#it's 4am and I'm about to go to sleep so these r just late night ramblings of a girl picking at her leftovers like this is it.. peak spicy

[kuromi-hoemie]

when you ask a restaurant for spicy food and instead of cooking it in a way that makes the end result hotter they just obliterate all the flavor by dumping heaps of sriracha all over it after the fact

[yeosin-n]

4am

4 am and Sans was still awake. 

4 am and you were still awake. 

It's an awful, terrible habit of yours. 

Staying up late doing who knows what-- 

Sans had been laying in bed, waiting for you to join him... for a while now.

 "aren't you coming to bed, babe?" 

You waved him off, telling him you'd be there soon.

"...babe." 

"babe, you said you'd come to bed soon 3 hours ago." 

".....babe."

You ignore him. 

He rolls his eyelights. 

"y/n. sweetheart. light of my life. look at me." 

Looking up from your project and furrowing your brows at the nagging skeleton, you grumbled out a simple "Wuht." 

"can't ya work on that tomorrow?" 

You huffed and turned back to work. "But I'm in the zone! And the sooner I finish, the better!"

"aren't you tired, though? you-" 

You grumble, slightly tuning him out, "Tired of you, maybe.." 

... 

...... 

......... 

The silence the night brought was suddenly deafening. 

Peeking over at Sans, you see that his eyes were void of any light and his usual lazy grin, strained. 

Quickly looking away, you try to swallow down your guilt, "Sorry. I didn't mean that."

The sound of the bed sheets rustling and coming to a stop makes you think that Sans gave up and was going to sleep without you. 

Good! 

But... you didn't want him to think that you were actually tired of him. It was a dumb thing to say. And if you were tired enough to say that kind of thing without thinking, maybe you should head to bed too.. 

You set your things down and get up- only to bump into something, making you stumble a bit back. 

"Wuh." 

You look up. 

"Sans?" 

He's smirking now. 

"tired of me, huh?" 

"I really didn't mean th-" 

His arms snake around your waist, and he chuckled, giving you a chaste mock kiss on the side of your head. Before you knew it, you were thrown over his shoulder. 

"Sans?!" 

He pats your butt, as if it would comfort you, and you try to wiggle yourself down. 

"Sans-" 

You're falling and the bed welcomes you with a loud thwump. It didn't take long for Sans to crawl onto the bed with you, on top of you, caging you in between his arms. 

"you gotta stop resisting a-rest."

The cheeky smile and glint in his eye was almost.. no... definitely.. predatory. 

"maybe you need a pun-ishment?" 

Curling up and into yourself, you cover your warming face. 

"Sans, it's four in the morning...!" 

He scoffed, shaking his head at you before leaning down close. "you think i don't know that, babe?" Sans asks you softly. 

"i've been," 

A kiss on your neck. 

"waiting to do this," 

A kiss on your chest. 

"all night." 

He brings your hand up to his face, kissing that as well, as his other hand claws down your back, causing your body to arch up into his. 

You let out a whine, "Sans, wait-" 

He cuts you off, chuckling, "i've waited enough, y/n."

R r r i i i p p p p p

Toss. 

"Wh- I liked that shirt!" 

A brow was raised, "that's my shirt." 

"Yea, so?  I liked it..! It was soft!" 

"there will be other shirts for you to steal." 

"But-" 

He cuts you off again, catching your lips into a deep kiss, one that leaves you just a little bit breathless.

Leaning back, Sans grins down at you, taking a moment to savor the look of your flushed cheeks and the hint of desire in your eyes. The rise and fall of your chest enticing him to lean back in. 

"i love you," he says against your skin, causing your breath to hitch. "i love you so much, y/n.." 

"I --" 

You opened your mouth to reply but what you thought was going to be a kiss above your heart turned out to be a stinging love bite..! Immediately turning your words of affection into an embarrassing, choked moan. 

He chuckled against your newly formed bruise and you press your lips shut tight as he bites down again, in a new spot. Try as you might, you couldn't stop the small whimper from escaping your throat. 

