#ironically i was thinking about my old jojo ask blogs the other day but i really dont think im gonna continue em.

[bubbleman-caesarino]

You coming back yet bud?

[[it has been five years my guy]]

[yanderememes]

can you hit me up with that dollification hc for the jojos. i just found this blog today and i'm chugging all of the yandere jojo juice

Welcome to yandere jojo hell, anon 😈

I think dollification in the yandere verse is so interesting so idk why ppl don't talk about it more 🙃

I'll do parts 1 to 5 cuz of the stupid word limit on Tumblr asks 😑

Warnings: dollification, noncon

Jonathan

Jonathan would feel the most guilty out of all Jojos that darling became doll-like

He never meant to break them! He just wanted to love them with all his heart!

He'd do everything in his power to fix it. To try and get darling back to normal and feel something. Anything!

He'll hire the best doctors in England to see you. Maybe they can help and get you back to normal?

But the doctors don't know what to do. This is something they haven't seen before. They can't help.

I can see Jonathan falling into a deep depression. He wouldn't be able to sleep at night cuz of the guilt. It's eating him alive and eating his sanity

If he was paranoid about darling's safety before, then he sure has major anxiety about it now. Darling is too vulnerable now. They're fragile. Jonathan's overbearing and protective nature is heightened to the max

This is ironic because that's exactly what turned darling in the first place

He'll help you with everything. From being dressed in the morning and feeding you. But in the darkest recesses of his mind, he can't deny that he somewhat enjoys it. It feels... Nice. To take care of darling like this and give all his undying love with no fear of holding back.

NO. That's wrong to think, Jonathan chastises himself. He has to fix darling if it's the last thing he does.

"don't worry, my love. I'll bring you back to normal. I promise. I love you."

Joseph

Would be weirded out to have a dollified darling

He doesn't understand how it happened. Or maybe he does. But he doesn't give it much thought

He finds it boring that you've become this way. You don't react at all. Say nothing at all. Where's all the fun?

Joseph takes advantage of dollified darling when he's horny but even then, his fun is ruined because they don't react to his touch

He feels slight regret for what he'd done to his darling but plays it off as a joke. Thinking you're just messing with him

"Alright, y/n, you got me. Now stop it"

It's not until you remain unresponsive does he realize the severity of his actions

Jotaro

He's not entirely sure how to feel about it

Jotaro is 50/50 on it. He likes that you're quiet and does as he says. But he knows he's the reason why you turned this way. Are you even human anymore?

He'll take advantage of doll darling in the day to day life. So things like eating together, sleeping together and waking up together

He likes that you don't disturb him while he's working and you're sitting neatly in his lap

But there are hints and moments in his life where he misses the old you. The one he fell in love with and became this obsessive because of you

He'd try to use Star Platinum and analyze what he could do. Maybe it's something like Dio's flesh buds he can pick out and you'll go back to normal?

Star Platinum can't find anything. He feels hurt but accepts his new reality. Jotaro will make the most out of his new situation with dollified darling

Josuke

Probably the most accepting of dollified darling out of all the Jojos

From experience, he knows that there are some things not even Crazy Diamond can fix. A dollified darling being one of them

It would bother him only for a little while but he'd get over it quickly when he learns how receptive darling has become

He loves that he can shower them with his affections. He doesn't have to get violent anymore!

Josuke will drag you outside more and you'll go on dates. He won't have to worry about you screaming for help or talking to others

You're officially his. His darling.

Giorno

Giorno would see the pros and cons to having a dollified darling

On the bright side, they don't fight back anymore or say cruel things to him. If they're like this then they won't try to escape anymore and he can protect them in his villa

He also likes pampering them. Brushing their hair, dressing them up, holding their hand everywhere, all sorts of things like that. Giorno is someone who always wanted to be a provider for darling, but had to constantly hold back because you hated it. Now with the appearance of dollified darling, he doesn't have to hold back on spoiling you anymore (you were already spoiled enough but now its 10x worse)

But he's heartbroken. Maybe just as much as Jonathan. He just wants a loving relationship with darling like the couples he sees when walking around in Italy

Unlike the other Jojos, Giorno wouldn't take sexual advantage of darling while they're in this state. The most he would do is cuddle.

He would contact doctors who could help darling but if push comes to shove, then he's gonna use GER and reset the time when darling wasn't like this

[arbitrarygreay]

