#it just personally irritates me to see long-ass meta posts on my dash trying to 'prove' things that don't need to be proven.

[waterberry-strawmelon]

i’m so sorry but if you watch stranger things and you actually actually for real genuinely think that the duffer brothers have been secretly dropping hints that Mike is bi and actually always loved Will... get help.

[orionsangel86]

12x10 - “Pterodactyl Screeching into the void” - Part 1

My title is borrowed from @postmodernmulticoloredcloak comment on my crazy blogging after first watching this episode earlier. I feel like it is a fitting title for how this episode made me feel. To clarify, these are very very happy pterodactyls.

Steve Yokey wrote this episode and he appears to have well and truly taken up the gap left when Robbie Thompson sadly left the show. In fact this episode to me channels the ghost of Robbie in many different ways. From the fanfiction-esque moments of poor suffering third wheel Sam, to the meta nod to Charlie Bradbury, there is much of Robbie to be found here. Basically, it was bloody perfect.

I feel like there is so much to talk about in this episode that fandom will be chewing on it for months if not years to come. Yokey has picked up the characterisations brilliantly, and seems to have an understanding of what the fandom desperately craves in terms of Castiel, his character, his personality and his development. I adored his sass in this episode. Some other writers *cough*bucklemming*cough* struggle to really capture Castiel’s sass and humour. Showing their lack of understanding of Castiel’s persona and his intelligence and instead writing him in a way that is jarring and sometimes basically stupid. Castiel is far from stupid. In this episode he was written perfectly, in a way I haven’t seen since Edlund’s time. Is that a sweeping statement? Maybe. But I’m still riding my high so let me have it this time.

This episode gave us three of my favourite things. Badass and Sassy Castiel, Overprotective grumpy husband Dean, and poor long suffering brother Sam. (baring in mind this is how they are usually written in fanfiction nowadays this is exactly my jam and I am so so happy to see it play out on screen. Seriously who sold their soul to Crowley for this episode?)

This review will also be in two parts. Because I have so freaking much to say about it.

The first part will focus on destiel, the second on everything else including Castiel’s emotional arc (as separate from destiel), his relationships with angels, angels and gender and Lily Sunder’s character.

PART 1 - ALL THE DESTIEL

I’m still struggling to contain my excitement over this. The episode begins with Dean feeling very pissy about what happened at the end of the last episode. Castiel killed Billy to save the Winchesters regardless of the “cosmic consequences”. Castiel stands his ground that he doesn’t regret his decision. Dean is acting like a sulking child over the whole thing. Sam is cool with it. Because Sam is cool. He is also extremely fed up with being caught in the middle of a lovers spat.

And that’s just it isn’t it? How else can you possibly read it? This is a lovers spat. I have read this in fan fiction enough times to know exactly how this story goes. Funnily enough, the episode also goes the exact way of fanfiction (except for the explicit bits of course) and that makes me love it even more..

We start with Dean grumbling about Cas’s inability to track down Kelly Kline. It’s left to Sam to bring up Cas and whether or not they have spoken yet:

(gif source courtesy of @subcas)

We are 5 minutes into the episode, Sam is already so done, and I am having flashbacks to a fanfic I read recently… In fact I am pretty sure it was this one. 

No seriously read this extract pulled from this fanfic:

“Sam is witness to a lot of arguing, followed by one or both of them storming off in a huff. Long periods of excruciating silence stretch out between each altercation.  Sam never makes any move to intervene or get them to patch things up – Dean’s trying to figure out how to feel about that – but he always watches with careful concern and a raised eyebrow. Dean makes absolutely no effort to engage his brother on the topic, so he can only guess at what Sam makes of all this.

He tries to imagine what it must look like from Sam’s point of view – Dean getting irritated over nothing, sniping at Cas, fleeing without apologizing. Maybe Sam just thinks it’s all those perfectly reasonable aggravations, Cas being all up in his space and not backing off, Cas forgetting to refill the ice cube tray for the fifth time.

Then again, it’s Sam. It’s not like Dean doesn’t like Cas, or would get on his case so much even if he did, after all Cas has done for his sorry ass – even Dean’s not that much of a jerk. Sam must know that. He must know there’s something else going on. He probably understands exactly what Dean’s doing, maybe even better than Dean does himself.”

