#it reminded me of what spyro Felt Like to exist in in...

[hog-guy]

neon wh*te is soooo good but the line-to-line writing is obnoxious. so beautiful. so stylish. perfect recreation of exploring liminal spaces in a ps1 game. and the writers fuck with the vibe by chucking in "aight imma head out bozo #bozoisoverparty " bullshit every 5 minutes. the plot is fine but it's not really worth it

[anonymous149]

Ch5 War

AN: My teacher doesn’t like fanfiction because he thinks that all people do on fanfiction is just steal works and that’s not true! I’m writing a queer love story between two dragons because I want them to kiss each other!

Spyro's descent into the Fire Realm plunged him into a maelstrom of blistering heat, the fiery embrace wrapped around him like an infernal shroud. The air hung heavy with the acrid scent of sulfur, mingling with the smoky aroma of smoldering embers. With every powerful beat of his wings, Spyro rode the warm updrafts as he descended onto the rugged, blackened terrain below.

Stretched before him was a vast expanse of scorched earth, a desolate canvas punctuated by jagged rock formations and scarred by deep crevices. Molten rivers of lava wound their treacherous way through the landscape, carving fiery channels in the ashen ground, their glow cast an eerie illumination over the desolation.

In the distance, colossal volcanoes stood sentinel, their peaks wreathed in billowing plumes of ash and fire. The resounding echoes of their internal fury reverberated through the realm, a ceaseless reminder of the omnipresent danger.

Within this searing wasteland, Spyro's gaze fell upon the citizens of the fire realm. Magnificent, scaled dragons, their eyes glowed with molten intensity, soared through the smoky air. With each exhalation, they left behind trails of shimmering embers, as they painted the sky with fiery constellations. Lava golems, colossal and deliberate, traversed the rocky expanse with a purpose that felt both calculated and ominous. Above them all, a phoenix danced in elegant spirals, its plumage aglow with a coruscating brilliance.

Suddenly, one of the dragons spotted Spyro and descended like a meteor. Spyro instinctively took a step back and prepared for a monumental clash, but the dragon instead let out a roar that echoed with a mix of strength and familiarity. "Spyro! I can’t believe you’re alive!"

Perplexed, Spyro looked at the red crimson dragon. "How do you know my name?"

“I’m your guardian, Ignitus!” The dragon declared with a sense of urgency.

“Never heard of you,” Spyro admitted, his tone laced with confusion.

Ignitus, though a tad hurt, pondered Spyro's words. “I suppose when you were reborn, you wouldn’t have remembered anything.”

“Reborn? Hold on, old guy, what are you talking about?”

“It’s Oldman, my name is Ignitus Gary Oldman, and you are Spyro Elijah Wood.”

Spyro's brow furrowed in disbelief. “Okay, now I know you’re crazy. My voice actor is Justin Long.”

A sigh escaped Ignitus. “I was afraid of this. I feared your passing, but if ever you returned, you wouldn’t be the same legend you were before. There’s much I have to teach you, my son.” The gravity of his words hung in the air and it carried a weight that Spyro could sense, even amidst the blazing tempest of the Fire Realm.

- Scene Change -

Back in the academy, Peril and Stealth Elf were deeply engrossed in the task of finding the perfect recruits for Peril's team. Within the cozy confines of Stealth Elf's home, they scrolled through a multitude of potential candidates, their expressions a mix of scrutiny and hopeful anticipation. After evaluating a staggering fifty original characters, Stealth Elf released a drawn-out sigh, her brow furrowed in frustration.

"These OCs, they're all just derivatives of existing characters, either gloomier or garishly colorful. And most of them seem absurdly overpowered," she lamented.

Peril, still grappling with the notion of being a team leader, confessed, "I sort of liked the sparkle dogs.”

“Everyone likes the sparkle dogs but they felt... a bit too god-like. We need something more grounded. Next!"

The next candidate, a fish-like creature, introduced herself as Mipha, a former Zora princess. Her story unfolded as she revealed a heartbreakingly poignant tale of love and loss that left her without her royal title. “My boyfriend who I thought was dead for 100 years came back to life just to dump me for my brother and his wife so now they’re in a ploy relationship and I’m single. Since my Brother is now king I figured it’d be best if I just get away from it all you know?”

Stealth Elf, with a keen eye for detail, discreetly marked a box labeled "Emotional baggage."

Peril's heart skipped a beat as she took in Mipha's presence. Her aquatic form was a testament to her ethereal beauty, adorned with delicate, light-pink scales that shimmered softly in the light. Her eyes, a profound shade of indigo, exuded both kindness and wisdom as they reflected a depth of emotion and compassion. Fins cascaded like silken waterfalls down her back, moving with an effortless grace, mirroring the gentle ebb and flow of water. Her regal tiara, a symbol of her heritage, rested atop her head with natural elegance, while an intricately designed sash cinched her waist, showcasing the artistry of her people.

Stealth Elf was curious about Mipha's abilities. "So, what can you do, princess?"

Mipha replied, "I'm a healer. I possess the power to mend any wound with my holy water. Additionally, I can control water itself, which proves useful in... certain situations."

Peril was intrigued, but also aware of her fiery nature. She asked, "Can you heal burned wounds?"

Mipha's response was confident, "Burns is one of the wounds I can heal most effectively. Rest assured, if any of our teammates suffer from your fiery breath, I'll mend them promptly."

Peril mumbled to herself, "It's not the fiery breath that I'm worried about."

Stealth Elf interjected, "You know what, you're hired! Peril, you'll be doing a lot of fighting, and having a healer will be crucial. Besides, Mipha could use some time to bond with another girl and put her past behind her. It'll be a valuable experience for both of you."

Peril was taken aback by the sudden decision. "Wait, what?"

"You're going to be a formidable team, trust me. Mipha, gather your belongings and meet us at the academy. I'll show you to your dorm once we're done here," directed Stealth Elf.

Mipha offered a graceful bow before departing, leaving Peril mesmerized by the elegance of her exit.

After a few more rounds of rejections, Coco arrived, already signed up by Stealth Elf. Their reunion was filled with warmth and camaraderie. Stealth Elf inquired about Coco’s brother. “Ah you know, just trying to get some sleep on the beach but always having to fight evil instead. I got kind of bored doing the same old so I thought why not be a Skylander for a change?

Stealth Elf couldn't contain her excitement. "Peril, you're going to love her! She's incredible!"

Peril, while slightly uncertain, mustered a smile as she trusted Stealth Elf's judgment. However, she was curious what Coco’s powers were so she asked about them. "So, what can you do?"

Coco explained, "I'm a techie or from where I came from, a tradie. Whether it's fixing, breaking, or building, I've got it covered."

Stealth Elf couldn't help but let out a delighted squeal. "This is going to be amazing! We've got a healer and a...what did you call it? Tradie, that’s right. Gosh, I sound so Australian."

“Oh yeah, one more thing. Mind if my pet came along as well?” Coco grabbed a pokéball and tossed it up in the air to reveal a Minccino. Both Stealth Elf and Peril couldn’t help but have hearts in their eyes when they saw the Pokémon as both of them stated how cute it was at the same time. Coco laughed as she spoke about it. “While on my journey of self-discovery, I came across a realm that had all of these animals in it and they were just giving them away. They like to fight and how can I say no to his cute little face?”

Stealth Elf couldn’t help herself but to say. “This is so cute, you’re both on the team. What’s his name?”

“I’m calling him Fluffkins.”

“That’s so cute.” Stealth Elf had to clear her throat. “I think we got a bit distracted there. You and Fluffkins meet up with Mipha at the academy. We’ll be with you shortly.” When they were gone Stealth Elf spoke to Peril. “I’m counting them as a duo.”

“Are you sure that’s a good idea? Fluffkins doesn’t seem like he could think for himself.”

“I just kind of want to get this over with. That just leaves us with one more. I was hoping to find Cynder but she hasn’t shown up yet.”

***

Ch1: https://www.tumblr.com/anonymous149/730023312048177152/unspoken-hearts-ch1-friend-or-foe?source=share&ref=anonymous149

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[awakeneddragon]

List of Kin Experiences

A while back, I decided to compile a list of various experiences that I’ve had that I consider to be at least slightly non-human in nature. I thought I would finally share it here. 

The basic layout/template was made by @a-dragons-journal, but the writing is my own.

Phantom Limbs: This is a common thing to experience in the otherkin community, and describes feeling limbs that are not physically there. Though my own experiences with this are quite tame in comparison to others (as some have reported being able to feel when these “limbs” are touched), this is something that I’ve gone through for many years without thinking too much of it. 

Feeling myself having claws/talons was a regular occurrence for me. Though I couldn’t “see” their specific appearance, I definitely knew they were there and was able to “move” them. This was an involuntary and consistent thing that happened. I remember being pretty insistent on keeping my nails long due to this, and it always felt wrong when they were clipped.

Feeling a tail was somewhat common as well, as were ears that would flatten or raise themselves depending on my emotions/what was happening around me. My teeth also sometimes felt sharper than they actually are. I don’t experience most of these as much as I used to, but not to the point that they’re rare.

Connection To Dragons: I’ve always had a large fascination with dragons. I'd become really attached to dragon characters in media and overall just connected with them more than other types of characters. 

I remember how I would sometimes imagine myself having a dragon form, and one of the imaginary friends I had was also a dragon. When I learned of the existence of roleplaying on the internet, my characters almost always had something to do with them (could transform into one, had a dragon ally, etc.) Whenever a movie, show, game, or whatever else depicted a dragon (no matter their role), my interest was immediately piqued. 

I became really interested in learning more about the different types and the many stories that have been written about them. I remember being upset when learning that a lot of the stories were of dragons being portrayed as cruel, selfish, and violent, as that didn't match my perception of them at all. I always saw them as these incredibly intelligent and gentle creatures that only attacked when threatened, or at least believed them to have more of a variety of personalities than what the media displays them to have. 

I would also cling onto anything that suggested the possibility of them existing elsewhere, either in the past or in the present. Even as a kid I believed in different dimensions and the possibility of "mythological" creatures existing in ones separate from ours or on separate planets. Anything that connected me specifically to dragons was always a delight as well, such as me learning that I was born in the year of the dragon. Though zodiacs to most people are often seen as dismissible nonsense, it truly meant something to me and admittedly still does.

Connection To Nature/Elements: Though it’s a fairly normal occurrence even for those who are non-otherkin, being out in nature is incredibly calming to me. However, what may set other people’s experiences and mine apart is the sense of familiarity I feel or the urges I experience in certain locations. There have been multiple occasions where I’ve told myself, “I swear I’ve been here or somewhere similar before”, despite the fact that I never actually have. 

With weather, nothing calms me more than being outside when it’s cold and windy. It’s a feeling of pure euphoria that I don’t really experience from anything else, and usually succeeds in making me feel like running around on all fours and just generally doing various animalistic things.

In terms of elements, I’ve always felt most connected to ice and wind, though occasionally I’ll feel a connection with water in terms of small bodies of it (rivers, streams, etc.) or storms.

Self-image: Though I often liked to imagine myself as a dragon when I was younger, this habit became much more significant when I acknowledged my draconity and remembered the appearance of my past form. Ever since this discovery, in my day to day life it’s impossible for me to see myself as entirely human. I know that I’m not, and there is no denying that fact for me. Whatever I’m doing; whether that be typing, walking, or eating… It’s become almost instinctual for me to envision my dragon form in the place of my human body. When I look in the mirror, my normal appearance just feels so unnatural in comparison to my kintype. 

Non-human Noises: Making noises that are more similar to the sounds an animal would make is something that I’ve been doing for as long as I can remember. It’s my instinctive reaction to a lot of emotions. Snarling, growling, and hissing are all sounds that I commonly make, though on rare occasions I have made low rumbles that could be considered some sort of purr. Making and listening to these sounds is comforting to me. You can hear an example of some of the noises I make in my blog.

Movement/Expression: I don’t think I could even give an accurate number to the amount of times I’ve wanted to walk on all fours. I haven’t attempted to in a long time since I know it won’t be as satisfying as I’d like it to be, but imagining it feels so much more natural than walking on two legs. 

Another notable thing for me is how unnatural it sometimes feels to use forks and spoons when eating. It doesn’t really matter what it is; I usually prefer to eat things with my hands. As you can imagine, I’ve always been a bit of a messy eater, though I do at least know now to keep my manners in check. 

When experiencing anger, I often feel the urge to bare my teeth and/or dig my nails into whatever they’re in contact with.

In addition to this, I got in the habit of copying the movements of various dragon characters (Toothless, Spyro, Draco, Haku, etc.) They always felt more “right” to me.

Combat Instincts: The few times I’ve had a heated interaction with someone, I often felt the urge to claw them instead of punching them like most other humans would do in a fight. In fact, when I was a very young kid, my first instinct was to scratch people that made me upset/uncomfortable. I’m glad that I've grown out of that habit, but it was another reason that I disliked my nails being short. I saw them as the default/best method to defend myself.

Flight Instincts: Though I’m sure many wish to fly, I’m unsure if it often reaches the intensity of the desires that I often feel. Whether I’m outside or simply seeing an image where the sky is present, my very first instinct is to fly. It’s not simply a want; it’s something that I truly believe I was able to do at some point. I can very vividly imagine and “feel” what it’s like to experience the wind against my “fur” and see the ground far beneath me. This urge usually arrives in my mind before reality sets in and reminds me that flying isn’t possible with this form, and it’s something that gives me a deep level of sadness that is unmatched by almost anything else. 

