#it’s not the jobs fault tho it’s actually mine lmao | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

aerltarg · 3 years ago

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2, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 26, 27 from ask game

2. Are there any popular fandom OTPs you only BroTP?

oh, it's actually hard to answer bc pretty often my otps can work as brotps for me as well. it also means that when i can't ship some characters they don't work for me as friends either. not to mention that in asoiaf i'm open to many ships, and if i'm not very passionate about some it's not a sign i can't see them in romantic light.

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

may i say any sansa ship? 😭 as well as sansa herself lmao. idk generally i can't ship characters i don't like because i'm just not interested. and it's not to say i don't like book!sansa (show!sansa is another case 💀), i just don't find her arc as intriguing and epic as arcs of some other characters. however, it's absolutely her obnoxious fandom's fault that i don't want to touch anything about her now, pairings including. sansaery? pass. sansan? i used to have a soft spot for them in my heart but now? nah. sansa x anyone? pls have mercy, she's already a fandom bicycle.

and jonsa ofc. i would never mind some crack ship as i do this one if not for their obnoxious stans that did way too much to list there right now. but this burning desire to persuade every rock on the street that your crack ship is canon will never stop being ridiculous lmao

also braime. tbh i used to low-key like them but some of their stans weirded my away lol. i get that not all of them are like that but still. it's generally my great pain when i see braime/brienne/jaime stans who are also dany/targ antis. every time i see them i cackle and run away as fast as i can crying from disappointment lmao. it's really a pity because i'm either very neutral or like in my own way all three of them.

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

jonrya it is! i never hated them, you know, but they never were more than siblings and brotp to me. however, later i encountered the deluded crack ship fandom that shall not be named and understood that if there is any possible romance for jon with any of his sisters-cousins we all know which one it will be lmao. also their stans are very sweet and i really like many of their takes on arya and jon! i generally love relationships of jon and arya very much so it wasn't that difficult in practice to see them in a quite different light.

7. Is there anything you used to like but can't stand now?

meta culture lmao. reading different analysis and interpretations of the text used to be very interesting to me (and still is tbh but in other fandoms) though asoiaf is a different case. imo many people aren't honest in their so called theories and analyses. i get that all of us are biased but some "meta writers'" denial of their own biases influence fandom in a bad way. it looks like too many people run to them to get answers to their questions about any minor detail as if they were grrm himself. yk instead of using their own reading comprehension lmao. you see how this meta culture ruined fandom just looking at the most delusional stans and shippers who spread their agenda by writing endless text posts full of nonsense and bullshit but styled as oh so intellectual and thoughtful analysis. it's insane how many people actually buy it and don't check canon accuracy of such claims themselves. it got to the ridiculous point when random people try to argue with you with some far-fetched embarrassing "theories" as if they were canon facts or quotes straight up from a fanfic because they read somewhere some other confused soul's post and got from a context that this quote is canon (despite the fact that it wasn't written in grrm's style at all but some people can't use their brains even if their lives depended on it it seems).

anyway it's become too long and rambly already so tldr. because of such "neutral unbiased" analyses i got the habit of fact checking almost everything i see in such posts. there's only a small amount of meta writers from targ/dany/jon/arya stans that i trust because i know by practice and following them for some time that they don't pull anything out of nowhere, back up everything they say with canon quotes, don't decontextualize anything and (that is the most important thing to me) are reasonable and open to discussion unlike so many bnfs nowadays.

8. Have you received anon hate? What about?

ah, not in this fandom yet, god bless! i think i'm not loud enough for the needed amount of time to deserve it lol. but since i'm not going anywhere soon maybe one day i will 😂

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why?

robert baratheon and tywin lannister, obviously. tbh it's pretty hard for me to hate any characters because you know. they're fictional lmao. just lines on paper, they can't hurt you. and even such dudes as tywin or robert don't get real distaste from me if they're written well enough. my problem with them lies not only in their canon crimes and shitty consequences of those but in fandom's (or at least some parts of it) unwillingness to acknowledge that they're canonically written as shitty, not as stan/pity/worship material. tywin isn't as clever as some think and robert is a coward outside of battlefield, not to mention some absolutely disgusting denial of his nature from targ antis only because the man happened to be the most vocal targ hater in-universe so these folks feel like he is their main book representative and whitewash him completely lmao

10. Most disliked arc? Why?

uugh idk even. i'm either low-key interested (or used to be at least so i can stay pretty neutral for the sake of nostalgia lol) or too indifferent to really care.

11. Is there an unpopular character you like that the fandom doesn't? Why?

all my faves have their own crowd of haters i'm afraid 😭 but let me say rhaegar. even among some dany/targ stans my man is so misunderstood lmao. it's not even his fault i dare say it's fanon about his half-imagined crimes that somehow got widespread to the unbelievable degree. and when i say they're half-imagined i'm being very generous actually. ofc he isn't perfect, no one in asoiaf is. and yes, he's a pre-series dead minor character but almost all little information about him is actually positive, not to mention the narrative itself that doesn't paint him as a villain or just a shitty dude. on the contrary, he's an idealized to some degree dead prince who could've been a good king (like some other historical targaryens, jacaerys, baelor breakspear, aemon son of jaehaerys, etc.), a mysterious yet tragic figure. i have much to say about why it's so popular to shit on him in fandom but yeah. his haters should send their complaints to grrm instead, no one forced the man to write him like that lol. and i mean that no one has to like him ofc. but it's misinterpretation of the text to claim he was intentionally written as a villain or smth by grrm.

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn't? Why?

i don't know if it counts as unpopular but i would say tyrion's arc as a whole because i enjoy his character and like in my own way. i can get why some people don't like him but this man will always have his own place in my heart i must admit.

13. Unpopular opinion about XXX character?

is this unpopular tho?.. ok but renly wouldn't make a terrible king. i dare say he would be better than both robert and stannis. yes, he wasn't shown as perfect and i don't claim this. he wouldn't be the best or the most brilliant or the most just or noble. yet still better than his brothers. his flaws weren't anything other high lords didn't have, his mistakes weren't anything other lords and kings didn't do. in many ways he would make a better job than robert or stannis, too bad he died so early, even though i get why it was important for the narrative.

26. Most shippable character?

well generally for me it's the ones i love the most lol. jonerys/snowstorm is my never dying otp but i admit my sins, sometimes i just see dany with other characters (often from other fandoms pls don't @ me). however, since dany is THE fave of mine it means i would rather twist the other guy or girl to fit into the good match for her than twist her for another character in my new born crack ship lol. and i never stay for too long with the ships with which i feel they don't really fit and don't do justice for each other lol. maybe that's the reason i'm not much of a rare shipper / crack shipper afshdjdb

27. Least shippable character?

everyone i don't like? 😭 as i've said sansa for the reasons above lol. you can insert many others in her place lmao

#thanks for the ask!#.txt #mypost #ask game #anonymous #*answered

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loseyoutoloveme · 4 years ago

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will you do a song by song review for life support? i really liked the ones for sweetener and thank you next!

oh absolutely, i’d love to! thank you for asking and being interested 🖤 all thoughts below.

the beginning:

this was such a great way to open this album, it’s so cinematic and really sets the mood so perfectly. one of my fav instrumental intros i’ve ever heard.

9/10

good in goodbye: “you put the over in lover, put the ex in next.”

the lyrics are so wonderfully corny and i’ll love this song forever, like the chorus is literally just so fun to sing along to.

i do think it feels a little... shallow compared to the rest of the album, and the album being released so long after this song came out makes it feel disconnected from the rest. but i love it so i don’t care.

7.5/10

default: “i know, i know this must be coming for me, i swear, i swear i will be the end of me, the end of me.”

this song is just sooo...... OUCH!

i’m obsessed with the way the chorus just SOUNDS like an emotional spiral, like her life falling apart, like falling into a deep depression, and then the outro builds like destructive racing thoughts.

also i never noticed the wave crashing and the bubbles at the very beginning until really recently, and i love that little touch. the whole song feels so underwater. cloudy and fuzzy. it does a good job of depicting certain symptoms of various mental illnesses.

8.5/10

follow the white rabbit: “is it haunting, baby, that i’m wanting, baby, that i’m wanting, wanting you?”

i actually was fully not expecting to like this that much based off the snippets she’d shared, but omg this left me WEAAAAK on first listen, which was the best surprise

there are definitely so many layers to these lyrics too, despite it being just a bombastic sexy toxic love song on its surface, particularly when thinking about the album as a commentary on mental illness, and some of the breakup/love songs as metaphors rather than straightforward love songs. definitely about infatuation and toxicity and perhaps knowingly entering a bad relationship as a bad coping mechanism, a way to avoid dealing with your pain or (as we see in effortlessly) a way to just feel anything at all.

9/10

effortlessly: “i hold my breath to breathe, hurt me so i feel, used to do these things so effortlessly somehow.”

oh god this song is just a punch in the stomach

i ALSO didn’t really expect to love this one based on snippets but the lyrics are just devastating and perfect and i hope speak to anybody who has struggled with self-harm and medication.

i don’t even have thoughts on this song, it just makes me go jsn*@(#nkdasdnkasd7*@U#j2k3n

love that this is such a fan favourite. it deserves!

10/10

stay numb and carry on: “truth is it was never love, your fault if you thought it was.”

the reverse “i’ve become emotionless” at the beginning >>>

also love the “i was gin and you were toxic . . . wish we’d just stayed plaTONIC” like a platonic relationship would be the opposite of toxic. it’s such fun wordplay.

also “i don’t feel like anyone” makes me emo, she really just slid the most simple but heartbreaking lines in everywhere and you don’t notice them until they hit you out of nowhere one day and you’re like ...OH

AND THE WAY HER VOICE STARTS TO GO MONOTONE AT “i’ve become emotionless”

in conclusion, madison beer is a vessel for god

10/10

blue: “you could be as sweet as honey but i knew the darkness in your mind.”

this is my least favourite on the album but it’s still fantastic

the lana influence is clear without being too copycat, like it’s still SO madison. sorta like lana’s video games modernized and adapted into something truer to madison’s vibe.

love love love the whole outro

glad that this wasn’t a single like it was planned to be

7/10

interlude: “would you do that shit for me too?”

VOCODER RIGHTS

this album in general is just not really for people who don’t like vocoders and lots of technical effects. i looove that she leaned into it so hard bc it’s so HER.

this song also has so much depth for an interlude, relaying the experience of feeling SO hard about people, and realizing like you’re putting in way more than you’re getting back.

the post-chorus is like... 🤩🌌💫☄️🌠

7.5/10

homesick: “these humans speak my language, still don’t understand it.”

THIS SONG...... IS MY BABY......

oh god it just breaks my heart on every listen. the image in my head is of a little girl talking to the stars.

and why does the line about her mom and dad make me wanna cry every time? i have no idea.

I BELONG IN SPACE...... FLOATING WITH DEBRIS.......

i’m sure she’s not the first person to ever use this metaphor for mental illness, expressing the alienation of mental illness (especially one as stigmatized and misunderstood as bpd) by talking about LITERAL aliens sdkjfsdfksd, but she does it SOOOOO well and sincerely that it feels like it’s uniquely hers.

the rick & morty sample is so funny and so weird and so madison. i will probably never watch an episode of that show in my life.

10000000000/10 this song is the loml

selfish: “shouldn’t love you but i couldn’t help it, had a feeling that you never felt it.”

my absolute favourite of all of the singles, noooo question about it. it’s a perfect, perfect, perfect song.

two years, alone on new years’, nightclubs, gemini... women writing lyrics with very specific details about the shitty men that the song is about... it’s everything to me.

this song will just NEVER age. every time i listen to it, it’s like the first time all over again.

10/10

sour times: “don’t know what song of mine you heard that made you think i’d want to spend the night with you.”

home with you’s big sister<3

not the strongest lyrics, but the concept and production are more than strong enough to carry the song.

she came on this bitch mad as hell

also love that this have been another fan favourite, seemingly??

men gross

9/10

boyshit: “don’t know how to talk or communicate, we’re so on and off, to you it’s a game.”

it took me awhile to get into this when it was a single ngl, probably because it came out the same night as evermore sjdknfsfnkjsd, but once i got into it, it became the best song ever

she’s soooo reliable with her “men ain’t shit” songs ugh

8.5/10

baby: “i’m a handful but that’s what hands are for.”

when this came out as a single it was the only thing i listened to for a solid week and a half. just an excellent song. the chorus is evvverrryttthhhiiinnnnggg.

WHAT IS IT SO CATCHY FOR?

9.5/10

stained glass: “my life’s a still fading memory of what i can’t have, and everything ’round me is starting to fade into black, but black and white is so much better, i’m learning how to hide my colours.”

i’m so surprised by how much non-stans seem to love this omg, it’s never been a fav of mine, as much as i still love it

but i’m obsessed with how different and distinctly madison it is

also this is a much more genuine take on the “pls stop being mean to me just bc i’m famous / you don’t know what people are going through” type of song than most of the others i’ve ever heard. her pain is evident, and the soft “i just might break” is just..... </3

the glass breaking and little scream are so good

she loves a good metaphor and so do i!

7.5/10

emotional bruises: “how do i word this? was about to write you this letter, but it was just curses in cursive, you probably deserve it.”

this was definitely my most anticipated song along with everything happens for a reason, like i listened to the snippet on repeat CONSTANTLY lmao. and the full song definitely lived up.

the scribbling sound is so fun, i love her obsession with little real-life sound effects

10/10

everything happens for a reason: “i still can’t find a reason you’d wanna hurt me so bad.”

THIS SONG IS VERY MUCH EVERYTHING

again, this was for sure one of my most anticipated songs and just kjsadsdkajsm god i love love love it

i think she posted a video one time of the song over a clip of the mermaids from peter pan and it was so pretty and i still picture that video when i hear this song. it’s just soooooo hazy and dreamy and retro and perfect.

also the song on the album where she got to show off her vocals the most. she found her niche with this song, truly.

100/10

channel surfing/the end: “YOU’REBADFORMYHEALTHISHOULDPROLLYKEPTSOMEHELPICANTCONTROLMYSELFIMADDICTEDOTHEHELL”

oh my god i was FLOOOOOORED at the dear society clip. dear society was and is one of my FAVOURITE songs, and i appreciate her reasoning for not including it on the album (just wanting some space for a new song instead of one we’d already had for so long), but it did hurt a lil. i was so happy she found a little way to include it :’) rip to hurts like hell tho since she didn’t get the same treatment sjdnksd.

the channel surfing is also just such a fun concept for an outro.

and her laughing with her producers at the end followed by such a sweet calming tropical instrumental...... oooo it’s so nice, it feels like the calm after the storm.

