#it’s somehow always a hoyo fan

[kavehater]

Pffttt imagine getting triggered if someone calls you girl LMFAO

[tabr1-s]

sunday rant and personal frustrations with him that i begun to write at 6am running on an entire 3 and a half hours of sleep (my cats woke me up.....)

(tldr at the end. i might be as bad as Sunday in terms of yap mileage (yappage) but i'll do one better than him and provide you with the concise version if you scroll all the way down.)

i have never felt such intense emotions about a character's moral viewpoint... Ever. and i've liked characters that were mass murderers before. morals (or lack thereof) usually never played a significant role in whether i liked a character or not (unless they did something i considered worse than plain ol murder, then i wouldn't associate with them), and 99% of the time i could find the character's motivations understandable under the circumstances that they were in.

and, technically, i can understand where Sunday is coming from too.

but that doesn't stop me from being Absolutely pissed at him.

(sunday-esque yap about myself incoming, i will eventually get to the point (which i will highlight))

as someone who has been told that i have "ocd features" Multiple times by my psychiatrist (practically each session) i understand the need for control. my obsessiveness manifests in the form of feeling the need to control practically everything - my current obsession for control being my own emotions, which extends to needing to control entire situations, and in turn makes me severely overthink all the possible outcomes to those given situations. i've also been guilty of controlling others before, and having the mentality of "i know what's best for you". hell, i still feel like that a lot, but i really try to push it back.

and this need for "control" is mainly the reason why i even find comfort in fiction. because it's oftentimes very predictable to me (it also made me think of how i do not find any interest in reading books, but i love writing stories of my own. particularly fan-fiction. and the only time i can feel comfortable enough to feel romance is towards fictional characters - because i control the narrative! it's something to think about.). if i like a character or a narrative, it's easy for me to pick apart where the writers will go with that story. and, even if the story turns out to disappoint me/be different than what i hoped for, i would still be Prepared for that possibility.

i somehow... failed to prepare for what would happen with Sunday.

i had set my sights on the wrong thing for 2.2. i invested my whole energy on trying to comfort myself that hoyo wouldn't take the ipc colonialism route (basically turning out to be capitalist/colonialist apologists) with penacony (which i Guess will be explored in 2.3? but now that i have some more context on the story and how it's unraveling i'm not as anxious about it anymore), that i overlooked a lot of other things that could've gone wrong.

namely, my favourite hsr character to be... Like that. (i'm not even being intentionally vague. i'm just dumbfounded)

i had Heard of the theory that Sunday is possessed by Ena (which didn't particularly make sense to me, and i refused to look at leaks concerning Sunday lest they upset me. either way i Really hated that theory. plus, Sunday being said to have ocd would've been an incredibly cheap way to foreshadow that he's "possessed" by the Order. you can't just create your first(?) important/playable character that has a confirmed mental illness and then go "it's okay actually he's Normal! he was just possessed". i took this very personally. and still am.), and saw a lot of theories concerning his involvement with the Order as well. i shut it all out, because i didn't like the implications of that.

which in turn made me Not think/comfort myself regarding the possibilities that he truly Was connected to the Order.

...

well, rest in pieces, me - it's always the things i don't pay much attention to/ignore/fail to think about. which is actually a bit strange because i was not expecting him to be an entirely sane person from the start - he was a politician type, a leader, and a manipulator, to name a few things. that much was obvious. in 2.0-2.1 i wouldn't have been surprised if it turned out that he was the one that "killed" Robin. again, nothing was out of the question. but, 2.1 showed a different side of him. one that cared for his sister and (seemingly) listened to her and cared about what she thought. so they became quite a comforting little sibling duo to me. tragic, yet you could depend on their mutual trust in eachother... or so i thought.

and then he... went and did all That. which just showed me how, despite him caring for his sister, he was still putting other things above her.

to conclude with my yap: in a sense, he is just my "grim reflection of the self". and although i feel sympathetic towards my past self and how naive and selfish i used to be, there are some flaws of mine i will never forgive myself for. and, Sunday, in a way, reminded me of... Everything. it was almost triggering.

(hey, writing this all down in one place helped me calm down! (it's a neverending cycle that will continue tomorrow. all it will take is seeing a post concerning him and his sister and i'll get pissed anew) yay!)

the point(s) (aka my qualms):

- how sunday manipulated robin + was planning to use her in the charmony festival to complete his plan. she was going to be an unwilling participant in creating a "utopia" that she would've been absolutely against, but he didn't stop to fucking. fill her in, maybe? talk it out? the sheer disrespect on the concept of free will and on the fact that your own sister is a human being of her own sickens me

- he should've cherished the relationship he had with her (x1000 because that's the ONE FAMILY MEMBER YOU HAD LEFT AND THAT IS SUCH A PRIVILEGE!!! IMAGINE HAVING SOMEONE CARE ABOUT YOU WHOLEHEARTEDLY AND THEN YOU GO AND THROW IT AWAY!!! YEAH I'VE ALMOST DONE THE SAME EXACT THING MULTIPLE TIMES (AND STILL WOULD) BUT THAT'S WHY I ALSO KNOW HOW MUCH OF AN ASSHOLE MOVE IT IS!!!)

