#it just makes me feel so insane how wyll is so sweet and adorable and charming and I’ve seen countless fandoms go crazy for men like this

[dorindameddler]

Sorry I know I make this post like once a week but it’s just soooo hard to enjoy bg3 fandom when the racism is such a huge elephant in the room

[shadowstarion]

okay but what if astarion shadowheart karlach gale wyll poly. i never get laezel or minthara so idk enough about them to analyze so imma just focus on my Main Camp Team. this gets very nsfw toward the end because i’m ill and i want them all to fuck!

the insane potential for an incredible number of love triangles. it starts with astarion and shadowheart, because he assumes the amnesiac will be the most naive/easy to influence. they pick up gale and astarion finds him annoying while shadowheart finds him sweet and useful to the mission. of course astarion starts trying to compete with and outsmart gale, which just creates an insane amount of sexual tension.

then karlach joins in and shadowheart is immediately smitten with her, leaving gale and astarion to let that sexual tension come to a climax or two. shadowheart, literally conditioned to be non-monogamous is all for it and pouts about not being invited until gale realizes that Oh. Oh. This is a thing that was happening…? well, he can’t blame astarion for liking her, and she’s much sweeter and substantially less threatening than the Girl He Has Feelings For that gale brings to the table.

karlach is a hard one because she is actually insanely monogamous and would be happiest only with shadowheart, trying to ignore the fact that her girl had other partners because she’d never deny her happiness like that. then i think once astarion and gale opened up a bit about their experiences and conditions karlach would really start developing a connection with them that would eventually bleed over into something a little more. she’s used to warming shadowheart up at night, what difference does one more shivering elf at her side make? gale is her fucking bomb bro till the end and he’s super smart and explains stuff to her she doesn’t understand without making her feel stupid.

then we add wyll to the mix. the literal actual genuine knight in shining armor of astarion and shadowheart’s dreams, so kind and honorable and hot they’re down bad. the way wyll suffers under mizora but doesn’t regret his pact with her wins over gale’s sympathy immediately and of course, wyll’s sacrifice to protect karlach gets her right in the infernal engine too.

as for specific small group dynamics ive already gone crazy about shadowheart astarion and karlach so we’ll skip over them for now.

gale -> astarion <- wyll is simultaneously “i want that twink obliterated” and “oh my god you poor injured little stray cat let me nurse you back to health”. very big on the unpacking trauma and having Man Therapy Time that leads to astarion and gale both crying into wyll’s very muscular shoulders

wyll -> shadowheart <- karlach is the knight x princess trapped in a tower x dragon dynamic but the princess and dragon are in love and the knight is an awkward blushing mess who is super into this. i know karlach and shadowheart have some freaky sex so anything with with them would be be BDSM Bootcamp for wyll

shadowheart -> gale <- karlach is fuck your ugly ex you didn’t deserve that, that is NOT love, let us show you how it’s done. they’d also recognize and encourage that little spark of femininity that pops up in gale from time to time and definitely indulge him in it. he’s also an extremely perceptive chatterbox, so honestly i think he’d be the third member of the gossip girl trio over astarion who isn’t quite so analytical

astarion -> shadowheart <- gale is soooo much jealousy competition for shadowheart’s attention but gale is completely oblivious to it. shadowheart adores the concept of being bickered over and feeds into it just a little bit to see astarion squirm. i am a shadowheart fujoshi truther and watching astarion and gale go at it is definitely her cup of tea.

wyll -> astarion <- shadowheart is purely “if anything happens to me, i know you’ll be here to take care of him”. now, put shadowheart in the middle and it’s herding dog x lamb x wolf dynamic all the way. very much the angel and devil on shadowheart’s shoulder when it comes to everything

a really fun one is wyll and karlach + shadowheart and astarion. this i feel would be mostly sexual because what says masc/butch best bros solidarity like topping your respective pretty twink/femme partners together? especially with shadowstar sandwiched between them and kissing like their lives depend on it.

also, there is absolutely some gangbangery happening but they’re very specific about it. if shadowheart is in the middle it’s insanely rough and degrading and pushing her to and sometimes past all her limits with her prior consent of course. she’s definitely into eroticizing her memory loss and getting fucked completely brainless, letting go of all her worries, having everything replaced with love and pleasure and pain that feels sooo so good…

very rarely astarion is in the middle but it’s the complete opposite. they’re all there to love on him, to make him feel good, to make him feel safe and secure. very slow and gentle and at his pace, taking turns touching him and getting him off and completely overstimulating him. someone’s got him held in their arms the entire time, usually karlach or wyll, shadowheart running concentration on his thoughts in case something goes too far and he can’t communicate it. praising him, telling him how good he is, how much he deserves all this love and adoration, etc, helping him completely rewrite the thousands of degrading and harmful sexual encounters he’s had little by little

idk what the opposite of a gangbang is but karlach is just an absolute stamina monster and will sometimes do a bit of circulating because she just can’t fall asleep or she’s too wound up or shadowheart knocked out immediately and she’s sexually frustrated. no one can resist her puppy dog eyes and so she ends up riding wyll into the ground, swapping head with astarion, and having some freaky wizard sex with gale that keeps her going until she’s too exhausted to move

im like chemically addicted to group poly at this point and i will forever be sad you can’t really even do a throuple in-game. however, a girl can dream!