. (Y/n) rolled her eyes and playfully glared at her friends. (F/n) gasped, “Is it a yes? My god he said yes. WE DID IT MR. STARK.”

(Y/n) playfully punched (f/n) in the arm and whined before dejectedly looking at the floor, “Well, actually. . . He said no. . ."

"Awweee, our poor baby"

"It's okay (Y/n)-chan"

"You want me to beat him up for you?"

(Y/n) shook her head as she turned around to see Tanaka with his arm around (R/n)'s shoulder.

★彡★彡★彡

Volleyball practice was yet to start as they were all gathered around in a circle waiting for Takeda-sensei to give some announcements.

“As you all are aware you have final exams starting next month, right?” Takeda started to which the quick freak duo and the rowdy second years paled at, “So, I think you know what I’m getting at, but if you fail any subjects supplementary classes will be held that weekend.”

Tanaka and Nishinoya shared a knowing look and were quick to try and bolt out the gym doors.

“Hey, There’s nowhere to run!” Daichi shouted after them, “Ennoshita, catch them!”

“Gaahhh, I can’t believe it,” Tanaka started as he laid face flat on the clubroom floors. “I’ve got no one to teach me, Saeko-nii would just laugh if I even mention trying to up my grades at this point.”

Sugawara laughed as he changed into a spare shirt, “I’m sure you’ll find someone.”

“What about you Suga-san?”

The said boy dismissively waved his hands, “What subject do you need help with anyway?”

“(F/subject).”

A lightbulb went up Suga’s head as he heard Tanaka’s reply.

“(Y/n)-chan is still your classmate right? You should go ask her, she’s really good at that subject,” Suga added, “Plus we went to cram school together and she’s pretty advanced, I could ask her for you.”

Daichi, overhearing the conversation mentioned that you spend a considerable amount of time in the library that he often sees you there one more than one occasion, “That and she’s really nice.” Daichi finished.

Tanaka had enough of this talk about you being all that as he stormed away from the clubroom, leaving Daichi and Suga to think Tanaka was so flustered he couldn’t take it anymore. The two looked at each other and hatched up a plan.

The following day Tanaka couldn’t help but notice Ennoshita, Daichi and Suga acting all suspicious during practice.

“Okay, what’s up with you three?” Tanaka questioned.

“Ah, it’s nothing, it’s nothing” Suga said with an overly nice smile that Tanaka swore he was almost getting cavities.

As the four continued their banter a certain (h/c)-ette had entered the gym in search for her Senpais.

“Suga-san, it’s really hard to believe you when you put on a face like that”

“Like what?”

“All I’m saying is you all are acting weird it’s like you all are up to something and I don’t buy it one b-

“Suga-senpai, Sawamura-senpai,” (Y/n) said with a small bow as she walks over to the quartet.

“Ahh (Y/n)-chan, nice to see you here.” Suga said patting the young girl’s head.

Daichi moved over to the pair so (Y/n) was inbetween Daichi and Suga. “(Y/n) here will tutor you so you wouldn’t have to worry about flunking your exams” Daichi boomed with a smile and a hand in the girl’s shoulder causing the girl to smile as well.

The trio smiled brightly at Tanaka, from across the gym Tsukishima squinted his eyes at the sight, “It looks like two parents handing over their child to an unwilling suitor” he said.

“Nice one Tsukki”

“Shut up Yamaguchi”

★彡★彡★彡

“Tanaka-kun, you have volleyball practice every Monday,Wednesday and Thursday right?” (Y/n) asked as they walked home together, something in which The third years had made the male do because ‘a girl shouldn’t be walking home alone at night’ Now here they stood walking three feet apart each other.

The boy hummed in reply, “So I was hoping you’d spend atleast an hour with me in the library after school on Tuesdays and Fridays and maybe thirty minutes on days when you have practice?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright, I can’t wait,” the girl said enthusiastically, “Can I have your phone number? For you know tutoring purposes”

This had made Tanaka stop dead in his tracks, ‘A girl wants my number?’ This was the first time the boy was asked for his number, regardless if he didn’t exactly like (Y/n) his heart fluttered all the same that caused a pink hue to spread on his cheeks. The girl had saw this and the same pink started dusting her own cheeks thinking she must have been too forward.

