#it was an Ordeal just getting the pharmacy to let me talk to a person

[exrayspex]

i hate doctors and pharmacies so much..... for nearly a year now, i've been stuck getting either double the amount of nadolol that i need or none of it. i'm either drowning in extra bottles of pills or going without. and every time i try to fix this, it doesn't work!

my doctor assured me he would update the prescription to be accurate (it was set at 2x the amount i was supposed to get) last time i saw him when i asked about it. but then he just didn't do that. i then just never picked up one of the extra bottles bc i didn't need a fucking fourth bottle, and i assumed that would be the last of the extra pills. but that made the pharmacy take the script off of auto-refill, and they didn't tell me about this. so when i stopped getting all those extra pills, i thought it was bc my doctor had done what i asked. but no, the pharmacy had just stopped filling my script. didn't get to figure this all out until i ran out of my medication 🙃

[jjkamochoso]

In Sickness and Sadism

Not fluff, not angst, but a secret third thing... (it's Feitan from HxH, what can I say)

Feitan Portor x gn!reader with chronic illness

You can't afford your medicine. Feitan won't accept that!

Warnings: cussing, breaking of human bones, mentions of other violence (not toward reader)

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

You were incredulous. You had been frequenting the same pharmacy in your home town since you could remember and the price for medicine had always been consistent. That's what you liked about shopping there--the owner didn't price gouge like they did in every other store. Now, you didn't know what to do. You needed to buy the damn medicine or else you would be miserable, or probably even dead. It already wasn't easy having to deal with a chronic illness and now you had to face the fact that you definitely didn't have enough money to buy something you needed to live.

"That's just how much it is now, don't cry to me about it," sneered the cashier and you felt your anger bubble up at his lack of empathy. Your life was terribly unfair and you wanted to scream, cry, and punch the smirk off the cashier in that order.

"Please, can I talk to Mr. Greck, the owner, about this? I've been coming here for years, maybe he can get me a discount," you pleaded, but the cashier just laughed at you.

"The owner has a job from which he needs to make money. Not that you would know what it's like to have money in the first place. So no, you can't waste his time begging like the poor person you are. Now get out or I'll throw you out."

You glared at him, hoping he was bluffing, but he seemed the type to follow through with hurting someone like you and you knew your body couldn't take the exhaustion, especially if you were going to be off your medicine for a while. You needed to make sure you were in good condition to work every day of the week, plus overtime, to make enough to buy your month's supply. Feeling defeated and upset, you left the building, tears falling freely.

Feitan prided himself on his distinct lack of empathy. He relished in the fact that the pain of others makes him feel warm inside. There was no better symphony of sounds than people crying and screaming for their pain to stop.

So why the fuck was he finding himself so outraged at some random person's medical predicament?

The raven haired man had stopped in to a local pharmacy to pick up (ahem... steal) some supplies for the Troupe in case anyone managed to get hurt on the latest mission. He wasn't paying attention to his surroundings for the first few minutes of his shopping spree, completely uncaring to someone else's woes of the fragility of the human body. All of a sudden, after stuffing the last roll of gauze in his sleeve, his ears perked up to listen in to the conversation happening at the front register.

"What do you mean the price went up that much?"

His eyebrows furrowed. Not that he cared, because he wasn't paying for any of his things anyway, but he did notice that the price tags here for items displayed significantly lower numbers than previous pharmacies he had visited in other areas around. You had affirmed his findings in your conversation with the cashier and Feitan felt his blood boiling at the brash rudeness coming from the cashier's mouth. Who did that scum think he was, speaking like that to someone for no reason? Feitan certainly wasn't the nicest guy around but even he had the decency to not be a total jerk to random strangers, let alone people in distress about their medical and financial woes. He didn't know why he was giving this ordeal the time of day. Maybe it was because of his upbringing? He saw this type of thing daily in Meteor City. Hell, he lived it himself. There was nothing scarier than seeing a totally healthy person decay rapidly and shrivel into nothingness, all because they were born in unfortunate circumstances. He scoffed when he saw you leaving in tears. Why didn't you just use your brain and brawn and steal it? Were you too weak? He saw your fists clenching earlier and figured you were strong enough to take down that slime ball. If you did end up getting your ass kicked, at least you didn't lie down like a dog and take it, like you were doing now. His eyes followed your frame until you left the building and he watched until your silhouette was no longer visible outside. He didn't know why he was doing this. He wasn't supposed to make a big scene whenever he was out and about, but the events were already set into motion before he could stop himself.

"5 month supply of whatever that person needed." Feitan ordered, pointing to the boxes behind the cashier's head.

The cashier just laughed at him. "You too, huh? What are you, their boyfriend or somethin'? Maybe their kid? Scrawny little thing."

Oh, he'll wish he never had a tongue to speak those words.

Feitan kept his cool, procuring a velvet bag from his person and set it on the counter with a clank emitting from the contents of inside. "I have money."

The cashier's mouth opened in a greedy smile. He quickly retrieved the 5 month supply Feitan requested and put it in a bag.

"That'll be 100,000 Jenny."

Feitan smirked under his cowl. He reached into the bag, seemingly to pull out money, but instead of coins, the cashier's outstretched hand was met with a mini hammer. The sickening crunch of bones could be heard as the man howled in pain.

"Oh? Big man can't handle small hammer?" Feitan taunted, his eyes crinkled in delight at the man's suffering. The cashier tried to reach for a gun he had stashed behind the counter but Feitan was much too fast, grabbing his wrist and turning his arm the wrong way so that, too, was broken. The cashier couldn't get a word out, instead crying out with tears running down his face.

"Don't cry to me about it." Feitan mocked the worker by using his own words against him. The shorter man hummed a bit, thinking of what to do next. He needed to finish up quickly or else he'd lose track of you and end up having done this all for nothing.

Well, this wasn't all for nothing either way. He needs to make sure he practices his methods often so he doesn't lose his edge.

Feitan grabbed the bag containing the medicine and cleaned up his own bag of tools while the cashier was lying on the floor, writhing in pain and ready to pass out. He gave him a strong kick before turning toward the door.

"Good luck getting all that fixed at hospital. If you can afford it."

You were walking down the street, dejected and unsure of what to do when you felt a nauseating presence appear behind you. You turned around to face a short man with a skull face covering offering you a bag. Naturally, you were hesitant to take it, but he nudged it to you again.

"Medicine. For you."

Your eyes widened in surprise. Did you hear the soft spoken man correctly? You tore open the bag and saw multitudes of your medicine within.

"5 months. Go get better job or learn to steal."

You went to thank him but he was already gone, disappearing like a ghost. You were thoroughly confused but at the same time, extremely grateful. You stood on the street corner in a daze until the sound of screaming could be heard somewhere close to you.

"Someone please help! This cashier's been seriously injured!"

You whipped around to see a woman running out from... the pharmacy? What exactly had that man done to get you what you needed? You were ready to run away from the scene so you weren't questioned as a suspect when you caught a glimpse of your savior once more, watching you like a hawk from the rooftop of the building next to you. He put his finger to where his lips resided under his mask, a signal to stay quiet about what happened, as he let out a short maniacal laugh and disappeared from your sight.

Feitan finally realized why he decided to help you that one day. There were many people in this world he'd gladly see rot to death and then rot even further after that.

But not you.

No, you were much too attractive to be a corpse so soon.

[my-watch-begins]

Sam Drake x Reader: The Sam Drake Experience.

Warning: smut, language.

Words: 2995

Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3 // Part 4

~•~•~•~

Costumer service sucked. You were fucking sure that Hell involved running a little shop owned by Satan, and all he allowed in were people who complained about how they wanted their latte with a bit more milk and they could tell you hadn't put enough.

After a stressful day, all you wanted to do was take your bra off and sit on the couch with a glass of wine, even though it might be too early to start drinking. Plan in mind, you swung your apartment door open, then closed it with your feet, leaving your bag on a chair next to the door.

The TV clicked on after pressing the button, after that you threw the control on the couch and reached behind your back to undo your bra. Your apartment door was knocked, and you walked the short distance to it, still trying to undo your bra.

"Who is it?" You ask, knowing well who it was.

"It's me" he replied, you opened the door and found Sam standing in your doorway. "Shitty day?" He asks, walking into the apartment, you close the door behind him and finally unlock the back strap of your bra.

"It's the usual these days, the holidays make people crazy" you unhooked the straps out of the cups and pulled your bra from beneath your shirt.

"Have I ever told you how I cannot comprehend how the fuck do women take out their bras without taking their shirts off?"

You chuckle, seeing him pull out the lone bottle of wine you had from the upper cabinet.

"And you?" You plop on the couch and hear the click of his lighter.

"Meh-" he lets out in a little whine "had to postpone a trip because of the holidays"

"You were leaving on New year's Eve?"

"Duty calls" he sits next to you and hands you a glass, you take it a clink it with his before taking a sip.

Sam had been your neighbor for a while, almost a year, and after he'd hosted you in his house when you lost your keys, you had become good friends, really good friends, talk for hours kind of friendship, but not everyone thinks we're dating kind of friendship. Sam knew about your past romantic disappointments, having been there for the aftermath of finding some random girl jumping on your then boyfriend's dick when you came home early from work. Ever since then, you hadn't want anything to do with men.

Sam knew about your lack of love life, you knew that he had the exact opposite. Living next to him lead you to hear, and wonder, just what the hell he did to women in bed to have them scream and make their voices quiver for hours sometimes.

