#it straight up did not want dave to enjoy those snacks

[suddenly-stickmin]

Could I give Dave some snack bags? 🛍️ He needs a treat too!

Dave appreciates the snacks people [and Johnny] have offered! :]

[whump-town]

would you be willing to write something inspired by the song "All For You" by Night Riots? no worries if not, I just think you'd be great at emotionally hurting us using the song

I love the Night Riots and it took me a hot second to figure out what I thought this song was about? My original idea was malicious and I decided against it and went with Hotch and Jack instead but that's not to say this is... better. I think the original meaning is more romantic but it's never struck me as a romantic song so I didn't write it that way (but I'd write it that way if you'd like)

The divorce happened long before Jack could remember. His first memories are of his parents apart. His mother liked the park. Climbing up on the slides and pushing him too high on the swings. She was adventurous and thriving, every moment he spent with her was packed with a new plan. A new trip. His father didn’t enjoy the loud screams of the other children, got nervous around the parents. He preferred the museum. Jack can remember sitting on his shoulders, his father’s trembling hand outstretched in front of them as he explained a painting or an artifact. There is a single memory that he has of them together.

There’s a bruise across his father’s eye, bleeding down into his lip. The colors are distorted, yellow and purple. A rainbow across his pale skin. Jack touches it curiously, tries to rub it off with his thumb but his mother pulls him away. She redirects him to the playground and promises they’ll follow after in a moment, go play. He remembers looking back at them, shouting for them at the top of the slide. He’d been so overjoyed at the sight of them together he hadn’t cared why. They’d waved back and he went on. He looked back at them several times. His father so small tucked against his mother’s side, her fingers soothing back his cowlicks back the same gentle way she does with Jack’s hair.

After she died, he spent a lot of time with other people. Over the course of the seventy-nine days following the death of his mother, he saw his father once, at the funeral. He had just come out of the bathroom, Jessica caving to his light tantrum and letting him go by himself. He walked straight into Emily.

“Oh,” she said softly. With a rustle of her dress, she knelt down beside him. “I was wondering where it was you were hiding,” she whispered. She had been the last familiar face he saw before they went into Witsec. She sat outside his father’s hospital room and talked to him, tried to be louder than his parents only a few feet away. It was her that assured him his father looked rather poorly but was okay, she would take care of him. She and Uncle Dave would make sure he would be okay. She’d been waving when he looked back over his shoulder at the hospital, he’d watched her disappear from the car window.

Jack hadn’t seen his father since. Has no memory of being pulled out of the box or talking to him on the phone minutes before that fateful shot.

Jack squirms, discomfort twisting his stomach in a way he doesn’t know how to explain. He knows he’ll be in trouble if he’s caught talking to her. Grandpa won’t be happy. “Do you know where Aunt Jess is?” he asks instead, looking around Emily to try and find her.

Emily shakes her head, “no sweetheart, I don’t. Why don’t we try to find her?”

Emily led him around the hall by the hand and that’s when Jack sees him. All he can see is his back but Jack knows it’s him. He wants to run over, to shout his name, and be pulled into one of his crushing hugs but he stays grappled to Emily. As if sensing him close, Hotch turns. They look at each other for a long moment, neither moving nor calling for the other.

He tells Jessica later as she’s tucking him into bed.

“Why didn’t you say hi, honey? That would have made his day.”

Jack hides his face in his pillow, shakes his head. No, it wouldn’t have.

They passed him around. He spent nine days with his grandparents and he learned quickly not to ask for his mother or father. Neither would be coming to get him. He played in the backyard and talked to them, shadows of them that he imagined there. His father laying on a picnic blanket, reading some old dusty book that smells weird, and his mother encouraging him to kick the ball back. With the sun on his back, he could nearly imagine them here. How it would feel to have his mother kiss his face again, to be held tightly to her chest until he begs to be put back down. To lay down beside his father, his head on his chest, and listening to the rumble of his voice through the rattling of his ribs.

He spends thirteen consecutive days with Jessica. She promised him his father was coming. “Give him time, sweetheart. He’s coming.”

Nearly a month. Jack stops hoping. He stops dreaming about those sunny days in the yard. Long days at the park and the way the world shifts when he’s atop his father’s shoulders looking down. Twenty-six days and his father shows up with a knock at the door. He was left with the neighbor, his grandparents, and Jess both having to leave. They come home in a fury, no one speaks to him as his clothes are packed. His toys were thrown in a suitcase.

His father looks so different. Tall and willowy, his limbs hanging down in a somber haunted curtain. His hands were in bandages, shaking at his sides. The same suit he wore to court that day hanging off of him. Jack hadn’t run immediately to him. He looked to his grandparents, huddled by the stairs and angry. To Jessica with tears in her eyes. He wasn’t sure if he was allowed to go or even if he should.

“Jack?” his father simply knelt to the floor. Forced his body into something smaller, sinking to the same height as his son. He looked more like a tired beast falling to the ground, a great huffing dying thing giving up its fight. “I missed you, buddy.” His voice cracks, his lip trembles but he doesn’t cry. “Do you--” he has to clear his throat. Has to wipe his eyes. “If you’d like we can go to my house now.”

Jack looks to his grandparents again, he doesn’t understand what’s happening.

Hotch smiles, tears seeping down his face, “you don’t have to come with me.” He tries to sound encouraging, to make it sound like he’s okay with whatever Jack chooses. If he’d rather stay with his grandparents that’s okay but it won’t be. Hotch can’t go home to that empty apartment again. He can’t keep living with his son torn away. “You can stay here, Jack.”

Jack shakes his head, anxiously he brings his fingers to his mouth. He looks to his grandparents again, to Jess expecting someone to tell him what to do. “You want me to?” he asks softly. “To go with you?”

Hotch chokes on a sob, nods his head when he can’t trust himself to say yes.

Jack runs to him, collides right into his chest, and pushes his face into his father’s shirt. Clings to him.

Hotch cups Jack’s head closer, sobbing no matter how badly he wishes he could maintain his control. He hasn’t seen his son in months. He’d felt the rejection and the fear in his eyes when they saw each other at the funeral, how clear it was that Jack wasn’t even sure that Hotch loved him.

Foyet had taken Jack but Hotch had pushed him away and then he nearly lost him. Haley’s parents wanted him, proper retribution for killing their daughter and he had nearly nothing to hold himself upright with. No rights to claim Jack. Could he name Jack’s favorite cartoon? Did he know Jack’s favorite color? Hotch hadn’t seen him in so long. He knew that Jack only ate the banana snacks when he was a baby. He slept with a nightlight of a firetruck and a stuffed bear named Nemo, who was sometimes also called other names depending on Jack’s mood. That at four his favorite color was yellow because that’s what Haley’s favorite color was. That Jack didn’t watch cartoons because he only ever wanted to watch Finding Nemo and Brother Bear. So no, no he didn’t know any of those things. Not anymore. He chose to keep his son alive over keeping him nearby, close enough to learn those things.

He thought the courts would rule with Haley’s parents.

He’s in no mental place to be raising a son on his own. His apartment is a mass of boxes as Roy had coldly pointed out, they’d been separated for nearly two years and he still hadn’t unpacked. He didn’t deserve it but he won.

“I thought--” Jack hiccups into his shoulder, fingers clenching Hotch’s jacket as tight as he can. “I thought you didn’t love me anymore.”

Hotch shakes his head, tries to pull Jack closer. Tighter. “No,” he promises, hoarsely. “No, buddy, I’d never stop loving you.”

[ramp-it-up]

Sundancer

Pairing: Rafael Casal x Reader

Word Count: 4.2k

Warnings: Minors DNI, Some pictures, Angst, Pining, drinking, explicit language, oral sex (female/male receiving), love fluff. All errors my own.

A/N: This an ask from @honeysucklechocolatedrippin​ from the 100 smut prompts ask list. I got caught up with this one because I went back to the Show Runner AU.  I kinda love these two.  Hope you enjoy. Read Show Runner.

-------

This press tour was going to be all work. No play. 

Those were the strict rules that you were given.

This was the premiere film and television festival and January in Park City could be a fun, wild place and time, but you were on the clock. 

There would be no open flirting, touching, or even covert fucking while the cast was there. 

You listened to the lecture and smiled and nodded when appropriate.

Truth be told, you really weren’t paying attention, just waiting on your knees, naked and wet, to suck the shit out of his dick. 

When he gave you permission to of course.

You were determined to suck all those stupid ideas out of his brain along with all his cum when he gave you the chance. 

And Rafael was, indeed, without much coherent thought when you were done.

_____

Wednesday 

That conversation was of no consequence to you four days later when you landed in Park City. 

Daveed and Rafa had been there for two days and the rest of the cast was trickling in. 

You gathered your bag while answering a few questions from the paps and headed to your hotel alone, following the driver who held your name up outside baggage claim to a luxury suv.

You texted Rafael that you had landed, to which he just replied, “Good.”

No, ‘how was your flight,’ nothing. 

You sighed, assuming he was busy. 

He had been texting you nonstop for the past three days and now he wanted to play you. 

That was cool.

You relaxed as you took in the snowy scenery of snowy Park City. 

You were taken to a stunning tiny little chalet at the edge of the city and halfway up the mountain. 

The views were spectacular, the cute cozy kitchen fully stocked, and the fireplace was bomb.

As you took in all the antler decor, you texted Rafa again, hyped at the accommodations.

This is dope!

You made sure your cleavage was right in your v-neck sweater and took a selfie of you from above in the bedroom. 

I can’t wait to be on my knees for you later.

You saw the thought bubbles, but no response.

Cool cool cool. 

If that’s what he wanted. That’s what he would get. Ice.

You shook your head and looked in the refrigerator for water. You also found your favorite snacks. 

Production thought of everything. You’d thank Gwen later.

You relaxed on the couch until it was time to get ready for the mixer. 

The car was ready to go at 6:45, in time to get you fashionably late to the Television mixer at the Waldorf Astoria at 7.

Because of all the traffic, you didn’t arrive until 7:30, but you were chilling. You spotted your crew immediately, partly because they were the loudest. 

You loved this new family you made.

“Ayyyy! What’s cracking! We thought you’d never make it. Late flight? You want a drink?”

You laughed at Daveed, seeing that he was on his way to getting lit.

“I’ll have what you’re having.” 

He raised his cute ass eyebrow at you. “This grown folks shit. You sure?”

“Yes. I’m grown. I need to catch up to you! I misjudged the time to leave my chalet. What time did you all leave yours?”

“Ummmm. I walked downstairs like 20 minutes ago. The whole cast is staying here. You’re the only one staying on the other side of town.”

“Oh.” 

You didn’t know what to say as Daveed turned to go get your drink.

You looked around and saw a lot of actors you’d love to work with, some you already had, and some you knew to stay away from.

You spotted Rafa’s golden hair on the other side of the room. 

You weren’t going to go after him, and you didn’t need to, because some of your cast mates enveloped you and Daveed brought you a drink.

You were having too good a time to worry about Mr. Artistic Integrity.

You two circled the room, never really ending up in the same place. You finally saw him with Gwen and got a chance to talk. Rafa saw you approach. He nodded.

“Hey, Long time no see. You make it in ok ?”

You looked at Rafael for an extra beat. He’d seen you up close and personal three days ago when you’d ridden his face. 

But you were an actor. You could play this game.

“Hey Casal. Yeah, I got a few hours ago.” 

You turned to the logistics producer. 

“Gwen! My chalet is so dope!”

She raised her eyebrow at you. 

“That’s great! So, you wanted peace and quiet and away from the rest of us, ay?” Gwen laughed as you and Rafa smiled politely. You were seething. 

“Trying to avoid all the parties. I get it now, although I thought it was weird that you declined accommodations.”

“You know our girl, always a loner.”

Rafael took a sip of his drink, looking at you over it. Your blood boiled but you turned and smiled at Gwen.

“Yeah. On my INFJ shit. What’s the lineup for tomorrow?”  

You made small talk to avoid cussing Rafael the fuck out. He stood there for a minute, listening and being an adorable muthafukin asshole. 

Other people came up and you didn’t even notice Rafa step away. But you spotted him, in a corner with that little twat Ava with the tight little body. Just his type.

He saw you stalking out of the mixer as he chatted her up.

—-

Two hours later, you were cozy in the hot tub, smoking some kush to relax, scrolling your phone. 

A TMZ post from your explore page caught your eye. 

There was a picture of Daveed, next to Rafa and Ava, who looked pretty close and fucking beautiful together. 

The gossip site gushed over the picture of the Bay Boys, noting the ‘adorable couple’ and their mingling at the mixer and somehow sneaking in a not so subtle hint that they were staying at the same hotel.

That was the final straw. You saw it all. Rafa wanted you far away from him while he fucked this little miniature Bratz doll. Bet.

It was only midnight. You were going to get your own plastic action figure for the night.

——

Thursday 

The next morning, you met up with the crew at the suite which was set up for the series press day. 

You went straight to Chelsea who was set up in the bedroom of the suite.

You gave her a hug and took off your sunglasses. Your eyes were puffy.

“Damn girl. You did have fun last night. I got just the thing for those circles.”

You breathed a sigh of relief and let her work her magic.

You emerged ten minutes later and went and got something to eat and a bottle of water from the catering station set up in the kitchen. You watched D and Rafa charm the interviewer. 

You took a deep breath. You could do this.

Ten minutes after that, you find yourself sitting in a chair with the cast lined up, somehow seated next to Rafael.

As the first interviewer was setting up, you got comfortable in your chair. Being a professional.

“I see you had fun last night.”

You looked over at Rafael as if surprised to see him there.

“I’m sorry?”

He smirked at you.

“I said it looks like you had fun with Michael last night.”

