#it’s scenes like this that bludgeon you with humanity amidst all the unreal fantastical elements and bring you back to these shows
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don’t even look at me if you wouldn’t consider sealing yourself in an ice coffin with me to stay by my side should I suffer an untimely death 😩
#till the end of the moon#tteotm#ranting#luo yunxi you fucking GOD - the way he speaks to and holds her corpse in both scenes. denial. desperation. fear. disbelief. the trembling.#his face walking up to her coffin and subsequent rage and protectiveness with qingyu over both her and their relationship#no matter how many times she said her purpose was to kill him he still believes they loved each other and refuses anything else#the bracelet sequence the face nuzzle the mirthful laughter#he can’t bear to lose her and he has no idea where to direct his overwhelming pain and sadness despite their conflicts#after all what’s grief but all the love still left to give. he has lost ppl before but not like this#there’s prolly a fair amount of guilt and self hatred underlying everything too#all he's done these last eps is try to hold on to her in every way - with every shred of his being - but none of it worked#‘just say one word please’ ‘you’re really hateful’ AAHHHH#his injured hands shaking her as if things are normal. later tucking her hand in gently as if not to wake her despite the truth.#he's lost all sense of self and purpose. his grasp on reality is hanging by a thin fucking thread#he will gladly live in his delusion & try to stay by her side. even in death. even when she didn't want it.#he can't go on w/o her anymore - doesn't know how. she has fundamentally changed him.#(so much that he even fights the devil god voice in her defense 🙏)#it’s scenes like this that bludgeon you with humanity amidst all the unreal fantastical elements and bring you back to these shows#omg I’m remembering his fixation on her not looking at him with ttml before - boy was already going insane w/o her when she was still there#healthy attachment and coping? ttj doesn't know her 😌#like idk if he fucks her corpse in the novel but props to lyx I’d fucking believe it#and once again nian baiyu is not paid nearly enough for any of this
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