Prey Drive: This is a very rare thing for me, though I figured it was notable enough to include. On a few occasions when watching documentaries, I have been able to easily envision myself in the predators place. At the sight of the prey that it's chasing, I’ll feel the urge to sink my teeth and “claws” into them. Of course, I would never actually go out and harm an animal.

Shifts: In the otherkin community, the act of going through a shift refers to people who are temporarily feeling especially like their kintype in some way. I don’t personally experience a heightened sense of smell or sight like some others, but it is incredibly easy to see myself as my past form and I'll have an increased urge to do many of the things listed above.

Dreams: It’s become a common occurrence for dragons to in some way be involved with my dreams. Most of the time I’ll just simply come across dragons or humans that can turn into them, though occasionally I’ll have the physical appearance of my past form. I unfortunately don’t remember too much of the latter dreams, but I do know that even in the dream world, this made me incredibly happy. It just felt correct, and I remember feeling a strong sadness when waking up.

Memories: I know that the human mind can make fantasies seem incredibly possible and/or real, so I take all of these memories with a grain of salt. However, I have had several experiences that could be considered memories of some sort. Below I’ll list some notable ones.

The very first memory I had depicted my past form in a "hallway" (I don’t know how else to describe it) that was made entirely out of snow and ice. I remember being able to vaguely see my reflection on the floor, and I looked up to see a blinding white light that I'm assuming was the exit before I started to run towards it.

My second memory was myself being in a forest full of leaves on the ground. I was on top of a slope, which I skidded down. I vaguely recall there being a nearby river.

Another memory depicted me in a snowy landscape. It was in the middle of the night and I was flying high in the sky.

I also had another memory at night/late afternoon, but the sky was just bright enough for me to see dark clouds. I was standing in an open field and looking around. It was pretty windy, as well; like it was about to storm. It's a very peaceful memory for me, despite the bad weather.

The most recent one I had yet again has to do with the night, but relied more on feelings and strong urges than sight. I was running in a forest, potentially chasing after/hunting something. It felt very cool and the overall atmosphere of it was very “wintery”. 

My first memory is what gave me a basic idea of what I looked like, though it wasn’t until in other memories where my appearance was consistent that I was more confident in myself. Funnily enough, before these memories I actually didn’t think that much of eastern dragons. It wasn’t that I disliked them, but they simply didn’t cross my mind that much due to western dragons being a much more common depiction in media.

Hoarding: This is the stereotype for dragons and something I see many dragonkin discussing, but it’s something I actually don’t relate with too much nowadays. However, when I was a kid, I would collect practically anything I could find around the house or outside. Rocks (that I would often insist were rare even though they clearly weren’t), rubber bands, beads, etc. These are all things that most people would consider worthless, but at the time they were special to me and I kept all of these items in a box that I was quite protective of.

Dens/Small Spaces: I remember when I was a kid, my mother and I built a pillow fort. I would hide and curl up inside it at every opportunity, as it made me feel incredibly content and safe. I have a similar urge whenever I see dens in movies and games. If I’m playing something that has caves, dens, or any other kind of small area, it’s very common for me to stop whatever I’m doing to just relax in these locations for a while.

And that concludes the list. I may update this whenever I recall anything else I find worth mentioning. My journey of being dragonkin has definitely been an interesting one, and I’m glad that I decided to become more involved in the community. Aside from some difficult times, being otherkin has had an overall positive impact on my life. It’s resulted in me meeting new people, feeling a sense of closure with myself that I’ve been lacking for as long as I can remember, and learning new things about dragons and the cultures of various places around the world.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Surveys #431-432

two biggins’ in one, beware the long post.

Do you own any Funko Pop! figurines? No. How many cats and dogs have you had as pets in your lifetime? I couldn't possibly count the cats. A lot. We've had I wanna say eight dogs through my entire life. Can your mom and/or dad play any instruments, or how about anyone else in your family? No. My older sister played the clarinet in school, though. Have you ever colored in an adult coloring book as a stress reliever? I have, but they don't really affect my stress level. Can you crack crab legs without a tool? UGH EW I hate crab legs. So mushy and just... ew. I don't think I've tried to without a tool. How many light sources are in the room you’re in? Excluding the natural light out my windows, three. What’s your favorite thing to put on bagels? Just your usual cream cheese. Who’s your favorite director? Tim Burton. I love his style. Bats: cute or gross? Bats are SO goddamn cute. What was the last really intense pain you felt? I had a sudden pain in my chest the other day that scared me quite a bit. Would you rather vacation by a beach or a lake? A lake, for sure. How would you feel about traveling abroad alone? I'd be way too lonely. What is your father's middle name? John. Where did your last kiss take place? The airport. Which movie villain do you find the most terrifying? Probably Jason. A masked guy just casually pursuing you with a knife is horrifying to me. If you married your favorite celebrity what would your last name be? Fischbach alskdfla;wer;lkwera;wle Do you stick your tongue out often in pictures? No. Which one of your family members are you closest to? My ma. Would you rather have name brand shoes or name brand clothes? Shoes. It's very important for them to be comfy for me. Are you a good liar? Yes. :x Are you proud of your parents? Yeah. If you could get backstage tickets to ANY concert - which would you pick? If Mom was with me, Metallica. She would actually fucking die if she met them. Like she cried and laughed with joy when she found out about the concert in Raleigh some years ago, and we thought we were going to go, but yeah, money. Which is better: orange or grape soda? Orange cream soda. Grape soda is so gross. Was the last thing you ate hot or cold? It was room temperature. Who was the last person in your house who isn’t family? Our landlord/family friend. I think. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Can you remember the last song you listened to? I'm listening to "Thoughts & Prayers" by Motionless In White right now. Have you ever been dumped really harshly? Ha, that is a colossal understatement... Can you do a back flip, or anything else of that sort? Definitely not. I couldn't even do stuff like that as a kid. Do you have any exes you can’t stand anymore? No. What happened to cause you to feel that way about them? ^ Are you more of a phone or a computer person? Computer, for sure. Do you have a job, and if so, where do you work? No. If not, do you want one? Not right now. I want to focus on the gym and getting in shape. Do any medical afflictions run in your family? A whole lot. What’s your favorite Mexican dish? Shrimp quesadillas. Or rice with cheese sauce. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? Yeah, hockey and baseball. Do you prefer pads, tampons or something else? I'm actually conflicted on this right now. I use tampons, but there are reasons I don't really like them and am considering something else. Have you ever ordered a specially made cake from a cake shop? Not me myself, but Mom has. What months were you and your siblings born in? My two immediate sisters were born in April and June. What did you have for dinner last night? Uhhhhh... I want to say I had a chicken pesto bowl? Have you ever had sex in/on a vehicle? No, that sounds so uncomfortable. Do you do anything to groom your eyebrows? No. I don't care about that anymore. Has your town ever flooded? Oh, for sure. Hurricane Floyd from when I was... I wanna say two or three WRECKED my area. Have you ever played at the McDonald’s play place? Yeah. That was a blast as a kiddo. Have you ever taken a picture of snow? Yeah. Do you cry easily? Very. Are you happy with where you live? No. The suburbs suck. I miss living in the country so much. Do people ever mistake you for being a different race? No. Do you hate the last person you kissed? No, she's my best friend in the whole world. What genre is your favorite movie? I actually don't know what it's considered? It's a kids movie, though. Who was the last person you were in a car with? My mom. Do you like the picture on your license/I.D. card? My permit picture is fucking hideous. When was the last time somebody hit on you? *shrug* Was the last person you met a male or female? A guy - my personal trainer. What brand is your underwear? I'm in my pjs, and only a madman would wear underwear to bed. What’s your favorite Thanksgiving food? Just the rolls, really, lol. I'm not a big fan of Thanksgiving foods at all. Do you have a TV in your room? No, because I don't watch TV. Are any of your electronics charging right now? My laptop always is, though I know you shouldn't do that. I need to charge my phone, too. What was the last video game you played? Video game, not computer, I want to say uh... The Legend of Spyro: Dawn of the Dragon? What’s the biggest promise someone’s ever made to you? Did they keep it? To never leave me. He didn't. Google, Bing, or Yahoo? Google. What was the last song you had on repeat? The song I mentioned earlier. Who is your favorite person to watch on YouTube? Markiplier. :') How many college degrees do you want? It'd be nice to have a Bachelor's in SOMETHING, but I'm not returning to school. Three tries was enough money down the drain. Can you wink? Yeah. Do you own any jerseys? No. Have you ever tried to snort Pixie Stix as a child, or even an adult? Uh, no. Do you like going to baby showers? Do you go only for the cake? No. The last time Jason and I hung out in any capacity was his brother's wife's baby shower, and it's a bad memory. As well, it just reminds me of what I once wanted with him. I'll go to them and be okay, but definitely not thrilled. Has there ever been a time in your life, you felt sexually undecided? Yes, especially in the I want to say 8th grade. I had an inescapable crisis that literally lasted a whole week (or maybe more) forcing myself to believe I was straight, despite already showing but denying bisexual attractions. I was religious back then, so believed if I wasn't straight, I'd go to Hell. Then I came out as bisexual in uhhhh... 2018 I wanna say, and that was a long examination of my feelings. It felt like a massive weight off my shoulders when I accepted it. I felt legit happy. Do you think tattoos and piercings are sexy on the opposite sex? ugggghhhhh yes Do people ever ask you to do things they’re too short to accomplish? No. What color are the headphones you have at this moment in time? My earbuds are pink and white. Ever choked severely on something during lunch at your school? No. Do you eat more vegetables or fruits? What’s your favorite fruit/veggie? Fruits, for sure. My fave is strawberries. What would you say is the color of your favorite bra? I have a pink and black lacy one that is super cute, but it's too small for me right now. It just stays in my drawer. Is anyone in your family a firefighter? Who is it anyway? No. What do you usually buy when you go to the dollar store? If I'm stopping there for a snack (which is usually the only time we stop by one), I tend to get a honeybun. Ever peed in the pool? Be honest! No, that is so gross. When you’re older, what kind of house do you want to live in? I want a medium-sized house that's semi-isolated in the woods. I'd love a nice path to walk down and take photos, a catio for Roman or whatever cat I may have in the future... stuff like that. I need lots of nature. Where do you want to get married? In some sort of gothic building, though I'm sure that would be a WILDLY expensive venue, so I doubt that'll happen. Realistically, either in the woods or even a massive flower garden. Do you plan on having both your parents at your wedding? Yes. What is your favorite childhood TV show? Pokemon. Honestly, do you like school? No, I didn't. Last thing that made you cry? PTSD. Honestly, are you keeping a big secret right now? No big secrets, no. Last person you took a walk with? Sara, years ago. Have you ever liked someone who didn’t like you back? Oh, have I... Who was the last person to actually pick you up in the air? Probably Jason, honestly. Does any part of your body hurt? My non-existent abs are killing me from exercising yesterday. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a regret what would you do? While it's tempting, hand me the cash. Can you keep a secret? Absolutely. You tell me a secret, you can guarantee I'll be keeping it between you and me. Your favorite romantic movie? The Notebook. How do you feel about Valentine’s Day? I honestly like it. I love the aesthetic of it, and I know people say "well you should celebrate love every day," and while that's right, what's so wrong about nationally designating a specific day to appreciate it? I think it's a very cute holiday. Who was the last person you took a picture with? My sister Katie. Do your jeans have rips, tears, and holes in them? I haven't worn jeans in yeeeeaaaarrrrssss. When I did though, I loved jeans like that, especially for skinny jeans. Do you celebrate 420?No. Have you ever kicked a vending machine? No. How do you eat Oreos? I prefer to just dip them in milk. If that's unavailable, I separate the two parts, eat the cream, and then the two cookies. Do you wear your shoes in the house? No. Would you survive in prison? Absofuckinglutely not. It's dark, but just to be entirely honest, I'd probably find a way to kill myself. Ever been to Georgia? I've been through it. Do you get your hair cut every month? Not every month, no. It needs a trim right now badly, though.

