#interested in June like that but it turns out I wasn't that crazy after all.

[ember-not-amber]

I recently started watching The Handmaid's Tale on Hulu (the last episode I watched was S2 ep 7) and I'm curious what the general consensus is on Luke & June vs Nick & June bc I really like Nick for June and Luke doesn't seem terrible at all. Still, that one flashback scene where he reassures June that they should stay together even though they started their relationship while he was still married to another woman, "she doesn’t matter because we’re going to get married. I’m going to make you happy." gave me the ick.

Like, you married Annie, too and you still cheated on her so how is that at all reassuring? I'm still waiting for a flashback that shows what Annie and Luke's relationship was like bc I have absolutely no clue why he cheated on her. I can understand why June technically cheated on Luke with Nick which was bc she was trapped in a terrible system where she was abused and felt unloved and unwanted and she was separated from her loved ones and she just wanted to feel something. So far I haven't seen any dialogue from Luke saying anything about what his marriage with Annie was like but if I had to guess, based on the episode where Annie stalked June and accused her of "stealing her husband" as if he's not also a human being capable of making his own choices, maybe they had differing views/ideas on what they wanted out of marriage, or he fell out of love with her, or he cheated just to cheat like a lot of douchebag guys do.

And yes, I am aware that June is also in the wrong for knowingly going after a married man, she isn't innocent in this either. She did seem to consider ending the relationship after Annie confronted her (which, why did it take his ex confronting you for you to consider not getting with a married man? Did Moira not give you any criticism for it? She seems like the type who would bc real friends tell you when you did sth wrong and they hold you accountable but judging by how they act around each other Moira seems very supportive of their relationship) whereas Luke didn't seem to think there was anything wrong with staying with the woman he started a relationship with while he was still taken at any point in time but that means nothing since she did end up staying with him despite that.

Sorry for how long this is, I originally meant for this to be shorter lol I'll put a Keep Reading tab in case ppl just want the tl;dr at the top. So, with all this considered I'm wondering if everyone else that enjoys this show wants June to end up with Nick or stay with Luke and which one is supported by the majority of people?

[doctorstrangereview]

0090: Marvel Premiere #4

Cover Date: September 1972 On-Sale Date: June 27, 1972

Doc continues to explore the mysteries brought to his attention last issue. It wasn't exactly anything voluntary as the impetus to do so is standing right in his living room. Barry (Windsor-) Smith continues art chores for one more issue. Archie Goodwin fills in as writer for this issue. Doc will get a semi-steady writer for the next few issues. The splash page credits include "Featuring concepts created by: Robert E. Howard." The central story is adapted (stolen) from The Shadow of Innsmouth and H. P. Lovecraft gets no credit or acknowledgement. The "protagonist" Ethan Stoddard is an obvious pastiche of the unnamed narrator. Even the blurb next to the title from the fictional Thanatosian Tomes sounds suspiciously like "In his house at R'lyeh, dead Cthulhu waits dreaming" from The Call of Cthulhu. There are more similarities along the way. Let's see what Archie and Barry have in store for us.

Doc has just entered this Sanctum Sanctorum fresh from his fight with Nightmare in the dream dimension and getting slammed by an 18-wheeler in this dimension. He's about to find out who cast the ominous shadow in the window from the final panel of last issue. He knows it's not Wong, because he passed Wong's room and evidently Wong snores.

Doc, being the polite host when he's not gruff and rude, refers to it as "the sounds of his slumber." Doc pulls back the curtain ready to cast a violent spell but only sees mild mannered Ethan Stoddard. Doc still hasn't cast any meaningful protection spells around his H.Q or even remembered to lock the door. Security, Doc! Security!

Ethan introduces himself and apologies for barging in and taking the liberty of building a fire. Never was someone so polite in their imposing themselves on someone else! Ethan tells Doc that he desperately needs his help. "Hang on minute, Ethan. I gotta take care of something else first." Doc rings a gong to (wake up and) summon Wong.

Wong enters stage left and apologizes for falling asleep before Doc got back. As he puts it: "I did not intend to retire before your return, but such exhaustion overtook me--" Doc slips back into his old ways and gets all cranky with Wong. "Get me balms and bandages! Now!" says Doc. Wong scutters off and Doc realizes that he probably shouldn't have said that in that way. He goes after Wong and for the first time Doc apologizes for being a jerk! Wong, being the self sacrificing dude he is, tells Doc it's not necessary.

Fortunately Wong won't be this big a pushover forever, but it'll take quite a while before we get there. Doc returns to the study and tells Ethan that along with things to plug up his wounds, Wong is gonna serve tea. Perhaps if Doc hadn't flown out of the E/R so fast his wounds would be in better shape and Wong wouldn't need to play nursemaid in addition to his other duties.

Ethan begins his story and Doc is all shell-like ears. Ethan and his fiancée, Beth (we meet her later,) are from a little town called Starkesboro (Innsmouth) and they both went to college together and came to the big city for graduate work. Beth was working on a thesis about the occult which is how they both found out about Doc. Beth returned to Starkesboro and started researching something called The Thanatosian Tomes. Beth put some of the crazy stuff she was researching in letters to Ethan and then stopped writing back completely and returning Ethan's missives unopened.

While Ethan tells his tale, Doc frets about the things happening. Him being really, really grumpy. Wong suddenly falling asleep. Ethan turning up out of the blue. Are these all a series of coincidences or is something going on.

Doc's like "that sounds interesting, but I gotta make sure you're not BSing me. I'm gonna probe you with my All-Purpose Amulet and then non-consensually remove your memory that I did it." Ethan appears to be telling the truth as we only see Ethan saying farewell to Beth as she departs on a bus. Then he wakes up to Wong getting Doc ready for a trip.

"You seemed tired after I did all that probing of your... mind, yeah, that's it, mind. So we let you doze off. Now lets head to that hometown that you really don't like." As they leave, Wong frets in a similar way that Doc did as Ethan narrated his tale. Doc and Ethan hop on a bus. How mundane an activity for the arguably second most powerful magic user on the planet. Ethan is amazed that Doc is doing all this for a stranger, including, presumably paying for the bus tickets. Doc replies with the platitudes that no one in danger is a stranger. Also, this may be bigger than the two of you, so there's that.

The bus stops for lunch and Doc marvels at the pleasures of consuming phallic shaped food.

Doc and Ethan arrive at Starkesboro amid appropriately freak weather. At the same time, Wong summons The Ancient One and asks him to go on a midnight rendezvous with Doc as he rudely refused to answer the phone earlier. (This happened off camera.) "Sure thing," replies The Ancient One and hangs up.

Back in Starkesboro, Doc comments how strange it is for church bells to be ringing at 11:00 PM. "Yeah, things are really effed up here, Doc," replies Ethan as they check into the crumbling old town's crappy only hotel. I'm guessing Doc is paying for this as well. Doc rings room service for tea and the man who checked them in brings it. "Is the rest of your staff attending the weird church service?" Doc asks. "This ain't no city hotel. I am the staff, you pretentious bozo!" the dude replies.

With that over and done with, Doc prepares for is assignation with his old buddy, The Ancient One. Trouble is, something's up and he has problems going ghost. With no mystic Viagra handy, he just has to struggle through and is finally able to rise to the occasion.

Doc and The Ancient One banter back and forth about books, cults and sleeping obscenities. The Ancient One departs saying he heads to his own battle as Doc faces whatever it is that's going on below in the town. What is Yao up to?