I mean COME ON. (also that is a awesome fic if you haven’t read it already… it gets pretty steamy further in the series. Cas is such a dom. Lmao.)

If we consider this entire conversation between Sam and Dean we immediately see a massive difference between their reactions to the Billy situation. Sam sees things objectively. He sees what Cas did, he knows that there could be bad consequences, but he understands that Cas did it for them, because he cared. He also respects Cas’s choice here and sticks up for him. Because Sam is not being unreasonable about his friends decision. Sam acts like a supportive friend. He gets it, it is his brother he is more fed up with.

Dean on the other hand is acting totally unreasonable. I haven’t even gotten to the conversation in the car when things start to get interesting because so far Dean is just being a jerk. Sam’s expressions tell us this straight away, before Cas even enters the scene. Why on earth would Dean act this way over a friend? He wouldn’t. It makes no sense. Just like in the fanfic I have quoted above. Something else is going on here, Dean is acting out for a completely other reason than what is apparent on first glance.

Once Cas does show up and things only get more awkward we get a brilliant moment which you can see giffed in its entirety here by @constiellation in which Sam is his poor awkward self stuck in the middle of a lovers spat that has been going on for the past week apparently. The way this moment calls back to 8x22 is completely thanks to the director Thomas J Wright knowing exactly what he is trying to show us in both episodes that poor Sam has been stuck in the middle of this domestic for years. (I should say a big thanks to @godshipsit for sending me the links to these posts since up until this point I have not been on my dash at all and therefore haven’t been gif hunting myself.)

The car scene drives home Sam’s terrible situation even further as he can’t even escape the immense *sexual* tension by moving to a different room.

LOOK AT THIS POOR BASTARD!!

Whilst I am sure that the intense tension and poor Sammy’s discomfort has been a major focal point here, the bit that I found most interesting was this exchange about Benjamin:

“Benjamin wouldn’t call for help lightly, he wouldn’t put himself in harm’s way if he could help it.”

“Wow this Benjamin seems like he is pretty cool, like he wouldn’t make any half-cocked knee jerked choices.”

What sets Dean off here is that Castiel’s description of Benjamin talks about Benjamin not putting himself in danger. That is why Dean thinks Benjamin is a cool guy. This is what Dean is digging at. This is our first clue into Dean’s real feelings about the Billy situation. He is pissed that Cas has potentially put himself in danger.

Cas’s response only pisses Dean off more:

“Yeah you know what I like about him, he’s sarcastic but he’s thoughtful and appreciative too.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Enough that Dean almost crashes the Impala. This is practically unheard of. Cas and Dean are not on the same page at the moment. Cas thinks Dean is just being a jerk and unappreciative of his efforts, and Dean thinks that Cas is being too careless with his own life (which you can damn well talk Dean, making death deals last episode)

Then this scene gets even juicer as we get this story about Benjamin and his vessel. This is our first of three Angel/Human love stories in this episode (not including the forth and most important love story between Dean and Castiel of course).

Everything about the way Castiel describes Benjamin’s relationship with his vessel implies a romantic connection (“gave him everything, her trust, her body… its more than that, she’s not just his vessel she’s his…” “friend”.) It of course, is never explicitly said (and that is important) but I bet that the general audience picked up on THAT bit of subtext just from the way Sam said the word “friend” and isn’t that so interesting? How often has the word “friend” been used throughout the series to describe Dean and Castiel? Yet here it is being used specifically in a subtextual way to describe something completely non platonic.

Moving on to our next bit of destiel deliciousness is another moment of brotherly teasing.

The boys arrive at the diner to meet Ishim and Mirabel. Castiel’s sass is on point today with his “If I plan to do anything else stupid, I’ll let you know.”

Can I please take a moment to appreciate Sam’s face here: 

(Gif source thanks to @godshipsit - you are a blessing Alex)

On top of that expression of absolute GOLD is this moment:

“and you’re gonna storm in riiiiiighht…. Now.” And omg Sam totally has no more fucks to give with his brothers bullshit. He can see right through Dean’s drama to how he truly feels. Dean may act pissy with Cas but the moment Cas may be in danger Dean is all like “oh HELL NO.” Five minutes. He lasted five minutes. I love overprotective embarrassing husband Dean it is MY JAM.

