#it’s like. lizzie voice: i’m so much smarter than everyone else here (<- is also dumb)

[cuterrguy]

yeah yeah, jimmy and scar are idiots and it’s a miracle they’re still alive on the same team, but nobody talks about lizzie. jimmy and scar are dumb sure, but lizzie has such a specific type of stupidity that works so well with thing 1 and thing 2 that’s it’s amazing to think they haven’t teamed before. lizzie fools a lot of people into thinking she’s competent with her aloofness but she is easily on the same level as scar and jimmy and i love it.

it’s like being in a circus. just cause you might not be a clown doesn’t mean you’re not still part of the show

(ɪɴ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ sʜᴀᴘᴇ ᴏʀ ғᴏʀᴍ ɪs ᴛʜɪs ᴀ ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴀɪɴᴛ/ɪɴsᴜʟᴛ ᴛᴏ ʟɪᴢᴢɪᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɪғ ᴜ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢ ᴛʜɪs ᴛᴏ ɪɴsᴜʟᴛ ʜᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴇᴀᴛ ᴅɪʀᴛ)

[sharffffff]

Ugh. His head still hurt from Gem sinking her sword into it, dealing a killing blow that likely wouldn’t be killing if it wasn’t for all the damage he took from his zombies. That was stupid.

“What was I even thinking? Going up against an army alone just because my gear is good and I have a stack of zombie eggs? That was stupid.” Joel got up from the bed, only to find himself at Etho’s bed shrine. Right. He forgot he set his spawn here. Awkward. And he was surrounded from all sides by the rest of survivors, who were a lot more successful in, well, surviving.

“Oh, hey guys, just gonna leave.” He quickly started moving away, hoping he wouldn’t attract much attention from these guys, as he was almost giggling by now from both the embarrassment, and, well…

“You’re right, that was stupid. And embarrassing. If it were me in your place, I simply would not die like that. And if I did, I would kill all these guys when I respawned.” Lizzie was leaning in on his shoulder, bloodlust but also laughter sparkling in her eyes as she was mocking her husband.

“Didn’t you die by forgetting to put on a pumpkin? Lizzie, you live in a pumpkin, that’s way more embarrassing than me trying to fight off the herd on my own! And I am still alive and you’re dead, so it’s clear that you’re the stupid one here. Okay, sorry, you’re not stupid, you’re lovely.” Joel stumbled in his words as he basically sprinted down the hill, almost scared that Lizzie would try to take control and make him attack everyone again. He wasn’t sure he could actually survive attacking the survivors.

“That’s right, I’m lovely, and you should listen to what I say because I’m smarter and wiser than you. And I say you should kill Scott. And everyone else for that matter. But Scott first. If it wasn’t for him, I wouldn’t even need a pumpkin in the first place!” Joel could feel bloodlust radiating from Lizzie and, heck, why not, he wanted to indulge it. He was red now. He can murder whoever he wants, especially with the boogeyman curse going around. And murdering Scott is always a time well spent.

“Yeah, I like what you’re saying, Lizzie. Let’s go find and murder Scott, for everything he’s done to both of us. And then murder everyone else, just like you said!” His eyes shone red, and, as he finally got to the bottom of the hill, he sprinted towards other boogeys with a maniacal laughter, ready to wreak havoc on this server, since it desperately needed it.

————————————————

Still standing near the bed shrine, Cleo overheard most of Joel’s conversation with himself. He sounded cheerful, but there was a deep, underlying sadness to his voice, as he spoke to the nothingness of the night. From what they could hear, he was speaking to Lizzie, and had Cleo not known that he already failed his task, they would’ve almost assumed it was the same deal as Tango had with Torchy. But no, it wasn’t his task, it was him talking to his dead wife as if she was still here. As if they were bantering about life, about death and everything in between.

Cleo almost felt like they intruded, but Joel was not quiet in his conversation, and if it’s his way to cope with grief… Well, Cleo can’t do anything about this. Everyone grieves in their own way.

[darkdevasofdestruction]

Don’t Let Go ~ Alfie Solomons

I’m in love with one man and one man alone. Mum and dad love Alfie too, but they still can’t take him away from me ;;;

How did she end up like this, she wondered? They were family...Even though her last name was not legally “Shelby”, she was still a part of the family since she was born. The parents were best friends, and when her parents died, Polly took her in. And then, they grew up together - Same home, same beds, same food, same clothes...Same everything.

And then, war came, and while true, she was younger than even John - Not by much, only about 3 years - But that didn’t seem to bother either of the Shelby siblings, and she was especially close with Arthur and Ada, mostly because they were the ones with the warmest hearts, and could understand her gentle one as well..

However, Tommy was the smartest of the family, and Polly taught her enough about Gypsy street-smarts, so the three of them together somehow became the true heads of the family, the true backbone that kept everyone straight and together.

When war came, she was barely 16, and yet, she joined them, dressing as a man and pretending to be a volunteer physician, healing and running around the battlefield, only to end up helping them dig up tunnels and plant explosions...

And taking a bullet for Tommy.

And nearly dying.

But at least, by the time they returned home, 4 years later, she was called an honorary Shelby and Polly officially adopted her.