Morning Musume NYC 2018, Saturday

Saturday was concert day, and I was determined to get on the railing. Since merch was sold at the con, the concert venue line wouldn't be split between merch and standing position, either. In the past, the line would be at the end of the block by 7AM, so we got to the building at 6AM, only to discover that people had still gotten there at 5AM. Thankfully, we were within the first 20 or so again. But, perhaps because it was shared concert, or because there had already been a lot of interaction with the girls the day before, there were shockingly few people who chose to camp the line. As always, camping an entire day for a concert is actually pretty fun, as everyone in line is there for the same reason, so there's little awkwardness in talking. As this was my third time for MM already, there were several people we knew from previous events, too. We interacted with the Japanese fans quite a bit. One of them was giving out A Gonna/Are You Happy CDs, as well as old member uchiwas. Importantly, the J-fen dished that while camping they airport, they noticed that Maria arrived from a flight from San Francisco, rather than with the rest of the group from Japan. The implication of this is a photobook shoot. One of my proudest accomplishments for this weekend was that I asked the Japanese fans if I could plug in my music player into their speaker, and then proceeded to play a bunch of mashups. It was hilarious seeing the reactions, as people further away in the line could also hear the music, and their surprise at every reveal and transition was great. I also had several people ask me to send them the links of where I found these mashups. I played around with the idea of also camping the stage door entrance to catch the guests entering the building for sound checks, but with no luck all morning, so I gave up. So, of course, as I did a jog around the building later to warm myself up, I caught Kitadani entering the building, hah. The entrance into the building was quite frustrating. They opened two doors, and both had both bag checks and metal detectors. So many people behind us got ahead because the bag checker for their door was more lax, and I also had to wreck my item organization in order to get all of the metal stuff out of my pockets (phone, music player, keys, etc.) Secondly, you were supposed to pick up your VIP badge before entering the venue, and they weren't taking it on faith that the ticket with the barcode was the real deal, so I had to dig through my email archive to find a record with the price paid on it, in order to get my badge, and the switch back to the ticket itself to scan into the concert hall. I definitely entered later than my place in the line had been. Again, thankfully, I still made it to the railing. We waited for an hour for the concert from that point, and the music playlist in the hall was all Lantis, no UFA. Boo. Was amusing when Country Roads came up once, though (as Kageyama had covered it once). I also discovered that VIP included a handshake-ish event, so I started actually thinking of what to say to the girls, unlike with the autograph session. It was funny, all of us MM fans were hoping that one of the collabs would be USA, while none of the anisong fans even knew what that was. One of them even though Da Pump was a Kpop band. The concert itself was fun. Most of VIP was MM fans, but there were just enough anisong fans to show how excited they were about the setlist from those artists. Us MM fans did our best to make every guest feel welcome, though. The concert ended up being between 3 and 4 hours. The other three guests performed about half an hour each, while MM got a full hour, though they did not perform last. There were also multiple collaboration songs between the guests. MM were great, of course. It was hilarious, one anisong fan said that she only vaguely knew MM through their Golden Age songs, and was completely bowled over at the new Kpopified version before her. A downside to this, though, is that few of MM's modern songs lend themselves to tradition lightstick patterns, so our movements during MM's set may have, ironically, been less organized than for the anisongs. But we made up for it in enthusiasm, singing along, and screaming our voices out at every opportunity. Abs watch was too good, but the real story was hair watch, and it was all fab. The girls repeated the introduction style of giving their names and favorite anime. Honey changed her choice to Jojo's, while Maa said just Disney instead of Disney Channel. I'd say that Maria got the best intro screams of the night. Eripon flubbed her line and we started an "eeeeehhh" and she was really ticked off, lol. During Cha La Head Cha La, Maa forgot where she was supposed to be in the line, and Sakura had to correct her. I went for yellow and white lights, for Honey and Chii. My setlist prediction was a bit of a wash. They did both songs from the single, NO SATURDAY NIGHT BOOOOOOOOOOO, no How Do You Like This Japan (as their jumping choice of song for the night was What is Love), and no Jerajera ;_;. All in all, though, it was a great time. No matter the song choice, the girls were going to give a great performance, and they did. Notably, there was no big concert screen, or any steadicams in the press pit. This indicates that there won't be a regular DVD release of this concert (the licensing for the other artists was probably too onerous). A big side effect of this, though, was that for anyone not so close to the stage, the solo performances weren't so exciting as the girls' formation dancing. At the end of the concert, we started a Harunan chant and a yellow ocean. Pretty sure we really ticked off the anisong fans at the point, lol. Some of them though we were trying for an encore. Honey blogged the next day that she heard it all way on the third floor, and later she had a few pictures with the other guests where she was holding one of the yellow glowsticks that had been passed out to help facilitate the yellow ocean. After all of the non-VIPs had exited the building, they set up the tables for us to high five all of the guests. The non-MM's went first, and then the girls went in reverse-seniority order. I AM SO GLAD I REHEARSED WHAT TO SAY, and it was complete and utter success. I both fist bumped and high fived the non-MMs. Gave a "Country Saikou!" to Chii, a "Yo Bonito Queen" to Yokoyan, who was really tired at the point, kind of froze on Dii, sorry. I was planning on asking if she had bought a Gunpla, if it was a handshake, but that would be weird for a high-five setting. I did a mustache twirl for Maria, which made her laugh, and then I was like pretty much about to freeze for the rest of the girls when my friend and I both all but accosted Maria with questions about if she was in San Francisco or not. She said yes, but in that setting she might have said yes to anything. But it carried me through Chel, Sakura, and Maa with us just telling them we came from San Fran and that they should perform there, so that kind of saved me from freezing. I told Ayumi "meccha kirei," and my friend did a "Snefuru kakkoi," told Honey "omedetou," gave Eripon a "yo subleader!" and saluted Fukuchan as leader. She saluted back! And then the high five line was done, a complete and utter success, with an autographed poster to finish it all off. It was magical. Best interaction line I've ever had. (Also, since it was explicitly a high-five line, all of the girls gave great high fives unlike Angerme.) We then headed to the stage door, and the security there was gracious enough to set up a railing to clearly delineate where we could stand, and it was hella close to the door, too. The downside was that we were originally going to sing Saturday Night to them, but then they told us all to put our phones away, so we couldn't look at lyrics, and that part fizzled. But we gave "Otskaresama deshitas" to the various Staff and the other guests. The girls were in two separate vans, sorted by age and gen. Maa looked like a complete diva, wearing a diamond-patterned fur coat, a hat, and sunglasses, swaggering to the van. Meanwhile, Eripon was like in a full head wrap, with just her eyes visible. None of them were as pro as Angerme's stage door exit, though, none filmed with their phones or did Dawa's genius phone flashlight in the van move. I tried dancing Saturday night a bit, but it probably just looked like more Furari Ginza dabbing, lol. There was both an afterparty hosted by the J-fen and a locally hosted karaoke session, but we declined both to grab dinner with some of the new friends we had made, and then headed to bed.

[remotecontrolchuck]

Toonami Night Review: Pop Team Epic Debuts on the Block!

Last week’s run was quite a ride, going crazy in the beginning while winding down in the end. And while I wasn’t able to see the entire run because of a bad headache at the time, I stuck around until the new and ongoing shows ended, and the old repeated shows began which I have already seen and talked about. But I digress, last week was the premiere of Pop Team Epic, an anime that many have compared to Adult Swim’s Robot Chicken, and it’s not hard to see why considering the amount of pop culture they referenced and parodied!

So far some of the other live bloggers I follow liked the new addition, while others not so much. As for me, I liked Pop Team Epic and found it hilarious, though hard to live blog about with its fast paced humor and sketches. And along with the quick jokes, hearing voice actors portray Popuko and Pipimi differently and in their own way was far more entertaining. In the first episode it was Ian Sinclair and Christopher Sabat voicing the two rude and crude, and then Justin Briner and Colleen Clinkenbeard in the second half, all of which were both fantastic and funny as hell!