 “These are my friends, my friends who don’t listen well”

*cue Dean practically sitting in Cas’s lap*

This is the best moment in the history of the show. Three grown ass huge men squeezing into a tiny diner seat. I LOVE IT. 

Ishim is such a tool, the way he speaks to Cas is awful but what is so so great is how Dean and also Sam stick up for him here. We so often seem to get Sam and Dean digging on Cas, talking him down and treating him like shit. The Winchesters are world weary and grumpy men and Cas often gets caught up in this. What we are shown here is just how defensive they get when other people try to do it. Because where the Winchester’s digging comes from a place of love, these angels nasty comments come from a place of hate. The Winchester’s won’t have it. 

Also SO MANY jokes to be had over the subtext of “no one talks to my husband like that BUT ME bitch” Oh DEAN.

Moving on to this beautiful flashback moment and our even more beautiful fem!castiel who wow what a good casting. But more on that in part 2. What I wanna talk about here is this moment:

(gif source once again thanks to @godshipsit)

We have our second angel/human love story of the episode between Lily and Akabel, or at least what we are led to believe is an angel/human love story that resulted in the birth of a Nephilim. The truth being that Akabel has pledged himself to protect Lily from Ishim at all costs. By the end of the episode, we are actually given the impression that their love was platonic rather than romantic or sexual. Akabel’s confusion when Castiel reads out the accusations is evident of that, as is Lily’s reaction to Dean and Sam’s attempts at reasoning with her later on.

However going back to the above gifset, Akabel argues to Ishim and the angel group that “How could anyone know [humans] and not love them?” at which point the camera cuts to Castiel. This my friends, is a nifty piece of editing which Supernatural has used on many occasions to add to the growing mountain of destiel subtext. Why cut to Castiel at this point? Because Castiel is going to experience this himself later in his lifetime. (by knowing and subsequently falling in love with Dean Winchester of course).

The third angel/human love story is next and it is a worst case scenario, dark and twisted tragedy and a massive subversion of the Dean/Cas story. It explores how an angel fell ‘in love’ with a human, but that human didn’t return his affections and therefore the angel became cold and murderous and obsessed. Ishim is a horribly twisted and dark Cas mirror highlighting what Castiel’s actual weakness is. Because Castiel nowadays cares more for the Winchesters than the world itself. “cosmic consequences” mean nothing when the Winchesters (and more specifically Dean) are in danger. The difference between Castiel and Ishim is that Ishim takes his anger out directly on the woman he loves, whereas Cas would never harm Dean. He instead makes decisions which have put the world in danger. 

I mentioned this previously, but the dark foreshadowing here is rather horrible. We have a terrified Lily left powerless whilst Ishim makes her watch as he kills her child. Claiming that she “broke his heart” so he will “break hers”. This is extreme. Where Lily is our Dean mirror and Ishim is Cas, who is Lily’s daughter? Sam. We have already seen this situation play out with our boys previously. Castiel, hurt and betrayed that Dean wouldn’t stand by his side to open purgatory and stop Raphael, breaks Sam’s wall and leaves him comatose. Its not the first time that Sam has been the one to get hurt in a fight between Dean and Cas. In an episode where he has constantly been trying to play peacemaker between them, could it be that Sam gets caught in a much bigger situation that started between Dean and Castiel? That perhaps the “cosmic consequences” Billy spoke of somehow end up hurting Sam? How could such a situation harm Dean and Cas’s relationship? Leaving Cas cold and hating human’s and Dean on a revenge mission to rival Gerard Butler’s in Law Abiding Citizen? Hopefully not. But with the emphasis at the start of this episode on the lovers spat and Cas not thinking before he acts, rather acting on his emotional need to keep Dean safe, and Dean’s anger possibly also being about Cas’s supposed obsession with him putting Dean first before the world… well, its not looking good for our boys basically. But then again I did say this was worst case scenario. 

