#it's 7:30am. i should sleep huh?

[transgender-catboy]

up too late thinking about my past

yuck

[eljiell]

I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT THAT! [ Lev haiba x fem!reader ]

My works are made for chubby readers but, it is not implied on this one.

Ever since you and Lev started dating, you haven’t been able to experience the feeling of being alone in your personal space. Well, it’s not like you’re complaining. You love him and his presence. Your giant man who tries to hog all your attention to himself. 

 

You and Lev agreed to spend the holidays with your side of the family. He said that he wanted to meet those people who raised his beloved. 

 

Your family is big, not just big like 7 people. Once all of you have gathered at the main house, it will start to look like the whole city in a single household. 16 cousins, including you—you’re the youngest. You have 8 nephews and nieces who range from 10 years old to 2 months old. There’s around 10 elders. But that’s fine. The main house is basically a compound; it has 4 houses, a big garage, and a big backyard. 

 

Christmas was a blast; you were able to introduce Lev to everyone. It wasn’t surprising when everyone loved him, especially the elders. They all said that you guys were a perfect couple. So while he was basically stuck conversing with the elders, you were bonding with your baby nephews and nieces with your other cousins. You’ve always loved kids; the kids have always been drawn to you. It was no surprise that when the night came, they all wanted to sleep next to you—well, not all. 2 of your nieces wanted to. With two kids between you and Lev, he wasn’t able to cuddle up with you. He probably won't be able to in the three following hours either.

 

"Hey, babe,” Lev whispered, facing your side of the bed. 

 

You can see his pout, and you know the reason behind it.

 

“Hm?"You said while nuzzling up with your baby nieces. 

 

“I love you,” he said, stretching his arms to carefully caress your soft cheeks.

 

“I love you more, babe,” you responded, leaning forward his touch. “C’mon get some rest now; there will be lots of cooking tomorrow,” you added, smiling at him.

 

Morning came, you woke up, and you were alone in the bed. The three that were with you already made their way outside to start their day. You checked the time, and it was only 7:30am. You cleaned the room and got ready for the day. You joined them outside, having conversations with everyone, helping with cooking, decorating, and taking carrots of kids.

 

December 24, 2024

11:59 pm.

“Come now, everyone. Let’s have a countdown.”

You and Lev stood next to each other, gleefully waiting for Christmas.

 

3

2

1

 

Merry Christmas!!

Everyone shouted; fireworks were lit up.

 

After that, the party began, and everyone was opening their presents. 

 

The party started to settle down after a couple of hours.

 

Everyone went to their respective rooms. The two small girls who slept with you and Lev last night decided that it was time to spend the night with their mommies. “Really? You don’t wanna sleep with Auntie anymore? "You pouted at the two girls. “Mhm, mommy said that families should be together during holidays,” one of them said. "Yep, yep, also, big bro over there was talking with us earlier; he said he reallyllyyy loves cuddling with you,” the other girl pointed at your boyfriend. 

 

Lev was shocked and turned his back. “Huh? Me? Ahh, I know nothing about that,” he said, slightly panicking.

 

You just giggled and gave the little girls a peck on the cheek. Both of them left your room and went to their family.

 

You walked towards your boyfriend, who was now sitting on the edge of the bed. “Did you really say that, hm?"You said, joining him and slightly chuckling.

 

“W-what? No…” he said while he lied down to cover himself with a blanket.

 

“Sure, you did not,” you said, tucking yourself next to him. “I was planning to give you extra kisses and everything because I felt bad for not being able to do so last night,” you whispered to his ear. “But I guess I was mistaken,” you said, rolling towards your side of the bed.

 

Lev tensed up and instantly rolled next to you. “Come here, please?"He whispered. “I miss you so much.” You can basically see his pout despite the lack of light. You chuckled at his behavior. 

 

mwuah

 

You kissed him. He kissed you back; well, no, he peppered you with kisses. “I need to take back what I missed yesterday,” Lev said. 

[thevelria]

Emerald (ErenxReader) Chapter 2 - Attitude

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Author's note: 15.000+ characters

Chapter contains swearing, drinking alcholol, mentoning drug use etc

Enjoy~

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After only two and a half hours of sleep you wished to be dead, when the alarm started to scream into your face. You needed at least 6-7 hours of sleep to be able to function like a normal human being. But last night went way too long, you regretted the fact that you wanted to be nice to Eren.

-He didn't even deserve it -you cussed in the bathroom, brushing your teeth with eyes closed- I'm so gonna be fucked up today.

Walking back and forth in the room, you had no idea what to wear. Didn't feel the energy to dress nice, but it was only your second day, so even if the office didn't have a dress code you weren't confident enough to show up in yoga pants and hoodies. Finally you put on a black tight skirt with buttons all along on the side, a light baby blue shirt and a black blazer. Forming a lazy, messy bun at the top of your head and slipping into some heels ready to leave and face reality. You still needed the job, because you didn't turn out to be super rich during your sleep session.

You were already on the way to the car, when you remembered, you forgot the mug. Some cursing, eye rolling and wishing everyone to fuck themselves you stomped back and grabbed a beige mug from the kitchen, which had Goku on it. It was your favorite mug ever, so you felt maybe it could help you through the day.

-Morning -you mumbled under your nose, feeling the huge bags under your eyes.

-Goooood morning, honey! -Sasha jumped up from her desk, heading to you immediately -Uhh, girl what's wrong? -she widened her eyes, when she noticed how terrible you looked.

-Lack of sleep, I suppose -you sighed irritated.

-We didn't even leave that late last night -she raised one of her eyebrows -Come, let's drink a coffee!

-You didn't, but I arrived home around 4:30am -you yawned big- That coffee sounds so tempting -you searched for your mug in your bag.

-Huh? Why? What did you do? -she asked confused on the way to the kitchen.

-Eren asked me to drop him out in a hotel, then invited me for a drink. We talked and it was somehow fucking early in the morning. I'm going to die today! -you whined.

-Eren did what? He never asks any of us to...

-I don't know Sasha, I just didn't want to be a rude ass...but maybe I should have, because now I'm literally dying.

Taking sips from the hot coffee on the way back to your desk you zoned out a bit, dreaming of your comfy bed, how the bed sheets feel so soft and cozy. The thought of it almost made you cry.

-Today is the same as yesterday? -you asked Sasha, grabbing your notebook and pencil and was about to leave to her table.

-Nope, sweety. You will need to sit with Eren, he's gonna show you the exact job you will be going to do here.

-Nah, please nooo -you started fake crying.

-Good luck -she laughed out loud, because she exactly knew it was going to be a tough task not to punch Eren in the face in the condition you were in at the moment.

You took a deep, huge breath and as letting the air slowly out you grabbed your stuff, heading to his desk.

-Morning -you mumbled-Sasha said today I need to learn from you.

-Morning grumpy -he giggled- Yeah, grab a chair -he pointed behind his back.

-It's all your fault -you yawned, grabbing a chair and throwing yourself lazily.

-Yep, I know -he clicked his tongue- I'm tired too, just to let you know.

-Bu-hu, poor you -you rolled your eyes.

-Fuck, you are really an ass, when you are tired -he laughed out loud.

-Meh, shut up and show me this shit...please -you faked a cute smile.

Eren didn't say anything, just shook his head slightly, smiling at your attitude.

His low, throaty voice sounded so calming, ringing you almost to sleep. And even if you should have focused on him telling and showing you your tasks you felt slowly falling asleep.

-HEY! -he poked you with his elbow- Wake up...Jesus -he rolled his eyes annoyed.

-What? -you woke up immediately, not knowing what happened- Oh my God -you started to laugh- I'm so sorry.

-Focus...please -he clenched his jaw- I'm not gonna finish my work, because I have to babysit you, so you better start to listen.

-Wow! -you pulled a face- No need to be a dickhead -you crossed your hands before your chest. And it was your fault again...your voice is just too calming and I fell asleep listening to you -you rolled your eyes offended.

-How old are you? 10? -he hissed.

-Oh, fuck you Jaeger -you snaped back- I don't want to sit here as much as you don't want me to be here next to you! I cannot help it. I can ask Reiner, he might be a bit nicer than you...asshole.

-Drop the attitude woman -he said with a cold tone.

-You mean the attitude you are giving me now? -you raised one of your eyebrows. You really wanted to punch him in the face.

He was about to tell you some not too nice things, when Levi's door shot open and he rushed towards you two.

-JAEGER! -he screamed from the bottom of his lungs. Shit, he was truly scary as Sasha mentioned you yesterday.

-Yes, boss? -he looked at the pissed off man.

-I just got a fucking angry call from a freaking client. Where's this truck? -he slammed a piece of paper at the desk, making it shiver a little bit.

-Fuck -Eren said as he checked it in the system.

-Yeah...fuck. FUCK YOU! Why can't you just do your job, huh? I don't care what your personal problems are...one more mistake and you are OUT! -he kept yelling at him.

-You know what? -Eren jumped up from his chair, pushing you aside a bit- FUCK YOU! I'm so fucking fed up with your bullshit -he rushed out from the room, slamming the door behind him.

This bitch ass loud argument woke you up in an instant, you were sitting in the chair, grabbing your cup of coffee and didn't know what to do.

-You! -Levi pointed at you- Fix this shit! -he spun on his heels and left you alone.

Everyone froze in their action in the office, no one was brave enough even just to breathe a bit louder. You gulped big and sat into Eren's chair. After 10 minutes of wondering between the emails and checking excel sheets and documents you figured out what the problem was. You made some calls and finally it was fixed. As much you felt proud of yourself as much you felt sorry for Eren. Levi's act didn't seem fair at all. As you could see it wasn't even Eren's fault the truck being late. You slowly stood up and walked out of the room, trying to figure out where he could leave.

After wandering around for a few minutes you walked to the smoking spot and you were right. He's been leaning against the plastic wall, taking deep drags from his cigarette.

-Hey -you smiled nicely, stepping next to him.

-What? -he hissed, not even looking at you.

-I fixed it, don't worry -you tried to start a conversation. His hands were shaking like a leaf from the anger.

-Do you want a fucking trophy or what?

-Nah, I'm more like a tiara girl -you smirked.

He didn't say anything, but cracked a half smile.

-Want one? -he offered you a smoke.

-Thanks -you nodded, taking out one from the packet. You leaned closer as he clicked the lighter -He shouldn't yell at you like that. It wasn't even your fault -you said.

-Whatever -he shrugged, still shaking.

-Just try to calm down, it's not worth it -you smiled.

-Oh shut up! -he yelled at you, rolling his eyes irritated- Don't act like you know everything.

-Drop the act -you stayed calm- I know you are not an asshole even if you want me to believe that.

-Can you just leave me the fuck alone?

-Nope -you clicked your tongue- You are exactly like my former coworker. Don't think for a second that I don't know what you are trying to do.

-You don't know shit about me -he hissed, flicking the butt to the ashtray and was about to leave.

-Eren -you grabbed his wrist slightly.

He froze in his action, didn't know how to react.

-I'm sorry -he sighed, clenching his jaw.

-Let's go back -you smiled, finishing your smoke as well.

The day rushed to its end and you tried your best to focus on everything he said, taking tons of notes. Around 16:30 everyone started to pack their stuff except Eren and Reiner.

-You can go -he yawned- I won't finish sometimes soon, but you don't need to stay.

-Nah...tell me what I can help with.

-You don't have to -he argued.

-I know -you shrugged your shoulders.

-You are annoying -he rolled his eyes.

-So are you -you laughed out loud.

-Fine -he sighed- Bring your laptop, I will give you some tasks to do.

As you walked to your desk, collecting the device Sasha stopped next to you.

-What are you doing? -she looked confused.

-I'm gonna help them to finish faster -you smiled, holding your laptop.

-Levi's gonna like you -she laughed.

-I don't need his sympathy, I just wanna help the guys to finish earlier -you said with a serious tone, leaving Sasha behind.

After Eren explained what you can help with, you started to work and so all of you finished around 7.

-Yo, Reiner! -Eren stood up, grabbing his jacket- Down for a drink?

-Sorry Jaeger, not today -he waved you guys goodbye.

-Y/N? -he turned to you.

-Nah, I'm tired as hell. I want to sleep.

-Pleaseee -he pulled a puppy face.

-Eren...stop -you shook your head.

-Just one!

-I'm starving -you whined, walking to your desk followed by him.

-Then let's go for dinner first -he tried to bargain.

-You are really a pain in the ass -you sighed annoyed.

-I'm gonna wait for you at the parking lot -he winked at you, leaving the room.

You already regretted being nice to him, because now it looked like he stuck to you. It happened all the time. Whenever you were nice to someone you couldn't get rid of them anymore. Even if you loved being left alone in peace. You could have been an asshole and rejected his invitation like you usually would do, but there was something about him, which made you act otherwise. You just didn't want to hurt his feelings, you really felt sorry for this broken guy.

-Come! -you called out, when you arrived at your car.

-I hoped you would have been the driver again -he smirked, sliding in.

-Oh shut up -you rolled your eyes- You are already exhausted, pissed off and you want to drink...Like I have any other choice -you pulled an annoyed face- But I'll choose the place, something near to my place and you can catch a cab, when we are done.

-Deal! -he smiled widely.

You drove the car to your favorite bar. It was at the end of the street of your home, so it seemed like a perfect choice.

-Wall of Rose - Eren read out loud the sign of the bar- What a stupid name for a bar.

-C'mon -you got out of your car- I don't have time for you all night long.

After your order arrived at the table you started to stuff your mouth like there was no tomorrow.

-What? -you ask.

-You really are hungry.

-Duh...I told you I am. Is there any problem with it?

-No -he chuckles- Girls just usually are shy eating in front of a guy -he shrugged.

-Yeah, when they are on a date and not being with a simple coworker -you kept eating.

-Ohh...- he seemed somehow offended?!- I'm gonna get a drink. Tonic again?

-No way! -you laughed- I want a good, cold beer -you licked your bottom lip.

-Full of surprise -he chuckled, heading to the bartender.

Eren kept drinking beer after beer, getting tipsier minute by minute.

-You should stop -you said, finishing your first bottle.

-What? Why? -he yawned big, not bothering to cover his mouth.

-You drank like 4 bottles in the last 10 minutes. You're gonna get wasted.

-So what?

-Wanna talk about it? -you raised one of your eyebrows. Maybe the booze, maybe the actions of today, maybe just you being too kind to him, but he felt like he wanted to spit out everything.

-I'm so fucking miserable -he shook his head- I feel so burnt out, you know. She just keeps chewing on my life, makes everything ten times harder than it should be.

You kept silent, listening to him carefully.

-How long are you married? -you asked.

-5 years, but I have known her since diapers. She was always around, never leaving me alone. Protecting me all the time, convincing me this was love we had between us. Love? -he laughed bitter- Love my ass. She's just a freaking psycho. So fucking obsessed with me that it terrifies me to the bones. Jealous all the time, I can't look or talk to a girl without her thinking I cheat on her -he hissed angrily.

-Are you sure it cannot be fixed between you too? If you know her this long, maybe there's a chance...

-A chance for what? -he cut you mid sentence- Changing Mikasa? There's no way in hell -he laughed out loud with so much pain in his voice- God, even if we are on a divorce, if she would see us now she would try to beat the shit out of you.

-Sorry? -you looked surprised.

-Yeah...she's crazy.

-Well -you smirked- I don't know how strong she is, but believe me it's not easy to beat my ass.

-Haha, I'm sure of it, you look tough as hell -he smiled at you- I'm happy I met you, Y/N.

-Easy, tiger -you laughed out loud- Don't get too emotional, you are ruining my opinion about you being a total dickhead.

-Shut up! -he chuckled again- There's gonna be a huge ass party Saturday at Jean's place. Wanna come?

-Please, Eren...-you shook your head desperately.

-What? -he looked confused.

-I love being alone on the weekends -you laughed out loud- You have no idea how freaking antisocial I am. I hate parties... like a lot.

-Yeah, sure.

-Seriously. So, I'm sorry, but I need to pass.

-Please!

-Why? You will have your friends there, won't you?

-You are more fun to be around -he smirked at you.

-Ohh drop this shit act, Jaeger -you sat back at your chair.

-Fine -he rolled his eyes.

-It was a perfect night, but I'm gonna go now. You will be okay? -you asked, standing up, grabbing your stuff- Or should I call you a cab?

-I think I will just walk -he shrugged.

-What? Why?

-I'm too drunk to get a cab. They won't let me get in -he chuckled, focusing on standing straight.

-You're such a pain in the ass -you shook your head annoyed- Come with me. He followed you without a word, sliding in your car easily.

-Home? -you turned to him.

-No way!

-You will need to pay for my gas next time. I'm like your fucking personal driver.

-A pretty, badass driver -he wiggled in his seat, trying to get comfortable with his eyes closed.

You didn't react, because you knew it was just the alcohol talking. He was hurt and desperate, so there was no point in taking him seriously at all.

-Where do you live? -he asked out of the blue, when he felt the car start to move.

-Why?

-Just curious -he shrugged.

-We will pass in front of my house, it's at the end of this street.

-This one -you pointed at the small, but cute looking house.

-Sweet -he smiled- Do you mind? -he turned on the radio.

-No, I always listen to music, when I drive -you cracked a half smile, when you heard one of your favorite songs, Riot by Hollywood Undead to start.

-Fuck, I love this song! -he volumed it up.

"I've been searching for an answer, but I ain't found one

I've been known to tear shit up and go off like a gun

I've been drinking way too much, but now I think I'm done"

You started to sing the lyrics right away, drumming your fingers on the driving wheel.

"Fuck that shit, let's start a riot!

Let's start a riot!

Tear shit up, fuck peace and quiet!"

Eren yelled the phrase with a huge smile on his face. He looked way too hyped by the song.

"I gotta get, I gotta get that feeling

Gotta get higher than the twenty-foot ceiling"

Both of you followed the lyrics this time.

-I wonder -he turned to you- do you get high?

-Sometimes -you shrugged.

-No way! -he slammed his fist against his mouth, laughing.

-What? -you asked, smiling.

-You look so innocent and yet you are a freaking badass bitch.

-Watch your mouth, Jaeger -you rolled your eyes. But deep inside you loved the way he reacted.

-Want one? -he moved his eyebrows up and down fast.

-Now? No way!

-Why? I thought you were cool -he faked a sad smile.

-I am cool -you looked seriously into his eyes- Cooler than you will ever find out -you smirked.

-Challenge accepted!

-We are here -you pulled out in front of the hotel- Good night.

-You are such a party breaker -he shook his head sadly.

-Yeah, I'm such a terrible person -you gasped ironically.

-See you in the morning, pretty -he got out of the car, closing the door, leaving you with a confused look on your face. 

[jodilin65]

THURSDAY, JANUARY 31, 1991 God, I am so tired. I fell asleep at 9:00 and sure enough, I woke up at 1:00 after sleeping 4 hours. I woke up sneezing and blowing my nose. My lungs don’t feel bad and I’d rather wake up to sneeze and blow my nose rather than coughing and wheezing.

Andy came over saying he thinks he may be catching a cold and I hope that doesn’t worsen mine cuz you know how weak my immune system is.

I need to try to quit smoking again soon and also go see Dr. McGovern. I need more Theodur and I guess I’ll also discuss allergy shots. I wish I could do the natural cure by quitting smoking permanently!

Russ called tonight sounding sincere again saying he’d really like to resolve our dispute. I told him once again that if he’s willing to drop it, I’ll drop it and that I surely do not plan to live here forever. I also told him that for the last 3 days, it hasn’t been bad in here cuz it’s been a little warmer outside, but as soon as it gets bitter cold out, it gets cold in here. I reminded him again that I, and the other tenants, wouldn’t complain for no reason and hopefully it sank in this time and he’ll give up on his spite tricks. But as long as he’s gonna push the eviction, I’m gonna push small claims court. If anything, he owes me money that I’ve paid for the heat that was supposed to be included in my rent that I never got.

Boy, is it ever windy out now. It sounds like someone’s screaming.

I really do need to try and go back to sleep, so first I’ll make coffee, smoke a butt, listen to a little music, and then I should be more than ready.

Tomorrow I’ve got to go to Food Fart.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 30, 1991 Andy better hurry up. His show starts at 1:00. If he’s not here, I’ll record it. He’s supposedly coming over with

Later…

I was interrupted before cuz the phone rang and two seconds before Andy’s show came on he walked in. His show wasn’t on anyway cuz of the Gulf War update. He was pissed and I don’t blame him cuz that’s what the news hour is for. They shouldn’t keep interrupting the shows. News belongs on the news.

He’ll be here for 6 hours editing his tapes.

I got a call from Martha and I am going to see her later at 4:00.

Later…

I’m glad I went to therapy after all. I got a lot of shit off my chest. We basically discussed how I view myself and how others view me. I told her how and why I thought I was a quality person who may appear goofy and playful but is mature and good at knowing other people’s characters. We talked about how there are many types of people that I dislike, but I still understand why they’re the way they are.

I also discussed how I get the types that are loud, obnoxious and desperate or the geeky shy types that can’t speak for themselves and aren’t firm enough when they need to be. I told her I need someone more outspoken and loving and understanding, yet as rough and as tough as they need to be.

My sister called. I told her if worse came to worse she could check out apartments for me.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 29, 1991 Yesterday I woke up feeling like shit. I was really congested. I took my asthma pill and some Dimetapp and Brenda gave me some Anthramycin which is an antibiotic. As long as I eat a little before taking it, it doesn’t play with my stomach.

Yesterday I woke up at 7:30am. Today I woke up at 6am. Nice, huh? Now wait till I have to perform this Friday night. But my point is that even though I woke up with a coughing fit after I’d slept 4 hours like I usually do, I woke up later feeling great! The antibiotic really helped with my congestion. I haven’t sneezed yet and haven’t blown my nose 5,000 times.