- he forsook his own self and shoved down his own biases and interests (fucking rat. you can't change the fact you're human and i'm very much saying that from experience) to become something Grander than life itself and in fucking turn isolated himself and shut out the one person who actually cared and then had the Gall to complain about being misunderstood/alone. (when you're finally sitting in your unreachable throne in this "dream" that you've created, who will you blame for being lonely? who will you blame when you have no one to fall back into? no one to support you? when everybody you did this for forsakes You?)

- HE DIDN'T EVEN HUG ROBIN BACK AT THE LAST SCENE. LIKE SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR FAILED PLANS AND COME DOWN FROM THE CLOUDS A LITTLE - THE JOY YOU SEEK FOR IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!

- all i hoped for was that sunday and robin would reunite and get the chance to be happy together, and the only true reason i'm mad is because i'm guilty of a lot of the same self sacrificial behaviours as him and very much understand the sentiment of "my loved ones would be better off without my negative presence and influence". but instead of empathizing with him, i feel betrayed. i thought he was better than me. i thought he was someone worthy of admiration, and that doesn't come easily from me. despite all the warning signs i fell for his obvious facade, and i Very rarely get taken by surprise - especially in a way like this.

- if it wasn't for the fact that Robin would feel sad if Sunday died i would personally go and strangle him myself

tldr; i'm just a big baby that placed a lot of faith on Sunday and his relationship with Robin post 2.1 and my ego took a Huge hit once he turned out to be just some immature emo idealist type. (come on, man - i genuinely thought you were better than me! someone worthy of respect! and i usually have a feeling of superiority over others! this was the biggest compliment/act of faith i could give! (talking to a wall (fictional character (I'M FUCKING UPSET))))

[nagisadelune]

Headcanon: Dancing in the Kitchen with Artem

(Definitely not edited)

I didn't create Artem as a character; Hoyo did.

Now, I'm a huge fan of Artem from Tears of Themis (fight me lol). So I figured that I would write a short headcanon I have about him, but this time it'll be in a closer-to-proper writing style. (Post writing: this was definitely not short lol)

If you didn't know, this man is the closest thing I have seen to a malewife: knows how to cook, always takes care of you whenever you're sick, makes sure you are safe. If you can imagine someone taking care of you somehow, he's probably the person to do those things. However, if you play the game, this is basically common knowledge.

For the timeline, imagine that this is after you/Rosa and Artem already got married, and you guys now live together in Artem's current home in game. (Weddings are expensive which makes you broke, okay? We'll get that nice mansion later lol)

⭐⭐⭐

You've already changed into your comfortable clothes for the night after getting back home from work. Today was rough: all the paperwork and investigations really took it out of you. Because of this and the upcoming weekend, you and Artem decided to have an at-home movie date: just you and your man in your pajamas cuddling while watching a movie.

While waiting for Artem to finish changing, you went to the kitchen to collect some snacks for your date. Considering how dark it is in the room, you only turn on the stove light and play some music from your phone for the vibes. It's a Friday, and you need to relieve some stress. What better way to do that than with some music and some good food?

Dancing around in the kitchen and picking out snacks, you fail to notice Artem watching you from the doorframe. It's only when you look for a bowl in one of the cabinets that you finally see him intently watching you while leaning against the doorframe. You freeze mid-motion, one hand reaching for the cabinet and the other holding a bar of dark chocolate. He also seems to freeze when you realizes that you just caught him staring at you.

With an awkward cough to clear your throat, you asked an a small voice, "You just finished?" Hopefully, your question was enough to break the tension and calm the heat rising to your cheeks. With a soft smile and chuckle, he nods and starts approaching you. Your heart begins to race, and you can feel the rapid beat in your throat. Once he's right in front of you, his hand lands on the corner of the counter, and he leans a little on it while he admires your face. "W-What is it?" you manage to stutter out as his hand brushes a stray strand behind your ear.

"You know you're beautiful and really cute, right?" Artem whispers so quietly even you can barely hear him. Because of his comment, you can't make any eye contact with him, and you know for a fact that your cheeks are red. You hear him chuckle again before he leans away from you and grabs your phone from the counter. Your eyes follow his figure as you watch him swipe and type on your phone screen. Trying to see what he is trying to do, you put the chocolate bar down and stand by his side.

"Romantic music playlist?" you read confused before looking up at him. Although his back is towards the light, you can tell his lips are curved slightly upwards. He clicks on a song before placing your phone down again.

"I'm not really feeling a movie tonight," he starts softly, "so maybe we can try something different." Still confused, he reaches over to the stove to turn off the light, and the two of you are left with only moonlight to see anything. The soft notes from your phone starts playing, and you recognize the song; it's the song from your first dance with him. He turns towards you before offering his hand to you. "May I have this dance?" he asks softly as the moonlight highlights the details of his hands. You giggle knowing that he is probably really embarrassed to be suggesting this.

Playing along with a curtsy, you respond, "You may." You place your hand in his, and the warmth in his hands warms you up from the inside. His other hand gently wraps around your waist while your other hand reaches to his shoulder. Despite the darkness of the room, you see his eyes on you which you return. Following the beat of the music, your feet are in sync as he guides you to glide across the hardwood floor of the kitchen. His hand raises up to make you twirl before catching your waist again.