Tanaka coughed and fished out his cellphone and held it out towards the girl who gently took it with shaky fingers. Typing in her number she handed it back to the boy as they continued walking in silence, not noticing how close they seem to be walking now compared to the 3 foot distance they had minutes ago.

It has been a week and the two had only met up thrice to review over (fave/subject) in the library. The week had made Tanaka realize that the girl wasn’t all that bad company and he racked and questioned his mind and eyes if it were truly you who he saw at the back of the gym during your first years.

It was a Tuesday and the pair were working at the library, “You could use a break, you’re actually doing quite good so you deserve it.” The girl laughed. They were going over English today practicing grammar and vocab.

Tanaka had stretched his arms out on the table which caused the girl to laugh a little more, which soured Tanaka’s mood. ‘There’s that laugh, it’s no denying, that same laugh burned in the back of his mind as he replayed the scene all over again’

“I’m going to grab some thing to drink I’ll be back in a few.” The boy said and hurriedly left. Tanaka was hunched next to a vending machine aggressively chugging down a Calpico drink mumbling what a fool he’s been fraternizing with the enemy.

Was she really the enemy though?

Tanaka managed to carry himself all the way back up to the library seeing as he was abusing his “break time”, might as well go back to work then right? As the boy walked towards the table he had so “kindly” left you at he saw your figure a few tables past your original one playing with a 5 year old boy.

The boy was finger gunning the girl who was taking a step towards him in a zombie motion and the girl silently acted as though she was getting shot. The little boy giggled before ducking behind the table and continuing this pattern.

“Ah, Hibiki I think the young girl’s boyfriend is here for her now.” The librarian said to the child who looked mildly upset that he couldn’t play with the older female anymore. The boy waved goodbye towards the girl and (Y/n) happily waved back. The girl then turned her head towards Tanaka who was frozen where he stood when the old woman called him your boyfriend.

“Tanaka-kun looks funny, did you enjoy your break?”

“I had a Calpico”

“Sounds refreshing” the girl replied with a laugh.

The two continued on with their prepping for English and had come across a word that Tanaka had a hard time comprehending.

“Surprise?”

“Yeah, it’s an english expression, it means to be shocked about something you weren’t expecting. Hmm, when was the last time Tanaka-kun was surprised?” The girl had asked to keep the ball rolling.

“Well the team surprised me on my birthday sometime ago, I was really taken aback and couldn’t help but cry a little.”

“Oh, back during my first year we threw a huge surprise party for my friend at the back of the gym. We got her a cake and everything, she cried too, it was really funny-“

‘Wait. . . What?!’ Tanaka had thought. The pressure building inside him was intense, ‘God, was that what happened? I TOTALLY MISINTERPRETED’

“Surprised.” Tanaka said in english. He totally wouldn’t be forgetting that anytime soon. The boy felt bad for judging her all these years and guilt was literally creeping up on him that he actually found it hard to breath. He felt like such an idiot, for not reading into the scene correctly and for mistreating (Y/n). He needed someway to make it up to her, but what?

“Do you want me to walk you home today?” The question came out before he could think.

The girl tried to hide a smile, “That would be great.”

The two had grown significantly closer since then much to (Y/n)’s friends and the Karasuno’s third years pleasure as they’ve been rooting for them for the longest time. Tanaka would ask to stay and review longer with the said girl even if h could barely understand but he made an extra effort to impress her so he took a considerable amount of prep work at home much to his sister’s surprise. This had earned him a bit of teasing, he endured it all just for the sake of his pride, and the volleyball summer camp.

The day of the exams rolled in and Tanaka was actually extra nervous about this. There was 4 exams to take and everything (Y/n) taught him was slowly scuttling out the window. Regardless he answered what he could making a few guesses here and there. Now all that was left was to wait for the results.

“Ito-san”

“Hai!”

