#it sounded simple but it was raw af

[empty-dream]

“You lied about one thing. You do have an attachment to life. Yeah, you love your wife. To you, her very existence makes life worth living, yes?”

[phantomoftheorpheum]

The Umbrella Academy Season 4 Review/Critique

Fair warning- this is ridiculously long. If you expand this post and don't actually want to read it, it will be a pain in the ass to scroll through; I would advise against it.

Just to be 100% clear, these are my opinions and interpretations of the show. If you don't want to see criticism (and quite a lot of it) or read a pretty raw, unfiltered/unedited review of the season, this is not for you. This is a casual platform, so I tend to just let myself think out loud on these posts, meaning that I don't go back and heavily edit my thoughts. I may express ideas for the storylines that would need some refining, I'm generally just spitballing.

This is a very criticism heavy post, I have a lot of issues with this season, so if that will upset you, please just don't bother to read this. I will be tagging anti tags (due to the large amount of criticism I have for the show) for filtering purposes.

*** Spoilers for all 4 seasons of Umbrella Academy ***

Good Stuff First

I always like to start with my favorite stuff from the show, because usually if I am bothering to critique, it means I have a lot of criticisms, but I always want to acknowledge what the show does well before I start getting into what it does not do well.

Individual Characters & Dynamics - In particular, I thought Klaus's unique character voice was present and well written and the performance continued to be top notch (I have some criticisms about the actual storyline, but I think Robert nailed what he was given from an acting standpoint). Many of the specific dialogue and character dynamics felt consistent to earlier seasons, which can be difficult with such a wacky show. There are definitely some characters who were able to shine, regardless of what they were given.

Visuals/Sets - The show still looks as good as it ever has. It's never been groundbreaking cinematography, but you can feel the budget in the aesthetics of the show. It has been able to maintain this weird "almost our world, but not quite" reality in a visual manner since season 1. It has a distinct style and look. The sets largely feel big and textured and expansive, even when they're fairly simple. I like that we've at least glimpsed the house in every season.

Tone/Humor - The Umbrella Academy is weird. It has always been weird. It must be weird or else it would feel... bad weird? It does succeed in continuing to be weird AF. I like that the show isn't afraid to be incredibly strange. It is a show that swings big. The humor is still there. Humor is hard, and I think they hit more often than they miss.

Family Road Trip - The group dynamic, family bickering, montage effect of 4x02, etc. was one of the lighter and more enjoyable choices made in season 4. The bit of "annoying song stuck on a loop" that continued to crop up throughout the season worked for me.

Abigail Completely Failing at Being Gene - This is only a very small part of the season, but Nick Offerman playing an alien cloaked in a (very weird) human skin and very poorly pulling it off added some levity while it lasted.

Soundtrack - While I think there are fewer distinctly standout tracks for this season (but this is entirely a personal opinion, maybe others feel differently), the show's commitment to its distinctive sound and use of music is still solid. I particularly appreciated the callbacks to season 1, obviously I Think We're Alone Now, but also by selecting Dead To The World in 4x06 for Five (I prefer In The Heat Of The Moment as a song, personally, but the choice was very clever). This is a show that I genuinely like to go listen to the soundtrack of after the season, and I intend to do that with this season as well (except for the Christmas stuff, I am not a big Christmas songs person).

The Cast - This is related to point one, but I really think 99% of the cast did they best they could with the material they had to work with.

Despite all my criticisms, I still found myself sad to be at the end of the journey. And I think that says something about the strength of these characters. A perfect journey? No. But one I'm still glad that I took.

My Criticisms

I want to start by saying that if I bother to critique something, that means I believe it has enough potential to be worth discussing. If it didn't, I absolutely would not bother. So while I think this is going to come off quite harshly, it is coming from a place of "I love what this show can be when it's at its best, and here's how I personally think we could have been closer to its best."

A lot of times when I write up my thoughts about a show, I start with my most specific criticisms, and as I examine those, it points me to a bigger underlying issue. Sometimes I work the other way around, thinking about the larger elements I have criticisms of, then searching out examples. But in this case, either way, I find myself ending up at the same place with the same issue, and that issue (perhaps ironically for this particular show) is time.

I believe the largest issue with season 4 is time management, crafting storylines that are interconnected and therefore justify their screen time, and pacing. Yes, I have some criticisms that could not be fixed with better time management, but a lot of my issues lead back to this. Pacing is always a tricky element, is at the top of many criticism lists of many shows, and has been at the top of my list for several shows I reviewed this year. Pacing issues seem to be cropping up more and more with streaming service based shows on all platforms, and I don't think that's coincidental. But, imo, Netflix is our best example.

One of the greatest strengths of Netflix Originals, back when they first started, was the guarantee of a full season before a cancellation. Because they had no feedback on a show before producing and releasing an entire season, there were no early mid-season cancellations. This allowed writers a little more room to stretch out, knowing they wouldn't walk into work the next day and be told they have 2 or 3 episodes to wrap up a story, or worse, wake up to just no job at all. So while the seasons were shorter, the time was guaranteed. Many of Netflix's early properties, particularly if their first season was successful, were greenlit for multiple seasons at a time, a practice which has been all but abandoned (Bridgerton and Stranger Things have been afforded this luxury in recent years, but few other shows). But as Netflix (and other streaming services) got its legs under itself, it came to realize that there was more profit in producing the first season of many shows, then cancelling all but the most successful. This epidemic of unfinished stories has been spreading rapidly. Now, not only does Netflix have an extremely high cancellation rate and rarely renews a show for more than a season at a time, it has also been shortening seasons, bringing down production costs, and trying to minimize risk and maximize "safe" profits. Minimizing risk in favor of maximizing safe profits rarely results in good art. Which explains a lot.

And so, unfortunately, I think The Umbrella Academy is a casualty of this increasingly mercenary system. Not only was it forced to make creative decisions with the constant threat of "This could be the end, but you won't know it until after it airs, so it also has to work as not the end," during the first three seasons, but though it got warning of its final season, it received a limited run to complete the show. Now, I can't fault anyone for wanting to write each season as a possible ending, considering how often Netflix cancels shows. Is this smart? Yes. Is this also limiting? Yes. And shows like The Umbrella Academy, with universes that become increasingly complicated with increasingly detailed lore, suffer quite a lot when trying to contain a story to each individual season. And finale seasons are particularly difficult. Expectations are high. Netflix's production model gives audiences years to build up their anticipation for the finale. Too much time to think, to pick holes in what has already been created, to cool to something they were once passionate about. Delivering a genuinely satisfying finale under these circumstances would be a daunting task.

But with all that being said. Season 4 only has 6 episodes, and it somehow manages to waste so much time. I don't know what's in the water over at Netflix, because I don't know if anyone knows how to waste limited time like Netflix does. If it weren't so irritating, it would almost be impressive.

The truth is, very few of the main characters really matter to the overarching plot of the season, which is a very weird choice, particularly in a final season. It's basically Ben, Jennifer (who we barely know and just met), Hargreeves, Abigail, and tangentially Viktor. Five & Lila are basically completely taken out of play for an episode and a half, where their actions have practically no relevance to the main plot, and the critical information Five gets while using his "new" power could easily have happened without this storyline. Luther & Diego are similarly sidelined by the CIA storyline. And, again, Klaus & Allison are occupied with a side plot that removes them from the main conflict of the season and does not tie in to the finale.

I do not mind the centering of Ben & Jennifer for a season of the show in theory, but with only 6 episodes to tell this story, I think it was a stretch to believe they had the time to do this plotline justice and waste so much time elsewhere. I don't know if this was solely a me issue, but I just... didn't care about Jennifer. I mean, sure, I rooted for her in a passive "she seems nice" kind of way, but even by the end we barely know anything about her. I can live with a "cosmic connection" insta-love situation between Ben & Jennifer (not my favorite trope, but it can be okay), but just because Ben instantly connects with Jennifer, that doesn't mean the audience does. And, to make matters worse, this version of Ben is one that we don't know that well, anyway. Like... his defining character trait is that he's mean and angry. I didn't mind that in season 3, as he was new to us and at odds with our protagonists for most of the season, but we don't really learn much new about him in season 4, either. The bit of Ben's history that we get is from Umbrella Ben, not Sparrow Ben. And Sparrow Ben's personality and history isn't touched on. Why is he like this? It's never explored, not beyond the shallow "the Sparrow Academy wasn't raised as the family that the Umbrella Academy was" that was established in season 3. The fact that we know so little about this version of Ben makes it harder for me to connect with him, as well. So to center these two characters in the final season, and then not even give us scenes to flesh them out as individuals, it just feels like such a waste of time. It didn't need to be Ben and Jennifer. In fact, it very much felt like it was only Ben and Jennifer because everyone has always wanted them to tie "the Jennifer incident" into everything. Again, I think this plot could work fine if given the correct amount of screen time, but as it is, it feels rushed and shallow. We might care about Sparrow Ben (might), but we don't have much reason to care about Jennifer.

Lack of direction - There are only six episodes in this season! Every minute needs to be used wisely. This should be the most focused of all the seasons, every storyline streamlined to tie into the finale of the show. Which is the opposite of what we got. For the vast majority of the show, nothing Klaus or Allison does matters. Nothing Diego or Luther does matters. Nothing Five or Lila does matters. Sure, those storylines touch on individual character development, but when you're planning to kill everyone off in a couple hours anyway, why are we starting down unconnected character arcs that are destined to be left hanging? Every bit of interpersonal character development should be written in a way that ties into the finale plot of the show, so scenes can pull double duty and maximize the limited time available. What was the purpose of Lila and Diego fighting (other than to physically separate them)? What did they learn? How did they change or grow? They didn't. They are split apart, sent down different dead end roads, only to be gathered back up in time to die. They speak words of understanding, but we don't actually get to see them learn or put those changes into practice.

I think about it this way- if Lila and Five had gotten lost into the weird limbo subway system and we never saw what happened to them, and instead they just reappeared from that adventure for the finale, would that fundamentally change anything about how the show’s main plot plays out? No. It wouldn’t. If Klaus had stormed off in 4x03 and Allison had gone after him and we’d never seen either of them again until the finale, would that fundamentally change anything about how the show’s main plot plays out? No. It wouldn’t. If Diego and Luther had gotten their CIA passes and walked into that building and vanished from the story until the final episode of the show, would that fundamentally change anything about how the show’s main plot plays out? No. It wouldn’t. Even Viktor, who is directly addressing the main plot point of Ben & Jennifer’s connection becoming apocalyptic, has very little impact on that storyline leading up to the finale. He speaks to Ben once, he insists on trying to save Ben, and spends the rest of the time working through personal issues with his dad or being attacked in a sequence that has no consequences. The conflicts that these characters encounter have very little bearing on the physical events of the show (they get shot at, they escape. They fight, they escape. They are chased, they escape) and what are the specific consequences? There aren’t any. Viktor gets to use his powers to save Hargreeves and gets shot (I think??) doing it, but he’s fine, and it doesn’t change their approach or goals in any way. Five and Lila are trapped together for years and have a romantic relationship, but then they “go home” and it doesn’t lead to any of the characters deeply changing or acting notably differently in the following events (Five and Diego fight at a bad time, we get a funny reaction from the other siblings, etc. but it doesn't change anything) and then it is never truly resolved. Luther and Diego go to the CIA and this plot is used as a vehicle to reveal the villainy of Five’s boss (so??), but ultimately Luther and Diego get a big fight sequence, learn very little, and take up a lot of screen time for a reveal that could easily have happened in seconds. None of their actions in this storyline blatantly effects the outcome of the show. And Diego feels set up for some character work, but all it really leads to is him being like "I get it," and that change never getting a chance to be actionable. Allison and Klaus reconcile, but only after a lot of screen time is spent on another side quest. Do they really change as people from this story? We don't know because there's not enough time to see. This is clearly not a legit substitution for actually addressing the issues between them, but we don’t have time to do that, either. Not to mention, the conflict between Klaus and Allison isn’t some slow burn issue. It’s doesn’t exist before this season. What is the point of any of these plot lines? Why send Allison and Klaus off together to resolve issues that we only just found out exist, when Allison has canonically been estranged from all of her other siblings since the events of season 3? That is blatantly an unresolved issue, but instead of using her screen time to address her season 3 actions, they create a whole new issue for her and Klaus to fight and then reconcile about. Wouldn’t it be much more interesting to see Allison and Viktor work through their issues once and for all? Or to address all of the ways Allison betrayed Luther in season 3? What about Klaus reconnecting with this version of Ben? What about Luther working through being betrayed by his father? What about Diego and Lila actually being parents? What about really getting to see how this life that Allison sold them all out for isn't even the dream she thought it would be? What if, instead of getting a montage of Lila & Five’s romance, we got a montage of Jennifer and Ben finding and destroying each other in many different worlds? You want to sell me on this tragic, cosmic connection between them? Okay. Sell me on it. Make it hurt. 

Five - I'm just going to be brutally honest here- I believe Five is the strongest driving force of the show and his sidelining in season 4 was a huge mistake. Five might not be the emotional core of The Umbrella Academy, but he is absolutely central and critical to what has worked well in previous seasons. And yet, in season 4, he's pushed to the side and basically written out of the main plot for half of 4x04 and all of 4x05. And then, even when he is around, he's lost a lot of the elements that make him a fan favorite. Let's talk about that- in season 1, Five's return and his mission is where it all kicks off. Yes, technically the inciting incident is Hargreeves' death, but gathering the family without Five's arrival would have been useless and led nowhere. Five drives the entire plot of season 1, while the rest of the siblings get character arcs around him. He makes things happen. He withholds information from his siblings and from the audience. Without him moving the plot forward and tying things together, season 1 would have been a disjointed mess. In season 2, we follow Five's attempts to reunite the family and fix yet another doomsday. Again, he is the one that pushes the plot forward, while the other siblings wander down various other storylines (which is not to say that they are not involved and don't contribute, just that they don't move the plot along to the same degree). In season 3, Five attempts to "retire," but pretty quickly he's back in the thick of things in search of answers and solutions. He is set against Hargreeves in an intellectual face off and is ultimately the one who pieces together the hotel's puzzle. He also discovers that he is, essentially, his own nemesis and behind a lot of what happened in previous seasons (a storyline that feels like it had a lot more to give, possibly, but is abandoned and explained away as "something a version of him did in some timelines,"). But in season 4, Five is... Well, he's suddenly not that relevant. He starts out fine, undercover and attempting to infiltrate The Keepers, and he does push the initial plot forward with his investigation, but then he just drops off the map (literally and figuratively). Five, who has always been the character to seek out answers and the character the audience trails through the bigger plot points of the story, is suddenly out of play. Now we're watching him wander around the multiverse (presumably for an attempt at character development, which ultimately falls flat) where he learns nothing important and falls unconvincingly in love with his brother's wife for an episode and half. Why? Because... they didn't know what to do with him? Honestly, I can't explain why. Five's acerbic wit, his tendency to be one step ahead of the audience, his cockiness, the uncanny personality that is a quirk of being an old man trapped in a young man's body, his absolutely brutal and ruthless methods to protect his family, and his cool fight scenes, it all just vanishes. Suddenly, for the first time, he feels the age of the actor. He feels erased long before he literally is. After 3 seasons of him having one of the coolest powers that leads to some of the coolest scenes, we're suddenly in a world where everyone else has some useful version of their power, while Five's kind of sucks. And like his teleporting power only reappearing at the very end (spurred on to save Lila specifically, rather than his family, because ???), Five's personality is frequently missing. Which leads me to-

