#it’s in the clip where she’s with Ed and sipping her drink — i posted that too yesterday

[evermoredeluxe]

“Oh, it’s so cute, I love it!” Taylor complementing a fan’s jacket 🥰 (x)

[ihavethedreamies]

Stupid | Wooyoung

Jung Wooyoung - ATEEZ)

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~10.3k

Pairing: Wooyoung x AFAB!Reader

Genre: Reader-Insert, Actual Plot, Fluff, Angst, Smut, Friends-to-Lovers, Comfort

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Caution: The angst in this story is more familial based. There are mentions of adultery/infidelity, but it's not dwelled on. This could be triggering for those who have had parent's leave or other similar circumstances, so just be warned.

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Pet Names (Princess, Sweetheart, Sunshine, etc.), Childhood/Teenage Trauma, Family Issues, Tears and Crying, Swearing, Unrequited Love, Kind of a Love Triangle, Kissing, Dirty Talk, Oral (F! Receiving), Fingering, Multiple Orgasms, Marking/Hickeys/Scratches, Couch Sex, Shower Sex, Unprotected Sex (Use a condom! Reader is on the pill)

Author's Note: Hm, just thought I would do this since I made something similar for San.

(S/N) is for the name of your sister.

Move Update: We are headed out next Monday for our new state (back to where I was born actually) and I'm gonna have to live at my uncles for a month before the new house is ready, so I will be writing a lot there, so get ready.

I am cross-posting this on Archive and Wattpad. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other sites. Happy reading!

The only sound you could hear was your own aggressive keypresses. You had paused your music to go to the bathroom and didn't bother hitting play again. Staring hard at the screen, your eyes hurt even with the dark theme applied. The colorful lines of code on the dark screen blurred and refocused, and you blinked, trying to force your eyes not to blur. Sighing, you pushed back from your desk, rubbing over your eyes. Taking your computer glasses off, you let them fall onto your desk and you got back up. It was really hard to work at 2 am, let alone when your thoughts were racing. And the thoughts had nothing to do with your job. The last thing you needed the day before a project was due was to loop on irrational thoughts. Your socked feet thumbed on the wood floor of your hallway as you went down it. Your sister's door was propped open, so you quietly opened the door, peeking inside. The soft teal lighting strip lining her walls cast a faint glow over the room. She was starfish-ed on the bed, peacefully and messily asleep. Huffing, you stepped out and shut your door. How nice it must be to be thirteen. Pulling your phone from the pocket of your sweatpants, you exited the hallway and went into the kitchen. The large open room of the apartment included the kitchen as well as dining and living areas. A spare room was in the back corner, empty since your friend had moved out a month before. Another room sat across from it, the large windows of the studio covered with tall curtains, but you knew it was just full of boxes of old things. Someday you would have the courage to go through them and get rid of stuff, maybe use the studio for an office or something, but…

Opening the fridge to get the pitcher of orange juice, the door shut, and your eyes focused on the dark on the picture magnetically attached to the front. The picture was of a once happy life you lived. A black squiggle covered the face of the man, the woman next to him smiling like the sun. Glaring at the censored face, you yanked the photograph from the magnet clip and slapped the picture down on the counter. The pitcher followed and as you grabbed a glass, you plucked the scissors from the small utensil-filled mug on the counter. After pouring yourself a drink, and taking a few sips, you grabbed the photo. Holding it up, you realized it would make sense to turn the overhead light of the range hood to see better, but you continued in the dark. Opening the shears, you cut a tiny slit into the white border of the photo and halted. The little line split the man's pants from the shoulder of the little girl's white sundress; she was no more than four. She was sitting on the lap of a girl looking much the same, just about twelve years older. It was weird to see such a bright smile on your face.

The purple-handed scissors clattered onto the Formica counter; the photo still held in the crook of the blades. Resting against the counter behind you, you drank the juice in gulps, hissing through your teeth when it was gone like it was some kind of liquor. The glass-mimicking plastic cup clanked into the sink, and you left the kitchen to shuffle back to your room. As you reentered, you yanked the zipper down of your hoodie, nearly tearing the garment off and throwing it harshly onto the floor. You let the door click quietly closed despite wanting to slam it and went back to your computer. Your chair let out a puff of air when you plopped down into it, the remaining pieces of the candy necklace you had on bouncing over your collarbone. Crunching on one of the sugary beads, you flipped your phone over, so the screen faced up, tapping the black surface and a small white notification bubble showed itself under the white numbers of the clock; 2:13 am. Unlocking the phone with your finger print, you opened your message app and you sniffed at the message in annoyance.

🦊WooWoo🦊: did you get it done?

He had sent it nearly an hour prior. You glared at your computer screen, then to the second monitor, the program running over and over, glitching at the same time stamp each time.

☀️: not even close 🦊: why are you up young lady ☀️: why are you?

He didn't reply right away so you looked back at your computer, clicking your tongue. Hitting save and closing the window, you instead opened up a new email and sent one to your coworker that it might not get there by tomorrow night but that you would try. It wasn't a hard deadline anyway. You worked for an Indie label, not some AAA, so that gave you some flexibility. Closing the window, you stared at your background for a good few minutes, waiting for Wooyoung to reply. The picture used to make you smile, but it hurt your heart. San's cute dimple smile, and his arm around you made you wince. Wooyoung was on your other side, his cheek pressed into the side of your head as he hugged you. You were leaning into San, trying to escape the other man's embrace, at least that was your excuse. The picture was getting close to five years old.

🦊: games 🦊: why are you up ☀️: working. thinking 🦊: about? ☀️: how shit I feel 🦊: you sick??

You rolled your eyes; he wasn't super intuitive sometimes. It was almost 2:30 in the morning though.

☀️: no. how shitty my life is now compared to back then…

Once again, he took a bit to reply, and you almost got up to use the restroom then go to bed. Your phone then buzzed on the desk, the noise even louder going through the wood, and you grabbed it quickly, answering the call.

"Your life isn't shitty (Y/N). I'm here, huh?" His giggle was forced. You just huffed, getting out of your desk chair to move to your bed.

"Livin' the dream."

"What's it this time? Your…da- uh, male life giver?" His little catch at least made the corner of your mouth crook up.

"Yeah."

"How's (S/N)?"

"Good, I guess. She…she was a bit too really remember either of them."

"Even if she doesn't it can't be easy with…how it all played out." He was trying to be careful with what he said, but you were already in a bad mood.

"Our dad cheating, leaving us for his second family and then my mother…" You thought tears who come to your eyes, but maybe you were too tired.

"Where do you think she went?" Your best friend's voice was soft.

"No clue. Neither did Gramma, or the cops. She could be in Timbuk-fucking-tu for all I know."

"Do you want to go out tomorrow with me and San? Or do you have to work?" Before you could answer, your phone buzzed, and you pulled it away from your ear. Opening the email from your coworker, you sighed in relief. Perfect timing.

"Not anymore. The character models are getting scrapped and redone so that means my code has to be scrapped. Might be why I couldn’t get it to move right."

"What about (S/N)?"

"She's thirteen not three. I'll have her sleep over at a friend's maybe…"

"Great! Get some sleep, sunshine. Meet us at 9!" He hung up and you flopped back onto your mattress, feeling disappointed for some reason. Finally working up the energy to get off the bed, you went back to your computer and shut it down, staring at San's smiling face a little too long, before letting it actually turn off.

~*~*~

"Good morning, little lady." You left the hallway, sandals in your hand. Your sister sent you a tired look over her cereal, waving lazily.

"G'mornin'."

"Do any of your friends get to have sleep overs on school nights?" Her eyes opened a bit wider then, then squinted as she thought.

"Uh…probably. Going out with-" she gave a flirty pose, batting her eyelashes, "Sannie?" then dropped the act.

"Shut up, you little shit." You threw a stray cheerio at her, and it nearly stuck to her cheek.

"Wooyoung's going too."

"Oh. You ever gonna tell him?"

"Tell San I like him? I don’t know..."

"San? Oh, yeah, right. Why not?" You didn't answer right away, pouring a glass of juice.

"You're gonna turn into an orange." Your sister rolled her eyes, and you poured just a bit more before putting the pitcher back down.

"I just... I don't think I stand a chance."

"What?! Why?!" Your sister acted like you had personally offended her. Even before your whole messed up parental situation, you two never bickered or anything. Probably because you were nearly thirteen years older than her.

"I'm not his type. He probably sees me as a sister. Also, he looks like that," you motioned down at your white tank with a think blue plaid shirt over and worn denim capris, "and I'm…"

"You better compliment yourself." Your sister glared at you, making you sigh.

"He likes the girls in skirts with makeup and their nails done. The ones that giggle at everything he says and touch his bicep ‘accidentally’…" You drifted off, getting mad at the mental pictures.

"Then do all that." (S/N) shrugged, getting up to put her cereal bowl in the sink.

"Counter." You corrected and she rolled her eyes, taking the bowl out and moving it to the counter.

"(S/N), I don't even own a tube of mascara." You sighed, then proceeded to down your orange juice once again like it was a stiff drink. Your throat burned and your stomach stung somewhat…maybe you did drink too much.

"Use mine."

"What?" You turned fast to look at her and her eyes were wide in panic.

"I only have mascara, I promise!" She lifted her hands in surrender, and you breathed out your nose. She was only a year off being allowed make up, you at least wanted to maintain the rules your mother put on you with your sister. Even if a lot of them never had to be enacted on you.

"Look, I'm just going to go hang out with them and pretend one of my best friends isn't sex on legs."