She wasn’t Y/N L/N anymore, she was Y/N Shelby, and she was damn proud of that.

She helped with fixing races, rode around with her gorgeous black mare, going to the Garrison with her brothers to make sure they don’t end up drunk, in a ditch, she helped the strategy against the Lee family, got beaten up by Sabini, beat him up right back, got in that whorehouse of a Russian noble family, let the Duchess touch her while in her underwear, got beaten up by the priest, had to blow up a train with good people and many more...

But nothing was bringing her down, because she was a Shelby, and she was strong - Mentally, Physically, Emotionally - And she wanted to make sure the family was together, or at least trying to hang on, somehow.

She was the perfect woman - Never drank, never smoked, never cursed, never did drugs, never did drugs, never dated anyone... 

But when one day, Thomas took her on a meeting at Alfie’s place... Boy of boy, was that entertaining.

She always appreciated Thomas’s ambition, cunning and intelligence...But Alfie?  Alfie was something else. Something much above him, no much smarter, so much better at scheming...And at everything, really. And she was attracted by him like moths to the light.

Back and forth talks, interesting insights on life, learning words in foreign languages that she didn’t know, but he did, and likewise, teaching her foreign stuff, talking to him about books and many other things...

And it was weird, but it almost seemed like she didn’t want to leave that place any time soon, but Thomas needed her for business, so what could she do, really?

And she agreed...And agreed...And agreed...

Until one day, when all things went completely upside down and...Sure, she did her job, and she was supposed to return to Alfie’s to have a chat with him and Tommy... And she did...

As soon as she stepped inside the “Bakery”, she saw Ollie, whose eyes widened in shock seeing her in that state.