As his hand slid down your sides, Sans relished the feeling of your soft skin at his fingertips. 

He loved everything about you.

Your laugh.

Your smile.

Your eyes.

Stars, and your voice.

So sweet.

So cute.

He wants to hear more.

He wants to hear you whimpering his name.

You were his.

And he wanted everyone to know it.

He…

His hands stop at your hips, confused. You weren't wearing anything else? How did he not notice?

"naughty…"

You bend your knees, pressing your thighs together. "I couldn't find any… It was laundry day and we didn't-"

"cute." He grabs your knees, easily prying your legs apart despite your wiggling. "but you don't have to lie, babe." He teases.

You pout, deciding that arguing with him wasn't worth it. Instead, you turn your body sideways, thinking it'd be easier to escape if-

It wasn't.

Sans pulls you closer, his knee in between your legs, preventing you from closing them again. "stop squirming."

"we don't have all night, y'know?"

[revivebook]

hello! sorry for the later anon again tonight, I have been very tired all day :( but its okay! I'll make up my rest this weekend!

how has your day been, though? for me aside from the underlining sleepiness ive had a good one! gettin ready for my first final of my finals season Monday and the preparation is actually going quite well so I'm very happy about that!!

then not to mention the content today!! it was a lot but all still very good and I am both terrified and very excited to see where everything goes! if I do not get more protective ranboo I'm going to riot, just so everyone's aware

and to acknowledge ur ranboo kin assignment, ur right i am a ranboo kinnie! i feel like its pretty obvious by the fact I started doing this soft anon thing to begin with lmao. and trust me i love seeing ur responses! when i send in late night asks I stay up an extra 30 mins to see if u replied just because knowing ur smiling makes me :]

and who knows ram, maybe I was going for a one sided love simon au

as ramble-y as ever - soft anon

YOU BIG SOFTY YOU NEVER HAVE ANYTHING TO APOLOGIZE FOR CMERE IM READMORE-ING YOU AGAIN BOSSMAN

You goofball. You Absolute Buffoon no apologizing necessary ever ever, never feel obligated to send anything okay?? I care abt you So Very Much and I miss u when I don’t hear from you for a bit because I am Clingy but YOUR ENERGY IS PRIORITY DAMN U !! You have absolutely nothing to make up for but. If you did wanna send stuff oh the weekends,, peepoShy :D

My days been.. honestly way better than I was expecting?? The date itself can be a lik rough but oh my god I Love My Friends So Fucking Much Okay. I want to literally shout it from the rooftops I’m so lucky I stg. And for you—okay mr (? :O) hotshot look at you go being all prepared for finals season leave some for the rest of us smhhh. BUT SERIOUSLY IM PROUD IF U AND SO GLAD ITS GOING GOOD FUCK YEAH!!! you’ve literally got this in the bag :DD

And oh my god. The Content Today o(-(. The fnaf stream fuckin LORE and then one of the sweetest ebs streams we have had in literal weeks I am So. sobs into hands what did we do to deserve this oh my god (/pos) I’m so hyped I cannot WAIT. And softy softy absolutely same hat protective Ranboo makes me CRY ok holyshit my heart I just. Yearns

AND HAH. HAH I KNEW IT !! I know a Ranboo kinnie when I see one hehehe we are a matching set :] AND HEY NO jack manifold voice DONT READ NOW!! NO STAYING UP FOR MY RESPONSES THIS ISNT 4AM AND IM ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE WITH RESPONSE TIMES HEY. spray bottle noise NO PRIORITIZING ME OVER LITERALLY SLEEPING YOU GOOFBALL

And u bastard you can’t just leave me with those final two lines I’m going to be thinking about that until I fall asleep how could you do this to me. u r so very cruel. this is endearment bullying softy I hope you know

And all of your responses and the things you say are perfect don’t you even start. Since your late night rambles are You I wouldn’t want them any other way :D

—love, ram :]

[chelleztjs18]

Hello you mrs. honey nut cheerio lady robin hood who likes christmas but is allergic to the pine tree lefty eyebag 😌

I fell asleep but then woke up, saw your answers and fell back asleep 😅 I was going to respond but I couldn't keep my eyes open and I would have probably typed some gibberish.