With the song coming to the end, his arms wraps around your waist, and you lean into his body. His familiar scent fills your nose as you gently sway to the beat with him. You can feel the tension in your body slowly melt away while his hand gently holds you against him. With a hand patting your hand softly, you can't help but to close your eyes and enjoy the feeling.

"Does this remind you of our wedding?" Artem asks carefully as his fingers runs through your hair. You nod against his chest and start listening to his heartbeat. Both of your heartbeats seem to sync up, and you release a breath, feeling a weight coming off of your chest. Even without looking at him, you know that his face has the smile he only reserves for you, the soft one which conveys how much he really cherished you. Artem carefully peels you away from his body to have a good look at your face before his hands cups your cheeks. He places a tender kiss on your forehead, and you just feel yourself melting. "I love you," he mutters just loud enough for me to hear.

"I love you too, Artem."

⭐⭐⭐

I hope you liked this! This is the first time that I've written a long headcanon like this, so it might be a little rough around the edges. Hopefully, this put a little smile on your face. See you in the next one!

[ice-and-lightning]

My Three Crazy Yanqing Background Ideas

"It's recorded in the military annals of the Cloud Knights how Jing Yuan came to discover the young boy, stood his ground against public opinion, and incorporated him into the armed forces. However, in the family lineage column, Yanqing's lineage was relegated to the category of unknown."

Is basically all we know about Yanqing's background, so he's very much free reign to come up with ideas for. Although he is most likely just a regular Xianzhou Native kid that Jing Yuan for some reason decided to take care of, I do have three more or less crazy backstory plots for him. Two, I've mentioned before, but thought I'd make a proper background hc post when the third one appeared in my head. So let's dive into it.

1.) Jing Yuan + Abundance

I know there's a fan theory that Yanqing is connected to the Abundance due to his hair colour, themes and decorations etc. What if it wasn't just to the Abundance, but also to Jing Yuan himself? What if he discovered a group of Yaoshi Worshippers during a mission and somehow he stepped straight into an experiment or ritual, from which Yanqing ended up being created: a mix of pure Abundance and Jing Yuan?

2.) Luocha & His Home

Just like Yanqing, we don't know much about Luocha's background. I know he's similar to someone from another HoYo game, but HSR is the only one I've played, so I can only base my opinions on this game.

Anyway, what if Yanqing comes from the same planet as Luocha? We don't know what happened to Luocha's home, just that it seems to have fallen:

He would sometimes think of home. The devils, the church, the insanity… None of those are good memories. People would clamber to high places in groups just so they could witness their city's demise. If everything were to end, then there shall be at least one witness. "Why do you still wear the clothes of your home world?" Someone asked. "It reminds me of the path I must keep treading. That is all," Luocha answered.

Considering he seems to be almost unwillingly following an Abundance path, perhaps it was the Yaoshi Worshipping that brought his home to its demise? What if the Xianzhou Alliance destroyed it and the Luofu was the one leading that attack? In the rubble of the battlefield, he finds a baby and for whatever reason, he decides to bring that baby with him.

We also have this from the same Luocha character story as above quote that seem to indicate that blond hair is not something Xianzhou Natives generally has, but Yanqing does.

"Yeah, Luocha… He's an Outworlder, right? But from the way he works and speaks, he feels like those older Xianzhou natives. Has he lived here for long? But then again, he had kept his unique and exotic fashion style…" "Who knows? Maybe it's because his blond hair doesn't match the clothing of Xianzhou."

And maybe I'm reading too much into this, but since it seems like his clothes is the main reason he's taken for an Outworlder, does this mean that Luocha also looks Asian?

We also have the fact that Luocha has a line about Yanqing and usually the characters only have lines about characters they're connected to. That line is also rather sus with him being all "nope, don't know that boy" while still having a line about him...

"Oh, you mean the young boy? The one who's always by the general? I don't know anything about him…"

Luocha is sus in general, but if Jing Yuan knows that he has a connection to Yanqing, that would automatically make him more on guard with Luocha as well, which we all know he is.

Also, what if whoever or whatever is in that coffin is connected to Yanqing?

3.) Atypical Vidyadhara

This one just very unlikely (not that the other two, especially the first, is very likely either), but I found it a little cute. What if Yanqing isn't a Xianzhou Native, but an atypically looking Vidyadhara? We know that the main visual difference between Xianzhou Native and Vidyadhara are the ears. Since they can be born with illnesses/disabilities, they can probably get born with something affecting their appearance as well. So what if Yanqing is a Vidyadhara who's hatching rebirth somehow didn't go fully right and he was born without those pointed ears and aging differently (since it's implied that Vidyadhara matures slowly while Xianzhou Natives mature at 'regular' speed and then just doesn't change/age, due to how their cells can turn into stem cells when needed and they will always return to their 'default state' aka how their genes are 'scripted' that they should be, which is why they reject implants etc)? What if Jing Yuan or the Cloud Knights had something to do with this disruption and Jing Yuan took care of the baby out of duty at first? I'm fully aware that this hc plot is very silly and very improbable since the Vidyadhara most likely wouldn't let go off one of their young, but I still find it a fun one.