“Miss Shelby, what happened?! Let me call the physician-...I’ll go inform Alfie-...” Ollie stumbled over his words, only to have her grab his sleeve and pull him back. “Don’t tell them I’m here. With the way I look, better make it a surprise. Tommy’s here, right?” she asked, slamming the doors open, walking inside, the clicks of her small heeled boots resounding all over the place. “B-But Miss Shelby, we have to treat you - “ Y/N simply shot him a glare, before continuing in a straight line.  “Ain’t a Shelby anymore.” she muttered, and soon, she reached the middle of the wide business room, as Alfie was sitting at his desk and Tommy was pacing.  “Y/N...Finally, you’ve arrived. What happened to you?!” Thomas asked, rushing to her side, only for her to push him away. “You lied to me, Thomas. You lied to me. You promised I wouldn’t get hurt. That you were gonna make sure they wouldn’t touch me. That I was gonna come back perfectly unharmed, not even a strand of hair touched. Only business talks. How do you think that went?” the girl looked down, her hands deep in her bloodied, yet incredibly fancy and silhouette-fitting high-waisted pants.  “What exactly happened with the Sabini meeting, Y/N? And why are you covered in blood?!” he asked, frowning. “It’s fine, not ALL of it is MY blood, thanks for worrying, THOMAS!” but as she rasped out his name, she started coughing up some blood, and as her side started burning in pain, she lifted her already disheveled shirt, applying pressure with her hand where she got shot to keep herself from bleeding out. “Well...This one is.” she used her sleeve to wipe her face, completely non-chalant. “Y/N...Tell me what happened...Please...” Thomas’s voice went lower, almost as a soothing whisper, but it was quickly obliterated by Y/N’s exaggerated, yet pained laugh. “I got beaten up, raped and shot by Sabini and his men. That’s what happened, Thomas. No business talk, just abuse. You promised nothing will happen to me...But, oh, damn, remember that you told Lizzie the same too, and she, that fucker raped her at the Derby too, when you were too busy fucking around with two other women? Oh, wait...Is it because I’m a woman? Because, the way I see it, all women that you have in your life get abused somehow...By you. Grace died because of you. Ada left the city because of you. May got hurt because of you. Esme hates you...There’s also the Duchess, but she very much outsmarted you, so she’s safe and...Still a noble woman. And don’t even get me started on Polly...Poor woman...Having to endure living in the same world as you. For the amount of time you spend fucking women, one would think you’d be more considerate of them.” her beautiful eyes were sharp and hateful, throwing daggers at the man in front of her as she continued to pace around, her tongue speaking the poison that very much tainted her heart over the past many years of her life. “...Y/N. I know you’re in pain, and that I’ve hurt you. I know. You are right, I agree. I’m aware. But it wasn’t my fault. I couldn’t have known, and-” as he continued, the girl calmly approached him, and as soon as she was right in front of him, she back-slapped him, thanking her classy mind for wearing lots of rings that day. As she laughed at the way the wounds showed up on one side of his face, she followed by slapping him on the other side, much harder than before. “Shut the fuck up, Thomas Shelby. Don’t speak to me. Don’t get close to me. I am not a Shelby anymore, so you can fuck off...Do you see who you’re doing business with, Alfie? A guy who can’t even protect his family! He got all of us arrested and almost hanged, made Ada go away, made Polly go insane, had Arthur beaten up, me as well, and guess what, Michael got shot and JOHN GOT KILLED! BECAUSE OF YOU, THOMAS! Grace died because of YOU! And your child got kidnapped and almost died BECAUSE! OF! YOU!” with each sentence, she punched him, hit him, kicked him, smashed him head with her knee, then on the wall, then ended by stomping her boot on his stomach...And walked away, as calmly as if never happened. “And...This is not my blood.”  “Well, lass, gotta say, yeah, you ain’t as much of an angel as I thought, eh. Or, maybe now more than ever, you’re the angel I thought you were.” Alfie watched from behind the desk, completely relaxed, analysing the show in front of him, and yet, his brain was running a thousand miles per second, thinking of millions of things. “D’you have a free spot here, Alfie? No guns and death and all that. Maybe...Someone to patch up your boys. I don’t know. Hell, I’ll even accept being your secretary or...Flower girl. Cook. Tea girl. I can walk Cyril...I don’t know, anything you want, just get me the hell out of this Shelby hell.” she turned around to look at him, using her other sleeve to clean her face, using the water from her tears. “Heard that, Thomas Shelby? Your sister’s deserted you, and for a good reason, eh. You can leave now, there’s other times to do business, right.” Alfie spoke, getting up and stepping towards her. “This isn’t over, Y/N. We’ll talk again. You’re a valuable part of the family, and you’re coming back, sooner than later.” Thomas went get get out of the building, only for the girl to quickly take out the gun from her jacket and cock it, pointing it at the man. “Fuck off and go to hell, Thomas.” she pulled the trigger... “Stop it, lass, don’t do it! You’re gonna regret it!” Alfie sprung out, holding one of his arms around her body, while his other hand went to her gun, making her shoot a wall instead of a living being, letting the man get out of there, still alive, somehow. “Damn it, Alfie! Why’d you do that! It’s 2 for 0, damn it! I’m fed up with taking bullets to save that guy, while all he does is sit comfortably behind his desk, damn it! I’m not a fucking rag doll that can be tossed in the trash!” she cried, trying to struggle out of his grasp, but the wounds were hurting her too much, so her strength gave out faster and she stood limp in his arms, trembling softly. “S’okay now, lass, yeah. I’ll bring ya to Cyril and we can...Uh...Drink that tea you like, right. Forget that guy, let’s get ya treated, right. Get that bullet out of ya. And sure, y’can be my physician, I know you were a great one in war, yeah.” the Jew gently took out the gun from her hand, throwing it to the ground for Ollie to take later, an he picked her up with much, bringing her to the medic’s room. “I need vodka, cigarettes, and if I’m brave enough some Tokyo...Snow...Whatever you call it.” she groaned as soon as she was place on the bed, as the gangster frowned in confusion at her. “I thought you didn’t do vices.” he sat on the opposite bed, watching her intently. “Woaw, I lied to you and everyone else in the world. I do drink and I do smoke and I did date before...Just...Not when people were seeing me. People think you’re an angel, they will hopefully leave you the hell alone. Difficult being a woman these days, as you can see. Everybody’s treating you like a piece of garbage. And bring me that vodka, I need to have the room spinning before I take out the bullet...And vodka’s the best disinfectant. The hospital stuff is washed up and diluted a lot of times.” she gave him a sarcastic half-smile, taking the cigarette he just lit up and puffed on it. “Only whiskey and rum, if you want, yeah. You don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not around here, lass. Just do what you want, nobody’s gonna say a thing, right, and if they do, you know how to use a gun, so shoot their brains, eh, show them all who’s in charge.” he got up, bringing her what she requested, watching attentively as she let her head back, poofing smoke into the air. “Thanks, Alfie. Come back in an hour. I don’t need witnesses of my misery. You know better than everyone, Captain Solomons, that taking out a bullet gets messy.” she pointed the cigarette at him, smirking miserably at him, knowing very well that she wasn’t mentally ready for the procedure. “Well, lass, if you’re very sure, you don’t need help, right, then I’ll be waiting outside.” the Jew patted her head, leaving the room, letting behind only a graveyard silence, that for some reason, creeped the girl out big time. “...Let’s fuck shit up, then...” she muttered to herself, letting the ashes of the cigarette fall pitifully on the bed, as she took a deep breath and violently slammed her hand over the medical tools.

She’s always been a very careful and precise person, and whenever she did this on someone else, she would have people keep the victim down, so she could rummage through their bodies with relative ease, especially after they got shit faced drunk...And maybe with some anaesthesis... But this is the worst. Just like back then, during the war...

Letting a few tears of anticipation fall down her face, she cut a bit deeper into her body, to allow her fingers, previously washed with alcohol, she whimpered and squealed as she searched around for the bullet - It was no easy feat for, but it had to be done, no matter the searing pain -.

It felt like time stopped completely before the extraction of the stupid lead thing, she held it in her hand, watching its taunting gleam glaring back into her eyes, then watched with horror that stupid bottle of whiskey, and with her last strength, she snatched it and putting her pillow over her face to keep the shrieking from leaving the room, and gritting her teeth, she let the alcohol pour out from the bottle, wailing loudly, and yet, hoping nobody would hear her.

