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rigelmejo · 2 months ago

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So I like to find older language learning textbooks, or just specific ones. I could make some posts on them if anyone would be interested. I have some weird ones, and then some genuinely useful ones, and rather old ones which are a mix.

Some of my favorites:

German Through Pictures: learn like a child, or like me and my friend in high school translated to each other (with pictures!) when we didn't speak the same language. It is a simple book, but very easy and you WILL learn some basics. Its simple, its a nice idea.

This book is very cheap used, I found it at a library book store sale for 4 dollars.

Read Japanese Kanji Today: there's an older version of this book, equally good. This book is free in a lot of digital libraries (a lot of college libraries have it in ebook form, if you are on an app like Libby or Hoopla it's worth searching). A kanji mnemonic stories book that is not dauntingly huge. Good for beginners to wrap their heads around how to start studying Kanji. Be aware, it doesn't cover much, so don't spend too much time studying it if you're trying to make progress (not like perfectionist me in college who... was too obsessed with memorizing and so I never finished reading this).

https://archive.org/details/jensen-arthur-le-francais-par-la-methode-nature

Le Francais Par Le Methode Nature: I have this book to thank for getting comfortable learning French in French, for getting comfortable reading more, and I love the teaching style. I love textbooks written in The Nature Method, where they teach entirely in the language. The Arthur Jensen books in particular (and a few others of this time period) have 3000+ common words and a good overview of grammar taught, setting you up to transition to regular daily conversations and novel/news reading after The Nature Method textbook. My ideal. I wish desperately for a book like this in chinese or japanese. I've thought for hours about how to add pinyin for hanzi, romaji and hiragana below kanji for japanese, in order to make it still equally comprehensible to start seeing regular chinese and japanese text immediately. Chinese or Japanese would need more pictures for explanation, since there's less cognates. But i really think a similarly designed textbook would be very achievable. But I do not confidently know chinese or japanese grammar enough to try to translate English by The Nature Method into Chinese or Japanese. If someone does, I'd love to talk cost for that kind of translation job. I'd need that base text translation, then I could draw pictures and add pinyin and romaji/hiragana myself... (or also do what one great person did when he wrote a tiny Comprehensible Input japanese site - use emojis).

Anyway. I love these type of books. I wish more existed desperately. There's a French, English, and Italian one. There's also textbooks written with the same "all taught IN the target language" approach - a Greek one called Athenaze, and a Latin one called Lingua Latina.

Be aware because of the age of some of these, some language info is outdated. But for me the sheer VOLUME of nonstop practice reading the language makes up for a few issues of age.

French for Beginners by Charles Duff: I love the way Duff teaches, lots of practice reading immediately. He has a Beginner Spanish textbook I also got, and also love.

Chinese Grammar Self Taught by John Darroch: this book is NOT actually the nature method. I got a hard copy that's really old. Its lovely and has gold lettering on the cover. The book uses an old pronunciation system so its easier to go into this book if you already know how hanzi are pronounced or have an alternative source for that. If you're a nerd like me who Likes seeing the old pronunciation system, the older language features (like le being liao more, like the use of nin instead of ni more often), the print hanzi back then? Its really cool. The grammar lessons are also very easy to read - probably my favorite grammar explanations I've read. The section in the beginning explaining hanzi radicals and the types of hanzi, the sound+meaning type and symbolic type, on its own makes the book worth it. After reading that section, hanzi made so much more sense to me, got easier to remember and learn. I just think its a really neat book. It also has a dictionary of about 2000 hanzi in the back. Which serves as both a good vocabulary list and practice going through a/stroke order dictionary. The grammar book also teaches a decent number of words. A very useful little book.

Its the polar opposite of a chinese textbook I once had that only taught 200 words and made me so mad i donated it and forgot the name of it.

Japanese in Thirty Hours: this book is free on some univerity sites, if you search google itself or another web search. I bought a physical copy for 9 dollars. Its my favorite beginner grammar book for japanese - in particular, because it describes a few grammar points in a way that I found helpful. Also, like the chinese book above, this book pulls its weight! A lot of information in a small book. It has over 1000 words in the back vocabulary section you can study, a TON of grammar explanations and sentence drills to practice, easy to read, and the book's goal is to get you speaking (with the use of a dictionary/looking up key words you need to say) ASAP. It does it's job. The sentences are a bit unnatural, but so is Genki's sentences (like saying watashi wa so much even though in Japanese it wouldn't be explicitly stated so much).

Reading Japanese by Hamoko Ito Jordan, Eleanor Harz, Chaplin: I love learning a language by DOING. So I love this book. It's a bit slow paced for me (but only since I'm not an absolute beginner). It's a great, dense book of 624 pages. You practice reading all hiragana, katakana, 425 kanji, and a ton of example words and kanji. Even though I can read somewhat, the katana section of this book is intense even for me in that it makes me practice reading a TON of katakana words and situations in order to get the learner truly comfortable with encountering the writing system and reading it. There's also a companion grammar book by them, Beginning Japanese. Due to the very general title you'l need to search author names to find these books.

Weird bits: unique romaji system. I was fine with it, since I already knew the pronunciations of everything I saw in this book, from prior study. If you're an absolute beginner though, it would be worth it to learn the regular romaji system and hiragana/katakana romaji sound representations in it before starting this book.

Beginning Chinese Reader by John DeFrancis: note that you can find this cheap used sometimes, and very expensive other times. My copies were around 60 dollars a piece because the books were out of print and rare at the time. There's several books in the series: Beginning Chinese Reader 1 and 2, Intermediate Chinese Reader 1 and 2, and Advanced Chinese Reader. (Pdfs can be found online if you go searching).

The positive: 1200 hanzi are taught, and thousands more words (tons of combininations of the hanzi into many words). The main plus of these books is sheer volume of reading practice. Its TONS of reading practice, thousands of pages.

There's graded readers nowadays which are more entertaining with funner stories, but they are short. My mandarin companion stories were very short, my Sinolingua Books were quite thin, and most of my "beginner" reading in chinese ended up being easier novels in chinese (like tu tu da wang, xiao wang zi, sa ye and simpler written B)) because I just could not find thousands of pages of gradually increasing difficulty graded readers (although Pleco does offer a decent amount of some condensed versions of stories like Legend of the Monkey King, etc).

So yeah, the plus: huge amount of reading material to internalize hanzi and new words, and get really comfortable reading.

The negatives: its old. Old cultural details, old language things that don't all apply anymore, the technology words we have now didnt exist when it was written. And its written so dry and boring, unfortunately. For me, the elements that age it help me get interested in catching those, enough so that i can get myself to read it. But the material itself? Boring (at least in the beginning).

Regardless, I find the concept of these textbooks to be wonderful. I would love to find some modern chinese textbook series that provides over 1000 pages of graded reading, with words repeated at intervals to reinforce memory of them. If you know of any (even with just 400 pages practice reading that gradually teaches more words) please let me know.

Madrigals Magic Key to Spanish: I love this book. I have Madrigal's books for Spanish, French, and German. I read this spanish one over the course of a summer once, it probably helped me get better at reading Spanish. It works excellently in combination with Language Transfer Spanish podcast, and if you like learning materials that teach based on similarities to what you might already know in your native language (grammar similarities, cognates) and clear explanations of language patterns (showing how adjective word endings are sometimes X like -ent in english or french "intelligent") then this book's teaching style will work well for you. And, like many of my favorite books, it teaches a LOT of words.

So! That is a snippet of some of the language books I have. I've got a lot more... I love checking out textbook methods and the variety so I tend to look for them whenever I see used books.