Tanaka had his head in his hands staring up at the teacher who was calling onto students to give back their test papers.

“Watanabe-san”

“Hai!”

‘It’s okay. . .’

“Sato-san”

“Hai. . .”

‘It’s okay. . .’

“Tanaka-san”

‘Shit’

“Hai!” He said standing up abruptly making his chair screech from behind him. Every step he took closer to Nakamura-sensei felt heavy, upon receiving his papers he quickly bunched it up and decided to look at it later. (Y/n) wasn’t present in class as she was pulled out for club activities and he thought he should save looking at his grade for when they would meet up later.

(Y/n) was standing outside the gym doors leaning against the balls of her feet waiting for a certain buzzed cut male. Tanaka saw her standing there and was bouncing his leg up and down exhaling as he made his move to advance towards her, “(L/n)-san!” He called out.

“Yknow we’ve known each other for a while now, so you can call me (Y/n) if you’d like”

“A-ah, okay then, anyways the test results came out. . .”

“How’d they go?”

“Well, I haven’t exactly saw it yet, I was hoping to show you and find out together. . .”

A smile graced it’s way on the girl’s face, finding courage she grabbed on to his hand and gave a firm reassuring nod as he dug for the results in his bag.

(Fave/subject)- 83/100

Math- 42/100

English- 66/100

Science- 46/100

Tanaka stared at his papers in disbelief. This was the highest he’d scored since primary school. The girl flung her arms around his neck as the boy gripped her waist and swung her around in happiness, laughing in sheer mirth of the moment. Tanaka slowed as their laughter died down, eyes locking onto each other.

Suga and Daichi was hiding behind the bush watching them. They fistbumped at the success of getting the two together. Tsukki and Yamaguchi were heading towards the gym at the exact moment Tanaka and (Y/n) were leaning into a kiss.

"Now, kiss" he said aloud.

"Uwoooohh Tsukishima what are you talking about? huh, is that Tanaka-san?"

"Oi Boke don't watch them."

"WAAAHH GO GET SOME RYUUUUUU"

"Ne ne Tsukki do you think they're dating?"

Daichi and Suga face palmed at the ruined moment.

#haikyuu #haikyuu fanart #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuuxreader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu oneshot #haikyuu tanaka #tanaka ryuunosuke #tanaka x reader #tanaka ryuunosuke x reader

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ladyalice101 · 6 years ago

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Just read your fic "you gave all you had (and now i am whole)" on AO3 (I'm KaisaSegher there, btw) and let me just say it was amazing! I'm sorry if I'm repeating myself here, but it truly was. Thank goodness we have people like you to fix the mess D&D made, really. THIS is what should have happened, at some point. Heck, in my mind it will. What are your thoughts on the finale? Any favourite headcanons you'd like to share? Anyway, keep your amazing work! Big hug

ok ok ok i just typed this huge ass response to this and tumblr has swallowed it and deposited it in the aether, but i will retype though perhaps more briefly haha.

so firstly, THANK YOU. you aren’t repeating yourself but even if you were i would still LOVE this bc you went to the effort to not only tell me you loved it once, but TWICE. you’re so kind and you have no idea how much it means to me. truly, thank you.

so the finale - i dont have much to say that hasn’t already been said, but i still will answer!

my biggest issue is that there was no release of tension. we spent 8 season with these protagonists, with their hopes and dreams, and not a single one of them got what they wanted.

jon wanted to find a place to belong - i would argue he found that with sansa, though i know others disagree. some probably say that he found a place amongst the wildlings (and yes i do think this is true on some level), and i could probably be happier about jon’s ending being north of the wall if not for the way they framed it. we have a montage of jon getting back to castle black (the place he left bc he was fucking MURDERED there), and then we have him ride out north of the wall with sad music playing behind (notably jon doesn’t smile ONCE), and the camera is positioned inside the wall as the gate closes on jon, who is looking back over his shoulder, signifying that jon can’t go south again and he’s really upset about it. maybe if he smiled a bit. a quirk of his lips as the gate closed, or as he rode into the forest. but no. nope.