She was still sobbing in the pillow, the fire-like pain, electrifying the surging, diffuse pain throughout her whole torso, and she laid there, throwing away that pillow as soon as the door was opened again, and adjusting her head, she noticed Solomons walking in the room, a basket dangling from his arms.

“What’cha got there?” she asked in a weak, whisper-like voice, still trying to recover. “Goodies. Freshly baked cookies. At least something that smells nice in this pigstry, eh.” Alfie’s joking way of speaking seemed to take away her mind, but she smiled apologetically, lifting her hands briefly. “Sorry, too much blood on my hands. Literally and metaphorically speaking.” she explained, only to have Alfie take out one of the cookies and feeding her. “...This...Is the best thing I’ve eaten in my life. Did you make them? Because if you did, you’re like...A Cookie God. Have more?” she asked, managing, with a lot of difficulty, pain and his help, to get in a sitting position. “Well, I’ve never been called a God, right, but it ain’t that bad, yeah. Here you go, one more. I’ll ask a maid to draw a bath for you, yeah, I doubt you wanna stay all bloody the whole day, eh.” he helped her eat another cookie, and weirdly enough, despite all the blood on her face, her small smile was oddly charming. “...Y’know...If you ever want to retire from this gangster bullshit...You could settle down and...Just bake for a living...No, rather, a hobby. I’m sure you have enough money for a life time, so might as well just rest and take it easy. Move away from here...Maybe another country...Or another city, at least...And just...Y’know...Be happy. You could do that...And be rid of stupid Italians and Americans and all these jerks.” Y/N spoke, more or less not directly to him, but in a way, she was projecting her own hopes and dreams. “Margate.” Alfie muttered, sitting down in front of her. “Margate?” she furrowed her brows in confusion, leaning forward a bit. “Aye. By the seaside. The sand is really soft, they say, and the waves are nice, yeah. Very calm town.” he continued, which made her gasp softly in realisation. “You...You DID think about retirement! It means you’re really kinda fed up with this...This mess. I like where this is going.” she smiled softly at him, nodding in agreement. “I think you’re making the right choice, if it makes for anything.” “Y’know, lass, you’re not wrong. We do need a vacation, yeah, and a very long one at that, right. Now, how ‘bout we talk about what you need, right, for this medical thing.  You’re a sensible woman, yeah, so, I trust you more with the details and organising.” he pointed, and thus, they started chatting idly about the medical issues, and even more, about life in general - Books, the pictures, concerts, travelling and things...Leisure things, just simple things that she never had the privilege to talk about, and she had no idea she wanted, nor needed.

Many weeks passed and things were unusually calm for her, and for the first time in her life, she felt...Happy. She enjoyed being around Alfie, working with him without being involved in all the killing, and she absolutely loved baking things together, and he was so charismatic and charming, always giving witty remarks that amused her and made her laugh...

It was the perfect life she always dreamt of having, and he even asked if she wanted to go to a jazz pub with him, and...She got to dress up, and do her make up and do her hair, wear pretty, expensive jewellery, and a damn fine dress to show off her gorgeous silhouette, and high heels to match...And she walked next to him, her arm hooked to his, as they enjoyed the beautiful jazz music and each other’s presence.

It was a blissful dream, and she swore that if anyone dared wake her up, she was gonna kill them, and it won’t be quick, nor painless.

“Y’know, Alfie...You’re the best man I’ve ever met in my life. And that says a lot, considering how many men I had the misfortune of meeting...Including my family.” she raised her champagne glass slightly to clink with his. “Maybe you haven’t met the right men, dear, yeah, y’know, and men in Birmingham are fucking shit anyway. Camden’s better, yeah.” the man chuckled mirthfully, leaning back on his chair. “You...Mentioned Margate once. How are things going on with that?” Y/N asked, smiling at him softly. “Well, lass, y’know, yeah, things are...Things are fine. But, uh...You see...The doctor said I’m sick. They aren’t really sure yet what’s wrong with me, alright, but they said the results should be given pretty soon, yeah.” he admitted after a few seconds of consideration, which made the girl gasp in shock, moving her chair to look at him better taking his hands in hers and leaning forward. “What did they say about it? Did they take blood sampled? Wanna do blood work? Or...Biochemistry tests? Or something more complex?” Y/N bit her lip, looking concerned like never before. “Don’t worry, lass, even if I die, yeah, I’ll still make sure you get paid for your hard work, alright?” the man tried to brush it off, but the indignant look on her face made him chuckle. “I’m gonna kill you if you imply something like that again. I don’t need your money, I just want you to be healthy and alright, got it? Now come on, tell me, what do they suspect. Also, where is your doctor’s clinic, and when will your results arrive.” she pressed on, waiting for an answer. “Come on, don’t be so serious, yeah, enjoy the show, it’s not every night we get to have fun, right?” Alfie, again, tried to play it off as nothing important, but the look on her face made him sigh and nod, giving in. “They think’s cancer, right. I got a tumour, they’re checking if it’s...Uh...Cancer or not. right. Doctor’s around here in Camden, results come out sometime in a week or two, that enough?” he rolled his eyes, and yet, he was grateful for her worrying. “...I guess. If I knew, I would have done the lab work myself, but, you know...If anything, I can do the procedure myself... Or maybe I should hold your hand and make sure you’re not scared. They have to do general anaesthesia, cut you open and all that...It won’t be fun.” she looked down a bit, before smiling encouragingly at him. “Y/N. I’m a big boy now, right, I’ll be fine, no need to worry about me, yeah, you just...You be okay, and relax, and-...And before long, we’ll go to Margate together.”  he continued, trying to calm her down, without realising at first of the commitment, until he noticed the excited gleam in her eyes. “Alfie...? Are you...Are you sure...? Margate is the place you want to go to...Why would you...Me...?” she muttered, almost unsure of how to react. “Let’s go home, eh. I want to make you some nice tea, yeah, and some cookies. I have to tell ya something, and I’d rather it not be out.” 