The next morning, Doc and Ethan are out and about in Starkesboro. Ethan is heading to the library when he asks a passerby if it's located where it used to be located. It turns out the passerby is an old buddy of Ethan's. But Lemuel looks a bit odd.

Lemuel looks like he's going through the same metamorphosis that the people of Innsmouth endured as they turned into deep ones. He's not at the point where he needs to breathe through gills yet so he can still service the plot. Ethan heads to library while Doc gives Ethan a knowing wink. "You and your lady friend should have some time to yourselves in the quiet back corner of the stacks. I'll check out the church for a few minutes."

Ethan has a run-in with the small town librarian who gives the typical "you don't belong here" speech. Ethan goes on in search of Beth while Doc enters the church. There's something up there because it's messing up Doc's disguise spell somethin' fierce!

That upside down cross makes the church a bit suspect. The altar with chains doesn't help any. Doc finds dried blood on the altar and realizes the lizard behind the cross means that the people here worship something called Sligguth. (I would say Dagon, but the next three issues have like three Dagons!) Behind the altar Doc finds a labyrinth of tunnels. Yeah, this church gets better by the second!

Camera two brings us back to Ethan and Beth. Beth gives the "go away outsider" comment. Ethan turns her around and: Oh, No! Beth has got that Starkesboro look!

Ethan runs out of the library and into the church to cry to Doc. He notices the upside down cross and lizard. Doc explains what it means.

Doc and Ethan are trapped in the church as the increasingly mutating townspeople gather outside. They are calling "Come out, Ethan!" This is not just a call for Ethan to leave the church or admit that secretly he likes Lemuel more than Beth. They are calling forth Ethan's Starkesboro look. They are successful and Ethan attacks Doc. The ungrateful sod!. Ethan explains that Doc's powers are being drained. Ethan and the townsfolk continue to put pressure on Doc to exhaust his power.

Doc flies around the church using his cloak but eventually he's too weak to even control that. The townsfolk break into the church. Ethan and Beth are all lovey-dovey again in their reptilian splendor. Acting in concert the townsfolk knock Doc unconscious we leave with him chained to the altar awaiting the arrival of Sligguth.

This was a lot of fun to read. Archie did well with his Innsmouth rip-off. In Innsmouth, the narrator gets stuck in the town "accidently" while here Ethan is forced to go back. The narrator doesn't have a sorcerer buddy or a fiancée to knock scaly boots with so Ethan seems to have things a bit better. Archie incorporated a nice bit of plot planning to draw Doc into this. It feels separate from the previous story, but we'll eventually see that the previous issue was a prelude to future events. It's well paced and we can probably blame Doc getting railed by a semi and then having to fight his favorite dream demon nearly to death for some dumb decisions on Doc's part. Barry continues to depict The Ancient One with a distinct lack of most clothing. Is he slowly attempting a naturist way of life or is it summer in Tibet with broken air conditioning? Part of me is sorry that this was Archie's only Doc story. The arc might have been more cohesive if he wrote a few more installments.

[bloodmaarked]

dracula // bram stoker

first published: 1897 read: 17 june 2024 - 04 july 2024 pages: 656 format: e-book (+audiobook)

genres: fiction; horror; fantasy (paranormal, vampires); gothic favourite character(s): lucy and quincey least favourite character(s): van helsing

rating: 🌕🌕🌕🌗🌑 thoughts: dracula got onto my radar somewhere somehow fairly recently and given it's one of the classics with probably the greatest cultural impact i thought i'd give it a read. i'm not that interested in horror or vampire lore but even given that, i was impressed with the many genuine moments of thrill and terror. it's clearly a classic for a reason and has stood up remarkably in that sense for over a century.

the first part which followed jonathan harker exclusively was so good at building the atmosphere and setting up dracula as a character. jonathan meets and lives in close quarters with the vampire himself and it's just a brilliant few chapters where tensions are increasingly high, the mood is eerie and nerves are set on edge. i think ultimately this was my favourite part of the book, although the parts that focused closely on lucy, dr seward and van helsing were a very close second. bram stoker was incredibly good at building tension.

the book as a whole was not consistently as brilliant, and that's what's led to my 3.5* rating. dracula suffers from what i imagine many books of this era do (i know the sherlock holmes series certainly does at times), which is that they do a whole lot of yapping about nothing of interest. i know this book could've been cut right down if they edited out all of van helsing's blah blah blah, and all the "poor, poor, dear mina"'s. the worst of it happens after the focus moves away from lucy, and it got difficult to remain engaged with the story (the thought of DNFing crossed my mind briefly). i happened to find the free audiobook of this on spotify (the inaudio edition narrated by randal schaffer), and i started using it to read along whilst crocheting. in my next sitting when i tried to read again during another dragging section of the book, i honestly couldn't really get through it without the help of the audio, even though i wasn't even a massive fan of the narration! the blabbing just continued on too long, and i was hovering at 4* still until it was getting towards the end of the book and i was still sitting bored through pages of nothingness.

there were a lot of interesting themes, such as religion, gender roles, etc. that would've made an interesting discussion in school or at a book club. the little research that i was prompted to do was also really cool, for example finding out that dracula was probably closely based on vlad the impaler (who looked crazy btw).

i'm glad i read it. would i recommend it? yes, but be aware of the type of book you're going into, and remember that this was written back when authors wrote for people who had longer attention spans and who didn't have any other entertainment to turn to like the next episode of love island!

[garfield-mug]

Adventures with Jake and June: Alpaca Edition

A/N: my second entry for Liz's (@sailor-aviator) Christmas Challenge. Another headcanon for you guys. It's kinda gross, but this is what it's like to work with alpacas! fun fact: during our alpaca lab i was the only student to make it out of the barn without being spit on.

i do use the word prompt, i promise.

And yes, alpaca (and llama) "spit" isn't just saliva. it's stomach contents. :) and it has a very... interesting smell.

Pairing: Jake Seresin x June Jackson (vet tech OC)

Word: Reindeer

Warnings: alpacas? animal handling? stomach contents/vomit

jake really didn't know what he was expecting when june offered to take him to a friend's alpaca farm. some cute photo ops, fluffy animals, maybe helping with some farm chores, sure. jake wasn't unfamiliar with farm chores, but they weren't his favorite thing to do. nevertheless, he'd offer to help out, even if no one asked.

june had promised it wouldn't be anything too crazy. she was meeting up with her friend and one of the doctors she knew to help get the animals in order for the new year. that mainly consisted of vaccines and hoof trimming.

the group was efficient, jake had observed. each would alternate between catching up an alpaca and doing the procedures. it was jake's job to the walk the alpacas a few feet into a different section of the barn where they had access to the pasture.

things were going smoothly up until the last alpaca. named snickers, she was anything but sweet.

getting close enough to catch her up was only half the battle, a feat in and of itself. they managed through all her kicking, biting, and spitting, eventually getting a decent hold thanks to one of the barn walls. it took the three of them to hold her for her hoof trim, june at the front, her friend at the back, and doc working the trimmers. june was holding snickers's head to her chest, but that didn't stop the animal from trying to spit in june's face.

by the end of it, everyone was panting and huffing, including snickers. she was passed off to jake, whose job was almost done, before she whipped her head around, releasing the last of her stomach contents and saliva right into jake's face, effectively splattering across his nose, cheeks, and lips. he froze, trying to process what just happened.

everyone gasped, eyes wide. june immediately rushed to jake's side, wiping at his face with the sleeve of her coveralls. her friend and doc also whipped into action, doc leading snickers out of the barn and june's friend leading the both of them to the house where jake could wash his face.

