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toldmystory-madehistory · 7 years

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Re-Starting The Journey

It has been a long time since I have updated this blog. Truth is, life got insanely busy and my journey hit many, many road blocks. I had big plans for this blog. Big plans for my weight loss journey and it just all crumbled before my eyes. This first update in a very long time will be raw, real, and open, tackling a few things I have put off consistently because of disappointment in myself, in the journey and in the choices I have made on some things. I warn you that it will be long, and most likely will start to ramble. But here I give everyone an update on the journey and what is next.

Let’s start with the good. In 2015, after several disappointments in my weight loss journey and a overall very hard time finding a job that made me happy, doing something that I love, I decided to apply for grad school with the hopes of getting a degree in Music Industry Administration. I was accepted and started in August of that year. Fast forward to May 2017, I sit here now with said Masters degree and wonder what is next, where to start? What to do? During the tenure of my masters program, I was meeting a lot of new people, changing in ways I never thought I would. I became more open, got better at public speaking, learned how to network and interact with people in ways I never could before.

But I was also going through another side journey. Watching all that I had worked for in my weight loss journey fall apart. I was at the tail end of a several month struggling mightily with my purpose on my journey. I was no longer losing weight, I was stagnant, and I felt no matter what I did I was no longer going to lose weight and that frustrated me to no end. I felt I could eat fast food or another meal of chicken and broccoli and see the same results. I was switching up my workouts, trying new additions, changing the cardio, everything that I could think of and nothing seemed to work. The stress and anxiety of this time, I’ve come to learn a bit more, was probably a huge indicator of why nothing was happening. Our bodies are marvelous things. They respond accordingly to what they sense we are feeling. My body was under major stress and felt it needed to hold on to whatever it had. My trainer at that time, bless her heart, tried everything she could as well. It got to a point that my food was so strict that if I couldn’t track single morsel, I wasn’t eating it. In the end, I was completely unhappy in any fitness and nutrition capacity and just had no desire to continue what I felt had become a chore.

So I started my program, while working, and commented to Northridge every week for classes, projects, and events, and just pretty much let my fitness journey fall. I could no longer afford training, so I just figured I was done. I put my full focus into my program while kind of going to the gym irregularly and still continuing to prep food but not really track it as much as I used to. I still ate relatively healthy for the most part, but ate a lot more junk that I had been when I started my journey in 2011.

In 2016, I felt a desire to, again, start to lose the weight, but had a strong lack of motivation to start over because I was so upset at myself for basically undoing all that I had worked so hard to accomplish. I was angry at myself, still am, about basically gaining most of the weight back and getting back to a place I swore I never would. My mood, my stressors, my anxiety, and most importantly, my confidence, have all taken quite the hit since then. I was genuinely happy and fully confident in myself for what felt like the first time ever at the beginning of my weight loss journey, but that has gone away. It will take a lot of work to get back there, but I am determined to do so. But I am getting a bit ahead of myself.

Flashback to 2016 and that desire to start losing the weight again and the thought of having to go through that again killed me. Did I really want to put myself through all of that again? Let me tell you one thing, the mind is a very powerful thing. It will tell you things that will never be true, but will convince you they are. And I struggled still, in staying consistent. I knew with my commute, working 30 hours a week, and trying to get my Masters, adding the gym back into my routine would be no easy task. I knew I would have to be so on top of everything.

I knew what needed to be done, because I had done it before, but just didn’t know how I would fit everything or really, where to start. The gym had become intimidating again and I just had a hard time getting past things. While researching workout plans, nutrition logs, and everything in between, I came across a woman by the name of Karina Baymiller, who runs an online fitness and nutrition coaching business called Knox Strength and Performance. I ended up contacting her and seeing if what I was going through was something she could be of help with. We ended up connecting quite well and our journey in trying to get to to the core of my problems and restarting my weight loss journey began, very slowly I might add. Success has still not come in the form of full blown weight loss results, but I have discovered a lot more of the in-between.

The in-between is the little things. The mental road blocks, and really just discovering things about yourself that you may have pushed away, not thought of, or really did not just want to see. The first thing I did with Karina is pretty much bare all. She wanted to know as much as I was willing to give, to judge my mental state and to judge where the next logical step in my weight loss would be. And boy was I sure in deeper than I thought!

The biggest thing over the course of about 8 months that she has made me discover is my borderline unhealthy obsession with calorie counting, scale watching, and overall mental state in how I had begun to treat losing weight and eating healthy. In short, I was stagnant for many more reasons besides working out. Like I had mentioned earlier, my food tracking had got to the point that I wanted to track literally everything I ate. I was also very restrictive on what I would allow myself to eat and when. Even if I cheated, I wasn’t going to In-n-Out or eating a 1/2 dozen donuts on a Saturday. I was considering things like bagels, an ice cream cone, and little small things like that, that overall in the grand scheme would not be make or break in terms of weight loss. Truth was, I just didn’t let myself have too many cheats or anything rather blatant because I was so afraid of gaining the weight back. The breakdown for me, was seeing that I was no longer losing weight and wondering why I kept eating so healthy when it *clearly* wasn’t working.

With Karina, the plan is all about flexible dieting. There are no cheats, there are no restricted foods, but you follow a more simplistic plan of eating healthy but having that ice cream cone if you’re craving it, or having that donut on a Saturday morning if you’re feeling it. This is not to say that I should be eating a donut every morning or eating ice cream every night for dessert, but if I wanted it, sometimes I could have it. Her biggest thing in all of the many nutrition talks we have had, was the mindset shift. So what if you couldn’t track every morsel? In fact, no tracking app is ever really truly 100% accurate, so a bite of this or that, again, will not break you. My mindset needed to shift. And not see food as the bad guy, as the thing that caused me so much grief. But the big key was that I needed to switch up *what* healthy food I was eating. Chicken breast, brown rice, and broccoli is boring, let’s be real. Who the heck wants to eat that for lunch everyday for the rest of their lives? So I needed to start varying what I eat and that should bring about the hopeful lack of frustration on having to eat the same thing I was feeling. My goals were to find new things to cook and try. My biggest deterrent in most weeks throughout our time together so far has been really finding the time to accomplish any of this while in this program. When I say this Masters program kicked my butt for two years, that’s an understatement. I felt at times that I was struggling to come up for air after being stuck under water. But I’m getting off- track again.

Overall it sounds so simple, but it really wasn’t and hasn’t been. The food thing was the first step. The second step was not letting the gym control my life. The gym was to fit into my schedule, my schedule was not to fit around the gym. My social life had suffered during my initial weight loss journey, but it also suffered during my Masters tenure, both for different reasons. But I needed to find a schedule that worked. I pride myself on organization and planning, but for the life of me, I could just not get all 3 to work together like I wanted.

The next biggest thing was really just getting myself in the gym. Easier said than done. With my commute to school, I needed more time on those days to drive, which cut into my time for things like getting in the gym, or doing something else. This proved the hardest in my time with Karina so far, which I am hopeful will alleviate itself now with one less thing on my plate. I was getting randomly sick throughout last year, ended up straining my ankle quite severely, both things keeping me out of the gym more than being on a fitness program should allow. Needless to say, I never really felt like I ever settled into a consistent routine. Because my life didn’t feel consistent.

Another major thing on the food topic that Karina and I had gone back and forth with quite a bit was how much I was eating and what it consisted of. In being so restrictive of my food, I had messed up my metabolism, which was most likely a contributing factor to the lack of weight loss. What we discovered, is that I was actually not eating enough. I was not eating enough protein for starters, but surprisingly, on some days, I was not even eating enough carbs. I thought she was crazy when she set my numbers for food intake, and believe me I still struggle with it today and fought for a long while, still in the mindset that they were just too high. But after many explanations and back/forth we’ve met common ground and I see now why they are important, even though my mind sometimes says otherwise. Choosing the food to fill your day is even more important when you have specific numbers you want to meet. The great thing here, is we worked up to them slowly. We focused on one thing, then another, then another. And now we’ve got a better focus on the main protein/carb/fat ratio. It’s still not great, it’s still not complexly consistent, but I know it can be done.

Even though I was busy, there were many excuses that still held me back from actually being consistent with trying to lose weight again. And in all honesty, I think knowing how hard I would have to work, it kind of deterred me from starting sometimes. I was going through the motions, walking to the gym, doing my thing, not great, and leaving. Or skipping cardio workouts. Not eating consistently enough to be able to see changes. I just wasn’t focused enough to see many positive changes.

