#is actually kinda name of the species. it isn’t said anywhere that only women can be them but both of the forst sorceresses are women

[coward-draws]

Nara Nnasa

When the world was young, people lived in the darkness. Because of that, their hearts emitted fire.

All people were siblings to each other. That, or people knew only those who were their siblings, and didn’t know there were other people out there, who had no relation to them.

There were two brothers, one younger and one older.Was a sister, in age between them, and were younger sisters — so many, that one couldn’t count them all for the whole night. Once, the older brother died.

Not one of them knew death before, and death was sorrow to which nothing was more dreadful.

Middle sister couldn’t bear that. So she left, not remembering herself, far far away.

Younger brother couldn’t bear that. So he silenced himself forever.

Younger sisters had to bear that, because there were no one but them left. And they bore it with them. They took in their hands their silent brother, and they took in their hands their brother’s dead body, and they went as far high as they could. They stayed there, and their hearts continued to burn.

The older was buried with honor. His body became the sun. Of them all, his light is closest to the earth.

The younger was honoured in his solitude. His house became the moon. Sometimes he closes the window, and light ceases.

Younger sisters stayed. They became the stars. They have their houses. They come to them and go, and talk. They come farther and closer and their light becomes paler and brighter.

With learning to hear voices of the stars comes learning to feel a smell of a dead body.

Middle sister now wears a name of Sister of the Sun, because she herself said so, and because so said the stars. Because she didn’t choose them and their still living brother, but chose the dead one over them and left.

She is older than everyone in the world, but she is not the eldest of the sorceresses. Nara Nnasa is older than her, too.

[luci-cunt]

Hi, welcome to my open worm can, here’s me not being able to shut up Cureless and Cynical version @sargent-major-jane​ whyyyyyyy do youuuu doooo thiisss too meee aksdjfl;askdj XDD <33

Ok so first of all, here’s the cast: Izyc, a demon; Walter, a vampire; Lou a werewolf 6 year old

The story starts out with Walter summoning a demon (who happens to be Izyc) because he wants to bring his friend (Caine) back from the dead. Walt’s at this point basically a dumbass rich fratboy and him and Caine had this pretty not great friendship that was super co-dependant and toxic because Caine is not a good person. Anyways, Caine ends up dying, but the circumstances seem fishy because no one will talk to Walter about it so he gets the fantastic idea to bring Caine back from the dead. 

Izyc’s a little ass tho and he’s like “how do you want him?” and so Walter orders one supersized friend resurrection. 

“Alright,” Izyc said, cracking his knuckles and standing up, “which one is he?”

Walter pointed to Caine’s grave and Izyc walked over to stand in front of it. He scanned the grave stone, it was made of lacquered wood, with Caine’s name burned into it. “A wonderful son and friend with an honest soul, he will be missed.”

“Must be nice to have one of these,” Izyc remarked, more joking than wistful, “I think my parents buried me in a Payless box in the backyard.”

“Sorry,” Walter said, not sure what to say. 

Izyc just shrugged, “them’s the apples,” he said, which didn’t make sense to Walter but Izyc was moving on.

There’s just one problem with this whole thing, and that’s the fact that Caine does NOT want to be alive. The reason no one told Walter about Caine’s death in detail was because Caine killed himself, and now he’s back as a nearly unkillable monster. 

So Caine mauls the hell out of Walter’s arm and turns HIM into a vampire. 

Some details about vampires in this world: they’re nearly unkillable. The only thing that can kill them is another vampire. The sunlight thing is a myth, Walt is allergic to garlic tho. Also he’s got fangs, and has better senses. Oh and there’s a wrinkle: the vampiric disease can be transfered thru bodily fluids--I promise this will be important later XDD

Anywhoo--Walt’s a vampire now and he’s grouchy and grumpy about it. he goes all emo and the story flashes forward 7ish years to him sulking in a bar even though he can’t get drunk he just LiKeS tHe BuRn. 

this is where we find out Izyc has stuck around, and that him and Walter hunt monsters. Also that Izyc really likes his pair of jeans. 

Izyc cried out as he hit the ground, scrambling to hold onto something as the gnome dragged him down into the tunnels. His arms hit the sides of the tunnel and stopped him and he cursed. 

Walter was on him in a second, grabbing him by the coat as Izyc held onto his arms and pulled against the gnome. 

“Fucking– catch– fire!” Walter yelled, straining to pull Izyc out of the hole. 

“I like these jeans!” Izyc yelled back, “Ow! Shit!” he yelped, probably as the thing’s claws started digging in. 