Hope you slept well. Doing anything fun today? Or just finishing up little stuff before you guys leave for the airport?

So when you do that, does it ever creep your customers out when you guess their order correctly? Also, the thing about guessing the voices from animation or movies, that's amazing. I could never even guess or be close to who it is if I did guess.

I'm the same way with names and numbers. I try to guess the name and it's always far off 😅 then numbers always get jumbled.

Ah I see. What's the most words you have written in just an hour? Also, have you ever finished writing a fic then reread it after and scrap the whole thing?

I'm the same way with reading fics with a lot of kinks. I think I just read the fic, but then once I see something disturbing to me, I stop. I try to push myself to see if I can handle reading it, but then it actually weirds me out so I can't continue 😅

I think my answer is the same as yours. Especially the bdsm with pain, or if it has blood and other bodily functions..no no for me. And is pet play like beastiality? Sorry I don't think I know that.

I did not expect the naenae song 🤣 do you do the dance too?? Hahaha

For me:

1. Dynamite by BTS

2. Secret Love Song by Little Mix

3. Any country songs lol

Name 3 songs that remind you of your crush.

- CuriousGeorge

Hello hello youngins righty eyebag! 😅

I wanna see what kind of giberish u type if u reply mr when u r sleepy.lol.

How r u? N how was ur day? R u feeling better emotionally?

I didnt sleep well last night. Stayed up until like past 2.am. i got a little panic attack becausr i overthought if i forget something or if i pack too much.

We got to the hotel around 4pm. N im just chillin now.

The hotel is nice.. was thinking to sleep early tonight because we gotta wake up at 4am to go to the airport but the room has a separated room like a living room with desk n chair with tv also, so it is so tempting to stay up late n write. 😅 but i think i should sleep early..but im not sure.lol.

Haha no. They actually love it.. but i did kinda shocked one customer though because i started the talk in a wrong way but then she laughed about it. It was when i was in new orleans walk at night n i was kinda drunk. N i recognize too. N my drunk ass talked to her n say "excuse me, u live in ...(city name) right?" 😅

N her drunk face was like "wtf" n she said yeah.. n i was like "oh no dont worry, im sorry..i work at (sushi restaurant name) n i serve ur table pretty often." Then i start mention her regular orders n then she recognize me.🤣🤣🤣 n she laughed. Then we walked the bourbon street together drunk. 🤣

About recognize actors / actress voice in animation movie, sometimes i got it right sometimes i dont.😅🤣

Yeah numbers n names r hard to remember.

I never pay attention how much i write in an hour. Mostly 1 fic i wrote at least between 4-6K words but the most in one fic i think it's like 12K but i end up splitting them to few parts. If The Monsters Within a whole one fic it will be the longest i hv written because over 18K words n still counting. 😊

Yeah i have done that, but not scraping the wholr thing though, i scrapped almost half of it.. one time i wrote quite a lot, ideas flowed n stuff..i wrote it on google doc n it was on offline mode because i was on a flight. But when i finally connect it to internet, the part that wrote was not saved n gone.. i wanted to cry. I think it was the dark wanda fic "I Love You Too Much" i dont know if u have read that but yeah i had to write all over again.

Haha yeah im like that too. It was an age play fic, i tried to be open minded about it but i stopped in the middle because i couldnt read it.

Petplay is a kink where one of them act like a pet such as puppy,or kitten or bunny. I dont mind reading light pet play but not too much. Im not good at explaining this but i guess u can google it. 😊

Haha yeah sometimes i do the nae nae song but only when im drunk. 😅 im not a good dancer n too shy for that. But when im drunk im a different person.😅🤣

Ah okay.. i will check those songs.. u dont like country song? I think pop country r very nice to listen to, for me. 😊

Song that reminds me of H? Hmm...