10/10

overall, this album was just SO worth the wait, it’s so fantastic, it’s the loml, one of my favourite albums ever. i LOVE that it’s helped anyone with BPD feel seen and understood, and as someone who doesn’t have bpd but has a couple of loved ones who do, the emotions she expressed in these lyrics have helped me to understand this disorder more too. just such a special album.

most of the criticism i’ve seen of the album has been that it’s overproduced, and that’s definitely criticism that i understand, bc it IS heavy on the technical side and some people just don’t like very heavy production, buuuut... some people do! i do! madison does! and heavy production does not automatically make an album bad. this type of production isn’t something that i expect her to move away from, because it’s clearly her thing, and maybe that just means her place in the industry will be more with the heavy heavy pop fans and maybe even in more hyperpop circles. i also think it’s SUPPOSED to be overproduced; it’s supposed to be a mess of emotions and sometimes a little chaotic. she executed it very well.

i hope by the time her next album is out, people will stop comparing her to like every single artist out there. some reviewers seem determined to pigeonhole her and compare her to every female artist under the sun, which feels like an absolute disservice to me. she is influenced by many different people and they comes out in her music, as it does any artist’s because everybody has their inspirations, but her sound is VERY much her own. as someone who has liked her for years, i can absolutely feel her essence in each song and nobody else’s.

a 10/10 album and such an amazing, promising debut<3

#madison beer #life support #answered #lofihoneymoon

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broodsys · 4 years ago

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so. just like - updates, overview, mood, what im trying to deal with, lowkey venting

ending week 7 of school (out of 10) and im so glad that both classes are rly laid back bc i am struggling sfm with everything lately. and i mean, spanish is still challenging bc its a whole different language, but it’s a very familiar challenging and the prof, for all her faults, is a soft grader which i appreciate.

im a lot calmer about the kitten situation bc even tho (stray) momma cat had five kittens this time, good!neighbors helped last year and have been involved with me thru momma cat ever since, and im a lot more familiar with what to do. for instance, i didnt panic and temporarily steal all her babies at fair injury to myself only to research, see that they should be with their mom at this age, confirm it with the vet, then let them go right back outside lmao. instead im just leaving them with her but beginning to interact with them. and im sure the neighbors socialize them, too - after all, they’re mostly on/under their deck and who wouldn’t want to play with tiny kittens?

and yall, they’re so fucking cute im ;;;;;; one gray, one pure black, one tuxedo like its mom, and two tortoiseshells, one with a black splotch right on the middle of its face and nose ;o;

and in less fun but still good-ish news, i think i got the one concession that since alcohol has become such a big trigger of mine, if my brother is going to drink he has to be kinda subtle about it, ie no beer cans left in the sink for me to wake up to and feel like ive been punched in the gut literally first thing in the morning (:

actually bc ive been so triggered by that (it’s been going on for like 4 days as of yesterday) i had a Ton of anxious energy and, in part bc ive been needing to anyway, rearranged my room p significantly. but now im on my desktop at my actual desk instead of trying to work on, literally, a folding tv dinner tray. but my 10g aquarium was on my desk and its a pain to move - still, it was one of those rearrangement sessions where after u move one thing u see how another thing should be moved, and it all works out really well. the new location for the 10g is so close that i was able to slide it over and have it rest at one point on both surfaces

im still exhausted and still fighting so many different things, health, stress, etc. - but i have my root canal appointment on monday (finally!) and while, like, the tooth is already dead and a drainage point has developed naturally, both of which mean im not in pain, its still an ongoing infection and that’s Not Great for anyone and esp for my immunocompromised ass. so, yeah, looking forward to that. also bc it’s a complicated root canal job (my root splits midway and has two ends, and it’s one of my front teeth! even tho it’s a pain, neat) i need to see an actual endodontist, but im honestly p excited abt that bc endo is my personal favorite dental specialty and it’s so cool. i love watching them work? even when they’re working on me?

im gonna run my name & gender change forms done to the courthouse this upcoming week, and im rly excited! and nervous! i don’t think i have much cause to be, like i think it’ll go thru without a hitch, but official paperwork of any stripe makes me hella nervous

but also i have been... rly relieving my past a Lot lately. some of u may’ve seen me mention this in now deleted posts but just, yeah, i think everything that’s going on just stirred up all my old traumas and i cant rly ignore it anymore, so im thinking abt getting a therapist of some kind, more just to have someone external to the family and not, yknow, tumblr to talk to abt all this. even dug out my DBT handbook, which should say a Lot abt my state of mind bc that thing was a pain to dig out and it’s heavy and unwieldy (and great, and written by someone with BPD, and great and personally completely revolutionary and did i mention great?)

but the garden and all the growth and the birds and squirrels and bugs and everything else makes me feel so calm, so connected to smth a lot greater and vaster than my household or immediate family or the stressors (living) downstairs, which helps.

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darlinvandijk · 5 years ago

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Always been you

Concept: request where “Can you do an imagine where y/n and ruel are older and she decides she wants to go to college in LA ; they try the long distance relationship but it doesn’t work out bc she’s too busy with her studies meanwhile he becomes more popular and travels more often, but after 4 years she goes to one of his concerts and they reunite?”. Shoutout to my friend for giving me an idea to start this! Dm me and whatnot for a request!(really fucking long btw) Hope you enjoy :)

I sit by my phone frowning as I watch the FaceTime screen ring for a bit, before showing me that the call wasn’t answered. Looks like Ruel is busy, yet again. It’s not that I’m mad at him for not picking up, he has a job to do that takes up countless hours of his time, and I’m proud of the dedication he has when it comes to his career. I’m just upset that lately it seems like we never talk, he calls when I’m asleep or working, or I call when he’s asleep or working. It just seems like nothing is working for us, but I can’t not be with him, he’s my whole world. I finally clear my thoughts and stand up from my bed, making my way to my bathroom so I can have a relaxing shower, and hopefully come out to see a message from Ruel.

I make my way out of the bathroom in my favorite hoodie that I took from Ruel, jumping onto my bed to check my phone notifs, feeling my heart flutter at the text from “bubs <3”. I immediately click it, typing down a response as fast as I can, hoping he’s not busy or asleep yet. Luck is finally on my side when I get a response, mere seconds after I had sent mine.

Baby I’m so sorry, I would’ve answered but I was on stage

It’s okay bubs, how was the concert? I know how much you love Amsterdam :)

It was amazing! They were so into everything and I swear they knew lyrics to unreleased songs which was kinda wild.. wish u were here tho

I’m happy for you baby!! You know how your fans are, they find everything out lmao

Are you okay? You kinda ignored the last thing I said

I’m okay, sorry I just didn’t want to reply to it and get all emotional on you lol

I let out a shaky breath when I hit send, already feeling my built up emotions get ready to spill over, I just miss him so much. I see him typing for a couple of seconds, before the little bubble disappears, instantly replaced by my screen lighting up with an incoming FaceTime call. I hesitantly answer, making sure the hood on Ruels hoodie is covering my face a little, knowing it’s already getting splotchy from being so emotional. I watch as the screen lights up, with my beautiful boyfriend laying on his bed in the back of the bus, staring at me silently.

“Hey love, wanna remove that hood for me? I want to see that beautiful face of yours-” he quietly whispers out, not wanting to overwhelm me. He can read me like a book, which is how he can always tell when something’s wrong. I let out a quiet sigh, pulling the hood back, looking away from the phone so that I don’t have to see the look on his face. I hear him sigh out once he takes in my under eye bags, splotchy red face, and shiny eyes. He takes in a deep breath before asking the question he didn’t want to ask, “is this because of me?” He whispers out, his voice breaking with emotion. I stare at him with wide eyes, shocked by the question, and also unsure on how to reply to it.

“No! You didn’t do anything wrong, I’m just a little touchy today.” I instantly blurt out, not wanting him to feel bad, because I already know he’s thinking about all the missed calls we’ve had. More than we could count just this week. He watches me, giving me an unconvinced look, running a hand roughly through his hair. We’re both silent for a little bit, trying to figure out what was so different about this phone call compared to others, because this tension floating through the air has never happened before, I’m more unnerved than I’ve ever been with him.

“I know that’s not true. I know it’s getting to you, all the missed calls and late replies. It’s getting to me too. I just don’t know how to fix it baby, but trust me when I say I’m trying to.” He whimpers out, causing my eyes to water even more at his obvious distress. I send him a watery smile and place a kiss to my promise ring, watching as he sends me a small smile while placing a kiss to the necklace he wears for me. It’s a silver pendant with my first initial, he got it the same time he gave me this ring, which was over a year ago on our second anniversary together.

“I love you, even if things have been a little difficult lately. School has just been taking up so much of my time lately and it’s hard to find times to talk when you’re in a whole other country. It’s not your fault and it’s not mine, life just has a crazy way of handling things I guess” I mumble out, watching him nod his head, reaching a hand up to wipe his eyes of the unwanted tears. I wipe my eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie, only to look back at the screen, seeing him with a completely shattered expression. I freeze and practically stop breathing, scared of what he was about to say to me. A choked sob escapes him, tears making their way down his face as he holds onto the pendant dangling in front of his chest.

“You know I love you, right? You’re my whole world, my soulmate, my everything. I wouldn’t do anything if I didn’t think it’d benefit you.” He chokes out, his eyes blurry with tears as I stare at him with my own tears pouring down my face. I’m instantly filled with fear when I see the way he’s acting, because he’s never like this, which means whatever it about to happen is going to hurt me the same way it’s hurting him. I breathe in shakily, spinning the promise ring around my finger, giving him a small nod before getting the courage to talk.

“I know you do, I love you too. We’ve always been soulmates and always will be. You’re it for me, there will never be anyone else.” I cry out, feeling like I’m saying a goodbye rather than reassuring him. He nods his head frantically, showing me that he agrees with my statement completely. I watch him open his mouth to speak, before another cry rips out from his throat, one that sounds completely and utterly heartbroken. I immediately wince upon hearing it, feeling my heart spike as I realize what he was leading up to, as I realize the what he’s about to do for the both of us. I’m unable to open my mouth to talk, completely losing my mind as I sob and shake my head no, hoping it’s enough to stop him before he says it. It didn’t work.

“I love you. I love you so much that I’m doing this for you, I’m doing it for the both of us. I’m breaking up with you, I’m so sorry baby.” He sobs out, feeling like he lost the one thing that ever truly mattered to him. The one thing that he’d give his career up for. I sit there completely frozen, unable to comprehend the words that just came out of his mouth, before my body shakes with the sobs I let out. I feel my chest physically ache like someone tried to rip my heart out, instantly reaching my hands up to hold my chest in hopes of easing the pain. I knew that heartbreak sucked, I just never knew how much it’d actually hurt.

“Please.. please don’t do this. I love you Ruel. I need you.” I cry out, my voice sounding so unattached from me, that I barely even register the words coming out. He watches me as tears and sobs shake his body, taking in everything about me for what he knows will be the last time for awhile. I watch the way his red rimmed green eyes flit over me through the screen, drinking me in with all that he can. Not even realizing my eyes are doing the same through their teary filled gaze.

“I love you baby, I love you with all I’ve got. I’m doing this for you, you need to focus on school and working for everything you’ve ever dreamed of. I don’t want you to miss out on living your life over there just because I can’t be with you. I’m only getting in the way of that, which means I need to let you go.” He whispers out, our tears having finally been drained from our bodies, leaving us in a broken silence. I don’t reply for a second, only hearing the shaky breathing we’re both releasing, before I come to terms with the fact that he won’t change his mind about this.

“I love you too. Promise you won’t forget about me? No matter what happens, you can’t forget about me-“ I whisper out, watching the pained look on his face when my voice cracks. He gives me a shaky smile, his eyes filled with disbelief at my question. He opens his mouth to respond, but I beat him to it, not fully done with my requests. “and I’ll always be your best friend right? Like you’ll like all my insta posts still and you’ll always tell me happy birthday?” I whimper out, knowing that the requests might sound dumb, but he’ll understand what I mean. He gives me the same boyish grin I fell in love with, a few stray tears making their way down his puffy face.

“Baby I could never forget about you, you’re my whole world. You’ll be my best friend till the day I die, I’ll like all your posts as soon as you post them, since I have notifs for you, and I’ll tell you happy birthday at 12 like I do every time. I promise with everything inside of me.” He states, trying to make his voice as strong as possible, but still not being able to fully hide the tremors that shake his voice. I give him a smile, knowing how terrible I must look right now, but not caring as I gaze at the beautiful boy who will always hold my heart in his hands.

“One last thing... promise you’ll love me forever?” I choke out, feeling the way the call was on its way towards ending, wanting to hold on to any last bit of him for as long as I could. He lets out a exasperated scoff at my question, not even knowing where to start with it.

“I’ll love you till the day I die and even after that. Our love is eternal sweetheart, no matter what we’ll always make our way back to each other. I promise.” He states with so much conviction, leaving no room to even question him. I nod my head and watch him, feeling my heart break all over again as I realize it’s time to say goodbye. It’s time to say goodbye to the love of my life. To my best friend. We spend a few minutes staring at each other, not wanting to deal with the inevitable outcome of ending this call.

“This isn’t a goodbye, it’s just a see you later, okay? We’ll be together again, but not till the times right for us. I’m not giving up on you. I love you.” He breathily lets out, staring into my eyes with nothing but pure love in his eyes. I whimper as he finishes his sentence, feeling my heart officially tear into two, knowing this was it. I wipe my eyes hastily, not wanting to miss the last seconds I have with him, wanting to look at him one last time before we end this call.

“I won’t give up on you either, I’ll see you later. I love you.” I whisper out, watching the way he looks me over one final time. We send each other heartbroken smiles as I kiss my ring and he kisses his necklace, neither of us knowing when we’ll be together again. He gives me a small wave while blowing a tiny kiss to the screen before the call disconnects, leaving me completely shattered.��

———

Days seemed to pass by slower than ever, all filled with endless calls from the Van Dijk family, excluding the one person I wanted to call me the most. The breakup hurt their family almost as much as it hurt me, endless amounts of tears over FaceTime calls as the girls and Kate called me, not believing that we would ever break up. The moment they saw my puffy eyes and tear streaked face I could almost hear their hearts break, but slowly time seemed to heal my wounds. I wouldn’t say fully healed even if it’s been 2 years, but healed enough to where I can look at pictures of us without it ripping my heart out. This morning when I woke up, I saw that he had sent me a birthday message at 12, just like he always does and promised to continue doing so, leaving me a teary eyed mess from missing him.

Today I was meeting up with Coco and Sylvie for my birthday brunch, since the two flew down to Los Angeles to spend some time with me during my college holiday break. I stood in front of my mirror, putting on my final touches of makeup, and adjusting my clothes. Once I felt ready to leave, I walk out of my apartment and head down the street, to the small pastry shop the girls wanted to meet at.

As I walk in, I feel my stomach fill with excitement, ready to see the two girls who I love more than myself. Before I can even spot them, I hear Coco shriek, immediately running to pull me into a bone crushing hug. As soon as she lets me go so that I can breathe, I end up pulled into another tight hug, watching her laugh as Sylvie practically strangled me. Sylvie pulls away and drags me to the table they have, having already ordered for all of us since they know my order by heart after being so close all these years. They cheer out their happy birthdays to me once we sit down, handing me the gifts they bought me before they both look at me from across the table, with matching grins but what appears to be a slight hesitant look in their eyes.

“Spill the tea, I can tell by the looks on your faces you have something to say” I laugh out, watching as Coco roll her eyes. I give them a reassuring smile, hoping to ease their nerves on whatever they have to say, but feeling a pit form in my stomach since I know it probably has to do with the person I still haven’t moved on from. Sylvie takes in a deep breathe, reaching out to grab my hand that’s on the table, giving it a light squeeze. I’m immediately on edge at her actions, my mind instantly jumping to the worst conclusions, the first one being that he got a new girlfriend. Let’s just say I was completely wrong with my assumptions.

“Have you moved on?” Sylvie blurts out, completely throwing me off, because they would be the first two to know if I ever did. I stare at them with wide eyes, not sure on how to reply to the question, because there’s obviously a reason they’d have brought that up. I open and close my mouth a few times as I try to come up with something to say. The looks on their faces become more uneased at my lack of a response, causing me to blurt our the last thing I’d want to say.

“How can I move on when I check your brothers insta at least once every hour?-” I spill out, watching their faces instantly switch to those of amusement. I let out a groan at my embarrassing confession, covering my face as it heats up, praying that the ground will just swallow me whole. I uncover my face so that I can try and salvage what’s left of my dignity, “what I meant was that I haven’t moved on to anyone else, like the first thing I did when I woke up was check to see if he sent me a message. Why would you think I did?” I question them. I watch as both sets of eyes travel to the neckline of shirt, before they slowly trail back to my eyes, both with perplexed expressions.

“It’s just that your necklace is off, like you haven’t taken that necklace off ever, but all of a sudden it’s not on you?” Coco slowly states, immediately causing my hand to fly up to my neck, feeling my shirt rather than the promise ring, meaning that my necklace was indeed missing from my body. I let out a groan as I realize I had left it in my bathroom, having had taken it off before my shower earlier, and not putting it back on when I left. The necklace only ever leaves my body when I shower, meaning that it’s permanent residence is right against my chest, the same place the promise ring has layer ever since our breakup.

“Fuck, I never put it back on after my shower. It’s on the counter of the bathroom, I must’ve forgot it since I was so excited about seeing you guys” I mumble out, feeling like I was missing part of me without the ring, especially on a day like today. The girls give me sympathetic looks, knowing how much it means to me, especially since it’s the only thing I have that really connects me to Ruel. The girls swiftly change the conversation and talk about some of the gossip going around, before deciding we should just head back to my place.

Once we get back to my place we all sit down on my couch, their eyes wandering around and checking out some of the new things I’ve added since the last time they visited, softly smiling as they see I still have pictures of Ruel and I around. Coco grabs a frame and sends me a sad smile, her eyes looking over the photo fondly, what just so happened to be my favorite picture of us. The picture is one of my fondest memories of when Ruel and I were still together, we were all hanging out together on the beach, and Sylvie had snapped a pic when we weren’t paying attention. Our skin was glowing in the orange light from the sunset while he looked down at me with a lovestruck grin and I was laughing at something Kate had said, as I lay sprawled across his lap. I don’t think I’d ever been happier than I was at that moment.

