#it was a nice trip -- my cousin was getting married and we were also moving two of my siblings into new living spaces

[good-beans]

🏡

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

Oh Baby, Oh Baby - chapter 5: What Makes a Family

Chapter summary: Luke and Penelope make the trip down to New York to visit his family. Things do not go as expected.

Content warning: Luke's parents are kind of assholes in this chapter. There are discussions of homophobia, as well as parents just generally not accepting their children.

Chapter word count: 2786

Total word count: 8212

Can also be read here on Ao3

Thanks to help from Derek and Savannah, as well as the rest of the team, Luke and Penelope were able to get moved into their new house by the end of Penelope's first trimester. Everything was progressing as it was supposed to, so the pair decided it was as good a time as any to go down to New York to visit Luke's family. They knew Penelope and Luke were expecting a baby, they were the first to be told after the team, but since this situation had been… quick and unexpected, they hadn't actually met Penelope yet. So as not to overwhelm the expectant mother on her first visit, it would only be Luke's parents, his sister, her wife, and their daughter. 

A tall woman with pale skin and chin-length brown hair–Luke's sister-in-law–was the one to open the door when they arrived. She stared at Penelope for a moment before blurting out, "You're white!" And then, quickly, "Oh my god! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to say that! It's just that when he said your name was Penelope Garcia, this was not what I expected!" 

Penelope laughed it off. "Don't worry, he made a similar comment when we met." 

She laughed and then turned to Luke. "Are white girls the Alvez kid type?" 

Luke rolled his eyes, but laughed anyway. "Oh my god, Melanie, shut up."

The two looked at each other for a moment, each with a slight smirk, before wrapping each other in a hug. "It's good to see you again, Luke," she told him, genuine emotion evident in her voice. 

"You too, Mel." 

Melanie turned to Penelope and hugged her as well. "And you! It's so nice to finally meet you! Luke's been telling us about you for years!" 

Penelope cast a look at her boyfriend. "Years?" 

Luke felt his cheeks warm. "Can we continue this conversation inside?"

"Yes, yes, of course, come on in," Melanie said, waving them in. “Elanor, Antonio, Liliana, Isabela, they’re here!”

The first set of footsteps they heard was the pitter-patter of a child running down the stairs. Isabela, Luke’s niece, came into view and catapulted herself into her uncle’s arms. “Tio Luke! You’re here!” 

Luke wrapped his arms tight around the little girl, swinging her around. “Hey, Isabela!” Luke exclaimed, peppering kisses all over her hair. “Dios mio, I’ve missed you, you’ve gotten so big!”

“Of course I did, I’m nine now! I’m a big girl!”

Luke pretended he didn’t know that fact. “Nine? You are a big girl!” He put her down then, and put his arm around Penelope. “Isabela, this is your Tia Penelope. We’re going to have a baby, and they’re going to be your cousin. Your Primo or Prima.”

“I know! Mami and Mama told me!” She looked up at Penelope and waved. “Hello!” 

Penelope waved back. “Hello! Can I give you a hug?”

The little girl didn’t even bother responding, she just wrapped her arms around Penelope’s waist. 

The rest of the adults joined them then, Luke's parents Elanor and Antonio, and his sister Liliana. 

Hugs and introductions were given all around, Luke and Penelope settled their things in the guest bedroom they’d be staying in for the course of their visit, and they sat down for dinner. Not long after dinner was done, Isabela had to go to bed, so she gave her goodnight hugs and was on her way. Once she was asleep, the adults congregated in the living room and Elanor made tea for those who wanted it. 

“So, Luke, Penelope,” she said as she sat down with her own cup. “You never told us; when’s the wedding?”

Penelope looked at Luke, confused, shocked, and maybe a little angry depending on what his answer to her question would be. "Did you say we're getting married?" 

Luke looked equally as confused as Penelope. "Um, no, I didn't." He turned to his mother then. "Mamà, Penelope and I aren't getting married, at least not any time soon." 

Elanor's eyes went wide. "You're not?" 

Penelope shook her head. "No, we decided it's not what we want right now. Maybe a few years down the line we'll change our minds, but not now. We don't want to get married to fit societal expectations just because I'm pregnant. That's not healthy." 

"You have to get married," Elanor exclaimed, sounding a little angry. "This is not how things are done!"

"She's right," Antonio agreed. "If you don't, your child would be illegitimate. Penelope, you'd hardly be a part of the family." 

"I understand where they're coming from," Melanie interjected, trying to diffuse the situation. She could see the pain on Penelope's face and the fury on Luke's, and she didn't want things to end in a shouting match like they had in the past when his parents made comments like this. "It's up to the couple to decide whether or not to get married, and if they've decided that they don't want to get married, that's probably the best decision for them to make." 

Liliana turned to her. "Are you serious?" 

Melanie looked stunned and stared back at her wife. "Are you?" 

"We fought for years for people to be able to get married, for us to be able to get married, and now they're throwing away something that's always been available for them because they 'don't feel like it?'" 

"You're right, we fought for our right to get married because it's what we wanted. We fought for people like us to be able to get married if they wanted. You and I of all people should understand that no one should have their marital status dictated by others or societal norms." 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to start a fight," Penelope said, standing. "And actually I'm feeling pretty tired right now, so I think I'll turn in. Goodnight." 

Luke got up to follow her. "Penelope–"

"No, Luke, please, stay and catch up with your family, I'm just going to bed." 

To his credit, he listened. 

Penelope went upstairs, and the remaining adults stayed silent, no one knowing what to say. After a few minutes, Luke worked his jaw and stood up, clearly intending on following Penelope up to their room and going to bed as well. 

"Luke, no," Melanie said. 

He looked at her, clearly feeling torn, and the pain was obvious in his voice. "What do you mean, 'no?'" 

"I mean you stay here, sort this out." She pointed at Liliana, Elanor, and Antonio. "I'll go talk to her." 

"But–" 

"Luke," Melanie implored. "I've been where she is. Please. Let me talk to her." 

Luke worked his jaw again, but nodded. "Okay." 

Melanie made her way upstairs to the room Penelope and Luke were sharing and knocked on the door. 

"Luke, I'm fine," came Penelope's voice through the door. "Go talk to your family, really." 

"Oh, he is," Melanie replied. "And that is not a conversation I want to be around for. Actually, it kind of is, it'd be fun to see him rip into them for treating you this way, but that's not the point. The point is: I'm not Luke, I'm Melanie, so can I come in?" 

The surprise was evident in Penelope's voice. "Oh! Um, sure, yeah." 

Melanie opened the door gently and flashed the other woman a tight-lipped grin. "Hey. I am so sorry for everything that went on down there, especially Liliana, I am stunned she reacted the way she did, and I am not here to try to excuse anyone. Luke wanted to follow you up here, but I told him to stay and deal with his family. I've been where you are right now, so I wanted to talk to you. Can I sit?" 

Penelope scooted over on the bed to make room for Melanie. "Yeah, sure." 

Melaine sat beside Penelope and took a deep breath before beginning. Even years later, this story was still hard for her to tell. “The first time Liliana ever brought me home, Elanor and Antonio were not the most accepting of the fact that their daughter was with another girl. Not that we weren’t exactly expecting that, I mean old catholic people are going to old catholic people, right?”

Penelope let out a tear-laced laugh. “You got that right.” 

“Liliana and I got to a point in our relationship where we would have gotten married if we were allowed, we knew we were it for each other, we lived together, I mean we were even wearing rings. We were each other’s family. My parents had accepted her as part of ours, but I did not receive the same treatment from Elanor and Antonio because we weren’t married. When Liliana and I decided to have Isabela, we used IVF. I think it’s obvious whose egg we used and who carried her.”

Penelope nodded. Isabela looked just like Liliana, and therefore just like Luke, but much younger and female. 

“We were hoping that would change their minds, especially since I was the one carrying the baby, but they still wouldn’t. They said that since I wasn’t biologically or legally related to anyone in the family, I wasn’t family.”

“That’s really awful, I’m so sorry,” Penelope told her. 

“It was awful. Thank you. Liliana and I were at a complete loss, we had no idea what to do, and that’s when Luke stepped up. He absolutely tore into his parents, telling them to get off their homophobic high horse, that Liliana chose me and that should be good enough for them, and to accept that I was permanently a part of their lives and family because if they didn’t accept that then Liliana would probably cut contact with them—which he said she was well within her right to do considering the way they had been treating me—and if that happened then they would lose him too because there was no way he’d stand behind parents who treated his sister and her family so horribly. That was the wake-up call Elanor and Antonio needed, because they ended up apologizing to me and Liliana not long after.”

Penelope’s eyes widened. “He said that?”

Melanie nodded. “He did. I was absolutely astounded, and then he came up to me privately later. He said he said he would always stand beside us because he loves his sister, and she loves me so he loves me too, that no matter that we weren’t legally related, I was his sister too, and I mean you’ve seen him with Isabela. He adores her. Has since the day she was born. He’s the best uncle ever, and I know he’s going to be an amazing dad, Penelope.”

Penelope was on the verge of tears. “I know so too. I’ve seen him with our friends’ kids. His godkids and mine. He’s amazing.”

“He really is. Did he ever tell you he was Liliana’s best man at our wedding?”

“No, he didn’t.”

“Oh, well he was. There was not a dry eye in the audience as he gave his speech. You’ve got a really great guy on your hands, Penelope.”

“I know I do.”

Melanie wrapped her arms around Penelope’s shoulders. “Luke always stood up for me and my family, so I’ll always stand up for you and yours. You’re his family, and he’s mine, so you’re mine too.”

Penelope leaned into the hug and wrapped her arms around Melanie’s waist. “Thank you.” 

***

Meanwhile, downstairs, Luke was livid. “I can’t believe you guys would say those kinds of things. I mean I thought we got over this ten years ago. And you said them to her face?”

“I’m sorry, Luke,” Elanor said. “But one grandchild out of wedlock was bad enough—”

“Mamà!” Liliana reprimanded. “Are you not over this?”

Elanor turned to her daughter. “I’m sorry, I know it wasn’t your fault, I know you would have gotten married if you were able.” She turned back to Luke. “But you two have the option readily available, I can’t see why you wouldn’t take it?”

“Because we don’t want it right now!” 

“You are raising a family with this girl, yes?”

“First of all, she is not ‘this girl,’ she has a name, and it’s Penelope. Use it. And yes, I am raising a family with her. Because I love her and I want to be with her.” 

“And you don’t intend on ever separating from her?”

“No, I don’t.” 

“Then why wouldn’t you two get married?”

“Because having children is expensive enough, you should know, you’ve had two. Why would we spend so much on something unnecessary, especially when it’s—and I cannot stress this enough—we do not want right now? Right now. We haven’t said we’ll never get married.”

His parents’ eyes lit up. “So you might end up married after all?”

“Maybe, but definitely not before the baby comes. If it happens, it won’t be for years yet, and it may never even happen. And if it doesn’t, that’s fine, because it is up to us and none of your business.”

“How are we supposed to show our faces in our church if they found out our son and his girlfriend chose to have a child out of wedlock?” Elanor demanded.

“That doesn’t matter!” Luke exploded. “Because it’s none of their business either! And if you decide that you’re ashamed of your son’s family, of your grandchild, then that is on you. I love Penelope, and the way you treated her and spoke to her was awful and I will not stand for it. If you keep it up I will be cutting off contact. No one treats my family that way.”

“We are your family, Luke,” Antonio said. 

“So are they! Penelope and our baby, they are my family too. I chose them, and I will continue to choose them. That is that.”

Melanie poked her head down the stairs at that moment. “Hey, we’re all good up here, I’m going to bed now. Night, all.”

“Goodnight, Melanie,” Luke called back up. “Thank you.” He turned back to face his family. “I’m going to bed too. Goodnight.” He stood up, but before he left, he said one final thing to his sister. “I have never done anything but stand up for you and your family, would it kill you to do the same for me?”

He went upstairs and got ready for bed, then cuddled in beside Penelope. Instead of her spooning into him like he was used to, she flipped over and kissed him. 

“You’re an angel, did you know that?”

“What do you mean?”

“Melanie told me about everything that you did for her, how you stood up for her. You’re amazing.”

“I love my parents, don’t get me wrong, but I was not going to stand for them treating Liliana and Mel that way. And I didn’t stand for them treating you like that either. I told them the same thing. I will cut off contact with them if they continue to say those kinds of things.”

“Luke I’d never want you to have to choose between me and your family.”

He silenced her worries with a kiss. “You are my family, Penelope.” He placed his left hand on her stomach. “Both of you are. There’s no choice here. So don’t even worry about it, okay?” He kissed her once more on the mouth and then once on the forehead. “I love you. Let’s get some sleep, okay?”

Penelope nodded. “I love you too.” She cuddled into his chest, and they were both asleep within minutes.

***

Breakfast the next morning would have been incredibly tense had it not been for Isabela and her youthful naivete and joy that kept them all laughing. No one had forgotten the fight from the evening before, but no one was talking about it yet either. Elanor offered to make some baby blankets, which Luke and Penelope graciously accepted, but that was it.

After breakfast, however, Liliana came up to the pair of them privately. “I cannot apologize enough for the way I behaved last night. Luke, what you said really struck a chord with me. You’re right, all you have ever done is stand up for me, and I should have done the same for you. Mel and I had a really good talk about it last night, too. I am really sorry. I will do better. I am so happy and excited for you guys. And welcome to the family, Penelope.”

Penelope smiled and hugged her. “Thank you.”

Liliana hugged her back, then hugged Luke. “I will talk to Mamà and Papì. I promise. We’ll get them on our side soon enough.”

The three adults laughed. Things weren’t perfect, but there was time.

[oomslokop]

PINK

i was going for a drive to orange for hannah's wedding

she was getting married to a nice french dude or is that a garçon with sad eyes

one day i was riding in the action bus with them and for the whole trip he put his sad head on her shoulder

meanwhile claire was digging into my nails absentmindedly trying to clean them

that hurt

we were traveling in chloe's old subaru sedan. chloe was from orange

it was during a pit stop at a petrol station that i realised i didn't bring my good shoes that i was supposed to wear for the wedding

they were cream close-toed faux leather mandals that i didn't know were faux and i got them custom-made at one of the (back then) trendy jamet cobblers at perbanas

i was kinda glad i forgot them i started to think they looked shit. like shithousery fuckety fuck fuck unquiet not even luxury

it was during another pit stop this time at a lookout that i realised i also forgot my beatles-style four-buttoned prada suit

i opened the trunk and it wasn't there

it might've been subconscious but how was it SUBconscious when it was so fucking obvious

that i was sabotaging this trip subconsciously deliberately

we had a late lunch at chloe's parents' house and i borrowed my wedding outfit from the dad

they fit perfectly except now in a white safari shirt i looked like a white lotus dick

the only thing i had that was mine was a levi's dark navy twill pants that at a glance passed for a formal-ish chino because the fabric was kinda shiny

we stayed in errol's, hannah's dad's house on a hill in orange with a view of a single jacaranda tree we could see from our bedroom window

the house was all blonde wood which made it feel both unfinished and welcoming

errol was a late-blooming artist who spent most of his life working at the arnott's factory in orange

hannah was also an artist, went to the art school in canberra, and had had a group show at a tiny gallery in surry hills that i wanted to see but claire, her cousin, my girlfriend then, didn't

i went to see it one afternoon making sure no one else was there

she did pretty things with onion paper, tiny fragile things that resembled colonies or crumpled shredded skin

there was also an incompleteness to her works that was charming and welcoming

i wonder if she ever made it in the art world

after the beautiful outdoor wedding under a grey sky, me shivering in the cold sans jacket, lloyd, claire's dad got us to move out of the wooden house and camped out in the bush not too far away, i think it was still in errol's property

he even set up a portable shower, a massive army green canvas water tank that he hung off a thick eucalyptus tree branch, with a shower head at the bottom

i thought of telling him a mandi would be much easier to set up and much more water-efficient but i restrained myself

that happened later

i don't know to this day why we had to sleep in a cold tent when we could've stayed in the charming blonde wooden house

i don't think i even fucked claire in the tent

lloyd made good eggs for breakfast, so there was that

later on i wrote a poem about a tree, a pond, no ducks, and winter for my first collection of poems and called it orange

have you seen sidewalks of london?

people who stay outside for too long find inside not a welcoming place to be

[loorain]

Sims 4 Fontenot Legacy - Playdate

As promised, Sigrid gets the girls (and Juno!) ready for a day of fun in the sun! She meets Coty and Milo at the rec center, the kids immediately head to the play area while the two parents get a moment to greet each other.

Sigrid: Always good to see you, Coty!

Coty: Same here! How's married life treatin' ya?

Sigrid: Well it's only been about 24 hours, but so far so good! Of course, our wedding night consisted of bedtime stories and late-night potty trips, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Coty: I can only imagine. Milo was a cranky mess after a full day of partying. He had fun though. We both did.

Sigrid: We're so glad you were able to make it last minute. Having more parent friends is always nice!

Coty: Yeah. Well, I'm glad Milo has some friends to grow up with. I'm surprised you came alone with all three kids, though. Just getting Milo to put his shoes on the right feet is a struggle.