"Where were you going anyway?"

"Had a job in Spain. Guess I'll leave it for later"

"And what are you gonna do for New Year's?"

He gave you a twist of his eyebrows as he smirked.

"Maybe I'll head over to Nathan's, after that maybe a bar, there's usually some wild girls out there that night"

You snort, shaking your head.

"And you?" He inquired.

"Probably stay here. And no, I'm not going with you to your brother's. And definitely not with you to a bar to watch you get instantly laid"

"You can be my wingwoman, even better, I can be your wingman" you grimaced, leaving the now empty glass in the side table next to you.

"No thank you, you'll be an even worse pick for men than me"

"Don't be like that" he teased, nudging your shoulder "maybe I'll find the love of your life"

"Well, I don't want to meet the love of my life, right now I could do with just a good fucking"

"Oh wow!" He gasped surprised "well, that's an entirely different subject because I don't think there's that many man out there that are going to help you with that"

"I'm not that un-fuckable" you argue, making him giggle.

"I'm not saying you are, just saying they're not going to do it right"

"Oh, and you know how to do it right?" You teased, bitting your cheek to avoid let out a giggle.

Sam and you teased eachother about sex all the time, if the subject ever came up in a group of friends he would always try to stick out with his stories and tips and tricks about women, and you usual just brushed him off, thinking it was a man thing to do. That was what you initially thought, up until the point when he actually started bringing girls around on the weekends and you could just hear not only how he made woman feel, but how much he enjoyed having them quiver underneath them... Well, you assumed they were always underneath, Sam didn't look the type to let a chick straddle him for long.

"There's a difference between fucking a woman and fucking a woman, you know" he emphasized, taking the last drag out of his cigarettes.

"Yeah, I know the difference" you say, your eyes wandering around the room, trying to remember the last time you actually had a good time in bed.

"You know-" he began with a little voice that made you snap you head back to face him.

"Don't you dare" you warned.

"I'm just saying-" he excused showing you his palms.

"That you could take me to bed" you concluded for him.

"That I could show you the Sam Drake Experience" he motions at you with his hand.

"The Sam Drake Experience?" You giggled "fuck no, Sam"

"Why not?"

"Because we're friends" He frowned in confusion at your answer "I know how the movie goes and how it ends, it's always like 'yeah, we can be friends with benefits' and guess what? They fall in love. I don't want love right now."

You stand up and motion at the door.

"I'm going to take a shower so-"

He hastily stands up and walks to the door, but after he opens he turns on his heels.

"Fine, forget I said it, and besides, just offered to fuck you, not asked your hand in marriage"

You push him by the shoulder, turning him towards the door with an amused chuckle.

"Get the hell out of here" you grabbed the door just as he stepped out "I'll see you tomorrow"

"Happy New years" he says over his shoulder as he walks down the corridor towards his apartment.

You closed the door and leaned on it, crossing your arms at your chest.

The following days after new years, things between you and Sam continued their normal course thankfully, because you really couldn't see yourself without the one person with whom you liked to watch movies, or share long talks over a drink, he'd beckoned you to go back to college, and you were currently studying online for a pharmacy degree. In return for the constant state of anxiety you were sometimes summed into around finals week, he had offered to stay up with you, crunching for the hours before an exam. You crushed it when you two studied together. Sam was just that friend who warmed up your heart.

So, when he brought up the solution to your problems, you hated knowing that it really could fuck up what you had, and you definitely didn't want to lose your buddy.

You had given up smoking, but that day you felt like you needed to ponder over a cigarette before walking to his apartment.

You had been so stressed the first week of the year, and with classes starting soon you felt like you needed to disconnect for a second. Music didn't help, getting drunk either, that just made you overthinking everything more, and you didn't know why but you felt like Sam was the only way out.

You walked to his apartment, stopped halfway and sighed, unsure if you should continue, you turned your head to your place, then shook it and resumed your walk, there was nothing really for you at your place but space for more stressful things to build up, so you just reached his apartment and quickly knocked the door, knowing that the faster you had Sam in front of you you wouldn't be able to back down.

He opened the door, moving into the apartment and letting you squeeze through the door, he had a book in his hand and strewn papers on the table.

"You busy?" You asked, removing your jacket.

"Kind of, what's up?" He asked pointing at the chair in front of you.

"I'm here because-" you stopped long enough for him to quickly wiggle his eyebrows suggestively at you, throwing the book on the table with a loud thump.

"Because-" he teased.

You threw your head back with a sigh.

"Don't make me say it"

"I really want to hear you say it" he stood in front of you, with your head tilted back you could get a good look at his face looking down at you.

"The Sam Drake Experience" you grunted reluctantly, he laughed loudly, placing his hands on your shoulders.

"Come on" he placed his hand on your shoulder blade and pushed you to the bedroom "it'll be fun"

"I have conditions" you turned around just as you crossed the door, Sam linked his hands in front of him and gave you a smile, he was having the time of his life with the whole ordeal, you could tell. "First, I don't want you to give me love kisses" you pointed at him "I want fuck kisses"

"Right" he nodded.

"Second, I'm going to take my shirt off" you gave it a tug "and I don't want you to look at my tits like you've never seen a pair of tits before, they're normal boobs."

He hummed thoughtfully, a sly smirk still painting his face "alright".

"And for the love of Satan Sam, I don't want to ruin the friendship"

He shook his head instantly denying with a twist of his hand "we won't, don't worry"

"Do you promise?" You pushed.

"I promise" he quickly placed his hand on his chest, then grinned. "I have questions too" lifting his other hand he began counting "spanking, hair pulling, choking?"

You tilted your head to the side, your eyes glinting with excitement "ooh, yes please"

"Right" he said with a low voice.

He walked a step to you, and you wanted to walk back, but quickly reminded yourself that his bed was right there. Also, you wanted this, there was no reason to pull back.

"So, I'll tour you in the SDE" he began joking, you couldn't help but choke on a laugh "usually me and the other participant walk into the room, most times with a few more drinks than what we have now, we're usually kissing at this point"

He placed his hands on your neck, he pressed his thumb on your chin and lifts your face up to meet with his "I have an angle I like to kiss women in, they usually love it" his voice lowers down to a whisper, he pressed his pointer finger on the spot just below your earlobe, suddenly making you shiver "you're actually the perfect height for this" he compliments.

He leans in, but stops an inch before your lips. You'd taken a breath and closed your eyes, readying yourself for the kiss that never came. You hear him chuckle, and your hands push on his chest scoldingly.

"Stop fucking with me"

"I thought that's why you came here for?" He jokes again, you try to pull back, getting angry for all the teasing, but he tightened the grip on you, keeping you still "fine, I'll stop, but it's not fun if I don't tease"

You were about to reply to that when he suddenly crashed his lips to yours, you tasted him, his lips, the small pricks of his five o'clock shadow, his tongue teased your lower lip, but before you could open up he followed with his teeth, scrapping your lower lip and pulling, turning his head around to continue the kiss from the other side.

His hands slipped from your jaw directly to your backside, squeezing your glutes tightly and pulling you up on your tiptoes, your body flushing with his. You could feel his hard chest under your hands, you'd kept them on his sides, balling his shirt with them. He lets out a grunt and lets go, making you lay your feet back on the ground and stumbling back just a bit. He stared at your flushed face, your skin turning red at your lips and cheeks.

"Good" he praises "now after the kissing, I like to take the shirt off to, you know-" he swiftly pulls his shirt over his head and discards it to the side "let the guest see the goods" he motions at his chest, you laugh a little, rubbing a hand on your sore lips. He motions at you to do the same, and still with a smile you grab your shirt and pulled up.

You inspect the look on his face, his eyes moving from one of them to the other, his bottom lip sticks up quickly, leading his hand to one of them.

"These are nice" he cups one of your breast and your breath gets caught in your throat, not only his hands were big enough to cup them, but his hands were cold, and the contrast with your hot skin made you jump a little. His other hand reaches to you other breast, pinching your nipple and swinging it side to side.

"Sam I will murder you" you threaten slapping his hand from your nipple, seeing that he was just playing with you, he laughs, making you chuckle as well. Retreating his hands, he leans in to grab you by the back of the thighs and pulls up, jolting you to the bed. His hands head over to your pants, unbuttoning them and sliding them across your legs.

"You haven't made a comment" he leers over you, grabbing you by the waist and pulling you up on the bed.

"You haven't shown me the goods" his eyebrow tugs up and he motions at himself, you chuckle, inspecting his muscles under a layer of chest hair, his broad shoulders were probably your favorite part of his chest. "I've seen you without a shirt before" you excused. He moved to stand on the side of the bed, taking his pants off and joining you, kneeling between your legs.

"Are comments allowed?" He asks, placing his hands on your knees and pulling up, your feet hold your legs up, and he runs a tempting hand down your inner thigh, you pull you arms up over your head, making your boobs stretch in the process "like you look fucking beautiful right now?"

"That's an objective truth" you tease.

"Pet names? Babygirl, or baby in general?"

"Sure. But I'm not calling you Daddy, you're not my daddy"

He sinks down, matching your face with his, his hand sneaks below you to grab a handful of hair from the back of your neck, he pulls not to roughly, making your chin tilt up.