Flash forward to current time. I continue today with Karina, still really struggling mentally and physically to find my full groove, but now with the weight of my Masters program behind me, I am restarting the journey to a healthy body, mind, and soul. Karina has been insanely patient with my schedule and with the real lack of physical results we have been seeing. But the mental change, in many ways, as become quite different. In discovering the things I had pushed off, had been doing, and so on. She has been great at getting down to the root causes of just what I am thinking, things I am interpreting, and what the next steps would be. She calls me out when she knows I can be better. I know I can be 100% better than what product I am putting out now. I know that staying consistent for longer than a week or two will start to yield positive results and she reminds me of that constantly. I know it will not be easy. I know that I have not put even close to my best effort again into losing weight, but I know, most importantly, that it is in there to be done. I’ve done it before, and can do it again.

As I sit here and write this and think back on everything that has seemed to move so quickly yet not at the same time, I am reflective. I know I have a lot to be thankful for in my life. I have a good life, but I want it to be better. Because in the end, I know how great it feels to be free of the weight and walk around with great confidence in your accomplishments. I am sure there will be more speed bumps and road blocks along the way, but as long as I can continue to navigate around them. I am hopeful that I will find success once again. I know this journey won’t be easy, in fact, I know just how hard it is. But I know it will be worth it in the end.

For now, thank you for taking the time to read my rambling thoughts. I’m going to continue on with trying to find a job in this crazy music industry that I am so passionate about and continue my journey into the next phase of my life. And I want to invite anyone who’d like to join in this weight loss journey to hop on. Because if I haven’t learned enough, I have learned that having people around you that feel the same way and that are doing things you are doing makes all of the difference. Whether that’s going to the gym, getting out in nature on a hike, or going out for a healthy lunch/dinner with friends. That connection is so vital. Because, in the end, my weight loss journey affects the people around me, and what is going on around me, in turn, affects my journey as well.

#fitness #weightloss #fitnessjourney #nutrition

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understandingchaoss · 8 years

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Do Not Tell Me I'm Skinny When My Eating Disorder Says Otherwise

“I’m going on a diet because I’ve gained way too much weight. But that isn’t something you have to worry about.” “You’re lucky you don’t have to go to the gym.” “You’re so lucky that you can eat whatever you want without getting fat.” “You’re so skinny and I don’t understand how.”

Those are some of those common ways I am indirectly told that people are “jealous” of the way that I look. I would be lying if I said hearing those kinds of things didn’t hurt my feelings. I struggle daily with an eating disorder and my appearance. I would bet money on the fact that most of the people reading this do not know I even have such a thing.

I have what is called anorexia nervosa binge eating-purging type. There are three different disorders in that one diagnosis, and most people know what each one means individually; but what about combined?

The problem is that when most people picture what anorexia looks like, they picture a girl in the hospital, weighing less than 80 pounds who is on her death bed because she never eats. Most people picture binge eating as some overweight 50 year old woman, lying on her couch eating potato chips all day, while the working class pays for her to do so. Purging isn’t as commonly known, but for those who have heard of it, most picture it as a girl hurling her lunch into the toilet because she didn’t want to allow her body to retain its nutrients, after all, that would mean she would gain weight.

I have spent years fighting with the voice in my head that screams much too loud for my liking. My eating disorder is what I like to call my inner demon. It convinces me that I have gained too much weight and now have to pull out my “fat pants” because I went up a whole pant size after a bingeing episode. It convinces me that the only solution to losing any of that weight is to starve myself. The voice sounds horribly familiar. Maybe even my own? I’m never able to distinguish. Whatever and whoever it is, it brainwashes me into thinking I’m not good enough, and that I certainly don’t look good enough to the outside world.

Before we go any further, I’m going to set a few things straight.

First of all, all of those stereotypes are all wrong. Second of all, science is a fascinating thing, so I’m going to throw in a little education session.

Any and all eating disorders can affect anyone of any age, size, and gender. Men, women, children, and the elderly can all battle eating disorders.

Anorexia nervosa - contrary to popular belief - is actually not the most common eating disorder in America. For some reason though, it is the most glorified. It does, however, have the highest mortality rate of any other eating disorder. If you were to google it, the direct definition is: a lack or loss of appetite for food. This is where most people like to do what’s called a self-diagnosis. Except following that definition, it states as a medical condition. A medical condition is a medical condition only by diagnosis done by a medical/mental health professional, not self-diagnosis (so if you believe you may be having symptoms, see a medical/mental health professional for evaluation). With anorexia, the body is denied the essential nutrients it needs in order to function properly. As a result, the body is forced to slow down all of its processes and conserve whatever energy it may have left. The “slowing down” state can have serious medical consequences such as:

Abnormally slow heart rate and low blood pressure, which mean that the heart muscle is changing. The risk for heart failure rises as heart rate and blood pressure levels sink lower and lower.

Reduction of bone density (osteoporosis), which results in dry, brittle bones.

Muscle loss and weakness.

Severe dehydration, which can result in kidney failure.

Fainting, fatigue, and overall weakness.

Dry hair and skin, hair loss is common.

Growth of a downy layer of hair called lanugo all over the body, including the face, in an effort to keep the body warm.

Just because someone has anorexia, does not mean that they will end up in treatment, will die from it, or will look like the typical stereotype. It is rare, but not completely unheard of for children under the age of 10 to develop anorexia. It can also be present in adults of any age, sometimes being present until the day that they die of natural causes unrelated to the eating disorder – if the eating disorder does not claim them first.

The following symptoms must be present for a potential diagnosis.

Inadequate food intake leading to a weight that is clearly too low.

Intense fear of weight gain, obsession with weight and persistent behavior to prevent weight gain.

Self-esteem overly related to body image.

Inability to appreciate the severity of the situation.

Obsessive counting of calories/compulsive exercising (does not need to be present for diagnosis, but is very common in extreme/severe cases)

Binge eating is actually the most common eating disorder in America weighing in at 2.8% of all American’s. Binge eating directly translates to: the consumption of large quantities of food in a short period of time; recurrent episodes of eating large quantities of food (often very quickly and to the point of discomfort); feelings of loss or control during the episode. Binge eating usually takes place as a way for an individual to use food as a way to cope with or block out feelings and emotions that they do not want to feel. Individuals can also use food as a way to numb themselves, to cope with daily life stressors, to provide comfort to themselves, or to fill a feeling of worthlessness they feel within. A person struggling with binge eating will typically have a depressive episode following the bingeing episode, which usually consists of having feelings of shame, distress, or guilt. The following symptoms must be present for a potential diagnosis:

Eating, in a discrete period of time (e.g., within any 2-hour period), an amount of food that is definitely larger than what most people would eat in a similar period of time under similar circumstances.

A sense of lack of control over eating during the episode (e.g., a feeling that one cannot stop eating or control what or how much one is eating)

Marked distress regarding binge eating is present

The binge eating occurs, on average, at least once a week for 3 months

The binge eating is not associated with the recurrent use of inappropriate compensatory behaviors (e.g., purging) as in bulimia nervosa and does not occur exclusively during the course of bulimia nervosa or anorexia nervosa (I will address how my diagnosed eating disorder is possible with this as a symptom of binge eating shortly)

Binge eating episodes must have three or more of the following for a potential diagnosis:

Eating much more rapidly than normal.

Eating until feeling uncomfortably full.

Eating large amounts of food when not feeling physically hungry.

Eating alone because of feeling embarrassed by how much one is eating.

Feeling disgusted with oneself, depressed, or very guilty afterward.

Purging type is most often associated with bulimia, because a form of purging is self-induced vomiting. However, purging can also consist of the sudden restriction of food, engaging in abuse of laxatives, diuretics, or enemas after a period of bingeing. An individual can have purging type without having bulimia.