I’ve had half a cigarette though and I’m gonna do the 2-3 a day thing rather than 5-6 to really lower my nicotine level and try quitting again. Kim offered me 5 bucks a day if I quit. That does make it more encouraging, besides the idea of being able to breathe and sing without clearing my throat or sneezing.

Speaking of my voice, God is it really developing! I’m really getting to be quite a good singer. It gets more and more brilliant and vibrant.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 27, 1991 Russ came over yesterday before noon. He asked me to write down every time it got cold and what the temperature was after putting a thermometer in each room.

He told me he was prepared for the judge to allow me to stay until October but that he hoped it wouldn’t come down to court. There’s nothing solid or valid he could do or say in court, and I told him I would move when I’m ready to move.

Tomorrow, I’m going to call legal aid.

Later…

I was over at Brenda and Bonny’s place and I played them the edits I made early this morning. They’re not bad. I gave Bonny this T-shirt she liked and she gave me a denim mini-skirt. She also gave me little bulletin boards in the shape of the letters L and R. L and R can stand for Linda Ronstadt.

Kim will be here any moment for a sign language lesson.

Lisa, the girl I met at the Pub said she’s home all the time. Well, she must have her ringer off if she did give me the right number cuz I tried 4 times and there’s no answer. She’ll have to call me.

I’m starting to get a little tired. I hope Bill’s not here too long. Also, Andy needs to bring over my videotape along with his so I can record his show.

Later…

I’ve had a great day today. Bonny and I have gotten to be pretty good friends. “It’s better than fighting,” like she said.

Andy and I had a nice visit although the woman he’s renting from is really treating him like shit. He’s moving back in with his parents by Valentine’s Day.

Bill, Andy and I had a nice talk, and I played them my new edition of the edits.

I’m beat cuz I’ve been up since 2am, so I should sleep quite well. I just hope that none of these fucking street animals wake me up.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 26, 1991 Andy and I performed tonight. Neither of us won, but it was fun just the same. The audience and the judges didn’t dislike us, but we both felt we were nothing special and could’ve been better.

It amazes me how many people I know. People came up to me before the show and talked to me that I didn’t even know that knew me from previous shows. This one guy remembered when I signed and said that was “fierce.” I saw tons of people I knew who complimented me after the show and I was also complimented by people I didn’t know. Raven was there along with Emie, Loopie, Candy, Jasmine, Miles, W.C., Scott, Rachel, Dedra and at least 20 or more other people I know.

I met this incredibly feminine girl named Lisa who gave me her number if it’s the right one. I wasn’t too impressed with her hair which was short on top and spiked with a long tail in the back. Her body and her face were beautiful, though. She’s not bi either, she’s just gay.

Last year, though, I would really be into her and meeting others. I used to be so eager. Now my heart’s just not in it like it used to be. There’s still a great part of me saying, “All I want now is to be alone and I’m not even quite ready yet for a one-night stand.”

I saw 3 other girls who were even more gorgeous, and yes, I would do a one-nighter with them right away (one at a time, of course). One was straight, as usual. The other 2 were a couple, also as usual. They were so feminine, though, and each one had such nice long dark hair.

Also, I chatted with the cops.

Later…

I broke down in tears thinking about this shit with Russ and finally said to myself that I was going to put an end to this either the easy way or the hard way. So I called Russ and asked to speak to him. He said sure and sounded very friendly and sincere. I figured he’d more or less have nothing to say to me.

Anyway, I said to him, “How can you be so cruel and vindictive when you never were before? You’ve done me favors such as not having me pay last month’s rent and got me movers. So why are you so eager to see me out on the streets when you know I have nothing, no money, no family and nowhere to go? I have never hurt anyone or anything and I don’t know what you can say in court or if this is a tax-related thing or what. You even said so yourself that it would get cold in here when it got bitter cold outside and you know there have been several other tenants complaining. If you’d stop putting temperature recorders in here that say it’s a temperature it’s not, then I’ll forget about taking legal action if you’re willing to drop this and turn up the heat.”

He sounded friendly, as I said, and said he’d like to stop up and see me sometime before noon. I’ve no idea what he’s planning, but I’ll write about it once I know.

FRIDAY, JANUARY 25, 1991 Shadow’s climbing all over me. I swear this cat is so affectionate and loving. He follows me everywhere. I should’ve named him Glue instead. Earlier I was running around the living room with him. We have several games we play.

I spoke to Andy a little while ago for the second time. I told him I’d record his show for him on one of my tapes.

The reason I’ve been sleeping during the day, which of course is never hard to do, is cuz as I mentioned before, Andy and I are performing at the Pub a noche.

Andy told me another bizarre thing. First, let me back up and mention Angie. I don’t think I did mention her. A while back, not even a month ago, we went to the Pub and I eyed this girl, she seemed prettier than usual and had Andy speak to her for me. When he came back to where I was sitting he said she was a rude bitch. He said she said, “Well, after I dump this asshole I’ll think about it.”

She was with another girl. Angie was totally smashed and the next part of the story will tell you so.

As Andy and I were leaving at closing time, we walked by Angie and her girlfriend and Andy goes, “Now, here’s the better-looking girl,” and she saw me and insisted I come back to the bar. She hadn’t seen what I looked like till then.

Now here’s the sad but typical part. Especially for a bar person and a fairly good-looking one. She screamed out so the whole bar could hear, “Will you lick my pussy?” Then she did the usual trick people do and gave me the wrong phone number.

What’s bizarre is that Andy was cutting through this Laundromat to his mother’s store that I’ve been to before, and it turns out Angie works there. That Laundromat is a dump. I used to go there when I lived on Oswego St.

He said he said her name to be sure and she said, “Yeah, I’m Angie. How’d you know?”

Then Andy told her, “You don’t want to know.” Andy said she had no makeup on and looked tired.

He also said that maybe God sent him to walk through there to find out where she works so I can take it from there.

I definitely don’t want a relationship nowadays with even the right person. I just wanna have fun here and there, but not with just anyone. Right now what’s most important to me and mainly on my mind is having what I’ve never had in my entire 25 years of life. Sex with someone I’m really sexually attracted to and turned on by if only for a night. I’d rather have a few one-nighters here and there even if it’s only 5 a year with someone I’m attracted to, rather than get serious with someone who doesn’t really matter.

Later…

I went through all my journals and I’ve kept journals for 3 years and 3 months now. I went through each one and wrote the entry dates on the covers. I guess that’s gonna be my new thing. I’ve written 360 days of the 3 years and 3 months’ time. On the cover of each book I wrote the month and then each day of that month that I wrote.

I think I’m gonna go lay down. It’s fucking freezing in here! That little fuck of a bastard landlord of mine. Boy, do I ever want to hound the shit out of him!

Later…

The housing people are coming on Monday and I called Mom who was being her usual bitchy self and asked if she’s heard from him, which I doubted, and she hasn’t. This shit Russ is pulling is definitely tax-related as well as to raise the rent when I’m gone. But I’m gonna be here for a while, and if Russ keeps this shit up, it’s gonna cost him more money than a profit.

A few years ago when Nellie and José pulled their crap on me by ripping me off, I brought up charges and was able to drop them over the phone after being paid back by Nellie. Well, I just tried that by calling the courthouse saying I was Jenny and it didn’t work but all is still well cuz I’m not going to court.

I will not give Jenny the satisfaction of showing up for a lousy slew of prank phone calls. Jenny got exactly what she deserved and I know lots of other people have done the same.

I haven’t heard from John R since he got fired from Mercy Hospital.

I tried calling the Laundromat where Angie works and no one’s there now but this retard janitor. Guess they don’t open till 10:00. I’ll try again soon.

THURSDAY, JANUARY 24, 1991 When I finally fell asleep I’d been up for 20 hours. I awoke at 8:30 this morning. I’m surprised I didn’t sleep longer since I couldn’t fall asleep till 4:00 this afternoon.

I called Community Care and left a message for Martha saying I wouldn’t be back. I figure how am I ever going to learn how to suppress my feelings and be independent if I continue therapy? Yes I know I’m already what most people would call mega-independent for a girl my age especially. All except for my source of income. I’m not gonna get into my income except to say yes, I’d much rather earn it by singing and someday I will but for now, I do not feel guilty. The state owes me. They fucked me over. And over. And over.

Although I’ve known all my life that being a famous singer was destined, I also knew it wouldn’t come young. I figured I’d be between the ages of 30-32. I knew it’d be fast once it all started. That may be why it’s not coming till 30-32 rather than now.

Also, I knew that the Gods had lots of learning experiences for me and survival tests lined up for me and boy have I now had 5 lifetimes of that! However, I am grateful to have learned some of the things I’ve learned. What you don’t know can hurt you or severely frustrate you or raise false hopes for you.

I am surprised Andy and Fran haven’t tried calling. Also, there was no message on the machine from Brenda.

Later…

I am going to try to stay up till 9:00 when the Western Mass legal aid office opens. I need to speak to a legal intern who’s got some advice for me. I don’t know if I wrote about it yet, but Russ is being a prick by trying to evict me. I know it’s cuz I’ve been demanding the heat that I pay for in my rent that I haven’t gotten along with several other tenants. This may also be for tax purposes or to get people out so he can raise the rent. My parents and Tammy are pissed at him and Dad referred me to Legal Aid. The little fuck, though, wouldn’t speak to me or Tammy and never called Dad back. He refuses to give me a reason while he told Andy it was cuz I didn’t like the neighborhood so I can move out. I was in the ER at the time so he handed the notice to Andy.

I went down to the housing court and the woman there said that cuz I pay on the 1st, he can’t evict me till February 9th. He gave me a 30-day notice on January 9th, but by law, the little fuck can’t do shit till March 1st. Hopefully, Russ will hurry up and take me to court so I can sue him there and try and get rent back payments for the months I froze my ass off. That’s probably what that Wendy at Legal Aid will tell me to do. I mean, what the fuck does this prick expect to say or do in court other than make a spectacle out of himself. Steve says the jackass will drop it. Bullshit. I know how people are. When they start trouble they start trouble but this little fuck obviously doesn’t realize he’s fucking with the wrong girl.

Same with Jenny C. Court on March 6th! HA! Jenny got exactly what she deserved, so she’s going to have to enjoy going to court herself cuz I sure as hell won’t be there.

Later…

Me and Andy are performing at the Pub this Friday night. He’s gonna do If I Were You by Stevie Nicks and I’m gonna do Words Get in the Way by Gloria.

Speaking of Gloria, she’s got a new album due to come out in 5 days. I hope there are some songs in Spanish on it. I wish I could’ve gotten that album with a lot of her songs in Spanish on it including Words Get in the Way (No Me Vuelvo a Enamorar). It would be better to do the Spanish version for the contest. I’ll need to order that album.

Brenda gave me 2 ciggies so now that’ll make 7. I’m really gonna pay for this. God, please don’t let me have a bad attack till I can once again get up the will to try and quit again.

Ok, time to move me, my coffee and my phone to the bedroom where I’m nice and comfortable.

Later…

I woke up feeling fairly good. I slept with my humidifier on.

Little fuck Fran’s up to his shit again. I woke up to a message from his neighbor Debbie accusing me of saying I’m gonna hurt her 2-year-old daughter and that Fran got a call from DES. I then had to explain to her how long I’ve known Fran and how little she knew him and that she had quite a bit to learn. This poor girl was terrified and I assured her no threats were made. Fran got her all worked up and it’s obviously a rejection issue or the fact that Fran had a horrendously lousy day. Debbie said I sounded sincere and I told her not to worry about Fran’s BS and not to let it get to her. I also told her to tell Fran that not only is he not welcome here anymore, but he’s not welcome to call me either. Between the shit Fran pulled with my mother along with other stuff and now this, that’s the final straw and I don’t need him.

Andy left a message about returning the videotape of his so I can record his soap. I called over where he lives and Gail says he’s not there. I also called over at Brenda’s, assuming he’d be there, but there was no answer.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 23, 1991 I have therapy today yet I don’t know how the hell I’m going to get there. I slept till almost 8:00 last night.

Andy came over last night and once again things are fairly good between us now that we’re not living together. See, when you have a fight with someone over the phone, you can just hang up on them. It’s not that simple when you’re living with someone.

Since Sunday I’ve been having 2-3 cigarettes a day and it’s catching up to me so I’ve got to be careful again. My back pain’s back and I’m waking up coughing again.

MONDAY, JANUARY 21, 1991 Yesterday my niece Lisa turned 8.

The day before yesterday I had about 4 cigarettes. I was terrified to go to bed thinking I’d wake up with a wicked bad attack, but I woke up fine. In fact, I feel better than I have in a long time. My nose and lungs are clearer and I’m not tight in the chest and there’s no back pain. Today I’ve had only one, but I could really go for one now.

Later…

Right after I last wrote, Jimmy gave me a cigarette which was my second. I fell asleep at 9:00 this morning figuring it’d be easy to get up at 1pm cuz I’d slept so many hours the day before. How wrong I was. I was dead tired. I didn’t get up until a few minutes before 4:00 when Bill rang the buzzer. I remained tired ever since but at least I got my grocery shopping done. I want to do more laundry tonight but I’m too beat. Last night I did two loads from around 12:30-2:30 AM. It was quite convenient as I’m a night person and knowing no one would be using the machines.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 19, 1991 Sure enough, I fucking woke up hacking my brains out about an hour ago. I had fallen asleep right after I last wrote. I definitely have a cold. No doubt about it as I can really feel it now.

Andy said that even when I feel I’ve kicked the smoking habit, I’ll still have urges. Of course, I know I will every so often and Andy’s been supportive but I think he’s starting to get jealous somewhat. God knows he’s very capable of that too, as I’ve seen him display jealousy before. It’s ok to feel a little jealous of someone now and then but it depends on how you handle that jealousy. Andy has quit before for 10 days two different times. Depending on the situation, I sometimes will look at a glass of water as being either half full or half empty. Andy will always see it as half empty.

Well, the street animals are out playing musical horns as usual.

Thank fucking God Andy will be here in less than 12 hours!

Later…

I wish to hell I could go back to sleep for a while. I have a lot of shit I need to do today and I want to sleep tomorrow night to be awake for Sunday’s voice lesson.

I started to get really pissed off with my urge to smoke. Even though they’re not intense, they’re still pretty frequent and I know it’ll be this way forever. The thought of always craving a cigarette pissed me off to the point where I held one and stared at it. I told myself if I smoked it, I’d have a severe attack which is true. I told myself I didn’t want to ever have to go to the ER again and be within inches of death 24 hours a day and in so much constant pain that I WISHED I were dead. I also thought of my singing. Yes, craving one is a better way of suffering, but it’s going to suck just the same. Since I do not drink or do drugs, it’s hard not having something of some kind to do, and watching others smoke.

FRIDAY, JANUARY 18, 1991 If I’m such a cruel nasty bitch who has so many bad points and not too much good, as people like to tell me, then why do people bother with me? Why not go find someone like themselves? I’m sorry but I just don’t feel guilty or selfish cuz I want to live alone. Or be myself.

I haven’t talked with Steve or Jessie for the longest time. I’m not good enough for them. That’s how I feel. I can’t help but always feel that with everyone even though I know I have good qualities. If I dump all my friends I won’t have to worry about communication and being misunderstood. Or feeling like I’m not good enough or a burden to them. People can be so contradicting, too. They play with my head. I’ll say something in which they’ll say they agree with 100%, then the next day they’ll use it against me and play me for a fool. Like, “How dare you say that Jodi!” But yesterday they agreed with and fully understood what I said. I’m no longer gonna be made to feel ashamed, foolish or guilty about the way I feel about things. The way I feel is the way I feel and who and what I am is who and what I am. Not what others want me to be, say, act or feel.

Later…

The little wimpett is going to start moving today and be out by tomorrow. I’m counting down the minutes.

Another reason I haven’t spoken to Steve is, that I’m tired of the “Andy said” bullshit. It puts me on the spot when I’m all of a sudden hit with something Andy said. Then I have to defend myself and explain something he made up or twisted around to make them dislike me or misunderstand me. He loves to turn people against me and he’s dropped plenty of hints that he’s had some pretty long and heavy-duty talks with his friend Adam concerning me. With many others, too. If you typed up all he’s ever said to people about me, he’d have a 3” thick book. Of course, in the long run, as far as Andy thinks, he’s 95% right and I’m 95% wrong.

Later…

Tomorrow Mr. Melodramatic is out of here. Thank fucking God! I can’t wait to have this place back to myself. I don’t know how much longer I’ll be here but God only knows I’m counting down the minutes till Mr. Antic is out of here.

It shocks the shit out of me to say that as of 1am tonight, it’ll be 5 days, going on 6, since I last smoked. Amazing, huh? Not that I’m not getting urges here and there. I am. But the urges are very brief and 5 days is fantastic seeing that the longest I’ve ever made it before was just a tad over 2 days. My back pain is gone. And I am no longer so severely short of breath. I’m still a little tight in the chest, though, and a little wheezy and still coughing and sneezing some. Besides having bad withdrawal I also have a cold. The cold is subsiding much quicker than it would’ve if I smoked still. It’ll be really nice to only have a cold for 4 days out of a year rather than 300 days out of a year.

Later…

Jesus, I’ve been up for 22 hours! When am I gonna fall asleep? I think part of it is cuz I’m so psyched for Andy to get the fuck out tomorrow morning. Wait till the people he rents from finds out he doesn’t do chores and he breaks things. Or tries to when he isn’t getting his way. Wait till he himself finds out our friendship is over.

THURSDAY, JANUARY 17, 1991 Well, in an hour I’ll have gone 72 hours without smoking. The reality of it all still hasn’t quite hit me, but everything’s gone just as I predicted. Just like with the Navane and other things I’ve predicted how, why and when they’d happen. Some predictions, for example, with the Navane and smoking I predicted 3 or 4 years before it happened. Before I quit, I mean. I could see how it was gonna happen too, and why.

Later…

Am I ever psyched for Andy to get the hell out! He’s supposed to move this Saturday to rent a room on Dickinson. Yeah sure, but I’m like, get this wacko outa here! Andy never really was a true friend. Not in all ways, but in some ways. The reason I’m running around calling him a liar about this and that so much lately is cuz he’s done it so much to me. He can’t take his best friend’s word for anything so now he’s seeing how he likes it. Why would I, or any other 25-year-old need to lie? I’m not a child who has to fear punishment if the truth is told.

I cannot wait till he’s outa here and I will never ever let myself get into this situation again. I, of course, should’ve known better with a person like Andy. Or his type. Andy just freaks over anything and everything. I know plenty of other people who I have much less in common with but could live with them so much easier. However, I never will live with anyone again. That’s how I felt before Andy moved in so I sure as hell won’t change my mind about that now. He has lived here for almost a month.

Later…

The last sentence got cut off cuz Andy and I started talking. We also played the piano and sang. I still say, though, that yes he has a lot of good qualities, and yes we have a lot in common, but God he can be an asshole!

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 16, 1991 While I’m waiting for Martha I can tell you how well I woke up. It was 5am and fucking Andy asked me to wake him up at 7:00. I told him to set his alarm in case I fell asleep and I did. I then woke up briefly at 9am. The next thing I know, the little fuck is saying, “Hey! Hey! Don’t you have an appointment?”

It was 1:15 PM and my alarm had another 45 minutes to go. I wanted to kill him! Then the little fuck goes, “Thanks for waking me up.”

I told him it’s not my fucking responsibility to get him up. I also set his alarm and he said it didn’t work so he took his anger and frustration out on me by waking me up. Then the immature brat plays the answering machine messages back loudly, stomps his feet and sings at the top of his lungs. Is this guy ever going to grow up?

His favorite show had 20 more minutes to go when he left, and I had had it with his bullshit, so I stopped the VCR from recording.

He’s got two days to get the fuck out.

As for the good news and yes, believe it or not, there is good news. Very, very, very good news. I have not smoked since January 14th!!! No, I do not feel like I want one!!!!!

Later…

I let it all out in therapy today. About how despite the fact that there’s a lot of good in Andy, he’s also an immature, spiteful, selfish little boy who only will hear what he wants to hear. And how he’s got to either condemn or make someone miserable in some way when things in life aren’t going the way he wants.

He’s over crying on Brenda and Bonny’s shoulder now as he’s not man enough to face me. Like last night when he said how his mother said it was wrong for him to go to Brenda. I simply said, “Andy, you’re gonna do what you’re gonna do, believe what you want to believe, say what you want to say, and hear what you want to hear.”

He’s a wimp and even though he’s turned Brenda, Bonny and Steve against me, I know they’re really fed up with him crying on their shoulders and needing a babysitter. Of course, God help someone if they should be upset or sick and go cry on HIS shoulder.

SUNDAY, JANUARY 13, 1991 Well, I’m still feeling like shit, unfortunately. There’s no feeling worse than wanting to pick yourself up, be happy, be productive, but you just can’t. My asthma’s killing me and I’m still under mega-stress. Way more so than I’ve been in a long time. I mean, this has got to stop, but I feel helpless. Like I don’t know where to begin to help myself. It just isn’t always easy. I miss those days when I was productive non-stop and could physically bounce off the walls for endless hours. I was a dancer. Now I take two steps and my heart’s racing or I’m wheezing or both. I wanted to kill myself for getting so out of breath with only two bags of groceries to carry up. Two years ago I could’ve run up those stairs 20 times.

I still can’t stand having Andy here. Even if I lived with Brenda I’d go nuts, even though she’d be easier to live with cuz she’s more easygoing and calm compared to Andy.

Andy looked at a room on Mulberry St., but I’m afraid he’ll be here much longer than I can stand. Andy and I will remain friends, but I may move to CT since there’s nothing for me here and Andy and I will save money and then maybe move to PHX.

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 9, 1991 It started to snow a few hours ago so I was off by one day but that’s still close.