#rant #books #rec list

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ink-and-dagger · 2 years ago

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HIII god I never use this app but I really needed to tell you how much I love your work, you are my new inspiration as an aspiring writer ily 😭 Your Silco fic really stuck with me, I've been reading fan works for like 8 years and I never felt so many emotions reading something on that site I'm not kidding, it's *chef kiss*, you are an incredible writer I hope you know that 🤍 On the other hand, if you don't mind I wanted to get an insight on how you work and what your writing process is with the characters and everything. I've been wanting to start writing for so long but never know how to start, mainly because I don't know how to get characters to stay in character and not make them feel OOC (and bc English is not my main language 🥲). I envy that a lot from many authors such as yourself and I could only hope for that level of skill, it's amazing 🥺 That's all, I'll be here waiting to read more of your works about anything or from any fandom really, you are great! Thank you in advance :) <3

Holy moly those are some huge compliments 😭 thank you so much ❤️ I’m so glad my story struck a chord with you.

I think you're literally incredible for even being able to contemplate writing a fic in a language that isn't your mother tongue. My personal belief is that story > writing. There are plenty of books out there that are beautifully written and boring as ass. There are also lots of books that have moved people to tears despite being averagely written. The words you use are merely a tool to communicate your story, and if your readers are invested in the world and characters you've created, then they will forgive imperfect writing.

I've answered a few writing questions in the past that might be of use/interest to you. I'll link them below:

How I plot my stories

How I came up with the outline for DWM

How to stop obsessing over edits

But in terms of your concerns around characterisation – I know it sounds wildly obvious... but you just kinda have to make sure you know that character inside and out.

It helps to build some kind of dossier alongside your outline that you can use as a reference sheet. This can contain whatever information you want, but here are some ideas to get you started:

Personality traits [both good and bad]

Likes and Dislikes

Special Skills/Abilities [plus anything they're rubbish at]

Fears and Desires

Important Relationships [do they have family and/or friends?]

It's also super important to familiarise yourself with the little details too. Real, relatable people don't walk around with their 'biggest qualities' plastered above their heads for all to see.

If you asked someone who works with me to quickly describe me, they wouldn't say – "Oh that's Inky. She values loyalty, her zodiac sign is Virgo, and she has mummy&daddy issues."

They'd more likely say something along the lines of – "Oh that's Inky. She's very friendly, likes to work with her AirPods in, and tends to fall over a lot."

It's these little details that flesh out a character and make them feel more real.

Try and envision your character in different mundane situations. What pizza would they order? How would they react to slow wi-fi? If their favourite song came on the radio whilst they were alone would they sing and dance? If they found money on the street what would they do?

A practical tip whilst writing is to read their dialogue out loud as them. Does it sound right? Can you hear them saying it? Think about their language and speech patterns. Think about what they're trying to communicate, but also whether they're attempting to withhold anything.

And lastly in terms of getting started writing...

I'm sorry my friend. The only way to start is to start...

I recently looked back at some old writing files from when I first began writing as an adult in late 2019. And believe me when I tell you that it has all the elegance of Donald trump in a pair of kitten heels. It’s awful.

But that’s okay. Because I knew when I was writing it that it was for my eyes only, and that I’d look back on it one day and think "wowee I've improved a butt ton!" And of course I was completely correct because I'm a Virgo and also INFJ so 💁🏻‍♀️

My point is, writing is a skill, and skills need to be practiced and honed. You have to allow yourself to be shit first, or you will never get good.

Open up a blank file and write a sentence. Doesn't matter what it is. Just write it. Save it in a private file just for you. Create a safe place where you can learn and make mistakes without any pressure.

And remember that even seasoned authors don't produce perfect writing from the get go. You put down a rough draft first. Then you go through and make it more coherent. Then fill in any gaps you left. Then tweak the order of events. Then finesse the language etc etc etc... It's a multi-step process, just like painting a picture. There's no point in attempting to add lighting and shade on top of a pencil sketch that doesn't even have any base colour on it yet.

WOW I'm rambling. I'm gonna wrap up, but as you can tell this is a topic I'm passionate about, and I'm more than happy to answer any more questions you might have!

I hope this is helpful in some way <3

#inky answers #writing advice

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sizhui · 1 year ago

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Honestly i do see your point with the post about fanfiction, but on the other hand having been in fandom spaces since very young (probably too young to be honest) I've just come to absolutely distrust fanfic writers (especially on ao3 because well. I'm sure you're well aware of the culture on that site) because on multiple occasions i have been hit by random unexpected graphic (very clearly fetishistic) depictions of abuse in works that seemed pretty solid otherwise based on the summary alone; incest fans are especially egregious for including that aspect with no warning whatsoever in what seems like an otherwise interesting story about two brothers from the summary alone, so like... as much as i agree that we don't need to tag every single generally harmless detail of a story because it significantly dumbs it down and ruins the experience it's also true that whenever i have branched out and tried reading stories that seemed interesting from the summary alone and had a minimal amount of tags i ended up getting bitten by one of my biggest triggers so i feel like... i might as well just read actual published literature (which i do regularly for fun and for school) when seeking something more challenging and with unexpected elements since the culture around fanfiction is just too rancid for me to trust fic writers to tag the appropriate amount and not just deliberately hide "problematic" (=abuse fetish) elements to jumpscare people for fun. So it's like yeah you have a point but it's a bit of a conundrum since a lot of fic writers aren't actually into this to say anything constructive. I'm sorry if it's worded badly English isn't my first language and my tone sometimes doesn't come off great through text so I'm not accusing you of anything or being confrontational. Anyway i hope you have a good day o7

I get you honestly, but I purposefully didn't touch upon the toxic, abusive CULTURE around fanfic and ao3 which actively protects harmful fetishizers and real abusers too - because that's a whole other very serious conversation to be had. My post sought to discuss fanfic purely as a type of watered-down, half-premade story and how it affects the way readers interact with original fiction. I did not discuss the huge problems with illegal content being hosted on fanfic sites because to do that i would have to sit down and write for a long time with utmost concentration, which I have neither time nor will for rn.

I will however say that if my post came off as "keep reading solely fanfic, just without tags, to chaenge yourself" then i failed to express myself correctly. I absolutely meant to convey that the primary focus of every reader should be published original fiction and nonfiction, because the things you can get out of them you won't find in any fic, since the fic culture and system is already established and truthfully a 3 note post will never affect it.

However, though I too havr major triggers, I am not averse to the practice of writing fanfic. I firmly believe that there are just as many perverse individuals among writers of original stories as there are among fanfic writers - abuse fetishism isn't unique to people who write about cartoons, they just got themselves a huge website where they can publish their works for free and expose an audience to it, so the problem gapes open and very obvious. However, there are thousands of people who use writing as outlets for their sick sexual fantasies who have never touched fandom spaces - it's just that you'll more rarely stumble upon their works because it's not as easy to publish them professionally (though look at shit like a song of ice and fire... i find it just as distasteful as some third grade torture porn fic) in conclusion, I don't really think that fandom spaces breed weirdos, i think they just give them an outlet and a spotlight. I may be biased because i've been into writing character studies and alternate endings to stories i liked since i was young, i just dont elevate those so much and call them proper literature and hide behind them like annoying ao3 aunties do.

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songsofbloodandwater · 1 year ago

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People are seriously sleeping on the White Numen Tarot, and Numen theory in general.