"baby, i am so sorry," june pleads as jake is holding his face under the faucet, enjoying the stream of clean warm water. she's getting a towel ready for when he's done, folding and unfolding the fabric in her hands.

jake turns off the faucet, leaning over the sink for a moment, before silently asking for the towel. he brings the plush fabric to his face, drying his skin.

he looks to his girlfriend, coveralls tied around her waist, face fraught with worry and guilt.

"stop apologizing."

"jake—"

"junebug, it's okay. i'm okay."

"you're not mad at me?"

jake brings his hands to june's shoulders.

"baby, i grew up on a ranch. i know how animals can be, especially when we're doing things to them that they don't like."

"i know, it's just—"

"it's just nothing. don't fret about it, please."

june pulls jake in for a hug. he kisses the top of her head.

he smiles after a few beats.

"if anything, it'll make for a funny story this christmas."

"like that time i got my ass kicked by a reindeer?" june's voice is small, but jake can tell she's smiling.

he chuckles, "yeah, like that time you got your ass kicked by a reindeer."

jake gives june's ass a playful smack for good measure. she yelps in surprise, pulling her head away from his chest to look at him incredulously.

"you are absolutely awful, jake seresin."

"but you loooooove me." he bumps his nose with hers, thankful it doesn't smell like alpaca spit anymore.

"i do."

[adragonsoulants]

Forgot to share this crazy happenstance of events. So my family and I keep honey bee's, last year I developed an allergy to their stings but that's not important to this story.

Gonna put a break here but there's pics of bees swarming below the cut if you're interested!

So we have a little homemade green house out by our beehives and I was in there planting some gourd seeds that finally started to sprout ( 2/10 so far 😭) and while I was out there I was like "why do the bees sound like they've been getting louder?" Figured it was just me and didn't pay much mind.

Then I turn to leave the green house and see loads of flying around!! Startling! Caught them right as they were starting to swarm. I go in to talk with a family member about it but we've only had this happen once before and we didn't know till it was too late and haven't had a hive make it over the winter since. I decided to head back out and see what they're doing now a few mins later and sure enough! They were in fact swarming and had clustered on a nearby tree right in easy reach for us!

They were really weighing down those branches, I think one cluster fell off because of the weight haha.

Sadly in the rush of things I left my phone inside while changing so I wasn't able to get any more photos of the process but it's a pretty simple one.

I'll try to explain it!

So basically we go grab an empty hive and put it under the clusters and just shake them off into the box haha.

If we had a little thing to put the queen we would go looking for her first (though we've never been good at that) so that we can be sure she got in. It kinda looks like those plastic hair clips with the claws, but like to hold a bee haha.

We know the queen is in the hive once other worker bees literally start marching into the box, highly recommend looking up a video of it, it's wild they just form a line walking right in. Other bees will stick their butts in the air and use their wings to fan out pheromones for other bees to find the nest.

After we get most the bees in we close up the top, we did put in some frames with some honey on them to give them a little boost and entice them to stay ;)

During the whole process the bees are surprisingly chill! Swarming bees (assuming they aren't of the killer bee variety) are! They have no brood or honey to protect at this point and are really exposed.

We had gone and checked our other hives as well as the one this came from to see if any others were about to swarm and they are all remarkably chill as well, we suspect whatever pheromones the swarming hive gave off was also affecting the other hives.

Oh and to add the hive that had swarmed had already FILLED with honey?! ITS NOT EVEN JUNE!! We gave them an extra honey medium and even took two frames out of their brood deeps that were just honey and scored them to uncap them so that the honey would be recollected by all the hives. And we replaced them with empty frames for them to hopefully put brood on this time.

Also the photo above, they aren't trying to establish a home there. They're collecting there to wait for scouts to come back and tell them about potential new locations for their home. Figured I should add that.

Also when a hive swarms they more like splitting into 2 hives. The one that leaves has the current queen that they've been training and getting ready for this. And the old hive is in the process of making a new queen with premade queen cells and they feed the larva a very rich honey, often called Royal Jelly, to turn what would just be a worker into a queen.

These little bugs really plan this shit out.

So anyways that evening we went to check on them and make sure they were still in the box and sure enough they're still hanging around!

You might also notice that doesn't look like a typical wooden hive box. It's made of styrofoam so it's lighter than the traditional wooden nest while also being like 10x more insulating.

It gets pretty cold in the winter here with a lot of temperature fluctuations, lot of melt and freeze, and some strong northern winds so it helps them out in the winter.

Thanks for reading this word dump!

[bringmoresorrows]

Life Update

It's been a long time since I posted a life update. Lots of new things has happened in my life especially since i haven't updated in a year. Last year, I got myself into a situationship with this guy I became really close to really quickly and broke up with my ex of 4 years. We were dating from 2018-2022. Wow. A lot of things happened between my ex and I thankfully nothing traumatizing between us but we were falling out of love a year before the break up. As it got closer and closer to the end, I felt nothing to my ex. I was sick of how my ex constantly made me feel guilty for being myself. Plus my ex was transphobic and homophobic. Theres reasons for it as she came out as trans after we broke up. She never wanted to go out on dates with me, we stayed in the house and she didn't want to get to know my friend until like the week before we broke up. We had an apartment for a week and a half last April because the landlord said it was okay that we had the ferret then last minute they pulled back saying "nah get rid of the ferret" so we left. But it took a lot of me arguing with her for her to stand up to the landlord as my name wasn't on the lease, her name was. After that, anything i felt towards her was gone. I moved in with my parents in July and that was when my situationship with my friend started.

My heart was broken around September/October and I quickly moved onto someone new. But in between, I had no place to live aside form my parents couch and all my stuff was in storage. I even lost my ferret. My ex kept her. I got promoted to manager at my workplace and got a 2% pay increase which landed me at $20/hr where I was working 34-36 hrs a week and towards the holiday season after working 40-42 hrs a week. So I was bringing home a lot of money and had zero bills. I started building up my savings and come October, I moved in with two of my friends.

October was an interesting month last year, we had no furniture and we couldn't afford anything as we just dumped our savings into this place. It's a three bedroom apartment with 1.5 bathrooms. We have an in house washer and dryer and a dishwasher. It was awesome! We have so much space. The friend group kept making plans at my place and a few things led to another and that situationship friend and I broke things off. Mid october, I started talking to this guy over instagram. And we started hitting it off a lot. Turns out, my guy roommate and him are *best friends* so for our halloween party, he came on over! He lives a few boroughs away so its a 3 hour travel to his place and a 3 hour travel to mine. So 6 hrs total. So he came over the 30th and left November 1st. I got so drunk on the 31st and stuff happened between us before we were dating which is kinda another first for me as we just met in person for the first time. But the first time I did stuff with someone I wasn't dating was the situationship.

Come november, we start dating. Our relationship has been a bit rocky as we jumped into a new relationship and I was very much still hurt over the situationship and didn't want to admit it til a few months back. Plus living on my own has only amped up my mental health issues. I started my ed habits back up hard and lost 20 lbs in 2 months. I gained half of that back but its been hard.

January comes around and my ex tells me she cant house our ferret anymore so I was given the ferret <3. Bless.

February comes and my ferret gets very sick, throwing up for three days straight so we take her to the emergency vet and it helped her out a bunch <3

March comes and my mental health takes a worse turn.