Current relationship in detail. I'm single and should be. If you were kicked out of your house, who would you call/go to? My dad. List things you spend money on in an average week. Nothing. Rate each of your sexual partners (if any) from 1-10. He was honestly a 10 lmao like I don't have a lot of experience at all, but yeah. Post the last FB group/page that you joined. I actually don't remember because I've been on break from Facebook for around a month. Would you parents be mad if you were in a relationship? No... Think of the last person you had sex with. Do you think they’ve slept with anyone else since they last slept with you? I'm sure he has. He dated someone right after me for like... eight months or something? Is there someone that you believe you will always be attached to? I think that's very obvious by now. What board games are you good at? Idk, I don't really enjoy board games. Is there a sport/hobby you keep thinking about taking up, but that you’ve never quite gotten around to starting? Definitely no sports, but I've been wanting to get back into video editing. I just... haven't, even though I have the software. Do you think pranks like egging/toilet-papering someone's house are funny or immature? They're incredibly immature. I see zero humor in them. Do you think “sleeve tattoos” are a good idea? They're hot as fuck, man. Is there anything in particular that your parents argue about? What? I'll just say they're divorced for good reasons. Do you ever actually read the “Terms and Services” when you sign up for websites and such? No. If you have a handheld games console (a DS or GameBoy, for example), how often do you use it? Almost never. Your phone is ringing. It’s the person you fell hardest for, what do you say? Realistically, I wouldn't answer because I don't answer numbers I don't recognize. Hypothetically, if I knew it was him, I'd probably say something along the lines of, "Hey J, are you okay?", because something must be seriously wrong if he wants to talk to me of all people. If your best friend was kicked out, would your parents let him/her live with you? Mom absolutely would. Are you afraid of falling in love? I'm terrified of it. Is there anybody you wish you could be with right now? I wish I didn't. Have you ever kissed someone & wished you didn’t? Yes: Tyler. Did you get kissed last night? Haven't been kissed in years. Do you enjoy going through a carwash? Bring out the rainbow soap and it's hype lmao. How did you get most of your scars? My cat, ha ha. He sometimes plays way too rough, and I just scar very easily. Ever had to take an inkblot test? Yes, when I went to a psychologist. Have you ever been in trouble for something you honestly didn’t do? Maybe? Have you ever seriously slapped someone in anger? My sister as a kid on her arm. Safe to say I got in trouble for it. What/who woke you up this morning? Just my body. Who was the last person to be in your bedroom besides you? Mom. What’s one of your locked text messages? da;lsd;fakwer I have one locked from Sara that says something like, "You are so beautiful." I cried. Have you ever finished a game of Monopoly? I think? Jason and I used to play the digital one you could download on the PS3. Is there anyone you know who’s in any way paralyzed? No. I mean, I know of a girl who went to my school who was paralyzed from the waist down in an accident, but I didn't/don't know her personally. She was a MASSIVE deal in my education community. Like you would see "prayers for (name)" on school and church signs. The truth all comes out when someone is drunk, true? Usually true. I sometimes think back on the one time Jason was drunk, and he just told me in the most adoring voice, "I love you, Brittany." It's painful as fuck to remember. I really do wonder if he meant it, given this was in the later half of our relationship. When was the last time you felt disappointed in yourself? Constantly. How about feeling disappointed in someone else? I dunno. For you, do you commonly feel more jealousy or envy? I definitely experience envy more often. Do you rely on the heads/tails flipping of a coin sometimes for decisions? No. Do you have any specific chores you do around the house? I'm supposed to empty the dishwasher in particular. For you, does comfort or fashion come first in dressing? Comfort, 100%. Have you had two friends that absolutely hated each other? No. Do you like Laffy Taffy? I do. That sounds pretty good right about now. Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners? Electric. Are your biceps at all noticeable? Yeah, no. Have you ever seen a walrus? Yeah, at SeaWorld as a kid. Did you ever have one of those Easy Bake ovens as a kid? Yeah. My little sister in particular was obsessed. Does your bathroom have a theme to it? No. From inside of your house, how many doors lead outside? Two. Are there a lot of trees in your yard? No. :/ I miss that. Have you ever liked someone that treated you like crap? No. Have a best friend? Yeah. :') Does it bother you when your best friend does stuff without you? That is so childish. Everyone needs space sometimes. But to answer the question, considering she lives many states away from me, obviously not. Is there a secret you’ve never told your parents? Yes. Does anyone hate you? I wouldn't at all be surprised if Jason does. Colleen might, but I really don't give a shit if she does. What’s the one thing you regret more than anything? The way I spoke to Jason after the breakup. If only I could take those letters back. Do you remember important dates? I am VERY bad at dates, doesn't matter how important they are. What’s some lyrics from a song that means a lot to you? "For such a little thing, you sure are in your own way" from a Mother Mother song. Who gives the best advice? Sara. Who do you usually see in your dreams? :) Jason is nearly a permanent fixture. Jeez, I'm bringing him up a lot in this one. I'm surprised my PTSD isn't dragging me into a pit for it. What type of cake did you last eat? Uhhh I wanna say double chocolate? Mom got two slices from the store for me and herself a long time ago. How many of your friends are gay or bisexual? A large number. I don't feel like counting. What’s your favorite type of sandwich? Just your usual peanut butter and jelly. When was the last time someone asked you out? Did you accept or decline? Years ago by Girt. I accepted. Do you like The Offspring? Sure, I like a handful of their songs. One pillow or two? I sleep with two. Do you like Mad Libs? Sure, they can be funny. Are you suicidal? Well damn, just throw that in there. Anyway, no. I'll admit I've had very brief, passive thoughts very rarely as of the late, just wondering if there really is a point to me being here, but I'm not actively suicidal at all rn. Where do your grandparents live? They're dead. When alive though, they lived in Florida and Michigan. Do you cut yourself? And this one? No, I haven't in many years. What is your pet’s name? Roman and Venus. Have you ever been to Canada? No, but I'd love to visit. Aren’t babies overrated? "Overrated" is definitely the wrong word... I don't particularly find a lot of babies cute and I don't want my own, but they're not overrated. Have a built-in pool in your backyard? Never have. Ever won yourself a stuffed animal? Yeah. Ever had someone else win you a stuffed animal? Yes. Ever been to a circus? No. I wouldn't set foot into one. Ever shot animals? I never, ever could. Do you consider yourself intelligent? I USED to. I think I'm dumb as shit now. School knowledge did not latch onto me well, I guess. Have you ever run away from home? Yes. It was so overdramatic. I came back hours later because I had my phone and Mom texted me threatening to call the cops. Do you put family first, friends, relationships, school, or something else? I will never put my mental health behind anything/one again. What’s something you’ve stood up for in the past? When Colleen and I were friends in middle school, we both spoke before the class in absolute disgust at how our classmates were treating our poor substitute teacher. Colleen had AT them, while I was more tame about it but still wanted to bash into their heads that they were all being absolute trash to the poor man. What’s something you worked extremely hard to get? My mental wellbeing. Granted, I'm not exactly "well" now, but once upon a time I was living in the deepest ocean trench as far as depression goes. Are you satisfied with your body image? Hell no. I really, really, really hope loyally going to the gym will help me with that. Have you ever been labeled negatively or otherwise been called something extremely derogatory? Not that I know of. Have you ever seriously taken advantage of someone or been taken advantage of? No. Have you ever been seriously ill? Mentally, immensely. Physically, not really. I've had some nasty stomach bugs, but nothing truly severe. Have you ever befriended a former enemy? Ha, it's funny, I used to hate Jason's first ex/heartbreak for how badly she hurt him. Like she could've been falling off the face of the earth with only me to save her, and I'd let her keep falling. I hated her. Yet now we're Facebook friends and comment on each other's stuff like it's nothing, ha ha. She reached out to me a few years ago to apologize for high school stuff (she also hated me for Juan - her ex or something along those lines - being interested in me instead of her), we chatted a bit, and now I think she's great. If you’re not religious, would you ever pray as a last resort? If you are religious, do you often pray for other people? I don't pray anymore. That's all I'll say to keep this from becoming potentially very offensive. Have you ever dated someone, then after you dated they came out of the closet or switched (for lack of a better word) sexual orientation? I'm pretty sure my middle school boyfriend Aaron is gay, but I'm not certain. He vanished from Facebook a long time ago. Has a boy/girl ever walked a ridiculous distance just to see you? How about vice versa? I tried doing that the night of the breakup. By car, I know it was a seven-minute drive, but walking there, never mind at night, was ludicrous. I only didn't manage because after a few minutes, Mom came after me and kept cutting me off with the car. When was the last time you felt really uncomfortable? Right now. My abs REALLY hurt, and I'm also cramping like a motherfucker after not having a period for 3+ months because of TMS therapy. I'm still pissed about how it had a physical effect on me, but didn't mentally do what it was meant to. Is there anything that your mom is really known for as to how she is as a person? She is very, very loving and lives to help others. Who have you been talking to the most today? Nobody, really. I've spoken with Mom obviously, but for the most part, today's been quiet. Are you nosy? I can be pretty damn nosy, yes. What’s the meanest thing you have done to a friend? Consistently flirted with her boyfriend behind her back. I was 12, okay? If your ex called you crying, what would it most likely be about? THE ex, I have no idea. I don't know what's going on in his life, besides his mother dying quite a few months ago, but I don't see why he'd contact me about that. Who was the best kisser out of all the people you have kissed? Jason. Have you ever been told that you have an annoying laugh? No, but I think I do.

[imadeletingmysocials]

My scores for E3, because apparently now i’m a dumb 4channer who thinks this /v/ meme shit matters, like it’s not gonna affect sales or anything it’s pointless as all hell [this is lenghy, but hear me out ok]

EA: 

4/10 - people will probably play the games regardless of how shitty this presentation was but... It felt pretty insulting. 

Battlefield V is probably gonna make a lot of money regardless cuz people like war games and it seems pretty well done, the more footage they have shown seemed better than their weird advertizement that made world war 2 seem very wacky, which honestly regardless if you’re a sexist neckbeard or not, seemed like a poor advertizement move. 

TinyBuild:

No one watched this lol and it was just 1 GAME and a fun cute musical that made people who aren’t strong enough to musicals die, 6/10 because it made nerds die and their song is catchy, i dont really care about their 1 game.

Microsoft:

 9/10 - I'm giving this much of a high score because I would play practically almost all of these games showcased (they’ll probably be available on PC which I’m biased for cuz I have a gaming PC), no kidding, I pretty much liked everything I saw and it was fairly straight to the point. Many gamers don’t appreciate the finer details of each game and think they’re generic but that’s just fanboys who haven’t played a single game outside of their favorites. 

Also my cousin uses those Xbox One netflix rip offs that gives you games so i’m happy for him. The presentation had a lot of diamonds in the rough games that will I will probably appreciate more over time (they might even become cult classics like Metro or Dying Light) than any of other games at other e3s. As for the stuff I won’t be playing: It’s mostly harmless so eh.

There was an abundance of trailers! It was like one after the other, pure goodness, it seems as if they left out all of the Sports games to EA to present and the only thing they showed that might not be anyone’s cup of tea was “Forza”, but honestly? I appreciate it, it seems like a good racing game even if I’m not one to buy racing games.... But the more you think about the number of good games presented, the less you’ll think about that, I mean they showed DEVIL MAY CRY 5!!! 

...The Funko Pop game made me scream though.

Bethesda: 

8.5/10  I cannot deny that these are games I will want to play regardless if they’re good or not. Sad to see nerds not enjoy the opportunity to meet ANDREW W.K. but I’m glad all of the divisions they own are making sequels to stuff I already like, so pretty much Bethesda played it safe.

Devolver Digital:

 8/10 It’s like that one b-movie film your college students made and you had a laugh with creating.

Square Enix: 

5/10 seriously, 30 minues of just trailers? Most of which we saw?? I guess it could be worse but who uses E3 screentime for mostly MMORPG deals! The new stuff was too vague to be excited about too.

Ubisoft: 

7/10 - I liked it when they made funny quirky things and their games are probably gonna be okay like usual, Ubisoft has dedicated fans that like their collectathon games they release every year, and it’s usually that one game you play when you’re bored and got nothing else, it’s okay. 

Gamers hate fun and dancing and all that stuff but I kind of find stuff like that exciting, while nerds who never went outside and who are sensitive as all hell to any representation of fun find it “cringey”. A panda dabbed, and that settles it, Ubisoft was the only E3 Brave enough to dab this year. 

PC Game Conference (it was fairly long):

I know none of you watch this one cuz y’all fake as hell but listen... Fuck you LOL, these are the type of games people actually play over 400 hours and really get people’s money. Like these are games built to last that might be on the best-selling Steam front page for MONTHS, like how Frostpunk was comfirmed last year during this conference, PC Gaming has been known for sleeper hits that nobody knows about (because the attention goes to cinematic experiences on consoles most of the time) but suddently everyone’s playing it. 

PC gaming has always been an alternative lifestyle and seeing as many people didn’t watch this one, that just proves the point that it still relatively alternative. Maybe it’s because everyone sounds dumb as fuck when saying “PC GAMER MASTER RACE” and acting like an elitist. 

The PC Gaming conference is always more of a talk show than a regular E3 which is why I respect it every year, fuck the hyperactive gamers that just wanna see flashy trailers, this one’s more SOPHISTICATED!! It feels a lot more human and less artificial. Either way, lot’s of what you might’ve expected: Simulators and Survival games you’ll probably spend 3 years playing until they make a better minecraft clone. 

Gamers like to act as if they’re tired of Battle Royale (already? It’s a new fad it still is here to stay for a little more) but the numbers and success of it doesn’t lie that it isn’t a fad that proves itself to be highly tempting to try out for developers. Go cry to valve that they didn’t release Half-Life 3 cuz you haven’t played any other FPS game without even researching that Valve pretty much fired all of it’s developers and you’re just being annoying.

I feel as if I need to comment what I saw at this e3 cuz nobody watched, they made a mod I liked from skyrim into a fully-ass game, they’re rebooting Star Control which not a single gamer today knows of, the HP Lovecraft open world detective game also seems very good. YAKUZA IS COMING TO PC!!!!!!!!! Killing Floor 2 stuff, Road Redemption stuff, SHARK RPG, cute indie games, Jeff Goldblum was there, Wall-E with a gun in VR which seems to have promissing good vr design by Insomiac games (yes the spyro people), 2 games about Taxi driving... Like sure I think it’s a good format for story telling but.