“I miss you guys being together, but I know you’ll find your ways back to each other. You have to” Coco whispers out, with teary eyes as she thinks about the pain Ruel and I had gone through with the breakup, and the pain she knows we’re still feeling without each other. Sylvie nods her head while humming in agreement with her sister, silently praying that things work out soon, knowing her brother hasn’t been the same since everything happened between us. I give them a small shrug, my own eyes tearing up, knowing what they want won’t happen anytime soon, and I was right.

———

“You have got to be fucking with me?” I groan out, having just listened to the plans Coco just dragged me into. I hear her let out a sigh of frustration, annoyed that her plan wasn’t working out the way she had hoped, and knowing she was silently cursing me in her head. I hear Sylvie mumbling something to her in the background, before hearing Kate and Michelle make noises of agreement. I instantly tense up once she starts talking again, knowing that there was no way out of these plans she had set up.

“You promised you’d see us all tonight since it’s been a few months, you can’t break a promise. Please I promise it’ll be fun, please?” She states out, her tone becoming slightly pleading towards the end. I let out a sigh, running a hand down my face as I think about what would happen if I went. Like she has to understand why I don’t want to go, this isn’t going to just affect only me. I hear silence on the other line, knowing they’re crowded around the phone, waiting for me to answer, I take a deep breath before speaking up.

“Guys this isn’t only going to affect me. We were supposed to all see each other, you never said it would be at a concert. Let alone at fucking Ruels concert. I don’t think I can” I mutter out, feeling my heart constrict at the thought of him. It might’ve been 4 years since the breakup, but that doesn’t mean my heart doesn’t still hurt when I think of him. We’ve talked since the breakup, but it’s only ever been for birthdays, some holidays, and random messages here and there to say we hope the other is doing well. All in all, we’ve basically not legitimately interacted since the breakup, because I don’t think either of us could ever be just friends with each other. Trying to be friends would only hurt us.

“Please, I wouldn’t have you go if I knew it would hurt him. I love you both too much to do something that could harm either of you, please just trust me on this. He’d want you there.” She softly states, knowing how sensitive this topic was becoming the more I thought of him. I let out a quiet groan, before quietly agreeing to go with them. I hear them let out cheers, all of them ecstatic at the fact that they were able to get me to agree to go. Completely oblivious to the plan they had made, the plan that I set into action by agreeing to go.

“Yes! See you soon babes, love you” Coco shrieks, barely letting me reply before hanging up. I sigh as I stare at my blank screen, fiddling with my ring as it lays against my chest, before heading to my room to get ready for the events taking place in a little bit. I start doing my hair, thinking about all the possibilities tonight holds, like the thought of being face to face with him seems unreal, I can only hope he doesn’t feel uncomfortable with me being there.

I hum along to my playlist as I move on to my makeup, before freezing as a familiar tune starts playing. I listen as the beginning of painkiller fills my room, the memories from when this song was first written coming to the front of my mind. He had been nervously watching me as I lay across his bed, before hesitantly speaking up to tell me he wrote me a song, and of course I eagerly told him to sing it. I remember when he first started, I was completely enamored by him, feeling my eyes well up as I listened to the lyrics. That day was the first time we had said I love you to each other, when we both truly realized how much we meant to each other. That song means more to me than anything else in the world, it’s not just the song that’s important to me, but the day that means everything to me.

I clear my throat, dabbing at my eyes to get rid of any unwanted moisture, as I finally come back to my senses when the song finishes. I let out a sigh, continuing on with my makeup, before finally finishing up. I check my phone and see that Coco will be getting me in 20 minutes to head out, instantly causing me to rush around to find an outfit. While he probably feels nothing for me after so much time, I still want to at least look decent when we cross paths again. I get my clothes on and look at myself in the mirror, before deciding it’s good enough. I head out of my apartment and walk out, instantly spotting Coco standing outside a car waiting for me. I run over to her, instantly embracing her in a tight hug, having missed her more than anything the past couple months it’s been since I saw her last.

“Ready for tonight?” She questions with a look in her eyes that I can’t decipher, but immediately puts me on edge. I narrow my eyes as I look at her, trying to gauge her emotions, because Coco isn’t Coco without some sort of insane plan. She stares at me with doe eyes, appearing completely innocent, while she waits for me to reply to her.

“I don’t know, it’s been 4 years Co. Like that’s a long time and I don’t want to burden him you know” I whisper out, glancing out the window while feeling insecure at the thought of him possibly not wanting to even see me. Coco rolls her eyes at the back of my head, knowing that Ruel is still just as in love with me as he was when we were still together. She puts her hand on my knee and lets me think for the remainder of the car ride, while she tries to hide the smirk on her face, knowing the plan she had was going to work out perfectly on the unsuspecting pair.

We pull into the venue, getting escorted through the back entrance by security guards so that the fans couldn’t see either of us. I’m thankful the fans couldn’t see us because of the fact that they’d recognize me immediately, and start rumors on social media, even though there have been plenty of them since we broke up. Especially since he still likes all my insta posts and comments on them every now and then, fueling the fans to believe that the breakup wasn’t real. The real fans know it was though, they could sense the instant change and shift in us, no matter how hard we tried to act happy and fine on our socials for them. Little did I know, Coco was happy the fans couldn’t see me since it would fuck up her plan, because Ruel would basically be instantly notified of my presence.

We walk through hallways backstage before Coco leads me into a small room, where I’m instantly pulled into hug by Kate. She rocks us side to side, holding me as tight as she can, while the girls stand around with teary eyes watching the interaction. We finally pull away from the hug, Kate putting her hand on my face as she watches me with a look of pure motherly adoration, instantly making my eyes water with emotion.

“My other baby is finally back” Kate whispers out, the grin never leaving her face, feeling complete that all her girls and her son were finally in one place again. Kate has always called me one of her baby’s or her daughter, because she said I was destined to be her daughter in-law so why not just start early. I let out a small laugh at the way Coco and Sylvie have their phones out to record, before walking over to give Sylvie a hug. We pull away and she compliments my outfit, before pushing me into the arms of Michelle. I let out a laugh as Michelle whispers that if I ever disappear for 4 years again, she’d kill Ruel and I for doing that to everyone again. We pull away from the hug and stand around conversing with each other about anything and everything, before the door opens and someone walks in.

“Oh you little fucking shit-” He laughs out as I turn my head, just to be pulled into a bone crushing hug by Nate. I laugh as he squeezes me, before letting me go to give me a stern look, causing me to smirk at him knowing he’s about to lecture me. I watch as he takes a deep breathe, getting mentally prepared for whatever he’s about to say, “you don’t understand the hell I had to deal with the past four years, I’ve almost strangled him a good couple of times. Does he know you’re here?” He groans out at first, before ending with an intrigued look. I shake my head at his question, causing him to look at the girls in surprise, completely unaware of the mission they were on. I see Michelle give him a look, causing him to smile and give her a slight nod, leaving me perpelexed on what everyone seemed to be planning.

“Well he’s doing soundcheck right now, so I got to go check on him, because I don’t trust him. Like I don’t care if he’s 21, he’s still not trustworthy enough to be alone without me” Nate groans with an eye roll, causing us all to laugh at the mischief Ruel causes, my heart clenching since it was one of the things I fell in love with about him. Nate sends me one last smile before heading out, leaving us in the room together yet again. I watch as Coco sends Kate a look, before turning to me with a blinding grin on her face. I instantly tense up knowing she has to be up to something, there’s no other reason she’d have a smile on her face like that.

“So Kate and Michelle have to go see Ruel to just to check in on him, Sylvie wants to go find a vending machine for something to drink, and I need to find a bathroom to fix my makeup in” she explains, watching the way my eyes wander over her flawless face, seeing no reason for her to fix the makeup. Before I can question her, I’m already being pulled out of the room, and down a series of hallways. She stops outside of a light brown door, throwing it open and pushing me inside with her. I try to look around to see what room we’re in, but Coco immediately starts talking, completely distracting me from even trying to look around.

“Can you help me fix my lipstick, I feel like it’s getting on my teeth, and check the lining of it please” she practically begs, causing me to nod my head with a laugh. She hands me a q-tip from the table next to her and I instantly get to work, completely transfixed on the task at hand. I wipe around the inner lining of her lips, making sure it’s still perfect but not too far back to get on her teeth, because who wants red stained teeth. Next I move on to the outline of her lips, lightly trying to straighten certain areas, praying I won’t drag it onto her foundation. As I’m fixing her lipstick, her phone buzzes, causing her to pull away from me abruptly. I let out a surprised gasp, instantly narrowing my eyes at the look on her face, since she seemed ready to combust.

“Wait right here, I have to go grab my lip liner, I forgot to put some on, and don’t want my lipstick to just disappear over the duration of tonight. Don’t move, I’ll be right back” she all but shrieks out, jogging out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her. I stand there watching the door, perplexed on what everyone seemed to be planning for me, before deciding to take a look around the room. I walk over to the desk, looking over some of the trinkets laying there, before the door is thrown open and someone’s shouting.

“Why are you shoving me in here? Coco don’t make me bite you lil bitch, Nate stop groping me for fucks sake” I hear an overly familiar Australian voice yell, watching the scuffling take place, before he finally gets shoved in and the door slams shut. I stand there frozen, comeplety in shock by the boy in front of me, my heart feeling like it might burst out of my chest. I stay silent as he bangs on the door, before spinning around with an eye roll when he realizes the doors blocked, only to freeze upon seeing me. We stay silent, both of us just staring at each other, taking in all the changes from growing up, and taking in all the familiar things we fell in love with about each other.

“It’s been a while, yeah?” He mumbles out, playing with his fingers anxiously. I lightly scuff my shoe on the ground, too nervous to make eye contact with him right now, especially when I know my feelings for him never went away. I nod my head and continue to stare at my shoes, before looking up when he moves to stand in front of me. We make direct eye contact when I look up, his green eyes filled with an emotion I couldn’t quite decipher, but felt oddly familiar.

“It’s been four really fucking long years, which means we got some catching up to do after this concert, but uh only if you want to. I would love it if you did” he questions, giving me a anxious smile, it slowly dropping when I hesitate to answer. As soon as I see his smile drop and his eyes dim, I immediately reach out and place my hand on his arm, watching the way his eyes widen at the contact.

“Yeah, I would really like that.” I softly state, watching him give me a boyish grin, instantly causing my face to heat up as I look away. Upon noticing my head turn away, he smirks at my blush and takes the opportunity to look at my outfit, his eyes instantly locking on the neckline of my top. I turn my head back to him to ask him a question, when I notice his eyes locked on my top, before I can ask what he’s looking at, he reaches a hand out. I freeze as his hand grabs on to my chain, sliding his fingers along it until the promise ring he gave me lands in his fingers. He twirls it around, completely entranced by it, and completely oblivious to how close we’d gotten to each other. I open my mouth to come up with an excuse as to why I’m wearing it, only to be left shocked when he gives me a teary grin, reaching underneath his own shirt, pulling out the pendant. I let out a quiet sob when I see the little silver pendant, only to be pulled straight into the arms of the boy I’ve loved my whole life. He holds me and rocks us back and forth, one hand pressed to the back of my head, the other wrapped around my shoulders.

“I kept all my promises. Told you I wasn’t going to give up on you.” He whispers in my ear as I hold him as tight as I can, never wanting to let him go. He pulls away from me and cups my cheek with his hand, before leaning down and pressing a light kiss to my forehead. He rests his forehead against mine for a few seconds, just taking in the moment while it lasts, before we’re both startled by the door flinging open. He immediately pushes me behind him, but the two had already seen all they needed to see.

“I KNEW IT WOULD WORK” Coco screeches, causing Nate to flinch as he stands with her, having came to collect Ruel since it was time to go on stage. Ruel rolls his eyes, but still has a lovesick smile on his face, before instinctively grabbing my hand and pulling me with him out the door. We walk hand in hand to where the stage is, hearing the thousands of fans out there screaming and chanting for him to come out, before coming to a stop next to the stairs for the stage. He looks at our hands before blushing and dropping them, leaving me there with a confused and slightly hurt expression. Upon seeing my face he instantly panics and starts rushing to explain himself.

“It’s not that I don’t want to hold your hand, I just don’t want to rush straight into things after a four year break. Trust me, it’s taking everything inside of me to not just jump back into how we used to be” he groans out, I laugh and grab his hand, really noticing how his hand still fits in mine perfectly. I get a little lost in thought, but come back when Ruel gives my hand a squeeze, just like what he would do back in the day.

“I get it, I want to rebuild everything too... I really missed you, like I never moved on from you.” I whisper out, before Ruel pulls me in, holding me tight against him. He places a light kiss on top of my head, before holding me for a little longer. Nate comes over and tells him he has about a minute until he needs to go up, causing him to groan, not wanting to leave me when he just got me back. I laugh and pull myself out of his arms, tilting my head up to look straight into his eyes.

“I never moved on from you either, I couldn’t. I told you we’d find the way when the time was right” he smirks out, causing me to roll my eyes, trust him to make a sweet situation cocky. He laughs at my attitude, before giving me one last squeeze, and holding his hand out. I look at it before sending him a giant smile, already knowing what he wanted to do. Neither of us noticed, but Michelle and everyone came to stand and watch, as Ruel and I did our pre-concert ritual. It was a handshake we had made as children, but kept adding on to the older we got. We finish it off, with the usual pinky promise, both of us kissing the opposite end, before he quickly kisses my cheek and bounds up the stairs. I stand there in shock, holding my blushing cheek, before turning my head to the girls who all hold knowing smirks.

“Looks like he added another thing to the ritual” Coco laughs out, causing me to roll my eyes, turning to watch Ruel from the side stage. He welcomes the crowd and starts to sing, the fans instantly singing every word, and watching him like he put the stars in the sky. After the first song, he turns to the band and asks them to pause really fast, making all of us confused, since this was not a planned break.

“I’m sorry if I’m a little jumpy today, or if I’m just a complete mess. I just got to reunite with the girl I’ve been in love with since I was a kid after four years apart, so yeah I am a mess-” he starts off, looking over to me with a large smile. I instantly blush and grin back at him, overwhelmed that he still feels the same way about me after all this time. The crowd starts screaming my name and chanting out the ship name they created for us way before we even got together, causing everyone to start laughing. Ruel glances over at me again as he starts talking, “I told you it wasn’t a goodbye, it was just a see you later. Even the fans knew I was never going to get over you, I honestly didn’t even want anyone else. It’s always been you.” He mumbles out. The fans instantly screaming as loud as they can, while I stand there in awe, tears streaming down my face. He jogs over and gives me a hug, before promising to spend all his time on catching up with me after the concert, leaving me there to sing my heart out to the songs that were written by the boy I love.

That night, I rekindled a love that was never lost, but rather put on hold. I know we said we’d take it a little slow, but that night I slept in the arms of the love of my life, feeling like I was whole again for the first time in years. I felt the overwhelming love I have for him completely fill me to the brim, because he’s not only my best friend, but he’s my soulmate. It’s always been him.

