#it took everythingvi had not to start smashing every plate and glass we had bc i spilled some soap into a glass i was still drinking from.
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Mm lovely how quickly feeling mildly frustrated and irritable escalates into full fledged meltdown anyway I GOTTA fins something to do other than stare at my phone today so. Bye
#literally if i hold it a second longer i am going to slam it into the floor until it smashes.#it took everythingvi had not to start smashing every plate and glass we had bc i spilled some soap into a glass i was still drinking from.#i got stuck in a game and slammed the controller against my head hard enough to leave a like 2 inch high bump#i want to throw myself through the window. i want to go for a walk and jump in the river. i want to stand in front of a train.#i want the bannana flavoured cyanide from fallout and the energy drink that makes you high from silt verses#i want it to be fucking OVER and i am SO. FUCKING. SICK. of people telling me itnwill get better because FUCKING WHEN#WHEN WILL IT. ITS BEEN A YEAR AND A HALF.#im literally just existing for weeks at a time until payday and i get to feel alive again for maybe 2 days before the debt settles back#i cant. i cant live like this man
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