He held up his phone and you squinted at a post of you and your new friend, a highly sought after actor who had been in one of Rafa’s favorite movies. 

The pic was from after you went back out to the club last night. You were hugged up close.

You looked in his eyes and saw that he felt some kinda way. He had some fucking nerve.

You smirked. 

“Yeah. He’s really truly a dope person. Not just beauty, but brains too. I love an intelligent man. We… talked all night.” 

Rafa’s smile slipped. You sat back and put on a megawatt smile for the reporter.

The entire day was filled with your secret shots and animosity toward Rafa. 

You couldn’t wait to talk to him in private and tell him not to call your cell phone ever again.

Reporter: “This show has many complex relationships, and you are at the center of two of them that are just developing as the series begins. What do you do to ease into a new relationship?”

You leaned back and crossed your legs.

“That is a great question. Let’s just take an example of, say, meeting someone at... a club?”

Daveed leaned in front of Rafa and said, “This is not a true story from last night by the way.”

“Of course not,” you quickly replied and winked. Everyone laughed, everyone but Rafa.

“What I’ve found recently that works wonders is: ‘Oh my god you’re so much better than the last person I was with.’”

Everyone was dying laughing.

Rafa choked on his water. You leaned over and patted him on the back. “You good?”

He just glared at you. You shrugged and kept it moving.

“No, but really. You should start off in a relationship where you can be open and honest. There’s really no relationship if you can’t have that.”

Rafael cleared his throat, but you refused to look at him.

The press day continued.

After eight hours of interviews, you were ready to get out of there, so while Rafa and D were playing host, you managed to get out and to the car. 

You were exhausted of the tension.

On your way to the chalet, Rafa texted you.

‘We need to talk.’

You huffed. Now he wanted to talk. 

Well, tough shit. 

You blocked his number. 

You couldn’t function like this right now. You and him could break it off next week in LA. He was right, you were on the clock.

That night at the Midnight showing, you sat with Michael. 

Might as well try to have some fun. The paparazzi were snapping lots of pictures with you two.

While Mike took a quick interview, you made your way to the bar alone.

“You’ve not answered any of my texts. Or my calls.” 

You rolled your eyes at Rafael.

“You’ve texted and called?” 

You shrugged and took a drink.

“Look. We can do all that back in Cali next week. Gotta keep it professional here, isn’t that the deal?”

You downed your drink and walked back over to Michael, Rafael boring a hole in your back. 

He left you alone after that.

——

Friday

The next day and night were much the same, a cast interview and screening of two episodes during the day and another industry party at night. 

Rafa being so busy made it easy to stay away from each other.

You got back to your place with a bottle of tequila about midnight. 

You were flying out the next day and you should have some fun, even if it was not what you’d envisioned before you arrived in Park City. 

You hated Rafael Casal. 

But you refused to cry. Again.

An hour later, you looked up from your drunken haze to see Rafa standing over you. 

He looked so damn good in this dream.

“You shouldn’t drink a whole bottle of tequila in a hot tub, especially alone.”

“What the fuck do you care? You’re probably fucking Ava ten ways from Sunday right now.”

Dream Rafa raised his eyebrow at you and shook his head.

“Why would I want to fuck Ava?”

“Right? Especially when you could have all this.”

You stood up, almost falling and showing off your wet, naked body.  You giggled as he appreciated you, his eyes sweeping down your body.

Dream Rafa moved closer to you and grabbed your hand as you wobbled. 

“Let’s get out and get you some water.”

He helped you out and wrapped you in one of the huge white fluffy robes that you’d found in the closet.

He led you to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator.

You drank, your head clearing, but just a bit.

You kept staring at Dream Rafa, who was regarding you steadily, a weird look on his face.

When you finished, he walked you to the bedroom and watched as you lay down. You looked at the clock on the bedside table. It was 1:30 am.

You opened your robe and turned to see Dream Rafa in bed with you.

“How convenient. I’m so so horny Dream Boy. Haven’t had any dick since last week.” 

You untied the robe and grabbed your breasts, squeezing them and rolling your nipples, arching your back.

Rafael watched you hungrily.  

“Help me to get off. Fuck me, Dream lover. The real Rafa doesn’t want me anymore…”

You moved your hand down to your core and started playing in it, moaning and watching Rafa watch you.

As he licked his lips, you brought your hand up and let him taste the wetness on your fingers. He hummed, then took your hand in his.

“Not like this. I want you. Fully present and clear headed. But I want you. And we need to talk.”

He kissed the palm of your hand and covered you with the robe again.

You groaned and turned away from him.

“Even the Rafael of my dreams reject me? I can’t believe I’m in love with such a jackass.”

You didn’t feel Rafa pull you close as you started shoring.

—

Saturday

You woke up alone, mad at the sunlight. Your head was pounding. 

Your mouth was parched, but you found a bottle of water on the bedside table. 

You grabbed it, grateful that you got it on the way to the bedroom last night. 

As you sat up and drank, you groaned as you thought back to your dream. 

You had to get him out of your system.

You got up and went to the kitchen, halfway expecting to see him there. 

You sighed with something that must have been relief when he wasn’t there. 

You took your water and some grapes to the little kitchen bar and sat there, eating and drinking slowly with your head in your hand.

You jumped when you heard a key in the front door and stared when Rafa let himself in. 

“Look who’s up. Bet you’ve got a doozy of a headache.” 

You just continued to gape as he put his bags down on the counter. He handed you a bottle of aspirin.

“You’ll need these.” He put some pedialyte in front of you. “And this.”

“Wait. Did you just let yourself in? With a key?”

“Yeah. This is my chalet. I own it.”

Your mouth dropped open. 

“I thought you had a hotel room.”

“I do. This is business so production put the cast up there. D and I decided to join.”

Your heart clenched at the fact he did not want you there too. What was this reality? Then you thought about the dream.

“Wait. Were you really here last night?” 

You were confusion.

Rafa smiled at you. 

“You want something to eat? Gotta get something in your stomach besides tequila and grapes.” 

You groaned and held your head at the realization that last night was not a dream.

“Fuck. Did I say all that? Did I do all that? Out loud?” 

You peeked at him through your fingers.

That smile. “Yeah.” 

You were mad. He looked to fucking happy. 

“Well, don’t take it personal. I was zooted. When I’m sober, I hate you Rafael.”

He frowned. “Are you sober now?”

You opened the bottle of aspirin and drank some pedialyte. 

“Unfortunately, yes. Very sober.”

Rafa moved next to you.

“I’m going to come closer so I don’t have to yell.”

He tipped your chin up with two fingers.

“I can’t believe I’m in love with a fucking brat.”

You were ready to fight.

“I’m a brat? I’m a BRAT?” 

You leaned back, your hands on the counter behind you to get some space from the electricity bouncing between you.

“You ignore me as soon as I land in the same city as you, and then you put me out here in this secret hideaway so you can fuck with that Ava chick.” 

You closed your eyes because you’d be damned if you cried right now. 

“I thought we agreed that we’d talk to each other before we tired of each other and got with other people?”

Rafa leaned close to you, caging you in with his arms on the counter beside yours. 

You could barely breathe, the emotions were getting the better of you. You just wanted to kiss him.

“Who told you that I fucked Ava?” 

This time you raised your chin on your own.

“No one had to tell me. I saw the pictures of you two together. I can read, Rafa.”

“Not very well in this situation, I’m afraid.”

Rafa shook his head and looked down. Then looked back up at you with those damn eyes.

“You also don’t listen. Did you even hear what I said? I just said I love you.”

You just stared at him.

“Wait… what?”

Rafa brought his hips closer to yours, standing up tall. You wanted them on you.

“I love you, you fucking brat. Why would I want Ava when the woman I love has all this.”

And he reached for you, opening the tie on your robe. He sighed as he moved his hands on your brown skin. He was home.

“I want you to listen. Listen before you jump ahead and try to argue.”

You were about to say something and clamped your mouth shut at his warning glance.

“I told you, this was work. And we agreed not to go public with our relationship yet.”  

He saw you wanting to protest.

“We agreed.” 

His hands spread against your stomach, thumbs on your warm nipples.

“I wasn’t ignoring you, I was controlling myself. I wanted to meet you at the airport, but the paps are swarming.”

Rafael's blue eyes were now dark.

“And I didn’t stash you away because I wanted to fuck Ava, but because this is my home and I wanted you in it.” 

Rafa finally kissed you, and you took his tongue in your mouth, wanting to own a part of him.  Your moan while you kissed was getting him even harder.

“And when you sent me that picture of you in the bedroom, I wanted to run over here and take you in every room,  but I couldn’t. Still working. Just had to jack off when I could. To that picture.”

You moaned as his words made you drip down your thigh.

He pressed his pelvis to you and you could feel how hard he was. You took a ragged breath and forced your hands to remain on the counter. 

But you looked up into those burning blue eyes. You were wet and ready.

“It was killing me knowing that you were so close, sleeping in my bed without me, naked in my hot tub without me, and that I couldn’t touch you, hold you. Fuck the shit out of you. Hear you scream my name.”

“Tire of you? God, I wish I could get tired of you. I want you all the time, I can hardly function when you’re not around.”

He kissed across your collarbone to the other side of your neck. You were definitely weak.

“I was coming over that first night, but I saw you going out. To the club. Where it seems you hooked up with Mike.” 

Rafa bit down on your pulse point.

“Rafa, I…”

Rafa licked the spot he just bit. 

“Shhh. I know you didn’t get with him, but you were a bit of a bitch at the Q and A day. And then you took him to the midnight screening.”

Rafa was appraising your body possessively now.

“You tried to make me think that you were with him; that he was touching you like this.”

Rafa grabbed your breasts and squeezed your nipples between your fingers. You arched into his hands.

“It was like you were teasing me.” 

His hands moved down your torso and around to your ass, squeezing and pulling your cheeks apart and ghosting your intimate parts with his fingers.

“You know I don’t like to be teased.”

He released you and took two steps back, leaving you feeling bereft.

You were panting in the middle of his kitchen. You felt what it was like to be teased.

“Rafa, I’m sorry. Please…”

Rafa was two steps ahead of you. He was pulling his Oaklandish hoodie over his head. Then he shook his head at you.

He bent his head to your breast as he lifted it roughly to meet his lips. He drew your hard bud between his lips and grazed it with his teeth. 

Rafa nipped and sucked your flesh roughly as he licked the fingers in his other hand and reached between your legs.

“Did you want Mike to touch your cunt like this?”

“No...only you Cash…”

He traced his fingers between your wet lips, causing you to shudder and moan. Then he started to tease your clit.

“Tell me what I want to hear. Tell me you love me.”

“I..I…” You didn’t know when it happened, but it did. “Fuck it. I love you Rafael.” 

You sigh in relief and with desire as he pushed his fingers deeper into you.

He moaned softly in your ear as he pressed you back against the island.

“Good girl. Now tell me more. Tell me you love what I’m doing to you right now. Tell me you love this shit.”

“I love it so fucking much,” you squeaked, holding on to his shoulders for dear life, your nails digging in.

As he pumped his fingers, you wriggled and started to grind against his hand. As you wriggled more, he cursed under his breath.

“Fuck! Stay still.”  

His tongue licked up and down your neck as his hand went faster and faster, playing you like an instrument.

You were getting so close, and Rafa could feel it. So he stopped and stepped back again, panting while he tasted his fingers and leaving you quivering and emotional.

You refused to beg, but he knew what you needed.

“I want to punish you for not listening to me and your heart, but I can't because I’d be punishing myself.”

He walked toward you again, put his hands on you and slid down your body as he knelt before you.

Rafa looking up at you like that made you fall in love all over again. 

He leaned forward and kissed your lower lips oh so tenderly. Then, he licked them, and you had to hold on to the counter again. Then he started talking.

“I’ve been hard for you ever since you texted me that you touched down.” 

He kissed each of your thighs and lifted one up and rested it on his shoulder. You were not ready.

“I was so pissed off all day. Until I saw you that night.”

Rafa lightly licked a long stripe between your legs.

He pulled back and looked at your pussy, as if entranced.

“But, I stayed away from you at the mixer because I knew I would drag you to a bathroom and bend you over the sink…”

Rafa slowly rolled his tongue over your slit. You held your hand over your mouth as you watched him.

He looked up at you and chuckled. 

“No close neighbors. Let me hear you.” 

He sighed as he looked at you again. 

“I wanted to take you in the bedroom at the suite during the press day and put your ankles around your ears to dig out that attitude.”  

Rafa licked you again, making you tremble and moan loudly.

“I decided to come and give you an ultimatum last night, but I get here and you were so cute and drunk and said that you loved me.”  

He graced you with a smile. You smile back and brush his hair out of his eyes.

“I know you said that I don’t own you. But you own me. Body and soul. I’m starving for you.”

And then he dove in, making you gasp as he eagerly parted your lips with his tongue and started to flick it back and forth over your clit, grasping your ass and your leg to support you and keep you in place.

This time he didn’t stop. He licked and sucked and swiped, his head moving back and forth as he ate. He did it until your eyes rolled back into your head and you were screaming his name. He increased his pace and intensity until you were a quivering, moaning mess. 

You come on Rafa’s face in the middle of a ski chalet in Park City, Utah.

You were still quivering as you watched him stand up, take off his shirt and wipe his face with it.

“So, you can take your flight back to LA in a couple of hours, or you can stay until Monday and we can be seen together tonight. In public.”

Your face lit up as he led you to the bathroom. You were catching on.

“And we will be ‘good friends’ for a few weeks until we let on.”

“Now, you’re listening.” Rafa was smiling wide now.

“Wait, does Diggs know about us?” Rafa started taking off his pants. You needed what was inside.

“Nevermind. I know the answer, Jackass.”  