What do I really think about his background?

Yanqing is most likely a war baby. Either his parents got mara-struck and he was left behind or they got killed in a fight among civilians. In all likelihood, besides being a swordsman and military prodigy, Yanqing is just Xianzhou Native boy.

[27thetherealmoon]

Hello. it’s me again! How are you? Sorry it took me ages to write another massage but you know, I was crying (again) a few hours after I send my massage for I fear I have hurt your feelings or upsetting you somehow (Hey, I also have high paranoia) so I’m really glad it wasn’t the case. :)

I love LOVE the Furina you have created. The Furina that subconsciously forgetting her past because it was too hurt to remember. The Furina that cares so much about people who ended up hurting her. The Furina that so beautiful with her white eyelashes and started to loving it and herself . The Furina that still didn’t know there’s people who love her and care for her. The Furina that doesn’t want to be a burden to other people even when she’s dying. The Furina that so strong she finds a new purpose and goes out of her way to finding herself. The Furina that perfectly human and very dear to me (to you as well, it seems). Ahh I would missed her so much. 🥹

Regarding your two reasons, I knew one of it is because your mental health, a quick look at your account proved that and because I’m struggling with mental health issues too, I understand. If writing Furina in her lowest point effecting you negatively then it was a wise decision to take a break from continuing the story or distancing yourself from it. Your mental health and happiness matter more. but I just can’t stand by and watch the author of my favorite story belittling her own work in her profile like that, that’s why I came here – to give you piece of my mind.

And to your second reason, no, you’re not pathetic for hating hoyo. I’m a twitter girl (I rarely ever used tumblr anymore, actually) but I also hate hoyo as a company (like, screw you hoyo!). I know hoyo has been a HUGE disappointment after disappointment lately, especially with the whitewash of Natlan characters. but trust me when I said that most of twitter people also doesn’t like them, and have been very vocal about it (at least that’s what I always seen in my timeline). Though, in gi twitter fandom – from what I’ve noticed – is that most of them is aware that hoyo’s a shitty company but they also acknowledge, and bitterly accepting the fact that they complains wouldn’t be heard and the company would never change. Only the CN fandom can. And they have a mindset that it’s okay to enjoy something while also criticizing them, in hope that the company would her you and changes. It doesn’t make you a hypocrite, I promise.

Me myself haven’t played the game for few months now because the story got so boring after 4.2 AQ and because Hoyo. But I never once thought that me making nvfr fanarts was me supporting Hoyo as company. That’s a very interesting way to think about fan works honestly. I’m making nvfr fanarts simply because I love them. be it as their own characters and together as a ship. In return, they improved me, like a lot. My love for them motivated me to draw them more and improved my drawing skills. They prompted me to share my works with the fandom, which I still feel very insecure about every time I posted my arts. and they introduced me to a lot of kind people in the community– I even finally make some mutuals there ehe. In the end though, I draw them for myself. not for hoyo, not for the community, just for me, because I love them.

It’s funny, because everything that you said that makes you frustrated of mihoyo is what make your story special. your hard works to make sure everything was represented right and the details you put through in your story, that hoyo didn’t bother with, was obvious and very much amazing. Not only hoyo as a company, but I rarely ever find a story that goes into details about language differences, foods, clothes, heck even skin care! You’re the only one who bother to put skin care in your fic (at least from all nvfr fanfics I have ever read). And trust me, all your hard work was very much appreciated by me and everyone who read your story.

As much as I want to know more about tphh, I also want to move on from them. Seeing them in my bookmarks still hurt you know. It’s not helping that you didn’t change the moderate your comments options before you orphaned the story. Now every new comment wouldn’t reach anyone and goes straight to the archive. In fact, I left a comment there before I came here because I knew my massage won’t reach you. And I’m sure I’m not the only one who left comment for I know there are still many people who love tphh, even bookmarked them, despite knowing the story would forever unfinished.

You already spoiled tphh a lot if you asked me and I’m afraid my curiosity and enthusiasm wouldn’t be sated if I was to ask more spoiler from you, hence I couldn’t move on. But there is one thing that still gnawing at my brain, like how do you planning Neuvillette finds out Furina is gone? because your story was so different from others runaway or lost Furina’s stories that I can’t imagine how your Neuvillette gonna know. And if Clorinde’s reaction already makes me cry a river, I can only imagine Neuvillette’s would be a heart-wrenching one, if not more. As for future chapters, just knowing Furina would heals and find so much love is enough for me. 🤍

Lastly, I wished, like how Furina’s story goes in your mind, that your stories, too, would go to the same direction. That you wouldn’t feel insecure when you uploaded your works to the fandom and that you would heal and be better. 🤍

P.s. I’m too shy and awkward when it comes to direct conversation (heck I need days to write this massage only and because English isn’t my first language either) so I would left this massage in your ask box, if you don’t mind! Also, sorry for the wall of messy text.

P.s. 2: I always thought your username was spelled 27-the-the-real-moon and it turns out it is spelled 27th-ethereal-moon. What a beautiful username 🥺

Hi!! I'm so happy to hear from you again! I'm doing alright atm. How are you?