I could go on about the new show, but I want to keep this review from being too long. Moving on to the next topic about last week’s run, the penultimate episode of FLCL Progressive! And boy did things escalate like crazy! From an amusement park turned into a giant robot to fight Medical Mechanica’s giant iron, to Haruko getting pregnant and cranking the insanity to eleven, which of course resulted in Hidomi overflowing and becoming a terminator on her ass. Again, so much to say, no idea how the hell to summarize it all in short.

Onto the third and final topic, we continued on with the new long running shows. My Hero Academia concluding an excellent but dramatic day of school, with the villains making an appearance in the ending credits. Was wondering when they were going to show up, can’t have a bunch of heroes without some foes for them to fight! And from our other recent addition, Black Clover, gave up some laughs in its latest episode on the block, involving a dating event going not so smoothly. And lastly, while we get ever closer to the end of Stardust Crusaders, it’s been recently announced that Diamond is Unbreakable will be coming to the block once the former finishes it run.

Yep, that’s right! Along with Vento Aureo getting an anime adaption, Part 5 of JoJo’s Bizarre adventure will be coming to the block in August! Perfect timing for when Stardust Crusaders ends, and giving us another long running series on the block, which gives time for Part 6 to be completed and then dubbed in the coming years. In other words, JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure will be on the block for a good long time, and we couldn’t be any happier about it. Gotta love it when things work out well!

Well now that I’m done with discussing the major points of last week’s run, it’s time to wrap this review up with the recap of last week’s show!

On Dragon Ball Super, Goku and Vegeta end up facing a new challenger in episode’s guest star, the early 80′s gag manga robot girl Arale! Long story short, she easily defeats Vegeta, and gives Goku a run for his Zeni! In My Hero Academia, Deku recovers from his injuries and makes new friends, while Bakugo’s ego takes a bruising after seeing his classmates’ quirks. And then in FLCL Progressive, it’s an insane trip to the amusement park, where it takes us all on a ride to the climax! 

The resistance group Marurao, Eye Patch, and Tonkichi are part of make their move, using all the students and visitors to collect N.O. energy to power up the park and turn into a giant weapons platform against Medical Mechanica’s giant iron. Unfortunately it doesn’t seem to have much effect on it. Meanwhile, Hidomi overflows once again, transforming into a monster/robot, while Ide gets turned into a deflated human shape balloon with speakers. 

Oh, and after inflating and going into space, Ide gets picked up in a space station where he gets eaten by an alive again Canti. While whether or not Ide’s dead or not is left for debate, at least Canti’s alive again, and as a sort of robot puppy to boot! And last but not least, Haruko’s continues to bring the madness, even while pregnant! Oh, and Atomsk shows up at the end of the episode... WAIT, WHAT?!

Yeah, so while we tried to take all this in, we had a nice comedic break with the premiere of Pop Team Epic! Unfortunately like I said before, it was all too fast paced to explain, so like Popuko I’ll just ask “Are you upset?”. Joke aside, our feels then went on a bizarre adventure with Stardust Crusaders! And oh man did shit hit the fan in this one! After figuring out younger D’Arby’s Stand’s abilities, Jotaro beats him in his own game, or rather him and his grandpa! Apparently Old Man Joestar was at the controls the entire time, while Jotaro fooled D’Arby into thinking he was facing him. Anyway, Kakyoin gets his soul back, and Jotaro’s Star Platinum gives D’Arby some good old ORAORAORA! 

However despite this battle being one, another one begins soon after, and already a crusader has died. That being Avdol again, but apparently for real this time thanks to DIO’s loyal and deadly assassin VANILLA IC- er, I mean COOL ICE and his deadly void Stand CREAM! (Like some of the others, his name had to be changed for the English dub). With Avdol reduced to just a pair of dismembered arms, Polnareff and Iggy are left to face DIO’s most loyal and deadly assassin!

As we tried to recover our feels once again, we dove right into Hunter x Hunter, where our feels also took a plunge near the end. After sparing Ikalgo’s life, Killua soon finds himself in another battle with Chimera Ants, this time the fishy humanoid Ortho Siblings! And to make their point across, they use dart-like Nen to hit Killua repeatedly like a game of Darts! However, Killua gets the better of then and rips them to shreds. But after losing a lot of blood, the young Zoldyck is on the verge of death. Fortunately, Ikalgo arrives to rescue him, and the octopus-like Chimera Ant rushes to take him to a hospital. Meanwhile, Gon has lunch with the chameleon-like Chimera Ant, Meleoron.

Moving on to Black Clover, we watch Finral take Asta and Luck to a mixer party with some girls, though it doesn’t go well. While Asta did have a good time with one of the girls and become friends, things between Finral and Luck and their dates didn’t work out. Also Noelle was hilarious when stalking Asta during the mixer! After that we jumped back into Naruto Shippuden, as “Madara” took care of Danzo’s bodyguards, before bringing forth Sasuke to fight the man himself. Oh, and meanwhile Sai delivers the news to Kakashi about the Five Kage Summit, and their decision to promote him Hokage!

After that, Space Dandy dies and goes on a somber journey on Planet Limbo, meeting all sorts of bizarre ghosts and a lonely girl named Poe. Then in Cowboy Bebop, Faye cleans out the Bebop’s safe and runs off to Jupiter’s moon of Callisto where she meets a sax player named Gren, with a secret and a grudge against Vicious. And speaking of Vicious, Spike soon confronts him while looking for Julia on Callista, and is left lying on the snow after being shot by Lin. The Toonami run then ends with Lupin the Third, with Fujiko Mine stealing the spotlight in the end, as well as our hearts!

And that’s it for the recap, as well as this review. While longer than my usual Toonami Night Review, but enjoyable to write nonetheless. Tonight we start the next run of Toonami, and I can only imagine the feels and excitement that awaits us, especially with the finale of FLCL Progressive! Just how will it end? WHO KNOWS! Anything goes when it comes to FLCL, so leave your expectations behind, and prepare yourself for a wild ride!