You ignored Rafa’s laugh as you began to make up for lost time.

-------

Read the next part, Scene Stealer Tagging: 

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[hotchley]

Congrats on hitting 500! 🎉. Can you please do 2 from the fluff prompts for Rossi and the rest of the team?

Thank you! This is so bad because I do not write fluff well, but it was so funny (to me. Literally nobody else is going to laugh.) Umm... yeah. I wrote this in the car home. Ignore any errors, I didn't proofread.

Everyone is OOC. I had to do that to make it more fluff-like, just go with it.

2: what have you done to my kitchen?

Trigger Warnings: eating, food, food mentions, eating habits, birthday/birthday celebrations

read on ao3!

With hindsight, it probably wasn't the best idea the BAU had ever had.

At the time, it had been.

See, Rossi was always very concerned about the eating habits of the rest of the team. Which did make sense given that Reid was the best example. And that was because he ate three meals a day, everyday, at the same time. So the bar was below the ground.

He would bring in snacks, and then suddenly remember that his blood pressure meant he couldn't eat them, so Derek had to. He would accidentally make too much lunch, which would pull JJ away from her files. Apparently Hotch absolutely adored a certain food (he hated it) which always made Emily eat it. Aaron just took what he was given without complaining because Dave had far too much blackmail for him to risk his wrath.

So the team thought they could return the favour. Weekly cooking lessons- they weren't really lessons, a more accurate way of describing them would be Rossi's pretend cooking show the rest of the team watched- had become a tradition after the first one. They reached a point where Will, Beth, Savannah and the kids tagged along. Sometimes Alex and Kate would pop in, and they had a rota to dictate who would deliver to Ashley.

The first time Emily went had been an experience for everyone.

And even though they all knew that the many accidents involving Rossi's food were deliberate and always had been, they played along because it made him feel good, and it was a very lovely thing for him to do. He wasn't always good at showing his love the way it was needed, but with this, he always tried.

So as his birthday came closer and closer- although he kept denying it, not wanting it to become a big event- they decided how they were going to celebrate and show their appreciation for everything he had done at the same time. It was such an easy decision it was almost laughable.

They were going to cook for him. And not just a single meal. No, a feast, that the entire team, past and present, could enjoy. JJ and Morgan, as the most competent adults were making the mains, Emily and Spencer had been tasked with the sides because there was no way they could mess up a salad and Penelope and Hotch were sorting out desert.

It had been a perfect plan. Strauss was going to take Rossi out in the morning, and he would spend the day with her, Joy, and some of his other friends because apparently, he had those. Hotch would then turn up with Jack and take the spare key from wherever it was hidden- he wasn't allowed to say, and the rest of them would turn up after. By the time Rossi came home, everything would be ready. It might be a good time to place some emphasis on the had.

Aaron hadn't been able to find the key. Instead of waiting to see if someone else could get it, he'd thrown a rock through the window, climbed in and unlocked the door from inside. Unfortunately, Rossi's alarm was silent, so it was only the sirens came closer did he realise what was happening. And if that wasn't bad enough, Will was the cop they'd sent. He found it funny. Everyone whose name wasn't Aaron did.

He thought that would be the end of their problems. It was just a start.

His and Penelope's cake batter had gotten mixed up with one of the dishes JJ was making, which would've been fine, but they couldn't tell which one, so they'd both needed to start again.

And whilst that was happening, Derek had burnt his. Aaron had cursed Rossi for having an electric stove, which led to Jack politely asking what a "fudging mochafluffer" was. Emily told him what his dad had actually meant.

Emily had put a bowl in the microwave. She'd asked Aaron if it could go, and when he'd seen that it was just butter and chocolate- she was helping Penelope- he said yes, because he assumed she would've checked that it was a microwave proof bowl. She hadn't, and the bowl melted, leaving the microwave full of burnt chocolate and partially melted butter.

Spencer had somehow managed to avoid injuring himself, but that was all. He had been tasked with making salad. Vegetable salad. As in, a salad that contained vegetables. When Aaron went to help Emily determine whether a sauce was too hot- it was, by a large amount- he was covered in sprinkles. Jack's laughter identified him as the culprit.

Then, because of all the restarting and incidents and quantity of food they were making, they'd run out of dishes. After all, Dave was one person most days. Four, if Joy and her family came down. The most he ever had at one time was the team and family. Even then, only a few pots and pans were needed.

But because they were already running well behind schedule, they'd just tried to wash, dry and use alternative containers if they needed them urgently. With all six of them- and Jack- in the area, a few were dropped, and some didn't even clean in the dishwasher.

In short, the whole thing was a disaster. But as there was no clock in the kitchen, everyone assumed they still had time to salvage something. Anything, so Dave's birthday wasn't a disaster.

They didn't. Because as Aaron and Emily argued about why anyone would want to eat toasted lettuce- Emily's point was the lettuce had come straight from the fridge so putting it on the toaster would get it to room temperature, Aaron's was that he'd heard smarter things from Sergio- a key turned in the lock.

Erin walked in first, only realising what had been done in her absence when Dave walked through the door. He blinked. Then he rubbed his eyes. And then he pinched himself. When it became clear that he wasn't dreaming, he groaned.

"What have you done to my kitchen?"

And that was a good question. Every surface was covered in half-finished dishes, bowls, cutlery, food and other unidentifiable substances (Emily's cooking.) The six of them were a mess, their clothes completely ruined, and Aaron- who must have won the argument about lettuce- had some in his hair.

"Surprise?" Aaron said, completely deadpan.

"Dear me. Right, all of you, out. The spare bedroom has clothes for all of you. Get changed, and then we'll sort this out."

The team left, feeling terrible.

That feeling faded, because when they came back, Dave was eating one of their many not quite complete dishes. Straight from the bowl. But he seemed to like it! He actually liked it!

"We just wanted to do something nice for you," JJ said.

He shrugged. "I know. Erin kept checking her phone, so then I basically annoyed her into telling me. I know you've basically ruined my kitchen, but your intentions were good, and I appreciate the attempt. Truly. It was very sweet of you."

"Does this mean we get out of having to clear up?" Emily asked.

"No. We'll worry about that later. You must be starving, doing all of this since whenever it was."

"We started a bit later than planned," Penelope confessed.

"Oh I know. Very graceful dive Aaron. You do realise the spare keys are in the same place they've always been?"

Aaron frowns, then walks out, and reaches down somewhere the others can't see. When he comes back, his cheeks are flushed. "Oh."

"Indeed."

"Wait, you can't cook anything. It's your birthday!" Derek says.

"Whoever said anything about cooking?" Dave replies.

Right on cue, the doorbell goes. Dave takes the bag, giving the student on the other side a generous tip. He turns back, pizza in his arms. When he sees the shocked looks on everyone's faces, he shrugs.

"It's good."

Spencer laughs, and gets the extra paper plates out.

They sit in the living room, some of them on the couch, some of them on the floor, and Dave realises that despite everything- or maybe it's because of his broken window and messy kitchen- this has been the best birthday he's ever had.

It's a feeling only solidified when each member of the team takes one final slice of pizza without a single thought of anything other than enjoyment.

[rose-sunlight]

J&C’s RTA (or, for the boring people: Jake and Charles’ Road Trip Adventure)

Pairings: Implied Jake Peralta/Charles Boyle, Mentioned Jake Peralta/Amy Santiago, Jake Peralta/Original Male Character (OC)

Warnings: One mention of antisemitism, but it isn't graphic.

Summary: When Jake returns from being undercover, Charles realises how depressed he is over Amy's rejection. He decided the perfect remedy is a BFF Road trip. Little does he know, this Road Trip will bring some interesting revelations into the light.

A/n: This is for the @b99fandomevents​ Summer 2020 Fic Exchange written for @impossiblyizzy​! Hope you enjoy!

As soon as Jake returned to the precinct after being undercover, Charles began to plan this trip. He knew about Jake confessing his feelings to Amy (squeal), and how he was horribly rejected. When he returned, unchanged from his stint undercover, Charles vowed to take Jake on a road trip to end all road trips.

He even decided that Jake could dub their trip, hoping that would cheer him up. It did, and so they left on their summer J&C’s RTA—unknowing that what would happen could possibly change the course of their friendship forever.

Of course, Charles knew that they had to have an appropriate car to travel the way in, that’s why he chose a 1960’s panel van, like the one from Scooby-Doo. He thought Jake would look at it and smile; he did, but his smile disappeared almost instantly. Even when he climbed inside and looked around at all the snacks and chips Charles had bought (he had decided on the ones Jake likes, not the ones he liked that had a crunchy mealworm flavour. But Jake looked at them and smiled again, leaning against the window as Charles began to drive to their first location.

The music was blaring: Jake had insisted that Carly Rae-Jepsen and Taylor Swift be playing constantly at full volume. Charles had one hand outside the car, dragging it through the air, feeling the wind between his fingers as they flew past grand houses in the suburbs of New York at break-neck speed. Jake had his eyes closed against the rays of the sunlight coming through the windshield, a small smile tugging on his lips.

He was picturing Amy here with him, experiencing the beginnings of this elysian sunset.

“You know what you need?” Charles said, not taking his eyes off the road.

Jake shrugged, “A dartboard with Teddy’s dumb stupid face on it?”

“No,” Charles sighed, “You need to find someone else. Someone who will make you forget about Amy!”

Jake shook his head “I don’t know, Charles, I just can’t do that. Everyone would remind me of Amy.” He knew this was a lie, he could find someone who was the opposite of Amy and love them for the night, but it wouldn’t be the same, because all he would be able to think of would be how it wasn’t Amy holding him, kissing his neck…

“Well, I’m sure someone where we’re going will have a pair of lips for you.”

“In a weird way, thanks.”

They arrived at their first hotel stop the next day, after taking turns driving. It wasn’t much, but it was grand in its own way, with charming old windows and exposed brick. It was almost like a cottage, but with people and balconies watching you arrive. Charles slung his bag over his bag, slamming his car door shut as Jake did the same.

The receptionist was an older woman, scowling with tiny glasses on the bridge of her nose as Charles smiled and gave their room numbers. He’d decided, for privacy (a new concept for Charles, but one he was willing to learn for the sake of his heartbroken friend), that they would have separate rooms. He looked back from the scornful woman to Jake, who was frantically typing on his phone.

“Who’s that?” Charles asked as Jake shot up, eyes wide, like he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

“Oh, uh, no one, just…you know, Rosa…”

Charles raised an eyebrow “Oh, yeah, right, we both know Rosa doesn’t text you for that long,” His eyes comically widened in realisation, like the parent who had caught him with said hand in the cookie jar, “you’re texting Amy, aren’t you?”

“What? Charles, no, why would I?”

Before Charles could respond, the scowling woman passed over the two keys, suddenly breaking out into a fond smile that shook Charles slightly. He grabbed them and thanked her “You boys have fun; are you waiting on another couple?” She asked, holding back the other key.

Charles blushed, suddenly a bumbling mess “Uh, no, we-we’re not…uh…we’re not a couple…” He managed to blurt out, watching as the woman pushed her glasses up and smiled awkwardly.

“Oh, I’m sorry, here,” she replied, handing over the second key before gesturing to the stairs “your floor is the third, first two doors on the right, you can’t miss them.”

“Ok, great, thanks” Jake said, grabbing his bags and dragging Charles away from the woman, who he was still gaping at for assuming the two of them were a couple. They were halfway up the stairs when Jake turned back to Charles, who was still frowning as he walked.

“You know,” Jake started “I never imagined you to act so weird just because someone assumed you were with a dude”.

Charles shook his head again, furrowing his eyebrows as they finally got to their respective rooms “Oh, no, it wasn’t that I just realised that she looked like Julia Child! I have all her cookbooks, she looked just like her!”

“Oh, sorry.”

“It’s fine.”

There was a pause as they both stood in their hallways, staring at each other. The night was still hot and the stars that had just peaked out from the New York smog were shining through, creating an almost blue effect on Jake and Charles face. Jake had to stop; in this light, he noted how handsome his best friend truly was, but only in the way that his looks complimented his personality nicely.

Jake swallowed on air, Adam’s apple bobbing “I’m…going to go in. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Yeah,” Charles nodded, smiling a toothless grin “See you in the morning.”

They went into their separate rooms. Charles couldn’t sleep: he didn’t really understand why Jake got so offended about his supposed shock around being called a couple. He figured it was just a normal Jake move, standing up for whatever he felt was right. Maybe he felt a compassion to help those marginalised groups. After all, Jake had revealed to them the horrific things said about him in his youth when he wore the star of David around his neck.

Charles decided to sleep it off. Jake wasn’t doing much sleeping, and wasn’t planning on doing so until his casual fling was out of his room. He wanted them to stay, for that bit of closeness he really needed from anyone, but he decided that it was easier this way, for them to sneak out in the early hours of the morning.

Morning came, and the weather had ramped up again. It was a heavy heat that made it almost impossible to breathe, and Boyle was sure he would’ve died if it wasn’t for his sleep apnoea mask keeping him breathing. He almost slept in, like he was planning to, but housekeeping knocked (even though he had put ‘do-not-disturb’ on his door handle), and he found himself scurrying out of the room in shorts and a t-shirt.

Unfortunately—or, fortunately, for Jake, Boyle had stepped out of his room the exact time his fling of the night left, planting a big kiss on his lips, while Jake stood in the doorway of his room, dressed only in a pair of white boxers.

“Thanks for a great night.” The man, Jason, he had introduced himself as, said, walking straight past Boyle’s gobsmacked face. Although, it did make a lot of sense for Jake to like guys, when he thought about it. Jake stared back at Charles with a pale face, one arm outstretched.