Oh also: since Izyc is a demon he’s got some magic powers, most namely: the ability to set himself on fire, the ability to conjure anything in the world as long as he makes a deal, and an immunity to vampire sicknesss. 

Also also: these are gnomes in this universe (description courtesy of Izyc’s bestiology)

Surprisingly large, looks a bit like if a mole and a man decided to shit on god’s face by fucking. Claws for hands and pointy faces with milky eyes covered by big, bushy eyebrows. Does not wear clothing, which is a sight, and known for dragging unsuspecting women into their dens during mating seasons. The species is exclusively male and very reclusive/ meek. Will not inhabit anywhere within a mile of another gnome.

So.... moving on.... Izyc and Walt have an odd relationship, they travel around the US living out of hotels (specifically one that’s run by a man eating ghoul named Klancy who may or may not be 100 years old). 

Some details to know about demons: most of them were desperate people who sold their souls to other demons for something in their life. Then when they die they get stuck in this limbo and are basically hellish office workers. People can summon Izyc, but the only ritual most know just pokes at him and he can ignore it. It’s actually how him and Walt get jobs, someone summon’s Izyc and gives him details and then Walt and him zip on over. 

So Izyc’s got nothing better to do and Walt was his first ever deal so sue him, he’s lonely, he just kinda sticks with Walt. After a couple of years tho they start fucking, and both claim it’s for convenience sake--mostly Walt tho, cuz he can’t have sex with anyone who isn’t a vampire unless he wants to make them a vampire and -- yeah anyways.

Izyc catches feelings though, and he tries to pipe up about it, but then Lou crashes into the story. 

Some details to know about werewolves: they don’t only transform under the full moon, but that is a sacred time for them. They’re very ostracized by the world, forced to live in tiny communities and keep to themselves because they’re “dangerous.” 

One day, a vampire comes through and murders Lou’s entire pack

and the two other packs living in the town with them. 

Lou is the only survivor, and she’s friends with a woman named Luca who mentions a bitchy-but-nice vampire named Walter. 

And so Lou’s grieving 6 y/o brain goes “only a vampire can kill another vampire, this is perfect” and tracks Walt down and twists his heart strings until he agrees to at least check the scene out. 

Details about Luca: she’s Walter’s ex-boyfriend’s step-sister and she’s also half banshee. She’s also also one of Walter’s only friends. 

Some details about banshee’s: contrary to popular belief they aren’t omens of death, rather just really fucked up people. They’re usually the product of a hateful birth and feel emotion so strongly they’ll only be able to feel one single emotion in their lives. Usually people’s first emotions when their born is fear, and thus--screaming banshee’s. However, if you’re only part banshee you feel other emotions but they’re still super strong, so Luca’s basically cracked out bipolar. She takes meds that help but if she doesn’t take them it gets BAD.

Anyways, Walter goes to the crime scene, it goes a little like this: 

It started as splatters, dried and dirty looking on the ground. Then it got thicker, darker, and more concentrated. The walls of surrounding buildings were painted with it, and the street looked like it had been bathed in it. At the end of the street, however, was a schoolhouse, which seemed to be the source of all of it. 

Walter’s shiver had nothing to do with the cold. 

“Hey!” a voice called suddenly, stirring Walter out of where he’d been standing, staring at the school. It wasn’t very large, just a long, single story building that had a lot of windows and big doors. Above them were rusting metal letters spelling ‘SMITH CREEK ELEMENTARY.’ Most of the windows were broken and the doors had been torn off their hinges. The lawn in front of the school – which had probably been grass before – was now torn up and muddied from countless claws scrambling and tearing it up. 

“Hey!” The voice called again, this time closer, “you can’t be here.”

Walter turned to find a man walking up to him. He was wearing an officer’s uniform and his face was scrunched up in annoyance behind a big paper mask that covered his mouth and nose. Walter could smell lavender on it. The officer was also quite a bit shorter than Walter, and he had blond hair and crossed his arms over his chest as he looked at Walter. 

“I’m on business,” Walter said, “a consultant,” he lied. 

The officer gave him a shrewd look, “we didn’t hear anything about you coming up,” he said. 

Walter sighed, “it’s not my fault your department is useless.” The man’s face twitched. “I’m going back to work now, unless you want me to bother my superior and admit you messed up,” Walter said, brushing past the bristling man. 

“What kind of consultant are you supposed to be?” he asked, jogging a bit to catch up to Walter as he picked his way up to the school. There was a shallow set of stairs leading to the doors. The stairs were dark with blood and Walter almost expected them to be tacky. It had been days though, and they were dried by now. 

“Vampiric expert,” Walter said. 

“What are your credentials?” 

