#is called EVILNESS EVIL in one of the russian translations

[danadiadea]

When I was 10 my dad bought me a children's book, with an unpleasant "mean teacher" character named Evilness Evil in it, and now I am here obsessively drawing him and writing about him and making life desicions based on the way I perceive him and also actively imagining him reading and being held to help me sleep

[winterarmyy]

Never Lie To Me

A series of random Bucky Drabbles that I can't let go but don't have the brain to make the whole complete plot of.

Summary: In which Y/N's sinful thoughts towards the Asset is reciprocated.

Pairing: winter soldier!bucky x hydra agent!female!reader

Words: 3.4k++

Warnings: 18+ content, no minors allowed, nsfw, purely smut and lack of plot, honestly. messy writing and lack of dialogue, sorry for that. Others may include probably incorrect russian due to the use of google translate, marking kink (if you squint), metal hand kink, finger-fucking, clit spanking, unprotected sex, creampie, soldat doesn't talk much, i figured he is more reserved but that doesn't mean his actions are (*wink wink*) he is kinda rough but the reader highkey loves it, just bunch of horny pent-up mfs getting some action for once, y'know.

Inspiration: "Cause I can see you waiting down the hall for me and I can see you up against the wall with me." – I Can See You (From The Vault) by Taylor Swift.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

Y/N didn't understand why was she sent to this field mission. There were literally dozens of others that were much suitable to do it and yet they chose her of all people? Considering her much leisure job for the past months, which basically just to guard a lab, Hydra seemed to forgot that her body have been lack of combat practice.

She hated this. This mission. This organization. All of it.

Y/N was one of those kids that Hydra stole from the orphanages for their Phantom program; it is where they train, or accurately brainwash, the kids into highly skilled assassin. And she was one of the top 5 out of the program in her batch.

But after a certain incident in one of the mission in Peru, she was temporarily relocated to Siberia to, as they say, "recover" before they can assign get into another mission. There, she was given a much lenient task, which was to guard the lab where the Winter Soldiers were created.

Those few months was both heaven and hell for her; heaven was that she didn't need to be soaked in the blood of the innocent lives and hell was that she had to be a bystander to the cruelty of the dehumanizing process of the Winter Soldier program.

Sure, everything Hydra does to its "followers" are, by nature, imbrute. I mean, she was trained like a dog since she was but a child, but this. This was just another level of evil. Such vile and merciless thing to do to another human being. The muzzles that Hydra shoved in their mouth doesn't really help to reduce the excruciating noises that they made.

Though, while she was physically forced to witness the atrociousness, there was one constant thing that kept her mind off from it all.

They call him the Asset. In fact he was the first one. But she'd rather think of him simply as a man sleeping in a cryo chamber.

Y/N had heard of this "monster", the rumours were terrible as they come and go, but she find it hard to believe that when the soldat had such a calm and kind expression on his face, even if his features were frozen in ice. That was her first impression of him; then day by day, and what felt like ages, she watched him.

Her curiosity got the best of her when she started to think of scenarios and possibilities that the man had quickly became her escape from the horrid reality around her.

Though she spend most of her time trying not to feel it, but the other times, well... the thoughts went a little wild. At one point, they got too personal even for her own mind to comprehend.

After a month of reporting at the new post, she heard the whispers of "thawing the asset" from other agents and scientists around the lab. And surely enough, one of those day, the soldat was brought back from his slumber.

It didn't cross her mind before, of what color laid behind those closed lids. But when she saw his eyes for the first time, she was in complete awe. They were blue as the vast ocean she once jet-skied over; but they were as cold like when she stepped foot at this snow covered facility.

The contrast of his dark hair and tanned skin only makes his bright eyes to become the most prominent feature on his face. And Y/N just couldn't tear her gaze away, especially when the Hydra agent that supposed to retrieve him was making such a big fuss over how slow the soldat was reacting to their commands.

What do they expect? He was literally frozen for lord knows how long just a few seconds ago. Everything must be dissociating for him. So of course, the man's mind and body needs time to adjust.

The soldat abruptly fell on his knees after exiting the chamber, causing one of the guards to strike a kick across his face, "вставай, паршивая собака! (Get up, you lousy dog!)"

And that was it, Y/N had enough of it, "Hey!" she shouted as her stomped towards the guards. The duo quickly stood straight and showed their respect to her; knowing that those who graduated from Phantom program has higher ranking than them.

The moment Y/N found her footing in front of him, the palm of her hand landed harshly across his face, "Do you realized what you just did?" She asked as the taller regained to his prior composure.

"That man!" She pointed at the soldat who was obediently sitting on the floor, "Is Hydra's most prized asset. He alone is worth thousands of you useless scumbags. And you had the audacity to lay your hands on him?!" She roared and the lab fell into silent.

The two guards can only bite on their own tongue knowing what she said was true. The soldat was in fact the Hydra's precious weapon, as for now that he was the only one who successfully weilded the super soldier serum in his veins.

Y/N walked around and stood in front of the soldat, "Are you hurt, soldat?" she asked as her gaze fell on him. His head was hanging low as he bored his empty eyes into the shine of Y/N's black boots; he shook his head and replied, "No, ma'am"

She knew he was lying, especially when she saw the drips of blood on his pants, "Look at me." She ordered in which the soldat complied. And there it was, the source of the mess, the red cut on the corner of his lips. Her frown only deepened when the bruises were slowly forming on his cheek bones.

Y/N crouched to his level, as her hand reaching for his cheeks. His body halted and stiffened when she approached, but only to be surprised by the soft carress of her fingers on his face, "If you're not injured, then what's this?" She whispered lowly; a tone where just the two of them can hear.

The soldat's empty eyes almost melt in hers; he never saw her before, who is she? Why was there so much kindness in her eyes? And why was she holding him so gently?

He let her careful thumb wiped the blood from his chin before whispered again, "Never lie to me, soldat. Do you understand?"  The soldat obediently nodded as a spiral of indescribable emotions stirred within him. His eyes lingered at the way her lips formed into a soft smile, "Good." She praised.

Since then, the soldat's gaze had remain on her almost all the time. From the moment she threatened the two guards, to the time she looked away from the tortured candidates of the Winter Soldier program, to this very second as she undresses every part of her suit.

Though the mission was a success however, their plane was utterly wrecked by an unforeseen mini gun. So they were forced to walk through the snow storm and find shelter at one of Hydra's safe house.

It was not rare for the soldat to be paired with other agents on a mission but never with a woman. Much less the pretty little bunny that he had been obsessing over. Ever since that incident, the soldat often think of her. And he really tried too keep everything professional but something within him changed lately.

One particularly distinct moment that he experienced that made it clear to him; it was when he was waiting in the hall for his handlers to drag him around the facilities, and she happen to walk towards him from the opposite side. And when he brushed pass her, he noticed how his hands was itching to grab her by the neck and push her up against the wall.

As if there was this strong urge to claim her, mark her, fuck her. That was when he realized. The soldat wanted her. He wanted ruin her for everyone else. He wanted her to be his. But, he knew they keep watchful eyes on him. On both of them. And he can't risk that.

But now that she was standing right in front of him, in her underwear no less, how was he supposed to control himself?

Y/N turned her attention towards the soldat, he stood absolutely still that she almost thought he was literally frozen, "Why are you not stripping? Even with that super soldier serum in you, I doubt that you don't feel cold from those snow-soaked clothes."

Maybe it was the dim-lit room, but she swore that the soldat eyes darkened when she walk towards him. Especially when his eyes ranked the way her wet undergarments stick onto her skin.

How many times did she fantasize about the way he was looking at her. How many times did she made herself cum from the thoughts on grinding her cunt into his metal fingers.

Too many to count.

Especially when, in her head, she could see him in his suit with his knives, she could see him throwing his black mask on the floor, she could see him bending her over to his will, she could see him make her want him, crave him, need him.

And whenever their eyes met, she often think of the what-ifs between them. Like, what would he do if she went to touch him now? What would he do if Hydra never found them out? What would he do if they never made a sound?

What would he think if she made him her own personal addiction? Then will he entertain her fantasies by making her his own secret mission?

"Remember what I told you, soldat?" She asked as her hands reached for his mask.

Without hesitation, the soldat replied, "Never lie to you." as his face was bare for her to see.

Y/N took a step forward, so close that he could almost feel her skin on him, "Now tell me, what do you want?" Her eyes found his diluted ones as he lifted his gaze from her cleavage to meet hers.

His cock was rather truthful even from the beginning; now more than before when it twitched painfully in the confinement of his pants. The soldat hissed to the feel of it before he confessed, "I want you."

Y/N couldn't help but to smile, "Then, have me, soldat."

That was all he needed to hear. Her permission to have her, to own her. Then, very next second, he had her body pinned firmly against the wall, his lips on her soft ones, his wet tongue exploring in her mouth.

The soldat had his metal hand gripping the back of her neck, not wanting that pretty head of hers to hit the wall; while the other hand unabashedly teared the bra off from her body.

Breaking the kiss, the soldat's lustful gaze watched how her breasts became bare for him. So pretty and perky. His cock twitched madly as if it was ordering him to touch them, suck on them. And he did just that.

The soldat took her right nipple into his hot mouth while his free hand pawed on the other. Y/N moaned lewdly at roughness of his hand and mouth. When she threw her head back, that was when she saw it. At the corner of the room, she noticed a CCTV camera directly situated towards their direction

She grabbed a handful of his long hair, and lightly tugged him back but he refused to stop sucking on her. Y/N huffed when she whispered, "They're watching us."

That was when the soldat quickly released her from his mouth and quickly hovered his huge body over her, he growled possessively as his quick eyes scanned for all the nearby camera.

Y/N chuckled amusingly at his reaction, "Do you not like it when they watch us?" She teased. The soldat growled again as he pulled her closer, her nipples perked even more now that they touched the cold fabric of his clothes, "Mine. Mine alone." He declared.

Y/N looked up at him with a pair of seductive eyes, "Then, what are you going to do about it?" She taunted. The soldat swiftly pulled his knives out from his thigh strap and threw it directly at the lens of each camera in the room. Now no one would have a chance witness her divine body, or see what her face looks like when he make her cum.

There weren't much of intelligible words that came out of his mouth after that, besides the grumble noises of the word "mine".

The soldat latched her mouth onto her skin, particulary around her neck, collarbone and the valley of her breast. He kissed and licked and sucked to leave his mark on her as his metal hand dug into her hips.

Meanwhile, the flesh of his right hand slide right into her panties. He fingers trailed the outer slit of her cunt; as if he was purposely teasing her, "Зайка (bunny)" he groaned against her neck when he felt how wet she was. She squirmed needily under his hand, when his middle finger poked her entrance while his thumb grazed across her clit.

"So wet, all for me?" He purred as his finger slowly dug into her hole. Y/N whined and grabbed his wrist before he could go any further, "Want your metal fingers, soldat." she slurred deliriously; already drunk with his touches.

It took all his might to not fuck her right there and then when she let him have her. The soldat wanted to treat her gently, prepare her sweetly. Now that she had confessed such sinful desire, something in him just snapped.

He pulled his hand out, and effortlessly ripped her panties from her body before lifting one of her legs up, pushing her thighs towards her body. She yelped at the sudden roughness, embarrassment crept across her spine when the soldat licked his lips at the sight of her cunt, wide open for him.

"Want my metal fingers huh,  Зайка (bunny)?" He trailed his metal fingers along her wet hole, "You got it." He abruptly shoved two of his digits into her, causing her to let out a loud gasp at the sudden intrusion.

The soldat didn't give her time to adjust, he simply pulled his fingers out to the very tip and thrust it back into her. And he does it again, and again and again. Until the pain turn into sheer pleasure.

When her eyes rolled back and shut close, the soldat growled disapprovingly, "No. Don't close your eyes. Look. Look down. Watch how your wet little hole take my metal fingers. That's it. Look at you. Fuck. Look. At. You." His pace didn't lose its rhythm when he fucked his fingers hard and fast; he curled them just right every time he hit that deep spot inside her.