1. Gorgeous by Ash (the one that inspired me smut idea with Natasha. 😊

2. Con La Brisa by Foudeqush

3. Gooey Rework by Glass Animals. 😁

What about u?

Also i think u asked something about pt. 4. I dont remember if i have answered it or not. Can u remind me again? Im too lazy to scroll to my answers right now. Sorry. 😁😆

Next question?

Cheerio! (Not the cereal one)

[copperbadge]

Hi Sam! I'm curious about your magical time management skills: you have a full-time job, are super active in fandom, answer countless asks, write fanfiction and books, and still have time for jogging and many other stuffs. How do you organize yourself? I feel super overwhelmed due to lack of time and end up not doing what I want do. Do you allot time to do stuff? How does your typical day looks like? And any useful tips for us slackers.

I dunno how helpful it’ll be – I mean, some of it is time management, and some of it is that I have spent a long time working on arranging my life so that I have as much free time to pursue my own interests as possible. This hasn’t consciously meant giving up things like close brickspace friends and romantic relationships but in some ways it has kind of worked out that way. (Not that I couldn’t have those things if I chose to work towards them, in other words, but they don’t come naturally to me and I don’t mind the lack.) 

So, I will give you a rundown of my average day, but before we begin, I will also give you some context! And this will be long so I’ll put it under a readmore. 

I have at present no romantic partner, no children, no pets. This sounds sad, but I’m not complaining; I could work towards those things and choose not to, for a variety of reasons, some good, some not. I would like to have a partner, but honestly at this point in my life it’s as much because it’s cheaper to cohabitate; I am very independent and not, I suspect, built for the kind of daily intimacy that romantic cohabitation requires. 

If I were to get a pet it would probably not be a dog, since when I was dogsitting for R I had real trouble with the concept of properly caring for a creature whose life was so scheduled, who required specific attentions at specific times – I have owned dogs before and love them deeply, but never in an apartment or as a solitary person. I would probably get a cat or an axolotl (axolotls: like being alone, require very specific but easy-to-procure stimulus, look like tiny water dragons, sound like fantasy aliens). 

I have very few close brickspace friends, not by design but just because I’m kind of a private homebody, and my extensive network of online friendships is satisfying in that regard. But online friendships, while not LESS of a time commitment, are a different kind of commitment – you can multitask while hanging out with online friends, you don’t have travel times, if they’re running late you’re not stuck waiting and vice versa. 

I also am not in school, which is much more life-consuming than many jobs. School is a way of life; work can be, but doesn’t have to be. And I am very fortunate (in the literal sense of “it is luck that brought me here”) to have a job where I spend the vast majority of my time a) on a computer and b) in self-directed, non-public-facing work. For most of my day, every day, I guide my own workflow, I choose what to work on and when. Of course I have deadlines, but within the strictures of those deadlines I am free to triage my time as appropriate, and because I’m on a computer with unrestricted internet access, I can take ten minutes to log onto tumblr, read some things, respond to some things, and then go back to my work. 

So I am starting from an advantageous position: few personal commitments, unstructured time throughout the day, and a job where when I leave for the day, work stays at work. 

So here’s what a normal day is like for me. Bear in mind this is for comparison purposes rather than because I think it’s particularly ideal.

I wake up around 4am; if I haven’t slept well or feel like I need it, I may go back to sleep for about an hour. Normally when I get up I either work out from 4-5 (weights, running) or I sit on the couch with my laptop and check out what’s been going on while I was asleep. We’ll circle back to this, but I go to bed quite early, so at this point I have generally had at least seven hours of sleep. Also, I am a morning person, so I go straight from zero to lucid, which is nice. 

