#it stinks to the high heavens lmao

[rickybaby]

I don’t know what it means for Daniel for next year, and I know the speculation about his future is going to be relentless, but I’m just going to enjoy him going racing for this next half of the season. He was handed a second chance in his career and no one can say he hasn’t been giving his all to make it count. Whatever happens next for him, it’s not for a lack of him trying

[rollinouttahere-writes]

I just know that Kaido's ship is STINKING to High heaven.

With how much him and his crew party, his ship probably smells the most like a frat house. It's so bad and all of the spilled alcohol from over the years makes the place smell like a damn distillery lmao

I feel like Big Mom's ship probably smells nice, though. She's constantly having sweets getting made, so it smells like a bakery in there.

[optiwashere]

Horrible realization. Our girls’ beautiful farm life probably stinks to high heaven. Even if they don’t let the non-cat-non-dogs inside the house. No amount of lemon can fight the smell of six chickens. 😭

Yeah, as anyone that's lived on or near a farm can attest... it's gonna be rough lmao.

I grew up next to a pasture for dairy cows. Love those animals. They stink like nothing else.

Blessings on this day of grim realization 💜

[ednito]

This is your excuse to talk about a scarecrow headcanon you really love, please gush for me if you would be so kind!!

Ok.. im so sorry to have ignored this ask for a bit-

Admittedly? There's not a lot of headcanons I like and I don't often headcanon stuff for scarecrow (seriously I add). BUT there is one thing about arkham knight scarecrow I HAVE to talk about that sorta has a headcanon in it.

So, in one of the comics it's confirmed that arkham knight scarecrow is on a liquid diet, I'm sure most people understand what a liquid diet is just by the name alone, and that just FASCINATES me. Like it makes sense for him and arkham knight specifically, it cuts down distractions by some amount and he has more time to work, but I've been told by a bestie of mine what it's like to be on a liquid diet and it's?? So weird???

Obviously urine is gonna be absolutely wack, it's gonna stink like high heaven and you'd have to pee A LOT. Canonically though scarecrow doesn't have much of a smell, yeah there's a light smell of chemicals but it's not bad.

Now here's where I'm getting to headcanon territory. I wholeheartedly believe that he has another musky stench to him that people wouldn't be able to really pinpoint on what because it's so weird, it's not a strong smell but if you've got a sensitive nose you might smell it briefly. That smell? His piss. (LMAO)

LISTEN. Let's be honest, he's probably tinkled a little bit on accident because you gotta piss a lot when on a liquid diet, me and the bestie also joked that he's accidently pissed himself when batman beats the shit out of him but that's up to you to decide on if that's true or not LOL. We've also agreed that he probably pisses In the corner of buildings or on walls or some shit and I joked that people know scarecrows been there cause of the smell and honestly? I kinda headcanon that too- I DONT THINK PEOPLE KNOW ITS HIS PISS BUT THEY SURE KNOW ITS SOMETHING WITH SCARECROW.

But yeah thats the thing that's been on my mind other then my Crack headcanon that AK scarecrow had to get a vagina after the croc attack but we're not gonna get into that

Yeah sorry for the piss talk LMAO

[aimlessarchery]

19. A memory of someone they don’t see anymore

// this one got away from me a little tbh lmao?? anyway the inspiration for this one is the description of the Deliverance Hideout in SOV which reads as follows:

"A vast underground cemetery carved out of the earth. Within, commoner's graves lie next to those of nobles and even Zofian royalty."

Clouds hung heavy and gray in the sky on the day that the Deliverance lost Zofia Castle. Rain drenched their clothes and turned the ground to mud beneath their boots as they fled into the woods, down into the damp crypt that was meant to serve select teams of scouts as a hiding place—now meant to shelter the entirety of their forces. Clive took the lead in the march, ushering them all to safety with his head bent low. He works beside his men to prepare the space for the night—counting supplies, stashing weaponry, clearing out ancient stones to make room for weapon racks and bedrolls. Now he stands beside Python, the two of them brushing cobwebs and dust out of empty loculi. (Python tries not to think too hard about whether these shelves had occupants before, or where those hypothetical occupants may be if they aren't here, where they were supposed to be laid to rest.) In the flickering light of torches and lanterns, the golden sun at the head of the Deliverance looks…sallow. For the first time since Python has joined the force, he sees doubt openly tarnish the face of the shining noble knight. "Was real nice of 'em to clear out and leave space here for our rations," Python says dryly, wiping a hand against his pants in a fruitless effort to clean it. "Our new neighbors might stink to high heaven, but at least they're polite." Clive offers him a small chuckle. "Your optimism is admirable. And a bit surprising, coming from you." Python's responding laugh echoes sharply off the catacomb's stone walls. "Oh, no. Lemme be clear: this is miserable, uh, Sir." The honorific is tacked on as an afterthought at the end, as always. "I'm pretty sure I wrenched my shoulder sticking an arrow in one of Slayde's little friends, this whole place stinks of death, and I've got mud crusted in some unmentionable places. I'm just looking forward to finally getting some rest." "Your resilience, then." Another chuckle. And there it is, that overly polite smile that makes Python want to squirm away. "Thank you for standing with us, Python. Truly." The air is stifling suddenly, filled with dust and noble intent. Python grimaces, returning his attention to the loculi in front of him. Names are embossed along the lower edge of the shelf, the lettering somewhat obscured by age. Around the edges, draconic hands cradle them together—holding them in the Mother's arms. He runs a gloved finger along the raised edges, tracing what remains there.