Until tonight’s run, see you guys later and Stay Gold!

[comebeonetwothree]

Blog #6: Coast to Coast

6/29/2021

The homeland of the rich, the famous, and the homeless junkies of Los Angeles, California will always have my heart.

With my first near death experience, I have come to see life in a new light… YOLO!

Remember that term? Yah, it was one of those fads that had meaning to it but no longer holds a place in fashion... thank god.

Everything on this coast is slow, even the way people talk is dragged out. No one J-walks here. They seriously wait for that little white man to pop up on the cross walks before walking, even if there is not a car in sight.

Yet everyone here has a serious addition to coffee.

Hangovers are even more dragged because everyone is so uber healthy here, they straight up do not have greasy food.

I made the mistake of ordering an egg and cheese, knowing it’ll only be a disappointment compared to a New York BEC. It was beyond disappointing, especially being hungover as fuck.

Everyone here is stoned all the time and have been for years. I truly believe the whole city moves so slow because everyone is high all the time.

No wonder they can survive with the shitty food- they are too high to realize.

They do have some fire weed here, so it makes sense, but damn… they are so slow and ditsy.

There is so much art here, from music, to painting, to theater, to creativity, everyone comes here with a dream. Some make their dreams come true, others end up addicted to crack, but everyone originally came here in hopes of making something of themselves.

That energy runs through the streets, it is so lively and so filled with hope. It is truly an inspiring place to live.

Who

Who have you become…

The people on the west coast are just genuinely nicer. We had a conversation that consisted of outrageous hand gestures with a random man in his car.

He had blocked an intersection accidently so I couldn’t make a left turn, where he then proceeded to see me raging about it and trying to mouth to us how sorry he was. We straight up had a conversation with this guy and were joking around while waiting for the light. We left mouthing, “We are from New Yorkk, move outta the way” as a joke, and he just understood and left us with a peace sign.

There is a surplus of homelessness here, and it is sad to see but also so interesting to watch them set up communities on the sides of highways and all along the beach.

There is never just one homeless dude posted up under a cardboard box. It’s always 15+ people posting up together in nice ass tents they probably stole or making cardboard houses with tarps for extra coverage.

They get super creative with their homelessness; it is fascinating to watch.

This one guy was zipping down the road in what looked like a decked-out bike, with high handlebars and a motor. He was moving with traffic and was looking cool while doing it.

As he got closer, we realized his get-up was made from an ironing board he bent into a seat, a plastic crate holding up the ironing board to a lime scooter he probably stole a month prior. Topping it off, he added tall handlebars for that 70s badass look. That man mastered one man’s trash, into another man’s treasure.

The saddest part is knowing majority of them came out here looking for their big break and got so hooked on drugs, they could never make it farther then that last $10 in their pocket for drugs.

On the other hand, some of these people have money to their names, but choose this lifestyle.

They really enjoy the life of nothing. This one woman was offered a job and a home, and she politely turned it down because this was her home. She loved the community around her and wouldn’t trade it for any material. What a way of life.

My family was so generous to let us three, stay with them here in Venice Beach. My Uncle Greg is my mom’s brother. He moved out here with his family to further his comedic career. Unfortunately, that meant I couldn’t see my cousins often.

My cousin Owen is a year younger than me and in the same grade as my brother. My other cousin Jojo is four years younger but grew up so fast. I always said the water in California was cracked out, because she always appeared older than my brother and I.

Since COVID I hadn’t been able to see them in two years, so I was so excited to hang out with them.

Jojo just graduated high school, so she is finally old enough to do drugs with!!

We also got to meet up with our friend Izzy from Oneonta. She is living out here for the summer with her sister. What a life.

Izzy is thriving here with her job at this night club and is living in her sister’s cute ass apartment in Echo Park. She has the total LA vibe and even knows all the local spots to hang. Shout out to you for sneaking us into a random hotel’s rooftop pool! Confidence never gets questioned.

We love meeting up with friends from school, it makes the trip feel more homie.

What

What’s hanging dude…

Joshua Tree National Park was something out of another planet. It seriously looked like Jurassic Park and a dinosaur should be appearing at any second.

It was very different from anything we had ever seen before, but it was still a desert and was hot as fuck.

We did some gorgeous hikes through all the massively large, rounded rocks that somehow were placed on top of each other ages ago.

The trees that are all around are Joshua Trees, also considered Trees of Life.

This means they produce a way of life for other creatures at all stages of its growing/dying process.

While in beginning stages of its life, Yucca moths use the trees pollen to lay their eggs in and produce pollen scatter, creating more trees. When the trees are gown, the caterpillars use the tree for habitats and provides food sourcing for a lot of other desert species. When the tree dies, the bark is used to create habitats for humans and used to wove baskets and other materials.

These trees look like a palm tree and a cactus went to TOWN together.

Los Angeles is the other city of dreams. It is not comparable to New York City besides the homelessness and the traffic.

The Ocean really makes the whole city’s surfer aesthetic. Everyone, even the rich and famous, dress like they are in last weeks outfit.

The style is so different from New York. People really don’t dress to impress but spend half their life savings on their wardrobe.

Visiting my family here has always been the ideal way to do this city, since they take us to all the local shops, and we do fun activities like surfing. It’s not just another tour bus showing us where Kurt Cobain shot up some heroin for the first time.

They also show us the best food joints. We got these sushi balls, and it was the greatest -post beach snack- imaginable. A little hit of the wax pen and a bite of this ball is comparable to an orgasm.

Where

Where are all the famous people…

Joshua Tree was so beautiful, it is a place I will be re-visiting, considering we were only there for one night.

Los Angeles is where I have always wanted to live, ever since a young girl. Whenever we would come out here to visit my uncle, he would take us to the coolest places, and we would meet the coolest people.

One year I was here on my birthday, and his buddy stopped over to say hi, when I came downstairs in was Zach Galifianakis chilling there with a $20 bill and my name on it as a birthday gift.

You could imagine my teenage self shitting a tiny bit in my pants as he handed me $20… However, in my head I was thinking, “I know you’re rich, give me more you cheap fuck.”