Five and Lila - This may be a controversial opinion, but in concept this could have worked. Am I mad at the idea that two characters who are stuck together for years with no one else as company might fall in love, even if they're an odd pairing? No. Like I said, it's okay in concept. But only in concept. In reality, there was neither the time, nor the necessary casting to make this storyline hit properly. Regardless of Five's character's age, or the fact that his actor is (technically) an adult now, this felt flat out wrong to watch. Not only does Five still very much look like a teenager (inevitable, as while Aidan has aged over the course of filming the show, the age of young Five would now, still, vastly outstrip his real age of 20), but we also know that Lila was introduced to him as a child. Lila and Five meet in season 2, in which he is (physically) still a 13 year old boy, while Lila is an adult woman (considering she has the same birthday as the rest of the Umbrella Academy, this would put her at approximately 30 years old at this time). Yes, the exact ages of these characters is a bit messy to track, but no amount of text on the screen telling me so many years have passed is going to allow me to forget this detail, which makes this whole situation, at best, deeply uncomfortable. The fifteen year age gap between the actors is incredibly evident, and this romance is ultimately completely unnecessary for them to evolve in the (frankly minimal) ways that they do. They also pretty brutally sacrificed Diego's character for this. All of Diego's negative traits are cranked up to 100 this season, while Lila's are generally turned down to a low simmer (until she nearly dooms everyone to a meaningless death). While I don't think their relationship being on the rocks, or either of their character's struggle to fit into domestic life, is a bad idea, I again find myself questioning what the point of this storyline was for this particular season. We don't get much of a conclusion. Diego is basically a buffoon all season, Lila is less blatantly fucked up most of the time and also somehow less likable for it, and Five feels out of place in this storyline. Why did we do this? As far as I can tell, it's because they didn't have any other ideas to keep these characters busy while the actual plot happens around them. That's really not a good reason to blow up a dysfunctional but well liked dynamic (Diego and Lila) and never even bother to mop up the blood. And that leads me to-

Lila - Just, in general, I found myself asking "who in the writer's room is ridiculously obsessed with Lila, because that is the only explanation for any of this." For example, Klaus names everybody's problems and can't think of any real issues for Lila?? LILA? Her erratic, risk taking behavior and serious mommy/family issues are the most intensely Lila thing about her?? This is what her entire character is built upon? Why are we acting like she's not been a complete wildcard for the last two seasons?? Her new power doesn't make any kind of sense. Everyone else basically got some version of their old power back (and we eventually learn that Lila does have that power back as well, despite wildly underusing it), but now she has laser eyes.... Because? Her inability to properly control the laser eyes is funny, but also doesn't make any sense. In previous seasons we see Lila quickly adapt to using new powers only moments after acquiring them. If there is any one single person in this whole show who should have adapted to a new power immediately, it would be Lila. And somehow, for some reason, they center Lila during the finale conflict. Everything rests on her decision to stay or go. On her connection to her family (despite us barely seeing her in a room with them all season), instead of literally any of the main Umbrellas we've been following all along. And she gets the last line of dialogue from our main characters. We spend an extended sequence watching The Umbrella Academy slowly sacrifice themselves and Lila gets the last word?? And all of this is coming from someone who actually really loved Lila in seasons 2 and 3. She was one of my favorite characters coming into this season, but this... It just felt blatantly disrespectful to all the other main characters.

Everyone Dying is a Bummer - Okay, don't get me wrong, I'm not set against tragic endings in general, but... I don't think The Umbrella Academy earned this ending (at least not in this way). This idea of the world being better off without them, like they are a mistake that fundamentally ruins the world and must choose to sacrifice themselves in the name of saving humanity, that would (could) be fine. Except that it doesn't feel thematically well supported by the previous seasons, or even just season 4. At its heart, seasons 1-3 followed the ups and downs of Five's journey to save his siblings from the apocalypse, even though they are the ones to cause it. This is his entire goal. He wavers, he actively tries to walk away from this, but he cannot help himself, he always comes back around to this goal. This is what we buy into in season 1. So the idea that this is impossible and that they all must die anyway, feels antithetical to why we are asked to care in the first place. We haven't been asked to care about the world (not in any tangible sense). We watch random, innocent people, or vaguely antagonistic people, get killed in horrible ways left and right in the show and we are not asked to care. We're often asked to laugh. We care about them saving the world because we care about them saving the family, this dysfunctional group of oddballs. Sure, on a very basic and fundamental level we don't want humanity to be wiped out, but the humanity of the surrounding world is never deeply touched upon in the show. And their death wipes out infinite universes. We're told this is "right," but we don't tie any real emotional stakes to it.

Season 4, which centers around saving (or failing to save) Ben and Jennifer, around Viktor's desire to find another way because he loves his brother (even this version of him) and his siblings have always fought so hard to find another way because they love Viktor, asks us to care for these same reasons. Not for the world, but because we care about these particular characters. And the writers decide to sideline Five, whose centering I believe is absolutely essential to pulling off a "they must all die at the end" storyline to begin with. Why? Because he's the one who has fought so hard to save them. To have him not be at the center of the storyline where saving them is not possible makes absolutely no sense. Do I think that a final season where we follow Five coming to the conclusion that they are all doomed could possibly work? Yeah, if they had (and here it is again) the time to dig into that story and show us how he grapples with and fights that resolution tooth and nail until he cannot anymore (they point at it with the diner scene, but don't have the time to let us feel the weight of it). But they don't do that. We don't get to follow him throughout a season trying to cope with this impossible truth. Instead, he accepts that fate in a matter of onscreen minutes and with immediate resignation. (Yes, you could argue this is what he has been doing the last 3 seasons, but we're never truly given the impression that he is trying to prevent an absolute inevitability, only that he is trying to prevent a specific reality). It undermines the foundation of his character, and because Five is the driving force of the first three seasons, it undermines the foundation of those storylines as well. With the limited amount of time they were given to wrap up this show, instead of ending with a "everyone must sacrifice themselves" storyline, I would have, instead, centered Five's personal journey in season 4, which concludes with him realizing there can be one universe in which his family can all live, but only if he dies. They live, but he must sacrifice himself and be erased from existence so they will never mourn him, never know him, never know to be grateful. What could be more fitting for the show, more simultaneously sad and happy, than Five achieving what he set out to do in 1x01 and saving his family and that costing him everything?

Now... how to work that in and fill in some major plot holes at the same time? Well, I have some ideas, but I'm gonna save them for a different post, because while writing this review, I found myself re-outlining season 4 and trying to fix some of nonsensical elements of this season and if I get into that, it needs its own post. But I think it could be done. And speaking of nonsensical events.... Why do the Umbrellas have to die now? Like, logistically speaking, if The Cleanse is a necessary event and every single other world except the "perfect" timeline ends in apocalypse, then why can't they jump on that subway to a different universe where they have more time to be really, truly sure that's the only answer? At the very least they would have had a chance to really say goodbye to each other. We know there are plenty of universes where Ben & Jennifer both exist, there's no reason it has to be now. Since there are infinite "wrong" universes, they have all the time in the world. This is not a decision that has to be made exclusively in this moment, despite being portrayed that way. They don't die, The Cleanse doesn't work, they fact check their solution in a different universe, they get a chance to say their goodbyes, etc. etc. The urgency makes no sense. For that matter, why doesn't Five blip them all down to the subway where the show has already established in this season that time does not pass, so they can have a real conversation about this? There is literally no reason not to do this. They, quite literally, have a character who can take them to a timeless limbo where they can take as much time as they want/need to sort this out. They, quite literally, have that character take an entire family to this place, proving that he is capable of bringing a group of people there, and they don't use it.

It Doesn't Get Better - One of the major themes of Umbrella Academy is dysfunctional family and the way we cope (or don't) with childhood trauma. How burying that pain is destructive and hurts the people around us. And while I don't think the show's intent was to send the ultimate message of, "Actually, it doesn't get better, you'll never heal those wounds, and your existence is a destructive mistake," that's... kind of what it implies anyway. Throughout the whole show we explore the ways these characters are trying to work through the abusive household they grew up in, to move past the things that happened to them, and we watch them process and come together as a family and stand up against their abuser and grow into better versions of themselves and lose their way and pick each other back up. And then we're told that it doesn't matter because they all have to die. It sends a strange message. Personally, I think the show may not ever have intended to really send a message at all. It's absurd and irreverent and tragic and silly. It has never shied away from violence. It's always had a bit of a flippant nihilism hanging about it. And I think there is an argument for "People don't always get what they deserve. Sometimes they just get the short end of the stick and it sucks, but that's just how it is," being an underlying theme worth exploring. It's just... they don't really explore it, they just kind of dump it on us at the end. And because we don't have time to come to terms with this messaging (time, it's all about time), I think a lot of people feel like there's this bait & switch happening. For the last 3 seasons, we've been watching a show that is constantly addressing this childhood trauma and a toxic family dynamic, but then the end of that show is like "and all of these kids are a casualty of their abuser's arrogance and there was literally, not from the moment they were born, anything they ever could have done to grow away from that." It's pretty fucking bleak, to say the least.

Plot Holes For Days - There are more plot holes in this show than a block of Swiss Cheese. There are so many, that I'm still mentally trying to sort out an ending that feels... somewhat in the spirit of what season 4 was intending, and doesn't leave us up to our eyeballs in nonsensical plot points. For example- in The Umbrella's original universe, they already changed things so that they don't exist anymore long before the apocalypse. One of the major plot points of season 3 is that Harlan accidentally killed The Umbrellas' mothers before they were even born (obviously this is a paradox, as Harlan could never do that without meeting Viktor). But Hargreeves was still able to adopt Marigold enhanced children! Marigold kids were still born! We're told in 1x01 that 43 women spontaneously gave birth without having been pregnant, but we're supposed to believe that The Umbrellas, right here and now, have definitely got all of the Marigold in this universe? (And that doesn't even get into the questions surrounding the Marigold's presence in this world, since The Umbrellas did not bring it with them, we see no sign of other super powered versions of them existing in this universe, but if it didn't already exist here in some capacity and no children were born with these powers, then there's nothing inherently wrong with this universe, meaning the apocalypse wouldn't need to happen, and on and on and on. Like if all the Marigold was just in that jar and that counts as being in this world, then they could have just chucked that thing at Jennifer and bam, problem solved.) We know that in the original timeline Hargreeves didn't adopt all the Marigold children, because that's the entire point of Lila's backstory. And what about the other 35 women who spontaneously gave birth and those kids? So how could The Umbrellas possibly know if they are destroying all the Marigold by sacrificing themselves in this world? They can't know that. The existence of The Sparrows (and in another universe The Phoenix Academy) also implies that there could be many universes where The Umbrella kids don't all even exist, but other children were born with their powers, so specifically The Umbrella kids all dying isn't something that would need to be set in stone, since none of the other Marigold kids had to die for The Cleanse to work in this universe. Now, a lot of shows have plot holes or paradoxes or questions left at the end, and a lot of shows I would cut some slack. I'm even willing to ignore a lot of the smaller plot holes in this show, but this is the culmination of the entire series, the explanation for what must happen and why, and the justification for all our main characters being wiped out, and it just doesn't hold up under more than a moment's scrutiny. And that, imo, is a pretty big problem.

Gene & Jean/Villains - So, on a slightly lighter note, another thing that I don't have a problem with in concept is Gene & Jean. They're weird and quirky, as all Umbrella Academy villains seem to be, and I love both actors. It's just that season 4 has a serious problem with its villains in general. That is, there are too many of them and their plans are too convoluted. The ultimate villains being in some way connected back to Hargreeves (and specifically Abigail, who up until this point has had very little to justify her existence in the show) makes sense to me. But the absolutely convoluted mess that is The Keepers cult led by Gene & Jean being at odds with Hargreeves' men who are hiding Jennifer, being at odds with Abigail masquerading as Sy Grossman and then as Gene (I still don't understand why she needed to kill Gene or Jean, like Gene & Jean were already trying to bring about The Cleanse, why is she infiltrating them??), instead of using her resources/position as Hargreeves' wife, is ridiculously messy. The person I watched this season with actually asked me after 4x04 if I had any idea what was happening because they were completely lost. Generally, I am pretty patient about how a show shares information. I always assume that I am picking up what they're putting down, and if I don't understand something, I will when I'm supposed to. That... didn't always feel like the case to me this season. I don't think it was so much that it was hard to follow, but that it just didn't make a lot of sense. The "why" for so many character actions, but particularly the villains, just never fully materializes. Abigail and Hargreeves' sides are fighting in this season, with him attempting to prevent the apocalypse and her trying to bring it about... But what is the justification for the completely convoluted nonsensical path it takes to get there? She seems to have plenty of power over Hargreeves when the kids visit. Why does she need to infiltrate The Keepers? Why do The Keepers need to exist at all? It's just a coincidence that they have the same goals as Abigail? If she actually started them, then I assume she would have installed herself into the organization and not needed Gene to infiltrate it. I don't understand her choices. There were many, many simpler ways to get where they ended up.

So... it's not as if The Umbrella Academy is the first show to do this ending. In fact, one of my favorite shows of all time does this ending (not mentioning it by name because that would be a massive spoiler, obviously). I think this ending is completely possible to pull off. But I also am neither convinced from an in-universe logical point, nor from a storyteller's point, that it earned this ending. Did I want it to be a happily ever after? No. I don't think that would fit tonally with the show. But I wanted it to feel necessary, truly inevitable, and both physically and thematically, I don't buy that it was.

My advice to anyone who was starting this show for the first time would have to be, "don't think too hard about it," because ultimately, if you do it will crumble. Just enjoy the vibes and the bickering and the comedy and strangeness. There's no point in asking too many questions. And for some people, that's totally okay. That's enough. I'm just (shockingly) not one of those people.

So, if you're still with me, I'd love to hear what you guys think. Did you feel emotionally fulfilled? Were there particular plot points you loved or hated? What was your favorite musical choice of season 4? Should I release my redesigned season 4 outline? What ending would you have chosen? I'm open to all opinions! I don't agree with all opinions, but I will very much consider them.

[youmaycallmebrian]

aight so i work in a daycare and have a very strong maternal (parental?) instinct which means my brain is tricked into liking kids and finding them cute and whatnot, which often leads me to wonder about how my favourite fictional characters would in turn react and behave around kids.

So i’m asking: how do you guys think Heimdall would act around kids/toddlers/babies? I’m not talking tween/teenagers like Atreus or Thrúd but like actual little tiny ones?

I was thinking about this the other day and my first instinct was to think he’d probably be the kind of person that unironically hates kids and call them “crotch goblins” or something lmao (which is valid af btw. i love that term) but honestly the more I think about it, the more I’m like... hold on a second... Usually what he hates about people is that “they never say what they mean” and they’re always so “predictable” and they always have like narcissistic intents behind everything they do. But like, you know what kind of people always say what they mean and have basically no filter and generally just run on pure fucking instinct? TODDLERS.

Like, as much as I would accept a hc that claims he just dislikes being around kids in general, I would also totally believe an hc that claims it’s one of the few types of people he can actually enjoy spending time with. I know how this sounds but pls bear with me lol. Idk there’s such an unhinged authenticity and “rawness” and simple-mindedness in toddlers, and as annoying as it can be sometimes, I feel like it can also be kind of very “needed” and eye-opening in certain times? And idk I feel like it would be very possible for Heimdall to see that and take advantage of it.

Like idk I can picture him pretty well being annoyed af at the idea of babysitting a toddler nephew or niece but then after a while being like “u know what? this is actually kinda fun. I am being cognitively challenged rn”

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

To mod: Rank the designs of the Persona 5 party personas including Arsene and the ultimate personas! (Please?)