If you consider yourself to be an animistic witch or tarot reader (or both), this post is for you. The White Numen Tarot by AlbaBG is a tarot deck where the imagery is focused on the animals, not the people, and specifically based on the concept of numen as described by the author of El Animal Divino (1985), a wonderful piece on the philosophy of religion.

In El Animal Divino (The Divine Animal), Gustavo Bueno identifies Numen as the "center of Will and Intelligence", and adds,

"in classical latin sources, [numen] references a center of effective and potent desire. [...] In the classics, many times, instead of will itself, it reflects the corporeal expression of will, specifically the nodding of the head that expresses willingness (numine capitum). It also represents the Affirmation or Willingness of the Gods (numine deorum), or the Gods themselves (simulacra numinum being the Statues of the Gods), or wild genii (silvarum numina fauni)".

The tarot deck reflects this by adding two extra cards on the deck, "White Numen" and "Black Numen". While both signify the presence of numen influencing the situation, which card is pulled indicates the nature of said influence into the situation, whether it is creative or destructive, additive or corrosive, enlightening or obscuring.

If you add into that the imagery of each animal and their meaning, their actions and how that relates back to the concept of numen (in this case, signified by specific animals with specific associations doing specific actions in each card) you can get very deep messages that are surprisingly easy to read. Add in any UPGs that you may have (associations of certain animals to particular Gods or Spirits, or just in regards to omens and signs) and you get even more possible meanings that are, again, deep yet very clear, particularly for more seasoned practitioners.

And I think that's a very useful tool to utilize if you want to take into account not just the human influences over a situation, but also the non-human, the divine, the spirits, and anything and everything numen. You can choose to read the animal meanings metaphorically (if no Numen card shows up in your reading) or literally (as in, an omen, a sign or a divine message, if one of the two, or both, Numen cards show up in your reading). It puts the reading into perspective to include the wider spiritual ecosystem and I just think that's neat.

Honestly, just the fact it introduced me to El Animal Divino is great by itself, because it's a book that has helped to put into words and deepen my understanding of religion in general, but also specifically of animal cults and how they relate to human and non-human spirits. But it doesn't stop there, having the deck allows you to identify and even communicate with said numen and thus it's one of the many ways to apply the theory of the book, into magical practice. It's a tool with a really cool theory behind it that is laid out in the open for anyone who may want to take it and adapt it into their practice.

The only problem? I don't know if the book has an english translation. So far i've only been able to find it in spanish, but hey, it's definitely worth at least an attemp at translation on any of the many translation sites you can find online.

#El Animal Divino #Gustavo Bueno #animism #folk witch #animal worship #animal religion #My notes #White Numen Tarot #numen #tarot community #animistic witch #Blood and Water

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drfaustus · 1 year ago

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hey, my name is lynne. i saw a screenshot of one of your posts on pinterest and i was so excited because i recently got into Marlowe, and your profile looked like you knew the guy’s works well.

i joined tumblr just to talk to you for a sec. do you know if there are any good marlowe annotations i can buy? im pretty young and its difficult for me to understand most of his writing. i read Dr faustus and Hero & leander so far but it was definitely a struggle

and just any other tips for reading his work? what order, stuff to know, whatever?

thanks dude

hey!! it’s so exciting to hear you’re getting into marlowe! ☺️ faustus and hero and leander were a great place to start. early modern english is difficult to read when you’re not used to it so congrats on getting this far! i promise it gets easier with practice.

my answer has turned out quite long so i'm going to put it under a keep reading to avoid clogging my follower's dashboards, you can just click "keep reading" to expand the post to see it.

in terms of a reading order going forward, i’d suggest you continue on with edward ii, then if you want to keep going you can go to the jew of malta and tamburlaine. edward ii is up there with faustus in terms of how often it gets read, so there will be more information online if you get stuck.

my best advice is to start with reading a summary of the play, preferably act by act, before reading the actual play. it does mean you’ll be spoiling yourself but doing this was so useful for me when i was getting used to reading early modern plays because you already have the base understanding of the plot which takes away the stress of having to figure that out on top of the difficult language. wikipedia often has good summaries, or you can use a site like sparknotes or litcharts if you find wikipedia isn't helpful enough. the easiest way to find them is to just look up "(play title) summary" and find one that helps you.

unlike shakespeare there sadly aren’t many productions of marlowe’s work available to watch online, or else i’d suggest that too. (if you want to get into shakespeare that's also a good tactic for reading his work.)

now for your question about annotated editions, i can offer you two suggestions based on my personal experience. these are the only two academic editions of marlowe's plays that i have read.

1. new mermaids: i was assigned the christopher marlowe four plays edition for my british literature 1 class when i was first reading marlowe and i found the footnotes helpful. they have also published individual editions of each play. i am confident in this one's academic legitimacy since my professor chose to assign it to us for class. if you can get your hands on this one i'd recommend it.

2. oxford english drama: i used this edition to write my undergraduate thesis on edward ii and found the annotations to also be useful, but unlike the mermaid editions this one has endnotes which means you'll have to be flipping back and forth to read the notes. (that might sound weirdly specific but i have a grudge against endnotes... they're so annoying) but it is still a great edition and i bought this one in person at barnes and noble so it might be easier to find (but don't quote me on that).

in terms of background information i could turn this post into a novel getting into that for you. if you have any specific question about marlowe or early modern england generally shoot them at me. beyond that, the introduction to most academic editions like the ones i suggested should have helpful context that will help with reading.

enjoy!

#lynnemints #christopher marlowe #long post #marlowe #freddie.txt

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jordanincambodia · 1 year ago

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Eagle has landed!

Sua-sdei (hello)! Traveling to Cambodia, or Kampuchea, as Khmer people call it, has been a wild ride- and not just because of the terrifying lack of regard for stop signs in Phnom Penh. Neither has it been due to the street food, buzzing mosquitoes, or even the raging thunderstorms that faithfully show up every day around 5 pm (The words "Is that hail?" excitedly left the mouth of my fellow intern Brendan as we heard our first rain. Nah Brendan, it's just rain).

The flight from LAX to Incheon to Phnom Penh airport, while smooth, left Brendan and I rather tired, but life was not done with us yet. Upon being picked up from the airport by our EMI contact, Josiah, our car ran out of gas at a red stoplight (the one time anyone in a vehicle followed the rules that night), so Josiah and I walked several kilometers to fill plastic bottles with red gasoline, also riding a tuk-tuk somewhere during the journey. After two trips to the gas station, the car started up, and we headed off to our home in the Sensok district.

Orientation lasted from June 21 to last Monday, and while a whirlwind, I learned many great things about EMI and Cambodia. Aside from great topics like good missions practices, Khmer culture, and EMI project cycle, we learned about why EMI exists, how it has improved, and what our goals are. The office is already beginning to feel like a family, since we do devotions every morning, eat lunch, and do some late afternoon activities together.

I've also reached greeting-level of proficiency in Khmer (pronounced kmai), which I would consider level negative one. English letters don't quite do the Khmer consonants and vowels correctly, and I've found I don't need to tell many jokes here, because if I want to be funny, I just start speaking Khmer. That said, I'm getting plenty of encouragement to continue my studies and may even be conversation-capable by August, if I keep working at it.

For those of you that have made it this far, I'd like to mention that I have been working too. The first project that I have been assigned work for is the Hope International School traffic project. Basically, the school has crazy traffic during pickup times and has requested EMI design the pickup area to minimize congestion. I had the easy first task of dimensioning traffic design plans to prepare it for construction. I also successfully made my first site water demand estimate for YWAM Pailin yesterday using a wonderful Excel spreadsheet; In English, I figured out how much water and wastewater a site might use if it was built. My supervising engineer is hoping to push me towards WASH work, but I'm definitely open to any kind of work the office needs done.