Alfie squeezed her hands, helping her get up, and the walk home was filled with anticipation and a comfortable silence that wanted to rip out the answers out of his throat.

He let her dress in more comfortable clothes, and so he did, then went down to prepare some nice and warm tea, with the biscuits he baked that day, and went to her room.

“Do you like me, Alfie?” she asked in a shushed voice, not daring to raise her head to look at him. “What’s not to like, lass? You’re smart and witty, and for some reason, you find me funny, and look at ya, you’re gorgeous, right. So if I say, yeah, I want you to come to Margate with me, I mean it. You just have to agree, aye. Get away from this and rest. God knows we need this.” he had a sweet smile on his face - A smile that quickly faltered when he saw stray tears falling down her face, and he started worrying. “Why...In the world...Would someone as amazing as you...Like me? Alfie, you’re...You’re amazing, and me, I’m...I’m the worst. I can’t let go of the past, and I’ve got like...This...This devil inside me...This Shelby devil that keeps whispering in my ear, saying that I’ll never be happy, and that I’ll...I’ll kill again, and I’ll be dragged back to that slum and...And all that happiness will just shatter and...And I don’t deserve you.” she looked down, hoping her long her would hide her face, but next thing she knows, she got brought into a tight embrace, and he stroked her hair, his chin on top of her head, waiting for her to calm down, and yet, he could feel her trembling softly. “Don’t say things like that, yeah, that’s not true. You’re with me, not with them anymore, right, so, then, you’re going back. I won’t let them take you back, if you don’t want to, aye. No need to cry, right, I’ll protect you from anyone who dares try to take you away, eh, even if it’s Tommy Shelby himself, so no need to cry, yeah, Y/N?” he spoke, only to feel her cling even tighter to the back of his shirt. “I...I’ve...I’ve never felt like this before, Alfie. You make me feel so warm...And safe...And happy...I’ve been hold before, but all I felt was repulsion and fright...I was panicked and I wanted to run away...But this...This never happened. And I think I love you, Alfie. Don’t let go of me, please.” her voice was barely audible, but Alfie could feel the raw emotions, so he laid down with her on the bed, holding her dearly. “It will be fine, Y/N, okay. None of these worries will come to you again when in Margate. You and I will be happy, away from here, yeah, so, know that I love you, and let’s wait just a bit more, so we can get rid of this Changretta mess, and we’re leaving, eh.” 

And it was true - From that night on, they slept in the same room, holding each other dearly, reassured that the next day, things will still be as good as the previous night. One morning, however, Alfie woke up without her in his arms, and he panicked, thinking the worst - Poor Ollie thought he was going to get killed - But it was all fine, as she returned with the biggest grin on her face, jumping in Alfie’s arms, not allowing him the chance to say a word, only shocking him. And she held his hands and dragged him to his room, getting him to sit on the bed, and at first, she wanted to make tea, but then she shook her head and brought a bottle of the best whiskey, poured it in the glasses and had him drink.

“Damn it, lassie, don’t fucking scare me like that, yeah, like, at least tell me in advance if you’re gonna leave, okay, I thought those fuckers got ya for good. What the hell was the urgency?” he asked, drinking the glass in one go before looking at her. “I...Well...Haha, sorry ‘bout that, I’m just...I’m sure super happy. So, as you know, today the doctors had to mail you the test results, so, you know, I seem to have been a bit too eager to find out, so I since there were no trains, I walked all the way to your doctor, told him this and that, then got the first train back, and here I am. Oh, and, obviously, I’m super happy ‘cause like, I couldn’t keep myself - Sorry ‘bout that, by the way - So I ripped the envelope and looked at the results. And, uh, yeah, so, I’m happy ‘cause - Look ! - No cancer! You’re completely, 100% cancer free! And, like, the tumor completely benign, no invasiveness, no metastasis, so this is completely curable by surgical removal, and it won’t affect your life span, nor will it, in any way, alter your health. Et, voila, here we are! Go on, drink, cheer, be happy, I know I am!” she laughed gleefully, watching the shocked spark in Alfie’s eyes as he took out his glasses to read over the annoyingly complicated medical stuff, but he was a smart guy, and he understood everything there is to it. “You’re the best, shiksa. You say things are gonna turn out bad, but here, look, they aren’t, and hey won’t right, ‘cause clearly, there’s something up there, alright, that’s looking out for us, and it ain’t only me making sure you’re fine. I’m happy, Y/N, and in less than a month, aye, we’re fucking away from here. Just the two of us...And Ollie as a butler, if ya want. And we can get as many dogs as you want. We can do whatever we want, really.” he hugged her tightly, cupping her face and kissing her tenderly.