April I have zero memories, In may my birthday happens. It was awesome! The friend group and I plus my bf + my sister go mini golfing! June nothing isolated. July: my internet friend from norway comes to visit and wow did it hit the roof. One thing led to another and they guilt trip me hard and gaslight me into thinking *i'm the crazy one* and I wind up having a severe mental break down where I attempted suicide. I also left the friend group. A day later my boyfriend calls me and gives me an ultimatum and tells me really harsh things to me which led me to crying for days and crying through a whole work shift (8 hours)

August comes and my depression is so severe, I wind up reaching out to a therapist and my pcp to start medication. Ella, my ferret, also has some more health issues showing up. Her tail has been losing fur for some time and her ears are getting backed up with ear wax. She wound up getting diagnosed with Adrenal Gland Disease. ;-;.

September; this month; comes around and therapy has been working and so has the meds. My relationship with my partner is getting a lot better and Ella is doing good too. She got her implant for Adrenal Disease this month. I've just been really tired ngl. Like very tired. But my house is getting decorated for halloween and its great!

Things are going really well for me and the people I used to miss I dont miss anymore. They didn't want me in their life then so be it. That's their problems. There was someone I named dropped a long time ago but I dont miss you anymore. You left my life and made it clear you never gave a fuck about me and only yourself. Goodbye to you. And to the other friends that bridges were burned, fuck it. I let go of it. I need to focus on myself and grow.

Next year around this time I will be moving in with my boyfriend and away from this borough where everyone knows each other. It will be rough to be in a more city based area. Its still a bit suburban but its very much on top of each other. I'm excited for it. I'm excited for the future that I'm going to have. I'm excited for the future with out the things that are holding me back.

[apple-pecan]

Super Mario Bros. Wonder (2023)

MINOR SPOILERS

when this game first got revealed in june my response was honestly a bit mixed. it certainly looked nicer looking than the swathes of """"new"""" super mario bros games that 2D mario was solely relegated to after yoshi's island all the way back in 1995, but i personally always wanted to see a hand-drawn style for a 2D mario along the lines of wario land shake it, and this wasn't quite it. i was also convinced you couldn't really do anything new with 2D mario, at least modern nintendo. the devs of wonder apparently read my mind and made it their goal to prove me specifically wrong.

you probably don't need me to tell you this game blows the NSMB games out of the water, aesthetically. if those games were sonic 4, then this is sonic mania. characters actually have expressions and the animations are lively and well... animated. gone is the obnoxious BAH sample used every ten seconds in the soundtrack; the music is all pretty distinct from each other with not many tracks that repeat. there are now talking flowers with real voice acting for some reason. mario is an elephant. there are sentient pipes. it's got it all.

the big thing that sets the game apart are the wonder flowers; when you touch one, either out in the open or hidden during a stage, crazy shit happens. you can walk on the background. you can turn into a goomba and embark on a stealth mission to not get eaten by the other enemies in the stage. all the enemies will stop trying to kill you and break out into a musical number. it fucking rules. each stage has a different wonder flower effect and very few of them repeat: it's worth playing just to see what kind of crazy thing they'll subject you to next.

another cool thing are badges, which give you either new action abilities like being able to use a parachute for further jumps like in SNES aladdin, a higher, floatier jump, and the crouching high jump from SMB2, or passives like being able to start the course with a mushroom, or a radar that goes off when your close to a secret. you can swap out abilities when you die, so if one badge isn't cutting it for your current stage, you can try again with a new one before you respawn. the only thing that kinda sucks is that in multiplayer, everyone must share the one badge.

i guess my only other main complaint is that, despite the aforementioned musical numbers which are all awesome, the actual music in the game is not really as memorable as i hoped. this could change as i play the game more and do post-game objectives, but so far nothing wowed me like say, 3D world or odyssey. i guess the music isn't as bipolar as a certain other $60 2D platformer game that came out the same week, but sadly i wasn't that impressed. that said, and being as vague as possible, the final boss uses the music to the gameplay's advantage and was the highlight of the game by far.

in short, it's good to finally have an actually interesting 2D mario game again, after years of it playing second banana to the 3D games in terms of scope and personality. i dunno if it should join the ranks of SMB3, world, or yoshi's island just yet, but it was certainly a breath of fresh air after 17 years of BING BING BAH BAH WAHOO PIZZA GO THAAT'S A SO NICE OH GOD HELP THEY'RE INVADING MY BRAIN IT'S SO FUCKING RETRO GOD FUCK MAKE IT STOP HELP ME

5/5

NOTE: one of the badges let's you perform the wall jump from mega man x. yeah hello, based department?

[awakeshedreams]

sugar and spice ( 1 )

pairing : resident bad boy!jjk x model student!reader

setting : highschool!au x stepbrother!au

summary :

a messy highschool!au x stepbrother!au where model student reader who has quite a few dirty little secrets sees her world take an unexpected turn when her mother comes home one day with an engagement announcement, to the father of none other than the school's resident bad boy.... Jeon Jungkook.

genre : smut, for laughs, kinda pornish, slow burn with collosaly overwhelming sexual tension

rating: soft m ( for now ) due to adult content

warnings : unconventional relationship of sexual nature, tropes and clichès, teenagers partaking in porn-esque activities, made up things with made up people happening in a made up world, don't like don't read XD

wordcount : 2.3K

a/n : i've been fighting in a long standing war and I have lost. the man known as jeon jungkook had his foot on my neck for years and today, I have finally submitted to my fate and surrendered to his reign.

yes. after a hundred years, i'm writing again. specifically, writing for bts. particularly, writing for jungkook. its been a long time coming.

life just took over and I transitioned into an adult and kind of grew out of the state of mind I was in before. but. sigh. jeon jungkook has been tormenting me the whole time. it was only a matter of time before i relapsed honestly.

so here I am again. in mind, body and spirit, a different person from who I was before but still the same in the sense that with the way bts have my whole heart, jk will always be the demon in the corner of my room that I invite to bed for a cuddle even though it's (probably really) not good for me.

do not misconstrue. I love him more than I can say. but. sigh. he has me in a chokehold, loves. please try to understand where I'm coming from.

anyways, enough with this ranting. you all came here for the nitty gritty so let me not hold you hostage with my dilemma rambling any longer. here's to the first bts fic i've posted in literal years. introducing- sugar and spice.

1 2

Unless they told someone, no one would have been able to guess it.

At school they were complete strangers.

She was the nice head girl with a clean record, all smiles and straight A’s. He was the mysterious bad boy with a track record, all tatted up with bruised knuckles.

She wore plaid skirts with neat pleads in them and pastel sweaters with bows at the collar. He wore jeans with rips in them and leather jackets with studs.

They couldn't have been any more different.

As far as anyone was concerned, they existed on two extreme ends of a vast spectrum.

What they didn't know was that they shared a dirty little secret.

.

You were a girl with many dirty secrets.

For instance, you used to sell nudes online. It was a side hustle you did.

Not because you needed money.

Your mom was a renowned doctor so there was more than enough of that in your life.

Not because you needed validation from people online either.

Even without the constant compliments and the praises you knew you were visually blessed with a pretty face and a nice body too.

All things considered, you simply thought you had a nice pair of tits and you took pictures of them sometimes.

Posting the shots you snapped online came much later when you heard about this website where people were getting paid crazy money for posting racy things.