How is anorexia nervosa binge eating-purging type even possible then? That was the question I kept asking when the therapist I was seeing during my four years of high school informed me that I fit the criteria. I did months’ worth of research. Unfortunately, there is not a lot of information available for such an eating disorder as it is classified under an Eating Disorder(s) Not Otherwise Specified (EDNOS) because of the fact that there are only certain symptoms from each disorder’s criteria found in other eating disorders. This means that I might only have two symptoms from one disorder’s criteria, but four from another, and only one from another. EDNOS was designed for such cases. From what I could find, I learned that it is most commonly associated with trauma. My eating disorder started out as frequent binge eating. I remember wanting to literally eat everything in sight. I wanted anything that consisted of carbs, fats, and sugars. As a result, I gained an immense amount of weight in a very short period of time. At that time, I had always weighed between 120 pounds and 138 pounds. So when I suddenly gained enough weight to shoot me up into the 200s, I felt disgusting. I was mad at myself for gaining that much weight, and allowing it. I was mad at myself for using food as a way to cope. So instead of putting myself on a healthy diet, I just flat out stopped eating. Most days, all I would have was an apple when I woke up and a small meal for dinner. I did that only because I was on medications that required food intake before the dosage. My bingeing episodes would last for months at a time, and my purging episodes would last for months at a time, which is why the three are able to occur at different times, but still simultaneously exist in the same diagnosis. According to my previous therapist, this type of eating disorder is extremely harmful to the body. Of course, all eating disorders are. But she informed me that I was literally putting my body through shock and trauma. Just as my brain was in shock as a result of the trauma, I was doing the same exact thing to my body. Anorexia/purging can slow down your heart rate, lower your blood pressure, and lower your cholesterol; while binge eating can speed up your heart rate, raise your blood pressure, and raise your cholesterol. By alternating back and forth between the two very suddenly, the body can go into a state of shock.

Now, why do I not want to be praised for the way that I look when I go through a period of purging?

Imagine that you suffer from a series of mental illnesses, but one in particular is the only one that can, possibly, directly kill you, and yet you are receiving praise for the very symptoms that are destroying your mind and body. I am literally being praised for destroying my body. I am being praised for restricting my food intake for one period of time, and eating much more than I should for another period of time. I am being praised for harming myself.

So yes, gaining weight is something I have to worry about. No, I am not lucky I don’t have to go to the gym because I’m basically destroying my mind and body while you’re doing it the right way. No, I am not lucky I can eat whatever I want without getting fat, because I can definitely gain more weight at a faster rate than most. I am skinny because of an eating disorder, that’s how. I do not recommend it.

The only reason the majority of people around me do not know that I have an eating disorder, is because most people who binge and then purge, do not look unhealthy or underweight. But believe me when I say that I know exactly when I’ve gained weight. I don’t even have to step on the scale. I know when I’ve gained even three pounds; because I can see it. My eating disorder warps my perception of myself in order to be convinced that I am much too fat and I need to lose some weight. I don’t go from 80 pounds to 200 pounds overnight, so most people don’t believe me when I say that I used to weigh over 200 pounds. However, if you put pictures side by side of my different weight fluctuations over different periods of time, you would most definitely be able to see a difference.

Contrary to popular belief, eating disorders are actually not a choice. They are complex illnesses with biological, psychological, and environmental causes. They are in fact classified as a mental illness. I know that no one forced this disorder upon me. So if no one did, what did? That voice inside my head tells me that I brought it upon myself. In fact, it screams at me that I’m to blame. But no one person or thing is to blame for my eating disorder, including myself. It is a combination of neurobiology, family of origin, social and societal environments, and trauma. Depression almost always goes hand in hand. When you have depression, you lack the psychological means to deal with life stressors. As a result, your brain seeks a way to find relief in any way that it can.

Years later, and I still struggle with my eating disorder. I still fluctuate in weight frequently. But I am not responsible for the onset of my eating disorder. But I am responsible for my recovery and freedom from it. I must forgive myself for developing the eating disorder. I must forgive my brain for not being able to cope with the stress of life and the trauma I have endured. My eating disorder is an outward manifestation of inward confusion, anxiety, and distress. In order to find freedom, I must first deal with what it was that caused that confusion, anxiety, and distress. It becomes difficult to do so when I am being praised for destroying myself. It causes more confusion and anxiety within my head, thus causing me distress and to take several steps backwards.

I did not choose my eating disorder. My eating disorder chose me. But I can choose recovery from it, and I can choose to find freedom from it. Do not praise me for my illness. Do not praise me for hurting myself. Do not praise me for expressing my confusion, anxiety, and distress in an unhealthy manner. In fact, I don’t want any praise at all, because in the end, the glory and praise isn’t given to me. But if you must praise me for my courage or strength, or whatever it is you’d like to praise me for, praise me for my choice of recovery and the courage and strength it took to make that decision. Because at the end of the day and at the end of the road of my battle with my eating disorder, my choice of recovery is the only choice that will ever matter.

If you or someone you know is struggle with an eating disorder - or you suspect that they may be struggling with one - and needs support right now, please contact the National Eating Disorders Association at 1-800-931-2237 or text NEDA to 741741

If you or someone you know needs support right now, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, or text START to 741-741

#understandingchaos

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ecotone99 · 5 years

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[TH] Psycho

Due to circumstances outside of my control, I decided to move across the country. I left everything I had ever known behind. I don’t know if I’m happy about it, or if it’s going to work, but I know it is better than staying in New York. I’m getting ahead of myself however; I must go back to the beginning.

I had originally fallen into quite the routine to mange my stressors. I would wake up each morning at precisely 4:30am, from that time I would allow myself 30 minutes to shower, brush my teeth, get dressed, and brew my morning coffee while scarfing down a protein bar. I would then drive to the gym, arriving at precisely 5:30am each morning. From there I would spend 15 minutes stretching, utilizing bands and other implements to ensure that my body was prepared for my workout. Then I would spend an additional 10 minutes doing something to raise my heart rate, doing anything from jogging to light sled pulls. From there, I would spend the next five minutes warming up for whatever muscle group I planned on targeting that day. The time was then 6:00am and I would begin my workout. My workout would continue until 6:50am, at which time I would rush to shower and exit the gym in my suit by 7:00am.

I would then drive to a local diner a few minutes from my office, and order the same thing each day: A sausage, egg, and cheese sandwich with an extra egg and hash browns. Although slightly heavier than I would have liked, this meal allowed me to remain satiated until lunchtime. I would sip on coffee while reading the morning news upon my tablet, preparing myself for the day ahead. At 8:00am I would pay my bill, leaving the same tip each day, as It was customary that I would also receive the same waitress each day, who ensured that my coffee remained full, but not refilled too early, as that would ruin the ratio of coffee to creamer in my cup. She also reminded the cook that my eggs needed to be just slightly runny, and my hash browns crispy each morning. In fact, if she were to be off one morning, she would be sure to let me know so that I could make other arrangements. On those days she was absent, I would wake up 30 minutes earlier and arrive and leave the gym 30 minutes ahead of schedule to allow myself to run home and prepare my own breakfast before going in to work. I did not like to leave my meals to chance, because the times that my routine has been interrupted have been… unpleasant.

I would then drive to the office, arriving to my desk at precisely 8:30am. This is when my day would truly start. I would spend the next hour poring over the pre market transactions, attempting to glean anything I did not yet know about the securities which I was interested in or held positions in. Once the markets opened at precisely 9:30am, as they did every morning, I would begin making the trades that I had been planning in my head since I had left the office the night before. This would continue until 12:30pm, when I would rise from my desk and go across the street for lunch, again, ordering the same tuna steak and side of wild rice each day, with a large glass of sweet tea. There were two different hostesses that could be working this particular shift, depending on the day. I had trained, for lack of a better word, each of them to provide me the level of service I required to maintain my routine. Like my waitress at breakfast, they would ensure my glass remained full, and my meal properly cooked. They didn’t run quality control, per se, as it wasn’t their job, but they always let the chef know I was there, and reminded them of my discerning taste.

By 1:15 this meal would by over, and I would return to my desk for the remainder of the day. I would continue trading and going through research my team had prepared until 4:30pm when the markets closed. At this point, my preparation for the next day would begin. From 4:30pm until 6:00pm I would look over the rest of the research my team had prepared, do a little bit of my own, and develop a plan for the next day. At 6:00pm, I would drive home, shower, change into evening clothes, and cook myself dinner.