His metal fingers was better that she had ever imagine, and the sight that she was looking at was so lewd that she was already so overstimulated from it, then when his thumb circled her clit, she thought she was seeing actual stars.

Streams of fluid was squelching everytime he shoved his fingers knuckles deep into her, that it trickled down his hand. It was so messy and the soldat loves it. He want her to be this messy all the time. He wanted to clean her up with his tongue. Lick every drip of her sweet fluid, swollow it like he was thristy and she was water.

At the this point, he would be willing to stay on his knees if it means that he get to have her cunt on his mouth always.

The soldat growled at the way she moaned so shamelessly at how harsh his fingers was violating her sweet pussy. He kept on rubbing on her clit and watched her body shuddered when he slap on it. Seeing her reaction, he continued to spank her clit and he fucked her harder; one, two, three, four, until she cried out a long moan and her pussy gushed with her creamy cum.

And seeing how her body trembled, her cream dripping out onto his hand, the soldat almost combust in his pants. Though apart of him wanted to feel her sweaty skin on his own, another just wanted to feel her warm pussy.

So, instead of wasting more of his time undressing himself, the soldat hurriedly unzipped his pants to release his aching cock out. He pulled his finger out and licked her cum clean while his other hand lazily pumped his leaking length, "Taste so good, Зайка (bunny). Bet you feel good too."

Y/N whined at his action, he looked so hot and bothered. And something about him fully clothed while pumping his needy cock for her; it just drives her to near feral. She let out an exasperated gasp when the soldat maneuvered her legs to cling around his waist, while his hand gripped on her hips. Her voice then stuck on her throat when he thrust his cock deep inside in one stroke.

His size was stretching her out so much that it burned, a good type of burn; in fact, the best type. The soldat on the other hand almost burst his cum the moment he entered her. She felt so good. Better that his rough hands when he jerked off to the though of her. But he was determined to make her cum on his dick before he get his own high.

So without letting her adjust to his size, he slowly pulled out and harshly slammed right back into her; fuck does it feel so good. And her mewling so needily for him does not help the situation at all. He repeated the same thing over and over until he managed to suck up his need to cum, then fasten his pace. And the sound of her wetness rubbing against his cock when he pounded into her was so damned and sinful, that never wanted to forget.

Her back repeatedly hit the wall from the force of his thrust that she needed to hold on his shoulders for support. His pace was fast and deep, almost erratic. Her moans broken when she felt the tip of her cock ramming at her womb, her walls clenching in delight to welcome such huge and hot length inside her. Every stroke was perfect and if she had no self-control she would be cumming each time the soldat forced his cock into her.

His hips slapped against her and she eagerly followed his every thrust, desperate to meet his skin as much as he was for her. And when she looked up to him, the soldat was looking directly into her. His ocean blues dove into her soul as his grunts tangled with her cries.

His breathing stuttered and his pace flatter. She could tell he was getting close. But, the soldat refused to; not until she cum first.

In and out. In and out. His pace became brutally delicious. Her nerves were stretching so good that her toes curled and that was when she felt the coil forming. Short needy pants left her lips, each one was a sign that she was getting closer to ecstacy, "I'm cumming, soldat. Please,, don't stop."

The soldat groaned, "Don't hold back." He pounded into her impossibly harder; and the delicious drag of his cock continued to punish her into pure ecstasy, forcing her cum to leak out and lather around his throbbing length, "That’s it, Cum for me, Зайка (bunny). Cum for your soldat,, ahh fuck so tight, i'm cumming too, ahh." The soldat chased his own release as continued to thrust inside her clenching hole.

"Fuckkkk i'm cumming inside you, Зайка (bunny). Will mark you mine with my cum. Ahhh ahhh fuckk", the soldat moaned to the addictive feel of her cunt milking him, and soon after when it hits him, his cock throbbed wildly as his cream leaked from the tip, endlessly filling her womb full with his warm cum.

Y/N whined to the amount of warm fluid spreading inside her. And when she thought his slowed thrust was a sign of an end, she couldn't be wrong. The soldat slowly pulled his cock out to the very tip, just pound it back into her. He groaned at the sight of his creamy cum spilling out, circling where his cock was stuffing her. Then he does it again, and again.

Until she started to moan for him, "hmmm,, s-soldat?" She hoped that he would explain himself.

His dark eyes only glint with lust and greed when a small smiled curved on his lips, "Oh, Зайка (bunny), I'm not done with you until I mark every part of you as mine."

End.

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: This scene has been played out in my head the whole day when Speak Now (TV) came out. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this short read! Drop some thought behind for me would you?

[spookypete-94]

Heels John PricexFem!reader

Thought for a long time about who I would rather write about in this scenario. The big intimidating but loving Ghost, or our rather caring and gentle man of a Captain. The more I thought about it, the more John fit into this better. So! I present to you a short story called Heels (inspired by a TikTok I saw but can no longer find) that lives in my brain rent free.

Trigger warning for language, implied smut at the end.

Working alongside the TF141 is generally anything but boring. This time however, it is radically outside your normal specialties of defensive tactics. Commonly, your multilingual self worked with the front lines. Either making peace or declaring war with the faces of many enemies in their native tongue. Always willing to follow up with your promise of violence with your knowledge of weaponry.

You should have known something was off by the way Laswell pronounced herself half way in front of your make shift office in the hotel you were staying in, blocking herself with the other half of the doorway to what you would consider an evil plan trick. Using the entry way as a blockade hiding the tight black dress in a bag in her other hand.

"I need you to do me a favor." By her tone you could tell she was addressing something, rather delicately but still trying to be direct. Still acting strange none the less.

"A favor? Or is this an order?" Your tone not believing her, looking up at her through your loose hair and up past your eyebrows over the stack of papers you had finished for her.

She sighed seeing the direction this was going sensing your attitude.

"It's a mission, one I've already assigned you to."

"I'm finishing the last report for you and now you're sending me on another mission? What the fuck, Laswell?" You asked confused sitting back in your chair.

"You see," she said beating around the bush, "the dress doesn't fit me so I can't do it myself." Side stepping from the door frame and exposing the dress bag that was in her hand.

A long pregnant pause filled your office as your heated gaze glanced back at her, and back to dress bag.

"What entirety of a shit show have you signed me up for??" Your question booming out of your office and spilling into the hallway where Price stood leaning. He was watching the interaction of you and Laswell, trying to keep his snicker to himself. Laswell seeing this out of the corner of her eye stepped in and shut your office door hoping to save her hide from the embarrassment.

Behind close doors she explained that you were needed for an undercover mission at a gathering. One that you needed to drop off a mic that would allow them to get information on a weapons runner, however with this being a Russian party, they felt they would be going in blind.

"I'm your translator, not your spy. This is espionage, isn't that more your forte?"

"Please, I need your help and already told John we would help his team. You're the only one that can bullshit your way through this."

A loud scoff left you as you snagged the dress from her hand. Pulling the bag apart you could see the sparkly black dress. As much as you didn't want to admit it, your heart skipped a beat at something so feminine, fingers running against the fabric catching on the stones periodically.

"It's the only dress we have on base... And it's your size."

"You fucking owe me."

Laswell zipped up the back of the dress leaving you to smooth out the material trying to make it longer on your skin.

"Looks nice."

"Mm." Was the only thing your brain could come up with.

Finding some heels you kept with your pant suit you wore with, you slipped those on. They were a little risque seeming as your pant legs were long enough to cover them, but with the dress you could definitely see the red velvet on the back of the black heels. The heel, a normal 5" inch shaft with a tight point at the end. You always thought they would make a nice weapon if needed and here you might just get your chance.

Stepping out into the hallway following Laswell, you joined Price who was waiting patiently still. You could immediately feel his eyes on you. Somehow, even though the bright blue was like the frozen tundra, they were warm... like you could stay there.

"You ready?" His voice grumbled out.

"As much as I'll ever be," you said side stepping the two ready for this to be over.

*********************************

In the thick of it, you had been let in to the "social gathering". Turns out, if you dress yourself up well enough- no questions are even asked. Looking around, it really was rich socialites. Most of them made rich from their dirty deeds, or the lengths of how far they are willing to sell their souls.

But Laswell was right, the ability of your capability to bullshit your way through this, was impeccable. How grateful you were fluent in Russian.

"Nearly there," Price said being overwatch for you, seeing you make your way into the meeting room of the house where you had learned TF141's target would be assembling his counsel.

Placing your mic and wire under a shelf in a bookcase near the desk, you then quickly slipped out the door and found a way out of the party, heading back to the hotel to help Price and Laswell with translation.

*********************************

The meeting had already started once you had walked back into the office off of Price's room this time. Price offered you headphones which you had put on, closing your eyes to listen. Thankfully with were you had placed the wire, you were hearing everything. Repeating everything that was being said as Laswell wrote it down and Price made sure it was recording in case needing to return back to the information later.

As the meeting called to an end, you had discovered they were doing a weapons drop off tomorrow. Later in the evening to be concealed by dark to be exact. From the work you had done, you had the amount of men that would be there down to the amount of guns and bullets being exchanged.

Laswell stood up ready to go call this in as she squeezed your bare shoulder, leaving Price's office quickly due to their recent break through.

Doing so left you and Price alone.

"Thank you, I know that wasn't easy for you," he said getting up and reaching into his desk pulling out 2 whiskey glasses and a bottle with ember liquid.

"Glad its over, don't ever wish to do it again. Didn't enjoy it," you replied shuddering thinking about the many eyes that were on you. Thankfully you had quietly left, all unscathed and without issue. The whole idea of being in the enemies den however, was a bit much for you. You preferred it to be at the hands of combat, where everyone knows where they stand on the battlefield- not waiting for your cover to be blown.

He gave a quiet single chuckle, sliding the glass to you his way of showing his gratitude. Eventually leaning on the front of his desk near you.

"Dress looks nice, you look nice," he said making you flush but you tried to hide it with the glass he had just supplied you with.

"How funny, Captain. I had men with their eyes on me and none of them brave enough to flirt with me there," you quipped trying to break the awkward tension that was rising.

"Can you really call them men then?" The question he gave only rising your flush further. You snorted, still trying to play this off as banter- not realizing his full intentions of getting you riled. Finding the question rhetorical, you did not answer. Instead you focused on how sore your feet where from trying to almost sprint in the heels away from the lions den.

Making a grimace, you reached down to slip them off. The heavy feeling of Price's hand on your shoulder pushing you back though made you look at him wide eyed.

"What are you doing?"

"My girl can let me do that." He said reaching forward grabbing the leg of the chair you were in and pulling it towards him abruptly. The whole idea of him making a motion looks so easy made you weak at the knees... good thing you were sitting down. Large fingers around the back of your foot, slipping the heel down and off, quickly removing the other one as well.

A sigh of relief left you as you sat back in the chair but quickly looked up as Price was still standing above you.

"Captain?" You asked face now feeling permanently red and warm. Maybe it was the bourbon...

"John. That's the name you're gonna being saying tonight, love." A promise he intended to hold you to.

Making your jaw go slack, his chest reverberated in his normal laugh all while he kneeled in front of you. The sight of it all feeling like a dream to you. Slowly, he left kisses up your legs, taking turns moving back and forth on each one. Finally resting at your thighs, he pushed your dress up revealing your panties that he pushed to the side and buried his face in gently. Tongue separating your warmth.

"John," was all you could say near whisper. Thank god John kept his promises.

[writerslittlelibrary]

I'm your mother now, chapter 7

masterlist series masterlist

part 1 part 2 part 3 part 4 part 5 part 6 part 7 part 8

summary: Yelena is there to save you, but isn't it them you needed saving from?

pairing: Dark!Natasha x teen reader, 

warnings: yelling, a lot of swearing, dark themes, kinda evil Natasha, translated Russian

genre: angst

words: 1961

a/n: chapter 7 is finally here!!! I really need to get more consistent in writing… anyway, I hope you enjoy🫶

You do not have my permission to repost, copy or translate my work

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You had been sitting in that room for hours, the phone call with Yelena long forgotten as you waited patiently. Yelena said she would come fix it, and you trusted her. 