//Sure! I honestly really wanted to do this but I didn't know how I could. But since we've been talking about Persona a lot here, I guess this is good.

//I promise I will prioritize Danganronpa content though for those who are concerned, it's just nice to take a break from the norm every once in a while.

//So here it is, from worst to best:

#33: Prometheus It's just a ball with weird patterns on it. I'm not even sure what it's supposed to represent. Is it like, a moon or a planet or something? It's just a weird "upgrade" from Futaba's initial Persona.

#32: Pithos Similarly, Pithos is just a bunch of boxes. Interesting and unique on it's own, but still weird.

#31: Pandora Sorry, but Pandora just looks really stupid to me. I do think it's somewhat cool in how it evolves from Pithos, but the curvy body looks really weird with the blocky head and wings. The awakening scene was great though.

#30: Zorro He looks goofy, though I think that's the point, since he's Morgana's initial Persona. The other two that he gets look SO much better though.

#29: Seiten Taisei A bit of a strange change from Captain Kidd and honestly a bit of a downgrade. And Ryuji wonders why everyone calls him a vulgar ape, lol.

#28: Al Azif Definitely an upgrade from Prometheus, since it actually has a cool design, and I do like it, but I still can't say that it's better than Futaba's initial Persona.

#27: Necronomicon Speaking of...Futaba's best Persona is easily her initial one, but she still falls short of every other design. Don't get me wrong, I like it a lot, but I feel like she just gets the most out-of-pocket designs and it doesn't get much better as she progresses. It's still cool though.

#26: Agnes Agnes is definitely pretty awesome, but I also feel like it's design is a little TOO extra. Plus, given how much I loved Anat's transformer gimmick, I was sad to see Makoto lose that.

#25: Satanael It pains me to rank this beast so low, but I'm not taking Satanael's pure scale into account, because he retains it for the fight against the God of Control and nowhere else. If I was, he'd be higher. He's still raw af, but compared to Joker's other two Persona's, I think he's the weakest.

#24: Ella Ella is basically just Cendrillon but super pale and luminescent, and wearing a wedding dress; and I honestly don't like it as much as the other two forms her power takes. This was a tough one to rank though because I definitely like it, despite all that.

#23: Goemon Goemon's design honestly is pretty silly looking, especially with the weird curvy jaw and pompadour, but for some reason, I really like it. I think Yusuke's initial awakening may play a part though, and I did get attached to Goemon throughout my playthrough's.

#22: Loki Honestly, with how much I like Akechi, I was expecting to put Loki higher, but then I realized that of his three known Persona's, it's probably his most simple in terms of design. Definitely fitting for his character, and definitely super cool in it's own right, but as Ann points out in the Thieves Den, it kind of looks like Loki from the Marvel Comics got fused with a Zebra.

#21: Diego Yeah, maybe it looks a bit more extra, but I think in this case, it works. It adds a lot that Zorro's initial design was missing, and I really like the change of colour. That said, it's still only Morgana's second best Persona.

#20: Carmen I never quite realized just how much I love Ann's Persona's. All three of them have super unique designs that share similar themes, but also don't copy too much from one another. Carmen is the worst of the three in my opinion, but she's still a total stand-out.

#19: Captain Kidd Again, expected this one to be higher, because Captain Kidd is definitely among my top picks for initial Persona's, and he was easily my favourite of the initial party members.

#18: William Though I hate it's name, because it just sounds super weird for Ryuji to have a Persona with such a proper name, William is the rawest design that he has under his belt. I don't know what it is, but taking the skeletal aspects of Captain Kidd and turning them into a real modern punk is interesting and cool to me.

#17: Milady Milady gets points for not only being just a really cool designed Persona compared to a lot of the initial roster, but also the machine guns hidden in the dress thing will never get old for me.

#16: Astarte Initially, I had Astarte underneath Milady because it loses the gun dress when evolving; but then I realized that Astarte's design is just hella cool on it's own, and I really REALLY like the imagery and proportions of it, as strange as they are.

#15: Lucy Hey! All three of Haru's Persona's next to each other! With Lucy though, I really just think that's is a better Milady. Yeah, it's not as colourful, but it definitely has a more "Phantom-esque" look to her now. Plus, she gets the gun dress back, so that's a bonus.

#14: Mercurius My biggest issue with Mercurius is that we only get to see him in action for what is basically the final dungeon of the base game. And even in Royal, he gets replaced by Diego almost immediately after, so unless you have Mona in your party for the fight against Cendrillon, Yaldabaoth is basically the only time you get to see him in action. Which is a shame because he's EASILY Morgana's best Persona design, and one of the best in the game.

#13: Arsene To this day, Arsene is still the best starting Persona that any of the Persona protags have gotten, and I really REALLY wish he was stronger by default, and that there was a benefit to having him around for more than a few levels.

#12: Valjean The one Persona that Zenkichi has is able to stand out amongst the best; and his super raw awakening really helps with this. The origin story is fascinating, especially in the way it matches Zenkichi's own situation, and it's a damn near perfect specimen to represent the old man's sense of justice.

#11: Cendrillon First time I saw this design, I freaked out because I thought it was gorgeous. And I like that in a few ways, it mirrors the colours of Arsene while also having Sumire's own little aspects to it. Plus, the whole concept of it representing the side of Kasumi that Sumire aspires to be is a very unique way to create a Persona.

#10: Johanna I HAD to put the bike in the top 10, especially since it's one of the things that made me fall for Makoto so hard originally. It is EASILY the most unique concept that a Persona has done EVER, and the fact that it went to the super prim and proper student council president of all people was so funny to me.

#9: Gorokichi Again, it's design is ridiculous, but the flashy colours and more standing-straight figure really does a good job at showing what the Stage 3 Persona's are supposed to be - the true power of the user. And Gorokichi is about as "Yusuke" as you can get.

#8: Vanadis Vanadis is Sumire's best Persona because it's such a far cry from what you expect, and it represents a lot more to her than you see on the surface. The colours mimic Arsene a lot, at least from my perspective, and the fact that it's predominantly black and red symbolizes what could be a hidden rage and a burning passion, which we have seen Sumire show on only rare occasions.

#7: Celestine Celestine rocks the exact kind of punk-girl drip that I live for, and the fact that it drops all of the mythical and mysterious crap that Carmen and Hecate had, to show off Ann's true self, is fantastic. Of all the third tier Persona's, it's probably the best one to show off the user's true, unhidden strength, besides Gorokichi at least.

#6: Kamu Susano-o Though Gorokichi means a lot more to me, Kamu Susano-o exudes an aura of power, destruction and anarchy that few of the party Persona's are able to match. With the third tier Persona's all being gods of some shape or form, this one is by far the most godly-looking.

#5: Robin Hood I don't know why it is I'm so attached to Robin Hood, but I think it may be it goes against every preconception of how Robin Hood in mythology should look; as well as how well it fits with Akechi's princely facade and, in his own words, how it serves as his conception of a man who sticks to his justice.

#4: Raoul Yes, we're counting Raoul, because he's got way too much swagger to overlook. Being what is technically Joker's Tier 3 Persona, he, like the others, really works with just showing off, from appearance alone, just how cool Joker really is. You take one look at that fedora-wearing, metallic-winged demon, and you know you're in good hands.

#3: Hecate Hecate's design is fire as fuck (pun not intended) and there's not much else I can say about it, other than the pure savagery it exudes. It makes me glad that this is the design that I spent most of the game with, with Ann being one of the earliest unlockable party confidants and one of the easiest completed, because as much as I love Celestine and Carmen, this one just oozes style.

#2: Hereward Hereward is the perfect fusion of Robin Hood and Loki, and is the best Tier 3 Persona in the game. Again, it suffers from the same issue as Mercurius, because not only do you have to pick a very specific set of dialogue options for Akechi to even UNLOCK it, but you can only do so at the FINAL BATTLE and nowhere else. But it's absolutely worth it because this dark hero is the perfect representation of my favourite character in the game.

#1: Anat. Again, like I said before, the transformer aspect is EVERYTHING to me. The animations are clean, the design is sleek, the origin is awesome, and to top it all off, my already favourite girl gets this. I was wondering initially how the game was going to top the motorcycle, and I was not disappointed when I saw how. Hands down my top pick, even though Hereward is a very close second.

-Mod

[vividracing]

New Post has been published on https://www.vividracing.com/blog/top-5-best-tacoma-engine-mods-that-arent-a-supercharger/

Top 5 Best Tacoma Engine Mods - That Aren't A Supercharger!

There’s no easier way to communicate your love of adventure than owning a Toyota Tacoma. This midsize pickup truck is one of the most well-built and capable rides out there. If you are in the market to add more power to your Tacoma, you should know that there are more affordable ways to get more power from your engine without adding a supercharger. In this article, we are going to share the top 5 upgrades you can do that will help you to get more power and performance from your Tacoma without supercharging.

1. Throttle Body

While the 4.0L and 3.5L V6 engines in Toyota 4Runners, Tacomas, and FJs are undoubtedly reliable, they lack the desired punch in terms of raw power. These vehicles, known for their off-road capabilities and versatility, are often heavily modified with larger tires, and loaded with gear. An easy upgrade that is worth every penny is an upgraded Throttle Body. The stock throttle body on the 3rd Gen Tacoma is 70mm. This can reasonably be enlarged to a 76mm bore allowing for much more airflow. This will result in more power and responsiveness from your V6 power plant. One that we recommend and is a staff favorite is the aFe Power 76mm Throttle Body. We love this option because it’s simply plug-and-play, just how it should be! AFE includes all the hardware needed with simple installation instructions.

76mm Bore Diameter, No Tuning Required

Plug-n-play Electronics

Billet Aluminum Adapter

More Power and Better Throttle Response

Hardware and Gasket Included

Direct Bolt-On For Simple Installation

2. CSF High-Performance Radiator Toyota Tacoma 2005-2021

Even though the Tacoma is well-built, the one hindrance to its greatness quite limiting is the lacking a factory-provided radiator. This performance radiator by CSF increases heat dissipation by approximately 15% and also maximizes airflow. It was designed to withstand any offroading conditions, on top of it being easy to install with no modifications needed.

3. RIPP Superchargers High-Performance Coil Packs Toyota Tacoma 3.5L V6 2016-2021

A coil pack is like a large capacitor that generates spark energy for each individual spark plug during each engine revolution. It is a great way to improve performance and gas mileage. On top of that it is really affordable for the performance. Compared to stock coil packs, the RIPP High-Performance Coils are totally redesigned and re-engineered to add up to 44% more power which translates to better MPG, more responsive throttle input, and an overall better driving experience when installed.

4. Pedal Commander Performance Throttle Controller 38 BT Toyota

A throttle controller removes response delays on your electronic accelerator pedal, and in turn, it allows your engine to respond faster. With this Pedal Commander Performance Throttle Controller, your car can accelerate faster. Pedal Commander is programmable according to your desire within your car’s specifications. With their app and BlueTooth feature it can be easier to control all of the functions directly from your phone.

5. AWE Dual Diamond Black Tips 0FG Exhaust w/ BashGuard Toyota 3rd Gen Tacoma 2016-2023

The last upgrade you can do to get more power from your Tacoma is this AWE Exhaust. This system gives you full-bodied aggression and the best sound on the road. Once installed you will unlock a superior soundtrack and optimal flow compared to the stock system. The system is available with two tip options including Diamond Black and Chrome Silver tips, and the tip outlets, although conjoined, offer vertical adjustability, and the tips themselves are individually adjustable allowing depth into the bumper to be set according to personal taste.

If you have any questions or you would love to buy products that improve your Toyota Tacoma, please do not hesitate to contact us. You can reach us by phone at 1-480-966-3040 or via email at sales@vividracing.com.

[lepusrufus]

To bargain for immortality pt.1

It's here fellas, the mutation sequel that I've mercilessly teased you with!

Content warnings: gore, torture, blood (like... lots), just a bunch of puking up blood, Miranda being her usual mad scientist self, torture in the name of science, Nicole be sick af (both literally and of crow mommy's bullshit), a little bit of blood drinking as a treat, medical procedures.

////

Tic toc tic toc

God that clock is so annoying.

Nicole wasn’t nervous. No. She chose this, at least for the most part. She had a long conversation with all her family, Alcina and Esteria both assuring her that it would work. It’s been years since the beginning of the experiments and by this point the process was almost perfected.

Miranda knew what she was doing.

That mattered little to her nerves though.

She instinctively pushed herself further into Cassandra’s side, who’s grip around her waist tightened ever so slightly.

The waiting was downright tortuous.

She, along with Cassandra and her two sisters were in her infirmary. The room mixed the ancient decor of the castle with modern medical equipment in a beautiful way. Not that anything less would be acceptable. Not that the familiarity of her workspace brought her any comfort either.

All their eyes snapped in the direction of the door when a heavy set of footsteps, with two lighter ones, were heard down the hallway outside. Soon the door opened with a barely audible creak and the two matriarchs entered, followed suit by Mother Miranda. Her presence alone was enough to make Nicole’s breath get lost somewhere in her throat, on its way to an exhale. The black wings, even partially folded as they were, did their job of making her look so much more intimidating than she was. Not that she needed them to begin with, a look from those icy gray eyes more than enough to send anyone to their knees.

Mother Miranda was, in all ways that mattered, a goddess.

A goddess that was about to infect her with the same thing that failed countless times in the past. The same thing that made the crawling mindless beasts used as guard dogs in the undergrounds. Or that made all the lycans.

Nicole gulped, a gesture gone thankfully unnoticed to anyone other than her painfully dry mouth.

But Miranda didn’t spare her a glance. She simply busied herself with some tools she had brought on one of the metal tables. With each clink the room seemed to close in on her slightly more, until Nicole felt as if she somehow ended up in one of Heisenberg's death traps. Spikes moving closer and closer until they would pierce her body and leave her in a messy pool of blood and entrails.

She shook her head and took a long inhale. No. This was going to work. She was not about to lose her family over a pesky thing such as mortality. She was not about to lose Cassandra. If getting infected by the Cadou was what it took to spend eternity with her lover then so be it. Possible side effects be damned.

Mother Miranda finally seemed to have finished, a now empty flask labeled Cadou sitting on the desk behind her while the parasite was writhing in her hand, thin whip-like tentacles extending frantically around itself. She called her over with a nod, and with a deep breath and a parting hand squeeze from Cassandra, Nicole forced her legs to take her across the room. Her steps didn't waver, she'd be damned if she'd show any hesitancy in front of this.

"Shall we begin."

It wasn't a question really, merely veiled impatience. Miranda did not like her, plain and simple. The fact that she was there to begin with was already a miracle. Miracle that wouldn't have happened were it not for the Ladies themselves asking for it.

"Yes of c-"

Before her words even had time to completely slip out of her mouth, golden talons plunged into the base of her sternum.

"Hopefully this can teach you that I don't like people going behind my back."

Nicole let out a choked gasp, hands instinctively wrapping around Miranda's arm, weakly grabbing at black robes. Ironically enough, those very talons were keeping her upright and, when they were removed from her flesh with a disgusting squelch of blood, Nicole curled in on herself, falling to her knees.

"Wha-... cking ki-... -er!"

Cassandra's voice reached her ears broken up, barely passing through the deafening ringing. Miranda also gave a reply and then seemed to address someone else but her much calmer tone meant that it only sounded like a vague mumble.

Not that Nicole particularly cared at the moment.

She curled into a ball, her hands almost clawing at her chest trying to find some sort of relief. It seemed as if vicious tendrils were making their way into every vein and muscle, tearing their way through any tissue they found. Her chest felt as if it had a hot iron pressed directly onto the skin, searing pain radiating in a cruel pulse matching her frantic heartbeat. By that point she was either sobbing or heaving, something that involved shallow breaths for sure. Her lungs were protesting fiercely, emptying of oxygen and then refusing to refill if not with great strain.