The next moment that made my heart leap thanks to the destiel of it all:

(gif source thanks to @some-people-call-it-tragic )

This was preceded by a phone call that Dean made to Cas that only rang twice before his over protective nature kicked in and he ran back to the ‘safe house’ to go save his husband from Ishim. Leaving Sam to talk to Lily (its always Dean who goes back for Cas. Remember that.) After all the bitterness from the start of the episode, it is clear by this point that none of that matters if either of them are in danger.

“Who are you gonna believe? Your brother? Or some filthy ape?”  Ishim tries to make Cas choose him over Dean. Which is of course hilarious to anyone that has watched even just one Cas episode of the show.

“Always talking down at you, always mocking you”.

Whats great about this is how this is being said in front of Dean because Dean is getting called out here. Ishim has been nasty and rude to Cas all episode, IN FRONT OF DEAN. Through Ishim, Dean is able to see just what a jerk he has actually been. Its giving Dean the chance to think about his actions, because there is no way Dean will want to be put in the same boat as this asshole.

“Ya know Cas and I might not agree all the time, but at least he knows who his real friends are”

Look at these two badass hunting husbands forming a united front against the bad guy. Also “Friends” just like the “friends” of Benjamin and his vessel right?

Of course everything goes super bad after this and poor Cas gets beaten to shit by this absolute dick of an angel IN FRONT OF DEAN. All this crap that Ishim is coming out with is being said IN FRONT OF DEAN. Do you know why I love this so much? Because we have had crappy villains like Ishim saying this kind of shit to Cas since SEASON 9 and sometimes even earlier. Castiel has always just taken it, never said “no. You are wrong about me” and in the later seasons he has started to believe their words, adding to his depression and PTSD. He has been called weak and pathetic and expendable and a tool and every time he has been alone. We have never had Dean be there by his side to hear these words to argue against them. But that is EXACTLY what we get this episode. And it is ABOUT BLOODY TIME.

And then we get probably the most obvious moment for Destiel from the whole episode. To the point that if the general audience don’t see it now they are a bloody lost cause:

(gif source @godshipsit AGAIN because I am Alex’s biggest fan)

SERIOUSLY THOUGH. Let;s do a nice simple logic puzzle with what we know is canon:

Metatron says Castiel’s “true weakness is revealed”

Metatron says that that his weakness is “He is in love… with humanity”.

Metatron says “You draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but it was all about saving one man”

Ishim draped himself in the flag of heaven, but it was actually all about getting revenge on one woman.

Ishim said that he was “in love” with that woman.

Ishim called that woman his “human weakness”.

Ishim says that Cas also has a “human weakness”

Ishim threatens to cut out Castiel’s “human weakness”

Ishim goes to stab Dean.

Therefore can we please, finally accept that it is CANON that Dean=humanity. That Castiel is IN LOVE WITH humanity and that therefore

Castiel is in love with Dean Winchester.

Now that we have accepted that this is canon. Lets move on to the very next scene. This:

(gif source thanks to @codestielckles)

Now its Dean’s turn to get a choice. Blast away both angels, and Castiel will potentially die, or die himself. Of course Dean won’t do it. Dean would rather die fighting for Cas than risk Cas’s life. Ishim of course knows this to be true. “yeah, that’s what I thought” he says.

Also such an interesting shot of Cas looking at Dean in that moment because HOW MUCH does it remind you of that horrible moment from 10x22? What’s the betting that was also done intentionally? 10x22 was also directed by Thomas J Wright. This guy knows his stuff.

Thankfully Lily and Sam come in to save Dean from Ishim who really was just on a mission to kill Dean at this point probably because of his massive jealousy that Cas gets a human lover and he doesn’t.

Finally, probably the end scene we have been waiting for the past YEAR. The Winchesters actually TALKING to Cas and telling him what he NEEDS TO HEAR! I am all over this scene man I’m telling you I have been waiting for this I have been hoping and praying to Chuck for this! Dammit I am so happy about this!

“You’re not weak Cas you know that right?”

“Obviously you’ve changed, but its all been for the better.”