It was exactly 18.00 (6 pm), or so the clock on the phone said when you heard yelling outside the room. You heard a few gunshots, and you ducked under the table as you held your hands over your ears. Your entire body shook with fear as the gunshots drew closer, and soon enough the door to the room you were in opened. 

There stood Natasha, gun in hand and a smile on her face. She ran towards you, getting on her knees next to the table and loving the fact you scrambled towards her, throwing yourself in her arms as you sobbed. 

Natasha smiled as she hugged you closer, rubbing her hand over your back soothingly. “I love you,” you sobbed out, and Natasha simply beamed with joy. 

This day has been incredibly stressful for you, and turns out Yelena was right. Something as simple as having a woman recognise you, would make you realize that leaving was not at all what you wanted. You were loved and safe, and Natasha would always protect you. 

Their plan had worked, and you were finally able to admit to Natasha, and yourself, that you didn't want to leave. 

Natasha would keep you safe. Natasha would love you. Natasha would protect you.

After sobbing in her arms for a few minutes, Natasha made a move to get up, but you wouldn't let her go. “Please don't leave again,” you begged, and Natasha smiled as you cried.

"I am never leaving you again, Malysh,” Natasha told you, and you nodded the best you could. "Promise?” you asked her in a quiet voice. "I promise,” Natasha confirmed.

"Now come on, time to go. We should leave this police station before reinforcements come,” Natasha explained, standing up and dragging you along with her. You kept your arms tightly around her waist, and Natasha rubbed your back with one hand while she used her other to operate her gun.

Outside of the room it was all a blur. You could hear screaming and gunfire as Natasha led you rough the hall. 

When you finally made it outside, a car was already there. Natasha opened the back door for you and helped you get in, she herself joined you on the backseat. There was a woman already in the car, and she sat behind the wheel, waiting for Natasha to close the door. 

The moment Natasha closed the door, the woman stepped on the gas, driving away from all the gunfire and commotion. 

It didn't take long before you fell asleep, Natasha holding you close as your eyes shut and sleep consumed you. Everything that happened exhausted you, and now you were finally safe and cared for you could finally fall asleep. 

After arriving back at the house, something you didn't even notice, Natasha carried you up to your room, the woman who drove the car following her.

After you were settled in bed, Natasha kissed your forehead before going with the woman to the kitchen, planning some things out for the upcoming weeks. Natasha wanted to do so many things with you, but she knew that even though this arrest had been an act, people were actually looking for you, and taking you around could cause suspicion.

And so, together with the woman, she planned it out, transferring your identity over to a girl that already passed. The girl looked similar to you enough, and all Natasha had to do was transfer your DNA to hers, so if she got tested, it would seem as though it was you.

This was all online however, and involved a lot of hacking of medical files and information, hence why she had invited her friend.

Eventually, everything was settled, and the DNA in your medical files matched the DNA of the dead girl. When the girl would be found, they'd test her DNA, compare it with your already existing medical information and draw the conclusion that the dead girl, is indeed, you.

If that was all over, Natasha would finally be able to take you outside without people suspecting her. She could take you anywhere in the world.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning, when you woke up, you were confused to say the least. You were pretty much out of it, and it took you a while to remember the events of yesterday. 

Natasha came for you. Natasha had brought you home…

After a few minutes, your drowsy state left and you got up, surprised to not have been wollen by Natasha. What about your bath? After brushing your teeth you went downstairs, determined to find Natasha and the reason for your lonely awakening. 

When you got downstairs, you found Natasha in the kitchen, the woman from yesterday sitting at the counter chatting with her. The moment you got spotted, the woman closed her laptop quickly, obviously hiding something from you. You didn't really care, instead walking to Natasha and hugging. 

"Good morning malysh. Did you sleep well?” You nodded and hugged her tighter. After yesterday, You never wanted to let her go again.

Natasha smiled at your actions, giving you a tight squeeze before letting go. 

"Sit down, I have breakfast for you,” Natasha stated as she reached for a plate on the counter. It was filled with eggs and toast, and after you sat down she put it in front of you. 

"We'll do bath time tonight,” she simply said as she sat down as well. 

"Y/n, I'd like you to meet Maria,” Natasha then said as she gestured for the other woman at the kitchen counter. "Maria is here to help me with some business. We don't want what happened Yesterday to happen again,” Natasha explained, and you nodded as you gave Maria a smile.

Maria smiled back, before getting up and walking to the couches, grabbing the large bag on top of it. 

"I heard you liked gifts,” she simply said as she walked back, putting the large bag on the counter.  Your eyes lit up, and your breakfast was almost forgotten, until Natasha reminded you. 

"Finish your breakfast first. Then you can open the gifts,” Natasha ordered, and you nodded with a smile as you continued eating. You were quick to finish your breakfast, eager to open the gifts Maria had brought. 

Once you were done, Natasha took your plate away as Maria pushed the bay of gifts your way. 

You took the bag and thanked her, looking at Natasha as you waited for permission to open the bag. Natasha gave you a little nod with a smile, and you took the gifts from the bag. Each of them were wrapped in wrapping paper of your favourite colour.

There were three boxes total. One was heavy and big, while the other two looked more like cd's. You opened the biggest gift first, your mouth falling open as you noticed the Nintendo switch console. 

You smiled widely and quickly got rid of the excess wrapping paper, setting the box down on the counter. 

"Oh my god,” you exclaimed, giving Maria a huge smile as you went to take the Nintendo switch out of the box. "I can't believe it, thank you,” you told Maria.

After you'd unpacked the console, you grabbed the two smaller presents, opening them to find your favorite game and Mario Kart. .

'Thank you, thank you, thank you,” You exclaimed excitedly as you got the games out of the box, putting them in a case that was provided with the Switch. "Can I please go play mama?” you asked Natasha, giving her the best puppy dog eyes you could. 

"Of course you can, my love,” Natasha told you, stroking your hair. "Go sit in the living room.”

You happily took your place in the living room, plopping down on one of the couches and starting your game. You had no idea how long you played for, and eventually Maria came to wish you goodbye, and you told her yet again how grateful you were. 

Natasha had brought you lunch, and surprisingly she had not told you once to put your game away. Instead, she just sat down next to you, reading a book while you leaned against her.

When it was time for dinner, Natasha had told you to go sit at the kitchen counter, something you happily did after playing your game for so long. 

After dinner, Natasha had told you no more games, as she claimed it would be harder for you to fall asleep. You didn't mind, content with the idea Natasha presented of finally giving you your bath. 

You two went upstairs and you picked out your pajamas as Natasha set up your bath. 

Once you were in, Natasha carefully washed your hair as she hummed a song. You were quiet and contently listened to her humming as you ran your hand through the bubbles and played with them a little. 

"Thank you for coming to get me,” You suddenly said, and Natasha stopped rinsing your hair for a second before continuing. 

"I will always come to safe my baby,” Natasha told you as she leaned forward, giving you a kiss on your cheek. 

"I love you mama,” you told her, and it was impossible for Natasha to fight off the smile that was forming on her face. "I love you too, Malysh.”

After your bath, Natasha put you to bed, tucking you in with your two stuffed animals as she gently stroked your hair. "Goodnight my little love,” Natasha told you with a smile, leaning forward to press a kiss to your forehead. 

"What if they come to get me?” you asked Natasha scared, yet Natasha just smiled reassuringly. 

"No one will come to get you. Mama will fight them all off for you,” Natasha told you, and even though you nodded, you weren't convinced. 

"Will you stay with me mama?” you asked her oh so sweetly, how could Natasha ever deny. She got herself ready for bed quickly before crawling next to you, allowing you to snuggle close to her. 

Once you were all nice and comfy, Natasha started stroking your back, hoping for you to fall asleep faster.  

"I never want to leave you mama…” you told her, your voice laced with sleep.  

"You never will…”

-------------------------------------------------------------

Together with Maria, Natasha had made sure the body of a dead girl would be found closely to where you had gone missing. 

Police had quickly moved in, fishing the body from the river and getting it to a hospital. It was clear the girl had been dead for days, and when a doctor took some DNA samples and typed them into the system, your file showed up.

You were dead. You had been murdered.

As the body was cleaned and an autopsy had been performed, the cause of death had been a stab wound, which afterwards ‘you’ were thrown into the river. 

‘You’ had been death before ‘your’ body hit the water, and ‘you’ hadn't suffered. 

After ‘your’ funeral, the discovery of ‘your’ body had made the news, and every news channel was talking about it. 

Natasha got an alert on her phone, opening the news article and reading about ‘your’ death. She smiled to herself. She had won. Natasha had finally won. You were hers. You were her child, her daughter, and no one would ever be able to take you away from her ever again. 

Natasha pulled you closer, kissing your forehead and stroking your hair. 

“You’re my little daughter, my little child. I’ll love you forever,” she promised, as she soon joined your peaceful slumber.

chapter 8

tag list: @carol-romanoff @natsxwife @simp-erformarvelwomen @clintsbigtoe @olsenmyolsen @leenasayeed @naslt @dvrkhcld @nova-kyle @wandanatsbaby @alphalesbianwolffoxdragontribrid @cherlenovix @mrsromanovaa @wandanatsgirl @screechcat @a-spes

Permanent tags: @marvelnatasha12346 @lesbionion @darkstar225 @saraaahsstuff @marvelwomenarehot0

[xenosagaepisodeone]

For the last 2 weeks I've been transfixed on a strain of lost media I've come to call "bad memory induced media", where the supposed media in question does not (or at least more than likely does not) exist, but there are swaths of people convinced that they have definitely seen it at some point. There is rarely anything more to go off of for the hunt than a vague summary outlined in a post on some forum, but the lack of specificity allows people to fill in the blanks with similar types of media that they've seen, giving them the impression that they've already experienced it. I've found that this is extremely common for alleged lost shock media in particular, which isn't surprising. I talked a little about this on my LOL SUPERMAN post, and I get the impression that a similar strain of logic applies on a smaller scale.

Anyway, 2 major cases I have been looking at for a while are Saki Sanobashi/Go For A Punch and Evil Farm Game. Saki Sanobashi in particular fascinates me because an urban legend like this should have crumbled to the wayside by like 2018 at the latest, since that's when anime more or less became demystified to normal people. The basic premise is that it is an 80s/90s horror anime about anywhere from 4-8 girls trapped in a bathroom. The girls talk about their lives, hopes, dreams and philosophies before slowly going insane and dying one by one. If you like horror stuff you probably are already getting the vague impression that it sounds familiar- which could be influenced by any swath of media artifacts from Saw to the Russian Sleep Experiment creepypasta to the Ikea SCP to ClockUp's Euphoria to snippets of Battle Royale to that one Grisaia no Kajitsu arc. OP insisted he found it fully subbed on the deep web (omegalul) and hasn't found a trace of it since, implying some kind of murky origin or legal status (the OVA is not pornographic btw). As you can probably tell, I think this is silly. Like, so much goes into anime production that it would be difficult to hide any traces of this thing's existence. Someone had to voice act those girls. Someone had to sit hunched over a desk and draw that settei. OVAs were such a new thing in the 80s and 90s that both sfw and nsfw series were advertised in magazines. The only way that this could be so lost that not even a MAL entry remains is if it had been a student/indie production or something made for a single comiket event...but even at that....you're telling me that someone still managed to rip this from a vhs and subtitle it? And then chose to upload it to the deep web instead of youtube? even the title sounds like something google translated but didnt format correctly ("Saki Sanobashi" being gibberish while "Saki-san no Bashi" translates to "Saki-san's Bridge").

And yet there are people who will say "I definitely saw this at some point" because they saw a reaction image similar to the alleged scene where the protagonist smashes someone's head into a mirror. "The neck scratching death sounds familiar...." because you watched a higurashi amv! And OP did too, and thought it was so creepy that he involved it in his fake story. It's almost grating how much you have to suspend your disbelief to embrace that something like this exists in the exact way that stories like this insist. While many people have accepted that the series is likely not real in the last 4 or so years, there still persists a cohort of people hunting for Saki Sanobashi, likely because they are kids who are now too old to believe in Squidward's Suicide.