There is so much more that I want to write about, but I'll have to cut it short so I can study Khmer and hopeeefully stop making people laugh with it. Thank you for reading and keeping up with my Cambodia trip. Juub knea pel kraoy (see you later)!

Jord

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a-moth-to-the-light · 2 years ago

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Language Learning Challenge, Days 3-6

So I haven't done like anything for this challenge in the past few days (other than sing along to Tini songs a whole bunch--and that's more daily routine than anything, so I don't think it really counts). Hopefully I'll be able to rally over the next few weeks and do some more practice, but I'm trying to go easy on myself right now. After all, building habits is tough and all that! sighs, sleepy

3: Are there any apps you use to learn languages?

Spotify may not be intended for language learning, but, at least when it comes to Spanish, there's a whole lot of media (like music & podcasts!) on the app to practice with. Same situation for Netflix (so many shows have Spanish sub/dub!) and also for Webtoon--on Webtoon, if you change your content language to Spanish, there's less of a selection, I think, but still plenty to read! And there are other content languages available for folks who are learning others :)

4: How do you improve your listening skills?

Listening is my least favorite skill--speaking is a close second, though--because I have issues with processing audio in any language. However, if I listen to songs enough times (which of course I do, as I pretty much live off of Spotify), I start to pick out words & string sentences together. Since I listen to so much music in Spanish anyway, it's pretty good practice for me! I’m basically sneaking listening practice into my music time like vegetables into dessert. JENESAISPOP also has a podcast on Spotify called Revelación o Timo, and I've used that one as part of Spanish homework assignments a couple of times! I'll probably try to get back into it this month :)

5: How do you improve or practice your speaking skills?

I'm SO awkward about speaking in Spanish, but it's way easier when I talk to myself--luckily, I do that all the time, too. So I'll just have myself switch my English babbling over to Spanish (or Spanish with random English words thrown in when I don't feel like putting in the mental effort to practice circumlocution).

A side note: circumlocution is great for language practice! We learned about it in one of my classes, and the idea is basically that you describe or "talk around" a word you don't know in a language that's new to you. It's sort of like charades? I’ve found it really helps with practicing vocabulary, along with developing communication skills in a new language.

6: Are there any free online sources you use to learn languages?

JeneSaisPop (the content is in Spanish I swear!!), MondoSonoro, and IndieHoy are three sites with content in Spanish that I love keeping up with! I already enjoy music reviews in English, and these are sites that teach me new words & phrases in Spanish (and introduce me to new Spanish-language music!) as a bonus :) I follow Indiehoy on Instagram, too, so I end up microdosing on Spanish practice whenever I scroll through my feed!

SpanishDict is my go-to site for learning new words and finding the words I'm looking for when I'm working in Spanish--they have really detailed definitions that are super helpful for understanding unique, uncommon uses of words, though they don't always account for slang terms.

Today's Practice

Since I've been listening to "Pronto" by Repion nonstop like the edgyboy I am, I'll try to work on learning the lyrics over the next few days :) That chorus would be really fun for karaoke!

Word/Phrase of the Day

la pared -- wall

La mesa está contra la pared.

#languagelearningwithlunlun #learning spanish

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anglerflsh · 2 years ago

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ayy saw your last post, any good sites for reading up on witchhunting practices and/ or the 1600s? it seems really neat! also feel free to infodump here, i love your!! little rambly-posts theyre so fun :D

oh i would list a bibliography here but I'm just going to recommend going on a wikipedia dive, especially the reference links at the bottom of articles! Also "the 1600s" is very vague but I'm assuming you mean in colonial america and not like the thirty years war or something so, for that my source was Italian Historian Alessandro Barbero but his documentaries are you know. In Italian.

I don't have the time to infodump here but I have share my top three fun facts about this: One, the reason why moles were considered witch's marks was because it was believed that witches fed their familiars their own blood, and those spots where scars from that (which is also why they checked if it bled. When it didn't it was because all the blood had already been sucked dry from the familiar) Two, the entire story about Salem started form the eleven-something year old daughters of the town preacher accusing their house slave of tormenting them in the night. That slave, called Tituba, confessed to having "signed satan's book" and also offered to name every other witch in the place, and about 19 people got arrested and hanged despite them never confessing Three, one of the tests was also the practice of making a supposed witch recite the padre nostro (i think in english it's the "our father who art in heaven" one) without a single mistake. I think this one is fun because my elementary school did that too with me and my then-classmates!

+bonus fact in my region of italy witches are called Strie or Masce and they're generally believed to have shapeshifting powers. And apparently my great-grandfather on my grandmother's side participated in hunts against them? Allegedly, because my mother told me but she's not that reliable

#[.asks]#anonymous #the entire story of salem is so culturally interesting I'm obsessed #anyways I'm kind of sleep deprived so this /is/ very much a ramble I'm just obsessed by it <3

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atalho-s · 3 years ago

Text

Light Up The Dark

Part 2 | We are accidents waiting to happen

pairing: bartender!tom x famous!reader

warnings: smut +18 miniors dni, swear words?, drinking, let me know if anything else!

words: 5.0 k

a/n: english it’s not my first language, so i’m sorry for any mistake! I don’t have a taglist yet, but if you want to be tagged in the next chapters let me know!!

PART 2 if you want to read part 1 click here!

It was already Saturday. The day Y/n took for herself. Writing was extraordinary, but she loved having a day off to take care of herself. She spent the day doing things she enjoyed, whether it was lying in bed watching a movie or trying to cook something.

After the fateful day of writer's block she started writing like crazy, so she didn't feel guilty about taking a day off without thinking about her characters and how they would get out of the challenges she had created for them.

The fateful day. For some reason she kept thinking about that damned Brit with that accent. For a moment she'd been scared that she'd been seen by paparazzi hanging out with the mysterious bartender, or even some picture of him leaving her apartment. But nothing came out in the news on the gossip sites, which made her relieved.

As much as she deserved to have fun once in a while and wasn't doing anything wrong, she still didn't want to bring attention to herself and even less to a guy who wasn't even famous. She was afraid to put anyone who wasn't famous in the media. Fear that one day suddenly, this person might be persecuted because of her.

Anyway, it had just been a crazy night. Nothing much. And she didn't intend to see him again. So she had nothing to worry about.

Sitting down in the kitchen counter with her familiar cup of coffee she got lost in some thoughts. Why hadn't she stopped thinking about him ever since? It had been a great night, but that was all. She didn't even know him well.

Maybe it was because her creative block had been broken after being with him. But obviously it was just a coincidence. She had just felt inspired after a distraction.

She shook his head away from the thoughts and placed the cup in the sink. She took a deep breath and thought about what to do next. But before she could think of anything else her cell phone started ringing on the counter. She was almost jump by the sudden sound, seeing the screen indicating that it was Milla, her agent, who had become one of her best friends.

- Hi Mil! - she said after sliding the screen.

- Good morning baby. - she said on the other end of the line. - Ready for the party?

- Party? What a party? - Y/n asked confused starting to wash the small amount ofdishes she had soiled.

- How you don't know? I thought I sent you the invitation on your email and I even sent you a message!

- Bestie, I haven't seen my email or message for days. I was super focused on the book, my writer's block finally went away.

- Really? I knew that would go away! You were worried for nothing. What did you do to go back to writing? - Milla asked and Y/n smiled a little.