#ruelvincentvandijk #ruel van dijk #one ruel #ruel #ruel imagines #ruel imagine #ruel one shot #imagines #imagine #one shot #x reader #free time ep #ruel fanfic

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years ago

Text

Survey #305

“you want me to be yours, well then you’ve got to be mine, & if you want a good girl, then goodbye”

Do you call the ice cream topping "jimmies" or "sprinkles"? They're "sprinkles" down here. What music are you listening to? Ha, I just turned on music before starting this. "Sex Metal Barbie" by In This Moment is on rn. If you go to school (HS or college) does your school have a rival? N/A Have you been baptized in any religious tradition? Yeah; I was born in a Roman Catholic family. My mom's mom would've probably had a heart attack if us kids weren't. At family gatherings, are you more likely to hang out with the younger or older relatives? I mean, I'd go for those my age or older, generally. I'd hang out with kids though if they wanted me to. Considering you current health, how long do you think you will live? With my CURRENT health, probably not even 80. Do you have anything in your room that would be 'weird' to others? Posters, yeah. Have you ever done geocaching? No, but it'd be cool if my body could actually handle taking a single goddamn step. What was the last game you won? Maybe Uno with my niece? I generally let her win, but occasionally I'm "lucky" to TRY to be more convincing, lol. I think she knows I let her, though. Do you know any deaf people? If so, is it easy or difficult to have conversations with them? No. Do you enjoy playing Monopoly? Why or why not? No, because I don't like board games, especially any that involve math. Is there a doorknocker on your front door? No. Do 'laugh tracks' on TV shows annoy you? They're so normal that I don't even notice them, really. Do people often mistake you for other ethnicities? If so, what do you usually get? No, I'm pretty obviously white. Has anyone famous ever attended your school? Who? I won't say his name for the sake of not connecting dots, but a well-known football player attended my high school. Have you ever had to attend an event that occurred on your birthday? Ha, my 16th birthday landed on the Super Bowl... I was at Jason's that night, and just to be "part of the family," we watched it with everyone else that came over. I was so bored and uninterested, but that's my own fault, really. I could have said something, but this was only a month into our relationship so I was too uncomfortable to speak up. What do you think makes a girl a slut? Do you believe that label is thrown around far more often than it should be? And finally, do you think it's unfair that mostly only women receive that label? I don't give a flying fuck how many people a girl is sexually involved with so long as she is safe and open and honest with her partners. I'm not a fan of the word and don't think anyone should be called it. Do you think it's bad to have sex at 15 or younger? I don't think it's smart, really. It's just too young to risk pregnancy. Yes, abortion is an option, but like... a 15 y/o girl should never be faced with that dilemma. I'ma be real tho, I don't think it's a "good" idea until you're at least 18, aaaand I don't know any non-virgin who waited that long. Just try your best to wait, ig. Favorite love song at the moment? Love songs never sit well with me anymore. I mean I can enjoy them, absolutely, I just... have a lot of bitterness. Trying to pick a favorite when you feel like that is like trying to pick the best-looking rotten apple of the bunch. Ever wondered what it would be like dating the same gender as you? I've done that already, and it was great but also scary in a massively homophobic state. Ever paid for sex? No. During thunderstorms, how does your pet react? Neither have a unique reaction; they're unfazed. What internet browser do you use? Google Chrome. Do you like eggnog? Noooo no no. How often do you see your mother? Every day, because I live with her. Do you like croutons in your salad? No, I really don't like the texture difference. Who did you last play truth or dare with? I don't know. Have you ever brewed your own mead, wine, beer or soda? No. Have you had to make any changes in your life lately? If so, what kind of changes? ugh What's the earliest popular thing you can remember from your childhood? Ummm. I mean, probably like Barney or Elmo? Do you prefer practicality or fashionability when it comes to clothes? Well, really neither. I'm the type that wears tank tops in snow, flipflops year-round, sweatpants in summer... so I don't really dress with practicality. I don't care what's "fashionable," so. Comfort pretty much reigns over my wardrobe. Which kinds of berries grow in the wild where you live? There are these little red ones that grow in little groups and somewhat resemble raspberries. I can't remember if they're edible, though... Oh, and muscadine grapes (I had to look up if they were berries lmao) can be found here, too. They're yummy. Beautyberries are another. Have you ever made an article of clothing yourself? If so, what was it? No. Do you go to arcades? If so, what's your go-to game at one? Even before Covid, I never really went to them. I enjoy them, though. I guess my favorite is maybe air hockey? When's the last time you had an alcoholic beverage? What was it? At the Cheesecake Factory for my birthday. It was some kind of sangria... Maybe strawberry and peach? Idr, but it was good. What has been the most enjoyable job you've had? You assume I've had a job I actually enjoyed. How about the least enjoyable job? Well, I barely lasted two hours in a dairy, soooo... When's the last time you had to carefully plan how you used your time? You're asking the wroooong person, 'cuz my life is never busy enough for that. Who do you usually say hello or good morning to first? My snake Venus, usually. Well, that is if her head is peeking out of her hide or is just fully out. Do you ever chat about your favorite video games with your friends? I don't really have gamer friends anymore, so not really. What do you hope you grow out of? Being so goddamn dependent. What movie made you cry the most? I can't say for sure considering it's easy for movies to make me cry, lmao. Maybe Titanic. What was one of the happiest moments of your childhood? Seeing a container of dog food in the far back behind the Christmas tree one year. It's how I learned I was finally gettinga dog (Teddy). What brings you the most joy in life? Probably my cat lmao. What's a hobby you would like to try out? I wanna get back into video editing, I just. Don't have the motivation for it anymore. As with most things. What sort of a kiss do you count as the first kiss? On the lips and with mutual intention. What was the last event you attended? Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's, ig. How about the last event you organized? Me? Organizing an event? What's the biggest insect you've ever seen? In the wild, probably like... a rhinocerous beetle or something. NO NO WAIT. I remember at least once in my life seeing a fucking GINORMOUS moth on the ground one morning. I don't know what kind it was, but jc it was huge. How about the biggest spider? Oh yikes, I'll never forget this: an orb weaver wandering across the floor of our childhood van and under the passenger's seat. Never saw it again. I was afraid to let my feet stay on the floor for a looong time, haha. What's something you'd never ever dare to ask another person? I'd never ask certain "why" questions, like "why did you get an abortion?" or something like that. I can think of valid situations to ask most things, even controversial matters, but no one should ever have to justify something like that. "Why don't you have kids?" is another. That one gets to me. Having children is not an advancement or milestone in everyone's life, and hell, you never know if the woman's had like five miscarriages or something. What's something you've always wanted to ask someone but haven't dared? Why Mom didn't raise her eldest daughter, at least for her whole life. Katie's childhood is a big mystery to me, and I want to know more, but I know the topic is very upsetting to Mom, so I'm not about to make her explain it. What's the worst/best thing you've done without your parents knowing? Saying "worst/best" makes this question confusing... but I'm guessing you mean the best thing to me that they wouldn't have approved of? I really didn't do a lot of things that would fit that description. I can only think of a certain intimate occasion where things happened where they probably shouldn't have. If you wear earrings, what does your favorite pair look like? Ugh, I don't because of the holes being too stretched out from wearing heavy earrings too long. I still haven't gotten to putting proper gauges in so it looks less stupid. Have you ever won any money from a scratch card? Maybe like, $10 or something. How about a slot machine? I've never played one. Do like playing bingo? Sure, it's all right. What small, everyday thing makes you really happy? Cuddling with my cat. Do you enjoy puzzle games? If so, which one's your favorite? Yeah, I do. I can't really pick a favorite, though... Is there a substance you avoid at all costs? If so, what is it and why? I think in a past survey I mentioned my aversion to beer because of the association it has with my dad. I'd never be able to get a sip down. Not that I really want to anyway though, it stinks. What you would you absolutely hate living next door to? Any really busy location or travel hubs, like a train station. My childhood home was near a railroad track, and it sucked, so I can only imagine a station. What would you love to live next door to? A waterfall, uggghhhh. In the woods too to hear plenty of frogs and toads and crickets... What gives you nostalgia? It is very easy to make me nostalgic. The littlest things can do it. Hearing about/seeing/playing childhood video games, like Spyro, is a biggie. Which reminds me how damn badly I wanna play the Reignited trilogy, fuck. I just don't have the proper console. Which language do you think is the most complicated to learn? Well English is supposedly the hardest objectively, but as a native English speaker, I can't say anything about that. In my experience, Latin was like fucking impossible. Is there a place that you might call your second home? I guess Dad's house, but it's not like I'm there a lot. I feel comfortable there, though. How do you imagine your later life to look like? I DO NOT want to think about this. I fucking dread the thought. What is a job you would never in a million years want to do? A butcher. There is absolutely no motherfucking way I ever could do it, even if it kept me off the streets. What's the weirdest building in your city? *shrug* How do you keep in touch with friends usually? Facebook. Do you recognize friends'/family's vehicles by sound? Not anymore. Dad had an old car that was very easy to recognize with its shitty muffler, but he hasn't had that car in years upon years. I used to be able to recognize Jason's old car too because of sound, but primarily because he drove way too fast down our path that when I heard a car zooming over rocks, I knew it was him. What's something new you've just recently learned? It was actually a topic of recent discussion that I may have high-functioning Asperger's. Very, very unusual to learn later in life, but apparently Mom's seen the warning signs in some things since childhood, like my extreme pickiness with textures, my tendency to knead and play with my hands in situations of discomfort, my social ineptitude, hyperfixations, it actually running in our family (which I didn't know beforehand), among a lot of other things. We're not really digging into it though because it just doesn't matter; there's obviously no magic treatment for autism, and me being in therapy and having a psychiatrist to handle my meds is enough. If you were in Harry Potter, which house would you be in? Apparently I'm on the Hufflepuff/Gryffindor line when I took a survey a long time ago. Are you nagged about being on the computer too much? Not anymore, at least on the average day. Mom's accepted it by now. Dad's joked about it before though and I know others have certain opinions about it. Based on your personality, what animal do you think you'd be? Maybe a deer. Shy, reclusive, and always on alert. Have you ever been in a hot tub? Yeah. What song is stuck in your head at the moment? I have "my boy" by Billie Eilish on right now because it's stuck in my head. What's your father's middle name? John. What's the last movie you saw in theaters? Yikes, good question. I think it was The Lion King remake. Have you ever vandalized? No. What's a pet you've always wanted? Most pets I want I've had at some point or another... I guess I'll say a ferret, though I've really only wanted one in concept. I could never keep up with their maintenance, but by god they are the cutest fucking things ever. Do you like mice? I love mice! What's your favorite t-shirt? My "equal in our bones" Cloak shirt. :''') The design is so beautiful and just my style in general, plus I live to support anything Fischfuck takes part in. Did you/will you get a car for your 16th birthday? I'm 25 and still have never had my own car lmaoooo. What's your favorite tomato variety? I generally don't like tomatoes themselves, but rather products made with them, like ketchup. If I'm in the mood though, I do like tomato sandwiches with mayo and bacon; I only ever enjoyed them though if they were fresh right from an old friend's garden. Which well-known person's death shocked you the most, if any? I think Chester Bennington's was the biggest surprise. Rest easy, you legend. What's the craziest color you'd dye your hair? More like what crazy color WOULDN'T I dye it... What was the longest train ride you've been on? I've never been on one. What's the coolest hobby one of your friends has? uhhhhh idk Have you ever played in a stack of hay bales? No. If you could learn any skill, which would you like to learn? Ha, cooking. How do you like your steak? Medium well.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''my boy'' by billie eilish

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dxmagedrose · 5 years ago

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GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER!

Tagged by: my lover @hammurabicomplex I’m tagging: anyone and everyone who wants to pick this one up! share with the class if you feel like it! tag me in it!!

PRESENTING. RANDOM DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO-MUN AT 2AM ;

FIRST NAME Good fucking question… It’s (sort-of) currently Dylann! I was Kieran before that, though; it’s still used as one of my first names and I’m not used to Dylann quite yet bc I’ve just started using it.

Indigo is one of my middle names though, and I’ve used it as an online handle elsewhere forever so I use it here now! [ Fun etymology facts: Dylan(n) is a mythology name generally meaning “born of the wave” (aspiring diver & a water witch at heart). Kieran means “little dark one” bc of my love for horror, && I chose Indigo bc as a kid to be it was neither boy (blue) or purple (girl) and was both and neither as well as my absolute favorite color as this vibrant ass mystical color. ]

STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF hmmmmm…. I’m a horror lover at heart, so as a child (I wanna say 12), I was walking through an antique store (I have a few cool finds, I considered putting my other one as the fact tbh) and I turned the corner and I saw these two dolls staring back at me at the foot of the stairs of this antique building. my blood froze, and i felt my stomach drop. i got actual, physical goosebumps stumbling across these two creepy dolls staring back at me in the corner, and i couldn’t leave the store without them. perhaps the little painted porcelain boy would be somewhat spooky by himself if it wasn’t for the terrifying lidded gaze of the porcelain girl with the hairline fractures and slightly open lips. i cant look at her. i dont really find dolls scary, I like to find the spookier ones ones, and she makes me paranoid as hell. i keep her face covered and her up in my closet except for when i bring her out to show her off proudly as the spookiest thing I have but……. i dont really collect dolls anymore. even thinking about her brings a fearful tear to my eye. i don’t like to think about her for very long, but that’s why I’m so fucking proud to own her. ( YES — I’m THAT white person in the horror film )

TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON hhhhh a beardy jawline, high cheekbones, crooked canine teeth >:3c

A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF b.l.t.’s with avocado. ahhhh. my mouth is watering just thinking about it, oh my god. just a bit of salt and pepper???

A FOOD YOU HATE barbecue anything, i hate the taste of bbq sauce, you keep your nasty black goo to yourselves at the grill. twice in my life i have presented with barbecue pizza and both times i cried literal tears. why would you do such a horrible thing to a person? what kind of a monster are you? how do you sleep at night?!

GUILTY PLEASURE the sims. constantly. always. i’ve sunk thousands of hours into my households. oh also uhhhhhh i run two 80s horror blogs, one being a shitpost blog with occasional art of mine and one gremlin fanfic ship blog for horrible, terrible self indulgent fanfics i’ll get the courage to finish writing & post so i can be cancelled on tumblr for at some point. NO, i won’t link them. as i pretend they’re even all that hard to find, within a day i was found on both by someone i admire here a lot :’) ilu bby thnk u eternally for supporting ur local horrifying dumbass wtf

WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN the same clothes i’ve been wearing all day usually, my sweats & long sleeve raglans or my hoodies. i like being cozy day & and out. and ugh. efoort. just throw me in a blanket in a cool room and im out.

SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS serious relationships with some openness or poly. i wish i could fling! just not exactly easy for demisexual autistics lmao.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE I think I would be adopted by my grandma as a kid. It would save me some trauma but mostly I think it would get my autism diagnosed way earlier and save me angsting all these years of wondering why & thinking it’s my fault I’m struggling so much and so loud and affectionate and different in a world that i didnt fit in the same way.

ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON when i get drunk i text people how much they mean to me in my life. does that answer your question? ahhh. i’m sometimes a cuddle monster with friends, i message people with long texts about how much they mean to me, but I sometimes really don’t like to be touched at all.

A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN FLYPAPER. F L Y P A P E R. FLYPAPER. FLY, and, I can’t stress this enough, fucking PAPER. ( Though also Whole Nine Yards and both Re-Animator & Bride ). I have watched Flypaper already like, 5 times this week and I’m still not done, and the other movies have been on repeat for days in this household within the last year. In the past it has also been Donnie Darko & the new Nightmare on Elm Street. roast me.

FAVORITE BOOK White Fang by Jack London. Have I actually ever finished it? No. Do I still own a copy I’ve had since childhood thru multiple dogs eating it, taking it to and from school, and highlighting and circling all the best parts of chapter one ever since I was a kid and it was too hard of a book for me to read? You bet your ass. If I ever need inspiration I just reread chapter 1. Although one of my other favorites was Broken Monsters by Lauren Beukes. But White Fang is like, a weirdly personal text. We stan London’s writing in this household.

YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE FENNEC FOX!! I used to daydream about having my own named Shiloh when I was a lil kid. they’re adorable little things and i am obsessed. i mean, gimme any fox and im happy, marble foxes, red foxes… but I was obsessed with fennec foxes. Also tbh ferrets. I want a ferret.

TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS [IF YOU ARE AN RP BLOG, YOU CAN USE YOUR OWN SHIPS AS WELL] Rosa & @ninetyscnds‘s Luke, Rosa & @iimpulsivity is already screaming my name, Rosa & Constantine, Jesse & Andrea from Breaking Bad, and the joker and harley of 80s sci-fi Dan & Herbert from Re-Ani. I am but a simple opossum.

PIE OR CAKE Pie! I’ll take both pumpkin & melty apple over cake. also, cheesecake is more pie than cake soooo, pie wins.

FAVORITE SCENT my dogs / my blanket. :’) It’s the most grounding smell in the world.

CELEBRITY CRUSH oliver jackson-cohen, i’m fucking GAY and im angry about it. there i was, minding my own business, and i saw that asshole in a certain SHIRTLESS GIF and it AWOKE SOMETHING IN ME. dont talk to me about it, holy shit im obsessed with beardy men now god fuckkdafjaask i hate him why did he make me this gay i was perfectly fine being into girls but NOOOOOO him and his dumb hairy chest and sweet rugged face and I—— I also am obsessed with the archaeologist & television personality Josh Gates and may or may not be considering making a fan blog for him bc idk if my anthropology docuseries host is Dad or Daddy but i love him lots

IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO I would go on a dive with anthropologists and archaeologists doing fieldwork research in the ancient cenotes of the Yucatán Peninsula. My actual dream job, catch me crying & fantasizing about being underwater documenting Mayan skulls given as offerings. Fuckkkk, I love anthropology so much!! take me anywhere in the world to immerse myself into culture & archaeology.

INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT Introvert. I have a real life friend I see roughly once a month, and that’s it. Plenty of online relationships, I’m chatty, message me all day every day. but i dont do people well.