Evil Farm Game gives me a chuckle because it goes like this: a redditor posts to r/tipofmytongue about an old flash game where you play as a farmer who kills his wife and then has to hide her body while going about his farm tasks. The setup is completely fine and actually kind of reminiscent of a few story driven flash games I played on newgrounds as a kid. Many people came forward insisting that they had played this as well, one person even producing a link to a file from their hard drive that they couldn't open, but strongly believed that the game was there. A subreddit was even created to support the search. The twist is that it was a misremembered joke from a vinesauce stream.

Everyone knows that memory is an extremely fallable thing; people can be coaxed into believing that they did or saw things that they didn't with the correct prompts. What gets me is that a lot of people on the hunt for "bad memory induced media" seem to largely be hyping themselves up. They want to believe there is something that exists against all reason no matter what. It's chuuni in nature. Do not get me wrong- the interest in finding a cool, mysterious, haunting piece of media isn't lost on me, but dog, the dopamine hit of finding a previously lost 1985 commercial for almonds in a box of vhs tapes you got from eBay is the same.

[raven-dor]

you and i pt.3

In which steve harrington and his best friend have an argument

PAIRING: steve harrington x reader

WARNINGS: given last name, banter, yearning, argument, swearing, tension that you could cut with a knife

WORD COUNT: 3.1k

🎶 : you and i - one direction

Y/N was excited. Almost too excited for what was sure to be a whole day of sitting in the Scoops Ahoy break room. She had woken up early and made snacks for everyone. She’d even gone as far as getting to the mall (with a very grumpy Dustin) at the same time that Steve and Robin had to show up, 5:30 in the morning.

Suspiciously, she got out of her car with a grin on her face.

She wore the outfit for her date tonight, thinking she wouldn’t have time to go home in between. Steve got out of his car grumpily, and his breath hitched. God, he was screwed. He then decided to be a bit bolder than normal. "Wow." He cleared his throat, smiling wide. "You look beautiful."

Her cheeks turned red, and she would have tried to play it off by scratching her face or 'itching' her nose, but her hands were full of coffee and bags of snacks. "Thanks, Harrington." She squeezed her hand. "It's for my date tonight; I just thought that I wouldn't have time to go home." She was feeling awkward now and thus began the rambling. "I didn't know if it was too much or too little-"

Steve had totally forgotten about Pavelski. 

Shit. 

"It's perfect. He'll love it." That left a bad taste in his mouth. They stared at each other for a minute, before Robin walked in between them to enter to ice cream shop. 

"Morning twats!"

Y/N was knocked out of the trance that was Steve Harrington's eyes, shaking her head to clear her mind. She followed after her best friend, grinning. "Robbie! I brought snacks."

"Wonderful!"

Steve groaned, staring at the ground. "This is going to be a long day."

And he was right—it was a long day. They were halfway through when her 4 a.m. coffee stopped working its magic. Dustin was crankier than usual, and Steve lost all sense of a filter. He was just talking nonstop. Robin was the only one who wasn't totally out of it. She was currently slinging ice cream (as she so lovingly called it) while Steve and Dustin were out spying for potential Evil Russians.

Y/N was sleeping in the break room. She remembered falling asleep what felt like an hour ago, extremely cold because of the fan and the giant freezer to her left. Her eyes opened slowly, looking around the room suspiciously. It was too quiet. She peaked through the window. "Robin, where are Steve and Dustin?"

"Spying."

"Ah." She noticed the headphones around Robin's ears. "I don't suppose you're listening to ABBA in there."

"Nope." She took them off and held them out. "Want to give it a go?"

"Sure."

She shut the window, pressing play on the recording. They had already figured out the translation, but now they needed to know what the code meant.

"The week is long; the silver cat feeds when blue meets yellow in the west. A trip to China sounds nice if you tread lightly." She repeated the words over and over, trying to find some significance to them. Thankfully, she was pulled out of the most boring chant in history by a knock on the back door, yelling back to Robin. "I'll get it!"

She opened the door, and the delivery guy smiled. "Hi."

"Hello."

"Sign here, please."

She took the box and set it down on the table before coming back to the paper. "Thank you." She looked up to smile but saw something familiar. Not a thing she had seen repeatedly, but something she had heard. 

Silver Cat.

"Holy shit." The man's eyebrows crinkled, but he walked away, and Y/N shut the door. Thinking about everything else they had heard in that annoying message, it all clicked. Blue meets yellow in the west. A trip to China sounds nice- She ran out of the back, almost trampling her cousin and Steve. She stood on the fountain in the middle of the mall and repeated the code back in her head. Blue meets yellow in the west, the clock at 9 o'clock, a trip to China, Imperial Panda, tread lightly, Kaufmanns Shoe store.

"Holy shit!"

Steve crossed his arms, glaring. "What happened?"

She grinned at the cranky sailor. "I figured it out."

"Figured what out?"

Y/N crossed her arms. "The message."

She moved towards the edge of the fountain to jump off, but Steve held out his hand. "Here."

She blushed, jumping down. "Thanks, Harrington."

Her cousin crossed his arms. "And you're telling us this right now?"

"I just found out, Dustin. I-" She smiled at Steve. "We need to tell Robin."

She suddenly pulled Steve back into the ice cream shop. Robin was standing at the counter, looking annoyed. "Let me guess... you figured it out."

Y/N nodded, and Steve rolled his eyes affectionately, elbowing her softly. "Valedictorian of ‘85."

"Well..."

Dustin made a face at Robin that definitely read, "I'm really disgusted right now, do something." Robin stared down, a smirk adorning her face. Their hands were still clasped together. She cleared her throat. "Ehem." They both looked at her confused, and as Robin gestured down, Y/N and Steve ripped their hands away, spluttering.

"Uh, I-"

"I-"

"We need to make a plan."

Dustin nodded. "Alright, back room. Now."

Robin grabbed the break sign and wrote on the blank space quickly, Be back in 15 minutes.

They all sat down at the table, and Y/N explained the code. "So, what I gathered is that blue meets yellow in the west means the clock, and the west is 9 o'clock. The trip to China and treading lightly is Imperial Panda and Kaufmann's Shoe store, which is the cargo. The Silver Cat is the shipping company. So at 9 o'clock tonight, there will be shipments from Imperial Panda and Kaufmanns from the Lynx Shipping Company."

Robin smiled, and Steve clapped his hands. "Wow."

"How did you even figure it out?"

She smirked at Dustin. "Wel, my little protege, I was signing a package for Robin when I saw the silver cat on the back of the delivery man’s shirt, and it all clicked."

Dustin grinned. "Nice."

Robin quickly went back to slinging ice cream, and Dustin went to see if there were any comic book stores, leaving Steve and Y/N in the back. She shivered, pulling the jacket tighter, the fan above her twirling as fast as it could. Sadly, they couldn’t control how fast it spun, leaving them to freeze to death. 

Steve leaned forward. "You're coming with us tonight, right?"

She nodded, frowning slightly, struggling to remember what she was missing. "Yeah. Of course."

"What, what's wrong?"

Y/N groaned. "My date is at eight tonight. Shit."

Hope began to bud in him, and he whispered. "Don't go."

She laughed. "What?"

He looked at her desperately. "I said don't go."

She tried not to have an outburst of emotion. "And why not, Harrington?"

"You know why, Wilkins."

She leaned in, whispering. "Say it."

Steve almost spoke the words out loud before realizing that he, once again, drifted off into his thoughts. He smiled half-heartedly. "It's fine. Just go on your date while we do the spying and shit."

She tilted her head. "Really?" She really needed him to be brave because she knew for a fact that she couldn't be. "You want me to go?"

He glared at her. He had been her best friend for eight years; he knew her like the back of his hand. He knew her tricks, and he knew that she was scared, but couldn’t she understand that he was scared, too? "You know I don't want you to go, but if you go on that date, I'm not going to stop you."

Y/N really had no right to be upset, but she was nevertheless. Her chair squeaked as she pushed it out from beneath her. "I'm leaving."

He nodded, the silence deafening. She turned around and looked back at him, really looked at him. She really wanted to say something, yell that she was in love with him, but instead, she sighed. "Steve-"

He interrupted her, waving her away like she was nothing. Like he didn't care if he lost her. A stranger to his best friend. "Have fun."

She gazed down at the coat that warmed her and realized it was Steve's. She slammed it on the table, a bit too harshly, but she didn’t really care. "It'd be weird if I showed up to a date with another guy's coat on, don't you think?"

She grabbed her keys off the counter and yelled back at her very confused friend. "Tell Dustin I'll pick him up at ten."

Robin turned to Steve slowly, waiting for some bullshit explanation. He just stared at the wall in anger.

Fuck.

God, he was so stupid. He should've gone with "fantasy" Steve's plan, which involved grabbing her face and kissing her senselessly. Now, thanks to his dumbass, she was going on a date with Derek Pavelski. Steve put his head in his hands, squeezing his eyes shut, hoping it was all just a bad dream.

Y/N walked into Enzo's at precisely eight o'clock and smiled at the hostess. "Hi, I'm here for a party of two. Maybe under-"

"Y/N!"

Derek was already sitting. The woman smiled and brought her to the table, where Derek was standing at her seat with her chair pulled out. 

She grinned. "Such a gentleman."

"I try." He sat down. "I'm glad you decided to come."

"I am, too. I hope I'm dressed up enough."

Derek laughed. "I hope I am too. I have no idea what the dress code is exactly."

Y/N stared at the menu and, more importantly, the menu's prices. "Wow, I don't know what to get here. It-"

He nodded. "It's expensive."

"Very."

She looked over the top of her menu, staring at him. He was concentrating on what to pick, and she was concentrating on the clock. It was 8:20 already. She sighed.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Great." She put her menu down. "So why'd you invite me here of all places?"

He laughed. "If I'm being honest, it's the first place I thought of. My dad used to bring my mom here all the time before they got divorced. Oh- I-" He stopped for a second and tried to recover. "It's just that I've heard great reviews."

"My mom used to love this place."

He smiled sympathetically. "Guess we both have issues, huh?"

She nodded. "Something like that."

He seemed to go back to his menu, but Y/N could tell he wanted to ask her something. She wasn't going to push. "So, why are you so close with Harrington? Not to pry, but almost our whole lives, you've been around him." He laughed. "From what I've seen, he's kind of an-"

"Asshole?"

He nodded. "He was always such a hardass during basketball. Not to mention, he’s so full of himself."

"Well, he hasn't had it great his whole life. Of course, he'd be an asshole." Derek tilted his head, and Y/N backtracked. "Not that that's an excuse. But even after that, after him being a major asshole, he is still one of the most considerate, kind, loyal people I've ever met. He's like a father figure to all these little shits in town; he- he's especially like a father figure to my cousin, Dustin." She looked at Derek. "I think you might know him. He's the short kid, the one whose hair is always crazy."

"Yeah, yeah. Weird kid."

"Yeah, he is. But Steve really changed last year. He stopped hanging out with Tommy and Carol, and he focused more on actually acting like himself. It's what I admire most about him."

Derek's jaw had dropped, and he had this strange sort of realization on his face. "You love Steve Harrington."

Y/N looked back up from the menu. "What did you say?"

He sat up straight and was almost laughing. "You are in love. With Harrington." He murmured to himself. "I should have known." He looked her in the eye. "What are you doing here?"

"What?"

"What are you doing here with me? Harrington is probably waiting for you, pissed off. He probably has a death wish for me."

She raised an eyebrow. "You want me to go to him?"

"Well, I don't want you to go to him, but I also don't think you should lie to yourself and him any longer. I mean, you're graduation speech was a love letter to the guy." He shook his head and almost laughed. "I'm sorry for wasting your time."

"No, you didn't-"

He nodded in assurance. "I did. We both did." Y/N tilted her head in confusion, and he continued. "Every day we spend apart from who we love, we're wasting time well spent. I mean, this was well spent, but-" He huffed. "You get my point."

"This is the weirdest date I've ever been on. I'm gonna go. Thank you. This was... enlightening."

"Anytime." She walked away, and Derek called the waitress over once again. "Can I get a bottle of Chardonnay please?"