A cell-shaded art game, star citizen is still being made, and it’s gone to the point nobody really wants it anymore even if it’s... Still being made you know? So most guys are wrong that it was gonna be canceled. After that was the technical graphic card stuff which gamers don’t have enough capability to understand, stuff like 9k laptops that SELL a lot mind you. Rich people love that technical stuff. 

A space defense sim game, Don’t Starve Sequel, Just Cause 4 detailed explanation of the engine, Overkill’s The Walking Dead gameplay which has been in development hell for years now now has a release date, I discovered Clementine’s voice actor is white... Go figure, a literal pixelated roguelike (not what you think it is, it’s Noita), 

Theme Hospital REBOOT!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And the doctors were cute. Probably one of the funniest games presented... Followed by REALM ROYALE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That harvest moon clone with a cute art style is still being made: Ooblets, no release date sadly. Anno is still going, cyanide and happiness still exists? and they’re making a battle royale? lol okay. How was Hitman 2 not announced during Square Enix?? Anyways it’s here at the end, the trailer was amazing and it’s coming out this year. 

I don’t have that much strong feelings because it’s just a normal conference and not a special one you know? But I’ll give it a 8/10 or 7/10 im not sure cuz I seem to like most games and I found Frankie cute.

Sony: 

Yo usually Sony makes like a huuuuuuuge thing about their conferences (like this year they didn’t even showcase indie games) but this year they started from a church for the sake of immersion?? It reminded me a little of their first E3s during the 90s, and it almost felt like a indie gathering for musicians, I swear to god, Sony is borderline experimental trying to balance out their E3 across stages. Jeb played the banjo and people just ACCEPTED it... AND THEN someone played some JAPANESE FLUTE? aRT. It might come off as a bit arrogant for some tho.

Nerds hated it and thought it was bizzare, which is why it means it’s good. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH BITCHES. Anyways could have been a little more fast-paced... But then again when it was fast-paced it was just like: Huh? What was that? I’m a big Resident Evil Fangirl, RE2 was my childhood but ignoring that for a sec: finally, Death Stranding gameplay, remins me of shadow of the colossus but post-apocalpytic, survival horrorish and abstract sci-fi.

 Kind of feels more Metal Gear than MGSV did already Cuz Norman Reedus sounds like snake a lot more than the 24 hours guy, and because from what I’ve seen in the footage, someone acts like Otacon to “Sam”. I think most now can figure out the plotpoints of this game with what has been established. I might be a bit sad at the fact that this will be a PS4 exclusive just like Metal Gear Solid 4, which I still haven’t played fully because it’s PS3 exclusive and I only have a gaming PC. 

Also this E3 was surprisingly entirely SINGLE PLAYER, I sorta don’t believe in the “single player doesn’t exist” myth honestly, especially now. I’m not sure if that makes Sony’s E3 better or worse, maybe it needed more variation, like I’ve commented, usually they have an indie showcase which this year did not. There were few games shown but for what it was worth, it’s still interesting... But yeah just 5 games? No Spyro? (easy picking), nothing extra? I can understand why many people felt this E3 was upsetting.

8/10.

Nintendo

Here it is, the most overhyped developer of all of E3, the source of “Nintendo wins E3 by doing nothing” memes because Nintendo fans really don’t care about anything except Nintendo and then act surprised when they only care about Nintendo when they try to be a little more open-minded (and fail) even if other E3s probably make more games built to last in comparisson, cuz we gay people only care about NINTENDO YOU KNOW? Shade asside... 

I was pleasantly surprised this E3, it wasn’t just a series of okay at best releases, a strong 9/10. 

tHAT WAS WHAT I WROTE IN PREPRATION....

BUT THEN???? IT WAS JUST THAT??? NO PRIME 4 NO ANYTHING LIKE JUST 3 GAMES BASICALLY? (maybe there was 5 games but eh) I mean smash is good.. It’s pretty much just an update of the last smash, every character is REALLY FUCKING GOOD BUT.... JUST THAT? jeez.. Like, the only stuff I wanted from it was Mario Party and Smash... Okay maybe that 1 Mecha game. Also I guess fornite is now on Switch but I can play that anywhere else really.

I guess a 7/10 is all I can give to just Smash, if there was a little more I’d give it a 9/10 for sure but... ehh Just Smash? jeez, fuck... i MEAN I kind of get it, Nintendo doesn’t do “e3″ normally, they usually do 1 big game at E3 and then wait a couple of months to do that little seasonal announcement thing they do across the year, ugh.. Okay. Yeah I guess i shouldn’t have expected much. Still isn’t it weird that Miyamoto was in Ubisoft’s E3 but not this one??? what!

Anyways

[wozman23]

My 2020 in Gaming

I finished my 100th video game of the year yesterday. In a normal year that would be an embarrassing feat. By in 2020, pretty much stuck within these four walls for nearly nine months now, I'm really proud of it. The last few years, my gaming habits took a severe hit due to working too much. I was fortunate to have the finances to pick up the PlayStation VR and the Switch, but I couldn't dedicate a lot of time to them, and when I did, the joy wasn't there as much since I was often exhausted. In 2018, I still managed to get through almost 40 games, but last year that number fell to 25. There was so much I wanted to play, but I just didn't have the free time. And then 2020 dealt me a lifeline... When LA came to a halt, three and a half months into the year, I was only working on finishing Game #6. Since then, I've been on a tear. A large part of my efficiency came from two choices. In late April, I signed up for Xbox Game Pass for $1 for the first month. Then in June, the “Racial Injustice” Bundle with hundreds of PC games – about a dozen of which I really wanted to play - released on itch.io. Overall, it was a solid mix of AAA games and indie games, although I've skewed more toward indies for years now. There were big anticipated releases like The Last of Us, Part II and Doom Eternal. Splatoon 2 finally got the shrink wrap pulled off that it's been suffocating in for years. (It was fantastic, so I'm not sure why I waited so long.) There were massive games that I put dozens of hours into, like my 77 hours descending into the madness of Hades, or my 69 soaking in the world of Ghost of Tsushima, with a sizeable chunk of those hours being me just toying around with Photo Mode. (Props to the PS5 for finally telling you your playtimes via the OS.) There were dozens of small indie games that only took a few hours to complete – which is kind of my sweet spot these days. A few weighed in at just 30 minutes, like Swarm, a Steam game I found through Get Indie Gaming's Youtube channel, or Syphonia, a student project from ISART Digital that I was anticipating. There were games I replayed, like some of my favorites of all time, Psi-Ops: The Mindgate Conspiracy and Alan Wake, as well as the remastered versions of Ghostbusters: The Video Game and the Crash Bandicoot and Spyro trilogies. There was great stuff I paid for, and a few awesome games that I got for free through the Epic Games Store, or via subscriptions with PlayStation Plus, Game Pass Ultimate, or the times I took advantage of free trials of Amazon Prime. And I even got hooked on an online multiplayer only game, which has only happened on a handful of occasions in the history of online play.A lot of people are going to look back on 2020 as a terrible year, but for me it's been a godsend. It's allowed me to enjoy multiple passions, with gaming being one of the biggest. Like any hobby, my gaming habits over the years have ebbed and flowed. Overall, the last generation I've been fortunate to own every major console for the first time in a generation. Yet – outside of a few phenomenal games like Horizon Zero Dawn, ASTRO BOT Rescue Mission on VR, and the other aforementioned PlayStation first party titles – overall I wasn't really impressed as much with the AAA offerings. The indie scene is only gaining ground. But with the PS5, the proper return of my all-time favorite franchise, Ratchet & Clank, and my Game Pass renewed until 2022, I'm optimistic about where gaming is headed. As for my favorite games that released this year, here's my list: 1. The Last of Us, Part II 2. Battletoads 3. CARRION 4. Hades 5. ASTRO's Playroom 6. Filament 7. Fall Guys: Ultimate Knockout 8. Bugsnax 9. Ghost of Tsushima 10. Ori and the Will of the Wisps The Last of Us, Part II The original The Last of Us was my favorite game of the previous generation, as well as the most impressive game of all time. It was mind-numbingly good, so much so that I really did not want a sequel. I didn't even want to replay it. It was one of those things that just felt complete. Nothing more needed to be said, and in doing so, there would be a large risk at ruining what made it great. Slowly, Naughty Dog eroded away at me, and I began to anticipate the sequel. Right before it I even replayed the remaster of the original. Part II is one of those rare project that manages to one-up what you thought was already perfection. It's like a 30 hour blockbuster movie that just keeps ramping up in intensity. So much of what makes it special is within the design of its details: the way it presents itself, the pacing, its message. Like many, key details were spoiled by online trolls prior to launch, but it really didn't matter. This post could be just as long and be only about The Last of Us, Part II. (I still may write something up at some point.) There's just so much of it to dissect. But it's impossible to talk about without spoiling all of its magical moments. It simply offers a masterclass in game design and narrative flow. I really don't need a Part III, but should one exist, I know damn well I'll be there. Battletoads I loved the original Battletoads. I even replayed it, and beat it with the help of the Rare Replay rewind feature right after playing the new entry. It's practically impossible otherwise. When there was talk of a new game I was hyped. But when it was finally revealed, with a completely different art style, I was taken aback. Because of that, I went in to the new entry not expecting much. However, that stylistic choice is exactly what put it in the Number 2 spot in my list. The original Battletoads concept was created to ape the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and the original game felt much like the early TMNT brawlers. The new Battletoads doubles down though, expanding their empire to combat TMNT's cartoons. The game itself is a fairly straight forward 2D brawler, that looks and plays great, but the real stars are the cutscenes and the humor. It has this great Saturday morning cartoon vibe that I've never seen a game nail near as well. I don't watch a lot of the modern cartoons, but many have compared it to Rick & Morty. It's really quick, and silly, and feels exactly what a company should be aiming for if they wanted to create the next TMNT craze in the world today. Sure, the game itself is nowhere near perfect in all dimensions, but the way it tackles humor is really impressive and admirable. That's the main reason it occupies my Number 2 spot. CARRION CARRION reminds me a lot of INSIDE, typeset aside. INSIDE for me was this solid atmospheric game that at it's end became this awesome fever dream, but was over just when it was getting interesting. CARRION feels like INSIDE's spiritual successor. You play as this creepy creature, with all these grotesque tentacles, and you just run amok. It's just plain fun. Plus it's an insanely unique lifeform to play as, and there's nothing more I love than playing a game where you take on the role of some strange creature. Like many of the indie games I love, CARRION doesn't overstay its welcome. Over the few hours of its journey, it iterates, provides you with some unique challenges, they grabs its hat and coat and bids you adieu. There's nothing more I love than a game with that approach. Show me something cool. Make me play something that feels like something I've yet to experience in my over 30 years of gaming. Then get out of the way so that I can find another game that makes me feel that way. Kudos to Game Pass as well for partnering with the CARRION developers and offering the game on release day. I was looking forward to the game, but with so many games on my radar, I often simply can't get around to all of them. Had I needed to purchase CARRION, it might have had to wait in the wings for a while. I've played so many games on Game Pass this year that I may have otherwise never actually purchased, and many of them have found the ranks among my favorites from the last few years. Hades Up until now, I'd like Supergiant Games as a creative studio. I've played all of their games, and loved the artistry present in them. However, I've always felt like the gameplay was a bit lackluster. Not previously being a fan of roguelike games – although Game Pass has provided some great experiences there as well – I initially had no plans to buy Hades. But praise was unanimous, the Epic Store gave people a $10 coupon just for downloading Rocket League for free, and it was on sale for $5 off, so I scooped it up for $10. At first, I thought I had made a mistake. I wasn't really into it. But then it slowly started to sink its hooks into me. After about 30 runs, I'd finally vanquished Hades himself. And what was your reward: a brief encounter with your mother, followed by your death and cyclical return to The Underworld. And that's really where the brilliance of Hades comes in. In beating the game, you realize you have only scratched the surface. I played around 70 more runs. I got the full story from my mother. I tried out the different weapons. I played around with the perks and heat gauge. I maxed out the relationships with almost everyone. (I never got Demeter's final few dialog options to pop.) All along the way, I kept thinking, I'll quit after I do X, but then Y and Z would egg me on even further. I spent 77 hours in that world. Sometimes, with nothing to do during the day, I'd practically play all day long. No other game this year took up that much of my time. Few ever do. Not bad for a game I initially had buyers remorse for. ASTRO's Playroom I wasn't sure I was going to be able to get a PS5 at launch. I got lucky on release day thanks to the PlayStation Direct website. (Every other retailer is a giant hunk of shit, who doesn't care if they sell to an actually gaming fan or some asshole reseller.) Had I not secured an early PS5, it wasn't a big deal. Most of the games I wanted to play were coming to PS4 as well. The baked-in ASTRO's Playroom was the only exception. And there's always that extra special feeling of playing something right when it comes out. It's funny to think that the best PS5 game is given away for free with every console, but that is just the case. Much like ASTRO BOT Rescue Mission, which did wonders for showing off what PlayStation VR could do – it was my 2018 GOTY - ASTRO's Playroom shows off what the PS5 can do, primarily via the advancements of the DualSense controller and the solid state hard drive. I've never been one to care for graphics, and the PS5 will surely evolve over time, but those two details are what makes the device feel truly “next gen” so far. The way the triggers adjust tension is so wild. I really don't know how much they'll be used, but it's a cool option to have. And loading times are practically non-existent. (I've since went back to the Xbox One for a few more Game Pass releases, and loading times feel jarring.) As far as ASTRO goes, he's a terrific mascot in an age where mascot platformers aren't really a thing anymore. The experience relies heavily on nostalgia, as you collect relics of PlayStation's past. Also scattered throughout are other bots dressed up to reference other franchises. Dozens of franchises are represented, from characters like Crash, to Ratchet, to Kutaro from Puppeteer. It's really a lovely homage to PlayStation that any longtime fan will enjoy. Plus, it's a really fun game to play, with beautiful tech themed worlds, some infectious earworms, and some cool mechanics. Japan Studio has been a bit of an enigma for a while now. But the ASOBI Team is knocking it out of the park with ASTRO. ASTRO reminds me a lot of Iota from Tearaway: they're both cute mascot characters, crafted with a lot of love, from terrifically artistic games that did an excellent job of showing off new tech. I can't wait to see what ASTRO is up to next. Filament This one sat  near the top my Steam wishlist for nearly the entire year before I finally grabbed it about a week ago when it went on sale. I love a good puzzle game. Basically, you control a bot that tethers out a string-like filament that you use to interact with pillars. Sometimes you just make sure you graze the line by one; other times you loop around one. Sometimes you're simply turning a pillar on. Other times they must be linked in pairs, by color, or a specific number of times, just to name a few of the options. That's really where Filament glows. What starts of simple grows insanely complex by the end. You'll be combining mechanics in some rather brain-busting puzzle. And the game does very little to explain things to you, or help you along the way, yet it feels very inuitive. Still, many times I simply hit walls, where I was almost convinced the puzzles were impossible. In a few instances, it took a while to understand new rule sets. Eventually I solved every single puzzle without resorting to help. And it took me about 48 hours. (Granted I think my stat tracking was probably counting some idle time where I had the game running but walked away to do stuff like make a meal.) It's a surprising amount of content for a puzzle game that can easily be reduced to: solve puzzles by drawing lines. One other thing I appreciated was that I found myself taking notes and drawing things out on paper. That's a tactic I don't pull out often, but love when a game pushes me in that direction. One instance in particular even had me cut up squares of paper to piece together one of the secret text logs. By the way, I missed a ton of those logs. After completing the few I found, I did look how to unlock the rest, and some of the stuff there was absurdly complex. There's really not a lot to compare Filament to outside of The Witness. But if you like a really challenging puzzle game with a ton of content, give this one a look. Fall Guys: Ultimate Knockout I don't like online multiplayer games. They rarely hold my interest. I put quite a bit of time into Rocket League, Uncharted 2, Resistance 2 Co-op, and Fat Princess, but that's been about it. And in some of those cases, the main reason I spent a good amount of time with them is because I was unemployed during their reign. Overall, I'm not one to interact with people online. And I don't like the idea of a game dictating when I play it. But when Fall Guys was included with PlayStation Plus, I liked the look of it enough to give it a try. Getting a win took a while, but after the first one, I started to become pretty consistent with my runs. Much like Hades, I thought, “I'll just play until I get the trophy for 7 wins.” Then I set my sights on 20. Then I got hooked on collecting the costumes. By the time I'd finished my first stint in Season 1, I'd reached the max Level 30 and had every trophy except for the one requiring five wins in a row. I've given up hope there. Sony says I logged 40 hours with it, which equates to a lot of rounds. One day I went back for Season 2, and enjoyed the new levels, even though I was getting eliminated since I was sight-reading them. I don't know how much time I'll be putting in with it in the future should I find gaps in my list of games. Usually with multiplayer games, the focus fades once I unlock all the trophies I can. And I'm not sure how much time I want to dedicate to becoming proficient at future season. But the fact that Fall Guys even got that much attention from me to begin with is a testament to how much fun it is. Bugsnax Bugsnax could have been a joke. The previous game from Young Horses, Octodad: Dadliest Catch was just that: a silly romp that equated to little more than just a goofy control scheme. Bugsnax was the butt of many jokes upon reveal, reaching meme status in which it became the Schrödinger's cat of games. When someone talked about it looking good, you weren't sure if they were being honest or a hipster. I wasn't sure what to expect, but I was intrigued. It's another fine example of a list of stellar games that have been given away for free with PlayStation Plus. Would I have played it otherwise? Who knows? But I'm glad I got to. It is silly, but the silliness works in unison with what turned out to be a very fun game to play. The world and its characters are weird. Everybody has a laughable name, Filbo Fiddlepie, Chandlo Funkbun, and C. Clumby Clumbernut, just to name a few. ( I wonder what the C stands for?) The Bugsnax, which are part bug, part snacks, follow suit, with the burger inspired Bunger, the french fry spider, Fryder, or the popsickle, Bobsickle. The most delightful part is when you catch one of the bugsnax and you hear them say their name from the speaker in the controller. Hearing “Weenieworm” never got old. Any sound coming from Bunger put a smile on my face. Feeding the bugnsax to the other characters was a blast as well. Certain bugsnax resulted in sheer silliness, while combinations could provide interesting fashion statements. But past all that silliness was a fun game too. You're given a few different tools to capture bugsnax, and are sent to figure out how. By the time I was reaching the end, having done all there was to do, I was sad to see it end. It was simply a joy to platinum the game, and I'd definitely be down for more Bugsnax adventures. Ghost of Tsushima I love Sucker Punch to death. Sly Cooper is one of my favorite series. On the other hand, I've never been into the world of the samurai, or watched any samurai movies. But Sucker Punch is a studio I'm happy to support, and I figured I'd be getting a good quality game, so I was in. (Plus, I had the free time. At the time, I thought it might be my gaming binge swan song as I thought we'd be coming out of this pandemic in July. Boy was I wrong!) The world of Tsushima is breathtaking. The partnership of style and graphical fidelity creates beauty in every square inch of the world. As far as the game is concerned, it what I would expect from a AAA open world game. There are main missions, and side missions, and things to upgrade, and all kinds of places to explore. It's fairly predictable in that regard, although I did enjoy some of the ways it tackled many of those side missions. The haiku system was a relaxing alternative to combat missions. Foxes and birds always encouraged me to meander from the main missions. And shrines provides some nice platforming challenges. Combat was unique, and being about to cater it to your preferred combat style was appreciated. It did wear out its welcome a bit after dozen of hours, but I appreciate its simplicity. Still, most impressive was just that living, breathing world. I spent a lot of time in photo mode. A LOT! I could easily spend an hour or two just traveling around finding beautiful vistas to tinker around with lighting and effects. In the end, most of my complaints really just boil down to the fact that it's a large AAA game, and comes with the tropes and restrictions of the territory. Otherwise, it would be higher up the list. Ori and the Will of the Wisps Ori and the Will of the Wisps is a great game, but ultimately it's just more Ori. That's not necessarily a bad thing. It just doesn't really subvert expectations. Everything that made the first game great is here too. It looks gorgeous. It's fun to traverse and explore. But looking back, it doesn't stick out as fondly in my memory as many of the other games in this list. Some of that could be the fact that it released early in the year. It was the game I was playing when the world crapped the bed. But it could also just be that I prefer the intrigue of new IP over sequels. Even so, it's hard to discredit just how well it plays and how beautiful and rich that fantasy world is. Honorable Mentions (that released this year): Carto, Lightmatter, Swarm, Symphonia, Bartlow's Dread Machine, Doom Eternal, Control's AWE Expansion Honorable Mentions (I played that released years prior): Bomb Chicken, SUPERHYPERCUBE, Dead Cells, Moonlighter, Songbird Symphony, The Messenger, JUMPGRID, ETHEREAL, Spring Falls, Unruly Heroes, Celeste, Lonely Mountains: Downhill, Splatoon 2, My Friend Pedro, A Short Hike, Future Grind, SOMOS, A Plague Tale: Innocence, The King's Bird