“How much of that did you see?” He asked, not as concerned as Charles thought he would be, judging on the nice shade of translucent Jake had seemingly turned “I need to know so I can gauge how big my lie has to be”

Charles cut him off “Jake, you could’ve just told me.”

Jake’s shoulders slumped “I know. But…I don’t know, I’ve been keeping this a secret for so long, I was worried you’d be mad. No one knows, if that helps, not even Gina.”

“Knows what?”

Jake flushed red “You know what.”

Charles took a step forward, trying his best to be comforting to his embarrassed and half-naked friend. “I know, but…but it might help you if you say it out loud.”

He had a glint in his eye, and Charles could detect it as unwavering emotion and unshed tears from years of pent-up frustration. He wonders how many times Jake’s tried to tell the squad, how many times he’s tried to correct the pronouns of whoever he’d been on a date with the day before his shift. “N—” he let out a deep blowing breath, “No one else knows…that I’m Bisexual.”

Charles smiled proudly, reaching out to pull Jake into a hug. He didn’t cry, not even as Charles stroked his back comfortingly. He was just relieved that someone else knew. If it had to be anyone, he was glad it was Charles.

“If it helps…no one would judge you. Especially not me.” Charles gave a stern look, and Jake almost begged him silently to continue. “I’m Pansexual! I thought you knew, Jakey, I talk about my fat crush on Dave from HR all the time!”

If Jake was in a cartoon, his eyes would be like saucers right about now. “I thought you meant in…like, a bro way!”

“There is no way me talking about all the explicit things I’d let him do could possibly be in a bro way.” Charles deadpanned as Jake let out a breathy laugh.

“Cool.” Jake said, smiling at his friend as if their eyes had just met for the first time in their friendship. He sits down on the motel fire escape, and Charles joins him, knees brushing against each other “So how does being Pan work?”

Charles sighed “A lot of people say a lot of different things. For me…I’m attracted to the soul of someone before their body. I don’t care about gender, as long as they’re kind and intellectually sexy.” He was staring straight at Jake now (no pun intended).

“We’re super dumb.” Jake groaned.

“Yep.”

“Are our gay-dars that broken that we’ve been friends for what? Five years? And neither of us knew the other was LGBTQIA?”

Charles let out a large giggle, smiling at Jake, nudging him slightly “One hell of a road-trip, right?”

“Yeah,” Jake smiled back, “And it’s only just started.”

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[albapuella]

How to Lose a Lover in 10 Days or Less: A Comprehensive Guide to Becoming a Future Romantic Failure (Chapter One)

AO3

Fandom: Homestuck

Summary: How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days AU Dave needs to win a bet; Karkat needs to write an article. Shenanigans ensue.

Tags: Humanstuck, alternate universe - no sburb session, POV switches galore, implied/referenced child abuse Author’s note: This story is the result of a jam session I did with aceAdoxography on the davekat thirst federation discord server. This one's a little out of my usual wheelhouse, but I hope you will enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. New chapters every Saturday/Sunday.

I also tried to be fancy with the html, but it didn't come out right (you will see what I mean). However, I'm leaving it as is for now.

Chapter 1: Inciting Incidents 

Day 0:

“I'm smooth as peanut butter,” Dave protested, his coffee sloshing in its cup as he swung his arm out. “Choosy moms might choose Jiff, but I ain't in the market for an older woman at the moment. Just call me Skippy, because that's how smooth I am.”

Rose looked both unimpressed and unconvinced. “Really?” She took a small, dignified sip of her tea.

“Yes!” Dave frowned. “I'm like super suave. Fucking James Bond over here.”

She squinted at him for a moment. “You do realize that James Bond is characterized by his inability to keep any woman with him longer than the length of one of his movies.”

“That's only because he's too much man to be tied down,” Dave said. “And that's not even the point: the point is that the fucker's suave. He can have any girl he wants.”

“And I suppose you can get any boy you want?” It sounded dismissive. “It would be wonderful if you managed that feat before my wedding. You know how mother worries about you, and I would rather not spend the first day wedded to my wife listening to mother wailing about how her poor little Davey's going to be all alone in the world.”

Dave felt the flush creeping up his cheeks, and he wasn't sure if he was experiencing his future humiliation already or if he was getting mad. Just because he couldn't keep a relationship going for long, that didn't mean he wasn't smooth. It wasn't his fault that up until very recently he'd only pursued girls because he hadn't wanted to admit he was gay... Okay, yes, that actually was his fault. The point was of course those relationships had failed. His relationship prowess had never been given a fighting chance. “Yeah, I could. In fact, I could make any of the guys here fall for me.”

“Very well, brother of mine,” Rose said, smiling that particular smile which tended to portend bad things for the person it was directed at, “how about that one?” She pointed to a man sitting alone at a table on the other end of the cafe.

Dave looked over at him without making it obvious he was doing so. Damn, Rose. The guy was a snack, obviously, but his expression indicated that the whole world had pissed in his cornflakes one at a time and had made him miss the bus to his job at the blow job factory. Still, it was too late to back out now. “Fine,” he said, setting down his cup just a little too hard. “I'll see you in two weeks, Rose, and I'll have him on my arm in a matching tux. We're going to be the hottest, gayest penguins you've ever fucking seen.”

She laughed at him. Which was fine: he was going to have the last laugh here. And there was no time like the present. He stood and strode over to the other table, curving his mouth in his smoothest, suavest fucking smile.

The man had noticed Dave's approach and looked up from his coffee, the ire on his face now joined by confusion. “Can I help you?” His voice was rough but not unpleasant. His tone was less pleasant, but Dave had expected that from his expression.

“I sure hope so,” Dave said. He put one hand on his hip and held the other out to the man. “I've just lost my name: can I have yours?”

The man blinked. Then he laughed—less amused and more disbelieving. “Seriously? You're seriously going to open up with that? That has to be the cheesiest fucking pick up line I've heard in my life. And I've heard a lot of them.”

Dave only grinned. Breaking the ice was just one of Dave's many talents. “What can I say, dude, I'm a connoisseur of fine cheese. Premium, aged in wooden crocks or whatever.” He waggled his hand. “Don't leave me hanging.”

The man looked from Dave's hand to his face and back again before heaving a sigh. He shook Dave's hand, his grip solid but not crushing. “Karkat.” Then he frowned. “What do you want?”

“Thought that was obvious, Karkat,” Dave said, trying the name out. He liked it. “I want to ask you out. On a date. I'm Dave, by the way,” he added quickly. It probably would have been smarter to open up with that. It also occurred to Dave that there were a lot of other variables he hadn't considered until this moment. “If you're single. God, I hope you're single. And into guys. Otherwise, I'm going to feel pretty stupid.”

Karkat opened his mouth but didn't speak as something too quick for Dave to pick up flashed across his face. Then he grinned, perhaps a little too widely. “You're in luck,” he said. “I am in the market for a date.”

Oh. “Cool. Cool, that's—” Dave broke off with a fake cough into his fist. “Yeah, uh. So, are you free tomorrow? Night?”

A slow nod. “Yeah. Sure. Sounds great.” He dug through his bag and took out a small notepad. “Do you use Pesterchum?” he asked as he scribbled something down.

“I think everyone and their grandmother uses Pesterchum,” Dave said, still kind of surprised that this was going as well as it was. “Not my grandmother, I don't have one, but you know, grandmothers. Or the tech savvy ones anyway. I think your average grandmother might have some trouble—the text is kind of tiny, isn't it?”

Karkat looked up from his writing. “Right.” He ripped the page out and held it out to Dave. “Message me, and we can set up that date.”

Dave took the paper. “Thanks, I'll, uh, message you soon!” Without waiting for a response, he turned on his heel and made his way back to Rose. He knew his face was burning, but he decided to believe it was the flush of victory rather than anything else. She was still smiling at him, and he held the paper out in front of her face. “See? I've already got his chumhandle. You're going to eat your words, Rose. I hope you like the taste of humble pie.”

Rose laughed behind her hand. “Nice work, Dave,” she said once she'd recovered. “Try not to break his heart, won’t you?”

“What?” Dave shook his head. “His heart is going to be wrapped in three layers of bubble wrap and under ten pounds of packing peanuts.” He shoved the paper into his pocket. “I got this thing on lock.”

---

Karkat tore his eyes away from the retreating Dave to jot down some notes on his notepad. Looked like he'd be able to write this article sooner rather than later. Unless Dave had been dared to come over and get his phone number. That had happened before. He scowled into his coffee. Well, if Dave never got in touch with him, then he'd just use his last disaster of a relationship to base his article on. That was what he'd planned to do originally anyway.

It wasn't a secret around the office that Karkat Vantas, despite being a font of romance wisdom, was dead in the water when it came to dating and keeping a boyfriend. He attributed this mostly to his abhorrent personality and lack of self-control. Whenever the opportunity came up for him to stick his foot in his mouth, you could find him there, furiously chewing on his toes. He'd lost count of how many times a date had ended because he'd said something he shouldn't have. Or rather, screamed something he shouldn't have at the top of his lungs with more profanity than was warranted in retrospect.

So, of course, the boss knew about Karkat's lackluster love life, too. The assignment had been one of her little jokes. One of her little mind games. “Oh, Mr. Vantas, please write an article about how to fuck up a relationship in less than two weeks—it should be easy for you seeing as you're such an expert at being so noxious that no one but your handful of friends can even stand to be anywhere around you, never mind a stranger who doesn't know your history or has any reason to want to stick around and deal with your bullshit.” Paraphrased, of course. Her version had been much less honest.

He re-read his notes.

* Dave, no last name given. Terrible pick up line. Rambles. Idiot or awkward. Or both. Dresses like a color-blind douche bag. Obnoxious sunglasses. Vision impaired? Hot. Attractive. Moderately attractive.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he set down his notepad to fish it out. He frowned down at the screen. A notification from Pesterchum? His heart rose a little despite himself until he saw the name. Kanaya. He sighed. While he was happy she was happy, he couldn't handle being gushed at right now. He put the phone on the table and finished his coffee.

---

Dave dithered for hours before he finally decided on the perfect message to open communications with.

TG: this is dave from the cafe TG: wanted to say hey TG: and ask what you want to do Saturday

Okay, so it wasn't the best rap ever, but he was stretched for material here. Also, it probably wasn't a good idea to blow up this guy's phone before Dave got some confirmation that this was even Karkat's chumhandle. It wouldn't be the first time someone had given him a dud. At least the messages were going through: that was a good sign.

CG: ARE YOU RHYMING ON PURPOSE? TG: hell yea dog TG: mc strider here by popular demand to lay down the jams TG: ive got all my adoring fans just waiting for me to shower them with stanz- TG: -as like youve never seen its a dream come true straight to you

That was enough; he had to give Karkat some time to respond. Assuming this was Karkat.

TG: this is karkat right? CG: OH I CAN TALK NOW? CG: YES THIS IS KARKAT. CG: AS CHARMING AS THIS IS (AND I AM SO UTTERLY CHARMED RIGHT NOW), DO YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO GO ON A DATE WITH ME? TG: totally i totally do i knew as soon as i saw you yea im taking this total snack on a date

Which was not a lie, technically. Yes, Dave liked how Karkat looked, but he probably wouldn't have gone over to his table without Rose egging him on.

TG: where do you want to go skys the limit TG: but not really TG: cause no offense but i just met you TG: and i dont think were at the stage where id be willing to sell one my kidneys TG: to make your dreams of jumping out of an airplane onto the back of a narwhal or some shit like that come true TG: thats like after at least date number 5 and id expect some kind of thanks TG: at least a tongue kiss or something TG: not that i think you need to pay for dates physically TG: thats all kinds of gross TG: forget i said any of that please CG: … CG: HOW ABOUT DINNER AND A MOVIE. LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE. CAN WE DO THAT?

Dave grinned with relief. He'd thought for sure he'd just blown this.

TG: sounds great nothing beats the classics

With that sorted out, the rest had been easy. Dave closed his phone, feeling accomplished. He was really doing this. He was really making this happen. But first, he had some clothes to throw in the shower!

---

Karkat slid his phone back into his pocket with a sigh. Well, now he had a date for tomorrow. He looked down at the new set of notes he'd written during that 'conversation'.

* Last name Strider? Raps without provocation. Definitely visually impaired. Goes off on wild tangents. I'm going to be murdered. What the hell am I doing?

It had been difficult not to react in his normal way to the frankly bizarre things Dave had said, and he knew that was only going to be more difficult to manage in person. Still, he had to 'hook' this man as best as he was able before he could fuck it up like always. After all, he couldn't 'lose' a guy he never 'had', right? He idly entertained the thought of what 'having' Dave might be like. He was clearly crazy, but there was something endearing in his total inability to communicate like a regular person. The way he'd been so obviously nervous and out of his depth when he'd come over to ask Karkat out. The way his cheeks had flushed when Karkat had accepted. The way his body had moved when he'd walked away.

Shaking his head, Karkat tucked the notepad into his bag. No point in even thinking about it. Even if he weren't getting into this just to ruin the relationship for his article, the end would have been the same anyway. Honestly, he was doing Dave a favor: at least this way, Dave would only be wasting ten days worth of his time rather than torturous months of dealing with Karkat's bullshit before finding an excuse to cut him loose.

[another-sonic-blog]

First Impressions Pt.2

First Impressions

Pt.2

ShadamyBoom!

Just like promised, Shadow and Amy meet more constantly. And by constantly, I mean four to five days a week. Amy will talk about the constant battles with Eggman and Shadow would always listen carefully even if he knew the ending for each story. With “Team Sonic” always kicking Eggman’s butt.Shadow will always keep Amy updated about his costant search for the Chaos Emeralds and Lyric’s possible uprising. Before leaving to search for an Emerald, he made sure to tell Amy which made her respond with a “I’ll wait for you.”