She smirked. "Can I see some ID?"

"Never mind." He put the menu down and smiled sweetly. "Can I get a Shirley Temple?"

Y/N ran to the front of the mall, banging on the windows. The doors were locked, but she knew that Steve, Robin, and Dustin were still in the Scoops Ahoy's backroom. She also knew they would send Steve out to check for noise because Dustin was a chicken, and Robin wasn't an idiot.

She started yelling, relief flooding her senses when she saw a sailor uniform in the distance. She almost smiled at Steve before she remembered their argument. She stopped harassing the mall door and waited for him to let her in. 

He somehow looked worried and confused at the same time, swinging open the door and pulling her out of the rain without a second thought. And then he instantly began interrogating her.

"What are you doing here?"

"I-"

"Shouldn't you be at Enzo's?" Her face paled, and Steve assumed the worst. He forgot about their petty fight, and his eyes grew dark, his King Steve persona peeking out of the shadows. "What did he do? Did he- Did he hurt you? I swear to god if that loser touched you-"

She shook her head quickly. "No, no! Steve! He was great... it just wasn't going too well, so I came back to help."

He crossed his arms. "What do you mean it wasn’t going too well?"

"Steve!" She put her hand on his arm, smiling. "Relax, seriously. Nothing happened. We just realized we didn’t like each other like that." She murmured. "We realized a lot of things, actually."

"What was that last part?"

Y/N grinned. "Nothing, sailor. Let's get going." She let her hand fall from his arm to his hand, pulling him towards her. "I'm excited."

He used her hold against her, pulling her back into his arms. Her breath hitched. "You're sopping wet," he said, taking off his rain jacket. "Here. I have another coat in the break room."

She tried not to melt into the smell and warmth that instantly overwhelmed her senses and smiled softly. "Thanks."

"Don't worry about it."

They walked back into Scoops Ahoy. The back room's lights were out. Y/N rolled her eyes and cleared her throat. "Steve's fine, you idiots. Come out of your attack formation."

Dustin popped out from behind the counter. "Y/N/N!"

"Steve! We thought you got attacked by Russians."

"Nope." He sighed heavily. "Just Wilkins."

Y/N shoved him away and hugged Dustin, pulling him along into the backroom. "Let's go be spies, huh?"

Opening the door leading to the roof, Y/N waited until the last of them had gone through before shutting it as slowly as she could. Yes, it was raining, but she really just wanted to err on the side of caution when there were possibly killer Russians below them. She crouched down between Steve and Robin, watching as the delivery truck backed up to the giant door.

"Look for Imperial Panda and Kaufmanns Shoes," Robin shouted over the storm.

"What do you think's in there?"

"Guns, bombs."

Y/N rolled her eyes. "I doubt it. If anything, it's some chemical warfare. Isn't that what this whole cold war is about?"

They watched as the whistling man in a yellow rainjacket walked up to the door by two tall, armed men.

"Well, whatever it is, they're armed to the teeth," Robin added, helping exactly none of them reach peace of mind.

Steve wiped his eyes clear of water and smiled pessimistically. "Great. That's great."

Dustin leaned over the edge, trying to get a better look with his goggles. "What's in there?"

They all watched as the doors opened, and a small room full of other boxes appeared. He sighed. "More boxes."

Steve grabbed the goggles out of her cousin’s hands. "Let me check it out."

Dustin tugged them back, possessive of the goggles his mother had just gifted him. "No! Stop it, Steve!"

"Guys, seriously, cut it out."

Steve let go, and the goggles hit the building, giving the Russians an exact pinpoint as to where they were hiding. They dropped against the roof, holding their breath. Y/N looked down, her hand and Steve's grasping tightly to each other. Neither said anything and chose to ignore it so they could face the much larger problem at hand. Her thoughts immediately turned to the prospect of the Russians finding them, and she looked at everyone else, panic etched in her expression. "We should leave. Like now."

They all nodded and ran to the door. Y/N whisper yelled. "Wait!"

Robin turned back. "What Y/N/N?"

"If they look for us, they'll come through that door."

Dustin nodded. "She's right."

Steve pulled Y/N with him. "There's another door this way; come on!"

They ran through the other door, Steve closing it gently behind them. They walked quickly down the staircase, and Y/N wiped her eyes, slightly stumbling as she lost her sight. Steve held her up, pushing her hair out of her eyes quickly.

Robin laughed, nudging Dustin, now fueled with thoughts of their bombshell revelation. "Well, I think we found your Russians."

Y/N rolled her now clear eyes, her laughter void of humor. "Thank you, Captain Obvious."

taglist: @kendallroydefender @beebeechaos 

[kerubimcrepin]

Liveblog: Wakfu Season 1 (episodes 21-26)

Episode 21 - Igol

This is a big episode because this is where we get the "Adamai knows stasis magic" lore drop that is never elaborated on, or mentioned altogether.

Episode 22 - Rubilax

Someday, someone will complete a translation of the Dofus manga in russian or english and I'll finally learn what's the deal with this man and why he died and got better and how crazy his doomed yaoi with his dead dragon husband gets.

Heartbreakingly, this day is not yet here.

[Kerubim and Goultard crying together over a drink, begin talking at the same time] I miss my dead wife, Goulatrd/Kerubim. I miss her/him a lot.

Big lore: Sleep masks exist in this universe.

Episode 23 - The Quest for the Dofus

He'll get it eventually. I did.

Episode 24 - Reunion

I love their family so much, I wish they could be happy. But every time something changes, it's far too late... It is tragically realistic, I suppose.

I don't know why, but this is such a pretty frame... The soft morning light, the dim room, the plants the glowing mushrooms...

Also, rare moment to take in what the guest rooms look like at the Sadida castle!

This episode (and at least one past episode) has quite a bit of ciphered text that I haven't been translating because I'm evil. Sorry. It's not the same script as the texts in Aux Tresors, despite the similarities, so you'll have to resort to google, or to decoding it yourself. You could start with the fact that this presumably says "Arbe de vie"

Episode 25 - I Am A Legend

Stasis mention 🔥🔥🔥

This whole scene always makes me tear up. I am actually insane and crazed every time I rewatch the last two episodes.

Your insane Joris trivia of the day is that this scene was changed between various airings/versions of Wakfu. For some mysterious reason. Here's a comparison:

I prefer the old version because.... [blushes] [kicks legs] [twiddles with my hair] HES SO PRETTY—- But also besides me being insane and in love with him, it just seems to have better composition and flow, imo.

My theories for why he was late:

He was sent to get reinforcements from other countries, or call for help. Though it is unlikely that many other kingdoms responded, given how little people care about Sadida (the most likely, normal, and realistic explanation)

He went together with the army of Sadida and the king to fight the war and ran all the way here using his insane speed (the second most likely, normal, and realistic explanation)

He overslept

He got lost

He was busy, man...

He was writing a letter to Keke and Atch about how he beat the shit out of some sadida guards and two girls clapped and cheered and lost track of time.

This exchange has always been so funny to me for some reason.

"What is the situation" He says,, while a giant mecha is about to kill what likely amounts to one-twelfth of the world's population.

I have talked about it a lot, but I am so deeply unwell about how cold he is. A girl lost her lover and is crying inconsolably, and he's not really paying that attention. One twelfth of the world population is about to die, and he won't show an ounce of discomfort or horror or grief.

Obviously he doesn't like it, but showing any weakness is out of the question.

More people have died from Ogrest, and she's like, the 60th girl on a battlefield on his memory to be crying after losing someone.

There are no unsolvable issues in this world.

I need to study him like a bug.

Episode 26 - Mount Zinit

Standing so prettily...

I think one of Joris's core "insanity and depression prevention" life philosophies is that, if he is not present at a battle, and can not physically be present, then he's not to blame for any horrible thing that happens.

I think this philosophy works almost never to quell his feelings of unease, and right now he is calculating 132924 ways he could have gotten here faster and just how much it would fix things.

(guy who runs a blog about pointing out obvious things Joris does voice) There's a very subtle expression change here. He starts looking intently as Amalia proposes going to help Yugo and Adamai. He was going to do this. However, the second he hears her yell "no", his expression changes once more.

We don't see whether he rushes to aid Eva in any way after she collapses from grief, but I will be honest — he would never do that.

Even if he has a pre-established good relationship with her. He just can't do that. He probably stands there awkwardly, in that same exact place, and feels very bad the entire time — because he can neither comfort Eva (they're practically strangers, he hesitated far too long, he'll make things worse—), nor go help Yugo (he can't just leave Eva and Ruel alone... What if more enemies appear? Or what if they think he abandoned them amidst grief? And would he even be useful?)

I think standing next to inconsolable people is Joris's personal hell.

I am insane.

I think one of the reasons Wakfu season 1 is so memorable, and so effective, is that there is no glorious pay off.

Yugo has a heroic moment of friendship overpowering everything — and then, after a second of being scared, Nox overtakes him. Nox wins. And that win is a mere 20 minutes. And for what? Pinpin is still dead. Everyone he killed is still dead.

Yugo doesn't get a glorious win, or his friend back. There is no epic swell of music. Just something quiet, foreboding, and truly meaningless.

OMG HI.

Your daily reminder that canonically, Eva is an amazing artist.

💀

Once again, Sadida Kingdom and Bonta have a very good relationship. Besties who hoard magical nukes together stay together.

[ladykailitha]

Batshit Soulmates Part 6

The second one today. I'm trying to get through my backlog because I have almost twenty chapters that are finished and ready to be posted. And that isn't counting the fact that with my daily goal of 400 words a day, I'm definitely going to have more than that the longer it takes for me to post.

This here is my schedule for the next two weeks, but as I said, since I'm always writing, that "return to one chapter a day" on the 11th? That's probably a pipe dream. So I might end up adding a fourth day to my posting schedule so that I can at least put out a chapter a week for each of my WIPs.

We'll see.

For this chapter we have fun times at the Wheelers (heavy sarcasm), that talk and a cliffhanger? Yeah, a cliffhanger.

In Medias Res| Prologue|Pt 1| Pt 2|Pt 3|Pt 4|Pt 5|

****

They had been traveling awhile when Eddie decided to get the lay of the land by getting higher.

Which was great in theory until he saw the vast expanse of...shit he didn’t even know how to describe it other than evil. And it stretched as far as he could see.

He turned around to get back down when Nancy called out.

“Don’t step on the vines!”

Eddie froze. “Uh what now?”

“They’re connected to the Upside Down,” she said with a huff.

Eddie looked to Steve to translate.

“They’re part of a hive mind,” Steve explained. “You step on a vine and basically you’re stepping on Vecna and basically everything else in this hell hole.”

“Shit!” Eddie hissed as he tried to come up with a way to get down without waking up the whole Upside Down to their presence.

“I was thinking that now would probably be a good time to get my guns,” Nancy murmured.

Eddie finally decided that fuck it, he was just going to by pass all the vines jump down.

He landed deftly on his feet and as he pulled up his jeans a little he said, “You, Nancy Wheeler, have guns at your house? Guns as in plural?”

Robin pointed excitedly at her. “I know, isn’t she bad ass?”

“I have a Russian pistol,” Nancy said with a cock of her head, “and a revolver.”

Steve huffed out a laugh. “You almost shot me with that one.”

Nancy smiled back and with a teasing lilt to her voice replied, “And you almost deserved it.”

TWAP!

Steve stepped back with the force of a denim vest being thrown in his face. He looked up at Eddie in shock.

“For your modesty, dude.”

Steve looked down at the vest in confusion. “Wha–”

Just then there was great big roar and the ground shook. Robin tumbled into Eddie and Steve barely managed to catch Nancy before elbowed him in the side.

Steve and Nancy were able to keep on their feet but Robin and Eddie fell to the ground.

Eddie looked at Robin and then back at where the noise came from.

“Guns are really starting to sound good right now,” Eddie muttered.

Robin looked back at him and nodded. “Oh yeah.”

Eddie was rubbing his shin as Robin’s heel had kicked it on her way down but his brain turned off when he saw Steve walk by as he pulled on Eddie’s vest.