Right now I’m listening to Andy, Fran, Tracy and Raven make prank phone calls. Raven was in the lip sync contest and never won. She was a pitiful drag queen and literally froze on stage, but seems to be a nice person. Fran’s taken him in for a month till he gets a job. Well, like Tracy said, Fran’s good for taking people off the streets.

Last night was a hell of a night. I had a severe migraine and was crying for hours in bed till I finally threw up twice. Of course, Andy didn’t give a fuck and I knew it so I held it in and suppressed the urge to scream out. I needed someone so badly last night. Well, I had to puke instead cuz Andy would’ve freaked if I woke him up. Plus, he’d rather make me feel worse than better. I get shit on whether I speak positive or negative about myself. The guy who’s supposed to be my best friend’s busy turning my friends against me and constantly talking shit to Brenda, Bonny, Steve, you name it. He said, both to me and others, more negative shit about me than positive.

I’ll write more later since all I have to talk to is this book unless I hold it in till I puke. But puking is better than trashing things, though I can’t believe I didn’t. Reaching out to people and communicating with them only gets me in trouble and misunderstood so I’d rather puke and lose weight.

MONDAY, JANUARY 7, 1991 Well, it didn’t snow today like I felt it would, but they say it may snow Wednesday.

I met this really nice nurse named Kim at Baystate ER. She’s super nice, open-minded, and the type you feel you’ve known for years the second you meet her.

She was on her way home when I was standing outside the ER entrance when I saw The Joy of Signing book in her hand and we took it from there. It turns out that we have a lot in common and I’m giving her sign language lessons. We’ve met 3 times so far and today she took me to Valley’s for baked stuffed shrimp in exchange for me to teach her sign language. However, she really is doing me a favor too, by giving me a chance to use my sign language and to keep on top of it.

Later…

From now on I must learn to be my own therapist. I shall try to discuss as much as I can about my feelings with myself or write them in this book. I always admired myself for being able to speak my mind but now I find it’s better to keep my mouth shut most of the time. Communication only starts fights and arguments. People often misunderstand the things I say and do and take me the wrong way so what’s the use? I’m gonna just start going along with as much as I can except for things like sex with an ugly woman or a man. I want to learn to talk less and be able to cheer my own self up when I’m depressed or sick as independently as I can.

I’m really proud of myself for last night. I had a massive asthma attack and I was terrified. I mean fucking terrified. I was crying tears like a leaky faucet, but I didn’t wimp out to anyone. I was about to dial 911 and say, “Look, it’s been hours that I’ve been trying to fight this off and I just can’t.” Yet even after being told at the ER what a risk it is to your heart and in other ways, I beat it on my own.

SATURDAY, JANUARY 5, 1991 I just took some decongestant medicine Brenda gave me and I'm so drowsy now.

TUESDAY, JANUARY 1, 1991 Age 25

New Year’s Eve sucked. First of all, Jimmy, downstairs, and I made a big mistake of picking up Fran and bringing him over. Fran embarrassed the shit out of Jimmy who had Mike and Lisa over. Mike and Lisa live next door in #11. Jimmy’s in #10 directly below me. He’s getting evicted which sucks. He turned out to be an ok neighbor. With my luck, some jackass will move in who’s the type that’ll freak if I have the stereo on the lowest volume.

Fran was drunk off his ass. He couldn’t stop playing with my hair, slapping me and Andy on our heads and he fucking raided the kitchen as if he hasn’t eaten in years. He’s not ever again coming over here.

Tracy was over tonight. She lost a lot of weight.

Andy and I had a huge fight and we shoved each other. Much later when we were calm we laughed about it, admitting we were glad we shoved each other to get our frustrations out.

I really do hate having a roommate and I explained to him that it’s gonna take some serious getting used to and adjusting. I’ve been alone so long and I do prefer it that way. 3 years or so ago I’d have jumped at the thought of having a roommate, but as I’ve gotten older, my desires have changed. Just like I really don’t care to be with a woman or to have a baby anymore. I do want to very occasionally have casual sex, but not with just anyone. I really wish someday I could have one night, just one night, with a woman I’m attracted to and I feel that spark with, rather than a woman who’s just ok. I know it won’t happen, though, and I accepted that a long time ago. Well, like I always said, better to fantasize about first best, rather than to settle for second best. Another reason that’s better about fantasy is that if the relationship is getting rocky, you can simply click it off and out of your mind. You certainly can’t do this in a real-life relationship.

[uselessundertalefacts]

Just thinking about how a situation like in this comic would come about and (talking about neutral ending angst)

Given the way people talk about their memories in canon I feel like there’d be a period of time where the gang comes to realize the significance of their feelings of deja vu and finds out they’re real memories and that would be a hell of a process I think

Like imagining Undyne waking up one morning and freaking out because it’s already 7am and her first class is at 7:30am and alphys is half-awake and is like “Huh what class?” “My gym class! Toriel’s gonna have my head!” “Undyne you work for Asgore???” And once Undyne’s convinced that she’s not actually a gym teacher, she’s like “agh sorry Alphys I guess I had a weird dream last night!!” and Alphys thinks back to her dream where toriel was the queen and Undyne was…. and mettaton…… she can’t remember? And it feels too specific to be a coincidence and Alphys knows the theory about multiple timelines so she has a crazy idea and calls up sans who just that morning went to feed his pet rock and was surprised to see that papyrus had already fed it and he’s got some thoughts about this. Meanwhile Undyne calls up asgore who is like “yeah I have vivid memories of killing the six humans who fell before Frisk and some of them don’t match up, and I have memories of killing Frisk, that’s normal.” and toriel is trying to work out why she can’t handle seeing frisk buttering their toast with a butter knife, and papyrus falls out of the habit of texting Undyne because he always subconsciously feels like he won’t get a response from her and

Eventually the truth comes out, Frisk confesses, and they’re forgiven of course because no one should EVER be in the situation they were in and the others are not exactly innocent from the sounds of it. And really, it’s not Frisk’s fault that they all betrayed each other when things got bad… and they all move forward. They all have dinner together that night and drink hot chocolate by the fire before going to sleep and they aren’t laughing or joking as much as usual but they tell embarrassing stories and long-winded jokes and just live in that moment which is so full of love despite everything

[purple-cat-demon]

Forever Starts Under the Ginkgo Tree Part 9

Pairing: Gavin x Hazel

Genre: 🔞Smut🔞 romantic/domestic fluff

Word Count: 4,714

Warnings: wet dream leading to actual sex, unprotected sex.

Beta by the lovely @sin-with-quiche

Dear GEEZUS, this has been a very long time coming and I have my finicky Muse to thank for that (the highly distractive little brat), but yes, this little saga is finally done after about 2 years in the making?? So I hope y'all enjoy the final instalment of Forever Starts Under the Ginkgo Tree~ 💙 thank you all who have been reading it and have been very patient for each instalment~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~Sunday 7:30am~~

"Wakey wakey, my love~" Hazel gently whispered in Gavin's ear. A soft moan came from her fiancé, still touring dream land.

"Ngh, how is it that you're awake before me," he shifted towards her, "and here I thought I wore you out last night."

In a swift move by her deft fiancé, Hazel was back on the bed and under him, playfully laughing as he snuggled into the crook of her neck. A hand had snuck up her pajama top and lightly fondled her breast, his fingers gently pinching an already hardening nipple.

“Mmm, how are you this frisky so early in the morning, my love," Hazel giggled

He smiled into her neck before kissing it.

“I could ask you the same thing,” he answered, nibbling her ear before trailing back down to her neck. Lifting his head, he leaned in for a kiss while his knee parted her legs enough for his hand to move downward. Hazel anticipated that delicious next move—

A few moments passed before Hazel opened her eyes to find Gavin had disappeared.

“Huh,” she sat up and looked around, her bleary gaze settling on the sleeping form of her fiancé next to her.

‘What the hell? That was a DREAM?!’

Silently waging war on her rudely overactive imagination, her small tantrum roused the officer from his sleep.

“Mm, what’s wrong, my love?”

“Nothing…,” she whimpered, thoroughly duped by her very convincing wet dream.

Gavin sat up, shifting closer to his visibly dejected bride-to-be and nuzzled into the back of her neck, taking in her scent.

“You sure nothing’s wrong," he wrapped his arms around her torso and rested his chin on her shoulder.

“Y-yeah, I just had a super realistic dream, that’s all," she shivered at his touch.

“Oh? And what was it about?"

Hazel felt her face get uncomfortably warm as she recalled the unfinished business of her lewd dream.

“W-well, I guess you could think of it as a continuation of our…session last night.”

“Is that right,” he inquired, mildly intrigued by this dream of hers. He glanced over at the clock on her nightstand, it read 6:56am, he then had an idea.

“Judging from your cute pout, I’d say this dream of yours was…unfinished?”

Hazel squeaked at his deduction, squirming in his embrace as one bold hand found itself in her pajama bottoms.

“Well then, I’m not sure if I should be jealous of your imagination or not but let’s fix this with the real deal, yeah?”

A whine came from her as he continued his explorations below, the light circular motion she felt on her clit made her knees draw upward, giving him more access.

“Nngh, w-wait…,” he stopped his actions, concerned that she may still be sore from last night.

She turned toward him, pushed him lightly onto his back, then hastily shedded her pajamas.

“Let me take care of you,” she purred while straddling his waist.

She shimmied down his legs, taking his pajama bottoms with her—Gavin stifled a giggle at the cute sight. With his help, Hazel freed him of his clothing then slowly crawled back up. He was almost fully erect, and with how wet she already was, she slid his length along her slick folds with ease.

Gavin bit back a moan, propping himself up on his elbows to get a better view of his bride-to-be. When she felt he was good and ready, she positioned his length at her entrance and slowly sank down. Both groaned at the contact; Hazel paused, adjusting to his fit, then slowly rocked and bounced in place. She leaned forward, her fingertips ghosting over his chest before flitting up to cup his face to kiss him. Gavin surprised her by wrapping his arms around her to deepen the kiss. The sudden movement made her legs jerk, causing her left knee to graze his wound. He hissed, abruptly breaking their kiss.

“Ah, I’m so sorry–my love,” she apologized profusely upon realizing what had happened.

“I’m fine, get back here,” he demanded, bringing her face back in for another kiss.

She carefully continued her movements, swallowing all the moans from her fiancé as that familiar build up approached quickly.

Gavin felt impatience take over as he shifted to sit up with Hazel still straddling him. Hazel moved to accommodate a more comfortable position for the injured officer, despite his grunts of protest. She jolted as Gavin snuck one hand down to tease her clit while the other firmly pressed on her back trying to close what little gap remained between them. Desperation in his actions as if she were only a dream that would disappear the moment he lets go.

Taking the small chance of possibly hurting his side, he started to buck into her, inadvertently slowing down her movements.

“A-ah, babe…hah, I’m—,” his warning cut off as he tensed up, spilling into her. Hazel quickly followed with her own release as she clutched onto him, biting his shoulder to muffle the scream that threatened to wake their only bungalow neighbor.

A pained grunt came from the spent officer, she had bit a little too hard but not enough to draw blood.

“Why do I feel like I’ve hurt you more than pleasured you,” she panted out, still coming down from her blissful high.

A small chuckle filled her ears as he tightened his embrace.

“It’s fine, it wasn’t intentional,” he paused, “or maybe, the bite was intentional?”

Hazel wanted to crawl under a rock from the embarrassment she felt; she didn’t realize biting was part of her intimate repertoire, though Gavin didn’t seem to mind it.

‘Maybe he’s into it??’

“You okay, Pumpkin?”

She must have zoned out for too long, concerning her fiancé; she blinked back into the present.

“Yes, sorry, I spaced out for a moment there,” she pressed her forehead to his, content in the intimacy they shared.

“Hmm, what time is it,” he asked.

Hazel glanced over at the clock, “8:07, should we get ready?”

“Actually,” he caressed her face, “I was thinking we could relax in the hot spring tub before heading out for breakfast.”

Her eyes lit up, she was all for getting their money’s worth out of that private hot spring.

“That’s a great idea! I was thinking about that too, but right before we leave for Loveland so we could be more relaxed on the train ride.”

“We could do that too, if you still want to.”

She eagerly nodded, that amenity definitely made her sleep better, among other things.

Gavin reached for the tissues on the nightstand but Hazel was faster. She gently lifted herself off his lap as he cleaned them both before anything got on the sheets. He headed to the outdoor shower first as Hazel started filling the tub; she then walked over to her fiancé, giggling as she threw her arms around him and swayed.

“Thank you so much for all of this. I’m excited for the next step.”

“You’re more than welcome,” he said, kissing her forehead, “and so am I.”

The brisk morning air cut through them as they went to check on the water level in the tub.

“Mm, almost full,” Gavin observed, he then noticed Hazel shivering a little from the cold.

“Let me return the favor,” he said, hugging her from behind. As he rested his chin on the top of her head, he felt just how cold her wet hair really was. He immediately brought a hand up to dry her hair before she caught a cold.

“Ahhh…,” Hazel, so thoroughly content with the warm, gentle breeze swirling around her, she nearly forgot to keep an eye on the tub filling.

Luckily, Gavin was paying attention while he dried her hair; he gave a small nudge to let her know it was full.

“Ah, yes, got it,” she left his warm embrace to turn the water off, then gestured to Gavin to go in.

“After you, my love~”

He nodded with a small smirk as he stepped into the tub; his hand extended out to help her get in. Finally adjusting to the heat, Hazel sat down, letting out a pleasant sigh as she settled in next to Gavin.

“Oh crap, I forgot the candle,” she got up to go retrieve the neglected piece of aromatherapy.

“Leave it, come back here,” Gavin reached out, slipping his arms around her waist, and planting a kiss on her back, “I just want to enjoy this moment with you, no candle needed.”

She happily settled back into his embrace, sinking into the safety of his very being.

Two hours passed as they relaxed in the comfort of each other’s company. Hazel held up her left hand, admiring the delicate new addition. Flipping her hand over warranted a small gasp, it was quite pruney, a clear indication that it was time to get out.

“Do you want to go back to the cafe from yesterday or try something new,” her fiancé inquired as they got out of the tub.

“Hm, I kinda wanted to try their French toast, but if you want to try someplace new, I don’t mind.”

He mulled over the options for a bit.

“I’ll figure it out while you get ready,” he ultimately decided on a surprise choice.

“Okay,” she chirped, bounding away to the bathroom to get ready.

Gavin rummaged through his duffel for an outfit, while scrolling around for another place to try. He found a couple of places near the hotel that boasted some glowing reviews; the food looked delicious in the pictures that previous patrons had taken, but which cafe would be the best choice?

One cafe offered some similar style French toasts like the cafe from yesterday, whereas the second choice did not. He quickly debated between the two, finally settling on Sweet Break Cafe, just a two minute walk from the hotel.

“I picked a place,” he said as Hazel came out of the bathroom.

“Oh? Do I get to know where we are going or is it a surprise?” She cuddled up to him, gently squeezing his bicep.

“It’s a surprise,” he chuckled, placing a kiss on her temple.

“All right then, I better get dressed, the bathroom's all yours now.”

“Got it,” he reluctantly shuffled out of her embrace to finish getting ready.

As soon as they exited the hotel, they turned right and walked the two minutes right to a seemingly busy cafe.

“Sweet Break Cafe, sounds cute,” she commented, seeing the lettering on the front window. For a Sunday morning, this particular cafe had only a few patrons partaking in breakfast. A stark contrast to the line outside waiting at their apparent To-Go window.

Walking through the cozy setting, natural sunlight filtered in from the skylight panels that ran along the center of the ceiling. The building’s load bearing beams were painted a brilliant white, as well as the brick walls to give the illusion of a more open space. The more striking features of this interior were the vines that crawled up one wall via chicken wire and plants that hung above the seating areas on the opposite wall. The plant tendrils were kept trimmed to avoid contact with a patron’s head. Metallic dandelion fluff lights provided overhead lighting for each of the tables lining the walls. As for the picnic style bench seating in the middle of the cafe, two large flower-like ceiling fans provided a gentle airflow for the group seated beneath them.

The host sat the couple along the wall with the creeping vines. The small breeze generated by the center fans made the leaves sway and flutter.

“This is a pleasant surprise, I like the atmosphere here,” Hazel marveled, inhaling the fresh scent of the plants.

“I’m glad, I did see that they have similar french toasts here, part of the reason why I chose this place.”

“They do?” Her demeanor brightened even more, “what was the other part of the reason?”

“I thought it looked nice in the pictures, something different, you know?”

She nodded sweetly, the knowledge of the cafe having the very breakfast she wanted to try helped with her decision, or so she thought.

That decision wavered once they were given menus, there were so many mouth watering options other than the french toasts. From fluffy omelets to huge breakfast burritos, this cafe offered up quite a variety; ultimately she went with her first choice, though now the challenge of figuring out which flavor to get had presented itself.

“This is different, a corned beef, potato and cheddar cheese omelet,” Gavin pointed out a picture of a sumptuously plated omelet paired with spring greens and two pieces of toast.

“That does look tasty, are you ordering that?”

“I just might,” he said, taking one last flip through the menu.

“I’m gonna get this,” she pointed to the double cinnamon french toast.

“Sounds good, what are you getting to drink?”

Hazel skimmed over the beverage section, zeroing in on the milk tea option.

“Milk tea~”

Gavin chuckled, somehow he knew she’d pick that after seeing it offered on the menu himself, though he did love that about her, the predictability. Not that she was always predictable but the little things that made her smile, he would continue to learn every single one of them.

After finishing their hearty breakfast, the next mission to be completed was for Hazel to find some souvenirs for her coworkers. There were a couple of stores just across the street near the candle shop that housed cute knick knacks, some even with the giant ginkgo tree on them.

“Are you gonna get anything for your coworkers,” Hazel asked her fiancé, who seemed to be lost in thought at the moment while he idly toyed with a miniature windmill.

“Hm? Oh, uh, maybe,” his gaze falling upon a box of honey flavored cookies, “these will do for Loveland PD and the STF.”

He picked up two boxes of the ginkgo leaf shaped cookies, though his expression seemed less than content.

“Are you okay, my love,” Hazel nudged close to Gavin, “is your wound bothering you?”

Gavin blinked in confusion and the worried look on his fiancé’s face made him panic.

“N-no, I’m okay, I didn’t mean to worry you,” he replied in a hushed tone, gently taking her hand to his lips for a light kiss; a gesture that caught his lovely fiancé off guard.

“If you’re sure,” she flustered, nearly dropping her shopping basket, in silent awe over the duality of this man—now soon to be husband.

Husband

Hazel knew she would get married someday and, honestly, ever since Gavin came back into her life, she secretly hoped he’d be the one to propose. Though now that he has, the fact that the next step involved the actual ceremony—well, Hazel felt a bit overwhelmed, for now came the downhill snowball effect of planning such an event. Soon her expression matched Gavin’s previously out of focus one.

“I think I found some souvenirs that Kiki and Willow would like over here,” Gavin broke her inane look and derailed that nerve wracking train of thought. She rushed over to the shelving unit that Gavin currently stood in front of, perusing the puzzle boxes on display.

“Willow for sure would like the puzzle box, Kiki might get bored of it after a while,” Hazel scanned the shelves to find something for her younger coworker. A needle felted bear holding a metal ginkgo leaf as an umbrella caught her eye.

“This is perfect,” Hazel picked up the item, “I know she likes bears, they remind her of Kiro.”

“Is that right,” Gavin’s voice trailed off as they walked up to the cashier. He recalled Hazel being the recipient of such bear themed gifts on her birthday and Christmas from her idol friend.

They exited the store and just window shopped the rest of the shops along the boulevard. Passing a quaint wedding boutique, Hazel stopped; she saw a mermaid style dress nestled between an a-line princess style and a poofy ball gown. The mermaid dress had a ruched top instead of the lacy bodice she saw back home.

Gavin wrapped his free arm around Hazel’s waist and lightly kissed the side of her head .

“You okay, Pumpkin? You’ve been quiet since we left the souvenir shop.”

Hazel sighed and leaned into him, she knew this planning would take time but for some reason she couldn’t shake her apprehension at the moment. Why was she scared?

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me…”

“There’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you, my love. This is a big step for us, making it official and all.”

“Yeah, I get it,” she took his free hand in hers and lovingly squeezed it, “I do feel better. Just take it one step at a time, right?”

“Exactly. So how about we go back to the hotel, we’ll take one last soak in the hot tub, grab some dinner then head home?”

“That sounds nice, yes, let’s do that,” she nodded firmly and kissed him on the lips.

Hazel gathered the clothing that had been strewn around the room and proceeded to pack their duffels, while Gavin started the water to fill the tub. She briefly caught a melancholic expression before he switched it to a happier one when she entered the room

“Hm, there’s still something bothering you, isn’t there, my love,” she reached to cup his face; he melted into her touch and sighed.

“There are… some things I’m concerned about for the wedding planning, particularly the date.”

Hazel had an inkling as to why he was worried and it was those three pesky letters that seem to throw a wrench in a lot of their time together; the STF. While she did admire the fact that he had such a strong sense of duty, she also felt like her fiancé forgot that he was made of flesh and bone.

“There’s no guarantee that I won’t be called in for a mission,” his brows furrowed, “I was fortunate for this weekend despite still being called away. We might not be so lucky next time.”

“I figured that’s what it was, it crossed my mind too, which is why I thought maybe we could do a civil wedding ceremony and then try to plan a reception later?”

“That’s one option,” Gavin nodded, pondering over the plausibility of that idea, “but I also want you to have the wedding you deserve.”

He led them to the little cedar bench that jutted out of the wall and sat down; Hazel laced her fingers with his as she leaned on his shoulder.

“What other things are you worried about?”

Gavin sighed heavily into the side of her head.

“I guess the date was the only thing, really,” he replied, “well, maybe the venue for the reception. I think everything else can be dealt with as we go.”