An--- F-r---us, Duke of Lu--n- R--v-, Sh-p--d's Son No matter the circumstances of our birth, Mila's blessed soil reclaims all of us in the end.

---

The catacombs lack the luxury of space required for any segregation of sleeping quarters. Bedrolls are laid practically from end-to-end of the inner sanctuary. Laid on his side, Python gets a distant view of the entrance. Clive leans against his lance—a pale, fixed figure in the dim light, staring out into the hall beyond. Python rolls over, turning his back to watch the rise and fall of Forsyth's breaths beside him in the darkness. Despite his complaints of exhaustion, he sleeps fitfully. The air is too stagnant. The stone is too cold beneath his side. When he closes his eyes, he dreams of the ceiling collapsing and burying them all as one.

[forlorn-crows]

Has anyone said faith, kaisarion or griftwood yet? (Faith and kaisarion are my alarm sounds, can’t sleep through loud guitar lmao)

griftwood yes, from ricky of course. how did i take this long to get to faith or kaisarion?? hello??

kaisarion:

i mean. the high note. come on now.

ITS THE SOUND OF ANOTHER DEADLINE WHISTLING PAST YOUR EARS / ITS THE SIGN OF A MILLION REGRETS MOUNTING OVER THE YEARS

FAR AWAY FROM THE STENCH OF THE HEAVENS (HYPATIAAAAA) and the lead guitar notes in the background

go straight to (guitar solo)

that drum roll after a matter of love

the breakdown around 3mins into that FUNKY GROOVE with the cymbals

when the drums come back on its the truth of candor and the leadup to the drums at 4:04, to another drum solo i do every time against my steering wheel. plus the drums at the end and the guitar to seal it all off

faith:

faith is creeping up there with my top ghost songs, ngl

i mean come on, the guitars in the beginning into that nasty, heavy driving beat.

that little YEAH before the first chorus and HA before the second

THE HARMONIES IN THE CHORUS. FUCK ME UP. and im watching you FALLLLL

BECAUSE FAITH. IS. MINE. fucking groWL for me PLS

although it (silence) stINKS FEELS AND LOOKS IDENTICAL

2:37 into the growled part im melting. and the drums are too good

the LAUGH and the GUITARS after it

and the because faith. (guitar) is. (guitar) MINE. (guitar) for the end. and the way it goes into See the Light. mmmMMMMM

[thegreymoon]

Heh.

Suffer, evildoers.

***

Eh, this seems too easy.

I would do better to keep quiet until there is more information, but I suspect the governor and/or Di Renjie's friend. Because all the culprits so far have been his friends or the friends of his father.

Like... I don't doubt that Gu and Yi are so corrupt, they stink to high heaven, but I don't think they are guilty of this particular crime.

***

Okay, so now we know for a fact all this is bullshit.

***

In love with this place 💚

***

Who?

***

That's why she plays it?

I'm still waiting for her to become interesting. Or at least get better at acting.

***

LMAO, your womanly wiles aren't going to extract any information from him, you just made yourself suspicious for no reason 🤣🤣

***

I love these aerial views.

***

Doubt.

***

More gorgeousness.

***

LMAO, what is she bringing the drum for?

***

Nothing gets past him.

So... we are supposed to be shipping her with Tuxedo Mask here, and not Judge Dee?

I can get behind that.

At first, I used to think that Tuxedo Mask was Di Renjie when he was younger, but I suppose it's clear now that they are two completely separate people.

***

So lovely 💛

***

Her stupid ass still got on board even though she was warned not to.

Judge Dee's Mystery

I have been practising vampire behaviour these past couple of weeks, courtesy of my new meds for my assorted mental illnesses, so this morning my brain decided it would be just oh so great to wake up three hours before it was supposed to. I will definitely suffer for this later but I did manage to do a bunch of chores and now still have half an hour left before I have to work. I think this time will best be spent by starting a new episode of Judge Dee. After all, I can't think of a better way to begin one's day than by seeing Zhou Yiwei's face.

***

Lovely.

***

Is Modao some kind of weapon?

***

LMAO, she's so excited 🤣🤣

She can't decide what to steal first!

***

Her evil ass again.

***

Oh, fuck off.

I hate the female characters in this drama so far (with the exception of Ma Rong) and I especially hate the Empress.

***

A honest-to-god ghost ship.

***

Their faces, OMG 😅

He's the only one looking calm and composed.

***

This imbecile.

He reminds me of Grima Wormtongue.

***

Oh, they found the person at last.

Hopefully, still alive.

***

How is his father mixed up in all of this?

***

Saving for portrait practice.

***

Gorgeous 💙

***

OMG, they will poison him!

***

Yep, they poisoned him 😠

Poor guy, he survived all that, only to be murdered by lowlifes.

***

What do you mean no poison was found?

