#it is a gamechanger to notice you are not a victim

[autisticbiologistmess]

I love little miau miaus as much as the next person, but damnnnnn these emotionally constipated men need to put on some pants

[enkisstories]

Well adjusted

- A DBH fanfic in my usual AU-

(Fall 2039, Last year’s revolution failed, Machine!Connor escaped destruction, deviated and is now pretending to be an RK900 at the DPD where Daniel works as a janitor. Between chapters 2 and 3 Daniel had suddenly moved up to police technician without me explaining how that happened. This fic remedies that.)

- Sims version coming later finished and turned out much better -

Tina Chen entered the cafeteria for a last-minute bagel and coffee before her shift. Having hoped to find it empty, the officer backed out again when she saw at least three co-workers sitting and chatting inside. She hadn’t come far when she heard the familiar voice of Detective Reed: “Come back here, Tina, and see something cool!”

Tina turned around again, expecting to see something that was funny in an inappropriate way. She was not prepared for Gavin closing in on the precinct’s android janitor, grabbing it and stomping his foot down hard on the device’s toes. The abused PL600 twitched, but instead of pulling its damaged foot off the ground it raised both its hands to the forehead and held it. On second glance Tina thought the thing was looking as if it was suffering from migraines.

“I was wrong!” Gavin cheered. “Androids DO feel pain! Only not where they got hit!”

That last part amused the man to no end and he could not stop laughing.

Meanwhile the janitor (everyone called it “Sardines” only, because it didn’t seem to have a given name) processed a multitude of error reports. Unlike human brains that made them feel the pain in the bodypart where it originated, a digital one gathered all the notifications in the same place, resulting in a severe headache for the android in question. Sardines had had to deal with constant headaches for weeks after his severed limbs had gotten re-attached. Connor claimed that “feeling” pain this way was a side-effect of deviance. He, too, found that he had trouble reading his own files clearly. In the RK’s case it wasn’t error reports getting replaced by physical pain, but him losing control over his major selling point, the crimescene re- and preconstruction app. More and more that program felt like a tool rather than an integral part of himself to Connor.

“Damn… damn you, detective!” Sardines hissed, all the while dismissing several prompts to forward the reports to CyberLife.

“I admit that is funny”, Tina agreed. “Do it again!”

Sardines glared at the officer, wishing Connor on both her and Reed.

“I think I’d rather show you a direct comparison to human pain!” he snapped.

The next thing Tina saw was Sardines pulling Gavin closer to himself. Taken by surprise the man found himself in a headlock, however, Sardines’ amateurishly repaired arms could not hold his victim tight enough. Gavin slipped away, grinned – and got tripped by the shaft of Sardines’ scrubber. The android raised the stick again, preparing to deliver a painful blow.

When Captain Fowler passed by the cafeteria next, accompanied by the new RK900, a full blown fistfight between the detective and the janitor had ensued. Each was getting cheered at by a small crowd of officers as well as a random handcuffed suspect whom officer Wilson had secured to the cupboard. The android’s supporters were the more numerous, Jeffrey noticed. Pretty much only Tina and the diehard android haters like Dave Allen preferred Reed over the kind PL600.

Gavin and Sardines were rolling on the floor now. Officers had to jump aside quickly, lest they’d get hit, too. Bob Lewis used the opportunity to kick Gavin, who was to believe it had been Sardines…

“Stop that! Will you… fucking… stop that, toaster?!”

“Wasn’t me! Now shut up and keep dying!”

“Don’t lie to me while I’m trying to beat you up!”

“I’m not lying! Not me!”

The captain savored the sight for a few second. “Why can’t you be integrated so well”, he then addressed Connor.

“That was sarcasm, Sir…?”

The RK didn’t receive an answer. Connor strongly suspected that it would have been “No” in this workplace, where putting each other to the gunpoint during arguments was considered proper conduct. But then you went and beat up one little detective and suddenly you were the office villain… that wasn’t fair! On the upside, the android who had beaten up Gavin Reed had been the RK800 prototype, whereas Connor was posing as his own successor. So at least this wasn’t on Connor’s cap anymore.

While Connor was pondering the unfairness of life in general and his own specifically, Tina explained the situation to Captain Fowler. The man seemed impressed by what he heard.

“Androids experiencing an equivalent of pain? That’s a gamechanger in police work!”

He turned to Sardines: “I want you to prepare a presentation on this. Take especially care to line out the differences, if any, in how it works for deviants compared to non-glitched androids!”

“Will… do… Sir…” the PL600 stammered.

“And wash your hands when you’re done with the detective”, Connor added. “You don’t know where it’s been.”

“Oh… right.” Only now Sardines realized that he was still grabbing Gavin. He let go of him and got up.

“Say, Reed, this keeps happening to you, huh? Getting trashed by our androids?” Dave gleefully commented while the human got up, too. Preferring Reed over Sardines didn’t mean that he’d liked either of them much, after all…

He knows, Daniel, the DPD’s canned sardine, thought. Fowler knows… or suspects… that I’m a deviant. Maybe even exactly which one. Or... what if he thinks I’m Simon?! I need to be careful!