"You will" he assured in a low voice, his teeth scrape your chin, then your lower lip, then he begins a trail of half kisses half bites down your neck, collarbone, stopping at your breast. "We'll leave the girls for later" he bends down, sliding a bit down the bed as he finally reaches between your thighs.

His arms sneak under your legs, you feel the back of your thighs supported by the strong muscles of his arms and shoulders.

Your hips buckled in anticipation when he moved your panties to the side, then your mouth fell agape when his tongue ran across your slit, grumbling once he set out to work your clit with his tongue.

You began with eyes closed, letting out little whimpers as he worked you, but they suddenly developed into high pitch moans when he snuck two fingers inside you, reaching so deep into you your hands flew down to his shoulders as you pulled up your head to look down at him. He grabbed both of your hands with his large one, pinning them just above your belly button, you cried out when his fingers  thrusted into you at a speed you didn't know how he could achieve, his tongue still trained on keeping a good place over your clit. As you were getting closer, your moans were long, having to take short breaths between them to catch up. You stopped feeling his tongue on you, but was quickly replaced by his other hand, leaving your hands free for you to fist the bedsheets beneath you, then your hips buckled out of your control as Sam's fingers drove you to an orgasm, you cried out, arching your back and loosing control over yourself, your body tensed as your orgasm ripped through, and you welcomed it with a long moan, so erotic that made Sam grunt in response as he felt his fingers being gripped by your walls.

He waits for you breathing to catch up, then slips his hand out of you and pats you on the thigh.

You hear him chuckle, and open your eyes just as he slips from the bed and walks out of the room. You pant, running your hand through your scalp, then clear your throat and pull yourself up on your forearms.

Sam walks in with a bottle of water and sets it in the nightstand. His hand dips lower to the drawer and pulls it open, taking a condom with him as he looks over at you.

"That's the end of round one" he swings his hand in a presenting manner.

"Oh Jesus, how many are there?" You joke, moving to lay on your side.

"We'll see how many you can take"

[hot-mysticc-mess-blog]

Rfa and minor trio reacts to an mc with cf

 I didn’t know much about cystic fibrosis except for a vague mention in biology class during genetics so I learned a lot in writing this request. Hopefully it’s alright! 

I mostly used the CFF website and I found it very helpful and easy to navigate if anyone else is curious to learn more. 

My Masterlist

Jumin

He thought it was perfectly normal when you mentioned having a dietitian, he has his own nutritionist after all

Worried about the cough you had on the phone, but figured it was just a cold.

You brought a portable nebulizer a dose of each of your inhaled medications and your oral medications, but you were kind of expecting to be at least back at Rika’s apartment by the next day to do the majority of your therapies

You have to explain CF to him a little bit, but once he understands this is a serious health matter (which you accomplish rather easily by demonstrating that your bag is basically a pharmacy) he has Assistant Kang write up a report for him with information from leading researchers

Rather than letting you go home, he asks for your treatment routine and then purchases all the equipment for his penthouse and has your prescriptions sent over.

The compresser he got for the nebulizer happens to be nicer than yours so damn thanks Jumin

The fact that you have an illness that only has a median survival range of 40 only fuels his anxiety about you leaving him initially. He wants to spend every second of every day of his life with you, no matter how unreasonable that actually is…and he’ll never be able to. Most likely, you would die before him, and possibly well before him.

As promised, after the party he tries to pull back a little and let your relationship progress like a normal couple

Instead, he ends up calling you multiple times a day making sure you are following your doctor’s recommendations

Has his apartment humidity controlled for you. Oh, you don’t know what humidity you breathe best at? Well, you’re gonna find out

You thought you could procrastinate on that treatment? Think again.

He pays for the best available hospitals and doctors to be part of your care team basically as soon as he can convince you to let him

Suddenly, both he and C&R are deeply involved in supporting CF treatment research

Jumin Han would do anything to keep you healthy

Saeyoung/ 707

“Don’t waste your time on someone like me”

Found out during your background check

A quick snoop into your medical records…was suddenly a three-hour long dive

The closer he gets to you the more research he does on the disease

For himself, he thinks its punishment from god

Of course the person he loves is going to struggle with a chronic illness that will ultimately kill them early

But he doesn’t know what someone as wonderful as you could have possibly done to deserve this

Then the bomb gets hacked, and suddenly he can’t even care about if you’re going to survive the next few months or years, he’s terrified you won’t make it another hour.

“Don’t waste your time on someone like me” intensifies

Totally gives himself away though when he not only makes sure you eat lots of food to keep up your weight but offers to help you with your vest.

Programs lots of toys to help entertain you during long hospital visits or just during nebulizer treatments

Drives you to and from all your hospital treatments and doctor’s visits in his fanciest baby so you can feel like a movie star

Whenever you get sick he dresses up in a nurse costume and cracks jokes all the time, anything to distract you and make you smile

He is actually a pretty decent nurse, though not the best at the balanced nutrition thing

Feeds you lots of HBC and Ph.D Pepper, and is constantly offering you snacks.

He loves you so much he even tries to drag the both of you out of the house a few times a week for *cue ominous thunder*…exercise

The white noise from the nebulizer always puts him to sleep, so you use this to your advantage when his sleeping schedule is particularly bad

Zen

Zen didn’t find out until well after the party when you guys were Snapconversing and you sent him a selfie of you mid-treatment reading a book

“WHAT IS THAT THING!?” the first time he sees your nebulizer

He has hardly been sick in his entire life, so he has no idea what to do when he finds out a good chunk of your day is spent just keeping yourself from dying

He’s usually either completely forgotten you’re sick at all or fumbling over what to do with himself

It would be really easy to push yourself too hard if you didn’t speak up about your needs

When you first start dating he is super uncomfortable watching your treatments, doesn’t know what to do with himself and feels like he is going to hurt you or make something worse

“Do you need help?” He asked the first time you put on your Vest in front of him. After that he just kind of…stayed out of the way.

Does help you remember your oral medications and any supplements you have! He takes vitamins, and you two make a ritual out of taking them together.

Zen is all about low calorie, low fat eating habits and you need a high calorie, high fat diet to keep your weight healthy so eating dinner together can be hard

Likes to take you to McBurgerville…and order himself a salad

He’s always trying to quit smoking for you, but even when he falls off the wagon he makes sure to keep his shame cigarettes far, far away from the building

The cutest thing he’s ever done is offer you a face mask while you wore your Vest

Yoosung

Yoosung probably finds out last out of all of the RFA and is super bitter about it

After the intial panic of it, he’s mostly just very doting and supportive

Won’t do research on his own, but makes sure to memorize as much of what you tell him as he can

Cooks for you all the time! Whatever you want! Whenever you want! Please eat more food, MC!

Is very frustrated with how little he can do to help you

Is even more frustrated when Seven and Jumin occasionally offer to do things like pay for medical expenses or drive you to and from appointments.

He can’t do that, but he wants to be able to. He promises himself that when you guys get married he will have a car and be able to support you when you need it

You guys play games while you wear your Vest

He can never seem to decide whether to be impressed or pout at how good you are at playing LOLOL

Considers being a human doctor often, seeing all of the things you have to go through

Offers to come to every doctor’s appointment

Keeps suggesting to Jumin that his company should get involved in treatment research

Also complains to Zen about his smoking and how its bad for your lungs (even though you see him once, maybe twice, a year and he doesn’t smoke when he sees you)

Jaehee

Unlike Jumin, she grasps that you are the one who has been dealing with this for your whole life and know how to handle it

but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t worry

She finds out because you send her pictures of your food and she is very concerned about how much there is

Once you tell her about your cf, she is knee-deep in research

Terminal illness research isn’t exactly her favorite thing to be researching, but it might as well be now

She has an interest in seeing your treatments and knowing your usual schedule

Asks if there is any way she can help, and will always make time to prioritize your health

Prepare for worried lectures every time you tell her you skipped a treatment

And a follow-up movie night the next day, for which she brings popcorn and your medical equipment, to make sure you’re taking care of yourself

Your medications will never be disorganized again. They get their own cabinet.

The best hospital buddy with a purse like Marry Poppins’ bag and all your information ready to go

V/ Jihyun

When you first meet, he’s nearly blind and you have sticky mucus that causes problems for multiple organ systems in your body. Totally a match made in heaven.

He found out when you started coming down with a lung infection at the hospital after the whole ordeal with Mint Eye

Feels extra terrible about getting you involved in the situation, and about having you take care of him all that time.

When you decided to move in together, he makes sure there is plenty of space for all your things and clear corner with a cabinet for all you medications.

He likes both your company and the white noise of the nebulizer while he paints, so you usually do your treatments in the living room

The two of you take walks almost every day, even if it’s just the few blocks near your apartment

You also do a lot of training him. Talking him out of blaming himself when you have a bad day, keeping him from thinking he needs to be this omnipotent endlessly loving human being just because your days are a little more numbered than his.

Saeran

He knew when he first picked you as the RFA infiltrator for Mint Eye.

You would be a great candidate for Paradise with all the things you had to go through

But plans change Thankfully, in this case. Cults are bad Saeran.

It takes him a while to really get to know you, but the more he does the more worried he gets about how sick you are.