This year for graduation I only got a phone call from him… how rude.

My Uncle is a popular comedian, if you know him you know him, but if you don’t, he is very irrelevant to you.

When we arrived, he took us out to a show he was preforming at in West Hollywood, featuring other comedians you might know or might also be very irrelevant, including Bill Burr, Anthony Jeselnik, Pete Holmes and Beth Stelling.

It was a cool venue, and a fun time. My favorite part was being called out for attempted DUI’s in every state we have been in due to my funneling addiction, thanks Uncle Greg, that was supposed to be a secret.

After the show he dropped us off at this bar that his friends said was the “it” spot. When we walked in, the bar itself was perfect, expect it was populated by older rich men trying to find their next sugar baby.

We had some contenders, but they were asking for too much… No, I don’t want to go back to your house and sneak past your wife and kids as we dart to your hot tub.

When

When will we leave…

When we first got to LA we had full intensions of staying only four nights and getting out of my family’s hair, but then plans fell through.

Because I love it here so much, we decided to stay!!

Just kidding, I wish we could stay longer… One day I’ll move out here though.

COVID restrictions are back at it again, ruining our plans of going Yosemite. They are the only National Park that requires a whole ass separate pass just to enter the park, on top of the $30 day pass we already have.

The only reason our route was heading inland California was to see that park. So, we did a little digging and decided to just send it up all the way up the coast and do the legendary Pacific Coast Highway.

This is what we originally wanted to do before we found out about Yosemite. Guess we will have to come back to see the park, aw shucks!

Why

Why can’t I afford this…

California is fucking expensive; I can see why the population of homelessness is so high… Even gas is $1.00 more than it is back in New York.

And for Why? They are on a coast, it’s not like the desert where there is a gas station every 100 miles.

They know people here have the money, so they overprice literally everything. A fucking water bottle is $7.00. Sorry didn’t realize paying for survival would be this expensive.

The older man at the bar loved to throw the fact he had money around (as do most people with money around here). He kept saying he works on wall street, but wall street is literally a street in New York City.

He just wanted to flex he works in finances and has a hot tub, okay we get it you have a small dick.

How

How we almost died…

This is my favorite part of the last week, but also the most traumatizing.

So, have you ever heard of cowboy camping?

Well, neither had we until our friend that had just camped in Joshua Tree told us about it and how legendary it was in that specific spot.

Cowboy camping: you don’t pitch your tent, you just post up with your sleeping bags under the stars.

Since Joshua Tree is known for their stars, we thought fuck it, we are here for less than 12 hours, the weather is perfect let’s do it.

That night was a full moon, and it was a killer sunset (all pun intended). We cooked up a nice rice bowl for dinner and then laid in our sleeping bags watching the stars.

The moon was almost too bright, it was taking away from the illumination of the stars, but it was legendary because I’ve never seen such a big and bright moon before.

But you know what they say about the full moons, it brings out the crazies. And in our case, coyote crazies.

After drifting off to sleep under the peaceful star and moon lit sky, I was rudely woken up to really loud growling and whimpering.

It was not something that was off in the distance, it was right next to us… barebone in the wild.

I quickly and quietly turned over to grab my bear spray that I keep next to me when camping. I started thinking, “Alright this is the only thing keeping me from getting mauled by whatever the fuck is next to me.”

Not knowing what we were dealing with, I slowly popped my head up hoping the animal didn’t catch my movement… I saw about 5 feet in front of us was a pack of about 10 coyotes, running around chasing animals.

We happen to be the center of their circle and were surrounded by their pack. Thankfully their attention was diverted to our asshole neighbor’s whose food was left out. Thanks for that.

We just laid their paralyzed in fear of death. As we laid there, I saw two shooting stars and wished for life… Shoutout to those shooting stars.

We tried to stay as quiet as possible, so we didn’t become their next victim. Maya was not having it though and couldn’t stop shaking. There was a moment when her shaking was so loud, and I could see a coyote right next to us, so I had to hold her body so it would stop moving.

We laid there for about 20 minutes until the noises stopped… then we booked it for the car. We slept in the car until the sun rose.

As the sun was rising all the coyotes simultaneously howled for the rest of the pack to meet up and disappear before daylight. That was one of those, “holy shit that was the coolest most terrifying moments of my life”, moments.

We left the next morning as fast as possible, running on no sleep and fear… we headed for the city. I had never been more grateful to be in a city.

[goldenshowerrequiem]

Ooh, I got tagged by @shsl-gangster to do a thing. Looks like it’s time to post something about myself rather than a JoJo meme for once.

Rules: Bold those statements that are true for you (but I’m probably gonna be all extra and add more info). Tag 9 people you’d like to know better. APPEARANCE I am 5′7″ or taller (damnit I’m like 5′6.5″) I wear glasses I have at least one tattoo (nope, that shit terrifies me) I have blond hair (dark blond now, used to be lighter) I have brown eyes (I don’t even know what colour my eyes are, sort of greenish-grey I guess?) I have short hair (eh, kinda average length for a dude) My abs are at least somewhat defined ( I wish, getting there tho. I can dream) I have or have had braces. PERSONALITY I love meeting people People tell me that I’m funny (sarcastically most of the time) Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me (it depends on the problem but I like to think I’ve been helpful on a number of occasions) I enjoy physical challenges (I held my breath for like 2 minutes once out of water, proudest achievement of my life) I enjoy mental challenges I’m playfully rude with people I know well (I’m far meaner to my friends than anyone else, but it’s a mutual thing) I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it There’s something I’d change about my personality (I’d love to not be lazy) ABILITY I can sing well I can play an instrument I can do over 30 push-ups without stopping (Had to check before answering this one) I’m a fast runner I can draw well (I really wish I could but I’m too lazy/busy to try at the moment) I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head (no clue if I’m better than average at this or not) I can’t hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people on arm wrestling (I think so at least) I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch (I’m not exactly great at it but I enjoy cooking) I know how to throw a proper punch (I’d like to think so, but I’m sure a martial artist would tell me otherwise) 