[beavesaintmarie]

my face when i gotta watch dany deadass rationalize and justify mass genocide and when i gotta read the takes by this fandom as y’all cheer her on for rationalizing and justifying mass genocide: 

[tenta-cute]

Billy Lore From 'Runaway Max': Chapter 6

Am I procrastinating? A little bit. Not gonna lie, guys, this book is short and fast to read, but not nearly as fun as my 10th re-read of "Cherry" on Ao3. I know my priorities. Anyway! Chapter 6 is extremely short (only 2 pages on my tablet) but it's pretty much all about Billy since it's the aftermath of the Halloween party, so...

Spoilers and lore from CHAPTER 6 under the cut!

Billy doesn't show up to pick up Max. She waits for him for thirty minutes and decides to go home. She arrives home a little after 11PM.

She's immediately cornered by Susan and Neil who ask why she's home so late and where the fuck is Billy.

Susan calls Billy Max's brother. Max feels the strong urge to remind them that he's not her brother, but realizes this is not important at the moment.

Max decides to lie to save Billy's butt! She tells Neil and Susan that some guy from Billy's school needed a lift home, so Billy dropped Max off at Cherry Lane first and will be back home shortly.

Max instantly recognizes this as a very transparent lie and goes all red-faced.

The reason why she lied is because she wants to stop Neil from blowing up, and also save herself from not being allowed to leave the house. It's not stated openly that she wants to protect Billy from Neil, if that's what you were hoping for.

They are all silently standing just staring at one another when the Camaro roars outside.

Billy comes home and oh my. He's drunk as hell, stinks of cigarettes and booze, is clearly unsteady on his feet, and has bloodshot eyes. He's still wearing his leather jacket but Max notes that he no longer has a shirt (which implies that he was wearing a shirt when they left and made the strategic decision to remove it sometime before/during the party, lmao).

So... Confirmed drunk driving.

Neil demands to know where Billy was. Billy mumbles "Nowhere" and tries to move past Neil, but Neil stops him with - oh my - a hand on The Titty.

When Neil keeps pushing, Billy lies that he got a flat tire. Susan and Neil immediately realize that Max's and Billy's lies do not line up.

Susan gets all shocked and stressed about the fact that Billy left Max on her own. She demands to know why Max didn't tell them that Billy abandoned her (to which Max replies "Dunno" and tries to convince Susan that Hawkins is super safe so nothing bad would've happened anyway).

Neil corners Billy against the wall. Wants to know where Billy had learned to be so disobedient.

Max notes that Billy stinks to high heaven of weed.

Billy glares at Neil and tell him to piss off, because he's not in the mood for this.

...Neil is displeased. For a moment they glare at each other, and then Neil starts talking quietly, his voice gradually getting louder until he's screaming in Billy's face about respect.

Susan looks terrified at first but then she seems to... sorta dissociate, I guess? Max knows that in a moment Susan will look away and not do anything to help.

Max leaves. She goes to her bedroom and pushes a blanked into the gap between the door and floor to muffle the sounds. She focuses on counting and sorting her candy.

At first she hears yelling, then a sharp cry and a meaty sound she compares to something hitting a baseball glove. At some point she hears the sound of a body hitting the floor.

Max tries to pretend she's somewhere else, specifically with her dad in Los Angeles. She tries to convince herself that she doesn't care what happens to Billy because he's awful, but doesn't quite succeed. She keeps trying, though, believing that if she lies to herself enough times she will eventually believe them.

Impressions:

Yep, there's no doubt about it: both Max and Susan are perfectly aware that Neil is physically abusive towards Billy.

Just a little thing, but note that during the encounter at the Byers' house Steve Harrington uses the exact same gesture as Neil does in this chapter with the Titty Poke.

The part where Max is aware that she's lying to herself when she tries to pretend she doesn't care about Billy being hurt is pretty interesting in the context of S4, especially the discrepancy between her letter in "Dear Billy" and what she says while trying to provoke Vecna. This is just a private impression, but just like Max tried to talk herself into believing that she doesn't care about Billy in order to protect herself, she might've been doing the same thing to bait Vecna.

[scary-lasagna]

If you dont mind could do you mind doing im bloody painter hcs? Sfw and nsfw (idk why im panicing but i am XD)

aaa don’t panic I haven’t bit anyone! yet

Bloody Painter

Literally the most chill person you will ever meet.

He’s never too loud or getting into things he’s not supposed to.

While not spending his free time drawing, sketching, or painting, he enjoys taking walks outside, usually in wooded areas.

He doesn’t express his emotions well and usually expresses them through his art pieces.

Sometimes they can be abstract, so it’s hard to tell what exactly he’s feeling.

He gives his old drawing scraps to the kids of the manor, and lets them color or modify them as they please.

This boi has excellent fingernails??

No one knows his secret.

it’s clay 

Helen loves to draw with charcoal, and Puppeteer absolutely hates it.

And he might rub it just right to make it screech until Puppeteer yeets the whole charcoal kit out the window.

His hair is soft and floofy, and he’ll blush if you pet it too much.

He’s asked EJ for some leftovers before when he was in a tight pinch.

He tries to keep his s/o away from his work as much as possible.

Not to mention it stinks to high heavens.

Other than that, he may or may not draw his s/o constantly.

We’re talking like a room full of canvases, all that he’s managed to squeeze into a closet.

It’s just because they inspire them so much!

He’s touch starved and if his s/o so much as looks at him he’ll start melting and silently begging for them to hug him or at least give him a hand squeeze.

