#it is extremely funny that 1000 years pass and hes never like. maybe its time to retire the jester look.

[orphanedsource]

its thistle the new friend thistle. everyone likes him

[tanadrin]

Reordberend

(part 21 of ?; first; previous; next)

(BTW, as of this update, Reordberend is, by my count, a little over 45k words long, putting it in the territory of a shortish novel. That also makes it one of the longest SF stories I’ve ever written. It’s not the most popular thing I’ve ever posted on Tumblr, but it has gotten a steady trickle of notes. Knowing there are people out there who enjoy your work, even if it’s fairly niche, is the best motivation there is to keep writing. Thank you for reading!)

Katherine Alice Green The Guest Room in the Village Hall The High Settlement McMurdo Dry Valleys ANTARCTICA

to Dr. Eunice Valerie Gordon Trinity College Dublin Dublin 2 IRELAND

Dear Dr. Gordon,

I am writing yet another letter I won’t be able to send, which, I realize might make me seem like kind of a crazy person. The only defense I can plead, I guess, is that the perpetual darkness of the winters here does funny things to you if you’re not used to it, and I’ve had a lot of down time lately that I need to do something productive with. I have already written to my parents, to a couple of friends, and to my cat, which leaves only you. And these letters seem to have a way of focusing my thoughts, so maybe it’s not an entirely useless exercise.

Where to begin? Well, first of all, I’m alive. That may come as a surprise. It occured to me not long after I was marooned here that perhaps nobody knows that. No one has come looking for me, and why would they? If any rescue parties did go looking for the Albatross, I doubt they’d come this far south. Not in winter. But I did in fact survive the ship going down. I don’t think anybody else did. The Dry Valleys People didn’t find anyone else on the shore, alive or dead. I try not to think about that too much, but, to be honest, it still has me kind of fucked up.

Oh, that’s the other things. I’ve made contact with the Dry Valleys People. I am, as the return address indicates, currently living with them. They have welcomed me, rather reluctantly, and I’ll be able to remain at least until the first sunrise of spring. This was not necessarily a widely popular decision, and I’ve come to learn that the political situation among the DVP is rather complicated. They have always guarded their isolation and their independence, and they’re keen to keep guarding it in the future, but there are some among them who worry how long that will really be possible. I think this is something Dr. Wright foresaw, and tried to warn them about in the letter he sent with me. But as you might expect, this is something a large part of their community doesn’t want to hear or even think about, and my presence here is definitely fraught.

As for my original mission… well, it’s an unqualified success, despite the difficulties. I’ve learned a lot. The language, to start with. You won’t believe this, but they speak Old English here. No, not thee and thou and maketh yon Old English. Not Chaucer, even. Older. From their books and what they’ve told me, their ancestors used the West Saxon dialect of Old English, as spoken about the year 1000 AD, as the basis for the language they taught their children. Dr. Wright knew this, of course. That’s how he was able to communicate them and win their trust; he showed an affinity for the same history and the same long-term perspective they cared about. If it seems weird that a bunch of people would move to Antarctica, forsake almost every modern convenience, and deliberately teach their kids a dead language that would be useless in the wider world, well, all I can say I guess is that humans have done a lot of weird shit for a lot of weird reasons throughout history. I think I am beginning to understand why the ancestors of the DVP did what they did. Some of them have tried to explain it to me, but there is a gap in our worldviews here that is difficult to bridge.

One of the DVP that I have befriended is a poet named Leofric. His sister, Leofe, taught me the language, but I’ve learned a lot more about their literature from him. It’s primarily an oral literature, although they do write some of it down. They like long, semi-narrative poetry that draws heavily on the imagery of the natural world, and I would say that it owes something to the ancient Anglo-Saxon poetry they keep in their books, except that, of course, the environment here is nothing like the environment of England one thousand years ago. But there are still some poetic traditions they have inherited from those earlier examples. For instance, their world is harsh, and unforgiving, and from a certain angle looks like a world in decline. The ancient English (so I am told) were surrounded by great Roman ruins they spoke of as being the work of metaphorical giants; here, they have the ruins of two hundred years of scientific and industrial exploration of the Antarctic coast. And their world, too, is enclosed by a vast cold sea, although this one has penguins in it at least.

Aside from the language, the founders of the DVP don’t seem to have intended to recreate medieval English society. There are no kings. There is a semi-formal system of village headship by seniority, but the social hierarchy is very flat. Marriage, inheritance, and choice of occupation all take place on fairly egalitarian terms, and their strictest taboos surround the sharing of labor and resources, not sexuality or religion. I wonder how much of their customs are the result of gradual cultural evolution, or some deliberate effort at creating a planned community. There are lots of funny Utopian experimental communities out there, but most tend to fail after a generation. In a way, this one couldn’t fail, because they had no way to leave Antarctica. They had to make it work. Is this what a real utopian project looks like after six or seven generations?

But honestly, one of the most fascinating aspects of the DVP is their material culture. As you might expect, their day-to-day existence is profoundly shaped by the environment they live in. Their houses are all heavy stone, designed to trap scarce heat, and arranged around the village halls as a windbreak against the dry katabatic gales that sweep the McMurdo Valleys clear of ice. Despite this being one of the driest locations on Earth, it’s still a better habitat for them than the glaciers of the Antarctic lowlands, or the rough, icy terrain of the mountains--here, you can actually build, and you don’t need skis and snowshoes to get around. But, as a consequence, much of their most important infrastructure is underground.

I don’t know if the ancestral DVP brought the right tools with them or if they scavenged them once here, but they have accumulated a small stockpile of laser borers, ultrasonic chisels, and crystalsteel digging equipment that they use to carve out underground chambers in the hills as meeting places and ritual sites. But they don’t do their agriculture there; that happens in networks of buried trenches just below the villages, where they grow cold-resistant mosses and lichens to supplement a meat-based diet, and what seems to be a form of genegineered fibergrass they use to weave their clothing and tapestries, and to make books.

Their art is very beautiful. Their coats, books, and tapestries--even their stone carvings--all depict elaborate lineate forms of plants and animals, inherited I suppose from ancestral memory, since none of the organisms in question are found in Antarctica. They also make images depicting the mountains, of course, and the sea, and the animals that live on the coast; even some of the coastal settlements, as seen from far off. They’re often abstracted, but these images are geographically grounded: they’re not just “generic mountains” or “generic coastline,” they’re specific mountains, specific coastlines, and they add up--if you are exposed to them every day of your life growing up--to something like a conceptual map of all of Victoria Land. It seems that if you dropped an average adult DVP individual anywhere from Oates Land to the Queen Elizabeth Range, they could probably find their way home, even during the dark months of winter.

(Oh! And the dark months! You’d think they’d be depressing, but I never imagined in my life I would see such a sight as the aurora australis, or even the clear polar stars! I can’t describe it to you. Maybe Leofric could, if I could do justice to his verse.)

They’re very communitarian, and great emphasis is placed on making sure no one goes without, but the price of that is, apparently, extremely elaborate dispute-resolution mechanisms; for a culture without courts, government, or attorneys, they are remarkably bureaucratic. Each physical object seems to have its own laws attached to it. Some may be shared by all objects of that type--for instance, if you need an electric firestarter, you always go to the house windward of yours to ask if they have one. If they don’t, you go to the next, and so on; firestarters pass from house to house, as needed, but only in one direction. Other objects may have completely unique rules. There is a knife with an elaborately carved handle meant to be used only by left-handed people. I don’t know why; nobody I asked knew, either. But that was the custom, and it was scrupulously obeyed. As a rule, the more elaborately decorated an object, the more particular the rules associated with it, but the elaboration of the object doesn’t seem to connote anything about the rules. It only marks it out as somehow special. The rules themselves are transmitted orally. All of these rules at bottom are about making sure that resources are evenly distributed--making sure nobody has to walk too far in bitterly cold weather to find a firestarter, for instance--and even the ones that don’t make sense now probably were created for good reason. For instance, the southpaw knife. Their knives for carving meat all have handles that curve in one way, to help separate flesh from bone, and I suspect that one is the result of a left-handed steelsmith getting fed up with with tools he couldn’t use very well. The blade is that of a carving-knife, though the handle attached to it is straight. The handle was probably later replaced when it broke, and somebody needed the knife for a different purpose--but the custom attached to it remained the same.

This system of sharing is, if anything, even more scrupulously observed when there’s a windfall. We went on a salvage expedition a month ago and brought back some much-needed supplies, and they spent days working out what would go where, first to each village and then, once we got back to the High Settlement, each house in each village--and even then, this was just what went to who first. Anything that’s not a finite supply, like food, will get passed from house to house. Leofric tells me that a few years ago, a whale--an entire blue whale, actually--beached itself to the north, and they had to have a weeklong assembly (on the beach, next to the whale, natch) to decide what do with every scrap of meat and bone. They still talk about the arguments that went down at the Whale Parliament sometimes (for which their word is hwaelthing, by the way. Literally it means exactly what it looks like: “whale-thing.”). Funny thing is, they also very carefully manage arguments in these discussions. That’s not normally the case--if two people have an argument and what to physically fight each other about it, that’s considered their business. But when it comes to disputes about food or metal or tools, everybody is very keen to show how Not Mad they are, even if they’re actually seething about it on the inside. And if voices get raised, people get hustled aside, and the whole matter is dropped completely until everybody has a chance to calm down. This looks like a system that was either deliberately designed to keep fights from breaking out and feelings getting permanently hurt, or one that sprung up after some nasty experiences of actual fights. I suspect the latter. It’s all very informal, but there’s a lot of social pressure that enforces it. The price for division and discord in an environment this hard to live in would be death, and I think all their social institutions are built around that reality.

I will admit, this has not been the easiest experience. I mean, there’s the almost dying part, and the part where all my cybernetics are broken, and I had a bad bout of something flulike a few weeks ago and almost died again, but I don’t actually mean the physical hardship. It is a more isolating experience than I thought it would be, being the lone outsider in such a close-knit community. Everyone knows everybody and everything, except me. They all have their own jokes and stories and long-running feuds, and they can communicate a great deal to one another with just a glance, and I’m left wondering what just happened when everybody laughs at something, or a fight breaks out. I have struggled sometimes to learn the language. I mean, I’ve had no other choice, and it’s amazing what you can learn when your survival depends on it, but even now I still sometimes find myself struggling to communicate ideas, or staying silent even when there is something I might want to say, just because I can’t find the words. It’s infuriating not being able to express yourself well, and maybe for good reason I sometimes think they all see me as this hapless idiot who almost got herself killed, who they have to put up with until the spring as a result.

Okay, I mean, I kind of am that. But I am also genuinely interested in their society, in the DVP as individuals, in their stories and their history. But I feel like the best I can hope for is being kind of a mascot. Or a well-meaning but dim-witted pet. A Labrador or something.

Not that I haven’t made friends. I would say Leofric is a friend. The salvagers--Eadwig and Andrac--they’re friends. And I seem to have won at least the grudging toleration of the ones like Aelfric who initially wanted to leave me to die. But sometimes I think I’ve made a connection, somehow bridged the unbridgeable gulf between my life experience and the world of the DVP, only to find out I’ve done no such thing. I thought Leofe was a friend; but now she’s not speaking to me, and she’s left the High Settlement for one of the other valleys. I don’t know why, and the others just shrug when I ask them.

Ugh. This is turning into whining. Now I know I’ll never send it. Sorry. It’s been a long day. It’s amazing how tired you can get when your muscles can’t rely on your augs to help them do shit.