To make everything worse, the pain seemed to shift, now engulfing her spine and sending jolts that made her head spin and want to throw up despite her jaws being clenched shut so tightly that she was sure she'd start to taste copper soon.

She was only vaguely aware of hands shifting her body and soothing words that fell on deaf ears. She was now on a softer surface, but that did nothing to alleviate the assault on each of her senses. Probably she had thrown up at a certain point as her sinuses felt like being scraped by sandpaper with each shuddering breath. Her mouth too had a lingering taste of both bile and blood that made her stomach turn all over again. She would give anything for her body to finally shut down.

Why was she still awake and conscious god damn it. There was only so much her body was supposed to take before the brain shut down and she was reaching her limit of how much agony she could endure at a moment.

Please please please just pass out please.

She didn't though. Her body seemingly deciding to feel every single bit of the infection process, complete with the unending waves of pain and nausea that hit her more than she wanted to count. Any bit of sanity left in her would've probably disappeared had she tried.

---

It took two days for the agonizing pain to subside. Another two for Nicole to be able to form any kind of coherent sentence. Cassandra's soothing voice was of immense comfort, always there to tell her how well she was doing and how it would all be better soon.

God she hoped.

On the fifth day, her stomach still lurched at any movement too sudden. Her lungs seemed to fill with blood, courtesy of the still gaping wound at the bottom of her sternum, with any inhale too deep. The fact that she got used to the coppery taste rising up in her throat was disgusting in and of itself. At least there weren't jolts of pain shooting through every nerve and muscle in waves anymore though. That was something.

The fog in her brain was still clearing. It was hard to focus on anything, and each time Cassandra, or anyone else, asked her a question they would have to repeat it at least three times. It was beyond frustrating, the mind that got her through med school drunk half the time was failing the insurmountable task of saying whether or not she'd like some water. Glorious.

A faint knock on the door reached her ears. A redundant gesture really, as she didn't exactly have the clarity of mind to answer. Besides it was hard to catch her in a more compromising state than curled up in the fetal position, covered in sweat and most likely blood clots stuck to her lips.

Esteria came in, her one blue eye that wasn't covered looking at her with all the gentleness neither of her parents had ever offered her. Or it was just the cruel trick of a delirious brain. Either way, light barefoot steps took the Mistress to her bed. She sat in the chair adjacent to it and, with taloned fingers brushing strands of auburn hair out of Nicole's face, she spoke softly.

"How are you feeling today?"

Her voice was just as melodious as ever. It was the voice one imagines they would hear from an ancient being found deep in the forest. It made Nicole just a tad guilty when the only answer she could give was a pathetic whine.

Esteria simply hummed, talons running through the long messy locks of hair sprawled on the sheets.

"Would you like me to braid this for you dear?"

Nicole frowned. The Mistress was an expert at braiding, quick fingers able to make beautiful designs, both simple and complex. Comes with having floor length hair, her hazy mind guessed. On any normal day, Nicole would've accepted without a second thought. But now? Now she was painfully aware of the state she was currently in.

"It's filthy," she croaked, her voice raw and like stones in her mouth.

And it was. Her hair was waist length and right now it was slowly becoming a curse. It was greasy and sweaty thanks to barely being able to move a limb for nearly a week, which meant no showers. Not to mention how she lost count of the times she bent down to empty the contents of her stomach into a bucket, only to have some rebel locks fall in her face and get subsequently dirty. God she felt awful.

Esteria didn't seem to care too much though, as she simply helped Nicole shift slightly and talons started to work at some pesky mats. In no time, her hair was in a comfortable braid that started relatively high, keeping the locks away from her nape which meant just a tad less overheating. Not to mention it kept it in place and away from her mouth that she didn't trust in the slightest right now.

"Thanks," she actually managed to not let her voice crack this time.

"Oh it's no problem. Also," there seemed to be an odd strain in her voice, "Mother Miranda is coming this evening. She said something about an examination."

Nicole couldn't help but openly wince and curl in on herself a little more at the mere mention of the woman. Her chest seemed to pulsate painfully at the memory of the golden talons embedded deep in her flesh. Right now she wanted those hands anywhere away from her.

"What time is it?"

Esteria looked at the clock placed somewhere on the wall behind them. "About twelve. Still got time."

How hard would it be to drag herself to the adjacent bathroom for a quick shower? The only way her situation could get worse was if none other than Mother Miranda came in to see her in that state. She took a deep breath that her lungs protested against and pushed herself onto her elbows. At Esteria's skeptical expression she tried to sound less horrible than she felt.

"I need a shower."

Esteria pursed her lips. "Sorry dear but I don't believe for one second that you can stand for more than a minute. I'll ask a maid to draw you a bath."

Nicole only nodded weakly and let herself fall back into the cushion.

---

It took far longer than Nicole would ever admit to get herself fully clean. Her muscles were sore and protesting at every pass of the soapy sponge. Her hair was a whole other battle and she had to bite down on her pride and ask the maid positioned outside her door for help. It was a tortuous fifteen minutes until the poor girl managed to detangle the long locks enough to be shampooed and washed.

After she was content with the level of cleanliness of her body and the maid was dismissed, she stood there preparing herself to get out of the basin. In the meantime she looked down at the wound at the bottom of her sternum. Maybe wound wasn't the right word. It looked more like a gray and black scar with vein-like tendrils spreading across pale skin. It looked downright gruesome. Miranda really did not try to do a clean job in the slightest. Didn't even think to use anesthesia, like she had with most other experiments, according to Alcina.

She sighed and finally pushed herself out of the water with shaky arms.

By the time Mother Miranda arrived she was feeling slightly better. Why she came personally was still a mystery to Nicole. Maybe some sick sense of satisfaction in seeing her in pain.

Either way, by the time their so-called goddess came into the infirmary and told Nicole to lay down on one of the tables, she managed to shuffle her way over without her body protesting too much. Cassandra also quietly made her way on the opposite side of Miranda, gaining herself a glare.

"Must you hover over her like that?" Miranda's tone was as even as ever, but her eyes betrayed annoyance.

"Does it hinder you?"

Cassandra was not an idiot, the growl she wanted to add into her question was instead replaced by a tone not too dissimilar to Miranda's own, who simply tugged her lips into a grimace.

"Very well."

At first they went through a normal examination. Pupil dilation, reflexes, all things a normal doctor would do. Then Miranda told her to unbutton her blouse so she could take a look at the infection scar.

Nicole couldn't help flinching when thankfully gloved fingers would poke and prod at the sensitive flesh there. Her cold digits felt like hot coals were spread on her chest and nails dragged uselessly on the metal underneath her body for some sort of distraction.

Mother Miranda decided to get a tissue sample and that's when Nicole decided that maybe she would rather spend eternity as a ghost. She squeezed her eyes shut when a scalpel was brought to the overly sensitive skin. It took her back to when she would do autopsies, years ago. Tissue samples were always an integral part of her work. How ironic that she found herself on the other side of things.

It's fine.

She winced when the blade cut into flesh and sent a jolt of pain through her chest. Nicole couldn't help but think of the long days she spent agonizing while her chest felt like it was burning her alive and hoping that it wouldn't repeat. A sigh of pure relief slipped past her lips when whatever fake deity there was besides this woman, listened to her and the sensation died out quickly. She dared to open her eyes, only to see Mother Miranda frowning down at the small vial in hand.

It was quickly given to an assistant and she unceremoniously grabbed Nicole's wrist, dragging the blade across the length of her forearm.

Nicole gasped at the sudden sharp pain, and even Cassandra dropped a few choice words in romanian due to the surprise. No. No no no. What the hell-

Any questions, or less dignified reaction, died in everyone's throats as they watched the skin stitch itself back together. The repairing muscles gave a tingling sensation but soon the only proof that a cut had been there were thin trails of blood.

Mother Miranda chuckled and wrote down something in the notebook she brought with her. "Accelerated healing. That can be of use."

Nicole couldn't help but throw a glance at Alcina, who was sitting in one of the many chairs with Esteria by her side. Her expression was unreadable, a mix of conflicting emotions flashing in her eyes like rapid lightning. She would've tried to decipher their matriarch's probable thoughts were it not for the smell that was starting to assault her senses.

"Ugh what's that…blood… "

Coherent sentences were still not something her brain wanted to do apparently, but judging by how her nose scrunched up in a grimace, Cassandra got the gist of what she meant.

"Um… your arm," she pointed to the still fresh blood slowly dripping from her skin.

Right. Dumbass.

"Or damaged sinuses. Should go away soon," Miranda added from where she was noting something down and giving instructions to her assistant.

Also fair.

She sighed and tried to ignore it. Her sinuses still felt like sandpaper all the way to the back of her throat. Every time she swallowed, it felt like needles scraping the inside of her neck down to her stomach.

Ugh.

Thankfully, Mother Miranda did not linger for much longer. She wrapped up any samples and was out of the room soon after with her assistant in tow. Then, Nicole could finally go back to laying down in bed and feeling miserable.

And miserable she felt. Her body seemed to have decided to rewire itself into its new mutation. It didn't have any effect on her physical appearance, but the insides seemed to want to liquefy only to be mended back together. It was another week of basically living with a bucket in her lap and throwing up blood clots that seemed to invade her lungs and organs. How she didn't straight up asphyxiate was a mystery that she didn't think she wanted solved.

And to top it off, she was starting to think that humidity from some leaky pipe somewhere in the castle was causing a slight mold problem. Almost everywhere she went, there was this faint moldy scent lingering in the air and it was mixing horribly with the coppery feeling inside her still offended throat and sinuses. Nobody seemed bothered by it though, so maybe it was simply a side effect of the infection that was yet to go away. It wasn’t nicknamed the Mold for nothing, after all.

[0097linersb]

Pink Lemonade

CHAPTER 1

Pairings: Jaemin x Renjun x Haechan x Jeno x Mark x Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Humor (I guess), Slow burn af

Summary: The dreamies decide to spend some weeks at an Inn in the middle of the nature to relax and enjoy some outdoor adventures, far away from their crazy idol life. What they didn’t expect was the nice girl running said Inn.

Word count: 3k

You should read the intro first so this story makes sense <3

☼  previous / next  ☼

A/N: Honestly guys this fic will probably be long and detaild af ‘cause I’m using it as a distraction from real life lol guess who just finished their engagement. If u would like it to be more straightforward and go right to the fun parts let me know, I’d really like some opinions! Also, it’s like 2 AM so I’ll proofread it tomorrow 

As you woke up the next day, you were not shocked to find that the boys were not up yet. Last night you were surprised to come downstairs to an already fully cleaned kitchen and as much as it made you embarrassed, it also made you immensely grateful. You thanked them and told them to stop being so nice and doing your job for you, to which Mark only responded that seven guys could be really messy sometimes.

You had given them the folders that informed all the activities the Inn (well, you) offered and the ones they could book in the city a few minutes away, it made you smile at how excited they got reading the paper and planning their days. Haechan was already asking if they could go stargazing that same night but the rest of them groaned saying they were way too tired to move after the long trip (and you felt bad once again for having them clean the kitchen).

Everyone eventually agreed on a time for breakfast and you were just sure they wouldn’t wake up that early by the dark circles under their eyes and, turns out you were right. They did go to sleep pretty early the other night, showering after the meal you had and just going straight to bed.

You lazily stretched as you left your room with Koda and Kenai tracing after you, to find a very much awake Jaemin sitting on the living room’s couch holding a cup.

“Good morning, did you make coffee?” You yawned at the boy, scolding Koda so he would get off the couch.

“Good morning. Yeah, sorry for taking the liberty, I really needed to wake up,” He smiled at you, petting your disobedient dog with his free hand so he could get distracted from the way your shirt had ridden up. Damn morning horniness.

“It’s ok, smells good. Are the rest of the boys awake?”

“Nop, and probably won’t be for a while. I know we agreed on going to the lake at 8 but everyone’s dead, I can wake them up if-“

“No, it’s ok,” You laughed. “I imagined this would happen, not a fan of waking up early myself.”

“Oh, you can go back to sleep if you want, I can knock when everyone starts waking up.”

“Don’t worry. You just really made me want some coffee.”

“I left it downstairs, I can go get you a cup.”

“Jaemin, we’re playing opposites here, don’t make me feel useless,” You joked, already making your way to the stairs, missing how the man stared at your legs in your little pajama shorts. “Plus, I need to take the boys on a walk before they become too fidgety.”

“Can I come with?”

“Of course.”

Jaemin was quick to stand up and follow you downstairs, where you quickly poured yourself a cup of coffee and opened the door, the dogs running past you excitedly. You silently lead the way out of your property and into the unpaved road, warming your hands with the coffee mug – The days were hot but the nights and early mornings could be quite chilly, especially with all the trees surrounding you and blocking the sunshine from reaching you.

“Do they sleep with you?” Jaemin asked, pointing at the dogs who were sniffing around the bushes on the side of the road, like they didn’t do this same route every day.

“Sometimes, they often prefer to stay outside, lots of animals to chase when I’m not there to scream at them.”

“They don’t wear leashes?”

“No need to, there’s barely people here and they are really well-behaved. I trained them well, Koda just gets a little bold when we have new guests over,” You smiled, remembering not even 5 minutes ago said dog was trying to get on Jaemin’s lap on the couch. “Do you like tangerines?”

The boy looked at you confused but nodded.

“Wait a second,” You asked before leaving him, walking off the road and into the trees. After a minute or so, you were back, throwing one of the orange fruits at Jaemin. “I steal them from the neighbors sometimes.”

“Will we get in trouble?” He asked but was already peeling the tangerine with his hands.

“Nah, they are never here. These would just rot.”

“Seems only fair then.”

You walked for another few minutes in silence, eating happily as you appreciated the sound of your feet crushing the small rocks on the floor.

“Ok, tangerines do not go well with coffee,” You make a face after eating half of your fruit, only now stopping to pay attention to the actual taste in your mouth.

Jaemin laughs at you before putting his last slice into his mouth, “Cute.”

“There’s nothing cute about this flavor.”

“Didn’t bother me,” He shrugged, smiling down at you.

Damn that boy was too attractive for his own good. You meant, all of them were.

It was just unfair, really.

The two of you talked a bit more until you hit the end of the road and then made your way back, it was a light-hearted comfortable conversation and you liked the way it made you feel warm inside. You learnt that Jaemin likes to photograph stuff and you asked him to take lots of pictures during their stay so you could use them on the Inn’s social media, telling him you shared that hobby with him. You then started a discussion about digital vs. film photography, in which you two clearly didn’t agree on, but it kept you entertained for a long time.

“Listen, technology evolved to this point to make life comfortable and easier for a reason!” Jaemin whined as you two were entering your property once again. “Is there something worse than developing your pictures only to find out your film was ruined?”

“That’s the thrill of it!” You exasperated.

“I call that heartbreak.”

“It’s a raw form of art for the strong hearted,” You sigh dramatically, opening the door for the man.

After your half an hour walk, as you got back home, only Renjun was up, pouring himself some coffee and looking super sleepy.

“Good morning, slept well?” You asked as Jaemin made his way to sit down on the table after getting Renjun to pour him some more coffee.

“Yeah, this is the first time I dreamt in months,” He smiled at you but his eyes were still half closed. Like you, Renjun was still in his pajamas, light sweatpants and a wrinkled white t-shirt.

“Do you guys want to eat something before breakfast?” You asked, not knowing how long they would have to wait for the others.

“It’s ok,” Jaemin answered.