Walter turned and flashed his fangs. All the blood drained from the mans face and he took a few quick steps back. Walter didn’t stop walking, just tore through the caution tape blocking the doorway and went inside.

We find out later on that this is actually Caine’s doing, and Caine goes on a bit of the murder spree, which is what the book devolves into. Before it was some cases, a bunch of undocumented kishi (people with hyena faces on the backs of their heads) run into a wyvern problem that turns into a monster smuggling scandal. Izyc pisses off pirates which results in them kidnapping him to try and make Walt murder a bunch of mermaids, which just leads to the mermaids and Walt eating all the pirates. They meet another vampire named Marissa who happens to also be a warlock and zips them into a pocket dimension that’s like a 1950′s nuclear family where Izyc goes crazy, manages to escape, and then has to get into Walt’s pocket dimension and kill his alternate self.

yknow, the usual. 

This is so fucking long I’m so sorry if you managed to get all the way down here I owe you my whole soul aksjdf;lakjsdf;lkajsdf here’s some snippets: 

[sandyferal]

The Vacation part 4

This was starting to get to Megavolt a little bit.

Megavolt and Quackerjack were on a boat, one that was regularly used by tourists to get to and from Saint Canard without having to use the traffic-ridden bridge. They had snuck onboard by stealing tickets from two unsuspecting passengers who were luckily the same species as the two criminals. Now they were heading to one of the nearby cities, surrounded by happy passengers chatting about some mundane thing or the other.

But at the moment Megavolt was not exactly happy.

It was enough that anywhere he looked he could see miles of water, and the constant movement of the boat was beginning to make him a bit sick, and the sun was shining straight into his eyes, but Quackerjack’s incessant scratching was not helping.

“Will you stop that?” Megavolt asked

“Stop what?”

“Scratching your head, you’re making me itchy just looking at you.”

“I can’t help it,” Quackerjack pulled his hand away from his head and into a fist with visible effort. “Im not used to having my hat off, now my head’s all…” he made vague clawing motions around his scalp. “Itchy!”

“Yeah I know what you mean.” Megavolt tugged at his own clothes to hide the lightning shaped scars on his arm. “But there’s no way for us to be inconspicuous with you wearing that hat of yours.”

Quackerjack huffed. “You’d be surprised. A trench coat and a hat can do wonders.”

“On top of our normal clothes? In this weather?”

“Fair enough,” Quackerjack’s smile returned suddenly. “Oh, but I can’t wait to get back in my old clothes and wreak havoc in a new playground. Maybe the kids there will even have better taste in toys! Why didn’t I think of this before?”

“Well maybe for one,” Megavolt mumbled. “New city, unfamiliar streets, strangers everywhere. And crossing over all this water…” he looked down and shuddered slightly. “Not exactly my idea of a good time.”

“Aw c’mon, what’s wrong with new places?”

“I just don’t want to forget everything I left behind again,” Megavolt said quietly.

Quackerjack pulled the rodent closer to him. “Don’t be to down Sparky! You won’t forget anything while I’m here! And you know it, I can remind you of Saint Canard until you want to pull you hair out!”

“Ok, ok, don’t go overboard you loon.” Megavolt smiled. “I do have to admit it will be nice not to be cornered by Dipwing whenever I leave my hideout.”

“We can have nice long uninterrupted playdates without that nosy duck trying to but in!”

“No more ‘I am the terror that flaps in the night,’ or ‘I am the swimsuit that’s two sizes two small!’ Like geez, we get it, you’re all the most annoying parts of all our lives, do you have to announce it every time?”

“Ugh I know! Though it is nice of him to have an intro that’s long enough so we can have a decent warning.”

At that moment a large jet of water burst up from somewhere a few feet behind the boat only for the water to return to its normal mostly uninterrupted state only a few moments later.

“What are those two doing down there?” Megavolt asked.

“I don’t know,” Quackerjack said. “I don’t think I want to. Those two are so sappy.”

“Aren’t they though? Like geez do they have to be so-” Megavolt paused. “‘Sappy?’ Was that a pun?”

“You know it!”

Megavolt snickered. “You should say that to his face. I bet he’ll go beet red.”

“I will. Those two can’t leaf each other alone for one second.”

“I think you’ve gotten to the root of the problem.”

The two began to laugh harder as they continued making bad puns. Minutes later they were in hysterics on the floor and people were starting to stare. Megavolt was the first to recover.

“Y’know maybe this vacation is what I need,” he said. “I forgot how relaxing it can be to take a break from the whole crime-hiding-prison cycle.”

“But that’s part of the fun of being a villain! It’s all just part of the game!”