"I'm pretty sure they both are, but okay." (S/N) muttered under her breath as she passed you to go get her backpack and you pretended to not hear her.

~~~

"Bye, sis!" (S/N) got out of your car and headed into her middle school. She was the one of the few who didn't mind being seen dropped off right in front of the school, but laid-back older sisters are much, much cooler than any parent.

"Just text me who you can stay with!" You called to her, and she turned around with a shocked face.

"Right! What about my bag? My locker's not big enough!" She realized, coming back to your rolled down window, leaning into it.

"I'll bring it by after your club meeting is done."

"Really!? Can you bring WooSan?"

"Don't call them that!" You scolded but laughed nonetheless, "Sure."

"Bye, sis!" She took off again, meeting her similarly uniformed friends by the entrance. You were blessed that the school was willing to take her in for free more-or-less on a scholarship. Your mother wanted both of you to go to the same school, but it was private, and you were in no way capable of paying. If you were, you wouldn't be driving a wine red 2002 Hyundai Sonata with suede upholstery. Pulling out of the drop-off line, you continued down the road till you met the traffic light. It sat at the edge of the academy's campus and the park where you were meeting the guys was just past the light. As you waited for the light to turn, you tapped your fingers on the steering wheel along to the music playing on your radio. The light took even longer because the crossing guard was leading a group of elementary schoolers across. You were watching them pass in their cute little uniforms when you were startled by a knock on your window. You flinched, looking to see what looked to be a high school boy on the other side. You rolled the slightly tinted glass down just enough that you would be able to hear him. He flashed a smoldering smile, and you blatantly sneered.

"What, kid?"

"You obviously don't go to school here, you from the public school?" How dumb was this kid? You hadn't been in high school for seven years. You had a college degree and everything. Most might take it as a compliment to be seen as looking young enough to be a teenager, but…

"Get lost, squirt." You scoffed, looking away but not bothering to roll the window back up. You were a bit curious what his reaction would be.

"I might look young, but I'm a senior this year, princess." He was clearly a little put off by your flat dismissal, trying to keep a flirty tone.

"Fuck off, kid. She's our princess." A familiar voice hit your ears, and you sighed in relief, watching Wooyoung essentially hip bump the kid so hard he fell back onto the sidewalk. Your heart skipped as you huffed a laugh, watching San come up as well and unlocked the doors so the two guys could climb in, right at the light turned green. San barely shut the back door before you took off, leaving the teenager's friends laughing at his sorry state. Crossing the median, you pulled into the parking lot of the park and slumped back into your seat.

"Got your favorite." San leaned forward, toned arm hovering over the center console, holding a plastic bag with one finger.

"Sweet!" You swiped it from him and Wooyoung got out, running around to your side where the window was still rolled down.

"Hey, pretty lady, want to go make out behind the bleachers?" He leaned against the side of your car just like the cocky teen had and you couldn’t help but laugh.

"Uh, no." You wondered if he caught you glance in your rearview mirror to watch San get out of your car, holding the drink holder of ice coffees as well. You couldn't meet his gaze though, and surprisingly, he didn't respond, just stood up and started to follow San down the path.

"Hey, wait up!" You got out quickly, nearly forgetting your phone and to lock the car as you dashed after them. Finally getting half-way around the pond that was trying to be a lake, you sat on a picnic bench of the wooden shelter right on the edge of the water. Some ducks quacked as they lazily swam closer, hoping for a snack. As you took a long sip of your ice coffee, you watched San get up and go closer to the ducks, a little bit of his croissant left. Your eyes couldn't help but travel over the wide expanse of his shoulders and back. His arms were on display since he was in a sleeveless hoodie, and you smiled at his as the ducks happily ate the bread.

"That's bad for them, y'know?" Wooyoung called and the other man tossed him a bored look over his shoulder, then went back to the birds. Because you were too busy eyeing over your friend, you didn't notice Wooyoung watching you. He lifted half of his nose in a sneer, glaring at his friend who was taking up all of your attention. Wooyoung wanted to blame it on that San had started working out since you had all started being friends, but he wasn’t sure that was it.

"Just fucking tell him." He whispered harshly to you and his sudden mutter made you choke. San immediately turned around, and you waved him off, but he still went to your side, patting your back some to help.

"You okay?" He kneeled next to you, and you nodded, flashing a small smile, trying not to get red. Not like you could control it. Just then, something green flew through the air, flying past San's head as he stood, and he was toppled over by a mass of blonde fur.

"Jeremy! Get off of him!" A young woman scolded the golden retriever as it refused to get off of San, sniffing him and licking his face. Why am I jealous of a dog? You sighed, slumping back against the wood railing of the shelter.

"Why don't you tell him?" Wooyoung's next whisper was much softer, he sounded very tired.

"And get rejected? Ruin our friendship? No." You whispered back, still watching the cutest thing you've ever seen. The dog was a fat mood, refusing to get off of San.

"I'm so sorry!" The woman finally managed to pull the dog off of the man and he got up laughing. She immediately blushed, finally able to see San past all of the fluff. Looking away and down the path to where the green flying disk still lay you got up to retrieve it, since the dog had failed its job.

"Here." You forced a smile as you handed it back to her and she snapped out of her daze to take it from you, immediately looking back to San. Luckily, she left not too long after and you were able to continue the day with the two guys.

~*~*~

A week passed, and you still hadn't been able to work because the rest of the team couldn't get their act together and finish their parts. So, you had been left to your thoughts which is never good. You sat on the couch, boredly and only partially watching the TV. Your knees were pulled up to your chest and your hands lazily tapped a rhythm on the worn faux leather of the couch. Tilting your head, it rested on the back of the couch, and you stared at the ceiling of your loft apartment, the large ventilation pipes curving around the support columns high above your head. When the doorbell rang you almost didn't recognize it, thinking it might have been on the show. It happened again and you knew it was yours because the TV now displayed a commercial for some kind of sports drink. Getting up with a groan, you trudged over to the door, socked feet shuffling over the wood floor. When you opened the door, a young woman sat on the other side, and her face made you nervous. She looked…

"Hi. Are you (Y/N)?" She smiled gently and you nodded.

"I'm Jena (L/N). Can…can I come in?" When she said her last name, your heart fell. You knew immediately who she was.

"Sure." Your tone was flat, but since she didn't know you, it seemed she didn't notice. You motioned her in and toward the couch and you glanced around your place. It wasn't messy, but it wasn't nice either. She was in a sundress that was at least $300, and she had a giant rock on her finger. You grimaced as she sat on your very well-worn couch and you sat down as well, facing her by sitting sideways. She put her designer bag down, linking her fingers and resting her hands on her knee, legs crossed.

"I'm sorry to intrude, but…I'm assuming you know Daniel (L/N)?" You never wanted to hear that name again.

"Uh, yeah." You shuffled on the couch, the faux leather creaking under you.

"I'm his daughter. I have to admit I was a little…stalky?" She cringed at herself, smiling sheepishly.

"Dad is…well, he doesn't have much longer." When you didn't really react, she continued. On the inside, you just weren't sure how to react.

"They don't know if he drank too much when he was younger or what, but his liver is failing. He's been on a transplant list, but they can't find anyone compatible." She’d better not have come to get you to give him half of your fucking liver-

"Anyway, I was looking over his will-"

"Where's your mom?"

"Huh?"

"How…what about your mom?"

"Oh, uh." She looked down, a sad expression covering her face.

"When he got sick, she left him, so I'm in charge of everything." Rolling your eyes, you huffed, looking toward the kitchen, focusing on the picture on the fridge you meant to cut up.

"Uh. Right, your name is on the will." She pulled a packet of paper from her purse, showing you where your name was highlighted. You didn't even care what he was leaving you, so you handed it back.

"I don't want it."

"O-oh…if you don't mind me asking, who are you?" You raised an eyebrow, and she wilted under your glare.

"You don't know?"

"No, sorry." She hid bashfully behind the papers, "are we cousins or something?" You just stared at her in shock.

"No offense, but it’s a bit weird to have a niece in your will when you have four kids?"

"Look, if you want my part, have it."

"No! That's not… Actually, the reason I'm really here is-" She pulled something else out of her bag and you recognized it.

"Dad kept saying the name Naomi." You stood up at this and she flinched. You paced a bit, hands going to your head, fingers digging into your scalp. Breathing out slowly, you turn back to her.

"Sorry…keep going, I'm just…struggling with this." She seemed a bit unwilling to continue without asking anything, but she did so as you sat back down. Your ire was evident, you were sure.

"Um…well, I couldn't figure out who she was, so I looked in his yearbook. He's…" She flipped to the middle of the book, "with a girl named Naomi." She showed you the page, but you already knew it. High School Sweethearts read in flowery script over the picture of your parents.

"But when I looked her up, I couldn't find anything." Of course not. You never could.

"So, I used Google's new AI search with this picture, and I found a woman…" You hadn’t gone that far, still not really trusting any kind of program claiming to be AI. She pulled out another paper from her bag and showed it to you. It was an article about some town's mayor on the other side of the country, and the caption listed the woman next to him as his wife. It was your mother. But her name was wrong.

"It says her name is Carry, but that looks like the same woman, right?"

"Y-Yes."

"Maybe they’re sisters? Twins even? I know it’s a long shot, but do you have her contact information? Even if they broke up soon after high school, maybe she would be willing to see him since he's dying…" As soon as you saw her face on the paper, your anger left, and you were holding back tears.

"I don't…but-" you took a shuddering breath, "uh, I don't think she'll go see him."

"Really?" She deflated a bit, and you looked down at your lap, picking at your torn jeans.

"Uh. No. She's… Okay, I'm in the will because I'm your sister. Those are my parents. She’s my mother." This information floored her, her jaw literally dropping. Sniffing hard, you hated crying, let alone in front of essentially a stranger.

"How old are you?" Your question snapped her back, making her flinch.

"T-twenty." Of course.

"Dad…He uh, left us and mom for…you guys. Then mom fucking snapped or broke or whatever and left us too." You looked at the printed off article, at your mother's smiling face next to some man you had never seen or heard of before. This shocked her even further. You gave her the article back and stood moving to the door.

"Uh, take me out of the will or whatever and just leave us alone please. Thank you." You opened your front door, not able to look at her.

"U-us?"

"Ah. (S/N). My thirteen-year-old sister." This must have really made this Jena girl realize why you acted the way you did. It wasn't that your father left your mother then fathered her, he had both families at the same time.

"M-my brother is twelve." Reality was hitting her.

"Great. That sucks for everyone, please leave." You motioned with your arm for her to get out and as soon as she shuffled out into the hallway, you let the door fall closed. Your shoulder hit the wall, and you slumped to the floor, hot tears falling down your cheeks and onto the floor. Your chest heaved as you sobbed, hand covering your mouth to keep you quiet.

"Fuck!" You screamed, grabbing a cheap ceramic bowl you used for change and chucked it across the room. It hit the column behind your TV and shattered, coins clattering onto the floor in its trail. You buried your face in your hands, breathing harshly, trying to prevent yourself from hyperventilating. Your phone buzzed on the coffee table. It buzzed again a few minutes later, then again. Again.

"Damnit." You got up, storming over to your phone, looking at it. It was the group chat, Wooyoung and San were talking about doing something the next day, some kind of lawn game competition at the community college. When they saw that you read the messages and didn't reply, your phone rang with a call from Wooyoung.

"I know that we're not in college anymore, but we can get away-" You had stopped crying more or less, but hearing his voice brought tears back to your eyes and you fought a sob.

"Are you crying? What happened?"

"U-um…" You swallowed hard, a lump rising in your throat along with the tears.

"I'll be there in five…six minutes!" He hung up and you let the device fall onto the couch. Your shoulders fell as you stood in the middle of the main room of your place, glaring at the coffee table's scratched surface. A tear fell onto the plywood, then another. Snapping out of your daze when hard knocks pounded on the door, you only got halfway to the door before he opened it, finding it unlocked.

"(Y/N)?" Seeing the concerned face of your best friend made you feel safe and so your self-erected walls fell. He shut the door as he moved forward, catching you in his arms as you shriveled to the floor. Wooyoung held you tighter as you cried, desperate sobs and whimpers muffled as you pressed your face into his chest. Your tears darkened the red fabric of his sweatshirt, and he adjusted your position, so you sat on the floor, legs over one of his, cheek pressed to his collarbone. A tear of his own fell and mixed with yours on your jaw, but you didn't notice it. He didn't know what happened that wrecked you so bad, but he couldn't stand hearing and seeing you so upset. He even hated it if you cried at a movie.

"What happened, sunshine?" His embrace loosened so you could sit up straighter, tears still falling, but you weren't actively sobbing. Wooyoung cupped your cheek in his hand, wiping a tear from your eye. You had to take several deep breaths through the story, but you managed to tell him what happened.

"M-my mother's alive, Wooyoung." Your voice had quieted so much at the end that, but he still heard the pain.

"(Y/N), sweetheart, come here." He stood, helping you get up and he led you over to the couch. He grabbed your phone, and you rested back on the couch as he easily put in your pin without having to ask what it was. You listened half-heartedly as he called your sister, most likely just getting out of class, about to go to her art club meeting.

"Again? Is this going to be weekly? I think I can stay with Amanda, maybe Emily…" You heard (S/N) sigh, "what about my stuff?"

"Can't you manage with borrowing?" Wooyoung cast you a glance, your forearm over your eyes.

"I guess. What’s wrong with (Y/N)?"

"She's just really struggling with something."

“What?���

“Adult stuff.”

“Okay, yeah, sure, uh-huh.”

“She’ll tell you when she’s ready, little lady.”

"You better take good care of her Mr. Jung."

"I will Miss (L/N)." He hung up and put your phone back down. You felt the couch shift when he stood up, then felt his body heat as he kneeled on the floor next to you. Wooyoung gently removed your arm from your face, and you turned to look at him.

"Oh, sweetheart." He sighed, hand going to your cheek, rubbing his thumb over the red skin of your cheek, brushing away a stray tear.

"C-can you call San? And we can watch a movie? Get Indian food?" You weren't sure how to read Wooyoung's expression. He seemed to be thinking, but then he forced a smile and nodded.

"Sure, princess." Wooyoung stood and pressed a long kiss to your forehead, and you blamed your turbulent emotions on your racing heart.

~*~*~

About two weeks later, you found yourself sitting on the couch, staring at the number you plugged into your phone. You hadn't pressed call yet, the non-local area code of the number glaring at you. It was a long shot, but you hoped calling the mayor's office might get you somewhere. You had been stalling for a long time, his office would only be open for another hour thanks to the time difference. Your sister was getting annoyed with you having her stay the night at a friend’s place, but luckily, she had a slumber party she was invited to. The sun was starting to set, and you finally worked up the courage to hit call, then turned it onto speaker, at 5:57. It was probably around 3 there.

"Mayor Elledge's office, this is Peg."

"Hi, uh, Peg. I'm…I'm trying to get in contact with Carry Elledge, but I'm not sure how to get ahold of her…" The silence scared you, worried that the woman would be too suspicious to help you.

"May I ask who you are?"

"I'm…a relative. It's about…my father's will." Please work.

"I see…I can get you her cellphone number." The secretary relented and you sighed in relief, thanking her several times. Typing the number she gave you into your notes app, you politely end the conversation and went to call the other number while you still had the courage to do so. Ring. Ring. Ring-

"Hello, this is Carry?" It was your mom, no doubt. Tears welled in your eyes, and you swallowed, voice coming out softer than normal to keep from crying.

"M-mom? It's me. It's (Y/N)." More silence.

"I think you might have the wrong number, dear." You felt your face fall, your eyebrows furrowing, your lips trembling.

"This isn't Naomi (L/N)?"

"No, dear, sorry." There wasn't any kind of recognition in her voice, but it was hers.

"O-oh…okay, sorry." The call ended and you pressed your lips hard together, jaw clenched. What the hell happened? You sat trying to wrap your head around everything, about thirty minutes passed and your phone rang. It was a different number, but it was the same area code as the other two.

"H-hello?"

"Are you the young woman looking for Naomi (L/N)?" A man spoke, and you wondered if it wasn't the mayor guy.

"Yessir."

"You must be (Y/N)."

"What the hell happened to my mother?" Your tone didn't have nearly as much malice as you had wanted. Even if this guy did nothing wrong, you hated him. He sighed. He explained that he found her near death in an alleyway. She had malnutrition and was dehydrated. He got her to the hospital, she was in a medically induced coma for a few days, and when she woke up…she didn't remember anything.

"So, she has no idea about her past life?"

"No, miss."

"Thank you for…not letting her die."

"I'm sorry to not be of more help Miss (Y/N). Though, I don't think it’s good for her to be reminded of her past life. I called because she is…having a panic attack. Maybe it was your voice, some part of her recognized it maybe? It’s clear she is traumatized from her past. I think it would be best if you leave her be." You didn't want to. You wanted to get in your car, grab your sister, and drive for the three of four days you needed, and get your mother. But…she wasn't your mother anymore, even if she did remember you, it was clear her brain was hiding you and your sister.

"I…Okay. If you want to know, Daniel (L/N) is dying."

"Good."

"Yes."

"I appreciate you wanting to reach out, but I would like you to lose our numbers.

"Yessir." He hung up. Your body must have run out of tears along with your energy because you just slumped back into the couch. Something rose in you then, something bold. Grabbing your bag, phone and keys, you left your place, heading for Wooyoung and San’s.