My dinner would be the only meal that was variable. It could be anything as simple as a cheeseburger, to something as elaborate as a sushi spread with some sort of exotic ramen I would prepare myself. Cooking gave me an opportunity to leave the analytical side of myself behind. Cooking was an art, something that I could deviate from the recipes that I was following in order to create an end result that I would be satisfied with. I didn’t prescribe myself a set time to complete this meal, due to the varying complexities of my dishes. If I needed to create something exceptionally difficult the next day, I would then begin any necessary prep work to ensure that meal would go smoothly. After this point, I would allow myself an hour of leisure, something like video games or Netflix, again, an escape from my analytical mindset. By 9:00 however, my day would be complete. I would then walk to my bed, and head off to sleep.

Each day had carried on in this template for years. I was content, and the rigidity of my schedule had allowed me to keep the anger that resided inside me under control. What my peers didn’t know about me is that it is extremely difficult for me to handle deviances from my sense of routine and normality. It is a condition that I do not truly understand. What I do know is that there is an inherent anger and violence to the way I perceive and react to the world. This is perhaps the price I must pay for my great analytical skills and intense discipline.

That is, until these urges became far too strong and I was able to resist them no longer. There came a day, that I let myself become consumed in them, and would do something that I wish I could say I regret. It began when I arrived to the gym, which was typically empty and somehow each piece of equipment, dumbbell, or rack I needed would be occupied by someone who had no idea what they were doing, frustrating me even more. Then my waitress at the diner was gone, and her replacement did an extremely subpar job in ensuring the quality of my meal. I was frustrated that my waitress had not warned me beforehand. . I kept the urges inside, but they began to pile up. The markets were crashing that day, something that many times before I had been able to predict, but today I lost vast amounts of money due to my error and the irrationality of the day’s events. I began to unravel, but was able to convince myself that any reaction was not worth it until lunch.

I ordered my tuna steak each day seared, with a crusted outside that contained seasoning, and a center that was raw but slightly warm, so as not to be jarring to my pallet against the hot outside. After waiting much longer than usual, the steak came out well done, ruining the cut of fish. That was when I could take these mistakes no more. I rose from my table and walked towards the kitchen to find the chef who had cooked my meal. It was a younger chef than I had typically seen working, but that made the mistake no more acceptable. It was clear that he had no respect for his clients, especially one important enough for the hostesses to warn him about. I then returned to the office, biding my time until the restaurant would close. The chaos around me as the markets continued to crash felt like a blur, I no longer cared and my analytical mind was no more. All I felt was an insurmountable rage that I had been able to keep deep inside for so long.

At precisely 9:00pm, the restaurant would close, as it did everyday. At 8:45, I rose from my desk and waited in the lobby of my building, waiting for the chef to exit. It took him 27 minutes after the 9:00pm closing time to exit the restaurant. I began to follow him home, waiting until he was in a back alley when I called out to him.

“How hard is it to follow simple instructions?” I ask him.

“What the hell are you talking about?” He retorts, clearly not recognizing me.

“My tuna steak. I order the same thing every single day. Every day my steak is ordered seared and yet you manage to mess it up, even after being reminded by the hostess and the ticket from the waitress.”

“Dude are you kidding me, you seriously are following me to bitch about your lunch being overcooked? Fuck off.”

“And now you’re going to disrespect me, after I gave you the chance to apologize or at least some justification for your actions?”

“Bro, it’s your lunch. It’s a piece of fish for Christ’s sake, if it’s that big of a deal to you you should have complained earlier and got the meal comped.”

“I think it should be clear that money is not my motivation for this. This is about respect and doing your job. This is about ruining my routine.”

“Your routine? What the hell are you talking about? You’re out of your mind.”

At that, he turned to jog away. But I couldn’t let this exchange go unpunished, so I began to chase after him. I didn’t know what I was going to do until I tackled him and felt the folding knife I keep in my jacket pocket press against my ribs. I reached into my coat, pulled it out, and began stabbing the chef in the back of the neck. I stood up, astonished at what I had done, but not necessarily regretful of it. It felt so good to release the anger I had been bottling up for so long. Once he had finally stopped his pitiful writhing on the ground, I hoisted his body into a dumpster, returned to my car, and drove home.

Once home, I cooked the dinner I had prepared the night before, and enjoyed the fact that it was properly cooked. The anger and bloodlust were still within me, and I left the steak even more rare than I typically would, letting the juice drip down my face as I ate. It was at this moment that I knew I must leave. I could no longer control what was within me, and if I wanted to continue living in comfort, I must go.

That night I packed all the items I thought I would require in this new life, and in the morning, after allowing myself to sleep in, something I never did, I walked to the bank and withdrew everything from my accounts in cash. I then drove to the dumpster I had left the chef in, and put the body in my passenger seat. On the drive to the river, I pulled each of his teeth and disfigured his face, so that he may be mistaken for myself if he were ever found. I then let the car roll into the river, and walked back to a main road to hail a cab to take me to the airport.

I flew to Colorado and purchased an isolated, but grand home to live out the remainder of my days, attempting to isolate myself from anything that I could lash out on. I was no longer the analytical, regimented freak I had been for much of my life, but I had become something far worse. I realized I didn’t care what the consequences for that release I had experienced through that killing were, I realized that the clarity it allowed me to feel was too good not to experience again.

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taoteacher · 6 years

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The obstacles to health and wellness - the ACE Agenda.

Letting go of the ACE Agenda – The Avoidance, Control and Escape agenda that keeps us stuck in patterns of unhealthy eating, lack of adequate exercise, and other dysfunctional patterns of behavior.

We sometimes avoid, control and escape from things or activities that could be or are good for us, or at least benefit us in achieving our goal of living the life that we would want to live, while being more fully being present to the ones that we love, as well as, looking better to ourselves in the mirror, and living a longer, more healthy lifestyle.

Avoidance

We avoid things that are stressful. For some people, crowds and interacting with others can be highly stressful, especially if you have problems with anxiety. We avoid things that are a chore or require sustained effort. Examples may include cooking healthy meals, working out or doing exercise, and sticking to healthy routines or regimens, often simply because we are “too tired” or “don’t have enough time” or “don’t feel up to it today”. The short-term reward is that we don’t have to face the time, energy, and especially the stress of going outside our comfort zone.

Control

We control. Why not? Who likes to not be in control. However, we often think we can control things that are beyond our control. We read books, see therapists and listen to motivational speakers in order to learn to control our thoughts. We also try to control our feelings through many of the above strategies – and sometimes we are successful, at least for the time being.

Something that I have learned from my many years of being a therapist is this amazing fact, and it goes against popular belief and most popular forms of psychology:

We often can not control what pops into our head - our thoughts, which are often self-defeating.

We may have some ability to change our thoughts or redirect them to more healthy or beneficial ways of thinking. However, despite what many may tell you and despite what the many self-help books profess, we can’t always stop what comes into our head, and most (if not all of us), will continue to have self-critical and misleading thoughts, even if we work with the best of therapists. Simply put, although our mind can be helpful, it can also convince us of majorly limiting things such as, that we are “not good enough”, as well as convince us not to engage in healthy behaviors and elect to do something comforting instead (i.e. to eat the dessert because it makes us feel better).

Escape

Which brings me to the next part of the ACE agenda, which is to escape from discomfort. We may come home from work and escape into our favorite sitcom or TV show. We gravitate towards escaping from unwanted feelings. Some turn to booze and drugs. Some of us turn to food. Some of us isolate. Some of us take very few risks.

When we have stressors in our lives, it makes it hard for us to consider doing exercise and things that seem like more work, more stress. It is natural for us to want to escape.

So, is it wrong to occasionally avoid, escape or control? No, not always, as the ACE agenda appears to be human nature. However, avoidance, control, and escape to levels that prevent us from growth or keep us from activities that would enrich our lives is not beneficial to us in the long run. When the actions that we choose (or the passive inaction such as avoiding family activities, exercise, and other healthy lifestyle activities) is damaging to ourselves or to those whom we care about, it is time to practice letting go of the ACE agenda!

Another way of putting it is, when we rigidly stick to this easy rut of avoidance, control, and escape (the ACE agenda), this brings us further from the kind of life that we want to live and away from meaningful activities. By avoiding exercise and choosing the donut, most of us get further away from the kind of life that we want to live, we put our health in jeopardy, and we end up feeling worse. We have made a choice for short term gain of good feelings (or at least escape/avoidance of discomfort) in favor of longer term pain.

How do we practice this “letting go of the ACE agenda”?