But I need to find a way to bridge that gap. I mean really bridge it. Because I feel like I’m starting to understand something the DVP aren’t ready to hear. Their ancestors came to Antarctica at a time when the rest of the world wasn’t much interested in it. It was a wasteland, so sure, let’s treat it as an international, shared territory. Nobody goes there but scientists and the occasional tourist. And during the Collapse, not even that--Antarctica was truly empty for the first time in a hundred and fifty years when the ancestors of the DVP came to its shores. But it isn’t anymore. And it won’t ever be a real wasteland again. Every year the mining consortia move a little further down the Transantarctic Mountains. Every year a new outpost pops up on the coast, more ships come to Port Alexander, more icebreakers cut through the polar sea. Antarctica is warmer now that it’s been at any time in the past. Heck, without some global warming, I don’t think the Dry Valleys would be habitable. But that means more exposed rock, more open ground to build on, more people coming to the continent to work on the mining platforms or the offshore factories, and one day, I think, they’re going to come here.

What will the DVP do when that happens? This isn’t North Sentinel Island, which nobody ever goes to because there’s no reason. There’s gold in the hills here--the DVP make jewelry out of it--and maybe other precious metals, and you could build a geothermal station on Mount Erebus and power a small town, if you wanted to build some autofactories. The Antarctic Authority exists to promote “science and industry,” but with a big emphasis on industry. And by science they mostly mean, like, watching penguins bone and building telescopes at the South Pole. Not soft stuff like anthropology. And certainly not protecting three valleys full of cessionist oddballs whose parents had an unreasonable fondness for dead languages.

I think Dr. Wright knew this. I think maybe he tried to warn the DVP when he was here, but back then the danger was even further away. And it’s hard to get people to pay attention to danger that seems far away, even if it might be an existential threat. And when dealing with that danger would require you to completely change the only life you’d ever known… well, that’s a hard sell. The DVP don’t really like change. I can’t blame them. But one day things are going to change here, and if they’re not prepared for it, it could get really ugly, really fast. It’s one thing to shut yourself away when the world is ignoring you. It’s another when the world comes knocking.

If I think I can persuade them, I’m going to talk to the elders here, Aelfric and Wulf. Some of the DVP have had very fleeting contact with outsiders before me. I think one of them should come with me in the spring, as a sort of emissary. I’m not sure who they should talk to, yet. Maybe the Authority. Maybe somebody in Port Alexander’s local government? Or maybe we should just try to tell their story directly to the world. That might bring the DVP more attention than they’d like, but better a little good attention now than a lot of bad attention later. I would have asked Leofe--she’s smart, she’s tough, she could handle the culture shock--but that’s not an option now. Something to think about, anyway.

Well. I hope this letter finds the imaginary version of you well, my love to the imaginary family &c, hope the undergrads aren’t giving you too much trouble this year. If for some reason you do find this letter--like I freeze to death on my way to the weather station in September and they find this document on my corpse--please forgive my stubbornness, my insistence on going on this stupid trip, and any worry I’ve caused you as a result. And if I really am dead, please tell everybody I died doing something badass, like, I dunno, fighting a polar bear. I guess those are extinct and they never lived in Antarctica anyway, but something along those lines. Make it good.

All the best,

Kate

[the-desolated-quill]

Doctor Strange - Marvel Cinematic Universe blog (as requested by 1000+ followers)

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this movie yet, you may want to before reading this review)

Before I start, I just want to say thank you again to all one thousand of my followers (still can’t believe it. That number just doesn’t seem real. LOL). And, as promised, here’s my review of Doctor Strange. I chose to review this movie to mark getting one thousand followers because people have been wanting me to do this review for a long time now (nearly three years in fact) and also because it was this movie, or rather my harsh criticism of this movie, that arguably cemented my reputation on this site. So here we go. Hope you feel it was worth the wait. Enjoy :)

2016. A year of ups and downs to be sure. While it will forever be infamous for the Brexit referendum result, Trump’s victory in the presidential elections and many much beloved celebrity icons dropping dead like fruit flies, it was also the year where two of my all time favourite comic book characters would finally make the jump to the big screen. The first was Deadpool. The second was Doctor Strange. Two characters I thought would never get movie adaptations on account of them both being somewhat niche products. Deadpool was a violent, anarchic parody of antiheroes like Wolverine and the Punisher, while Doctor Strange was a psychedelic fantasy story focused on existentialism and Zen philosophy as well as having its themes and influences deep rooted in various Asian cultures and mythologies. Not exactly mainstream. And yet, against all the odds, both movies found great success at the box office. The difference being Deadpool managed to stay true to the tone and themes of the source material, whereas Doctor Strange... oh dear.

Now my long term followers will be very much aware of my stance on this movie. At the time I refused to watch it due to the casting of Tilda Swinton as the Ancient One, viewing it as not only racist erasure, but also demonstrating a severe lack of understanding on the filmmaker’s part. East Asia isn’t just used as window dressing. It’s vitally important to the story as a whole, so discarding it would be incredibly moronic as well as deeply offensive. Now I’m not going to go into all the reasons why the whitewashing of the Ancient One is racist and why all the excuses Marvel gave at the time was bullshit as I’ve already explained these reasons ad nauseum various times before. If you’re curious, read Doctor Yellowface And The Bullshit Machine, where I explain it all in excruciating detail. Here I’m just going to say that this movie is racist. That’s not my opinion. It’s demonstrably, objectively, scientifically, factually and literally true. If you think otherwise, you’re an idiot. Period. Full stop. End of discussion. Do not pass Go. Do not collect £200. With this in mind, when I sat down to watch this for the first time, I expected to be angered and outraged by it throughout. But I wasn’t. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a bad movie and a bad adaptation of Doctor Strange, but honestly the most remarkable thing about this movie is how unremarkable it is. Which is a problem in more ways than one, but now we’re getting ahead of ourselves.

Lets start with the things I liked. Don’t worry. This won’t take long. There really isn’t that much to like about this film frankly. Even the bits I like have massive caveats to them.

My first shiny gold star has to go to Benedict Wong as Wong. Now as much as I love the comics, I’ll be the first to admit it has massive problems when it comes to how it presents Asian characters. So I’m pleased to report that Wong is the only aspect of the film that’s actually better than the source material. Whereas comic book Wong was Doctor Strange’s manservant, movie Wong plays more of a mentor role in Strange’s story. He’s the librarian of Kamar-Taj, guarding the sacred tomes, and is actually at a higher rank than Strange, which I love. It’s a good shift that refreshes the dynamic between them, and Benedict Wong’s deadpan delivery is exceptional. I just wish we could have spent more time with Wong and Strange. Maybe see Wong actually teach him something.

The second praiseworthy element of the film is the visual effects. This film was nominated for an Academy Award and... yeah, can’t argue with that. The CGI is fairly good for the most part. My favourite part of the whole film was when the Ancient One shows Strange the multiverse for the first time. The visual effects team clearly had a lot of fun coming up with weird and wonderful worlds that we only get a short tantalising glimpse of. (the dimension of hands gave me the shivers). This sequence came the closest to realising Steve Ditko’s vision in my opinion. Beyond that all we see for the rest of the movie is the poxy mirror dimension, which admittedly is cool at first, but quickly becomes dull and repetitive each time its trotted out. There’s even an entire fight sequence between Strange, Mordo and Kaecilius in a distorted version of New York, which would have been impressive if Christopher Nolan hadn’t done it first in Inception. And the less said about the technicolor monstrosity that was the Dark Dimension, the better.

Finally there’s Benedict Cumberbatch as Strange himself. I know some people were disappointed that Marvel didn’t racebend the character and I would have preferred that to, but if we must have a white guy in the role, I’m glad it’s Cumberbatch. He does a decent job in the role and there are moments where Strange almost leaps from the page and onto the screen.

Almost.

Because that’s the problem. Cumberbatch does the best he can, but he’s ultimately let down by the script. This film has a lot of issues, but by far the biggest is the title character. He may be called Doctor Strange, but he’s really Doctor Strange in name only. I was a massive fan of the comics growing up and I’m telling you this guy isn’t Doctor Strange. At least not the Doctor Strange I remember. And the weird thing is this seems almost by design. In order to show him to a mainstream audience, Marvel seem to have felt the need to completely sanitise the character, removing everything about him that made him unique and interesting in order to fit the expectations of the lowest common denominator.

Let me explain.

People often compare Strange unfavourably to Iron Man, and I can understand why to a certain extent. Both represent the epitome of white privilege and materialist obsession and their origin stories focus very heavily on criticising and deconstructing these inherently selfish and unlikable characters. Iron Man is about forcing a capitalist industrialist to take responsibility for the consequences of his actions, whereas Doctor Strange is about forcing an egocentric man to care about the wider world outside of his own bubble of privilege. Both may sound similar, but there’s a key difference between the two. Iron Man’s origin revolves around responsibility whereas Doctor Strange’s origin revolves around relativity. This needs to be understood if you’re going to attempt to adapt Strange and director Scott Derrickson doesn’t seem to understand that at all.

The fatal mistake Derrickson makes with this movie is that he’s trying to make Strange like Iron Man without fully understanding what made the first Iron Man movie good and what sets Strange apart. He’s clearly hit upon the arrogant, egocentric thing, but the problem is people exhibit arrogance and egocentricity in different ways. The comics understood this. Iron Man’s arrogance takes the form of this charismatic, devil may care kind of attitude, whereas Strange’s arrogance was more along the lines of an Ebenezer Scrooge type figure. Someone who’s cold and uncaring. Someone like...

Yeah! Someone like Dr Gregory House from the TV series House M.D.

See, if Iron Man is like Elon Musk, Doctor Strange is like House. Both are arrogant, but in different ways. So to see movie Strange acting all smug and making quips and one liners just didn’t feel right. Which is not to say Strange can’t be funny. The comics had their humorous moments, but it’s not the same kind of humour as Iron Man. Strange should be more cutting. More snarky. He needs to have more of a bite to him. Instead we get the poor man’s version of Robert Downey Jr.

But wait, because it’s actually worse than that. It’s not just Strange’s personality that’s different. Our perception of him is different too. The first Iron Man movie was extremely clear in how we should view Tony Stark. The gambling, the drinking, his lack of responsibility and the way he takes his friends and co-workers for granted. We’re clearly not supposed to like him. That’s why his character arc works. We’re seeing this selfish individual realise how selfish he is and try to make amends. Strange should be similar. He’s a callous arsehole who won’t lift a finger to help someone if the case isn’t interesting enough, seeing it as beneath him. So when the car accident occurs, him getting nerve damage in his hands feels less like a tragedy and more like karma. The universe punishing Strange for his selfish behaviour and forcing him to change. In the movie however, he doesn’t seem like that at all. In fact kind of the opposite. He doesn’t object to helping his ex girlfriend get a bullet out of a patient’s head and he seems to get on well with most of his colleagues, including his ex. Sure he’s a bit of a dick, but he still seems nice enough. The only time we see his Scroogeness come out is after the accident, at which point it’s hard to hate him even after he berates his ex because he’s a decent guy who’s understandably frustrated, which absolutely should not be the case. Strange is a bastard who cares for no one but himself. We’re not supposed to like him. But Marvel and Disney are so preoccupied about getting bums on seats that they’ve actually managed to strip away all the elements that make Strange Strange.