- Well... I just went out to chill out a bit...Nothing much.

- Y/n getting out on weekdays? And even on the days you're writing a book? That's what I call grow. - she said and Y/n rolled her eyes laughing. - I'm even afraid to invite you to parties, because I know when you're writing you hate to go out... But it's good to know that you're getting out of your routine a little...

- Yeah, sometimes it's good to breathe new air. - Y/n replied drying his hands on a towel. - But what party are you talking about?

- A party of none other than Emma Brown. - Y/n snorted. Emma Brown was a great actress who to tell the truth she didn't know much, she only knew her from a couple of her movies, but other than that she didn't know much about her.

But what she did know was that she had some also famous friends of questionable taste. They were those famous people who only knew about money, women, cars and mansions. But she was tipped for a theatrical adaptation of one of her books and she wanted everything to come out perfect. She was very afraid the movie would end up ruining her work.

- Do I really have to go? - She asked in a tearful voice.

- Yes you have! It's going to be a really fancy birthday party for her, all the famous people in the industry are going to be there. You know you have to socialize with these people. Who knows, you can make some important friendships...

- Milla... I don't know... I don't need important friendships. I don't need anyone to stand up or approach others for interest.

- I know you don't need anyone for that... I just meant that you're very isolated, you need to make connections, understand? I know it's hard because you hate all that fame and stuff. But if you want the adaptation of your story to be good, there's no way... Besides, one of the great directors you left me on the list to research will be there too. So it would be really cool to kill two birds with one stone. - Milla said and Y/n sighed. She was right, if she wanted everything to work out she had to at least have a conversation with these people. It would be weird to refuse Emma's invitation to her birthday. It would just show that she was uninterested.

- Okay... You won ok? - She said and Milla gave an excited squeal. - But I won't stay long!

- Okay, okay... Just for you to go is great! Andrew will be there shortly for you to choose a dress. -Andrew was her stylist and she practically jumped every time Y/n had an important event, because it was rare for her to go. Good thing he didn't just have her as a client, because otherwise he'd be bored out of his mind for a long time.

- Okay Mil, thank you... I love you! - She said and Milla said goodbye hanging up the phone.

It was late afternoon when Andrew arrived at her apartment with several suitcases and bags in both hands. He really had brought up thousands of options. But Y/n ended up choosing a slightly shiny black dress that went just above the knee with a V-neck. Something cute, but nothing too fancy.

He did her makeup. Which wasn't too heavy either, as she hated things that were too heavy on her face. Finally she put on a mid-heeled sandal in the same color as the dress and her sparkly earrings. Before Andrew left her apartment satisfied with the result.

It was almost 7:30 pm when a black car that would take her to the party location arrived in front of her building and she got out enter the backseat right after. She was apprehensive. She hated socializing to tell the truth. Large crowds and cameras really made her anxious.

After almost 20 minutes the car stopped in front of what appeared to be a large gate. Several paparazzi showed up and started taking pictures of her car surrounding her or even tapping on the window a little, asking her if she could talk to them. Which she obviously ignored. The driver introduced himself to the doorman and he opened the gate letting the car pass and stop in front of a luxurious mansion.

Some people were coming in and others were standing in front talking. She saw that there were some familiar faces of the media. Actresses, actors, singers, famous people of every imaginable type.

She opened the car door and walked out towards the large entrance. She smiled at a few people, nodding her head as she passed and found herself in a crowd of people as she entered the place. There really were a lot of people, despite the place being even bigger inside. Many with fancy drinks in hand and chatting. A song playing on the background.

She walked deeper into the room and took a quick look around trying to find the birthday girl. After a few minutes she found her near one of the sofas. Y/n walked over and stopped beside her, causing Emma to stop her conversation with two more people and look at her.

- Happy Birthday! - Y/n said in the friendliest way possible and Emma smirked and hugged her lightly afterwards.

- Thank you! Glad you came! - she said, breaking out of the hug after a few seconds.

- Your party is very beautiful, I loved the decoration. - Y/n said looking around. Indeed Emma had decorated the place in a simple way, but at the same time fancy and beautiful.

- Oh thank you... - she said, still smiling. - I'm very happy that you accepted my invitation, we have a lot to talk about since maybe we'll work together, right?

- No problem, obviously I would come... - Y/n said and almost punched herself because she was very fake in saying that. - But we really have to talk!

- Well, I was talking to Jim just now... I can give you his number later... He's a great director and I think it would be great for your adaptation... - Emma said and Y/n thought that she was really interested in that adaptation, because she was even talking to the possible renowned director, which surprised her. She thought Emma was a little more oblivious to her books and even movie stuff. She thought she was one of those famous actresses who expected others to come after her, not being interested in the work itself, but only on the fame and money. - We love your book! I think it has great potential for a grand adaptation.

- Wow, that is good to hear! Thanks a lot! - Y/n said sincerely this time. - I'll love talking to him too...

- Sure! - She looked behind Y/n and motioned to someone from far away. - Hey Jim! You can come here? - She asked speaking loudly for him to hear and Y/n turned around watching the director approaching after saying goodbye to someone. He wasn't much older than she thought, maybe in his early thirties, he wore a small beard that fit his face and short hair, but with curls that jutted out around his head. -That's Y/n... Y/n that's Jim...-Emma said when he got in front of her and Jim held out his hand with a smile.

- Nice to meet Y/n, we finally met... - he said and Y/n shook his hand also smiling.

- Nice to meet you Jim! - She said and Emma sat in one of the armchairs indicating for the two to sit, which they did next.

- Do you two want something to drink? Champagne?- Emma asked and they both accepted as she motioned for someone from far away to bring them.

- Well, I found your book very intriguing Y/n... I can say I haven't slept for a while... - Jim said laughing a little and Y/n smiled. - It's a very well written story, I loved the plots and it has a great resolution. I think I would make a good 2 hour movie with all this material... - he said and Y/n paid attention until something took her a little out of focus. Something not. Somebody.

It was the waiter, and not just any waiter. It was Tom. He came into her vision and she couldn't believe what she was seeing. Maybe it was a mirage or she was mistaking him for someone else. But when he approached she was sure it was him. He came with a tray with drinks in one hand. He was wering a white dress shirt, with black pants. The typical pattern of a fancy party waiter. But he was beautiful. Y/n felt a shiver for a moment and tried to hide it by looking back at Jim who was still talking about his plans for the possible movie.

Maybe Tom didn't even remember her. She was just a one-night stand, he should do that with a lot of girls out there, so it wasn't something new to him. As soon as he arrived, he handed one of the glasses to Emma beside her and Y/n felt her breath quicken a little. She didn't know why she was so nervous. It was just a waiter she had slept with a few days ago.

- Excuse me... - he said and Y/n looked up at him quickly seeing that he was right in front of him. -Here it is miss...-he said looking her in the eyes and then winking at her, wich almost make her shrink in her chair. He held out the tray for her to take one of the glasses and she did, looking away at Jim.

- So, what do you think? - Jim asked taking the glass from the tray and Y/n took a sip of his surprise drink.

- Sorry? - She asked guiltily for having been distracted.

- About us meeting and having a meeting next week? That way I can show you my idea better. - he said and Y/n smiled.

- Of course, that would be great! - she said and Tom walked away not looking in her direction again, which left her disappointed for a second. She would going to love looking into those eyes again.

- Perfect! - Jim replied excitedly and started talking about other things as well as Emma.

They talked for almost an hour, until Emma went to talk to other people and Jim said he was leaving as he had some work in the morning. Y/n sat for a while and finished drinking the last of her champagne and placed it on the table in front of her.