Try to get beyond the ACE agenda. One important key is to go outside our comfort zone and to establish new and healthy patterns of behaving. Keep in mind that these new healthy patterns will be stressful at first, and will probably feel foreign to what we are used to.

Another important key is to not set yourself up for failure, by instead setting achievable and realistic goals. When I hear that “everyone can look like a supermodel”, it makes me cringe. I also cringe when I hear dangerous propositions from fitness TV shows and advertisements from weight loss “experts” which push us to “Lose 50 lbs in 30 days”. Not only can overreaching or going too fast and too hard then set us up for failure, or even cause injury, it can also lead us away from other important aspects of our lives. We do have to balance work, family, and other obligations with the challenges of becoming fit. Furthermore, genetic predisposition is not an excuse, but a real issue. Not everyone puts on muscle easily, nor loses weight quickly. Plus, what you don’t hear about is how many of these perfect looking models, actors/actresses, sports stars, and how many of the fitness poster-people cheat with dangerous chemicals, steroids, and how they practically starve themselves, in order to sustain their careers or notoriety.

However, by committing yourself to do realistically and in a healthy manner extend and gently extend yourself outside your comfort zone, by actions such as working out (even when you don’t feel like it), and by choosing healthy, fresh nutritional options over boxed meals, you will most likely find over time that you can look better, feel better, and perform better! Even if you don’t achieve the exact look of your favorite athlete, supermodel, or champion bodybuilder, you can still certainly surprise yourself and others around you! Therefore, the third key is a commitment - to keep yourself on the fitness journey and to not give up. In other words, we need to “get fit and don’t quit”.

Finally, the last key is to remember to not let our self-defeating thoughts get in the way of our goals. We may not be able to stop dysfunctional thoughts from popping into our head, but we don’t always have to buy into them, nor obey our mind. “You don’t need to exercise today, you are too tired”. “You will never look good no matter how hard you try”. “The gym will be too crowded, you can just workout tomorrow or this weekend”. “Ice cream sure sounds good right now! You need some!” Most of our self-defeating thoughts are complete bullcrap. Even if there is truth to some of these self-defeating thoughts, we can choose to recognize that our mind is just throwing its usual self-doubt, insecurities, and obstacles at us and we can take action despite these and do what is healthy. We learn to follow our commitment to health and learn to tune out the negative chatterbox in our head.

I know that it is much easier said than done. Yet, to have a fighting chance to change, we need to be aware of our trap - of how our mind tricks us into the ACE agenda. Then we follow the keys of willingness to going outside our comfort zone, to then set realistic/achievable goals, next to commit ourselves to this new regimen - to do something even when, and especially when, we don’t feel up to it, and finally to not allow our own mind to get in the way. Our mind is not our enemy, but it is not always the helpful supportive friend either.

In summary, the ACE agenda:

Avoidance

Control

Escape

The keys to practice a lifestyle of letting go of the ACE agenda:

Go outside your comfort zone and do new, healthy activities and do things that improve your health, social life, self-esteem, and relationships with others.

Set realistic and achievable goals that will help you, in the long run, to feel better, look better, and perform better.

Commitment to your new healthy lifestyle. Force yourself to go even when you don't feel up to it, and stick to your new way of living. If you go off track, get back on track immediately.

Don’t let obstacles get in your way, especially your own mind and the self-defeating thoughts which may lead you away from healthy activities.

Good luck on your wellness journey!

- Coach Chris

____________________________

"Coach" Chris L McClish, MS, LCP, CFT

Chris L McClish has worked for over many years in the field of mental health as a licensed clinical psychotherapist. He also has been an author, supervisor, mentor, and Judo/Jujitsu coach.

This article first appeared on CoachCMC.com.

#taoism #taoists #taoist #taoteacher #mindfulness #meditation #ace agenda #letitgo #letting go #health #fitness #wellness #eastern philosophy #eastern psychology

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atakportal · 6 years

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Description:

DISCOVERED: NEW “Morning Metabolism Detox Drink” Melts Fat

Do This 9-Second “Cinnamon Cider” Trick BEFORE Breakfast to Burn 1.2lbs Daily and Flatten Your Belly Fast WITHOUT Starving Yourself or Exhaustive Exercise

And Yet 99% of So-Called Weight Loss “Experts” Have NEVER Heard of This Morning Detox Trick That Flushes Fat-Trapping Toxins to Burn More Belly Fat…

…Did you know that there’s a liquid DEEP in your belly that’s stopping you from losing weight?

It’s this strange hormone EVERYONE has that controls whether or not you’re burning fat or storing it.

Ever wonder how some men and women can lose 5, 10, or even 20 plus pounds of pure fat…

Meanwhile, you’re struggling through all these painful workouts and diet strategies…

and STILL holding on to that belly fat you can grab with two hands.

Leaving you depressed, insecure, and ready to quit – Again…

You might think they’re genetically gifted, or simply had it easy…

However the real truth is, that there’s one Master Fat Loss Hormone that is the key to burning fat, 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.

Even better, you can naturally control this hormone, so that you shut it off, and turn it on when you need to so that you can control your own fat-burning metabolism.

Today you’re going to discover why it’s so difficult for today’s men and women over 35 to lose unwanted belly fat…

And how to stop a belly that seems to get bigger and puffier, year after year.

And more importantly, today you’ll learn how YOU can use this new breakthrough method that men and women over 35 are using to burn unwanted body fat – fast

Especially from the bum, belly and thighs…

In-fact, this powerful, yet simple strategy takes just 9-seconds to perform and forces your body to STOP storing fat and burn it off for energy instead…

You’ll also discover how many of today’s sexy Hollywood stars in the industry are strategically cheating on their diets 2-3 times per week, and NOT feeling guilty about it…

…or gaining a single pound of unwanted belly fat.

You see, the secret is…

“Your Metabolism is simply NOT the same as when you were in your early 20’s…”

And dieting, working out more, and doing these crazy high intensity exercises you see all over are making it even HARDER to burn belly fat…

All because of a strange “stress hormone” in your body that forces you to pile on more fat the MORE you exercise.

You can flatten your belly FASTER than you ever imagined possible by using this simple 9-second “cinnamon cider” trick before breakfast…

You can literally stop storing body fat as early as tomorrow morning and stop having your body work against you.

All you have to do is simply SHUT OFF this hormone.

However, before we get to that

This Looks Like a Healthy Start To The Day Right?

This is a bowl of cereal with cow’s milk, and an apple…

Think it’s great for keeping belly fat off?

In fact, most people think this is a perfect breakfast if you’re the average working Mom or Dad…

However, the truth is this breakfast is full of fat-storing sugars and empty carbs that make it nearly impossible to burn belly fat before you even get started with your day.

Now Listen, for any of these breakthrough strategies to work, you need to have a full understanding of the ONE Master Fat Loss Hormone that controls fat burning.

This will all make so much more sense.

For decades it’s almost like we’ve been lied to and told to eat these “BALANCED MEALS” to support a healthy diet…

When in fact, they’re ruining your metabolism and making your body more resistant to fat burning all-day-long.

Leaving you tired, lethargic, and forcing your body to store more and more fat around your belly – day after day.

When it comes to it, you’re almost better off eating no breakfast at all and forcing your body to use fat for fuel.

This is all because of a cascade of hormonal issues that are happening in your body…

That are telling your body to STOP burning fat for fuel.

After visiting this topic with the members of my gym and the thousands of private clients we’ve had over the last 18 years…

I’ve made some very important discoveries along the way that have helped these men and women lose pounds of frustrating fat in just weeks.

The problem is that there’s just ONE thing that’s holding you back…

And it’s probably simpler than you think…

But the reality is that your ongoing efforts may be making this worse, day by day.

Now matter how hard you try.

Now matter how consistent you are.

Most Weight Loss “Experts” Have it Completely WRONG When It Comes to Burning Belly Fat after 40

You don’t need to starve yourself or count calories…

You don’t need to give up your favorite foods forever…

And you definitely don’t need to do those crazy Crossfit workouts that ruin your joints and kill your knees and back…

You’re about to discover a brand NEW fat-burning formula that works for ANYONE at ANY age in ANY physical condition by doing a few simple fat-burning “food tricks” that melt away every last ounce of frustrating fat from your body no matter how much you have to lose.