‘It’s just so degrading…’ It was one of your friends, June, who sneered, pretty nose scrunched up. She fixed her long ponytail and rolled her brown eyes while looking in the mirror at her locker. ‘Who would do such a thing, am I right?’

She said this, but June was the girl who has slept with more boys than she could count on her two hands. And those were the ones she told you about.

Like every other time, you said nothing. Even when it carried on to lunch with the rest.

‘Pretty desperate if you ask me.’ Mei the stellar track runner shrugged casually as she stretched her limbs like routine.

‘Where are their parents?’ Nina the library nerd shook her head in disapproval as she fixed her glasses so it sat right on the bridge of her nose.

‘Um… I don’t think it’s … appropriate… to talk about ….’ Kiko the one who always carried a cross and bible around mumbled into her sleeve.

All your friends spoke of it in derision and repulsion of course. This was a school for proper children so they were proper girls. At least they were supposed to be.

Regardless the conversation sparked a curiosity in you.

So you made an account and uploaded your first picture. Nothing bizarre. Just your tits in a pretty lace bra.

You made sure to keep your face out of the frame because that was the smart thing to do and you were nothing if not the smartest student in school.

In all honesty, you weren’t expecting anything out of it. In fact, in between work with student council and tutoring your juniors with finals right around the corner, you even forgot about it for an entire month.

It was by a complete whim that you decided to open the app while you’d been unwinding at your desk following a tedious day at school.

To say you were amused by the response you found waiting for you would have be a grave understatement.

You were staring at the four figure digit that now sat in your bank account.

Reading through the comment section was even more interesting.

There were all sorts of people there who had all sorts of things to say. Ranging from honestly sweet to downright dirty.

You had never been brought to tears laughing in her life before until then.

It was just so funny to see people misbehave and lose their minds over a pair of tits.

From then on it just sort of became a thing.

.

But that wasn't the worse of your secrets.

You were making a name for yourself on the crude web months later.

The next step was naturally to move from making taking pictures to making videos. Since you was already in too deep you didn’t see why not.

So you upgraded and opened another account. An amateur one where your touched yourself for an audience.

You were no prude.

You might have never been touched by a boy before but you had touched yourself plenty times. Stress and frustration came hand in hand with being head girl. Since you couldn’t quite vent it out at the annoying troublemakers at school, this was your second best option.

Third was watching porn, but that was mostly when you were extremely bored.

But that wasn’t where that little endeavor ended.

Later on it became a lot more risqué.

.

It all started when your mom hit you with a marriage announcement.

She met a guy on her business trip who she really liked and she was convinced he was the one.

Your mom had a tragic history of being a bad judge of character.

You’ve had this conversation at least five times since you became old enough to understand that boys and girls who were just friends didn’t kiss and sleep with each other.

Most times, it felt like she was doing it because she thought you needed a dad around.

You might have once, when you were younger and your mom was too busy with work to be there. But she worked from home these days and you were soo busy with school to worry about things like that.

This time it was like she was doing it for her. You were glad.

Your mom looked genuinely happy when she spoke about this guy.

Who were you to get in the way?

.

She spent almost the whole weekend in the kitchen. It was the longest you’ve seen her in there in your entire life.

She was excited for the dinner on Sunday.

Mr Jeon was the name of the chosen man.

He was coming over with his kid. A son, his only family. His wife passed away years ago.

You wore the dress your mom picked out for you, something cream in color and off the shoulders that brushed your knees. She looked pretty in her champagne dress. It was different from the office slacks and loose blouses you were used to seeing her in.

You stood by her at the door while the guests came through.

Lifting your head from a polite bow, you found herself staring straight into an achingly familiar pair of glinting dark eyes and went completely still.

‘Sweetie,' Your mother said sounding delighted, a soft hand on your stiff shoulder. 'This is Mr Jeon and his son Jungkook.’

Ah. Fuck.

‘Jeon dear, this is my daughter. Isn’t she lovely?’

.

Dinner was a mild affair, with small talk and the occasional clinking of cutlery on fine china.

From the outside looking in, you probably looked the picture perfect family already.

Only if no-one looked close enough.

Arms crossed, tongue in cheek. Your discomfort could be detected from miles away.

The two adults were oblivious.

The dark eyed boy with the slightest wave to his nape touching, brow grazing, ear covering onyx hair sat across you though; he took note of this with a passing glance and wordlessly returned to his food.

Jeon Jungkook had a countenance that betrayed his reputation.

Even though you’ve never talked, you knew plenty about him and you were sure he knew a lot about you too.

You went to the same school.

Dressed as he was in a crisp white dress shirt buttoned at the wrist and dark tailored pants with a fine belt on, it might have been hard to tell what kind of person he really was.

You lifted her gaze from your plate to look study him wordlessly, idly twisting the noodles with your fork.

People either called him the black sheep or the dark cloud but for you, Jeon Jungkook was the school’s resident lone wolf.

He smoked in the secluded areas on campus, sometimes playing his guitar. Beat up people who got on his nerves, sometimes using his guitar. Slept in class the rare times he was there, many times on his guitar.

Being his senior, you had never seen any of any of that for yourself. But you received plenty reports weekly to come to a sound conclusion.

There was no way people hated him enough to join hands in solidarity and make this all up.

It was quite the contrary actually. He had an alarming number of fans.

On the surface level you couldn’t see why. Most times you saw him, he looked bored out his mind and honestly, intimidating.

Maybe it was the tattoos. Or the ripped skinny jeans. Or the leather jackets with studs.

Maybe it was the domineering height and fit frame and structured face.

Maybe it was the intense dark eyes or the silky ruffled hair.

Even then, you failed to see the irresistible appeal in him. All those things that made him up only added to his unapproachable aura.

Bottom line was, he was bad news.

.

You didn’t want to be a spoil sport.

But how much of a thug your mom’s boyfriend’s son was shouldn’t be something that would make her like him less.

They were both their own people. Right ?

It was just that you just didn’t want her to be shocked and devastated if something happened later. When it happened.

Yet it seemed the serious conversation would have to wait.

After dinner your mom suggested you head to the living room to chat over wine and cheese.

You stayed back to do take out the dishes.

Earlier, your mom had stood to do it instead at first.

‘Don’t bother with that, dear.’ She reached for the plates in your hands. ‘Let me do it.’

‘It’s okay, mom.’ You smiled a little. ‘This is your night. I’ll meet you in the living room.’

'Sweetie...' Your mom looked close to tears. ‘But there’s so much of it…’

‘Jungkook,’ his father's voice had cut through the moment. He was a serious man in a crisp suit with a stoic countenance. His voice was just naturally authoritarian without him trying ‘Give her a hand.’

Jungkook stood, almost robotically.

‘It’s fine.’ You said. Politely. Nicely. Tightly. ‘I can handle this much.’

You left without another word.

That had been moments ago and now you were done with cleaning.

You stood at living room entrance for a while, taking in the scene.

The two adults were exchanging moon eyes and whispering in each other’s ears at the love seat.

Jungkook was sitting on a solo seat, but he was on his phone, completely unbothered by what was happening.

Your mom seemed to think it was the perfect time to pull out the photo album right then and there upon seeing you.

It was embarrassing but at least you knew you didn’t have to worry about the pictures spreading at school.

Jungkook was looking, picking up a picture occasionally to rove over, but he wasn’t the type to do that.

He also wasn’t the type to stare but you felt his glance shifting to you and lingering multiple times.