~~~

As you rode the elevator to the third floor, you were shaking. Whether it was nerves or pure exhaustion you weren't sure. Going down the hall, you heard voices further down and you finally saw the owners as you turned the corner. San was standing at his apartment door, some bleach blonde girl wedged between him and the door. You weren’t sure how to feel, your emotions were too turbulent. Somehow it felt like your heart finally completely shattered, but you also were relieved, but the latter made you mad. You turned and fled before you could see his lips actually meet hers.

~~~

"(Y/N)?" You heard your name through the door, then Wooyoung's rapid knocks. You were slumped against the island counter, hands stinging and bleeding, shards of glass and ceramic scattered around the room. Tissue paper and packing peanuts were strewn about the main room of the apartment as well, old papers and books torn and discarded. Splinters of wood from broken frames and dismembered toys littered the floor as well, and you ran your thumb over a glass paper weight shaped like a cat.

"(Y/N)?!" Wooyoung jiggled the door handle harder, but it was locked. A red smear followed your thumb on the glass cat, the cuts on your palms still oozing blood.

"Damnit, (Y/N) (L/N)! Open the fucking door, I know you're in there." He was panicking, you could hear it in his voice.

"Fuck off." You sighed, throwing the glass piece as hard as you could, and it hit the far wall. The ear chipped off and broke, the finish over the brick wall flaked off, then it clattered to the floor.

"(Y/N), please princess, let me in." You heard a thump, presumably his forehead hitting the door. You licked your lips, the salt of your tears hitting along with the iron tang of blood. You weren't sure if it was from where you had bitten your lip or the cut on the tip of your nose.

"(Y/N). Please, I need to see you, sweet girl. Please let me know if you're okay." You didn't know what time it was, just that it was late, only the light of the storage room flowing into the room from the door. Your phone had been going off, and you hated the message you saw on it, so you chucked it across the room as well, breaking it instantly. The place was a mess, and you were grateful your sister wasn't home to see your breakdown.

"Go away, Wooyoung." Your voice was hoarse after your crying, but the door was thin, and you knew he heard.

"Not a fucking chance, (Y/N)."

"Just…just let me be alone."

"No! Open the door, damn it!"

"Go home."

"Shit. (Y/N) open the freaking door or I'm coming up the fire escape!" You knew he meant it. You got up, not bothering to be careful of what you stepped on, only wincing slightly as a speck of glass wedged in your foot, joining other scrapes and cuts already present. Shakily, you undid the door chain, and he must have heard you turn the deadbolt and the lock on the knob, because he opened the door before you could. He gasped, looking at your face, pale but red from smeared blood of the small cuts on your face. He looked at your hands too, and the bloody footprints on the floor.

"Oh my God, (Y/N)." Wooyoung shut the door, dropping his backpack and cupping your face with his hands. They were cold from being out in the early autumn night and you didn't even react when he did so. Wooyoung lifted your head so you could look at him and his brow furrowed in despair at the blank look in your eyes. Finally, he looked around the room in the low light, shocked at the carnage.

"I called her." You managed to get out and he looked back at you, confused.

"Mom. I looked up the mayor guy's office number and called. She didn't… She didn't know who I was. Her husband called and told me she had some kind of amnesia after he found her. Then he told me never to try again. So, I…" you licked your lips, "then I…I decided and went to your place. San was taking some blonde bitch into the apartment." Your breath shuddered and his shoulders slumped.

"(Y/N)-"

"I…I went to the store, but they were out of Cayman Jacks. The Indian place down the street closed early. The pizza place was out of white sauce… I grabbed some random food from the convenience store and then when I got home… I got a text from that Jena girl, my half-sister," you spat, "dad's dead."

"(Y/N), sunshine, you must… What can I do?" He stepped closer, one hand leaving your face to grab your hand. You flinched at the sting, and he held your hand up to see the cuts in the skin. It looked like you had a few splinters as well.

"Help me clean this mess?"

"I’ll just do it, lets get you cleaned up first."

He picked a few splinters out of your hands and feet, then sent you off to shower. Wooyoung vowed to work on the mess more later, maybe even get Seonghwa to help, but he dealt with the dangerous stuff first. He had shoved and/or swept all the debris into a big pile in the ravaged storage room, leaving the mess for another time. After carefully picking up all the sharp shards and splintered wood, he vacuumed to make sure everything was picked up. He glanced up when you shuffled out of the hallway, a towel draped over your wet hair, a soft light-weight grey sweater draped over your torso, and a darker gray pair of shorts nearly hidden by the shirt. Your head was bowed, hands and feet red and he shuffled over to lead you to the couch.

"Did you use soap?"

"Mm. Conditioner stung." You sat, and he pulled your hands into his lap so he could look them over.

"I'll help you with these." He let your hands go and then his own went to the towel on your head, gently rubbing it over your hair, then scrunching the strands with the fabric to get more of the water out. Gently he laid it around your neck and shoulders to the still damp strands didn't drip on your shirt. When Wooyoung returned with your first aid box from the bathroom, you were still sitting in the same spot, staring blankly at a spot on the couch. Sighing, he went back to you and neither of you said anything as he smeared ointment on the cuts. He went ahead and just wrapped some bandages around your right hand since it was so cut up, but put band aids on the other. Wooyoung did the same with your feet, and you didn't even flinch even though you were usually ticklish there. As he finished some other little tidying things, you ran your finger over the chipped nails of your opposite hand, the polish flaking and cracked as well even though (S/N) only painted them two days prior.

"(Y/N), look at me." He prompted and when you didn't, he gently lifted your head with his finger under your chin.

"I'm so sorry, princess, that your…about your mom. And your father. But with San-"

"It was a stupid thought. I don't know why I got the courage to go." You tried to look away, but he forced you back to look at him, thumbs stroking your cleaned face. The little cuts had already pretty much closed, and he leaned forward and pressed a small kiss on the scratch on the tip of your nose.

"It's not stupid, (Y/N). Neither are you, he is." You huffed a wry laugh, but he shook his head.

"No, he is. He's a fucking idiot. You wanna know why?"

"Yeah, why?" You pulled both of your legs up under you, leaning with your side into the back of couch, head resting on the back cushion.

"Any many who wouldn't fall in love with you after knowing you is an idiot. I think I'm the only smart person there is." Wooyoung shook his head, throwing the band-aid wrappers onto the coffee table. It took your tired brain a bit to process what he said, but you still barely had the energy to snap your head up to look at him.

"What?"

"You've looked at him like he hung the moon for like two years but you’re still like a sister to him or something. Fucking stupid."

"You love me?"

"Yes! And you're an idiot for not noticing. That's why I'm the only smart one." He stood up to actually throw the wrappers away, using the task to flee since he was flushed from his confession. He stood looking down into the nearly full trash for a few seconds, trying to think of what to do next. Before he could turn back to you, he felt your arms wrap around his middle from behind, your cheek pressing to his back. He wasn't very tall, one of the shortest in your friend group, but you were small compared to him. Normally your hugs had a great deal of strength in them, like you did as a whole, but while they were around him, they were shaky.

"I'm sorry for being an idiot, Wooyoung." Your voice was quiet, he felt it vibrate through him more than actually hearing it with his ears. He sighed.

"Its…its fine. You can't help how you feel any more than I can." He laid his hand over your arm, gently prying you off of him, but pulling you back into him once he turned around. Resting back against the island, you went with him, letting him hold you close. His fingers ran through the drying strands of your hair, and you shuffled even closer when he pressed a kiss to your forehead.

"I…My brain is too frazzled to give you a response right now, Woo. I…I want to tell you-“

"It’s fine, (Y/N). I wasn't expecting anything back…"

"No, its…I can't put my emotions together right now, but I might like you back, but it could just be my subconscious looking for comfort."

"Can I help? We can talk it out? What do you want me to do?"

"What do I want…?"

"Anything." You pulled back to look at him, looking over his face. He was so freaking pretty, his longer black hair was pulled half-up, a few strands framing his face. The ends of the little strands brushed over the beauty mark under his eye and your eyes flitted to the small one he had on his lip. You bet most people didn't even know it was there. Bringing your left hand up, your sleeve fell so it was no longer hanging by your fingers, and your index finger ran over the small dot. You flinched when he quickly grabbed your wrist, a little tighter than it maybe should have been. He realized this and loosened, sliding his thumb up to your palm.

"(Y/N). Be careful, sweetheart." With his grip on your wrist, he pulled you closer.

"Anytime you're close to me I want to hold. I want to kiss you. I want to pin you to the nearest surface and…" He licked his lips, brow furrowing, "Don't let me do something you'll regret because you are weak now." You grimaced, looking down, stepping back from him.

"D-don't…" Your breath shuddered and he could tell you were starting to cry again.

"Hey, hey." He pulled you back in for a hug, "I will hold you as long as you want. I can lie on the couch, and you can lie on me. We can sleep there. We'll watch that movie you like so much that your sister hates…" You sniffed, nodding and he kissed the crown of your head before you pulled back, and he led you to the couch. Not even ten minutes later he was stretched across the old couch, you nestled half on top of him, half between him and the back, the intro of The Last Unicorn playing on the TV. You normally didn't use a blanket on the couch, not unless you were upset, so it was tucked under your chin.

"How did you know to come?"

"Huh?"

"Why did you come here?"

"Oh. (S/N) was freaking out because you weren't answering any texts or video calls, and your phone was going straight to voicemail. I texted her that you broke your phone and that she didn't need to come home." Like it felt left out, his phone buzzed, and he shifted to grab it from the coffee table. You sneakily glanced and saw that it was from San.

🐯: where you at??

He just put the phone down, but it buzzed not even a minute later.

🐯: is (Y/N) ok, or do I need to send Becca home and come over?

"You better not fucking come here." Wooyoung huffed quietly, managing to use one hand and reply.

🦊: She's fine now. Leave us alone.

"That's harsh."

"He broke your heart; I should be much worse." He clicked his tongue, picking his phone up when it buzzed again on his stomach.

🐯: wtf you good? Are you mad?

"Yeah, I'm fucking pissed."

"He's calling." You mumbled, looking at his screen while he looked at the TV, trying to think of what to say. He angrily slid at the answer button, having to do it a second time for it to work.

"What?!" He nearly shouted into the phone, his even louder than normal voice sharp in your ear.

"Sorry, sweetheart." Wooyoung brushed over your hair, "What?"

"Woah, dude, are you sure you're okay?"

"What. Do. You. Want?"

"Woo." You scolded, and that seemed to make him even madder.

"Is she okay?!" San must’ve not heard.

"Yes, you stupid- She's fine. What do you want?"

"Can I talk to her?"

"No, you can't."

"What? Why?"

"Just go…hang out or in Becca or whatever-" You smacked his chest and he yiped.

"Did you make her upset; did you guys get into a fight?"

"No-"

"I'm coming over-"

"Damnit, no!"

"I don't see why you fucking care, Choi San." Something snapped in you, your last vestiges of rationale fizzled out. Wooyoung choked around a laugh, quickly putting the call on speaker.

"(Y-Y/N)?" He sounded like a whimpering puppy.

"Why are you trying to stick up for me or defend me?"

"Y-you're…you're like my sister-" Your fingers dug into Wooyoung's shirt so hard you scratched the skin underneath some, and you sat up, grabbing the phone.

"You know why I wasn't okay? Huh? I found out my mom's alive but doesn't remember me or my sister. My dad is dead. I couldn't get my favorite butter chicken, and the guy I like is at his place sucking face with some chick who looks like she can't do basic addition. So, fuck off San." You hung up and slid Wooyoung's phone away, so it landed on the coffee table, sliding just a bit further past where it landed. Huffing, you laid back down onto your other friend and continued to watch the movie. You both tried to focus, but after a few minutes, you both burst into laughter, and it was a good five minutes before you could fully calm down.

"I'm so fucking tired." You rested your hand over your eyes, wedged between Wooyoung and the couch and he turned toward you, blocking your view of the TV.

"Do you feel better though?" He brushed your hair off your face, and you nodded, nestling into the crook of his neck.

"Just sleep, sweetheart." Wooyoung pressed another kiss to your forehead, and you couldn't help but listen.

~~~

You woke up sore, not sure if it was from sleeping on your shitty couch or from the destruction you wrecked on your apartment the night before. Wooyoung was still asleep, curled around you, and still so, so pretty. You assumed he thought that if you waited, you would realize you were just wanting Wooyoung for comfort, not because you liked him back. But, after sleeping on it, you weren't so sure. Before, you really didn't know if you liked him back or not, but as you watched him sleep (feeling a bit creepy honestly) you thought about it. When you first became friends, you had a pretty big crush on him. The closer you got, the more it seemed he got on your nerves, and he was just annoying and immature. But after graduating, you got much closer; he really was your best friend. You were genuinely closer with Wooyoung than San, but you almost always hung out as the three of you. Could you have liked both, but chose San because you didn't want to admit you had liked Wooyoung the entire time you knew him? Did he annoy you so much because you had feelings for him, like some elementary age boy who pulls a girl's hair? And says he hates her? Gently, so as not to wake him, you cupped his jaw with your hands much like had the day prior to you.

"Be careful, sweetheart." He echoed the same words from the day before, not even opening his eyes.

"Why?" His eyes finally opened, the intensity in his gaze taking your breath away. Wooyoung scooted an inch closer, pressing you further into the cushion, his knee wedging between your legs. You gasped when he pressed closer, finally feeling him against you.

"If you let me kiss you, I won't stop there." His lips hovered over yours, tongue flicking out and running over your bottom lip as well as his.

"Then don't."

"(Y/N)-"

"I'm sure, Wooyoung. I thought about it, and yes, I have…had a crush on San. But that's what it is, like a school crush. You were right that I was stupid. I don't love you because you're my best friend, you're my best friend because I love you. I’m in love with you." Normally such flowery words would make you cringe, but yours were genuine. He breathed out hard with his nose, brow furrowing, eyes flitting away from yours, down to your lips.

"That was part of the reason I was so upset last night. Yes, I felt heartbroken from seeing San with that girl, but I also felt horrible, because I wasn't nearly as upset as I thought I would be. I was just glad it wasn't you with some bleach blonde bitch. After I found out about my mother…I was really glad it was you that came over and not San." Wooyoung couldn't hold a giggle back, trying to keep his face serious, but he couldn't.

"And I'm glad my sister called you, that you came." You smiled purely, but his turned to a smirk, the arm not under your head curling around you. You gasped when he slid the last little bit closer, hitching your leg over his hip and grinding his hardening cock into you.

"You have ten second to tell me to get off, otherwise I'm fucking you stupid on this couch." You whimpered at his words, hands leaving his face and resting on his shoulders. You bucked your hips, causing him to let out a soft grunt.