For a while it’s just him watching you intently while he fidgets, just another thing to add to his piles of anxiety

“You need to go home for your second treatment,” he snaps one day, interrupting you in the middle of a conversation with Saeyoung

He really likes learning how all your equipment and medicines work, it helps ease his anxiety about the situation

Still nervous about hospitals after his own stay, but he makes Saeyoung take you to your doctor’s appointments

Optimizes the compressor for your nebulizer

The two of you play a lot of board games together, or read each other stories to pass the time during your treatments, or on Saeran’s bad days.

Saeran was really nervous when you first asked him to read to you, but he preens every time you give him a compliment

Sometimes you drag Saeyoung into it (and sometimes he cannonballs himself between you shouting “TWIN TIME!”) and Saeran wonders if this is what its like to have a real family that loves each other

Your relationship doesn’t always have time for much more than just taking care of each other, but the two of you make it work

Vanderwood

He tries to nope away from his feelings for you really hard

It doesn’t matter how incredible you are

or how Seven teases Vanderwood about the way he looks at you (”its like the sun shines out her ass!”)

He is dangerous and prickly and you are kind and fragile

Is incredibly pissed at Seven for putting you in danger

“Their life is already in danger every single day and this is what you do!?”

Super impressed by how strong you are about everything, even if he won’t tell you outright

You thought he was a neat freak before? Oh just wait. As soon as he finds out how important it is you don’t get sick he is busy disinfecting everything

Tries to be secretly supportive of you however he can by using Seven as a proxy

Seven is a terrible proxy and constantly tells you Vanderwood did it

When you start spending time alone together he nearly runs himself ragged trying to be involved in your life while keeping you as far as humanly possible from his agency life

It’s absolutely a major argument in your relationship. Being fully involved in his life means accepting you won’t know most things about it.  It means accepting that you could die, or be targeted, and he doesn’t want that for you.

He doesn’t give in so much as you slowly worm your way into this part of his life as well.

Then he teaches you self-defense and makes you work out with him

[lightspren]

Year End 2017 Wrap Up

I’m gonna be straight up honest with y’all, I almost didn’t do one of these for this year because this year has sucked horrifically and I just didn’t see a fucking point. But I’ve done one every year for like, at least four years now, and it’s tradition, and I for some reason feel it’s important, so by damn I’m gonna look back on my text posts from the year and my memories of what I was doing and see what happened this past year.

Jan 2017 - Was beginning my last ever semester of undergrad this month. At this point I still thought I’d be going to grad school hahahah so much can fucking change in a few months. Started my AC sideblog so that’s cool. and even this far back (: we still see me struggling with debilitating pain (: which has been a trend ever since I’ve been doing these year summaries I think, is seeing how bad my pain was throughout the year. jfc. looks like I was struggling with some depression symptoms here too, go fucking figure. I had an interview for grad school too and we know how badly that went…

Feb - Here’s where I decided I thought i might be on the autism spectrum. I now think I was wrong on that self dx, but you know, journeys of self discovery are important and all that. but here’s lots more pain and tired and “brain not working” which was lots of depression symptoms I believe, sigh I let that get bad for a while there. Oh and then I learned I didn’t get into that grad school I got the interview for.  so yeah that was Feb in a nutshell l o l

Mar - Breath of the Wild came out this month and dominated my life for a month or two, I still love this game very much and it’ll always hold a special place in my heart, ti’s just so good and sweet and lovely. I still haven’t even really beat it LOL and I need to but. still. that’s never been the most important part of Zelda games to me. OOO THO I had beginnings of existential crises this month!! cause I was getting so bogged down in my thesis research and didn’t know if research was what I wanted to do forever and ever anymore!! isn’t that fun!! (it was not fun). but the rest of this month seems like. a whole lot of bitching about pain. paaaain pain pain. like holy jesus bitching about pain. maybe if I printed off all these posts and gave them to my doctors they’d believe I have a problem LOL.

Apr - So I had shitty dr appointments that further hurt my chronic illness identity, and then other Ongoing Identity Crisis because of not getting into grad school and wanting a job in which I could help people. this is the month I in earnest started applying for jobs; research tech jobs mostly, but some adjacent jobs too (don’t remember what exactly). I didn’t branch out very far at this point though cause I was still McFuckin Terrified. and then I realized that I didn’t want to leave hundreds of miles away for work, cause as much as a lot of the culture of southern Appalachia can suck sometimes, it’s still home, /my/ home, and I don’t want to abandon it. I know I freaked out a lot about getting my thesis done and presented this month too bc I was soooOooOOoO unmotivated to do that shit LOL like. whew. did not want to, did not care any longer, but still had to do it.

May - GOT MY FIRST EVER TICKET LOL THAT FUCKING SUCKED SO BAD. sigh. otherwise I was mostly vague as SHIT with stuff this month. I know I graduated, didn’t walk though cause I could not give less of a fuck at that point. I applied for every job I could find that I remotely qualified for that was close enough I was willing to move to. I even had a Skype interview for one, either this month or in April. it fell through, of course.

Jun - One of my very first June posts is “who the fuck am I/how do I become who I want to be” LOL so that identity crisis was still rip roaring obvs. then that time when I tried to explain disability stigma to one of my previous (cishet white male) bosses. Had another phone interview this month for another job I didn’t get lmfao. Pretty sure this is the month where I started applying for mental health case management jobs, like a bunch of them, at different locations all in the company I’m currently in.

July - So I think it must have been around the beginning of this month that I had my first in person interview? I bombed that one hardcore. didn’t stop another location from interviewing me though, and I got a second interview with them, which I then proceeded to fail because I had no prior experience. It was brutal LOL. and the new person started at my old job, and I had to start training her, and that whole situation was just awkward and weird and Undesirable. to the maaax. it was this whole ordeal too where they’d scheduled my last day to be the 28th of July, so that’s what I was planning on and like, focused on… but then it turned out my coworker got national guard orders and had to be gone two months, so instead of having newbie there by herself, they were like (to me) “hey… just wanna… chill for two months longer or until you find a job…” which was admittedly hella cool of them.

Aug - Lots of blogging about pain, lots of general vagueblogging. I did announce publicly on tumblr that I’m intending to convert to Judaism so that’s still cool, and still a thing, even if life has been repeatedly crotch-punching me so I haven’t been able to make much actual progress on it. but then, I had the interview for my current job. that i somehow passed with flying colors. And my asthma started getting worse, and I started getting soooooo so done with my old IT job, but I /got my new job/. ALSO THIS MONTH WE GOT RADS MY SWEET NEW BABY so now our family is made of me, my husband, and two kitties.

Sept - September. Oh, September. started out so innocently, with starting orientation for my new job. I was all starry eyed and hopeful for the new job because I thought that it was a perfect home for me. then I got there. started doing things. realized that I was terrified of trying to meet my new coworkers and learn their dynamics. realized I was terrified of trying to meet my new supervisors/superiors and learn their expectations. realized that in general I just didn’t know the culture of the place at all and that fucking /terrified/ me. and then the job itself, the job itself was something I’d never done before, had no experience in /whatsoever/, had no FUCKING clue what I was doing. I was a fish out of water with no bloody idea where I was going, and hoooboy. I almost quit by the end of September, I truly did.

Oct - tw: miscarriage at end of month I started therapy for my anxiety!!! yay!!!! I had a lot of adapting to work in this time too that I didn’t really talk much about on tumblr too I think. I mean I was learning a lot, I was meeting more of my clients, some even time. I was still terrified, especially of my other coworkers because I didn’t know them or understand them, but even at that, I was learning. [Stop reading if you need to avoid tw miscarriage and skip to Nov.] The other horrifically sucky thing to happen in Oct happened not to me, but to my sister. She’d found out a few months perviously that she was pregnant, at 37 years old. they’d just recently gotten all the genetic testings back and found out they were going to have a girl. unfortunately though, the baby stopped developing at 15w. my sister discovered this at what would’ve been 17w. she had to have surgery to remove the baby. she’s still recovering from this trauma, she’s heartbroken and just. very upset. I’m still upset for her too.

Nov - Last month I was doing ok I think. I was doing pretty well at work, kinda just coasting along but mostly getting the hang of things. Therapy had been helping I think; it’d been teaching me somethings, mostly only small differences but I think having someone to talk to had been helping frankly. Work was going well, and we’d decided to start looking for a house to /buy/ (realtor.com) but hadn’t hired a realtor yet. probably for the best. as it turns out now…

Dec - Fuck you, December. the good news is, my new job’s health insurance kicked in Dec. 1st. which is great, considering I got admitted to the hospital  Dec. 7th, a Thursday. the Monday prior I’d tried to pop a zit, no big deal. WRONG. it got infected. not just any old infection, though, oh no. FUCKING MRSA. so I got cellulitis in my face, my whole right side of my face swelled up three times the normal, I got MRSA/pneumonia in my lungs, I had MRSA in my bloodstream. when I came in the ER I had very low blood pressure and heartrate of 130, so I was septic. like. shit was going down. I stayed in the hospital 6 days, and they released me with a PICC line and having to do vancomycin (really strong IV antibiotic) twice a day via the line. I went back to work too early for two days, but saw my PCP on the third day and he put me off that again. /Then the chest pain started/. I assumed it was a side effect of the vancomycin, since back and chest spasms/pain are a listed side effect, but NO, apparently NOT, at least not to this DEGREE. The home health pharmacy, who I called to ask about it, called the on-call at my PCP, who advised to go to the ER to get checked for a “pulmonary embolism.” Doesn’t sound scary at aaaaaaaaaall. Get in ER, go through the whole terrifying ordeal, CT scan, x-ray, shit and shebang - what do you fucking know. I have a septic embolism. very rare. much wow. fuck me. so here I am, once again, in a fucking hospital room, tied up to IV antibiotics, at the end of Christmas day. At least they’re keeping the pain meds going now. Oh at one point my kidney function tried to drop, then it turned out I had a pleural effusion so they drained 550cc (half a liter) of fluid off my lungs (painful as fuck let me tell you). Ended up spedning 5 days total in the hospital, home now, but still in like. the same amount of pain as when I went in. Having to fight with so many things to get medicines sorted and shit. while feeling like shit too. everything is awesome.