She thought about leaving. She had already done the important interactions for the night. So, she had no reason to stay there. But she kept thinking about the damn waiter. Would it be weird to go talk to him? Maybe just say hi? But she doubted he would want to talk to her. Besides, he was working. She didn't want to get in his way.

Getting up from her chair and straightening her dress, she forced her steps towards the exit, but stopped midway as she saw Tom walking into what appeared to be the kitchen with the tray tucked under his arm. She looked at the exit door and sighed. Okay, if she went to him just to say hi, it wouldn't hurt would it?

Y/n turned and headed in the direction that Tom had gone. She couldn't even believe she was doing it this. She would looked ridiculous in his eyes. But she choose to ignore the little voice of reason again. Passing by a few people, and walking out into a empty hallway, she opening a single door at end. She closed in behind her and turned to see that Tom was on his back piling some boxes in a corner. His muscles in that outfit made her feel tempted somehow, so she swallowed hard. He turned at the sound of the door closing and looked at her with a mixture of confusion and curiosity.

- Looking for something madam? - He asked with a smirk.

- Actually... - Y/n thought of some excuse, maybe it would be better, so it would seem that she was there for something else and not for him. - Yeah... I was looking for the bathroom, I think I take the wrong direction...

- Yeah...Actually, the bathroom is on the other side of the hallway... - he said leaning against the kitchen counter and looking her up and down, making her feel completely vulnerable. After his eyes roamed her legs and bust, they came to her face and he grinned.

- Okay, I'll... - Y/n started saying and turned around taking a few steps. But she stopped midway, closing his eyes, tearing himself apart from the inside out of embarrassment. She turned around again seeing that he was still watching her, now with his arms crossed over his chest, wondering what she would do next. - You remember me don't you? - She asked fearfully.

- Of course I remember darling... - he said, practically intensifying his accent in that nickname that was so perfect in his voice. Y/n took a few steps forward also crossing her arms. - How could I forget the famous writer Y/n?- He raised an eyebrow and she rolled her eyes with his last sentence.

- It really was an...- She looked at her feet trying to find a word. - Interesting night… - she finally said and he chuckled, making her look up.

- Very interesting indeed... - he said putting his hands in his front pockets, pulling himself away from the counter and heading towards her. Y/n wanted to say goodbye and leave, run away as fast as possible. But she couldn't, every move he did was too tempting, so she just stood there watching him get closer and closer to her. He stopped in front of her and looked into her eyes, smiling slightly.

- What are you doing here? Do you work as a waiter at parties too? - Y/n asked curiously.

- My boss sometimes receives proposals for us to work at these rich parties... - he said with a shrug.

- Oh... Nice... - she said crossing her arms. - Well...Now I really have to go... - she said trying to get away from it one last time.

- Why did you really come here love? -Tom asked tilting his head a little to the side and she felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

- I told you, I was looking for the bathroom. -Y/n looked at his face trying to be firm, but saw that he still wore that smirk. Why did he have to be so confident like that?

- Oh sure... Just like you also looked for some excuse that day for me to leave, but failed miserably?- he asked making a thoughtful face and she still hadn't decided if she wanted to slap him or kiss him.

- Why did you leave without saying goodbye tho? - She asked ignoring what he had said.

- So that's why you came after me? Are you hurt that I didn't leave you a goodbye kiss? - he said pouting.

- Of course not, I just... I don't know, it would be nice to say that you were leaving and that you wouldn't stay for breakfast... - Y/n said looking to the side, avoiding those brown eyes that intimidated her.

- Darling, I'm not that type guy, sorry...

- What type of guy? - she still avoided looking at him.

- The type who stay for breakfeast. -he said taking a hand from her pocket and taking her chin gently, making her look at him. - But if you want some fun I'm at your disposal. -he said and she bit her lower lip lightly making him deviate his eyes towards her lips. - Do you want darling?- he asked quietly and Y/n seemed to be transfixed by her touch. She was surrendered, she couldn't deny it. Maybe even hypnotized.

- I...- she said with a little shaky voice. - I don't know...

- Yes or no?- he asked looking from her lips to her eyes and she felt her breath getting heavy.

- Yes...- she just spoke as a whisper and he smiled satisfied.

- How about you meet me in 15 minutes in the bathroom of the pool house? - He said and she just shook her head slowly. Tom released her chin and backed away slowly, not taking his eyes off her, and then walked away leaving her alone with her heart racing.

Y/n took a deep breath and tried to place herself in what had just happened. Did she really want this? Her mind could try to hear the voice of reason, but it was drowned out by her body's reaction. She wanted to feel him again.

She walked away quickly, passing several people who were talking loudly or who were already drunk. She looked around and saw the door that led to the back side and sneak there, getting out and feeling the slightly chilly night air, closing the sliding door behind her.

She saw the pool that had some people around it and a little further to the right a door that opened into another closed space. Probably the pool house. She walked over there, trying to hide it so no one would see her, and went inside. She closed the front door slowly and headed towards the bathroom.

The place was dark, with only the lights outside. So she was holding her hand into to some stuff until he found the door. She went in and turned on the light. The bathroom was spacious, with a large sink and a huge mirror in front of it. She closed herself off and looked at herself in the reflection.

That was crazy. She had never done that at parties. Not even when she was drunk. And now she was there, looking forward to what might happen. In fact she knew what was going to happen, just as she knew when she invited him up to her apartment that night. But even so, she felt butterflies in her stomach in anticipation.

After almost 10 minutes of waiting she heard the bathroom door open and she turned in the direction, feeling extremely anxious. Tom came in looking over his shoulder and closed the door soon after, looking at her with an opening grin. He locked the door slowly with one hand and came towards her in a hurry.

The next thing she felt was his lips pressing against hers urgently. He kissed her like it was the last thing he would do. Running her tongue over her lips asking permission and Y/n opened it slowly letting him explore her mouth with his burning tongue.

She ran her hand around the back of his neck pulling his hair and he responded by holding her waist tightly. Tom walked forward and she leaned her back against the sink counter. Making him lift her with agility, sitting her down on the cold surface and getting between her legs. She grunted in surprise against his mouth and he broke the kiss for air. Kissing from her neck to her collarbone and she closed her eyes feeling his touch.

- Tom... - she said in a low voice. - You won't get in trouble if you disappear like that? -he now kissed her neckline and squeezed her thigh with desire.

- Not if we're fast darling. -He spoke a bit husky, moving his kisses to her earlobe, biting lightly and she moaned low. - And despite loving your sounds, you will have to be silent. - He looked at her smiling maliciously. - Promise? -He spoke touching her nose with his lightly, looking at her closely, and she nodded making him attack her lips next.

Still kissing her he pulled the hem of her dress up a little and she bit his lip making him smile against the kiss. Her fingers reached her inner thigh and then moved up to her panties. Tom put the fabric aside with one of her fingers and passed one slowly at her entrance feeling her wetness.

- Always ready for me aren't you darling? -He said pulling his mouth away from hers, staying just a few centimeters away from her. She moaned softly again and he smiled as he pulled her fingers away and replaced them around her thighs pulling her closer to the edge of the sink. He started to finger her really slowly and she bite her lips, trying to control her moaning. Tom keep his pace just watching her face squirm with pleasure. After seconds he removed his delicious fingers making her almost protest out loud, makind him smile even more. If wasn't for the rush he would definitively make his time with you.