Shit. He had miscalculated on that one. He hadn’t wanted Nancy Wheeler to ogle his soulmate but he didn’t take in the fact on how hot Steve would look wearing his battle vest. He only barely managed to help Robin to her feet before he was hoping forward to catch up with Steve.

His little lizard brain lighting up with, “Hot boy! Must follow hot boy now,” as his feet danced around the vines to be by Steve’s side.

And just maybe Steve wanted it too, because as Eddie fell in step next to him, Steve blushed and ducked his head.

Eddie grinned up at him as they made their way through the darken forest of the Upside Down.

****

Eddie kept looking over at Steve, who was looking like he had merely taken a tumble in gym instead of being eaten alive.

And yeah that was hot, it was also worrying as fuck. Eddie was starting to think that maybe Steve wasn’t a dick, the dude was just traumatized.

Robin and Nancy walked slower behind them to give them some privacy. Finding your soulmate in the middle of the end of the world, again, sucked.

“Hey, I wanted to thank you for saving my ass back there,” Steve said, softly.

Eddie bumped their shoulders together. “You saved your own ass, man. What you did there was very Ozzy.”

“Who?” Steve asked, confused.

“Ozzy Osborn? Black Sabbath?” Eddie prompted. Steve’s confusion only deepened. “He bit the head off a bat on stage.”

“Wha?” Steve said, rearing his head back. “I don’t know you’re talking about.”

Eddie smiled faintly. “It’s okay. All I was saying that that was a very metal thing you did back there.”

“And metal is...good?” Steve asked, unsure.

Eddie chuckled. “Very.”

“Thanks,” Steve said, grateful the dirt and grim of the Upside Down hid his blush.

They walked on for a few moments in silence. “I was so jealous of you, by the way.”

Steve reared back his head. “Me? Why?”

“Dustin talks about you all the time, man,” Eddie said. “Like all the time. Never shuts up about you, in fact. The kid worships the ground you walk on. Called you a badass on more than one occasion.”

Steve scoffed. “Dustin thinks I’m badass?”

“Oh, yeah,” Eddie said thoughtfully. “I think I just couldn’t accept that Steve Harrington was a good dude, you know? Rich parents, popular, good with girls, not a douche? There was no way. It just flies in the face of life, the universe, and everything. Including my very own Munson doctrine.” He twisted the rings on his fingers nervously.

Steve reached out and gently took his hand.

Eddie took a deep breath and let out it slowly. “I’m still jealous because you’re the real deal. I’m learning that outside DnD, I’m no hero. I see danger and I turn and run. Or at least that’s what I discovered about myself this week.”

Steve squeezed his hand. “Hey, give yourself a break. There was nothing you could have done about Chrissy, okay?”

Eddie let out a shuddering sigh. “The truth is that if those two ladies hadn’t dived in after you, I would still be up in that boat. I don’t know how you managed to get the loyalty of two of the smartest girls in school, especially with one of them being your ex, but holy shit dude. Nancy just dived in no hesitation.”

But before Steve could answer another rumble ripped through the Upside Down.

“Jesus!” Steve hissed as Eddie said, “Here we go again!”

They clutched each other as they struggled to remain on their feet. Steve looked up at Eddie and his breath stopped in his chest, tightening like a vice.

They were so close that Steve could taste their mingled breathes. He yearned to just lean forward and–

Robin tapped his shoulder. “Come on, let’s get to Nancy’s before another quake hits us.”

****

When they got to Nancy’s room, their hope for salvation turned to ash like the dust falling from the sky.

“What do you mean they don’t exist?” Eddie hissed.

Nancy looked like she was going to cry. “The Upside Down is stuck in 1983. Most likely the day Will vanished and I didn’t get my guns until after.”

Even Robin looked disappointed at not being about to see Nancy’s guns.

It truly seemed like all was lost when Steve suddenly stopped.

“Holy shit!” he cried. “Can you hear that?”

Nancy and Robin shared a glance.

“Hear what?” Nancy asked.

“Dustin!” Steve said happily. “I can hear Dustin! And Lucas! And Max!” He giggled.

“It’s like they in the walls!”

Eddie grimaced. The pain must be really getting to the guy if he was hallucin–

But then he could hear it too. Steve and Eddie shared a look and they turned, booking it for the door.

They thundered down the stairs and they noticed the golden light glittering around the chandler.

But now the girls could hear the kids too. It sounded like they were in trouble.

All four them were drawn to the light. It was warm and comforting. And god, Eddie couldn’t stop touching the light.

“It’s warm,” he muttered.

The other three reached up and touched the glittering glow. Steve and god, how Steve seemed to watch to reach out to him as well.

“Does anyone know Morse code?” Nancy asked, trying to figure out how to communicate with the right side up.

Steve shook his head and even Robin wasn’t clueless.

Eddie licked his lips. “Um...does SOS count?”

Nancy nearly screamed at him, but let Eddie do his thing. They managed to communicate with Dustin, Erica, and Max, who had somehow gotten themselves under house arrest. Or whatever the hell the cops wanted to call keeping children against their will.

They managed to find a way to communicate with them through Holly’s LiteBrite. And so Dustin rambled at a million miles per hour about gates and murders and Vecna.

“Does anyone understand what he’s talking about?” Nancy asked.

Everyone shook their heads. So she simply sent back a single question mark.

“How many times do I have to be right on the money before you guys trust me?” Dustin screamed.

Steve sighed. “Jesus Christ, this kid has to get his ego in check.”

Eddie leaned over so that he could talk to Steve around Nancy.

“It’s his tone, right?” Eddie asked.

“Yes!” Steve agreed, happy that he had someone who understood what a menace Dustin was at the best of times.

Basically it boiled down to needing to get to the nearest gate. Eddie’s trailer.

“Which great and all,” Eddie huffed. “But let me tell you, Forest Hills is no easy walk from here.”

Nancy looked around at them like they were stupid. “The kids left their bikes here. There should be four of them in the garage.”

Steve rolled his eyes. But they all dutifully followed her out to the garage.

The bikes were tiny. God, are they minuscule. They all climbed onto the bikes and rode all the way to the trailer park.

And if Eddie hung back to watch Steve’s ass all the way there... fuck you, no he didn’t. The view didn’t hurt, though.

They made it his trailer and they laid down the bikes in front of it. Eddie began to shake. Frozen in fear. He couldn’t go back in there. They couldn’t make him.

They could find another ga–

Suddenly there was a warm hand on his shoulder. “I know you don’t want to go in there. But we need to get back to the Right Side Up, breathing the shit down here isn’t good for you.”

Eddie gulped, but nodded.

“I’ll be right beside you,” Steve continued softly. “If you need to, take my hand.”

Eddie instantly latched on to Steve’s hand as he led the group into the Upside Down version of Eddie’s home.

He stumbled a bit as he saw the great, big, red, pulsating...wound.

“Shit!” he whispered, a little awed and a lot scared. “That’s where she died. Like right where she died.”

Steve squeezed his hand gently. “I’m sorry, Eds. We just need to find a way to contact the kids and get us out of here, okay?”

Eddie looked around at his home and just wanted to cry. Nothing was where it was supposed to be and yet exactly where it was supposed to be. And that really fucked with his head.

Nancy looked up at the gate. “It’s too high. There’s no way we can get to it without help.”

Steve and Robin looked around trying to see it there was something that could be used to pry it open from below.

Eddie knew he should help them. He knew where things were kept. But he just couldn’t move. All he could do was stare up at that red wound in his ceiling pulsating with a sick twisted form of life.

Just then something poked through it and Eddie screamed. He didn’t mean to, but the sound had escaped his mouth before he even knew what it was.

What it was when Steve got him calmed down enough to actually see it, was a shovel.

It didn’t make him feel any better, until that curly little mop of hair stuck through the now decent sized hole in the ceiling.

“Henderson!” he cried in relief.

“There you are!” Dustin called back. “Do you think that you guys can work it open from your end while we work it open from our end?”

“Is everyone okay?” Steve asked.

“Yeah, we’re fine,” Dustin said. “Let’s get you guys out of there, okay?”

Between them, they were able to get the Gate open and a mattress set up to catch their fall.

“What are those stains?” Robin sneered.

Eddie looked up at them and licked his lips. “I, um... I don’t know what they are, honestly.”

Robin’s lip curled. “Gross.”

The truth was that Eddie really didn’t know. He had gotten it used a couple of years ago when his old mattress fell apart. They could have been there from its previous owner for all he knew.

“So who’s going up first?” Steve asked.

“Not you, pretty boy?” Eddie teased.

Steve blushed. “I want to make sure everyone else gets up there okay.”

Robin eyed the sheet rope and then said, “I’ll go.”

Steve nodded and watched carefully as Robin scaled the rope. She flipped around and landed on the mattress with a flomf!

Dustin helped her to her feet.

“That was quite fun actually.”

Back in the Upside Down, Eddie looked at Nancy and Steve, but neither one moved, so he shrugged. “I guess that means I’m next.”

This was Eddie’s least favorite part of gym, climbing rope ladders. He didn’t ever see the point. Though getting detention for pointing out it was part of the military industrial complex was one of his best days in that class, so...

Up he went. It wasn’t that he couldn’t climb the damn thing, he just loved ranting about having to.

“Okay, Nancy,” Steve said. “You’re next.”

But she didn’t answer. Steve turned to her but she was just standing there. He called out to her again.

“Nancy?”

Eddie’s head immediately popped back over the gate. “Shit!”

Steve shook her shoulders, but she remained immobile.

No, no, no, no...

Not Nancy!

****

Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Epilogue

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[blood-orange-juice]

@narcoticwriter

Ok, this is semi-crack but if Hoyo decided to make the bad guys Russian I'm allowed to invoke Slavic symbolism.

In East Slavic cultures the hearth used to be associated with meanings you normally attach to the netherworld.

(no one really thinks like this anymore, of course, and most city dwellers never encounter a proper hearth in their lives, but it's still there in fairy tale imagery and sometimes in language and the metaphors we use for things)

I actually don't know what the correct translation is. Oven? Fireplace? The thing is HUGE, incredibly ugly and also building one is an art (it's supposed to distribute heat in a very specific way). We do not spread this symbolism to Western fireplaces or fire in general.

It's a bit chthonic and associated with everything pagan and unclean (ritually and literally. the soot).

Very far from the cozy "sitting near a fireplace with a cup of hot chocolate", it's a place where Real Stuff Happens and most real stuff in this world is messy and unpleasant.

But also only because of it a home can be called a home. It's the heart of the house.

In superstitions it's home to a friendly fae househelper (the little dude lives behind it) and in fairy tales it's sometimes an entry point for minor demons (I don't remember if they get through the chimney or through the fire itself).

Then in other fairy tales there's Baba Yaga, The Evil Witch, who is also probably an aspect of a forgotten goddess of death (as in many other places, Christianity weeded out Slavic myths to the point of near disappearance and fairy tales were a form in which some of those survived). This lovely lady occasionaly cooks adventurers in the oven/hearth as a part of their rebirth process. Occasionally she just cooks and eats them. Folks with good work ethics are usually safe (in most tales they offer to perform some work for her in exchange for help or simply for not being eaten).

Baba Yaga, as far as I know, is somewhat recognized by the English-speaking pagan community, they interpret her as yet another name for the Crone face of the Triple Goddess (the archetype on which Hoyo likely relied when writing the Moon Sisters).

(do you see the fire and moon connection now?)

I'm surprised how well it fits a lot of Arle's themes. A fire that is otherwoldly and demonic and associated with rebirth and an almost-forgotten goddess of death and moon, but also it's just fire in a hearth, something to warm your house with.

This was probably not Hoyo authors' thought process and they just thought of rebirth, destruction and tamed fire.

But the author is dead and the hearth means what it means, and if you dig into humans' relationship with fire long enough you end with this sort of symbolism anyway, so I declare this angle valid.