Once, you caught his eyes and he just stared at you across the coffee table wordlessly with a curious tilt to his head, idly flipping a picture of you dressed as a knight in glitter shining armor for Halloween at eight in his hands.

Honestly, it was starting to get annoying.

But you endured. For your mom’s sake.

.

Your alarm went off at exactly ten.

As subtly as you could, you excused yourself with an apology to the guests, saying you weren't really feeling well.

In hindsight you probably should have used a better excuse.

Your mom was notorious when it came to worrying, especially when it comes to your health.

Also, you probably should’ve locked the door before undressing just for good measure since people were over.

But in the moment, you were too busy setting your camera up where you were kneeling on the floor at the foot of the bed to be concerned about that.

That day you were testing out a new toy.

.

Distractedly, you took note of a couple of people asking you if that was your boyfriend’s shirt you had lifted over your tits.

You ignored them.

Couldn’t a girl own an oversized tee without getting any flack?

Trivial comments like that aside, a good majority of the audience are fawning over how wet you were and how perfect you bouncing tits look being played with.

Your head fell back and your eyes fluttered shut.

You were sitting there, knees raised to your chest and legs splayed, your gushing pussy in full display where the toy was stuffed deep into her tightness, vibrating pleasantly.

‘I’m close…’ you mumbled throatily, squeezing your tits and pinching your stiff nipples in between your moving fingers. You moved your hips move faster, feeling the toy buzz against fluttering walls. You took a hand off one of your tits to rub at your engorged clit. ‘Fuckfuckfuck…’

Deep in your high, you didn’t hear the door open and close with a foreboding click.

You only heard your name being called by a deep, smooth voice through the heady haze.

Instantly you stilled.

When you snapped your head to look over her shoulder Jungkook was there, hands in his pockets, leaning against your doorframe with his sleeves drawn up to his elbows, muscle roped, inked skin on full display.

When he tilted his head to the side a little, appraisively, you dared to say as a quaking chill ran down your spine and your entire body felt like it was about to burst into flames, a bit of his hair fell over his face.

His eyes were like two black in the dark as he took you in, dragging his gaze up and down your exposed body languidly.

In the back of your mind, you wished the ground would part and swallow you whole.

‘Your mom,' he starts, capturing your attention wholly, dark gaze finally flickering to your face, his voice suddenly lower, hoarser. ‘She sent me over to check on you.’

It took you a moment to realize where you were, who you were, who he was.

It was like a bucket of cold water had been dropped over your head.

Jeon Jungkook, the school's resident trouble maker, soon to be your step brother, just walked in on you fingering yourself in in front of a recording camera.

Well. Yeah.

You gulped.

You were royally fucked.

depending on the response I get I might ( most probably will ) delete this. not because I'm ashamed of my work. because I'm embarrassed of myself. I really swore to never write again and here I am. sigh. yes, I have seen my previous works and noticed just how terrible they were and this is a big reason why. so sorry for putting you through that. a million apologies.

also, that's right. I have adopted a new style which might not be to everyone's liking. another reason why.

anyways, if you liked this filth ( i know it seems mild but I can tell you it's very likely gonna get worse ) please idk uh... fuck this isn't ao3. hm.

like and drop by in the ask box if you liked it and want to see more. it makes me happy. its like serotonin fuel to me.

have a nice day. see you next time ( maybe ). stay fresh. yeah. 💜💜.

[atalho-s]

Light Up The Dark

Part 1 | June

pairing: bartender!tom x famous!reader

warnings: some smut +18 (in this particular chapter it’s nothing TOO explicit, but miniors be aware), swear words?, drinking, let me know if anything else!

words: 4.9 k

summary: y/n is a famous horror writer. Her books are on the lips of the people and her face is on all the magazine covers of promising young people.

She has just moved to Los Angeles, the city of celebrities and luxury, when she starts to get a writer's block as she starts writing her newest book. A way to distract herself and seek inspiration leads her to have her destiny mapped out with a simple waiter named Tom who has a delicious british accent.

What happens when her inspiration comes back only after she spends a night with him and she only manages to write after being in the company of that guy she just met? Maybe he'll become her newest addiction.

a/n: english it’s not my first language, so i’m sorry for any mistake! this is a series i started writing a while ago, i hope y’all enjoy :) the reader it’s from brazil here, but you can replace from any country you want lol And obv i’m not from LA and never been there, so if i say something out of reality it’s bc of that 😂

"June arrived at the restaurant, sat down near the bar and looked around vaguely. The strange people's faces made her think better and maybe drink a shot of tequila too.

She opened his folder with the horrifying photos of the mysterious case. She felt sick to her stomach.

People said that by then she should have been used to see this kind of thing, but that was repulsive.

She wish the nightmare she had the night before was a way to solve that puzzle, but believing in the afterlife now wouldn't help her... If...If..."

- Damn it... - Y/n slammed her fist on the table. - Writer's block sucks. - She said and took the last sip of her tea.

It s been a week since she couldn't write anything. She would write maybe two paragraphs, maybe even three if she got lucky, but she always ended up erasing it, because she always turned into something meaningless or too cliche.

Damn the time she had promised to deliver something to her editor by the end of the month. But she hadn't counted on the lack of ideas when she agreed to that.

She got up from her chair in frustration and crossed her arms, pacing, as if her creativity had gone out for a walk and she was waiting impatiently for it to come back.

Why had she agreed to write a new book in the first place? She didn't need money. Their previous four books were already making huge profits, and they were going to make a new television series based on one of them.

So why writing another one? Maybe because, she had been having too many nightmares lately. Many family and friends told her to see a psychologist, see if she didn't have some hidden trauma. But looking for a psychologist? Admitting your weaknesses and personal things to a stranger? Never. That would be horrifying.

Writing helped. Transferring his fears to pages was hers gift. When she wrote she didn't have nightmares, didn't see things, wasn't sad. It was like a drug, a calming medicine.

Maybe fame was also making her restless lately. She hated being the spotlight, being the magazine cover of promising young people. She hated to see her name highlighted. But she loved having readers, yes. She loved when someone felt good reading her books or in the good sense of the word: terrified by her stories.

At the height of her 25 years, he never thought her books would become famous at that point. She had always enjoyed writing since she was a child, but working with it was just an unattainable dream. Until, at age 19, she quit her hideous job as a hotel receptionist and decided to publish her first story.

Obviously there were many rejections, until a publisher agreed to publish their work. From then on, her books became more and more known. They called her the new horror genius, the mystery queen, and sometimes even "Stephen King's lost daughter."

She didn't think it was all that. But she accepted the descriptions gladly. No wonder her books didn't come out of the top spot on the best sellers.

Another thing that motivated her to continue with that story, was a phrase from her own idol mentioned, Stephen King: "good stories are those that stay in the head for a long time". And God only knew how that story had been with her for far too long. She always wanted to put it down on paper, so here she was trying to put into words what her head brought up as random thoughts.

But now she was having one of his first creative blocks. Obviously she had already had it with previous books, but nothing as frustrating as this one. She had been trying hard for days, which was exhausting.

She looked at the clock on the wall: 11pm. Who knows if she took another break before starting writing again? Maybe it would help to come up with more ideas.

She thought about watching a show or movie, but he wasn't in the mood. She looked at her long polka dot pajamas under her favorite warm robe and snorted. Go out? On a Thursday night? On a cold night? No way.

But what if it helped her have more writing material? Watching people on the street really helped. If June, the character in her book, was in a bar, maybe if she went to one too it would help to have something to build on.