NSFW

As sadistic as he is, he isn’t much on blood play.

It sees it more of an art medium than anything else, and wouldn’t want to see it go to waste. Plus it’s messy.

Nonetheless, that means he has to hurt his s/o, which is isn’t too down for.

He also has some…explicit drawings of you he keeps hidden under his bed.

He will worship your body endlessly and can spend the whole day pleasing you if you let him.

In trade, just give him a little bit of praise and extra cuddles.

He doesn’t like moaning and tries to hold them back when he’s able to.

But when he does moan, it’s usually mixed with growling in a failed attempt to make him look like big boi man

im sleep deprived can you tell lmao

He’s an average joe when it comes to size and length.

But he’s VERY sensitive.

If you so much as brush your hand against the front of his pants, his member with start to twitch into an erection.

And don’t even get me started when you give him a blowjob.

He’s not so good with his tongue, but he makes up for it with his hands.

But this boi has some long fingers. So you’re gonna get some clit AND g-spot action, lucky you.

Sometimes, if he’s in a playful mood, Helen will take out a small brush and run it along your clit.

He’ll have to pin your hips down and chuckle while you whine and your pussy twitches involuntarily.

He’ll get accidentally rough and dominant sometimes, so you may have to keep him in check to make sure a part of you won’t make it’s way to his paintings.

Easier said than done, because he’s very possessive and dominant once in the zone.

Yes, cuddles are required afterward. If you refuse, he’ll latch onto your arm like an angry teddy bear and never let go until you lay back down with him.

[himboskywalker]

I think my favourite thing about your characterization of Obi-Wan as a senator is that it takes his whole "so uncivilized" act to the next level which is just so opposite to Anakin. Like Obi-Wan hasn't been fighting in a war, he's been to busy being a classy bitch curating the most extra wardrobe and having extravagant dinners with politicians in which I imagine he has impeccable table manners. But Ani is this gross little bug boy who probably tracks mud around the flat and that makes me lose it

Lmao it’s certainly been fun to have Obi-Wan even prissier and more extra than he already is in canon. I decided to really highlight Obi-Wan’s sort of ‘posher’ ‘so uncivilized’ kind of old school upper class English Alec Guinness vibe because I thought I’m sure a lot of that was stamped out of him by the Jedi into this more fastidious and humble,I am here to serve attitude. In Legends material Obi-Wan’s family was well off and land owning and while I’ve definitely leaned in on that,I don’t think it’s too far outside of the realm of how he could have turned out had he not been raised as a Jedi. I won’t lie,my entire premise of him having a super extra fashion sense is entirely built on those fucking ridiculous riding boots he wears,like ?!?!?What an extra bitch,no one can tell me he wouldn’t dress just as bad as Padme given the chance.

And Anakin is a dirty bug boy!!!!I’ve also leaned in a little on that from canon because it’s literally stated that Qui-Gon smelt like a bantha and homeskillet looks like he smells like weed and incense. I imagined had Anakin been raised by Qui-Gon instead of Obi-Wan he would have been even more feral and unbathed bug boy than if Obi-Wan had got ahold of him. So the combination has been this super ridiculously fun perfumed and well groomed Obi-Wan with a our favorite lil’ bug boy who stinks to high heaven and tracks mud all over Obi-Wan’s multimillion credit apartment.

[ajokeformur-ray]

Lmao my dumbass didn’t see matchups as an option ?? a matchup would be cuteee either or!! And I know you SO pick ONE. Please 😂 don’t do both my asks, ONE, UNO, EINS, UN, ODIN. One 😂 you gotta take care of yourself

I found your matchup info. from the other one I did you and I also used things I know about you to write this; hope you don’t mind. And you better hush pffft when do I ever do what I’m told????? So, I’mma do ‘em all. Just let me love you skskskks xp

Hi, I saw you're doing matchup requests so maybe I could try? I am a 5'4' curvy female, really vibrant chocolate eyes, brown hair, little freckles on my nose and cheeks. I am honestly super loud and out there, addicted to Monster Energy so I can be hyper. I am fiercely protective and I can be aggressive defending things I care about. I act tough but deep down I am insecure and deal with bullying a lot :/ ~ @jokershyena​ 

Word count: 1, 765.

Patrick @ you every single day:

This boy. This. fucking. boy. is head over heels for you. He loves you so, so much. You’re the first one to see him, to know him for his real self, and you were the only one who wasn’t afraid of him. “You’re not afraid of me, are you?” // “How can I be afraid of you? No offence, Peppermint, but you’ve never even broken a pinkie promise.” Pat only falls deeper in love with you for that comment.

 You’re 5′4 and I headcanon Pat to be maybe 5′8, which means that he gets to tease you about the height difference. He’s never rude or nasty about it, but your indignant expressions and playfully shocked gasps make him laugh, and that makes it all worth it to you; his laugh is gorgeous. Both of you give as good as you get, and you both adore this aspect of your relationship. Rest assured, if lines are ever crossed (rare, but it may happen in moments of high tensions or stress), things are talked out and neither of you leave the conversation until it’s been sorted out. Pat never raises his voice at you; even if he’s frustrated, he makes a concerted effort to keep his voice at his usual level. He’s not a fan of shouting, anyway. It’s too aggressive and he’s... not about that. Not unless he has to and even then, he hates it. It’s not who he is or even who he wants to be.