Y/n then put his hands on the collar of his shirt and opened the first buttons. Kissing his neck with desire, making him squeeze her thighs in response. Biting her lips he unfastened his belt and then the buttons of his pants pulled them down along with his boxers, revealing his cock. He pulled her in for one more kiss before taking the condom package from his pocket and opening it, meanwhile Y/n was kissing uncovered place she could reach, from his face to his chest, opening more buttons of his shirt.

Tom adjusted the condom on his cock before taking a few thrusts. He moved even closer to her, if that was even possible, and gave her a peck.

- Ready? He spoke softly against her lips and she nodded almost in despair, wanting to feel him inside her more than anything.

He smiled once more and slid his cock easily as she was completely wet. Tom growled low against her ear and Y/n bit her lip so no sound could come out. He started to move, after she was more adjusted to his size, at first slowly and starting to increase his pace with each second.

-Fuck... - he cursed softly against her ear and she pulled the hair from his neck with one hand, while the other squeezed his shoulder. The more he increased the pace she felt as if she were coming off the ground. - So tight darling... - he said between small grunts. - Feels so good...

- Tom... - Y/n spoke and he increased the pace even more making her moan with the sudden sensation of pleasure and he muffled her sounds by sticking his lips on hers.

-Shh… - he said after moving his lips from hers and Y/n tried her best to keep the sounds to herself, but he filled her perfectly and made her feel so good that she couldn't help it. Tom smirked and put his hand over her mouth, covering her moans. - Can't contain yourself? -he said and kissed her neck giving light bites and hickeys. -You're so easy for me, love... Look at you...- he spoke in a low voice, while still holding his hand firm in her mouth and kissing below her ear. - So easy...- he said going faster, as if it were possible, and bit his lower lip trying to contain his own moans this time, touching his nose to her cheek.

- Please…- she managed to speak muffled against his hand, feeling her orgasm quickly building.

- I know sweetheart... - he said making her feel his heavy breath into her cheek. -I got you ...-he finally said and that was enough for her orgasm to release with force, making him also come right after her with one last muffled grunt against her neck. He continued to move slowly for a few more seconds, before coming to a complete stop. The two of them with their breaths out of control. Reaching their high.

After a few minutes Tom took his hand from her mouth and soon after took his member out of her slowly. The two were silent the entire time. Y/n felt empty as soonTom walked away to clean up, still half dazed from all the pleasure she just felt. He cleaned himself up and discarded the condom, zipping his pants and turned around, buttoning his shirt right away. Y/n didn't take her eyes off every move he made and he smiled approaching her.

- Want some help darling? - he asked standing in front of her and she held in his arms before he helped her getting down from the sink. She felt a little dizzy and if it wasn't for him holding her she thought she would fall. - You're right? - he asked still holding her on her waist.

- Yes...Thank you... - she managed to say.

- Well, I have to go, before they notice that I'm gone... - he said, releasing her.

- Of course... - Y/n said. - Tom… - she didn't know what to say. It might be the second time they'd done this, but it still felt like it was the first and she felt somewhat embarrassed. Maybe because she wasn't used to casual sex.

- See you soon? - He said giving a quick kiss on her cheek, fixing his hair in the best way he could and winking as he walked away, going to the door and unlocking it. He got out and closed it behind him while she back staring into the mirror.

She took a deep breath and was trying to figure out what to do next. After cleaning her up she finally got out of there. She crawled to the door and managed to get through the party without the weird looks she thought everyone would send to her when they bumped into her. For some reason she thought everyone would know, but obviously not. She felt weird doing that at an party, it really wasn't like her. But why did she feel so good?

She looked around before heading out of the house, but she didn't find Tom in her vision and she didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. She wanted to look at him one last time from afar, but at the same time she didn't. Maybe that was the last time they were going to do that. She didn't think she'd find him like this anywhere else, and she didn't intend to go to the bar he worked at just to get another night with him. Besides, that's what she was, just one night, just a "quickie" in the bathroom. And everything was fine. He was that for her too, so what did it matter?

For a moment she felt his head fill with ideas. Y/n had a perfect plot for her story now. She had to go home and get back to writing right away. Calling the driver from a distance, she practically ran towards the car.

#tom holland #tom holland smut #tom holland x reader #tom holland x y/n #bartender!tom #bartender!tom x writer!reader #waiter!tom #waiter!tom x reader #bartender!tom x reader #bartender!tom x famous!reader #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland angst #tom holland imagine #tom holland series #tom holland x you #tom holland x famous!reader

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hotchley · 3 years ago

Note

hey sumayyah! just an update:

firstly oh gosh i just realized i missed the reply from 🐝 anon (regarding the kpop song recs?) AND IT'S BEEN SO LONG so to 🐝 anon: i apologize!!!!! but i have just seen your reply!! and yes i will check them out, thank you so much 🥰🥰

secondly: i got the vaccine jab! the actual injection itself didn't really hurt but i still don't like injections lmao. but yeah your arm gets really sore and achy after a few hours, and especially the next day. other than that, i was relatively lucky in the sense i didn't really experience any more side effects (yet, maybe)? like i had a mini, really short headache the next day, and that's it i think (i didn't measure my temperature so no way of knowing if i ever had a fever, maybe I'll do it later, just to check & be safe)

lastly! the literature essay was on Hamlet! we're doing a few texts for my English Literature class (I'm doing (Cambridge) A levels E-Lit), and the texts include The Great Gatsby, Hamlet and The Caretaker (there's 2 other set texts too but I've forgotten their names oops) — we've gone through & (kinda) finished Gatsby & Hamlet, and we're starting The Caretaker next term. the essay was supposed to be practice for the upcoming test & we could choose any question we wanted to write on (there was a supplied list) & the question I chose was to talk about how the characters in Hamlet concealed and revealed their differing state of mind! quite interesting to consider but also lowkey very frustating because unpopular opinion: i don't actually like Hamlet that much & much prefer Gatsby instead 🥴 all my friends insist I have issues and keep telling me that Hamlet >>>> Gatsby and I appreciate Shakespeare really, but Hamlet is just.... Not Vibing ™ with me 😭 even when we did Macbeth last year I had a much easier & better time but really Hamlet is Not It i guess.

okay oops that turned out into a really long rant hahaha, i just wanted to check in! & tbh I'm fine with going off anon but I'm just a little shy because my blog is NOTHING compared to yours 😳🥺 (you might see me in your notifs sometimes 🥴) but I'll type out the hc slash small drabble i wrote soon! (it's currently 4am here where i am and i need to get back to sleep soon LOL) i hope you're doing well, sending lots of love and hugs! take care of yourself & here's your daily reminder to stay hydrated now!! 🥰❤️❤️

- 🌙

YAY! You have recommendations!!

Oh okay :) I haven't had either dose yet because it's not being offered to my age group, but only my mum and sister were properly unwell after so...

I've never read Hamlet. Probably never will, so I can't comment... I have lots of unpopular book opinions, one of which is: I didn't like The Great Gatsby. I feel like I was missing part of the context, but I just didn't vibe with it....

Oh I actually did enjoy Macbeth!! I did it as part of my English Lit course, and it wasn't bad... I saw a production of it too, which was cool :) I also got dubbed Lady Macbeth, because I was softly-spoken and seemingly very sweet, but in things like debate I won't hold back... so yeah

You can't compare your blog to others!! Some of the people I follow are Very Cool and Very Popular, but at the end of the day, we're all just people putting a little piece of ourselves on a site most people think of as dead so...

OH YES!! GO TO SLEEP!!

Aww thank you... and yeah I should probably do the hydration...