[atalienart]

I disagree with the Latin stuff and the names. Lucy Sartor and Luna Stellar would sound pathetic to me as well in a more "realistic" not fully fairytale-esque context, just like Gardner and Taylor; or worse, because those are at least actual common surnames. I think it's depending on the language you're writing for. My first language is a romance language, not English, and all the names that try to be clever using Latin sound way more obvious at best and straight up ridiculous at worst to me. Like, say, Harry Potter. It all sounded so silly 6yo me was mocking them with my mother while we read. Of course Remus is called Lupin and of course Snape is Severus and Draco is called Malfoy. Of course xD

I do like the subtlety of names too, and I was just discussing with a friend a few days ago how interesting it is in a mix of narrative and metanarrative way that names are almost always meaningful in fiction, because it seems to create that tension between what is predetermined and what isn't in fiction. Almost as if the character at some point could turn around and look at the writer directly. As if they had the weight of the life they had to live since they were born, worldbuilding aside (obviously not as interesting in the context of actual in-world prophecies and such), and that is precisely the text! Like that one chapter in Nietszche's Zarathustra. "Good and evil, and joy and woe, and I and thou—coloured vapours did they seem to me before creative eyes".

Personally, I don't see a problem with those names. Are they on the nose, sure, but they don't sound pathetic to me. As I said, it's your own language that makes you like them or not. I remember that the minister of magic was called Fudge? (if we're taking HP as an example) and it was translated in the Polish version as Knot (which can come from "knocić", making something really poorly) and I really loved it, it made me laugh. But I wouldn't want them to translate dr House's surname because it would sound really silly. And even if I know what those names mean it's fine, I have another context.

I myself usually either look for names beginning with a particular letter so it's easier to tell the characters apart, or just think what suits them sound-wise. Then I check what the name means and sometimes I get really surprised. Sometimes I go look for names from other languages. With surnames it's similar. I also play with letters or look for words at random. To someone, somewhere they will always sound silly because they'll sound similar (or identical) to some random word. It's how it is. But I also use Latin to name some things and I don't think they are worse because people who know Latin or romance languages will recognise the connection/meaning, that's why I use it. (Shit, I even have a character named Korbin who takes care of ravens xD) I remember a discussion about the Grishaverse and how to Russian speaking people it was just Georgieverse. It's how it is. Sometimes I cringe seeing Polish names used in English books. Sometimes writers use the diminutive version of a name thinking it's a legit normal name. I mean...

I really wonder how would you solve the subtlety issue, taking into consideration that to have a meaning behind the word you need to take that word from an existing language. Like would you think if I named a character Anna Lato it would sound subtle for your ears? "Lato" means "summer" in Polish, it's also a surname. Anna comes from Latin but functions as a normal name. Let's say the character has a sunny personality. Is this subtle enough? To someone somewhere, (probably in Poland) it might still sound silly.

[birdiebirdjay]

I haven't been on tumblr in a bit (more like a month), who is the Zoe in your bio, are they a mutual?

sorry if this is too personal or weird, I'm just nosy and like your content.

hi anon!

the zoe in my bio (@percyweasleyapologist) is my lovely sunshine evil whimsical girlfriend who i love so so much <33 she is the love and light of my life hehe

sunshine because i will sometimes call her solnyshka (a russian pet name that translates roughly to sunshine) and evil whimsical because one time some funny stuff happened and i made a joke about her being in her villian arc and she was like 'you fool i have always been in my villian arc' and i was like 'dam okay :( can i be your funky silly guy who sits on the armrest of your throne and doodles little cats and tism creatures' and she was like 'sure yeah :3' and i was like 'YIPPEE EVIL WHIMSICAL QUEEN'

or something like that :D <3

SHE RECENTLY ALSO REACHED 500 FOLLOWERS WHICH IS REALLY COOL SO YOU SHOULD GO CONGRATULATE HER

and don't worry! i love asks and i love yapping about my girlfriend :3

[lostacelonnie]

as per Some demand: on polish romantic literature, the depiction of russians, and world serpent of honkai impact 3rd fame. apologies if this is very unorganized but its all just things i was thinking about while distracted in class and not TERRIBLY serious analysis

so before i begin. im very sorry if i get Some details wrong because the main piece i’m using for comparison, dziady (część III) by adam mickiewicz, is something ive read a While ago and in all honesty did not feel like rereading just for this as its just general thoughts. i przy okazji przepraszam że postuję o mickiewiczu ale jest on najlepszym kontekstem do sytuacji mam nadzieję że mi wybaczycie.

anyway. to give non-polish people a bit of context: dziady (część III) was written by mickiewicz during his time in russia, after being exiled from his home country (poland, lithuania, or belarus, depending on who you ask). most of the work is centered around what is means to “fight for independence” (as this was a time when poland was under russian occupation, and didnt technically. Exist. mickiewicz’s nationality is a topic of discussion even today, but thats a whole another topic so i wont get into it), why the nation has to suffer, if this was god’s plan, a fighter vs a poet vs a "traitor" during a country's fall etc etc but that’s not what i’m going to focus on here.

the main thing i want to touch on, as you might’ve guessed by the first paragraph, is the depiction of the russian General Populace- specifically, petersburg’s. there’s a couple of relatively well-known scenes from this work but the one most relevant here is ustęp. i could not find an english translation available online for free and, seeing as even its relevant fragments are Quite Long, did not feel like translating them myself (sorry). but there’s two main ones to look at: petersburg and do przyjaciół moskali.

petersburg shows the vision of russians as very… individualistic. walking among the street are different social classes: the tsar and tsaritsa, a military general showing off his battle-earned awards despite the cold, low ranked soldiers, women in expensive fur coats and colorful hats, wealthy people getting into their carriages; and the poor, freezing and hungry, but still talking about how honored they are to see their “superiors”. they arent bad at heart, but theyre passive, uncaring of how both other nations and even other russians suffer under the tsar’s tyrannical rule, as long as they, themselves, aren’t inconvenienced.

do przyjaciół moskali (to [my] friends muscovites) is less of a narrative part as it is the musings of mickiewicz himself, remembering the cold and unfeeling faces of russians that exiled him, killed and imprisoned his friends and other people, all for the purpose of not having to deal with any problems themselves- no matter if they ruined someone else’s life. however, as he talks with hate about the powers over them, it’s not the people himself he curses out- rather, he wishes that they were free, and brave enough to do something instead of becoming co-perpetrators.

so, tldr: in this work (and many, many others; this sentiment is present throughout a lot of polish literature from romanticism onwards) the russian people are depicted as not inherently evil by themselves, but rather unwilling to fight back against the oppressor that is their own government, oftentimes even reveling in it (the so-called “heroism of captivity”); that, or being just entirely ignorant of their homeland's crimes.

another theme that is integral to this work is messianism of the polish nation- supposedly, the reason why Everything Just Keeps Going Wrong For Us is because god has a plan in which the polish have to suffer, so that nobody else has to, directly paralleling jesus. 

BUT. to get into the part in which i actually start talking about honkai. what i’ve been thinking about is that the way world serpent agents are depicted in the game is actually quite similar?

taking raven herself as an example- first of all, she is Actually Literally Russian but that doesn’t matter here. so before mei joins world serpent, raven is this Mysterious Evil person, working for a Mysterious Evil organisation. she’s cold and ruthless and doesn’t hesitate to carry out her mission if it means getting a paycheck. and then lament of the fallen happens, and mei is in world serpent, and natasha is this. still not a Warm person, yeah? but she’s passionate about being a bartender, and takes care of the roost. simple woman just trying to survive. she’s not a perfect example, of course- she did leave world serpent at a point, only coming back when she realized her other paychecks just simply aren’t enough to sustain both her and the kids- but she’s still a mercenary. she kills people for money. not a bad person, just forced into a terrible situation due to something out of her control- but nowhere near a morally pure one, either. (which i’m very happy about, because that would be boring).

but, if you want to dig deeper, there’s the gray serpents themselves, as well- cold in both the metaphorical AND the literal sense, being machines and all. this one speaks for itself, i think? emotionless and unwilling to compromise, only caring to serve their purpose while continuing the flame chasers', namely mobius’s, legacy. but even the serpents themselves are individuals- they have their own personalities, and interests, even while being mass produced drones. but, like the russians in dziady, theyre mostly focused on themselves- pretty well seen with the serpent present in the beginning of salt snow holy city arc (disconnected from the thing keeping him alive, just because the majority would be better off on their own, with no regard of what would happen to the less fortunate ones).

but, to touch on the previously mentioned messianism- in honkai, that could be attributed to anyone not belonging to ws, especially in arc city and during project stigma- bearing the burden of being, in a smaller or larger degree, sacrificed for some twisted definition of the “greater good”.

additionally, one of the characters who cooperate with world serpent while not being its part is cocolia, who is russian; the person who (albeit accidentally) gets kevin out of the sea of quanta is seele, raised in russia; and misteln, an important part of carrying out project stigma, was not only “created” in siberia, but also approached by the serpents, and recruited, exactly there.

i don’t think i have a good conclusion for this one? as i said, just general thoughts on a topic i found interesting. i’m sure there’s more that could be said here but that’s what comes to mind ^-^

[edennill]

Finrod Rock Opera, Duet of Finrod and Beren — thoughts:

(In the vein of my Duel of Finrod and Sauron analysis except probably shorter, we'll see. Also I'm treating the Duet and "Plen" as one song because they form a whole in my opinion)

Lyrics + translation here, parts 13-14, although I tweaked the translation in places. Starts somewhere around 58:30 in this livestream.

Finrod: Who shall I stand/At the throne of Day/A spellbound witness to others’ vows? (Kim stanę ja/U tronu Dnia/etc) A beautiful verse, but I have spent several months trying to guess what it means... problem is, with Finrod speaking, it can be absolutely anything.

"You are not afraid to die?" "It is something one can only sing about"... "And worse than death is only fear"

Beren calls them brothers 🥺

Finrod: But death makes all equal/and the gift of your kin/we will share between the two of us" — definitely a case of "this particular person would never phrase it in this particular way" but also it's pretty and sad and I like it so it gets a pass.

Onto "Plen":

I must admit, Sauron is delightful in this play. I can't believe I'm saying this, but he's just so entertainingly cartoonishly evil.... Also the voice actor manages to make him sound both energetic and doing something completely entirely routine (that is, killing people).

Exilic melancholy...

A digression, but quoting this in English is almost killing me. In general I take in the opera through an unholy mix of Russian and Polish and my own in-progress translation... what that one post calls Slavic Esperanto. Whatever this is... hurts.

"I’m vaguely troubled by this hero/who decided to set himself in songs of power against me" lol.

Когда останусь в пустоте чёрной? (1:05:48)— I understood nothing except the last word being "black" before checking the translation but aughhhh the melodic movement of that bit is gorgeous.

And then the fluid transition into Sauron's words and back into Finrod's... chef's kiss.

"With each of his companions, he will die many times." — I can only think of that one fanfic in whose light this is semi-literal because of the very nature of the spell of concealment (and probably because Finrod is the kind of person to let people take strength from his own resources when he already has none). :(

"The price to stand at the throne of Day/Unaware of sorrows and of partings" — beautiful, but once again, Finrod, what in Arda and without do you mean?

"I beg you let me go first" :(

"Niet!" [clatter offstage (representing the chains breaking? or the actor falling off his pedestal)]

[they-lived]

20 questions for writers

@theblueeyedfirebender THANKS FOR THE TAG FRIEND I LOVE YOU LOTS 💙💛💙💛💙💛

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

41! (And an additional 37 on ffn 🤪 for a total of 78 just cause I was curious what 11 years of a hobby produces)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

782,267… holy crap 😅

3. What fandoms do you write for?

On my page you’ll find fics for Dragon Age (2 fics), Resident Evil (3 fics), Baldur’s Gate (2 fics), Until Dawn (2 fics), Critical Role (1 fic), Fullmetal Alchemist (6 fics), and Yuri on Ice (25 fics)!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Bloom in the Dark (Yuri on Ice)

Сонечко - Sunshine (Yuri on Ice)

What I Wouldn’t Do (Yuri on Ice)

Truth (Yuri on Ice)

Four Hidden Talents of Yuri P (And His Hidden Achilles Heel) (Yuri on Ice)

5. Do you respond to comments?

I used to not respond because on ffn you pretty much had to dm people to do so which felt weird (especially because I was 11-17 on there and did not want anyone knowing that fact even tho it was pretty obvious in hindsight) but now I respond to almost every comment I get! Fandom is a shared experience and I want to communicate more!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Lessons I Learned From Loving You Alone (Dragon Age) ~ Loghain’s wife had a really tragic life in my brain and I leaned in HARD

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I almost always do angst with a happy ending but I think the happiest is a toss up between Сонечко or As The World Begins to End (which is my resident evil meets pride prejudice and zombies mash up)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I wouldn’t call it hate necessarily but weirdly I get a lot of discourse around Yuri P being Ukrainian but like… I have always written him this way and I always will lol. It’s a part of my brand at this point. For the most part they’re pretty tame comments tho

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep! Most of the time I use sex as a way for characters to express their indescribable inexplicable connection or just to explore a couple in their most intimate moments. I love smut with funnies too so I try to throw that in there… also yes I do write porn without plot just because I want to lol.