[astralsecrets]

Dream - Saving A Sleepwalker & Prize Winning Artist & A Favour For A Favour

Date of Dream: MON 22 OCT - 2018 Dream No. 460 - Separated Sections Dream 460 A - Saving A Sleepwalker I don’t remember much about this dream. From what I can remember, it was pitch black in the middle of the night, the early hours of the morning to be exact. I remember being at the bottom of the stairs, weirdly my thoughts were still conscious but my actions were oblivious. As I opened the front door and went into the driveway, I was imagining like I was entering into the swamp of Spyro The Eternal Night. Then as I was actually on the driveway, fitting music played from the actual soundtrack but I also felt this sense of mysterious danger lurking about. Eventually, there was real danger in sight. A fire had broken out, bright orange, in the distance and I could hear sounds just like when the creatures dropped the bombs on the temple in the PS2 version of the game. I was scared out of my wits and my heart was pulsing very fast but once again, I couldn’t control my movement. I forgot to mention that when I was still down at the bottom of the stairs, I actually was aware of the fact that I was sleepwalking. Back to the current scene of the dream, I was freaking out big time and even felt at one stage like my life was about to end. Just as I was about to let out a scream, I literally only got in an initial gasp, when I was suddenly and swiftly grabbed, made to face the opposite direction, and pulled towards the house by an invisible force. All of a sudden, the urge to scream was gone and my heart pulse had slowed right down. As I was still standing on the pavement, the invisible energy showed itself as a very feint hologram… It was 18-Volt in his Game and Wario cover art appearance. He was shown in a hovering, sitting position, and so I knew what this meant. I was drawn to his lap and actually manoeuvred by the dream to sit on it. I can’t exactly describe it, it’s like the dream suspended me in mid-air, having me float redundantly in slow motion and then suddenly very quickly plonked me down onto him rather than the usual where I would climb up and seat myself. He then became invisible again and I couldn’t feel his lap or his arms, I now only perceived to be floating again but in that sitting position. Then he moved off. The front door swung open by itself and 18-Volt’s energy rushed me inside, flying me up the stairs at a rapid pace. Then the dream lapsed forward in time a bit. 18-Volt was now in his human form but as it was pitch black inside the house, I couldn’t see much in regards to colour. Once his energy had slotted me back into bed, that’s when he became human and gently placed the bed sheets to be just under my chin, patting them down on each side. The scene ended there. It was still pitch black in the house but now I was awake again and in the kitchen, talking to my brother in there. I was actually telling him the story of how I apparently found out I was sleepwalking earlier. I said something along the lines of “Whatever happened out there was absolutely crazy and I thought I was going to die. I was bloomin’ sleepwalking! But then let me tell you this… This guy appears, he whips me up, and takes me straight back to bed. He tucked me in. Like I can’t believe he actually rescued me”. As I was talking, I made sure not to reveal any trait of 18-Volt’s identity to my brother. The dream ended after I had finished telling my story. Dream 460 B - Prize Winning Artist I don’t remember how the dream started. From where I do remember, it was this completely unknown area. It felt like some stage and me and these other people were going through the lines of a script similar to the story of The Wizard of Oz. I was surprised in the dream that I was able to remember my lines really well and was playing my part of Dorothy to a high standard. Unfortunately though, one of the guys had cut me off saying that they wanted to stop there, so I was slightly cut because I was having so much fun. The next scene appeared to be in a school environment but once again, the surroundings were unknown. Apparently there was this sort of substance that when you painted it onto a watchband, it would make a really interesting pattern. I watched a few girls painting their watchbands and so was able to witness the effect of the paint medium. I then decided to try it myself but at first, I thought nothing was happening. “Oh come on...”, I thought as I then shook the watchband. After shaking the watchband though, something did happen and it was more than I expected. The colour started to bleed like expected but half way though, the watchband turned into this piece of paper and the art that was produced was absolutely and ridiculously phenomenal. It actually looked like the painting of some professional artist in real life. I then flipped the paper over and noticed that there was art on the other side too! My year six teacher came over and looked really amazed and what I had done. He said something to me but I forgot what it was. He then took my artwork to grade it but I didn’t like what he was doing. He was writing comments and the score all over it in pen and so I told him that it wouldn’t look good if I was to hang it up. The mark I got for the artwork was 60 out of 60. He then flipped the paper over to mark the other piece and he seemed to listen to me. He wrote in a very small corner only, marking it 40 out of 40. There was a small section of the next scene where I showed my mum but then dream went to another scene. I was now at this area at night time which seemed like an unknown railway station. I also had four friends with me that don’t exist in real life. Apparently we all wanted to catch a train but while we were waiting for the train, I wanted to find Dreamy WB to show her my award winning pieces of art. I called for Dreamy WB but there was no response and my friends, two girls and two boys, had looks on their faces like we weren’t going to get lucky any time soon. I decided that we would explore the area to go and find her. I went in one direction with two friends, one boy and one girl, and the other two friends went in the opposite direction. As I walked down the concrete stairs outside, I kept shouting to the dreamscape “Dreamy WB!” with my friends following and turning their heads to see if they could see her. No matter how many times I tried, there was still nothing. Soon the thought came to me though that the train was bound to leave soon and we were far away from the platform. So without giving any notice to my friends, I changed the direction of calling to 18-Volt. I seemed to wander a bit faster than my friends now and so soon ended up by myself. Yelling for 18-Volt didn’t seem as stressful as the tone was for Dreamy WB. All I ended up doing was looking up the stairs and said half way between speaking and yelling, “18-Volt, if you’re there, can you take us back to the main platform?”. As I continued to walk back up the stairs, the most amazing thing happened. I could see a shadow casting over my step, created by the pole lights and so I stopped. I slowly looked up and there was 18-Volt standing on the next step, looking right back down at me. He was once again in his Game and Wario cover art appearance and this time, he was even just wearing his singlet and shorts. I was actually so freaked out in this scene due to a number of factors. First of all, he actually looked like a real human, like I could actually see real flesh on him as well as his glasses being out of real blue plastic frames and then the lenses… Oh the lenses, accurately red and green of course… Everything about him was so, freaking real! Secondly, he was actually full-on staring at me and not saying anything, additionally having this constant stern look on his face that gave him the complexion of a criminal thug supported by his big, buff body. He was very scary to look at. For almost what seemed like a minute, he was staring at me very seriously and I was staring back at him nervously, I couldn’t see through his glasses to see what exactly his eyeballs were doing. I do know for a fact though that it seemed like he was staring right into my soul and from a very dominating position. This time, I could actually also smell the scent of African culture wafting off him and I could hear him slightly snorting each time he breathed outwards. For the first time in a dream, I actually started to perceive a negative energy coming off 18-Volt. As each second passed, my muscles became more tense, I became more guarded in my stance, and I was becoming a nervous wreck. He must have finally noticed the mess I was becoming as he all of a sudden, out of nowhere, broke out into a really wide and pleasant closed mouth smile. To my surprise, the weight just automatically lifted off my shoulders and every instance of negative energy I had gained before was now gone. That sense of familiar warmth and security had now returned. So now I prompted 18-Volt, reminding him to take me back to the platform. He made a physical gesture at me, which I believed he was telling me to wait for my friends. While waiting, I inched closer to 18-Volt on my step and started leaning on him, randomly examining each fine thread of cotton on his singlet and still thinking to myself “Geez, how on Earth is he real?”. Eventually, my four friends came walking up and so 18-Volt started things off by extending his left arm out. He scooped me up and I was placed right against his body. After that, he started picking up each of my friends; I was thinking to myself, “Your arm’s not big enough to fit all four of them in”. Apparently I was wrong and I was amazed; he put two behind me and then another two at the back, being pushed in by the crook of his arm. As he proceeded to carry us all up the stairs, the dream faded out and so I woke up. Dream 460 C - A Favour For A Favour I don’t remember how the dream started. From where I do remember, it was in some completely unknown area, appearing to be a mix of a shopping centre and somewhat of a house. I was in the house part of this complex with the lady, a complete stranger, planning to host some social movie event in which was apparently her place. I forgot what she said completely but she wanted me to go into the shopping centre part and recruit some guests, this one woman in particular. I made a mental note that I had to be back by 7:00 PM because that’s when the movie would start. As I’m leaving the house, I look at my brother and signal to him, asking if he had already brought the guests over, and he said no, so I was clear to go. I found the lady who was off in this weird little kitchen at the other side of the shopping centre area. I asked her about coming to the house but then she said she wanted me to do something for her. She wanted me to supposedly teach her how to cook something using dry ingredients only. I said that it wasn’t possible but she kept demanding that it be done. I told her to at least add water into the mix if she didn’t want to add anything else. My mind was telling me that it was nearly 7:00 PM and so I had to whisk the lady away from her cooking and get her out into the main part of the shopping centre. As I looked over towards the escalators, I could see random characters on it; I forgot what they looked like and when they reached the top, they would get trapped and then sucked in. I cried out to Dreamy WB, asking her to come and save them but nothing happened. It was getting really late and not much time was left and I immediately changed over to 18-Volt, calling out and asking him to take us up back to the house. In the meantime, while I was waiting for him, I opened up what seemed to be my techniques journal and also where I write everything under the sun. In this journal entry, it seemed that I was using a lot of cuss words for some reason and they weren’t necessarily too pleasant either, it did include the Lord’s name, I am not going to specify what the phrase was. The dream had also converted the pen ink into some permanent orange coloured typed font. Eventually, 18-Volt appeared and interestingly, he first of all seemed to have intentions to sort out my apparent cussing problem. He slowly crept up behind me and had a read at what I had written, he then put a finger on the start of the F word and rubbed it, in which he ended up smudging the F and turning it into another letter. Once I turned around and noticed him, he pulled me aside to speak to me. He had the appearance like in 460 A and B but was wearing a lavender business shirt and black business trousers. He whispered at me in a polite tone, I forgot what he said exactly but he was basically telling me to stop cussing. He then got this petrified look on his face like he was now scared that I was going to get mad at him. I reassured 18-Volt and said to him “No, that’s fine. Thanks for doing that” as I stuck my thumb up and nodded at him. As he then proceeded to stack me and then the lady into his arm, like in 460 B, I woke up. Dream 460: Results (Competition #8) 460 A Competition Night: 17 Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid Dream Guide: 18-Volt Emergency Team: None Eligible For Competition Points: Yes 460 B Competition Night: 17 Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid Dream Guide: 18-Volt Emergency Team: None Eligible For Competition Points: Yes 460 C Competition Night: 17 Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid Dream Guide: 18-Volt Emergency Team: None Eligible For Competition Points: Yes Points For This Entry: 9.5 Calculation Details: - Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0) - Have A Dream Guide Automatically Appear: 18-Volt (0.5) - Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0) - Summon A Dream Guide: 18-Volt (1.0) - Full Non-Lucid Dream (1.0) - Help Someone In Need (1.0) - Summon A Dream Guide: 18-Volt (1.0) - 3-Day Recall Chain (3.0) + Previous Total: 95.5 Total Accumulated Points: 105.0

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8297989 https://www.dreamviews.com/blogs/karlab18/dream-saving-sleepwalker-prize-winning-artist-favour-favour-85663/

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #215

i’m not dead yet, just not into surveys very much lately.