And then there’s the origin story itself, which the film gets completely wrong. Sure the basic elements are still there. Strange, in a last ditch effort to save his hands, travels East to see the Ancient One (except the Ancient One is now in Nepal instead of Tibet because of the Chinese market, but apparently they still can’t cast an Asian person as the Ancient One even though the film no longer has anything to do with Tibet and therefore there should be no issue. Marvel are racist dicks. Case closed), but beyond that everything is changed. In the comics, the Ancient One refuses to heal Strange’s hands because he’s a selfish arsehole who deserves no pity or help from anyone, but then when Baron Mordo tries to assassinate the Ancient One, Strange does the first selfless thing he’s ever done in his miserable life and tries to warn the Ancient One despite having his mouth magically sealed shut by Mordo. Then it’s later revealed that his mouth wasn’t sealed shut at all, and that the Ancient One knew all along Mordo was planning to assassinate him and was merely testing Strange, at which point he invites the good doctor to practice magic in order to stop Mordo in the future. In the movie however, Strange gets kicked out by the Ancient One only to then promptly get let back in after banging on their front door for several hours and gets taught all these spells despite showing no sign of selflessness or willingness to change whatsoever. Oh yeah, and Strange and Mordo are now total besties.

Do you see what I mean about this being a bad adaptation? There’s no longer any conflict. No character arcs. No one learns anything. Everything is just hunky dory and Strange is just magically a good person now. This is truly shit writing.

Everything about this movie seems to have been designed to be as bland and uncomplicated as possible. All the Asian influences and philosophies have been surgically removed to make way for a generic, knock-off Hogwarts for Dummies. The interesting plots and themes have been replaced with a by-the-numbers save the world plot. Even the lore has been simplified to an almost insulting degree. Take the Eye of Agamotto for instance. A powerful magical artefact created by and named after the most powerful sorcerer that ever lived.... reduced to a fucking Infinity Stone.

Oh and the Cloak of Levitation now has a mind and personality of its own because why the fuck not? Who wants to watch something intelligent or philosophical? Lets just make a shitty cross between Harry Potter and Mr. Bean.

And then... there’s the white saviour stuff.

Now I confess I haven’t read the comics for quite some time, so correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure Strange didn’t have a photographic memory. Yet in the movie, that’s the convenient explanation we’re given for why Strange is somehow able to learn complex spells in a matter of days. Spells that are apparently meant to take years to learn, like astral projection and time manipulation. Now the comics had this problem too, what with proclaiming that Strange is not only the Sorcerer Supreme, but the most powerful Sorcerer Supreme that’s ever lived, as though his white skin were like the star power-up from Super Mario Bros, but the movie seems to go out of its way to double down on this bollocks. Oh sure, we see him struggle to create magic portals every now and then, but it doesn’t hide the fact that he’s somehow able to create mirror worlds and time loops despite having little to no training whatsoever. He’s like Rey from Star Wars. He can just pull any random super power out of his arse when the script requires him too.

So having completely botched Strange’s characterisation and journey, how are the rest of the supporting cast? Well like I said, I like this new Wong, even though he’s criminally underused. As for the other characters, it’s a pretty forgettable bunch.

Lets start with the elephant in the room. Tilda Swinton. Having heard all the excuses under the sun as to why Marvel and Disney simply had to cast a bald white woman wearing a bathrobe in an Asian role, I was expecting something pretty spectacular from Swinton, especially after all the praise critics gave her. Instead we get... well... a pretty dull character actually. In fact I’d go as far to say that this is the blandest and most uninspired performance I think I’ve ever seen Swinton give. There’s just nothing there. Now admittedly the Ancient One wasn’t all that complex or well developed in the comics neither, being little more than a racial caricature, but I thought the whole reason they whitewashed the character was to make him/her ‘enigmatic and ethereal.’ Instead we just get the same generic mentor figure we’ve seen dozens of times before. All the stuff about her tapping into the powers of Dormammu to increase her lifespan could have made her more interesting, but the film never fully capitalises on this revelation before she kicks the bucket.

Baron Mordo is pretty much just dead weight, with the great Chiwetel Ejiofor utterly wasted in the role. He’s essentially reduced to being yet another black sidekick for the white lead. Again, the comic book version isn’t all that great neither, but the movie replaces this camp pantomime villain with absolutely bugger all. We don’t get to see any real conflict between him and Strange until the very end and even then it doesn’t really make sense. Mordo is a stickler for rules and so gets pissy with Strange when he breaks the rules in order to save the world, to which I can only ask... what else could he have done? I didn’t see you come up with any bright ideas Mordo, you fucking moron.

Rachel McAdams... exists.

Seriously, why is she in this movie? Why does Doctor Strange need a love interest? Why not just wait and introduce Clea? I could get behind using an ex girlfriend to display how selfish and narcissistic Strange is (a bit cliche I admit, but this is an MCU film we’re talking about. I’m not exactly expecting Citizen Kane here), but as I said before, the two seem to get on quite well. And other than stitching up a stab wound, Christine Palmer pretty much does nothing throughout the majority of the film. So what is she even doing there?

Also it appears the film’s racism doesn’t just extend to Asian people because it turns out Christine Palmer is actually Night Nurse in the comics. The same mantle Claire Temple has, who appears in Marvel’s Netflix shows. Not only does this come off as quite alarmingly racist, it’s also just plain weird. For all their boasts about wanting to create a shared universe, Marvel seems to spend every opportunity it can find to keep the Netflix stuff at arms’ length, to the point where you question why they’re even in the same continuity in the first place. If Strange must have some human connection, why couldn’t it have been Claire Temple? For one thing, Claire’s character is much more interesting than Christine’s (and Rosario Dawson is a much better actor than McAdams. Sorry, but it’s true), and it would be a great opportunity to bridge the gap between the movies and Netflix shows without having to bog the narrative down with exposition. But as I’ve said numerous times in the past, Marvel are more interested in creating a BIG shared universe than a coherent one.

Finally there’s the villains. Nearly always the worst aspect of any MCU film and Strange is no different. We have Kaecilius, played by Hannibal’s Mads Mikkelsen whose performance is more wooden than Pinocchio, and Dormammu, played by Benedict Cumberbatch who seems to be competing with Andy Serkis as to who can play the most CGI/motion capture characters. Both, unsurprisingly, are shite. Kaecilius wants to save the world from death by allowing Dormammu to destroy it.

I don’t get it either.

So you’re probably wondering who was Kaecilius in the comics. I mean I’ve explained everything else, haven’t I? And honestly, I haven’t the faintest idea. Turns out he was a henchman of Baron Mordo who I completely forgot about because he barely ever shows up in the comics. So... they turned Baron Mordo into the black sidekick so that the villain could be played by a white guy. Oh. And guess what race Kaecilius is in the comics.

YYYYYep. He’s Asian. I guess all the Asian actors were sick that day, so they had to cast a white guy.

Oh and you’ll never guess what his backstory is. You’re right! He has none! Other than references to some tragedy, we know absolutely fuck all about him. Critics actually liked this movie?!?!

Oh and don’t get me started on the humour.

Kaecilius: “Mr...?”

Strange: “Doctor.”

Kaecilius: “Mr. Doctor?”

Strange: “No, it’s Strange.”

Kaecilius: “I guess so. Who am I to judge?”

Dear God, someone was paid to write that.

Then there’s the Big Bad Dormammu from the Dark Dimension. (Yes, the same Dark Dimension from Agent Carter and nope, that’s never referenced. In fact this doesn’t even look like the same Dark Dimension as the one from Agent Carter. Although, to be fair, I’d want to forget Season 2 happened as well considering how fucking terrible it was, but come on guys!). In the comics Dormammu is a mystical entity that has a quote ‘unnatural obsession with our material universe’. Could be interesting to explore. Oh but I forget, this is an MCU film. They don’t want interesting. They want safe. So instead we get a purple, floating CGI head and the generic destroyer of worlds archetype. (In fact Dormammu weirdly has more in common with Galactus than the actual Dormammu. Sometimes I wonder if anyone at Marvel Studios have ever even so much as glanced at one of their own comics before).

In conclusion, is this the worst film I’ve ever seen? Admittedly no. It’s not that bad. If you switch your brain off, I can imagine someone having a good time with this film. But you see that’s the problem. You shouldn’t have to switch your brain off to enjoy Doctor Strange. If anything the opposite is true. The comics, despite their faults, were intelligent, surreal and thought provoking, asking questions about our universe and our place within it. Steve Ditko (and only Steve Ditko. The late Stan Lee may have put pen to paper, but it was ultimately Ditko’s ideas and vision, which makes the gratuitous Stan Lee cameo in this film particularly galling to me) created something truly captivating in Doctor Strange. Despite the racial caricatures and white saviour tropes, I still love these comics because of how it explores the world and our relation to that world. How we are just small cogs in a massive and intricate machine. It’s truly groundbreaking and would influence many other comics to come. The Doctor Strange movie doesn’t even begin to do that. It won’t influence anyone. It won’t make anyone think or question their role in the cosmos. In fact, three years later, despite being a huge box office success, it’s largely been forgotten. And that’s a crying shame because Strange deserves so much more.

Doctor Strange may not be the worst comic book movie ever made, but it’s a terrible adaptation of the source material. Anything that made it unique or interesting was carefully removed with surgical precision under the guise of making it more progressive, when in reality they just wanted to make it profitable. But profitable doesn’t mean good, and Doctor Strange doesn’t even come close to being a good movie. I would love to have seen what a director like David Lynch or Ang Lee would have done with this psychedelic material. This movie could and should have been the most intelligent and surreal comic book movie that’s ever been made. A perfect opportunity to allow a visionary filmmaker to go wild and express themselves artistically. Instead it’s just another MCU movie. It’s such a shame.

And people wonder why I’m worried about Deadpool joining the MCU.

[eldritchsurveys]

o12.

Have you ever sold anything online either on Craigslist, eBay, Amazon, etc.? If not, what is your website of choice like any of the above for buying things? >> Nope. My website of choice for buying things is Amazon, I guess, just because it’s easy and they have so much shit. If the opportunity arose, would you ever go to a nude beach? Do you think you’d be comfortable enough, being naked among others like that? >> Yeah, I’d try it. I suppose it couldn’t be all that bad, if everyone else is nude too. Levels the playing field, and all. But I wouldn’t want to like... sit on stuff butt-naked. Like, that’s the main thing that bothers me about just walking around nude -- I don’t want to put my unprotected parts on stuff, bruh. So... yeah, I guess I wouldn’t stay long for that reason. At least let me put some bikini bottoms on or something, damn. What was the last book you read? What about the book drew you to want to read it (plot, title, cover…)? Did you end up liking it? >> Dune Messiah. What drew me to it is that it’s the second book in the series I’ve dedicated myself to reading, so it was just the logical progression. I did indeed like it. Have you ever considered keeping a dream journal? If you have one, have you ever looked back on it at all of the odd/interesting dreams you used to have? >> I try to keep one, but my dream recall is very sporadic and unpredictable. Sometimes I look back at what I do have, yeah. Do you think regifting is cheap, or is it okay? Have you ever regifted before? >> I wholly approve of regifting. I think it makes more sense to give something to someone who will actually use or appreciate it, rather than hanging onto something just because... what, someone gave it to me? Like, I appreciate being given the gift, because the thought really does count to me, but if I’m not going to use the thing, then why would I let this perfectly good object go to waste just collecting dust in the closet or something when I can give it to someone who’ll actually enjoy it???? LOGIC