“If you change your mind just let me know,” You smiled, wondering on what to do now, since you had already prepared the food for today last night and didn’t have any other chores until everyone was up so you could make their beds.

You figured the boys would drink their coffees and go talk or lay down in the hammocks, maybe even try to nap a bit but you were proven wrong when Renjun pointed at the end of the table suddenly excited, “Are those cards?”

“Yeah.”

“Can we play?”

“Of course.”

The man was quick to pick up the little box and sit down across the table from Jaemin, who tapped the place next to him before you had the chance to leave. You happily took on the offer, content with finally spending some fun time with people your age. No, scratch that: Attractive men your age.

“Let’s play Rummy!” Renjun suggested, the sleepiness leaving his body at the simple thought.

“I have no idea how to play that,” You informed.

“It’s ok, I’ll teach you. Come closer,” Jaemin smiled at you and you obeyed, heart beating fast at your thighs suddenly touching. What were you? 12?

The game was way too complicated for your morning brain to understand so you basically just watched the boys play, giving your input here and there.

“Jaemin, here!” You excitedly pointed at one of the cards he was holding.

“Oh, I had missed that, smart girl,” He smiled at you, patting your thigh as a thank you or maybe a praise, making your heart almost leave your body through your mouth. 

Freaking pet names dude.

After an hour or so playing, Jeno and Haechan appeared already fully clothed and awake. The second boy gave you and Jaemin a weird look, noticing how the boy’s right hand was just casually resting on your thigh. At some point it just happened and it felt comfortable (if you ignored your blood pumping through your body twice the normal speed, of course), it had been months since you had flirted with someone and you were enjoying the touch fully, thoughts of being professional nowhere to be found.

You greeted the boys and they sat down too, informing Mark and Chenle would be down in a second and Jisung would just skip breakfast to sleep. You decided then to get up and leave them to chat as you went into the pantry to organize the food you had prepared yesterday, into the baskets.

“Dude,” Haechan whispered to Jaemin.

Just by looking at the boy, Jaemin already knew what he wanted to comment on so he just, “Don’t.”

“Game on, bro.”

“What? This is not a game, we were just-“

“I said game on, bro.”

Jaemin sighed and gave up, knowing Haechan was just joking and being annoying as usual.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After all the men (minus Jisung) were downstairs and ready to go, you guided them down to the lake, setting up one of those cliché plaid towels for everyone to sit on. As you and Mark organized the foods around, you smiled at the others running around the grass and taking pictures, impressed at the view. The lake really was pretty and your property had a privileged clearing to sit down and enjoy it.  

“I would love to say they are normally not this energetic,” Mark smiled at you, placing the bowl with the grapes and strawberries down. “But I’d be lying.”

“It’s refreshing, I rarely deal with people my age around here. We didn’t add bingo to the activities’ folder for no reason.”

“There are no clubs or bars around here?”

“The biggest city around has barely 2.000 habitants so I’ll say no to that. Although this region is becoming really famous for the ecotourism these days, they opened a nice pub for the tourists like last month but there’s only ever people during the weekends.”

“Well, if you ever go to Seoul, let me take you out,” Mark offered before realizing what he had said and stiffening, cheeks going red like the watermelon juice in your hands. “I mean, like, to show you the places and-“

“That sounds fun,” You smiled at him, deciding to end his misery right from the start. He was cute. “Boys, the food is ready.”

Jeno excitedly dropped Haechan down (who he was holding for a picture) and ran over, leaving a very whiny boy on the floor. Jaemin took a picture of that and soon enough, everyone was sitting down on the picnic clot.

“Wow, it looks like we’re in a movie,” Renjun awed, looking around.

It really did, that’s why you liked bringing the guests to this spot on their first day. After everything was set, the scenery resembled a Renaissance painting and you loved it. It was a bit hotter than normally since it was a few hours later then the time the guests usually have breakfast, but the gentle breeze of the wind was enough to not make it unbearable.  

The meal was fun, the boys made you feel so comfortable that it felt like you have known each other for a longer time than the actual truth. You all chatted, joked around and posed for pictures with the food. You had brought your analog camera just to tease Jaemin, asking him to take a picture with it for you.

“How do you want it?” The boy groaned, pretending to be annoyed.

“Here, I have an idea,” Haechan shared, excitedly, holding up one of the strawberries from the bowl in front of your face. “Bite it on the side.”

You accepted the advice confused, not understanding where he was trying to go with it but excited, you loved a good old-fashioned improvised picture. Jaemin pointed the camera at you and counted to three, and you smiled around the strawberry when on the count of one, Haechan bit on the other side of the strawberry and looked at you cross-eyed. After you saw the flash of the camera going off, you decided to take a big bite of the strawberry to play around with Haechan but apparently the boy had the same idea and your lips ended up touching, slightly. Since when has your life become a cliché teenage movie? 

You quickly took the stem of the fruit from between your mouths, pulling away from the boy to tease him, “Damn. Didn’t even buy me dinner first.”

The others joined in on teasing Haechan but the man simply winked at you, “Would be my pleasure.”

You didn’t even have time to giggle before the other men pretended to puke and Renjun legit slapped Haechan.

                                       _____________________________________________

The boys decided to not do any activities that day because Jisung would simply not wake up and after a while waiting, Chenle decided to join him on the hibernation. It made you feel sad for them, that their days were so busy and tiring that at the first sight of some time off, they would sleep for hours and hours to make up for it.

The rest of you decided to play some volleyball in the parking lot (which  was not the best idea considering it was noon). As expected by the almost 40 degrees climate, one by one, every single boy started taking off their shirts, body dripping and glistening with sweat and you just felt in heaven. This could just not be real, you even looked around for cameras, scenes like that just didn’t happen in real life. One hot shirtless guy was the acceptable quota for normality.

But also, you didn’t miss the way they looked at you in your little shorts and top (equal rights after all). It made you feel powerful even though you knew it was just their hormones talking, yours were screaming too after all. If it was already like that on their second day here, you couldn’t imagine how you would survive for the next few weeks, you just wanted to cry every time Jeno (who was on your team) approached you to celebrate when either of you scored, high-fiving you with his huge arms (you would die a happy woman if you were choked by them).

After the game was over, the boys decided to go swim on the lake to cool off and you figured it would be a good time to shower and organize their beds, which you quickly did before starting to make some lunch for everyone. The youngest ones of the group didn’t even wake up to eat so you decided to leave them some food in the microwave in case they got hungry in the afternoon.

Unfortunately the Wi-Fi was being annoying as usual and refused to work, so you couldn’t even google about the boys yet, the curiosity was almost killing you. Maybe it was better like that, right now you were just seeing them as 7 young men living their normal lives and you liked it, it kept you from being nervous at the fact they were probably some big stars that had the world at their feet – They all just seemed so chill sprawled around the living room floor playing the bingo you had joked about earlier, it was hard to believe they probably had hoards of screaming girls around them daily.

They thanked you for cleaning their rooms and told you that you didn’t have to, which technically you did, considering it was literally your job and the whole reason you were there.

You could be wrong, considering you have known them for barely 2 days, but you quickly noticed some little things about them: Like how Jaemin liked to touch you, even if it was just a light brush of his hand on your arm (in his defense, he was touchy with everyone, but when he touched you, it just lingered for a bit longer), or how Haechan liked to playfully flirt with you, that boy just had no shame and you admired him for that. You saw how Renjun often stared at you but when you looked at him, he looked away (which could mean either he was shy or he just didn’t like you very much), but at least he was more subtle about it, as opposite to Mark, who became a blushing mess every time you caught his eyes (and you just wanted to squeeze him). You realized Jeno was a manlier guy, you hadn’t gotten what his deal was yet but you loved the way his eyes disappeared when he smiled and that was enough for you.

It was funny, really, how everyone decided to ignore the tension in the air and go on with the day normally – You did only meet the day before after all.

After getting bored with bingo, the boys told you they planned on going water skiing tomorrow and you agreed happily, telling them you could have a little barbecue party in the camping next to the docks where your parents kept the Inn’s water sports gears, which got them even more excited.

“Can we go camping too?” Jeno asked, receiving a groan from Haechan. Classic city boy.

“Like at night?” You asked and Jeno nodded. “Yeah, actually the stars here are crazy pretty since there’s no light pollution.”

“See?” The boy told Haechan excitedly, who only sighed, accepting his fate.

Barbecue, bonfire, alcohol and a beautiful sky: You were a city girl too but you were also a sucker for a good camping night.

taglist: @eggbutnotyolk @lauraneuuh @geeisaclown @jenotation @riemm @junguwuuu @prettychaeng @satanssugaraddiction @luvlyjaemin @sweetjaemss @oofimdumb @junglekooks @unknown5tar @rosedchae@

[absolutebl]

I'm not sure if this is an ask or just me rambling but I've been thinking about the balance between qualities in a show and which are the priority... Because I have been, unsurprisingly, watching some really bad BL.

But I keep watching it because despite the awful script, the bad concept, sound editing that is so bad even I noticed and everything else... the acting is AMAZING. Like, this director gets things out of these actors that I never seen anywhere else. It's bizarre!

And I don't know how to feel. Because, objectively, the show is AWFUL. Like, the absolute WORST. But I keep watching because the actors are so expressive and the emotions feel so raw and honest in a way that I don't see other places. Despite the horrible material, they SHINE.

It's very strange. And absolutely no one else (rightfully!) is watching this show so I don't even know how to discuss it.

Anyway! Uh. Good acting in an otherwise awful show. It's a thing, right?

You know I always love seeing you in my inbox...

Happy birthday, by the way!

Okay so are you watching One Love or is it You Are My Sky that's served you up this crisis?

When Good Actors Do Bad BL

Honestly, I don't think there is one simple answer but I have private theories.

Here's some spitballing.

Height Issues

No, literally, that's not a euphemism.

Okay, so one of the primary qualifiers for becoming the hero of a drama in many Asian countries is height. (Don't yell it me, may I remind you film is a visual medium, we superficial af.) This means that short talent in places like Korea goes into Kpop. (And it's also why I think we keep seeing idols do KBLs or portray younger brother side characters, they mostly not tall enough to be leads in Kdramas.) 

You remember when GMMTV was auditioning for F4? They had a height minimum for the 4 leads. Men shorter than whatever it was weren’t allowed to audition at all. 

Short talent in Thailand goes into BL.

Which is not to say the taller dudes can't act. It's just that the shorter guys are gonna struggle to get mainstream roles - especially as the BL industry has come to dominate Thailand's film production. This means we are actually getting some really good actors in Thai BL because they can’t get other roles, who are then wasted on terrible scripts.

Scripts

The better Thai BLs are all adapted from y-novels but Thailand is running out of good ones. The Thai pulps have never been able to afford options anyway, so they have always been crap. Without writer’s rooms, I don’t know who is actually scripting some of these, but it feels like... no one. And I can tell you from experience you can't let actors (or directors) just improvise a story, especially not young men who are supposed to be falling in love with each other. The actors don’t have enough real life experience yet.

Masculine Comfort Levels

I'm not sure how to put this but, men in general seem a lot more comfortable with physical touch and each other's company and intimacy in Thailand than in a lot of other cultures. It's as if masculine friendship is permitted to be more demonstrative by the greater culture. (This is not uncommon in hyper-masculine homophobic cultures like Russia or the Middle East as well, so it's not necessarily an indication of queer acceptance. Read more.) 

Anygay, I feel like this means a lot of male actors work better as romantic couples with other men, since there is no prudishness coming into play (and if you're straight, no fear of actually being turned on in the sex scenes).

For anyone reading this who wants more, I went on a long diatribe about this topic when someone asked me about skinship in Thailand.

[thekaijudude]

Dyna gains a new form in the TDG stage show?

So yeah apparently Dyna does get a new form, but not what we expected nor how we expected

This form is known as "Absolute Dyna" and apparently Tartarus kidnapped Dyna 25 years ago (sometime after the Star of Light movie as he recognized Tiga, but not Gaia) brainwashed him and empowered him with Absolute Particles, allowing Dyna to gain a new form

And actually, said new form has the same concept as the conceptual 'Unity Type' form from the Dyna Novel

Where in the stage show, apparently its stated that this form is all of his 3 forms combined into 1 and Absolute Dyna even stated that he never needs to switch forms anymore while in this form

And interestingly enough, Absolute Dyna in this stage show is actually on the Absolutians side, fighting against the Ultras

But I believe this design was one of the Dyna suits that showed up in the Tiga movie showing the civil war between the ancient giants, thats why it looks so simple

-

Ok so the question here is what are the implications of this in the main canon since we know that TsuPro has been implementing stage show concepts into canon left and right

Firstly, Ultras being empowered by Absolute Particles and thus, gaining a new form isn't really that surprising. Since technically Absolutians are also another species of ultras, and we know that Ultras can gain new forms after being empowered by another Ultra's energy (GS, Orb, Geed, Z etc)

So the immediate implications would be in UGF3 with Belial and Toregia. At this point, we've only seen their raw power increase without any aesthetic changes. But perhaps as they would be empowered with even more Absolute Particles, perhaps they would finally gain enough to assume new forms

And with Dyna seeing Tiga as his motivation to get stronger and thereby adopting his protectors, would potentially Absolute Belial adopt some of Ken/Zero's aesthetics and Absolute Toregia, Taiga/Taro's?

Onto the implications of this Absolute Dyna concept appearing in UGF3, I'd say that it's definitely possible since I've pointed out that currently the battle lineup seems really one sided rn with the Absolutian forces being really weak as compared to the Ultras, so we can definitely be sure that Tartarus would start to aggressively recruit anyone he can get his hands on

Tho speaking along the samw lines, at this point I suspect that the 4th Absolutian might actually be Gina. Especially since she was the first villian to be given a major spotlight aside from the current Absolutians (plus we still have yet to see the 4th Absolutian). Not to mention that in ep 1 of UGF3, Tartarus suspiciously only chose to revive her and not her brothers as well, sending her off to collect the Devil Splinters even. While there still exists a missing link here that Gina isnt an ultra-like being, perhaps any being that has enough of Absolutian/Ultra energy within them would turn them more into said being

(Which actually kind of sounds like what the VoL does to O50 ultras actually, might be onto something here but thats for another time)

(Or heck, now that I think more about it, wasnt this similar to Trigger Dark, Evil Tiga/Trigger, Chaosroid, Darkness Ultras etc?)

As for implications for Decker, while we kinda already expect his Super form to be exactly the same concept as Unity Type, one thing we aren't sure is how exactly is he gonna fuse 3 of his forms

But here's why my old prediction of the Absolutians making peace with the Ultras by the end of UGF3 comes in

I suspect that Decker would take place after UGF3 and following the same concept as the stage show, Tartarus or whichever Absolutian shows up in Decker and empowers him via the Absolute Particles which would allow him to fuse 3 of his forms, granting his Super form, perhaps Absolute Decker (which sounds rad af ngl). And said Absolutian does this in continued good faith in the aftermath of the war that ended in peace back in UGF3

Or even Absolute Dyna shows up in Decker either/or is also possible as well

Or hell, even in the same line of good faith, the Absolutians may even offer to actually upgrade Dyna as well after UGF3

[carrotmakar]

Not Every Show Is Perfect - a tvfbsotm extra

Pairing: Harry Styles x Reader

Word Count: 1.5k

Summary: Harry messes up live for the first time in what seems like forever and he gets all broken up about it. Thankfully, you’re there to help him realize that one mistake doesn’t mean he’s horrible.

Warning(s): Sign of the Times (yes, the song. and yes, i think it deserves a warning), cursing, Harry being hard on himself, tears, fluffiness, not edited (sorry, i didn’t want to bother anyone!!)