What is your favorite dinosaur? Spinosaurus. <3 Would you rather live with wolves or tigers? Hypothetically, if I wouldn't be harmed, wolves. I love social species. Have you ever forgotten what a certain kind of pain felt like? Getting my nose re-pierced like fuck man. What do you remember the most about your childhood? I think the strongest memory is my parents not getting along. Or the stories I made playing with my favorite toys. Would you rather have a pet dinosaur or have mythical creatures be real? Have mythical creatures exist. I want a tame, little dragon. Do you have a favorite toy from childhood still? Astonishingly, no. I was incredibly surprised to find out I got rid of them at some point when I wanted to add the crocodile to my room as a cute decoration and memory. What are your thoughts on the end of the world? *shrug* Not like we can do anything about it, unless you count our own carelessness as a selfish species, but that won't actually end the "world," just mankind. Which sports do you enjoy watching? Dance. Would you ever have a breed of dog that is considered aggressive? I don't want another dog, but hypothetically, yes, because no species is inherently mean. It all depends on how the owner raises it. Have you ever made bread? No. Would your childhood self be disappointed? FUCK YES SHE WOULD BE. God, the thought is depressing. Has anything ever fallen asleep on you? Animals and my niece. Would you like to live in a realm where the zombie apocalypse is possible? Is it too far into imagination to say it's possible in the one we're already in? You have zombie viruses in things like bugs, so in time, something developing that can affect humans isn't out of the question. But anyway, anyone who answers "yes" to this, as in they'd like it, are full of shit. Most of us would die in a heartbeat. You'd witness others that you love die. Every day you question if you'll see the next. The zombie apocalypse has been so romanticized in many forms of media, but please, tell me you'll still be having fun when you watch your mother be eaten or some shit. Have you ever gotten into an accident with you parents’ car? No. What’s the wallpaper on your computer? A meerkat pup looking close up to the camera. What was the most difficult decision you’ve ever had to make? Deciding Jason couldn't be my entire world anymore and I had to let go. Name a band/artist you like that isn’t that popular. There's a YouTube artist named Jonathan Young that I MARVEL over the fact he's not signed with someone. My mom didn't even believe he wasn't professional the first time I played some songs in the car. Can you lift your significant other (your best friend if you’re single)? I'm certain I could. What is the first vehicle you recall your parents/guardians owning? A greenish-blue van. What was the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done? I don't know. I'm not really that rebellious. Pick one: Laundry, Dishes, or Vacuuming? I actually don't mind vacuuming. Have you ever moved and had to change schools growing up? No. Name the most meaningful thing a non-relative has done for you. When my former best friend let me live with her while we were homeless. Memories like that sometimes make me question my decision to cut her off permanently... though I remind myself the bad outweighed the good and our relationship was just never going to be stable. The highway and back roads take you to the same place; Choose your route. Depends on what's quicker to save gas. Are you more likely to give up or persist when you’re having trouble? It depends on the situation. Tbh I think I give up more often. Do you resemble one parent more than the other? I don't think so. Your best friend needs a kidney to survive; Do you give them one of yours? That's my girlfriend. So duh. Name a big life event that has taken place for you within the last 2 years. I physically met Sara. Do you end up regretting things you say often? I don't know about often. Name one thing you look forward to as you get older. Hopefully being financially stable. Do you use your hands when you talk to emphasize what you are saying? Yeah. You own a huge business; what is it? I can't even imagine myself owning a "huge" business. Are you afraid to ask for help when you know that you need it? Sometimes. Depends on who I'm asking. Name somebody you think died before their time. A LOT OF PEOPLE. I think above all of my options, Steve Irwin. Fucking saint, teacher, and pilot of conservation and loving our fellow animals. Name the possession you’ve had the longest. I have a lot of infancy stuffed animals up in the attic. You’re writing a novel; Is it horror, mystery, romance, etc.? Fantasy. Would you consider yourself an interesting person in general? I guess. I know I'm at least different. Have you ever gotten in trouble for running up your phone bill? No. When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? I don't plan on changing the style any time soon. Hopefully at some point soon I can get to the damn hair salon and get it dyed lilac, though. But it'll be expensive for a pro to do it (I'm very much so done with anyone less trying to do so, as it always fails), so that's something I don't think will come soon. It's not high on my priorities. Who was the last person to see you cry? Is this person special? I'm sure it was my mom. Probably. Of course she is. What season would you like the world to experience year-round? Autumn. When was the last time you took a picture of something? Was it yourself? Lmao it was of something funny on Facebook that I texted to Sara a few days ago. Are you currently drifting away from anyone? Who is it? No. Would you say you are really close to the members of your family? Most, no. I barely see anyone outside my immediate fam. Is there anyone who lives in the same house as you, that you can’t stand? The stupid dog. Do you remember the first conversation you had with the person you have feelings for? No, but it was likely RP-related. Think of the last person you kissed, when was the first time you talked to them on the phone? She knows I hate talking over the phone, so we use Skype to talk. I think the first time I called her via phone though was when I was having an emotional breakdown. What does your phone do when you get a new message? It makes the sound from Spyro when you pick up gems if it's not on vibrate, and when the screen goes black, a green light blinks. Do you automatically check your phone when you wake up? Yes, for the time. Who was the last person you were in a car with? Mom. Do you party too much? I never did. Who were you last on the phone with? I answered a number I didn't recognize, and it wound up being some bullshit about my car warranty or something when I don't even have a car. I just hung up the moment I knew what it was. Last movie you watched? The Lion King live action remake. Incredible. If you had to get a piercing (not ears), what would you get? Fuck, I want collarbone dermals so badly. Do you like holding hands? With Sara. Have you ever seen the last person you texted naked? Yes. What are you listening to? "Third Day of a Seven Day Binge" by Manson is on rn. Do your parents allow you to date? I'm 23. They never really restricted me from it. Then again, I started dating in the 7th grade, so I was older than most first couples. Have you ever had a serious conversation with your dad? Yes. Would you rather have long or short hair? I could not be happier than I have short hair now. It's so much easier to manage, and it really did me well chopping it all off considering my bad self-care episodes. I recommend it soooo much to anyone struggling with that. Do you want to have children? Big No. Do you think you’ll have the same boyfriend/girlfriend a year from now? Realistically, yes. How old were you when you stopped sleeping with a nightlight? I don't know. What topic did you write your last essay about? This awful book "Masters of Doom" or whatever I had to read in game design in college, I think. Whose car did you ride in last other than yours? Dad's. What was the last clothing article you purchased? Some pants. Who was the last person that made you cry [accidentally or on purpose]? Probably myself. Is there construction going on in/near your neighborhood? No. Who did you go/plan on going with to prom? I went to Jason's senior prom and he came to mine. What language[s] did you study in school? Latin for one awful semester, then German for four. I miss German, honestly. Have you ever been to a debate and speech tournament? Hell no, that sounds so boring. Choose two dead celebs who could be your biological parents - explain why? Steve Irwin for my incredible love of animals and uh... I'm not sure about a mom? I thought about this for like two minutes and really don't know lmao. If you were living in the past, which job that doesn’t exist anymore would you like to have? No idea. Which animal are you afraid of? Most afraid of, probably some spiders, like huntsmen spiders. I'm afraid of most spiders in general (if they're near me or in my house, anyway), I cannot stand maggots and larvae of that sort, and whale sharks freak me out. AND WASPS. FUCK WASPS. How would your wedding bouquet look like? *shrugs* It would probably depend on the wedding theme. What kind of game would you like to play that doesn’t exist yet? I can't even swallow how unbelievable Shadow of the Colossus would be in VR. What is one thing you would never ever eat? Escargot. Is there a music video that you would like to see turned into a movie or a TV show? Which one? *shrugs* Which character in your favorite movie do you hate the most? It's impossible to hate any from TLK. How do you think the world will end? A meteor striking, or a deadly volcano going boom. Either way, it's gonna be smoke shrouding the sun. Do you own anything clown related? No. If you were a celebrity - which celebs you would befriend? Y'all done know one, but I think the celeb I would connect to most and most easily befriend would be Shane Dawson. He is such a goddamn sweetheart, chill as fuck, and #relatable. There's really a lot... All YT-related lmao. Except Bindi Irwin. Damn, would I love to meet her. If you were going to make a horror movie that you would be scared of yourself, what would it be about/how would it look like? I can't handle those movies about women being raped and impregnated by a demon and shit. I can't. Fuck The Rite. If you could take a pill that would cure something in you that isn’t an illness - what would you be cured off? How ungodly shy and awkward I am. Ew. Do you like Rihanna? I don't know most of her music, but I don't enjoy most pop, so. Have you ever experienced hydroplaning? Not severely, anyway, and not while I was driving. What’s your opinion on the legalization of weed? Legalize it medicinally. What’s your current favorite song? Man idk. Have you ever hit a girl? I hit my sister once as a kid. What was your New Year's resolution? I don't make them. Do you find Eminem attractive? Not particularly. Are you wearing nail polish? I never do. Have you ever been/considered being vegetarian? I was for a couple months and definitely plan on going back to it once I get to the weight I want... if that ever fucking happens. What’s the last concert you went to? Alice Cooper. Do you own a cat? Yes. :') He's my best buddy. Do you like cats? I love cats. Do you like watching music videos? No. How are your grades? I'm not back in school yet. But SOON. Do you listen to Aerosmith? YO "Love In An Elevator" just finished on my iTunes. I love them. Have you climbed a tree in the past month? I never have. Were you ugly in middle school? Jfc save that child. What’s your type? CHARISMATIC. Stand out, man, and be proud of it. Having a smart head isimportant, too. Having a loving heart. Have a good sense of humor. Don't judge. Do you sleep with one of those mask things on your face? No. Have you ever straightened your hair? Yes. What kind of calculator do you use? The one on my phone or laptop. Have you ever seriously tried to count the stars? Lol no. Did you see the lunar eclipse? I'm guessing you're talking about the biggie from early this year? Yes. It was incredible. Do you have a bank account? No. Did you go on vacation last summer? What's a "vacation?" Where to? N/A Have you ever been in a choir? At church as a kid as well as elementary school. Are you happy with your looks? No. Have you ever gone streaking? You couldn't have paid me to do so even when I was in great shape. Are any of your siblings married? Yes. Were you in the wedding party? Yes. Have you ever seen a ghost? I've sure as hell seen something. Do you even believe in ghosts? I absolutely do. Have you ever had an eating disorder? Thank God no. What big corporation(s) do you support, particularly because you like what they stand for (many vegan items, donate large amount of money to charities, pay their workers a living wage, etc)? I'm really not educated on the morals behind most businesses. Oh, I do know Jeffree Star's products are entirely vegan and cruelty-free though, so his company definitely is one. If you wear foundation or have in the past, what type of applicator do you use (beauty sponge, foundation brush, fingers, etc)? Is there a type of applicator that doesn’t work for you? I've always just used my hands because we don't have anything else for foundation, I think. For those of you that do listen/watch ASMR videos, what are your favorite “triggers”? If you don’t watch ASMR, what are your thoughts on the whole phenomenon that seemed to happen the past couple years over it? I don't listen to it, but I don't care if others do. It doesn't do anything for me. I personally find the talking ones super uncomfortable, but if someone likes that, whatever. Are there any true crime cases that bother you immensely because of the story or verdict of the court case (ex. OJ Simpson)? I know there're some I've seen on Facebook and such. Do you use store loyalty programs? If you don’t use them, what is your reasoning behind that? What store loyalty programs do you feel offer the best incentives, regardless if you aren’t a member of them? I think I am for Hot Topic? I know I have a card for there. I think Sam's Club is a great place to have membership; that place has some damn deals. Mom used to be one, as well as an employee, and that shit was great. When it comes to skincare, what product could you not go without over the other