Sigrid: Well Robin and Sabrina helped with that part. Sabrina had to go into the restaurant today, and Robin needed to run a few errands. He'll come a little later though.

Coty: Ah, so I'll get to see the Grinning Groom after all. Awesome.

Coty: They really are a good bunch.

Sigrid: That they are.

Coty: It's just a shame we live so far away... Milo being an only child and all, I worry about him. He doesn't have cousins or siblings to play with. I'm especially worried when he ages into a kid. Will he feel lonely?

Sigrid: Being a single parent must be hard. I'm lucky I have the help I do, but I also had to grow up fast. I lost both of my parents young. Then it was just me and my sisters and brother.

Coty: That must have been very hard. How did you and your siblings manage?

Sigrid: Honestly, I don't know. I think my mind blanked out a lot of that stuff. I wasn't the oldest, so I was able to do that a little more easily. But we definitely went through our hardships. We lost Virginia, and Yolanda took over caring for three of her four kids, and my brother Harley went off on his own the moment he could... we don't hear from him much. It's complicated. There's love there. Just looks a little different. But I wanted different for my kids. That's why I make so much effort for them to spend time together with all their cousins, and Milo too.

Coty: I admire that. You're a strong woman, Sigrid. I just want to be strong for Milo.

Sigrid: You already are. I see it. Milo sees it too. He'll appreciate it when he's older.

Coty: Thanks. Guess I needed to hear that.

Sigrid: Parenting is hard, no matter how many kids and how many hands are on deck! Give yourself some grace.

Coty: You're right, you're right. Just... it is hard. All alone.

Sigrid: ...Well, could you ever get in touch with Milo's mom? Is there any hope of that?

Coty: No. None.

Sigrid: And your parents?

Coty: Dad's already passed. My mom is definitely supportive, but she can only do so much from where she is. I moved to Sulani to try and understand myself more and give Milo a change of environment. Just thought the islands would be a good place for him to grow into himself. My mom always said my dad would return to the waters, something about them being "healing".

Sigrid: Well no matter what, you've always got the Lay bunch to keep you company! And Juno, too. And the good thing about Rabbithole Elementary is that all are welcome!

Coty: That's true, I suppose.

Sigrid: You and Milo will never truly be alone. We'll look out for each other. I'll always help in any way I can, and I know Robin will second that, too. But for now, why don't we just start with school plans? I've got some pictures of the facilities, state-of-the-art!

Sigrid continues her chat with Coty while the kids play together. Little Audrey, being the absolute sweetheart she is, is so ecstatic to see her bestie Milo. These two are two little peas in a pod.

Alma and Juno have a great time as well! It's evident to both adults that the four little tykes will be friends for life, and they'll obviously have to meet up again. Luckily for everyone involved, the wedding season is quickly changing into birthday season, so everyone will be back together very soon.

Eventually, as Sigrid promised, another familiar face shows up at the rec center after his errands are complete. Robin, having had to run around all morning, is still energized and excited to see his girls, Juno, and Coty and Milo.

Robin: Ah, there you all are! Looks like everyone's having fun out here!

Sigrid: Hi, honey!

Robin: I don't think we've properly introduced ourselves. Hi, I'm Robin.

Coty: Coty, so great to finally meet you officially. Great to have you join the fun.

Robin: It definitely looks like a lot of fun is being had!

Sigrid: Audrey and Milo have been attached at the hip for most of the day.

Robin: Oh, is that so? Shouldn't be surprised with those two. Audrey never stops talking about him. Has she been sharing him with Alma and Juno?

Sigrid: Oh yes, they've all been chasing each other around all day.

Coty: Milo asks about his friends too. Won't shut up about them. Good to know the feelings are mutual.

Sigrid: Well Alma's more of a girl of few words, but she shows her care in her own way.

Robin: They're twins, but very different. They'll keep you on your toes. Anyway, thanks for keeping my wife company with all the kiddos while I was gone.

Robin turns to Sigrid, greeting her properly.

Robin: I hope the kids haven't been too much to juggle today.

Sigrid: Oh they're fine, having fun chasing each other and splashing around. We've had a very relaxed day overall.

With Sigrid and Robin getting lost in their own world for a moment, it seems Coty has quickly become the third wheel. He is less than amused but manages to fix his expression before either can notice it.

But at any rate, the playdate continues on without a hitch! The kids have a great time and the adults plan out when they'll see each other again, which will be very soon since the twins will be aging up in a matter of days! A new phase of life is set to begin!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Fontenot Legacy is back! After a much-needed break, your favorite group of sims is finally returning! Expect more updates coming soon!

[raspberryconverse]

I had a weird emotional moment today and I just want to write about it.

It's a very long story, but if you want to read it, I'd appreciate feedback.

So I have a cousin who is 2 years older than me. Honestly, she was more like a sister to me than my actual sister (who is 3 years younger than me, so it's definitely a different dynamic). Her and her mom did live with us briefly when she split with her dad, but eventually they got their own place. She went to a different junior high, but we went to the same high school and were in orchestra together (she played cello, I played violin). She also made me join Key Club (basically she wouldn't give me a ride home that night if I didn't).

Even when she went away to college, we remained pretty close. She gave me her drivers license when she updated her address so I could use it to get into bars. I visited her and she visited me. We were just very close.

We kind of fell out of touch as she got older. She got married really young and got pregnant with her first child when I was 21 (I was actually the first to know because she called me to tell me she wasn't going to be able to celebrate my 21st birthday). I floundered throughout my entire 20s and she lived kind of far away, so our relationship just kind of petered out. I remember I was the last one to find out she was pregnant with her second child. I was going to wish her a happy birthday on Facebook, but my dad had told me she had the baby. Nobody told me.

One thing I think kind of was the end of our relationship was her mother. Our grandparents had gotten sick and her mom was their primary caregiver and power of attorney. Our grandpa had gone into memory care and our grandma had ended up with bedsores while he was in the hospital. My aunt blamed me for it because I had gone on a trip and my dad and uncle, who also lived with my grandparents, hadn't taken care of her properly (which clearly was my responsibility as a 20-something 🙄).

Eventually, our grandpa died and for some reason the funeral director did a google search for him and came across my blog. He showed it to my aunt and she lost her shit about it. She read the whole thing. I started it when I was 17 or 18 and documented my college years. I had realized I was bisexual when I was writing in it and I had a lot of sex when I was in college and wrote openly about it (not the dirty details, but definitely talked about having sex). My aunt lost her shit about it. She hated that I had said less than nice things about my family (they were hoarders). She just had a lot of opinions about it and because I lived at my grandparents' house, she made my life hell because of it.

Our grandma spent months in a nursing home recovering from her bedsores and when she came home, my aunt came over 3 times a day to care for her. I still lived with them and my aunt had so much animosity towards me, she taunted me and did everything she could to make my life difficult. She'd yell "QUEER!" at me when she saw me outside. She'd block me in the driveway so I had to drive over the grass and through the alley to leave for work. Once, I was taking a shower so I could go to work and it just so happened to be at the same time she wanted to empty my grandma's commode, she left the commode outside the bathroom door and yelled at me when I got out. How dare I take a shower so I could go to my job, right? It's not like there wasn't a second bathroom in the house or that it couldn't wait 15 minutes for me to finish showering 🙄 I used to go to a zumba class once a week and I eventually ended up showering at my mother's house because I didn't want to try to take a shower while my aunt was there. It got so bad, I ended up moving in with one of my knitting friends who was recently widowed.

I'm not sure what was going on with my cousin throughout this whole ordeal. I'm not sure what, if anything, that my aunt said to her about me. I know my cousin had no problems with my sexuality or my sex life. Hell, she read my blog. I brought my girlfriend home for Thanksgiving one year and we (me, her, my cousin and her husband) all hung out in the empty apartment above my aunt's house. My cousin even said, "I don't think anyone [in our family] would have a problem with [me being bisexual]." Clearly, she was wrong.

I do remember messaging my cousin once because her mom was causing a scene (over something I did, but I honestly don't even remember what it was). It was basically me saying, "IDK if your mom has been talking about what's going on here, but she's lost her damn mind." She threw a kitchen garbage can down the basement stairs (I had set up a little corner of the basement to live in at the time) and ripped the thermostat out of the wall. Once she threw the garbage can down the stairs, I called 911. The cops came and so did my aunt's boyfriend.

I remember talking to my mom about the situation, probably around the time that I asked her if I could shower at her house after zumba, and I said to her, "I thought that she and Uncle Beaver [yes, I have an Uncle who's nickname is Beaver] were the only sane ones in the family." My dad's older brother is a story for another day, but he was... something. My dad's older sister is currently in a nursing home because she has brain damage from a freak accident while doing drugs. My dad has OCD and is a hoarder. My mom's reply to me was, "No, she's nuts too. Beaver is the only sane one."

When my grandpa died, my cousin came to the funeral with her son. We went to a restaurant afterwards and I had to leave early to go to work, so the waitress gave me my food to go. As I was leaving, my aunt was outside smoking (she was a chainsmoker) and she sneered at me, making me feel bad for even getting the food. And you know what was really cute? My cousin told me that her son was worried I wasn't going to get my food. Nobody else thought it was uncalled for for me to order food and realize I wasn't going to have time to eat it with them because I had to go to work. Just my aunt.

The first time I ever really understood how trigger warnings could really be helpful was when I was going through my Gmail account to delete things because they had emailed me to tell me I was running out of space. I came across this email and for the first time in my life, I felt a sheer sense of panic when I couldn't possibly be in any danger. This email had been sent to me by my aunt 9 years prior to me coming across it and my aunt had been dead for 3 years (she died of kidney cancer in 2017). She sent me this with photos she took of my "room" in the basement before she trashed it while I was at work. Sure, it hadn't been clean, but she threw things all over the place.

(for reference, Mancow was a sort of shock jock radio host in Chicago and I had gone to school for radio broadcasting, graduating just in time for the economy to tank in 2008)

So I don't even know what I'm trying to say with all this. I'm still friends on Facebook with a lot of my cousin's friends and what prompted this was one of them posting about how they all got together recently. I remember awhile ago I tried to tag my cousin in something and her name wouldn't come up. She was no longer in my friends. I searched for her and she was no longer anywhere. I interpreted this as she might have blocked me. I don't know why she would have, other than the bad things I might have said about her mom (which were really watered down). I didn't name her, obviously, but if my cousin read my posts, she would know it was her mom. I've done searches before on a browser where I wasn't logged into Facebook, but couldn't find her (mostly because her last name is Young, so she's definitely not the only one with her name). When I saw this post, I asked my spouse to search for her and they also couldn't find the right person. I was actually tempted to ask another friend who commented on the post if he could tell me if my cousin was tagged or not in the post, but decided that would be really weird. My spouse thinks she might not be on Facebook anymore, but part of me still wonders.

I think my uncle might still have her number, but I don't. I really wanted to invite her to my wedding last year. I really miss our relationship. My spouse says I should just email her. Her Gmail is her initials and last name, so it's very likely she still uses it (as opposed to something silly). But part of me can't bring myself to do it. I don't know how she felt about her mother dying. I obviously was relieved. Hell, I was relieved when our grandma died, not necessarily because I didn't care. To be honest, I was really devastated by her death. I didn't see her much the last couple years of her life because my aunt moved her in with my uncle and I knew she'd be around a lot. My grandma meant the world to me. She was the one who taught me to knit and cross stitch. I'd talk to her on the phone all the time when I was in college. She was a very headstrong woman because her father died when she was young, so it was just her mom and two sisters together during the Great Depression. Yes, she was a hoarder, but she was an amazing woman and I loved her so much. But her funeral was a relief because I knew that was the last time I would ever have to see my aunt again. And it was. She died 3 years later and didn't even want a funeral or obituary.

If you've made it this far, please tell me your thoughts. Should I email my cousin? When my spouse made this suggestion, my thought was that I felt bad that I didn't think to do that when we were getting married. I was so convinced that she had me blocked and that she was angry for me saying not so nice things about her mom that I didn't even think she'd want to go to my wedding if I contacted her. Also, I tried to add her on LinkedIn and she never accepted, which kind of solidified the "my cousin hates me because I hated her mom" theory. But now that it's been over a year since I got married, I almost feel like I don't have any good reason to email her, other than seeing photos of her and wondering how she's doing. I actually have a friend from college who was pregnant with her son at the same time that my cousin was pregnant (they even have very similar names) and every time she posts about him, I think of my cousin and her son. I haven't seen any photos of him since he was maybe 6 and he's a teenager now. I just really miss her and would love to reconnect with her, but I just don't think I could handle the rejection if she actually hates me now. One of our other cousins unfriended me (he's in the military and is a little conservative, so I can see why) and the other blocked me because we got into an argument on Facebook. And I don't know what happened with my other cousin. I'm friends with cousins on my mom's side, but I barely know them because they live in Florida and I've lived in the Milwaukee/Chicago area my whole life. But this cousin was basically the older sister I never had and didn't live with. And I miss her so much. I kind of forgot how much until her friend posted those photos.

[princessresurrection13]

Melancholic Evening

There is so much going on with my family, that it is hard to process. I must admit I am still confused, on some details. I know this post is going to be all over the place, so bare with me. For the last couple of days my family made plans to rent a cabin for Christmas and Thanksgiving, yes again. Since I tend to ramble, I'll try to get to the point. During a phone call with my aunts on speaker phone, one of my aunts said that my cousins baby should not have to pay. My other aunt(the aunt who acts like me) lost her temper and I said that yes they need to pay for their baby. She also said that the check is spilt between all the family, because it was the most fair option. Well my other aunt began to cry and she hung up on the family. In essential my aunt wanted the family to split money and pay for the baby's part. The problem is that my cousin is an engineer and he "supposedly" makes good money. I say supposedly because his mom has always exaggerated about my cousins. He could be making good money, but not the way my aunt describes it. I feel like she is inflating his salary. Anyway, at this point we are not going to a cabin for the holidays. My aunt told my mom, that she ruined the trip, and that if my other aunt continued to act that way, she would prefer to stay home.

The main problem is my cousins baby mother. Yes I will name her because, I do not consider her family. We were fooled, yes including me, that Jasmine was a nice girl. That she was like our family, from a home that taught respect and morals. Jasmine has been very disrespectful to our family, we have done nothing to hurt her and we welcomed her with open arms. Jasmine has kept the baby away from our family which has deeply hurt my aunt and grandma. She belittles my aunt and expects free babysitting services from my grandma and my cousins sister. Jasmine and my cousin did not invite my mom to their baby shower. I told my mom, what she needs to do is make my cousin pay for a nanny or a babysitter, since he makes good money. My cousin has always been a cheapskate ever since he was little. He loves money, but prefers to spend other people's money, and not touch his own. I think now, knowing Jasmine's nasty arrogant attitude, she thought she found a man to take care of her financially when she got pregnant with my cousin. Well this dumb girl thought wrong because he is extremely cheap, she is not getting a cent out of him. I think I forget to mention that Jasmine right now is pregnant with another baby. We think she got pregnant again because my cousin did not purpose to her and did not marry her. Also that way she can claim child support if it comes to that or welfare. My grandmother wants to tell Jasmine off for her nasty arrogant attitude. Jasmine acts like she is better than my family as if she is filthy rich. She stuck up her nose to our family, when she clearly knows that she is not well off. This dumb girl is planning to go back to college while pregnant and get a job. My grandma says that Jasmine is doing this because she is bored playing housewife. She sees her friends going out and partying and wants to do the same. My grandma said that one day, Jasmine and her trash parents and family, came into her home and acted like they lived there. They went into the kitchen, moved things around and ,went to the bathroom with out asking for permission. You do not disrespect my grandmother this way or my family for that matter. Jasmine and her low class ghetto family went into my grandmothers home and had the audacity to act like they lived there and made a mess. My grandmother is furious that my cousin does not tell Jasmine anything. He allows her to disrespect his own mother. My aunt did not raise him like this. We were raised to have good morals, and to be humble, and be respectful. Jasmine is a shame to our family, this girl is embarrassed by my family, when she should be embarrassed with herself and my cousin. My cousin and Jasmine had the nerve to act poor that way, we would pay for them. Using their baby boy for sympathy, it is so shameful and disgraceful. My cousin should be disgusted with himself, for allowing Jasmine to put down his own mother and disrespect my grandmother. My grandma gave him money for college, and this is how he repays her. He never paid my grandma back, the utter disgrace. He then expects an elderly woman to care for his child free of charge, and also his own sister! This not even the half of it, and I am not going to keep thinking about them because both of them make me so mad.