Times has passed since Amy last saw Shadow and she has began to worry. She was honestly enjoying her time with the black hedgehog and didn’t want him to stop coming to see her. Amy didn’t even know where he was living, so she couldn’t go investigate in case Shadow was in trouble and needed help. The only thing she could do was to trust him and pretend like nothing was hapening in front of her friends, which were currectly eating all together at Meh Burger

“It’s already been a week”-Amy thought out-loud. Looking down at her burger, she began to think about the possibilities that might have happen to Shadow, but once again, she knew he could take care of himself.

“A week for what Ames?- Sonic asked curious about what the pink hedgehog could be thinking.

“You have been kinda out Amy”- Tails asked as welll as he took a bite out of his burger.

“Uh? No, its nothing!- Amy said and took a sip of her soda rapidly.

“Come on Amy! What is it? Did you forget to water your plants for a week? Did you forget to wash your clothes for a week? Because that has happen to me and-”- Sticks began but was interrupted by Knuckles.

“No guys, Amy is just worried that her boyfriend hasn’t come to visit her for a week!”- That was said and while Amy was choking on her on soda, everyone went to stare at her with a surprise look.

“What? eh? Boyfriend, Amy you have a boyfriend?, its not like I care or anything but-”-Sonic began to blabber at super sonic speed.

“What? No, I don’t have a boyfriend, I-”

“ Don’t be shy Amy! I have heard you guys talking couple of times!”- Knuckles said.

“What? How?”-Amy asked almost yelling.

“ I sometimes pass by your house because I do weight lifting near there, and I have heard you talk to someone regurlarly, I didn’t really make out who he was, but since it’s your bussiness, I didn’t pay to much importance.”-Knuckles explained, while calmly eating his burger.

“Wow, Knuckles, I never saw you as the one to take people’s privacy into consideration.”- Tail said surprised.

“There’s a whole history you don’t know about me bruh”

“Anyways Amy, who is this guy?, is he rich? does he own a technological corporation in which they have world domination as their main goal?!”

“He is not my boyfriend!”- Amy yelled, blushing really hard.

“Then who the heck is he?”- Sonic asked, a bit angry at the fact and forgetting about his chilli dog. Knuckles out of nowhere took out some pop-corn, already feeling where this was going, in which Tails and Sticks decided to join him and just sit back, relax and enjoy the upcoming drama.

“He, uh, he is…My student!”-Amy said quickly already sweating and not really thinking about the consequences.

“You have to stay quiet… if not I’ll kick you out”- Dave came out of nowhere and and just like he came with his “I don’t care attitude” he left. 

“Your student? Student of what?”-Sonic kept throwing her questions, not really caring about Dave’s warning.

“ah..Indoors design?… yeah that, hehe!”-Amy said with a nervous laugh. 

“Oh look at the time, I have to go now, bye~.” - And with that, Amy left in a rush.

“Wait, AMY!!!”-Sonic yelled.

“Ok this is it.”- Dave said to himself, a he push down the emergency bottom in which was under his counter, making everyone been ejected  from their seats and went flying over to an unknown place.

Amy came to her house, while trying to catch her breath she went to her fridge to get a sip of water. 

“Well, that was close”-Amy thought. And as she pull her head out of the fridge and close the door, she found no other than Shadow The Hedgehog behind the door looking at her.

“Shadow!”- Amy was surprised by his sudden apperance.

“It seems like I have come in a bad time.”- Shadow said and Amy was perplexed.

“It doesn’t smell like cookies.”- Shadow decided to look to the other side while saying this.

“Oh, Shadow!”-Amy was so happy to hear him and she hugged him, forgetting about her previous situation. She was just happy to know that Shadow made it back safely.

After a few seconds, she remember who she was hugging and she guessed it was time to go into the next level with her friendship with Shadow. Hugging a friend wasn’t wrong after all. She looked up to see his reaction, and he just had a surprised look on face. 

“hehe…heheheh”- Amy giggle as she separated from Shadow and turn around to get the ingredients to make cookies.

“What are you laughing about Rose?”- Shadow asked as he eyes followed Amy.

“Nothing, just your expression.. I have to say it was kinda cute”

“Tsk”

“Well, I won’t do it if you don’t want me too”- Amy said smiling, if Shadow didn’t want to be hugged, then she had nothing else to do but to respect his decision.

“…”

Amy felt Shadow’s gaze towards her, at every movement she did while preparing her things to make the cookies. That’s when she thought…

“hey, Shadow. Do you want to learn how to bake this?”

“Why would I do that?, I have you to make them for me. And besides, If I learn how to make them on my own, I wouldn’t have an excuse to come see you.”

“Well, I won’t be here forever, you know? and…I actually, well.. thought that you liked to come here not only because of my cookies, but because you, like me?”

Amy noticed Shadow’s change, his eyes opened a bit more and he seem to confuse the word “like.”

“In a non- romantic, comrade type of way!”- Amy quickly turned around to cut the cookie dough and kept Shadow from looking at her blush.

“Very well then, let’s began…”- Shadow came closer to Amy, ready to get his first lesson.

“But Amy…”- Amy turned her head to Shadow as she hear him call her name.

“Please, don’t remind me again that in a future you won’t be here.”

The lesson went smoothly after that. Amy felt bad for remembering Shadow about his immortality. So she try to make her lesson more fun for the both of them to enjoy. Shadow seemed to have had a good time as he learn to make cookies and in between recipes he took more bites of the different kind of doughs, which made him be in a better mood.

“Well, all done!”- Amy said happily and with pride, the tray was full of different kind of cookies.

“Rose… they are all burnt”

“Yeah, but you made it yourself, its a beginning! You should be proud!”- Amy sightly punch him in the shoulder in which Shadow pretend to be hurt and touched his shoulder as in to gain a bit of pity from Amy so she could let him eat part of her cookies.

They sat down in the sofa and with milk began to eat the cookies.

“They taste great Shadow! The burn part makes it have a different flavor.”- Shadow knew Amy was lying as he had tried his own cookies, but smirked at the nice thing the pink hedgehog said. They continued eating and watching a reality show in the TV until Shadow interrupted.

“Hey Rose, look at what I found”- Shadow said pulling out a green Chaos Emerald.

“Oh, you did find it after all!”

“Yeah, I had to fight some robots, but it wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle”

“Are you going to look for the other ones?”

“Yes, but since I already have one, it means that I must leave for sometime”

“What do you mean?”- Amy asked putting down her cookie and milk.

“With the previous battle I had, I am sure that Lyric is back… some of the robots I fought were under their command. Some of those robots were Eggman’s  prototypes… they know I have the Chaos Emerald, If I stay here I’ll put everyone in danger.”- Shadow said, looking straight at Amy’s eyes.

“But-but where would you be?”- Amy was really worry, she didn’t like the idea of having to wait for Shadow to come back, wondering if he was safe or not.

“To be honest, I don’t know, I’ll hide and plan my next move as I go. I need to get all the Chaos Emeralds, that way I can stop whatever plan Lyric has.”

“Then, I’ll go with you!”

“It’s dangerous, Rose”

“I can take care of myself”

“I know that but…”

“And besides, I don’t want to put anyone in danger either”

“What?”

Amy went to her room, and looked through her things. Meanwhile, Shadow wonder what in Chaos was Amy meaning by “ I don’t want to hurt anyone either”. When Amy came back, Shadow understood her words.

“A Chaos Emerald?!”- Shadow said surprised as Amy showed him a red Chaos Emerald.

“Where did you find it?”

“I believe this was the emerald you were trying to look for in the forest a few weeks ago, when you were injured.”

“So that’s why you were in the forest that night? You can also sense Chaos energy?”

“Only when I am really close to them. In reality, I was trying to find some berries for a cooking recipe when I sensed the energy, I looked futher into the forest and I found it. And I also found you not too far away from it.”- Amy said as she took a sit in the sofa close to Shadow.

“Amy, you can still give it to me and I’ll-”- Shadow began but she interrupted him.

“No, I found it. And I am resposible for it now. Please Shadow, let me go with you.”

Shadow thought for a moment, and he couldn’t just take the emerald from Amy and leave. Amy wouldn’t forgive him and he knew that.

“Fine”- Shadow finally agreed, not really sure about his decision.

“Yes! When are we leaving?”- Amy said, glad that Shadow accepted her request.

“Tomorrow morning”

“Well then, you should stay here the night”

“I accept”

“Great, I’ll make us some snacks for the trip”- Amy said as she stood up and went to the kitchen.

“oh and Amy…”- Shadow began and Amy turned around, there weren’t many times that Shadow called her by her name, she knew it has serious business when he did.

“Yes?”

“I like your cookies, but I also like you”

“M-me?”

“In a totally non-romantic, comrade type of way”

A/N: if there’s enough support I’ll continue, I must say that real romance begans after this chapter~~~

[waterkick15-blog]

Alison Brie Keeps Two Jars of Almond Butter in Her Fridge at All Times

Alison Brie has played a range of popular characters on television and the big screen — a Stepford-y, scorned wife on Mad Men, a type-A student on Community, a “misunderstood intellectual” on BoJack Horseman — but in Netflix’s Glow, she shines as a dogged actress willing to slum it on Doritos and other vending-machine fare in order to make it on the small screen. Brie’s character in the ’80s-era series about a low-budget television show about an all-women wrestling league, Ruth Wilder, pounds sodas and munches on Twizzlers alongside her team in order to stay high energy for each match. The salty snacks also offer solace: At the end of the season, Brie’s character is comforted by a pile of colorful candy unloaded onto her hospital bed by her friends.

But the Los Angeles-based actress isn’t all that into junk food personally. She says she grew up on In-N-Out but doesn’t “really eat fast food anymore.” An avid cook, Brie says she and her husband, actor Dave Franco, plan vacations around food, researching restaurants and making reservations ahead of time, like they did for a recent trip to Nashville. Though she was in New York City primarily for work earlier this month, Brie made time to visit a few of her favorite spots. Eater caught up with the star to talk about food, drink, snacks — and why she keeps two jars of almond butter in her fridge at all times.

Eater: Well, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’d like to introduce you to the Famous Original Eater Questionnaire. Are you game? Alison Brie: [laughs] Absolutely.

What was the last thing you ate? These sad raw cashews. [Brie holds a few up in her hand while frowning.] The thing is, this is not a good day for me to talk about food, because I’ve been running around all day and it makes me sound like I don’t love to eat — but I do! I was planning on going to Two Hands in Tribeca for one of their bowls for lunch, but I didn’t have time.

What’s the last thing you drank? A green tea. I’m a big tea drinker. I don’t drink coffee really, but I’ll do a green tea like a sencha or a jasmine if they’re not fucking with the white oolong. I love oolong though.

When’s the last time you had a hot dog? Oh, I don’t eat them because I don’t eat pork and I don’t eat red meat… but you know, at the airport before coming to New York, in the American Airlines lounge, I had a turkey apple sausage. That sort of counts, right?

Absolutely yes, that counts. Although it was kind of smashed. It looked kind of disgusting, but then it tasted amazing.

If you could eat something right this second, what would you want to eat? I would want to eat one of those balls from Lilia... those cacio e pepe balls… It’s like an arancini? It is maybe my favorite thing in the world. We just got back from Italy and I was like, I want Lilia. Dave and I are real foodies. Anywhere we go, we plan our trips around restaurants.

Do you have a favorite but strange food combination? Do I? Every day I eat an apple and almond butter for breakfast, so that’s like my go-to food combination, but I don’t think that’s very unusual… I’m trying to think. I don’t know. I’m searching, searching the bank. [Brie spreads her fingers and waves her hands as if in front of an imaginary crystal ball.] Oh! Speaking of that turkey sausage, which I hardly ever eat, but when I do eat sausage, I like to dip it in honey, which might be a slightly strange food combination.

Maybe, but it sounds good. It’s very good. But I always feel like people are going to judge it. So even when I ordered that sausage, I ordered a green tea on the side with honey. So people would think: Oh, that’s not weird, she ordered honey with the tea. And then I tried to cover my plate with a napkin while I dipped the sausage in honey. I didn’t want the chef to be offended — the airport lounge chef — to be offended that I had used honey on his turkey sausage.

But you’re clearly ahead of everyone, because how many people glaze their turkey with honey? Exactly! It’s the best. Well, think of honey glazed ham... I feel like maple bacon and stuff like that is a big thing, the sweet with savory?

Fully agree. Okay, what is a food item that you didn’t try until later in life? Okra. You know, I grew up in Los Angeles, so it’s not like people were hot on okra. I maybe didn’t even know what it was until I heard that Tom Colicchio hated it so much on Top Chef. And I quite like it… a lot of people do it really well these days.

Anything you’ve never eaten that you wish you could try? Any curiosities? No. Well, again, searching, searching. It’s strange because I feel like I’m a pretty adventurous eater but I haven’t eaten red meat or pork now in probably over 10 years. So every once in a while if we’re at a restaurant and there’s some new amazing dish that is meat-based or things that have bacon on them, I’m kind of like, should I do it? And my husband dissuades me because he thinks that I might get sick. He has a real logical way of thinking about it.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had really amazing prosciutto because I stopped eating meat before I was making good money and hanging out with fancy people.”

That’s good that he’s concerned for your well-being. Yeah. But then maybe it’s just a tactic for him to enjoy all of that dish himself? I’m like, “This prosciutto looks so amazing.” And he’s just like, “No, you probably shouldn’t have any of this because you’ll probably get sick.” Actually, to be honest, I don’t think I’ve ever had really amazing prosciutto because I stopped eating meat before I was making good money and hanging out with fancy people. Like in college, no one was eating amazing prosciutto. I was eating In-N-Out. I wasted all my meat eating on fast food.

What’s your go-to drink? A gin and tonic.