DO YOU SCARE EASILY I used to! Really bad. I don’t as much anymore. I do get paranoia a lot still. Having therapists telling you that the FBI could be outside your house watching you through your windows will kind of nervous. ( no google results for: yes hello fbi i am a writer please dont put me on watchlists i just have research i need to do for this idea im working on, would you like to try again? ) I have nightmares nightly but not they never make me afraid, they just make me feel like crap. jumpscares and loud noises and seeing people reaching into their pockets dont set off as many brain alarms anymore tho!! progress haha.

IPHONE OR ANDROID I like my android better bc of capabilities but meh

DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES My mom, her husband & I play COD for family game night, and Silent Hill is my life’s blood. I’ve sunken hours into Sims & Skyrim, and Norman Jayden from Heavy Rain is my #1 fictional character in existence, why do i love the druggie babies

DREAM JOB Oh… You’re asking me to pick? I’d love to be an anthropologist doing work out in the field. Underwater archaeology is peak, but I’m also heavily considering being a body recovery diver or police diver. I’d love to see myself in uniform someday, if possible. Just the thought makes me teary eyed & proud.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS fund my person creative & educational endeavors. get myself a spooky ass abandoned house to make my own home to create in, and travel to the world’s best dive sites. just live a mild life of education, creation & exploration. that’s the dream TM.

FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE dr. hill is a gross and whiny lil bitch this post brought to u by the miskatonic crew, how is everyone here an even worse bad guy than herbert west precious dan excluded talk shit get hit tho john winchester from spn and both walter white & todd from breaking bad are all in my crew of hated characters. i jusT… the reani novel is difficult to read because i have to deal with this old sack of shit.

FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER Supernatural :-)

… AND THIS CONCLUDES A DEEP DIVE WITH INDIGO!! //

#||: && the mundane ( ooc );#( get to know a bitch!! )#( this was... a lot of me rambling about weirdly personal shit at 2 am )

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princess-cordelias-writingblog · 5 years ago

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When You’re Ready (Scott xReader)

A/N: This is an old request from a time when I was doing these prompts, but those aren’t open anymore so please don’t ask! -Danny

Words: 1,639

Warnings: angsty?? it has a happy ending tho, almost all my writing has a happy ending lmao

Prompt: #123 “Let him/her go! It’s me who you want!”

“I fucked up”

I walked around Lydia’s room, shaking, Lydia was on the bed, looking at me with furrowed eyebrows “What do you mean?”

“I am so dead, Lydia,” I whined, “I can’t believe I was so stupid.”

“Y/N, What did you do?” Lydia asked again, slowly.

“I-I thought I could control myself, I was doing fine...”

“If you keep walking around my room like that I’ll throw you something, I swear-”

I stopped in my tracks “I think I almost killed someone.”

“You what?” Lydia stood up from her seat and closed the door with a confused look on her face.

“It was his fault anyway!” I defended, supporting my weight on the wall and sinking to the floor “He was getting to close to me and I told him to stop, didn’t listen so I just pushed him... down the stairs.”

“You what?” My friend repeated, this time looking startled.

“I was at a party,” I explained, “because I needed to relax, and this guy came to me pretending he wasn’t trying to get in my pants and offered me a drink which I stupidly accepted...”

“Oh my god,” Lydia kneeled in front of me, grabbing my face with both hands “Y/N did that asshole hurt you?”

“He didn’t get the chance,” I grumbled “When he was walking me upstairs I tried to push him away and he grabbed my waist really tight and I got angry so I kinda just... I pushed him harder.”

The memories of the night before came flooding through my mind and I had to close my eyes for a moment, remembering my fight with Scott, before all of this happened.

“You’re not ready, Y/N”

“I am,” I scoffed, picking up my school work from Scott’s bedroom floor, ready to head home. “Haven’t you trained me enough? I’m ready to go out and be a normal teenager now”

“You’re a werewolf” He replied in exasperation, “a werewolf, Y/N! and it’s only been a month you’re not ready to be on your own around town, things could go wrong, trust me I’ve-”

“You’ve only been a werewolf for like, what, a year? Suddenly that makes you a wise alpha that is allowed to boss me around?” I packed everything in my bag and left the room without looking at him, “look, I know I’m the new girl and technically I wasn’t supposed to be there that night but I was cause we’re dating and I thought you were in trouble I just didn’t know it was a supernatural problem and let alone knew a werewolf could actually bite me and turn me into one, but that doesn’t mean I’m reckless all the time, I can handle myself”

“Is not about trust” Scott followed me downstairs and to the door, stepping in between me and the way out so I couldn’t leave, “I worry that someone gets hurt, either if you come across another supernatural being or a human that pushed the wrong button in your system. I don’t want you to be in danger, Y/N”

“You want me to be fine?” I inquired, my hand tightly closed around the door handle, “then leave me alone.”

Scott let me go after that and I didn’t try to fix things with him before I left. I was pissed and I felt trapped and stressed, he was only trying to help me cause he loves me but I wasn’t having it, to be quite honest, I just wanted my old life back and knowing I wouldn’t get that really made me angry.

I stayed at Lydia’s for the night, too worried about going back to my house and keep on thinking about the whole mess alone, I hadn’t called Scott yet, nor anyone from the pack besides Lydia. Later the next day I found out that the guy didn’t get hurt and would be just fine, my chest lost the heaviness that had me drowning and for a moment I thought maybe I was overreacting, maybe I could handle myself for real.

I wanted to feel like my life was going back on track so I went for a run through the woods; granted, it wasn’t the best idea but if I wanted to heighten my senses I needed to look for a place that could give me space and the woods were it. The minute I stopped for a break I heard the clicking sound of a gun right behind me.

“Don’t move, freak”

I recognized the voice and turned around slowly, cursing in a whisper when I came face to face with the same guy from the party... so he was a hunter. Great.

“If I were you,” I said in the calmest voice I could do, “I would put that gun down before you get hurt”

“Really?” He chuckled, “cause it seems here that I’m not the one in disadvantage, darling”

“Well, I remember that wasn’t the case the other night”

“If I had known you were this kind of crap, things would’ve gone differently, sweetheart,” despite the nickname, his tone was far from kind, “and what happened that night is only proof of it. You’re kind are nothing but monsters, I’m glad I can get rid of you one by one and as painful and slow as I can”

Before I could reply, another voice came out of the trees.

“Let her go! It’s me who you want!”

Never thought I’d feel as happy as now seeing Scott’s face appearing in front of us, his eyes shone bright red, clearly trying to intimidate the boy pointing his gun at me.

“An alpha,” His eyes were bright with a sick excitement, “finally, something interesting for once”

“No!” I exclaimed, only getting angrier “you’re not doing anything to him”

“Is not your choice to make, love” He changed targets and was about to shoot him when I jumped ahead and grabbed the tip of his gun, quickly moving it away from Scott’s body. The bullet found its way to a tree and Scott and I both so the chance and took it.

I punched the guy hard on the face and while he fell unconscious, Scott took the gun from the ground and threw it far from reach. Making sure he was in fact, not faking his awful state, Scott and I looked at each other, I felt the blush of embarrassment on my cheeks, ready for the scolding when suddenly he hugged me tight, sighing in relief.

“I’m so sorry for treating you like that” He mumbled against my hair.

“No, you’re right,” My voice sounded slightly strangled from the way he was holding me, “look at what happened, I was being so selfish thinking I was allowed to do whatever I wanted, I didn’t think of the pack-”

“Is not your job to worry about the pack, that’s my work” He insisted, moving away from me, he stared deeply into my eyes, “I can’t stop feeling guilty about your condition... being a werewolf is complicated, Y/N. I was scared you would be angry at me for doing this to you”

“This wasn’t your fault, it was mine” I grabbed his face with my hands and comforted him, “this is all wrong, Scott. Can we have a talk tonight? To clear things up”

“Sure...”

“We need to take him to his car first though” I looked down to the boy laying on the dry leaves, a bruise already forming on his face, “he may be an asshole but I don’t want to kill him”

“Right,” Scott frowned while giving a small nod, “I saw his car on the road while I was heading here, c’mon”

“Hey, you never told me how’d you find me” I mentioned once we were in front of my house.

“Lydia told me what had happened and I knew you’d go for a run, you always do it when you’re feeling stressed and I wanted to help you calm down,” He shrugged, walking me to the door, “I was worried”

“I’m sorry” I repeated for what it felt like the hundredth time.

“Don’t be” He stretched his arms and I happily reach forward, hugging him by the waist, “you proved your point, you’re ready to keep going with your life, just don’t go too far maybe? not because I don’t think you can take care of yourself, but because I love you and I’d like to have you around-”

Scott kept rambling and I couldn’t help but laugh, he gave me a confused look with those pretty brown eyes and I kissed him softly, my attempt to calm him down.

“I will, Scott” I nodded, “gladly.”

“Cool,” He smiled, then he kissed me again.

Tell me what you think :)

#scott x reader #teen wolf imagine #Danny's writing #writing prompt #scott mccall imagine

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hiraethstill · 5 years ago

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THIS WEEK AND LAST WEEK ON DAIYA NO ACE (7/16 and 7/23)

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!

7/16 LIVEBLOG:

IMMEDIATE assault by eijun's handsome face

and his DETERMINATION

every time the OP comes on im like where are the babies? THERE THEY ARE @ firsties

the way i GASPED

THIS IS HOW WE FELL IN LOVE WITH EIJUN I TELL YOU

haha poor audience member doesnt know sawamura is mostly good at swinging from the bunt stance

eijun... you have every right to be frustrated

ugh... the way he looks when he was a doormat to the ace... i feel this too much my chest hurts

"if i had pitched like furuya did today i wouldve been subbed out" TOO TRUE AND OUCH

HE HITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

THE BOIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII

THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGENDDD

AND JUST LOOK AT ASADA AND KUKI'S F A C E S

DOUBLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

lmao did eijun learn to run bases from mochi? now i want this

uhhh the announcer was wrong? the STANDS were all cheering and happy, it was mostly the dugout that was surprised

bc this is level of trust he gets from first string sigh

sorry all my frustration is here

HAHA OKAY BUT why does this look gayalso sawamura's little "na!" with the pew pew is so cute wtf

his lil cheeky face in the corner im hashjdlkdgj

haruichi and toujou in that shot look like they'd been helping him practice batting and it paid off

hslkhg eijun and his "hips!" i cant

KANEMARUUUUUUUUU

HELL YEAH TAKUMI NICE SHOULDER

nice eijun is safe

haha i never know who to root for bc i love all the bois

okay but

has anyone ever talked about how cool amahisa's eyes are???

i mean

look at this

so cool

yoooo wtf amahisa's voice in this part is really appealing??? damnn

so... kanemaru's a capable batter even if he's not top tier, why you gotta keep making him bunt

oh well, i like that face you're making kanemaru

noooooooooooo

it's okay kanemaru you did your best

cmon mochi bring him home!!!!!!!!!!

EIJUN ENOUGH WITH THE HIPS LMAO

yeah thats right mochi + other batters, give him the run support he deserves

AMAHISA THE DISASTER BI IM

"did he shave his eyebrows? he looks like a strong fighter" are you just checking him out

you'd want him to do those jump kicks amahisa

moon-face?????

omg i feel the tinglings... of a rarepair... amakura.....................

what was i saying about his EYES??

come the fuck ON dont leave eijun stranded on second!!!!!!

HHHHH

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

MY BOISSSSSSSSSSS

SHOW ME YOUR FACEEE

(and u rite yall amahisa is yabai)

THERE BE YOUR FACEEEE

IM SO EMOTIONAL

AND HIS VOICE

FUCKLE

AND HIMSTDVEEE

whoaaa that slowmo pitching sequence!

HARUCCHIII

oh hello eijun upping the tempo and looking great doing it

wow this super HD sparkle miyuki

EIJUN IS BEAUTIFULLLL and lowkey this looks like the OP

ASADA AND KUKI MY SONS I WOULD DIE FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

BEING SO EXCITED ABOUT THE CUTTER KAI AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

I ALSO LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

HLKDHFS AURA

okay sun we gettin a lil cap happy

another pretty eijun shottttt

WHOA 3D BALL

3D SLOWMO BALL

N* H* TT * R

i feel like i jinxed him sorry eijun

also i LOVE when the stands yell OSH OSH OSH back

wow toujou's voice was. so cute??

noriiiii i love you so much and thank you

furuya silently reflecting huh?

YO WTF IN THE MANGA NORI'S CAP COVERS FURUYA'S NUMBER WTF ANIMATORS ITS ICONIC

awww theyre all patting him i wanna pat eijun too

NORIIIIII YOU ARE SO PRECIOUS

kanemaru's eyes are gray??

kousei-san.......... mayhaps i have.......... Feelings about this

"gureato" man tahara is great

HLJSKDFHKGSFJGKFHDGLDF BLONDE AMAHISA

THIS IS JUST FUELING MY AMAKURA LMAOOO

WHY IS BLONDE HAIR IN MIDDLE SCHOOL A RUNNING JOKE IN ANIME

kuramochi, amahisa, hyuuga from knb, alla dem yankees

oh my god is that suddenly shaved head amahisa still in first year he's so smol

wow kousei is so eccentric haha i love it

YESSS BRINGING BACK MANAKA-BOY

omg yakushi cameo!!

wow this is so pleasant to look at and idk why??

his eyeeesss

and this too omgg

I SEE NISHINO

omgggg are they who i think they are

YES THEY AREANIMATORS REALLY BE FEEDING ME TODAY

sorry mimei that was too much tension in a single glance not to be homoerotic

go shirasu-senpai!

wellll shit, rip zono and rip seidou

142 pitches???????? are they throwing out amahisa's arm imma fight

YO OKAY BUT DOES THIS MEAN INAJITSU VS ICHIDAI

"that wouldnt be any fun" uh you do realize you're talking about a person's physical health right audience member???

the. ace. is. not. the. only. player.

its okay this is the peanut gallery they dont matter in the long run

omg are the first years wearing their school uniform slacks

AWWWW TAKU OFFERED TO CARRY SAWAMURA'S BAG

taku always worried about everyone and sawamura looking rather nice actually

HLJSKFDHGD AMAHISA'S FACE LIGHTING UP AT EIJUN

omg was that a little bow eijun made at amahisa before moving on?

"something i want to ask you" are you boutta ask him out amahisa

im sorry i love eyes too much

and also! eijun getting the recognition he deserves!! buuuut from another team rip

cmon eijun he's trying to be nice tbh

lmao koushuu and shirakawa should meet... resting bitch face club

"i've never seen kousei-san take interest in another pitcher" THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO UNPACK IN THIS STATEMENT

LMAO HE DID HE DID ASK FOR HIS LINE

my sonsssss

yes asada and kuki, be free! go move around!

asdkfh i just squee every time taku

and these lines on koushuu look so nice??

intense son

scremmm

he's so happy and fired up to see koushuu fired up im

wholeass Sons™

lmao koushuu getting mad for sawamura

my inexperience... yes kataoka

teito and inajitsu coaches lmao

500K rivals to fwb to lovers

ive always thought kunitomo's neck crack is so funny

UHHHHH CARLOSHIRA REALLY TOYING WITH MY HEART HERE

THIS IS NOT OKAY

IM NOT OKAY

mochi looking mighty fine in this shot

aw... ejun sitting alone....

just wanna say oda and kuroki very lesbian in the ED

preview

ooh mei batting

sawamura and furuya watching so intently!!

INUI KENGOOOOOO

aw... eijun turning to harucchi for support

oh man third years...

SUMMARY (7/16):

eijun DOUBLES!!

rip seidou tho

amahisa's eyes??? pretty???

ATTACC BY INAJITSU CAMEO

taku offering to carry eijun's bag + serious senpai face

careful amahisa your gay is showing

koushuu mad on eijun's behalf lmao

inajitsu vs teito next!