On another note, my mom was telling stories from her childhood. Silly stories about boys pulling her curly her and teasing her. Stories about how one boy would write her letters and leave flowers on her desk. How she would feel butterflies in her stomach. How all of this was innocent and sweet. This for some reason reminded me of myself, I think because I am a lot like my mom. Sometimes I wonder if back in high school if I had gotten therapy and took medication, I wouldn't have asked him to be my boyfriend. Or even if I did, I would have healed from the rejection and it would not have left my heart shattered. I would have been very outgoing like how I am now, I would have excelled. One important thing is that even though I suffered so much growing up, I created a very close relationship with Jesus. I would cry in the bathroom in the dark and I would pray to him, to save me from this horrible pain. I grew strong through my suffering. I still don't understand why things happened the way the did, but I grew so close to God and my faith has become so strong. I think that part of my life had to happen in order for me to realize I suffered from depression and to heal and to get closer to God. But I still don't understand why I still feel like that was love. I think its because I cried so much and experienced so many emotions at once, that it left a permanent scar on my heart, and left me traumatized. I'm just having another one of my melancholic nights. I feel a weight off of my heart writing all this down. I still wish I had the answers even though the divine plan for my life would not change. Anyway I am going to enjoy the rest of my night, sweet dreams!

[into-wonderland-caroline]

Not that anyone is asking or I think many if any at all will read this but I want to write a blog giving a short overview story of my life so far. Here goes: My family is originally from new York. My mother lived and grew up there with her parents and younger sister and my father grew up in new York only in a different way. He never knew his bio parents and spent his childhood-the age 18 in and out of foster homes and group homes . My parents met in high school - oddly enough my mom is actually a year older than my dad. They began dating her junior year his sophomore year. Both were good A B students their entire highschool career and both athletes my mom and dad both ran cross country. Dad played basketball mom played volleyball. They both enlisted to serve in the armed forces after they graduated high school and they both graduated high school with honors. They got engaged middle of my dad's senior year of high school and were married at the courthouse that summer following his high school graduation. Fast forward through each of them completing basic training and now they start a family. Theo was the first child. Two years later came Liam . Mom and dad knew they always wanted three children but for whatever reason they had trouble getting pregnant after Liam so I was not born till 5 years after Liam. When I was 2 we moved to New Mexico and Dad was sent over seas. At the the age of 4 we had to hire a live in nanny because mom was being sent off as well. This nanny lived and moved and stayed with our family from the time I was four until I was 11 almost 12...in those years she abused me mentally, physically and sexually (actually she brought men into our house who sexually abused me while she watched). To this day my brothers swear they had not a clue our nanny was being so horrible to me and I do believe them that they didn't know. I finally told at age 11 and that situation blew up and ended with chaos and police reports and it was horrible. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD and reactive attachment disorder. Later I would also have added generalized anxiety disorder, OCD, Anorexia, and Orthorexia . Also I forgot to mention from 4 - 11 my family did move a few times. We moved from New Mexico to Michigan then to California then North Carolina. We spent a good bit in north Carolina when I was 11. That is where my mom's sister, Aunt Mel lived and Uncle Bryan had just recently died suddenly and unexpectedly of a heart attack . It was truly awful. My aunt Mel is 4 years younger than mom and here she is already a widow with 2 little girls. My cousins, Kenzie who was only a year younger than me 10 and then Grace, 8 years old. Our family spent a good couple years in north Carolina. I liked it there and I got to get really close with my cousins. The summer I was 12 my whole family- my dad, mom, brothers, aunt and cousins we took vacation and went to Hawaii. It was incredible and beautiful and the best 2 weeks of my life! On that trip is when the plan was developed for Aunt Mel and her girls to basically just move with our family. Aunt Mel has a mobile work from home all on the computer job anyways so that way we could be there for them since uncle Bryan passing and Aunt Mel could be there if my parents got deployed or something they'd have someone trust worthy. Not nanny. So that has pretty much been life since. Shortly after vacation (like 2 months after) we moved to Florida. I developed anorexia and Orthorexia and did my first stint in residential treatment at 14 years old. It is very difficult for me to talk about life and relate to others when I feel like I have lived a kind of life most do not relate to. Home school, both parents in the service so they are both gone very often, nannies, moving a lot, am I spoiled with nice houses and things and animals yes.....do I have a very fun close bond with my brothers, cousins and pets also yes. Do I have crazy respect for what my parents do? Yes. Doesn't make it easy.

Other than that some other randoms about myself I love vintage fashion 20's-80's . I want to be a novelist. I love to read. Love black and white photography. I 'm a music enthusiast pretty much listen to everything from jazz to rock to classical piano to hip hop to pop to punk. Anything except country music please. I love nature...going for runs, walks, hiking, biking. I also enjoy playing soccer and volleyball and tennis. I enjoy dance. I take a couple classes. I take ballet, jazz, lyrical, and hip hop. I play piano . I want to learn to play the cello I think that would be so cool. Anyways that's it for now

[blogevaawrites]

Keeping to the schedule

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: angst, sad, marriage, divorce, smut

Summary: After seven years of being married, two daughters and a difficult divorce, they try to understand what went wrong and why they let that happen.

Part I   Part II

I tried to process the whole information he was sharing and for the first time I believed I made a mistake. I saw it then, why he has been incredibly mad at me.

Sure, at first our separation was hard, but now he was looking happy, at least that’s what he shows me. I also was well, I still loved him but deep in my heart I thought it was the best for both of us. Now everything seems so wrong.

“There was another way. You could have told me everything, we could have dealt with all of that. You let this happen to us.” I said, full of resentment. His face was different then, he came here full of concern and then all what I was seeing was frustration.  

“What are you talking about? You filed for divorce. You decided unilaterally when we were done. You ran away from our marriage at first obstacle. This is not my fucking blame.” His words were like a knife in my skin. I never took it like that. All what I could see was his unhappiness and coldness, in my heart I was doing the right thing.

Tears fell down through my cheeks uncontrollably, our seven years together seemed thrown away. I could feel him moving around the room, he was trying to calm down himself.

“I thought you were being distant because you blamed me for the infection, and then when anything seemed to change, I thought you weren’t happy and that you didn’t know how to leave me.” I said after I got my shit together. I saw him shaking his head, I wasn't sure if he wasn’t satisfied with my words or if he was answering the accusation.

He didn’t response right away, he took a few minutes to breathe loudly.

“I felt ashamed of being the one who needed help after what you went through.” He said without looking at me, he was staring the wall behind me. “I could have never ever blamed you for something like that.” He finished. His hand went to caress my face before pulling me to his embrace.

“I’m sorry” I babbled between tears.

I let myself cry my eyes out in his arms. I felt like I threw out our life because I couldn’t put aside my anger to talk our problems out , like I put my daughters through all of that because I got mad at my husband. I knew he wasn't innocent at all but guiltiness took over my whole body and couldn’t shake it off.

His hands ran all over my back and the back of my neck; the feeling of security invaded my body and the need of get out of my own thoughts grew.

He was so close to me that I couldn’t help kissing him.

His hands didn’t take long before holding my face closer to him, in the perfect position to let our tongues connect with each other.

Needing for air we broke the kiss but not for long, he kissed me again letting his hand go to hold me up from my butt. I just could follow his actions; I didn’t want to do anything else. He took me to our bedroom quickly, he sat at the edge of the bed making me straddle him.

Without leaving my mouth, he moved the strips of my shirt away from my shoulders, leaving my breast on full display for him. His hands played with my nipples before taking them in his mouth. I just could moan, moving my hips to find some friction against his bulge. He showed me his excitement pushing my hips even closer to him.

“I love you so much” he mumbled against my collarbone. His words made my noxious thoughts hunt my mind, I knew he loves me, I loved him too; it wasn’t the first time he said it after our divorce, but it was wrong now. I stood up quickly, he looked at me confused while I tried to put my shirt on again.

“What’s wrong?” he asked extending his arm to reach me.

“Who am I now? Your sidechick. Isn’t works in the other way? From a sidechick to a wife?” I said with a sardonic laugh, rubbing my eyes, trying to concentrate again.

He laughed, laying down on the bed. I looked at him completely horrified by his reaction. He took his phone from his jeans and scrolled around it for a few seconds before handing it to me.

It was a kind of a contract, an agreement to release seven pictures along with a misleading and suggestive headline.

“Meghan asked me because her team want her to be related to a certain kind of people.” He explained, I knew that this is part of his job, and he was used to it before we got together.

“It’s a pap walk.” I said understanding what he meant, I wasn’t familiar to it because he hadn’t done one since we met.

“Yeah, I’m sorry. That’s what I wanted to tell you when I came the last time.” He took my hand to bring me closer to him while he continued explaining “I shouldn’t have agreed to it, but I realized of it too late and I wanted to talk to you before the pictures got release. I didn’t want you to feel disappointed or mad and don’t worry! I already asked her and Meghan to shut down any rumor.” He guided my legs to straddle him again. “I tried to bail out of it after what happened between us, but I just couldn’t.”

“Okay.” I felt relieved. I wasn’t ready to see him with someone else, and thank God, he said he wasn’t ready to date again.

“Let’s just put you to sleep, okay?” He said caressing my head and taking my hair away from my face. He saw my face and quickly he explained to me his change of mind.

“The girls are with Scott, but he has a flight to catch in a couple hours. I need to pick them up. Okay?” he said forcing me to look at him. “Hey! Listen to me I will call you as soon as they fall sleep, will that be okay?” he asked again.  

I nodded, getting up. I thought he was going to leave right away but he did not. He uncovered the bed for me to get in and laid next to me for a few minutes.

“You will always be the one. I promise.” He slurred against my temple, after kissing it.

He left the room without waiting for an answer, he must have thought I was sleeping because he tried not to make many noises.

After a few hours, my phone rang, and I didn’t wait a second to respond.

“I wasn’t sure if you were going to be up.” he said. I could hear him closing a door. I haven’t been in his new house, but I know his style very well, enough at least, to imagine it.

“I’m a light sleeper.”

“I know.” He let go a sad laugh. “I wanted to call you early, but Anna was interrogating my ass about my quick trip of tonight.” he said cooling off the environment.  

“Oh! Yeah! She can be very tough, it’s probably a phase.” I said with a smile, remembering the last time I had a quick conversation with our neighbor, and she thought I was dating him.

“Yeah! I guess, but I think we should check on her, maybe she’s experiencing anxiety because of the changes or something like that. I’ve been reading about kids with divorced parents can suffers these kinds of things.” I knew he was just worried about them; I was too, but right then I felt guilty, I felt like I did this to them.

“Okay” I murmured.

I was excited about his call, I wanted to figure it out what we could do to save this, but maybe it was too late. We held on everything for so long, and now it’s probably just too late.

“What do you want to do?” he asked calmly, completely away from my thoughts.

“I don’t know.”

“Tomorrow my sister is going to the lake house. She wanted me to take the girls, but I could let them go with her and we could hang out. I don’t know, we could have a kind of a date and talk, we could try to sort this out.”  

“Okay.”

“Is everything alright?” I knew he was asking because of my monosyllabic answers.

“Yes, I’m just kind of sleepy.” I didn’t want to talk anymore.

“Okay.” his voice sounded disappointed now. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Fine.”

“I love you” he said after a few seconds quiet.

I didn’t know what I was supposed to say, I loved him, but it felt like I was accepting everything, it felt like I was saying “yes, I broke us, our family”.

“Me too”  

I couldn’t say much else. I said bye and hung up.

He picked me up at 7:00 p.m, he told he wanted to spend the day with the girls because they wanted to spend the night over there with their cousins. We decided to just have a dinner at his house in order to have more privacy and also, we could be in a kind of neutral environment since he doesn’t feel it like home, and I don’t even know the house.

“You want a tour?” he asked as soon as we got in the house. I nodded and followed him through the house. I wasn’t wrong about this style, the house it was almost a copy of ours, and it felt weird.

“It’s very similar to ours, isn’t?” I said softly, I wasn’t sure how he was going to take it.

“Yeah, I know, Scott said the same thing, but I don’t know, I’m living here, and this has to be home now.” He said and all at once I felt the guiltiness coming back to my body, it was like I kicked him out of his home.

“We have your favorite for dinner” he said completely unaware of my harmful thoughts.

“Great.” I didn’t want to spoil any possible progress.

He took my hand guiding me to the dinning room. We had a nice dinner, just talking about our past, when we met, when I got pregnant with Anna, when we took her to Disney for the first time… we had a happy life.

We talked about everything, but we didn’t talk about why we let this happened to us. It was like we weren’t seeing the big fat elephant in the room. After the dinner he took me outside to have the dessert in front the fireplace.

“Are you okay?” he asked worried, I wasn’t being very talkative, and he knows me well enough to let it pass.

“Yes.” I said taking a spoon of mousse.

He took my dessert from my hands.

“You sure?” he asked, forcing me to look at him by my chin. I just could nod; I didn’t know what else to do.

He took my chin to his head, kissing me deeply. He got his body closer to mine and his hand went to hip and the other one didn’t leave the back of my neck. I kept to his leading until I felt his hand get under my dress, touching my naked thigh. I pushed him away from me softly. I stood up and rubbed my face trying to find the right words.

“This is not my fault.” I dopped. He smiled in confusion.

“Well, I guess it’s not, I started to kiss you, but…” he started to say.

“I didn’t break us. I may have been the one who made it official, but you decided not to tell me what was going on.” As I said that his eyes went dark. I knew he was ready to fight back, I have seen those eyes too many times.

“It wasn’t exactly an easy journey, I couldn’t…” he was accepting that he blamed me. His voice also changed; it wasn’t the same voice he used to used when we were married. This one was ironic, rough, and mean, the one he use since we were divorced.

“Mine wasn’t easy either! It wasn’t just a rough patch for me, Chris. I felt you were abandoning me, and you knew what I was feeling.”  My eyes were getting wet, and I tried to do everything not to cry.

“How I could have known that?” he sounded irritated, not just because he was talking louder but he also because his head was resting in his hands.

“Because I told you, Chris! I asked you to come back home million of times, and you rather take our daughters to the other side of the world than come back home with your wife.” I said, recalling the last time I asked him when he was going to be back. He didn’t answer, instead of that he set a whole plan. He made Scott flight to Boston to pick up the girls and then take them to Japan where he was filming his fifth film of the year.  

“I was working…” He said with a different voice.

“That’s bullshit and you know it.” The air got cooler; we weren’t yelling anymore. He wasn’t looking at me when I started to walk out.

“I don’t think we can do this.” I said, ready to leave.

“We have to try it.” He caught my attention.

“Emma and Anna will be alright; they are fine now.” I’ve always thought that keeping kids in a unhappy marriage it’s way more dangerous that have a civilized divorce. I knew he was worried about them, but it wasn’t right.  

“Not because of them, because I love you and I know you love me too.” He was right.

“Maybe it’s not enough anymore.”

“Yes, it is! It has to be! I don’t want to be alone the rest of my life and if it’s not with you I will be, don’t you see it? It’s been almost a year and I still thinking of you as my wife.” He stood up to get closer to me.

It broke my heart that he was right. I can’t imagine myself with another man, and it could be just a matter of time, but I honestly didn’t think so.

“How could this work? We’re going to end hating each other.” I said verbalizing one of my biggest fears.

“We won’t. I promise.” He said pulling my body to his arms.

 @moonlacebeam @denisemarieangelina @lovebittenbyevans @popteest @aubageddon91 @hey-diddly-ho-neighborino @impala1967666 @firoozehmoon

[xanadontit]

If my mom got therapy she could easily pay for a therapist’s kitchen remodel

Family shitshow but from MY side just to switch things up. Keep it fresh!

Background: my mom found out in her 40s that she was adopted at birth. She stumbled upon her adoption paperwork and was in shock. My grandpa was long gone and my grandma was dealing with dementia. Extended family didn’t offer much help and even my uncle said “They left the house on Christmas Eve to run an errand and came back with you. They said ‘this is your baby sister, NAME’ and we never talked about it again.” My uncle was 12.

My mom found her birth mother via a PI and it turns out she was the product of an extramarital affair. Her bio mom was married with three kids and when she told her husband she was pregnant by another man (obvious because he was stationed abroad) he told her to “deal with it” or he’d divorce her and take their children. Since it was 1955 the options were throw herself down some stairs or adoption, and she asked her MIL for help. The MIL got her in touch with my grandparents (she and my grandma were cousins) and they agreed to adopt the baby with a few stipulations: 1) closed adoption 2) my grandparents would pay all medical expenses 3) none of them would speak of this again. The birth mother agreed, and a few months later my grandparents picked her up from the hospital. A couple years later my grandparents moved to the mainland. The birth mother stayed with her husband until his death a few years ago and they went on to have one more child.

Mom has been in touch with her birth mother over the years, but it didn’t really pick up until her husband died. Apparently he was still salty about the affair 60 years later, but confessed on his deathbed that he made his wife give up a baby. Mom has met two of her half siblings and is touch with all of them. Three are still in Hawaii and one is just a little over an hour from my mom in CA. They have been enthusiastic about getting to know my mom and seem nice enough.

My mom wasn’t having much luck with finding her birth father; her bio mom’s husband was listed on the birth certificate and her bio mom couldn’t remember the guy’s last name (girl, I get it) giving my mom basically nothing to go on. 23andme gave her tons of matches on her bio mom’s side, but she recently got a hit on Ancestry. Her bio dad died last year. Through some FB sleuthing she found some siblings and reached out. She’s been talking to a half brother for a few days now. No one had any idea about her existence and she seems almost...offended? When I asked her what the hell she expected the man to say she admitted she didn’t know. “I had an affair with a married woman and she gave up our baby for adoption. No idea if it was a boy or a girl or where they live. Have fun!” Like, come on, Mom. 