Hazel shifted herself to look him in the eyes—maybe it was the newly engaged bliss still in effect but she felt even more love for this man. With all they had been through up to this point, planning a wedding should be a breeze—that’s what Hazel hoped, anyway.

“Ah, let me go check on the water,” she bolted up from the bench and scurried over to the edge of the tub, it was nearly full.

“Almost done,” she looked back at Gavin, who promptly stood up, taking his shirt off while walking over to her. She noticed his wound looking much better without the bandage as she lightly ran her fingers over it. He didn’t even flinch at her touch, he was too busy tugging on the hem of her top in silent eagerness before slowly pulling it over her head and tossing it toward the bench to join his. Hazel took to his belt buckle while he awkwardly fumbled with her bra clasps.

“I really hate these things,” he grumbled.

“Here, switch,” she giggled at his disgruntled look as he glumly finished what she had started. She quickly peeled off her leggings, panties following suit, both landing in a pile with Gavin’s pants and boxers. When she turned around, Gavin had already turned the water off, his hand extended out to help her in.

Time passed in quiet conversations with pauses of silence sprinkled in between. They happily bounced wedding ideas off of each other, some good, some really bad.

“I actually wouldn’t mind wearing the kind of dress I had for the Fairytale Wedding shoot we did. Though I wonder if that design went out of season since then,” she mused as she got out of the tub.

“You looked really pretty in that one but I think any dress would look gorgeous on you,” he added, following behind her.

“Even a burlap sack dress?” She couldn’t help herself, she had to know if what he said rang true.

“Uh, sure, you could make that look gorgeous too,” he replied, very puzzled at such an idea, but if that's what she desired, he’d make it work.

“I’m just kidding, my love, no burlap sack dress,” she teased. Thankfully she didn’t see the visible look of relief on his face as he dried her hair.

“I could just bring a picture of the dress to a bridal shop to see if they have a similar design,” she pointed out as Gavin continued to dry them both off.

“Hmm, true. You could always see about getting it custom made too, it's a shame you couldn’t keep that dress…”

Gavin hugged her naked form from behind, resting his chin on her shoulder. A warm breeze wrapped around them; he gave her a peck on the cheek before pulling away to get dressed. Hazel followed behind and gently pinched his left side, startling him—the surprised yelp from him made her giggle hysterically. He quickly turned around, dropping the clothes he had already gathered and launched a tickle attack on his bride-to-be. The onslaught went on until Hazel yielded a breathless surrender.

“Seriously, I’m no match for you…,” Hazel wheezed, still out of breath.

Gavin chuckled, pulling her back into his arms—she flinched, adopting a defensive stance, well, as much as she could in her still nude form.

“Truce,” Hazel pleaded, looking up at him with her doe eyes, hoping this wasn’t some sneaky tactic to tickle her more.

“Truce,” he said, “now let’s get dressed, yeah?”

“Yes~”

They finished packing up their duffels and checked out of the hotel.

“Do you want to eat at the noodle place again,” Gavin asked as they exited the hotel lobby, nudging his duffel in the direction of said restaurant.

“Hmm, I’m still a little full from our late breakfast. I’m good with getting something from the convenience store at the train station, if that’s okay with you?”

“Sure, Pumpkin,” he put his arm around her as they walked to the station. “You sure you’re done shopping around? We’re gonna be getting back to Loveland City a little earlier than planned.”

“Yup! This weekend was so perfect, but now I can’t wait to go home and get started with the wedding plans,” Hazel eagerly bounced in place.

“Okay,” he smiled, knowing those preparations would be in the back of his mind as well.

It was well into the afternoon when they reached their platform for the return trip home. A small convenience kiosk was situated in the middle of the waiting area; Hazel perused the products they offered, her gaze falling on a crustless peanut butter sandwich. She grabbed that and a bottle of water; Gavin had picked out a chicken cutlet sandwich and a bottle of barley tea.

Their train pulled up just as they finished their food and drinks; a discernible ‘whoosh’ was heard above the mingling conversations as the doors opened to welcome passengers in.

Settling into their seats, Hazel saw the rich, warm glow of the fading day with the city slowly lighting up for the night. A wonderful atmosphere to end an equally wonderful weekend.

“Are you gonna sleep on the way back,” Gavin asked, noticing Hazel futilely stifling a yawn.

“Mm, I’m trying not to—I wanna start brainstorming more wedding ideas,” a small pout graced her lips, “but I have a feeling I’m going to knock out whether I want to or not.”

She yawned again, now feeling defeated, she gave up and leaned against Gavin’s shoulder.

‘That didn’t last long,’ he mentally mused, a gentle smile tugging at the corners of his lips. He set an alarm on his phone and placed his ear buds in to get at least one hour of sleep before arriving at Loveland Station.

Upon arriving at Loveland Station, they were greeted by both Kiki and Willow. Hazel had texted them just before getting on the train, though she did not expect to see them this quickly.

“Boss!” They both yelled excitedly as they hurried over to the newly engaged couple, hugging them both.

Willow pawed at Hazel’s left hand, admiring the ring adorning it.

“Oh wow, that picture you posted did not do it justice, this is gorgeous,” she marveled.

“About time, Officer,” Kiki said in a hushed tone, lightly elbowing Gavin’s arm. He couldn’t really retort, this proposal was a long time coming.

“What are you two doing here, anyway,” Hazel asked her two coworkers, “I was just letting you know we were on our way home.”

The two young women looked at each other, deviously; Hazel had just noticed the small bag in Kiki’s hand.

“Well,” they both started, Willow continued, “ we wanted to be the first to congratulate you two in person, and,” she motioned to Kiki to give Hazel the small bag, “to give you this in celebration of your engagement.”

There was a sly tone in Willow’s voice that made Hazel cock an eyebrow at her coworker.

“And on that note,” Kiki piped up, “we’ll take our leave. See ya tomorrow, Boss!”

The two coworkers bounded off leaving a slightly confused Hazel and Gavin behind.

“That was…interesting,” Gavin described that encounter the best he could.

“Y-yeah, let’s head home, my love,” Hazel said, taking his hand back into hers.

Hazel plopped onto the edge of the bed after they got home, staring at the small bag. Gavin had mentioned something about ordering take out and getting more groceries in the morning before work. She was super curious about the gift Willow and Kiki had given them; she quickly realized why they chose to give it to them now and not at work tomorrow. Her face reddened as she pulled out a short mesh dress, if one could even qualify this as a dress, in a rich cobalt blue color with a ruffled hem.

‘WHAT WERE THEY THINKING,’ she mentally exclaimed, oh she knew those two were bold, but this? This was a whole new level.

Embarrassment was her initial reaction, but the more Hazel looked at the lingerie, the more she wanted to try it on. She hastily changed out of her clothes and into the skimpy pieces of material, paling at the pair of matching crotchless panties that were included—she then called Gavin into the bedroom. He got up from the couch and walked down the hallway to their bedroom, eyes focused on his phone as he started ordering food for delivery.

“I’m ordering food for us, wh—,” he didn’t finish his inquiry as his jaw dropped at the sight of Hazel in sexy garments.

“Is that…what they got us,” Gavin asked, his expression now matching her initial one; Hazel nodded, fidgeting under his gaze.

He canceled the food order and placed the phone on the dresser.

“Guess dinner's gonna have to wait a little longer, I’m not letting this opportunity go to waste,” he purred, now looming over her as she scooted back to let him on the bed. He had a mischievous glint in his eyes as he spied the crotchless panties; easy access, no less.

It would appear it was going to be a rather late night for the both of them, but tomorrow would bring a new day, and the beginning of the next chapter in their lives, for it was now time to plan a wedding.

[missymurphy1985]

There's Something About Kate (Cillian Murphy X fem!OC) - Part Twelve

Warning - angst

More Here

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @peakyciills @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @peaky-cillian @misselsbells06 @datewithgianni @heidimoreton @jardinsecos @bitchwhytho @gypsy-girl-08 @queenofkings1212 @look-at-the-soul

Six Months Later....

Cillian's plane touched down at Heathrow at exactly 7:30am, and he headed into the terminal. Scarf around his neck, sunglasses on, the last thing he wanted was to be recognised after a night of no sleep. Pulling his suitcase off the carousel, he made a quick call to Paddy's checking in before making his way to his waiting car.

Arriving at the house in South London, he could see his costars in the living room window drinking coffee and watching TV. Game face on, he kept reminding himself that this was a good thing. He wanted this.

He needed this.

Chris was the first to greet him as he walked into the house, shaking his hand and offering him a coffee which Cillian accepted, gratefully.

Once he'd unpacked, he sat on his bed and ran his fingers through his hair. Longer than he usually wore it, it hung around his neck and eyes now, ready for his first role since... Since then.

He called Paddy again, and the brothers talked for a few minutes about the upcoming Liverpool game that weekend.

"Cillian?" A woman's voice interrupted the conversation, followed a gentle tap on the door. He looked up and smiled, inviting her in with a wave of his hand.

"Rose, right?" He mouthed.

"Yeah - just came to say hi?" She whispered, and gave him a warm smile handing him his coffee.

"Sorry, I was coming down for that," he laughed.

"No worries. Let me know if you need anything, I'm in the room next door." She squeezed his arm and left him to it, a shy glance over her shoulder as she closed the door behind her.

"Someone sounds happy you're back at work," Paddy grinned on the other end of the phone.

"What do you mean?"

"Making it known she's in the room next door already huh? She hot?"

"I'm not interested."

"I give it a week."

"Pad!"

"Seriously Cill, she's into you."

"How can you tell that through the phone you tit, she's just being friendly."

Paddy just laughed before he ended the call to head off to work. Cillian shook his head and fell back on the bed, psyching himself up to go downstairs and mingle with the others.

"I'm really pleased you're here, Cill," Danny Boyle, the movie's director, was sat with him in the breakout area later that week after the first scenes had been shot.

"It's weird being back, but in a good way. It feels right, you know? The right time to get back into it. And you know I never refuse you."

"How is everything back home? Ava must be nearly 10?"

"Not far off. She's feisty, that girl."

"Like her mum?" Danny smiled, and Cillian grinned, nodding.

"She's a carbon copy man. It's terrifying," he laughed, leaning back in his chair.

"Weren't you seeing someone too?"

"Not anymore," Cillian sighed, losing eye contact with Danny and looking at the floor. Danny patted his shoulder and headed off towards the lighting rigs.

He'd tried so hard not to think about Kate. He found out not long after they parted ways that she'd moved, but Nina wouldn't tell him where. He hadn't seen her in so long.. but she was there every time he closed his eyes. Every time he smelled Chanel No.5. Whenever he saw someone with the same hair colour and style. The same coat.

But he'd never find someone with those eyes. Those lips. That smile. That beautiful smile that would light up the darkest room. Those eyes that shone like diamonds when she laughed. Those lips that he should be kissing every night for the rest of his life if he hadn't been such a "monumental fuck up" as Paddy called him.

The chair next to Cillian was suddenly occupied again, an Australian accent cutting through the silence.

"So we're having a game night tonight, you in?" Rose asked, her eyes on his as he snapped out of his daydream.

"No, I think I'll have an early one..."

"Oh come on, you haven't had a proper drink with us since you got here! Plus I need a teamie. Everyone else has paired up already."

"I don't know..."

"Just an hour. Then you can head back upstairs to your book and I'll never nag you about joining us again."

"One hour?"

"Scouts honour." She fluttered her eyelashes at him pouting and he chuckled. Nodding his head in defeat, he signed himself for whatever game they had planned.

************************************************************

He woke the following morning with the hangover from hell, grateful that it was a day off and he wouldn't have to deal with 'people' while his brain felt like it was trying to evict itself through his skull. His mouth was drier than the desert, his eyes tried to recoil themselves back into his sockets... He hadn't drank that much in years. Couldn't remember the last hangover he had.

Climbing out of bed, he slid his jogging bottoms on and made his way down the hall to the bathroom. Chris caught his eye and smirked at him, giving him a sly nudge as he walked past.

Cliff did the same as he left his room too.

Cillian ignored them, locking the bathroom door behind him and violently threw up the tequila, lager and kebab he'd consumed the night before. Once he was sure there was nothing left in him, he drank cold water from the tap and washed his face. Decided bed would be his chosen location from the rest of the day, he skulked back to his room.

He sat on his bed and pulled his jogging bottoms back off, before a sudden movement under the covers made him jump.

Turning round, he froze.

Oh fuck....

[atsuwiee]

00:00 , the day ends | ii |

warnings: none a/n: last line was pretty cheesy

you didn’t go to bed right away after getting the call and you didn’t finish the show you were binging on. in all honesty, you didn’t know what to do. if now is the day you die then you’d tidy up your room, travel around the world, making cheesy letters for your friends— especially for jay. but right now, you were tidying up your room since you don’t have the money to travel the world.

after that, you sat in front of your desk getting some papers and pen, well if you’re going to leave the world at anytime of the moment then it’s time to write letters so they have a piece of you and your thoughts to hold on.

while writing you didn’t keep track of time, you had only looked at the clock in the middle of writing a letter. 4:48am, it’s been two hours since that call. some thoughts hit you here and there– especially about you going to hangout with jay later in the afternoon.

what if something happens? what if when you go out of this house you die on the spot?

you shake off your thoughts, “calm down, y/n, that won’t happen– you’ll probably die somewhere else” you say as you continue to write down the letter.

8:30am

the sky slowly changed its color and the sun was about to be up, you've had a nap for some hours, but you didn't feel well rested. you grab your phone to check the message notifications you have.

7:47am hee happy birthday y/n :p

hee we up for later?

8:31am you why r u awake so damn early?

hee couldn't sleep- so i pulled an all nighter

you "-_-anyways, yeah later at lunch, ok?

hee alright

10:10am

jake and sunghoon messaged you their birthday greetings and jay called you up to tell you he'll be picking you up later. you were still seated in front of your desk, putting the remaining letters in envelopes.

11:06am

you started getting ready but you were still nervous on what could happen. you sigh, shaking off the unwanted thoughts you had. then it got you thinking, should you go on and tell them you got the call?

12:11pm

jay picked you up and both of you were heading to the amusement park where you wanted to celebrate your birthday with them.

"hey, y/n? you're oddly quiet today, is there something wrong?" jay asked snapping you out from whatever you were thinking about. "huh? oh it's nothing" you say with a small smile. "really?" he asked to make sure. "yeah, yeah, nothing's wrong,” you tell him and he nods in response.

you just look at him as he drives and you wonder,

“if i told him right now that i’d be gone, what would he say?”

i | masterlist | iii

[keyofjetwolf]

Awaiting The Jewlet (or: Jet Wolf Screams Into Google Docs For Thirty-Five Hours)

Friday, 10:06pm: It happens tomorrow, I should go to sleep, it won’t happen right now but when it does happen I’ll wants to be rested, WHAT IF IT HAPPENS NOW THOUGH AND I’M ASLEEP. The fuck am I going to do even if it does? Go to sleep, you moron. I DON’T WANT TO SLEEP I’M TOO EXCITED THERE COULD BE JEWLET WHEN I WAKE UP. You weren’t even this bad when you believed in Santa Claus, my god. We’re going to bed, the end. BUT BUT BUT

Friday, 11:53pm: See, when I said “we’re going to bed” you were supposed to sleep. And now it’s too late to take a pot pill to knock me out. It is possible I did not plan this well. Meanwhile, also, constant: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (we will not speak of the concern this is the less fun portion of the program)

Saturday, 2:17am: Oh yeah, it’s gonna be that kind of night.

4:39am: EEEEEEEEEEEE

5:57am: CROISSANTGATE

6:41am: This is about as rested as I’m gonna get today, huh?

7:02am: IT BEGINS SO SOON

7:30am: EEEEEEEEEEEE 2: The EEEEEquel

8:03am: Well, what productive thing will I try in vain to pretend is occupying my attention today? Actually, I do need to finish that Xena essay. I can probably legit get absorbed for a little bit in all their deliciousness.

8:42am: ...which can only happen if I actually start working. OKAY OKAY FOCUS OKAY

8:49am: I’M GONNA BE AN AUNT TEDDY I WILL MEET JEWLET OMG OMG

8:52am: Oh good! Cindy gets to go in too! That’ll be so wonderful for Doc and her and everybody. I MEAN NOT ME BUT THIS ISN’T ABOUT ME ****I SUPPOSE****

9:39am: Everybody’s settled, nothing new to report, EXCEPT MY EXISTENTIAL SCREAMING. Oh, wait, that isn’t new either.

10:09am:  The baby wrapping paper I bought in a fit of nervous energy is ready for pick up! I cannot remember what styles I picked. Nor how many rolls. Welp, today is a day full of surprises!

11:12am: hrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn SO MANY EMOTIONS INSUFFICIENT WORDS (this is, coincidentally, both baby and essay related)

12:22pm: I have no idea how I managed to finish that thing, but I did, THANK YOU TINY BABY JESUS. Is it good? Is it coherent? NO IDEA BUT LET’S HOPE. Time now to go drown myself in menial tasks that require very little focus! My favourites!

1:48pm: Out running errands, find myself in the baby aisle, someone stop me. 

3:39pm: JEWLET COME THE FUCK ON

3:58pm: Doc having stronger contractions she’s actually going into labour Jewlet is starting to arrive oh shit omg oh shit oh shit omg it’s happening

4:17pm: This is EXCRUCIATING. Note to self: if Doc has another, kill Cindy and/or Jill.

5:23pm: Duolingo: Do you want to practice Spanish?!   Me: NO I WANT MY BABY YOU FEATHERED GREEN CUNT

6:07pm: WELL THIS BITCH ASKED ME FOR TWO THINGS AND I FINISHED ONE SO OFF TO CLEAN HER BATHTUB AND IF THIS ISN'T FRIENDSHIP WHAT THE FUCK IS I ASK YOU

6:23pm: Moderate labor! No nastiness needed yet! Come on, Jewlet, your papa's has such a rough go of it, give her this, please. 

7:15pm: WELL I GUESS NOW I JUST WAIT IS THAT WHAT WE'RE SAYING

9:12pm: Just got back from running a bunch of stuff up to everybody at the hospital. Jill recorded me passing a message to Doc. I got to call her a cuntstain, so that was pretty good.

9:41pm: Too late to take a pot pill? Probably. But exhausted all the same, so maybe I can sleep anyway. I guess it’s time to try. I WANT TO MEET YOU TOMORROW JEWLET AUNT TEDDY IS WAITING

10:02pm:  COME ON JEWLET I THINK I FIGURED OUT HOW TO KNIT THIS SOCK JUST FOR YOU oh wait this isn’t trying to sleep is it

1048pm: WATER BROKE SHE COMING SHE COMING HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP NOW AM I GLAD I DIDN'T TAKE A GUMMY OR NO I CAN'T TELL

1054pm: I'm losing my mind and the hospital is within walking distance of my house, I can't imagine how much I'd be climbing the walls if I were still in Portland right now.

Sunday, 4:44am: WE HAVE A BABY!!! 

4:50am: I can't believe I completely passed out through all the build up texts hahahaha wtf. BUT WE HAVE A BABY SHE'S HERE I HAVEN'T SEEN A PICTURE YET I HOPE I GET ONE SOON I BET DOC LOOKS LIKE A HOT MESS WE HAVE A BABY

4:53am: SHE IS IN WALKING DISTANCE OF ME AND I CAN'T GO SEE HER THIS IS AGONY

5:06am: There she is! Hello Jewlet! Oh man you inherited the shit out of Doc's nose hahaha

5:09am: I HOPE YOU ALL GET TO COME HOME TODAY

6:43am: Oh look at you. Look at you. 

7:09am: eeeeeeeeeee

8:07am: Well I just nearly forgot to put on a shirt today, so that's happening. 

8:28am: Got Erik the Rabbi all updated, Reeves has been fed, GOT A VIDEO FUCK OFF WITH THIS CUTE I NEED TO SEE HER, I need some coffee, and oh shit now tumblr knows I CAN SCREAM ALOUD

[heximagines]

Ambrose | Choose Your Own Adventure | 1A

{INTRO}  

YOU KEPT THE GUN

As you retreat back into your cab to grab a pair of boots and pull them on over your bare feet you eye your gun. Part of you wants to keep it close by just in case but you’d scared the poor guy enough already. After a moment you decide to keep the gun, he’ll just have to understand. You grab your backpack and shove your phone, charger, extra bullets, and a fresh bag of jerky in there. You think you’re all set so you grab your keys to lock up, but just as you’re about to leave one last item catches your eye. You grab it to shove into your bag before clicking the lock and slamming the door shut. You jog up to the strange man’s truck, when you climb in you can tell he’s a bit alarmed by the gun still being in your possession however he seems to brush it off well enough. “It should only take about 10 er 15 minutes to get there.” “Okay sounds good.” You’re a bit nervous to be alone with him but your hand tightened on your weapon and you remind yourself that he seems friendly. “I’m Lester, by the way.” “Oh! Yeah. Sorry, I swear I’m usually not this rude. I’m y/n.” Lester shrugs to himself. “No worries. I met much ruder people out here before.” He throws the truck in drive and sets off back up the road you’d been going down earlier. Your eyes peer out into the dark of the surrounding woods and you struggle to see anything past the tree line. Meanwhile Lester chews his lip nervously and begins to fiddle with the radio trying to get a signal to come in, finally the staticky signal clears up just enough to hear the twang of a country artist. “Oh!” Lester cranks it up. “Ya like Hank Williams Jr?” You give a half smile and shrug, “Can’t say I’ve heard him before.” Lester balks at you, “You ain’t never heard this song?” You lean in and attempt to decipher the crackly words. ‘Hey good lookin’, whatcha got cookin’? How’s about cookin’ somethin’ up with me.’  It sounds maybe a little familiar but nothing you can pinpoint. Lester looks a little disappointed but doesn’t push. Instead he turns it back down a pinch and continues on driving into the night. He drives for what felt almost like too long until the signal cuts out completely. As it does the glimmer of a street light lit up the road making you sit up in your seat. As the truck passes under it the cab is illuminated for just a moment and you turn to look at Lester. He seems much less scary now that you know there is something out here. Finally you roll past a big sign. ‘Welcome to Ambrose, Visit Trudy’s World Famous House of Wax!’ “World famous House of Wax huh?” Lester shifts uncomfortably and he gets an odd look on his face. “Yeah, nothin’ too special.” You giggle to yourself. “Not too special? It’s world famous!” At that Lester gives a little grin.