A/N: This is yet another extra to The View From Both Sides of the Mirror that nobody asked for!!! (if you haven’t read that, you can read it here). This is the second extra that I have written for them!!! There will be two more (at least) <33 

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*

It had been years since he had messed up on that song. He knew it like the back of his hand. He had poured his heart and his soul into writing it and then perfecting it for live performances. He knew exactly how to hit every single note. He knew how to hit the high notes without his voice cracking and he knew how to hit the lowest notes without it sounding strained  He had practiced for hours on end - sometimes to the point where his throat was raw and his voice was scratchy -to make it sound beautiful every time that he sang it live.

You know this for a fact. Even though you weren’t close during Harry Styles: Live On Tour, he had complained about how he could never get ‘Sign Of The Times’ right. About how he felt like he wasn’t doing his best and that he would disappoint because he just couldn’t hit those pesky high notes on stage. You heard the way that his voice would go scratchy, how he would sound like he was fighting to swallow correctly, how he sounded like he was severely dehydrated even if he drank bottle after bottle of water.

It had been over three years since he had last performed it on tour, and you had to admit, you were worried that he would mess something up. Not because you didn’t think he could do it, you know that he can. You know that he’s perfectly capable of getting everything right every single time. It’s more so because you know if he messes this up, he’ll make himself feel awful for the rest of the show. And what’s not helping his case is the fact that he’s stressed out about the mere thought of not hitting the right notes.

Here he was, the first show of the tour. He looked ethereal on stage. The lights were shining from behind him and making him look purely angelic. There’s already sweat soaking his hair and dripping onto his forehead. You can’t help but admire him like this, when he looks like he has absolutely nothing to hide, like he’s having the time of his life.

This show is also the first one that he would be singing the song at, and you could tell from the very first high note he tried to hit that he would be down on himself after the show. You feel your heart sink to your stomach, hating the fact that there’s nothing that you can do to help him get through this song without there being any mishaps.

The first time that his voice cracks, you visibly grimace, knowing what’s going on in his head. Knowing the self degrading thoughts that are whirling through his brain at a million miles per hour. 

Your thoughts were only confirmed when he looked over at you. You can already see the self loathing overtaking his features, the way that his face isn’t as bright anymore. 

You know that he’s calling himself everything he can think of. That he’s fighting the urge to stop, to give up and call off the whole thing. You know that he’s being more malicious to himself in this moment than he ever has been to anyone else. You’ve heard the things that he tells himself aloud as he’s getting undone from the show in the dressing room enough times to know exactly what he’s thinking. 

“How did I mess something so simple up that bad?”

“I shouldn’t even be performing.”

“This is going to ruin the show. All these people are going to have a horrible night and it’s all my fault.”

“I’m so fucking pathetic.”

“Nobody’s here to see me fuck it all up.”

“Can’t I do anything right?”

You want to run on the stage, to hug him and let him know that every thought he’s having is incorrect. You want to reassure him, tell him that he’s perfect, that one wrong note doesn’t mean that he’s awful. Everything in you wants to take him away from this moment, to get his mind off of it. There’s no way for you to do that, though, and the both of you know that. 

You also know that the reason he’s not looking at you nearly as much as he normally does is because each time he does, it makes it harder to stay on that stage when he could be in the comfort and safety of your arms.

After the song’s over, he looks over at you again and gives you a small, sad smile. You know that he’s hurting inside, that he’s beating himself up. Unfortunately for the both of you, he had just started the concert less than two hours ago. He’d be there for at least two more.

*

The moment the encore is over, he’s rushing off the stage and flinging himself in your arms.

“Hey baby.” You greet him as he buries his face in the crook of your neck. You run your hands through his sweaty hair. 

“Need you love.” He brokenly whimpers. You instinctively hold him closer. A few people come over to congratulate him about the show, but they can tell by the state that he’s in that he’s not really up to talking much.

“I’m right here. I’ve got you.” If you thought your heart was hurt due to this before, it was shattered now, ripped into a million little pieces by the tears that begin to fall onto your skin. “Come on, let’s go to our room. Is that alright, darling?”

He pulls back enough to wipe his eyes and say a vague goodbye and thank you to the crew. The moment that the two of you are in the elevator, however, he’s right back in your arms. He clearly needs to be held right now, and there’s nothing that you’d rather do than comfort him.

Before long, the lift comes to a halt and the doors slide open.

You pull away slightly but still keep his hand in yours. You lead him to the hotel room and swipe the keycard. The moment that you’re inside the room, he lets out a broken sob that you know he’s probably been holding for the duration of the show.

You immediately pull him into your arms and let his weight fall into you. Slowly, as to not disturb him too much, you back up to the bed so that you can lay with him and properly give him the cuddles that he needs.

Once the back of your knees hit the mattress, you let yourself fall back. You’re still holding onto him, so he comes toppling down on you, but you don’t mind. You both shuffle slightly to get comfortable, and you think that his sobs are getting a little quieter. You’re proven wrong, however, when he buries his head into your neck again and fresh tears wet your skin.

You run one hand through his hair while the other rubs circles into his back. “Shh, it’s okay baby. Let it all out.”

He takes a deep breath and you can hear the shake that finds its way into the sound. You grip him tighter and try to make him feel as safe as he possibly can.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” You mumble as you press a kiss to his head.

“I’m so pathetic.” He cries, and your heart breaks again.

“No you’re not, H. You’re not even close to pathetic.” You try to soothe him, although you know that there’s no way just that fixed anything

“Y/N, it’s the simplest song. I’ve had that song for years and I still mess it up? That’s pretty pathetic.” he struggles to get the words out but you know exactly what he’s saying. It’s the same thing that he’s been convincing himself to think every time that he so much as messes up a single note in ‘Sign Of The Times’. 

“Harry, listen to me.” You pause and wait for him to lift his head and meet your eyes. Once he does, you continue. “It’s not your easiest song. It’s one of your hardest. Please realize that anyone would mess up that song. You did amazing.” You continue to run your hand through his hair and he leans further into your touch. “You’re amazing. Please remember that baby.”

“I’ll try. It’s just hard sometimes.” He mumbles.

“I know. I just want you to be happier with yourself.” You move your hand so that it’s cupping his cheek and begin to run the pad of your thumb over his cheekbone. 

“I’m sorry.” He pulls away slightly.

You grab onto him to keep him from moving any further. “Hey, why are you apologizing?”

He shrugs. “Feel like I let you down.”

“Baby, you didn’t let me down. I’m so proud of you!” You pull him back into you and he falls into your arms.

“Promise?”

You smile. “Promise.”

*

Thank you so much for reading!! Remember to reblog to share with others!!

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[hlurz]

Finlandia

Where's Pennywise?

I like the way they're dressed

It wasn't my favourite of UMK but I like it

Lauri viejo sabroso

It was good

Israel

Love the confidence

And the performance.

He gives a proper show.

Is a requirement for the Israel entry to always scream high?

Serbia

Me da miedito esa mina

KNEEL

I like it but is weird

Should look the lyrics

El curita saltando memuéh

One thing that we all learn those last years was to wash our hands

It's catchy

Please don't tell me I will try to learn the hand's choreography

Azerbaiján

I remember that I didn't like it that much

But nice curls

Is kinda simple but powerful

The expression of the dancer!!

Georgia

Catchy af

Another ones with weird costumes

I asume that a trip induced by drugs would feel similar to this

They're cool

But is kinda repetitive

Malta

Such beautiful eyes

Why bring a piano if you are only using it less that 10 seconds?

Sounds like a teen movie song (but not the really popular ones)

Idk why she remembers me of Efendi

I like her vibe and energy

San Marino

They speak in Italian? That makes sense but I never realized before

The music is so cool

Purple hair my beloved

I fucking love it

The guitars. The fire. The mechanic bull

They're next level

Achille Lauro ft Måneskin when?

Australia

It's really impressive

I really really like it

Again, maybe knowing the lyrics I would like it more

But I love it

Chipre

I didn't like that start at all. Her voice sounds weird

But the performance is cool

It's giving me North African/Middle Eastern vibes but maybe is Cyprus culture?

It was enjoyable

Ireland

I like the song

Irish Dua Lipa

How she can dance and sing so well at the same time? I could never

Bye bye boy

Macedonia del Norte

Water again?

Genderswapped Suiza (Switzerland)

I like how expressive she is

Also nice voice

I was fearing she would start crying

Estonia

HIS VOICE

Not a fan of western cowboy things but this sounds cool

The guy is alone in a huge stage with 0 stuff and doing it all

Fucking love the energy

Everyone say a few words in Italian and I don't remember seeing something like that last year

Rumania

This year all is queerer that I expected. And I definitely not complaining

Why is always someone singing a few words in Spanish?

Not my fave but it's amazing

Polonia

His voice sounds kinda weird but is good

What's Eurovision without high notes?

Love the stormy thing

The dancers getting close to him make me nervous

The whole effect was amazing

Montenegro

Another blue one?

She's beautiful and her voice is really cool

Reminds me to Cirque du Soleil for some reason

Her eyes

Bélgica

Reminds me a Il Volo and Dove Cameron's Boyfriend

Is good but not super memorable

How cool they dance

Suecia

Epic chord instruments aren't always the key

Is a good song but I don't love it

I'm curious if they have to rehearsal every step that much as BC did

República Checa

Where are you now when I miss you?

Her dance

This woman is beautiful

I like this song since the first time I heard it

I love that they seem to have so much fun

España

Just to be clear, it wasn't one of my favorite from Benidorm

But is catchy

And again how is she so capable of singing and dancing like this?

Una reina

I really like it

Alemania

I really like this song

The lyrics, the way he sings, everything

(Also I think it wasn't my favorite from the preselection)

But is so raw and touching and personal

The stage looks so intimate and cozy

Reino Unido

This guy is so lovely

And the costume is amazing

I really really like it

The guitar part is so cool but so short

Francia

I'm weak for folk things

(And also for dudes who look like that)

I love that they reivindicate their culture

I feel like an antient ritual

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Getting To Know...

The Narcotix.

The Narcotix is a West African art-folk band based in Brooklyn, with feathers all over. It is many-limbed and limber, a five-piece with voices, guitars, bass, keys and drum set. Reverb-laden vocals blur and swell in dissonant intervals, buoyed by a riverbed of shimmering Congolese guitar riffs, thumping P-bass, cavernous synths and traphouse hi-hats. The result is a compelling musical statement whose relationship to identity is as fraught, complex and ever-changing as anything else in this time.

Composers Esther Quansah (guitars, vocals) and Becky Foinchas (keys, vocals) met in an elementary school chorus class in the ghostly woodlands of Woodbridge, Virginia. The daughters of African immigrants (Quansah from Cote D’Ivoire and Foinchas from Cameroon), they soaked up influences as far-flung and varied as choral symphonies, African wedding music, and progressive math rock, distilling them through a unique lens.

Mommy Issues was recorded in a quarantine-fugue state at the exquisite GB’s Juke Joint in Long Island City (Samia, La Vida Bohème, Vicentico). It is a culmination of boyish triumph and charm, belied by mesmerizing snapshots of contemplation and isolation not specific to this time. It is a collection of spectral elegies for the living, a macabre homage to Brothers Grimm folklore through an Afromasochistic lens.

We had a chat with Esther and Becky all about Mommy Issues, their creative process and more. Read the Q&A below.

Hi guys! How are you? What a mad year this has been!

“Lovely. Thanks for asking. We’re used to not knowing how to answer that question, but today the answer is readily available. Happyyyyyy :) We’re alive! And our music is being played by more than just our moms now. What’s not to love? The year has indeed been mad, but I can’t help but focus my attention on how fortunate we’ve been to be able to record and release an EP in the midst of the madness.”

For anyone discovering you here for the first time, please tell us a bit about the band and your musical influences.

“Well. We’re extreme. The EP will tell you everything you need to know about each one of us.. I know that sounds pretentious but quite literally, each song is named after a member of the band with the intention of emulating their personality. As for influences, thiiiink...an inconceivable combination of West-African wedding music, anything with a dirty bassline, extreme choral music, music you’d play by the fire, mad scientist music, etc.”

You’re gearing up to release your debut EP Mommy Issues. What can you tell us about the record?

“The record is fear-mongering . It’s a mixture of jokes that went too far, accidents where we landed on our feet, and mistakes we didn’t know we wanted to make. A butterfly effect of sneezes and coughs that ended up in our favor. It’s a product of our still raw, still bleeding collective consciousness, making the record grossly vulnerable. It’s strange. The record is strange, colorful, a mirror for us all. It’s a paradoxical fun-house of unsettling curiosities wrapped in a tufted robe smoking a cigar full of expired lampshades. Yeah, we don’t know either.”

Please take us through your songwriting/creative process for Mommy Issues. What was your favourite part and what did you find most challenging?

“We’ve fallen into the habit of finishing each other’s sentences, spoken or otherwise. So usually the idea for a song is born through a simple riff. We’ll send each other an initial riff, then continually layer elements, and keep sending the project back and forth in a childlike dance until we just can’t anymore.

“The best way to describe the way in which this “process” commences is to say we are visited by an idea. It (the idea) will come seemingly by accident, following a stream of unconscious urges, and manifest when we least expect it. In the case of ‘Esther’, the final track on Mommy Issues, Becky was with a friend when the keyboard riff for the song visited her. She asked her friend to immediately record the riff before it left her, saying “send this riff to Esther,” thereby foreshadowing and sparking/catalyzing the concept for the entire EP to come. When she sent the riff, Esther was rightfully pissed. It was genius. A beautiful, simple, haunting yet fortifying little loop in five. So, Esther started writing “Riff to Rebecca” as a response.

“Favorite part of the writing process will always be one of us opening up a logic file and listening to what TOMFOOLERY the other one has decided to grace us with this time.

“Because we have no control over when we’re “visited” by an idea, we tend to have a lot of ideas in the backlog. As we type this, we pretty much already have the beginnings of the next album ready to go. The tough part has always been revisiting the riffs at a later time, once we’ve already long exited the state we were in when creating them. That flow state, while raw and vulnerable af, can be really fleeting. So, to go back and try to “flesh” out an idea can feel a bit like editing a journal entry you wrote while thoroughly drunk five years ago.”

Finally, what's next for you guys? I expect you're eager to get back to gigging? Do you have any dates already lined up? Any more new music on the way?

“Many of us are in relationships, and Becky is asexual so...no dates lined up. BUTT we do have an entire album in the backlog that we’re looking forward to finishing in tandem with playing some shows in Brooklyn/NYC/Virginia this summer. Check out our website or instagram for details on upcoming shows this summer :) Buns out.”

Mommy Issues is out now.

[jaybug-jabbers]

Pokemon Prism Review

Well I’m currently finishing up the post-game content of Pokemon Prism.

Dang.

What a fun game.

(what follows is an informal review of the game. it got a little long, lol. it has some spoilers for the game, of course.)

My background

To give you a quick idea on my perspective on Pokemon, I grew up with Pokemon Red on the big grey brick Gameboy. After Red, I pretty much stopped playing for many years. My little brother had a Gameboy Color and had Silver, but I never got one myself. Wasn’t ‘til years and years later I found some emulators and played through several generations of Pokemon at once. So, Gen 2 really isn’t nostalgic for me. It’s close enough to Gen 1 to hit some nostalgia buttons, though. I am admittedly somebody who feels Gen 1 is the best gen of pokemon. I don’t care of people laugh or say I’m a genwunner for believing that. Gen 1, I feel, had the raw creativity and charm of the original idea, and it simply sets my imagination alight far more than any other gen does. Those simple pixel designs for those little virtual creatures just opened up a world in my mind. THAT SAID, I did play and very much enjoyed all the other gens of pokemon. I do not shun things just because they are new, and I am not one of those people who says the new designs of pokemon are stupid. I adore plenty of modern pokes.

