#is this radioapple/hana??

[vroomian]

for the hazbin hana au, i think none of the seraphim (sera, emily, lucifer) have abo gender. that's a strictly mortal thing. charlie inherited her secondary gender (alpha) from Lilith (the first omega) but Lucifer doesn't have one! it makes him verrrry creepy to be around for normal sinners!

but not for hana! who's used to the way abo works by now, but still finds it both silly and strange. she actually finds being around lucifer a nice reprieve from abo nonsense. lucifer is like i don't know what is happening????? help????

[vroomian]

as the romans do, hana/radioapple, first meeting with lucifer

Lucifer was sitting in the bar/reception area, indulging in peaceful silence with Musk sitting behind the bar staring off into the distance. Keke was beside him, staring n the same direction. Must be a cat thing.

The door opened. Husk’s gaze snapped to it with a muffled mrrp. Lucifer stifled a chuckle, because he had manners, Alastor. He glances over to the door finding – a stranger? With a blink, he straightened up. In the month since he’s taken up residence there’d been no new clients at all.

This new sinner was on the shorter side, skin pale as Lucifer’s own, her face set in an impassive mask. Her eyes were black pits like a cannibal’s but there were small, pure white pupils that revealed that wasn’t this sinner’s damming vice. Other than her eyes and coloring she was the most human looking sinner Lucifer had ever seen.

The one mark of strangeness was the twin pair of branches that curled out of her head like horns. They were the same void black as her eyes, but on them was a riot of flowers, – all of them in grey scale, Lucifer realized.

He watched one bud sprout, bloom, fade, and wither as if in fast forward. Fascinating.

“Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel. Can I help you?” Musk drawled, sounding as if there was nothing he’d like less.

“Delivery for the radio demon,” The woman said. Her voice was surprisingly deep and raspy.

Husk made a face. “Gotcha.” He tapped the radio on the bar. “Delivery for you, boss.”

The shadows in the room flickered. Oh, great. This asshole. The radio demon in his full red glory sprang into existence in the middle of the lobby like Athena from the forehead of Zeus. He adjusted the sleeves of his tacky, tattered coat despite the fact they were perfect as always. Asshole.

“Now, Husker, what’s this about a delivery? I don’t recall ordering anything, but perhaps Rosie sent –” Alastor stopped dead in the middle of the room, staring at the woman.

Lucifer’s eyebrows raised. That was the most surprised he’d ever seen the Radio Demon. His smile actually faded a bit.

Alastor cleared his throat, straightened his already immaculate jacket again, and crossed over to meet the woman. She seemed content to let him loom over her, her entire body relaxed and loose in a way Lucifer had only seen Nifty be. The omega was intimidating.

Alastor’s hands were clasped behind him, so Lucifer got a full view of the almost nervous twist to them. “Hana, darling. What brings you here? I wasn’t expecting you to be back for another fortnight at least.”

The sinner – Hana – hummed under he breath. “I caught a broadcast and came back. You didn’t invite me to the party.”

The party? Did she mean the Extermination?

Alastor’s back tensed. “Vox remains a voyeuristic fly in the eye of the public.”

“True. But I wouldn’t have to listen for news about you if you just told me yourself,” Hana tapped his chest with her knuckles, gentle as anything. Amazingly, her hands stayed attached to her body.

Something like dread was starting to curl up in Lucifer’s chest. The way Alastor’s ears relaxed when Hana touched him, the easy way the stood together, the atmosphere as if they were the only two in the world – it was painting a picture that Lucifer couldn’t quite focus on.

There was no way. Not Alastor. Omega he might be but he was far, far too dangerous for any Alpha, no matter how strong they thought themselves.

It was a stupid idea.

Lucifer found himself pushing away from the bar, walking over to them. “Hey, bellhop. You going to introduce us to your friend?”

Alastor’s ears flicked, as if startled.

Lucifer’s stomach clenched. Alastor was never startled. He kept his ears on a swivel, especially around Lucifer. Deer thing. Or a paranoid overlord thing. Maybe some fun and terrible mix of the two! They were in hell after all.

The Radio Demon turned neatly on his heel, his normal smile in place. “Why, didn’t your mother teach you not to interrupt private conversations?”

“Hm. NOPE. I don’t have one of those,” Lucifer drawled out. Alastor’s eyes were flint and steel, striking up a blaze inside of Lucifer’s gut. “It’s a stupid human thing.”

“Oh my! Such disrespect for your own wife, and the mother of your child. Tsk, tsk, what would Charlie say?”

Bitch. Lucifer knew plenty about mothers and children! Not that Lucifer could say anything, or even show Alastor the stretch marks as proof of Lucifer’s own labor of love. “Don’t bring Charlie up to me, you absolute –”

“Al,” Hana said. Breaking into the now familiar cadence of a proper fight. “Introduce me.”

Alastor’s hackles immediately went down, his entire face softening into something foreign. It left Lucifer adrift, like a dancer whose partner vanish mid step.

“My apologies, darling. Where are my manners these days!” Alastor gave a deeply theatrical bow to Lucifer. “Hana, may I introduce our fearless, feckless leader and progenitor of my business partner, his majesty, Lucifer Morningstar. Sire, this is Hana. She is a dear friend, a trusted ally,” He took a deep breath, and his smile grew hard, staring at Lucifer as if daring him to say something. “And my mate. My Alpha.”

Absolute silence.

Something behind the bar shattered, but Lucifer was too frozen to look. The words didn’t register for a long moment. He stared at Hana. She was – Alastor’s alpha? What the fuck? Lucifer knew he didn’t truly understand how humanity’s secondary genders worked, but how could anyone manage to snag an omega as independent and dangerous as Alastor?