sorry, but i really can’t find it in myself to find that ‘sweet’ in any way. it’s just straight up bitter. it’s just straight up sad.

sansa - my girl deserved to get agency over herself, and that’s why i like her being queen. the north deserved a queen as good as sansa. but? where is the personal fulfilment? sansa’s entire arc was about her romantic naiveté being ripped from her, so where was the full circle moment where she realises that life isn’t hopeless? where she and we get the fulfilment of realising that she was right all along, that there is magic is falling in love and being loved.

so like cool she was ‘trained’ to be queen and she is, but that’s not what her arc was about and to reduce it to that is upsetting.

i won’t get in to arya and bran - bc i’d just be repeating myself with the whole ‘they should be with family like they all fought for for 8 seasons’, or repeating other’s who have articulated the problems much better.

but they tried to sell us some whack bs this season man.

life isn’t shit and then you die and it’s fucked up that they tried to tell us that it is.

oh no, of course, i’m forgetting the two characters who deserved to get the happy endings that they did - tyrion and bronn! those two did such great things in the show and they deserved to be the only two were rewarded with everything they ever wanted!

ha. ha ha ha. i’m going to cry myself to sleep.

so why does this matter so much to me?

when i first started watching got, my personal life was extremely different to what it is now. that’s to be expected, of course, because it’s been four years. i won’t go in to TOO much detail, bc shit’s about to get really fucking personal even though you didn’t ask hahaha, but earlier this year i was diagnosed with a genetic mutation called BRCA1 which basically means that my lifetime chance of getting breast cancer is 80% (it’s 12% for other women) and 40% for ovarian cancer (which, from memory, is 2% for other women). so my chance are pretty high. i got tested bc my mum got breast cancer late last year, and we have a family history, so she was tested for the BRCA1 mutation and was found positive. i decided to get tested, too. (my mum just finished treatment last month and it’s looking really good for her, thank GOD).

god do i know that this is not the worst thing that i could have been diagnosed with but i’m only 21 and i have to get 6 monthly clinical exams and scans done. by the time i’m 30 i’ll probably have had to have gotten a double mastectomy, and by the time i’m 40 i have to have had all my reproductive organs removed - ovaries, fallopian tubes, uterus, all of it.

so. i’m 21. i’m single, and quite a romantic. i don’t expect to have found my life partner in the next few years, and i expect even less to be married by the time i’m 30. i’m facing the very real possibility of not being able to carry my own child, of not being able to breastfeed any child i do have.

sure, not the worst, but it’s not great - but what does it do to my romantic prospects? at worst, it would turn men away (not that i’d want those weakass men that can’t see past that but you get the point), at best it would likely create some tension at some point.

and do you know what got taught me this year?

that life is shit and then you die.

so amidst all of that fucking bullshit in my life, game of thrones s8 barged in and told me that the characters that i identify with (the sansa’s, the jon’s) they don’t get a happily ever after, despite what they hope for, what they want. they sacrifice everything, they go through all of that bullshit, just to never fall in love, just to be punished for doing the right thing.

now maybe you read all of that and you’re like “oh that’s sad about the brca thing but i dont see what that has to do with got and maybe you should seperate them and move on” like most people in my life have told me. and trust me, one day i probably will. i want to now, but unfortunately i can’t.

and that’s what upset me. media isn’t supposed to do that, isn’t supposed to make you so upset about your own life. they can claim realism all they want, but if they wanted to be realistic they wouldn’t have fucking thrown out arcs and stories and people having like actual consequences for their actions. realism is not just ‘there are no happy endings in real life’.

so, in conclusion, game of thrones ruined my life. haha nah, but, really? they couldn’t have given us some sweet with that bitter?

anyway. WHOO. that’s a long ass reply. as for headcanons - i don’t really have much tbh but if i think of some i’ll put them in a post. if there’s headcanons around a specific thing you want to see, then send me a message/ask bc you’ll probably prompt my imagination and i want to give you everything.