"Stupid, huh?" You smirked back and you squeaked when he rolled on top of you, soft lips capturing your chapped ones. The kiss wasn't gentle, his tongue quickly invading your mouth, tasting every inch of your tongue, his strong thigh hitching hard against your mound. Sneaky hands snuck under the waist band of your shorts, fingers pressing hard into the flesh of your ass, pulling up against him, feeling the outline of his dick against your tummy. Wooyoung pulled back from the kiss, letting you catch your breath, a trail of saliva dripping down your chin. He kneeled over you, pulling his shirt off and chucking it across the room. You whimpered, your own sneaky hands stroking over the skin of his chest and abs, when had he been that built?

"Up." He ordered, and you sat up just enough for him to pull your shirt off, along with your sports bra underneath.

"Fuck!" You twitched as those sinful lips wrapped around your nipple, teeth nibbling the peak before moving to the next, then up. Finally, his trail of kisses stopped at your throat, and he sucked your skin between his teeth there. It was too high to hide, and he worked the skin nearly raw, leaving a large purple welt on your jaw.

"Ah!" You jerked under him when his hand dove under your shorts and panties, two fingers swiping through the slick of your folds.

"You’re already this wet for me, sweetheart?" Wooyoung chuckled in your ear, those two fingers not hesitating to plunge into you. The sudden intrusion took your breath away, the slight burn left your head swimming. He only pumped the digits maybe twice before retracting his hand, and instead shoving his fingers in his own mouth.

"Oh, fuck." He groaned, climbing off of you, then shoving you up the rest of the way on the couch, landing on it with his stomach. Your shorts and panties flew through the air, joining the rest of your clothes and he threw your legs over his shoulders. Your skin felt like it caught fire when his tongue wasted no time in wiggling inside your cunt. It was long and he knew how to work it, his nose brushing your clit as he drank from you like a thirsty dog.

"Woo-Wooyoung, god!" Your breath hitched, legs twitching around his head, that deft tongue leaving your core to circle your clit, those two fingers sinking into your heat once more. He pulled back, licking his lips, spread into a sinful grin.

"You taste so fucking good, sweetheart." He groaned, crooking his fingers up hard, battering your weak spot.

"W-w-wait!" Your orgasm was coming on fast, and his fingers kept up their antics as he laid over you again, nose nuzzling behind your ear.

"Cum for me, princess." He licked over the crest of your ear, and he chucked breathily as your cunt clenched and spasmed around his fingers, their wiggling spurring your orgasm along. You shuddered and heaved as he pulled out, and you flinched when the slick pad of his index finger lowered, swirling over your pucker.

"Huh?" Your back arched from the odd sensation, but he didn't go further than a few teasing brushes.

"Maybe later, I want to taste all of you. And I want to fuck you full of my cum there too." He sank his teeth into your earlobe, and you turned your head to the side submissively, whimpering.

"Oh, you're a good girl, huh?" His teeth scraped along the column of your exposed throat, your head twisting more to give him better access.

"Fuck, you're gonna feel so good on my cock, princess." Wooyoung groaned, scattering kisses over your neck, shoulders and throat as he wiggled to get his pants and boxers off. Hauling you back down the couch, he easily grabbed your thighs to lead you to wrap them around his middle. You sighed feeling the heat of hard cock slide through your folds, head swimming as the fat head prodded your entrance, then slid up.

"Wooyoung, please~!" You whimpered, wanting him to sear through you, craving the burning sting.

"You wanna know something, sunshine?"

"What?" He chuckled at your slightly slurred speech.

"I plan on railing you so hard you don’t even remember who San is." He hummed and you couldn't brace for his entrance, his fat cock filling you with a hard snap of his hips. Your back arched, breath forced out of you, chipped fingernails digging crescents into his back. Your mouth hung open in a silent scream, gummy walls spasming and fluttering around his cock, somehow the pain of him gouging into you threw you over the edge so quickly it made your clit sting too.

"God, fuck, Wooyoung!" You finally caught your breath enough to speak and he groaned long and deep.

"You're so fucking perfect, (Y/N). Oh, sweetheart, you're made for me!" He groaned a laugh, fading into a whine as the clenches faded with your orgasm. You felt like a truck hit you, vision blurry, lower half protesting at Wooyoung's brutal entrance, but you loved it. Your hips jumped again, cunt sucking him in further when he sat up more, pinning on of your knees to your shoulder, holding the other at his waist.

"Look at your cute pussy struggling to take me, huh?" He loved the sight of your tight core weeping around his cock, slick shining along his flesh and both of your inner thighs.

"I'm gonna fuck you so good, sweetheart~" He giggled, and your fingers gouged lines down the skin of his back as he started, pace immediately relentless, battering your cervix with the head of his dick. The hand at your thigh holding it to his side left, sliding down your body and gripping your ass.

"Hm, you like it, pretty girl? Like my fat cock?"

"Fuck, yes, Woo~" Your breath heaved, and you let out a delirious giggle, gasping and whining hard as his rapid pace barreled you through your third orgasm. Your cunt stung, but it was so good. You squealed when his hand left your butt, only to slap the skin hard, the sting travelling up your hip and into your thigh. He felt your walls grip him harder at the spank, so he did it again, harder.

"Oh, shit-" Your head lolled against the couch cushion, face and neck flushed, heaving for air. Your nails clawed down his chest to his stomach and he licked his lips at the sting.

"(Y/N), you're such a good girl, yeah? My good girl~"

"Y-yours!"

"Yes, sweetheart. All mine, oh, you're doing so good."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, princess. This pussy's so good too, welcoming my cock home?"

"Yeah!" You giggled, dumb on his cock and he hadn't even come once yet.

"Aw, love, can I cum inside? You on the pill, yeah? Let me paint you white, huh? Fuck you full of my cum, then flip you over and give you more?" He was laughing every few words, sounding almost a bit delirious himself. He had wanted to have you like that for so long, and he was going to fuck you on every surface in the place if he could.

"P-please!"