Writers did it all the time. Describe places that already existed, situations similar to which they lived. So, it wouldn't be new. Maybe she'd even put the location in her tribute if helped she got out of her creative block.

She took a deep breath and went to take a shower. It was decided, she would go out. She put on her best jeans, a Ramones T-shirt with a leather jacket. It wasn't a fancy outfit, but she didn't intend to go somewhere fancy anyway. Her stylist would have been dying to see her now, but she didn't care one bit.

She went out pressing the bottom of the elevator. Y/n had lived on the top floor of a building for 2 months, right in downtown Los Angeles. Sometimes she didn't even know why she chose to live there, she hated the big city and what came with it: paparazzi, celebrities, crazy people who feel superior, wealth and luxury. She came from a humble family, so she always felt like an outsider.

Y/n arrived downstairs and left the condominium calling a taxi that was passing in the street just in time. She walked in and closed the door, crossing her arms, trying to ward off the cold.

- Good night miss, where are you going? - the driver asked looking at her in the rearview mirror.

- Good night... Actually I don't know, do you have any suggestions for a bar around here?- she asked looking out the window. She didn't even bother to look for suggestions for places nearby.

- Well, it depends on what you're looking for... Something luxurious or something fun? - He said and a smiled played on the corer of her mouth. Luxurious was the opposite of fun indeed.

- Something fun, of course.

- So, I suggest the new Seven Devils bar, it's less than 20 minutes from here... - he said.

- Interesting name... Could be. - She said shrugging.

- The name is kinda creepy, but the place is cozy and welcoming, I went once. - the driver said starting and entering the street that was practically empty for being a weekday.

- Cool... - Y/n said looking at the city lights through the window.

After nearly twenty minutes the taxi stopped in front of what appeared to be a small door with a security guard in front of it. The neon sign indicated the name of the place, it seemed a mysterious place for those who passed by without knowing it.

- Thanks. - Y/n said handing the driver the money.

- You're not the Y/n Y/l/n? I didn't want to say anything, but I'm a fan of you, I love your books, they help me pass the time while I wait for passengers. - the driver asked turning a little with one of the Y/n books in his hand. - Could you sign this for me?

- Sure! - Y/n spoke excitedly taking the book from his hand and leaving a message along with her signature. - Thanks for the tip of the place. Have a good night... - She said opening the door.

- No, thank you, have a good night miss. -he said and she smiled closing the door and the taxi left leaving her alone looking at the door in front of her.

She approached the security guard who wished her good night, giving her room to enter, after she showed her ID. Y/n entered a little afraid of what she would find. The door behind her closed and she looked around. It was really cozy as the taxi driver said, it had a part with several tables, which were a little empty and a bar with stools around. The place had a good atmosphere, one of those that people go there to meet and chat with friends, in the background there was a kind of pop song that she wasn't sure if she knew or not.

He slowly approached the bar and sat down on one of the stools. A woman with several tattoos appeared behind the counter and came to serve her.

- Good night! How can I serve you?- she asked with a smile.

- Good night... Hm... Maybe a martini? - Y/n said taking a look at the drinks on the shelf behind the attendant.

- Okay, I'll be back with your order, anything else?

- That's it for now, thanks. - She replied smiling and the attendant walked away.

Y/n kept looking around, watching people, maybe looking for some inspiration. Something that would turn the key in his mind. Many who were there were in groups of friends and were talking animatedly, laughing. Some young and some older, in suits and ties, perhaps coming out of work.

Until one guy in particular caught her attention. He wore the black uniform with the name of the place, with an apron tied around the waist of the same color, and was picking up some glasses from some empty tables. He had dark brown hair slicked back and eyes the same color, very expressive and large. A boy's face from the outside, but on the inside had a mysterious and confident air.

He balanced a tray full of things with an greatest skill in one hand and smiled at some people, he seemed charming because everytime he left a table he left people whispering and giggling embarrassed behind his back.

He walked over and entered the bar placing the tray behind the counter, came close to the other attendant who already had the Y/n martini ready and she could hear him talking, soon realizing he had a perfect accent.

- Sally, you can leave it to me, go take your break. Whose martini is it?- he asked taking a look around.

- Oh thank you, my feet are killing me. It's the girl over there. -she said indicating Y/n with her head and he looked at her, making Y/n realize that she was staring at him for too long, so she looked away embarrassed.

- Okay. - he said looking at where Y/n was sitting and stopped in front of her with the glass. - Good night miss, here is your order. - He spoke with a british accent. Only at that moment did Y/n realize that his accent was well loaded and God only knows how much she loved that accent.

- Oh yes, thank you very much. - She said raising her eyes to look at him and smiled then he blinked with one of his eyes and gave her one more look, before going to deliver another order to a man who was sitting a few benches away.

Y/n felt a shiver all of a sudden, that boy had made her legs a little weak and she didn't really know why. I mean, he was handsome, very handsome and he had a special charm, but it wasn't that much, was it? Maybe it was because it had been a while since she'd dated anyone. When was the last time? Two months ago? Since she had moved in she hadn't gone out with anyone, she had locked herself in her apartment and was writing like crazy. She didn't have time to go out, not even with her friends when she was working on a new book. Which brought them dissatisfaction from time to time, not just because she didn't hang around with them, but because she didn't even go out on one-night stands.

She never been the one that going out with a guy just for sex, she had to have some good first dates and maybe she would take him to see her apartment or go to his apartment. Friends of hers thought she was too old in her spirit, but what can he do? If she couldn't be bad girl once in a while. For a moment she thought, "For this english guy I would be" but shook her head away from the thoughts. She went back to analyzing him, dammit why did he have to be so fit? She could see that the T-shirt he was wearing highlighted his muscles that were only left to her imagination, she found herself biting her lip a bit and snatching her martini off the counter, taking a big sip.

The attendant approached again, drying some glasses with a towel, and took one more look in her direction where she looked away quickly making him smirk. He stopped in front of her again, bracing her arms on the counter, making her swallow hard. He didn't know why she was so nervous, he was just a guy, no biggie.

- I like the shirt. - He pointed with a smile, which made her think he had a beautiful and endearing smile. She looked down and then looked at him smiling too.

- Thank you... Ramones is everything... - she said and drank the last sip of her drink placing the empty glass in front of her right after. - Can you serve one more?

- Sure...- he said, still smiling, took the bottle and filled his glass again. - Trying to distract yourself on a thursday night?

- Yeah... you could say yes... - she said taking another sip. - Have you worked here for a long time?

- In fact, it's been almost six months since I moved to the United States and I've been working here for four months. -he said putting the towel that was in his hand on his shoulder.

- Hm... You're from London?

- I am, wow how did you find out? - he asked raising an eyebrow playfully and she smiled.

- Yeah, your accent really doesn't give out anything ... - she said and he gave a low laugh making her have more goose bumps.

- You also have a different accent, have you lived here for a long time? - he didn't know who she was, which was good. But it also wasn't like she was recognized all the time, despite her face being on magazine covers, she was still a writer, so she was only recognized by those who liked to read or who vaguely remembered her face.

- I was born in Brazil actually, but I've lived here for years, lived in another city for almost five years and now I've decided to come to Los Angeles two months ago...

- I see ... - he said organizing some drinks that were on the counter. - Do you like it here?

- More or less... It's a busy city, isn't it?