otherwise thank you SO much for reading my story and this reply! xxx

#ask #got #got finale #jonsa #jon x sansa

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kamotoshi · 3 years ago

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FRANNY!!!! IM SO GLAD YOU'RE BACK 😭😭😭 so many of my fav writers have jumped ship from this hellsite (as they should) and I miss every last one of them!! I've been obsessed with genshin impact and I'm juggling two jobs which make me super tired especially since one is retail. But I'm trying to get back into reading again (and maybe writing 👀) and I recently read Iron Widow which is an interesting YA novel involving giant mechas fighting each other, kickass feminism, and a adorable polyamorous relationship! Next up on my list is These Violent Delights and Six Crimson Cranes ( ◜‿◝ )♡ I've also decided to go back to grad school to get my teaching credential. Tbh... I'm still on the fence about it but I do have experience teaching/tutoring. I wanna find something I'm passionate about but also provides me stability but it's really rough out here girl 😫😫😫

But enough about me!! How have you been??? Have you been eating well??? Drinking water?? Any plans for the upcoming holidays??? I hope everything gets better for you, you deserve it!

*hugs* I'm so glad you're back 🥺

-🌻 (maybe I'll get off anon one day hehe)

🌻 ANON!! omg I'm literally soooo happy to see you again what the HECK 🥺 lol I'm still halfway off this ship but shit I just like yall a lil too much 😂 AH retail is exhausting sis I get it but damn idk how you’re out here working all that time so shoot out to you for that but please make sure you take care of yourself okay 🥺 I’m glad you’re trying to find the time to do things that interest you and I hope you can start writing if that’s what you wanna do! and yes I fully support you in your journey to find what you’re passionate about. I wanted to go to grad school overseas next year but didn’t win the scholarship I high key needed so we’re not doing that anymore LMAO (at least not right now bc it’s not a good financial move for me at all) 😅 so believe me I know how rough it is out there. I’m thankful for the job I have but I’m still such a ways away from the career that I’m passionate about. I have faith in us tho for sure and I got your back! 😤

as far as lil old me, nothing much has changed. I’m still me, just with a few more heartbreaks in my repertoire but more bad bitch energy than before 🥺 got a lot going on and things have been literally insane but I'm working on getting my work-life balance down and rediscovering the things that make me happy, which is why I've returned 😂 don’t really have plans for the holidays, just family time!

I'm glad to see you in my inbox again 🥺 I hope that everything works out for you and you know you can talk to me literally whenever, whether you choose to be on or off anon I'm here with hugs ready!! :)

#hangouts with fran!#[🌻 anon]#i missed you bb!#so happy you're still around this hellsite #I wish you nothing but the best ❤️

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suddenlystorm · 8 years ago

Text

I'M ENTITLED TO MY OWN FEELINGS

I feel like I need to put that in caps to get my point across. There’s this total possibility that what I could be feeling right now is wrong, could be the most appropriate feelings, who the heck knows! You wanna know what I do know? That I’m entitled to my own feelings regardless if they’re wrong or right. Another thing you wanna know? This is my blog. A place for me to vent, put my thoughts into words that I can read. That I can go back on and read after I’ve gotten some clarity, so that I can really understand them. I feel like I need to say this because of what I’m about to vent about. I feel like it might cause something. It might not. Hell, I have no idea if you or her even still look at my blog although I’m betting my graduate school education that you both do. So before I read or receive any backlash please refer to the entire paragraph above about my feelings.

So here it goes..