So that’s it. 2017. That doesn’t even get into the way 2017 has sucked on a global, non-personal scale, that’s just how it’s sucked on a mostly-immediately-personal scale, and I’ve even left out some of the immediately personal ones I think. and that’s just the shit I remember LOL jesus christ. I really need to do an effigy burning of this year.

[beepfuckingbeep]

Is this real? Or just a gazebo? - Eddie Kaspbrak fic

Hey all! This is my first IT fic. I told myself I wasn’t going to write anything until I read the book but then this lil headcannon came about and I was inspired to write. And as i’ve learnt from writing for a few years now, when you are inspired and have an idea just fucking write. 

So this is a little Eddie character fic around his reaction to finding out his medication is bullshit. Let me know what you guys think and if you want to see more from me. I will also be open for requests.

Could be taken as Reddie or just friends being bros. 

He couldn’t believe he had been such an idiot, all these years he had been living lie after lie and it took some sassy chick at the pharmacy telling him the truth for him to actually find out. 

Eddie looked at himself in the bathroom mirror. He looked like absolute shit. But he guessed that was to be expected after you fight off a demon clown monster thing.

It had been a week since they had all defeated it and Eddie still wasn’t able to sleep through the night without waking up screaming. The trauma was still fresh, that was all. He knew the nightmares would become more and more rare until they disappeared altogether. He had faith in that.

What he didn’t have faith in anymore was every single medication his mother tried to give him. She hadn’t taken too kindly to her son calling her out on her crap. She refused to give up and when Eddie got home after his ordeal in the sewers, he found his medicine nicely stacked on his bed side table. Already 110% done with everything, Eddie had simply picked up all the pill bottles, walked into the bathroom and emptied the contents into the toilet before flushing them away. Down into the sewers with the rest of his problems.

But one failed attempt hadn’t slowed down Sonia Kaspbrak. She had replaced all of his medication three times so far that week. Each time Eddie had flushed the pills down the toilet and thrown everything else out in his trash can. Every chance she got she would try and convince him that he needed the medication. That he was sick without it. But he knew she was wrong, the fucking labels on his pills confirmed this. They had no proper name, no instructions, nothing that other pills had. He had seen some while at Bill’s house the other day. It was all so obvious in hindsight.

Eddies watch beeped, drawing his attention away from his thoughts and towards his left wrist. It was 11am, time to meet up with Bill and Richie. 

They were planning on heading over to Stan’s place to try and convince him to hang out with them. He had turned down their last two attempts and the boys were starting to get worried. Sadly Mike and Ben both had thing to do today, Mike had a lot of chores he had been skipping out on to catch up on and Ben had some family thing. 

Shaking his head, Eddie cleared his thoughts and focused on finishing getting ready. He opened the bathroom cupboard behind the mirror and groaned at its contents. All he had wanted was his fucking comb but he was met with the all too familiar pills. He could not be bothered dealing with it all now, so with more force than necessary Eddie slammed the cupboard shut and stormed out of the bathroom and back into his room. 

He sat himself on his bed and quickly put on his sneakers before standing up again and heading out. Just before he left his room he sighed and took the fanny pack off his draws, quickly checking his mum hadn’t snuck in any meds (which she thankfully hadn’t), he then reluctantly clipped it around his waist.

While he was done listening to his mother’s bullshit, he still couldn’t shake his fear of germs that she had drilled into him. And he hated it. He felt so stupid, so weak that he still couldn’t even go outside with his friends without thinking of all the germs out in the world, how he could catch a hundred different things from just a simple outing. He detested the fact he didn’t feel safe leaving his house without the stupid fanny pack around his waist.

But he knew one day, one day he would be able to forget all of his irrational fears his mother had given him. One day he would be free. He had already made some progress down in the sewers, but then he had high off adrenaline. It was different now things were back to what passed as normal. But Eddie knew that day was a long way off. 

It would take him longer to get over his fear of germs than the nightmares.

“Eddie where are you going?”

Eddie completely ignored his mother as he walked through the house and out the front door, slamming it behind him. It hurt him too much to talk to her. He didn’t know how he could ever grow to trust his own mother again so he just ignored her. He knew he couldn’t do it forever but it was a temporary fix.

With too much on his mind for a kid his age, Eddie picked up his bike and headed towards where his friends had agreed to meet.

It had all happened so fast, one minute he was biking peacefully with Bill and Richie, rolling his eyes at one of Richie's jokes, when he suddenly found it hard to breathe.

Eddie shakily inhaled, trying to calm his stupid mind.

‘It was all bullshit. I’m not sick. I can breathe like a fucking normal person!’

But it didn’t work. Each breathe in took more and more effort as Eddie’s chest constricted under the simple effort to breathe.

Soon his arms gave out and he fell with his bike onto the ground in a pile. He felt the skin tear on his arm and legs as he grazed them on the hard asphalt. He didn’t spare the pain a thought, he didn’t even give himself a chance to thank the universe for making sure he didn’t land on his already broken arm. 

He couldn’t think past his own nagging thoughts as he tried and failed to breathe.

‘Fucking loser Eddie Kaspbrak can’t even breathe right. Still can’t get over the stupid bullshit your mother fed you? Just fucking breathe! I can’t believe you can’t fucking breathe. So fucked up you can’t even do something so simple.’

Richie had just been about to ask Eddie if he was okay when the small boy tumbled to the ground with his bike. Both Richie and Bill stopped and jumped off their own bikes in order to try and help their friend. 

Bill was closest and made it to Eddie’s side first, swiftly lifting Eddie’s bike off the poor boy and throwing it to the side.

“What’s wrong with him?”

Richie asked, his voice much too serious for his own liking. He knelt beside Bill and watched as the other boy opened Eddie’s fanny pack.

“H..he’s h..h..having an asthma ah..attack.”

The answer seemed so obvious to Richie, it wasn’t an uncommon occurrence for Eddie to have an asthma attack. But what had him worried was the fact Eddie hadn’t reached for his inhaler or even stopped fucking biking.

“Bill hurry up!”

“It’s n...not he...here.”

Without hesitation, Richie pushed Bill out of the way so he could take up the space directly in front of Eddie. In one swift, fluid motion, Richie pulled an inhaler out of his own pocket and shoved it into Eddie’s mouth.

“Breathe when I tell you to Ed’s okay?”

Eddie gave a weak nod back, giving Richie the okay to start.

“Breathe in....”

After Richie spoke he pushed the top of the inhaler, releasing the medicine into Eddie’s body.

“Breathe out.”

They repeated the process three more times before Eddie’s breathing finally returned to normal.

“You okay Ed’s?”

Eddie looked up into Richie’s eyes and saw just how worried his friend was.

“Yeah. Yeah i’m fine.”

“Good. Now what the fucking is wrong with you, you idiot!”

Eddie was taken back by Richie’s sudden outburst. It wasn’t entirely angry, he could still see the pure look of concern in his eyes.

“What?”

Richie sighed as he saw how nervous Eddie was and decided then to quiet down a little.

“Where is your inhaler?”

Eddie froze at the question. Quickly he looked at away from Richie’s eyes, only to meet Bill’s equally concerned ones. He drew his attention back to Richie and sighed as he answered.

“I got rid of it. The pills are bullshit… i just thought it was too.”

Eddie looked down at his hands, ashamed. He was still a fucking idiot, he couldn’t do anything right.

“Eddie yu..you should’ve ch...checked before…”

Eddie’s frantic voice quickly cut off Bill.

“How?! The only person who would know is my mother and I can’t trust her anymore. I can’t trust my own fucking mother with my health!”

Eddie choked back a sob.

“Hey Ed’s. ED’S.”

Richie’s yell brought Eddie back out of his thoughts. The look he gave Richie broke the taller boys heart. He looked so lost.

“We will figure this out yeah? Even if we have to pull some super secret spy mission and break into the doctor's office to find your medical records. Actually we should totally do that. We could all have cool code names and I would flip through every doorway..”

“Thanks.”

Richie completely stopped in his tracks and was left speechless by the single word. Eddie had a soft smile on his lips now and damn was Richie proud he was the one to put it there.

“For now take this.”

Richie handed Eddie the inhaler and Eddie placed it neatly into his fanny pack.

“Why did you have that by the way?”

Richie flicked a hand in the air to indicate it was nothing.

“Don’t you remember back when you gave us your spare asking one of us to hold onto it just in case something happened to your one?”

Eddie gave a soft nod with an raised eyebrow, prompting Richie to continue.

“Well to start off with, Stan, Bill and myself passed it around. But then it just kinda ended up always being with me so I just kept it safe.”

“Richie, I gave you guys that inhaler like three years ago.”

Richie smirked at this.

“And aren’t you glad i’m such a hopeless romantic that I held onto it all these years. It is a token of our love Eddie my boy.”