He also adores wrapping one arm around your shoulders, fingers curling around your upper arm, and his other arm going around your hips. His arms are solid heat around you, and Pat puts everything he has into every hug. He squeezes you affectionately, making cute little grunts from the effort as he does so, and he really melts into your touch. He’s been through so much, the poor thing, and he just sinks into everything that you give him, even when he’s the one who initiated the hug. You exchange so many of these touches each day that neither of you can ever keep track of it.

Pat loves your eyes. OMG this boy can and will spend hours lying beside you or on top (or even underneath) of you, his own intense chocolate gaze holding your own. He loves to cup your cheeks in his hands and kiss all of your little freckles. When you’re asleep or your head is nestled in his lap, he likes to trace the small constellations on your face, his fingers light and ghosting across your face as he plays dot to dot. He always has the sweetest smile on his full lips while he looks down at you, his eyes alight with love and with the most tender affection. “You’re so beautiful, Lilith.”.

Nothing makes you fall asleep faster or relaxes you quicker than Pat laying with you while you go to sleep, his fingers in your brown hair, lips on your face and his chest rumbling in suppressed laughter as he loves on his hyena. You saved him from his life in Australia; you took him in when you were just strangers and nursed him back to health and in the process did the two of you fall in love with each other. You rescued him and he likes to tell you this often, just so that you know how much he appreciates everything that you’ve ever done for him, how much he loves you. 

Even if Pat stays out late to play pool at the local bar (he doesn’t drink because he knows you don’t like it; and he showers before he comes to bed so that he doesn’t stink to high heaven of cigarette smoke), he makes sure that he’s home in time for you to go to bed; he wants to be there for you so that you know you’re warm and safe and loved, so loved. He may not understand it at first, but after the first few times it happens, he learns quickly how to help you during and after sleep paralysis and/or nightmares. “Hey, hey, Lilith - look at me. Look at me. There you are. It’s okay, love, you’re safe. Starlight’s looking after his moonchild, hm?” He won’t let you go if you don’t want him to - whatever you need, bb <333

You’re loud and chaotic and Pat vibes so well with that. And don’t you dare muffle your laugh or hold it in - he wants to hear you. “Why do you do that, hm? Hide your laugh. Don’t be like everyone else because you’re not, and I love that. So come on - let me hear you.” His chocolate eyes melt as he looks at you, your head thrown back in laughter, your eyes closed when it’s really going... You’re fucking gorgeous and once he’s heard your laugh at it’s most chaotic, he never wants to hear anything else. 

Pat always makes sure that he smokes away from you - he’ll straight up quit for you if you ask him to, he’s not afraid to do so, but if you allow him to continue the habit then he makes sure to step outside or, if it’s raining or snowing, to lean out the window. He always keeps you in his mind with anything that he does. After the death of his grandpa, you are his entire world and everything that he is, everything that he does, is for you. You’re both so, so full of love and your hearts are huge so you cling to each other so tightly. You’re almost always together - unless you’re attending classes or the other is held up somehow. He’s right there when classes end, pulling you back into his arms to bring you back to bed, his lips peppering kisses all over your face. Just at the point that you’re pressing your face up into his lips, wanting more of everything, he laughs and jumps up in a whirlwind of dark colours as he grabs you a Monster out of the fridge, coming back to you as he cracks the tab. “You taste way sweeter than that stuff,” Pat wrinkles his nose but you can tell from the way he leans in to kiss you that he only likes it because you’re drinking it. He’s feline in some ways and this is one of the more obvious ones.

You are extremely protective and this... oh, and this is something which he really does love you for. When you overhear people in the corridor talking about how Pat set a “state warden on fire” or “sold his liver” and other ridiculous things... he ignores it but you see his jaw muscles tick and you see the way he glances down with a slight shake of his head. Even if he pretends otherwise, Pat is daily harmed by his reputation; something he didn’t ask for or even want, and you never stand for it. “Hey! Don’t you dare talk about my starlight like that! Say that about him again - I dare you.” Pat watches, wide eyed, as you stalk up to those people. The first few times he tries to stop you, but you always shake him off. After that, he stands back with his arms folded over his chest, grinning and chuckling. “Hey - “ he calls out to the offenders, “Don’t you know to watch out for Hyena? She, er - she bites. And not just in the fun way.” With a wicked smirk and a salacious wink, you’re both turned on - time to visit the bleachers! ;)

Pat defends you, too, always. He will not stand for any of it, especially knowing that you deal with a lot of bullying. “Hey - “ Heavily frowning will he call out those who are bullying you - “If you’ve got a problem with Lilith, you’ve got a problem with me - so come on!” and he won’t back down. This is one of those times he considers himself lucky to have such a fierce reputation - all he has to do is say something like that and stalk forward, and people scatter like ashes in the wind. He turns to you, then - “Are you okay? Did they hurt you?” and he cups your beautiful face in his hands, his intense gaze checking you over. Pat diffuses any tension by kissing you so soundly that your toes curl in your socks.