How often do you wash your hair? What do you think when you hear of some people not washing their hair for weeks at a time? Is it healthier, as they claim? >> Every couple of weeks or so. --Well, seeing as I’m one of those people, I don’t think much of anything, because it’s normal to me. I don’t care, this is what works for me and I’m going to keep doing it until something else works better. Do you think President Obama should stay in office, or is it time for a new president? >> Damn, bruh. In general, do you like/get along with your mother’s or your father’s side of the family more? >> --- Have you ever seen an animal give birth? Have you ever had a pet give birth before? >> Yeah, and not my pet but my friend’s pet. I’ve also seen a cat eat its kittens! It was very enthralling. What do your plans usually consist of on Christmas morning? Are they the same this year? >> These past two Christmases I was at Sparrow’s parents’ house, and I guess the first time it was novel and exciting, but the second time I was way over the performative-ness and those people and just... blaaagh. But I assume I’ll be doing the same thing this year, probably day-drinking and trying not to talk to anyone. Do you like iPads/tablets or laptops more? E-readers or books? >> I mean, I use my laptops almost exclusively. And when it comes to books, I really don’t give a damn, man. I use both at my leisure. If you don’t get much snow where you live, do you wish you did get more snow? If you do get snow where you live, do you get a lot? Do you like snow? >> Enough snow falls in West Michigan that I am usually quite sick of it by March or so. Also, winter has a habit of outstaying its welcome to a depressing degree, so by May I want to die. LMAO. --In general, yeah, I like snow, but like... moderation, man. If men could get pregnant too, would abortion still be as big an issue as it is? >> Hm. What is something you want to try to accomplish within the next year? >> I’m not sure. Have you ever had to “come out” to your parents about anything (sexual orientation, change in religion, etc.)? How did it go? >> I tried to explain being trans to my father once, lmao. It was actually pretty funny, because I was like, explaining hormone replacement therapy to him, and he was just like “.... hunh.” Like I think he was mostly just confused, lmao. But I mean, in general, I’m an adult. I don’t have to tell him anything about my life if I don’t want to, so it’s not a big deal. Do you ever get drunk by yourself? >> Yeah. Who else am I supposed to get drunk with, besides the people in my head? But I’m mostly over getting drunk, anyway. I mostly just drink until the light buzz now, and then stop there. I’m still thinking about whether getting ritualistically drunk (with Wednesday, for example) is a thing I want to continue... I’m not sure yet. I think if I do, it’ll only be with specific drinks (like maybe this 1000 Stories wine, which I still think he put into my hand in the first place), to further emphasise the ritual boundaries and also to control it a little (liquor is temperamental and the delayed release doesn’t help either, but wine is easier to control). Has there ever been a time where you’ve forgotten something extremely important? >> I mean, yeah, sure. Describe the last time you were infuriated. >> Infuriated... I feel like the last time I felt that way was because of some bullshit in the PixelCount Discord. That’s why I left that shit, I got tired. What’s the most unusual kind of pizza you’ve ever tried? >> I’m not sure. If you were given the chance to decorate an entire house the way you wanted, with no limit to cost, how would you decorate it? >> I’d need some time to think about that. If you could have any kind of lava lamp, what kind would you have? >> Any kind? I’ve never had one at all. What movie do you know by heart? >> I used to know Labyrinth pretty much backwards and forwards, but my last rewatch was a long while ago. I need to get back on that train. I know the songs of The Prince of Egypt pretty well, and some of the dialogue. I used to be good with The Crow but it’s been a long time for that one, too. Has there ever been a time where you thought you were going to be great friends with someone, but it just never happened? >> I don’t think so. What’s one of your favorite things to touch/feel? >> Certain kinds of stuffed animal fur. How often do you wear tights? >> I don’t. If you had to choose, what’s the most important thing in your life at the moment? >> I don’t like to rank things like this. Do you have Netflix? >> I do. How much money would you have to spend before you felt really guilty about spending that much? >> Hell, I feel guilty about spending $2 at Redbox (”but I can just wait until it’s on Netflix, or pirate it!!! this is a Waste” shut the fuck up, goblin brain, life is short). Has there ever been anything you’ve become interested in much later than other people? >> Yeah, lmao. I’m kinda slow sometimes. Why is your favorite TV show your favorite? >> LOL I keep forgetting to mention Metalocalypse as a favourite, too, but man, my feels about that show are legion. I love it because it’s hilarious, but also because I really actually care about this silly fucking death metal band and their longsuffering manager and the Doomstar that will herald their ascension and... just everything. I love that show so fucking much and I miss it every day of my life. Grey’s Anatomy is my favourite because it really hits me in the feels, like... I don’t cry about a lot of things but I’ve cried at half the Grey’s episodes I’ve seen. It just really does humanity well... like, it has some of the most honest and compassionate writing that I’ve ever seen. It’s an utterly amazing and heartfelt and joyful and sorrowful show and I’m so glad I started watching it. Person of Interest is my favourite because... wow. Again, amazing writing, just amazing. Such complex and emotional characters, and the whole Machine thing is just... right up my alley, man. An artificial superintelligence learning to truly appreciate humanity for what it is, like... I don’t know. I don’t know. It hits me right in the gut. I still get choked up about the ending of that show. God. Describe your favorite picture of yourself, or post it. >> I don’t have a single favourite photo. Is there a genre of music that some people would be surprised that you enjoy? >> Probably not, if they know anything about me. Assuming you have a Facebook, if one of your friends posted things that annoyed you, would you be more likely to delete them as a friend, hide their statuses, or just put up with it? >> I’d hide their statuses for a while, but if it got so I was never looking at their page, I’d just unfriend them. What’s the point, then? Have you ever had a veggie burger? >> Of course. Do you like candles? >> Yep. What’s your favorite video game? >> Pillars of Eternity, Dragon Age, Elder Scrolls, Guitar Hero, the list goes on. What was something you liked about today? >> Fuckin H O T GATORADE, god. fucking... god. LMFAO. When was the last time you passed out? >> I don’t know. Do you think “friends with benefits” relationships could ever possibly work without anyone getting hurt? >> I’m sure someone’s gotten it to work. Like, it’s a big world out there. Do you wear more sweatshirts or jackets? >> Hoodies. What was the last thing you had to drink? >> I had like half a Backwoods Bastard. I didn’t even finish it, it’s still on my desk. When was the last time you wore a sports bra? >> The last time I went out. When was the last time you went to a water park? >> Never. Does your best friend live close to you? >> --- Have you ever rode a train? >> I’ve ridden many a train. Where did you get the shirt you’re currently wearing? >> I’m just wearing an undershirt. This Night Vale hoodie used to be Sparrow’s. When was the last time you played Rock Band? With whom? >> It’s been a while. I usually play Guitar Hero because the guitar controller is more compatible with it. There’s a slight difference in how shit registers on Rock Band that messes me up a lot, and I haven’t felt like dealing with it. But I miss the RB songs, so I might try to make it work at some point. Maybe I just need to calibrate my shit. What was the last thing that you ate? >> A pack of those Captain’s Wafers crackers. The peanut butter and honey ones, the best kind!!!! I’m so glad I finally found a Meijer that sells the boxes, goddamn, finally. Who last messaged you on Facebook? >> Uh... probably my cousin Kythe, with another fucking chain IM thing. I’m about to block her ass, lmfao. What were you doing Saturday at 1:30 pm? >> I don’t remember. The last time you were intoxicated, what were you drinking? >> Mango-pineapple vodka and orange juice. It’s so delicious, too, and that’s the fucking problem -- I drink it because it tastes good, and next thing you know... Who last walked you home? >> --- What do you do to help your face from breaking out? >> Wash it. It takes care of the rest on its own. Did you make any new friends lately? If so, what are their names and how did you meet them? >> --- Would you rather see your favourite band/artist in concert with 2 other people or have a free $20,000 shopping spree to Walmart? >> What on earth am I going to buy at Walmart for that much money, lmao... I’d rather spend that kind of money somewhere else, so I guess I’d take the concert. I’d choose a band that doesn’t come to the US often. >:3 When was the last time you went out to eat? >> When I was in Chicago. On a scale of 1-10, how anxious are you currently? >> Er... 1? What kind of music do you listen to? >> The audible kind. What does your perfect day consist of? >> Meh. Do you have any online friends? >> Whatever friends I do have are online. Would you dye your hair red? >> Sure. If your ex wanted to take you back, would you say yes? >> I mean, that’s basically what happened innit lmao :B How is the weather? >> I don’t know, mild, I guess.  

[fxikb0ay-blog]

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[jillmckenzie1]

A Man of Focus

Let’s begin with something that’s indisputable. On April 1, 2009, Alfonso Hernandez and Michael Edmonds thought it would be funny to shoot a dog dead. Why? All cruelty has ever needed to flourish is an opportunity. In this case, Hernandez and Edmonds saw a yellow Labrador puppy outside a home. They shot the dog with a .357 Magnum pistol, then stood over her body, laughing.

In addition to being evil, this was a seriously dumb move. The puppy’s name was Dasy. Her guardian was Marcus Luttrell, a SEAL team member awarded the Navy Cross for heroism in combat while serving in Afghanistan. He was the only survivor of a particularly vicious firefight. Dasy was given to Luttrell to help with the healing process. Her name is an acronym for the names of the men Luttrell served alongside.

Armed with a pistol, Luttrell snuck up on Hernandez and Edmonds. He took aim. They saw him, hopped in their car, and fled. Undeterred, Luttrell pursued them in his pickup. Across three counties. For 40 miles at speeds approaching 100 miles per hour. During the chase, Luttrell was on the phone with a 911 operator, and he was quoted as saying, “You need to get someone out here because if I catch them, I’m going to kill them.”*

Does that sound a little familiar? This is how myths are born. A real event happens. A storyteller takes the core event and runs with it. Yet a great deal of our modern mythology is found in movies, and it doesn’t all have to do with the Avengers. One of the latest additions to American film mythology, 2014’s John Wick, told the story of a grieving widower who received a preposterously cute puppy as the last gift from his wife. Assorted scumbags kill the puppy and take the widower’s car. Did I mention that the widower is a legendarily lethal assassin? The film wasn’t just a hit—it cemented itself as a benchmark, a necessary addition to action cinema. Now, the maybe-or-maybe-not conclusion of the trilogy, John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum, has arrived. Holy hell, has it ever.

All three films are tightly plotted together, and in order to understand what the heck has happened, you need to either have seen the preceding two films or read this handy recap.

In the first film, Wick (Keanu Reeves) was able to get revenge for the death of his puppy Daisy by killing a lot of bad people. When John Wick: Chapter Two gets going, Wick is immediately dealing with the theft of his car. He’s also reluctantly drawn into a plot by Santino (Riccardo Scamarcio), a crook with dreams of ascending to the High Table, the ruling council of a global criminal syndicate. Things went sideways. Wick ended up killing the hell out of Santino. Unfortunately, he did this at The Continental, a hotel for assassins and safe ground. “Conducting business” is a no-no at The Continental, and Wick conducted business extremely enthusiastically.

So, does Wick get a slap on the wrist and a stern lecture from Winston (Ian McShane), the manager of The Continental? He does not. Instead, Wick has been declared excommunicado. There’s a $14 million price on his head, and every killer is crawling out of the woodwork just to take their shot.** This is where Chapter Three begins. Wick is a pretty sharp cookie, and he has both a short-term and long-term plan.

The short-term plan is to brutally kill anyone who comes after him, and he does so hilariously at the New York Public Library. The long-term plan is to head for Casablanca, track down The Elder—the head of the High Table, and make amends. To do that, he’ll need to first ask The Director (Anjelica Huston) for help getting him out of the United States. Next, he’ll need to find Sofia (Halle Berry), a disgruntled former associate, and ask for her help. Sounds like a cakewalk, right?

While all of Wick’s globetrotting and head smashing is going on, the High Table is making its own moves. They have sent out The Adjudicator (Asia Kate Dillon) to punish everyone involved with helping Wick in the past. Both Winston and The Bowery King (Laurence Fishburne) are informed they have seven days to relinquish control of their empires. The Adjudicator has the muscle to enforce this, as she’s brought along Zero (Mark Dacascos), a sushi chef/ninja who’s also a massive fan and rival of John Wick.