We’ve been invited to the birth mother’s 90th birthday party this month and we’re going. My stepdad has finals and E opted to stay home and let us enjoy the mother-daughter trip (lol he just doesn’t want to deal with my mom and I totally respect that) so it’ll be the two of us. And yes, we both have mixed feelings about visiting Hawaii knowing the native population has been vocal about not bringing Covid to the islands but this woman is turning 90 and we’re not going to have a lot of chances. Plus as she said “Well, I’m inviting you and will give you a pass for being from the mainland.” Lol. 

Obviously some nerves are kicking in and we’ve been talking about the visit and my mom mentioned that she has an old photo of her birth dad from his obituary and is planning to show that to her birth mom and tell her the man is dead. I have no idea why - other than causing drama and hurting feelings in the name of “telling it like it is” - she is planning to do this. What does this serve? Who does this help? Can I not be there when this happens so none of these people think I condone this? 

It’s so on brand for my mom to be able to turn a trip to one of the most relaxing places on earth into something anxiety-inducing. I know she’s also relying on me to be her emotional support daughter and the fun, outgoing one as we meet 40+ relatives and if I don’t perform my duties to her liking it’ll be a whole thing. She did spring for first class tickets though so it won’t be all terrible!

[rosaliestark01]

I saw ur requests are open. Could you write a shy peter Parker x shy reader where they both one day decided to confess and it’s a lot of stuttering and blushing and rambling nonsense and Ned and mj get so fed up that they just push their heads together or something so they kiss and once they do it’s even more tomato blushing and rambling.

Thank youuu❤️❤️❤️

A Little Push

Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: All you and Peter need is a little push to get you on the right track.

Warnings: Maybe one baddish word?

A/N: for @thollandlover

"I'm going to try to ask him out today," you state. Peter Parker sat a few tables away with Ned and MJ. You couldn't help the rush of adoration you felt as he animatedly spoke to Ned about something. The two of you have talked countless times, but the way his face lights up with his hands flying everywhere never failed to put a smile on your face.

Your friends, Bailey and Daniel, absent-mindedly nod their heads as they pick at their lunches. The food wasn't that bad, but you had other things to worry about, like how you would build up the nerve to approach Peter.

"You said that yesterday," Cindy sighed as she pushed her lunch away. Gwen quickly nods in agreement.

"And last week."

"There was also that time you-" Harry begins, but you quickly interrupt him before he says anything you might regret.

"I know, but I'm really going to do it this time." Your friends look skeptical at you while you fold your hand in your lap at the realization that this may be your last chance before the summer break. Finals have already started, and the last day of school is on Friday. You sneak a glance at Peter, only to quickly turn away as you found that he was already staring in your direction.

"Do you think he saw that?" Your eyes widen as you look at your friends who are trying to cover up their amusement.

"Judging by the fact that he looks like a tomato, I'd say yes," Harry laughs. A slight blush creeps up your cheeks as you think of what to do about it.

"I think I should go talk to him," you finally tell them as you rub your hands on your thighs in an attempt to feel less nervous. You stand up, but Harry grabs your arm before you make it very far, prompting you to look at him.

"Remember, direct eye contact is a form of dominance," He states dramatically. "Show him you mean business."

"I'm trying to ask him out, not scare him away," you huff and Harry rolls his eyes at you.

"I'm just trying to give you some advice," he snarks before patting you on the head. "You do you."

"Okay. I'm going to go now," you state confidently, but you don't move an inch. "Can you come with me?"

"No." Harry sighed when he noticed your pout before saying, "Those people are selling popsicles, and I want one."

"Alright," you mumble. "I've got this."

You turn away from your friends and begin to walk towards Peter's table. Halfway through, you turn to look towards your friends, but they all pretended not to have noticed you.

"Hey, Y/N," MJ says. "We missed you on the trip."

One thing is for sure, and that is that you might never have developed feelings for Peter if it weren't for your friendship with MJ. Often, she'd invite you to hang out with her, Peter, and Ned, which led to you and Peter finding out that you had a few things in common. Then, somewhere along the line, you began to see Peter in a new light.

"My cousin was getting married, and, I guess it was kind of lucky, you know, with the whole Mysterio thing going on."

"Yeah," she sighed, obviously not wanting to talk about what when down during their trip.

"Peter-" You start, but Peter cuts you off.

"Y/N-" The two of you look at each other, and you try hard not to let that damn flush crept up your face again. Awkwardly, Peter continues, "I was wondering-I was wondering if maybe you- do you-Maybe you should go first."

You mentally curse yourself for thinking that this was a good idea. In all honesty, you never really thought you'd make it this far.

"Um... Peter, I wanted to ask if..." You pause, realizing you have no idea what you're saying. "The theater is showing Return of the Jedi on Friday."

"Yeah, I think they are," Peter states. You try to keep your face neutral as you realize that he misunderstood you. "If you're not sure, I can check their website if you want."

"What I mean is- Do you plan on going?" You ask, having a hard time keeping your voice level as well.

"Ned and I were going to see it, but you can come to if you want." Peter's whole face lit up, but you're sure that it had more to do with the fact that you were talking about Star Wars than the idea of you joining him... and Ned.

"Uh.. actually, my cousin is getting married on Friday, and I have to be there, you know," Ned blurted. For some reason, MJ looked amused while Peter furrowed his eyebrows.

"I thought your cousin was already-" It hit you that Ned probably knew why you were here.

"I don't want to intrude," You state, realizing that Peter might not want to be alone in a theater with you. If it was obvious to Ned that you like Peter, then it was obvious to Peter too.

"No, it's okay." Peter quickly insisted. "You could never intrude."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, unless you don't want to go."

"I do." 'It's just that..."

"For goodness sake!" MJ cried. She shoved your head toward Peter's while Ned did the same to Peter towards you. It took you a second to realize that your lips were literally touching Peter's, and you immediately pulled away.

"I'm so sorry!" Your eyes had widened in horror. What would he think of you now?!

"I didn't mean to do that." Peter stammered, "Ned- He pushed my head, and- I mean, It-It wasn't that bad. Right?"

"Peter-" Did he just say it wasn't that bad?

"Oh, god. You thought it was bad, didn't you?" Peter jumped to his feet and began pacing with his head in his hands. "That's not how it was supposed to happen."

"Peter, I thought-" You began, but he cut you off again.

"I had a plan, and now I ruined everything-"

You bit your lip nervously as you realize what you're about to do, but it's the only way you could think of to get his attention. You rise to your feet and pull Peter's lips back to yours. This kiss was better than the last, and it was nice that Peter seemed to melt into it. After a second, you pulled away to look at Peter.

"I thought it was nice," you murmured. Peter's eyes were wide, but he seemed to nod in agreement.

"You- You did?" He stuttered.

"Yeah. I came over here to ask if you wanted to see Star Wars with me." As you explain, a look of realization seemed to wash over him. "You know, on- on a date."

"A date? With me? You and me?"

"Yes?" You ask, suddenly becoming unsure.

"I'd love to go on a date with you," Peter beams, and you couldn't help but smile too.

"Not bad, Y/N. Not bad at all," Harry Osborn clapped from the other side of the cafeteria. You and Peter seemed to both realize everyone was watching you. "I told you the eye contact thing works."

[tomtenadia]

A Little Braver - 20

Even if I had a crazy day at work I did manage to do my Monday post as promise... but if you notice typos...I am sorry. I read it and edited but my brain  left with the boat tonight (I work for a ferry company, hence the joke)

This is the first of a few chapters where our bird boy is away and Hamel is causing problems to our gang.

Also, Aelin tries to cook... well... you can imagine how did that go.

--------------------

After the trip to the base Aelin had taken home a very sad Elide and then got back to her own place and cried herself to sleep while hugging Rowan’s pillow. It was very late in the afternoon and it was her day off and she had no intention of leaving her bed.

Her head was buried under the pillow when she heard her phone buzz so she scrambled to get it and her heart raced when she saw it was Rowan.

“Hi,” she said with a croaked vice.

“Are you okay?” Rowan was already in fussing mode.

“Yes I just woke up.” She heard a lot of background noise “where are you?”

“Vulture’s row.” He activated his camera and showed Aelin the view of a fully functional flight deck. “Uh, wait.” He pointed the camera stern of the ship and showed Aelin a jet landing.

“That was so cool.” He turned the camera to him and she saw him with his sunglasses and his hair messed up by the wind. Then he switched off the camera and they went back to normal.

“Are you there yet?”

“We are skirting around. We still have a few hours before we are fully in enemy territory.”

Then Aelin heard a siren of some sort and Rowan swore “I’ll call you as soon as I can again. I need to scramble. Love you.”

“Be safe.” She managed to add before he closed the phone call.

She collapsed again in bed then decided to call Lysandra and Elide and organise a day out the three of them shopping. Elide needed cheering up as well.

The next day Aelin, Elide and Lysandra had decided to have a girls’ afternoon to cheer up the two ladies who had their boys away. They met at the entrance of the shopping centre and Aelin went to hug Elide first of all “how are you doing?”

“Lorcan gave me a brief call yesterday telling me they were on the ship and on their way, then he had to go.”

Aelin sighed “today we don’t think about our far away boys.”

“And maybe you can buy some very sexy lingerie as a present for when Lorcan comes back.” Commented Lysandra and Elide blushed.

“What’s the point?” Asked Elide “you are taking it off anyway.”

Aelin laughed and took Elide’s hand “remember the dress I had at the navy party?”

Elide nodded “it was stunning.”

“I was not wearing anything underneath. It drove Rowan crazy.”

“I have done it a few times with Aedion and I agree with Aelin. The sex afterward has been amazing.”

“How do I learn all these things?”

“Stick with us and we will teach you.”

“Let’s go for some food,” said Aelin, “I haven’t eaten yet.”

“How will you survive now without your sexy chef in the house?” Asked Lysandra.

“Oh, I’ll just go back to my usual order in and ready meals.” Shrugged Aelin who had no intention of even trying to cook anything.

Lysandra took Aelin’s hand and walked toward a restaurant “come on Elide, let’s get this girl properly fed.”

The three women got into the restaurant and sat down and Aelin started perusing the menu eager for some decent food and not long after they placed their order. Lys was right, without Rowan she would be lost when it came to food. Rowan had properly spoiled her.

“How are the wedding preparations going?” Asked Aelin.

Lysandra and Aedion’s wedding was not far away and she was excited to see her best friend finally having her happy ending.

“We are getting there.”

“Do you have a dress yet?” Asked Elide all excited.

Lysandra took out her phone and showed them her dress.

“That is gorgeous. Aedion will not be able to keep his eyes off you during the ceremony.”

“That is the plan.” Lysandra smiled wickedly “but the biggest question is who is going to be next?”

“My money is on Aelin,” chimed Elide “Lor is not emotionally ready for such a step. You and the captain on the other hand…” her eyebrows flicked in amusement.

“She is right, and the two of you basically live together.”

“Yes and no.”

“What do you mean?” Lysandra was confused by the admission.

“We haven’t covered the subject yet. He still has his flat and some of his stuff there. Even after I recovered he never left and I never pushed because I like having him around.”

“Will you ask him to move in officially?”

Aelin sighed “maybe. When he comes back. I don’t know. Things are going well and I don’t want to mess it up.”

“Do you think he’ll say no?” Asked Lysandra. Brainstorming with her friend was always helpful and recently she hadn’t done it enough.

“I don’t think so. But living together is as far as we can go just now. For many, many reasons.”

“Is it because of Sam?”

“Only partially.” She was not going to tell her friends Rowan’s story. She had no right. So she remained vague hoping the two friends would get the hint and not ask anymore questions.

“Still, my money is on you two.” Added Lys “Elide is right, Lorcan does not seem to have yet the emotional ability to commit.”

“Hey, he kissed her in public. And yesterday at the base he seemed quite nice to her.”

“Quite?”

“I don’t know, I was concentrating on Rowan I just cast a brief glance at them.” Replied Aelin.

“He was super kind.” Added Elide taking biting on a breadstick.

Their food finally arrived and Aelin was the first to tuck in.

“Does the captain know about your crazy eating habits?” Asked Lysandra amused.

“Yes,” replied Aelin, enjoying her food “he calls me his bottomless pit. When we had our first date he joked that he might need a mortgage just to feed me.”

Elide laughed “Sam used to joke and say that he needed a second job just for feeding you.”

“I move a lot,” replied Aelin with a grin “I have a big appetite.”

“I think it must be a firefighter thing. Aedion is the same.” Lysandra grinned “and we burn a lot of calories.”

“Eeewwww, I did not need to know that. He is my cousin.”

“Oh come one, as if you and hot captain do not engage in illicit activities. The whole squad guessed that the other night you two had sex in the shower after the call at the club.”

“I was just giving him a special goodbye.” Her hand gently brushed the spot where she could feel his tags. She did a bit of research and she was happy she had a copy. Having the real one meant he was gone and she could not think about that.

“Are you okay?” Asked Lysandra worried at her sudden change of expression.

“Yeah.” She added flatly, then gave them a big smile. It was their day off she should not spoil it.

“So, are we taking Elide lingerie shopping?” Aelin teased trying to raise the spirits of her friend.

“Yes, it’s going to be fun.” Added Lysandra all excited.

“Girls… there is really no need. What I have is okay. Lorcan is not fussed.”

Aelin took a bite of her food “oh but we will make sure he is fussed and also that he knows how sexy you are so he does not decide to…. wander.”

“How do I keep him? I am nowhere near as interesting as the two of you. He might get bored of me very soon.”

Aelin stared at her friend and it broke her heart that her horrible past left her with no confidence at all. Elide was brilliant at her job and she was an intelligent woman and she was positive she would make quite a few heads turn.

“Don’t you say something like that ever again.” Lysandra preceded her. She was even more protective of Elide than her “I work with you everyday and I know how awesome you are and I am positive that if we go to a club you’d have your share of men looking at you.”

Aelin nodded.

They finished their meal and went back wandering around the shopping centre and visited a few shops. In one of them Aelin wandered in the male department and spotted a couple of lovely jumpers. One of them was a deep green and looked very cozy and she realised she had no idea of when it was Rowan’s birthday.

Silly question, you never told me your birthday. She sent the text and knew a reply might take a long time to come. She grabbed the jumper and tried to decide whether it was the right size for him.

“That is a lovely jumper.” Said Lysandra joining her at her side “already thinking about useful presents? You are like an old married couple.”

Aelin laughed.

“But I think this one is really nice and the man seems to look amazing in green.”

“I am just wondering about the size.”

Lysandra grabbed the tag “this one will fit Aedion so you should be fine.”

A moment later Elide rejoined them, her face beetroot red “I feel so silly.” And showed the girls her bag with her lingerie purchase.

“Hey, Ace and I are joking. You didn’t have to buy it if it makes uncomfortable.” But Elide surprised them “I will buy just one pair for now and I’ll see how it goes.”

Lysandra laughed “Aelin is already buying presents married couple style and you are still in the sexy lingerie stage. My girls have grow up so much.”

“And what stage are you and Aedion?” Asked Aelin with a grin.

“The one where I go to the grocery store and I phone him to ask him if he wants beef or chicken for dinner.”

The rest of the afternoon went swimmingly and she loved spending the day with Lys and Elide. They didn’t do that nearly enough.

Now she was back home and in the kitchen trying to accomplish her new mission. She had bought a cooking book for beginners and she had decided she was going to try and cook dinner. Lysandra had told her to start with something as simple as a stir fry. So she had bought a few more kitchen supplies and a pan Lys had told her was called a wok. She had mused why she could not use the pot she already had and Lys had rolled her eyes. Aelin had also bought the ingredients and now they were all lined up in front of her, the book open and a fire blanket and a small fire extinguisher on the counter just to be safe it was her cooking after all. She took a photo and sent it to Rowan then started working. When it got to cut the onions she cursed herself for deciding to cook.

Her phone rang and put it on speaker “hey,” her voice sounded strained and Rowan went in full fussing mode “are you okay?”

“Yeah, cutting those blasted onions.” She sniffled.

Over the line she heard Rowan roar with laughter “what are you making?” He asked as soon as he stopped laughing.

“A chicken stir fry. Lys said it’s easy to do.”

“Why are you putting onions in it?”

“Because I like them, mr I know how to cook.”

“I even bought a wok. Apparently I cannot use my pot.” She added as while throwing the ingredients in the pan.

“Seriously, when I get back we are going to have a massive overhaul of your kitchen.”

And Aelin’s heart raced in joy. It sounded like he had no intention of going back permanently to his flat. Maybe when he got back she should ask him the question after all.

“Aelin, it’s a miracle you have cutlery and two plates.” She could hear the humour in his voice.

“How are things going?”

“I just came off patrol. I am on my way to my quarters to get changed. I don’t have the most appealing scent just now.”

“Shower without me, so what? Two minutes max?”

“That’s about it. The water supply is not endless.”

He finally got to his quarters and collapsed on his bed after removing his boots then lay down and activated the camera.

“Hi sexy,” she did the same and placed the phone against the wall in front of her so he could see her as well.

“I don’t see any smoke. That’s a good start, considering it’s you.”