Don't worry, your message definitely didn't hurt my feelings. I was actually really happy to hear from someone after I orphaned TPHH. I honestly kind of assumed people would just... not really care much? So the fact that you cared enough to find my tumblr and message me really touched me, as did your words.

I really love the way you described TPHH Furina. It's honestly kind of crazy to me how much of the character I wanted to build is already in the fic because it feels a bit like I cut the story off right at the start before anything could really happen, but your words made me realise that a lot of who she is and who she would develop into is already there. I'm honestly kind of proud of myself for that, which is a very weird feeling because I usually don't feel like this.

I can't lie that "a quick look at your account proved that" made me laugh for five whole minutes. What gave it away? 💀 I'm not gonna go into too much detail here because it makes people quite uncomfortable, but I feel the need to elaborate a bit.

One big mistake a lot of writers make is drawing too much from personal experience and putting too much of themselves into their story and it's a mistake I make with every story I write as well.

Hibernaculum is tied to my weird relationship with my family, specifically my father and my brother but also my mother. It's a very easy thing to write about (for me at least) because most of this is far in the past and I've worked through a lot of it. I understand what happened, have an idea why these things happened, and I have a good idea of how things will continue to affect me in the future.

The Perfect Human Heart is tied to struggles I have had my whole life, struggles that haunt me right now and will probably continue to haunt me until I'm dead, but in ways and for reasons that I don't understand, can't predict and can't work through at all considering how my life is currently going. So sitting down and writing about a Furina who's plagued by familiar thoughts (for different reasons) became very personal and overwhelming very quickly and also became very taxing for me. It would probably take me years to get to a state where I could actually write for TPHH (specifically writing out Furina's thoughts and problems) without risking my own health like I have in the past few months. I could've probably predicted this, but oh well.

Thank you for giving me a piece of your mind. I appreciate it.

What really got me alongside the whole Natlan whitewashing bullshit was that one GGZ ad (idk if you knew this but the game still exists in china and I think japan?) with a bunch of little girls in bathing suits bending over, spreading their legs, covered in tentacles etc. Like... Hoyo sucks so much. And in so many different ways, too. It would be impressive if it wasn't so incredibly sad and upsetting. It also attracts very weird people, specifically the people who used to make fun of genshin players who now suddenly support genshin, hsr and especially zzz because hoyo isn't "woke", which makes online discussions about the games and any form of criticism aimed at hoyo as a company basically impossible. Being in fandoms at all right now is incredibly exhausting and kind of miserable and it takes the fun out of things (that's the one beautiful thing about the naruto fandom tbh. It doesn't change. No matter how much time passes, the discourse always stays the same as if it was cursed to be frozen in time in 2014).

I've never been great with the whole "separate the art from the artist" thing. Sometimes I can do it pretty well(ish) and sometimes I can't do it at all. I did a decent job at it after Sumeru released because I simply stopped spending money on genshin or any other hoyo game and focused on supporting artists who represented sumeru more accurately. Then, when I started to plan out TPHH, I swore that I would be one of the artists who worked hard to depict these countries more accurately by doing ny very best to research every country that is supposed to be represented in these nations as much as possible. And that also worked for a bit, but it didn't really fix the underlying issue of me really beginning to resent hoyo. I already talked about this in my last answer, so I'm not going to repeat myself, but you know what I mean. Hoyo kept fucking things up and in the process of trying to fix it for tphh I realised how easy it can be to not fuck up completely and that made me resent the game more and more.

I think the whole "fanworks to some extent always means supporting the company/the artist" thing that is buried in my head and haunts every piece of fanwork that I post comes from JKR and the way she has talked about harry potter fans and how she sees them now, but it's also more complicated than that. It has to be because Kishimoto isn't a great person either, but I haven't axed Hibernaculum yet. Maybe I'm just a giant hypocrite idk.

I used to be really active in the fandom as well and I really wanted to interact more with artists and fan accounts (I used to look at neuvifuri fanart to motivate myself to write) but I never ended up doing it (because I don't know how to talk to people but also somehow talk way too much, as you can see). It's a nice space, and I miss how much fun everyone was having when they came up with theories between 4.0 and 4.2. It was a cool space. I really loved those long threads people were making on Twitter about furinas lore and where it might go. It was fun. I haven't really interacted much with the fandom since I axed TPHH but the few things I've seen make it seem like the fandom really cooled down a lot, probably because hoyos repeated fuck ups put everyone in a weird mood and that's just really sad to see (and obviously because Fontaine is no longer the main focus right now because I think the natlan patch is out now? Idk I haven't played in months either).