These days, action/adventure movies can be broadly separated into two categories. The first is FX heavy, consisting of your MCU and Star Wars films. By utilizing CGI, filmmakers can bring us everything from Daisy Ridley jumping over a TIE fighter to Josh Brolin throwing a moon at Robert Downey Jr. There’s an artistry to CGI that, when utilized by the right people, the results can be spectacular. Equally spectacular is the second category, films that lean hard into stunt choreography. These films are like a dance, requiring intense precision and training.

John Wick: Chapter 3 is directed by Chad Stahelski, one of the most talented and innovative stunt professionals working today. Watch how he shoots action sequences. Instead of dizzying edits, we can see long takes and appreciate the extensive training his cast and crew went through. His decades of experience brought us well-shot and innovative action scenes involving gunplay, knife fights, horse-fu, motorcycle chases, death by book, and a dog running up a wall to maul a luckless henchman.*** There is an exhausting amount of action here. Stahelski has also made a genuinely gorgeous-looking film. He’s got a knack for arresting imagery, everything from neon reflected in rainy streets to golden sand dunes. It all comes together to feel operatic, bigger than a regular action movie. I loved it, and my only criticism with his direction is that the pacing occasionally feels a little sluggish.

Returning writer Derek Kolstad, along with co-writers Shay Hatten, Chris Collins, and Marc Abrams, have delivered unto us a good news/bad news scenario. The good news is that Parabellum very nearly hits the sweet spot between the intensity of the first film and the fascinating world-building of the second. We learn more about the Continental, the High Table, and even a little of the origins of Wick himself. The script also feels like a meditation on fame and how it feels. Everywhere Wick goes, people recognize him and want a piece of him, and in the end, he just wants people to leave him the hell alone so he can grieve for his wife and play with his dog.

The bad news is that as much as we learn more about the world of John Wick, we don’t learn as much about how Wick and the other characters feel about it. During the first film, Keanu Reeves digs into a meaty performance—one of the best of his career. Ever had a loved one pass away, and while you’re trying to deal with their loss, the world keeps intruding? That’s what the first film is really about—a genuinely evil man who’s given a possibly unearned chance to redeem himself, and how that redemption falls apart. At this point in the series, so much has been taken away from John Wick. If an action scene had been trimmed and a bit more time had been devoted to emotional combat, we might have had a film that delivered an even bigger impact.

There’s never a moment with the cast where I was disappointed. Laurence Fishburne’s booming hamminess. Ian McShane’s worn-out elegance. Mark Dacascos’ nerdy enthusiasm. It’s all delightful. Anjelica Huston shows up for a minute as the sly head of a school for killers, and improv legend Jason Mantzoukas even appears briefly. I thoroughly enjoyed Halle Berry as Sofia, and she’s able to bring something real to a role that was a little smaller than I would have liked. Despite having won an Academy Award, I think Berry has never quite gotten the respect she deserves as a performer. Here, she’s put in serious tactical training, dog training, and on top of all that, she delivers an emotionally touching moment.

If the John Wick franchise is an ever-expanding wheel of bizarre rituals and crazy characters, Keanu Reeves is the still center. I’d love to get a look at the script, as I suspect he has no more than 200 lines of dialogue. It’s unfortunate that the kind of acting that Reeves is doing here will go largely unappreciated. Other actors would be tempted to go big. Reeves keeps things locked down, and his legendary blankness is actually a mask of professionalism hiding a grieving man in search of a little order. Consider an early scene located at the library. Wick has gone there to retrieve some necessary supplies hidden in a book, along with a photo of his wife. An assassin takes a shot at him. They fight, and Wick uses the book as a viciously effective weapon. Once the combat has finished, Wick takes the time to put the book back exactly where it goes. That moment tells you everything you need to know, and Reeves sells it perfectly.

Is the character of John Wick really based on Marcus Luttrell and the horrific night of April 1, 2009? I don’t know. While I’ve read in some places that he was an inspiration, I suspect it doesn’t really matter. What matters in a myth isn’t necessarily its origins. Strip away the guns, blades, and mayhem, and John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum feels like an opera, myth, or folk tale. Heightened themes, a story told through violence, and a man forced to confront what he truly is.

    *As a fast side note, Hernandez and Edmonds both pled guilty to animal cruelty. Hernandez got two years in state prison with a $1000 fine. They went a little easier on Edmonds, as he testified against his buddy and was sentenced to five years of felony probation.

**One of my favorite things about this franchise is the idea that New York alone is home to something like 600,000 professional killers. Think about that next time you stiff your server on the tip.

***This may look like a CGI pooch, but trust me when I tell you it ain’t. Click here to learn more about the stunt and the Very Good Boy who handled it.

from Blog https://ondenver.com/a-man-of-focus/

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Who gives cheap car insurance for young drivers?

How can I get cheaper car insurance?

I live in Toronto, but my address on my liscence is in a smaller town about an hour out of the city. The car that I have is registered on my husbands Toronto lisence. I want to buy insurance using my out of the city address so it will be cheaper. Would I be able to do this even though I technically live in Toronto?""

Do anybody know of any cheap health insurance?

I haven't had any insurance since 2007.

Anyone got a rough idea what 3 points on a licence will cost to my insurance policy?

I have just been served a Notice Of Intended Prosecution for doing 37mph in a 30mph zone & the mandatory penalty is a 60 fine & 3 points on my licence.I won't know until I get the conviction code to give to my Insurers (Churchill). My renewal will be in Jan 08. Up to now, the licence is clean, 5 years No Claims. I just wanted to get a rough idea what the 3 points will add in money terms if anyone can help. Thanks in advance.""

Is it legal to do this with car insurance?

I know of people who do this for the sake of saving money, but I am not sure if it is legal or not? Say Person A has horrible insurance rates to the point of where driving is impossible to afford. Now let's say Person A sells their car to their significant other, Person B for a small price and transfers the title into Person B's name, so now this car on Person B's active insurance policy. Person B's rates will go up a bit based on their cost to insure, however Person A will still be driving this vehicle on a regular basis, and simply pay Person B the additional, much cheaper premium. Is this legal? If not, how would anyone ever know the difference? Now the new""

Can i get insurance if i got 3points on my licence?

basicaly i got done for having a pasenger on back of my ped when i had a provisional so i now have 3 points on my licence, when i get my licence and get a motorbike or car will i still be able to get insurance or not? nand will it cost alot more.""

How long does it take to get health insurance?

I need health insurance from any company quick. Money is no problem. How long does it take to get me insured once iv'e signed up? and anyone know a company that can get me insured fast?

If i buy a car before i turn seventeen how much can i expect to pay for insurance?

i was thinking a car like a tiburon. any comments? ideas? reccomendations? what kind of car should i get???

How much would (teen driver) insurance cost?

I was wondering how much car insurance would cost for a teen driver? Info: Black Grand Cherokee (if that matters) Male 17 years old. 3.5 gpa

What is the average insurance price for the new 2010 Chevy Camaro's? CURRENT 2010 CAMARO OWNERS ONLY PLEASE!?

I'm interested in purchasing a Chevy Camaro(2LT or 2SS), and I wanted to see how much current owners pay for their insurance. I'm 22 years old and I've got a clean driving record as well. Please let me know what you know! I don't feel like being spammed by insurance companies. I've gotten the free quote before and I still get emails from Geico! Thanks!""

What does it take to commit a minor and how do you afford it if you don't have health insurance?

My uncle and aunt are struggling with my 16 year old cousin who suffers from anorexia and she will go up to 3 weeks without eating anything. I am not kidding she only drinks water and then she will slowly puree some fruit into her water again for about a week or two before she binges for a few days and then goes back to this cycle of starvation. She looks pale and has no energy. Her eyes are sunken in and she hides in her room. My aunt and uncle are immigrants and they don't speak english that well. They don't have a lot of money or health insurance and I have no idea what to do but they are asking me to help! I've never dealt with this type of situation before and I'm just thinking they should call an ambulance and maybe they'll commit her to some state institution? I've been googling this and I come across all kinds of conflicting information. How can she get help in the state of California and is there any way if they are not insured to pay for her treatment? Is there any state aid related to extreme cases of anorexia?

Used Car insurance cost?

If i buy a 2010 ford escape used will insurance be any cheaper than if i buy it new, considering im 25 and have a clean driving record""

How much does it cost to buy and insure a car (17 year old)?

Just passed my test, looking for a car to use Which is the best car to insure and run, and what is the best insurance quote I live in a bad post code area which is one if the highest rates and i dont want a black box and i need to do alot of driving after 11 o clock""

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? How old are you? what kind of deuctable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance.

How do insurance companies expect 17 year olds to not front?

Im not being funny, but its quite clear that seventeen boys cannot afford to pay 300-500 per month for a car worth 400, there is no possible way to afford that when you are trying to do a-level and your part time job pays you maybe 80-120 per week, its just unreasonable, whats the point in having a license if they expect you to pay that, so i can see why most teens do front""

""What would be the best Ford for me, insurance wise?""

I have been contacting different insurance agencies for quotes and was quoted at 300 for a honda civic give or take some, but the lady told me I am much better off getting a Ford as I would be able to get a way better deal on them as they are easier to insure for people my age (20,m). Which Ford cars are good for this? I know the mustang is outta the question since its a sports car, but I was thinking of a truck or the small ranger truck.""

Does being added to my parent's car insurance as a secondary driver cost money?

Does being added to my parent's car insurance as a secondary driver cost money?

Insurance to drive in Florida?

I am 18 and live in Florida. I don't have my drivers license because my parents say I have to have a job to pay for insurance..Ive been looking for a job for a while now but no one seems to be hiring in my area. I know my parents will pay for my insurance if it was cheaper..right now its around $200. I read that if you're driving someone else's vehicle then you don't need insurance as long as the owner of the vehicle has insurance..can someone please explain this to me? Will I be able to drive without insurance?

Need help finding cheap insurance for a first car?

i'm looking to buy a first car i've been looking at a couple of cars - Mitsubishi colt - VW polo - honda Civic (3door) my mom is willing to go on the policy with me just wanted to know what else i could do for cheaper insurance

Got in accident. not my fault. will my insurance rates go up?

this is in reference to my other question but basically i got in a minor accident and it was the other drivers fault. i just called my insurance and reported but i have to wait until tuesday to talk to an agent. just to alleviate my nerves i need to know now, is it likely my rates will go up? it's not my fault. also all the damage costs will be taken care of by my insurance company right? or the other drivers..?? thank you.""

How much would insurance cost for a mini moto?

How much would insurance cost for a mini moto?

Should I get earthquake insurance?

I live in California. The quote I got was $150K dwelling, $5K personal property. The deductible is $22,500 and the annual premium is $370. Is this worth it?""

Will my insurance rates go up?

My daughter who is 16 yrs old tapped a car from behind at a stop sign. There was no damage done to either car and no injuries. The guy said he was not going to do anything about it since there was no damages. My daughter gave him her information (insurance etc). I called the guy to make sure everything was ok, he said nothing happened to his car or himself but he went ahead and opened a claim because he thought he had to do that. I know that if he decides to ask for damages the insurance will pay. My question to you is if he decides not to ask for damages, will my insurance still go up and will she get points in her driver's license. Also, I'd like to add that we live in California. I have not talked to my insurance (AAA) yet. Thank you""

What is the purpose of a car insurance company giving quotes for the other insurance companies??

Just wondering... could they maybe lie about it? Why would they give quotes of the other companies if theirs isn't as good as the other ones? To me it just sort of seems like they are screwing themselves... Does anybody know why they do this?

I really need some good advice for travel insurance please?

Going to thailand and possibly france or spain to for 1 year. Wats good and why?

Whats the cheapest health insurance for adults ?

im 19 yrs.old have never had health insurance me an my husband need health insurance bad whats a good insurance company thats cheap ? he has juvenile diabetes an smokes i on the other hand do not !