As he talked, Richie’s voice grew more and more dramatic. Soon he was standing with a hand over his heart and his other on his forehead.

“For I would always know, one day my prince would need me and I would use the magical object to save his life and win his love.”

Bill was trying, and failing, to hide a snicker. Eddie simple rolled his eyes but smiled at Richie nonetheless.

“Just my luck my knight in shining armor would be a dirty trashmouth.”

Richie grinned down at Eddie and reached a hand out to help the smaller boy up. Eddie rolled his eyes fondly and took the hand, brushing himself off once he was finally back on his feet.

“Let’s h...head to St...St...Stans. Yu.. you can fix yourself uh..up there.”

It was as if Bill’s words had finally sparked the part in Eddie’s brain that felt pain and he was now hyper aware of the grazes on his arm and legs. He winced in pain and that did not go unnoticed by Richie.

“Good plan big Bill! It isn’t that much further so we can easily walk.”

Before Eddie could protest and say he was perfectly able to bike the rest of the way to Stan’s, Richie and Bill had both started walking.

“Hurry up Eddie spaghetti!”

Eddie quickly picked up his bike and started to catch up to his friends.

“Don’t call me that!”

[poorlilbeans]

Keep Fighting (through this damn fic) (part seven? i think?)

i’m so sorry this took so long and it’s not even that long >.< idk man i struggled so much with this section i’m sorry. there will probably only be like two more parts after this one so like thank god you’ve almost survived my long ass fic good job <3

“Skater Katsuki Yuuri appears to have hit the wall on his winning streak, sustaining a significant leg injury after falling at the first competition in this year’s Grand Prix series. Fans marvel at the rapid rise and fall of the late bloomer, while others speculate about the fairness of his success. Many wonder if his sudden bout of sickness was due to a drug, or rather, a steroid overdose, supplied by ‘coach’ Victor Nikiforov to solidify last year’s success. Will this be…”

“Fuck off!” Yuuri yelled, chucking his phone across the room. No one cares about this article. It’s not even well-written. I am not going to let this silly gossip get to me.

He was letting this silly gossip get to him.

“You okay?” Victor poked his head into the bedroom, perturbed by the sudden shout.

“Yeah, I was yelling at the Internet again. Ignore me. Sorry.” Victor made the obvious decision to not ignore him, but rather retrieved the wayward phone and climbed into the bed beside him.

“I saw that article too. You know no one’s going to take it seriously.”

“Still stings though.”

“Yeah,” Victor sighed. “You’re just going to have to get used to that bullshit. Do you want to post online today? Calm down the rumour mill?” Yuuri wrinkled his nose.

“I guess. Then I’m going to have all these random people tweeting at me and trying to talk to me.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“Yeah, kind of.” Victor chuckled at that.

“You don’t have to answer them if you don’t want to.”

“Yeah, but then I look like an asshole.”

“Or like a person who has better things to do than sit on twitter reassuring strangers of his well-being.”

“Except that’s not true. I absolutely do not have anything better to do, I just don’t want to because I’m an antisocial dickhead.”

“Hey! Don’t talk about my Yuuri like that!” Victor silenced Yuuri with a kiss before he could come up with any more self-deprecating comments. “You,” he whispered, pressing their foreheads together, “are not obligated to talk to random strangers online. You are not obligated to respond to every single message and at-reply. And, most importantly, you are not a dickhead or an asshole. Understand?” Before he could answer, Yuuri rolled away from Victor to cough, letting out a strangled groan as pain shot through his body. When the coughing fit ended, Yuuri didn’t move, afraid of the venomous, panging ache that would attack him if he tried to return to his previous position.

“I should grab you some ice packs,” Victor observed, stroking Yuuri’s shoulder.

“Heat first. Please?” was Yuuri’s choked response. “It hurts so bad.” He was facing the other way, but Victor could hear that he was holding back tears. It stung to deny him.

“Ice to bring down the swelling, and then heat to relax muscles. It will feel better that way.”

“How many hours ago did I take the acet-um… pain relief shit?”

“Four. We have to wait two more before you can have another one.”

“Fuck. Okay, fine. Ice. Anything.” Victor kissed his head before getting up to retrieve some ice packs, feeling irrationally guilty for not giving in and letting him do the heating pads first. It was so frustrating taking care of someone when everything hurt him. It felt impossible to make things any easier for Yuuri, especially when Victor had to put so much effort in to not letting on how worried he was. Yuuri would undoubtedly find a way to feel guilty about that, and working himself into a fit of anxiety was definitely not what his body needed right now. Still, it was incredibly hard for Victor to act cheerful when he hugged Yuuri and felt every one of his ribs, or when Yuuri described himself as feeling “relatively okay” while he was vomiting with a forty degree fever. He’d only been discharged from the hospital a day prior, but Victor was getting seriously impatient with the slowness of Yuuri’s recovery. Thinking on that, he slammed the freezer door just a little harder than he’d intended and brought the ice packs back to the bedroom.

Yuuri hadn’t moved from his awkward position. He was lying half- on his side and half- on his belly with his head hanging off the side of the bed. His face was still twisted in pain.

“I’m going to move you, alright love?” Victor breathed. “The ice will make it better. I promise.”

“Bathroom first,” Yuuri moaned, pain and frustration clear in his voice. It was a routine now. Victor would carry him as far as the bathroom door, and place him down on one foot, closing the door behind him. Yuuri was adamant about maintaining his privacy. He was perfectly capable of using the goddamn bathroom on his own. Today, Victor made a point of keeping his face as neutral as he could manage when Yuuri dissolved into pained whimpers at being moved. He was carrying a skeleton right now. A sweaty, shivering skeleton.

Just like always, he pretended not to hear the pained groans coming from the bathroom, and opted not to ask any questions when Yuuri shakily emerged nearly ten minutes later. He didn’t say anything as he laid him back onto the bed, elevating the broken leg and placing the now slightly melting ice packs on his joints. Finally, when they were situated and relatively comfortable, Victor spoke.

“What are you thinking about right now?” he asked, gently flicking a stray tear from the corner of Yuuri’s eye.

“Practice,” was his shaky response. There was a stretch of silence before he continued. “I want to go to the pharmacy as soon as the fever breaks. I need to find a small enough brace that will fit in my skate.”

“You should plan on healing before you get back on the ice, eh?”

“I know, I know, but like… there’s no way I’m missing this season. I’m getting the cast off in three weeks, and then I’ll have seven weeks of solid training to get myself competition-ready again.”

“Okay, so you have a game plan. Good. Just…”

“Just don’t freak out if it falls through,” Yuuri finished. Victor was ready to agree, but Yuuri wasn’t done. “Because it’s not the end of the world if I take some time off. Because lord knows as soon as I don’t suck anymore I have to get sick and hurt myself. I can never be good; I have to be sick or crazy. One or the other. As soon as I get better, if I get better, I’ll probably lose it again. That’s what has to happen, right? That’s the rules. That’s…”

“Enough.” Victor even surprised himself with the intensity of his voice. He certainly startled Yuuri, who paused his rant and choked on a couple of tears in shock. “I can deal with you being irrational. I can deal with you being a pessimist. But where did these rules come from? Since when do you blame the universe for things that happen in real life? That’s not like you.”

“Not like me? No, lying here covered in ice packs and sympathy, THAT’S not like me. Being carried everywhere is not like me. Freaking out over missing a season? That’s like me. Freaking out is definitely like me. Maybe you didn’t realize that- that I’m kind of an asshole that way. Maybe I’m just not as good as you…”

“STOP!” He shouldn’t have yelled. Shit, he shouldn’t have yelled. Yuuri was obviously delirious- Victor could practically feel him heating up by the second- and so much attention was being put toward his physical health that his mental health had gone pretty well unchecked through this whole ordeal. It wasn’t fair to yell. He had successfully stopped the rambling, but he assumed it was all still going on inside Yuuri’s head. He had curled up on his side, knocking off the ice packs. He always did like to be as small as possible when he was upset. “Okay,” Victor whispered, placing a light, hopefully comforting hand on Yuuri’s back. “Here’s what we’re going to do. You’re going to sleep for a while, and get down to a safer temperature again. I’m going to stay with you. If you still feel this way when you wake up, we can talk about it then. Alright?” Yuuri unravelled the ball he’d made himself into just enough to nuzzle into Victor’s waist, and Victor felt hot tears soak through his shirt.

“Can I have the heating pad now?” was Yuuri’s barely audible response. The rawness of his voice was like a punch in the stomach, and Victor bent down to kiss him. He tasted of mint, having insisted on brushing his teeth every time he was sick.

“Okay. I’ll get it.” Victor resolved to heat the sore muscles, but still place ice packs on Yuuri’s neck and forehead.  He settled into bed with Yuuri, bringing a few tissues to wipe away the leftover tears.

“I love you.” Yuuri’s voice sounded so desperate, like he was afraid Victor might forget and leave forever. Victor took his shaking, sweaty hand and was as serious as he had ever been when he said, “I love you too.”

[thebloodlinereigns]

Love Heals All Wounds (part 5)

Roman and Draya made their way through the hallways of the hospital and picked up his medication from the pharmacy before leaving through the doors of the hospital. Draya pulled the car around to the front after she loaded his things in the trunk. Roman stretched out in the back seat and leaned his head against the window. The ordeal had drained a lot of energy out of him and really all he wanted was to find the nearest bed and crash. His heart wouldn’t let him, It fluttered at the thought of finally being alone with Draya. She came over to the other side of the back seat and offered a pillow to prop his leg on for the ride home.