Do you have an album you like turning on when you’re hosting a dinner party? I pretty much go to the Alabama Shakes for stuff like that, both of their albums. Sound and Color is great and I forget what the other album is called. But they’re both pretty good. Some of the songs get a little loud but it’s such a cool hybrid. It’s almost kind of jazzy, and it’s also kind of soulful. It’s also kind of rock and roll. I feel like it’s a real crowd pleaser.

You mentioned In-N-Out earlier. Is that your favorite chain restaurant still, or do you have one? It’s not my favorite chain still, I don’t think, because I don’t eat burgers. When I go there, their fries are great. Do I have a favorite chain restaurant? Chain restaurant... no. Although, there is a Shake Shack across from my gym, which always seems really amazing because smells just waft in.

What’s your Proust’s madeleine? Is there a food you eat that immediately takes you back? I’m trying to think of my mom’s go-to’s. You know, like noodle kugel. I’m Jewish, so that’s something that my mom has made my whole life. That’s a good one. It’s comforting. And you’ve always got to eat it. If I’m anywhere and they’ve got a kugel, I’m like “Oh, yeah.” And if my mom has made her kugel, it’s great — super buttery, creamy.

I love that. Is there a food secret you think more people should know? Let’s see. Well, I love to cook, and almond butter is actually a great thing to have around... I’ve been doing a lot of sauces with soy — well, I substitute all my soy for tamari — with a little bit of almond butter, put in a little Sriracha, put in a little lime, a little honey. And that’s my go-to sauce right now.

For noodles, right? For noodles, for any type of bowl, like you’re making a rice bowl, you can even put it over salmon. It’s sort of more of a vegan-y hack for a hearty sauce and bowl.

What’s in your fridge right now? Definitely apples and almond butter, and truly I stock up because my husband and I both eat it and we have to have our own jar of almond butter. We like to eat it straight from the jar. Whole Foods brand. Crunchy, unsalted. Also in the fridge: There’s going to be kombucha. There’s going to be sparkling water, it’s going to be like Perrier. There’s going to be old brown rice from Thai food takeout that I think I’m going to repurpose for a meal but haven’t done that yet. There’s going to be an old red onion. I use a ton of red onion when I cook, but I feel like then there’s always like half a rotten red onion that didn’t get used in the background. There’s a ton of, oh this is not a food thing, but I keep all my face masks in the fridge.

That’s an amazing tip. I like to keep those things cold. What else is in there? I’m truly trying to picture the landscape of our fridge. Usually a rotisserie chicken. You know what? That actually is my main hack for cooking. When I want to make anything and I just feel like I don’t have the energy to do the whole meat side of it, I pick up a rotisserie chicken from the market and then make the rest of the meal all gourmet from scratch. And then you just shred up that chicken and you toss it in, and you seem like the best cook ever.

This interview was edited and condensed for clarity.

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Source: https://www.eater.com/2018/10/19/17965732/alison-brie-eater-questionnaire-favorite-foods

[rebeebit]

Chutes & Ladders: the Selkirk Mountain Experience

Last year, our friends Carrie and Dave abandoned the worst ski season in Colorado for whiter pastures in our Neighbor to the North. They came back with tales of amazing powder skiing, eye-popping terrain, and a very intense ski guide and his family who live for most of the year in a helicopter-accessed chalet at the foot of the Durrand Glacier in the Selkirk Mountains of British Columbia. They had a blast, but were thinking how much more fun it would be to have a crew of friends with them to enjoy the trip. Andy and I were lucky enough to be included among the invitees. So, on February 9, 2019, we assembled in the lobby of the Best Western in Revelstoke, Canada to begin our week of backcountry touring.

Below, you can see us  at the top of the Ruth Glacier, one of the hair-ball descents of the trip (read on...). Ruedi, our guide, is at left. In no particular order, we are Joe, Tryg, Heather, Peter, Carrie, Dave, Andy, Me, Erica, Bo, and our tail guide Nicole. Ruedi’s daughter and co-guide Florina took the photo.

The day-to-day of this trip was as follows: get up at 6 AM, pack yourself a sandwich and snacks for the day’s tour. Pack your ski pack and put on your ski clothes. At 7 AM, eat a monster breakfast: usually oatmeal AND eggs AND toast, and excellent Mokka-style coffee. At this point, you’ve gotten the directive regarding whether it’s skins on or off, and if you are not ready to leave by 8 AM you will be left behind. Ruedi, who established Selkirk Mountain Experience in 1985, is Swiss, and everything runs like a Swiss watch. On time, efficient, and exactly how he wants it. Then we set off for the day’s adventure of touring and fantastic skiing in the huge and wild Selkirks. We returned to the chalet each day by 3 PM (except for the two nights of hut-to-hut skiing, more on that later), where Chef Tommy had happy hour snacks ready for us. After some snacks, it was time for a sweat in the sauna and a shower. Dinner was the only event that didn’t occur at a precise time - but was usually around 6:15 - 6:30. Dinner was a gourmet affair: soup, salad, main course, and dessert. After dinner, we tried to rally and socialize, but usually didn’t make it much later than 8 or 8:30 before we all disappeared to our rooms to do it again the next day.

Ruedi & Florina, his daughter, were with us for the whole trip!

Dave, making lunch for the day’s tour.

The wacky Canadians, Jake and Gavin, convinced me to do a couple of snow rolls after sweating in the sauna. It was surprisingly refreshing!

I have only one other experience with guided skiing, but I think ski guides do try to push you to the comfortable edge of your limits. I certainly thank Jim and Peter in Japan for dragging me up Kurodake, where the butterflies in my stomach nearly had me vomit, but I had the best ski run of my life (at that point). Ruedi was no exception. After our first lovely full day of skiing, in which his powder-hound nose took us to the few closely-accessible powder stashes, he had made a decision about what our group was capable of. I would find out later that his idea of his client’s edge is a little different from mine!

One of the descents from day one. Fun! If you look carefully, you can see our tracks coming from the saddle to the right of the peak at left.

We received the pronouncement after Sunday dinner that our group would be embarking on a two night, three day hut-to-hut trip. Over the years, Ruedi has built two outlying huts on his land lease from the Canadian government: the Moloch (1988) and Empire Lakes (2014) huts. We were to assemble our gear for overnight (silk liner bags and headlamps, and a package of perishable food for dinners) and be ready to go in the morning.

The morning of our departure was a balmy -20 Celsius. A polar front had settled over BC, so we had all been skiing in every layer we brought - we were already a ripe-smelling crew by day 3. Our tour took us up the Durrand Glacier and to the top of Hidden Peak for a warm-up lap. I was heartened by the mellow skiing: the day before had provided some acrophobic thrills at the top of Tumbledown Mountain and a couple of steep ski pitches, so I thought perhaps our hut tour would be more relaxed. How wrong I was. At the bottom of Hidden Peak, we put skins back on for an easy tour to the top of Ruth Glacier. After a photo op, Ruedi gave us a directive for skiing the next line:

“You can ski right or left of my track. But when I make the traverse, do not short-cut in or out of it, because there is a crevasse.”

He drew a little picture in the snow to elaborate on where, exactly, we could die if we didn’t follow his directions.

I did not feel like the glacier was easy skiing, regardless of certain death awaiting me if I didn’t follow his instructions. It was quite steep (at least 40 degrees), and the snow was DEEP. With my heavy pack, I managed to bungle it pretty well, but only took two tele-barrel rolls. However, the group all made it down, and we traversed above some cliffs to the base of the Angel’s Crest. From here, Ruedi put in a series of kick turns up the steep slope. Just as I was thinking I didn’t need to have ALL the fun in one day and was wishing I was at the hut, we topped out. The turns down were absolutely worth it. See below.

This was fantastic skiing - 30 perfect turns on a consistent not-too-steep pitch. Ladies skied on looker’s right. The boys on the left made a big ol’ mess.

Of course, you don’t get anything for free, so the exit from this amazing ski involved a side step down a 45 degree couloir. 

No pictures of the actual couloir (I was a little busy), but Andy snapped the picture above of some of our group coming out. I was so grateful for the presence of women on this trip, and for Ruedi’s daughter Florina as one of our guides. It definitely takes a lot for me to face up to my fear of heights and scary things in general, and it was so helpful to have Carrie, Heather, and Erica to lean on when I got scared. Also, Florina was amazingly encouraging about everything - she was a great foil to her dad!

We were rewarded for the final slog up the Dismal Glacier (it’s really named that) to Moloch Hut with a fine dinner of risotto! Below you can see Ruedi, cooking away.

At breakfast the next morning, Ruedi wasn’t sure about the prospect of good skiing on the tour to the next hut, so he asked if we wanted to see the ice cave. Since the cave provided a brief respite from the frigid temps, we all agreed enthusiastically to the brief side trip. The cave is, unfortunately, forming due to climate change, but was a fascinating diversion.

We left the cave and set out across the top of the Dismal Glacier. The direction we were heading was straight into a rocky headwall, but to our left was a gentle slope. I was skiing right behind Ruedi, so I asked optimistically if we would be heading left.

“No. We go there.” Points straight ahead with ski pole.

I comforted myself once more with my friend Matt’s expression that “the trail always finds a way,” and surely there was a sneaky way to skin to the top of the cliffs I saw in the distance. Well, that thought at least quelled the butterflies for the half a mile it took to get to the cliffs. As we approached, I saw ladders attached to the rock. You read that correctly - LADDERS. Having spent two weeks in the Dolomites last summer, my heart sank. I knew exactly where Ruedi was taking us, but I had to ask anyway. Ruedi, I said, are we going up the ladders?

He stops. Looks at me. “You look very serious.” Keeps skinning.

Shit.

I’ve been practicing meditation for two years, and it really came in handy. My admonitions to myself to breathe and not think about anything else got me to the top with minimal panic. But still some panic.

Thus I learned that sometimes the ski tour is more intense than the skiing. That day and the following days, I experienced several moments where I had to go to my happy place during the tour and pretend I couldn’t see all the ways I could die, only to be rewarded with thousands of vertical feet of absolutely blissful turns. On the last day, we were to ascend Woolsey Peak, which Carrie, Heather, and Erica assured me was mellow and not scary at all. It was snowing that day, so we set off with warm (-5 celsius) temperatures and milk jug visibility. Most days started with 2-3 hours of touring, and this last day was no different. Up we went on a relatively gentle grade. We started to traverse a slope on which I was grateful for the lack of visibility: traversing steep slopes makes me nervous, but see no evil, fear no evil, right? We reached a narrow saddle, left and right of which looked like nothing I wanted to go up. Ruedi went up the steep slope to the right, and stood on a narrow perch. He knocked off a bit of cornice. Two of the guys had followed him up. I looked where he was standing and hesitated - why did we ALWAYS have to ski from the highest point? What was wrong with the saddle? Ruedi saw me balking.

“Get up here. You don’t have time to shit your pants!”

With those kind words of encouragement, what could I do but go up?

Once again, we were rewarded. The last big run of the trip was 3500 vertical feet of powder. Yes, we had to climb back up it, but it was absolutely worth it.

Above Nicole is leading the charge up Grizzly with part of our group. She was a fantastic tail guide! Loved being around so many tough women on this trip.

Andy and I went into this trip looking forward to spending a week with Dave and Carrie. Our trip to Japan two years ago with them had been so great, we were excited to take another ski trip with them. We hoped for good skiing, but knew that one has to temper one’s expectations on ski trips, or be sorely disappointed. Our expectations were exceeded, to be sure. Quality time with good friends filled my heart, as did the week of deep belly laughs with our new friends that we met through Carrie and Dave. It felt like a week of Adult Camp / Slumber Party, topped off with outrageous skiing. We will be back!

A few more pictures for your enjoyment. Below are Heather and Tryg, as we head back up Forbidden Peak after a stellar first lap of the day from the Empire Lakes Hut.

Carrie and Erica, bundled up to start the day’s tour from Empire Lakes Hut!

Left to right: Nicole, Bo, Andy, Jake, enjoying a few moments at the transition to touring. You had to watch Ruedi like a hawk during transitions. As soon as he puts away his sandwich and thermos and takes off his puffy jacket, you know you only have moments to be ready to skin before he admonishes you for taking too long!

All smiles on the first day!

Andy coming out of the chalet! That’s a LOT of snow.

Pow turns and more pow turns!

By the Numbers:

February 9-16, 2019

Saturday: beacon school, 4 miles, 2000′

Sunday: 10.5 miles, 5000′ (ish). Climbed Tumbledown Mountain and Glarona; skied the Swiss Meadows, Ricoletto and Tumbledown Gully

Monday:11.5 miles, 5500′. Climbed Hidden Peak, skied Ruth Glacier and Angel’s Crest

Tuesday: 7.5 miles, 3500′. Climbed Fang Peak, skied the Magic Flute

Wednesday: 11.2 miles, 6600′. Climbed Forbidden Peak, Snow Cap Peak. Skied the Snow Maiden

Thursday: 12 miles, 6000′. Climbed Symphony Peak, skied Centrale.

Friday: 10.3 miles, 5500′. Climbed West Woolsey, skied Grizzly, Boogie Basin.

[sentrava]

Where to Drink the Best Natural Wine in Copenhagen

What is natural wine, or naturvin, and why do Danes love it so much? As a city famed for its beer traditions, Copenhagen isn’t somewhere you’d expect to find a thriving wine scene. But while the French revere classic Bordeauxes and Italians praise Tuscan reds, Danes have a special penchant for natural wines.

Natural wine producers don’t work with industrial pesticides or preservatives. Instead, they use environmentally sensitive cultivation methods and native yeasts during fermentation. Experts say this practice creates wines closely reflecting the climate and ecology of individual vineyards.

