#it felt strong and angry and blunt. i was irrationally afraid of killing my friend by accident. i thought of how it felt for the first
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#sometimes i don't listen to music for weeks and ive realised the reason - sometimes it's more comfortable to live in a blur#i dont know what i want to do i dont know what i will mean! everything was clear and now i'm thinking of how i will miss you i miss you#i already missed you. something about an LLM good enough to be the descendent of us and then something less clear. something about the free#energy principle something about a 64 channel EEG something about neural manifolds something about how i felt when the trees#looked like astrocytes something about when i traced psi and phi on the back of my hands to calm down. something about asking the chemist#for help. the intersection is my baby that i've betrayed by inaction. what do you want to do? be specific. i'm scheduled to break up#with my girlfriend tomorrow and i don't quite know if i have reason enough to go through with it. the first time i shot a compound bow#it felt strong and angry and blunt. i was irrationally afraid of killing my friend by accident. i thought of how it felt for the first#man to shoot a gun to point it at another and what compelled us to turn this into a daily tradition. it must have felt strong and horrible.
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