It all went sweet and soft at first, and it got hotter and hotter, with much more passion than before, and one thing led to another, and their first night of overflowing love gave hope for a better future, one that will ensure their happiness and that won’t involve them in this stupid gangster war anymore.

Just him, her and Cyril, maybe Ollie too, at the side...What better life to have than this?

But just one week before they had to leave, as they were still preparing for their grand exit, Y/N was walking towards the clinic room to check on the few patients she had left, only to notice the glint of guns, and she did a turn around, looking for Alfie, and yet, Ollie stopped her in her tracks as soon as she saw her, rushing to hide her from the people who were, apparently, having a meeting with Alfie.

“Ollie, it’s an emergency. Life or death, I promise. I NEED to speak to him. Who is he having a meeting with?” she asked, holding her clipboard close to her chest, looking left and right carefully. “With the Sabinis. Now, come on, Y/N, whatever it is, can wait. I’m sure you can wait a bit with Cyril. Please.” Ollie pleaded with her, but she only started writing rapidly on her clipboard, letting the first two pages filled with obvious, typewriter-written pages about standard medical procedures. “I’m sorry, Ollie, but this is bigger than even Sabini. Come with me and NEVER leave Alfie alone with those sharks, got it?” she gave him a sharp look before rushing to the usual place Alfie had business meetings, and as she completely ignored the villains, she slammed the clipboard on his desk, giving him a look. “Very important medical business thing, I need your signature after you read through these.” as he was so much taller than her, she only needed to bend a bit to talk into his ear, carefully flipping the first two pages, only to reveal big, messy writing.

ENEMIES WITH GUNS IN THE MEDICAL WARD POINTED TO THE BOYS DON’T TRUST THEM

Alfie gave her a look, knowing shit went bad, he nodded slightly, getting a pen and, as his signature, he wrote “TELL OLLIE”, and ushered her to leave.  And so she did, and Ollie went to alert the other guys so they could ambush the enemies in the medical ward, all while cursing herself and preparing guns, hidden in her long trench coat, then returned to stay by Alfie’s side, her hands placed on his shoulders reassuringly.

“Mr. Solomons, I see the little song bird likes flying around to every powerful gangster family. Wonder if she’ll go to the Changrettas when she’s done with you.” the Sabini leader smirked at her, and Alfie could feel her nails digging into his flesh, and not even the good way this time. “Listen, listen, Mr. Sabini,eh. You come here, begging me for fucking favours, right, and then, you dare fucking speak ill of my partner, yeah? So, where is the fucking time where you, like, do something to make me want to do that fucking favour of yours, if the only fucking thing you make me want to do is to fucking grant you the favour of putting you out of this miserable fucking life, right?” there was no clearer indicator that Alfie was angry than when he cursed like his beard was on fire, and true, YN found it very weird, considering how sweet and gentle he’s always been with her, but she could feel the protective aura he gave off, and she never felt safer than now. “Aye, aye, Alfie, don’t overreact, please, it was just a merely innocent joke! Lighten up, let’s discuss business. We teamed up with Luca Changretta, we can give you money and exposure. We can sell your rum and weapons all over Europe, especially France and Italy, and that means, in the long run, a ton of money. I’m sure you’ll agree with me, won’t you?” Sabini spoke, and from the corner of her eye, she could see one of the men taking out a gun from the back of his pants. “Mr. Sabini, I will have to ask you, as Mr. Solomons’s secretary, not to take out any weapons, otherwise our men will shoot all of you, with no discrimination.” Y/N threatened in a low voice, taking her hands from Alfie’s shoulders, and crossed her arms to her chest, ready to draw her weapons at any second. “It’s alright, Y/N, right, I don’t think Mr. Sabini is fucking stupid enough to dare a shoot out in my own fucking warehouse, eh.” Alfie warned the Italian gangster, snapping his fingers for Ollie to come by. “Vaffanculo...Che stronza! No, fine, fine, we’re all calm, all good, right? We can have a business deal and leave this place happy, both parts, right?” Sabini spoke, using his hands to gesture everyone to calm down. “Stick that deal up your ass.” Alfie cursed Sabini in perfect Italian, making Sabini straighten up, almost as if he got sobered by a hammer to his head, and without a second to wait, some of the lackeys drew their guns.

But they were too late, for Y/N already had both guns out and killed most of them, starting with Sabini himself, and Ollie’s boys helped up just enough to have the Red Sea at their feet.

Once all the enemies were laying dead on the cold, wet ground, Y/N sighed, throwing the guns to the ground, sighing and staring at the carnage with the eyes of a dead fish.

Alfie nodded to himself, pissed off at the mess that just had to happen, a week before they were going to sail to a better place, without either of them having to bloody their hands anymore, just like now.