In Denmark, members of the New Nordic culinary movement were some of the first to bring natural wines to the public’s attention. Chefs offering dishes with sustainable, seasonal ingredients sought beverages with similar properties, and found natural wine to be the perfect accompaniment.

Copenhagen’s natural wine scene is now one of the most dynamic in Europe. These are the best spots in the city to enjoy a glass or bottle of natural wine (naturvin):

  Den Vandrette

Rosforth & Rosforth, one of Denmark’s oldest natural wine importers, owns Den Vandrette, a bar and restaurant located close to Nyhavn’s seaward entrance.

“Sune Rosforth started importing natural wines in the early 90s,” explains Anders Duedam, Den Vandrette’s manager. “He’s half French and originally sourced his wines from the Loire valley. This bar has only ever been about natural wines.”

  With links to producers all over the world, Den Vandrette’s wine selection is often eclectic. “We import a lot of wine from Georgia,” says Anders. “The country is really important within natural wine these days, and I think we, with Sune Rosforth, have been a big part of that.”

These wines also influence the restaurant’s cuisine: “Two weeks ago we did a whole Georgian week – full Georgian wine list, full Georgian menu,” Anders adds.

    Den Vandrette’s day-to-day menu features a range of small sharing dishes. “We’re pretty fish and vegetable-focused,” Anders says. “But we have a new head chef, Dave Harrison, who worked at Au Passage in Paris for six years. He likes to do homemade charcuterie, using whole animals and game as much as possible.”

Something to drink:

  1. Rkatsiteli-Mtsvane: “GoGo” 2017; Kakheti, Georgia; Rkatsiteli and Saperavi 75 DKK per glass, 375 per bottle

2. Laureano: “terme de guiu” 2017; Catalonia, Spain; Macabeo, Granache blanca 90 DKK per glass, 450 per bottle

3. Belloti: Rosso Étoile du Raisin 2007, Piemonte, Italy; Barbera 150 per glass; 750 per bottle

  Den Vandrette

Havnegade 53A 1058 København K

Opening Hours: Mon – Sat 4:00 – 11:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Ved Stranden 10

Ved Stranden 10, an elegant wine bar that overlooks Christiansborg Palace, was one of the first to fully embrace natural wines in Copenhagen.

“When we opened in 2009, the wines we enjoyed happened to be made with a sense of responsibility for the environment and weren’t full of chemicals and preservatives,” explains manager Maurice Chapman. “Today, each of the wines we have here conveys a sense of time and place; when they were harvested and from where.”

With one of the city’s most extensive cellars, Maurice works closely with his guests to satisfy their needs. “We have 1700 references but no wine list,” he says. “So it requires quite a lot on our part to decipher what our guest are after.”

  He continues, “we’re happy to give as many options as it takes to find something that’s agreeable, and the longer one works here, the better one gets at saying, “Ah! I know just what you want.”

Ved Stranden 10 also offers a range of French-influenced dishes, including charcuterie, cheeses, and their famous croque monsieur.

Something to drink:

  1. White Ecke; Niederösterreich, Austria; Welschriesling, Röter Veltliner 75 DKK per glass, 375 DKK per bottle

2. Cuvée 910; Macon, France; Pinot Noir, Chardonnay, Gamay 135 DKK per glass, 675 DKK per bottle

3. Sønne; Steierland, Austria; Sauvignon Blanc 145 DKK per glass, 695 DKK per bottle

  Ved Stranden 10

Ved Stranden 10 1061 København K

Opening hours: Mon – Sat 12:00 – 10:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Pompette

Before co-founding Pompette, Martin Ho spent ten years working with natural wines and their producers across Europe and the US. On returning to Copenhagen, he was surprised by the high cost.

“In France, most good natural winemakers sell their bottles for around five to fifteen euros,” he says, “but by the time they were reaching consumers in Denmark, I found they weren’t accessibly priced anymore. My partner and I wanted Pompette to be a place that made natural wines available to everyone, the way the winemakers intended.”

When Martin opened Pompette with his business partner Jesper Emil Norrie last year, they listed wines at 50 kroner per glass. “At 50 kroner, anyone can come on board,” Martin says.

  He continues: “With fair markups and brutally honest pricing, we’re not making a crazy profit. But who cares when almost anyone can come and enjoy it. Price should never be a barrier for trying natural wine.”

Guests at Pompette can also buy bottles to take home and snack on a range of appetizers, including cheeses and charcuterie, a concept inspired by France’s “cave” wine stores.

Something to drink:

  1. Janko Stekar: Sivi Pinot 2017; Goriska Brda, Slovenia; Pinot Gris 50 DKK per glass, 260 DKK per bottle

2. Weingut Brand: Riesling Free 2018; Pfalz, Germany; Riesling 50 DKK per glass, 272 DKK per bottle

3. Anna & Martin Arndorfer: Pompette Orange 2017; Kamptal, Austria; Gelber Muskateller, Muller-Thurgau, Grüner Veltliner 50 DKK per glass, 316 DKK per bottle

Pompette

Møllegade 3 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Everyday 2:00 pm – midnight  

    Vinsupernatural

After working for several years in fashion and design, Jonathan Soriano established Vinsupernatural, a bottle shop combined with a lifestyle store and deli, with his business partners Joachim Friis & Lars Christensen in January 2019.

“This place is a concept store that’s rooted in natural wines; we’re using the wines to open up other spaces and new ideas,” he explains.

“Here, we identify ourselves more as customers, as aficionados who are working with wines. In other stores, they’ll inform you about the terroir, the history, the grapes. We’re the guys who’ll ask: ‘What’s your favorite junk food?’ ‘What do you like to do when you don’t drink wine?’ We’re more focused on life – this is basically our 360,” Jonathan says.

  Besides its numerous side projects, including pop-up events and product launches, Vinsupernatural holds an enviable wine collection.

“We’re a great entry-level place; we have so many people who are new to natural wines coming here,” Jonathan says. “But we also have many people who are down with natural wines coming here, because we have a selection that others don’t.”

Something to drink:

  1. Dom. des Sarradels; France; Roussillon, Grenache; 125 DKK per bottle

2. Peach of Mind; Ardeche, France; Syrah, Viognier; 200 DKK per bottle

3. Skeveldra; France; Sancerre, Sauvignon Blanc; 310 DKK per bottle

  Vinsupernaturel

Gl. Kongevej 37 1610 København V

Opening Hours: Mon 2:00 – 4:30 pm Tues & Weds 2:00 – 5:30 pm Thurs & Fri 2:00 – 7:00 pm Sat 12:00 – 5:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Manfreds

Manfreds, which opened on Jægersborggade in 2010, was one of the initial restaurants to integrate natural wines within its food menu, an approach extending from its “farm to table” ethos.

“When we opened, Christian Puglisi [Manfred’s owner] wanted to serve as much organic food as possible to guests,” explains Isacco Bartolini, the restaurant’s beverage director. “And later, after the Relæ Community acquired its own organic farm, it was equally important to focus on wines that were free from industrial manipulation – that reflected the terroir, the soil where they were harvested.”

The process of pairing natural wines with dishes in Manfreds, the sister restaurant (and across-the-streeet neighbour) to Michelin-starred Relæ, is unique to each guest.

  “At Manfreds, we have a tasting menu that you can combine with ‘the sommelier’s choice’, which is a set of three different wines by the glass,” Isacco explains. “But if you order à la carte, it’s more common that we’ll direct you to wines that simply follow the flow of your dining experience.”

“Compared with Relæ, where you receive a glass of wine with each dish, it’s a bit more relaxed and freestyle,” he adds. If you don’t feel like a full meal, you can take a seat at the bar and enjoy a glass or two.

Something to drink:

  1. Etienne Courtois: Cuvée des Etourneaux 2014; Solonge, France; Gamay; 125 DKK per glass, 625 DKK per bottle

2. Jean Yves Peron: Cotillon des Dames 2013; Savoy, France; Jacquere; 775 DKK per bottle

3. Colombaia: Vigna Nuova 2016, Colle Val d’Elsa, Italy; Sangiovese; 85 DKK per glass, 425 DKK per bottle

  Manfreds

Jægersborggade 40 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Everyday 12:00 – 3:30 pm (lunch) 5:00 – 10:00 pm (dinner)  

    Peryton

Nick Garner opened Peryton in 2017, a wine bar equipped with a basement art space and its own publication, Oberon.

“When we make a magazine, we have the idea for what we want the vibe to be, but we work with specialists in certain fields,” he explains. “And that’s also what we do with the wines at Pertyon.”

  Nick continues, “I’m not a wine nerd; I’m an enthusiast. So I pick the styles I like and work with those who are super passionate about their products.”

Alongside his food options, which include salads, toasted sandwiches, and bar snacks, Nick offers ten natural wines, a selection he consciously limits. “I want a simple menu that has good, reliable wines on it,” he says. “I’m a little bit turned off by the bourgeois nature of natural wine, so there’s a philosophy behind it: to be straight forward.”

  Nick also holds regular events at Peryton. “We do lots of experimental music evenings which go really well with natural wine, activating the setting in a cultural way,” he says. “But the main idea is to offer a social space for people to meet.”

Something to drink:

  1. Nagelsbjerg Vin: “Amager Wildstyle”; sparkling apple wine from the southern tip of Amager, Denmark; Spontaneous fermentation, no added sulfite 80 DKK per glass, 300 DKK per bottle

2. Eric Kamm: Riesling Sec; Alsace, France 90 DKK per glass, 450 DKK per bottle

3. Viña Sanroke’s “Kilako Espumante”; Itata Valley, Chili; Moscatel de Alejandría 90 DKK per glass, 450 DKK per bottle

  Peryton

Dronningens Tværgade 52 1302 København K

Opening Hours: Weds – Sat 3:00 pm – “late” Sat 1:00 pm – midnight Sun – Tues Closed  

    Ancestrale

Johann Duedahl Jacobsen, Ancestrale’s co-owner, came across natural wines during the latter days of his formal education as a chef and waiter.

“I was trained ‘classically,’ and I’ve tried almost anything you can think of – all the big-name wines in the most peculiar vintages,” he says. “But just as I was about to finish my apprenticeships, I tasted some wines made without herbicides or pesticides, made with indigenous yeast. They stood out to me, and I’ve loved them ever since.”

  Later founding Ancestrale in Vesterbro, Johann stresses the wide-ranging merits of natural wines to his guests via his selection.

“We want to emphasize the quality in wines made via biodynamic practices,” he says. “All of our wines are organic or biodynamic, and we see a future within sustainable approaches to farming and agriculture. It’s what we find interesting in our personal lives and everyday work, and it makes sense for us to promote these values through our small business.”

The wine bar also offers five small dishes, which can be bought singularly for 95 kroner or together for 375 kroner.

Something to drink:

    1. Weingut Brand; Pfalz, Germany; Pinot Blanc 400 DKK per bottle

2. Matassa: Marguerite; Côtes Catalanes, France; Muscat, Viognier, Macabeu 600 DKK per bottle

3. Sextant: Monthélie premier cru; Burgundy, France; Pinot Noir 800 DKK per bottle

  Ancestrale

Oehlenschlægersgade 12 1663 København V

Opening Hours: Mon – Thurs 16:00 – 23:00 Fri & Sat 16:00 – 24:00 Sun Closed  

    Mother Wine

David Biffani co-founded Mother Wine alongside his successful Italian restaurant, Mother, in 2009, during the early years of Copenhagen’s gastronomic revolution.

“What we liked about natural wines was that they offered something new and different each year,” he explains. “Natural wines aren’t supposed to please the market but reflect their environment; we took a similar approach with our food.”

Mother Wine stocks natural, organic and biodynamic bottles from Italy. David and his business partner Nick Pound were among the first to bring these products to Denmark.

  “We started importing wines from day one of opening,” he says, “but at the time, the producers in Italy were quite timid.”

“The first contract we secured was with Lorano, a producer in the Marche region. After trying their wines, we realized the flavors were changing with every sip, and that’s when we knew we wanted this experience every time,” David recalls.

While Mother Wine holds some exclusive brands, David’s philosophy focuses on accessibility: “We’re trying to put natural wine within the everyday context because we think everybody deserves something good to drink,” he says.

Something to drink:

  1. Piccolo Bacco dei Quaroni; Lombardy, Italy; Pinot Nero; 75DKK per glass (restaurant price) 110 DKK per bottle (shop price)

2. Lorano 2014; Marche, Italy; Sangiovese; 95 DKK per glass (restaurant price) 220 DKK per bottle (shop price)

3. Habemus 2012; Lazio, Italy; Granache, Sirah, Carignan 430 DKK per bottle (shop price)

  Mother Wine

Gammel Mønt 33 1117 København K

Wine Bar Opening Hours: Mon – Thurs 10:00 am – 7:00 pm Fri – Sat 10:00 am – 10:00 pm Sun Closed

Mother

Høkerboderne 9 1712 København V

Restaurant Opening Hours: Everyday 11:00 – 1:00 am

    Honorable mentions

This isn’t all! The natural wine scene is continuously growing here in Copenahgen. We also highly recommend Barabba, Gaarden & Gaden and Apollo Bar. And of course, there’s always more to come!

Want more wine in Copenhagen? Check out our recommendations for the best wine bars. Not into wine? Try these beer or cocktail bars instead!

Where to Drink the Best Natural Wine in Copenhagen published first on https://medium.com/@OCEANDREAMCHARTERS

[sentrava]

Where to Drink the Best Natural Wine in Copenhagen

What is natural wine, or naturvin, and why do Danes love it so much? As a city famed for its beer traditions, Copenhagen isn’t somewhere you’d expect to find a thriving wine scene. But while the French revere classic Bordeauxes and Italians praise Tuscan reds, Danes have a special penchant for natural wines.