Once you drive a bit into town you’re greeted by a small gas station with a garage attached. Lester puts the truck in park before checking the time on the stereo. It’s 4:30am. You both shift awkwardly. Lester was pleasant enough to ride with and all but you just want your truck fixed and to get the hell out of there. You both climb out and Lester goes about lowering your truck off of the tow. You wrap your arms around yourself as you watch, trying to keep the now early morning chill from your skin when suddenly you’re startled by a loud voice just behind you. “Lester! What do ya think yer doin’ lettin’ yer friend freeze out here without a jacket?” Lester’s head shoots up and you turn around to see a handsome tall man approaching, you grip your gun just a little tighter as you size the man up. He’s dressed casually in jeans, a T-shirt, and a thick flannel. A faded blue cap covers his head of thick wavy brown hair. There’s a bit of stubble across his sharp jaw. “Oh, hey Bo. I wasn’t expectin’ ya to be up this early.” The man, Bo, pays Lester no mind as he approaches you, taking off his flannel he holds it out to you. You eye him warily and his eyes move down to your weapon. “Seems like you’ve had quite the night. No more need to worry now. Here.” He presses the flannel into your free hand and finally you slip the warm material over your shoulders and pull it around yourself. “Thanks. I appreciate it.” The man grinned down at you. “No problem at all.” He gestures towards your truck which Lester was still unhooking. “What seems to be the problem?” A sour look twists your face as you think back. “The fucking starter is shot. I ripped it out of a junk truck before I came out here and well, you know you get what you pay for.” Bo snorts and nods in agreement. “Well, shouldn’t be too hard to get fixed up. You just let me take a look at it.” Lester finally came to join the two of you with a smile. The men shake hands and Bo claps Lester on the shoulder. “You should go home and get some rest. I got this from here. Your friend is in good hands.” “Sounds good to me. Y/n, hope you make it to New Orleans safe.” Lester did turn out to be a pretty nice guy after all. “I think I’ll be good, thank you.” You give him a little wave as he makes his way back to the tow truck and pulls out of the gas station. Bo turns to you. “Y/n huh? That’s a fine name, I like it. Come with me.” He motions towards the gas station before walking ahead, leaving you to sling your bag over your shoulder and follow after him.

He unlocks the door and holds it open for you to enter. As you slip past you catch a whiff of his cologne, the same spicy scent that clung to his flannel, tinged with motor oil and something metallic that made your skin prickle. You glance at him to see he’s smiling at you, the corners of his eyes crinkling. He seems nice but something in your gut is telling you to keep your guard up. Just because a guy is good looking didn’t mean he was trustworthy. As you enter your eyes sweep across the fully stocked shelves. “Not a lot of business?” You look back at the man, he only shrugs at you. “It’s a small town, ain’t too hard to stay stocked.” You watch as he moves to lock the door and your nerves flair. “What are you doing?” His hand pauses and he looks over at you with that same friendly smile. “We don’t open until 7:30. Still a lil early.” You shift uncomfortably. “Well I’ll wait outside then.” Bo shakes his head. “You don’t gotta do that. Tell ya what. I’ll work on your truck with the garage open if it makes ya feel better.” You chew on that thought for a second before finally nodding. “Cool, I’ll wait out there while you open the garage then.” You slip past him and out the door, going to stand by your truck Lester had parked just outside the garage. Quietly Bo chuckles to himself and locks the door, you were going to be fun for him.

You’re still standing in place when Bo opens up the garage, a lit cigarette now dangling from his lips. “It’s gonna take some time, you wanna grab a seat?” Your eyes shift between Bo and the clock. The time was now 6am. With your sleep having been interrupted you wouldn’t mind a moment to rest. But you also had to leave as soon as your truck was done and you were afraid that if you slept now you’d be too groggy to drive later. “When does that wax museum open?” Bo perks up a bit at that. “Depends. The guy who makes all the figures keeps odd hours, so your guess is good as mine. You could go check it out if ya wanted. If it ain’t open now it probably will be soon. Doubt you’re allowed to bring that in though.” He gestures vaguely to your weapon with his cigarette. You give a short laugh and your face flushes a bit. “Can’t be too cautious these days.” Bo seems to nod in understanding. “Well it’s up to you, if you wanna stay then stay. You wanna go, museum is just up that way.” He points up the road. “Can’t miss it.” With that he sets off to get working on swapping out your starter. Your eyes rove over Bo’s broad shoulders before darting to the road just outside the shop.

GO TO THE WAX MUSEUM

Sounds like a good way to kill time

STAY AT THE GARAGE

Get some rest and talk with Bo    

[booksfromblackwood]

Is anyone still around in this fandom? If so, I thought I’d post the first chapter of an old fic that I re-wrote last year! Let me know if anyone’s still around, and if you’d be interested in reading more! Hope everyone reading this has a great day! :)

Han has left the chat.

Three Days Before The Disappearance

.Sam.Giddings. added josh_wash, ashleeeeey, xXGamerChrisXx, TheOriginalMatt, HanButterfly, BethWash, Mike_Munroe, EmilyD_, and _Jess.Riley_ to the chat.

.Sam.Giddings. named the chat Info For Tomorrow.

.Sam.Giddings.: Hey guys! Just to keep everyone updated on our travel plans for tomorrow! I know it's going to be a long day for everyone so it's vital we stick to the plan and stay in our groups where possible!

ashleeeeey: Okie-doodle!!

TheOriginalMatt: How are you so organised, Sam? You're a lifesaver!

HanButterfly: Hi!!

BethWash: trust sam to be more prepared than those of us organising the trip lol

xXGamerChrisXx: Since when was 'okie-doodle' a thing?

EmilyD_: Thanks Sam x

xXGamerChrisXx: And thanks so much, sam!

.Sam.Giddings.: So quick reminder of everyone's groups:

_Jess.Riley_: I'm stoked!!

ashleeeeey: That's rich coming from someone whose username is xXGamerChrisXx! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash, Chris, Matt, and myself will start the journey first tomorrow morning.

xXGamerChrisXx: You wound me!

Mike_Munroe: Thanks for the plan, Sam!

TheOriginalMatt: Excited to see everyone tomorrow! This is going to be a killer weekend for sure!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Em, Mike, and Jess, you guys are next.

ashleeeeey: You're so dramatic!! XD

Mike_Munroe: Team Two here we go!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Made you smile, though! ;-)

josh_wash: what about us

.Sam.Giddings.: I'm just getting to that!

ashleeeeey: True :)

xXGamerChrisXx: You guys are already there and are therefore irrelevant! :P

.Sam.Giddings.: Han, Beth, and Josh, you guys are there already!

josh_wash: thanks cochise i feel so appreciated

BethWash: lol thanks chris

Mike_Munroe: So, what are we all up to?

BethWash: i found cake

xXGamerChrisXx: Browsing reddit like a nerd XD

ashleeeeey: Listening to Sam's rundown of tomorrow unlike sOmE pEoPlE *coughcoughChris*

EmilyD_: Honestly just packing my final things with Jess. Mike's mostly watching the TV.

xXGamerChrisXx: :-(

.Sam.Giddings.: So, tonight we should all make sure our bags are packed and that we have our passports and tickets ready!! Set your alarms for the right times (depending on your group) and make sure to sleep early too (especially if you're in my group since tomorrow will be an early start for us)!

ashleeeeey: :)

TheOriginalMatt: 5am gang where we AT?

HanButterfly: Beth where are you rn? Because I want some of that cake!!

.Sam.Giddings.: So Team One (myself, Chris, Ash, and Matt), we need to be up by 5:00am and be ready by 5:30am for the taxi to the airport!! Matt and Chris, yours is going to be at Chris' place at 5:24 for some reason so make sure to be ready!!

BethWash: the lodge kitchen bcos where else would there be cake han lol

.Sam.Giddings.: We'll meet up at the airport when we arrive! Once we re-group, we'll check in, probably eat some breakfast whilst we wait, and then catch the 8:30 plane!!

TheOriginalMatt: Sweet!

ashleeeeey: Can't wait! :)

josh_wash: yo matt you surviving the puns

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two - you guys don't have to be up until around 9:00am since your taxi is at 9:20 and then your plane is at 11:30!

HanButterfly: Josh would you like me to save you some cake before we eat it all? :)

EmilyD_: We'll need a little longer than 20 minutes to all get ready but sure x

TheOriginalMatt: Just about! Myself and Chris have mostly been playing on his PS4 so I've been distracting myself with that! XD

josh_wash: yes please!

josh_wash: i feel for ya bro, a whole evening with chris' puns can prove fatal

josh_wash: you die of cringe

Mike_Munroe: Poor ol' Chris XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Once we arrive and get our bags, we need to catch the 2:30pm train and then the 4:20 bus! After that we have to take the 5:40 bus (I sent you guys screenshots of the route yesterday) and get off at Blackwood Pines ready for our hike up the mountain (with a little help from the cable car, of course)!

xXGamerChrisXx: I'm being BULLIED guys :(

ashleeeeey: Aw, poor Chris! :P

josh_wash: jk XD

TheOriginalMatt: I like how Sam's still here typing all we need to know whilst we're talking about cake and puns XD

.Sam.Giddings.: Team Two, you guys need to catch either the 5:30pm or the 6:00pm train depending on when your stuff arrives. After that you'll need to get the 7:50 bus and then the 8:40 bus to Blackwood Pines (you have to specify you want it to stop there or the driver won't stop) before you head up. Remember to lock the cable car station once you get in, Mike!

josh_wash: oh gosh tHE CAKE

Mike_Munroe: Gotcha' Sam!

HanButterfly: No worries, Josh! I managed to save most of it from Beth!

BethWash: rip my chance at a third slice of cake

_Jess.Riley_: Really, thanks Sam! We're all packed and ready to go! Xx

HanButterfly: It's really going to be such an awesome weekend! I can't wait :D

ashleeeeey: Thank you so much for inviting me! I've never been on something like this before!! :D

TheOriginalMatt: Yeah, thank you so much guys! I can't wait either, Han!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Have we got rooms sorted out for the lodge, guys?

BethWash: ash take the plans away from sam so she can have time to relax lol

EmilyD_: I'm with Mike in the room away from everyone like agreed right x

ashleeeeey: I'm trying but she won't let me! XD

HanButterfly: I mean if needs be we can sort out rooms once we're here! If not maybe we just sort out the first night rooms since it'll be fairly late when everyone arrives and then we can adjust them as needed as the trip goes on!

BethWash: lol poor sam will be up all night organising at this rate

.Sam.Giddings.: Sounds good, Han!

Mike_Munroe: Great idea, Hannah!

BethWash: em, yours and mike's room (upstairs guest) may not be ready first night so is it possible for you to share a room with jess til we get a chance to sort it out tomorrow?

EmilyD_: That's fine, hon. Thank you again for the trip and for letting us use the upstairs guest room x

josh_wash: how about for the first night emily and jess share beth's room and then beth sam and han go in hannah's room

josh_wash: mike can go to the small room downstairs if he's alright w/ that and matt can room w/ me

xXGamerChrisXx: Yo dude you forgot ash

ashleeeeey: It's alright, Chris! I can find somewhere!

EmilyD_: Ash you're honestly lovely but I'd kinda' like to be with either Jess or Mike if that's alright xx

ashleeeeey: No problem, Emily! I wouldn't want to intrude! :)

EmilyD_: Knew you'd understand xx

josh_wash: why dont you and ash share a room cochise

xXGamerChrisXx: I thought I was rooming with you and matt?

josh_wash: bro please just think for a minute here

ashleeeeey: I'm not sure.

xXGamerChrisXx: Beth, han, and sam, is there any room with you guys?

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry to be a bother!!

.Sam.Giddings.: Of course you can room with us, Ash! We'd love to have you with us! :)

BethWash: im with sam

HanButterfly: Of course!!

xXGamerChrisXx: Thank you to the only valid washington kids right now!

josh_wash: -_-

xXGamerChrisXx: I see what you're doing, josh. ha ha, we've had our laugh, now please stop before this weekend.

Mike_Munroe: Rough subject, huh?

josh_wash: bro chill you know i was just joking

ashleeeeey: I'm really sorry!! Please don't get upset with each other!

xXGamerChrisXx: No ash it's alright! i promise i'm not actually mad! :-)

josh_wash: he acts mad over text to get his point across but he literally just sits there with a blank expression irl XD

TheOriginalMatt: Is Sam still there, Ash? Haven't heard from her in a while!

TheOriginalMatt: Gotta check up on my plane buddy for tomorrow!!

_Jess.Riley_: Did you guys get window seats or middle isle seats? I got a middle isle and the others got a window!

BethWash: she hasn't drowned in her notes has she lol

TheOriginalMatt: We got two sets of window seats! Though I don't know which of us is actually going to be at the window and which one will be window isle!

ashleeeeey: She's just brushing her teeth! Her mom came in and brought us a load of vegan snacks for the trip tomorrow and now I'm even more excited!!

ashleeeeey: Speaking of which, I'm probably going to head to sleep in a minute! Though I'm not sure how much I'll actually get since I'm so excited!!! :)

xXGamerChrisXx: Sleep well, ash. see you in the morning :-)

ashleeeeey: Night, Chris :)

ashleeeeey has left the chat.

_Jess.Riley_: Well that was cute!

xXGamerChrisXx: People say goodnight to eachother! that's a normal human interaction!

_Jess.Riley_: You know full well it's cute when it's you two

.Sam.Giddings.: Ash told me she logged out so I came to say goodnight!

josh_wash: w/ jess on this one bro

HanButterfly: Goodnight, Sam!

BethWash: night sam!

josh_wash: dont let the bedbugs bite!

TheOriginalMatt: See you bright and early tomorrow!!

.Sam.Giddings.: See you at the airport/lodge, guys!

xXGamerChrisXx: Night!

.Sam.Giddings. has left the chat.

BethWash: its cute because you like eachother chris

xXGamerChrisXx has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Aww, don't tease the poor guy!

TheOriginalMatt: Chris says goodnight, as do I! Can't wait to see you all tomorrow!

BethWash: night guys!

TheOriginalMatt has left the chat.

josh_wash: night!

Mike_Munroe: Make sure to save me a slice of that cake, Han! I gtg!

Mike_Munroe has left the chat.

HanButterfly: Goodnight Mike :)

EmilyD_: We'd best be off too. See you all in the morning.

_Jess.Riley_: Night x

EmilyD_ has left the chat.

BethWash: night

HanButterfly: Goodnight x

josh_wash: night xxxxxxyzqvp

_Jess.Riley_: Ha ha, very funny. Get that one from Chris?

josh_wash: lol night

_Jess.Riley_ has left the chat.

BethWash: PLEASE can i have some more cake, han?

josh_wash: you guys can literally just talk if you wanted

HanButterfly: Nope! Gotta' save some for Mike~

BethWash: you wont shut up about that for the rest of the evening now, will you?

BethWash: lol

HanButterfly: :P

josh_wash: you guys gossip in the kitchen

josh_wash: imma head to bed

BethWash: night bro

HanButterfly: Sleep well!

josh_wash has left the chat.

BethWash: please?

HanButterfly: No :P

BethWash: ugh night sis

HanButterfly: Night, Beth! XD

BethWash has left the chat.

HanButterfly has left the chat.

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Ocean Eyes - Part 5

To say i didn't get much sleep last night was an understatement! I had spent a couple hours on the phone to my mom telling her about Chris showing up and now knowing about Mason while having a couple glasses of wine. When i finally did go to bed i couldn't switch my brain off,  the last time i had looked at the time it was nearly 4:30am and i knew Mason would be getting up around 6! It felt like i had just closed my eyes when that darling boy of mine came jumping on the bed to wake me up.

After breakfast we both got ready and headed out to the car, i needed to go to the store to get some groceries (if i had guests coming round i should really have something to offer them).

"Oh nooo.... mom creepy Brian is coming out" Mason said quietly.

"Sshhh i told you not to call him that" i chuckled as we rushed to get into the car before Brian could reach us.

"Thats what you and aunt Hannah call him though" he rolled his eyes like i was crazy as i reversed out of the drive.

"Only when we're inside where he can't hear us. You can't say that while his around baby"

"Fine, i wont say it again" he shrugged "is my dad coming back today?"

"He said he was gonna come see you today"

"I like him, he seems cool"

I didn't know what to say to that so i just kept my eyes on the road.

"Mom, dont you like my dad?...."

"Sure i do bud, i just haven't seen your dad in a long time"

"But he makes you sad"

"Im fine Mace, don't you worry" i forced a smiled trying to put on a brave face for him.

Walking around the store i found myself picking up things i knew Chris and Scott liked.... or at least what they used to like.

I was loading the bags into the car when i got a text message.

Chris: Hey, just checking its still okay if we come over today?

Y/N: Sure

Chris: Thats good because we're at the house but your not home....

Y/N: Im at the store, be back in 5 minutes

Chris: 👍🏻

A thumbs up?? Really Chris??

I internally face palmed, he was still a dork.

I spotted Chris's car parked out on the road leaving the drive way empty, once i had parked up he then drove up and parked behind me. Mason was already out the car and running over to see Chris before i even had my belt off!

I got out and walked around to the trunk to get the groceries out.

"Morning Neighbour" i heard Brian approaching.

"God damn it" i muttered under my breath before sticking my head around to see him "hi Brian"

"You need a hand with those bags Y/N?"

"No thanks i'm good, got plenty of help with these two" i threw a thumb back pointing towards Chris & Scott.

"You sure? i don't mind helping you out"

"Its fine, we've got it" Chris said coming to a stop beside me with Scott and Mason either side of him, he reached in and easily scooped up two bags, Scott grabbing the another.

"We're all good, thanks for the offer though"

"Anytime, you know where i am" he smiled and walked back to his house stopping a few times to look back.

"Urghh" i shivered "guy gives me the creeps" i muttered quietly as i shut the trunk and led the way up to the house.

"Is he always like that?" Scott asked his eyes going comically wide at the thought.

"Yeah. He always appears when we're leaving the house or getting back...."

"Thats a little weird"

"Im sure he's harmless...." i shrugged. Chris was being unusually quiet, I didn't ask him what his problem was.

"Mom and aunt Hannah call him creepy Brian but its a secret" Mason said quietly to Chris and Scott even though we were now safely inside.

"Mace, stop it" i laughed shaking my head.

"He can't hear me mom its fine"

"Honestly kid...."

"Wonder where he gets it from huh?" Scott chuckled at me.

"Definitely his dad" i rolled my eyes "i love him more than life itself but he's a pain my ass sometimes" i muttered quietly so Mason couldn't hear.

"Sounds just like Chris" Scott laughed playfully nudging my shoulder with his.

"I heard that!" Chris added just making Scott laugh louder.

I made some sandwiches for lunch and grabbed some drinks taking them all out into the garden where Chris and Scott were kicking a ball around with Mason.

"Foods ready guys" i called out to them once everything was laid out.

"Can i sit next to dad?" Mason asked running over.

"Sure bud, Scott looks like you stuck with me" i shrugged switching their plates around.

"Fine by me sweetheart, id rather sit next to you anyway"

"At least someone wants to sit with me" i joked sticking my tongue out at Mason making him giggle.

"Hey Y/N..?" I heard Brian call from behind me, i sighed closing my eyes before turning around to see him looking over the fence at us.

"Hey Brian, everything okay?"

"Oh yeah! I just wanted to remind you about the BBQ, your friends are more than welcome to join us too"

"Thanks for the invite Brian but i think we're just gonna have a quiet family lunch"

"Okay well if y'all change your mind just come on over"

"Will do" i forced a smiled and turned back around.

"Has he gone?" I whispered to Chris who had the clear view of next door.

"Yeah" he nodded "that guy needs to take a hint".

"I don't think he knows how to" i shook my head before taking a bite of my sandwich.

"Maybe you should give him a shot" Scott teased wiggling his eyebrows.

"No!" Both Chris and I said at the same time.

"Relax i was joking" Scott laughed before shooting Chris a look. Chris looked like he was about say something but his cell phone ringing his pocket drew his attention.

"Sorry i need to take this" he said getting up from the table "hey Lindsey" i heard him say as he walked further down the yard for some privacy.

"Lindsey? That the girlfriend?" I asked Scott quietly, he nodded giving me a sad smile "its fine, i just wondered"

"I don't think it'll last personally"

"He obviously feels differently if he's now wanting that divorce"

"Thats because he's an idiot"

"Not gonna argue with you on that....."

"So what about you? Anyone special in your life Y/N?"

"Yeah Mason" i scoffed "i don't have time for dating. Being a single parent is tough Scott.... most guys run a mile when they hear you have a kid..."

"But you must have dated a bit?"

"Not really" i shook my head feeling my face burn in embarrassment.

"Y/N, there has been someone since my brother right?"

I looked up at Scott slowly shaking my head "no. I've been on a couple dinner dates Hannah set me up on but nothing ever came of it" i shrugged "its fine".

"Jesus woman how long has it been....like 7 years??" He asked looking surprised.

"Something like that" i mumbled picking up my glass of water, my throat suddenly bone dry.

"Girl that is some dry spell, please tell me you at least have a vibrator!" He said quietly so Mason wouldn't hear. I choked on the water that i was swallowing and started coughing before it turned to laugher.

"God i've missed you Scott" i smiled at him.