Regular Dieting and Exercise Does NOT Work for Women and Men Over 40…Instead You Should Eat MORE and Exercise LESS

The truth is when it comes to burning fat and losing weight, traditional exercise does NOT work as you get older…

How many times have you seen the same people running on the treadmill day after day, week after week, month after month at the gym and yet their body ALWAYS looks the same…

And don’t get me started on all the “low-fat” diet foods and eating rice cakes and bland tasting meals like chicken and broccoli every night for dinner….

You’re depriving yourself of the foods you love and if you’re miserable all the time your body picks up on it and holds onto every last ounce of stubborn fat instead of burning it off…

You see, you the key to get the flat and firm belly you desire is eating MORE of the right fat-burning foods that taste delicious so you’ll never feel hungry for a single second…

And exercising LESS because the constant pounding your body takes with most of the popular workouts today does way more harm than good.

In fact you can turn on your body’s #1 super fat-burning hormone that can flow throughout your body all day long burning up fat for fuel with just a few simple movements that ANYONE can do…

But before we get to that, I have to tell you…

You Must Absolutely AVOID These 3 Fat-Storing Signals That Only Pile ON Belly Fat Faster than Ever No Matter How Healthy You Eat or How Much You Exercise…

Listen: I was so convinced with all the hype back in the late 90’s that high protein diets were “the” way to go if you wanted to have a lean body. And maybe you’ve been brainwashed into some of these ridiculous myths too.

Do you recognize any of these?

These are just a few of the flat out lies that circulate the fitness and health industry, but the reality is that they’re DEAD WRONG.

You can simply avoid these high-protein, low-carb diets by taking in the 9-second “cinnamon cider” drink so that you can still enjoy your favorite foods while helping you:

Want to lose a pound of fat? Just cut your calories by 3500, right?

How about 10 pounds, that’s 35,000 calories you’ll have to cut this month…

It must be the EASIEST fat loss math in the world, BUT…

Unfortunately, these drastic cuts in calories force your body to fight back against your dieting efforts, making your metabolism shut down and go into starvation mode.

Then your body starts to actually hold on to stubborn fat – NOT good.

Here’s the MAJOR problems with simply cutting calories:

When you combine metabolism boosting tricks like I’m going to share with you today, you’ll find your body actually NEEDS MORE CALORIES so that you can have your perfect body and that wonderful state of feeling slim, strong, sexy, active and full of energy.

Watching people count their “calories burned” with how many steps they’ve taken using these gimmicky devices and then being so proud of how many calories they’ve burned on the treadmill is well… a waste your time, money and efforts.

Exercising more does NOT mean you’ll burn more fat…

Have you ever wondered why you still can’t get rid of your belly even though you’re constantly active and exercise all the time?

Well, if you’re one of those people that exercise regularly and you feel like you eat “healthy enough” yet you can’t seem to get rid of your stubborn belly fat…it may be that you’re simply doing too much.

Your body has an amazing capacity to adapt, which is what makes your body so resilient.

BUT, if you keep demanding TOO MUCH from your body, without the proper rest and recovery, it will start to compromise and compensate in an effort to keep functioning…

Especially after the age of 40 when your body chemistry isn’t as strong and plentiful like your early 20’s when you could eat whatever, party, wake up and still go to work the next day…

Your stubborn body fat…especially belly fat…is just one of the ways in which your body compensates when exposed to too much stressors. Ie. too much exercise.

Short, intense bouts of exercise that use specific movement patterns will produce more calories burned – in less time.

This produces more fat burning hormones to be produced like norepinephrine (natural adrenaline), while keeping stress hormones like cortisol under control.

The real problem is that your body hates crash diets and being stressed from excessive activity that’s doing more harm than good and requires huge sacrifice…

…and the results don’t even come close to warranting the massive efforts.

All These Lies From Doctors and the Media Has Left You Feeling Sick and Tired With A Ruined Metabolism And Belly That Keeps Getting Bigger and Bigger, Year after Year…

I know this can be very frustrating as there is so much misleading information out there in the media these days with gurus and so-called trainers taking your money for a quick buck.

But you must understand two things:

It’s simply that have NOT been told about the most important factors that are holding you back, and working AGAINST your system that are preventing you from burning fat instead of storing it on your belly…

…However, today you can have the sense of hope again as you’ll finally discover…

The 9-Second “Cinnamon Cider” Miracle Drink HACKS Your Fat Storing Hormone, and Ignites Your Metabolism Into Overdrive, Giving You A Flatter Belly and Firmer Body, Regardless Of Your Age Or How Much Weight You Have To lose

All you have to do is this NEW 9-second “cinnamon cider” trick first thing in the morning to flatten your belly faster than you ever imagined possible…

While most experts would have you believe that in order to find your firm belly underneath that layer of fat, you need to slash the calories, stop eating fruit, sugar, stay away from gluten, have no carbs after dinner, and pop some crazy diet pills…

Really? Is that the best answer for you and “everyone” else…

It will NEVER work long term – trust me.

It simply make you miserable and no fun to be around…

And that’ no way to live life.

The truth is, your Master Carb Hormone is what’s killing your fat loss results and all you need to do is turn it OFF so that you can finally get the flat and firm belly you desire and deserve with this simple morning trick that ANYONE can do.

Just Like Renee Who Lost 4 Pounds In 11 Days and Started Feeling Better and Waking Up Leaner Immediately.

Renee is 57 years old! I know. She looks amazing now. “I’m still amazed that, that at my age I was able to defy the odds of getting into photo shoot shape like I was in my 20’s in such little time…

My belly had completely transformed, and my love handles were completely gone after just weeks…

And I have so much energy and vitality going into my 60’s”

Start Melting Away Pounds Of Fatty Flesh From Your Belly in Just Days From Now And Realize That You Can Start Owning Your Health and Happiness With A Very Simple Approach That…

Controls Your Carb Storing and Waste Expanding Hormone Without Spending Hours On The Treadmill.

ANYONE, Can Significantly Flatten Their Belly, Improve Health, and Increase Energy.

Literally STOP Fat Storage and Melt Away Excess Fat, Week After Week Without Fail.

So What Exactly Is This Flat Belly Solution That’s Helping Women and Men Turn OFF Their “Master Carb Hormone” and Quickly See and Feel Noticeable Changes Within Just Days?

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So why is Lean Belly Metabolizer the fastest and most fail proof way of gaining control over your Master Carb Hormone and stripping off body fat, without doing long workouts, popping diet pills and and crash diets?

It’s because you “hack” your most powerful hormone to dramatically improve your insulin sensitivity and blood sugar management, while being able to eat and enjoy your most delicious and satisfying carbohydrates as you lose weight and get healthy fast…

You see, after 40, for those who choose to not deal with blood sugar and insulin sensitivity issues become statistics of:

Regardless Of Your Age Or Gender You Can End Your Struggle With Insulin Resistance and Carbohydrate Intolerance For Good, While Experiencing The Newfound Excitement Of Finally Revealing A Thinner Waist, Flatter Stomach And More Defined Body When You Look In The Mirror Each Day.

All You Need To Do Is One Simple Trick Before You Eat To Start Looking And Feeling Amazing In Just Days That:

Who Am I and How Did I Discover This NEW Fat-Burning Formula For ANYONE Over 40?

I seem to be “that guy” that all my gym members, friends and family members seem to recommend when someone they know is in some type of health and fitness crisis…

And I truly appreciate their warm trust in me… But what I’ve realized is that people need the straight up answers that are going to make for change NOW.

Nobody wants to wait weeks or even months just to lose a few pounds…

So, when I get a hold of people, and shake them with my tips and tricks that have them seeing results in just days, and feeling like a rockstar after learning just a few golden nuggets, it’s no wonder people keep going instead of waiting ‘till Monday to “try again”.

I like to get the train moving and keep it going full steam ahead, just like I did with Mindi…

“I highly recommend doing Matt’s program, not only to obtain your goals, but also to acquire the knowledge you can use to maintain a healthy lifestyle for the rest of your life.”

How A Trip To Ecuador To Visit My Wife’s 99 Year Old Grandma Led To The Shocking Discovery Of These Odd Flat Belly Secrets And Carb Fighting Ingredients

Back in 2015 I took a trip to Ecuador with my wife for a solid month to visit her family and most importantly her 98 year old Grandma who lived in a small village, Giron…

Talk about a warm, peaceful and beautiful place up in the mountains.