I answer email, check tumblr, check my RSS feeds (podcasts, news, fanfic, a couple of NSFW blogs that I can’t have on my tumblr feed because I read it at work). I look at my calendar so that I know what’s on offer for the day – my calendar doesn’t cover work stuff, but primarily anything I want to or need to do after work. My family has a mutual Google Calendar that we all use to schedule stuff the others should see, like whenever I take a vacation, and my parents also use it as their central calendar, so I can see what they’ll be up to on any given day. I’ve been thinking of switching over to a private Google Calendar, but out of habit for years I’ve used a custom-built spreadsheet, now in Google Sheets, that looks like a calendar: 

That’s July. This kind of layout works well for me because it’s easy to go in and change things, and I get a good “high level” view of the month. As you can see I’m traveling quite a bit; I’m tracking new TV shows, peoples’ birthdays, events I may attend (I will probably not be at everything happening in evenings on the week of the 10th), baseball games I have tickets for, and possible plans for camping. Google Calendar would work as well and would have some significant advantages, I just haven’t got off my ass to switch over. 

Around five, I usually get up and fix breakfast; often I’ll put on something to listen to while I cook and/or eat. If I’ve been working out, all the stuff I did – checking email, tumblr, etc – is pushed forward, and I do a bit less of it. But essentially from 4-6 I’m working out, eating breakfast, and getting a start on the personal-life aspect of my day. In terms of social media, this is the time I’m most likely to like something or save it to drafts to deal with later; I don’t spend brainpower on responding this early in the morning, usually. 

I have some fairly…prescriptive routines for the rest of the day, and that works for me, I like structure. Other people may find this sort of thing doesn’t work for them, and that’s okay. This is, again, for comparison purposes, not to dictate how your life should be. 

At six o’clock my alarm goes off, warning me that I have nine minutes before I need to stop what I’m doing and start getting ready for work. This is by design, so that I have a buffer zone in which to shift my mental attitudes from morning routine to something more focused. I hit snooze on the alarm and then at 6:09 I turn the alarm off and get in the shower. I shower, brush my teeth, and get dressed in clothes I laid out over a rail the night before (I have an electric heated towel rail, one of the best random-ass things my mother ever gave me, and in winter I turn the heat on so I come out of the shower and into warm undies; in summer it’s just a convenient place to hang clothes). I dress, grab my bag, take my keys off the doorknob and put them in a pocket of the bag, and I’m out the door around 6:25. I catch the 6:40 express bus to work. I usually read on my tablet on the bus (currently reading The Last Runaway by Tracy Chevalier after remembering how much I loved her prose in Girl With A Pearl Earring) and I get to work around 7. 

At work I have routines too: I set down my bag, hang up my jacket, and before I do anything else I get my 32oz mug and go to the kitchen to get ice water to sip on throughout the morning. I come back to my desk, turn on my monitors, and log into my computer. 

I check my work email first, to make sure nothing is on fire from yesterday, since I leave work quite a bit earlier than most of my colleagues. If nothing is urgent I delete anything irrelevant to me, respond to anything that needs immediate response, and move on to a quick glance at email and tumblr, then I open my “daily bookmarks” folder. My daily bookmarks folder is mostly stuff that either I can’t or don’t want to put in my RSS reader: a couple of messageboards, a few real estate sites I’m watching for my dream home to show up, a couple of tumblr tags (I don’t follow tags on tumblr because I don’t like seeing shit recur constantly on my dash), and some activism facebook pages because I despise facebook but it’s the only site some of these organizations use. If it’s Monday, I also open my Monday bookmark folder, which is a combination of sites that rarely update and “event” sites (the cinema I’m a member of so I can see what new movies are coming, the calendar of a local band I like, the events page of various cultural centers). I review these quickly, closing most tabs and setting aside anything I need to look at more indepth like an event I’d like to attend. Usually basically I fuck around on the internet until about 8, unless work has something urgent for me. 

The one scheduled task I have daily at work is news clipping, where I read several news sites and save off articles of interest to our staff, which need to be turned in by mid-morning. Realistically this could take 15 minutes of focused work, but I like to read the news, too, so from eight to eight forty-five or nine, I’m usually reading a very specifically aimed sort of news, saving off articles, and archiving them appropriately. 

After that, the day is, in many ways, mine to do with as I please.