"I've missed you too! But that doesn't answer my question".

"Whats so funny?" Chris asked as he rejoined us.

"Just Scott being Scott" i rolled my eyes.

"Im finished mom can we go play football again now?" Mason asked looking hopeful.

"In a little bit bud, your dad and Scott are still eating".

Hannah and Lucas turned up unannounced not long after lunch was finished and I was grateful for the distraction. Lucas quickly joined in with Mason, Chris and Scott who were kicking the ball around again while Hannah poured us both a glass of wine.

"So hows it been having him around again?" She asked looking over at Chris.

"Weird. But Mason loves it"

"Your handling it better than i would be!"

"Mason deserves to know his dad, Chris has already been warned that i'll kill him if he does anything to upset him"

"I don't doubt that for a second" she laughed refilling our glasses.

"So..... Friday? I was thinking we start small just hitting some bars then we can end the night at 'Ruby's' for some dancing. I know you need to be wasted before you even consider dancing"

"Han i said id go out for a few drinks not an all nighter!"

"Oh come on! You haven't had a good night out in forever babe, we'll find us some cute guys...."

"Hannah...." i groaned closing my eyes.

"Ooh i heard you mention cute guys" Scott sat down looking very interested in our conversation.

"Im trying to talk Y/N into finding a cute guy to give her some much needed attention when we go out Friday" Hannah told Scott making me roll my eyes.

"Id listen to Hannah, you are in some serious need of male attention"

"But i don't just hook up with strangers guys.... we've talked about this!"

"Well maybe you should! Im just saying you deserve to find someone who makes you happy Y/N. Just because your a mom now doesn't mean you can't find love" Hannah said reaching over taking my hand with a smile. She had a point.... i couldn't sit around waiting for a man who had made his feelings perfectly clear 7 years ago. A man who was in a serious relationship..... maybe it was time to try and move on from him.

"Can i please come with you? I could use a night out" Scott asked looking hopeful.

"Sure, its been a while since you joined us on a night out Scotty" i smiled at him.

"You can help me find this one a man while your at it" Hannah smirked and shared a look with Scott that spelt nothing but trouble.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @denisemarieangelina @mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie

[darie-zai]

Rintarou Suna birthday special~~~

Happy birthday Rintaro Suna <333!!!! 

a short fic about Suna’s birthday

-> rintarou suna x reader 

 You already had something planned for Suna’s birthday, it was a surpise birthday party for him and it was going to be at his house. Of course you had already talked to his mom regarding the preparations and you even had his little sister on board with it. First off you had to get some rest so you had enough energy for the whole day. 

                               ~timeskip to 6:30am~ 

It was morning and it was time for you to start off the day with your surprise, you had specially woken up early to go over to Suna’s house while he was still asleep. It was your morning surprise. You checked all the materials you had to bring, school bag and most importantly his present although you already got everything ready the night before and even checked everything multiple times, it didn’t hurt to check again one last time. 

Now you were on your way to Suna’s house, he didn’t live that far away from you just 5 houses down. When you reached his house, his sister was already waiting for you while jumping up and down. His sister adored you from the first time she met you so it was no surprise to see her so excited, you picked her up and went inside.

You proceeded to put your things aside and went straight for the kitchen greeting his mom who was already there. The plan was that you make his family breakfast and wake him up to come down and eat, while you and his mom made breakfast you both were discussing more about his surprise party. By the time you were done it was already 7:18 so you went to wake him up.

You softly knocked waiting for a response but it never came so you opened his slowly opened his door and there he was fast asleep with blanket only covering his lower half. Sitting on the edge of his bed you shook him slightly while calling out his name “ rin-kun wake up, breakfast is ready”

--suna’s pov-- 

I was in deep sleep until someone gently started shaking me, telling me to wake up and that breakfast is ready.

wait 

is that y/n’s voice ? but how ?

nah that can’t be her, i’m probably hearing things wrong

they still kept calling out my name, tho still a bit drowsy I slowly opened my eyes and I was blinded by the light wait is that an angel ? as my eyes started adjusting to the bright morning light I could see clearer on who was in front of me. Finally recognising the figure in my room I wrapped my arms around them and pulled them in bed with me “y/n.. why ?” 

--end of pov--

It took you by surprise when he pulled you in with him but you didn’t come here to go back to sleep. “hahahaha rin-kun first let’s get you out of bed and I’ll explain during breakfast, oh yeah I made breakfast with your mom so get your ass ready for school hmm” you gave him a quick peck on the cheek. 

“okay okay, the sweet talk ended so fast you meanie” suna pouted, he sneakily pecked you on the lips before running off to the bathroom. “hahaha I’ll wait for you downstairs and don’t take too much time!!” you shouted.

After Suna came down you told him it was a morning surprise for him, now you all were just eating with a few words in between, “oh happy birthday rin-kun :b” 

“and here I thought  you weren’t gonna greet me again, now now my present?” suna put his hand out waiting for you to give him his present.

“well... I didn’t have time to buy you a proper present but I was able to buy you a box of chuupet your favourite jelly sticks :D” 

“not what I was expecting but I’ll accept it only if you hang out with me after school” 

“of course that was my plan anyways” 

you both kept bickering for a little longer till his mom started ushering you both to hurry up or you’d be late. 

you said your goodbyes and headed to school. 

--school-- 

school went by as per normal, his teammates would greet him happy birthday during breaks. He surprisingly got some presents from some of his fangirls, not that you minded. 

--end of school--

School had ended and practice were over too, his team all had gone over to his house home and now you were just going over to a bakery to get his cake. Obviously you had told him that you bought him ordered him cake a few days ago to eat with his sister at his house, he seemed content with your excuse so you didn’t add more. 

Now you were just walking back to his house, you were holding hands, no words spoken just enjoying each other’s presence. 

You already texted his mom and the team that you would arrive in 10 or so minutes. 

“rin-kun I know your birthday hasn’t ended but how was it?” 

“it was amazing ‘cause you never left my side”

“cheesy much hahahahaha”

“oh we’re here” 

You allowed him to lead you to the door, you were excited to see his reaction and already had your phone ready behind his back. 

1 

*click*

2 

*creak*

3 

“SURPRISE!!”

“huh” 

“surprise rin-kun” you smiled at him

“y/n....” he pulled you into his arms 

you hugged him back 

“happy birthday rinrin!!” 

fun facts: you have a good relationship with his family so you’re always welcome to go over there at random times. You already had thought of this 2 months before his birthday. your nickname for him on your phone “gobbo” means hunchback in Italian

author’s note: I don’t know if I should do a part two about what happens at the party since I haven’t thought of what would happen so that’s why I didn’t include it. 

[ms-rampage]

WIP-in a day

Tagged by @redangrypears

Tagging: @mc-flurrie @athenalillystar @queenofhollandvalley @mrsladydiana @hoesephseed @gamer-purgatory @oorah22 @thewanderer-000 @strafethesesinners

I enjoy writing alternate universes/timelines with my OCs and other canon characters.

**************

Working at a prison wasn’t always an easy job, maybe not for Katella Winchester because she’s very well liked throughout the prison and with its inmates. 

Because she was always very sweet, and humble with them, and they loved her for it.

She was working at the Montana State Penitentiary in the Psych Ward where she was loved throughout the prison before she was transferred to the Arizona State Prison in Buckeye. Her home state, and she was relieved to be back home, and only an hour drive away from Phoenix, her hometown. 

After a few weeks of working at the prison, she was given a list of patients since most of the Doctors were given a roster to do their rounds, and check on the inmates.

They got transfers of new inmates that day, and Kate along with her fellow colleagues got their updated roster list.

She walks in through the employee entrance being greeted by the two guards. They scan her ID card, and buzz her in. Going over their usual protocol.

She walks down the hallway to the administration office to sign in on the sign in sheet, and her boss, Warden Cromwell approaches her.

“Doctor Winchester?” he calls her.

“Yes Warden?” she responds, turning to face him.

He hands her a beige paper folder, “Your updated roster. Since we're getting more inmates in this morning”. 

She takes the folder from his hand, “Thank you” she responds. 

“I noticed your roster is a lot bigger than the other Psychologists” he says, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Kate lets out a short laugh, “Yeah I noticed that too. Probably because the inmates really like me, and how I do my sessions”.

“Well whatever it is, keep up the good work, and maybe these people won’t go back to their old lives if they get released”.

He’s about to turn around, and leave when Kate stops him.

“Warden?!” she softly exclaims.

He turns to face her, “Yes?”.

“Would it be okay if I have next Friday off? It’s my daughter’s birthday” she says.

“If you can find someone to cover your shift then it's fine with me” he responds. 

He turns around and walks down the hallway towards his office. 

A few hours go by, and Kate is working with her next patient. A new inmate who was just transferred from Montana State Penitentiary.

She walks into the room where she condones her sessions.

A metal table that is almost 4 feet in width, to give a safe distance between her and the inmate. 

Her sessions are always monitored for her safety, but no audio is heard from the guards point of view. 

She enters the room, and takes a seat at the table, waiting for her next patient.

She checks her roster, her 10:30am-11:30am session with a new inmate. 

Flipping through the pages of her folder to check her new patient, and she feels her heart drop when she sees the name.

“What?!” she whispers, feeling like she’s gonna vomit, “No, no this can’t be happening”.

John Seed is the name. An old lover to Kate. They had broken things off a few years back when she was living in Hope County, Montana. 

Him, his brothers Joseph, Jacob and sister Faith ran a cult called The Project at Eden’s Gate. 

To make all this short and less painful, they killed and kidnapped people into joining their cult.

Kate dated John for 7-9 months when she lived in Hope County, then she moved back to Jackson, Wyoming, and when her older sister moved to Hope County, Kate moved back to Montana, where she had another encounter with John, and it wasn’t as good as it was the first time.

A few weeks before him, and his family were arrested. 

They had sex for the last time, and unknown to her at the time. John had put a hole in the condom he used, and impregnated her.

So her daughter Daenerys is the spawn of John Seed, and her 1st birthday is next week.

The last thing she wanted to see was that psychopath, but she’s a psychologist and it’s her job to see those types of people.

She reads through his file. 

Name: John Seed

Age: 34

DOB: 07/27/1986

Place of Birth: Rome, Georgia

Height: 5’10

Weight: 165

Transfer from Montana State Penitentiary.

She gets thrown off when the loud buzzer goes off, the red light, and the metal door on the opposite side of the room opens loudly.

John steps in, wearing an orange prisoner jumpsuit, his hands cuffed together with a guard behind him.

He looks over, and his eyes light up when he sees Kate. He never not once looked away from Kate’s eyes. Like they were locked together.

She can feel her heart pounding against her chest, her palms turning sweaty. Shaking her leg in nervousness. Her anxiety through the roof. The guard releases one of John’s hands from the cuffs, and locks him to the table. 

“I’ll let you take it from here Doctor” he says to Kate.

She nods her head in response, a slight smile and the guard leaves. Leaving the two former lovers together. She looks down at the file, trying to figure out what to say to him that is relatable to her job.

“I never thought I’d see you again Katella” he purrs, leaning over the table towards her.

She clears her throat, “I could say the same about you”.

He leans back in his seat, and chuckles, “Doctor huh?”.

She nods her head, “Yep, okay so, Mr. Seed I’m gonna ask you some questions, and I want you to answer them as honestly as possible. Okay?”.

“John” he says, “You can call me John. We both know who we are. I mean I took your virginity and made it mine”.

Ignoring his last comment, “Okay John, tell me how are you feeling today?. Any negative thoughts?” she asks, going through her usual route with the other inmates. 

“I’m doing great now that I’m here with you” he flirts, "Negative thoughts? Maybe about the lustful things we did in the past". 

Trying her best to stay professional, and not be rude. 

“That’s great to hear. How are you adjusting to your surroundings?” she asks.  Nervousness, and shakiness in her voice.

He cocks his eyebrows at her, and leans forward.

“Let me ask you a question. Is this what they’re paying you for? Sit around and ask questions?”. 

She takes a deep breath, and says slightly aggressively “Just answer the question”.

He raises his eyebrows, and smirks at her, “Feisty huh?. I like that”.

He places his hands on the table, “I’m adjusting greatly. I have my own cell. A comfortable bed, I get 3 meals a day, and I get to see you for an hour everyday”.

Kate gets goosebumps throughout her body, her stomach in knots and she feels like she’s gonna vomit.

She looks down at her questions in her folder, “How do you feel about being here? What could you have done to prevent yourself from ending up here?”.

John laughs softly at her questions, “Katie, darlin, my love. You should know why I’m here. You were there when they took me away from my brothers and sister. There is nothing I wouldn’t have done to keep me out of here”.

Kate sighs, scratches her eyebrow. Looking down at her folder.

“How do I feel about being here?. Hmm? Let me think” he says with his finger to his chin, scratching his beard, “I hate it here. That’s how I feel about it, but the thought of me seeing you everyday makes me love it here”.

Kate is about to ask her next question when John gives her a question of his own.

“How’s the little one?”. His eyes staring intensely at her, almost piercing through her. If looks could kill she'd be dead.

She stops what she’s doing, and looks at him in confusion.

“What?!” she asks, acting like she has no idea what he’s talking about. 

John lets out an exaggerated sigh, “If I can remember. I knocked you up before I was taken away. So how's our little boy/girl?”. 

Stammering over her words, “Oh I-I uh I lost it, at 3 in half months” she lies, her eyes wandering away from his gaze.

Kate was always a really good liar, but she was never able to lie to John for some reason. 

“Bullshit” he snarled at her, “You claimed to be a good liar, but you were never able to pull it off with me sweetheart. So let me ask again, how is our child?”.

She feels herself go pale, her hands go numb and sweaty at the same time. Scratching the back on her neck.

“That must be a lawyer thing” she chuckles, "Detecting lies".

John stares at her with those intense piercing blue eyes. Those same eyes that their daughter had inherit from him.

“Daughter” she mumbles, looking down at her hands.

‘What was that darlin?” he teases, leaning closer towards her.

“We have a daughter, her name is Daenerys, and she turns a year old next Friday” she says. 

He leans back in chair, staring at Kate, and asks “Who does she look like?”. 

A little off that, that's his first question regarding their daughter, “Like me, but she has your eyes” she responds. A slight smile appears on his face. 

“I notice you don’t have a ring on” he says, “Single mother?”.

Kate nods her head in shame, she wasn’t able to keep a relationship because of her job, and with her daughter, they were both her number 1 priorities. She was okay with being a single mom. Her best friend Morgan helped her out, watching over her when she was at work. Sometimes her mom, or her sister Paige, Sarah, Alissa or any of her friends watched over Daenerys.

On her days off she spends time with her daughter, sleeping in and catching up on her tv shows.

He sighs loudly, catching her off guard. “We would’ve been perfect parents. The best parents, our little girl would be spoiled rotten. Maybe along the way I could fuck our next child into you. I do miss feeling that tight little pussy of yours, and you begging me to fuck you into the mattress. Making you sore, and unable to walk properly”. 

Kate clears her throat, feeling a bit uncomfortable, and a bit turned on at the same time. She hates herself for it, she hates herself in general.

She hesitantly asks her next question, “How would you better yourself for those you care about?”.

John raises his eyebrows at her question, and scoffs “Really?. That’s your question?. Okay” he shrugs. Going along with her "little game".

“I would better myself by being myself. But since you asked for those I care about. I would better myself by being a less shittier person, and maybe if I were to meet our little girl. Then maybe I will better myself for her, and maybe for you." He pauses for a moment, and Kate is about to continue with her session asking more questions, and John interrupts her.

"Just to keep in mind, I think I’ll touch myself tonight, thinking about you. I wasn’t planning on it. Imagining me destroying that pretty little tight pussy of yours, making you scream and beg for me”. 

Kate sighs in annoyance, she knows this session is gonna be a long hour of John flirting with her, telling her all the things he would do to her. 

Finally an hour later, 11:30. John's session is complete for the day. 

A buzzer goes off, followed by the red light on the wall going off, and the locks on the metal door make their loud clanking sounds informing them that they’re being unlocked. 

John looks Kate in the eyes and says, “If there were a prison riot, and all inmates ransack the joint. Keep in mind I’ll be coming after you, and I won't stop until I find you, and do God knows what to you. I know how you like it rough, and hard".

He winks at her, before getting taken back to his cell by the guard. Leaving Kate in the room by herself. 

[prettyinlimegreenboots]

I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.”

I’ve been watching a lot of “Code Black” and “ER” so I decided to put our favorites in as Medical Professionals. Normally, family isn’t allowed to treat other family members but just pretend that doesn’t exist. There are cuss words in this one. 

December 18, 2019 8:30AM

It was a normal shift, well as normal as the emergency room could be. There had been no major shootings or stabbings though the day was still young, he thought as he sat at the nurse’s station filling out paperwork. 

“Why did I choose to go into Emergency Medicine again?” A chart was thrown on the desk as Katherine “Plums” Plumber, PA slumped over looking at Spot. “I just diagnosed my fifth case of the flu. This should be for the general practice peeps, not me.” 

Spot grinned at his favorite colleague. “I’m sorry princess, but you’re drawing alllllll the short straws tonight.” 

“Damn you Conlon - if I find out you’re the one assigning me cases, as head nurse, it’ll be your head. Next one I get I’m requesting you to join me!” She pointed at him as the bay doors were thrown open and a stretcher was pushed through. She grabbed her stethoscope and pointed to him. “Guess I spoke too soon. You’re with me. What do we have?”

“A 29 year old male who is complaining about severe back pains. Pain level is between 6-7. Blood in urine.” The EMT announced as they wheeled him in, screaming about drugs. 

Spot followed along already prepping an IV line and anticipating any directions Plums would throw his way. The two worked in tandem as additional nurses and orderlies made their way to the bay. 

Within minutes, they had diagnosed him with kidney stones and sent him for an ultrasound to see what the prognosis would be. Making his way back to the nurse’s desk, he threw his gloves in the trash and sighed as he sunk into a chair. He relaxed as he listened to the soothing sounds of the ER; it truly was his home away from home. 

“What are your plans for when you leave this place?” He looked up and grinned at Albert, who had his own chart and running his hand through his hair, messing it up. 

Looking at the clock on the wall, he groaned seeing he had another 2 hours. “Sleeping. Race will be home around 4 so I’m hoping I can get a good nap before he gets home. You?” 

“Surprising Finch with dinner tonight.” Albert grinned. 

Spot studied him for a minute before his hand slammed the desk. “You’re proposing tonight aren’t you?” 

“Why dontcha tell the whole department, Conlon?” Albert dragged out as Plums slid over in her chair. 

“He’ll say yes, Albert. You don’t have to worry.” Plums grinned. “He’s been dropping hints for the last four months.” 

Albert smiled. “Thanks Plums. At least someone knows what to say.” 

“Hey now! I gave you all my advice two months ago when you bought the ring.” Spot scrawled his signature across the paper looking between his two friends. “Besides I haven’t told Racer anything and that’s a damn miracle for sure.”

Albert chuckled at his best friend's antics. “Does he suspect anything?” 

“Nope and he won’t.” Spot said as the doors were thrown open with the sight he didn’t want to see. 

“Plums.” He called her name as he pushed off the desk, rolling his chair backwards and onto his feet running to the doors before anyone could comprehend what was going on. He heard feet behind him as he grabbed a stretcher and rolled it towards the door. 

“What the hell happened?” Spot asked, looking between the two males, one of which had blood running down his face. 

“Your fiancé is an idiot.” Jack Kelly looked between Spot and his wife. 

Between Jack and Spot, they heaved him onto the stretcher before wheeling him back to the bay. “What happened?” 

“He has first period planning as do I so he came down to the shop. The next thing I see his head is bleeding and his arm is weird.” Jack said looking between Kat and Spot. 

“Albert, take Jack out to the waiting room.” Kat said, giving her husband a look as Spot started mopping up the blood on Race’s head. Kat was busy checking on a concussion and his injured arm. 

Kat looked up and sighed. “He needs stitches and a possible cast. Spot, you okay doing that?” 

Shaking his head, he looked at her. “I’m not steady. Get Romeo to do it. I'll start his IV.” 

She nodded, calling Romeo to start the stitches as he focused on inserting the IV. At that time, Race started to come around. “Where am I? Don’t infect me with anything …. My fiancé’s a nurse.” 

“Hey, hey Race. You’re in the ER, Jack brought you in. Do you remember what happened?” Spot asked, leaning close to him. 

“Spottie? No what happened?” Race cracked an eye open, squinting at the brightness. “I hurt, Spot.”

Lacing his fingers with Race’s he squeezed them. “What hurts, Race?” 

“My head and my arm.” He groaned. “It’s fuzzy, Spottie.” 

He looked up at Kat before looking at Race. “What’s fuzzy, Race?”

“Your face.” Race said, closing his eyes. 

Kat put a smile on her face as she leaned over Race. “Hey Race, can you open your eyes for me?” 

He cracked them open with a slight grin. “Lucky me, I got the dream team.” 

“You did.” She smiled. “How many fingers am I holding up?” 

“Three.” He rolled his eyes, his non-injured hand flying up to cradle his head. “Ow Ow ow …. that was dumb, make it stop.” 

Spot bit his lip to keep from laughing. “Make what stop?” 

“Spinning of the room.” Race shut his eyes tightly, willing it to stop. 

Uncapping the IV, Spot pushed the syringe that Kat had handed him full of pain medicine. “There, you should be okay in a few minutes. Can you open your eyes for me and Plums? We have a few questions for you.” 

He sighed, cracking open an eye. “Alright, hit me with these questions.” 

“What year is it?” Kat asked, flashing her penlight in his eyes, watching them slowly dilate. 

“2019, unless I was knocked out longer than that.”

Race chuckled. 

Shaking her head, she smiled. “Nope, you’re good. When’s your wedding date?” 

“January 17, 2020.” 