On the first day visiting, we arrived early in the morning before breakfast only to find Nubbia’s Grandma, who lives all by herself, waiting patiently for us to arrive.

She had fresh ground coffee brewing (ground from her own coffee tree’s) for us while she sat there drinking a tea of some sort before we ate…

I noticed her counter top had what appeared to be several herbs, plants and cinnamon bark that she had ground up…

My wife pointed out, to my curiosity, what her Grandma had used all those ingredients for…

That’s what she made her tea with…

Now, back in North America, we’re all used to everything bagged, pre-packaged, and done-for-you.

This whole scene in her Grandma’s home was so foreign to me, but so interesting.

So I asked, “what does she drink that tea blend for?”

My wife asked her Grandma…

She replied in Spanish as she was putting a whopping tablespoon of fresh sugar, straight from the growing sugar plantations just a few miles away….

“This tea keeps me young and allows me to have the sweetness in my life that I enjoy so much…”

I Felt Like I Had Stumbled Upon An Old Ancient Trick That Lead To My Biggest Breakthrough As A Weight Loss Coach For Men And Women Who Want Amazing Results While Still Enjoying The Foods They Love

It’s what my wife’s fully functional, 100% coherent, and totally independant 99 year old Grandmother had been using for years to control her blood sugars, keep her energy up and stay young.

I was in shock at her amazing health and the way these people lived…

No wonder it’s the number one place for people to retire, everyone lives longer healthier lives in Ecuador.

After having my wife translate to me why her family had all been using various herbal blends, teas, and so on for just about everything you could think of…

I thought, wow, we are so living the modern life…

We’re so dependant on unnatural remedies for EVERYTHING.

But we don’t have to be…

My wife’s family from Ecuador was living proof.

When I got back to the nearest wifi area for gringos who need to “stay connected” while travelling, I started devouring the research on all these plant based remedies for weight loss, energy, blood sugar management, and overall health.

After just a few days of researching…

I finally understood that I needed to get this information out to more people who’re literally killing themselves with today’s over the counter remedies for weight loss. It happened, I tested these blends out on myself and a few close clients who thought I was just coming off a travel high from Ecuador…

To my amazement, these seemingly secret combinations and blends were the “natural ingredients” to remedy a flatter tummy, smaller waist and toned body.

As soon as we tested this out on the first group of clients, the results were amazing.

“When You See That 25 pounds and 14-inches Lost It Really Does Look Like Something!”

Stacey is a wonderful wife and stay at home Mom of 4 children…

Like most moms, she always put everyone before herself. But this eventually started weighing on her – literally.

She came to me in hopes of finding a weight loss solution that could fit her hectic mom/wife schedule and be sustainable….

“When you see that 25 pounds (and 14″) lost really does look like something!”

And now, starting as early as tomorrow morning, you too can start enjoying the slim belly secrets that are holding so many people back from having the flat and firm belly they desire and deserve.

Introducing: LEAN BELLY DETOX

The Only Herbal Flat Belly Solution Guaranteed For Men & Women Over 40 To Turn Off Your Master Carb Hormone & Significantly Flatten Your Belly, Improve Your Health and Increase Your Energy

I’m very excited to get this NEW Lean Belly Detox into your hands because Men and Women over 40 need this natural remedy route more than ever…

On this path, your health is restored, and your body transformation goals are fully realized and achieved…

Your life is full of vigor, free of stress, and overflowing with energy…

The kind of energy you need to spend with your family, your children, and your most cherished relationships…

It’s the path that allows you to enjoy and experience the things that you love most in life, like pizza, bread, pasta, and dessert like a normal person over 40.

Lean Belly Detox is a 21-day metabolism boosting, “fast results” driven system that uses a combination of herbal blends that I learned about while down in Ecuador…

To flatten your belly fast, take control of body, your health, and ultimately your life’s path, without ever having to starve yourself thin or work yourself like a slave to the gym…

So if you’re sick and tired of disappointment, frustration, weight gain and increased health risks as your blood sugar issues and insulin sensitivity continue to wreak havoc on your body, then…

You’re probably in dire need of these little known flat belly secrets that work for ANYONE at ANY age in ANY shape or size to turn off your master carb hormone and literally melt away 4-7 pounds immediately while enjoying your most delicious and favorite foods.

Here’s What’s Included When When You Grab The Lean Belly Detox Today!

This NEW Lean Living Formula Works For ANYONE, At ANY Age In ANY Shape Or Size, Even When…

I totally understand, and that because there isn’t another simple and practical solution that focuses on turning OFF your master carb hormone without working out for 60 minutes per day, eating no carbs and restricting calories.

Good news for you though, you can turn off your master carb hormone, improve your blood sugar management, to wake up feeling lighter and more energized, starting tomorrow thanks to a magical herbal blend that anyone can enjoy.

Understand, it not your fault. You’re not alone. You were just never given the right information…

I’ve always hated the word “diet”…

And much like you, staying so rigid to a diet plan seems like a death sentence!

But that’s exactly why this system will be great for you. Next to the Herbal Miracle Belly Blend, I’ve incorporated a very easy to use guide on how you can enjoy your favorite foods so your belly and your brain never feel like caving in and quiting.

This simple solution actually works BETTER when you strategically go “OFF Your Diet” because the variety of delicious foods actually stimulates your hormones and jump starts your metabolism for a leaner body, FASTER.

Did you see my 98 year old Grandmother In Law?

All you need is the willingness to live the life you desire and deserve and be able to eat food and you’ll never be too old get that sexy, lean body you want…

You’re not going to do bodybuilding, or joint thrashing workouts…

No Insanely scheduled workout plans that leave no time for anything else…

And certainly no strict diets that having you feeling like crap, killing your metabolism, dropping water weight, and setting you up for a disastrous rebound effect.

All you need to do is a few simple herbal blend tricks and time things right – Easy.

After working with thousands of my gym members and online clients around the world, I can tell you that I’ve heard all about the stressors, fears, limiting factors, and what has prevented people from getting the results they’re looking for…

Most weight loss programs leave you confused, focus on cutting calories, eating insane amounts of veggies, slashing carbs and doing long boring workouts.

The whole process becomes time consuming, and too much to handle for the average person who’s not a gym junkie like the personal trainer who wrote the program.

Instead, you need to maximize your natural circadian rhythm, shut of your fat storing hormone, and force your body to use fat for fuel instead of storing the food you eat on your belly.

You Won’t Find These Flat Belly Miracle Blends From Ecuador ANYWHERE Else

What makes this firm belly maker so unique is that in all my years of being a coach, aspiring athlete and helping so many people find the right resources that will work fast and efficiently…

I’ve never came across a more natural, simple solution.

One that doesn’t require your weight loss goals to become a job and have you “eat less and work more” like most traditional programs.

See, the mainstream media, doctors, and weight loss experts around the world actually get sucked into the same marketing hype that the actual consumer does. Either because they’re naive, or because they see that they can make a quick buck as well…

There’s a much easier and faster solution to losing excess belly flab week after week and shutting off your master carb hormone.

Unless you’ve travelled to places across the world where there’s no other option than to resort to natural methods to owning a lighter and leaner body, you may have never learned about this remedy that you can start using as early as tomorrow.

…But For A Fraction Of The Cost

I’m sure you know, good help always comes with cost and to own your dream life and healthy vibrant body would presumably be quite expensive when having all the lean belly secrets placed on your lap within the next 24hrs.

And if you’ve found yourself becoming a statistic to those who start and stop gym memberships and diet programs and continue to struggle year after year as the pounds keep grasping onto your hips and belly, no matter what you try…

Then certainly, a solution that offers you guaranteed results in such little time can’t be cheap!

However, starting now…

For the first and only time, you can get the same rapid fat loss results as those who train with me daily with in-person sessions at a fraction of the cost.

And here’s the good news…

There’s absolutely ZERO risk on your part because…

I’ve Made The Entire Lean Belly Detox System Available For YOU To Try – Risk Free

As a small business owner for the past 10 years, not only do I take pride in what I do and my successes, but I also value what YOU, the customer looks for when making a purchase and getting what you pay for.

That’s why I’ve been able to confidently give you my unheard of guarantee to make sure that you’re 100% satisfied with your results, or you’ll get every penny back.