When you get insecure about anything, Pat is there with furrowed brows, watery chocolate eyes as he listens to you - the things you don’t like about your body or about your personality or about your BPD and other illnesses - he listens to everything and he pulls you into his broad chest. One arm wraps around your waist and the other smooths up and down your back in fluid motions. Your fingers in his dark curls, your lips feathering kisses all over his face, your legs entangled... you often fall asleep after heart to hearts in which you open up to each other and somehow bond on an even deeper level than before.

“Don’t you ever change yourself, Lilith. Not for anyone or anything - unless it’s for you and because you want to. Don’t let anyone ever make you feel like you don’t deserve what you want. You’re so strong, love. You work impossibly hard and you love even harder. You have a heart of gold, moonchild, don’t you see? I love you, so much. Don’t you ever forget it, okay?”

He’ll bring you to tears but that’s okay. He’ll kiss and wipe every tear away and crack jokes to make you laugh. Patrick loves you so much that it genuinely hurts sometimes and he knows that he’s also cherished and adored. 

“Peppermint?” // “Hm?” // “You’re such a pretty boy.” // An amused chuckle. “You think I’m a pretty boy?” // “You’re my prettiest pretty boy.” You always get kissed for such a wonderful compliment - Pat adores being called a pretty boy. It’s one of his many secrets and only you’re trusted with it. It’s just another way for him to say that he loves you.

Both of you act tough but both of you feel and hurt deeply. You’re always there for each other, through better or for worse, and so long as you’re able to come home to each other, why, you both have the entire world. You’re his hyena and he’s your koala and that’s the way it’s always been and will always be.

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

i thought about this a lot when i was in hospital after my stomach tumour surgery. farting and burping was seen as good things, because it meant that my stomach was working properly again. i passed an ileus and my GOD. it’s stank to high heaven. i gagged, i almost threw up. so never tell me that your shut don’t stink. because my god. when the time comes, it will make you want to throw up. i was backed up for about a week 3 days after it. i had like 3-4 enemas while in hospital. i lost control of my bowels since the surgery was so big. yes, your body does gross things. like farting, like losing your bowel movements, making you lose a litre of blood because of an ileus. i was on oxygen and a green pain button (which i’m sad i couldn’t take with me lmao but fentanyl ain’t your friend after hospital) for a month

i speak about this because it’s so important to get yourself checked and go through “gross” procedures like a gastroscopy (ie a camera down the throat) and the minor body things that are considered gross by adults, like burping and farting, are actually essential things for your body to do. like okay yeah, maybe don’t loudly burp in an open office or something like that, but just in general every day life, even burping and farting should be seen as non-gross things.

i think grossness is a vital aspect of life btw and we all experience it and i think its important to represent in art and i think oversanitization of popular media is 100% our downfall. things are gross and disgusting and yucky and thats life we cannot deny ourselves this

[sebastard69]

Post-Heavensward Thoughts

Just started the pre-Stormblood patches, so here's an update on how this game is making me feel, in no particular order.

Under the cut for spoilers!!

- Aymeric and Estinien are boyfriends, and I'm going to kick Estinien's ass for leaving without saying goodbye

- FINAL STEPS OF FAITH HAD ME CRYING AAAAAA??? ESTINIEN TRYING TO KILL HIMSELF?? YSAYLE'S GHOST?? HAURCHEFANT'S GHOST?? FUCKING END ME THAT SHIT HURTED. A+ fucking writing though god fucking damn was it good. And the song that played during the battle and the cutscene??? Immaculate.

- I'm glad Hraesvelgr isn't dead, I was worried for a second that he was after the fight with Nidhogg

- I'm not sure how I feel about Krile? Like I like her but also she just kinda... rubs me the wrong way? Idk the whole scene where she was giving Thancred shit for NOT flirting kinda irked me

- So Minfilia isn't dead, but she is? But she isn't. But... she is? I understand that Hydaelyn like... brought Minfilia to Her side in the aetherial sea, but I don't know that I know what that means. I know that Ryne exists later and Thancred called her Minfilia in the Shadowbringers trailer, so Ryne is Minfilia? Or Minfilia is Ryne? Yknow I should probably let that shit unfold in its own time.

- There is something FISHY going on with the WoL, right? I mean first in ARR, we find out that the Echo gives you the ability to possess other bodies and thus extend your life, similar to Ascians - which is a whole thing on its own tbh - but then Fantasy Pope got all freaked out after I curb stomped his ass and was like "what the fuck ARE you??" and I'm like.... I don't fuckin know Thordan, what AM i? there's some weird connection between the WoL and the Ascians. is it because of what the Word said when i was in the aetherial sea? the stuff about Dark and Light existing as one, and Zodiark and all that? HMMMMMMM

- GOD i hate emmanellain lmao he's so annoying and i find it absolutely hilarious that thancred punched him out after stopping me from doing the exact same thing. eat shit emmanellain!

- Alphinaud once again continues to be my favorite. It's cute how much he likes Estinien. Yet another reason to kick Estinien's ass for leaving without saying anything!

- ALISAIEEEE Q~Q i know she's gonna be ok but GOD

- what exactly is up with the warrior of darkness, what's his plan? i'm about to unlock xelphatol so i'm sure i'll know more soon but that shit stinks to high heaven, especially since urianger is either involved or knows what's happening

[cherubark]

wait anon who asked about what document: found the document. its fake as hell. like i know jack shit about legal stuff but just seeing what are allegedly thell and insolents legal names and then "rezzyrez" makes it stink to high heaven

Yeah, lmao. But, y'know. Allegedly, for legal reasons, to err on the side of caution, for safety's sake, I'm not spreading it.