7/23 LIVEBLOG:

ah yes, that tension-filled mimei look

CAN THEY STOP TESTING ME WITH CARLOSHIRA SCREENS

ooh this parallel of mei and mukai #1s

why does mei look so young at bat lmao

rather nice shot of mukai tbh

omg that tiny background akamatsu is adorable

WOW i love this shot

hell yeah mei kicking ass and taking names

boi... what you doin

KANETOU RIGHTS

kuraharu rights too!!

wow mochi's voice, never over it

BOI ARE THEY JUST SHOWING SHIPS LOOK AT MINORI

lookit mochi bein a good senpai

ooh eijun finally said no huh

mochi and harucchi look so concerned tbh i am too

mm and miyuki and furuya too huh

WHAT IS THIS BLEP STAHP

oowada always cracks me up lmao

esp when mine is so grave next to her

oh so mukai likes gambling? im not surprised lmaooo

INUI-SANNN I LOVE YOUUU

THE BOIIII

H E

H I M S T

omg the way tetsu says carlos sounds all proud and im soft

PRETTY BOIS DOIN J O B S

GETTIN THAT BREAD

omg two RBIs too good job shirakawa!!!

omg im so glad mei encouraged itsuki

have i ever mentioned

inui x mukai RIGHTS

ESP THIS SEQUENCE OF MUKAI (AND INUI) PRACTICING

BOIIII

that toujou face... some toujou and mukai art i saw comes to mind

DAMN THE IMAGE WHEN INUI HITS IM WOW

also is carlos actually wearing his compression undershirt holy wow

he didnt used to at least

ANYWAY INUI DINGERRRRRRRRRRRRRR

HELL YAHHH

omg was that a little tiger next to inui SO CUTE

oh my god "mei-san mei-san" too cute

LMAO TOO LONG

MEI I SWEAR

yoo mei you okay there

SLOW MO BALL

okay why does he look so good please

OKAY WHY DOES HE LOOK SO GOOD PLEASE

do you know how many times i had to rewind for this screenshot

shirakawa also looks good frustrated fuckle

mei stop shakin off signs dammit

ooh nice akamatsu shot

seidou shares one (1) brain cell in this screen

much too short a game damn...

ive heard we were robbed of itsuki's blush??? cause hello i need catcher catcher goodness with him and inui

omg... they're literal children

SSLKDFHLSKDHGSSTOPPPPPPPPP

IM WEAK OKAY

I KNOW IT

I ACCEPT IT

HOW DAREMSTDVE

AND HIS V O I C E

WTFFFFFFFFFFFFF

hahaha anyway im just laughing at carlos being a momentary harada

"mei-san" !!!

mei x mukai... so chaotic

wow amahisa looks so nice???

lmao they really didnt HAVE to put harucchi in the bg when miyuki's talking to furuya but they DID

miyuki... looking at mei too long not to be homo there

eijun :c

oh man

that really hurt

the face of a SON tho

"so you are human after all" so many things i want to say about this

sawamura... doesn't seem to hold a grudge against furuya at all and honestly wow...

tho its def not furuya's fault i think thats a mark of him being pretty mature!

anyway im glad furuya wants to watch the video too

also nabe!!!!! i wonder how close eijun and nabe are and how many times eijun has bothered him for the videos haha

ochiai, a backup catcher... interesting

"he must overcome this on his own" do you know how many problems there are with this statement

yeah it wasnt fair

"for better or for worse" are you kidding

oh furusawa lmaoo

and nabe just patient over there

oh hello masayui and kanetou

anime fist clench

koushuu!!!

oh man miyuki introspection......... i know where this is going.........

appreciating sawamura's hard work and optimism!!!!!

HE IS READY DAMMIT

how many more times does he have to prove it to you

loveLY but also reused?

WOW IM EMOTIONAL ALL THESE MEMORIES...

ALSO THIS IS PRETTY DAMN GAY...

and the shadow of miyuki in the background... WOW

three months............. until the third years retire...........................................

im not okA Y............................

all the things this smile hides

preview

BOI YOU ALREADY PITCH THAT WELL

wow too many sons

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

BABY TAKUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

AND BABY KOUSHUU

END CARD WITH MANAGERS AAA CUTE

SUMMARY (7/26):

mei kicking ass and taking names

mukai and his fooken BLEP

PRETTY INAJITSU BOIS DOIN JOBS

INUI DINGERRR

inui/mukai rights

mei + mukai actual CHILDREN

carloshira stop attaccing sun challenge f a iled

eijun @ harucchi :c

three months...

SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!

#daiya spoilers #daiya no ace act ii #daiya no ace #inajitsu #teito #seidou

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izzy-b-hands · 4 years ago

Text

In the weirdest fucking headspace today over two very intense dreams I had (that utterly fucked up my sleep last night, hence why I'm waking up at 12 in the fucking afternoon when I had an alarm set for ten lmao.)

Warning in advance that I'm on mobile and this post will be long, my apologies but I need to get this out now or I'm not even gonna be able to roll out of bed. TW for parts of the dreams which feature: a funeral, a funeral procession, issues with family, drowning/death via being swept out to sea, and also some odd romance/implied sex because sure why not apparently.

The first woke me up at like five, and was v weird but distinct:

Mum and I were getting to her car, that for unexplained reasons was parked at a local funeral home, which for some reason was on a hill (we don't have many hills here, v flat place, but in the dream it was all hills, almost mountains.) The implication I got in the dream was that it was the only parking spot left which is weird but sure I guess.

We didn't actually attend the funeral going on inside, but it finished up as we were trying to leave, discussing usual stuff we do before we go home like do we have the cash/feel lazy enough to get fast food on the way home instead of cook. And before mum could back out of the spot they started loading the hearse and ppl were all over the lot which pissed mum off, so she drove OVER THE FUCKING SIDEWALK AROUND PLANTS IN CEMENT PLANTERS ON THE SIDEWALK to get past them!

Which was half pointless anyway, because my grandparents were in their car right by the entrance/exit and made fun of her for doing that and for not wanting to be in the procession to the cemetery. Grandpa specifically told her 'theres a word for ppl who do what you do, we have a saying about you' and laughed at her, but wouldn't explain that further.

This next bit had me legit looking up funeral procession laws when I woke up. Because mum did get caught somehow behind the hearse even tho we'd left the lot well before it did? And was somewhat understandably flipping out because we weren't actually meant to be a part of the procession, we'd only parked there because there was nowhere else to. And if we looked back you could see my grandparents laughing at us for panicking, so finally mum broke the procession and headed up this v hilly road, winding, again almost mountainous. The last thing we saw was my grandparents looking at us and glaring. Mum kept freaking out abt how it wasn't her fault she'd had to break the law and break the procession, but she wasn't going to lose her job over all this (no idea what in the fuck that has to do with it all frankly, but she said it in the dream.)

I kept trying to calm her and said we could turn around, or pause in someone's driveway (the roads were all lined with familiar houses we've driven past irl) but she wouldn't calm, and the last thing I remember before I woke up was her turning the wheel harshly and hearing the tires skid on the edge of the very high up mountain road.

So needless to say that fucked me up and I didn't sleep again until abt eight, because I went to shower and try and chill out before crawling into my bed in my room, before I'd been passed out on the couch.

Only to then have this dream before I woke up just recently:

No family in this one, only band members from bands I like and their family (which is just my brain making a good casting decision I suppose lol.) Specifically, Queen and Avatar.

The issue was...odd. We were stuck very near the seaside, near a boardwalk that looked alarmingly similar to the one in GTA/that tbh you would see in any game modelled after the West coast. In a building that Brian (though in the dream, it was hard to know it was him?? Like him and Bri and Freddie and John kept switching ages, one minute it was 70s Bri, then suddenly Bri now, and it was hard to follow for some reason) knew and explained to us was an old boarding school building, often used for safety for folks during times of flooding.

And in the dream I just went sure yeah okay because I had no reason to believe otherwise, and also a storm was raging outside and had been for the entire dream. Like we could hear waves hitting the building constantly.

Which was extra dangerous, because the Avatar lads and their family members (I was told all their families were there, like Henrik's wife and kids plus Paky and Jacob with Johannes, Tim's pup was there, but I only saw them randomly for the rest of the dream after being told by John (Avatar John, to clarify lol) that they had brought everyone with them) were up on this balcony that we had been instructed (by who, no fucking clue, but we trusted them implicitly apparently) was the safest place in the building and measuring from it and the iron rod fencing around it that matched the same on the building across from us would ensure our safety more (if the waves hit with a certain strength on buildings too far apart, the buildings would both be washed out to sea. Does that make logical sense? Probably not anywhere irl, but it did in the dream.)

So the entirety of Avatar are up there trying to make these measurements, arguing with Bri and Rog especially over this even being helpful to do when

And you can laugh at this, because I did too when I woke up.

There were canoes we could rent (RENT. As if we would be able to bring them back lmao) downstairs instead!! In like a surf shack thing that was in the fucking school building apparently? And bless them for a bit they really thought we could ride out the storm in them (Tim offered to share one with me and his dog. It was v sweet lol.)

Unfortunately, we then immediately (all of us now somehow crowded on the balcony which was way too big for a balcony tbh) watched a bunch of ppl outside the building try to do just that. And they failed. Miserably.

We didn't see bodies, but you just knew they were dead. Paky was crying, John (Queen, since we had two Johns to deal with in this lol) was v upset and kept talking abt how that wasn't a baptism that would get them into Heaven.

So the canoe idea was abandoned even tho the salesdude kept calling up to us and offering what he had left. Nice dude, immediately got swept out to sea by the end of the dream.

Cut back to us on the balcony, panicking. Tim keeps thanking me for holding his dog so she doesn't jump into the sea (she had no intention, and spent the entire dream in his arms, mine, or Jonas's, snuggling and whimpering and it was Honestly Heart Wrenching.) I remind him we're in this together and it's no problem. He pulls me aside for what I'm going to politely censor and just call a v weird and frankly ill-timed makeout session (then again, maybe being about to be swept out to sea is the best time for that?? Idk, but I digress except to say he was a wonderful kisser, but also we both kept crying abt realising we were going to drown, so it was A Lot for both of us I think.)

When we return, Brian has let everyone know that the final calculations are that we will certainly be swept out to sea, but so long as the building stays upright?? We won't drown and die. How does he know this? No explanation was given.

I end up hunkered down with Freddie and Jim and Tim and his pup (the cats for Freddie and Jim I never saw, but heard yowling in their crates so. As safe as can reasonably be???) My Nisha apparently didn't get to go with me for this dream, because I did look for her at points, but couldn't find her (Tim cried with me over that too and helped, v supportive, and now outside of the dream may I say v kind of dream him to do that for me.)

And we just...waited. Knew death was coming, and could do nothing abt it. The only comfort we could reach was that it would be like a museum at the bottom of the sea. Freddie and Tim reasoned that the Titantic, if you could walk in the ruins, might be like that. All old clothes and bones and ppls stuff. And so the school building we were in would be like that too, and we all agreed we liked museums, so maybe it wasn't the worst way to go.

Then the wave actually hit though, and it was just fkn chaos. Tim hanging onto his dog and my waist, myself hanging onto Freddie and Jim by the loops on their jeans (how tf that didn't just rip my fingers off, no idea. *Dream Magic*)

I realized horrifically that as we went down, the building was literally falling apart, bricks and iron work bars flying around us. And all I could see were bones when I looked down into the water, bones from every era but particularly Victorian by the clothes on them for some reason.

What was particularly cruel in this dream was that it ended with a false awakening. I 'woke up' to Tim's arm around my waist, and his nose nuzzling at my neck, asking me wtf I was dreaming abt because I was kicking him and could I pls stop? (Fair request, that's honestly an irl problem that my legs apparently have always tried to fight off bad dreams on their own, much to the bruises and regret of anyone who shares my bed.) And just as I turned around to answer him and tell him how fkn scared I was and how grateful I was he was there and ya know, not dead and drowned,

I woke up for real, alone, in my actual bed.

So now I'm feeling extra lonely, fucked up, and honestly peeved that the dream interpretation dictionary I usually use isn't helping much to make sense of any of this.

#text post #tw death #tw drowning #tw dream interpretation #i guess??? kind of lol #tw funerals #not sure of any other tws to add rn #but if y'all want something added lemme know!!!#and here we see how even when i sleep deeply enough to dream i often wake up and feel weird and exhausted lmao #i really could go off more abt the bits with Tim in this too but i dont wanna be like inappropriate or anything #i know it wasn't real of course it just felt so dang real

0 notes

loveerinn · 5 years ago

Text

Old Poetry. Just in any order.

April 8, 2019 5:27am

The Reality: You Felt Like Love To Me

you felt like love to me

question: why’d it choke me

worse why’d you hold me

like it was an arrest

lol why am i talking in past tense

this is my future and i wish someone would’ve let me know

but ig you reap the seeds you sow

you see it’s my fault... i don’t know how but let it be

i’ve fallen into a habit of thinking all problems actually stem from me

anyways that’s the consequence, the hell I face from liking you

i think my error was letting the emotions brew

deep inside me bubbling to burst

i rarely say how i feel so it’s not a first

i can’t get your hands off but you’d never touch

wondering if that’s fate’s way of giving me luck

cause i know if you did i’d be wrecked

cause either way you’d be lost and my axis would offset

i must just be incredibly pathetic

writing art for a girl never gonna get it

it being relative

theoretically holding kinship to my heart

fuck or is it hers? wait where did this metaphor start

stop... red light, yellow, green

freeze

let reverse that line .. actually i’m gonna take out the keys

therefor no ignition no kitchen no Kelly’s are ya feeling me

baby why didn’t anyone tell this girl she was gonna be walking blindly

i’m not talking pragmatically, realistically i’m all seeing

everything but my insides and what your genes (jeans) has me believing

shit like love damn it’s chaos, in a figure of speech

symbolic or whatever, maybe that was an overreach

regardless i’m trying to get myself together

can’t waste time thinking about a stranger

it’s funny cause i am to myself too,

the joke is i don’t know me but i know and remember you

i’m trying to convince myself you’re a bad person

are there bad people

maybe me trying to justify my pain with incrimination in the first degree

it’s a roaring fire and it burns cause i’m also asking myself “is she?”

ya see i’m not convinced on either side it’s concerning

discerning that i don’t know what lessons i’m suppose to learning

my feelings are chains jumbled twisted and locked

i don’t know where they begin and which areas to pull apart

where the ends of my being my feeling and sanity truly start

why am i more than one?

beings of a person that i know none

my core of different intricate faces

to deal with the phases of my spaces of reality

insanity

of a world i know none

broken promises of another song and symphonic poem

telling you we’d be forever, like it was a demand

realizing now i was begging reaching clawing with my hands

to keep the fatal fragile balance of what it is that i needed

what you mean to me and it hurts that it can’t be receded

i want it to stop!

i want it to end

every part and nook and cranny to bend out of your reach AND—-

fuck you god screw you-sorry that was erin

i frequently dissociate which is funny cause i’m so present

exfoliate the inside, gifting public so pleasant

i’m wrapped up, sat up, snapped up, cash up

money high for a new me

gotta scrap gotta buy bleed

coins not in my possession

i actually have a confession

its surgical now,

sponge!

wipe me up and lunge deeper

scalpel!

gotta tackle with what you find

suture!

sew up the future of what’s no longer mine

operation completed and set in stone

life has a funny way of testing what you think you own

not that she was belonged hardly was the case

just no longer in my life so everything’s feeling a little displaced

flat line even... like a procedure gone wrong it’s fucking scary

the way love ...fucking love makes you very ..

weak ...people say strong

i call bullshit.

i’ve never been so bare and lifeless and addicted

it’s heroine & i can’t quit

it’s a job that never ends

break the boundaries of 9-5,

i’m on and off the clock for a friend

well no not .. no.. actually that’s not true not anymore,

that’s the part that keeps knocking me till i’m sore

dying inside but erika says it’s fine tho lmao

but you know uterika has never been so damn exposed

she’s lost and writing books for poems at almost 5am

wondering if she’s gonna be so damaged by her next “friend”

except no it’ll never be that deep

she’s in her bag cause it’s the part of her heart she’ll reap

cause she knows

you never truly forget the way something ...someone made you feel

all she has is the hope that she’ll love another person harder so these feelings... just no longer feel real

Loveeee Erin

0 notes

historic-homosexual · 6 years ago

Note

Pls pls pls do all the oc questions!!

jokes on you I was already doing that and planned on just putting it out there but now I can use this as an excuse,,hah someone wants to know thisI’m sorry for how long some parts got, I noticed how much I wrote on Célestin and tried to keep it down from then but that didn’t completely work,,,And actually I dare/tag you to do these too. I know that ain’t normal proceedure w ask memes but I do a thing called what I want

1. Your first OC ever?

I think my first oc was your typical mary sue, named Angel, whom I used for basically every fandom I got in then. I’ve since reworked her because I couldn’t leave her the mess she was lmao

2. Do you have a personal favourite among your OCs?

Not really, tho I have to admit I have some that I’m especially fond of, but that’s still like half of my ocs

3. Have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else?

Not a full character but a friend of mine made the design for Charlie years ago

4. A character you rarely talk about?Sadly that’d also be a couple of em, for example Eleonore or Otávio or my monster ocs

5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be?