The small details were honestly my favourite parts to write in this fic. Talking about how languages change and develop and how Furina still speaks a lot of languages that have died out (or are currently in the process of dying out because standart teyvat is getting more and more popular in pretty much all of the nations, pushing the languages there out of the way) or have become almost unrecognizable in the last 500 years as an example was really fun. People always talk about how Furina is 500 years old, but they never talk about how much things change in 5 centuries. Yes, she is/was one of the youngest archons (probably, I don't think we ever found out how old she actually is if you count human years + oceanid years), but 500 years is so much fucking time. So many things that you'd think are eternal will crumble in that time, and so many things that you thought will crumble stay untouched. Skincare formulas change for the worse, clothing, hairstyles, makeup, and even furniture go in and out of fashion, city layouts shift, houses collapse, etc. The world Furina saw when she was first brought into that world is in a lot of ways entirely different than the world she lives in now and I kind of wish people focused on this stuff more so I tried my best to implement that to the best of my abilities. Also the differences in culture in different countries and regions is one of the most interesting things about travelling so writing about it was genuinely awesome. What foods are more popular in different nations and regions (I think I mentioned that the people of Fontaine eat a lot more fish than as an example Liyue? I'm not sure) and other cultural differences like Liyue producing better skin care than Fontaine was such a fun thing to come up with and something that I did in an attempt to breathe a bit more life into the world, so to hear that that worked makes me really happy.

The comment thing you mentioned is actually quite strange because I remember approving all comments, then going into settings to turn off comment moderation, saving it, and then going to orphan the fic. Like, I definitely remember doing that. I wanted to make sure that people could voice their frustrations without having to tell me directly because I know a lot of people aren't comfortable with talking to people directly like this. I *know* that I did that. Then again I also had to change the settings on Hibernaculum like three times because it kept changing it back to "only registered users can comment" even after I changed it to all users (and saved it! I save it every time I swear that's not the problem. I check this stuff obsessively!). Ao3 is really weird right now, at least for me, and I have no idea why.

How Neuvillette finds out is actually kind of a complicated story point (because everything I write is kind of complicated for some reason), but I'll try to keep it short:

First thing you need to know is that Neuvillette wanted to give Furina a Vision (like a month after the flood while she was rotting away in her house) and planned to use that vision as a reason/excuse to visit her (because he thought she didn't want to see him but if he was there to give her something like a vision she would *have* to open her door, right?). However, no matter how much Neuvillette tried, he couldn't manifest a vision for her. He could make one for other people and they work well too, but he couldn't do it for her (he thinks it's some punishment from the heavens or something and tries to do research in the whole thing but it's actually because having a wish/an ambition is what makes the creation of a vision possible and Furina at that point wishes for nothing at all, so she literally doesn't have that spark that would tie the vision to her and make it uniquely hers, which is why Neuvillette can't make her one.)

The second thing to know is that Furina is getting sicker and sicker the further she gets away from Fontaine. Baizhu has no idea why and she starts living and helping out at the apothecary until Zhongi recommends that she should meditate close to the water, like a lake or the ocean or something, because that might improve at least her mental state (he's full of shit, he knows that she used to be an oceanid and that oceanids get sick for a while when they distance themselves from fontaines waters and remembers that hanging out around water used to help with the symptoms of her illness before she ascended. He simply assumes that that illness stayed with her even after she was turned human). She listens to him and starts to read and meditate close by the harbour to enjoy the ocean. One day, when she meditates, she tries to really centre herself and connect to the world and find inner peace and ends up actually connecting to the waters in Liyue.

I kind of romanticised/imagined the powers oceanids have as something divorced from the power of the sovereign in a way. That they have an extra spark of something in them, something unique stemming from egeria or from the shade of life, which makes them an independent force that can't be controlled by the Hydro Archon or by neuvillette (kind of as an explanation for why furina didn't order them to come back/couldn't order them to return when they rebelled/left while she was still pretending to be a little dramatic tyrant archon). That means that Furina had her own powers before she split herself and created a human vessel, and her tapping back into them despite officially being human would show that she still has that spark from her mother in her even though she's now human. Like a "despite everything it's still you" moment, even if she doesn't understand it as that in that moment (because she doesn't really understand what's happening at all due to her missing memories).

Neuvillette would feel that moment when she connects to the waters for the first time in several centuries, and while he wouldn't be able to tell where she is in the world he'd know that she felt too distant to be in fontaine (and because this fic was planned before the lantern rite he also wouldn't be able to leave fontaine because thats what a lot of people assumed before that because his presence was keeping ousia and pneuma stable, but oh well). The little spark of Furinas presence in the waters of teyvat would flicker back out (because she simply wouldn't be strong enough at that moment to hold it for longer than a few seconds and she'd be scared that she's capable of making that type of connection in the first place) and Neuvillette would go to Furinas house to check if she's really gone because he can't believe it. He would find both Chlorinde and Wriothesley there who both took vacation from their jobs because "the effects of the flood finally caught up to them too and they need a break" and he finds out that both of them believe that Furina got kidnapped or murdered by the fatui because they found evidence that she had contact to dilucs anti fatui spy network and sent him info that her own spy network collected (you know, the one that canon kind of forgot about after mentioning it once at the start of the game) and that shes been gone for like... a while now. Neuvillette realises that Furina connection didn't feel like the way humans with visions connect to the waters of Teyvat (and remembers that he also never managed to give her one anyways) and freaks out because something odd is clearly happening to furina, she might be kidnapped or something, she's too far away for him to find and protect her or help her in any way, and he can't leave to track her down either. She's unreachable for him and possibly suffering (she's kind of freaked out sitting at the harbour and trying to connect to the waters again but doesn't quite manage it) and he's powerless to stop any of it despite reclaiming his sovereignty. And then he proceeds to have like... ten panic attacks at the same time and Wriothesleys prophecy comes true and it floods fontaine again (not as bad as the actual big flood obviously but like basements are filling up, the aquabuses are unusable etc).