Aelin gave him the middle finger and then showed him her small fire extinguisher “I am prepared.” She took a bit of her food “for now it tastes edible, but not as good as yours.”

She saw him give her a smug smile and her instinct was to wipe it off his face with a kiss.

“The answer is July 16th, by the way.”

Aelin looked at him not understanding his statement.

“My birthday? You asked me earlier on.”

That she did “That’s two months away.”

“And when it’s yours?”

“May 3rd.”

“Aelin, that’s in two days.” He added sadly “and it sucks I can’t be there.”

“Lys has planned to drag me out with the girls of the firehouse. It’s also her bachelorette party. I have to go.”

“I almost forgot they were getting married. That came around quickly.”

Aelin laughed “not when you have been around them for years.” Aelin placed her food in a plate and moved to the sofa, taking her phone with her.

“When is the wedding?”

“This weekend. The weather is meant to be gorgeous which is a good thing since they are getting married outdoors.”

She heard him sigh “I really, really wish I could be there with you.”

She did not add that she had been thinking the same. So she just took a bite of her food.

“Edible?”

“Fuck no,”Aelin spit the morsel back in the plate “I must have done something wrong with the spices. It tastes horrible.” She grabbed her house phone.

“What are you doing?”

“Clearly ordering in. I am not eating this.”

Rowan rolled his eyes “you should practice more.”

“Why bother? I am clearly not cut for cooking. I am hopeless.”

“Do I need to tell you the amount of times my food sucked when I was still learning to cook decently? I got better with trial and error.”

Aelin huffed “fine I’ll try again on my next day off.” Then she put her house phone down after placing the order “I thought you were going for a shower?”

“Eager to get rid of me?”

“No, I just was hoping to have a peek at that nice arse of yours.”

Rowan laughed “If you behave.”

“Do you have the quarters all for yourself?”

Rowan nodded in the screen “the perks of rank. Gav is sharing with Vaughan. The twins are on their own.”

“Is that wise?”

“This carrier has a nice number of female officers. No one wants to go anywhere near that room.”

“Remember I am jealous, Whitethorn.”

“Some of them are middies on their snot cruise, so very young. The others… still not interested.”

“Who is a middie?”

“It’s short for midshipman or woman. They are the lowest ranking officers in the navy, just above the cadets. And a snot cruise is their first time out at sea on a proper mission.”

“Are your students middies as well?” She loved asking all those questions that might have sounded silly to him, but he never made her feel stupid for asking. He was always happy to answer.

“No, my students are called pilot officers. Then they become Flying officers, then flight lieutenants which is what the twins are, then Vaughan is our squadron leader, Gav is the Wing commander and then you have me.”

“Sounds so complicated.” She definitely needed to do more research to understand his job a bit better.

“It’s like you guys. Aedion looks after one rig as a lieutenant, you are the captain and are in charge of the operations of both at the same time and Dorian will be in charge of all the engines in case multiples houses are involved. Am I correct?”

Aelin nodded impressed.

“Same for us. Vaughan looks after our small squadron, Gav two or three squadrons, which is called a wing. I look after a unit composed of different wings and then Lorcan plays god in the CIC.”

“Now it makes more sense. So I could be your wing commander.”

“Having you fly with us would be insane. We would not concentrate on the enemy.”

Aelin laughed, then the buzzer of the door went off “just a sec, buzzard, food is here.” She went to get her food and plopped back on the sofa resuming her call with Rowan.

“Is your ship nice?”

“I served on her before. Not as swanky as the new one, but she is decent enough.” Rowan sat back up “hey, I really need to take that shower and then it’s chow time. If I miss it I don’t eat until tomorrow morning.”

“Go. Sorry for keeping you.”

“You did not such things. I have been looking forward to call you.”

“I love you.” She told him, sending back the tears that had started forming.

“I love you too, Fireheart.”

Aelin waved him goodbye and went back eating while tears had begun flowing down her cheeks. It had only been two days and she hoped it would get easier being so far apart.

***

The next morning she arrived at the station bright and early, got changed and went straight to Aedion “Are you ready?”

The man nodded “Peter is covering you until we get back from the police and I got Manon in charge of the second rig.”

“Good. Let’s go.”

They arrived at the police headquarters not long after and Chaol met them at the reception area “Hi guys,”

“Here’s my favourite cop.” Aelin went to hug Chaol.

“Just because I keep reporters away from you.”

She gave him a huge smile back.

“Come, detective Ytger is waiting for you.” They followed behind him in silence and stopped in front of a door and knocked.

A female voice told them to go in and once in the office Aelin recognised the same woman at one of the arson cases a few months back.

“Captain, Lieutenant, we meet again.” The three shook hands and the detective sat back down and invited both cousins to do the same.

The detective threw a thick file on the desk “you two have just made a very powerful enemy.”

“The man is a bastard.”

“Believe me, captain, when I tell you that Hamel has been a thorn in my side for a very long time.”

“And why is he still at large? Two people died and the man did not care.”

The woman pinched the bridge of her nose “he has very powerful lawyers and always gets away with murder. We have been working on him for a long time but whatever piece of proof we bring in is never enough to get him behind bars for good.” Aelin could sense the tiredness in her voice.

“Did you close his club as I asked?”

“We did, but he owns almost all the ones in Orynth. And so much more.”

“Can’t you arrest him for murder?” voiced Aedion.

“No, his lawyers showed us the papers of the latest inspections and the place was deemed to code. He blamed the company that did the inspections for lying to him.”

“Detective, I hope you are aware that is a bullshit.” Said Aedion, fury burning under his surface.

“I am well aware.” The woman added almost apologetically “the closure is temporary. It will not stick too long.”

Aelin almost swore “Have the other clubs been checked?”

“We did some undercover recon but we don’t have the full skillset to know what’s up to code.”

Aelin smiled wickedly “well, it’s a good thing that you have a firefighter whose birthday is very soon and was planning to go to a club.”

“You are not dragging Lys and the others in this.”

“Calm down. Hamel does not know them, they are safe. I will wear a disguise.”

“I don’t like the sound of this.” He protested again but he knew Aelin could be stubborn.

“I am coming too.”

“No,” said Aelin “One: Hamel remembers how you lifted him up and he will not forget such act. Two: it’s Lys bachelorette party as well. So, no.” she paused “you can take the guys to another one.”

“What happens if we find both clubs not up to specs?” Asked Aelin worried that it was going to be a lost cause.

“We can start by closing them and gather a bit more time to have more material against him. We have other leads. We just need something significant.”

They discussed with the detective which clubs to hit and they left.

Once in the car Aedion made his displeasure quite clear “I do not like this.”

“Neither do I, but the police has no idea what to look for.” Replied Aelin.

“We are not cops.”

“And they are not firefighters.”

After that they drove in silence all the way back to the station.

***

Two days had passed and Aelin’s birthday had arrived. She arrived at the station and laughed at the scene. One of the rigs was covered in balloons and a sign saying happy birthday, cap and the second rig was for Aedion and Lysandra and the front of the truck had a long white sheet over it that looked like a bridal veil and two massive papier mache rings attached to the front.

She laughed and joined Ansel and Manon who were doing some checks “did everyone see this?” She pointed at the engine and truck. The two women nodded.

“Then let’s clear it. I do not want to go on a call in that state.”

“Yes, captain.” Said the two women in unison. 

The locker room was empty and she sat down on the bench and looked at her phone again. She was hoping for a text from Rowan or a call but nothing yet. She kept telling herself that he was busy and probably out flying. She removed his dog tags and hung them in the locker and stood and stared at the pictures she had hung up. It was some of the photos they had taken in Doranelle. With her finger she brushed a photo of him. He was standing and looking up to the sky. His eyes closed and a small smile painted on his face and his hair all tousled after she had messed it up. It was one of her favourite photos of him. “Be safe, please.” And she blew him a kiss.

Aelin got dressed and then reached the team who was having breakfast in the communal room.

“She is here.” Shouted Nox happily.

Luca grabbed her arm and pulled to the table where a cake was waiting for her.

“Chocolate hazelnut cake. Your favourite.” He cut a slice and offered it to her.

Aelin grabbed it eagerly “mmmmm”

“Get a room you two,” shouted Ress.

A moment later Manon came through with a man carrying a large box “he says this is for you, captain.”

“Thanks, Manon.”

Aelin grabbed the box from the courier and sat down on the sofa. It came from a shop in Orynth. Strange. She opened the box and when she peeked inside she saw a massive stuffed toy. Once she lifted it she realised it was a bird and she had a feeling she knew who it was from.

“A bird? Why a bird?” Asked Lysandra.

Aelin smiled, grabbed the stuffed toy and walked to her bunk to be alone when she noticed the letter inside.

Once alone she sat down on her bed and placed the bird at her side and read the letter

Happy birthday, fireheart.

I wish I could be there for you but I can’t and it hurts more than I thought possible.

If you are reading this, you have met your new friend. I could not find a buzzard but a toy shop in Orynth had a white-tailed hawk and since I have silver hair I thought it was the closest option. Do we look similar? He will keep you company while I can’t be there with you.

I will try and call you tomorrow if I get a free moment, but the guys and I have pulled alert crew duty for the day so no phone for me.

Have fun with the girls and leave the other guys alone especially if they are navy and army.  Aelin chuckled at the joke

I miss you already.

I love you. Madly. 

To whatever end.

Yours, 

Buzzard.

By the time she had finished reading the letter she was in tears. She hugged the soft toy and for a moment she hoped to smell his scent of pine and snow. She went to her locker, grabbed the dog tags and put them around the bird’s neck “you look after them while I am on shift, but then I take them back.” After that she took a photo and sent it to Rowan “I think I will call him Rowan.”

**

It was later that night and Lysandra and Elide were at Aelin’s place to get ready for their fun night. Aelin though, was not in the mood. Rowan had eventually called her but the phone call was cut short when he had go and scramble. Soft toy Rowan was on her bed, his dog tags back on since she would not be wearing them with her dress.

Lysandra was going through her wardrobe looking for a dress for the night.

“So, the captain does have clothes that are not uniform,” said the woman going through his clothes but Aelin glared at her and Lys went back to Aelin’s side of the dresser.

“Did he phone you?”

“Yeah.” Said Aelin flatly while wearing her dress.

“Lorcan said they were having a couple of shitty days.”

Aelin ignored her friend or she would end up in tears and ruin her make up.

“Did he give you his dog tags?” Asked Lys noting them pending from the bird’s neck.

“No, he can’t. He made a copy. And I don’t want the original ones until he retires.”

“Why?” Asked Elide while she was busy fixing her hair.

“Because it means he is dead. They are used for identification.” Replied Lysandra flatly. She had learned that from Aedion.

“Can we please change subject?” Snapped Aelin.

Lysandra grabbed a green dress “what do you think?”

“It will go perfectly with your eyes.” Said Aelin wearing her blue dress.

“I thought you loved the captain.” Said Elide.

“Uh?”

“That dress?” Added Lys pointing at her attire “it makes you look as if you are open to being chased.”

“Too slutty?”

“Ansel will be proud of you.”

Aelin smiled “I do love the captain and I have no plans on taking anyone home. My only companion in bed tonight will be bird Rowan.” Then she wore a wig of red hair.

“Why the wig?”

Aelin and Aedion had decided not to tell anyone about their plan for the night, so she had to lie although it hurt lying to Lysandra “just for some fun.”

They arrived at the club half an hour later and Manon, Asterin and Ansel were already there and apparently already having fun.

“You made it” shouted the red-haired woman. “And who is the hot red-haired friend?”

“It’s me, Ansel.”

“Captain, you look hot.”

Aelin laughed “thank you.”

“We got some drinks already,” said Manon.

“Happy birthday, captain,” said Asterin raising her glass “and congratulation to Lys for bagging the meanest lieutenant in the TFD.”

Their glasses clinked and then Aelin spotted Chaol in the distance. What the heck was he doing at the club? She nodded at him and he gave her a small nod back. Everyone knew Chaol and if the girls spotted him it could raise some questions so she texted him with the pretence of being the overbearing girlfriend checking on her man.

The girls went out dancing and she stood behind saying she was not in the mood when she was actually trying to check out the place. She was about to join Chaol in his hideout when a guy stopped at her side and blocked her way “aren’t you a stunning creature?” He said and Aelin cringed. She really hated clubs and the pigs that came with them.

“Of course I am.”

She felt his arm sneak around her waist and his body move closer to hers and she closed her eyes at the fact that those arms were not Rowan’s.

“What if I buy you a few drink and have some fun you and I?”

“You couldn’t handle me.” She said to him in a whisper.

“I love a good challenge. My flat is not far from here.” And his hand slithered up on her back.

Aelin scoffed “I’d never have sex with you even if we were the last two humans left in the world.”

She made to walk away but he grabbed her arm. She almost punched him but in that instant she felt someone hugging her from behind “it’s me, follow my lead.” He whispered in her ear and she noticed it was Chaol.

“Thank you for finding my girlfriend. I went to the gents and I lost her.”

“Sorry darling,” said Aelin caressing Chaol’s face.

The stranger walked away annoyed.

“Thank you.”

“You were holding your own anyway.” He commented.

“I was about to punch him and cause a scene and mess up the mission.” She whispered then grabbed his hand and pulled him to a quiet booth at the back of the club

“What are you doing here?”

“Detective Ytger sent me here as back up. Hamel’s minions know all of the detectives but not us beat cops.”

“How do you want to proceed?” She asked him.

“You are the firefighter, I am just here to make sure you get out okay.”

“Ok, I need to walk around. Just keep an eye on me.” Chaol nodded and Aelin walked away.

She went back to the bar area and smiled when Elide walked toward her “Ace!! Come on it’s your birthday, you need to come and have fun.” She also had a job to do but felt bad at abandoning her friends. So she joined them again and Lys grabbed her for some dancing.

“How how many hearts did you break?”

“Just the one but he was a pig.”

“Did you tell him you have a super hot captain waiting for you?” 

Aelin shrugged and turned to Elide.

“How many drinks did Ansel give you?”

Elide lifted three fingers in front of her face “two.”

Aelin laughed “no more alcohol for you.”

“Buuut I am sad and I miss Lorcan.” Aelin hugged her friend knowing full well how she felt.

“Still, no more alcohol, you just can’t hold it.”

She walked Elide to Manon “can you keep an eye on her please? And just water please. Elide has reached her alcohol quota for the evening.”

“Of course.”

Aelin smiled at the white-haired woman. She was very introverted and of a very few words but she did not care about that since she was good at her job. She was the complete opposite of Ansel.

Speaking of the woman…”where did Ansel go?”

“Last time I have seen her she was dancing with a brunette.” Aelin dragged a hand on her face “I am going to the ladies. Just behave, okay?”

She used the excuse to slip away and walk around as she was supposed to do. She wanted to try and take some photo as proof but covert operations were not her forte.

“You are back,” whispered Chaol at her back.

“I’ll pretend to be drunk and lost.”

“Be careful, this is making me nervous.”

She nodded and walked away from him. Part of her was glad she had not mentioned this to Rowan, he would have gone in full protective mode.

She kept pretending she was drunk and dumb and ended up in the kitchen “sorry,” she slurred, leaning against the doorframe “are these the loos?”

“No miss,” said one of the staff “they are down there and on your right.” She gave the man a goofy smile and a wet kiss on the cheek “thank you, sweet man.” The hug had given her the time to have a very quick look in the kitchen and note there was no safety equipment. That was enough for her to shut down that club as well. How could they run a kitchen that way? She really had to take down the bastard. She hid in the shadows of the club and and checked the fire doors without activating them and found them of shoddy quality. She was fuming. She had a good look at the club and realised even the numbers of people allowed in was probably over the limit. Those doors were for 60 people, she could only see three on ground level, which meant a limit of 180 people. There were probably over three hundred, all crammed and spread on two levels. It was a firefighter nightmare. She ran back to Chaol “go home. I have seen enough. Tell the detective this place needs to be shut down as well.”

“I’ll phone her as soon as I am out. She was waiting for news anyway.”

“Go, and say hi to Yrene.”

Chaol left and she ran back to her friends nervous that she was placing them in danger. She wanted to go but the idea of leaving all those people behind made her nervous. She texted Aedion and rage surged back when he told her that their club was the same.

The girls took her dancing in the middle of the dance floor and danced away ignoring a couple of guys basically dancing on her. She hated clubs so much and the music was horrible. She bit down her annoyance and went to hug Lysandra “how does it feel to be almost married?”

“Weird.” She looked at Aelin “are you having fun?”

“You know I don’t like clubs but I came for you, it’s your night after all.”

“It’s your birthday too.”

Aelin shook her head “I get one every year, you better marry my cousin and stick to him.”

“And you stick to the captain. I want to come to your wedding.”

Aelin laughed “we’ll see…” then she turned and saw Elide leaning against the counter half asleep “what if we take the party to my place? I am sick of this place.”

“Please,” said Manon in a hopeful tone. She hated clubs as well “we can get alcohol on the way home. If I hear another man asking me why my hair is white I am going to start snapping necks.”

“Hey Manon, no need to snap necks,” then Aelin looked around for Ansel.