ones? Where are you most likely to shop for your skincare needs? I could go without any, save of course for a wet washcloth. If I get something for skincare, it's just gonna be at Wal-Mart. Regardless if you aren’t someone who hoards or keeps stuff for a long time, what is one (type of) item that you have a hard time getting rid of? STUFFED ANIMALS. FUCKING CHRIST. If you eat meat, what is at least one vegan item (not necessarily a banana) that you like or would like trying (such as trying a soy ham substitute)? If you don’t eat meat, what is one meat item that you like and understand why people eat it? I have no idea. Being vegan just sounds... gah. I couldn't imagine. Major respect for vegans, man. What is a food that is always better homemade? How about a food that is always better at a restaurant? I don't know about the homemade one. Maybe like... cobblers? Meanwhile, steaks tend to be better at restaurants, I've found. If you watched teen dramas growing up (such as 90210 or One Tree Hill), which one was your favorite or you liked the best? If you watched family sitcoms growing up (such as Full House or The Fresh Prince), which one was your favorite or liked the best? I'm not sure if I watched teen dramas. For family sitcoms, ummm... I loooooooooooved/still love The Nanny. I like the two mentioned as well. What is a tradition either within your country or family that you feel is not needed or could in fact even be bad (ex. using paper plates for every party, eating hot dogs every weekend during the summer, etc)? Getting drunk as a motherfucker on New Year's Eve. Is there something you said you wouldn’t do, but in the end you did it? Yeah, a few things. Are you originally an American, or are you some other kind of nationality? I'm just American, save for like, if ancestry is involved. Then I originate from Europe. Do you sometimes pretend to do things you don't know how to do? No? What was the last compliment you remember someone gave to you? Who was it? Hm, I don't know. Have you ever had one of those pregnancy scares? When did this take place? Two completely unrealistic ones in high school. Are you someone who puts ranch dressing on everything you eat? No. Have you ever personally been friends with a stripper or prostitute? Not to my knowledge. What, to you, is the best way a guy can smell? Give examples? I personally like gentle colognes. How many times a day, on average, do you think critically about something? Twice or so. Are you someone who speaks their mind, or do you hold it all in? It depends. Where do you work at this moment in time? Does this place have insurance? I don't currently work bc I can't be a functioning adult in a work environment without collapsing into panic attacks. :^) If you have tattoos, which one that you have was the most painful? The inside of my forearm. Are you currently in the process of ‘bettering’ yourself as a person? I'm trying to grow more independent. What is something you tend to not be able to stand in the least bit at all? Anti-LGBT bullshit. OH BOY, or anti-vax insanity. Do not even interact with me if you're a "vaccines cause autism" imbecile. Does it make you angry when people complain an excessive amount around you? If it's over stupid shit or an issue you brought about yourself, then yes. At what age did you actually hit puberty? Was it hard for you to handle? I don't remember, and yes, it was. I remember crying outside the day I got my first period because I realized I wasn't a kid anymore. Are you considered a graceful person or are you more clumsy? I'm the clumsiest fuck you'll meet in your entire life. Have you ever sucked in helium? Did your voice change at all? No. Do you know any girls who have an overly manly voice and features? Girls can't be "overly manly," just as men can't be "overly feminine." Do you play any sports? If so, did you meet new friends that way? I did, and yes. Do people ever make fun of you for something you really can't help? No. Do you have any pets who will bite anyone else out there, besides you? No. Have you ever tried chocolate chip waffles? Are they now your favorite? Yes; no. What company are you signed up for car insurance, if any at all? N/A Are you someone who really likes to cook? What’s your favorite meal? No. Are you the candle lighting type? I prefer incense. Is your ex sexually attractive to you still? If he looks anything like he did, yeah. But I haven't even seen a picture of him in forever. Coffee in the morning, yay or nay? Don't like coffee. Do you ever drink your coffee black? N/A Body waxing, yay or nay? Ow, I would never do it. Honeymoon, where? I'd love the pink beaches of the Bahamas... but fuck Bermuda's Triangle, my conspiracy theory ass ain't going near that shit lmao. The black beach in I think... Scotland or whatever will do. Anal sex, yay or nay? Never tried, never will. The concept just really grosses me out. Has anyone ever written on you? Probably. Have you ever dated a fat person? I'd prefer the term "overweight," but w/e, once or twice depending on if you count one relationship as "dating." How many foreign friends do you have? In which countries do they live? Quite a few, having been on the Internet so long... I've got some in Europe and one in Australia. How long have you known the oldest friend you have? "Old" as in who I've had the longest? Since I was ten, I think. If you include my "real" friends. What’s the most interesting story you’ve never told anybody? Good question. When’s the last time you went to a bookstore? What did you buy? Last year when we were threatened by a really bad hurricane. I got The Fault In Our Stars and only read like... ten pages lmao. It wasn't because the book was bad, I just don't read anymore. What’s the most complicated meal you’ve cooked? Hunty I can't cook. I've cooked scrambled eggs and spaghetti like once lmao. What is truly attractive to you? Wisdom, for one. Have you ever come up with your own game? As a kid, yeah. What is something you value a lot in your life? The fact I have my mom in my life hit me first. I. Don't know where the fuck I'd be in life right now if my mom wasn't here with me. Whose hand did you hold last? Sara's. What was the last thing you planted? Oh boy, I have no idea. Oh wait, years ago I grew habaneros only to find out non-pickled ones are fucking gross. What or who was the last thing you gossiped about? I have no clue. I don't really do that. Did anything exciting happen just before you went to sleep last night? Well, my cat literally peed on Mom. That was "exciting." When’s the last time you helped a senior citizen somehow? I don't know. What’s the most selfless act you have done? Man, a lot of "I don't know" in this one. You see a spider web in the corner of your room. What do you do? I'm finding that guy or moving. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? No. How do you like your favorite beverage? Cold. What’s your big family secret? We don't have one. Do you answer the phones at your work? I don't have a job. Have you ever given up on someone and then went back to them? Many, many times with my former best friend. Did you wake up in the middle of the night last night? I do every single night, and it sucks ass. What shows do you watch? None. Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I don't know. Has anyone ever told you that you have pretty eyes? Yeah. When’s the last time you had a headache? I think I had a mild one a few days ago? I don't remember. My days are sooo blurred together. Do you know anyone who has been arrested? Yes. Think back to the last person you kissed, how many times have you laughed with them? A whole lot. Have you ever suspected anyone of cheating of on you? Yeah, because of his ex and a believable lie. It was ultimately a good thing that that was what immediately turned me away though, as I don't want to imagine how a long-term relationship with him would've gone, honestly. Who was the last person you kissed? Sara. Do you still talk to the person who hurt you the most in life? No. Who’s the last person you sent a friend request to? I've no clue. I don't really send requests because I don't know more friends on there. Is anyone in your family a criminal? Not by blood. Who was the last person you told to shut up? I don't recall; I don't tell people to shut up, generally. I haven't had a confrontation in a long time, besides the occasional arguments with my mom, and I wouldn't tell her to shut up. What was the last thing you lied to your mother about? I don't remember. Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? No. Name a song that reminds you of a past relationship: I could name 50 that remind me of Jason and myself if I cared enough to. Do you think anyone hates you? One person probably does, at least. What do you think your last ex would say about you? I don't know, but probably something nice. He's my closest friend irl. Do you still talk to the first person you fell in love with? No. Do you still want the last person that hurt you to have a happy life? Yeah. Have you ever had a crush on any of your teachers? No. I, along with like every girl in class, found a former band teacher attractive, but I definitely didn't have an actual crush on the dude. Thank God considering he was eventually fired for relations with a student. Why did your last relationship end? I learned I didn't like him romantically, and also because I discovered I liked Sara instead. How long did it take you to get over your last heartbreak? A year and a half. And that's just when I started moving on. Do you know anyone that looks up to you? I doubt it. Which one of your friends is always serious? I don't think any qualify for that. Are there any people in your life that you wish you never met? Yeah. Do people think you’re a bad person? Probably someone. Do they also think that you’re a slut? I don't see how a single person could think that. Are you with the last person you kissed? Yes. Have you ever been punched? No. How many people do you know that have been to jail? Multiple. Three off the very top of my head. Do you know anyone that sells drugs? I don't think so? Do you know anyone that does drugs? Yes. Do you care about what’s happening in other countries? Well yeah. I care about the world being a good, safe place. Do you think you have a pretty good reputation? I guess, at least as far as being a decent person goes. Meanwhile, I'm sure my rep as being a proper adult and such is shit. Where do you see yourself in 25 years? I don't want to think of that. You’re at a bar, you witness a man drugging some girls drink. What do you do? I'm not even REMOTELY kidding, I'm knocking the fucker OUT, calling the cops, and of course telling the girl. Fuck that guy getting out of that without a black eye. Who is more attractive, someone who is edgy or preppy? I could never, ever be attracted to a preppy person, so guess. I wouldn't want an excessively edgy person either, but I'm NOT into the preppy jazz. Short term dating, or long relationship? I've always been about long-term relationships. Kids? How many? Why? Names? Boy or girl? *Bugs Bunny "no" meme* Ever play that game MASHO?? "I’ve played MASH. I don’t know if MASHO is similar or something different entirely." <<< Same. A sad child, skinny and underfed, approaches you. What do you do? Obviously ask them what's up if they approach me, and from there, it would depend on what they tell me. I'd most likely call the cops first about a child like that because I wouldn't know the appropriate place to actually call; if the kid is underfed to an obvious degree, odds are I shouldn't find their parents first. I'd think it wiser to get some kind of officer to do so and determine if that child should even be with those people for their own good. What happens after death? I hope some kind of peace, but who really knows. Would you cheat on your BF/GF if you knew they would never know? No??????? Because I would know?????????????? And I have a conscience???????????????????????? Do you think there will ever be peace on earth? Why or why not? No. People as a whole can't get along and too many find violence to be the ultimate solution to big problems. Favorite childhood story growing up? I remember I particularly liked Stellaluna because of the drawings, and I enjoyed the actual story of Chrysanthemum. Worst way to die? Why? Some form of slow torture, I'm sure. Because if you've gotta die, make it quick. And humane. What were you in school? Jock, nerd, prep etc… I was recognized as an emo/metalhead thing. Did you ever eat playdoh at a child? I don't think so. Your dreams tend to be? As of the late, violent, at least those that I remember... I wake up attacking the air a lot. Describe your aesthetic? A quiet pastel bunny and a furious but awkward gothic demon are aggressively fucking 24/7 while trying to decide who's top and who's bottom. Do you believe in the afterlife? I believe in something. What book have you re-read so many times that the cover is completely worn? None. Are you a morning person or a night person? I'm in a brighter mood in the morning. Who do you most admire? There're multiple people I look up to for different things. But as for most, yeah, probably Mark. What is your favorite thrift/antique shop find? I love this shipwreck lamp that I have. What is the most incredible place in nature you’ve visited? The mountains. What is your greatest achievement? Still being alive lmao. Is something expensive better than something made with love? Almost never. What do you think of stealing? Uh, don't do it??????? If you could be told when you were going to die, would you want to know? NO. What would you do in case of the zombie apocalypse? Die very early on lmao. Okay but realistically, I'd want to climb somewhere. I'm going to assume a zombie can't figure out ladders 'n shit. What have you learned from pain? You yourself play a big part in making things better. Are you more worried about doing things right or doing the right thing? Doing the right thing. What’s something you know you do differently than most people? Eat biscuits like a fucking caveman by separating parts and eating each individually lol. Would you ever adopt a child? If I actually wanted a kid, yeah. If you could make anything glow in the dark, what would it be? *shrugs* Could you ever picture someone writing a biography about you? Hell no, my life's uneventful as could be.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #97