HOBBIES I enjoy playing sports (only some sports tho, swimming being my favourite) I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else I’ve learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months (ngl I hate running) I have drawn something in the past month I enjoy writing (kinda? I guess. I like writing a lot about my favourite series online but I’m more of a thinker and a talker than a writer) FANDOMS ARE MY #1 PASSION (idk for this one, but I definitely like getting involved in them) I do or have done martial arts (a long time ago)

EXPERIENCE I have had my first kiss (It’ll happen someday... hopefully) I have had alcohol (like twice) I have scored the winning goal in sports game (I mean I probably have at least once but I don’t remember) I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting (again, I probably have but I don’t remember) I have been at an overnight event I have been in a taxi (like once but It wasn’t even a proper taxi ride) I have been in the hospital or ER in the past years (general anaesthetic is fun) I have beaten a video game in one day (too many) I have visited another country (went to the Netherlands once, loved it) I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts (don’t really have a favourite band) RELATIONSHIPS I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships I have never been in a relationship (I mean I was kinda in a relationship once but not really) I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year I have had feelings for a friend

(people have told me that I might be “aromantic” before, but idk. Most people on here probably know a lot more about that kind of stuff than I do)

MY LIFE I have at least one person I consider a best friend I live close to my school (HA, I wish) My parents are still together I have at least one sibling I lived in the United States (I’m a Brit) There’s snow right now where I live (not the Scottish kind of Brit) I have hung out with a friend in the past month I have a smartphone I have at least 15 CDs (don’t own any) I share my room with someone RANDOM SHIT I have breakdanced I know a person named Jamie (well this is oddly specific) I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce (sorry French people but I really struggle with your names (and language in general)) I have dyed my hair I’m listening to a song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the last week (not seriously tho) I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone (I have lucked my way through life so far, hopefully this will continue to be the case) I know what I want to do with my life (at least for the next few years)  I have eaten a waffle today (I’d love to eat a waffle but I’m being tested for a wheat allergy at the moment and it’s hell) I speak at least 2 languages (I got a B in GCSE German, that’s about as close to speaking another language as I get) I have made a new friend in the past year (a bunch of ‘em)

This made me realise that I really haven’t said much about myself on this blog. I probably should. I’m 17 years old, male, straight, and I like JoJo (as you probably know), The Elder Scrolls (I’m a huge nerd for this one), Dragon Ball, Danganronpa, Pokemon, Halo, Mount and Blade and a bunch of other games/anime. Other than that, I’m into science (particularly microbiology, zoology and food science) and history (especially ancient history and Mesoamerican history). Not much more to say that I can think of. Feel free to message or ask me about anything.

Anyway, this is the part where I tag people. I won’t be able to tag 9, but I’ll tag a few. Don’t feel obliged to do it or anything. @diavolo-senpai (my first follower) @badlydrawnjojo2star (my favourite art blog, all of your art is super awesome and it really shows that you both love and understand best JoJo) @lupus-lunarem (my biggest fan, thanks for all the support!) @dayferismad @machacapigeon @shitty-yama (other rad people who I appreciate). Oh, and if you want a... cleaner version of this template, you should probably get it from @shsl-gangster . Thanks again for the tag!

[the-desolated-quill]

Worst Behavior - The Defenders blog

(SPOILER WARNING: The following is an in-depth critical analysis. If you haven’t seen this episode yet, you may want to before reading this review)

Sigh.

Things didn’t start well when we were treated to a 10 minute introduction featuring the resurrection of Elektra, who is quite possibly the character I hate the most out of all these Netflix shows (Yes. Even more than Iron Fist, believe it or not). We see her do some fighting and eating and some more fighting and looking around a large empty room and even more fighting and checking out the Hand’s kitchen utensil collection before even more fighting, only this time in the dark, and finally being presented with some red rags as her reward for just how special and awesome and plot device-y she is.

If I sound like I’m not taking this seriously, it’s because I’m not. We’re back to the same problem that Daredevil Season 2 had. It’s hard to tell how scared or intimidated we should be by a threat if the threat is so ill-defined. That’s why the Hand have never worked as villains. Their plots are borderline incomprehensible, motivations are all over the shop and vital information needed to fully understand the characters are seriously lacking. Alexandra tells us that she wants to stop death, no doubt motivated by her cancer. But... can’t the Hand do that already? Remember Harold Meachum from Iron Fist? And how is Elektra supposed to help her achieve her goal? Because I’m not sure if I’ve asked this question before, but... oh wait. I have. Well fuck it. I’ll ask it again:

WHAT THE FUCK IS BLACK SKY?!?!?!

They could easily have answered this question in the 10 minute intro instead of this pointless montage of bullshit. It’s hard to be in awe over just how special Elektra is when you haven’t actually told us why she’s so special. The best I can cobble together is that the Black Sky is just a very good fighter. Except Daredevil’s a really good fighter. What is it that makes Elektra more powerful? She doesn’t even use chi like Iron Fist (not that Iron Fist ever uses his chi either because of bad writing, but that’s beside the point). How does being a good fighter help you to stop death? And why do you need the Black Sky to stop death, WHEN YOU CAN ALREADY BLOODY DO IT?!

Oh and Stick is back too. Quite possibly my second most hated character in all these Netflix shows (Yes. Even more than Iron Fist, believe it or not. Still, never mind Danny. Third place isn’t bad I suppose). Turns out he’s working for K’un L’un and is looking for Danny. You know, for an isolationist community, they sure do interact with outsiders a lot, don’t they?

At the end of the day, I just don’t care about boring old K’un L’un and their idiotic war with the Hand. It’s like the TV series Lost. Spend too long holding back key information and dicking around with the audience, and eventually the audience will stop giving shit and move on to something. That’s where I’m at now. I just want the Hand to fuck off and make way for the real villains. Like Kingpin, or Mojo Jojo from The Powerpuff Girls.

There is some good news though. We finally get some crossovers at last!

The bad news is it’s not done very well.

Actually that’s a bit too harsh. It’s done half well. Let me explain.

Worst Behavior decides to pair the Defenders up in twos before combining as a foursome at the end, and I think this episode perfectly demonstrates both the right way and the wrong way to do a crossover.