“I’ll get her,”said Asterin when she noticed the woman in the distance.

The woman came back with Ansel in tow and moved closer to Aelin “the fire exits are not enough and one is blocked.” She whispered.

“I know, I am going to call Peter and explain the situation to him.” She took her phone out “take the others to the cars. I’ll be there in a moment.”

Aelin watched Asterin walking the group to safety then hid in dark a corner and phoned Peter explaining that they had to pretend they had an anonymous call and come and pay a visit to the place and shut it down. The man agreed after she explained him the situation in terms of safety. She was playing dirty but could not care less. People’s lives were at stake. Hamel could just go and impale himself for all she cared.

Quickly she left the building and she went to her car joining Lys and Elide. The remaining women were in Manon’s car.

They stopped for booze on the way and finally got back home. Aelin took Elide piggyback style as the woman had fallen asleep. Once in the flat she placed Elide in the spare bedroom and covered her with a blanket then went back to the rest of the group camped in her living room. A text from Peter told her that the club had been safely evacuated and closed. Apparently he had found even more infractions that she had not the time to spot. 

“Ok, ladies back to the party.” Aelin grabbed a mixed selection of glasses and mugs for the beer.

Ansel stood and went to use the bathroom and came back a few minutes later “why do you have guy’s stuff on the bathroom shelf? Do you live with the silver fox?”

Aelin sighed “Rowan has been living here since I was discharged from the hospital.”

“That was a while ago.”

“I know.” Aelin sighed.

“Yes!” Shouted Ansel pulling Aelin toward her “our captain is shacking up. I am so proud of you.”

After a few drinks, Ansel would become very friendly with anyone. It was a good thing they had left the club.

In that instant she got a text from Aedion saying that he had activated the fire alarm in their club and evacuated the whole place after he had spotted a shit ton of infractions. Well, that was probably another club down. Definitely not what they had agreed with the detective but they had to do something.

“Ok, since this is a bachelorette party as well, we can have a bit of spiciness.” Said Asterin while drinking her beer “unusual place where you had sex. We need to give Lys some ideas.”

“Do we?” Joked Aelin “Lys would definitely teach us something.” Then everyone looked at Ansel “after her of course.”

“I once hooked up with civilian pilot and we did it in his cockpit before he got to fly the plane”

“Where you flying as well?” Asked Lysandra curious.

Ansel nodded “it’s a long story.”

“Aelin, you are up. I bet the captain is wild.” Lysandra’s eyebrows lifted suggestively.

“He is pretty amazing but the strangest places have been a beach, the sea, behind a waterfall, a pool at the foot of two different waterfalls and almost on a military ship.”

“Almost?” Asked Manon curious.

“I’ll show you the dress.”

Aelin went to get her black dress and got back a moment later “and he knew I had nothing underneath.”

The group of women cheered loudly “that must have driven him insane.” Joked Asterin.

“That’s why the almost. We would have been in a lot of trouble if we got caught.”

“I have nothing left to teach you.”Ansel was sprawled on a chair and lifted her beer in acknowledgment.

“Lys?”

The woman blushed savagely “in a car wash. Aedion and I stayed in the car while it was getting washed and… well.. it was quick but fun.”

“Definitely nothing to teach you,” Aelin clinked her bottle with her friend.

“Asterin?”

“My previous firehouse, with one of my colleagues on top of a rig on a night shift.”

Manon gave a light chuckle “was it when you were at the Regional 2?”

Asterin nodded “he was some hot firefighter. We are still friends. We did it once and then it felt so weird and never happened again.” She explained.

Aelin sighed “The night of the mayor’s party, Thomas and I hooked up. We ended up at my place. We did it, realised it was rebound sex and finished the night with tv and junk food.” Thinking about him still pained her.

“No friggin way. More than the kiss?” Asked Lysandra shocked.

Aelin nodded “after you saw us kissing I left, he found me, we went back to my place.”

Aelin looked around and noticed that no one wanted to make too many comments, his death was still too fresh for everyone and he had been Manon’s and Asterin’s captain.

“Does Rowan know?”

“I told him and he is fine. We were nothing at the time and I was mad at him.”

In that instant Elide joined the group and Aelin stood and went to her “hey, how are you feeling?”

“My head hurts.” Replied the woman leaning against Aelin.

“I should take her home. We are working tomorrow we should all go home.”

“Lys is right,” added Asterin “another 24hrs shift ahead, we need some sleep.”

Manon and Asterin offered to take Ansel home and Aelin remained with Lys and a sleepy Elide.

“I am sorry the evening sucked.”

“Hey,” Lysandra placed her hands on Aelin’s shoulders “it didn’t, and to be honest we were all quite tired. All it matters is to marry that annoying cousin of yours.”

“Take Elide home, she is about to go to sleep again.”

Once Aelin was alone she finally shed the dress and opened one of Rowan’s drawers and grabbed a t-shirt. They were usually far too big for her but she loved them as pyjama. She went to the bathroom, got ready and then finally got in bed with bird Rowan and squeezed close to his pillow to inhale his scent.

She grabbed her phone and found a text from Rowan

I hope you had a nice evening. I wish I had been there with you because it’s bad out here. I hope bird me is keeping you company. Have a nice night, Fireheart. Love you.

Aelin’s heart sank at the anguish in his voice. She tried to call him but had no answer.

I love you, come back to me, was all she managed.

She squeezed bird Rowan and tried very hard to fall asleep.

TAGS:

@rowaelinismyotp​

@jlinez​

@swankii-art-teacher​

@courtofjurdan​

@whimsicallyreading​

@tillyrubes10​

@surielandiareendgame​

@aelin-bitch-queen​

@bruiseonthefaceofhumanity 

[adorethedistance]

City Slicker, Cowboyfriend - Owen Joyner x Reader

JATP masterlist

Warnings: Swearing, nerves, mentions of covid.

Words: 2163

Summary: You’re starting to have doubts about moving all the way to Norman until a shopping trip to Ikea turns into the meet-cute you’ve been waiting for.

A/n: This isn’t a request or one of my Valentines day fics, this is just something that I have had stuck in my head ever since Owen posted this on IG and bc I’m facing total writers block with my other pieces I cranked this one out in a few hours to get the ball rolling again. Hopefully. Enjoy this totally unproofed, fluffy madness!! (Because who doesn’t need more Owen content in their life?)

There are perks to moving and one of them is undoubtedly: shopping. For furniture, home decor, kitchen utensils, whatever! Granted, shopping alone can be tedious and, for some, like pulling teeth, thus, I’ve enlisted the help of my best friends Leila and Chelsea. I didn’t even have to bribe them to come because everyone loves getting lost in Ikea. It’s one of the best things about the human experience.

“It’s been so long since I’ve been in an Ikea,” Leila says to no one in particular as we walk through the onslaught of staged bedrooms.

“What?! Are you telling me you don’t get meatballs and lawn chairs on a weekly basis?” My exaggeration makes Leila laugh as she steps into one of the display kitchens. Looking between me and Chelsea she asks,

“What would you do if I turned the handle then a jet of water sprayed out?”

“Die, I guess.”

The three of us continue through the faux house displays and past the mattresses despite Leila’s urge to jump on every single one. As we walk through the section of different lighting features, I sigh with a frown as I think about college. I changed my bachelor’s to an associate’s so I could graduate in two years. Chelsea’s parents moved out here at the end of our senior year in high school, and she moved with them to study in Norman. Leila in turn went to Arizona for an athletic physical therapy gig, leaving me to face college alone in L.A.. In the two years the three of us were apart, we missed each other more and more, and after determining which of the three states we lived in was cheapest, we packed up and headed East. Covid kind of delayed our plans. But after a few months, I picked Leila up from Arizona and together we chased open job opportunities into Norman, Oklahoma. The three of us found an apartment space to live in together and thus, we ended up in Ikea on this fine Sunday afternoon.

Snapping back into reality I see Leila standing directly under a light that’s hanging very low from the ceiling. Once standing directly underneath it, she pulls down her mask and opens her mouth, rising to her toes to eat the fixture.

“Leila, don’t you dare fellate that light bulb! You’re gonna get us kicked out.”

I swear I’m practically their mom when it comes to behaving in public. Figuring they can’t hurt themselves in the college dorm section, I lead them quickly through it and into the giant furniture warehouse section. On the far wall, I see a large poster of a couple smiling brightly behind Chelsea, but I don’t bother to read the text. Leila and I spot the poster at the same time, and the imagery jogs her memory.

“Chelsea, how’s Hunter? Haven’t heard from him slash about him in like a week,” she asks about Chelsea’s boyfriend of a year.

“Oh, yeah, he tore a ligament in his wrist.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, I guess he moved it wrong or something and put too much stress on the area that it just tore. He was moving hay bales into the horse stables.”

“As opposed to the chicken stables,” Leila judges under her breath, which makes me snicker as a result.

“I still can’t believe you’re dating a literal cowboy,” I interject, “Like, I know we’re in Oklahoma, and he’s from Tennessee, but we saw Texas on the way out here and that’s cowboy country. Norman seems more...” I trail off in search of delicate phrasing.

“Just barely marry your cousin territory, but still downing chewing tobacco whilst driving a lifted truck?” Leila hits the nail squarely on the head.

“Yeah, that sounds about right-” Before I can continue giving my thoughts on Norman, I cut myself off at the sound of laughter behind me.

“Sorry. We weren’t trying to eavesdrop, that was just really funny.” When I turn around, I see a guy roughly our age dressed in all black with bleach-blonde hair, speaking through light, broken laughter.

“No worries,” I dismiss the apology as we pass by one another, and out from the dressers section. The three of us continue into the different sections, and come to a stop once I see we’re exactly where we need to be: dining room shit!

“Cowboy boyfriends aside- oh my gosh: cowboy boyfriends. Cowboyfriends,” I say getting lost in my new terminology. Both of my friends share a mix of laughter and gasps and my ingeniousness. “Anyway. Cowboyfriends aside, how is Avery?” I ask Leila who begins blushing madly.

“She’s really good. We were just making plans for our three year anniversary, which reminds me to tell y’all I’m flying back to Phoenix to surprise her.”

“Awwww,” I nearly tear up and the sweet image of Leila and her girlfriend reuniting, “Y’all are so cute. Both of you and your partners. You know, being the only single friend in this group has made life suck a lot. Y’all are so happy and in love and not dead inside. Honestly? Get fucked both of you.” Despite my harsh words, the three of us break into a lighthearted conglomerate of laughter.

“We’ll find you someone… eventually.” Leila pretends she also can’t hear the last part of her sentence despite being the one saying it.

“I know, but I don’t think it’s in the cards for me to find love in Norman. I don’t need a cowboyfriend, and we’re not gonna find a true city slicker here either.”

When I finish my statement, I see our blonde friend seems to have followed us. I observe he comes to a stop in front of another guy in a flannel with a shopping cart. The way they jump into conversation with one another parallels the animated body language Leila, Chelsey, and I share. I continue to watch their exchange as Chelsea speaks up.

“Maybe you need someone right down the middle.”

“Yeah, like a guy who drives a truck but uses it to transport Ikea furniture instead of a whole ass tree that he’ll carve into a chair.” A small laugh escapes my lips, at both Leila’s statement, and the scene ahead of Blondie pretending to strangle his friend over something. I’m snapped out of my nosy yet endeared stare as a third guy appears. He’s a sandy blonde with billowing locks tucked under a trucker hat. And he came from behind me and my two friends to place something in their cart which keeps his back toward me. When he turns back around, my mind goes blank. Any thoughts of shopping for dining room chairs has left my mind. He is wearing a face mask, but he has such nice eyes that he could have a giraffe snout under the mask for all I care. I see him look up from the shelves, directly into my eyes. We stay locked for a moment before he breaks away and turns to his friends. I slowly turn to my friends too who are both giving me the exact same look of excitement and conspiracy.

“He’s really cute,” I sigh out with a laugh, swooning much louder than I’d have preferred.

“He has a face mask on,” Leila points out, her expression dropping from excited to cynical.

“Still! I can just tell.”

“Girl, what are you doing? Talk to him!” Chelsea whisper-shrieks.

“Shhh, I cannot take you anywhere!”

Glancing back at the handsome stranger, we connect eyes once more and I feel my face heat furiously as I realize he was already looking at me. I’m the first to break; I consult my friends for the best course of action and as I’m turned 180 to face them, Chelsea starts pretending to hyperventilate excitedly. Leila looks over my shoulder for me, discreetly surveying the other trio in the dining chairs aisle.

“Don’t look now, but he’s talking to his friends and looking between them and you.” I can hear in her voice she’s trying her best not to smile despite wearing a face mask.

“Should I give him my number?”

“Yes!”

“What are you waiting for?”

“I’m nervous! What if he’s gay?”

“Will you just get over there? I promise you a gay man would not be wearing what he’s wearing right now. Maybe a lesbian,” Leila adds for good measure.

“You guys are freaking me out, I need you to leave so I know you’re not judging my flirting.” I shoo my best friends out of the aisle as inconspicuous as possible. Kinda wish blondie would’ve done the same because when I turn back around, the other trio hasn’t moved and the only one looking at me is the one in all black. He quickly averts his eyes though and I take one last deep breath before walking over to the stranger. I tilt my chin up ever so slightly to fake a sense of confidence that I unmistakably don’t have right now.

“Hey.” Really, Y/n? Hey??

“Hey,” he greets back breathily. Why is he nervous? I’m the one who gets to be nervous! Man, he’s really cute. I can’t fuck this one up. I’m not doing so stellar right now. Perhaps you should say something else, dipshit?

“Uhm,” I should’ve scripted this. “I just wanted to say that-” You’ve got this. Don’t be a bummer. “I-uh, I think you’re really cute and I was wondering if I could give you my number?” My speech is slow, each word deliberate in spite of the fact that I feel like I’m having an out of body experience right now. I’m not the one in control of the words that are coming out of my mouth.

Upon realizing why I walked over, blondie’s friends take the question as a sign to leave and less than inconspicuously back away from the two of us. Trucker hat spares them one last glance over his left shoulder and judging by the look flannel gives him, they were definitely talking about me in their team huddle.

“Uh, yeah. I was gonna ask for your instagram- if you have one, that is.”

“I’m cool with both.” The two of us reach for our phones and unlock them with anxious hands. I move to hand him my phone with instagram open, and he trades me for his which has a new contact open. I type my name and put my favorite heart emoji next to it after triple checking the number is correct. Wow, you’re just so ballsy today, Y/n!!!!! I give him back the phone, scanning the instagram account he’s just opened and followed for me. I hear him exhale a little harder as a small laugh and can only imagine it’s from the stupid heart emoji.

“Owen,” I say in a hushed, endeared voice, fully not intending to say it out loud. “You have a million followers?! Oh, you’re an actor. OH… You’re an actor.” I really don’t need to be speaking my entire thought process right now in the middle of this Ikea. Exhaling a small laugh of my own, I see we already have a small bunch of mutuals, one of which is… Chelsea??? Looking up from my phone I turn around to see Chelsea and Leila watching the interaction from around the corner of one of the industrial shelves.

In the flurry of scattered likes, I see him find my account and follow me back. I accept the request, nervous of what he thinks of me without a face mask on. What do I think of him without a face mask on? Going back to his account, seeing his entire face is even better than just his eyes. I was right, Leila: he is cute.

“You’re really pretty,” I hear him almost sigh as he combs through the grid of my account. The comment makes my heart beat all the much faster and I finally look upward to get a glimpse of Owen in the flesh. Still as beautiful as the last time I checked!

Sparing a quick glance over my shoulder, he looks back down at me and laughs,

“I think your friends got tired of waiting.”

“I think yours did, too.” The other members of our trios come back into the aisle we had kicked them from more or less two minutes ago. We connect eyes once more and stare longingly, wordlessly at one another, so lost in each other’s beauty our friends have to break up the staring contest of infatuation.

“Y/n?” I hear Leila behind me.

“Uh, well, I have to get back to chair shopping, but- text me later?”

“For sure.”

“For sure,” I mimic his voice.

“Guess I’ll see you later. Y/n.”

“Yeah.” And with that, we’re pulled apart by our respective best friends, through the vast expanse of the Norman Ikea.

“What was that?” Chelsea asks, excitedly linking arms with me.

“I don’t know I- Wait, you have some explaining to do!”

*** 

Taglist: @caitsymichelle13 @kaitlyn2907 @itz-jas @crybabyddl @kcd15 @kinda-really-lost @calamitykaty @morganayennefertyrell @n0wornever @dream-a-little-bigger-x @mrstodorooki @vicesvsvirturesfanfic @curlybrownhairedboys @amazinggracy @kaitieskidmore1 @asdfghjkl-fanfics​ @ghostlygreenbean @juliefromaustralia @merceret​ @jemimah-b99 @ifilwtmfc @thesweetestsinner​ @imsydneywalker @lovesanimals @thebloodthirstyvampress @bumbleberry-pie @losers-club6 @tefilovesreading​ @dmcfarland1@joynerxmercer @kexrtiz @talk-on-the-street @phantompogues @konciousdreamer @sunsetcurvej @warmnesss0ul @lilyjoyner 

[cloveroctobers]

SHEA BUTTER BABY | S. James

Requested by: @theshyprincess “Can I get a spencer James getting married and smut biracial if I’m not bothering you I really like your writing”

A/N: decided to do this in hc form, hope that’s cool? And it’s been my thing lately anyways lol. Hope you like this one! I also hope I channeled Spencer well 🙃

WARNINGS: light smut + some curse words ofc!