Blend of Old and New

Anyway! Pokemon Prism, for those unaware, is a ROM hack of Pokemon Crystal. It essentially delivers a brand-new Pokemon adventure for the Generation 2 games. It’s a really neat blend of classic gameplay and modern features. You’ll find species from modern games all the way from Gen 3 (such as Breloom) to Gen 6 (such as Sylveon) but their sprites perfectly integrate them organically into the Gen 2 environment. You’ll get many modern pokemon moves and conviences but also plenty of throwbacks to older experiences. Miss crafting pokeballs from Apricorns? It’s there. Enjoy a simplier time when there weren’t any Natures? Well, there ya go. Really want to call Joey and talk to him about his Rattata? Well, err, no, you can’t do that, but let’s face it, the telephone feature was probably one of the most hated features in Gen 2. :P

But Prism isn’t simply about updating Gen 2 with some modern pokemon, moves and game features. Not in the slightest. It’s full of original mechanics and gameplay concepts, and has tons of original areas and an original storyline. Pokemon is known for experimenting with new gameplay ideas, so it’s really fitting and enjoyable to see these take shape as you play the game. Mining and crafting is introduced in the game, for example, and there are a couple new pokemon types. There’s even a few sections where you can play as your pokemon, Mystery-Dungeon style. Do all of these experiments with new concepts work? Probably not ALL of them– when you try something new, not all of them will work out as amazing as you’d hope. But a lot of them are welcome and fun additions. And the game is bristling with these new ideas! It’s a joy to see so much creativity and novelty.

Sprites

It should be noted the spritework for these games is A+ and utterly fantastic. There is perhaps 3 or 4 out of dozens and dozens of new sprites that I thought were a tad off? Seriously, they look AMAZING and their animations are perfect and they fit in with the style so well I found myself briefly getting confused as to which were originally from Gen 2 and which weren’t. Saying these sprites are good is no small thing, because they are such a vital part of the game. The backsprites were not shafted, either– something even Gamefreak often shortchanged on back then.

Music

It should also be noted the music in this game is really damn good and has a huge variety. There are tons of classic songs, classic remakes of modern pokemon songs, remixes, and original tunes. There were like one or two tunes I was a bit iffy on, but considering that’s only a few out of so many, that’s impressive. The new bike music and Surfing music are probably my favorites, and they are SO GOOD, and those are especially important ones to sound good, because you typically hear those a lot.

Writing

The writing in this game is fairly solid. Not A+, but still not bad. It suffers occasionally from slightly rough and confusing grammar, and the climax of the story is definitely anti-climactic and very weak. In addition, the post-game story basically does not exist, but that can be excused since most likely more story was planned but they ran out of time. (C&D)

I also felt that at times, the story felt out-of-place within the world of Pokemon and went “too far” in the darker direction. The entire prison sequence, especially, and the frequent mention of inmates being mistreated, pokemon being abused, etc., just felt a bit much. Because this game was largely concerned with replicating the feeling of a true Pokemon game (some hacks intentionally focus on making a story that would never take place in the Pokemon world, like zombie survival horror stories or whatnot), I find it relevant to mention that. All of that said, though, its darker departures were at least not *too* extreme. We don’t get the very jarring and frequent problem of some ROM hacks where it’s full of cussing all the time or intense violence. Compared to those it’s still relatively subtle. And while the NPCs in this game I felt were rude a little too often, (holy crap, it felt like 95% of Naljo and Rijon were crankyass people) I do appreciate the attempts at making people a little more “real” and not quite so freaking happy and idealized all the time like Nintendo tends to do. The dialogue often made me chuckle. It did go a tad overboard with that “realness” (because, hey, a variety of people exist in the world, you know, both rude and polite, optimistic and bitter) but oh well.

So yes, the writing had its drawbacks. But overall, it felt like it was progressing a pokemon-style narrative with some interesting ideas, and wasn’t simply a dreary rehash of the same basic tropes Pokemon has been regurgitating for ages now. I just think if the writing were cleaned up a bit– the grammar cleaned up in a few sections, the plot threads clarified a bit more, and the climax reworked– it could take a “decent story” and make it a great one. There’s definitely some neat ideas there, it just needs polish.

Maps

As to the different towns and locations in this game to explore, there are many. This game is ambitious AF. As I said, it’s FULL of new ideas, features, things to do, and places to explore. Naljo is the region you explore in the main game, but post-game you can wander a whole new region of Rijon (the featured location of an older ROM hack, Pokemon Brown) and beat all the gyms there. In addition, there’s a few towns in Kanto and Johto you can visit (I believe they originally planned to open up all of those regions eventually), AND one town in ANOTHER new region, Tunod. The game’s ambitiousness occasionally outpaces what it delivers, but that’s quite acceptable in my mind, since updates with additions to the game were originally planned. So, yes, there isn’t much to do post-game, but that’s largely because a lot of stuff was going to be added.

Back to the locations, though! It’s an important aspect of ROM hacks. Not everyone is good at designing a good town, with logical building placement, intuitive layouts, aesthetically pleasing locations, and interesting things to explore so it doesn’t feel totally plain and lacks character. I’m pleased to say this game does a great job of it, though. I should point out I have a terrible sense of direction and bad spatial memory. Despite that fact, I found myself remembering important features and where they were located– oh, the Move Deleter house is in Phacelia on the left, the bullet train is in Torenia– and that’s a good sign. Physical travel was not a sloggy chore, and it wasn’t bogged down in a confusing layout. Towns were memorable and fun to explore.

Pacing/Level Curve

Another thing ROM hacks can screw up, because it’s a tricky thing to do, is the challenge pacing. How many trainers? What teams do they have? What levels? Are the Gyms challenging without being insane? I actually Nuzlocked the main part of the game. In my opinion it was well-paced. There’s probably fewer trainers overall in this game than a standard Pokemon game. But it did not take me much extra grinding in the grass– and I was only doing that to play it safe for the Nuzlocke. And that’s GOOD. You shouldn’t have to do tons of grinding in the grass all the time just to have a reasonable shot at the gyms. Pokemon Uranium, sadly, seems to suffer from that issue. So, yeah, the pacing was very reasonable to me, good balance of fair and challenging.

… with one important note. Once you reach the League? Well, we could have used higher-levelled wild pokemon in the cave that served as the victory road. The highest in that cave was level 34 or so, and you were facing trainers with teams ~level 55. That’s a huge gap. Not everyone has the same play style. Some people like to do extra grinding before the Elites. Some people are Nuzlocking and may do extra grinding as a safety buffer. Some people might want to adjust their team & add a new pokemon to their team and need to grind them up from a lower level. For those cases, you NEED decently-levelled wild pokemon to grind on. So, yeah, I really do think the Seneca Caves wild pokemon need a level buff. It would also help with the level gap for the post-game. Trainers in Rijon are suddenly at levels 70ish and higher, and for some folks playing, that’s a bit much and they’d like to do a little grinding first.

Puzzles

This game has puzzles. You have been warned, lol. Apparently a lot of people found the number of puzzles a bit frustrating, or felt that some of them were excessively tricky or annoying. I find it very funny, because usually puzzles are my least favorite part of a pokemon game. But I really enjoyed the puzzles in Prism and didn’t find it annoying or offputting at all. I was sick with a cold through most of my play of Prism, and yet even in my dumb brainaddled state, I didn’t find the puzzles too difficult. I solved them all at a pretty average length of time, even the ones some people traditionally found a little unclear or confusing. (the Ruins puzzle often confuses folks, apparently, but I really didn’t have a problem with it at all.) I was briefly confused on one of the switch puzzles (and it contained an element of bad puzzle design imo– there’s a gap that you can leap down into when normally a gap of that size just gives the ‘run into wall’ sound and is not passable) but not for too long. Even the ice slide puzzles, which I traditionally hate with a passion, were not bad!

All except for one thing. The Magikarp Puzzle. Anyone who has played Prism knows what I mean. Haha, fuck that puzzle man. Even the creator of the ROM hack himself has acknowledged the puzzle was not great, heh. To be honest, I find it kind of hilarious, in a way, though. I mean, obviously it’s a nightmarishly difficult and frustrating puzzle and is intensely exhausting to look at, let alone try to solve. But it’s also kinda glorious in its demonicness. I didn’t spend too much time on it before just looking up a solution to it. It’s tedious and not fun at all, and hey, that’s OK, because even the creator realized that.

pls nerf magikarp

But seriously, outside of the magikarp puzzle, I didn’t just enjoy the puzzles in this game– I felt like they were an important part of what gave this game its character.

Fakemon

There are even a few fakemon in this game! Which I was excited to learn because I thought there weren’t! All of the fakemon are Legenderies. Unfortunately, I don’t care for most of their designs. Like, at all. I think Varaneous and Libabeel’s sprites look really, really shitty. They’re ugly and don’t match the style of Pokemon at all. This feels weird to say, since I love so much about this game, but man, there’s just no way around it, I hate ‘em. Everyone has their own tastes, of course. There’s a couple fakemon I have yet to capture– I’m finishing that up now and the very very last of the post-game. But one fakemon I did capture and ADORE LIKE NO OTHER is Phancero.

I happen to know about Phancero’s designer, because I saw their design years ago. They apparently were approached by the team and were asked permission for the use of the design, which is awesome. I won’t rant again about Phancero here because I already ranted about it before, and literally could keep ranting for pages. :P But yeah, it’s a totally creative and awesome pokemon both in idea and execution, and by FAR my favorite fakemon ever created.

Conclusion

This is the best ROM hack I have played in years and probably ever. I haven’t played hundreds of ROM hacks, but I have probably played dozens over the years. I think they are a creative and wonderful expression of the pokemon community, but let’s be honest. There’s a lot of really bad ROM hacks out there. There’s even more ROM hacks that have a lot of potential but are never finished or anywhere near completion. (And that’s perfectly understandable. People run out of time, they have real life get in the way, etc.) The fact that not only did a ROM hack of this caliber get made, but was 95-99% completed? Is fantastic. It was an intensely massive project and I cannot begin to imagine how much work it must have been. Pokemon games are normally developed by an entire team at a company, and folks are paid to do it. The comparatively small team of devs who made this game in their spare time and implemented these amazing things had to do it all on their own. It’s no wonder it took as long as it did for them to finish it; and the amount of effort SHOWS. There is so much loving attention to detail and polish to Prism. (I mean, yes, there’s still some bugs and the occasional unfinished bits, but of course there are, those were going to be finished, but then the C&D hit)

Most ROM hacks are just strong in a few areas, because it’s one or two people who have strengths or interests in a few things. So, you’ll play a hack with a really good story but terrible fakemon and mapping, or you’ll play a hack with fantastic designs of new areas, but no new story, etc. Prism kinda has everything, though. It really did feel like playing a new Gen 2 game.

(It’s now almost 11pm and oh god where did the time go. I have a problem with being concise. :P This was far longer than I intended but thank you if you’ve read this far!)

This is a repost on a new blog. The original post was on Jan 17, 2017.

[thedreadvampy]

please keep talking abt wrestling. i've kinda fallen into this hole recently and, since you're cool af, I would love to know whatever you have to say about it

Well I mostly watch AEW although I was very into Progress before the pandemic (which is a London-based indie promotion that's also basically the feed source for NXT UK) but idk whether or in what state Progress will come back not just bc of the pandemic but bc this year's wrestling abuse scandals involved a lot of their management and core roster so they've had to really reshuffle.

anyway that's an unnecessarily grim diversion let's talk AEW (I'm a few episodes behind bc I watch on Zoom with my pals and it's easy to fall behind while trying to line up our schedules, we're gonna watch Winter Is Coming tonight)

This blog's opinions are:

Women's wrestling is severely underrated and that's the fault of the promotion not the fans, AEW has a phenomenally talented women's roster with a big fan following but consistently gives them no air time, very little space to develop plots, one match per episode that the commentators half-ignore, and only ever one plot at a time. I love Hikaru Shida, Nyla Rose and Britt Baker as characters but there's a huge women's roster of compelling characters who only ever show up on Dark or for a single bout not tied into any particular plot on Dynamite and it's very wearing. When they launched AEW they made a big deal about equal pay for the men and women's rosters and paying the same regardless of gender and fan status, purely based on card position, but that means absolutely nothing if there's only ever one women's match and it's always at the same mid-card position. Sorry to open on a negative but it makes me so mad that WWE, the company which is notoriously misogynistic and whose director had to be shown Asian schoolgirl porn to accept that the audience would find Japanese wrestlers "sexy enough" to put in the ring, is somehow a better venue for women's wrestling than AEW. like fuckkkkkkkkk just treat the women's roster like you would the men's!!!!

on which note, AEW Heels, the Paid Fanclub For Women Who Like Wrestling, is the most half-assed attempt to court the female wrestling audience I've ever seen (and I watched WWE's Revolution pay-per-view where the line was 'isn't it nice that the men have allowed women to have their own PPV thanks to all the men who made this possible'). like ok I COULD give you money to Be A Female Fan OR, wild concept, you could do more than one women's match per episode on your flagship show and not relegate the women's tag title to YouTube

Relatedly, There's Too Much Wrestling. As you can probably tell from the fact I'm 4 episodes behind on Dynamite, I struggle enough to fit 2 hours of wrestling into my week, but AEW also expected me to keep up with Dark, BTE, and sometimes other side projects? and now also Impact and NWA and sometimes NJPW. and then if I want to recognise big names they're bringing in I would also have had to watch WWE which like. there's even more WWE than AEW. idk I'm a completionist and it's simply not possible to watch All The Relevant Wrestling bc that would be like. 20 hours a week and I have a job and a life and stuff. like I watch AEW Dynamite and BTE and that does me.

this is all very negative but I love wrestling! I got into it a couple of years ago and it's absolutely incredible to me I love the artistry I love the athleticism I love the creativity and the fun people have with their characters. and the reason I gave up on WWE as soon as AEW started up is that it feels so much like the wrestlers are given space to play and to find the stories they want to tell.

MJF is a DELIGHT he's like one of my favourite heels he's so loathsome and so much fun! and there's like a really good consistent emotional core to his overall storyline of desperate insecurity I'm so into it and I'm so hype about when inevitably Wardlow's gonna turn on him. I love the resonance of his relationship with Cody vs his relationship with Wardlow and also the extremely strong gay unrequited love vibes that keep popping up here.

Hikaru Shida is AMAZING I love her. did u know she makes her own ring gear and learnt to speak English pretty much from scratch when she joined AEW a year ago and is now cutting full promos in English? also her facial acting? 😘👌👌👌👌

Sonny Kiss is phenomenal I hope they're on Dynamite more bc not only is she a phenomenal character in their own right but when she started tagging with Joey Janela their in-ring chemistry actually made me LIKE Janela for the first time. also it warms my heart that JR, despite being kind of an old fogey, is regularly correcting other commentators on their pronoun use and vocally acknowledging that Sonny is nonbinary.

honestly JR does just warm my heart in general like he visibly struggled early on with getting out of the 2000s mindset on Female Wrestlers Are Sexy Divas and he accidentally misgendered Nyla Rose one time but he's been really open to criticism and often gone to bat for the trans and queer members of the roster. he seems like a nice guy and I'm glad he's here, which I didn't think I'd be saying a year ago yk?

I know I already said this but Chris Jericho is a phenomenon. he just makes everything FUCKING FUN every story he tells is wild and hilarious. The Inner Circle gives me life (on this blog we stan Ortiz) and his beef with Orange Cassidy was pure gold.