"Okay, I'm gonna then-" Wooyoung hummed, it faded to a groan, then with a few more stuttering thrusts, you felt heat blossom in your lower stomach. His cock pulsed as rope after rope of hot jizz filled you, a few drops leaking from where he split you open, leaving a mess on the couch. Your body jerked as his orgasm faded, you almost blacked out from your own. Your clit was throbbing, folds swollen and red, but he was still painfully hard.

~~~

"Hold on here." Wooyoung moved your hands to the mount of the shower head, and you wrapped your fingers around the metal pipe. Your toes curled as he entered you again, hot water hitting his back and dripping off of him onto you. Drops of cum hit the shower floor along with the water and he started to pound into you again. The water made the slaps of the skin of his pelvis against your butt and thighs all the louder, nearly muffling your soft whimpers and mewls. Your ass was red, covered in hand-shaped welts, thighs littered with hickeys and kiss-marks. His back, chest and stomach were covered in scratches, a bite-mark etched into his shoulder and a single hickey clung to his jawline. You weren't sure how long it had been since he first got inside you, but it had to have been hours ago. You had no idea where his stamina had come from, and your once burning cunt had more or less numbed to the sting of overstimulation, tiny orgasms shattering through you without warning or reason. You felt the wet strands of his hair on your shoulders as he leaned over you, hand cupping the underside of your breast, the other over your hands on the shower mount.

"Fuck, (Y/N), I love you. I love you so much." He kissed your shoulder, avoiding a sore-looking mark he had left.

"I-I love you t-t-too, Wooyoung-!" You heaved for air as another tiny climax shivered through you.

"Breathe baby, you gotta pace yourself, I still gotta fuck you stupid.” Wooyoung giggled and you just squeaked and mewled, since he already had.

Master-Master List

ATEEZ Master List

[stanbillyhargrove]

Demons - The Rewrite

Chapter 1: The New Girl

T/W: Brief ED reference.

Tag list is open

I moved to the small town of Hawkins just after my school year ended. When the sun never set and the days were hot and humid. My parents divorce had just finalized and I had left with my mom to live closer to her family.

A new start, she said. But, you see, a mother who was torn between being a workaholic and drinking with her friends in one state is still that same mother in any other state. And my father leaving only made her worse. She couldn't stop, couldn't quit moving for more than a second or else she'd flounder. Mom worked in the hospital so she usually wasn't home much but now, she picked up every extra shift she could get her hands on. Working herself to death and going out with the girls all the time was better in her mind than dealing with anything. Better than being around for me. Not that I needed her anyway. It's better like this, easier for me to hide things. Things like parties or skipped meals, things like the red scabs on my skin.

__

It took two minutes to meet Nancy Wheeler and her boyfriend Steve Harrington. Nancy lived just down the road from my new house and as soon as she'd seen moving trucks she was on her way to introduce herself. She was nice enough, friendly and smiling when she came over, nosey though. Steve was the real reason I continued to talk to Nancy. He seemed more genuine and was easier to be around. He also didn't ask questions that I didn't have answers to.

It took two weeks before I met Billy Hargrove, though by then I'd heard plenty of stories. That he had rolled up from California and let chaos rain down on this sleepy town. That his car was loud and he was louder, immediately drawing everyone's attention. That he looked like a god amongst men, all tanned skin and hard muscle, and that his looks had girls leaving their boyfriends to fawn at his feet.

I had been invited to a party by Nancy and Steve. The first party of the summer. Small towns and bored teens meant a lot of parties, but the first and last of the summer were apparently the biggest.

When the three of us pulled up to the party I stuffed my hands into the pockets of my black jeans and tried to keep up with Nancy’s socializing. A blur of names and faces as she paraded me around. After a while I managed to duck away from her and Steve in search of drinks and found Billy leaning against the open door frame leading from the kitchen to the deck and yard.

As soon as he saw me he smirked around the cigarette hanging from his lips, “well I don't think I’ve ever seen you around here before.” He hummed, eyes scanning from my conversed feet all the way up my legs to my chest-wrapped in an over sized canvas jacket- and finally settling on my face, “I think I’d remember a smoke show such as yourself.”

Blushing, I looked quickly down at the toes of my shoes before meeting his gaze, “I just moved here a couple weeks ago, the name's Cat. You are..?”

Billy licked his lips as he stomped out his cigarette and I couldn’t help but do the same scan over his body. Black combat boots led to skin tight blue jeans which led up to an unbuttoned shirt, sleeves rolled up to show off the muscles he was so proud of, and long curly hair framing piercing blue eyes.

“Billy Hargrove.” He had stepped forwards, looking down at me.

“The infamous Billy Hargrove,” I smiled, "I've heard about you."

His tongue shot out, licking his lips as he smirked, "good things I hope."

"Oh no, terrible things. I heard you came to town and stole everyone's girlfriends. Heard you fought a few guys for their girlfriends too."

He laughed, "don't believe everything you hear."

"Oh yeah? You got a different story for me?"

He smiled and took me under his arm, "come on, let’s find you a drink."

--

I sipped on the too strong drink in my hand, "so it's all bullshit?"

He took a swig of his beer and nodded, a playful smirk on his face, "I did give a couple guys black eyes, but they started it. I can't help it if their girls left them."

I swayed, giggling into my cup, "and the girls? Is your bed post whittled down to a toothpick?"

Billy shook his head, golden curls bouncing, "not quite."

"You did sleep around though," I pointed, gulping my drink.

A shrug of his shoulders, "can you blame me? Not much else to do here."

"Yeah," I puffed, "I hear that.."

A brief silence followed, muffled music from the house filling the night around us. Billy pulled a cigarette from his pocket, flicked his lighter and inhaled deeply.

"What brings you to this hick town anyway?"

I sighed, grabbing for his cigarette and bringing it to my lips. Held the smoke in my lungs until it burned and then blew it up into the sky, watching the cloud disappear.

"Parents split. My mom's parents live here so she packed up and took me with her. New beginnings and all that shit."

Billy blew a puff of air out of his nose and raised his beer can, "to being stuck in this shit hole."

I raised my cup and we gulped down the rest of our drinks.

We sat in the darkened corner of the yard for hours, until the music from the house shut off and the moon hung heavy in the now silent sky.

"I guess that means it's time to go home," I mused, "hope I didn't keep you past curfew."

Billy shrugged and stood up, "dad's always an asshole, me climbing through the window doesn't make a difference."

He held out a hand to help me up and led me around the house to the driveway where his Camaro sat waiting.

"I'll take you home," he offered.

I cocked an eyebrow at him, knowing how much I'd watched him drink as we talked.

"Don't worry, I'm fine to take you home...unless your mom's gunna be pissed, then I could sneak you in through my window," he looked at me, a playful smirk on his face.

"Mom won't care," I murmured, swaying lightly on my feet, "if she's even there."

"Sounds like we've both got winners for parents," he huffed, helping me into the passenger seat of his car.

"What about your mom?" I asked when Billy opened his door to slide into the driver's seat.

He froze for a second, fingers tightening on the wheel and clipped, "she's gone."

"Oh, I-I’m sorry, did she..."

He shook his head and turned the key in the engine, "nah, she just left one day. Said she was going to the store...never came back."

"Oh, Billy, I'm sorry."

Billy's shoulders raised with a quick shrug as he shifted the car into drive, "it's fine...Dad found Susan and Max and we moved out here."

"New beginnings," I mumbled.

"Something like that."

We pulled up to my empty house a while later, the only sign someone lived here being my old, crappy green car sitting in the driveway.

"She's not here," I sighed.

"That your car on the cinder block?"

"That's my steaming pile of garbage on the cinder block," I quipped.

He blew a puff of air out of his nose, a smirk pulling at his lips, "what's wrong with it?"

I shrugged, "dunno, it only runs sometimes. Dad was supposed to fix it up for when I got my license...he never got to it."

"I can look at it for you."

"Oh, you don't have to."

Billy smiled, his face soft when he looked at me, "want to. I get to see you again that way."

My cheeks burned, a grin creeping as I opened the car door. I took a deep breath of the cool air and turned back to him.

"Good night, Billy."

--

I was nursing a headache on the couch when I heard the loud rumble of Billy's car pull into the driveway. Groaning, I rolled off the couch and kneeled on the floor for a moment to let the room stop swimming. A knock on the door had me lurching to my feet and going to the door. I leaned a hand against the door, bracing myself for the afternoon light and winced when Billy started pounding on the door.

"Ssh!" I scolded, opening the door a crack.

My glare was returned by a playful smile, "morning, Sleeping Beauty."

I opened the door a bit more, squinting against the bright sun, "why are you here? And so....alive?"

He chuckled, "I'm not a lightweight and I'm here to look at your car, remember?"

I groaned, tipping my head against the doorframe, "right now?"

Billy threw his head back to laugh and pushed the door open to let himself in, "I'll fix you first."

A couple of aspirin later, I followed Billy outside with a large glass of cold water in one hand and a piece of toast in the other. I hid in the shade of the house, Billy's sunglasses on my face and sipped at my water.

"I didn't realize you were such a lightweight," Billy joked, "we didn't drink that much..did you eat before the party?"

"Yeah."

No.

"Must have just had more than I realized," I shrugged, picking at my toast and tossing crumbs to the ground.

Billy peered at me, "you're supposed to eat it."

I laughed nervously and took a small bite, "I can't eat much when I'm hungover, makes me sick."

A half truth.

"Your dad, he a car guy?" Billy asked, turning to look at me from under the hood of my car.

I scoffed, "not at all. He had this thing parked in the garage for years before I got my license. Found it really cheap...he always wanted a son to fix it up with...got stuck with me instead."

His mouth pulled into a tight line, eyes glancing away from me.

I kept rambling, heart pouring from my lips to the pavement below, "mom caught him cheating when I was little...started secretly taking birth control and staying out more and more. He started staying later at work.. eventually they just stopped trying, stopped talking and started yelling if they had to be together. Separated last year and finalized the divorce as soon as they could. Mom's still never around...I think I remind her too much of him."

He stopped tinkering with my car and slammed the hood down, making me jump, "come on, let's get out of here for a bit."

We slid into worn, baby pink leather booths at the diner in town. A sticky, plastic coated menu was slid between us by a baby faced girl as she batted her lashes at Billy. He didn't even look at her, just pulled a cigarette from his pocket, lit it and took a long drag.

"You want anything?"

I shook my head.

"I'll have the grand slam. Two forks. Coffee and water for both of us," he ordered, lazily flicking his cigarette in the ash tray on the table.

"Uh, oh-okay," the waitress stammered, blushing as she hurried away.

"You always treat waitresses like that? And here I thought you weren't as rude as people said," I asked, an eyebrow cocked.

A smile tugged at the corner of his lip and he leaned in to meet my eyes, "she's been trying to get with me since I got here, can't take no for an answer."

He pulled back and blew out a puff of smoke when the waitress returned with our drinks. She set down the cups and scurried away, keeping her eyes down. I reached for the sweetener, ripped open a couple packets and poured them in my mug. Stirred and took a sip only to scrunch my face at the taste.

Billy laughed across the table, and started dumping cream and sugar into his cup, "yeah, coffee's terrible here. Food is greasy and delicious though."

"You could've warned me," I chided, grabbing for more sweetener.

"And miss your face? No way," he finished emptying an ungodly amount of cream and sugar into his coffee, stirred and took a sip.

We quietly sipped at the bitter coffee until a heaping plate was placed down between us along with a couple forks and a bottle of ketchup. Billy dug in right away, mixing an egg into a pile of oil drenched hashbrowns and pouring ketchup on top before taking a large bite. I looked at the plate, mentally calculating the calories in front of him when my stomach growled loudly.

"I knew you were hungry."

I gulped at my water and shook my head, "I'm okay, really."

He pushed the plate towards me when my stomach rumbled again, "try some, you'll feel better."

I huffed, picked up a fork and stabbed one of the sausages on the plate, dipped it into an egg yolk and stared at it for a second before taking a purposeful bite. I savored the bite, letting the grease fill my senses and before I realized it, I'd devoured a small portion of the plate.

"Feel better now, right?" Billy smiled, "told you I'd fix you."

--

Three days. It took three days for Billy Hargrove to weasel his way into my life. Three days of showing up at my house and working under the hood of my car while I sat off to the side in the shade. Three days of mindless drives and loud music, of easy conversations and small touches.

Three days until Billy showed up later, well into the afternoon and forced a tight smile onto his face when I opened the door. He jerked his head towards his car and spun away, leaving me scrambling to put my shoes on and follow him. I slid into the passenger seat and barely got my seatbelt on before Billy took off down the road. He swerved through Hawkins and turned to follow the highway out of town.

“Are you kidnapping me Billy?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood in the car.

Billy flicked his cigarette out his window and turned to me, a light smile on his face, “you’re not scared are you, Baby?”

I smirked, “being taken by an almost stranger into the forest? Not scary at all."

He chuckled and turned up the music, continuing his drive into the forest. When he pulled into a clearing and parked the car I felt my chest tighten with anxiety.

Why did he bring me out here? What does he want?

@charmed-asylum @alias-b

[soft-baby-dobrik]

fratty and bratty // david dobrik

a/n: so I am so sorry I like never post on here, but I started dating a guy and he's amazing and like actually wants to spend time with me and college has been kicking my ass but I am back, AGAIN! thank you for all the love you have given to me and my page, love you all bunches <3

request: hii i was wondering if u could do a request where david meets the reader (college student) at a frat party or sum after filming her without consent for content?? like at first she’s angry but then they hit it off. your writing is so good!!!

summary: you go to a frat party and are met with the flashing of a camera in your face with a david dobrik behind the camera.

masterlist

requests are open

follow my instagram (david page) <3

Being a college student obviously went along with drinking. Being a female college student meant easier access to said drinking and invites to parties left and right. Partying was not a weekly occurrence for you like some other college students. You actually had tough classes that required studying and time out of class. Somehow, your friends convinced you to come out tonight, even though your week had been hectic and all you wanted was to sleep, for the whole weekend. Yet, here you were, dressed for a party and physically walking into the party. Your friend had a tight grasp on your wrist, making sure you did not sneak out of the crowd or lose you. Once you reached the “bar” where the guys in the frat were handing out drinks, you asked for a beer with a smile. The “bartender” smirked back at you, handing you the beer with a wink.

“A girl drinking a beer is after my heart,” he grinned.

“I’m not drinking it. I’m shotgunning it,” you stated, with a smirk. His eyebrows raised, but before he could respond with something flirtatious, you turned around and left the room. Your friend laughed loudly as she clutched her drink.

“Are you really going to shotgun that?” she asked, sipping her drink.

“Hell yeah,” you laughed, “After I get some shots in me,” you grinned, shimmying your chest. As you headed into another room, you saw the crowd of people clustered into the room. The music was not fully blaring yet, so you were able to talk to some people you recognized. A few girls had a bottle and offered you some sips of it. Graciously, you took the bottle and let it move down your throat. Shot after shot until you felt the effects of the alcohol. Minutes turned into a couple hours and you felt at ease after some beers. Another one was grasped in your hand as the crowd uproared, and you saw David Dobrik and some of his friends enter the party. His camera was held in his hand as they maneuvered through the crowd. On instinct, your teeth sunk into your bottom lip. David Dobrik was obviously a very attractive guy, but in your eyes, he was the most attractive guy. Numerous girls were calling his name and trying to get his attention, so you shrugged them off. In your eyes, there was no way he would pay you any mind. That’s when you thought it was time for another shotgun. Some of the guys near your chorused in their cheers wanting to join. You all pushed through the group and made it to the backyard of the house.

One of your guy friends was pressing the hole into the can when Zane came tumbling out the back door, clearly drunk. Giggling, you waved to him. He grinned and came towards you.

“Do I know you?” he asked, in a nice way. You laughed loudly, while shaking your head no.

“No,” you giggled, “but I know you from youtube.” He warmly smiled in return. “I’m y/n.”