#🌙anon #people talk to me

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realmeisstuff · 4 years ago

Text

The Craziest Thing I Did For Seventeen

I like planning things.

Ever since Ideal Cut and missing the chance to see them in 2018, I've been thinking of ways to fulfill my fangirl dreams without sacrificing my responsibility as a daughter and sister, and also my goals as a nurse.

Working in a private hospital doesn't give you lots of extra money for fangirling. My regular salary could only cover my daily expenses plus contributions for my family needs, so I could only save for my most awaited unannounced Seventeen concert by doing overtime, not using my holiday pay and saving my night differentials, plus super tight budgeting.

It took two years for them to finally announce "Ode to You" world tour. And this time, I'm planning on turning my plans into action.

But before that, I had to find ways to ensure that everything would go smoothly: first, is to arrange my schedule, second is to prove my parents that Seventeen is my drive towards success and not a distraction (because it it necessary for me to get their approval and I don't want them to think that I'm choosing Seventeen over practicality), and three, take my sister with me, because she's the reason why I saw them in the first place, now it's my turn to bring her to them. It's about time that I return the favor by chasing our happiness together.

Maktub.

The first one was resolved probably due to luck that I never knew I had.

Since I've already become a regular employee, I was entitled for an annual vacation, but my schedule was December 2019, while the concert was set on February 2020. I went to my nursing manager and asked if my vacation could be moved to February, but she said that it wouldn't be possible, since the date is fixed. But when she tried to check the schedule in the HR, conflict arised since 4 of us in the ICU department, have the same schedule, and due to under staffing, they needed to arrange it. I volunteered for my schedule to be moved to a later date and so February 1-15 was given to me as my vacation leave.

Lucky, right?

In my excitement, I already booked for the flight and hotel, a crazy impulsive decision that could only be paired with prayers, in hope that it would go the way I plan it to. (But in my defense I had to do it, because it's much cheaper if you booked it earlier than later)

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The second one was a challenge. How could I convince my parents that I know what to prioritize and that choosing Seventeen isn't impractical? The only answer I could find was to take the english proficiency exam that I was supposed to take 2 years ago, but doesn't have the guts to do it. I've already saved for the exam, but I always come up with excuses (or actually somewhat true) that I don't have time to study due to my work schedule.

But this time for Seventeen (and my nursing career), I'm willing to take a chance (although my non-risk taker self is shaking with anxiety).

It was late in November when I decided to book my exam, I was hoping to take it by December, but maybe God knows I'm still not prepared since I haven't studied intensively yet, that there was a conflict of schedule. My coworker already booked December, and since we're on the same shift, we must not be on leave at the same time. So, I booked the next available schedule, which is January, at least I still have a month to study for the test.

During night shifts, if I don't have anyhing to do, I would practice my writing, then on weekends I would practice my reading and listening. Everyday after duty, I would only sleep for about 6-7 hours, so that I could wake up then practice my speaking for 1-2 hours before my next shift.

Four days before my exam, I had to ask permission to be on leave, so that I could camp out at the site and buy my desired ticket. I had to study while waiting in line. Despite the long hours of waiting, I am determined and excited to finally buy my concert tickets. It also helped that Carats surrounded me, and I felt that I've really found my place. We met our mutuals, and chatted with our co-fans. It was a very memorable moment for me.

January 16,2020. Boo Seungkwan's Birthday and also the day of the exam. I was so nervous, and to calm my nerves, I silently prayed to God for guidance, I joked that "God if only the examiner would ask me about my favorite music, I would be sure that I could pass this exam, because I could talk about Seventeen all day". In my surprise, it was the first question for the first part of the exam. And that's when I knew that where God guides, he provides.

I believe that the universe is conspiring to help me achieve what I truly wanted the most. I passed the test with flying colors, and it helped me gain the approval of my mom to go to the concert.

But then 2020 strikes, and it seems that the pandora box was opened. Health threats due to the covid virus was rising, and everyone was worried that it would reach the country.

I knew the gravity of the situation, but I couldn't stop myself from wanting to go to the concert despite the fear. I started becoming desperate when most of the events were cancelled due to the pandemic.

I held onto that hope that God didn't let me achieve everything I did so far, just to break my heart. I already have the concert and plane tickets, and the hotel was already paid, but on top of all that, I didn't want to disappoint my sister, who wanted this so badly like I do, because after long years of waiting, she could finally have a chance to go home to Manila. Also, my friend, who has never been in any concerts (despite wanting to go), finally took the courage to do this for herself.

When Running Man announced the cancellation of their concert, which is one day after OTY. I couldn't help but cry. I feel like my world is falling apart. Without the fangirl side of me, I would just be my pessimistic, melancholic self who doesn't know how to have fun.

As if that's not bad news enough, due to the massive resignation in the Icu department, they had to rotate the ward staffs and place them in our department, and when they announced the name of the "new" Icu staffs, it feels like I've been struck by a lightning.

In my two years of working, I only had a conflict with two nurses from different departments: The girl who spread rumors about me and the senior nurse from my previous area who traumatized me during my junior days. So, how shocking was it that the newbies would be the both of them? I almost resigned right there and then.

But it only made my desire to go to the concert much stronger, because the only thing that could push me to work even in the most stressful environment with the most difficult co-workers would be Seventeen.

I felt so down as the days went nearer to the concert date. I felt that anytime they would announce the cancellation of the event, and I had to cancel everything I booked as well.

I wanted to tell myself that safety first, but the other side of me wanted to see them so badly...desperate even to risk and live presently without fear. I debated in my head that I would die faster working in the hospital rather than to a one-day concert.

I prayed to the Gods, even done some bargaining, so that we would all be safe to go to the concert. I would rather have toxic shifts with my toxic co-workers than to miss this concert. I was that desperate.

But Inang announced that the concert would push through.

*Insert happy tears and fangirl squeals*

I made the necessary preparations, so that I would ensure our safety. We brought n95 and surgical mask with us plus we take 1000 mg vitamin c everyday.

We encountered problems along the way such as the hotel canceling our reservation, even though I've already paid the downpayment, and heavy rains while searching for the hotel, but we made it.

We were able to sort out the problems, and enjoyed the day before the concert. We did some pilgrimage and went to Saem store where they did their fansigning event. We also stopped by their hotel, but just to look at the place.

On the day of the concert, we went inside the arena early, and was able to join the Carat activities. It was exhilarating to be on the same area as Seventeen, and I felt so ecstatic like I'm in cloud nine.

Although me and my friends were separated by barricade while we're looking for coffee, we still had a great time chatting with others.

Finally, we we're allowed to go inside and find our VIP seats. I was so overwhelmed, because of how close it was to the stage as compared to my previous lower box experience, that I couldn't stop from shedding happy tears. My sister was in awe, and I held onto her as I calm myself.

This is the moment I've been waiting for. Not only these past 2 years, but I think that I needed this for my whole life.

I cried once again after the concert. I was so happy. I've never been this happy in my life. Everything was worth it and I don't regret anything.

SepAnx was real, as me, my sister and my friend, cried during our flight back to the province. But despite the longing, we knew that February 8, 2020 will forever go down in the history as the perfect day when we were able to reached goals, and became the happiest fangirl in the universe.

Hopefully, we would be able to do this again when the world heals. And when that time comes, I hope we'll see them, all thirteen of them.

#ode to you in mnl #odetoyou #seventeen #fangirl #fangirlstory #seungcheol #jeonghan #jisoo #junhui #soonyoung #wonwoo #jihoon #myungho #mingyu #seokmin #seungkwan #hansol #chan

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