We all know Spencer takes the world on his shoulders; when his finds you, you become his world

You meet freshman year in university, specifically on the football field and decided to invite him to a sorority party because what’s the best way to start off your freshman year? A little party never hurt nobody

Except it did, things got rowdy resulting with a huge ass knot on your forehead and losing consciousness for a few minutes

You expected Spencer to dip like any other asshole dude would have but you were shocked that he actually came to your aid and walked you back to your dorm even tho you had a “big ass egg” growing from your forehead

You could laugh about it a little then, but more so now

He actually asked for your number before you departed, even tho you thought you majorly screwed whatever this was up but he wanted to see you again and you were more than happy to oblige

It was instant friendship with a touch of flirtations but you knew that he recently got out of some heartbreak from his senior year of high school and you had no choice but to respect that he wasn’t looking for a relationship right now

Day by day you became the best of friends spending majority of your time together while also getting to know each other’s outside friends and family, you became each other’s family

It was end of sophomore year where Spencer decided he wanted to give it a go but it was your turn to be leery since you watched him go through some girls but he never flaunted that in front of you, yet you always knew

You didn’t want to be his last option

“You could never be that, y/n. You’re so much more than what you think I think of you.”

Words of affirmation is definitely Spencer’s love language and he had no problem saying how he felt about you

He openly admitted that he was confused at first, trying to fight with his inner self on taking your friendship into the love zone. He’s always gone the friendship route first before it turned into romance—well maybe not with Kia but his past two relationships he did

He was not only confused but nervous and you made him work a little bit to get a date from you but you didn’t hold out for too long since you felt Spencer was your person

You took things slow but you still felt like friends except now you held onto each other a little longer and touches seem to burn now but you liked it, really liked it

Senior year is when he proposes, he’s actually the second out of his group of friends back home to get engaged...JJ was the first and actually went through with the marriage after one drunken night in vegas with some girl who was studying physical therapy

Sure it’s only been two years but like your grandmother always says, “when you feel a pull in your heart whenever they’re not around, they’re the one baby.” And your grandparents got married only after knowing each other for four months. Every love is different

You were a sappy mess and Spencer found it humorous while slipping the ring on and embracing you, “we not doing that. Save it until the wedding, huh?”

And he gets a few nice whacks to the chest but he can take it ofc as he’s kissing you so gently

It’s a private moment and you wouldn’t have it any other way

A year and a few months after you graduate, Spencer gets drafted into the NFL and you’re still searching for a job you majored in

You’re both living apart with you going back to your hometown in Arizona and Spencer in Cali. Things aren’t easy but you’ve been planning your wedding and it feels like Spencer is just saying he’s okay with everything which is frustrating. You don’t want to do this alone and you need to find a place to live together, you didn’t want to live with Spencer’s mom and brother as much as you loved them. You were both adults and needed to take the wheel

Yet it always felt like Spencer was busy planning on putting further distance between you since he was secure in his career and you just felt stuck

That caused a riff between you two but Spencer didn’t like that silent treatment bs. You were gonna talk to him one way or another

Once you get through it, which you definitely do!! it’s pure heaven and you couldn’t be happier

You get married at a banquet hall

You both have a lot friends and family that’ve invited

Your best friends + sibs are your best men, bridesmaids, maid of honor

Spencer leaves a chair open for his dad up front with his mom and brother 🥲

Initially you were going to have your guests pick whatever seat they wanted and just have your immediate family have the front areas but you knew that would probably end up hectic with the strong personalities you had within your friend and family group so you kept it traditional. Your family/friends on one side and spence’s family/friends on the other

Memorable wedding, you were gorgeous and he was so handsome. You loved when Spencer got dressed up, it did something to you and you couldn’t wait for your honeymoon

It wouldn’t be anything over the top like The Bakers tried to gift you with, you just wanted something simple but nice with the man you loved

You were going to Palm Springs the next morning!!! Spending the night in the hotel

You were going to hold out even longer until the night you reached your honeymoon destination 😌

Spencer wanted the both of you to write your own vows and you sure didn’t know how you would compete with this guy. Spencer James always had a way with words!!!

He ofc had you a sobbing mess again but you knew it was never about out-showing the other

when you seal your marriage with a kiss, his hands rest securely on your hips with your hand cradling his jaw and you’re all smiles as the hall fills with cheers

“I love you, Mrs. James.” He’s got that smirk of a smile on his lips and love in his eyes

“As do I, Mr. James.” And you can’t wipe the smile from your own lips even if you tried

One thing you both know how to do is party so the reception goes on for awhile, until about 3 am even tho you both have to be on the road by 10 or a little later since check in isn’t until early afternoon

You’re both so giddy you can hardly sleep but you eventually do, you in your dress + Spencer in his dress shirt but he’s lost the tie and loosened his pants

Since Palm Springs is a 2 hr drive you’re reminiscing on how you basically taught Spencer how to drive and look at how far he’s come now with the rental you’re both using for 4 days and 3 nights

“so it’s my fault you don’t know how to instruct?” Which leads to harmless bickering over spencer’s road trip playlist

it’s been agreed that you each had an hour to play your playlists then for the left over minutes you’d listen to the radio once you got to your destination

your airbnb is REAL colorful and modern, not exactly your tastes but nonetheless it was your getaway from home. You were used to the desert while spencer? Not so much

“the hell was that?” Spencer is dodging and weaving especially if they fly

“looks like fire ants.” keep your distance.” “Why do you know what that is?” “I get stuck watching discovery channel with my dad when I can’t sleep and he’s always up. I saw one episode about them and we don’t want to mess with those bastards.”

you don’t do much with the rest of your day there, just enjoying each other’s company in the air bnb

You decide to shower while Spencer is ordering y’all your dinner from grubhub and deciding what you’re going to watch on firestick that you bought with you

you tend to take long showers so you’re just about done rubbing shea butter into your skin when Spencer announces that the food is here through the door

when you step out you’re on a mission with your silk robe, bustier, and garter

although you kept your own values of saving yourself until marriage—while Spencer was way more experienced you didn’t feel as nervous to get intimate with the man of your dreams

but that changed the moment his set his eyes on you

“what’s this?” He smirks, popping a fry into his mouth

You’re playing coy as your skin shines, leaning over to steal one of his fries. “My pajamas.”

He’s amused but definitely turned on, “oh aight, so that’s just the norm for you now?”

“I could change.” You pointed back to the where the bathroom sat

“I ain’t say all that, Mrs. James.” Spencer blinks then lifts his head upwards, “c’mere.”

And you move to sit on his lap with excitement even tho you think you hide it pretty well. You’ve always pictured how this would be and you knew from stories from your cousins and friends that half of them didn’t have the most romantic experience...

You didn’t need the rose petals and candles but you knew Spencer was a romantic at heart, plus you had plenty of time to see what was up his sleeve and knew this wouldn’t be the only time as of tonight. You were hoping!!!

“Are we starting dinner?” You ask, wrapping an arm across his shoulders but his eyes are set only on you

“I’m hungry for somethin’ else right now,” his nose presses against your beating throat, “and it just walked in here, looking good enough for this appetite.”

Now he’s kissing on your neck and when he gets to that sweet spot behind your ear he’s got the confirmation he needs but he needs to hear you say it. And he asks with his eyes which you reply with a dip of your head

Now he’s got his hands underneath your thighs, locking your legs around his waist for you and he’s off to your temporary bedroom

He’s always so gentle with you, even when he’s laying you down on this bed

“I promise the next time we do this, I’ll make the place look special for you.” He says into your neck and your nod as you feel the weight of him against you

You’re gasping for breath before he’s been fully touched you yet, “we still have the tub and a couple of days.”

He breathes out a laugh, “that we do. That we do.” Before your lips are brought back together

You know you are loved with the way Spencer touches you and speaks to you even in your most intimate moment

He builds you up before he gives himself all to you. It’s something you heard about, SEEN and knew it was crucial but you didn’t want to put too much logic in this moment. You don’t think you can even think straignt with the way you’re on fire for Spencer rn

And he’s know that but he needs you to be patient, he knows how to take his time. And he should know what he’s doing...he does

He’s seeing what your body likes, he’s watching his face even when you begin to whine for him

He knows when you’re truly ready even when you’re begging

He gives you your first climax with his mouth and you know you need more because you knew how much you loved his lips but you loved them even more now

“even better than I imagined,” he says with a lick of his lips from below before pressing a kiss on your abdomen and you’re still seeing stars

“you okay up there?” He asks. He’s always seeking reassurance from you. That’s too important to him, you’re too important to him

You have to say it as your vision slowly starts to splat back to normal, “I need you i-in— but there’s heat pooling in your cheeks. You’re a bit shy now as you’re getting in your head wondering how you must have sounded or looked in that moment of your first climax but it didn’t seem as if Spencer was disappointed. He seemed just as happy to please

He knows what you need. He worked with your body up to this moment

So he’s kissing up your body, slow and soft. He looks into your eyes before he glances over to grab his wallet from the night stand to grab protection

you didn’t think this far ahead but part of you wanted to know if there was a difference without, ofc you knew the risks without and you had forever to try so you made no comment about the choice to use protection

You wanted to do the honors, and so you did

You were surely in awe to be this close and personal with something you get to have for a lifetime

“Careful, something might fly in there.”

You can’t help but you roll your eyes and snort as Spencer places a kiss to your cheek before he reaches up to lock your hands together and up over your head, your wedding bands contrasting against the bright orange walls and your shea butter skin

“I’m ready.” You whisper, your eyes shifting from Spencer’s deep brown eyes to where your bodies would connect

Spencer hums as he keeps his eyes on yours before lining up, he has to free one of his hands to guide

and your mouth falls open with a slight arch in your back

He doesn’t move right away, he needs to be sure

when you lock both legs around his hips, tugging him closer than close to you, fully allowing him in your space, you then squeeze your hands tighter together, never wanting to let go

Spencer James was all you ever needed and you were more than thrilled to continue this journey of life with him

[amazingmaeve]

Going Home - Michael Gray

Main Masterlist // Peaky Blinders Masterlist

Summary: After his cousin and mother sent him to America Michael was angry with them but then he meet you. Then you guys go back to Birmingham with your kids and another on the way

AN: I haven’t seen season five but I know Michael isn’t the best character. And Gina doesn’t exist in this and John is alive. Also don’t judge me if i get anything wrong from the show.

Pairing: Michael Gray x Female!OC

Warnings: Pregnancy, Language, angst, alcohol

YOU and Michael met when he came to America. When he first arrived in America he was pretty pissed as his cousin and his mom sending him there. Plus he barely had no way to contact them and he knew they wouldn’t contact him either. He would probably stay there for the rest of his life he thought. He was bitter for the first weeks he was just angry and always mad at people. Until he met you.

You were working as a seamstress who makes suits and etc. in her own store. He ran into you on the streets and he was about to yell at you before he actually got a chance to look at you. He apologized for bumping into you and you waved it off and accepted his apology.

He suggested walking you back to the store you worked at. You blushed and nodded clearly smitten by him and everything he does and the way he spoke. He was smitten as well. On the way to the shop you almost tripped but he caught you. He thought how clumsy you were was very cute and the way you blushed when he caught you. As you were nearing your shop you said farewell to each other feeling sad he was leaving already.

But he came in the next day asking for a suit with a smirk on his face which made you get butterflies in your stomach like from the day before. You thought you’d never see this mad again in your life but apparently he wanted to see you again. You agreed on making him a suit and he asked you to dinner that night and you agreed feeling real giddy as you jumping around in your head.

You got your best dress and did your hair and make up real nice. You wanted to impress him but what you didn’t know you already made a great impression on him. He looked real nice as well as he put a different suit on but he looked real good. He took you to a nice restaurant and got you the best food there and it tasted good. You talked about your lives like how your father ran out on your mom and she became a single mother. And you always admired her. You weren’t that tough of a child to raise and you were a single child which made it easier.

He told you the story of him growing up in a village and that his name was Henry and then Tommy found him explaining his family wasn’t really his family. He moved to Birmingham and met his mom and cousins who got along until he came to America you didn’t ask why because it seemed like a sensitive topic.

After that night you guys were like glue, always at each other’s sides, going on dates every week. And two months later he asked you to move in with him and you were shocked but agreed with a smile and you already loved him so much.

Then not even a month later you were pregnant with your first child and you were scared to tell him. You hadn’t even told him you loved him. You didn’t even know if he wanted kids. but when you were about to tell him the big news he blurted out he loved you. You were shocked shocked but also very giddy and you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him happily saying you loved him as well.

You told him you were pregnant and hoped he wouldn’t be mad. And he wasn’t. He was a little surprised but happy nonetheless He asked you to marry him which you scoffed and rolled your eyes saying he only wanted to marry because you were pregnant. And you guys only knew each other for three months. But he told you that ‘you loved me and I love so why the hell not’. You thought about it for a few days and agreed wanting to do it as soon as possible so that you would be able to fit your wedding dress only being a months pregnant.

You got married a week after with your mom being the only one there. You gelt like the happiest girl alive.

Then months later you gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. And Michael suggested the name Anna saying it was his sisters name. You agreed because a few months earlier he told you he never met his sister and she died. Plus you thought it was a good name.

You got pregnant about 6 months later. God it felt like your family was growing every day. When you told you felt happy but he was even happier

The midwife also told you it was twins which as an even bigger shock and you were a little scared since it was two instead of one. Not only pushing one kids out but two. You only went through it once and it hurt then. But now twice the pain. Michael reassured you that you were strong woman and you could do it.

Three months later you being eight months pregnant and looked like you were about to pop, Michael told you some news. You found out you were pregnant at four months. It surprised it took so long for you to find out.

“My mom wants me to go back to Birmingham,” He told you one night when you guys were cuddling. You only asked about his family a few times and he told you almost everything about them. That they were blinders and his mother and cousin sent him here. You were kind of angry but happy because you wouldn’t have met him if they didn’t send him here. He told you about the Italians and you didn’t blame him for any of it since he thought his mom was still mad at Tommy and that’s why he didn’t tell him. Plus it was in the past and he hadn’t done anything to you to prove he was a monster.

“Why does she want you to come now,” You asked as you looked up at him. You heard about his mom and she seemed like nice person and you didn’t want hold a grudge against for what happened. But you wanted to be on Michaels side as well. But it seemed he gotten over it as well. But he had a little anger in the pit of his stomach that he could ignore.

“She says that she wants to settle things between us,” Michael explains looking down at you with love in his eyes. You both layer in silence for a second.

“So what are you going to do,” You asked as you traced your fingers along his chest.

“I think I should go,” He replied. “Patch things up with the family.”

“Well if you’re going I’m going,” You beamed while looking up at him with a smile on your face.

“Nope,” He disapproved and you looked up at him with a shocked look on your face.

“What why not,” You pouted whole looking up at him.

“Sweetheart you look like you are about to pop and I don’t want you to get hurt,” He cooed you in a stern voice. You knew that he was worried about you.

“I know but I want to meet your family and I want to make sure your okay while you’re there as well,” You told him. He didn’t seem faltered by your words. “Okay how about this if I feel like somethings wrong tomorrow I’ll stay with Anna if not we both go with you. And I won’t put my self in stressful situations,” You offered. He let out a deep sigh before being his hand up to rub his eyes.

“Fine,” he grumbled but before you could cheer he put his hand up. “But we make sure not to put you in ANY stressful situations,” He approves with a stern tone in his voice.

“Ok yep agreed,” You agreed happily with a smile on your face. A wave of tiredness crossed over you. “Let’s get to bed,” You yawned before curling into Michael.

Before you fell you asleep you heard a soft voice “I love you,”

As You Michael and Anna got arrived in Birmingham you started to feel nervous wondering what his family was like in person.

Michael told you that they were dangerous but to not be afraid because they wouldn’t hurt you.

You guys were on the train on your way to Small Heath. As you promised you didn’t put yourself in stressful situations. You were starting to feel a bit uncomfortable on the train and hoped you would get there soon.

Once the train stopped Michael tapped you on the shoulder when he noticed you didn’t get up.

“Come one love we’re here,” Michael coos as he stands pulling his daughter up with him.

You let out a yawn and stood up and stretched. God you could barely move without taking everything out.

“Ok I’m ready,” You sighed and looked at your daughter sleeping in Michaels arms.

Even though she was a little past 1 years old and knew how to walk she loved being in her dads arms. You smile at the two them.

Anna stirred in her sleep and rubbed her eyes with her tiny hands.

“Hey Anna were here,” Michael whispered to his daughter with a smile painted his lips. Anna smile and let out a little giggle.

“Daddy,” Anna let out. She has been saying some words ever since she turned a year and would try to form sentences.

You and Michael shared smiles before walking out onto the platform. He put Anna down. You guys where nervous about letting her walk but Michael held to her hand. You stood to his side while Anna was on his other.