But maybe Captain Fowler cared only about a smoothly running police department? In this case being useful instead of careful was the safer bet.

“I’ll start immediately on the lecture”, Daniel promised.

“But that was MY discovery!” Gavin protested between wiping his bloodied nose. “It should count for my promotion credit!”

As “Sardines” left the cafeteria, Connor stepped next to Gavin.

“Weren’t you the one who was afraid my predecessor would put him out of job, Mr. Reed?” he asked. “Don’t worry anymore! An RK android isn’t even needed for that. Looks like a common, outdated PL600 can achieve that feat.”

Gavin stared at the android. And then he stared some more. Eventually he uttered: “You’re right, tincan!”

Androids taking people’s jobs… but androids had to get programmed by humans in the first place. Adding one and one together that meant the future was in android training! Passing on experience, breaking the toasters in, teaching them the peculiarities of their workplace… Was that really so different from showing cadets the ropes? Whatever. It seemed to be the best path to get ahead and and thus Gavin Reed did something he’d never have thought possible: He ran after the PL600, shouting “Wait for me!”

Daniel turned around sharply.

“Why are you trailing after me? We aren’t fucking dating!”

“Ha! You’re one strange device. If your humans do not want you, you kill them, but if they want you, you yell at them.”

“I strongly contest that you are “my” human, detective.”

To almost everyone at the DPD, however, Sardines was exactly that: Gavin’s generous donation to the station, to avoid having to chip in for coffee or snacks ever again. Only Anderson and Connor were aware of the truth and they had their own reasons to keep it to themselves: Hank because he genuinely wanted to aid the deviants (and if he managed to re-socialize Daniel, there was nothing he wouldn’t be able to achieve), and Connor because if he exposed Daniel as a deviant, the PL600 in turn would expose him.

Daniel’s cover story came with the upside of officially being privately owned, not part of the DPD’s inventory. It came with the downside of being privately owned by Gavin Reed. The same Gavin Reed who now offered: “I’ll help you with the presentation!”

“Oh, right”, Daniel sighed. “The extra work you saddled me with. As if triple shifts day in and day out weren’t bad enough already.”

“Aw” Gavin went, “does the poor deviant have to work for a change?” He took a step closer and hissed: “Just say the word and you can join your kin at camp five instead!”

“I’m telling you that I don’t need help to set the presentation up!”

To Daniel’s surprise the detective nodded at this.

“Righto”, Gavin said. “But there’s subtleties in cop dynamics that you aren’t aware of. You need help to excel.”

“You’re scary when you’re making sense for once.”

Gavin reached up and slapped the android on its shoulder.

“Come on, let’s put their shiny new Connor to shame together! It’s the next best thing to getting revenge on the old one.”

Next to Hank Anderson Daniel was the only one in on the RK’s secret, he therefore knew it wasn’t just the “next best” thing. It was the real deal!

Daniel smiled. “I could warm up to that, detective.”

Connor watched the duo occupy an empty desk. He heard them discuss their project, then chat and eventually laugh at a joke one of them had made. His outwards expression didn’t change in any way, but secretly the android was crying blue murder:

First I catch deviance, then the two most annoying things in my life are teaming up. Figures.

[jacethebeltsculptor]

Mind VS Might: A Critical Review

Let me begin this article by saying: I am a huge fan of the Duel Decks series of products from Wizards of the Coast. I have bought every one since I started playing in M15 and I still keep my favourites constructed for casual Magic gameplay. With this in mind, today, I plan to offer a critical review of the latest offering in the Duel Decks line, and assess whether Mind vs Might accomplishes the goals of the Duel Decks line, or falls flat. If you are a casual or intermediate player looking into purchasing Mind vs Might, this article may be of interest to you. So, under the cut are my thoughts.

No review would be complete without outlining the criteria by which the object in question will be evaluated. For this purpose, I will outline the main purposes of the Duel Decks line. First and foremost, a Duel Deck should provide a balanced, fun, and box-playable gameplay experience that needs nothing more than the contents of the box to allow you to play Magic. Secondly, it should provide an outlet for needed or wanted reprints of cards with demand and usefulness outside the box itself, be it needed tournament staples or collectible cards with new artwork.  Duel Decks, Mind vs Might contains the following:

Two (2) 60 card decks, each featuring one foil card with alternate artwork, as well as several non-foil cards with new artwork.  Two (2) cardboard deckboxes featuring the set’s mythic rare artwork on each.  Two (2) spindown life counters, one for each deck.  Ten (10) creature tokens for cards in each deck.  One (1) How to Play insert.  One (1) Duel Decks insert, which contains decklists, as well as story tidbits about the featured characters and tips for playing each deck.  In addition, I’d like to note that the included deck boxes DO NOT hold sleeved cards. If you plan to sleeve up this product, you WILL have to purchase additional storage to accommodate. 