The first pair are Daredevil and Jessica Jones. This is the right way to do a crossover.

Matt manages to get Jessica off the hook, but is curious about Jessica because of her powers and her experience with Kilgrave. While Jessica continues her investigation, Matt starts tailing her. But of course Jessica, being a clever cookie, realises she’s being followed and gives Matt the slip, which leads to Jessica tailing Matt. Then Matt realises she’s given him the slip and is now tailing him and tries to give her the slip, which leads to him tailing her, tailing him, tailing her (if you see what I mean. I hope you’re keeping up with all of this. There’ll be a test later). This leads to Jessica discovering Matt’s abilities and sparking her own curiosity before they finally confront each other outside the building where Alexandra and the Hand are.

The reason this works is because it’s on the move. It’s dynamic and intriguing. At no point does their narrative ever get bogged down in exposition. Matt and Jessica’s relationship is based on a series of questions. What are you doing? How can you do that? What’s going on here? They try to find the answers to their questions without alerting the other, and as they observe each other, they start to become begrudgingly impressed with each other and we see the tentative foundations of a potential partnership begin to emerge.

Then there’s the second pair. Luke Cage and Iron Fist. This is the wrong way to do a crossover.

Luke tells Claire about what happened and she introduces him to Danny. Then instead of the four of them going off to investigate the Hand or do something productive, Claire and Colleen tell Luke and Danny to sit down and talk about their differences as though they’re two fucking five year olds on the naughty step. While this does lead to an admittedly brilliant exchange where Luke schools Danny on white privilege, it’s ultimately ruined by the context the exchange is in. I’m glad Luke takes Danny down a peg or two, but can we possibly do it without bringing the plot to a screeching halt? This show is already moving at a snail’s pace as it is. (on a side note, the lack of self awareness Danny has is extraordinary. It never occurs to him that being a white billionaire that treats a group comprised of mostly ethnic minorities as one soulless evil might rub a working class black man like Luke the wrong way. It never occurs to him that maybe wasting time dealing with the underlings of an organisation isn’t going to make a blind bit of difference unless you deal with the leader first. And it doesn’t occur to him that maybe he should be doing something to help people and that maybe there’s more to being a warrior than just living out a petty revenge fantasy. But then again this is Danny Rand we’re talking about here. He’s never been the sharpest knife in the drawer. He’s probably still surprised to wake up in the morning and discover he’s got a pair of feet).

The reason why this doesn’t work is because it’s static. The entire story is pushed to the side in order to revel in the novelty of two superheroes being on screen together, before bogging us down with exposition that’s solely for the benefit of the characters rather than the audience. For instance, do we really need to go through the origin stuff again? All the bullshit about chi and the dragon and everything? We know! We all bloody know! And it wasn’t that interesting the first time around! And then, just to waste even more of our time, Luke starts doubting the credibility of what Danny is saying. For fuck’s sake, how many times are we going to have to do this?! Aliens attacked New York! The Norse Gods of mythology exist! You’re fucking bulletproof! But chi energy? Nah! Danny is just being silly!

Still, at least Luke has something to do at last. His role in the group seems to be the emotional anchor. The guy who cares about the average joe in the street that will be affected in the crossfire. Sure, I’ll take that. Mike Colter does empathy exceptionally well. The scene where Luke comforts the grieving mother was particularly moving I thought.

Then at the end the Defenders finally team up in a pretty impressive fight in a hallway (it only took us nearly half the season, but we got there in the end). While Worst Behavior did ultimately leave a sour taste in my mouth, at least there’s a chance things might actually get good now. On the side of the heroes anyway. I’m afraid the Hand are a lost cause at this point.

[thebachelordiaries]

The Cutest 3-Way Ever: The Bachelorette Ep. 2 Recap

Episode one of The Bachelorette is like the first day of class where you go over the syllabus and briefly discuss what you will learn the rest of the semester.

Episode two is when we finally get down to business. We’re learning new things, doing homework and studying for tests. 

Ladies and gentlemen, the ball is officially rolling.

Truthfully, all I want to do is talk about Peter and Copper, but I am going to force myself to go in chronological order. We had two group dates sandwiched between a 1-on-1, and even my dad had a lot to say about tonight’s episode. 

He was live-texting me his thoughts.

(I probably should have responded so he would have continued to text me and I’d have more content. Oh well. Next time.)

Now, more importantly, let’s discuss what I have to say regarding this episode, which I absolutely loved.

Husband Material Date

The first group date of the season was essentially a competition to see which man feels the most like “husband material.” Rachel is looking for 1,000 thread-count husband material sheets, but her group of guys looks more like sheets found at The Dollar Tree or Walmart.

To conquer this difficult task, Rachel enlisted the help of celebrity power couple Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis to moderate the competition. 

Ashton was wearing a “husband material” shirt and now I need one for my future husband.

What do Ashton Kutcher and Peter have in common? They both modeled for Abercrombie & Fitch and they’re both husband material. More on that (and pictures!!!) below.

Mila is a Bachelor superfan who once pointed out to us all that Ashton looks like Jared Haibon from Kaitlyn’s season of the Bachelorette. 

Ashton said he doesn’t think Rachel’s husband is in this group, and I think I agree with him. Nonetheless, the show must go on.

To prove who is husband material, the men had to change a diaper, find a ring in a dish-ridden sink, vacuum, unclog a drain and lord knows what else while carrying a baby. Thankfully, the babies weren’t real or else we’d have multiple homicides on our hands.

“I’ve never held a baby before,” said Dean, who is someone looking to become Rachel’s future husband.

Ironically, the person who won this challenge is the opposite of husband material. Whaboom! guy literally spiked the baby to the ground after he won. He also accidentally drowned the baby during the competition. But hey, it wasn’t the “father material” obstacle course, so I digress.

Rachel is just so excited to get a hug from Whaboom!

Whaboom! then asks Ashton to do a Whaboom! and he swiftly declined.

The cocktail portion of the date was a real let down for Rachel; None of the guys were really bringing the romance. 

Whaboom! guy kissed Rachel and I haven’t cringed so hard since JoJo kissed Evan Bass, the erectile dysfunction guy.