Top life insurance companies in india?

Top life insurance companies in india and its performances

Insurince on a Corvette?

I want to buy a 1974-1983 corvette I am 19 and have a perfect driving record Havent even be pulled over how much whould insurance cost on one I also live in Indiana

New Car/ Insurance.?

I just got a new car, and my mom needs to put me on her insurance. We are with State Farm, will she just go in and say what car it is? or will I have to go in with her with the car?""

Can student loans cover health insurance?

I am attending University and I do not agree with the Health Insurance my University provides. The semester expense is $1875 and it is applied to my tuition costs. Those costs are being covered by a mixture of scholarship and student loans. If I opt to purchase my own student health insurance through a different provider - can I pay for it with Student Loans?

Medical insurance?

Im looking for medical insurance in connecticut that covers ivf treatments completely and consultation fees please help!! Thanksss :)

""What is the best Health insurance, with good maternity coverage?""

I would like to get insurance before I get pregnant because I know they won't give it to you when you're pregnant. So I would like to know who has the best coverage, hospital, pre-natal....etc! Would really like to hear from mothers, and there experience with the providers!!!! Thanks in advance""

Pros and Cons of a motorcycle for a teen?

Both my parents and I have gone over me getting a motorcycle instead of a car, and they're fully behind it. As far as my knowledge, insurance costs are a lot less (but more for me since I'm just starting out) monthly payments on it are lower, more MPG, more eco-friendly, less space and I personally prefer it, and use it as year-long transportation since we're moving to Orange County, Calfornia from Las Vegas (where it never snows). I'm almost of age to get my permit, and I would appreciate it if you could come up with any other possible cons or problems of having a sportbike (Kawasaki Ninja 250r, 2010-2011) instead of an older car. I know repairs, etc would be roughly the same. Thanks.""

""Were can i find cheap car insurance from, for 22-23 yr old woman?""

Were can i find cheap car insurance from, for 22-23 yr old woman?""

""Buying private health insurance, broker or direct?""

I need to purchase a private individual health insurance plan. I am a little confused if I should use a broker or just go direct. There seems to be so many plans out there. I live in Las Vegas, NV. I have received quote both ways and there price seems to be around the same thing so I don't know if there are added benefits from using a broker as to going direct, anyone have any experiences?""

""Health insurance starts in 10 days, but I am sick now. Will they reimburse me?""

If I went to the doctor now, would I be able to submit a claim for reimbursement? My insurance is Aetna. I called them, but they are closed because it is Sunday. Answers/suggestions are appreciated.""

What insurance is best for me?

I am currently 17 years old. I will be turning 18 in early November and my family does not have health insurance. I was wondering if I qualify for anything that will be able to get me low-cost braces or anything orthopedic. My family makes not that much money and I am currently going to be a full-time college student. What insurance or health care would I qualify for? I have been needing braces for a while now and I am really self conscious about my teeth.Im also a legal california resident. I have been thinking about midi cal is that the right choice? Thank you on your help.

Where can I find cheap car insurance for Manhattan?

I recently moved to Manhattan and had to bring my car. I had plan on selling it, but with no luck. So now I have to keep it and now I have no insurance. The car is in storage right now. Can anyone suggest a cheap insurance company to me. I have gotten quotes from Geico, Progressive, All State, State Farm, Nationwide, who all either denied me for a lapse I have had or they cost twice as much as my car payment. I know that I am reaching for the stars.""

""Car insurance, Drive any car?""

My insurance certificate says that I am allowed to drive any privately owned vehicle as long as I have the owners permission to drive it and it is roadworthy and I still own the car I have insured. So even though I own a small and slow car, my insurer will quite happily allow me to drive a 250,000 ferrari as long as I have the owners permission to do so? How does that work out?""

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? How old are you? what kind of deuctable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance.

""What is the punishment for a second offence of driving without insurance ,within a one year period?""

What is the punishment for a second offence of driving without insurance ,within a one year period?""

Will my car insurance rate be based on how long ive been insured or licensed?

I have been insured on several cars regularly since getting each permit (the law in my state, even though I only had a permit, and went through about five permits) and I just got my full license (finally). My license number is the same as it was before when it was on my permit. Which one will my future insurance rates be based on? Length of time insured or length with a full license? Thanks""

Cheap health insurance that will cover dental?

I need some help. I can no longer work at one of my jobs and my new job wont provide insurance since it is part-time I need help and scared that i cant afford anything. i already cant afford student loans. is there any cheap insurance packages i can get in ct?

Cheapest Auto Insurance Humanly Possible?

I am a college student living on campus and want to have a car but will not be driving it much at all. I am just looking for the most basic and least expensive auto insurance I can find. I am 19 with no tickets or accidents yada yada yada. Where can I find some cheap coverage?

Help with Car insurance?

Hi I am wanting some help with Car and Car insurance. I am 17 years old and soon I will be taking my 1st driving lesson. I hope to be passed by September 2014 fingers crossed. However all the buzz of driving hits you hard when you look at insurance and you think. How can I get 3000 to 5500 just like that. Well I have been saving my money and only have 500 pound. I have a birthday in march and Christmas is soon so all the money I get I will save for insurance. Now to the main bit. My brother is going to be giving me is Citron C2 because he is getting a new car in September I was thinking is it possible for me to get cheap insurance some how. the main reason because I don't want to be pay 3k out. My brother had to pay this but now is insurance for the C2 is very cheap. I was wondering when he gets is new car if he also puts insurance on the C2 and me as the second driver and I pay him money every month or something. Or is there anything else I can do? Thanks Kieren

My own insurance?

In High school I was on my parents insurance and then I moved out with my boyfriend and got put on his parents insurance, but Im pretty sure his mom is lying to us about how much the insurance costs. We payed a varied amount (75-200) every 2 weeks for a couple months and then that same varied about after that per month. I feel bad about not trusting her but I want to have my own insurance. Mainly because I want to be self sufficient and pay my own everything! How do I go about getting insurance for me and my boyfriend?""

I'm moving out of state - do I have to change auto insurance companies?

Explanation - I went through a local auto insurance company called ABC Insurance (not the real name, btw). They got me the lowest rate through XYZ Insurance, out of a different state. I'm moving out of state in a few weeks. Do I have to worry about finding a new insurance company if the one I pay my bill to is out of state anyway? After the move, I will actually be physically closer to that company... but still out of state. I never deal with ABC anyway. It's like they are just the go-between that found me that company.""

Does defective equipment increase insurance rates?

I live in Virginia and it's time to renew my auto insurance policy by the end of this month with Progressive, and I've got a Defective Equipment charge coming back from 3/8/2010 causing my rates to go up. I am not sure why this is causing my rates to go up because its not a moving violation and it carries no demerit points with DMV, its simply an equipment charge. The charge is vague and could mean anything really...from a taillight out, to a hanging exhaust, to a bent wheel, to even a headlight out. I'm going back and forth with the insurance company about this because its rediculous that this kind of charge would cause an increase in my rates. They stated that this info came from a C.L.U.E. report...I know what a C.L.U.E. report is and its pretty much a bunch of reports in one including my Motor Vehicle Report, which is where they are getting the Defective Equipment . I spoke with a lawyer that I know from a few years back on a seperate traffic case, and he even mentioned that he thinks it's a lie to have rates go up for this sort of charge. He also advised to look for different insurance which I would rather not do, simply because it does not seem right and if they raise my rates for it, then they are raising other peoples rates who have the same charge Any help is appreciated, thanks in advance.""

How much is car insurance?

I'm 17 and would be going under my moms I know she has State Farm and hers is cheap like 600 a year. I'm a girl and want the Scion TC probably the 2006 or 2007 model. I also have the b student discount and I took drivers ed. So I was just wondering how much my insurance would be, thanks!""

Health insurance?

i am 22 years old and i have no health insurance and a LOT of health problems. does anyone know any affordable health insurance plans that would cover pills or partial of the pills, doctor visits, or most of the doctor visit, and hospital bills. i live in new jersey""

How do I get insurance on my first car?

I'm getting my first car soon, but have no insurance. Do I need to buy insurance before buying the car, and if so, how? If not, how long of a grace period do I have to get insurance after getting the car? I live in florida, and can't find the info I need on it. Thx much!""

How much is your insurance (4 cyl cars only)?

I am thinking about getting a saturn sc1 and just wondering how much my insurance will go down. right now I pay $100 a month for a v8 88' mustang convertable. Thats pretty cheap for a mustang I hear and I just want some people are paying for newer 4cyl insurance.

Whats the cheapest auto insurance plan?

I hate insurance. I have no reason so far to need it. I'm a safe driver and i do not want my money to be drained into some company, which in time, will get more money from me than they spend to fix whatever may happen to my car. I don't want a flashy car. I only need a cheap one. So i could care less about dents and stuff. What is literally the cheapest auto insurance plan i can get in California? cheapest dollar for dollar.""

""Am I required to add my 16 year old student driver to my auto insurance policy, we live in Illinois.?""

As the student drivers parent, is my current auto insurance coverage in effect and still valid (for me and my 16 yr old) when my 16 year old student driver is driving my vehicle (supervised driving\practice), even though I have not added them as a driver on my auto insurance policy. We live in Illinois. After the student driver receives their official drivers license am I required to add them as a driver to my auto ins policy, or am I and this new driver still covered by my policy because I have given them permission to operate my vehicle?""

Does anyone know of Affordable Health Insurance for a Women in her 20s?

I will be 22 in a Month and recently tried to donate plasma and was told my blood sugar level was to high and they were concerned I may have diasbetes. I'm not covered by my parents health insurance anymore and I really need to find something that could help me. I do have a job and probably will have to work full time in order to get any health benefits. But is there something else out there anyone knows of where I can afford to pay for health expences?? I appreciate greatly. Thanks!

What are some cheap but nice older cars to insure?

I am 16 and I am looking to get an older car, i am hoping for a 79 Firebird, mustang or a camaro, but i am just looking for something relatively cheap in all categories. I don't have to worry about repairs, as i can do all the work at my school. PS would it be expensive to insure a car from the late 60s? like a charger?""

Parents: 300cc motorcycle vs. 600cc motorcycle?

If you had a 17 year old son and he wanted a motorcycle would it make a difference to you if he started out on a low displacement motorcycle instead of a high displacement motorcycle or would you say no/yes either way.

Cheapest car insurance? Don't care if my car gets damaged.?

Hi, I have a really old car that I just want to use to get around town. I don't care if it gets damaged in a crash or whatever, because it already looks terrible. SO, how do I get the most basic and cheapest car insurance? Does anybody know what company will charge the least for insurance?""

Car insurance?????

what is the cheapest and the best for full coverage?

Where can i get cheap car insurance?

ive not yet actually got a car, but i acted like i have on these insurance compare sites, and no matter what car i (pretend) to have its coming up as over 1000 a year, im 27 female and have just passed my driving test, i have a secure drive, do you know any insurance that would give me low payments per month, for a small car dating any thing from the 90s to now, thanks, or who are you with and how much is your insurance each month and what car do you have thanks again""

Whay is insurance? why is it necessary? types of insurance?

i need more about insurance. what is assurance?principles of insurance?

WILL MY CAR INSURANCE BE HIGH?!?

I am 16 male, and I have a 2006 Honda Civic Sedan 4 door black currently living in NYC Long Island and I want to know what is my Insurance rate. How much would I have to pay every month please tell me every month not year !! Thanks ALSO FOR POINTS PLEASE TELL ME HOW MUCH FOR A 2002-2006 Honda accord !!""

How much is Motorcycle insurance for a 16-17 year old?