You’re married! Or so my sources told me so and then my creeping told me so. And to be completely honest [sarcasm] I find this the most funniest thing in the universe. But hey, congrats! I’m happy for you (on a serious note I am) and I won’t go into super detail of ALLLL my feelings toward this because it would be mean and I don’t want to be mean just in case either of you read this. And also if I said it, it could come off as jealously which is (surprisingly) one of the feelings I’m not feeling. (Yay for me growing and coming to terms with things! I give myself props bc it took a long damn time - about two years to be exact). One of the most prominent feelings is anger and I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA why I’m feeling this more anything. Okay maybe a little. I feel like a little bit of the spotlight, the happiness, has been taken away from me. I get engaged and bam two days later you get engaged. I get married (secretly, no one but immediate family and close friends know) and what do you fucking know BAM you get married. I feel like to outsiders we look like a fucking joke. I’m going wedding dress shopping in a few days, I’m looking at venues, figuring out my bridesmaids, colors, the date, everything, and then I find this out and I feel mad and a little sad. This is suppose to be the happiest time for me and it’s being taking away. It’s not you, it’s not her, and I know it’s not intentionally bc who would do that, right? I’m just getting caught up in all my feels. And I feel like no one can really understand me. I feel like people will say if I vent to them that I shouldn’t be feeling this way or that there is no reason to feel this way. Well I have every right to feel this way. I can’t control my feelings. It’s something I have been struggling with my entire life. I can’t make these feelings go away. I can’t shut them off, I can’t really talk about them to anyone, but Abby. She understands what I’m feeling even though she isn’t going through it. But she knows. It’s weird to be honest. We always know what the other is thinking or feeling. We feel it with each other and for that I’m grateful. I’m not going through this alone. I wish, I really wish I could vent this way to Jake. But I can’t. He HATES you. He makes me feel like my feelings are wrong or shouldn’t exist when it comes to you. And that’s unfair. I’m having to fake it in front of him while I’m going through something and needing his support. Anyways this post isn’t about him. It’s about this. Whatever this is. This feeling I’m having. It’s unfair. I understand it’s unfair to you as you read this, but honestly it’s not my problem. You could stop reading, I’m just venting here. I feel like I’m babbling at this point when I know I want to say more, how do I put it into words.

You still mean so much to me. You always will. But it’s in a different kind of way now, and I think you know what I’m saying. Bc you feel it too, it’s just hard to describe. Anyways, I’m getting off point. At least I feel that way. I’m getting distracted. I had something I was going to say and it went away and now idk what I was going to say. Fuck. I’m happy. You’re happy. But our newfound happiness doesn’t discredit the happiness we once had together and I feel like that needed to be said. Thank you for four years together plus another two of friendship. Thank you for making me as happy as you did. Thank you for everything you did for me. Thank you for growing as adults with me. Thank you for teaching me how to love and to be loved. Bc we both know I didn’t know either. It was a hard love, me and you. But we figured it out. We were shitty to each other at the end. Equally. We both thought the other treated the other worse. But it was equally. I figured that out eventually. Everyone feels their own way and what I thought wasn’t bad or shouldn’t have hurt you, did; and vise versa. We figured out how to be happier with someone else. We figured out what was right and what was wrong and how to make our new relationships even better. However we cannot forget the foundation of that. Of what got us here to this point. So once again THANK YOU (not sarcastically) because I’m being treated the way I should and I don’t tolerate anything less bc of you. I’m treating him extremely better bc I learned. And now I couldn’t be happier. I am full of love and happiness. And yes, there’s hard times like there will always be, but I know how to handle that now.

So yeah, I’m feeling anger and sadness right now. But I want to be understood. I don’t want to be told how wrong I am for this because I am not. I am fully letting go.

And one last thing… I miss my friend. Not only did I lose you as a lover, as my future, but I lost my best friend. And I’ve moved on from the relationship aspect of us (as I said we are both very much happy with our counterparts) but I haven’t moved on from losing my friend. I got my closure from you for everything but that. And I think all these feelings I’m feeling. All this confusion of why I’m mad and sad comes down to that.

I’m happy for you and the life you’re building for yourself. I truly am. It’s everything you wanted that I couldn’t give to you. And I’m chasing my dreams that I don’t think you could have given me, but someone has and someone has for you. That’s what is important here. We both got what we wanted, and I can’t say this enough, but we are happy with where our lives are at (as it seems for you, there’s only so much info people tell me and I have access too. That sounds really stalkerish, I know).

So there’s my feelings. All jumbled up and confusing, but isn’t that what feelings are?

By the way can I just say how cool elephants are? 😄

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