“Well, y/n, let’s get fucked up!” he yelled and in a blur, you were handed your can and a countdown was done. Then, you popped open the can and threw your head back, trying to gulp at the rate of the other guys. Your impossible mission turned out to be a fail. The guys all cheered for you and you laughed, opening your eyes to be met with a flash in your eyes. Squinting, you saw David’s camera pointed towards you. The smile on your face diminished. If he was filming you and it showed up in the vlog, your parents or younger siblings could see.

“Um,” you began, feeling nervous to say something. “I never said you could record me. Hell, you didn’t even introduce yourself,” you spoke up, somewhat loudly. Your friend was hot on your heels when she heard your voice speak up, sensing an issue.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, looking over to you and then the group around you.

“He was recording me and didn’t even ask or say a word to me,” you explained, annoyance and anger boiling in your tone. Your friend looked over to David, not afraid of him just because he was famous.

“I’m sorry,” David began. “I’m David.” He had a smile across his face that made you more annoyed. 

“Wow,” you huffed, shaking your head. By now, mostly everyone had cleared out of the backyard. “So are you going to delete it or?” you snapped back, sassily. Zane “oooh”-ed in the background, laughing loudly. 

“Hey, I’m sorry,” David said, sounding genuine as he came closer. “I’ll delete it now. I just thought it was cool that you were shotgunning with all the guys,” he said, clicking a couple buttons on his camera, showing you that he deleted the clip. “I really did not mean to make you mad.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, a slight flush to your cheeks. “I just have younger siblings and I wouldn’t want my family to see any of that.”

“What’s your name?” he asked, biting back a smile. 

“y/n,” you responded, meekly.

“Well, y/n, you might be the angriest drunk I have ever accidentally recorded,” he laughed. Your jaw dropped slightly, making him laugh. 

“I am not angry!” you exclaimed, only causing him to laugh harder.

“You are slightly angry,” he laughed out, making you purse your lips. He bit his lip, biting back a smile. Internally, you were gushing.

“You shouldn’t record people without their consent,” you grumbled. He laughed, again.

“Well, how can I make this up to you, grumpy,” he smiled.

“French fries,” you stated, smiling happily at the thought of them.

“Right now?” he asked with a smile.

“I mean-” you paused to look around to see your friend off with a guy, watching you with a grin. She nodded in approval, clearly eavesdropping. Nervously, you nodded. 

“Well, I’ll take that as a yes,” he smiled, stretching out his hand for you to take hold of. Nervously, you let your hand fall into his as he enter the house and weaved in and out of the crowds. Once he made it outside the house, you let your hand fall out of his.

“So,” you started as you followed next to him towards his car. He turned to look at you with a smile, watching you somewhat messily walk. “Do you always offer food to people you make angry?” He laughed loudly as he unlocked his car, opening the door for you.

“Not usually,” he said, closing the door and heading to the driver’s side. “Only for the people who are about to choke me out for it,” he teased, pulling out of the spot. 

“I was not!” you exclaimed. 

“If I wouldn't have deleted it, I would be dead on that lawn right now,” he added, keeping his eyes on the road.

“I would not have killed you!” you gawked, turning to look at him. His smile made your heart race. 

“It’s okay, it’s a moment I won't forget,” he said, looking over at you as he pulled into the drive thru. He ordered you a large fry and a large milkshake. Smiling, you took the food and milkshake with a squeal of happiness.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, shyly, as you sipped on your milkshake. You threw your head back in happiness.

“You’re welcome,” he said, pulling into a parking spot. “So,” he started, turning to face you. You were shoveling fries in your mouth, making him smile. “Do you get in cars with strangers who offer you food often?”

“Listen, I am drunk as shit and craving fries, don’t judge,” you mumbled, sipping on your milkshake again.

“So you make poor decisions when you’re drunk?” he grinned, staring at you. Your heart started racing as his eyes stared at you.

“I don’t hookup with guys just cause they’re famous and buy me french fries and a milkshake,” you blurted out, feeling your cheeks heat up as David cackled next to you.

“I was not trying to sleep with you!” he exclaimed in between his laughing fits. Embarrassment was evident in your features. 

“Sorry,” you mumbled, staring down at your drink as you messed around with your straw. “Guys aren’t just nice like this.” A small silence fell between you two. “Plus, you have hooked up with fans before,” you added.

David opened his mouth slightly in surprise, “So you’re a fan?” he asked. You nodded.

“Of course, you guys are super funny to watch,” you shrugged.

“That was from a interview, not a vlog,” he teased, grinning at you.

“Okay, so maybe I’m a fan of you,” you blushed.

“y/n,” David spoke up, making you look up at him. “You’re cute when you’re embarrassed,” he said, smiling. 

“I-” you began, moving your mouth not knowing what to say.

“This is the one time you haven’t had something sassy to say,” he laughed. 

“You’re a jerk,” you mumbled, shaking your head.

“A jerk who just called you cute,” he shot back.

“Well, thank you,” you smiled, shyly, looking up at him through your eyelashes. 

“Do you want a ride back to your house?” he asked, turning to face the driving wheel.

“Jeez, trying to get rid of me already,” you joked, turning to face the front of the car. 

“No, actually I was hoping you would invite me over and that we could watch a movie or something,” he smiled, with a slight tint to his cheeks.

“Well, uh,” you stammered, “Okay, only if I get to pick the movie,” you said, continuing to munch on your fries.

“So, I bought you food and I can’t even pick the movie!” he laughed, handing you his phone to type in your address.

“Yup,” you said, handing him his phone back. He started the drive to your house, shaking his head at you. 

“I’ll allow it, if I can take you out again, preferably when you’re sober, so you won’t kill me,” he replied, making you slap him, jokingly.

“I guess I could make that work,” you smiled. “But we’re watching a Disney movie.” He playfully groaned.

“Then I might need another incentive,” he said, glancing over to you.

“Like?” you asked.

“You and me, cuddled on the couch.”

“I think we can make that work.”

And did you guys make that work...

a/n: lmao I am so out of the writing groove, I'm sorry if that sucked :(((

[jonathantaylorthomas]

Spencer Pratt’s track by track reputation review

1. "...Ready for It?"

It’s such a "here we go, boom," turning the ignition on her Lamborghini or whatever she wants to have. That’s the vibe it has. "In the middle of the night, in my dreams, you should see the things we do, baby" — that right there, even with all the new songs, hits me so hard. I’ve heard it now a thousand times and every time it makes me sing to the clouds. That is poetic, like some shit Robert Frost would have been writing back in the day. Now that I know it’s the first on the album, it’s just even more powerful. It’s showing the swag that she’s gonna bring. Are you ready for it? I wasn’t actually ready for it. And the "let the games begin" — she already knows all the haters are gonna be out here. All the little blogs, all the little posts. Let the games begin. She knows she just brought this heat on so many people.

I’m so torn because I’m such a Kardashian diehard. I’m in such a weird predicament in this situation because she gets me so angry at Kim and Kanye on this album. It’s gonna be weird being a Kim fan post-Reputation. I’ll see how I can handle it. Maybe I’ll just only love Kris Jenner because you can’t blame Kris for anything.

2. "End Game"

Here’s the thing with "End Game." Future is one of my top 10 all-time, so when I saw the track list leak and I saw Future on it I was so excited. Heidi thinks it’s fine. She thinks I’m way too Swift ganged out, she’s like, "He barely spits eight bars, Spencer." I’m like, "Yeah, those could have been eight bars of Taylor lyrics." That’s how deep I am right now in the Taylor gang where I didn’t need either of them on that song. I don’t need to hear Ed Sheeran rapping. When he started singing I was like, "OK, homie’s got pipes." I’m feeling those singing parts. But him rapping with his Irish accent, I was like, "Come on now." I don’t need this in my life. I don’t need Taylor to be on any records with anybody, just like I wouldn’t need Michael Jackson to be on a record with somebody. At a certain level you’re only wanting to hear that person because they’re a damn superstar. But I started liking it because my conspiracy mind was like, "Ooo, maybe Future doesn’t like Kanye and there’s more to this." Like he hit Taylor up like, "Yo fuck Yeezy, let me get on a record with you." Future’s eight billion times doper than Kanye so it’s kinda like, "I don’t need Kanye West I got Future on my team." I hope Kanye’s now like, "Damn, Future’s riding with her." That makes me like it, if there’s a conspiracy that Future wanted to piss off Kanye.

3. "I Did Something Bad"

This should be the next single, one billion percent. I hope she spends $10 million on the damn music video. I don’t know what she did bad, so I think that’s the joke. I feel that. Because I didn’t do anything bad and I got straight up hated on The Hills for somebody lying about their own thing they were lying about and I become the liar and the leaker. I love this because I’m like, "OK, if I did something bad it feels so good because you’re the damn liar." I’m thinking she’s referencing this whole Snapchat thing, I don’t know. I’m sure the Swiftie YouTubers will break it down better than I will. For me, I relate to it because I didn’t do anything bad and I got hated and I have no idea why people hate on Taylor. Because she wants to have a really good image? Because she didn’t go out like Katy Perry and act like she’s some damn politician in the media? I don’t know wanna know who Taylor votes for. I don’t care. I wanna hear hit damn records out of her and that’s it. I wanna see her go on dates in Rome with frickin' Tom Hiddleston. That’s what I wanted to see, not her running around with Hillary Clinton. I’m sure people are like, "She could have stopped Trump." No she couldn’t, people! Hello, Hillary won the popular vote! What, is she gonna switch the electoral college vote? I don’t think so, so everyone needs to move off of, “Oh, I hate Taylor because she didn’t campaign enough.” I hate that shit. She’s a frickin’ pop star.

4. "Don't Blame Me"

This one’s amazing. This is what I imagine I’m gonna play when I’m feeding my hummingbirds. My hummers are gonna love this one. I also love it because I just had a baby and my baby’s definitely like my drug that I’m straight high off of, snorting his little hair off his head daily, so again I feel like she’s writing for me. I know she’s talking about Joe or whatever. By the way, I need to do more research about Joe because this guy is frickin’ Romeo on steroids. He’s got Taylor so damn sprung it’s overwhelming. I feel like she just made her own Ex Machina robot Ava but Joe. She went to the mountains to live next to the waterfall and had Google make her a boyfriend.

5. "Delicate"

I love this one. I know people are gonna be like, "Are you crazy, it’s nothing like it," but to me it reminds me of my wife’s song "Fanatic." I love when the beat comes in. The production on this album is just phenomenal. Her voice sounds the best it’s ever sounded. Everything just sounds so smooth and glossy and just makes me wanna drink red wine and eat cheese and crackers. I love “my reputation’s never been worse.” That’s why I’m riding Taylor so hard lately because fools are on the timeline hating on her like Spencer 2009. I’m telling you, the last time I saw this type of hate was targeted at me. When did Taylor become as hated as Spencer Pratt?

6. "Look What You Made Me Do"

It’s so unique. It could have been the first song instead of "...Ready for It?" To me, she’s snapping on this album. That’s why I love "Look What You Made Me Do." That’s why I keep playing it. That’s why as long as I have Snapchat it will be go-to, because there’s just moments throughout the day where I just feel like, "Look what you just made me do." That’ll always be my favorite Taylor Swift song for life. The second that dropped I was like, "Oh my god, who is this? This is Taylor Swift?" I feel like I’m rising up from the dead. I feel like I’m just coming in the game like Taylor. Taylor and I are on parallel journeys right now.

7. "So It Goes..."

This’ll be good in a movie scene or something. I don’t wanna say least favorite, but this is on the bottom of my rotation. So far I’ve probably played this song maybe twice out of ones I now played probably 100 times. The thing about certain songs though, if it’s in the right setting, like if I was late night in London and this came on and I was sipping tequila on ice and maybe the vibe was right, I could see it. Right now it’s definitely not getting in my Snapchat rotation which tells you the level, but I’m not gonna go and say it’s a bad song. There’s such insane records on the album I don’t know how it made the cut, let’s just say that.

8. "Gorgeous"

"Gorgeous" to me will always remind me of my baby being two weeks old and how beautiful his little face is. There are better songs on this album but "Gorgeous" should win a Grammy. That’s how crazy this album is, that this is now going probably toward the bottom with "So It Goes..." which is so trippy. It’s a perfect Taylor song. This is what people want from her. It’s less flashy. It seems like it was from the Red album or 1989. It still sounds fresh but the vibe is the pre-dead Taylor.

9. "Getaway Car"

The best part about Taylor’s life is that I really listen to these lyrics trying to decode her life. Very few artists have lives so wild that you can care so much about their lyrical content. This hook is unbelievable. It sounds like an '80s jam. It seems like it would be in the new Goonies movie. [Tom Hiddleston] was like a James Bond to her! He was doing that dope-ass spy TV show, he’s probably all spy swaggy. I really loved them together so I’m still kind of sad about [their breakup]. I wish they would get back in that getaway car. The fact that he really wore that "I Love T.S." shirt when he was pretty much an A-list movie star and was out there at that barbecue — he was all in. She got him. People were like, "That was fake." He was not about to look that corny with his brand unless he was really all like, "Oh my god, I love this little hundred-millionaire girl."

10. "King of My Heart"

"King of My Heart" is not one of my favorites. Girl, don’t give Joe your soul yet! You just started dating.

11. "Dancing With Our Hands Tied"

Ooo, I love this one. This reminds me of "“Style." It may be one of my top three favorites. The music video is gonna be just so Fifty Shades of Grey-ed out. The ones that are super positive have to be Joe. She’s not about to give any of those dudes positive content at this point. This is just fire.

12. "Dress"

I hope she told her mom and dad, "Don’t listen to this one." At 0:49 when she starts doing the pant-y breathing? I think that’s one of her best moments of singing. That hits my fricking holy damn spirit. Bless. "Carve your name into my bedpost?" Whoa, girl! She is out here living her best sexual life. "Everyone thinks that they know us but they know nothing about..." That’s Speidi right there, girl! She’s pouring her life onto these pages. She has nothing to lose now. She wanted to just open up her heart to everyone. She doesn’t need to do interviews if she writes songs like this. She doesn’t need to reply to people, she just can write these hits. "Flashback to my mistakes." Damn, she’s just telling everybody what they want to hear. Like, "People, I’m just a human. I’m just out here trying to live my life. Why do you judge me so hard for trying to be a girl out here and trying to find love?" People are on her case so hard. Leave Taylor alone!

13. "This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things"

I don’t think it’s about Kanye. Would she have really called Kanye a friend? I don’t feel like she ever let him into her life on a friend level. I think it’s one of those girls. I feel like Karlie Kloss got clipped the hardest out of the squad, but the whole squad got clipped too. How is Spencer Pratt riding harder for Taylor Swift’s new singles than any of that clique that she had at all her barbecues that I’m sure she sent Hermès bags to? Cars, who knows what Taylor gift levels are. Her fake-ass squad pisses me off so much, how they didn’t step up during all her drama. It’s mind-boggling. Maybe not all the squad were real friends, but I think at least Karlie Kloss looked like a real enough fake friend. Where are you, girl? Where have you been? Don’t even get me started.

14. "Call It What You Want"

"Call It What You Want" is just beyond beautiful. My homie that does not listen to pop, he said, "Man, those lyrics are like straight trap lyrics." The lyrical swag in his one, just like "brought a knife to a gunfight," "all the liars are calling me one" — those lyrics right there will go down forever to me. This is top-four I would say. I love "all the jokers dressing up as kings." That’s definitely Kanye. He’s always dressing all, "Oh, I’m so fashion, Mr. Fashion King," and she’s just calling him a straight clown.

15. "New Year's Day"

This just made me so sad that I’ve never been invited to any of Taylor’s parties. This one kind of got me emotional. None of those squad members deserve to be at any of those catered events. I’m so glad she eliminated all those people from her life. Those were all leeches. It’s great everything turned out the way it did.

[drink-n-watch]

Genre : Happiness, otome, mullet reverse harem, magical boy

Episodes: 12

Studio: Brain’s Base

  Yui is just your average run of the mill, beautiful, smart, sweet, kendo practicing high school girl capable of immediately accepting and adapting to any situation no matter how outlandish and one day she is swept away to a magical garden/high school full of god boys from various mythologies brought together by Zeus to develop a better understanding of mankind. That old story. We’ve all been in this exact situation a billion times right? It’s happen to me twice this week alone! You know how these things go, eventually we have to drown a pretty blond boy to avoid a Matrix type Ragnarok. Yawn.

I never know how to qualify these shows. They’re not exactly cute boys doing cute things, I mean they don’t really fall into the slice of life category at all. Technically you could call them reverse harems, I mean that is what they are but this title could fool you into thinking they are romantic storylines. The are not. The romance (if any) is usually completely secondary and only serves as an excuse to bring the characters together. It’s rarely central to the story and in this case was completely irrelevant to the main conflict.