I talked to geico and they told me that it would cost about $800 a year for insurance for only 1000 miles. Is this the case for most insurances? I have good grades and i am required to take a safety course before i get my motorcycle permit (i dont know if these will give me discounts though). I drive a 2006 Kawasaki klr 650. Thanks

How much is your liability car insurance?

price per month? your age? your state? car year and model?

Will insurance cover a salvage car?

I need to know cuz im buying a car. what insurance company will cover it. and will it be expensive??

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? How old are you? what kind of deuctable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance.

Driving without insurance?

I got pulled over for driving someone else's car in the wrong lane. He had his insurance in the glove box, but all i had was my license. I got my license less than a month ago, but dont have any insurance of my own. i got a ticket for improper lane and have to go to court. Is there a grace period for insurance or am i completely and utterly screwed? I live in Illinois btw""

Will my insurance skyrocket after this ticket?

I got my first speeding ticket the other day.. 70 in a 50. I'm 20 and only a few months away from turning 21 (when rates go down a little). I know there are other things that factor in to this but how much can I expect my insurance rates to go up? Should I pay the court fines and just request supervision to keep it off of my record?

Does my car insurance help me get another car if my car is totalled?

I was in a car accident last week, which wasn't my fault. The auto body shop said my car is totalled because of the damages, it can't get fixed. The other person's insurance is going to pay it off because of the loss, I have full coverage and my question is, can my insurance get my another car or do I have to get it myself? I got it in April, gave a down payment, and have only made one payment. I need a car badly for work!!""

Employer health insurance?

When you have employer health insurance is there a waiting period for maturnity coverage to start?

CAR INSURANCE rip off - I was involved in a car accident that wasnt my fault?

Insurance co.deducted $334 from my settlement so the policy is paid in full till July 2010.If I buy another car the policy doesnt transfer to the new car!They have robbed me $334 ? Wont mention the insurance co.(RACV) ooops!

Can i get cheap insurance on vw scirocco for first car?

im going to be getting my full license soon and im thinking to buy the scirocco for my first car but have been put of by the insurance that i will need to pay as im gonna be a new driver, the price id need to pay yearly is 4500 which is a lot and pretty much the same as owning a jeep GCsrt8 for your first car. i was wondering is there cheaper option?""

Good auto insurance providers?

I am 21 and just getting first car and looking for some good insurance companies with affordable rates?

Best car & car insurance for a 20 year old?

I'm 20 years old and just started having driving lessons. I'm thinking of buying a car but have no idea about car insurance. I know it would be higher for 17-19 year olds but do I qualify as a young driver if I'm 20 even though it's a first car and just starting as a driver? I love Volkswagen Beetles but want a car on which the insurance won't be high. Apparently the insurance is cheaper on classic cars...? I'm a girl and live in Greater (West) London. I don't know what it depends on and what car I should go for without having to pay a fortune. If you could help me out that would be great Thanks!!! :)

Would you get heath insurance and if so who through?

Me and my husband married young, when we married I had insurance through my job which was great but now, since I went back to school we are without insurance. I am in school ft and he also works but is two hours under what he has to be working to get insurance a week. We are 21 now and are wondering if you view health insurance as something someone our age needs and if so how to shop for it, what type to get and where to get a quote. We are both EMTS and have ran rescue before and we have seen lots of people without insurance but we want to make a well informed decision regarding this health insurance. Might I add that we are generally healthy, have a general practitioner at the moment that we rarely use, and during our marriage of two years have never been to an ER for any reason... Any insite that you have into this situation would be great! Thanks and God Bless""

How dos US car insurance work compared to english car insurance?

I'm looking to get a bmw x5 but insurance is 9000k a year like $13000k I heard they do it different so its easier to get bigger cars. In england they don't allow young drivers to get big cars so the insurance is expensive How dos us car insurance work

""If I get an insurance quote from a price comparison site, am I guaranteed the cheapest price?

Is there likely to be hidden costs?

""Motorcycle insurance, big problem?""

Ok, so ive been riding a motorcycle for more than a year now. and ive had my eye on a 2009 ninja zx-6r. so i asked a guy from state farm what full coverage would be and he told me around 1000. which is really good. so i bought the bike and went back to him. turns out it will actually be around 4000-5000. WTF. is there anything i can do? or am i just s.o.l.?""

How much would extra would i pay for another car on my policy?

I currently own 2 cars and am looking to buy another one. It is a 99 crown vic police int P71. I dont want collision or anything extra, i want the lowest insurance policy that i can get. Im taking that, that would be a liability only policy, am i correct? If not what kind of policy do i ask for? Also, how much more a month would this cost? No one will steal it because its a former cop car, but you couldnt tell and i doubt i will reck it.""

Will a reduced 1 point Defective Headlamps ticket affect my auto insurance?

I was pulled over for turning onto a one way street the wrong way, which is a 3 point ticket in Denver. If I pay within the first 20 days the ticket is reduced to a 1 point Defective Headlamps ticket. My parents have state farm insurance. Will they be notified of this ticket through the insurance and will my insurance rates increase? I'd rather them not know, and the cop said my insurance wouldn't be affected because of the reduced ticket. I just wanted to follow up. Thanks!""

What car can i hav 4 dead cheap insurance and whats the best insurance comp.... (im 18)?

I passed my test 6 months ago and still aint gotta car! i hav been looking at a honda civic 1.6 but im not sure what i can get insured on.. i know i can get insured on a 1.0L corsa but i want sumat a bit better (sumfin like a ferrari lol)?

Auto insurance question?

I am paying $166 monthly for 2 cars, full coverage, 6 month premium around 970. I'm not sure if that's cheap or expensive. What is the average most people pay for 2 cars? I'm curious. I have insurance through USAA.""

""Cheapest method for car insurance for 17 year old male, UK?""

hy guys, im 16 at the moment, and 17 in november and desperate to pass my driving test ASAP, which is the cheapest way to go about car insurance? ive heard vans insurence is cheaper? or going on parents insurance? im looking to get my own car, not to share my parents. please help me out guys! thanks x""

Can someone help me get a insurance quote ?

im 16 and my mom said that if i wanted to drive, i would have to buy my own insurance. but the thing is i cant find any sites that tell me how much i would have to pay as a starter , and then pay monthly. the car that i want to drive is my stepdads 2000 Bonneville. idk what else it is but it looks just like this. VvV http://www.autoworld.com/news/Pontiac/2000Bonneville.jpg i just want to know how much i would have to pay (:""

How much is car insurance?

on average how much is car insurance for a female aged 17?

How do I choose the right car insurance?

I just bought my first car and I need to find a good and cheap car insurance.

Will an insurance company insure our home if there is a unpermitted cottage?

I'm in the process of buying a foreclosure home (Saratoga,CA, can't transfer the insurance since it has already lapsed) that has a detached unpermitted cottage (2 bedrooms, kitchen, bathroom and living room total of 900 sq ft), the main home also has a unpermitted converted garage that is used as a in law quarter (separate entrance and full bathroom), it also has a unpermitted sun room too. I really love the home and tried looking for home insurance but it looks like no one will insure me. Is there anyway I can get insured for this property without having to lie about these unpermitted additions to the insurance company? Any advice would be appreciated and any suggestions which insurance company would insure me for a reasonable price. Thank you in advance.""

What's the best place to get cheap insurance on an imported Mitsubishi L300 Campervan?

What's the best place to get cheap insurance on an imported Mitsubishi L300 Campervan?

What should insurance depreciate previous damage to a car after accident?

My car was rear ended while parked in front of my house and insurance has declared it a total loss. We have been going back and forth on the value of the car and have finally gotten them to a value that we agree with but we disagree with how much they are taking off for previous damage to the car. There was a dent to the left fender and a scrape on the right back door, Farmers is saying it would cost $1100 to repair which is close to some of the estimates I have gotten from body shops. But they are not depreciating that value down for a used car. We were going through Safeco as well and they were taking 40% of the cost to make those repairs and deducting it from the value. Does anyone know what is standard practice for deducting previous damage to a value of a car? Thanks for your help!""

California after fires?

How long will it take for life in South California to return to normal? I mean quality of air, infrastructure, rebuilding homes. How was it in 2003? For example, for how long the ash will still be in the air?""

How do Doctors get paid by insurance company?

How do Doctors get paid by insurance company?

Do you have health insurance?

if so, how much is it per month? How old are you? what kind of deuctable do you have? feel free to answer also if you do not have insurance.

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-much-my-insurance-give-totaled-car-deeanna-wynkoop"

[rollinbrigittenv8]

5 Weeks in Las Palmas de Gran Canaria (A New Experiment)

Wandering Earl

On the wall is some graffiti that I can’t make much sense of. I think there are small round robots buzzing about, working on computers and talking on the phone. The table where I sit is long and white. There are four of us sitting here, laptops open, yet eight seats still remain empty. Inside this space it feels modern and industrial, yet welcoming enough, with wires hanging form the ceiling, a minimalist design and a front door that opens with the use of an app.

Outside plastered on the wall across the street is an advertisement for rum, next to a brown door that leads to a currently closed nightclub. In front of the wall and the door stands a tall green parking meter on the sidewalk.

How did I end up here in the Canary Islands? I hear a coffee machine rumble in the back of the room. There is a small yellow wooden duck on wheels only inches from my laptop, its black dot of an eye staring me down since I got here. It is the duck that won’t stop asking me how I ended up here. A middle-aged man with a worn out backpack, holding in his hand a salad in a plastic container, straight from the supermarket, just walked in to the room and sat down across from me.

I need to pee.

It reminds me of high school. Not the duck or the salad or the robots. The need to pee. Too often would I be at a high school party or a gathering at a friend’s house and despite the need to use the bathroom, I would just remain seated on a sofa or chair, for minutes, hours actually. My fear was that I would stand up, walk across the room and trip over my own two feet. And people would laugh. So I wouldn’t get up.

I’m more confident now of course. If I need to go, I go.

Sometimes the thought crosses my mind at the most random of moments, the thought that I’ve been traveling for 18 years. The funny thing is that no matter how long that thought stays in my head, a half a second or ten minutes, it always leaves my eyes ever so slightly covered in moisture. They are not tears though. It’s an impossibly thin layer of wetness that appears and then dries up almost immediately afterwards.

Is it a quick wash of these old dusty eyes? I like to believe it is the flash of a transparent curtain that marks yet another scene in this never-ending adventure.

Scene #4281: 5 Weeks in Las Palmas

Yes, this current scene takes place in the Canary Islands. I’m hunkered down in the town of Las Palmas on the island of Gran Canaria. We’ve rented a large apartment near the ocean, for five weeks, five whole weeks in Las Palmas, rented on Airbnb for 1000 Euros. A routine, a closet for my clothes, a renewed dedication to my push-up regimen, a sea breeze as soon as I walk out the door and two extremely chill pugs sitting on the street corner that I look forward to seeing every day.

Our apartment is far from being homey though. A couple of hallways and empty spaces too many, cold areas that seem to serve no purpose. But my stuff is scattered around nonetheless and this apartment is slowly becoming that place I return to and which I recognize. How odd indeed.

Only two small blocks from our pad on Calle Fernando Guanarteme is where you’ll find Playa de las Canteras. Sometimes I think I need the beach to be happy. It’s a golden black beach here, far from the white sands we dream of, yet it’s still an ideal location for an hour or two sprawled out on my cheap beach towel, Kindle in hand. Low constant waves, cool and lightly tinted turquoise water, topless sunbathers, flocks of surfers, views of the town and distant mountains whenever I sit up and look around.