It was a good thing Lucifer didn’t really need to breath. All the oxygen seemed to be sucked out of the room. He could feel his forehead itch, horns threatening to break through skin.

The sinner didn’t seem surprised or even intimidated. Her hands stayed in her pockets. “Hey.”

“A pleasure,” Lucifer lied.

“Wait, wait one fucking second – Boss, was this the reason you were gone for seven years?” Musk asked, incredulous. “You were involved in a hunt?”

“Ah, that. Well –” Alastor paused. “Hm. I suppose it could be thought of that way. I certainly felt pursued.”

“Yeah,” Hana said.

Lucifer didn’t miss the way Alastor’s ears flicker towards the sound of her voice, attention firmly on his – his mate. Fuck. Lucifer felt his nails bite into his hands. The pain was grounding.

Husk scoffed. “A whole seven years for a hunt, though?”

“Well, of course, Husker! it’s a matter of principle! My mother didn’t raise me to settle. Seven years of hunting is the bare minimum for someone such as I.”

“You’re a slippery fuck,” Hana said, her voice still bland and cold. Standing next to Alastor, she seemed even more drab and lifeless. Seriously, how was this Alastor’s mate?

Alastor gave that polite fake laugh, pleased as punch. “I am a delight. Now my dear, why on earth have you come to the hotel? I have it on good authority you were out of the city on business.”

Hana gave him a very dry look. “Maybe it’s because I had to hear about my mate taking on the first man and leader of the exorcists from 666 news. Business could wait.”

“Ah. Yes, that.” Alastor cleared his throat, and actually looked a little embarrassed. Lucifer wanted to tear out his own eyes. “As you can see, I’m perfectly fine!”

“You are,” Hana said, voice the slightest bit warmer, and her eyes giving Alastor the slow once over.

A flush rose in Alastor’s cheeks. He looked –

“So!” Lucifer broke in, his stomach in knots. How the fuck did Alastor of all people have a mate? Someone that worried about his safety, gave up business for him, complimented him, flirted, clearly cared? “You said you had a delivery?”

Alastor cleared his throat. “Quite right, sire!”

Hana’s dark eyes wandered slowly from Alastor to Lucifer, and it was like being crushed under the full pressure of the sea. Lucifer could physically feel the sinner’s attention. His wings puffed up in their pocket dimension. His forehead ached.

Oh. This sinner was powerful. Not an overlord, or Lucifer would’ve definitely remembered her. Was she new? But what new sinner felt like this?

“You’re the devil?” the sinner asked.

Lucifer bared his teeth it what could generously be described as a smile. “I am. Lucifer Morningstar, King of Hell. As the bellhop said.”

That netted him a single slow blink. That strange sense of pressure intensified, and Lucifer had the unpleasant feeling of being a bug under a magnifying glass. Seriously, what the fuck was up with this sinner and why didn’t Lucifer know who she was?

Abruptly as it came, the attention faded, leaving just a sinner standing there. No indication of power. Not even a hint of danger. that trick, more than anything, made Lucifer’s blood run cold.

“Huh. Shorter than I thought,” was all the sinner said.

Asshole. She had barely six inches on him!

Before Lucifer could incinerate the sinner for her impudence, Alastor let out a tiny snicker.

“Isn’t he just?” Alastor reached over and scuffed a hand through Lucifer’s hair. It was so unexpected Lucifer forgot his anger. “Now, what did you bring me, darling?”

She gestured, and a large package poofed to existence. It reached Hana’s middle, and it was wrapped in butcher paper, revealing it to be – oh, ew. Was that a leg? Did Alastor’s mate bring him an actual leg?

“Do I want to know who’s that is?” Lucifer asked, already annoyed. Fucking sinners. “It better not bring trouble for the hotel. Charlie has enough on her plate.”

Alastor practically lit up like the marquee outside, red eyes glittering. “My dearest, you are a blessing! Did Rosie source it for you?”

“Nah. It’s home grown.”

What?

Alastor stilled, and Lucifer watched the red rise in his cheeks with a sense of something sinking inside of his chest. Red suited Alastor, though Lucifer would die rather than admit it. It was so easy to forget the man’s designation until the light of the lobby, soft and diffused, hit his long eyelashes and delicate cheekbones just right.

“Hana, my dear, you certainly didn’t have to –”

Hana tapped him on the chest again, closed fist and gentle. Alastor abruptly cut off. He looked down and captured the hand in his own. The white of the sinner’s hand contrasted beautiful with Alastor’s own black and red. Lucifer’s own traitorous hands twitched for his sketchbook.

“I am your alpha. You need, I provide.” She said. “Standard rates still apply.”

Alastor laughed. “You feed me, I feed you?”

“It’s only fair.”

“Just so,” Alastor said softly.

It had the ring of an old conversation, full of meaning that Lucifer wasn’t privy too. Like listening to himself and Lily, one hundred years ago. When There was a certain weight to history between two people, they could create a mess of language and inn jokes all their own.

Why did Alastor get to have that? He was a sinner of the worst type. And yet this awful cannibal, that egotistical waste of hellish air got to have a partner that not only accepted his strangeness but loved it?

If there was a proof that Lucifer’s parent was an uncaring one, it was here in this moment. He couldn’t help the way that his smile fixed on his face, fake and fully ugly.

[vroomian]

The funniest part of abo Hana/radioapple is that it implies that alastor has a specific type in partners. Tiny, pale, extremely powerful, arrogant, deeply depressed, willing to spoil their loved ones.