“It’s a game to you it’s just life to me. I never really got to have a normal life, with my own house, my own job my own money,” Megavolt said. Suddenly his eyes widened. “Oh shit!”

Quackerjack looked up. “What is it?”

“If we’re gonna hide that means we need to lay low for a while. We’re probably gonna need to actually get a place to sleep and food and stuff without committing any serious crimes.”

Quackerjack tilted his head. “But pickpocketing and stealing from purses isn’t a major crime is it? It’s not even really a crime if we can get away with it.”

The two looked around them at women decked out in fancy jewelry and men with nice wristwatches, and designer handbags and backpacks left practically unattended on nearby chairs.

Megavolt smiled. “I think you’re right Quacky. That wouldn’t draw too much attention.”

…

A couple dozen feet below the boat, in a large bubble of air within the water, Liquidator led Bushroot across the bay’s floor.

“Want to travel while remaining unseen?” Liquidator said. “Try going underwater! It may not be the most popular method of travel, but it certainly has a few perks!”

“It does,” Bushroot looked up at the shadow of the boat above them. “Though I can’t say I’d mind having a ride.”

“You want a ride? Say no more!” Liquidator dropped into a puddle. After sliding underneath Bushroot’s feet, he reformed, bringing Bushroot up with him in his arms. “The Liquidator is happy to allow you to ride me any time, free of charge!”

“Oh Buddy, such a gentleman,” Bushroot said with a small laugh. “Thanks.”

“Well it is exactly what you wanted isn’t it? You know you can just ask for things directly right? I don’t sell everything, favors for my partner in crime will never come with a price!”

“Oh of course I know that,” Bushroot said. “I wasn’t trying to ask for that exactly I was just…” he sighed. “Nevermind. I appreciate it Buddy.”

“No, no, no, if you have a complaint with my services I want to hear it!” Liquidator insisted.

“It’s not a complaint with anything about you! It’s just w-well, it bugs me a bit that those two get to be up there, and we have to hide away down here.”

“And what’s wrong with being down here?” Liquidator sound offended, but it was hard to tell if it was genuine or just for show. “Do you not enjoy spending some alone time with your favorite puddle puppy?”

“No, no, that’s not it!” Bushroot pulled himself closer to Liquidator. “It’s not that-that I don’t enjoy spending alone time with you. B-but sometimes I miss… being around o-other people.” He shot a quick glance at his own body. “Because I’m not… normal.”

Liquidator tilted his head. “Would you say that this method of travel is normal?”

“No.”

“But look around you,” Liquidator gestured to the water around them. Above them the light could seen shining on the water's surface, and around them fish and underwater plants were visible. “I don’t know about you but I think this is a pretty nice view.”

“Yeah…”

“Do you think I’m normal?”

“Well, y-you-”

“Of course I’m not!” Liquidator interrupted. “But you like me don’t you?”

“Y-Yes! I do! Of course I like you!”

“Well then, not to sound cliche, but being normal is very overrated! The people up there are missing out on wonderful and fascinating things like you and me, though they still get to deal with Megavolt and Quackerjack.” Liquidator smirked. “And if you ask me, those two, while I enjoy their company, can be trouble. Sanity-wise their normality is a bit questionable.”

Bushroot chuckled. “Well, you can say that again. They are a bit much to deal with.”

“Besides Reggie, the reason we need to hide isn’t entirely to do with being normal. It’s partly to do with the fact that we’re criminals.”

“Oh yeah. I kinda forgot.”

“You may forget, unfortunately, the law enforcement does not,” Liquidator said. “But all that aside, is it really that bad to be stuck down here with me?”

“No. I will admit, I’ve never been able to see underwater plants this close. So that kinda nice.”

“See! I told you this method of travel has its perks.”

“Uh, Buddy?”

“Yes?” Liquidator purred.

“Did you call yourself ‘puddle puppy’ earlier?”

“Uhh…” Liquidator gave a rare embarrassed smile. “I was looking for alliteration and that just… came out.”

“Can I call you that?” Bushroot asked with a grin.

Liquidator laughed. “Absolutely not! You know our toy-enthused friend or either of those pesky masked mallards would never let me hear the end of it if you said that in front of one of them.”

“What about when we’re alone?”

“The answer is still no!”

“Aw c’mon…”

Liquidator let out a sigh, though his smile had not disappeared. “Okay, maybe occasionally, when we’re completely alone. But be careful Reggie, if you want to get into the embarrassing pet names game. I’ve been playing it much longer than you have.”

Bushroot began to turn pink. “Ok! I understand! I’ll keep that in mind.”