That's how he finds out. Through Furina making progress in her quest of finding out who she is. It is a very Furina-centric fic, so it was important to me that Furina made these steps on her own while Neuvillette is forced to stay still and let her do these things, only able to provide minimal support and hope that after her journey is over she will find her way back home while working through what he feels for Furina (obviously fondness and romance) and how that differs from what other people like Chlorinde feel for her (familial love for someone who is somehow a sister, a mother, a grandmother but also a(n ex) god at the same time).

I honestly doubt that I'll ever get over my insecurities concerning my own writing, but I'll try my best, I promise. Also, never apologise for big walls of text. Really, I should be the one apologising for this absolute monster of a response. I'm incredibly thankful for your words and that you chose to share them with me, so please don't feel bad about this. It makes me really happy to hear from others. Thank you, seriously, for taking time out of your day to share these thoughts with me.

Omg I'm seeing it now it does look like 27 the the real moon I never noticed that! 💀 😭

[zuffer-weird-girl]

*me remembering that I promised a scenario of a drunk Chisaki* oH FUC-!

One or three bottles of sake

You were simply messing around in your phone, snickering at seing other people do shit on the internet before you heard a knock... which is weird since you were in the living room... not the bedroom.

"Excuse me? (Y/n)-sama?" The man asked hushed while you giggled at his exaggerate manners.

"Tengai I told you already about the formalities!" You smiled and put your phone down to look at the man "Just call me by my name, really is okay!"

"I apologize for this." The huffed a smile while scratching the back of his neck before returning to a serious expression "Pardon about bothering you in such a hour at the night... but could you accompany me please?"

You nodded and followed the calm man through the halls.

"Something wrong?" Tengai sigjed loudly before scracthing the back of his head again.

"Sadly. You see, the eight precepts, Chrono and Mimic were reunited on a room and that thug Rappa just brought along with Deidoro some alcohol drinks... To celebrate or just drink the night off or something similiar."

You snickered a bit, gulping down immediately after Tengai arched his eyebrow at you before returning to his explanation.

"Anyway. I refused since I'm not much a fan of alcohol in general. But the rest was the opposite... Master Overhaul got them on the act and went to stop that nonsense before Rappa just made one mistake..."

You started to grow worried before Tengai opened one door to reveal a bunch of drunk mens while you saw your boyfriend.... chugging and hitting the cup on teh cofee table as Chrono and Mimic shouted 'TAKE THAT' at a screaming Rappa.

You blinked once before looking at Tengai with wide eyes while pointing in disbelief at the scene in front of you.

"Yes... Rappa spoke something about master 'being a wimp on drinks or something, how would you be dissapointed at seing that your man didn't take one drink and that what type of yakusa boss he was if he didn't even could drink a cup of saque."

You returned your look at Chisaki who had the same stoic face as usual but the difference it was that his golden eyes were puffy and his uncovered cheeks were slightly pink.

"H-How much..?" You asked, giggling about at the way Chisaki miserably tried to slap Chrono's hand away form his back.

"When I left it was already gone one bottle... now?" He looked at the pile of empty bottles "I am afraid to know."

Suddenly Mimic snickered and while looking at you both extending his arms.

"Look at who decided to fucking join us! tEnGAI BiTcH GEt YoUR AsS DoWN AnD GeT DrUnK As WeLL!"

"I'll pass..." Tengai growled before glaring at Rappa for shouting that he was being a wimp.

"FinE ParTy BooMEr! (Y/N)! Go SiT YoUR AsS doWn thEn By OvErHaUL's SiDE anD FuCkInG DrInk!"

At the mention of your name the eyes of your lover widen just a bit before he drubkly looked up at his front... you were at his side...

"(Y/n)..? Wh..where the fuck is her?" He muttered while Deidoro left out a drunk laugh as he falled into his back at the ground.

"THE BOSS IS REALLY FUCKING DRUNK!"

"Tell the time then fucker." Setsuno snickered before juggling his cup.

"SHUt up midget!" Deidoro lifted up and pointed at a clock in the wall and screamed at it "THE BOSS IS REALLY FUCKING DRUNK!"

Hoyo spitted om his drink by his laughter while Chrono stood, a bit trembling, on his feet and cane to you.

"We fucked up.. sorry." He half smirked before almost dropping before you helped him out.

"For crying out loud how many drinks did you all had?!" You whispered shouted while Chrono showed one finger while muttering a 'bottle'.

And... everyone wasn't much different... excluding Chisaki who somehow was still searching for you and surprisingly didn't found it.

"Mimic you fucking liar, my angel isn't here." He growled before grunting when he just bumped his forehead on the table.

"Am FuCKInG NoT! THe ChiCk Is RighT TheRe!" Mimic pointed angrily at you while you could only deadpan.

"Alright." You started, accidentaly letting Kurono fall.. he at least made a thumbs up to tell you he was alright when you yelped "Everyone. Out. Night time for all of you."

You were so grateful that you had the respect of those man, or else it would probably take AGES for them to listened to you...