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 17.10.17 lb

heyyyyy, palindrome date! ^^^ 

also, is2g there better be a lot of rikara today to make up for yesterday’s fuckery or imma flip. 😣😣😣

ugh what is this fuckery???? like flying coach isn’t unbearable enough already without a bunch of obnoxious qawwals and their ghissi pitti shayari. I JUST WANT SILENCE AND LEG SPACE TILL I REACH MY DESTINATION OK?!?!?!

the most unrealistic thing about this set here is the amount of leg space between the seats btw. the only person who i know who flies coach comfortably is my mom, and she’s barely 5 feet tall on a good day. 

shivaay be like “economy class. never again. in fact commercial air travel never again. never not taking the private jet. i’m not meant for this peasantry.” 

ANIKA STOP DRAWING ATTENTION TO YOURSELF YOU IDIOT

damn this lady qawwal be forward af. give me her confidence. 

“i’m not majnu. i’m shivaay singh oberoi.” pffffffffffffffft. 

ok shivaay, literally no one gives a fuck about your philosophy about love rn when you haven’t even bothered telling your wife where you’re going. excuse me if i’m not swooooning, even if your dumbass wife is in the background there. 

ANIKA PUT THE NIQAB BACK ON YOU IDIOT 

lmao her pride on “her asar” on him tho. 

“mere majnu hai!” haha awwwwwwwwww

jennifer is me. i am jennifer. i wish i drank - it would make it so much easier to get through the day. 

jenny’s pissed at shivaay for walking up and down the aisles like it’s his baap ka plane and i don’t blame her one bit. 

bua - don nonsense. 

aaaaaaaaand anika’s seen bua. 

and bua’s seen anika. oufffff. 

lol anika’s switching seats as though this be a local bus. 

OUFF MORE BUA DON. CAN WE NOTTTTTTTTTTT!??! 

hahaha shivaay sits down to discover begumjaan as seatmate. 

“aap se seedha tum pe utar aaaya miyaan? ajnabi potti ke saath aisa tu-tadaa kaiko hona???” “ajnabiii???? realllllly????? 😒😒😒” 

one - surbhi really honing the hyderabadi urdu she got from bobby jasoos waala tiny role. and two - hubs bhi chodne waale nahi hai now that he’s gotten her cornered. 

snorttttt, she’s sooooo annoying and doing fulllll on ungli. 

“tumhare chauffeur.... SHOHAR allow karte hai kya?” 

lol like she needs YOU to allow her to do anything. 

“enough anika!” “aniSa begum! aniSAAAA!” “naam badalna hi tha toh kuch aur rakh leti, apna hi naam ulta karne se kya hota hai?” “jaldi jaldi mein aisa hi hota hai. 😣😣😣”

pfffffffffffffffft, anikaaaaaaaaaaaa. 

lmao shivaay is so fucking doneeeeeee with this terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day already. and it’s jusssssssssssst getting started. 

ooooh challenge. he’s gonna make her admit it’s her. this is gonna be funnnnnnnnnnn. and she’s like I’LL NEVER ADMIT IT. 

god nakuul looks so exhausted in the close ups. someone give the man some b6/b12 or something. 

i knewwwwwwwwww it. i knew she’d be terrified at take off! 

haaye. babies. warming my cold dead heart. 😭😭😭😭💖💖💖

YAS. DILPREET. MY BABY. I HAVE REASON TO LIVE.

ok omki’s purana waala socialist-communist side is coming out. 

but alsooooooo violent oberoi side. yikes.

“tussi vi nahi jande main kaun hoon ji.” 

more like mera bhai kaun hai but ok. 

so this “sardar naal panga” thing is a recurring thing here to stay huh? 

LMAO I RELATE WITH JENNIFER’S FRUSTRATION LEVEL SO MUCH, IT’S NOT EVEN FUNNY. 

ok fwding this bua nonsense. FUCKING GIMME MORE SHIVIKA/RIKARA IN THAT TIME. UGH. 

patidev ke dimaag ke phurze ghooming to make wife admit.  

ooooooh. tobasco. he’s allergic, remember? 

why do i know this shit????? i barely know what *i’m* allergic to. wtf is my life even, lord. 

god these two idiots are so ridiculoussss. ek hai ki he’s willing to ingest an allergen to break her, and doosri hai ki she’s gonna do something extra af to stop him without breaking. 

this maaaaaaaa is so fucking useless. i hate her so much. i need her to DIE. now. 

oh omkiiiiii you’re such a bad liar. and you talk waaaaaaaaaay too much as dilpreet. 

but you’re so stinking cute i can’t even. ugh. so cute. *pulls your cheeks* 

since when is omki suchhhhhhhhhhh a believer in god? matlab, itna drastic change from naastik, so quickly?? 

girl you’re staring at his face and... like... i just can’t. IT’S THE SAME FACE AS YOUR HUSBAND!?!? IT’S NOT EVEN LIKE AWAIII KE IDHAR UDHAR KE SIMILARITIES. IT’S THE EXACT SAME FACE. 