Natural wine producers don’t work with industrial pesticides or preservatives. Instead, they use environmentally sensitive cultivation methods and native yeasts during fermentation. Experts say this practice creates wines closely reflecting the climate and ecology of individual vineyards.

In Denmark, members of the New Nordic culinary movement were some of the first to bring natural wines to the public’s attention. Chefs offering dishes with sustainable, seasonal ingredients sought beverages with similar properties, and found natural wine to be the perfect accompaniment.

Copenhagen’s natural wine scene is now one of the most dynamic in Europe. These are the best spots in the city to enjoy a glass or bottle of natural wine (naturvin):

  Den Vandrette

Rosforth & Rosforth, one of Denmark’s oldest natural wine importers, owns Den Vandrette, a bar and restaurant located close to Nyhavn’s seaward entrance.

“Sune Rosforth started importing natural wines in the early 90s,” explains Anders Duedam, Den Vandrette’s manager. “He’s half French and originally sourced his wines from the Loire valley. This bar has only ever been about natural wines.”

  With links to producers all over the world, Den Vandrette’s wine selection is often eclectic. “We import a lot of wine from Georgia,” says Anders. “The country is really important within natural wine these days, and I think we, with Sune Rosforth, have been a big part of that.”

These wines also influence the restaurant’s cuisine: “Two weeks ago we did a whole Georgian week – full Georgian wine list, full Georgian menu,” Anders adds.

    Den Vandrette’s day-to-day menu features a range of small sharing dishes. “We’re pretty fish and vegetable-focused,” Anders says. “But we have a new head chef, Dave Harrison, who worked at Au Passage in Paris for six years. He likes to do homemade charcuterie, using whole animals and game as much as possible.”

Something to drink:

  1. Rkatsiteli-Mtsvane: “GoGo” 2017; Kakheti, Georgia; Rkatsiteli and Saperavi 75 DKK per glass, 375 per bottle

2. Laureano: “terme de guiu” 2017; Catalonia, Spain; Macabeo, Granache blanca 90 DKK per glass, 450 per bottle

3. Belloti: Rosso Étoile du Raisin 2007, Piemonte, Italy; Barbera 150 per glass; 750 per bottle

  Den Vandrette

Havnegade 53A 1058 København K

Opening Hours: Mon – Sat 4:00 – 11:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Ved Stranden 10

Ved Stranden 10, an elegant wine bar that overlooks Christiansborg Palace, was one of the first to fully embrace natural wines in Copenhagen.

“When we opened in 2009, the wines we enjoyed happened to be made with a sense of responsibility for the environment and weren’t full of chemicals and preservatives,” explains manager Maurice Chapman. “Today, each of the wines we have here conveys a sense of time and place; when they were harvested and from where.”

With one of the city’s most extensive cellars, Maurice works closely with his guests to satisfy their needs. “We have 1700 references but no wine list,” he says. “So it requires quite a lot on our part to decipher what our guest are after.”

  He continues, “we’re happy to give as many options as it takes to find something that’s agreeable, and the longer one works here, the better one gets at saying, “Ah! I know just what you want.”

Ved Stranden 10 also offers a range of French-influenced dishes, including charcuterie, cheeses, and their famous croque monsieur.

Something to drink:

  1. White Ecke; Niederösterreich, Austria; Welschriesling, Röter Veltliner 75 DKK per glass, 375 DKK per bottle

2. Cuvée 910; Macon, France; Pinot Noir, Chardonnay, Gamay 135 DKK per glass, 675 DKK per bottle

3. Sønne; Steierland, Austria; Sauvignon Blanc 145 DKK per glass, 695 DKK per bottle

  Ved Stranden 10

Ved Stranden 10 1061 København K

Opening hours: Mon – Sat 12:00 – 10:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Pompette

Before co-founding Pompette, Martin Ho spent ten years working with natural wines and their producers across Europe and the US. On returning to Copenhagen, he was surprised by the high cost.

“In France, most good natural winemakers sell their bottles for around five to fifteen euros,” he says, “but by the time they were reaching consumers in Denmark, I found they weren’t accessibly priced anymore. My partner and I wanted Pompette to be a place that made natural wines available to everyone, the way the winemakers intended.”

When Martin opened Pompette with his business partner Jesper Emil Norrie last year, they listed wines at 50 kroner per glass. “At 50 kroner, anyone can come on board,” Martin says.

  He continues: “With fair markups and brutally honest pricing, we’re not making a crazy profit. But who cares when almost anyone can come and enjoy it. Price should never be a barrier for trying natural wine.”

Guests at Pompette can also buy bottles to take home and snack on a range of appetizers, including cheeses and charcuterie, a concept inspired by France’s “cave” wine stores.

Something to drink:

  1. Janko Stekar: Sivi Pinot 2017; Goriska Brda, Slovenia; Pinot Gris 50 DKK per glass, 260 DKK per bottle

2. Weingut Brand: Riesling Free 2018; Pfalz, Germany; Riesling 50 DKK per glass, 272 DKK per bottle

3. Anna & Martin Arndorfer: Pompette Orange 2017; Kamptal, Austria; Gelber Muskateller, Muller-Thurgau, Grüner Veltliner 50 DKK per glass, 316 DKK per bottle

Pompette

Møllegade 3 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Everyday 2:00 pm – midnight  

    Vinsupernatural

After working for several years in fashion and design, Jonathan Soriano established Vinsupernatural, a bottle shop combined with a lifestyle store and deli, with his business partners Joachim Friis & Lars Christensen in January 2019.

“This place is a concept store that’s rooted in natural wines; we’re using the wines to open up other spaces and new ideas,” he explains.

“Here, we identify ourselves more as customers, as aficionados who are working with wines. In other stores, they’ll inform you about the terroir, the history, the grapes. We’re the guys who’ll ask: ‘What’s your favorite junk food?’ ‘What do you like to do when you don’t drink wine?’ We’re more focused on life – this is basically our 360,” Jonathan says.

  Besides its numerous side projects, including pop-up events and product launches, Vinsupernatural holds an enviable wine collection.

“We’re a great entry-level place; we have so many people who are new to natural wines coming here,” Jonathan says. “But we also have many people who are down with natural wines coming here, because we have a selection that others don’t.”

Something to drink:

  1. Dom. des Sarradels; France; Roussillon, Grenache; 125 DKK per bottle

2. Peach of Mind; Ardeche, France; Syrah, Viognier; 200 DKK per bottle

3. Skeveldra; France; Sancerre, Sauvignon Blanc; 310 DKK per bottle

  Vinsupernaturel

Gl. Kongevej 37 1610 København V

Opening Hours: Mon 2:00 – 4:30 pm Tues & Weds 2:00 – 5:30 pm Thurs & Fri 2:00 – 7:00 pm Sat 12:00 – 5:00 pm Sun Closed  

    Manfreds

Manfreds, which opened on Jægersborggade in 2010, was one of the initial restaurants to integrate natural wines within its food menu, an approach extending from its “farm to table” ethos.

“When we opened, Christian Puglisi [Manfred’s owner] wanted to serve as much organic food as possible to guests,” explains Isacco Bartolini, the restaurant’s beverage director. “And later, after the Relæ Community acquired its own organic farm, it was equally important to focus on wines that were free from industrial manipulation – that reflected the terroir, the soil where they were harvested.”

The process of pairing natural wines with dishes in Manfreds, the sister restaurant (and across-the-streeet neighbour) to Michelin-starred Relæ, is unique to each guest.

  “At Manfreds, we have a tasting menu that you can combine with ‘the sommelier’s choice’, which is a set of three different wines by the glass,” Isacco explains. “But if you order à la carte, it’s more common that we’ll direct you to wines that simply follow the flow of your dining experience.”

“Compared with Relæ, where you receive a glass of wine with each dish, it’s a bit more relaxed and freestyle,” he adds. If you don’t feel like a full meal, you can take a seat at the bar and enjoy a glass or two.

Something to drink:

  1. Etienne Courtois: Cuvée des Etourneaux 2014; Solonge, France; Gamay; 125 DKK per glass, 625 DKK per bottle

2. Jean Yves Peron: Cotillon des Dames 2013; Savoy, France; Jacquere; 775 DKK per bottle

3. Colombaia: Vigna Nuova 2016, Colle Val d’Elsa, Italy; Sangiovese; 85 DKK per glass, 425 DKK per bottle

  Manfreds

Jægersborggade 40 2200 København N

Opening Hours: Everyday 12:00 – 3:30 pm (lunch) 5:00 – 10:00 pm (dinner)  

    Peryton

Nick Garner opened Peryton in 2017, a wine bar equipped with a basement art space and its own publication, Oberon.

“When we make a magazine, we have the idea for what we want the vibe to be, but we work with specialists in certain fields,” he explains. “And that’s also what we do with the wines at Pertyon.”

  Nick continues, “I’m not a wine nerd; I’m an enthusiast. So I pick the styles I like and work with those who are super passionate about their products.”

Alongside his food options, which include salads, toasted sandwiches, and bar snacks, Nick offers ten natural wines, a selection he consciously limits. “I want a simple menu that has good, reliable wines on it,” he says. “I’m a little bit turned off by the bourgeois nature of natural wine, so there’s a philosophy behind it: to be straight forward.”

  Nick also holds regular events at Peryton. “We do lots of experimental music evenings which go really well with natural wine, activating the setting in a cultural way,” he says. “But the main idea is to offer a social space for people to meet.”

Something to drink:

  1. Nagelsbjerg Vin: “Amager Wildstyle”; sparkling apple wine from the southern tip of Amager, Denmark; Spontaneous fermentation, no added sulfite 80 DKK per glass, 300 DKK per bottle

2. Eric Kamm: Riesling Sec; Alsace, France 90 DKK per glass, 450 DKK per bottle

3. Viña Sanroke’s “Kilako Espumante”; Itata Valley, Chili; Moscatel de Alejandría 90 DKK per glass, 450 DKK per bottle

  Peryton

Dronningens Tværgade 52 1302 København K

Opening Hours: Weds – Sat 3:00 pm – “late” Sat 1:00 pm – midnight Sun – Tues Closed  

    Ancestrale

Johann Duedahl Jacobsen, Ancestrale’s co-owner, came across natural wines during the latter days of his formal education as a chef and waiter.

“I was trained ‘classically,’ and I’ve tried almost anything you can think of – all the big-name wines in the most peculiar vintages,” he says. “But just as I was about to finish my apprenticeships, I tasted some wines made without herbicides or pesticides, made with indigenous yeast. They stood out to me, and I’ve loved them ever since.”

  Later founding Ancestrale in Vesterbro, Johann stresses the wide-ranging merits of natural wines to his guests via his selection.

“We want to emphasize the quality in wines made via biodynamic practices,” he says. “All of our wines are organic or biodynamic, and we see a future within sustainable approaches to farming and agriculture. It’s what we find interesting in our personal lives and everyday work, and it makes sense for us to promote these values through our small business.”

The wine bar also offers five small dishes, which can be bought singularly for 95 kroner or together for 375 kroner.

Something to drink:

    1. Weingut Brand; Pfalz, Germany; Pinot Blanc 400 DKK per bottle

2. Matassa: Marguerite; Côtes Catalanes, France; Muscat, Viognier, Macabeu 600 DKK per bottle

3. Sextant: Monthélie premier cru; Burgundy, France; Pinot Noir 800 DKK per bottle

  Ancestrale

Oehlenschlægersgade 12 1663 København V

Opening Hours: Mon – Thurs 16:00 – 23:00 Fri & Sat 16:00 – 24:00 Sun Closed  

    Mother Wine

David Biffani co-founded Mother Wine alongside his successful Italian restaurant, Mother, in 2009, during the early years of Copenhagen’s gastronomic revolution.

“What we liked about natural wines was that they offered something new and different each year,” he explains. “Natural wines aren’t supposed to please the market but reflect their environment; we took a similar approach with our food.”

Mother Wine stocks natural, organic and biodynamic bottles from Italy. David and his business partner Nick Pound were among the first to bring these products to Denmark.

  “We started importing wines from day one of opening,” he says, “but at the time, the producers in Italy were quite timid.”

“The first contract we secured was with Lorano, a producer in the Marche region. After trying their wines, we realized the flavors were changing with every sip, and that’s when we knew we wanted this experience every time,” David recalls.

While Mother Wine holds some exclusive brands, David’s philosophy focuses on accessibility: “We’re trying to put natural wine within the everyday context because we think everybody deserves something good to drink,” he says.

Something to drink:

  1. Piccolo Bacco dei Quaroni; Lombardy, Italy; Pinot Nero; 75DKK per glass (restaurant price) 110 DKK per bottle (shop price)

2. Lorano 2014; Marche, Italy; Sangiovese; 95 DKK per glass (restaurant price) 220 DKK per bottle (shop price)

3. Habemus 2012; Lazio, Italy; Granache, Sirah, Carignan 430 DKK per bottle (shop price)

  Mother Wine

Gammel Mønt 33 1117 København K

Wine Bar Opening Hours: Mon – Thurs 10:00 am – 7:00 pm Fri – Sat 10:00 am – 10:00 pm Sun Closed

Mother

Høkerboderne 9 1712 København V

Restaurant Opening Hours: Everyday 11:00 – 1:00 am

    Honorable mentions

This isn’t all! The natural wine scene is continuously growing here in Copenahgen. We also highly recommend Barabba, Gaarden & Gaden and Apollo Bar. And of course, there’s always more to come!

Want more wine in Copenhagen? Check out our recommendations for the best wine bars. Not into wine? Try these beer or cocktail bars instead!

Where to Drink the Best Natural Wine in Copenhagen published first on https://medium.com/@OCEANDREAMCHARTERS