You stopped Nemoto though, being one of the last to leave, and pointed at Chisaki... lost look as he stared at his front.

"How many did he had Nemoto?"

"About (hic) three bottles. Rappa challenged him so..(hic) you knwo how master is."

You sigjjed and thanked the man, slowly going into his side to bring a hand to touch his shoulder before he slapped it away.

"Don't touch me filth... only one person can do that and is not fucking you so out." He mumbled, still not looking at you as he tried to get up... tried.

"Uh? Who?"

"Not your fucking business but is my (Y/n)." He growled before hiccupping "The sweetest and the most beautiful thing on this sick world and my angel is the fucking bes-" he tripped on his own foot and dropped to his knees with a hiss.

You blushed at his words... normally drunk people werent on their right mind but they never spoke lies... especially your Chisaki. You knew how he was reserved but those sweet words he almost never let out.

"I am all that?" He looked up to send you a glare before widening his eyes at sieng your blushing and smiling figurine.

"Angel..." he smiled a bit, surprisingly standing up and accepting your help "Since when you're here?"

"Not too long. Why?"

"I was going to kill some filth shit in this room.. but is all gone because you're here.." he sluttered before dropping his head on teh crook of your neck "My angel is the best..." he cooed before nuzzling his face into your neck.

Oh god what was happening?! Was this what too much of alcohol did to your boyfriend?!

He grunted a bit before mumbling in your skin.

"You're not hugging me back (Y/n).. did I do something?" You went to look at him befor eyou noice he was POUTING.

CHISAKI KAI. OVERHAUL. LEADER OF THE YAKUSA. IS POUTING. AND IT WAS ADORABLE.

"No no!" You immediate answered, waving your hands a bit "I-Is just tha-"

He grabbed your hand weekly and kissed your palm before nuzzling his face on it.

Dear lord what was happening with him?!

"My angel..." he cooed in your hand before hugging you again "I missed you..." he said a bit more sleepy while your heart was almost combusting at this overwhelming event.

"U-uh.. K-Kai how about some water then we can go to bed?"

He nodded in your neck, grunting in disaproval at losing his warmth and just blindly following you through the house... at least he had his hand on yours.

Pops was just getting to his room before he spotted you two.

"Good night you two." He smiled at your gretting but frowned at sieng his successor "Chisaki my boy, are you alright? You look a bit.. flustered?"

Chisaaki let out a chuckle before wrapping his arms around your waist and rubbing his cheek on yours, you with wide eyes and face burning form embarrassment.

"Nothing. Just my (Y/n) giving me her warmth... my angel is so warm..." he buries his nose, missing the wide eyes of his father figurine and his lover looking at him in shock "I just love it since I'm always so cold and is also soft..." he sighed in bliss at finding some comfortable position and just remained like that.

You gagged before looking at Pops, same wide eyes as you had on that moment while looking back at you.

He pointed a finger to your boyfriend and you sighed in defeat.

"Saque. 3 bottles." The elder arched a eyebrow before returning to see Chisaki nuzzling even more his nose on your neck and burring right in your ear.

"Well. What alcohol does with a man.." he smirked a bit at seing his adopted son attempting to growl at seing that your attention wasn't on him "Think you can take care of my boy for the night (Y/n)?"

"I'll try my best." You giggled, replying the good night Pops gave to you and smilling like a dork when Chisaki said something with the word 'father' on it.

"Alright my devil. Let's get you to bed." He grunted before tightening his hold on you.

"I'm not a infant (Y/n)..." he muttered but complied anyway while following you to his room.

He took the seat down with a yawn and hic up before he smirked dreamily when you helped him on taking off his shirt.

"Naughty little angel we have..."

"Ahaha.. no mister. You're way too drunk." You laughes and mockingly pointed at finger at his nose.

Although you yelped a bit at the nibble he manage to do in your finger.

"Kai!" He smirked devilish back at the call of his name before you giggled and rolled your eyes, going to the bathroom for wash your face before you felt a tug in you clothing.

"Wh.. where are you going?" You went to answer but the way his voice sounded so.. broken and fearful made you worry "Don't.. don't leave me alone angel.. please?"

"I was only going to wash my face to go to bed Kai..." you stopped in your tracks to carress his face with your thumbs "How could I leave you for real anyway?"

"You should." He hiccuped, eyes darkening a bit "Because I'm fucked up."

"No you're not!"

"I am.. like.. you-you're just the pool of sweetest and brightness" he pointed at you with his pam before plopping down "Then we have this demon here, the total opposite of you... but I am selfish.." he muttered the last part before burring in your stomach.

"I want you with me... only with me..." he juzzled in hour tummy before looking up at you. "Promise..."

"Promise what my devil?"

"Promise that you wont leave me in the dirty like some people did already.."

You made a hurt face before carresing his looks, giggling at the vibrations that the pleased sounds he made were making shivers crawl down your spine.

He suddenly groaned, burrowing his face even more on you while you poked him and ask what happened.

"Fuck that piece of shit Rappa now tommorow I'm going to have a headache... fuuuucck i wanna kill him.."

You giggle, hoping that tommorow his hangover wasn't going to be that painful...