LMAO HIS PANICKED YELLING AT THINKING IT’S A RAKHI HAHAHAHA

ok based on whattttt is this “sabse achcha dost” - you’ve known him 48 hours. 48 hours. it takes me more time than that to decide on whether i should buy a pair of shoes i saw at the mall. 

ok but then gauri always moves on fast fwd. omki ko pati bhi maan liya tha, in like 3.43 minutes. yeh toh at least 2 din le liye dosti ke liye. 

awwwww he’s all weepy and emotional at being considered a friend. ouff, this man and his redemptionnnnn. my hearttttttttttttt. i wanted to hate him some moreeeeeeeeeee. 

meanwhile this fucker is about to kill himself... 

great. don bhi ghus gaya in dono ke beech mein. bas iski kami thi. 

“she’s my wife ok, she’s anika!” “ya allah, yeh daadi waala pottta mere peeche hi pad gaya!”

lololololol

ummmmmmmmm why did anika just randomly attack sundari bua? what the fuck even. ouffffff. 

ok dilpreet calm the f down with the gauri praise, you looking hella thirsty. 

ugly has put nazar on gauri and omki’s pati waale ghanti are ringinggggggg. 

DAT JAW CLENCH THO. 

oh ugly is ladke ka bhai. 

may we all be blessed with a man like dilpreet in our lives who fucks up men who leer at women with luchi tuchi gandiiii nazarein. 

WHY IS BHAVYA STILL STANDING???? DID HE NOT BUY HER A SEAT???? YOU’RE REQUIRED TO BUY HER A SEAT, RUDRA!!!!!

“babyyyyy i need some actionnnn.” 

may we all have baby’s confidence in demanding action when we want it. 😉😉😉

oufff nonsense naach gaana. fwding. 

OK WTF SHE JUST FELL DANCING INTO THE COCKPIT AND PRESSED SOME RANDOMASS LEVER WHAT EVEN IS THIS SHOW MY GOD I ACTUALLY FEEL MY BRAIN CELLS DYING WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF

*DEEEEEEEEEEEEP BREATHS AND VISUALIZES OMKI AND ABHAY’S FACES TO REMIND MYSELF WHY I DO THIS* 

where’s abhay today? i miss his cuteass face.

gauri’s more dressed up than the bride. why does richa look so pheeeeki??? 

ugly ko kya aitraaz hai ab? 

pffffffffft. cheap tactics. dafaaaa ho, ugly. 

UGH UGLY YOU’RE SO CREEPY. I HATE YOU. 

LET GOOOOOO OF HER CREEEEEEP. 

also sardar ka sar ghoooom raha hai. ab dangal hoga! 

aaaaaand those weirdass diamond teeth of bua’s are in... shivaay’s pockets???? great. he’s gonna be caught for fucking smuggling now. GOD. 

lmao whut, india doesn’t even have an air marshal system!!!!!!!! 

WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS PLANE WAAALA PLOT MAN I CAN’T EVEN ISSE ACHCHA TOH ABHAY AUR TANYA KA CHUTIYAAPA DIKHAATE

every time they show maaaaaaaa, my bp goes up by 10 points. i hate her so much. useless woman. 

isn’t this golden dupatta gauri’s wearing pilfered from anika’s ghatiya shaadi waala wardrobe?? 

OK HANDS OFF, UGLY!!!! 

lol omkiii’s sidelines waala glaring. 

wow, ugly has the power to undo dori by just staring. like joey could undo a bra by just looking at it! amaze! 

justtttt like in ipkknd, i don’t even get why this is such HAWWWWWWW waala issue. waise saara ka saara outfit is backless, yeh choti si dori kaunsi izzat bacha rahi thi??? awaiii ke “sanskaari” chonchle.

wow omki, that was not smoooth at alllllllllll. like, you coulda done that with some more finesse???

but fuck me over my trash heart loves this trope to the high heavens. i do i do i do. give me allllllllllllll the dori scenes! 😫😫😫😫

mental note: go read @vishwaspur ka seskkkky waala fic again. 

LMAO HIS ANGRY SHOULDER SHIMMYING IN THE BG WHILE GLARING AT UGLY 😂😂😂😂😂

oh boyyyyyy is it about to be a dance off???? #teamDilpreet

HAHAHA HE ACTUALLY GAVE HIM THE I’M WATCHING YOU GESTURE. PFFFFT SUCH ALPHA MALE NONSENSE. 

WHAT NEXT OM, YOU GOING TO PEE AROUND HER? 🙄🙄🙄

oh. back to murder foursome and shukla. 

lmaoooo how conveniently shukla slipped back into a coma to avoid answering abhay’s questions. amazing tactic. i should try this sometime. 

ugh. ugly’s cornering gauri again and fucking maaaaaaaaaaaaa just dragged omki away. 

fuck you maaaa, you can’t do anything right!!!!! 

HEY UGLY, CAN YOU NOT SEE HER MANGALSUTRA???? LIKE???? 

wait??? he knows???? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU, FREAK???? WHY IS EVERYONE IN THIS SHOW TOTALLY COOL WITH POLYGAMY?????? 

god this is suchhhh a nonsensical situation. as is all of this stupid show and alllllllll the plotlines right now. but you know me....