“And you’ve been with us every step of this long crazy thrill ride… and no matter how crazy it got, you never backed down”

“That takes real strength”

THANK YOU SAM AND DEAN AND THANK YOU STEVE YOKEY

*sips Cas hater tears*

And THEN we get this beauty which sums up Dean’s attitude all episode. It kinda actually sums up Dean’s attitude throughout the whole fucking show:

(Gif source thanks to @godshipsit again)

“I’m not mad, I’m worried.”

Exactly. Like how right at the beginning he picked on Cas after Cas mentioned Benjamin wouldn’t put himself in danger. Dean is worried about Cas. Dean is worried about his idiotic husband who cares more about saving him than he does himself and the world. Cas is blinded by his love for Dean. It is a problem and Dean ain’t happy about it. But it is all rooted in love.

And that’s it and I am exhausted!

I haven’t written so much meta on Destiel for one episode like EVER in my time in fandom. I doubt we have had an episode with THIS MUCH destiel in it since Goodbye Stranger. I can’t actually contain myself. Anyway, in summary. Destiel is canon. Destiel Exists. (Poor Jensen he must be so confused that season 12 skipped straight from episode 9 to episode 11) We have textual confirmation now (via a little bit of well applied but completely solid logic) that Castiel is in love with Dean and that Dean is an overprotective emotional mess when it comes to Cas being in danger (not that we didn’t know that already thanks to 11x18 among every other Cas-in-danger episode so far) This is undeniable.

Like I said in this episodes title. I am still pterodactyl screeching into the void about it. I don’t think I’ll stop going on about it for a long time yet.

I have more to say about this episode that is not specifically related to destiel coming up in part 2. Watch this space!

[backwardabyss]

i’ve been free of the sh*rlock fandom for many blissful years now and i try not to like, write things on this useless blog of mine but i’ve seen more reactionary anger to the season four finale than i was expecting so i feel compelled to Share My Thoughts regardless of whether or not anyone wants to hear them. full disclosure: i am not a fan of j*hnlock or the conspiracy movement it has inspired so you may not want to read this if you are. 

i guess the major thing for me is.........confusion. shipping holmes/watson i wholeheartedly understand, of course, there’s a long and beautiful history of doing it and i’ve always adored the ambiguous queerness of the Canon’s holmes and how that’s been adapted or not adapted in the thousands of films/tv shows/pastiches/etc that have followed it. what i dont?? fucking understand??? is the people who genuinely thought it would become canon, on bbc sh*rlock (2010) OF ALL FUCKING THINGS????

i’m pretty damn far from being a “casual” viewer of the show, it was my primary fandom for several years and i was once-upon-a-midnight-fuckin-dreary completely consumed by my love for it. so as someone for whom that is true but who, unlike most fandom people for whom it is true, has not been sucked into the J*hnlock Meta Echo Chamber, i feel pretty confident in my assertion that there has been really very little in the series itself to suggest a romantic john/sh*rlock endgame. sure, their relationship is at the center of the show and they ofc have been shown to care for each other deeply and enduringly, as holmeses and watsons always do....and, sure, there are without question lines and moments that could be read as revealing a romantic undercurrent to their devotion to each other (particularly on sh*rlock’s end, i think). but that there was a legitimate conspiracy movement convinced beyond all shadow of a doubt that they were going to explicitly get bbc’s sh*rlock and john making out onscreen...i just do not get it, and do not see it, and yes i’ve read the metas, and no they did not convince me and i’m not entirely sure how they convinced anyone but whatever, it’s fine, that’s not the point.

like, for example, i keep seeing people shocked that after the ~EXPLICIT TEXTUAL GAYNESS~ of the lying detective they couldn’t believe the final problem would follow. and i’m just like??? huh? you mean, the hug? the one that happened in the context of a) john mourning his dead wife who he clearly loved very genuinely and b) john hearing sh*rlock receive a text from irene adler and urging him, quite explicitly, to go fuck her and telling him he’d be an idiot not to?? that explicit textual gayness?? WHAT? (i know the Conspiracy People have composed all these half-assed metas about how irene isn’t Really A Character and is just a mirror for sh*rlock or a symbol of his desire to bone john or something, but, lol no offense but fuck that misogynistic bullshit that treats every woman on the show as a literal empty signifier only sitting there to reflect something about sh*rlock and/or john. it’s just not a good reading or a valid interpretation and it’s so sexist i don’t even know where to start lmao. john genuinely wants sh*rlock to find the love of A Good Woman bc he is a hetero and well, the worst, and there was nothing about that scene that felt like a lead-up to the two men in it falling in love like ohhh my god. oh my god.)

