#it’s just aughhh so interesting to me. i rly hope i’ve been portraying it well | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

simcardiac-arrested · 1 year ago

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im a bit catastrophic autism level about characters having missing memories that they cant reach but know are meant to be there, i have a dnd character in a really similar situation!! i just love the feelings of frustration and horror... which memories and thoughts can you even trust? if memories can be removed can they be added?? what do you really know??? its the best for real poor ns

I KNOWWWW I FUCKING LOVE THAT CONCEPT SO MUCH!!!!! just that feeling of something being out of your reach. something you Know but can’t Remember. i love how i put it: like walking into a mall in the middle of the weekend and seeing that it’s empty. because you know it should be full of people. you know what should be there. but there’s nothing. no matter how much you look, there’s nothing, there’s nobody. it’s frustrating and horrifying and and (explodes in autism)

#YOU. ME. SHAKING HANDS #SERIOUSLY LOVE THE CONCEPT SO BADLY #i really wanted that specific feeling of being so traumatized by something. but you cant fully remember what it is #you Know something awful has happened to you. you have a sort of vague idea of what it might be. you even have a suspicion of who might’ve #done it because when you look at them you feel . bad. because the body remembers #but you can’t fully remember what exactly happened or why or who did it. all you have are those weird fleeting moments that you can’t fully #make sense of. puzzle pieces that don’t quite fit #i thought it might be interesting for an iterator considering they are both organic *and* a machine! logically if they were just a fully #inorganic machine then they wouldn’t be able to tell that something has even happened. they’d just be repogrammed and forget and that’s it.#but i really wanted to consider that aspect of the *body* remembering. of iterators being semi-organic. How would that entire removing #memories process feel when you’re still aware and conscious and *alive*? do u get what im saying #it’s just aughhh so interesting to me. i rly hope i’ve been portraying it well #cramswering

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