“Well, Ollie’s got them all, so we’re good now. The sooner we finish the preparations, the better. Let’s hope Changretta the Bitch gets blown up...I should go check on Cyril, I’m sure he got scared by the gunshots.” Y/N sighed, patting him on the shoulder before turning on her heels to leave, and yet, Alfie motioned to Ollie to clear the mess, and then followed her back to their room, watching her cuddle with the beautiful dog. “Are you alright, Y/N?” Alfie asked, sitting on the edge of the bed, his hand reaching to stroke her hair, only for Cyril to reach to get his head pet instead. “Aw, Cyril...You’re the cutest baby ever. And...I will be, Alfie. I will be. Soon...Once we leave, I will be. Until then, I’m happy spending my time with you and Cyril. It relaxes me...And it makes me happy. WE are happy.” she reached out her hand, holding his, intertwining their fingers together and leading him to lay on his side, with the dog between them, like they were a family. “Well, darling, it’s just a few days longer, and we’re out of here, right. And we’ll be a family, like you want, and by the shore, there’re no more gunshots, right, so, we can learn how to swim, and we can mess with this slobbery bastard, and I can teach you how to bake other things. I heard the waves and the salty air help you sleep better. Ain’t that just fucking perfect, eh?” Alfie gave her a sweet smile, and laid there, with her, relaxing. “Sounds amazing, Alfie. I can’t wait for Margate, then. Just you, and me, and Cyril...And maybe Ollie too, y’know, that guy makes the best tea, ain’t gonna lie.” she giggled, squeezing his hand lovingly. “Aye, it’s gonna be great. And, we can travel wherever you want, whenever you want. Any country, any city, any date. You pick, we go. Sounds good?” Alfie asked, smiling tenderly at her excitement, happy that she wasn’t stuck on the previous blood bath. “Yeah, it sounds perfect. As long as we’re together, everything is better.”

[runlikethemotherfuckingriver]

Ok AU fanfic time where after killing Bane Gregor had to face Ripred

Bit of backstory:

Gregor didn’t suffer the chest wound in the battle, but both Ares and Bane died. Still swamped with grief, Gregor’s currently lying down clutching Ares’ claw. Also I couldn’t think of any good political reasons for Ripred’s betrayal so I just threw in 1 statement and left it at that.

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Part 1

He didn’t know how long he lay there. Holding on to the last lifeline he had left, trying to pull Ares back from wherever he was. His sword had pierced the Banes stomach, but the foul stench that surrounded the three bodies seemed insignificant. Everything seemed insignificant. There was nothing left for Gregor... no reason for him to still be alive. It just didn’t make any fucking sense. The phropech was fulfilled, the bane’s blood had been spilled. What was left?

He stayed there for what felt like an eon, but couldn’t have been more than an hour. Slowly, he became aware of his name being shouted. But what were they expecting him to do? Get up? Go back to Regalia? Still full of shock and pain and grief, he began to rise. The voice came nearer, until he could hear the raspy, deep voice of one animal he didn’t want to talk to. “Gregor”, said Ripred, keeping his distance but sounding more understanding than he ever had before. “Gregor, we need to go back”.

“Back where?” He demanded, with his back still facing the Gnawer, surprising himself with the forcefulness of his tone. “Back to Regalia? Back to the overland? No, Ripred, what we need to do is go back in fucking time, so that none of this shit ever happened. So that everyone we love is sti-“ Gregor’s voice finally cracked with pain, and shock. “still alive.”

The rat said nothing, merely inched slightly closer to Gregor.

“My sisters?”, he asked, unable to muster anything more

“Both still have light, they flew back with Nike. Oh, and that crawler.”

For some reason, Gregor felt immense relief learning of Temp’s survival. He sank back to his knees, clutched Ares’ claw tighter, then finally

Let

Him

Go

He turned towards Ripred. “I’m ready.”

He started to walk towards the rat, intending to climb onto his back, but as soon as he got in reach the rat’s tail caught him and sent him crashing towards the side of the cave.

Part 2

Gregor hit the rocks with a sickening crunch, and immediately felt a couple of ribs break. His first thought was that another rat had creeped in, but Ripred stalking towards him quickly remedied that.

“What the hell, dude? What are you doing?”, Gregor yelled at the Gnawer. Not bothering to reply, Ripred lashed his tail or once again, but as Gregor launched himself out of the way, he felt the rager sensation kicking in. It probably wouldn’t save him from whatever Ripred was doing, but at least it gave him a sense of power.

Gregor just had time to crawl out of the way when the tail spun again, catching his back and pushing him into Ares’ corpse. Blood and fur filled his mouth. Ashamed at the revulsion that filled him, his panting showed him the image of his sword, still buried deep in the Bane’s heart. He grabbed it, spun around and narrowly avoided a strike from Ripreds left arm, claws poised to tear his chests. They both retreated from one another, then began circling. Ripred looked relaxed, amused almost, whilst Gregor was on high alert for an attack.

“Why?”, Gregor managed to get out through the pain in his chest.

“What did you think would happen after this war, overlander? That we’d all go back to peace, no conflict between the species?” Ripred hissed back at him.