If anything, you can recognize these shows by their standard dating sim adaptation structure which means we get separate mini storylines for every boy and their unabashed embrace of kitch. When done well these are pleasant, slightly manservicy comedies that will make you giggle, when they’re done badly they are annoying and infinitely stupid. When done very badly – the are comedy Gold! I’ll level with you, at this point I find it really hard to tell the difference.

nice hair…

All of this as just to explain that I have to be in a particular mood to review these types of shows. A mood I like to call: frantically rapturous. It’s achieved by eating absolutely nothing but processed sugar for 3 days then writing the post real quick before the crash comes. The diabetes is more than worth it.

One of my favorite commenters Dawnstorm, clued me into this series by showing me this clip:

Please note the hair transformation!

Needles to say, I immediately took the rest of the day off and proceeded to binge this. As you can see, the art style is what you would expect, and you shouldn’t look too closely at angles or distant characters, but the transformation sequences are phenomenal. Sadly, there are very few of these, most characters only get a brief one in the last episode. This is unfortunate as the god costumes are one of the greatest cinematic achievements of our age. The mere sight of them will touch you in ways you did not think possible. Try not to drink before one as getting wine up your nose can really burn.

The animation is sporadic at best. Essentially, characters are mostly stationary or going through slow minimal movements and suddenly there is a burst of action that immediately dies down. It’s not a bad way to disguise limited resources and I enjoyed the visuals as whole. Voice acting is competent although I never quite got use to Loki’s voice. The best part however, is the ED which features actual bad lip-synching from our boys complete with moody scenery and art school project desaturated colors. It was my everything.

I’m just gonna throw this screencap in…

In structure, Kamigami no Asobi follows the standard otome template pretty closely. It should be noted however that there wasn’t enough time to concentrate on all the boys. This means that while Baldr and Loki are personally established and get their own quite important storyline, Thor is largely ignored. We see kitty boy Anubis cameo through the show but I’m not sure main character Yui even knows who he is. As a result, the world feels a little fuller than your standard otome offering where the only characters that seem to exist are the main cast. Otherwise, the show is fairly stereotypical but deeply enjoyable. Dawnstorm had already sold it as one of the best offerings of the genre and although I am not yet well versed enough to make this type of sweeping statement, I thoroughly enjoyed it.

The archetypical boys are all there, but they have been given just enough personality to be endearing and the narrative is careful to never take itself overly seriously. In fact, here’s Toth aptly describing the entire harem better than I ever could:

 The lighthearted, obviously caricatural hand with which everyone has been drawn is a great way to keep things light and easygoing. I get annoyed when these silly little shows try to take themselves too seriously and give their shallow characters overdramatic characterizations. It was also nice to see the ditzy trope applied to the otherwise perfect prince character.

However, otome heroines are usually one step up from plant life in these things. They seem an after thought with little to know personality beyond nice and unable. Unable to do what? Anything. In this, Kamigami towers over the competition with Yui who while undeniably nice is capable, restrained and seems to have actual interests and motivations of her own. Her character gets sideline a bit in later episodes and she becomes much less interesting but for the first half at least she is a refreshingly down to earth and rational heroin. In fact, watching Yui react just like any normal reasonable person would when put in traditional otome situations had me cracking up the entire time. For my money she could have been even more forceful and self-reliant but I still loved Yui and that’s saying something under the circumstances.

a rare example of the femullet

Like I said, the romantic aspects are usually a surprisingly small part of these shows and Kamigami pushes that even further. Although there are brief mentioned of attraction and vying for Yui’s attention here and there, the emotional core of the show, and most of the driving force behind the ultimate plot point has absolutely nothing to do with her at all. I must say this was quite unexpected and very welcomed. I sort of wish this was a different type of show that would have explored the Norse Mythology retelling they were going for instead. I mean with all the pretty magical boys of course.

The fact that these boys are given a touch more personality and backstory beyond their tragic pasts and how much they love the MC is an important element to flesh out the story a bit. The bigger established mythologies that get hinted at also add a bit of depth. By creating much sturdier foundations for the narrative than these shows usually get, the jokes land much more cleanly and I found that I was laughing along with the show almost as often as I was laughing at it.

ombre – fancy!

I was about to end this post without even going into the most important part. The mullets. Look at these glorious mullets! These are epic. Loki even has this awesome gradient in his that makes me want to dye my hair red again. (I won’t – it was a huge pain getting it white, I’m not messing with it now). Maybe it’s because I’m also watching FMA at the moment and Ed is rocking how own impressive mullet when he lets his hair down, but I’m starting to associate the hairstyle with pretty boys. THAT IS NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!

When did anime start to conspire to make me think mullets are attractive? I know this isn’t the first show to do it  

Still the mullet king – Pixiv Id 79390

but it’s the first time even the heroine sports one….and I really dig it! Thankfully my hair isn’t quite long enough to copy the look or else I probably would have cut it like that and be really sad now. But honestly, why is anime doing this to me? What’s the end game here? Guys, I’m scared…

the elusive side mullet

Favorite character: Thoth!!!

What this anime taught me: We must not get complacent in the fight against bad hairstyles

Adulthood has shown me that you really don’t need fun to have alcohol.

Suggested drink: Mount Olympus

Every time you see the Ame-no-Murakumo-no-Tsurugi – take a sip

if it’s in actual sword for – take another!

Every time Baldr is a clutz – point and laugh

Every time we see Melissa – take a sip

Every time Apollo is super eager – clap

Every time the blondes stick together – be suspicious

Every time Hades says misfortune – take a sip

Every time Thoht *corners* Yui – take a sip

Every time someone days “human” or “humanity” – drink some water

Every time they get the mythology right – take a sip

Every time spontaneous stripping – raise your glass

the actual emotional core of the series

Kamigami no Asobi and the Great Mullet Conspiracy Genre : Happiness, otome, mullet reverse harem, magical boy Episodes: 12 Studio: Brain's Base   Yui is just your average run of the mill, beautiful, smart, sweet, kendo practicing high school girl capable of immediately accepting and adapting to any situation no matter how outlandish and one day she is swept away to a magical garden/high school full of god boys from various mythologies brought together by Zeus to develop a better understanding of mankind.

[uterusclub]

The very moment we discovered Moulin Rouge was being made into a stage production, we KNEW we had to see it! Unfortunately, the debut occurred in Boston, which well, was expensive to fly to, but we were also, unsure of the ‘reviews’ for the show. It was decided, thereafter that whence it went to Broadway in NYC, we would make the trek. Thus, our adventure begins . . .

Our kick-off to NYC was not without it’s complications. My parents, fortunately, informed us that ‘work’ was being done on the blue line and therefore, offered a ride to an open station with which to catch the ‘el to the blue, then orange line (damn you Southwest for being so damn far). Rousing at 2:30 a.m. was fairly delirious due to Christmas Eve-ed sleep but we rallied as best we could and eventually arrived at Midway Airport with approximately 1/2 hour until boarding. It is at this point; we thanked the transportation Gods or rather, ourselves, for being pre-check TSA members as we quite literally waltzed through security in a matter of minutes. Booyah! Chicago to New York travel time is not terrible – approximately 2 hours. We amused ourselves by using the on-flight, Wi-Fi entertainment to watch Crazy Rich Asians, which was good enough to pass the time.

Off the plane and on our way to public transportation, I left all the work to Sharon who had watched a video about catching buses from the airport to travel into the city. First step, get a ticket to catch a bus to a connecting bus/train. Next – get on appropriate bus to take us to . . . oh wait – is this the correct bus? Yep, immediate confusion. Sharon’s phone kept re-routing which caused her ultimate reaction to be ‘let’s just go one more stop’ as we could see our pinpoint on a map begin to divert from our destination. Long story short, we got off in, who knows where, and caught an Uber already housing a very nice couple who bid us well in our travels once they departed.

We were dropped off at our first, essential stop – a gift and luggage store in Times Square to relieve ourselves of our burdensome baggage. Sketch-tastic to say the least but the concern grew less worrisome as we noticed a multitude of said shops along the streets of Times Square. Luggage-free, we headed to our first endeavor: Madame Tussauds Wax Museum! There was quite a line outside but surprisingly, it moved along quickly and we entered without a hitch (thanks Groupon). Naturally, we grabbed a bunch of awesome pictures – despite the fact that I was unfamiliar with a good portion of the figures we observed. It was delightful surprise to see a commemoration of Cats since we’d seen the production recently (refer to previous blog), however the best part of the entire exhibit was most definitely the Phantom of the Opera shtick where you could pretend you were singing as Christine and also stand/sit on a fake chandelier! Let me not forget the mirror maze as well which, at one point, I lost Sharon and careened into glass with my phone on several occasions.

Following our wax museum adventure, we walked next door to the conveniently situated Ripley’s exhibit (again, thanks Groupon). Now I’ve never, personally been a huge fan of these since I don’t care to reach much but I guess this is a Sharon nostalgia thing. In any case, it was pseudo interesting. We took a few pictures and Sharon disappointingly found a Zoltare machine that provided no physical fortune. There was a cool, trippy, tunnel in the middle of the exhibit, which was cool for a minute but nothing to write home about (irony). Towards the end of our walk through, it became pretty apparently that we were both STARVING. We had made reservations at a little French restaurant down the street; however, we were a bit early but proceeded there anyway.

Le Rivage was our first food stop for our trip! I did minimal research on this place but based on location, reviews, and the fact that they did a show pre-fix meal option, was pretty much sold. We were both pleasantly surprised that the restaurant appeared casual and ‘classic’ – if that makes sense. This place was definitely not ‘hopping’ and had a more ‘old-school’ feel to it that we both dig. Upon being seated at our table, I noticed a can-can picture in an adjoining seating area and made my way over there to grab some pictures. We pre-faced our meals with mimosas and indulged in a French Onion Soup Burger and Boeuf Bourguignon – both DELICIOUS! Swooning in culinary satisfaction, it was now time to get MORE physical uncomfortable. Up to this point, I have failed to mention our ingenious plan on packing our Moulin Rouge-designated outfits in our purses. A much-debated discussion, it made much more sense to dress sensibly for the plane ride and then change into said outfits right before the show – especially since mine involved a tulle skirt and corset! Post-meal, we both took turns walking downstairs to the restroom to change. I’m not sure how Sharon’s transition went but it was quite the production getting in a corset and tulle shirt in a tiny, bathroom stall. Once I excited the stall and begin adding my accessories at the sink, an older lady entered and quite literally gawked at me. She complimented me and just continued to stare before mentioning that she’d heard the producer of the movie Moulin Rouge raved that the stage production was ‘spectacular.’ Transition complete, I headed upstairs to rejoin Sharon and was met with silenced stares all around the dining room. Quite honestly, I did NOT think the outfit was THAT unusual. It probably didn’t help that I was filming the entire area for the duration of the stare-down. Almost felt like I should have choreographed something as part of my exit! Next time.

Get-ups secured, we were now set and ready for Moulin Rouge situated just about a block or two down the street. It was about an hour til show time but upon arriving at the Al Hirschfield Theatre, there was already a line down the block. For the next 40ish minutes, we stood in line with beaming hot sun and bellowing scalpers antagonizing our wills to live. At one point, I peered into the restaurant we stood outside of and saw a girl conveniently dressed in what I’d consider Moulin Rouge attire. She would eventually be seated nearby us like some groupie conspiracy. Once inside the theatre, complete chaos ensued. Sharon immediately went to grab some very expensive sippy-cupped drinks while I perused the gift-shop area – convinced I would pay anything for something Moulin Rouge-inspired. But a $100 hoodie was not in my budget. So I opted for a magnet. When we finally entered the seating area, our minds and eyes were BLOWN! The stage was BEYOND gorgeous! I was most impressed and grateful that everyone was allowed to take as much video and pictures as they liked – although that eventually became annoying when we attempted to take a selfie with no one in the background (impossible)! We received MANY compliments on our outfits and ended up sitting towards some like-minded Moulin Rouge fans who raved about it being their favorite movie. As the minutes neared show time, performers began slowly slinking about the stage in scantily clad outfits – staring Legolasy at the audience.

Once the show was underway, it was magic – but with some drawbacks. Sharon and I would later have a full-blown, extended conversation about the show but to summarize our feelings on it, it could have been better or perhaps, different. As purists, we honestly just wanted a replication of the movie on stage. This, was not as such. The main story line was there, sure, but the adaptation felt a bit forced – almost TOO much freedom was taken with it, I fear. To be more specific and assuming you’re familiar with the movie, the original does throw-backs to a few contemporary songs. This show took that concept and multiplied it by a thousand ie there were a lot MORE snippets of a lot more RECENT songs which, again, I feel lost any sense of integrity. Every time a throw-back clip was initiated, audience members laughed in recognition, which to me, makes a mockery of the movie. Sharon internally lost her shit when Satine began singing Katy Perry’s ‘Firework’ and I couldn’t agree more. I wont knock it and say there weren’t SOME good additions – for instance, Christian singing Gnarls Barkley’s ‘Crazy’ but all in all, it didn’t work for either of us and I’m fairly sure we were the only ones in the theatre feeling that way.

With a slightest defeatist attitude, we made our way back to the gift and luggage store to re-burden ourselves with our belongings. It was at this point, Sharon realized one of the wheels on her luggage bag was defective and not moving. Scraping her back down the street, she ultimately began carrying her entire case in her arms like a massive, dumb baby. While we were, fortunately, not going too far, the walk, still in our uncomfortable outsides, felt long. We eventually arrived at our next stop: Bibble & Sip which is an ADORABLE coffee/tea/pastry shop that is Alpaca themed! With the combination of luggage frustration and scrunchiness, Sharon remained in the distance while I got in line to grab some goods to go. I opted for a Good Luck Hazelnut Alpaca dessert and Black and White Mouse cake which were, oh my god, AMAZING!!

Our desserts weren’t consumed until we arrived at our Airbnb which again, was trekked to under blistering heat, faulty luggage and air-constricting clothing. But we made it! Sharon had found this joint situated at 50th and 3rd Avenue in East Manhattan. The ‘renter’ was a Japanese man who, based off of the amount of signage and locks on things, appeared to be a bit OCD but it tolerable. We had a bed and couch, ability to access a/c and well, minimal tv capabilities. All in all, not a bad set-up and for the price and location, no complaints! After arriving, we changed and ‘regrouped’ for a minute before deciding NOT to venture out for a late-night, rooftop silent-disco we had acquired tickets for. Instead, we decided to slum it for the remainder of the evening – and by ‘slumming,’ I mean grabbing drinks and getting some dinner.

During the course of our very, extensive research, one of us had come across a place called Ophelia Lounge that was conveniently located a few blocks from our Airbnb. We headed there for a celebratory, evening drink and were very impressed with the elevated view, delicious cocktails and unpretentious hospitality! We had only wished it had been later in the evening for an even more spectacular, night view. Following our drinks, we attempted to pre-order our food for pick-up but the restaurant we called was busy so we walked over to Hide-Chan for ramen that I’d read wonderful things about. The restaurant was confusingly situated next to another Asian restaurant that we accidentally venture into first. We then headed next door to the ascending stairway at which time, the hostess informed us they didn’t do ‘take away’ requests. Huh. Odd. We then asked if the adjoining restaurant was there was well but couldn’t exactly make out the response but upon going next door, the men was most definitely, NOT ramen. We then decided it was in our best interest to hike back UP the stairs and just eat there and I’m very glad we did. This was the first time I’d ever seen/ordered garlic butter edameme and it was AMAZING! This was also the first time I’d been asked about the firmness level and shape of my noodles. In any case, food was STELLAR. My only complaint would be the SUPER boisterous, young Asian men seated next to us who were having the time of their LIVES! Ramen in bellies, we headed home and passed the eff out. Day one = complete!