That’s a difficult one…Brist is pretty worked out and good so maybe him, or Eligos bc I’m proud of their design

6. Two OCs of yours that look alike despite not being related?

I’d never noticed it before this but Seth and Elijah oh geez

7. Are your OCs part of any story or stories?I have a bunch of ocs that are part of my own work, which I refer to as ‘Golden Empire’

8. Do you RP as any of your OCs? If you do, introduce one of your RP OCs here!

I privately rp w @spokoystviye, namely our ocs Regulus and Adelais. We used to do Gregory and Jason too but ever since we worked on the time it plays in that’s stopped lmao.

So Regulus it is: Regulus Whitlock, living in France during the French Revolution. He’s originally from England, where he grew up the son of a Blacksmith. Regulus is exceptionally tall for the time he lived in, very soft hearted and believes in “dressing like a gentleman,behave like a bastard”. Most part of his life he works as a Blacksmith from his shop, that he took over from his father after the man died. Regulus took on a ‘side job’ as a hunter, smart, a good shot and with a great need to help people. But he’s of too good nature, ending up taking in a Vampire of all things, despite better judgement, not able to leave the woman to her death.

9. Would you ever be willing to give any of your OCs to someone else?

I don’t think I could give an oc to a random person, that is one that I’ve worked w a lot. Just making a design and such for the purpose of giving it away in the first place would be fine

10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design?

Gerwyn is relatively complicated to draw solely because his base design is full body armor lmao. Besides him maybe Susanna and Nathanael since their design is hard to make it look accurate especially without colouring it

11. Is there any OC of yours you could describe as a “sunshine”?

Seth, definitely, he’s the most positive and sweet of all my Ocs

12. Name an OC that isn’t yours but who you like a lot

Both @bruhchantite and @spokoystviye have ocs I love, like Bruhs Arcana Oc Nien, whom I like a lot, and Leander has Adelais who’s a sweet baby deserving protection [also Adelean is hot shit]

13. Do you have any troublemaker OCs? There are quite a few I’d say lmao

But most of them I’d consider more violent than troublemaker, so Jonathan probably (whos still violent but who was a troublemaker even before that)

14. Tragic Backstory

Gregory and Annora have a tragic backstory as well but I’m gonna go w Célestin rnTw: Rape, Abuse, Homophobia

Célestin Villeneuve grew up in France to very religious parents with strict views. Célestins mother had unhappily carried out Célestin, having gotten pregnant at a very young age. Both her and her husband being strong believers, they considered abortion a sin and kept the child. Her own parents threated it like a shameful secret, making their daughter and her boyfriend marry, despite them being 16 at the time. They moved to the next town, where they were unknown and had everyone belive that they were both adults, their child concieved properly, after marriage and willingly.

Not having finished their education properly, Célestins father lied in order to get a job, his wife mroe than willing to keep up his tales, in fear of being ridiculed by the community. Appearance and what others thought of them became the most important thing to Célestins mother early on, drilled into her by her own parents.Célestins father craved to be popular and keep his image in the town.

They were active in church and his father insisted on going to every sunday mass, prayers before lunch and his child confessing his sins to him.Punishment often consisted of simple bread and cheese and water for meals, a swat ont he back of his head if it was particularly bad in his parents eyes.

Célestin had always been a perfect child, smart and following his parents wishes, sitting in church, firm in prayer.He considered his parents treatment right, and, as he kept from sin, was confident it would never get any worse.However, he was gravely mistaken.As he got older, Célestins parents would get worse in their punishment, afraid their child would sully their image, as they themselves had, with the early pregnancy.

Things reached a peak when Célestin discovered he was gay. Knowing it to be a sin, he told his mother, asking her for help to free him of this condition, telling her he’d accept the punishiment if it’d only make him right in God’s eyes again.

His mother was shocked, less so because of her sons sexuality, but more so because she had seen the violence raging in her husband and was well aware that he would no longer keep the punishment to a few slaps.Talking to her husband that night, when Célestin was asleep, she attempted to sway her husband, who was as she had expected, beyong angered.

He however knew of her fear for being casdt out of the community and explained that not punishing and correcting such behaviour would result in Célestin believing it was normal and flaunting it around for everyone to see. Riddled by fear, Célestins mother accepted her husbands preposition as what would happen to her son.

While Célestin had expected punishment, nothing would have prepared him for what would come for him as his father would drag him out to the field each day anew, whipping him until his back was bleeding. His wife was fobidden to tend to her sons wounds and was often standing by staring into nothing while her son begged for forgiveness.

Célestin learned how to poorly tend to his own injuries, some getting infected at the lack of proper treatment. To his own shock no beating did help to cure him as he had desperately hoped to happen to stop the violent treatment. Unsure where to turn, and why God would have him suffer like this, despite all attempts and prayer, Célestin went to the church to confess and ask a pastor for help.The man was shocked and appalled at what he heard and even more so at the fact that Célestin was under the impression that this was right.

For the first time Célestin was told that he was treated terribly, and that he had done nothing to deserve this. He went away with odd feelings in his mind and the first seeds of doubt. Attempting to help, the pastor went to talk to Célestins parents a few days later, when Célestin himself was in school, trying to sway them in their ways, telling them that they surely had to know that he had to report such behaviour.

When Célestin returned from school, he found his mother crying adn his father angrier than hed ever been. They’d not taken the pastors warning to take their son away to their heart, seeing their fault in their actions but instead saw nothing but the ridicule they were about to face, as well as the authorities coming up. Célestins father feared to loose his job, and face, more than he feared for his sons life. He beat Célestin again before dragging him into his parents room, where a middle aged woman was waiting that was known throught the town for offering any kind of intercourse for the right money.

Saying that there was only one way to truly fix him, Célestins father forced his son to have sex with the prostitute, watching with a belt in hand to make sure the intercourse was actually carried out. During it he would often ask his son if he was still filthy, wanting to do this with ofther men and woulod generally insult and hummiliate him. Whenever his son would answer with crying or begging his father to stop this, he would simply pay the woman for yet another round.

When it was finally over, Célestin was left laying in his parents bed, listening as his parents were having dinner in the kitchen.Filled with shame he declined everything when the authorities came knocking at their door the next day, nodding of his fathers claim that he had made it all up.

The pastor attempted to speak to Célestin but when he asked to see the boy the evening, he and Célestins parents found his room empty.Célestin had ran away.

15. Do you like to talk about your OCs with other people?

Gosh I love it I wish I could do it more. I feel if u actually have some else to chat ocs with it leads to ur oc getting more and more fleshed out

16. Which one of your OCs would be the best at biology (school subject)?

I think Helva would take the cake on that one

17. Any OC OTPs?

Regulus/Adelais, Caspian/Nadia, Hunter/Piper and Araan/Dorian,,,,If I can be honest, I hardly have the amount of Oc ships as I would lmao,,,my ocs do function on their own but there are so I’d just love to ship lmao

18. Any OC crackships?

Not really any, I shortly thought about just taking a random oc from u/Leander and pairing them randomly w one of mine for the laughs of it.But then I felt it would maybe be inapropriate to do that lmaoo

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)

While all my Ocs mean a lot to me I chose Brist for this because he’d the first Oc I made for a game, fallout new vegas, which I love a lot. He pretty much develpoed all by himself while I was playing, and is really fleshed out now. I’m super fond of him somehow.Here are a couple of things about him:

Brist was born 2225, the son of caravaneers, somewhere on their travels and therefore does not know where exactly he was born. Deciding that raising a child at such young age while traveling would not work well, they settled near the ruins of Ashton and Hopeville, where a small community was build.Brist spend his childhood in the Divide and soon began traveling alongside his father, keeping the community flourishing as the only connection between it and the rest of the land. When the Divide and the road paved by Brist came to attention of the NCR, they cooperated to protect the supply line and keep it open for other traders. With that done and his home taken care of, Brist left the Divide to travel further, exploring New California as a drifter.

Brist came to enjoy the life of a Drifter, occasionally taking small jobs and living from day to day up until returning to the divide a last time, making a delivery that would cause his home to be destructed.Not knowing of what had happened, Brist returned into the Mojave desert, further traveling New California before joining the Mojave Express.2281 he was hired to deliver another important package, once more without knowledge of what it would cause, and was shot in the head by Benny in Goodsprings.

He doesn’t sleep too much, and he’s not at all picky about where. He prefers having some sort of mattress but if he’s tired and there’s none he’ll sleep on the floor.

Brist is an Courier and Explorer at heart, determined to finish his jobs, power through them. Even if that might result in physical pain or poisoning. Brist has the constant need to be on his feet all the time, traveling, looking around or doing things for people and he often does not sleep, eat, shower or talk during these travels. Sometimes he’s so focused on the road ahead that he misses the explosive traps right in front of him.

He notices that he is doing this, and he can sometimes be heard muttering to himself how he’ll see a doctor in the next town and so on, but those good intentions always get lost along the way. Brist hates missing traps and such, but he doesn’t quite see that those thigns could easily be avoided if he’d be more careful.

He is suffering from Radiation Poisoning, he could easily be treated for it at the early stages but he literally does not care enough to see a doctor or get some RadAway. He keeps delaying it in favour of missions and traveling and stuff

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?

Charlie sings, more for herself actually, than for anyone else but she’s quite good at it. She’s constantly humming when she’d focusing on something and sometimes doesnt even notice when she starts singing along to songs. She simply loves music a lot and lets herself be taken along by the songs. Has no real preference for genre but she likes happy go lucky songs most

21. Your most artistic OC

Richard aka Dick. He’s at tattoo artist and leaves cool little doodles everywhere. Especially great with colours. The most colorful the better

22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how?

There aren’t really any, since my ocs arent popular or anything. Someone did sometimes, but it was more forcing their ideas or their own thoughts w their own ocs on mine,,,

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

Gregory, as you see below has changed quite a bit. While the overall design is the same, now he looks as nasty as I imagine him to be, a lot less soft.Character-wise my ocs didn’t change drastically

Only the fact, in Gregory’s case, that he got more fleshed out, and the time he lives in changed, to the 50sI’m trying to not write to many long things here lmao.Especially since just u and Leander will read this and Leander knows himst and Regulus already.

Dr Gregory Thomas Landon was born 1911 to Sybill and Raphael Landon. While the first world war almost went by without having any impact on the family, Raphael was pulled into war when America joined in 1917 and died in combat.

With her husband gone and her son just 6 years old, Sybill took a job as a secretary to make sure of her and her sons survival.Sybill had grown up the youngest child (of those who had survived) out of 5, always too smart and abitious for a woman in her time. Her father was Doctor and she would often sneak into his office room to look through notes and books on human anatomy and patient records.She had written down what she believed could be links between illnesses,behaviour and anatomy, finding the greatest interest in the still very new field of psychology. Of course her father wanted to hear nothing of it, Sybills oldest brother being the one ment to inherit their fathers office and place as a doctor.

But Sybill had never stopped being interested in psychology, following the work of Edward Titchner, whod brought psychological studies to America, as well as the rise of ‘structuralism’ ,as close as possible.Unlike Titchner, who excluded the study of children, Sybill wondered if it was the childs mind that should be studied to find the roots of all things. Perhaps it was bitterness above all that drove her to the treatment of her son in the following years. Sybill had lived her life knowing that she had no possibility whatsever to porperly study psychology and work on her theories. But hearing about Margaret Washburn, the woman that had been able to become a psychologist, Sbyill turned anger and disappointment to her son, whom she viewed as the reason she had to stay at home and be a mother isntead of trying to achieve what Ms Washburn had.

Quickly she realized however that she did not need a title or be thought by a Doctor to test her theories, deciding to conduct them on her son, who had kept her from fullfilling her dream. While Gregory was not the perfect research object, already six years and not a infant, who Sybill believed to be the ideal stage, she attempted to see if continous infliction of pain would change her sons behaviour.

She was especially curious if such pain inflicted on the brain would influence Gregorys personality, perhaps causing of curing misbehaviours and such. Gregory would grow up very intelligent but withdrawn, hardly finding kinship with people his age, spending his time reading. Like his mother before him he became interested in the human mind and, unlike Sybill, was able to study, earning him a Doctorate in both psychology and psychiatry

While he remained living with his mother he would sometimes roam the university campus, especially after long nights of studying, observing the people around.

It was there that he, at age 19, that he met a young woman that had been wandering around, lost and visibly pregnant. Seeing her caused a deep shock in Gregory as she resembled his mother in looks like no other woman he’d even seen before. Unbeknowns to his mother, Gregory had suffered great damage from her treatment of him, which had lead to violent thoughts and great apathy. Had the girl not approached him, she would have lived but she decided to ask him for help, ending in her death.

This remained the only unplanned murder commited by the Doctor, who hid her body, laying awake at night, working out what to do with her. He had carefully opened her up, not focused on her death as much as on causing her pain for as long as possible, but as he hadn’t been very ecperienced yet he had made quite a mess. The young woman would turn to the first in a row of women that caused Gregory to perfect his work and disposal of the bodies.

World War Two brought a sudden end to the Doctors murder streak. Age 30 when America entered the War he was pulled into it as a medic, despite not being properly trained as a Doctor

However his talents that he had perfected during his murders had been of great use during the war that had only led to Gregory becoming even more cold to death and gore. Returning from the War he was offered a position at a instiution, as the need for Psychologists arose.

However Gregory saw no great interest in treating shell shocked patients for too long, he instead chose to focus on the psychiatric field, working in an asylum from then on. Gregory is, while extremely smart, speaking four languages and being a Doctor, unable to form any bonds with people.

He’s terribly arrogant and aware of his intelligence, viewing it as a superiority to other people. He suffers from antisocial personality disorder/ psychopathy and is addicted to nictotine.

He’s a very cleanly person, almost to a point of it being an obsession. He smells of Nicotine, Disinfectant and a neutral perfume.

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?

Oh geez, well I’d rather meet an oc of mine thats like, one of the chill ones. Maybe someone about my age.

Someone like Friedrich or Violet. It’d be easiest to talk to them, and I know they are super nice. Meeting Brist, Araan or Caspian would be cool too tho, so many stories and questions there

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)

There used to be the joke that Friedrich is basically a tall, muscular version of me. Funnily enough I now have the chin beard as well, and I’ve discovered that I’m as much of a nerd and work focused person as he is. Still while we share some similarities, we’re p different still lmao

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will?

Not really, only changed things to be more accurate and stuff but that aint against my will or anything

27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song? Nope

28. Your most dangerous OC?

There are a couple, such as Cenric (being a crazy, megalomanic, narcisstic, manic Emperor), Gregory and Jonathan (literal serial killers), Crya (cannibalistic monster) and Eligos (p much does body disposal).

29. Which one of your OCs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going?

Eddy and Dick, they would tell each other because they’d go together lmao. Paula would want to and just before going there she’d chicken out of it

30. Which one of your OCs would most likely have a secret stuffed animal collection? Quinn, he’s tall and grown up but he loves small and cute things

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

Friedrich II:Would have a super cool layout that he coded himself, and would offer the theme for people to use, as well as giving people tips on how to easily do cool things w their themes.

His icon would’ve been fairytale themed for a while until he posts his first selfie for pride month, then it’s a picture of him with a pride flag. He’d reblog peoples art of fairytales, and he’d especially love peoples new interpretations of them

Would reblog thing about rats and post pictures of his own rats with cute captions. Reblogs peoples selfies during pride and other pride days ( like trans day of visibility n such), always adding super nice things in the tags.

He posts his first selfie during pride and it gets quite the reblogs and people asking to see more (half of them are thirsting after his body) Declines the request to post full topless pictures because he says that his blog is sfw and he doesnt want to mix fairtales, rats and codes with nudes.

He would have a nsfw blog tho,,,hes horny He’d give it to those over 18 that’d ask, reblogging gifs and stuff there and yeah thats where he posts topless pictures.

32. Which one of your OCs would be the most suitable horror game protagonist and why?

I’d like to say Brist because that would be funny as hell and he would actually explore everything, pretty unfazed by what is going on. But honestly Annora is already living a horror game pretty much, that is with loosing her parents, fighting for survival,being used by the revolution group as a ‘chosen one’, and especially because she has to encounter the wandering twins, which are creepy as heck. She’s a fighter against will but she pulls through and shes careful enough not to do something stupid.