I organize my life by using Google Tasks, which is a little pop-up to-do list in gmail. I have a to-do list for every day, and anything that doesn’t get done one day gets moved to another day, depending on how urgent it is. So at nine or so, I open Google Tasks and start moving each task around based on how urgent it is or how quickly I can do it. Urgent work and fast tasks go at the top; less urgent work, stuff I’m less enthused about, and stuff I can’t do at my desk (buying a card for Father’s Day, picking up groceries after work, etc) goes at the bottom. Some tasks are recurring – every Monday, for example, Radio Free Monday is at the top of the list because it’s time-sensitive. 

You can see RFM there at the top; I have to email some information about a 5K to a friend, but I need to get his email from another friend first; I have some registration and hotel issues to attend to for an upcoming conference; I have to write up some evaluations, and do some reading for a presentation I’m giving. I should stop by my PO Box after work. Other stuff will no doubt be added when I check my work email (documents to be prepared, research requests) but this is where I start the day. You can also see I have stuff with pushed out deadlines – Credit Cards is a monthly reconciliation for my corporate card, which I will do ON the 26th rather than BEFORE it, and quarterly I check my 401K, so I won’t need to do that until August 7th.

“PRESENTATION: Reading” will probably get pushed to another day, because by the time I get down that far on the list, I won’t have a ton of brainpower left to do a lot of reading and analysis. It’s ok, my presentation’s not due until the 30th.

And then I just work through my to-do list. Some days I’m really good at getting it done. Some (rare) days I spend most of my time reading tumblr and fucking around because I’m not having a good focus day. But again: this is a job in which I have the luxury to do that, and I’m very lucky. 

Rather than take a traditional lunch, I usually eat two small meals, at 11am and 2pm. Usually I bring most of my lunch for the week on Monday and just reheat tupperwares as I go, augmenting them with cheese and crackers; sometimes I’ll throw in a protein bar from a stash I keep in a little box on my desk. Most of my lunches are cooked on the weekends, when my time is a lot less structured. You’ve probably seen my COOKING DAY posts; sometimes I just set aside a day to cook and rest.

I’m gonna tackle fandom and social media here because truthfully my job has enough spare time built into it that this is when I do the majority of my fannish activity, at work, in small chunks. And yes I am very active in fandom but occasionally in very limited ways.

I don’t read a ton of fannish blogs. I have a limit on my tumblr of following 99 people, and I choose those people very carefully. Some are friends, but those who aren’t personally known to me are people who post both low-volume and things that are of interest to me. I do not follow people who flood dashes not because I disapprove but because I don’t have time to wade through ten million gifsets of things that I’m not concerned with. I also follow a few artist or writers, but again, only if they’re of relevance to me. I follow Skottie Young because I really like his art and think he’s a cool dude, and most of what he posts is his art. I don’t follow Matt Fraction because while I think he is also a cool dude and I enjoy his writing, his tumblr wasn’t generally speaking about his writing or him, it was aesthetic stuff I didn’t care for and it was A LOT OF IT. 

I don’t read a ton of fanfic. I have a couple of tags fed to my RSS reader and I subscribe to a couple of fics and fic writers, but even then I skim for interesting summaries and tag combinations I don’t find offputting. I don’t read fanfic at work, full stop; when I find one I want to read, I set it aside for a time when I’m at home and feel like reading fanfic.

Throughout the day I will check in on tumblr, in a very systematic manner: I read my dash, only the posts, and like or queue anything I want to reblog or examine later. I read my inbox and try to respond, but some asks don’t get answers for a really long time, because they require more focus or time or whatnot. I read my Activity page and open any reblogs with commentary; I set comments aside to be responded to en mass. I check my likes and try to clean out anything I’ve liked that could go in drafts or queue; I check my drafts and try to move just one draft into my queue (I constantly have a draft backlog). This all takes about ten minutes, then I go back to work.

I get AO3 comment notifications throughout the week, but generally I set aside a block of time either on Friday (if work is slow) or on Sunday to “clear out” my comments; every week I go through my comments, re-read each one, and either delete it or respond to it and then delete it. I don’t reply to a vast majority of them simply because I don’t have the time to respond to each one (I have tried, it was very stressful) and also because most of them don’t really a require a response. For everyone’s patience in this, I thank you.