10. Do you write crossovers?

Not really. Closest I got to was As the World Begins to End, which is Resident Evil in a similar world as Pride Prejudice and Zombies, but the zombies and lore were still RE based. It was more inspired by than anything else.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Back in the day someone wrote a fic “based on” one of mine but they just changed the names and nothing else. I still laugh about it because like… what an odd thing to do.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yup! Into Portuguese, Japanese, and Russian! It was very cool and they were so nice!!!!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope but I’d be down!

14. What is your all-time favorite ship?

Don’t ask me that my stomach hurts (it’s probably Everlark or Jasper or Otayuri or Royai don’t make me choose~)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I never say never but golly it’s been hard to keep writing I Will Carry You idk why I really lost steam on it. I also have a fic I’m literally 25 pages deep into that was supposed to be a bit fic that I have not posted but WANT TO FINISH SO BAD

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I’m super good at eliciting the specific niche emotion I’m looking to express and hitting the exact topic I want to address. When I want something to be heightened and funny I nail it, when I want something to be bone deep nostalgia I’ve got it. That part is really fun for me personally.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I. Hate. Describing. Scenes. And. Action! My theater of the mind is pretty garbage so when I have to exposit what something looks like I cannot for the life of me enjoy it. My brain shuts off and on autopilot I go.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Even though I am bilingual I still get nervous doing this. Mostly because I’m smol and embarrassed but also because I really have to decide what the purpose is. I love having multilingual characters I grew up on the border between the us and Mexico and I have constantly been surrounded by multilingualism and generally think it’s dope. But I prefer to write the dialog in italics if it’s in another language so my audience can immediately understand what’s going on and have the full picture. If I don’t want them to know what’s being said I simply gloss over it lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

*Glances wearily at my self insert Harry Potter fic I wrote when I was 12 and had the audacity to post on ffn* … uh… Hunger Games

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Changes by the day honestly but the top 5 are as follows in no particular order:

- As the World Begins to End (p&p will ALWAYS take me out you guys)

- Сонечко (the way I trauma dumped in this one is still so raw and so relevant. The fact that family and love really does win OUCH)

- An Ode to the Daughters of Darkness (first and only attempt at a more poetic style and some of it really holds up)

- Idioms and Idiots (idk I feel like I could turn this into a whole novel it’s wholesome and funny I smile the whole time I’m reading it I love her)

- Long May You Reign (I have reread this bitch so many times since she’s been posted I love the chaos the funnies and the feels. Idk man I just have an insatiable craving for Royai to be parents and this makes me laugh while writing it)

Tagging @masterdisastre @lou-is-lurking @kaleidodreams @weeheilandcoo and anyone else who wants to ✨✨✨✨

[aroeddiediaz]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @cal-daisies-and-briars , @jesuiscenseedormir , @diazsdimples

How many works do you have on ao3?

27!

What's your total ao3 word count?

61,537

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently I’m pretty much exclusively a 9-1-1 writer, but in the past I wrote a lot of Flarrowverse (do they still call it that?). I also have published fics for Fantastic Beasts and a few anime (Given, Haikyuu, Saiki K). Given the number of Bnha wips i have locked away in the vault it’s amazing I don’t have anything published for that.

Top 5 fics by kudos:

(I am omitting all the Flarrowverse fics in my top 5 on the basis that they were written in high school and I’ve changed as a person, and they probably only beat out on the numbers due to being up for years longer)

1. Kabe-Do’s and Kabe-Don’ts (Given, 861 kudos)

2. You’re Not Special (Saiki K, 598 kudos)

3. How Eddie Learned To Stop Worrying And Embrace The Kitten Life (9-1-1, 327 kudos)

4. The Boy Formerly Known As Miracle (Haikyuu, 277 kudos)

5. Under The Hood (9-1-1, 275 kudos)

Do you respond to comments?

Yes!! As many as I can!

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This probably has to be The Crimes of Queenie Goldstein, in which Queenie is put on trial for her actions during the war. Don’t @ me but Queenie turning traitor was bu far the most interesting part of the Crimes of Grindelwald (the only interesting thing, really). There could be such an interesting story between her and Tina if only JKR would let the movies out of her grasp.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Fuck, idk if I have a happiest ending fic, a lot of them tend to not have that much story arc. (A lot of established relationship fluff or smut lmao). I guess if I had to pick one it would probably be How Eddie Learned To Stop Worrying and Embrace The Kitten Life.

Do you get hate on fics?

Not since that one anti-olicity fic that I wrote while deep in the trenches of Flarrowverse discourse, which I totally deserved :/. I have regrets. Also I should probably orphan/delete that one if I haven’t already. In my defense, high school. I have learned.

Do you write smut?

Yea lol. I think my 9-1-1 stuff has been almost exclusively smut. Idk how it happened. (I do know how it happened smut is fun to write)

Craziest crossover?

I haven’t published any of my crossover fics :( none of them have been complete enough. I have many many unfinished RotBTD wips that have never seen the light of day though.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Who would steal my stuff? Lol

Have you ever had a fic translated?

One time someone offered to translate one of my fics into Russian but idk if that ever actually happened.

Have you co-written a fic before?

Nope

All time favorite ship?

Right now definitely Buddie! Percabeth holds a special place in my heart though <3

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Ok. After the end of the Heroes of Olympus Series, but before Trials of Apollo was announced, I tried my own hand at writing the sequel that was clearly coming based on all the loose threads in the final book. It was going to be a Solangelo quest to save the Oracle of Delphi from Python, while Akhys tries to poison Percy to turn him into an evil god(?). Half the details have been lost and I desperately want to remember them, because I haven’t attempted anything nearly as cool or ambitious since then. The first 5 chapters are posted on my ao3 (Will Solace and the Oracle’s Cry) and I still think high school me had the most interesting characterization of Will out of everyone else on the internet at the time. Even if it is still very 2015.

What are your writing strengths?

I think I’m good at getting into the heads of different characters. Understanding their motives and weaknesses.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Editing.

Lmao I have a lot of weaknesses but I definitely struggle the most with trying to look back on or change things I’ve already written, even when it’s necessary.

Also my tendency to just drop fics if I stop working on them for too long. Rip to my wip graveyard.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

That’s a minefield I’m not willing to play in. Unless it’s Chinese. Very limited amounts of Chinese. Or like, a pet name or phrase that’s already ubiquitous in fandom so I’m not risking anything.

First fandom you wrote in?

Percy Jackson!! That Will Solace quest is the first thing I ever wrote! I definitely had a tendency to jump into the deep end with new hobbies lmao. Like my first ever cosplay that took me 3 years to complete.

Favorite fic you've written?

I think my favorite fic is always going to be the one I’m currently working on writing. But I am very proud of the silly little dramatic ironies in In Hindsight, which I wrote entirely over one long lunch the day after 7x04 broke me. Also I have to shoutout Teacher’s Pet, that one ruler spanking fic nobody ever reads because it’s Eddie/Ana lmao. I enjoyed putting in a bunch of tiny incompatibilities between them. So, uh, I guess my favorite thing in my own writing is dramatic irony?

Tagging: @aspecbuddie @pirrusstuff @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @lemonzestywrites @your-catfish-friend @inkmortal-trash389 @evanbegins s @wildlife4life @eddiebabygirldiaz @epicbuddieficrecs @kitteneddiediaz @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @coatedpanda16 @nicotinewrites @estheticpotaeto @babytrapperdiaz @snowviolettwhite @wikiangela

[heckmate]

Machine 47

I was able to find more information on Machine 47 thanks to a Russian Knock-knock VK group. One user stated that only IPL was bound by the non-disclosure agreement and that users can post freely about it, and thankfully one of the backers (who I will credit below) documented a lot about it!

Disclaimer: I do not speak Russian at all and everything I was able to learn was through Google translate. Sorry if anything was misinterpreted.

The gist: Machine 47 was a reward for the $47 tier on Kickstarter. It’s a 3D room consisting of a chair, a clock, and a book. The user is to write down a wish in the book and stamp it - the instructions were to write a wish centered on the self instead of others. Then, the user is to leave through the door.

Occasionally, the clock would speed up, but once the user wrote their wish down, the clock would stop. I think the clock also corresponded with the user’s PC time; I'm not sure how exactly this worked with the user's PC time and how it was able to keep corresponding with it...

I’m not sure what else it was supposed to do, sadly. I couldn’t find anymore info. However, thanks to VK user Ilya Batischev (Ilia Batishchev on YouTube) there is a video and also a file with instructions on how to use the Machine (I will put both under the read more) as well as a screenshot of the notebook in which the user was to put their wish:

Here is a screenshot of the notebook, translated from Russian by google translate (credit once more to Ilya Batischev):

(according to them, the 47 was a recreation of the stamp in MS paint ;D)

Lastly, here are the translated instructions. They come from a file called 47_RUS.rtf:

There are many things in the world that go beyond the natural order. Some miracles are created by human hands, and some happen by themselves. Sometimes it is difficult to understand exactly how: through intense effort, through a happy accident, or in some way beyond our understanding. Undoubtedly, the course of events can be influenced by human will. With our close attention we reveal hitherto invisible fragments of reality. Sometimes we are given the chance to consciously and responsibly choose what kind of world we would like to live in. If you want something sincerely and clearly state your will, reality will definitely respond. Before you is something like a wishing machine. She is made of equations, quanta, November leaves, chance and good will, and yes, she can make your wish come true. To do this, you need to carry out a simple ritual (guess the correct sequence of actions - in this case, this is the very necessary work). 1. Mathematics is responsible for accuracy, probability theory is responsible for randomness, but only human will can direct these forces in the right direction. Watch your thoughts and don't think that this is just some kind of joke. 2. Take your time. Composure is required for the machine to operate properly. We believe that desire must ripen there, inside. Be patient and the solution will definitely come. 3. Even the most powerful computer cannot do the internal work for you. Once you are in the machine, focus and formulate a desire. Write it and leave the room. Everything else will happen in reality. 4. Inside the machine you need to do three things. Which ones you will have to guess on your own, but here are the tips: Time, Word, Sensitivity. The machine may not know what you're doing, but someone is watching you and maybe seeing everything. There are several rules to follow when you formulate a wish. We don’t impose artificial restrictions, we’ve just experimented with it a little. We confidently declare that this is not a "monkey's paw": it will not burden your desire with evil and will not try to deceive you. But you still need to handle words carefully, so you should follow safety precautions: 1. Try not to be too vague. The machine will understand you if only you understand yourself. 2. Don't wish for anything that would affect other people's lives. It's better to focus on your own life. Only the strongest desires can change the destinies of others. 3. Do not wish for what you yourself, deep down in your soul, consider impossible. Establishing Eternal Peace or changing Planck's constant is a worthy goal, but it is unlikely that you will want it with all your heart. Otherwise, nothing will come of it. And please always be aware of the possible consequences. One way or another, try to be sincere and accurate. Then the Machine will serve you well. She has already helped us. And remember - the world consists of what you want to see in it.

(Note: Google Translate translated the word "machine" to "car" a few times, so I changed it back to machine)

All of this info can be found, in Russian, in the linked VK group--just search "47"!