33. Your shyest OC?

That’d be sweet, pure Charlie

34. Do you have any twin characters?

Oh yes, Eddy and Dick; Jae-Eun and Jae-Hyeok; Nathanael and Susanna

35. Any sibling characters?

There’s a lot coming your way

Cenric and his younger sister Annora

Sadira and her older brother Arshad

Gregory actually has a halfbrother that’s not really developed, named Maximilian

Charlie and her younger sister Paula

Olivia and her older brother Bill

Arthur and his younger brother Jonathan

36. Do you have OC pairs where the other part belongs to someone else (siblings, lovers, friends etc)?

The above mentioned Adelais who belongs to Leander, is let’s say semi-paired w Regulus

Established girlfriends Sadira (who’s my oc) and Elizaveta (who is his)

Violet (mine) and Cole (his) sweet young love

And an AU Version of my oc Echo is the ex of Ninas OC Crem

Charlie used to be w the oc Amy of a friend but idk if that’s still a thing

37. Introduce an OC who is not quite human

There are a few, like Myka, Viida, Amodis,Brist, Rovhen and Araan but I think I’ll go with Cyra

Cyra, or ‘Venus Cyra’ is not as developed as some others here so not to worry about too long of a text,,,,I hope

Cyra is meant to exist around the 50s funnily enough, just like Gregory, which I really didn’t intend lmaoShe is,a s the question suggests, not quite human, despite maintaining a relaticely human appearance for most of the time. Cyra lives in a house in the fictional Bloomstreet, which has been declared haunted decades ago because of a man living inside of it that took great joy in messing with his neighbours.

Crya believes herself to have lived in the house all of her life, with no memory as to how she got to come there and why she can’t leave it.In truth it’s told that she moved in with her grandmother when Cyra was just a baby, having lost her parents. If you were to believe the whispers and legends the old woman was very poor, hardly able to keep the small house for her and her granddaughter.

She would wear the same old clothes she had arrived in, the young girl wearing a worn out dress with a pale blue bow. Legends say that they were so poor that the grandmother couldn’t afford to buy much more than bread and water.

A police man came to their door one day because the old woman hadn’t been able to pay for her house anymore. Desperate, it’s said that she hit the man across the head as he had bend down to say hello to Cyra, who looked famished and sick at that point.

Not sure what to do with the body and knowing that her granddaughter needed more than bread to survive and grow, she went to butcher the man and cook him into stew for herself and her granddaughter to eat. As she saw that Cyra became more healthy and stronger at the meat consumption, the old woman, desperate and hopeful to keep her beloved granddaughter alive, fully turned to cannibalism.

It’s said that the grandmother died a couple of years later of old age but legends have it that she is still in the house as well, a half dead monster. Cyra, having eaten human flesh all her life is said to have turned into a wendigo like creature,fully turning into a gruesome beast during the nights, to feed on the flesh of people that dare to enter the haunted house.

She is called Venus in some tales because a man claimed to have seen her one day, watering the roses in the lawn of the house, more beautiful than anything he had seen all his life, calling her ‘a sight like the goddess Venus herself’

Cyra isn’t fully aware of these legends, but she is aware of her monsterous nature, that she is unable to control. She believes she was cursed to stay in this house, a monster taking her place during night, leaving her with the remains of peoiple and the ravaging craving for human flesh.

She loved taxidermy and moths, and tending to flowers.

38. Which one of your OCs would be the best dancer?

Irina is a professional ballet dancer so I’d say she’s the best out of my Ocs

39. Introduce any character you want

Alright, because I’ve tought about them recently, I’ll cheat a bit and introduce two ocs: Susanna and Nathanael, whom I mentioned somewhere above briefly as ‘The Wandering Twins’

They are part of my Golden Empire universe and are the heads of one of the groups that build after the collapse of most of what we know of the Earth.

They play a part in Annoras journey to find her brother as both a danger to avoid/defeat, as well as potential allies. Susanna and Nathanael are twins that are both about 1,90m tall and are constantly veiled, having stapled veils to their faces and necks.

That adds to their ghostly,creepy appearance. You could describe their group as a cult,as it is religiously motivated and their followers are devoted to Susanna and Nathanael, who they call ‘Mother’ and ‘The Priest’

That could come fromt he fact that Susanna wears the traditional headwear of a nun, while Nathanael looks somewhat like a Priest and carries a bible around. Christianity is considered an old and outdated religion in the times that GE plays in, practiced by a very small amount of people before the collapse. It’s generally thought of as outdated and outlandish, with stories too wild to be real.

However some of the old text have been recovered or been carried on over generations by those that remain firm believers in the Christian God. Susanna and Nathanael were raised by such a family and spread their belief to vulnerble and scared people after the collapse that latch onto it as a form of explanation easily.

The Twins view the collapse as a sort of apocalypse brought by God to punish Humanity for their sins, they believe that they must attone and suffer now as Earth was made their purgatory. If one is firm in belief and enough suffering is done, so they say, Heaven will open up and they will be taken by God to heaven, forgiven and able to forget the horrors they went through on Earth.

They expect that suffering to be done by their followers, who all walk barefoot, some of them having blinded themself in order to see nothing but God in their lifes. Susanna and Nathanael as well as their group wander in order to spread their message, taking in new followers if they prove their faith by stripping themselves of their footwear and walking through the ruins of cities with them until their feet bleed.

Only if they are willing to shed blood for their sins will they be taken on and be bathed and baptized in a river and dressed in simple gowns.It is considered the highest honour to be veiled just like Susanna and Nathanael. They seem to be able to appear out of nowhere and have a settlement in the woods that they return to.

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

I love developing oc things w my friends, its always a lot of fun and I wish I could do that more. Especially nice was cosplaying Gregory and Jason w Leander,,,cosplaying ocs is rad af, would love to do that again

41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)

Yeee, mostly you and Leander actually, but a couple of others too. Let me see if I can show u a favourite oc art from u and from Leander

@bruhchantite listen,,,this is so fucking cute, I love seeing our kids all together. All art of them is always so happy and positive. I love every piece u did of em but this one especially bc,,,bringing star wars into it??Power move

@spokoystviye okay listen you made soo many great pieces but this one,,,this one idk maybe its because I love Brist so much but,, this is simple yet amazing. I love the small light play u got in here and just how u drew Brist,,,thats me boy!!!

42. Which one of your OCs would be the most interested in Greek gods?

Cenric, I’d say. He thinks of himself as a god after all. I think he’d like the imagery of it all

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

Oh geez well,, I generally make my ocs older than me, like most of them are in their late 30s/40s, I have more ocs heading 60s than I have heading 20 lmao. My ocs are more often male than any other gender and more likely to be lgbt than straight. I like nice and clean looks, Leander can tell a great deal about how much I care for a clean look lmao. Most of my ocs have their life in order, and most of them are on the taller side

44. Something you like about your OCs in general

I put thought into my characters,so I think that makes them interesting and fun. And I try very hard to havbe them make sense and be time/lore appropriate.

45. A character you no longer use?

I did drop some Ocs a bit ago that never got much work and that I didn’t think interesting enough to work on. Sadly enough I don’t do as much w my ocs as I’d like to generally.

46. Has anyone ever told you that you treat your OCs badly?

Nope, I’m generally kind to my characters lmao

47. Has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your OCs as their child?

both Nina and Leander did and I think it’s v sweet hell yeah

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

Charlie and Caspian, truly good and pure, and positive

49. Which one of your OCs would most likely enjoy memes

Seth would definitely love memes. So would Kylan but he’d like the really weird ones best. Eddy and Dick would constantly send memes to each other, effectively annoying everyone else. Paula would like memes when they are already outdated

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

Generally special universe oc seem to be more interesting than like,,basic universe ones but I wannt quickly talk abour my OC WilliamI love him okay? He’s from Russia, where he grew up in a tightly knit family. He’s a childrens Doctor and was married to Nahia, who’s an ER Doctor. They met in med school and got along super well, they both were used to the whole early marriage idea and marrying someone you like so they did just that. They both always wanted to have children and kid. It’s very important for them to be there for thgeir child despite their jobs. William is such a dad, he loves his child so much, he’d do anything for em. He and Nahia are best friends, even after the divorce, which happened after long talks because they had noticed that something was off. It led to William confessing that he thinks he might be gay and they ended up divorcing because it turns out yes he is. William probably would’ve stayed w Nahia, also for their childs sake but she wouldn’t hear anything of it. He’s a very kind man, calm and I love the thought of him being able to explore who he is even at his age. He’d be so new to everything,,sobs,,angel

#ask #type: text #type: oc facts #redbluemaiden

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ejmcmoon · 7 years ago

Text

HP and the Birthday Weekend: HBP Reaction

So I’ve been doing reactions for Freeform’s HP marathon. Freeform is skipping OotP, so here’s HBP (stupid Freeform). If you don’t want spoilers, don’t read.

Poor Harry. He looks so sad while his picture’s being taken. Poor kid needs a break.

I’ve always found it weird that the Death Eaters can fly without brooms. In the books, only Voldy and Snape can do it. Here it seems like they just add it for flashy effects.

Lol Dumbles is like “Forget the pretty girl and take my arm.”

Slughorn is so damn Extra. He fucking destroyed the place so that it looks like he’s already attacked. What a drama queen.

“I do love knitting patterns” Dumbledore is the embodiment of gay stereotypes and I’m not sure whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing.

YASSS the twins’ joke shop!

“How much is this?” “Five galleons” “How much for me?” “Five galleons” “I’m your brother” “Ten galleons” I LOVE THESE TWo

When Fenrir Greyback almost saw the trio spying on the Malfoys in Borgin&Burkes, I got literal CHILLS

GINNY’S SO CUTE WITH HER PYGMY PUFF

Honestly, I don’t understand why Romione (especially Ron) don’t think Malfoy is a death eater. After all the animosity between them and Malfoy, I think they’d be a little suspicious Malfoy.

DRACO STOP BEING A BITCH

Lo Flitwick is being petty af

Luna’s great. “No but I’ve done several toes. How different can they be, really?”

Hermione gets mad at Ron for eating while Harry’s missing, but honestly I would be too. It’d be more like stress eating, but still.

Draco looks so depressed my poor bby

Minnie ain’t got time for that slacking off shit lmao. Also, I feel so bad for Ron. People always sideline him for Harry

OMGS SEAMUS IS StILL BLOWING UP SHIT

Okay, but the potions lesson scene is the one time where Hermione’s hair is as frizzy as should be. Smh

Ugh, NO DUMBLES. Harmione is NOT a thing. It’s all about Hinny and Romione.

I really wish they’d shown more of Voldy’s memories. They were really important plot points.

Whose decision was it to make Draco consistently have a green apple? Not that it’s bad but I’d just like to know which department instigated the Drapple fandom.

“SHUT IT” The one part where Movie Ginny acted like she was SUPPOSED TO

Why you little snitch Ron. Harry’s relationship with his book is very intimate and personal (Jk I love Ron.)

Ron jfc. Ginny can snog whoever she wants to

“What if she saw you here snogging me? Would you expect her to get up and leave?” Hermione you sly mofo.

Aww look at Hermione wrapping her arms around her boys

Katie NUUUUUU

“Why is it when something happens, it is always you three?” Because they’re protagonists and shit must always hit the fan around them

“How grand it must be to be the chosen one” Would you like some fries with that salt, Sev?

“She’s got nice skin” YES SKIN THAT YOU WOULD LIKE TO KISS

“Hermione’s got nice skin” Lol they’re both WHIPPED

Belby devouring his desert like a caveman is my aesthetic and mood whenever ice cream is in the vicinity

Good job Harry just abruptly stand up and making A HUNDRED TIMES MORE AWKWARD

Ron why are you acting all condescending?! She low-key asked you to the dinner party!

Have I mentioned how much I LOVE Luna’s lion hat?

YAS GINNY YOU FLY THAT BROOM LIKE A BAMF

Damn the Weasleys are on fire today

“You didn’t put it in. Ron only thought you did” Yes because Harry is slick af and also Slytherdor af.

“I think this room’s taken” Yes now gtfo. Also, I hate how Lavender was black but they made her white when she had any huge significance to the story

“But I am the chosen one” *slap* Come on Hermione let the boy have some confidence. Hitting him is a bit abusive

LOL when Cormac threw up on Snape’s shoes I was like, “Boi you’re fucked.”

Wow Lavender is so extra. She has good writing on foggy windows skills, tho. Mine usually turn out really ugly

I wish she’d (Ginny) fed him a canary cake and then he turned into a canary. And ugh Ron is such a cockblock.

Ugh they fucked up all of the ships in this movie? All of the Hinny scenes were awkward as hell and Ronks wasn’t even canon during that burrow scene.

Speaking of the Burrow scene, I think it’s cool, but they could’ve taken it out to include scenes like Voldy’s other memories, Hinny scenes that aren’t bullshit, tc.

Also, Ginny wouldn’t have just been STANDING there letting Harry defend her. She’d’ve hexed those Death Eaters into next week!

“Excuse me while I go and vomit” I’d wanna vomit too Mione

Oh gods here comes the scene where Harry is so unbelievably not smooth about asking Slughorn for the memory. Prepare for a massive cringe attavk.

“Is that what you told Tom Riddle, sir?” WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN IDIOT HARRY???? LIKE FUCK

“The map’s wrong” THE MAP NEVER LIES HERMIONE

“They [the cauldron cakes] were lying on your bed. I thought I’d try one.” Oh Ron your love for food is gonna be the death of you.

Rupert’s acting like he’s wasted is spot on. OMGS when he hugs Slughorn, tho!!!

Gods Slughorn is such an incompetent teacher. DON’T JUST STAND THERE DO SOMETHING GOSH DAMMIT

“And for the record, I’ve always found him interesting” We know Mione we know.

Ugh wonderful the Sectumsempra scene is close. Harry does so many things that give me second-hand embarrassment in this movie.

What I don’t get is how Lav is at a different table when she’s in Gryffindor. They could’ve had her sit at the Gryffindor table for the trio’s in sync judging stare

OH NO THE SCENE’S COMING

NO HARRY DON’T DO IT YOU BLOODY IDIOT

UGHHHHHHHHHHH

“Did you and Ginny do it then?” “What?” “Hide the book?” *wiggles eyebrows* They did more than that

Ugh why did he drink the whole damn bottle of liquid luck? He was supposed to save it for Ginny and the trio!

On the other hand, Harry being high and cocky af is the best thing!

“How on earth did you get out of the castle?” “Through the front door”

“Harry!” “Sir!”

Aww Hagrid bby don’t cry #ProtectHagrid2k17

Wow Slughorn and Hagrid are so fucking drunk.

Hey at least they included the fish story! That was super cute and feels destroying. Damn this scene tugs at my heart strings.

WHY WOULD A FORBIDDEN SUBJECT BE FOR HYPOTHETICAL USE???? (I mean unless you’re writing a book, but that doesn’t apply here) I love Slughorn and think he’s an interesting character, but fuck he’s so dense

YES THEY ACTUALLY EXPLAINED THAT THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENT ISN’T ON THE MAP. They should’ve included it on the DVD! This would’ve made Ron’s line about Mione saying that in DHpt2 make so much more sense. Ugh this movie has so many plot holes it physically hurts

“Has it ever crossed your brilliant mind that I don’t want to do this anymore?” For once I agree with Snape. Dumbles is a manipulative asshole.

Okay, so in the books when Sumbles and Harry get to the cliff they swim across the sea or ocean or whatever to get to the cave. And I guess they skipped that part, but still had it happen? So how tf did they swim across it here? The water is way too strong? Apparition maybe?

THAT BOAT LOOKS HEAVY. Why make Harry pull it out all by himself?! You’re a wizard, Dumbledick! Use magic!

Dumbledore yelling that it’s his fault breaks my heart now that I know the context. Like, yeah, he’s an asshole, but poor guy. It’s so tragic.

“Don’t worry, sir. We’re almost there.” “I’m not worried, Harry. I’m with you.” Oh the fucking irony.

The added choir scene is so haunting

NO DRACO DON’T DO IT DON’T LET THEM IN

The way Snape walked in gave me GOOSEBUMPS. And “Severus...please.” UGH MY HEART

Nooooo! Hagrid’s cabin! What about Fang?!

So Harry just walked in Dumbledore’s office and ARE THOSE LEMON DROPS ON DUMBLEDORE’S DESK??? FTW!

Ugh I hate how Ron’s in the background for most of the last scene. He’s a part of the trio too!

Aww Fawkes don’t make me cry! Great now I’m emotional.

So overall HBP is my least favorite movie adaption because of how sloppy it is. But damn that ending scene got to me.

I’ve had loads of fun doing these. I guess I’ll both DH movies tomorrow and then OotP on Monday. Later!

#harry potter and the birthday weekend #freeform #half blood prince #golden trio era #harry potter

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