“I just figured that it would ease some of the tension. It’s not going to be the smoothest ride to my condo.” She said as she carefully slid the pillow under his knee. He reached over and placed his hand sweetly on hers.

”Thank you, sweetie, it already feels a lot better,” he said as he bit his lower lip before smiling. She looked up and a huge smile spread across her face. She leaned in as he drew in closer. Being mindful of his knee, she held her finger up to his lips before she pulled back. She shut the door and walked over to the other side to open the door. She gently turned his face towards her as she used the handle to pull herself up onto the edge. The two kissed passionately before she pulled away.

”We gotta get going, I have a whole season of Game of Thrones and snacks waiting for us back at my place,” Draya said as she closed the door to the backseat. She quickly went over to the driver seat. She started the car before shifting into reverse. She looked back as Roman looked on, still flushed as be thought of how lucky he was. He leaned back against the door and window as Draya drove. Draya thought about everything that she was feeling.

”Am I rushing things too fast? Am I overdoing it? Something tells me that he's everything I never knew I needed. His heart speaks to me in ways I've never felt before. I don't want to rush into anything too quickly. I never felt this complete in any other relationship. Is this even a relationship? Did I make a mistake of inviting him to stay with me?” The thoughts continued to race through her mind as Roman broke the silence in the car.

Roman and Draya made eye contact through the rearview mirror. ”I know that our first date didn't amount to much. It wasn't what you deserve. You are worth much more than Chinese takeout, Game of Thrones reruns, and a dude with a bum knee but you took a chance. You see something in me that proves that I'm worthy of your time and since the moment that I laid eyes on you, you've done nothing but go above and beyond to make sure that I am okay. You have cleared your entire schedule to take care of me just on a hunch that this may be something worth pursuing. This has been the most nontraditional start to a relationship that I've ever seen but I can see you have your doubts. Maybe I can clear some of those up for you, Draya, will you do me the honor of being my girlfriend? I see my future in your beautiful eyes and I can't let that pass me by. It may see to others like we're rushing but I see it as dating intentionally. We won't get everything right but us together, I see no wrong. You're everything I never knew I needed until this moment.” he said as he continued to look at her from the back seat. Draya looked down at the road before pulling onto the shoulder lane. She parked the car as she looked back at Roman. She tried her best to hide her tears but fought a losing battle.

”Can you read minds or was it that obvious what I am thinking? I never felt feelings as strongly as I do now. There's an electric energy here that draws me to you and I can't break it. I'm scared of my feelings but what you just said offers so much clarity. Yes, I'll be your girlfriend,” she said as a large smile appeared on her face.

”It was just a feeling, I couldn't help it. It was something I wanted to ask you in the parking lot right after you said hello, ” he said as he grinned. He blushed slightly as he looked at her. ”Come on, Game of Thrones awaits us, ” he reminded her before he leaned his head back against the window. Draya turned the car back on and drove home. They pulled up to the condo just as the pain peaked for Roman. His jaw clenched as he breathed heavily. He sat there for a moment whilst Draya parked. She got out and opened the door opposite of Roman. She looked at the anguish on his face as he slid forward. She grabbed his crutches and handed them to him. He took them as he stood, bearing no weight on his right leg.

Draya closed the door and headed for the front door. She opened the door before he walked through it. He looked around briefly at the cozy, modernized home. He stood in the middle of the room as he thought of where he could make it to. ”Where do you feel comfortable with me being?” he asked Draya.

”The bedroom is better. The couch is too small for you to be comfortable. One injury is enough for you right now. It's the last door on the left. Go ahead and settle in while I bring in the stuff from the car. You have a fancy ice machine in there I want to play around with.” She said unable to contain the excitement in her voice. Roman chuckled to himself as he shook his head. He went towards her bedroom and managed to get somewhat comfortable. The pain became increasingly bothersome as he laid there. A few moments later, Draya appeared with the supplies and his medicine. She handed the little to him with a water bottle before she sat down on the floor beside the boxes she got out the car. He looked down and saw letters he wasn't familiar with. Draya pulled the contraption out of the box and his eyes widened with concern as he was uncertain what the machine would do.

”Draya, what is that? It looks like a small torture chamber. Am I really supposed to use it?” Roman asked as he sipped the water. ”So, this bad boy is a continuous passive motion machine. For some, it does seem like torture cause it slowly bends and straightens your knee to help manage swelling, stiffness, and pain. That being said, it will still hurt a lot so be warned. It's set at a specific degree and you work your way up. For you, they said you can do it for 30 degrees for 8 hours a day. I'll give you a break to ice it and then we start back up with it. I feel like you're gonna hate me but I'll be here with you.” She said as she set up the machine in the bed. She carefully removed his brace and placed his leg onto the machine while he laid back, still very uncertain of what was about to transpire. She gave the medicine some time to kick in before she turned the machine on. She removed her shoes and climbed into bed next to him as it began to do its job.

The next few hours were rough on Roman as he continued to use the machine that unlocked his own personal hell. Through the drug-induced haze, Roman still felt every once of the pain being inflicted by this machine. His pride would not let him show the pain in front of Draya. She tried her best to comfort him whilst he remained tense. She held his hand and stroked it softly with her thumb. He pulled her in close as he endured the pain. “Maybe I can hook the ice machine up to your knee while it’s on that thing to help the pain.” She said as she started to get up. He looked up towards the ceiling and mouthed, ”THANK GOD” whilst her back was turned. She sat down on the floor next to box before opening it and applying it to his knee. She plugged it in and the first hint of cold caused a soft groan to escape his lips due to the initial shock. He relaxed as the ice worked its magic. She climbed back in bed and settled in next to him as he took her in his arms. He kissed her forehead as they watched Game of Thrones before they drifted off to sleep.

Hours later, their phones were blowing up. The constant buzzing woke Draya up. She adjusted her glasses and went to see what the commotion was. She looked at her notifications to see several mentions from her twitter feed and a few missed calls from Naomi. Another notification was from WWE, she clicked the notice as it read, ”The Miz has harsh words in response to his last encounter with Roman Reigns”. She clicked the link to see what the fuss was about.

The Miz appeared in the middle of the ring,running his mouth as usual. ”Welcome to the most must-see

wrestling talk show in WWE History, WELCOME TO MIZ TV, hosted by the new face of WWE. You've guessed it, THE MIZ!” he said as he introduced his segment. ”I have an inside scoop from a very reliable source regarded your golden boy, Roman Reigns. You see last night, my highly effective plan of single-handedly ending the career of Roman Reigns was carried out without a single hiccup. I'm quite sure you've seen the footage but for those who hadn't, I direct your attention to the nearest monitor, ” said as the footage played. ”Look at my handiwork, I physically debilitated Roman Reigns in front of the entire world. Who cares about the thrill of a win? You know what's better than the feeling of scoring a pinfall? The feeling of ligaments being torn from the bone and hearing the ligament snap under the tension of a figure four leg lock or better yet the disappointment in the eyes of his family ringside as they watched him struggle to the back because his pride wouldn't let him be helped back. Oh, bravo! Bravo, we demand an encore of this stellar performance! It's more entertaining than most of the promos you've cut this entire year. Here's the thing though, Roman was scheduled to appear tonight. But no one's seen him, I wonder why that is? Hmmm, perhaps it's related to the fact that Roman underwent surgery for a torn MCL and ACL injury today. That could also be a reason why someone else is missing backstage as well. There's no logical reason that Draya would not be here tonight except- anywho, I digress. Yes, Roman Reigns has been sidelined indefinitely. That's right folks, that means I have created my own opportunity to take my rightful place as the NEW face of WWE. For those who didn't know, Roman was on his way to challenging for the NXT Championship pretty soon and now that he's out of the picture, WWE rewarded me with the opportunity to replace him in the running as we enter a tournament to determine the number one contender. One day after taking him out, I'm already reaping the benefits!” he said as he smirked while staring into the camera. The camera zoomed out to plan the vocal audience. The arena filled with boos as the crowd realized that Roman would not be competing any time soon.

Draya stepped out as Roman continued to sleep and called Naomi back. After the second ring, Naomi picked up. ”GIRL! Did you watch it? You're trending on Twitter. #WhoIsDraya is the 3rd most trending hashtag! People are desperately trying to figure out who you are. I hope they don't go too crazy. You know how those internet fans can be, ” Naomi teased.

”Roman is going to flip when he sees this. I don't know how he found out. No one knows anything at this point, at least no one outside of management. Maybe it’s all apart of the storyline. I don’t know but now I’m actually his girlfriend. I’ve never dated a wrestler before.” Draya said before Naomi’s scream radiated through the phone.

“WHAAAAAAAAT?! What did you- how does Miz - rewind and start from the beginning!!!” Naomi exclaimed. Draya proceeded to tell her the details of her encounter with The Miz and what had happened after Roman’s surgery. “You ain’t say nothing! Girl, that’s the things y’all need to tell me! Look at you, you secured the man in a matter of 2 days. I knew y’all would be perfect. Just stay cool and levelheaded. Right now there will be a buzz but it will die down. It’ll be okay. Go ahead and get back to him. I’ll let the fam know he’s being well taken care of. “ Naomi said before hanging up.