and like ok, i got off course there, but how did ANYONE expect a different outcome after this interview, in which gatiss and moffat both told you all in NO UNCERTAIN TERMS that they had no romance planned and in fact seemed incredibly miffed by the refusal to be believed when they said that?? gatiss literally says that there is no conspiracy and that even tho they lie about some things in interviews they are not lying about this. and look, i don’t want to defend them, i think the writers of this show are assholes and bigoted in ways they can’t see, but how anyone could accuse them of “baiting them into thinking j*hnlock would be endgame” when they’ve been saying it won’t be the case (often in unnecessarily rude and offensive terms) for literal YEARS??? i don’t get it. I REALLY DON’T. and no, gatiss doesn’t Owe you a holmes/watson relationship just because he’s a gay man himself lmao and when he’s expressed his feelings on the matter countless, countless times. you all chose not to believe him, for whatever reason, so i mean i’m sorry if some of you are hurting but i’m also feeling very congratulationsyouplayedyourself.jpeg about the whole thing.

which brings me to my last major point really, which is: WHY WOULD YOU WANT THESE HORRIBLE PEOPLE TO BE THE ONES TO DELIVER YOU YOUR QUEER REPRESENTATION?? moffat in particular is just, UGH, i mean, for fuck’s sake, the man wrote an adaptation of a scandal in bohemia where irene identified herself as a lesbian and yet, in the very same episode, fell in love with sh*rlock to such an all-consuming degree that she Lost Her Head and made a silly mistake in their game and got humiliated in defeat. like, what kind of lesbophobic, misogynistic fucking NONSENSE that btw completely deviates from the plot of the actual story in which she beats holmes’ ass and flees away into the night, victorious and safe. that’s the writer you thought was orchestrating a queer endgame for his beloved sh*rlock holmes???? that’s the writer you wanted orchestrating a queer endgame for his beloved sh*rlock holmes?? l o l....ok. that’s not even taking into account all the nasty things he’s said in interviews, like how sh*rlock is ofc not interested in men and ofc he’s not asexual bc asexual people are BORING, sh*rlock is just a latent straight man repressing his urge to bone women!! maybe he’ll marry mrs. hudson in the end tho!! lmao. i....cannot.

and i guess i’m also irritated by this guilting wave on my dash, like i’m obligated to feel sympathy for all these shippers who get duped, or whatever. like, look, even putting my personal feelings about the j*hnlock fandom aside (YOUR SMUG ASSES MADE THE FANDOM LIVES OF ALL RAREPAIR SHIPPERS HELL FOR YEARS, YOU ASSHOLES), after going through what, say, the 100 did to lexa, i’m just.....having a hard time feeling sympathy, i am sorry. oh, your two favorite characters get to live happily together raising a baby in 221b in a scenario that leaves them ripe and open for no end of headcanon and fic that can be totally canon-compliant? boooooo frickin hoooo. HEARTBREAKING. 

i realize this probably is like, rude and condescending and invalidating or whatever and well what can i tell u, i’m a rude bitch, but i am tiiiired of reading all these posts like this is the biggest slight against the lgbtqa+ community in media history. it’s not. yeah, you should all be expecting better from your media, for sure. but you should not have been expecting better from this shitpile of a show, which has proven its disregard for women, racial/ethnic minorities, and queer ppl for seasons upon seasons now. it’s 2017, and the tv landscape still isn’t great but there are so many shows out there with actual canonical lgbtqa+ characters that you can be looking to for the representation you want, deserve, etc. 

sh*rlock isn’t the queer love story you all wanted it to be, and if i’m not empathetic abt that it’s bc i’m SO DAMN RELIEVED that’s the case, bc it and most of the people involved in its production are hmm, what’s the word.....THE. DAMN. WORST.