“What’s your dog’s name?” 

“Uhh … Sassie.” 

Kat looked over at Spot giving him a look. “I’m going to diagnose him with a mild concussion. I want him up in radiology getting a look at that hand. We’ll brace it here but he may need a steadier cast. Spot, wanna take him while I go talk to Jack?” 

She had him a chart and left the room. Removing his gloves, he gave a look at his husband. “How are you feeling?” 

“Like I’m floating. Is that normal?” Race asked, as Romeo smoothed a white bandage on his head. Spot smiled in appreciation. 

“Yea but you’ll be okay. We’re going to get you upstairs for a X-Ray.” Spot patting his shoulder, reaching for the phone to call an orderly to move Race. He braced his arm and stood back when a man came to move the bed. “We’re heading to Radiology, Specs.” 

Race gave his fiancé a look. “Is radiology really necessary? My arm is fine.” 

“Uh huh. You heard Kat, we’re gonna go get it looked at.” Spot walked beside the gurney as they got in the elevator. “You don’t have a choice in the matter.” 

Race pouted. “But Spottie, I’m fine.” 

Specs snorted hearing Race call Spot his nickname. “Racetrack, stop while you’re ahead.” 

He sighed, closing his eyes feeling the gurney move from the elevator. Specs parked the gurney across from radiology as Spot quickly thanked him. “I’m going to see where you are in line. I’ll be right back.” 

Race hummed before Spot disappeared into the adjacent room. Luckily, radiology was empty and they were able to take Race right away. 

“Told ya I’m fine, Spot. Quit worrying.” Race said as they moved him back to the gurney as the tech looked at the x-rays. 

“Actually Mr Higgins, you have a fracture on your ulna, which is probably going to require a cast.” The Radiographer, named Blink, gave Spot a look. 

Blink held up the x-ray that had a circle around a thin silver line. “It’s thin but it’s there.” 

“Thanks Blink.” Spot took the X-ray from him before moving the gurney through the door where Specs was waiting. 

The two moved Race through the halls before putting him in an actual room within the ER. “You’re also staying here a lot longer than planned, Racer.”

“What?!?” He exclaimed, sitting up which agitated his head causing him to groan. “Why?” 

Race texted Kat that they were in the room before giving his fiancé a look. “You have a mild concussion, they’re gonna want to keep you most of the day to make sure you’re not gonna die. Also we need to get a cast on that arm.” 

“Hey guys. How’s it going?” Kat asked, coming into the room, grabbing the x-ray, holding it up to the light to review it. 

“I wanna go home, tell Spot that I’m fine and I don’t have to stay.” Race said as Race adjusted his bed so he was on an incline instead of laying flat. 

Kat’s tongue poked out of her mouth as she studied the x-ray and shook her head. “Sorry, Race, but Spot’s right this time. You’ve got a mild concussion, along with the stitches and the cast we’re gonna put on, I want to keep you in here for a bit to watch you and make sure nothing crazy happens.” 

“I wanna have a second opinion ….. I don’t like the dream team so much anymore!” Race gave them both a pout as Spot chuckled. 

Kat gave the two a look. “I could have Talmore come in and look at him.” 

“Oh no! He already thinks Race is pretty - he’s not touching him. Race, a couple of more hours in here and you’ll be free.” Spot shook his head, looking at Race. “I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass.”

Race’s eyes lit up. “ I love you too but you love my stubborn ass.” 

“No comment.”

Kat laughed, shaking her head. “Only you Race. Spot, go clock out. I’ll get Albert to do his cast.” 

“I can do it...” He gave her a look. 

Motioning to the nurse’s station, she smiled. “Go clock out, gather your stuff, grab Jack and come back here. You are almost dead on your feet.” 

He nodded, leaning over and kissing Race’s head, whispering an ‘I Love You’ before promising he’d be back shortly. 

“So how much longer do I need to be in here?” Race asked looking at Kat. 

Looking at the clock that now read 11:00, Kat sighed, handing him a menu from the bedside table. “We need to get some food in you first and you’ve got to finish that IV bag. I’ll come check up on you at 1:30 and if you’re good, I’ll release you.”

“I’m sorry.” Race looked at her whispering the apology. 

Kat sighed, setting the chart down, sitting in the chair beside the bed, relaxing for the first time since Jack brought him in. “For what?” 

“Making yours and Spot’s worst nightmare come true.” Race played with his fingers, avoiding looking at his sister. 

Reaching up, she caught his fingers and laced them with hers. “It’s alright Race. We’re just glad you’re not more seriously hurt. Yea, we dread the day any of our family ends up here but I’m glad it wasn’t anymore serious. Now figure out what you want for lunch and when Spot comes back, you can order. Let him or I know if anything doesn’t feel right or you feel dizzy, alright?” 

“Thanks Kat.” 

“You’re welcome.” She leaned over and kissed his forehead. “Don’t give Spot too much of a hard time. He’s really worried about you.” 

She left the room, leaving him alone as he flipped through the menu. Spot always hated the food, but did mention the mac and cheese was actually pretty good. He decided on that along with a salad and a chocolate chip cookie when the door was pushed open. 

Jack grinned seeing his brother while Spot looked annoyed. “Where’s Kat? Did you decide lunch?” 

“I think she went to do rounds.” Race said as Spot nodded, putting his stuff in the corner of the room. “Mac and cheese, salad and a chocolate chip cookie.”

“Anything to drink?” Spot gave him a look while picking up the phone. 

“Coke.” Spot tilted his head, trying to figure out if the saline in the IV would dilute the Coke enough - it wouldn’t. “Try again, Race.” 

“Ugh killjoy.” Race groaned. “Sprite then.”

Spot nodded, placing the order as Jack looked over Race’s injuries. “You doing alright?”

“Yea, got a fracture on my ulna, a pretty new bandage and apparently I’m concussed.” Race said, as Spot hung up the phone. “And I’m getting a cast at some point.” 

A knock on the door caused them all to look up. Albert grinned pushing open the door. “Hiya fellas. I hear someone needs a cast.” 

“Albie, I have a fracture on my ulna and the dream team thinks I need a cast.” Race pouted giving his best friend a look. 

Albert gave Race a look. “And you’re gonna be the dumbass to defy them?” 

“Well ….. not me but you could.” Race grinned. 

Laughing, he grabbed the necessary supplies before shaking his head. “Dude, I actually like my job. Besides you don’t piss off head nurse Spot or doctor Plums. It ain’t pretty. Just ask Spot about the other day.” 

“Dude, I’m gonna stick you with all the flu cases for the next two weeks if you don’t shut up.” Spot gave him a look as Albert held his hands up innocently. 

Albert turned to Race and gave him a look. “Sorry you’re on your own with defying them. Leave me outta it. What color do you want your cast?” 

“Wimp. What are my options?” Race asked, as Albert crossed the room to open a drawer, looking at the packages inside. 

Albert sighed. “Pink, green, blue, yellow, red, or purple.” 

“What color green?” Race asked with a grin. 

Albert and Spot both groaned while Jack chuckled. “Lime green like your ugly ass shoes at home.” 

“That’ll work.” Race nodded as Spot collapsed on the couch and threw his arm over his face. “What’s wrong Spottie?” 

“I’m tired Race. I was really looking forward to a nap after work before you got home.” Spot sighed, throwing his arm off his face. “I didn’t anticipate the day going like this.”

Jack looked between the two, starting to feel the tension in the room. “Do you guys need anything?” 

“Nah, I think we’re good. Thanks Jack.” Spot stood and gave him a hug before settling in the chair beside the bed. 

Jack leaned over, gave Race a kiss on the forehead before whispering something to him. “I’m heading out but let me know if you need anything. Bye Al.” 

Watching him leave, the room was quiet as Albert put the cast on. Spot held onto Race’s fingers as they watched Al work. “There it should be set in about 5 minutes. Don’t get it wet, Race. Spot knows how to take care of it.” 

“Thanks Albie.” 

“You’re welcome, Race.” Looking over at Spot, Al gave him a look.  “Need anything, Spot?” 

Shaking his head, Spot smiled. “No, I added something to Race’s order and I stole a can of Mountain Dew from the nurse’s station. But if I don’t see you before we leave, have fun tonight.” 

Albert’s face lit up at that. “Will do. Thanks.”

Watching him leave, Spot sighed, leaning back in the chair. He wanted to say something but he didn’t want to unload on Race. He felt Race squeeze his hand, looking up at him. “I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” Spot’s face softened, hearing the fear in Race’s voice. 

Race’s eyes were wet with tears as everything hit him from the morning. “For scaring you, making you worry and having your worst nightmare come true.” 

Standing up from the chair, Spot sat on the side of the bed and pulled Race into his arms, letting him sob. “I’m sorry you got hurt but dammit Race, my heart stopped when I saw you and Jack at the doors. I think I might’ve aged at least 10 years. I want to be pissed off at you but I’m just really glad you’re okay. Just promise me you’ll be more careful?” 

He felt Race nod on his chest as someone knocked on the door. Looking up, Spot rubbed his fingers under his eyes before calling to come in. An orderly came in and delivered Race’s lunch before asking if they needed anything else. She left after they said they were good. 

Spot grabbed a covered cup before sitting in the chair giving Race a look. “Eat!” 

“What did you get Spot?” Race sniffled, wiping his eyes before pouring the dressing on his salad. 

“Mac and cheese. They always have it for the patients but not always for the staff.” Spot popped a forkful in his mouth savoring the taste. “There’s one good thing about you being here - Mac and cheese for me for lunch.” 

Pulling out his phone, he looked at the texts that had come through. He didn’t see one from Medda, not knowing if she knew about Race yet. He sent her a quick text. 

Race’s in the ER with a concussion, 8 stitches and a fracture ulna. He’s okay and we’ll be going home shortly. I’ll have him call you in a bit. 

“Anything interesting going on in the world?” Race asked, motioning to his phone. 

Locking it and slipping it in his pocket, Spot shook his head. “Nah. You’re not missing a thing. Did you drive this morning or did Jack pick you up?”

“Jack picked me up. Why?” Race replied, starting on his Mac and cheese. “Holy shit this is amazing.” 

“Toldya.” Spot ate some more with a grin. “Trying to figure out if I needed to get your car home. I’m guessing you’re off work for a week or so. Do you need anything from school?” 

“My bag but Jack can grab that.” Race said, trying to think if there’s anything else. “I’ll text him later.” 

Silence enveloped the room, as Race slowly ate his chocolate chip cookie. He couldn’t get Spot’s earlier confession out of his mind. “Do you wanna take a quick nap?” 

Spot bounced his feet, shaking his head at Race’s question “Nah … was actually thinking of going to get some charts to work on. Why?” 

“I was going to see if you want to come lay with me. I’m not feeling the best and wanna cuddle.” Spot toed off his shoes, carefully crawling into the bed with his arm around Race as he laid his head on Spot’s chest. Spot gently ran his fingers through Race’s hair as his breath evened out. Looking up at the bag of saline, Spot sighed knowing they had at least an hour more to go. 

Looking down, Spot relaxed seeing Race sleeping soundly. He sighed, running a hand through his hair and thanked his lucky stars that his world was okay. A quiet tap sounded at the door as he said to come in. 

Kat’s face softened seeing the two of them in the bed. “How is he?” 

“He just ate and cried but he’s doing good. No complaints of pain but the meds we gave him would eliminate that.” Spot said looking up at the saline bag. “I’m guessing he has 30-45 minutes left on that.” 

She nodded. “Yea that’s what I’m thinking. I’m going to keep him off work for a week, I don’t want that concussion getting worse. But that’s not why I came in. There’s some paperwork you need to fill out.” 

“Surprised I’m just getting it now.” Spot rolled his eyes. “If you bring it in, I’ll complete it.” 

Kat put a hand on his arm. “Will do. How are you doing?”

“Better now that he’s fine and sleeping. But I was scared there for a moment.” He looked up at her with a smile. “And you, how are you?” 

Shrugging, she looked at Race. “The same. Broke down with Jack earlier and had a good cry so that seemed to help but I think my heart stopped when I saw them in the doorway.” 

“I told Race the same. I’m just glad he’s alright and it wasn’t anything more serious.” Spot pressed a kiss to Race’s forehead, sighing. 

She patted his arm. “Same, Spot. I’ll get those papers and I’ll be right back. You need anything?”

“Alcohol?” He asked, giving her a grin as she laughed. 

“Sorry that’ll have to be later. But Race won’t be able to have any for a couple of days.” She grinned. 

Spot gave her a look before shooing her from the room. “Thanks Plums.” 

“You’re welcome. Let me know if you need anything.” She took her leave, returning a few moments later with a stack of papers before leaving the two alone.

He quickly filled out the admission paperwork that was a couple of hours late. Reviewing them a final time, he scrawled his signature on the line before throwing them on the table at their feet. 

“Mmmmm what time is it?” Race murmured, shifting slightly. 

Running his hand through his hair, Spot started humming before whispering. “You’ve been asleep about 20 minutes. You’ve got some time before your saline bag is done.” 

“It’s bright, Spottie.” Race whined, burying his head deeper into his chest. “Can you turn the light off?” 

Reaching behind him, he flicked the light above the bed off. “That better?” 

“Yes. Thanks Spot. Love you.” He murmured sleepily. 

Pressing his lips to his head, Spot smiled, humming. “Love you too.” 

The opening of the door startled him as he yawned. “You okay?” 

Looking over at Kat as she washed her hands, she smirked at him. “Yea I must’ve fallen asleep. What time is it?” 

“1:30. Saline bag is almost done so I’m going to disconnect it. Wanna wake sleeping beauty up?” She put a pair of gloves on before smiling at the pair. 

Leaning near Race’s ear, Spot pressed a kiss to his cheek before coaxing him away. “Wake up Racer. Kat’s here to kick us out.” 

Groaning, he stretched before cracking his eyes open “I can go home?” 

“If you wake up.” Kat smiled at the grogginess in his voice as she clamped the IV line as the door opened. 

Albert grinned at them. “Thought you guys were already gone?”

“Nah he had to finish a bag of saline before Plums released him.” Spot said as Albert grabbed a pair of gloves and some supplies. 

Spot pushed himself out of the bed, standing near it gripping Race’s hand. “Hey Race, look at me. Don’t look at them.” 

Race looked over at Spot with a grin “Why?”

“Just don’t. Tell me a story, Race.” Spot said, motioning Kat and Albert to go ahead. 

“A story huh? Well Jack likes to come hang out in my Science Class. He has a habit of leaving something random in the room. Some of my students have him as a teacher so he always tells them to look for something out of place. It drives me absolutely bunkers but the kids really enjoy it.” He shrugged, as Albert put gauze on the IV site.

“Race you gotta keep the gauze on for a couple of hours then you can replace it with a bandaid.” Albert gave his friend a look before looking up at Spot who grinned. Albert threw the IV materials always before leaving the room. 

Race flashed them a thumbs up before looking over at Kat. “Can I leave?” 

“Slow your roll.” She gave her brother-in-law a look. “I’ve gotta draw up discharge papers. You’re going to be off work for a week, giving you some time to heal. Take it easy, Race.” She paused, giving him a no-nonsense look. “No alcohol, no strenuous activity, and no baths. Sponge baths for the first couple of days, then you can shower. Spot, you know what you’re looking for. Any questions?” 

Race’s face fell at the restrictions as he looked at Spot who shook his head. “I think we’re good. Thanks Plums.” 

“I’ll come check up on him the day after tomorrow. You’re welcome. Let me get those papers then I’m kicking you to the curb.” She grinned at them, walking out the door. 

Race leaned up and kissed Spot’s chin, the closest place he could reach. “Thanks Spottie. Can we get pizza for dinner?” 

“If that’s what you want, sure we can get pizza for dinner. No pineapple.” Spot shot him a look. “I don’t care if you’re hurt, no pineapple.” 

Race pouted, as the door was pushed open revealing Kat and Specs with a wheelchair. “Kat back me up - pineapple is good on pizza right?” 

“Sure is. Spot let him have pineapple. He’s hurt.” Kat winked at Race as he laughed. She handed Spot the stack of papers. “You know what’s included in here. Let me know if you have any questions. Race, seriously take it easy tonight, watch movies and hang out on the couch type of night.” 

“Thanks Kat. Can I go?” Race looked between the three in the room. 

Spot grabbed his bag from the corner before heading for the door. “I’ll meet you at the exit in a few minutes. Thanks Plums, Specs.” 

He disappeared as Kat and Specs helped him into the wheelchair before pushing him from the room. Several stops were made along the way as their friends said goodbye to him. As promised, Spot was waiting by the exit, his truck idling with the passenger’s door open. With some help, they got Race into the truck, Spot thanking Kat and Specs again. “Ready to go home?” 

“Take me home Spottie.” Race said with a yawn as he pulled away from the curb and headed home. 

Thanks @wide-eyed--wonderer for sending this prompt. This is 4390 words of pure mayhem and Race being Race. Let me know what you think! 

[lenniewip]

Unknown (A Sterek Wrong Number/Celebrity AU)

11.09 PM Unknown Number

>I’m writing songs about you again.

11.20 PM Unknown Number

>its stiles btw.

>in case you deleted my number

>I did.

>I mean I deleted yours.

>but I still remember it apparently

11:41 PM Unknown Number

>I only have 2 lines so far

11:57 PM Unknown Number

>I bleed you from my veins.

>I grieve you like I love you.

>alone.

>its better with the chords.

>u were always better at writing lyrics than me

12:34 AM Unknown Number

>u were better everything than me

2:00 AM Unknown Number

>I hate that I miss you

2:07 AM Unknown Number

>do u want to hook up?

>I promise not to propose again

2:15 AM Unknown Number

>im sorry.

>ignore me.

>im drinking

Derek blinked bleary eyes. His phone screen was the only source of light in his room, as he read through the flurry text messages.

What the hell is a Stiles?

2:17 AM Unknown Number

<I think you have the wrong number

>Lydia?

<no

>oh thank fuck

>I mean

>I’m sorry

>for disturbing ur sleep

>but im just glad I didn’t drunk text my ex all of this

>bullet dodged right?

>is this what near death experiences feel like?

<I wouldn’t know.

>of course

>hey

>seeming as I have you here can I ask you a quick q?

>all my friends are asleep

<probably because its 3am

<everyone’s asleep

>2.39

>and ur not

>asleep that is

>so?

>I’ll take your silence as a go ahead

>what do you think?

>of the lyrics

<im the wrong person to ask

>never experienced heartbreak?

<no

<all song lyrics just look like bad poetry to me

>oh

>yeah I guess it does

>not everyone can be Rupi Kaur tho right?

<do you want to be rupi kaur?

>sure

>not to be dramatic or anything

>but

>I want to be anyone but me

>think id rather be someone like regina spektor tho

<regina spektor?

>singer/song writer

>shes my fucking inspiration

>her lyrics are like poetry to me

>you should listen to her music

<I dont really listen to music

>what the fuck?

>are you an alien?

<no?

>nice fucking try ET

>thats exactly what an alien would say

<…you got me there

>akdjfen

>is this you admitting I was right?

<no

<but this is me going to bed

<because its now 4AM

>already?

>fuck

>ive got an early start tomorrow

>good night random stranger

>and thanks

>for listening

>or reading ig

<good night

//

“You’re late.” Laura frowned, arms crossed.

“Are you going to let me in?” Derek grumbled, still feeling the affects of having stayed up until 4AM the previous night.

Laura didn’t argue she just stepped aside to let him through into her flat. “You’re grumpier than usual.” She noted.

“Didn’t sleep well.”

Derek hated the look she gave him then.

The look that said he was broken. The look that said she wanted to fix him.

“Is…Is it the nightmares again?” Laura’s voice dipped to a whisper, like the question alone would be enough to send him over the edge.

“No.”

An awkward silence defended over the two of them, neither knowing what to say.

Derek clung to the silence like a blanket, wishing things could go back to how they used to be. Back to when they knew how to speak to one another.

But this was enough.

It was enough to know that they were both trying. Failing. But trying.

//

2:40 PM Laura

>I’m here if you need to talk.

//

Derek isn’t good at art, but sometimes it’s the only way he can express himself. Words had never been his forte.

So instead he doodles.

Shitty toddler level doodles that he never shows anyone.

Sometimes he thinks if he could bring himself to show Laura she would like it. Maybe she would even understand it.

But there was a bigger chance that she wouldn’t, and he would feel even more like a stranger to his own sister than he already was.

//

10:18 PM Unknown Number

>I don’t remember it anymore

<You have the wrong number again

>No

>This is ‘not Lydia’ right?

<right

>So here’s the thing.

>I always thought if I needed to text her I could

>And I thought maybe I got her number wrong because I was drunk

>But I can’t remember it anymore

<Oh.

>I have some of her things still

>I don’t think I’ll ever get to return it now

>Unless she messages me first

<When did you two break up?

>Last year

>and I know what you’re thinking

>’it’s October’

>and I should be over her by now

>Trust me I know

>So you don’t need to lecture me

<I wasn’t going to

>Oh

<Stiles?

>That’s weird

<what is?

>I forgot I told you my name

<You should throw away the stuff she left behind.

>you’re right

>I don’t like it.

>but you’re right

>…thanks

<What for?

>for listening

>reading**

>my friends are pretty sick of hearing me complain

>so this is nice

<sure

<anytime

>dope

>no take backsies

<am I going to regret this?

>for definite

>you’re stuck with me now

//

That night Derek saves Stiles’ number as ‘Bad Poet’.

//

Stiles keeps messaging after that.

Stiles messages like they’ve been friends for years, and Derek very determinedly does not analyse why it is he always responds.

Even when there are messages dated from Laura from three days ago that he hasn’t even been able to bring himself to open yet.

He also ignores how when he’s messaging Stiles the gaping pit that had made residence in his chest feels just a little less inescapable.