Draya looked back at Roman who was just waking up. “D, what’s up? What’s all the buzzing for?” He said as he breathed heavily before sitting up in bed. Draya crawled back into bed with her phone in her hand. She curled up under his arm. “Roman, I need to tell you something but I need you to stay calm.” She began as she propped herself up on her elbow before looking up at his eyes. His brows knitted in concern before he asked, “what’s up?”.

“When we were at the arena, The Miz approached me and instructed me to tell you that he will stop at nothing to make sure you're out for good. He said nothing and no one is off limits, not even me. At the show today, he made some comments about how he took you out and basically told the crowd that we may be together.” Draya said in a low tone as she realized that Roman was already getting upset. He rubbed his face with his hands before wrapping one arm around Draya. “Show me,”he asked calmly. Draya looked down at the phone and pulled up the video. She played it as Roman listened to what The Miz said. The anger built up as each insult was delivered. When it got to the point where he mentioned Draya, Roman was beside himself. “Who gave him the right to involve my personal life in this? Our relationship is just that, OURS! He has no right to threaten you or mention you in our feud. I don’t care about the shit he said about me. He’s crossing a line. Where’s my-,” he said as he started to try to get up. He groaned as he struggled to get his leg down. “Ah-d- Damn it, ah,” he said as he tried to stand. Draya quickly made it over to him.

“Roman, think this through. If we get down there and he gets his hands on that knee. You’re done. You’re career might end because you let emotions get the best of you. Is this what you want, to let everything you worked so hard for go down the drain? Calm down, lay back down. There’s another way to get revenge.” She said as she thought quickly.

“Draya, you’re not a wrestler. I don’t want you getting hurt on my behalf because I’m not there to protect you.” Roman said as he tried to balance himself before sitting back down on the bed. “It’s all a mind game and I’m feeding into it. You’re right. I’ll relax, get through this, and kick his ass when I get back to the ring. I swear if he lays a hand on you, he’s going to-AHHH SH-,” he said as he desperately tried to relax.

“Here, take some more medicine. Here’s your water. You have to relax. No more talk of wrestling or The Miz. Just us, alone. I’ll make dinner and just chill for the rest of the night,okay? Don’t forget the exercises she mentioned at the hospital.” Draya reminded him as she left the room to prepare dinner. She regretted telling him what happened but knew she had to be honest with him. She thought about the situation as she cooked. She made spicy chicken breast with stalks of asparagus, mashed potatoes, and steamed vegetables.

Draya set the table and placed the plates on the table. Roman came just in time to eat. ”How did you know it was ready?!” she said astonished by how quickly he recognized the scent. ”Sweetheart, I have an innate ability to find food when I'm hungry, ” Roman replied with a chuckle as he settled into a seat. He managed to get his brace on and propped his knee up on the nearest chair. The two sat down at the table and ate.

The two free closer as the days passed. Whether it was short walks on the beach, random movie nights, or just them sitting and talking, the bond grew stronger. Every day, Roman committed more and more time to therapy as he gained more strength. He would leave therapy and then come home, only to work out more. He pushed himself to get closer to that ring and it was definitely paying off. Draya had finally returned to work a month after Roman’s surgery. She walked into the condo after a rough night at Full Sail. She tossed her keys on the counter and walked around looking for Roman. ”Ro, are you here?” she asked as she went to the bedroom.

”No! Don't come in here yet! D, I promise it's worth it! Give me like two minutes.” Roman called out as Draya tried to open the door. ”Okay?” Draya answered as she thought of what he could possibly be doing that would require him to block the door. She let her hair down front the curly messy bun and shook it free. She walked to shower and turned it on as she let the water get warm. She played music on her phone and started to sing along as she removed her clothes. She stepped into the shower and the warmth of the water melted her stress away. She washed her hair as she heard a knock at the door.

”Your surprise is waiting for you when you get out D. I hope you like it,” Roman called out as he stood behind the door. Draya continued to sing as she finished her shower. She turned the faucet off as she grabbed a towel to wrap herself in. She gathered her things in her arms before tossing them into the hamper. She walked to the bedroom and found candles lit with large floral arrangements around the room. She looked around in awe as she walked towards each one, inhaling deeply to savor their sweet scent.

Roman appeared in the room wearing a fitted white t-shirt with dark denim jeans. His hair was slicked into a bun. He stood using his crutches as support with a bottle of pink Moscato, her favorite wine. ”I watched the show tonight and given all the chaos that happened, I figured that you would be exhausted. Don't worry, I handled dinner. I just want you to sit back and relax. It's just my way of saying thank you for keeping me motivated this past month. It's not easy dealing with me when I'm away from the ring and you have handled it with so much grace. I appreciate you. I went to the doctor today, don't worry I had Jimmy take me so I didn't drive. Anyway, I'll just show you, ” he said as he leaned his crutches against the wall. He still had his brace on as he slowly walked over to Draya. There was still a slight limp but a vast improvement since he had been non-weight bearing for the past month. He wrapped his arms around Draya’s slim waist as he leaned down and kissed her cheek. He smiled as he continued, ”He cleared me to start increasing what I can do in the gym. I'm healing a lot better than expected right now and I'm on a good track. So I'm working to get full extension, flexion, walking normally again, and finally getting to work out. Oh yeah, no more crutches. I can just use one to keep people from knocking it but I'm doing good without them. My brace is at about 15 degrees. I'm excited but I'm even more thankful, I couldn't have made it to this point without you getting on my ass about using those little machines, ” he kissed her passionately on the lips as he held the one arm around her waist and the bottle in the other hand.

Draya’s heart felt like it was going to explode as she saw Roman take his first steps. She smiled while she kissed his lips. She pulled away slightly before pulling in close. ”I'm so proud of you, Ro. You worked hard to get here and I'll still be here every step of the way, ”she said as she pulled away. ”I'm going to get dressed now, then we can eat. I feel like I need to get somewhat dolled up because you look pretty good right now, ” she teased as she looked in her closet.

”Well, I mean I can finally take you on that special date to Nick’s if you want to go. I had some other plans in mind though. You put on whatever you like and meet me in your backyard.” Roman stated as he headed outside with the bottle of Moscato. Draya threw on a maxi dress and some sandals before meeting him outside. He stood behind the chair waiting for her to walk over. He gently scooted her chair for her as he sat down in the other chair. The table was lit by candles as their plates sat in front of them.

”I'm impressed, you did all of this?” Draya asked as she looked at the very appealing salmon served with rice and creamy sauce on top with shrimp and vegetables on the side. Roman smirked as he began to did in. ”I wish I had cooked this, now seeing your reaction. No, I had Jimmy pick it up while we were out. I just warmed it up but this isn't all that I had planned, ” he said as he smiles before taking the next bite.

”What else did you have in mind Mr. Reigns?” Draya replied with a raised brow as she continued to eat. She was blown away by the amount of thought and effort that was put into this gesture. ”You're raising the bar pretty high with dinner and bouquets of flowers. Tread lightly before I expect this to become the routine, ”she warned as she giggled. The two finished their dinner as they talked about her day at work. He listened intently, nodding appropriately as she continued with her story. She laughed as she held her neck, trying to soothe her aches.

Roman collected their plates and took them in the house before he returned. He took her by the hand and blew out the candles outside before leading her to the bedroom. He carefully removed his brace and jeans before putting on shorts. He replaced his brace and helped Draya out of her maxi dress. He guided her to the bed and handed her one of his shirts to wear. Once she slipped it on, he sat down in bed and patted her spot. She sat down and he began to massage her shoulders firmly to loosen the knots. He continued as she worked her neck around. ”Damn D, you're really tense. Don't they have other trainers they can work the hell out of?” he asked as he continued to work his magic. She moaned as he managed to find the right spot.

”Stay there, right there, ” she said as another content moan escaped her lips. ”Oh m- right there. Ah-” her voice broke slightly as she felt pleasure flood her body.

”Lay back, D, ” Roman requested as his hands slide over her curves. He worked his way down to the small of her back as he kneaded her back with slight pressure. He massaged her legs and worked his way down to her feet. He grabbed some lotion off the nightstand and rubbed his hands together as he continued to pamper her. He massaged her legs as he rubbed the lotion in. Roman took his time and paid special attention to ever knot and tense spot in her body. He felt her body relax under his hands and she became silent. He continued to rub her feet as he glanced back at her resting with her eyes closed.

”Babygirl, tonight wasn't about me at all. No sexual intentions, just wanting to give you the special treatment your body deserved. Sex, I will wait for because you are worth the wait. You are a phenomenal woman and I want to engage with you mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. You're a force to be reckoned with and one of the strongest I've seen. Thank you for allowing me to witness you take in the world. I appreciate everything you do and have done. Sleep well beautiful, ” he said as he held her close. Her head rested on his chest while he wrapped his arms around her.

Roman and Draya was on a steady path. This past month offered it's challenges but the two continued to grow. They carried on the relationship based on their terms. The intimacy continued to grow as they continued to blossom as a couple. Physical intimacy wasn't his primary concern as he still wanted to figure out who she was as a person. The fact that they spent so much time together allowed for a deeper understanding of each other's personalities, they were developing their own little groove by really developing their foundation. They were building a solid union and discovering each other. Roman and Draya used this unfortunate injury as the gateway to healing each other's past wounds and insecurities.