So work is a long series of multitasking, breaks, deadline work, procrastination. It’s about average, I’d say, with anyone else in my situation. If I’m doing something after work, I check to make sure I know how to get there and what’s going on; if I don’t have all the info I need, I prepare a “brief” that has maps and directions and anything else I need, print that out, and toss it in my messenger bag. And then around 3:45 I pack up my bag, make sure I have my phone, and I head out to either (usually) catch the 4pm express bus home, or catch transit of my choice to whatever I’m doing after work. 

If I don’t have something I’m doing after work, I come home, take my keys out of the bag pocket, hang them up on the doorknob once I’m inside, and set my bag down. I’m very specific about my keys here, as I was up above, as a way of demonstrating that I live a very habitual life. Stuff like keys, phone, wallet always has a specific place it goes, and it stays there if I’m not using it. I used to lose shit a lot, and rigidly adhering to “if this is not in your hand, it should be in X pocket” is what saves me. 

I change into more comfortable clothes, usually yoga pants and a t-shirt. I make something for dinner and eat it, I unpack anything that needs to come out of my bag and pack anything that needs to go into it, and then usually these days I fuck around on the ukulele for a while. I don’t set a time limit on it, so sometimes I do it for half an hour, sometimes for ninety minutes. It’s a way of unwinding and finding stress relief, so it’s entirely voluntary and anything I do during this time is being done because I want to do it. I think it’s the only thing in my life where there are no external pressures anywhere and I have set no goals for myself. 

I don’t think external pressures and goals are inherently bad. The goals I set for myself in my other hobbies, like writing and running, being in fandom, going to movies and such, are good goals and they help me do well. External pressure is something that exists in every human interaction; that’s just the nature of being a person in society, and likewise isn’t a terrible thing. And not everyone needs a release from those things, or finds that release in the same way. I like a lot of my life; I wouldn’t do things if I didn’t like them. But I have found that it helps to have one thing which only belongs to you and which has no goals or benchmarks. For me that’s currently the ukulele. 

In the later evening – and let’s be clear, I get home at like 4:30 so “later” to me is 6ish – I’ll hop back on tumblr, maybe do a little writing, or attend or host a stream. I’ll chatter with people, respond to emails and posts, read things I had set aside for reading earlier in the day; it’s probably my most socially active time.

When I was in my twenties I did perfectly fine on five hours of sleep a night, but as I got older that stopped being comfortable, and also I started realizing that after a certain point in the day, I not only wasn’t doing anything useful or interesting, I wasn’t having a good time. I was being awake for the sake of not going to bed. So I adjusted my life to going to bed at nine, and when I started getting up earlier to run, I adjusted again. In order to do that, I created an evening routine, because going to bed is easier if you start out by doing other shit BEFORE going to bed. 

Now, generally, I log off between 7 and 7:30. Sometimes I go to bed that early, but that’s when I close down social interaction. Not necessarily turning off the computer, but just gently shutting down on being “around” other people. I log off chats, I stop responding to emails and tumblr posts. I set them aside for the morning. I might continue to read my dash or listen to podcasts or whatnot until eight or so. 

I change into pyjamas, wash my face, brush my teeth, lay out my clothes for tomorrow, and get into bed, usually with my tablet to do a little reading. It’s a very rare evening I go to bed any time past 8:30.  And that’s my day.

I have actually some reasoning about why I go to bed so early, but I think it’s the most important part of a post that is REALLY LONG and otherwise devoted to the boring details of my day, so I’m going to make it a separate post. 

I hope this has helped, Anon! As you can see, what helps me organize and sort out all my time commitments is schedules, lists, and an adherence to several fairly rigid habits – this may not work for you, and I don’t recommend it for everyone. But for me, it’s really the only way I can stay on top of everything, especially in cases where I’m dealing with some particularly intense depression. I’m happy to answer questions, though if people have commentary about the post they should remember to reblog or comment, since I don’t repost asks sent to me about other asks.