gaming survey.

let's start with the classic: what's your favorite game?  why?   "silent hill 2."  it is so fucking well-thought out and went places no one ever thought a game would go.  it was psychological as fuck and absolutely terrifying in that sense.  it had such an intricate storyline and was positively heart-wrenching.  the characters were very unique, and oh boy, don't even think of forgetting the soundtrack.  it was so, so immersive.  the monsters were incredibly symbolic, and it really, really got you to question your own conscience.  i could literally go on about how wonderful this game is for hours on end. least favorite game?   probably "eleusis," whose name i don't care if i spelled wrong.  i know it's an indie game, but holy fuck, it's horrible.  the puzzles make legitimately no sense and literally requires a walkthrough. what's your favorite gaming genre?   psychological horror, easily. least favorite gaming genre?   probably first-person shooters. what's your favorite childhood game?   "spyro the dragon: year of the dragon."  i loved the entire series, but that was my favorite. when did you start gaming, anyway?   literally as soon as i could hold a controller and had the coordination to understand the buttons. scariest game ever?   "scp containment breach."  i couldn't play it because the first scp scared me so much lol.  however, i've watched my favorite youtuber play it many times.  despite it being in the indie scene, it's an incredible game and should really, really cost money.  hmmmm... actually, "parasite eve" may overthrow it.  not in terms of jumpscares, but in terms of, "what if that really happened?"  scientifically, maybe it's possible.  it explains why so very well.  it's the only game that ever resulted in me having to take an anxiety pill.  oh yeah, fun fact, we actually had a demo of the game on a demo disc, and mom hated the preview of it so much that she refused to let my sisters and i play it lol. favorite comedic game?   oh that's easy, "five nights at fuckboy's 3."  it is sooo fucking funny.  i love all of them, but the third's the funniest. favorite action game?   "resident evil 4."  it was one of my first action horror experiences. saddest game in the history of ever?   "silent hill 2," again.  i fucking cried so hard and my week was ruined lol.  that game legitimately changed me and made me ponder my decisions much more. favorite game based off a tv show or movie?   probably the first season of "the walking dead."  the characters were very unique (kenny is the Love of my Life), and the plot was phenomenal.  i wasn't much of a fan of the gameplay (or lack thereof), but i was there for the story.  the ending had me sobbing.  i've never actually watched the tv show, but man i love that game.  season three hasn't been that good imo, but i enjoyed the second one, too. game with the most interesting concept?   the entire "silent hill," obviously.  the idea that our biggest regrets and demons exist in multiple layers of reality is cool as fuck.  "soma" is a close second.  the philosophical debate of "if you move a human's conscience to a machine, is it still human?" is incredible. game with the most fucked-up storyline?   "silent hill 2" or "silent hill 3."  sh2 was more psychological in how screwed-up it was, but sh3 was very brazen abut it.  it also has the only scene ever in a video game that made me gag.  like i had to walk away from the controller because i literally almost puked. favorite gaming otp?   that's p hard.  actually, wait, i like tyrande and illidan from "world of warcraft" a lot.  their story was sad as fuck.  jaina and arthas from the same game, too. favorite video game protagonist?   i have two: heather mason from sh2 and leon kennedy from the "resident evil" series.  both are just total badases.  heather mason reminds me a lot of myself, and leon is just super fucking cool and gives zero shits. favorite video game antagonist?   does pyramid head from the sh series count?  i mean in ways he's not really an antagonist, so.  if he's not included, maybe claudia wolf from "silent hill 3" (LOOK I KNOW I'M TALKING ABOUT IT A LOT BUT THE SERIES IS MY BABY OKAY).  she is a prime example of how religion can absolutely destroy a person, and i think it's really cool that she truly thinks she's doing what's good for the world.  i also really like walter sullivan from "silent hill 4" because he is just sooo incredibly fucked up with a really tragic story.  arthas menethil from "world of warcraft: wrath of the lich king" is also amazing and i pitied him so much. favorite video game monster?   pyramid head, bar none.  he is so mysterious and terrifying in his concept. sequel that disappointed you most?   hmmm.  i'm not sure.  i mean, if i absolutely had to pick, maybe "silent hill: origins?"  i mean don't get me wrong, i enjoyed the game, but it's my least favorite in the series. most under-rated game?   "AMNESIA: A MACHINE FOR PIGS."  oh my GOD.  i do NOT understand why people thought it was disappointing to the title.  that is one of the most fucked-up, greatest games i've ever played (it's my second favorite game) i've ever had the pleasure of playing.  it is way, way better than the first game.  it's another game that had me depressed for days and questioning my life. most over-rated game?   probably "call of duty" and the like.  i just don't see the appeal. favorite quote from a game?   "i have stood knee-deep in mud and bone and filled my lungs with mustard gas. i have seen two brothers fall. i have lain with holy wars and copulated with the autumnal fallout. i have dug trenches for the refugees; i have murdered dissidents where the ground never thaws and starved the masses into faith. a child's shadow burnt into the brickwork. a house of skulls in the jungle. the innocent, the innocent, mandus, trod and bled and gassed and starved and beaten and murdered and enslaved. this is your coming century! they will eat them, mandus, they will make pigs of you all and they will bury their snouts into your ribs and they will eat your hearts!" - "amnesia: a machine for pigs."  i get literally covered in goosebumps every single time i hear it.  it's about how absolutely horrid the world is today from the perspective of the past.  i also really enjoy "the only me is me... are you sure the only you is you?" from "silent hill: p.t." game you want made into a movie?   "SHADOW OF THE COLOSSUS" OH MY GOD.  CAN YOU FUCKING IMAGINE. game you currently most want to play?   "the last guardian."  the story and trico are so fucking cute. what do you think of revamping classic games to "improve" them?   eh, i've never been too into it.  don't get me wrong, it works sometimes, but imo, it takes away the charm of the game sometimes.  ex., with "crash bandicoot" being remade.  i loved that game as a kid, but i think its graphics just added to the charm. favorite movie based off a game?   the first "silent hill." did you ever get those old demo discs as a kid?  did they ever influence you to buy a game?   yes.  i think we had three.  i was first exposed to "shadow of the colossus" by a demo disc.  i was totally into it and only played it a thousand times before buying it. were you ever or are you into the "final fantasy" craze?   not really.  i used to play "final fantasy viii" on a demo disc; my sisters, brother, and i loved it.  my bro was the only one who could beat the final boss (the spider thing) of the demo; he and ashley used to play it a lot.  i really liked it, and when i was young, wanted to buy it.  we all used to think squall was sexy as fuck lol.  the summons were super-duper cool too, especially rinoa's (i used to make her do her water dragon limit break constantly ha ha).  i did, however, have "final fantasty vii," and i got all the way to the second disc, but i eventually just fell out of playing it.  i think it was too long for me personally, although i really did enjoy the story. i'm sure you've heard of the "five nights at freddy's" one, too.  were you into it?   i've never played it myself and i personally wouldn't, but i've watched youtubers play it and i enjoy it.  the story and characters are cool (especially springtrap), and the story is quite frightening. hardest game you've ever beaten?   i am not even remotely kidding, "the legend of spyro: the eternal night."  it took me over a fucking year to beat that game and i rage-quit a lot. hardest boss monster?   jesus fucking christ.  there are three that top the list.  the ultimate being from "parasite eve" is probably number one, though.  he was hard as FUCK and took me like a whole goddamn day to beat.  his multiple phases were annoying, and the fact he could trap you at the VERY END if you picked the wrong door was a cardinal fucking sin.  basaran from "shadow of the colossus" was also horrific.  even malus wasn't that bad.  getting onto his back was a goddamn nightmare, especially when he got back up and if you misjudged your jump, you'd go flying.  ripto of "spyro the dragon: ripto's rage!" was also a childhood nightmare.  his phases were also annoying and he was just overall difficult.  i felt like a fucking god when i finally did beat him lol.  memory of alessa of sh3 was also hard for me, although she herself isn't that much of a difficult boss.  it was just that i had no ammo so had to melee her the whole time.  i got so fucking angry. how did you feel about "silent hill: p.t." being cancelled?  it was probably one of the most anticipated games of 2014.   want my honest opinion?  i'm glad it was cancelled.  that series is my fucking child and i would be legitimately furious if they fucked it up.  i had many issues with it.  one, the fact that norman reedus was made a model of the main character.  it just pissed me off that they designed him to look pretty much exactly like daryl dixon.  i don't want people to think "oh hey a guy from twd went to silent hill."  i also had a problem with them changing the name to "silent hills;" i really don't know why since it's such a minor thing, but it irked me regardless.  it also really, really bugged me that kojima openly said he's a bit of a wuss with horror games.  dude, you can't be like that when you're working with what is well-known to be one of the scariest series of all time.  i had full faith that del toro would be great for the series, but not kojima.  it also pissed me off that it was said that aliens might be involved in the game.  just... no.  that's not what silent hill is.  i get that it's a joke in the series, but to make it canon?  if they actually went through with that and made it so extraterrestrials were involved, i literally would've broken something.  ultimately, i'm glad it didn't work. favorite running joke or something of the like in a series?   the "i'm totally gonna stick my hand in this filthy toilet for a wallet" joke that the "silent hill" series has, rooting from when james sunderland did so in sh2.  i love the references. favorite side-kick?   uhhh.  cynder from "the legend of spyro: dawn of the dragon."  she not only looks super fucking cool, but she has an interesting story and is just overall really rad. saddest video game death?   well that's hard.  prepare for spoilers.  the one that hit me the hardest personally was probably vol'jin from wow.  he was my favorite character out of like the billion wow has, so him dying sucked.  not to even mention his death was super anti-climactic to where it pissed off the whole damn fanbase, despite being one of the most important characters.  lee from twd was also absolutely horrible.  ha, what a coincidence... they have the same voice actor.  #stopkillingdavidfennoy favorite plot twist?   spoiler warning once again.  my favorite and to me the most shocking was the fact james was responsible for mary's death in "silent hill 2."  it rocked my fucking world. best soundtrack?   "shadow of the colossus."  ko otani is a musical genius.  sh2 is a very close second. what's the first gaming console you ever had?   the original playstation. favorite setting in a game?   that's super hard considering so many games are absolutely gorgeous.  but i suppose lakeside amusement park from "silent hill 3."  i love the blood & rust, macabre feel to it.