Also Matt Hardy is here!!!! I love Matt Hardy, I think his Ultimate Deletion match with Bray Wyatt was what made me realise how fun wrestling can be and he always brings the creativity. He's been through a lot of shit in his life, I'm really happy that he's able to work with a promotion that gives him room to be as hogwild as he wants because Matt Hardy's great strength is being absolutely off-the-chain weird. I love him.

Speaking of Matt Hardy and the Inner Circle have you seen the Stadium Stampede from this summer? honestly worth buying the whole PPV just for that it's wild choice after wild choice for 45 minutes it might be the best wrestling match ever. idk if I like it better when Matt Jackson Northern Lights suplexes Sammy Guevara the entire length of a football field, when Matt Hardy chases Sammy with a golf cart, the whole bit where Adam Page just goes off and gets drunk in a bar and has a brawl with Jake Hager, the bit where Proud & Powerful try to drown Matt Hardy but every time he goes underwater he comes up in a different costume and persona - holy shit it's just amazing it's everything I love about wrestling

Moving away from AEW, the best wrestling storyline I've ever seen is Progress' story with Cara Noir and Ilya Dragonov. They're both phenomenal wrestlers but also the raw power and emotional weight of the story? it's simple but it's heartachingly beautiful I was lucky enough to be in the audience for the second of 3 matches in the story and I was nearly in tears it's so theatrical and balletic???? Check it out if you can it's in Progress' video archives (those are all pay-to-watch though. I think they're also on Amazon Prime for American viewers?)

Cara Noir is probably my favourite wrestler, although Nyla Rose, Charlotte Flair, Chris Jericho, Luchasaurus and Adam Page are all up there. He's just the most phenomenal physical performer and he really gets how much theatre is in wrestling, his facial acting is impeccable and he's not afraid to take hard bumps and really sell. also he just seems like a very sound person out of character (touch wood), he's very principled and takes his work and the wellbeing of his colleagues really seriously which is what you want in a wrestler

[sortasirius]

Arizona (15x07 Coda)

Pairing: Lee Webb/Dean Winchester

AN: I loved this episode very much and this is very sad I’m sorry

Warnings: Angsty af, breakup fic, mentions of violence

Words: 1231

Read on AO3 here!

Arizona is probably always hot, but in the middle of the summer, when all there is are rough hewn mountains in the distance and heat-baked, deadened shrubs and rocks and sand and cacti dotting the landscape, it was like hell on earth.  But fortunately for Dean and Lee, hell on earth is a small price to pay for freedom to hunt on their own. 

Dean doesn’t even know what they’re hunting.  Lee had said there was something in this area, some creature was tearing its vics to shreds, and so he and Dean had hopped in Lee’s shitty pickup truck, telling John that they would meet him in Grand Junction in two weeks.

They drive with the windows down, mostly because Lee’s truck didn’t have any air conditioning, but the breeze on the highway was nice, with nothing but blue sky and cracked grey asphalt in front of them.  They sing through every cassette tape Lee has, until their throats are raw from singing and laughing.

The heat sears their necks as they walk from the truck to their shitty hotel room, paid for with hustled pool money, collapsing on the beds and turning the little AC unit so low that it rattled persistently, liable to break at any second.

“I don’t want to leave this room,” Dean sighs, sprawled out on the bed with his shirt hiked up, the hot skin of his back resting on the cool duvet.

“Then how’re we gonna catch this fucker?” Lee asks, staring at him from in front of the TV, where he’s trying his damndest to get the thing to find a non-staticy channel.

“We’ll have to be like wolves, only hunt at night.”

“Where’d you learn your predators?  Wolves don’t only hunt at night, idiot.”

“Only the cool ones do.”

Lee laughs at that, and Dean grins, letting his eyes close and his head drop back onto the bed.  It had been a long run from Wyoming, the Tetons still etched in his mind.  He and Lee would have to go back there someday, not to hunt, but just to see the mountains, maybe hike them, reach the peak of one of them, stand on top of the world for a minute.

“We takin the night off or what?”

Dean’s eyes open and Lee is standing over him, having given up on their lost cause of a TV, static still buzzing from the tiny screen.

“Got a dud there?”

“Eh, I guess, I got nothing else to give her, she won’t even give me the news.”

“Like you’d watch the news, anyway.”

“I’d rather watch you.”

And Lee has that look on his face, the one that’s soft but hungry, telling Dean what he wants but never pressuring him into it, just like the first night, that night when they were hunting on their own, and had forgotten the monster to get shitfaced, John mercifully catching them when their clothes were on, throwing all their hard-earned whiskey down the drain, but never erasing that night from Dean’s mind. 

He reaches up and balls his fist in Lee’s t-shirt, pulling him down on top of him, and they don’t think about the monster for a while.

They still don’t know the name of the thing they’re hunting, but they think they know what kills it, simple enough, they think.  They stock up on gasoline at the little hardware store on the corner, the old man giving them judgemental eyes the second they walk in the door.  They ignore him, instead they find themselves giggling, Dean, putting Lee in a headlock when Lee points out the hickies on his neck.

Staking out the thing’s lair is where it becomes more complicated, because it’s not a lair, it’s a house.  With a family inside.  And they know that going in too soon is good for nothing but a bail-out call to John and six hours of screaming at them in the car.  So they wait in Lee’s truck, listening to the same cassette tape over and over, humming along in spite of themselves, the music carrying them away, carrying them too far away, so they’re in the back of the truck before they know it, completely forgetting about the creature and the innocent family inside.

It was a mistake.  By the time they kick the door in, the family is shredded, and the creature is curled up on the floor, stomach full to bursting.  Dean cries when he sees the children’s shoes on the floor, because this is their fault, this is all their fault.

They burn the thing, because that’s what their supposed to do, and they make a pact to never tell John what happened.  The hotel doesn’t seem as welcoming anymore, with mussed sheets and empty condom wrappers nothing but a reminder of what they had just caused.  Lee stands in the doorway, hands against the frame, refusing to take a step into the room.

“I don’t think I can do this anymore, Dean.”

“What do you mean?”

“That one.  What we found, what that thing did, those kids, man.  I, I think I need a break.”

“Okay, okay.  Let’s take a break then.  I’ll call dad, tell him we’ll meet him at the next stop.”

Lee looks at the ground, the smile on his face more sad than anything else, and Dean’s head knows what’s coming, but his heart hasn’t caught up yet.

“I think it just needs to be me.  I need some time.”

Dean stops breathing.

“Away from me?”

Lee sighs, looking away from Dean, when normally he couldn’t look away.

“I guess.”

“What am I supposed to do without you?”

Lee still won’t look at him, even though Dean is fighting to meet his eyes, because if they just locked eyes, if they just saw each other, Dean could convince Lee to not do this.  Don’t do this.  Don’t do this.

Don’t do this.

“I’m sorry.”

Lee leaves Dean to hitchhike to Grand Junction, and he leaves the sun-baked earth behind him, pressing his face to the window of the truck he’s in, half hoping he’ll see Lee’s truck pull up next to them, that this is all a dream, that it isn’t real.  Because it can’t be real.

John sees the look on Dean’s face when he gets to their meeting place, and he doesn’t ask questions.  They move on, erasing Lee Webb from John’s contacts.  Dean never mentions him again, because some loves like that are just too painful to lose, and even more painful to think of later. 

In the years that followed, Dean only allowed himself to think about Lee in the dead of night, when John was off drunk somewhere, when Sam was dead asleep, or when he was alone in the Bunker.  He would think of his too long hair in his face, his clear blue eyes, the way he sounded when he cracked a high note in a song, how his lips felt against Dean’s.  These thoughts would only deepen the ache, but the ache made him feel alive, reminded him of his biggest mistake and his biggest regret.

Lee Webb’s eyes never left him, not for the rest of his life, and every time he sang too loud in the car, it was almost like he was there with him, hot wind hitting their faces, Arizona promising freedom, promising everything.

[godofglitter]

Hey there :) if you’re still taking fic prompts, I’d love a lamen au where Laurent is coming home wretchedly drunk for the first time after his uncle has again found a way to control and keep him from his heritage, and because drunk Laurent doesn’t want to return home that vulnerable, he wanders around outside where he meets his hot college boy neighbor Damen who just comes home from a party. He ends up taking Laurent home who thinks he’ll have to “pay” for it, and of course Damen is shocked af

Hi!

As always, thank you for sending me this prompt, I really enjoyed writing drunk flirty Laurent haha. 

Hope you like it!

Oxytocin- GodOfGlitter

*

Damen did not sign up for this shit.

He blamed Jokaste.

It all started when she’d walked into the party hanging on to Kastor’s arm like she belonged there, and Damen had almost spat out the beer in his mouth at the all-too-familiar sight. Something about it made his blood boil- not that he still cared about Jokaste, or the fact that she’d cheated on him with his freaking brother- and before he knew it, he was pushing away a clearly concerned Nikandros and walking out of the other end of the frat house.

He’d decided to take a walk around the local park before heading home, wanting to cool his head a little- and then he’d stumbled upon him.

Damen did not like Laurent de Vere. He loved hated him. He really did. Their very public quarrels were famous all over Arles University, as were their meaningless yet undeniably charged competitions in the multitude of sports they both played. They never seemed to be able to stay in the same room for too long, and Damen refused to listen to Nik’s completely shameless jibes about unresolved sexual tension.

Clearly, that was not the case. Obviously.

The point was- Laurent was here. In the park. Sitting on a bench at three o clock in the morning, hair shining golden bright despite the near complete darkness surrounding them- and he was reciting fucking poetry and he looked beautiful and Damen just-

-he couldn’t.

“So is this what you do when you’re not thinking up ways to torture me?” he said, taking a step towards Laurent even as his brain screamed at him to turn the other way and run.

Laurent whipped his head back quickly, eyes going a little unfocussed- and it was then that Damen noticed how flushed his cheeks were, how bright his eyes looked- Laurent was wretchedly, unmistakably drunk.

“Fuck the universe. I do not need you here right now.” Said Laurent, slurring his words only slightly- and Damen valiantly ignored the twinge of hurt that passed through his chest at that.

You look prince-like in the moonlight, he thought, but the words that came out of his mouth were “I should’ve known you were such a nerd. Let me guess- you’re reciting the Iliad so you can sober up? That is really fucking hilarious- why don’t you just go home and take a nap or something?”

Wrongwrongwrong he thought, as Laurent’s lips turned into a bitter smile that made Damen’s heart yearn to wrap him up in his arms and never let go. “I couldn’t do that,” said Laurent, sounding pained in a way Damen knew he’d never reveal when sober- “It’d just give Uncle Dearest another excuse to keep the damn estate.”

It took a second for Damen to understand the implications of those words- that Laurent’s uncle, the Dean of Arles University, whom everyone actually really liked- was trying to keep Laurent from the estate his parent had left for him when they’d died. And that Laurent- fearless, sharp witted, fierce Laurent- was actually scared of his uncle’s plots.

Damen decided he hated Dean de Vere.

“Come on.” Said Damen, stepping closer to the bench and ignoring Laurent’s shocked intake of breath in favor of wrapping his arms around his shoulders and hoisting him up against his chest. Adjusting his position to make Laurent more comfortable, Damen started walking home, careful to take the route he’d taken countless times himself- the one that prevented him from passing by Vere Manor.

“What are you doing?” said Laurent- and this close, Damen could see the flecks of gray running through pure azure and half his wits decided to desert him completely.

“I’m taking you back to my apartment. So you can rest and sober up properly.” Said Damen, grateful for the first time that Laurent was drunk- at least this way, he couldn’t notice the note of breathlessness in his voice.

Laurent blinked rapidly, and Damen almost lost his balance at the sight of his boyish, long lashes- and how prettily they fanned over the flushed expanse of his cheeks. He was beautiful, heart- wrenchingly so, and Damen found himself drawn to every curve, every inch of him- powerless to resist.

“…okay.” Said Laurent, before nuzzling into Damen’s chest and letting out a contented sigh that made his heart jump through hula-hoops and perform elaborate summersaults in his chest.

“Did I ever tell you how much I love your biceps?”

-fuck, thought Damen, before he actually tripped- regaining his balance quickly and narrowly avoiding crashing them both into the curb.

This is going to be a long night.

*

Damen knew the exact moment when Laurent woke up.

Of course, that was only because he’d been awake since he’d deposited a very drunk and very frank Laurent on his bed and retreated to the couch- he couldn’t deal with that much flirting. And groping.

Not like this.

Sleep had eluded him, and he’d spent the night- morning, really- listening to Laurent’s quiet, calm breathing and trying not to replay every compliment, every drunk confession a hundred times in his mind. Finally, tired of his own brain’s hyperactivity, he’d decided to abandon pretending to sleep and entered his room so he could take a shower.

Big mistake.

Laurent was beautiful when he slept- all calmness and innocence he usually kept hidden behind a steel strong mask during the day. His hair- slightly long, Damen noticed pathetically-fanned on his pillow, looking like fine threads of the purest gold in the faint sunlight. The pale blue of his irises was just visible from under porcelain skin; eyes dashing rapidly about, clearly caught up in a dream.

One look and Damen forgot basic human functions. One look, and suddenly he wanted so much more.

He was coaxing his legs to move for the fifth time when Laurent woke up- slowly, at first, just a small blinking of his eyes and a slight nuzzling into the pillow that hit Damen right in the chest- and then all at once. Within a second, Laurent was sitting upright on the bed, clearly nauseated by the movement yet unwilling to acknowledge it. Damen was fascinated by the quickness of his mind- it only took him that second to realize that the room wasn’t his, and that something had happened last night that he did not remember.

And then he turned to Damen.

“I was drunk.” He said, sounding fetchingly hoarse. “You brought me home and let me sleep here.” He continued, as if stating simple facts and not events that had robbed Damen’s heart from his chest- and all he could do was nod dumbly. “And now I need to pay you and leave.”

Wait, what? Thought Damen, shaking his head to remove the cobwebs from the logical part of his brain and praying to God that he’d misheard Laurent.

“I didn’t help you for money.” Said Damen, letting some of the indignation he felt seep into his voice. “I know how we are outside, but I’d never use your vulnerability against you. I’m not your uncle, Laurent.”

Shocked blue eyes rose up to meet his, and Damen was momentarily floored by the raw intensity in them- such as he’d never seen before. “What did I tell you yesterday?” said Laurent, advancing slowly towards Damen, who tried not to feel cornered and embarrassed and failed miserably.

“Look, I’m not going to tell anyone, okay? The feud between you and your uncle is yours to resolve- I won’t do anything to jeopardize the image you’ve created. I’m not that immoral, Laurent- have some faith in me.”

“That’s the first time you’ve ever said my name.” said Laurent, in lieu of an acquiescence- and all of Damen’s indignation melted away in the face of his awe.

“Laurent.” He breathed again, aching to close the distance between them and touch.

“Damen.” He replied- and just like that a year of pointless fighting vanished into thin air, and all that was left was this charge.

“How about I pay you back with breakfast instead?”

Pink lips, pink cheeks- and Damen decided that he really didn’t care- and then he kissed Laurent.

It was gross, and they both knew it- and yet despite being his worst, it was also the best kiss of his life. Laurent was warm- and soft and plaint and really not as uptight as he projected himself to be. Sparks made their way through every inch of his body, and Damen cursed oxygen and respiration and anything that forced them to part for even a second.

“Sounds like a date.” Breathed Damen, already realizing how cheesy he sounded yet unable to truly care about it.

Besides, Laurent’s laughter made it worth it.