The next morning, we roused fairly early with plans of walking to Central Park, which was about 30 minutes away. After heading out, we grabbed coffee at a Dunkin Donuts and made our away to Central Park Zoo to see their red pandas and penguin feeding. The zoo, while quaint, was comfortable and their employees, very helpful. While in line for our tickets, Sharon inquired if there were any bats and were told yes! Making our rounds once inside, we up the bats first which was nothing short of a glassed, dark room with flittering figures. At one point, I asked Sharon to use her phone flashlight to see if the bats were hanging on the ceiling and sure enough, they were! Walking clock-wise, we hit up the red pandas next but sadly, saw nothing. We continued on our way to came across the seals that were super adorable and rambunctious. We then circled back to the red pandas and were pointed out one, hidden and barely moving, shrouded in foliage. Our last stop off was the children’s petting zoo, which contained guess what – an Alpaca – and some sheep’s that were cool. Sharon was offended the Alpaca walked away from her after supplying some food.

After our fill of animals, we now headed through Central Park in order to see Belvedere Castle. On the way, Sharon bought a hot dog from a vendor who attempted to up-charge her. She was offended with both the hot dog and the altercation. Once we reached the castle, we were both pretty underwhelmed. The joint was swarming with people and it was a clusterfuck attempting to ascend the narrow, winding staircase to get to the view-top. Continuing on our way through the park, we were now headed towards Astro West Fine Minerals, Fossils and Meteorites shop, however finding an exit out of the park became problematic. We kept walking, soaked in our own, hot juices, for what felt like forever. On several occasions I suggested scaling the walls in order to reach actual ‘street.’ And of course, once we asked where an exit was, it was a few feet ahead of us.

Making our way to the streets, we eventually found Astro West Fine Minerals, Fossils and Meteorites, which, our sole purpose was to split a geode for a souvenir. I had called the shop a few days prior to inquire if they had an ‘abundant’ available since I’d read complaints about them being out of stock. When we arrived, there were maybe 15 available – all ugly blobs situated inside a marked barrel. I selected one based off solely based on its symmetry and we watched the machine in action that was really just a glorified saw. Once split, the attendant showed us the inside which he described as a ‘light blue.’ I’d describe it as a bunch of bullshit, personally. Definitely NOT worth $25. But I guess you win some, you lose some.

Next on the agenda was Grand Central Station. Arriving in style via Uber, we immediately made our way upstairs to the Campbell Bar, which is allegedly haunted. Our bartender was pretty awesome and gave us some free shots. The decor was outstanding. To keep on schedule, we then headed back downstairs to find the Jacque Torres Chocolate shop on ground level. On our way, I caught an amazing ceiling in my peripheral view and followed it to an outstanding, horoscopial view! We then continued on our original journey, found the chocolate shop and nibbled on some free samples before grabbing another Uber for our next venture!

Remember Stomp? Yes, I know, it’s definitely been a minute. I haven’t thought or heard of it in a very long time but it is most definitely alive and kicking! I should know. We bought tickets. I wasn’t exactly sure what to expect with this show – not that I wasn’t familiar with the basis for the show – but the longevity of its existence made me a bit leery. When we arrived, we were told no photos or videos were allowed. Ok, fine. We took our seats at the far, back end of the theatre but were eventually upgraded for ‘good behavior’ to the second row! Once the show began, I was in COMPLETE awe. I think that a good portion of the show, I was imagining myself a part of it – like, I actually started considering trying to audition for it! I was blown away by the talent and attitudes of all the performers. Everyone appeared to be having such a good time with each other but also as solo performers. Talk about an inspiration! Next time you’re in NYC, definitely make a point to see the show!

Just around the corner from Stomp was our highly anticipated dinner reservation at Beetle House! Which reminds me, I dressed for the occasion – ie I bought and wore green, light-up suspenders for a good portion of the day. In any case, we were far too early upon arrival and as such, loitered outside the restaurant a bit. Eventually we were let in and seated. The restaurant was cool, yes, but very tiny and a bit understated for what I had anticipated. We had both seen video clips promoted the restaurant that entailed costumed performers. We saw none of this, which sure, it was still relatively ‘early’ but nonetheless, the emo-inspired work staff didn’t really convey much of a Burton feel to me. Our meal option was a pre-fix appetizer and main course that we were both pretty underwhelmed with. We did order some cocktails, which apparently all come with dry ice for major points for smokey drinks! All in all, disappointed. I’d go back – but only for the drinks.

Following our dissatisfied meal, we then took a transit-commute from hell in hopes of reaching Brooklyn. After being given opposing directions from pedestrians and Sharon’s wonky, ever-changing GPS assistance, we eventually ended up at a witch store and then eventually at Urban Jungle  – a thrift store. Again, unimpressed with this underwhelming Ragstock wanna-be, we continued onto Brooklyn Cider House. This place, well, seemingly pleasant, left us wanting in terms of customer service AND cider. Our waiter was less than helpful with recommendations and most of the drink options appeared to be ‘dry.’ As our spirits continued to dwindle, we then headed to the bookend for the evening – Theatre XIV for burlesque! And if you haven’t yet caught the trend, we were again, far too early to be admitted so we walked down the street to a bar called the Johnson for some $6 ‘Painkillers’ ie. frozen, pina colorado concoction. Four drinks later and claw-machine defeated, we were buzzed back to a state of satisfaction. Making our way back to the theatre, we entered and marveled at the Fifty Shaded Wonderland surrounding us.

Adorned to the nines, this show, Queen of Hearts, was eccentric, to say the least! I have NEVER seen such a mind-boggling burlesque show in my LIFE! There were obvious, classically trained dancers involved, not to mention, MANY male performers. Dancing, singing, hooping – there was no end to the extravagances our eyes beheld. Speaking of, we spent a good portion of the show staring at the couple seated in front of us which entailed a very uncomfortably, molesty dude who we could only assume, was sloppy rich. We discussed trying to corner his companion in the bathroom to find out what the deal was but we were both far too lazy. Sharon bought me an expensive, gingery cocktail that was god-awful. We followed up the rest of the night’s consumption with canned ciders from which we both got pretty blitzed! While we awaited our Uber, we saw the aforementioned creepoid with his girl being photographed by police officers. We can only begin to wonder whatever came of them but I’d be very confident picking him out of a lineup. For the duration of our Uber ride home and still beaming from booze, we spent the entire ride arguing over the virtual trivia game situated in the backseat area. Sharon doesn’t recall giving me bad/wrong answers and/or giving me crap for being incorrect but it was boisterous and most likely, very annoying, fun.

Ah, good o’ hungover Monday. Yikes! With a slightly rough-start to the morning, we took our time getting ride in order to avoid the hectic, rush-hour commuter traffic. After pre-GPSing our route, we successfully public transited to Supermoon Bakehouse for some blueberry and Pomegranate croissants! Sharon was mind-blown by this place – simply based on not only the aesthetic peel of their goods but also, the deliciousness! High recommendations for this joint – although, I’d suggest taking your food items to go since the tables and chairs were that of children.

Continuing our route, we now headed towards what would appear to be Chinatown for a confusing stop-off at a gorgeous, Jewish Temple museum called Eldridge Street. I’d literally come across this place during research and noted that Mondays were their pay-what-you-can. Being non-religious and certainly non-Jewish, my interest was all about the glorified ambience and were were NOT disappointed. There was a calm, safe, feel to the temple. Definitely one of the more beautiful things I’d high recommend when visiting NYC.

Next on the roster? Catacombs! Oh but wait, this isn’t what it sounds like, unfortunately. The description was giving us Catacombs by Candlelight, which we both assumed, would somehow involve ghosts. This was not as such. We were met with quasi-interesting, New York history involving politicians and rich families that were memorialized in the underground passageways. The highlight of the tour was the Australian couple we spoke with briefly about koalas – duh. I’m sure under different circumstances (not tired, hung-over, bored, hot, wanting ghost stories), one would find this tour highly interesting (my mother) but ‘twas not as such. The tour even ran a bit over-time so we bounced early to catch an Uber to our lunch at Thai Villa.

I researched this restaurant and loved it solely based on its gorgeousness. Unfortunately, we caught this place during the boisterous, lunch rush and weren’t entirely able to enjoy any sense of calm. We could barely speak due to the deafening sound – including the pretentious, vapid couple next to us. I did not enjoy my pai thai but was also suffering from post-laxative discomfort, to be fair. We ate as quickly as possible and headed out towards the next item of our agenda: Rose Wine Mansion.

Once again, with reservations at 2pm and us far too early, we killed a minute or two buying an I Love New York, pink onesie for Bear (yeah, yeah, he loves it) from a souvenir shop before standing restlessly in line for admittance.

When we were finally hustled in, accompanied by an ear-drum throbbing, security alarm, we took an elevator to the entrance of the exhibit. As we were basically the first people in ‘line,’ we got first dibs on every single room. We also didn’t care too much about the ‘interactive elements’ of most rooms, which killed a lot of time. We pressed on fairly quickly as we are want to do, indulging in our favorite, Cleopatra-endorsed red wine, Banfi Rosa Regale. Case in point, we drank some last night (8/2/2019) as you can buy it at Binny’s (SO good)! Other than that and taking a bunch of free photo-booth pictures post-exhibit, it was a quick in and out for us.

Making our way down the street, we stopped off at the free Houdini Museum situated, strangely, inside a high-rise building. The ‘museum’ was quite small, though we were told it was the second largest in the world. We took a once-around stroll while some magic nerds exchanged card tricks in the center of the room. Disinterest in tact, we caught another Uber with a delightful, Asian man who almost got pulled over for running a light but played off his foreignness to get out of it and eventually showed me his uncompleted dragon tattoo. He dropped us off near Enchantments – an occult store we’ve previously ordered, personalized candles. The store was awesome – cute, black kitties sleeping and hilarious, witchy employees who seems very down to earth. We requested personalized, carved candles and hung out for the duration of their creation. Once obtained, we headed over to one of the many bars on our roster for the afternoon: Mother of Pearl. Hawaiian-themed, this joint, wasn’t, again, open when we arrived so we pre-drank at a hookah lounge down the street. Once we re-attempted Mother of Pearl, was ordered their well-known ‘Shark attack’ drinks which I found unimpressive. I also can’t recall what type of alcohol they entailed but definitely, not my jam. Our bartender though, was pretty awesome.

The evening continued with an Uber back to where we had been for the Rose Mansion for two more bars: The Magic House Rooftop Bar & Lounge and The Fleur Room. Now the Magic House Rooftop Bar & Lounge sounded and looked very impressed from the videos I’d watched. There’s rotating carousal seats, mini-golf and an awesome view. But in all reality, the in-person was not up to snuff. All the carousal seats were ‘reserved,’ the ‘mini golf’ consisted of maybe four rounds revolving around sexified animal statues and the drinks were, well, at least mine, expensive and just terrible. Waste of time and money – not to mention all the effort to actually get UP to the joint! Security is completely elaborate and unnecessary – I felt like the goddamn FBI was running the entire thing! Not a fan. Next up – The Fleur Room. To be fair, we were both kind of at our wit’s end at this point in time. Once we made our way up to the bar, again, beautiful, poshy views and the decor was GORGEOUS but after looking at the drink menu, I just couldn’t do it. I was super over the expensive, elaborate drinks that sounded and inevitably, tasted like garbage. Maybe I’m not sophisticated enough to get the appear or maybe these places are just trying too hard. Either way, we refused to spend more money on drinks we’d end up hating and just took our necessary pictures and videos to supply to ya’ll.

As our final stop-off and NOT on our original agenda (we cut a bunch of stuff), Sharon researched a pizza joint nearby our Airbnb for an easy, chill dinner at the home front. She came across Patsy’s Pizzeria. I called in a large, garlic and cheese pizza for pick-up during which time; a lovely Jamaican woman named Diana who complimented my tattoos and pants accosted me. This woman kept on talking about her brother being a dance choreographer and professional in Milwaukee and eventually tried to network us. I gave minimal interesting and effort in the exchange on account of exhaustion and hunger. Eventually, pizza was on hand and we made it back home to consume said pizza that was actually pretty decent.

Our final day in NYC was quite a doozy. We woke up fairly early and again, killed time to avoid the rush hour, commute traffic. Luggage in tow, we caught some pre-GPS-ed public transit to NYC’s Magic Jewelry to get aura photographs. After once again, standing in line, waiting for the place to open, a little crowd began to form behind us. Eventually, one snap and a brief explanation later, we were done! Side note: Sharon is now obsessed with purchasing the equipment to start her own business. We then walked over to the nearby Ghostbusters Fire Station that became a clusterfuck due to the gapping tour crowd and the fact that the firehouse is ACTIVE. We stood and waited for a truck to pull into it before snapping a few pictures and heading immediately away.

After once again, catching pre-GPS-ed public transit, we now headed towards of lunch-stop: Cafe Colette. This place got awesome reviews and also had beautiful pictures of the inside. When we arrived, the staff obligingly took our luggage from us for storage. I was once again, underwhelmed by the atmosphere, however, the food was definitely on point! Sharon apparently ate some orgasmic chicken sandwich while I consumed some delicious, fish tacos. We were both quite satisfied. Trudging along with our luggage we continued on our way to the Williamsburg Hotel for their Hightea Teapot cocktails we’d seen advertised videos for. When we arrived at the bar, our bartender, Angelo, advised that it was not available during weekdays. After a polite plea by Sharon, he agreed to make us a cocktail anyway which we shared and was MOST delicious! With time to kill and dessert on my brain, I suggested we find a place for dessert. Sharon quickly googled a nearby French pastry shop by the name of Caprices by Sophie. We shared a delightful, chocolate éclair before ultimately deciding that we should forgo any additional, scheduled plans and head straight to the airport.

One very long Uber ride later, we were at LaGuardia several hours early for our flight. Once we again, fast-tracked through security via Pre-check TSA and began to get settled, Sharon noticed our flight had been canceled! And queue confusion and anxiety. Never have I had this happen to me before. As we had already checked into our flight, I was unable to attempt a reschedule on my phone. We ended up lining up at the Southwest desk in order to speak with an attendant. Throughout the chaos, we realized there was an earlier flight boarding for Chicago. With attempts and determining if the flight was booked, Sharon called Southwest and was told, they could not advise as such. We were, safe-net, booked into a later flight that would eventually connect in St. Louis with an arrival in Chicago at midnight; however, we were still hoping to hope on this flight about to leave. Eventually, amidst the chaos and confusion and annoying and anxiety, we were allowed onto the earlier flight home which, with it’s own delays; brought us home at approximately the same time we were originally scheduled to arrival. The hellish commute involved sitting on the runway for takeoff for god knows how long and my discomfort with a very antsy, obnoxious, Alabamian seated next to me. Despite the very, very long commute, the dadness grabbed us at the Montrose blue-line, accompanied with Bear whose distress meowing ironically comforted me. When we reached our wonderful, sweet, home, we showered to rid ourselves of the New York stink, downed some food and barely absorbed some background television.

It’s crazy to think about how fast-paced Chicago is and yet, New York feels even faster! Or perhaps it’s the abundance of things and people and the distance between places that makes it feel so much more arduous. It could also have to do with our inclinations of packing in as much funness as possible into every single trip. Regardless, Chicago was most definitely missed. We were a part of you, New York, New York, but you can keep your hot, street garbage.

Where the Streets Have Hot Garbage The very moment we discovered Moulin Rouge was being made into a stage production, we KNEW we had to see it!