The Mind deck is a Blue/Red deck centered around taking one, epic turn, fueled by mechanics like Storm and Suspend to cast a flurry of spells on a single turn to create a game-winning advantage. It uses bounce spells and creatures like Young Pyromancer and Talrand, Sky Summoner to create blockers and stall until it can win. The Might deck is a Green/Red aggro deck that uses creature tokens, pump and burn spells, in conjunction with some light Warrior tribal synergy to overwhelm the opponent in the early game and flashes back spells like Beast Attack, Call of the Herd, and Roar of the Wurm to maintain a board presence in the late game.  Immediately, I noticed an issue. In my first game with the Mind deck, I noticed how high in complexity the deck was. Keeping track of Storm count is not that difficult on its own, but using techniques such as Splice onto Arcane, floating mana with Snaps, and complex spell sequencing all compound on one another. A less experienced player can easily lose their footing with this deck, or simply blunder through their turns, unsure of what exactly they’re supposed to be doing in order to win. This problem is made worse by the high density of 6-9 mana spells in the deck. Draws without Jhoira can feel like you have a grip full of uncastable cards, while draws with her, but not payoff, often leave the face of the deck as a Hill Giant with pretty artwork. The Might deck fares a little better- it’s understandable for beginners but strategically deep enough for veterans. It, too, however, falls victim to some horrifically awkward draws. The mana curve of the deck is high, ending in 7-mana Boldwyr Intimidator and Roar of the Wurm and starting with a pair of Skaargan Pit-Skulks. With twenty-five lands, I often wound up with openers that had four drops and three lands, or a smattering of two-mana spells and more lands than I could ever need. In addition, both decks are a bit light on mana fixing, with a near-even split in their lands despite Mind needing double-blue far more than double red, and Might needing a lot of green mana. Like, a lot.  How do these things affect gameplay? After all, even if there are issues with the deck’s construction, they can still play well together. I’m sad to say, however, this isn’t the case. Where gameplay in previous duel decks has been filled with back and forth, with control over the game shifting with opportunities for clever and gamechanging plays, Mind vs Might offers a fairly singular game dynamic: A race. Either Might will end the game before Mind can do anything significant, or the Mind deck will assemble the critical turn it needs to completely blow the game out and win. Of the twenty matches I have played with this deck, only five games felt like they significantly diverged from this narrative. The Mind deck’s critical turns tend to generate such an overwhelming advantage that the Might deck simply cannot come back from it, no matter how far behind the Mind deck was before. In almost every game played with these decks, in my experience, gameplay boiled down to a simple race, and as a result, the gameplay quickly became stale. Finally, the tokens provided for the storm deck, namely the Elemental tokens, Drake token, and especially Goblin tokens, proved woefully inadequate on their own for keeping track of the Mind deck’s creatures.  In terms of financial value and reprints, Mind vs Might fares a little better. The deck provides two foil, alternate-art legendary creatures (with absolutely fantastic artwork, I might add) that see some play in Commander, as well as an alternate-artwork copy of Desperate Ritual, which sees play in Modern Storm, and a reprint of Commander tribal staple, Coat of Arms. In addition, the Mind deck also contains reprints of Grapeshot and Empty the Warrens, which also see Modern play. However, while the cards included in the product do see limited play in other formats, the actual financial value of many of these cards is abysmal. The most expensive card is Coat of Arms, with the Duel Deck printing running at about 6.00$ CAD, and the runners up being the three copies of Rift Bolt at about 2.50$ CAD, followed by Beacon of Tomorrows at about 2.25$ CAD for the Duel Deck printing. Even the mythics weren’t more than a few dollars before their printing. Sure, the decks themselves would cost a lot more than 20-25% CAD to put together on your own, but the majority of those cards are total bulk, with little to no sale or trade value. As a result, you’re getting very little that you’re likely to want, or need, if you ever decide to break down the decks. If you want to buy this deck for the singles it contains, don’t. You’re better off buying the cards you want individually and spending the other 10$ elsewhere.  FINAL CONCLUSION

Duel Decks: Mind Vs Might is a disappointing offering. The gameplay is deeply flawed, there is little financial value, and only marginal value for collectors. The bulk accounts for the majority of the product’s worth, and there is little in the way of truly meaningful reprints in this deck. Unless you are a collector or a Duel Decks enthusiast, I would advise you to spend your 25$ on another offering in the Duel Decks series, or on adding singles to your existing decks. I am of the firm opinion that Mind vs Might IS NOT a worthwhile use of your money- I certainly don’t feel it was worth mine. As always, friends and planeswalkers, have a fantastic day, and please leave your thoughts! (Final disclaimer: Fun is subjective. If you enjoy these decks and the gameplay experience they present, power to you! I’m not here to shit all over your opinions. This is meant as nothing more than my own analysis and judgment, meant to offer advice to somebody who is undecided. In the end, whether or not the product is truly worth it is up to you.)