Ticklemonster, who is actually a pediatrician and kind of growing on me, showed Rachel that you should minimize wiping a baby when changing its diaper. (personally, I find him Michael Cera-cute/awkward and also adorably funny)

Jack Stone was leaning towards Rachel so creepily while talking to her. I felt like she was trapped.

Blake just complained about Whaboom! the entire time and honestly I could care less. When is Blake leaving my screen? I don’t find him attractive at all.

Meanwhile, Fred is still stuck in the campzone.

The only person who Rachel felt any connection with was Dean, who was giggling like a little girl the entire time. Rachel told him that she liked his “going black and never going back” joke and that she actually wanted to use the joke first. Dean, thank your lucky stars you’re good looking because Rachel just saved your image.

Kenny also got a good edit here. Cute, romantic music was playing as soon as he started gushing about his 10-year-old daughter. I really appreciate how Kenny is hilarious and tough yet still sensitive. 

Rachel gave Dean the group date rose. Afterwards, he mans up, puts his big girl pants on, walks Rachel out the door and lays a big fat kiss on her. And it was no slobberfest kiss like the one with Bryan, so I approved.

A Doggy Day With A Smitten Kitten

Rachel’s date with Peter was perfect from start to finish.

She first informed him that a third wheel would be accompanying them on their date. Rachel says it would be her friend who was in an accident. She said she hasn’t seen him in a really long time. 

Enter: the cutest third wheel with three legs you ever did see: Copper.

Rachel revealed that Copper broke his foot jumping off something. He is really handling this injury in stride.

The three best friends anybody could have then boarded a private plane to Palm Springs where they attended Bark Fest: a place where dogs and humans can party as equals.

A few reasons why I loved this date:

You could tell Copper liked Peter, which is SO important. Dogs are the best judges of character.

Rachel and Peter discussed if they would be willing to move across the country for a relationship. They both said yes. 

Their conversation was so natural (it always is with Rachel though)

Peter picked up Copper and started dancing with him, which was cute as hell.

The dinner portion of 1-on-1 dates are typically known for getting deep, so I was exited to see what Peter has going for him besides a model face, salt-and-pepper hair and perfectly gapped teeth.

Rachel always gets the question, “You’re so great. Why are you still single?” which is annoying and also slightly offensive.

Either way, Rachel wanted to know how some girl (re: me) hasn’t scooped Peter up to keep him hostage in an abandoned basement. In response to her question, Peter admits to being heartbroken and dealing with a lot of issues from it. He says he sought relationship counseling after being in his last two relationships to figure himself out.

Rachel, who probably wanted to end the show right then and there, admitted that she also started seeing a therapist after her longterm relationship ended and it was one of the best decisions she ever made. 

Can you imagine that Peter is an actual living, breathing person? He’s an attractive male who openly admits to needing help to sort out his emotions. Mind blown.

If this doesn’t make these two the most adorable couple ever, hold onto your knickers: there’s more. Peter and Rachel had the most endearing conversation to ever happen on this show...They discussed their gapped teeth. Rachel said her decision to keep the gap was a personal choice because her dentist said it added “character” and Peter said the gap is a family trait he assumed he was stuck with for life. And now, suddenly, I want gapped teeth. 

Rachel basically threw the rose at Peter and they kissed and then kissed in front of romantic fireworks some more.

I’m pretty that everyone was Team Rachel and Peter Forever after this date. Everyone else is fake news.

Love & Basketball...And Some Other Shit

We’ve gone two whole Bachelorette seasons without a basketball group date, so I think we were overdue. 

And what kind of competition would it be without a special guest? Kareem Abdul Jabbar may have received the best introduction in Bachelor Nation history from Rachel. She was adorably screaming his name and jumping up and down. I loved it.

The boys split up into two teams to compete in a game of basketball [for Rachel’s heart, duh].

Even though his team lost, DeMario was really balling out. He blocked shots, he intercepted passes, he even dunked (at one point on Rachel, smh.) Little did he know, however, that he was shooting from Curry range the entire time.

The thing about shooting from Curry range is you’re going to miss because you’re not Steph Curry. Just like how DeMario wasn’t going to get away with having a “girlfriend” before he went on this show.

Some girl named Lexie showed up to the basketball game to tell Rachel that she has been dating DeMario for the past seven months. She said he stopped talking to her right before he went on the show. Some people are calling Lexie DeMario’s girlfriend, but they were probably just “talking.” Either way, Rachel didn’t approve.

“We’ve had sexual intercourse before” -from DeMario’s mouth to my blog post.

DeMario’s reaction to seeing Lexie was by far one of the greatest responses in Bachelor History. First, his face showed total recognition, then he quickly changed his approach and asked Rachel, “who is this?”

In the end, Rachel was pissed that DeMario wasn’t taking this process seriously. Lawyer Rachel doesn’t play. She promptly told him to “get the fuck out.” 

I know DeMario likes attention, but this is definitely a Charlie Sheen-type of attention, not his preferred Justin and Britney wearing matching denim outfits at the VMAs-type of attention. That’s karma for ya!

So then the cocktail hour portion of the date happened and nothing really memorable occurred. Josiah got the rose. I am still in firm belief he doesn’t have a strong connection with Rachel. Not buyin’ it.

Rose Ceremony

We never learn, do we? Every season, we go in with an open mind and an open heart. And every season, ABC take advantage of us by never completing the rose ceremony before the episode is over.

Notably, Bryan kissed Rachel again (less aggressively this time) and gave her a chiropractor adjustment, and hopefully a happy ending.

DeMario also crashed the rose ceremony to “apologize” to Rachel, but we won’t see what happens until the next episode.

Until next time, xoxo, The Bachelor Diaries.

Bonus Material

Country Boy Lee is apparently a huge racist and Chris Harrison said the show had no idea about his extremely offensive tweets before casting him. Read a full article on this issue here.

“I like boys who model for Abercrombie and Fitch”

Peter and Ashton were once Abercrombie model babes while...

Eric greeted you at the door.

“I’ll take Peter if I had one wish.”