You could tell he was nervous about seeing his mother.

“It’ll be ok Michael,” You whispered in his ear wrapping your hand around his.

Michael nodded doubt running through his veins. He felt extremely nervous about seeings his family again. And about them seeing you and Anna as well.

Then you saw Michael stare at a women with dark hair and high cheek bones. You guessed that was his mother.

“Stay here,” Michael whispered to you and put Anna’s hand in your own. You nodded and watched him walk towards the woman.

You saw that they talked for a minute then a smile was spread across the woman’s face as she hugged him. You saw Michael relax and hug her back.

You let out a smile at the reunion.

“Up,” Anna raised her arms indicating she wanted to be held. You laughed a little and bent down being careful of your belly and picked her up. She wrapped her legs around you watching out for your belly. She let out a little smile and played with your hair.

You looked up and saw that Michael and Polly were walking over to you. You would say you were nervous but that would be an understatement. She looked like a very intimidating woman and you’ve heard a lot about her from Michael.

“Mom this Y/N my wife,” Michael introduced two of you and pointed to your daughter. “And this is our daughter Anna.”

Michaels mom, Polly, looked at your daughter who was resting her head on your shoulder feeling a tad tired. You noticed that Polly was getting a bit teary eyed.

“Nice to meet y-you I’ve heard good things about you,” You stuttered a bit feeling nervous about meeting your husbands mother. She looked like she could be very intimidating at some points but now she hasn’t done anything to make you feel like that.

You put your hand out to shake but she pulls you in for a hug which was kind of uncomfortable with your belly and your daughter in your arms but you tried to hug back anyways. You didn’t want to seem rude.

“Anna after,” Polly trailed off looking at Michael who nodded knowing who she was talking about after she retreated from your hug. She pulled Michael into her arms and whispered something in his ear. “Let’s get you two home you two must be tired from the the ride.

You, Michael, and Anna walked into Pollys house which wasn’t huge but wasn’t small either. You thought it looked really comfortable which you loved. Anna seemed to be getting a bit fussy so Michael took her from your arms into his. Anna put her head into his neck drowsing off.

“I’m going to go lay her down it’s been a long day for her,” Michael told you before going upstairs to one of the rooms.

After Michael left you stood there awkwardly waiting for him to return or Polly to come back from the kitchen.

“Come on in I don’t bite,” Polly called out to you when she noticed you didn’t follow her to the kitchen. You blushed a little before entering the kitchen and sat on one of the chairs. “So has my son been treating well,” She asked you as she got some tea ready.

“Yes he has been a complete gentleman,” You reassured while giving her a smile you put your hands on your belly and felt one of the babies kicking.

“I’m guessing 8 months along and with twins,” Polly asked before sitting down as she noticed you rubbing your belly.

“Yes did Michael tell you,” You ask curiosity painting your face.

“Nope intuition,” Polly gave you smile which you returned.

“I don’t want to sound rude but I’m hoping I give birth soon its been a lot of uncomfortable months for me,” You explain as you try to get situated in the chair.

“I’d assume it would be uncomfortable for twins,” Polly teases while giving you a smirk.

“I’m kind of scared though,” You admitted.

“What are you scared of darling,” Polly asked as she looked at you with a worried look on her face. Even though she didn’t know you for long she felt that you changed her sons life and would be a good addition to the family.

“Well it hurt with Anna so I assume it will hurt twice as much with the twins,” You explain to her. “Michael always reassures me though but it doesn’t help that fear in that back of my head.”

“You’ll be fine I can tell you’re a strong woman,” Polly acknowledged while taking a sip from her tea. “And plus we can get the best doctors to help you through it,” She reassures you.

“I hope so,” You mutter looking down at your huge belly.

“Have you and Michael thought of any baby names,” She tries to distract you.

“We’ve has a few but nothing that’s stuck,” You explained. You thought if it was two boys Henry and William and if it was two girls Rose or Luna. Michael just told you whatever you wanted. Before Polly could say something Michael came down into the kitchen.

“Didn’t have to much fun without me,” Michael joked and kissed your forehead then sat down next to you.

“We were just discussing baby names,” You explain while makes an oh face. Before he can respond Polly interrupts.

“We’re having the family over so that we can celebrate the new family members to the family and your arrival,” Polly surprises you and Michael.

Great a family reunion with the whole family.

As the family rolled into the house you were introduced to everyone. Michael seemed to be taking to his cousins while you were talking to Esme, Ada and Polly. Linda was sitting down reading a book. Anna was asleep upstairs. You woke her her up to feed her and then a few hours later everyone rolled in. So you put her to bed not wanting her to be stressed.

“So you and Michael happy for the baby,” Ada asked as you guys sat food down on the table.

“Yes but it’s going to be more stressful with Anna and it being twins will make it harder of course,” You explain while setting some silverware down after setting down the potatoes.

“Yeah it was hard when I married John he already had a lot kids when that happened,” Esme joked with you while nudging your arm.

“Plus with you getting pregnant every couple years,” Ada jokes while Esme rolls her eyes. It didn’t look like she took it to heart though.

“I don’t think it should be to long now,” Polly told you pointing to your belly.

“Well I hope so,” You laughed while leaning against the table. Before you could speak you felt some pain in your stomach which made you groan a bit.

“You okay Y/N,” Ada asked concern lacing her voice.

“Think it might be soon than later.”

Turns out you were in labor because not 5 minutes later you felt your water break which made you groan as another contraction hit you. Ada and Esme helped you upstairs to one of the rooms and laid you down.

You could hear Michael and Polly arguing. You knew Michael wanted to be with you when you gave birth since he was their for Anna’s birth. As another contraction hit you someone ran into the room and began to soothingly rub your back.

You looked and saw that it was Michael which made you sigh in relief.

“Michael you aren’t going to leave me are you,” You whimpered while some tears travelled down your face. Michael soothed you while wiping away you’re tears.

“Don’t worry love I’m not going anywhere,” Michael whispered in your ear.

You smile but let out a moan when you felt another contraction hit. You could feel them getting closer and closer.

Polly and Ada came up with some supplies and got you ready and when she said push you pushed with all your might.

It took about 5 minutes before one of your babies were out. You let out a breath before letting out a sigh but knowing it wasn’t over.

“It’s a girl,” Ada smile at you while Polly cut the cord. She wrapped the baby in a blanket while handing her to Michael. Michael started down at you’re daughter in awe.

It was broke as you felt another contraction hit you. Polly told you to push and Michael was by your side with your second daughter. Trying to comfort you while holding the baby. Ada took the baby from Michael knowing that you need some comfort.

“I can’t do it,” You sobbed as you leaned back on the bed and wiped the tears from your eyes.

“Don’t worry darling just a few more pushes and you’ll be done,” Michael cooed you.

You nodded before pushing again and only a few minutes later another baby was out you let out a happy sigh while leaning back on the pillow sweat coating your body.

“Another girl,” Polly whispered handing her to you after she cut the cord. Ada handed Michael the first baby and you looked at your babies in awe.

Ada and Polly left you alone for some privacy.

“They’re so beautiful,” You whispered while kissing your daughters nose.

Michael was about to respond before you guys heard someone say, “Mommy,” You looked up and and saw Anna standing there with a smile on her face.

“Come here sweet heart say hi to your sisters,” Michael smile as your first daughter came over to you and tried getting on the bed but failed a few times before succeeding. She went up to lay next to you staring at the new baby.

“What should we name them,” You ask while looking at Michael trying to wrap your arm around Anna with a baby in your arm.

“How ‘bout we both name one,” Michael suggested. You nodded and Michael whispered “Emily.”

“That’s a beautiful name Michael,” You whispered as Michael came and sat down next to you guys. “I’m thinking for this one Rose,” You suggested with a smile.

“I love it,” Michael pressed a small kiss to your lips.

You guys chuckled quietly when you heard Anna start to snore and you weren’t to far behind her.

Michael smiles warmly at all of you. His family.

[ravenadottir]

cmm

one last time, because i hope i never have to talk about this again. wanna know how tragic it was to wake up in the morning and spend a solid thirty minutes on today's episodes?

i'll tell you... through bullet points... SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT.

🚨🚨 SPOILER ALERT! 🚨🚨

sooooooo... episode 9, filler. @bobby-mckenzie called it yesterday, and yes, oh, yes it was. not even a good filler, 'cause if episode 9 was a snack, it would be yogurt. (shout out to elladine for this reference).

next we have the confirmations fusebox thought it was important to address, such as:

- gary bleaches his hair. my whole trauma is clear, thank you so much for the observation. i would've died of curiosity if you hadn't confirmed it. except WE ALL KNEW IT, and it was the one fun thing to banter about, so thanks ? no "good effort" medals for you.

- rocco has a big dick. i don't know what to tell you except... yay? for chelsea? my mc is not bouncing on that so why should i care??? what do you want me to do with this information? next time i replay s2, look him up and down and go "rocco... NICE COCK." ?? that's... weird that they felt the need to put this out there.

- lucas actually planning a van/bike trip with rocco. I'M REALLY GLAD THIS IS THE LAST TIME I SEE LUCAS NOT BEING LUCAS.

- MAYO LOG, 'BON HAPPY EAT' AND PEOPLE SAYING BILL SOUNDS LIKE GARY. I- PLEASE. i'm ✨disgusted✨

- gary misspelling a word that's so fucking obvious and common? really going out of your way and reinforcing the working class stereotype here, fusebox. they really grabbed gary by the tiddies and said "you're not gary, you're his dumb cousin, barry."

- rahim in fact brought the horse for his chad character, and you know what?? WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SEE THE DAMN HORSE. i repeat, THEY COULDN'T DRAW THE HORSE! do i understand how he knew about the murder mystery? no, i do not. am i gonna play it back to remember? NO ❤, I SIMPLY DO NOT CARE. CONSISTENCY LEFT THE BUILDING OVER A YEAR AGO, and i'm about to as well.

- "love on the prairie", by hannah GODDAMN griffiths??? can you be more obvious? IT'S A MIRACLE HOMEGIRL GOT TO WRITE A WHOLE GODDMAN BOOK OVER WHAT... 5 HOURS SHE WAS IN THERE? moving on.

- hannah got a surname but not... noah? carl? henrik? kassam? ibrahim? hope? priya? lottie? marisol? like- THANKS, I'LL MAKE SURE TO MAKE A FULL-ON FANFIC AND MOODBOARD WITH THIS PIECE OF SHIT INFORMATION. i'm sorry, i'm getting aggressive again, but it really tickles the pits of hell inside of me that we got her surname and not anyone else's. good for the... 3 hannah stans that are with her i guess??? 🗣 AND SHE WASN'T EVEN THERE!!!!!

- oh yeah, marisol was the killer in mine. i really tricked myself into believing this wasn't gonna be a "BLUE'S CLUES" children's detective club, and the nail thing was gonna be a ✨MISDIRECT✨. my bad. i will bring zero expectations with me next time.

- again. if this whole special was to finalize some plotlines the players needed to be unvailed, why didn't all the characters get surnames? THERE'S NO REASON FOR THAT.

ALL I HAVE TO SAY IS 'WOW'.

did i leave something untouched? i think so, because married mc's get some consequences if they cheated?

not if you're single tho. nothing interesting happens if you chose to bed someone. which is weird that i banged gary but didn't get a scene with him ?? like, nothing ??

besides that, that's all it happened. which means this whole special could've been resumed within FIVE episodes. not ten! five was more than enough.

did the single mc get a cool scene with chelsea at the end? one that i actually pictured it could be chelsea and mc in the finale of season 2 if mc is single? yes, i did. was it worth it? NO. it was the only consistent thing on chelsea so far, and for that, i... thank ... you? I DON'T. THE WHOLE THING WAS A WASTE OF MY TIME AND ENERGY.

but if you wanna see it, here it is. they laugh a lot and made me think there was some funny oregano in the drinks, but eventually they got to tell each other how special they are to one another. it was actually nice, but that's the only cumpliment i have.

this would've been perfect on afterparty if mc stole the money and was single. here? "you can always count on chelsea" should've happened back then, when mc needed a shoulder to lean on, but i digress!

i was also disappointed thinking these creepy pictures could mean something, and they were the house owner's, which would turn out to be someone importnat, but hey, I GUESS I SET MYSELF TO FAILURE EXPECTING THE BARE MINIMUM.

the only thing i truly thought about chelsea and how she's treated by men was confirmed but i can't give props to them because... RANDOM? OBVIOUS? HAS BEEN SAID BEFORE?

IN CONCLUSION:

i'm honestly sad that they felt the need to ruin all these characters for us, just so they would have a small money grab. like-

STOP INVESTING ENERGY AND RESOURCES ON SPECIALS THAT DO NOTHING FOR THEM. PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU. FOCUS ON THE NEW SEASON AND PLEASE, STOP WITH THE SPIN-OFFS.

milking this season just so you wouldn't do them justice?? no one asked for this. no one asked for yet another piece, if you can call it that, that just doesn't bring anything to the table. they ruined a good thing and for what?

like-

this is the type of thing people remember hating but can't remember the reasoning behind said hatred. you know why? THE WHOLE THING WAS BUSTED.

and the fact that they had zero care for female li's?? henrik? carl? hope? the actual history about the others? the whole mystery was so forced and unfunny how obvious it was.

no other new layers on anything except for disgusting foods chelsea made??

fusebox really out here saying they put some effort into this.

[jinpanman]

mai out here living her main character life 😌 we love to see it 😌

i am living vicariously through you and it’s bringing me so much joy to see your little updates every now and then

Ommgggg thanks;w; the mc life is so stressful tho omfg i am not built for this

should i tell you some cute things about vegan boy?<3

He let me take control of the music in the car 😍

He says "stooop" in this super cute whiny voice when i tease him about something

He walked around all new years eve day with me with a bloody ankle and never complained once (i didn't even know until the day after!😭 i felt so bad)

We shared all the food and all the drinks. Don't mind me as i go a lil delulu over all the indirect kisses hahaha (I FORGOT TO ADD BUT HIS BOTTOM LIP CAUGHT AGAINST MY FINGER WHEN HE WENT IN TO EAT THE BURGER I WAS HOLDING UP FOR HIM JSHDJSJDKS I ALMOST DIED)

He loves chocolate and hates seafood (didn't like it even before he became vegan) -- i chose the right man lol

HE LIKES TO DRIVE. Oh god. You have no idea how happy i am about this lol when i tell you liking to drive & not liking seafood are two of the top criteria for the man i end to marrying..... i got my eyes on him!!!🤣

He's super considerate of my fruit allergy 🥺 (which isn't even a big deal for me i just suffer through it bc people like fruit. HE SAID "I CAN LIVE WITHOUT FRUIT" UNPROMPTED (i'm sorry bby but i can't give up meat for u)

He thinks koi fish are cute (I do not)

He sucks at taking pictures lol

He joked about us & some friends going to hawaii for 2 weeks. I told him everyone's gonna leave him after week 1 and he said "You're staying with me!" (and then amended himself by adding on [friend here lol] 🤣)

He also sucks at singing but it's really cute when he sings lol

He sang me 2 seconds of this one hmong love song that translates to "pretty girl you're the one i like the most" AAAHHHHH

He's really easy to talk to. Like it's just so easy

He bought me this penguin pen case he saw me eyeing in a stationary shop 🥺🥺🥺

He let me shop in that store for however long i wanted to 🥺 and didn't mind waiting in line with me

He texts me about things we talked about. Like this hotel i told him i would not be able to afford bc it looked expensive. He actually looked it up a few days later and told me i was right (😍 love a man who knows when a woman is right)

He offered to take me to a shop across the street just for the bathroom bc the one in the restaurant we were eating in was really gross

He stole his cousin's clothes (bc his house was too far away) to come eat lunch with my family

Literally everyone i know loves him

He does this thing where he sniffs a lot

He's tall

He always offers to take me home after a hangout even though 1) my cousin's always around to take me home and 2)he lives on the complete opposite side of town where i was staying

Vegan pizza

He made sure to get me boba during our nye trip (i forgot all about it lol but he didn't 🥺)

He is so innocently optimistic about things that I'm so drained from. It's kind of refreshing

He gels his hair and it looks so good

He has a nice happy trail

He fed me a lot 🥺

He sat next to me at church 🥺🥺 apparently when i moved from my spot to talk with family and he didn't see me he sat somewhere else but when i moved back to my original spot so did he

(Story time: before service, some old lady behind us "whisper" asked a friend if we just got married lloooolllll and our friends being her usual self, she was all "oh nooo they just started talking! They're not married yet."💀💀 there is no way he didn't hear that either omfg and yes we both pretended we didn't hear that lol)

He also fed my family 🥺 like wtf 🥺 heart eyes 🥺

He's really cute

HE LIKES KPOP

HE DOESN'T JUDGE ME FOR KPOP bc he is also in this blackhole with me!!!!

Tbh I'm not used to having a guy "chase after" me. Bc I'm usually the one who initiates things. So him going for all these things (INCLUDING THE BTS CLUBBING EVENT OMG) to be with me makes me not know what to do with myself lololol

Ok. I should stop now lol this got really long oops