//

Derek can’t bring himself to tell Stiles his name. He can’t bring himself open up, even though there’s a large part of him that wants to.

He’s not above admitting he’s scared.

//

Derek draws Stiles sometimes.

More accurately he draws a vague pair hands texting on a phone, because he has no idea what Stiles actually looks like.

Derek refuses to let himself dwell on that though, because they are happy drawings.

The pictures of Stiles are pretty much his only happy drawings right now.

//

They don’t always talk about Lydia.

Sometimes Stiles messages Derek song lyrics he’s working on.

Other times it’s memes, or just a bunch of emojis.

Once Stiles had just messaged him what Derek could only assume was a list of everything he had eaten that day.

Sometimes Stiles messages in rambles - and Derek can’t always keep up with the boy’s run away thoughts, but even then he never feels lost the way he does when he’s trying to interact with literally anyone else.

And sometimes it’s 2AM. Those are simultaneously Derek’s favourite and least favourite texts.

//

2:02 AM Bad Poet

>sometimes I feel like too much

>and too little

>at the same time

>u ever feel like that ET?

<not really

>its like I’m infinite, and meaningless

>like a never ending echo

>or a recurring decimal

>I just stretch on and on forever but theres no point to it

>I have no depth

<youre not meaningless

<you’re a rhythm.

<like breathing

>…

>was that a regina spektor reference?

<it might have been

>I thought you didn’t listen to music?

<well someone said her lyrics were like poetry

<so I thought I would check out a few songs

>well fuck

>what did you think?

<she’s good

>you spelt ‘amazing’ wrong

<I still prefer poetry

>of course you do

Derek stared at the texts an ache filling his chest.

Derek was the opposite of infinite. Everything he touched turned to flames.

//

10:30AM Bad Poet

<my sister bought me flower seeds

>I didn’t know you had a sister?

<she’s everything I have

>oh

<and I think she’s trying to trick me into therapy somehow

>…with flower seeds?

<yes

>you sound extremely paranoid

>maybe therapy wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for you?

<shut up

>noted.

>keep me posted on how your gardening goes

>also

>as a side note

>you know you have me too right?

>if you ever need to talk or anything, I’m right here for you

<thanks

>anytime

//

On Derek’s birthday Laura insists the two of them spend the day together, and Derek knows better than to argue.

She buys him a cake and they spend hours sat next to one another silently. Two strangers desperately trying to keep hold of one another but with an ocean dividing them.

Once their family had been so alive.

And it was all Derek’s fault that was gone.

They both knew it.

Sometimes Derek wondered if Laura hated him as much as he did.

He was too scared to ask.

//

That night Derek chased the ache in his chest away with a drink.

And then several more followed.

//

1:14 AM Bad Poet

<seh haars me

>sorry bud, you’re going to have to try again

>try spell checking before hitting send

<she.hates mee

>who?

<larn

>are you drunk?

<yeh

<tyongs ndrf

*Out Going Call: Bad Poet*

The phone rings twice before being picked up. “Sorry. Stupid keyboard is so small. Impossible to type.” Derek mumbled, his words slightly muffled by his cheek being pressed into the sofa cushion.

“Wow. You’re really sloshed huh?”

“No.” Derek denied. “Just tipsy.”

“Right. So what was it you were trying to tell me? Someone hates you?”

“Laura.”

“Who’s Laura?”

“My sister.”

“Oh.”

“She looks at me like she wishes she could fix me.”

“That doesn’t sound like she hates you, bud.”

“She should. I can’t be fixed.”

“You’re right, because you’re not broken.”

Hearing Stiles say that Derek could almost believe it to be true.

“I mean it. You’re not broken. You’re just a different shape than you used to be. But the shape you are now is beautiful.”

Derek closes his eyes and lets the words wash over him. “Do you sing?” He finds himself asking.

“What?”

“I know you write songs, but do you ever sing?”

“Oh…” Stiles sounds uncomfortable. “I guess… Yeah. I do.”

Derek hummed in the back of his throat. “I bet you have a nice voice.”

“Th-thanks.”

Derek tried to say something else, but all that comes out is a yawn, which makes Stiles let out a jittery laugh.

Derek tries to memorise the sound of It, but it’s so fleeting, it’s already slipping away from him.

“I think you need to go sleep, ET.”

“Yeah.” Derek agrees.

“Goodnight bud.”

“Wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you stay on the phone? Just for a bit longer.” Derek clutched on to the phone like if he could grip tightly enough it would make Stiles stay.

I don’t want to be alone. The words die on Derek’s tongue.

“Sure.” Stiles didn’t hesitate. “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

Sleep pulled at Derek’s consciousness, unravelling his grip on reality.

“Stiles?”

Stiles hummed in answer.

“Your shape is beautiful too.”

A small whimper came from the other end of the phone. “Thanks.”

//

7:50 AM Bad Poet

>how are you feeling today?

<better

>good <3

Derek holds his phone tightly and wishes that he had more to say. Just to keep the conversation going.

He also wishes (not for the first time) that Stiles was more than a faceless entity on the other end of the phone.

But it’s the first time he feels the want like a physical ache in his chest.

Derek had never been good with words, but if Stiles was here in front of him Derek would probably give him a hug.

But everything Derek touches eventually dies, and a larger part of him is relieved for the distance.

//

Derek plants the seeds his sister got him that day.

//

9:48 PM Bad Poet

>would it totally weird you out if I wanted to do another phone call?

>don’t feel like you need to say yes

>I just enjoyed talking to you

>and hearing your voice

>ugh.

>why are words so hard?

<I wouldn’t be opposed to a phone call

*Incoming Call: Bad Poet*

“Hey.” Derek feels breathless as he answers the phone, anxious excitement clawing it’s way up his throat.

“Hey.” Stiles sounds equally out of breath, and that helps.

Derek chews on his lip, scrambling for something to say. “What did you want to talk about?”

“I don’t know.” Stiles admitted. “Anything.”

“Helpful.” Derek said sarcastically.

“I mean. There’s one thing. I didn’t want to ask when you were drunk because it felt a little like taking advantage. And I don’t want you to think you have to answer-”

“Stiles.” Derek interrupts before Stiles could break into a full blown ramble.

“Tell me your name.” Stiles breaks. “Please.”

Anxiety grips his heart. But… he couldn’t stay scared forever.

“It’s Derek.”

“Derek.” Stiles repeats his name in a reverent whisper, as if committing it to memory.

And hearing Stiles say his name makes everything worth it.

//

Phone calls become a regular thing between the two of them over the next month. Always between late in the evening and the early hours of the day.

//

The next time Derek spirals he doesn’t drink before he calls Stiles, but he does cry on the phone.

The next morning he wakes up to a text from Stiles.

6:42 AM Bad Poet

>you need to talk to your sister

And Derek knows he’s right.

//

It’s not easy confronting Laura. He has two separate anxiety attacks on the walk to her apartment alone.

But he forces himself to take the dive.

“It’s okay if you hate me.” He tells her, even though it’s not okay. Laura’s hate might be the only thing in the world that could break him beyond repair.

Laura looks horrified as she stares at him. “I don’t- Obviously I don’t hate you Derek.”

“It’s my fault that they’re gone.” Derek addresses the elephant in the room.

If he hadn’t fallen in love with Kate.

If he hadn’t broken up with her, just to try and prove a point when she refused to say ‘I love you’ back…

There never would have been a fire.

Their family would still be here if it wasn’t for him.

“Fuck that!” Laura let out a harsh noise. “Derek, none of this was ever your fault. You were a kid, and even if you weren’t… You never set the fire.”

“I might as well have.”

“No. If anyone… I was your big sister- am your big sister. But I was so fucking wrapped up in myself. I didn’t even know about Kate.”

The last time Derek had seen Laura cry it had been at the funeral, so it took a second to fully sink in what he was seeing.

He found himself crying to.

“I’m so sorry, Der.”

Derek stumbled forwards pulling Laura into a crushing hug. Laura hugs him back just as tight.

They spend hours refusing to let go of one another.

//

He realises he fell asleep on Laura’s sofa when he woke up to the sound of his phone ringing. But he had no idea where it was, and he was too tired to move.

He feels Laura moving and the sound of the phone ringing gets louder before cutting off abruptly.

“Hello?”

“No - Derek’s asleep.”

“Maybe call at a more reasonable time?”

“Who is this?”

“Your voice sounds familiar.”

“Right.”

“Okay. Bye.”

Derek let sleep over take him once more.

//

2:29 AM Bad Poet

>sorry for calling so late

>you’re asleep so I’ll just take to you tomorrow

//

9:07 AM Bad Poet

<sorry, I was really tried

>no worries man

>you’re allowed to have a life outside of me

<was something wrong?

>no I was just bored, and didn’t realise how late it had gotten

>im fine

>how are you?

<im good actually

<I spoke to Laura

>yeah?

>I’m proud of you

>how’d that go?

<we both cried

<a lot

<and I ended up falling asleep on her couch

>look at you, opening up and shit.

>think I might cry now

<shut up

>literally never

>better men have tried and failed to silence me

//

2:40 PM Laura

>Want to see a movie on Friday?

<sure

//

One night Stiles calls Derek just to say his name in stupid ways, and laugh himself stupid after each one.

“Duhreek.”

“Doreck.”

“Fuck. I’m getting a stitch from laughing.”

“You’re so fucking dumb.” Derek is smiling as he said it.

“Deeruk.” Stiles wheezes out.

Derek just closes hie eyes and listens.

“I’m so fucking glad I know you, Stiles.” The words fall out of Derek’s mouth without much thought.

He only realises the weight of his words when Stile’s laughter pulls to a stop.

“I uh-” Stiles stammered. “Me too. Fuck. You’re the best thing to happen to me in…so fucking long. I’m glad I know you too Derek.”

//

Derek finally admits to himself that night that he’d fallen at least a little in love with the stranger from the unknown number.

//

He keeps trying to draw Stiles, but he can’t. Vague shapes just don’t cut it anymore.

He wants to map Stiles out with his eyes and translate it onto the page.

He wants to be able to see the smile behind the laughter.

He wants.

//

1:58 AM Bad Poet

>do you think you day we’ll actually meet?

>maybe not intentionally

>maybe one day we’d pass each other in the streets and not even know

>maybe we already have

Derek couldn’t imagine a scenario where he wouldn’t notice Stiles.

<is there ever a moment when you’re not talking?

<I think id recognise your voice and know it was you

>maybe your face would make me speechless ;)

<I think id still know

<but if you want to be sure… I could send you a picture?

<of me

>dkfajd

>for reals?

>you would do that?

>you?

<well…not for free

>there’s always a catch

>what do you want?

>my soul?

>a blood debt?

>you can have whatever it is

<I meant you’d have to send me a picture too

<geez stiles

The next text takes an unnervingly long time to come through.

>I could do that

>a photo for a photo

>I kind of look like shit rn

>so no judging me

Derek spends the next two minutes fussing and fidgeting to take a good photo. No matter what angle he took it from the bags under his eyes were noticeable, and so was the week’s worth of stubble he had yet to shave off.

And maybe this was a terrible, awful, idea.

But Derek would send one hundred bad pictures if it meant getting to see one of Stiles.

He forced himself to press send on the last picture he took.

As he pressed send another photo came in.

Derek’s fingers shook as he hit the button to download the image.

His heart stopped.

Stiles was beautiful in every sense of the word, and Derek found himself unable to look away. Even when he heard the small dings of incoming messages.

But he couldn’t ignore them for long, because it was Stiles. And when ever Stiles messaged Derek had to answer.

>Fucking hell

>are you for real?

>you gave me a heart attack

>am I being catfished right now?

>when do you think you were going to tell me you’re the most fucking beautiful man to exist ever?

>how the hell to you look like that as 2AM!?

>Derek

>oh my god

>you gotta respond my dude because I’m freaking out a little bit

>still there?

>did my selfie scare you away?

>I would have tried harder for a nice photo if I knew I was talking to an adonis

>Derek?

<still here

>of thank fuck

>so…

<so?

>come on

>your going to give me a complex

>the selfie…was it okay?

>I know it’s not much

>but we can’t all be greek gods

<its beautiful

<you’re beautiful, stiles

>oh

>thanks

//

Derek is so far gone that he makes the picture of Stiles the home screen on his phone.

//

9:49 AM Bad Poet

<Laura wants me to meet her boyfriend

<this is all your fault

>how is this my fault?

<because she never wanted to introduce us before

<and then you got me to talk to my sister

<and now she wants me to meet him

>…and this is a bad thing?

<yes

>because?

<I don’t make good first impressions

<it’s going to be awkward

>yeah probably

<you’re not helpful

>I wasn’t trying to be ;)

>have fun, Derek!

//

Meeting Laura’s boyfriend wasn’t as awkward as Derek thought it was going to be. But it was strange.

Derek hadn’t been expecting to meet someone so soft and kind. He was nothing like any one that Laura had dated before.

But he also wasn’t used to seeing Laura smile as much as she did around him.

Maybe not all change was bad.

//

Derek tells Laura about Stiles by accident. Or more accurately he mentions Stiles once by accident (not even by name) and Laura had badgered him until he admitted that he had made a friend through a wrong number.

“There’s a lot of weirdos out there.”

“I know.”

God did Derek ever know.

But Stiles is different.

“Just…be careful.”

“I am being. I promise.”

Laura reluctantly lets it go after that. “So…what’s he like?”

“He’s…he’s like bad poetry.”

“Oh god. You’re in love with him aren’t you?”

Derek can’t bring himself to deny it, but he does tell Laura to shut up.

//

Derek fully embraces being in love with Stiles on the day he tells Stiles about his drawings. He’d never told anyone about them before - not even Laura. But telling Stiles had been easy.

‘It reminds me of line art’ Stiles had said when Derek had sent him a photo of the doodle he had been working on. “I love it’.

A warmth flutters through Derek’s veins.

//

It all goes sideways on the day Laura goes on Derek’s phone to check the time.

She’d raised one eyebrow at him looking amused.

“I thought you didn’t listen to music?” She said, a teasing note to her voice.

“I don’t.” Derek shrugged.

“A huh. So why do you have a picture of Stiles Stilinski as your wallpaper?” She asks.

It’s so startling to hear Stiles name coming out of Laura’s mouth that Derek’s brain refuses to function properly. “How do you know Stiles?” He asks weakly.

Laura laughs. “He’s not exactly a niche celebrity Der. He was a really famous YouTuber before he started selling albums.”

Derek doesn’t know what to say to that. He blinks as his world slowly unravels before him.

No.

She had to be wrong, because Derek couldn’t be in love with a celebrity. Stiles couldn’t be…

“Hey are you okay? You look really sick?”

“He’s famous?” His throat is dry.

“Yes? Are you okay? What’s wrong? You’ve got to speak to me Der. Use your words.”

Derek just shakes his head because he can’t.

“It’s him.” He manages to get out.

“What are you talking about?”

“Laura. It’s him.”

It takes a moment to click but Derek knows when it does because a look of thunderous wrath takes over Laura’s face.

“I’ll kill him.” She seethes, shaking with anger. “What kind of fucking punk thinks that this is a good prank to play?”

“What?”

“No one is getting away with catfishing you, Der. I’m going to hunt this fucker down, and then I’ll rip him so many new ones that he going to look like SpongeBob when I’m done with him.”

And god, Derek hadn’t even considered the thought that Stiles might not even be Stiles. The thought of Stiles being a liar…

The gape in his heart grows a little bit bigger.

And it all falls apart.

//

It takes hours before Derek can convince himself to confront Stiles.

11:08 PM Bad Poet

<you’re stiles stilinki

>fuck

(And yeah, it was really him).

>how did you find out?

<Laura

>I was going to tell you

<Were you?

>Yes

>I’ve wanted to for ages

>It just never felt like the right time to bring it up

<I wish you had decided on the right time was sooner

>Me too

>I’m sorry

>Please don’t hate me

Derek did not think it was possible for him to hate any part of Stiles.

<I don’t

>Thank fuck

>seriously

>can I call you?

<sure

Derek closed his eyes after sending the text and waited for Stiles to ring. A heartbeat later his ringtone sounded off.

“Hey.”

“You believe me right?” And Stiles sounds more frantic than Derek had ever heard him before.

“I believe you, Stiles.”

“Are you sure, because I can prove it if you want? I can do a video call? Or I can tweet literally anythi-”

“Stiles.”

“Yeah?”

“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”

Stiles lets out a small whine, that reaches through the phone line and yanks at Derek’s already tattered heart, unraveling him just a little more.

“Meet me.” Stiles said, taking Derek by surprise.

“What?”

“Please. I meant to throw a please in there, I’m just really fucking nervous right now. Meet me please. In real life. I uh- I was going to ask when I finally told you about the whole being a celebrity thing. It’s still weird to say that out loud. That’s part of why it was so hard to tell you. But the point was you beat me to the punch with the whole reveal thing, but I still wanted to ask.”

“Stiles…”

“And it’s not that I was trying to use my influence or fame to pressure you into meeting me. I just wanted to be in a space where we were one hundred per cent honest with one another before I asked you. You can still say no. Of course you can, I don’t know why I’m- my point is I hope you don’t say no.”

Derek feels his heart break in two.

“Stiles…I can’t.”

“Oh.”

He hadn’t fully realised just how many worlds apart the two of them were when he had fallen in love with Stiles. It felt even more impossible than it had before.

“I’m sorry.” The words leave him feeling hollow.

“No. Don’t apologise. This is just me getting carried away. It’s okay.”

I love you. The words never leave Derek. They can’t leave him.

There was no way this could work, and he was far too scared of breaking the tentative connection they had with his useless words.

It was better for him to just… fall out of love.

//

6:17AM Laura

<it’s really him

>are you sure

<I’m sure

>what are you going to do?

<nothing

>Derek you’re in love with him

<I’m aware

<it doesn’t matter

<it wouldn’t ever work

>I’m sorry

<don’t be

<I’m going to be fine

>Im coming over with wine

//

That night Derek fills pages and pages of his notebook with drawings of Stiles.

When he gets a message from Stiles at 11PM- for the first time since they started messaging- Derek leaves it unopened.

//

He never ignores a message again after that, and life moves on. Stiles still messages him all the time, but he never asks to call anymore.

Derek misses his voice so much that he goes onto youtube and listens to his music.

He buys all three albums Stiles released and it still doesn’t feel like enough.

//

He fills an entire notebook with doodles of Stiles.

It’s still not enough.

//

1:11 PM Bad Poet

>I wrote you a song

>I know you don’t listen to music

>but it felt weird to not a least send you a link

>bad poetry at 2:00am

The link leads Derek to a youtube video of Stiles holding a ukulele and staring with a soft smile at the camera.

“Hey guys. It’s been a while, huh? But I guess I finally found inspiration. So here we go.”

The song is beautiful, but even more beautiful than that was Stiles.

When the song reached the end Derek doesn’t hesitate to hit replay.

He listens to the song ten times before he realises he’s crying - and he knows that he’s never going to ‘get over’ Stiles because he doesn’t want to.

//

3:00 PM Laura

>have you seen the video?

<he sent me a link

<he wrote a song for me Laura

<I love him so fucking much and he wrote a song for me

>fuck

<what do I do?

>what do you want to do?

<I don’t know

>I think you should look at his twitter

<?

>I wasn’t going to say anything because you said you wanted to get over him

>but I think you need to see it

>@stilesstilinki

//

@stilesstilinski

I want to hug him

@stilesstilinski

Get you a guy that will stay up with you until 4AM talking about literally anything

@stilesstilinski

Why do I alway fall for people so far out of my league? rip me I guess.

@stilesstilinski

He makes me want to write poetry

Derek spends hours scrolling through Stiles’ twitter.

He scrolls far enough back that he gets to the part of his timeline where his twitter is littered with pictures of Lydia, which causes the ache in Derek’s chest to grow. But he can’t stop looking because Stiles looks so happy.

And Derek falls impossibly more in love.

He lets himself acknowledge for the first time that Stiles might love him back.

And everything else?

It’s worth it.

Because Stiles is worth everything to Derek.

//

2:00 AM Bad Poet

<so I looked at your twitter

>fuck.

>how much did you see?

<all of it

>tight

>please excuse me while I go die now

>bye

<don’t leave yet

<I had something I wanted to ask you

>did you want me to delete the tweets?

>I can do that

>I’ll just delete the whole account

>I am my own worst enemy so this won’t be a problem

>actually Jackson Whittemore is my worst enemy

>but I’m a close second

<stiles?

>yup?

<Will you go on a date with me?

>alkdjf

>yes?

>Ofc yes?

>are you being serious?

>because this would be a cruel prank if you’re not serious

<I’m serious

>yes.

>yes. yes. yes. yes. yes. yes.

>holy shit

>theres no fucking universe where I say ‘no’ to that question from you

>im so fucking in love with you

>is it too soon to say that?

>I don’t even care

>I’m speaking my truth

>you obviously don’t have to say it back

>im going to woo you so hard Derek

>you’ll have to love me back eventually

>I’m going to write you poetry

>hell I’ll even read poetry for you

>ill give the whole fucking moon to you

<why would I want the moon?

<im not gru?

>despicable me

>that was a despicable me reference.

>you don’t listen to music, but you watch despicable me?

>you’re such an enigma to me Derek

>god I love you so much

<stiles?

>too much?

<no

<I don’t think I could ever have too much of you

<I love you too stiles

<so much

<I just don’t want you to get your hopes up

<I might not be able to live up to it in real life

>impossible

<seriously stiles

>I am being serious

>I’m already in love with you Der

>you don’t have to do anything more than you’ve already done

>you could wear a potato sack, and spend the whole night not saying anything at all

>and I would still be in love with you

>all you have to do now is show up

<…I can do that

>perfect

//

TWO YEARS LATER

@stilesstilinski

Hey @JacksonWhittemore, remember when you told me I would die alone? Well I just got engaged to the love of my life. So checkmate fucker.