Simply put, that means that you can try The Flat Belly Miracle, and if at any point you feel over the next 60 days you feel The Flat Belly Miracle isn’t for you, for any reason whatsoever, you can ask for a prompt, courteous, unconditional refund by contacting our customer support or by emailing [email protected]

There’s no doubt in my mind that once you commit, and take action on this easy to use system, you will flatten your belly and add vitality to your life for years to come.

That’s why I have no issue giving a 100% Triple Guarantee or your money back, with ALL risk on me.

Check out these Results Driven Guarantees:

Results Driven Guarantee #1: ANY-BODY can do this

This was designed to get ANY body type, of ANY person, at ANY age amazing results.

These flat belly miracle secrets that were stumbled upon while I was in Ecuador will put the lock on your master carb hormone so that you can stop a belly that just keeps getting bigger and bigger, year after year – For good!

Results Driven Guarantee #2: You’ll See Immediate Results

In just a few short days you’ll not only see immediate results on the scale, but you’ll feel the effects of this true blood sugar and hormone-balancing solution.

That’s what makes this lean body solution so amazing and has everyone jumping on the opportunity to try this natural solution.

Results Driven Guarantee #3: You’ll Actually Enjoy It & Keep Motivated

Gone are the days of eating like a bodybuilder to lose weight from eating plain chicken and broccoli 6-times per day, working out for crazy intense minutes and counting calories like it’s your job…

It’s time to focus on adding vitality to your life, working out to feel energized, not dead-tired and waking up leaner, lighter, and healthier so that you can enjoy life they you want it.

By making this smart choice today you’ll find yourself firmly grabbing a hold of your life and making weight loss progress day after day with minimal effort using these secrets, and you’ll never waste your money on another dreadful diet fad.

You Can Feel Relaxed… Knowing That You Can Go Through The Paces Of This Program Before Deciding

When you decide to snag this flat belly miracle blueprint today, you can try it out for the next 60 days on me. If you feel that you didn’t get the value your were looking for, I will personally refund you 100% of your money, no questions asked.

Today you can take full advantage of our unconditional triple backed guarantee for the next 60 days and experience the results you’re looking for. If you don’t get what you’re looking for – you pay nothing.

If You’re Serious About This, Then Acting Today Has It’s Perks With Special Discounts For YOU

Because we’re looking for serious action takers who we know can use our help, just like you…

We want to make this natural belly slimming solution very accessible as we launch this new program…

However, this creates an issue because as website traffic builds and our partners want to promote our new discovery, the cost goes up for everyone.

But right now you have the option to hop on board as we fire this offer out to the public with a massive sale to gain awareness around the globe.

Now with that being said, business changes happen, costs are always changing and we cannot guarantee the price will be the same tomorrow.

All you need to do today is click the “Buy Now” button below to get instant access and your early bird discount will be applied to your order.

Gain Access To Your Copy Of The Lean Belly Detox Today and Get Instant Access To The Belly Flattening, Waist Shrinking System at an Amazing 85% OFF

Listen, You’re Now At The Inevitable Crossroads That Every Consumer Faces and You Have But 2-Options

This side of the road is the one that leads you to more disappointment, weight gain, increased frustrations, and future health risks with your aging body…

Blood sugar issues and insulin sensitivity start to control your life, spinning out of control and putting the death grip on every aspect of your life…

As your travel this tough road, you’ll find yourself continually struggling with more unsuccessful bouts of dieting, food deprivation, and lack of motivation, getting you nowhere, and achieving next to nothing…

Your most valued gifts of health and vitality will continue to decline as your belly bulge stays, your waist expands and your self-esteem diminishes further…

Even worse than these devastating problems this road will have you on with your personal health and well-being…

Is the heavy toll it takes on your loved ones, your immediate family and all those who mean the world to you as they watch your health deteriorate, and your true potential in the world go unrealized…

But It Doesn’t Have To Be This Way…

This is the path you’re looking for…

The road that leads to total control of your health, vitality and longevity because you know that the path you’re taking has been paved by hours of research, used for thousands of years, and the it’s holistic approach you know is best for you.

On this road, your body transformation goals come to fruition, health is restored, your full of energy, free from stress and leading a life that’s full of vigor to spend with your loved ones…

It’s the one path that enables you to experience all that life has to give, do the things that make you happy and enjoy the simple pleasurable things in life including your favorite carbs like bread, potatoes, rice, cereal and bread… without feeling guilty.

By making the decision to take this path you’ll look back with no regret, no guilt and feel like you’ve been freed from all that once tied you down and left you in a state of deprivation and depression.

This is the path that you desire and deserve for yourself…

To Taking Control of Your Life and Making Lasting Changes For What Matters Most…

P.S – Just know that the one thing I can is that over the years I’ve simply practiced what I teach. I’m all-in with what I share and experience life with the health and vitality I aspire for you to have.

But what I do know is this…

The ONLY reason you haven’t gained control of your master carb hormone is because nobody has presented you with a solution that’s easily, practical, natural and fixes the actual problem.

I’ve yet to see another program or solution that address the REAL problems you’re having and why you’ve been struggling for so long.

P.P.S – Remember this… As you grow older, those very issues I had you read earlier such as Depression, Emotional disorders, Lost productivity, Increased sick time, Increased medical bills, Increased insurance rates, Heart disease , Stroke, Metabolic syndrome, Memory issues, Downregulated brain activity, Alzheimer’s disease, And more…

Yet you know that by having this herbal blend in the morning before breakfast that you can reverse these risks in just minutes per day with little to no effort and put the brakes on your waist expanding and belly bulging hormone for good.

P.P.P.S – You Can Rest Assured On Your Decision. You know now that you can try the entire Flat Belly Miracle System for 60 days, risk free. Try this out for yourself and if you don’t get the results you desire, you can get 100% of your money back – no questions asked.

Still Have More Questions?

Sure, We May Have Them Answered Already Below For You

Yes, this formula works very well because it hits your carb storing hormone on the head with a “blocking effect”…

That’s caused by years of consuming a diet that’s loaded of processed, blood-sugar-spiking carbs and added sugars that makes most people not nearly as sensitive to insulin as they used to be in their younger years…

The formula works better for the older less sensitive population by dramatically increasing fat burning capabilities, decreasing blood sugar levels, and decreasing fat storage…

And that’s not all; this flat belly formula can lead to increased performance, improved sleep, increased recovery time (very important as we age), and decreased muscle soreness.

Yes, this is so important to us because value simplicity for our customers. We understand you don’t want to have a difficult time knowing where to start…

Which is why we’ve created the membership site that gives you easy login access to all the guides in an easy-to-follow layout.

Once you pick up the Lean Belly Detox you’ll have instant access to the membership site and “step 1” will be presented to you so that you can start the first module and begin to strip of the belly fat right away.

We’ve kept this very simple, cheap, and easy to access by producing a 100% digital product that you can start implementing immediately after you click the buy now button.

No, we have other membership programs available but we make those very visible to the buyer so they know exactly what they’re getting when they purchase from us.

Once you get your offer and get start with the VIP discounted fee, you have a full 60 days to try this – on me.

If you fail to get the results you desire and deserve, no worries, you can take advantage of the full 60 Day Triple Money Back Guarantee – No Questions Asked!

Once you begin putting The Lean Belly DetoxTM ingredients in your body and letting them control your Master Carb Hormone, you’ll begin to notice immediate benefits.

The old school ways of eating less, working out longer, and depriving yourself do NOT work as we get older. It’s not sustainable and only leads to more failure.

By simply implementing this easy to get started way of eating and taking the holistic approach we’ve provided…

You’ll start experiencing your waist size decreasing, belly fat diminishing and your youthful energy will start coming back, day after day, thanks to these unconventional ways that are provided with The Lean Belly Detox system.

More Questions – Email Support: [email protected]

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Due to recent statements from the FTC, it is required that we identify what a “typical” results. Although no one can guarantee results, multiple studies have shown the link between foods and their ability to help alleviate various conditions and diseases. Your results depend on your commitment and diligence with the program, there is no such thing as a magic pill.

The Lean Belly Detox Program is an educational service that provides generalized health information. Matt Stirling is not a licensed physician, and his advice is not a substitute for medical advice. Please consult a physician before beginning any exercise or diet program.

Click here to get Lean Belly Detox at discounted price while it’s still available…

#Belly #detox #Lean

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