Behind the beach sits the long boardwalk, the Paseo Las Canteras, that stretches perhaps two miles from the funky-looking Auditorio Alfredo Kraus in the south to Calle Prudencio Morales in the north. We walk much of this boardwalk every day. It’s alive with tourists, locals, cafes and bars, the occasional street performer, runners and groups of friends. I like the energy in the evening, the low lighting, the chatter, the boom of the waves.

The boardwalk is our real base. It’s the foundation of our stay here so far and unlikely to change over these five weeks in Las Palmas. There won’t be a day that we do not stroll upon it, at least once.

Fresh seafood, tapas of all sorts and home-cooked delights are found on every corner in Las Palmas, along the water, in the small, still lanes, on the main avenidas. A table on the boardwalk, a bottle of local wine, paella for two. 20 Euros. Potatoes arrugadas con mojo with grilled octopus, some grouper and a plate of fried cheese. 20 Euros. And satisfying. La Taperia, a cozy restaurant that we blindly entered on our first night, has proven to be a favorite. La Tosca Lonja around the corner served up Spanish seafood in divine form. That alluring Spanish flair helps of course, from the surrounding architecture to the bustling about of the dedicated waitstaff to the loud conversations that hum like meditative chants.

On Saturday we went for a long afternoon walk. One and a half hours each way. Through the commercial center of Las Palmas and along the other coast, the more residential and affluent section, with its streets loaded up on villas, private schools and language institutes. Twenty minutes later and things shifted. A bit darker, a bit more rundown, with people just sitting on the curb smoking their cigarettes and giving us a quick, grumpy ‘what’s your deal?’ kind of glance. And then another street crossed and we found ourselves in the most quaint and atmospheric neighborhood yet, and we cut straight through it along the overly pleasant pedestrian lane of Calle Perez Galdos, with its sense of art, active residents, attractive eateries and charming street lamps.

Las Palmas has it all.

After some time lost in conversation and smiles, we came upon an old, blue, mint condition palace. It’s now a music conservatory. We passed a small park with a colorful playground. And then a Burger King and the Catedral de Santa Ana before we landed on the steps of the Casa de Colon, right among the weathered, empty structures and narrow passageways of Vegueta.

We spent an hour wandering this museum, sprawled among four historic, connected Canarian homes, all while learning about Cristobal Colon, or Christopher Columbus. We also battled two giant parrots that fiercely guarded a courtyard leading towards the exit. Columbus visited the Canary Islands on several occasions. The first time in 1492 in order to stock up his fleet and fix a rudder on the Pinta before heading off towards the unknown. It appers he spent several weeks in Las Palmas too.

Columbus seemed unable to sit still. Each time he returned home from a voyage, he soon set off for yet another.

I also have trouble sitting still. Maybe that’s why I worked on cruise ships at one point. The constant journeys to New Worlds. New Worlds to me at least.

When I stay in one place, I do get anxious. It’s as if my body and mind still think we are constantly on the go. They get confused by the closet with my clothes inside, by the sight of the same bed for more than a few nights, by the lack of urgency to explore. As I attempt to sit quietly, they instead shout, “Do this, do that. We must do and see everything there is to do and see here by this Friday.”

Not this time. We will visit the neighboring island of Tenerife in due time. We will drive around Gran Canaria, climb mountains, visit villages and get lost, oh yes, in due time. We have plenty of that now. Time. And my body and mind will have to learn to live with it.

Last night on a stroll through the lively Parque de Santa Catalina I actually saw two cruise ships docked in port. As always, I was nostalgic for a few moments as I recalled my old teammates from around the world and those quiet times when I just stood on the open deck watching the flying fish and wondering what lay beyond the horizon.

But these two mighty vessels I saw yesterday, and all their passengers, would of course be gone by morning, without me. As would the flights and buses and trains of the world.

Now I shall stay put. An exchange of New Worlds for New Experiments.

And what better place to give this a shot than Las Palmas. Life is easy here. You can enjoy your surroundings within minutes of arrival and there really isn’t much to worry about. Food, people, atmosphere. Easy.

My eyes have watered again. 18 years. I feel hungry right now as I sit here at the Coworking Canary Islands location in Las Palmas. The one with the robots on the walls and the long white table. And the duck staring me down.

I start to think of volcanoes and ferries. But then I think of making a salad in my kitchen.

This is me trying to make sense of being a traveler in one place for some time.

I think I can handle five weeks in Las Palmas. I’m excited to find out.

Thoughts on slow travel? Have you been to the Canary Islands?

[sclarys]

Cupid Isn’t A Myth

I've always been a good shot. Like a hell of a good one.

My name's Ace and I'm the FBI's number one sniper. I'm that guy they call for every single case.

Abduction? Call Ace, he'll take out the perp.

The guy took hostages? Don't worry, Ace'll take the guy.

I love my job. I really, really do. There's nothing I love to do more than taking out scumbags with a single shot to the head. Though I sometimes wish the word HEADSHOT would appear in front of me like in video games. But sadly, life ain't a video game. It's way more boring.

I'm also what you call a high functioning sociopath. So, my part-time job isn't exactly a piece of cake for me.

Let's not delve into that for the moment.

Let me tell you about my life.

My dad was an FBI agent. He still is. When I was a kid, he would take me with him, and I would get to watch him interrogate suspects, bust killers, and drug dealers, and sometimes solve worldwide conspiracies. BORING! I used to sit in his office all day and mope around while he made calls and saved the world. I didn't really care about the world back then, and I still don't. Nah, what I liked about my dad's job, was the shooting range.

He used to take me there every time he had some free time on his hands, which wasn't often, but I appreciated the effort. You're probably thinking, what kind of father takes his son with him to a shooting range? The answer's My Dad. Welcome to my screwed up life. It's a hell of a ride and I love it.

Anyway, he would shoot targets in front of me, for hours on end. I was mesmerized by it. By the way the bullets are propelled in the air when you pull the trigger.

I knew every single detail of the process and the mechanism of a gun. I knew that pressing the trigger would cause a spring mechanism to hammer a metal firing pin into the back end of the cartridge, propelling the bullet from it forward. I knew because of the extreme pressure built up in the barrel, that the speed of a bullet could reach approximately 1000 feet per second. I knew where the main arteries and veins of the body were. I knew which ones to nick to instantly kill, or torture endlessly.

That's what makes me so good at my job.

I used to watch my dad closely. His stance, the way his arms tense while firing. I understood the importance of that later on when my gun flew back from my hand and hit me in the face when I was fourteen and was trying to shoot for the first time. I had underestimated the power of the weapon in my hand back then. Never again.

Fast-forward a decade. I'm now twenty-four years young. Fresh outta the Quantico Academy, and immediately promoted to the top of the pyramid. Apparently, my skills were famous.

One day, I was on the roof of a building. We were staking out the apartment of our suspect, a man who's pulled over 30 diamond heists and never was caught. I secretly admired him and his brilliance. He evaded us, and security every single time. It was a pure coincidence that we found him. While we were canvassing the area, an old lady told us that she saw a handsome young man walk past her and greet her. He matched the description we had gotten earlier in the week, and we got the old lady to sit with a sketch artist. Then, we ran the picture through facial recognition and got a hit. And now there we were, camped outside his apartment.

I was getting bored, obviously, because that's who I am. So I started admiring the view. My stakeout location was obviously the best, atop a very high profile building, overlooking New York City. I was looking at a particularly well decorated McDonalds, craving some McNuggets when something caught my eye. There was a guitar case. On the roof. What the hell.

My curiosity got the best of me, and I still curse myself for it, but I left my post without a second thought to look at the guitar closer. Maybe I could sell it and buy my chicken McNuggets. I was weird back then, even though it happened like a week ago. Don't judge.

No sound was coming from my earpiece, so obviously, no one needed me at the moment. I eagerly grabbed the guitar case, my imagination running wild with the possibilities of what may be inside. Penguins? A giant chocolate bar?

Nothing in the world could've prepared me for what was inside. It was probably the most beautiful sniper rifle I've ever seen. A CheyTac M200. I squealed so loud my partner from across the street looked at me funny.

I waved him off and took out my baby from its case. It was fully black, dismantled to fit in its creative-looking case, with three boxes full of cartridges just ready to be fired. The only weird thing was the pink, heart shaped sticker that was on the side of the barrel. I shrugged it off, then noticed a folded, pink note taped to the upper lid of the case.

'C, your first assignment is at 40.7829° N, 73.9654° W, on Saturday. The targets will cross each other at exactly 10:54 am. You'll be posted on the roof of the San Remo, on West 74th Street and West 75th Street, three blocks north of The Dakota. Target 1 will be wearing a pink tank top, and target 2 will be holding a silver briefcase. You'll receive a cash deposit of 500,000$ to this account 0500013M026.'

My eyes grew wide, and the gears in my head started turning. An assassin's contract? Here, on the roof? Oh god, what the hell did I stumble upon... Who else would discover an assassination plot before it occurred? I'm the most unlucky person in the world. Anyone would be relieved to save two people, but I was just discouraged by the prospect of more paperwork.

I sighed deeply. The coordinates were of Central Park, that's for sure. The San Remo is a luxurious building, so I didn't see how they could get past security to go to the roof. I looked at the bank account number closer, and I gasped. That... That was my French bank account. What the hell?! This was meant for me? Half a million dollars for ME?

HELL YES! I'm not paid nearly enough for the job I do with the FBI. Why not work for a little money on the side? It would be my opportunity to finally get the hell out of America and spend the rest of my days on a sunny beach in the Caribbean's.

Part of me was yelling 'no it's wrong!' but this part was immediately shut down by the words 'HALF A MILLION DOLLARS FOR ME WHAT WHAT.' Yes, my brain works that way. Let's say I have a... An ambiguous sense of right and wrong.

Fast-forward again to Saturday. Attaining the roof was pretty easy. They'll let you in anywhere when you wear an expensive suit and hold a briefcase.

I finished assembling my rifle around 10:30. Now, I just had to wait.

At around 10:50, I saw the girl in the pink tank top jogging along a path. I readied my rifle, ignoring my human side and high-fiving my dreaming-of-golden-sand-and-blue-sea-side.

At exactly 10:54:03, I saw the man with the silver briefcase getting closer. I put my eye in the scope, zooming in on the girl. In a few seconds, they will pass by one another, and their chests will be right in my range at the same time.

It was my last chance to back off, and turn this rifle over to the FBI. But it's always been a dream of mine to fire one like that. This was by far the deadliest sniper rifle ever made. I can't pass up this chance. Nor my chance at sunny afternoons on the beach in front of a cabin, surrounded by beautiful ladies.

When the opportunity presented itself, I fired, without hesitation. It was one of my steadiest and most precise shots. Pierced both of their chests at once. I did it.

My phone vibrated in my pocket, and I saw that the money was routed to my account. Half a million dollars appeared in my account, just like that.

I sighed in relief that this was finally over and looked over one last time at my targets.

They were shaking hands, and looking very much in love... and alive.

What the fucking hell.

I looked at my rifle suspiciously, then back at the new couple, who were holding hands and walking together now. Had I failed? But then, why was the money wired into my account? That meant that I did exactly what was expected of me.

That's when my phone rang. I cursed under my breath, and answered in a swift and calm "Ace."

"Good Job, Agent C. Mission Accomplished."

"Excuse me? Is this some kind of joke? Are the bullets blank or something? Is this an FBI test?"

"Oh far from it, my dear. Look at the targets. Don't they look happier now?"

I looked at them and cringed as they kissed. Yuck. "I suppose. What does that have to do with me?"

"You did that. By shooting them, you made them fall in love with each other. Welcome to the Legio De Caritate, agent Cupid."

That's how I became part of the Legion of Love. That's how I became one of the most powerful people on this planet, by accident. I still have no idea how that happened, though.

All I know is that I'm not getting my cabin on the beach anytime soon.