“Pretty much, yeah” Gregor replied, and sprung forward, swinging his sword over his head towards Ripreds skull. The rat, however, anticipated this move and slunk lazily to the right, leaving Gregor to impale his sword in the dirt. He barely had time to wrench it out before Ripred came at him, teeth and claws and all. He parried strike after strike, but the Gnawer started pushing him back. Eventually something brushed against his back, and he knew he was backed up against the Bane’s body. Gregor planned to jump up over the corpse the next chance he got, but the floor was slippy with Ares’ and the white rat’s blood, and when he stepped on a piece of flesh, his feet went out from under him and he found himself on the floor, Ripred’s tail holding him in place as he opened his jaws for Gregors throat...

Part 3

Gregor knew at that point that it was finally time for him to go, for the prophecy to be finished, but his ragged breaths felt movement above him, and Twirltongue’s headless body slipped off her boulder pile and onto Ripred’s back, stunning him. Gregor used the split second of confusion to escape from underneath the tail, and took advantage of the disorientated rat to aim his sword at the Ripred’s neck joint. Once again, however, the gnawer easily sidestepped Gregor’s attack, clutched the weapon in his fangs, and snapped Sandwhich’s legendary sword in too. Without anything else to do, Gregor ran.

He could hear Ripred’s laugh behind him, the mocking tone that seemed to convey all of Gregor’s current fears. He knew the rat was faster, stronger and smarter than he was. But he wasn’t trying to outrun him. When he reached the end of the plateau, his idea was confirmed. The rock fell down into an huge abyss, and at the bottom were the bodies of countless gnawers, fliers and humans. Except, they weren’t exactly bodies... which is where Gregors plan kicked in. He knew the fall wouldn’t kill Ripred, but he hoped what lay at the bottom would. First, though, he had get the rat off the cliff. Plastering a layer of fear on his face (Which wasn’t very hard, considering the circumstances) he turned around, just to find himself face to face with Ripred’s crimson eyes. Eye, actually. It seemed someone - or something - had clawed it out during the battle. It wouldn’t affect the gnawer’s ability to see, he mainly used echolocation for that, but Gregor hoped that it was at least hurting him. Ripred’s was panting heavily, his disgusting breath being blown into Gregor’s face. They stood pile that, facing each other down, for a few seconds, until Gregor did something neither of them expected. He grabbed hold of the rats ears and pulled himself up onto Ripred’s back, kicking his remaining eye in the process. Half blinded, the gnawer couldn’t reach up to pull Gregor off, so he started to spin. As Gregor soon found out, that technique also works in attacking anyone within the circle. He was soon finding it hard to hold on, especially since the only option was to grab chunks of fur, but after spotting a jutting out rock, he knew exactly what to do. On the next circle, he shot his leg out and let it trail behind him until it hit the rock at full speed, and broke with a deafening crack.

Just before it hit, Gregor wrapped his arms around Ripred’s throat, and held on as hard as possible. The force of the leg hitting the rock did exactly what he expected; it stopped the rat in his tracks. Unfortunately, it also snapped his tibia, the bone just above his ankle. Just before he went flying off the rat’s back, Gregor caught a glimpse of shiny red bone coming out through his skin, and a torn muscle providing a clear look into the inside of his leg. He hit the ground with a thud, breaking a few more ribs. His whole body burned with agony, but this was the only chance he would get to kill Ripred. The rat was still recovering from his spin, but teetering dangerously close to the edge of the cliff. With as much strength as he could muster, Gregor launched himself forward with his right leg and slammed into the big rat’s body, pushing him off the plateau. The rat fell without a sound, but the force of him hitting the floor created a thunderous crunch. Gregor slowly pulled himself over to the edge, and looked down. As expected, Ripred was still alive. As he peered down, the rat looked up at him. Even from this distance, Gregor understood exactly what the rat was conveying. It reminded him of the first time he’d looked into Ripred’s eyes, and of the knowledge and danger lay within there. This look was similar, except for the insanity that also lived there this time. Soon, the rat got to his feet, but as he started to crawl over to a cliff in order to climb back up, Gregor noticed a swarm of blackness that rose up from a few hundred metres away. He wanted to look away, but he owed it to the rat to look upon Ripred as he finally met his death. The swarm of mites completely encased the rat, and eventually he met the same fate as Pandora. He didn’t even have time to scream. Gregor took one final look at his skeleton, one carcass among many, then began to crawl his way back towards Ares.

It took him an hour to reach the bodies of the Bane, Ares and Twirltongue. He collapsed right next to his bond, the black bat’s beautiful wings torn and ripped. Without looking at Ares’ throat, Twirltongue’s head or his own leg, Gregor clasped Ares’ claw in his hand, and finally lay down to rest...

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Ok from here same thing kinda happens, shiners find him and take him back, Lizzie is devastated that Ripred is dead, so he never tells her about his betrayal etc. The treaty happens, but Lapblood stands in for the rats instead, and her level-headedness leads the other species to continue to delegate her after Lizzie’s idea. Gregor doesn’t tell many people about the truth, only a couple of Underlanders really know what happened (Vikus, Luxa, Howard, Aurora, Nike, Euripides, Lapblood and Temp) Everything after that is the same.

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Phew what did you think? I quite enjoyed writing that.

(Now plz give me notes)