- Yeah, it's not for anyone. - He said shrugging. - I like it, I like the rush, but the glamor part really isn't me. - the attendant said and she smiled.

- You're right... I mean, I don't like the glam too much either... - She looked away at her nails.

- What do you work with? - he asked and she looked at him again.

- I'm a writer...

- Nice! What do you write? - He asked curious looking at her with attention.

- I write horror and thriller books.

- Interesting... I would never read, actually I'm not much of a reader anyway, but I wouldn't, because I'm terrified of those things. - He said crossing his arms and she laughed.

- Oh, it's not that terrifying, it's just stories. - She said leaning her elbows on the counter.

- Still, I prefer to have my good night's sleep intact. - He said and she laughed making him smile looking at her.

When she was about to say something, a customer signaled for him and he excused himself going towards the man who was furthest away.

Y/n sighed. She still didn't have any new ideas about her story, but she was entertained by that conversation. She liked not being recognized, she liked him not being interested in her books, for a moment she felt oblivious to anything, liked feeling disconnected from her world.

He returned shortly after and they started talking again. They talked about bands, movies, superficial celebrities and even politics (an important topic in Y/n's vision, who was very firm with her ideas, thankfully he had passed the test). She found out that he was the same age as her and that he moved to the US to look for something that would give him money or a perspective on life, ended up getting that job and intended to stay until he found a different area. The hours passed and they kept finding subjects to give their opinion or questions to ask each other.

- Did you go to college? - she asked after a while.

- No, I don't think I'm smart enough for that, or have the patience. What about you?

- Everyone is smart enough. I started going to business school, but I dropped out when my books started to pay off...

- Wow, your books should give you a good amount of money to be able to drop out of college and dedicate yourself to them...

- Yeah... You could say that. - She shrugged.

- You know looking at you closer like that...- he said getting a little closer and she held her breath for a moment. - I've seen you somewhere...

- Really? - She said raising her eyebrow and drinking from a straw, now with a different drink.

- I don't know, you're not strange to me... - he said putting his hand on his face thoughtfully.

- Well, I hope it's from somewhere nice. - She smiled and he smiled back looking at her. - Do you have a girlfriend or are you married? - Y/n asked and regretted a little, what was she thinking? He wasn't married, as he didn't have a ring on his finger as she'd noticed. But what was her intention by asking that question? She didn't even know, she just knew it had escaped her.

- Neither darling. - He replied smiling a little mischievously and she felt butterflies with the way he called her by that nickname and with that accent. - How about you?

- Neither ... - She replied avoiding looking at him, those eyes hypnotized her and she didn't like to feel at his mercy of a guy she had just met. She took the cell phone disguising but paid attention to the time. - My God, it's already 2:00 in the morning! I completely missed the time.

- I think the company ended up distracting you. - He said still not taking his eyes off her and she felt her cheeks heat up.

- Yeah, the chat was really good... But I have to go... - she said getting up.

- If you wait I can take you home, I'm already leaving, the bar is already closing. - he said and Y/n looked around seeing that some waiters were already collecting some things from the tables.

She thought for a moment, take a ride home with him? It didn't make sense, she had just met him, but at the same time she had enjoyed talking to him so much. He didn't seem like a bad person, but even so you would never know for sure. At the same time she never took any chances, why not let that pretty boy take her home? Finally, she thought: you know what? Screw this.

-Erm, ok...- She shrugged. - I'll go to the cashier to pay and wait for you outside?

- No need to pay darling, it's on me. - He spoke winking and she smiled.

- Oh no, I'll pay no problem...

- Your company has paid off your debt, it's ok. - He replied and she took a deep breath rolling her eyes.

- If you insist...- she said giving up.

He came out from behind the counter and motioned for her to follow him, arriving at the front door where the security was.

- Tuwaine, you can let her pass, it's on me. - He told the big guy and he looked at the english man, sawing his eyes suspiciously and smiling right away. Making Y/n laugh inside.

- Meet you outside? It will only take a few minutes - the attendant said and she nodded, leaving in the cold night.

She leaned against the door with her thoughts. She had come here just to get inspiration and to have her creative back, but she was coming home with an english guy. She didn't even recognize herself anymore, but to say she wasn't anxious (in a good way) was a lie.

She was lost in her thought, until minutes later he came out wearing a denim jacket, which made him look even more handsome.

- Let's go? - He said and she followed him to an old car parked right in front of the bar.

He opened the door for her to get in and she thanked him by sitting in the passenger seat, pulling on her seat belt as he closed the door. He sat down next to her right away, also putting on his belt.

- Hey, before we go: I didn't ask for your name! If you're going to take me home at least I have to know that- she asked realizing that she didn't even know that yet and he looked towards her smiling.

- Tom Holland. - He said stretching his hand. - Nice to meet you.

- Y/n Y/l/n- she said, squeezing his hand. And you can't deny that she felt butterflies in her stomach as she felt her skin on hers.

- Your name is not strange to me, I must have read it in one of your books in some shop window. - He said starting and leaving with the car.

- Yeah, who knows ... - she said and he turned on the radio leaving the volume low.

They were exchanging a few words until she indicated that they had arrived at the building where she lived. Tom parked and looked up in a daze.

- Wow, you really have money... - he said and she took off her belt turning towards him.

- A little bit...- she replied crossing her arms. - Well, thank you so much for the ride...

- You're welcome darling. - He said turning his eyes to her. Again that nickname that sounded perfect on his lips.

She turned around, but when she was about to open the door, she turned back to Tom, who was leaning with one hand on the steering wheel and watching her with attention. The next words escaped her again and she was afraid she'd regret it.

- Tom, do you want to come in? - She spoke still holding the door and the boy smiled.

- Sure ... - he said taking the key from the ignition and she shook her head slightly leaving.

He followed her and they entered the building. Tom looked at everything admired which made Y/n smile a little to herself. They entered the elevator and she pressed the penthouse button causing him to raise an eyebrow.

- You really must be a great writer. - he said and she laughed.

He leaned his back against the elevator wall, putting his hands in his pocket and looking her up and down, making her shy. He kept looking at her and it was making her nervous.

They were silent until the elevator opened after a while and they got out. Y/n put a password on the door and it swung open with a small click, she took held the latch and motioned for Tom to enter.

After the two of them entered she closed the door again behind her and watched Tom standing further on, looking around.

- Nice apartment...- he finally said.

- Thank you... - She leaned against the table at the entrance. She didn't know what to do next, maybe it had been a bad idea to bring him here. Why was she so impulsive that night? -Tom, I don't know why I invite you in, sorry...-she said a little nervous looking at her feet. He turned towards her, approaching and stopping in front of her.

- Are you sure you don't know? - He asked and she raised her head, seeing those brown eyes. She bit her bottom lip watching him closely. Damn he knew how to hypnotize her. He took another step and placed a hand on either side of her on the table, cornering her - Your body says otherwise, love... - he said softly feeling her breath hitch slowly and approaching his face to hers, alternating the look of your eyes to her lips. Y/n found another nickname that was perfect when he say.

He finally closed the distance by pressing his lips to hers. His lips were soft and warm, as if they were meant to be kissed. She returned the kiss willingly and when she laced her fingers in his neck, he licked her lower lip slowly asking for passage in which she opened them letting his tongue explore her mouth.

His hands gripped her waist and roamed her body greedily. As he kissed her, he caught her from behind her legs and sat her down on the entrance table, biting her bottom lip shortly after, provoking a low moan from her. He smiled against her lips and trailed kisses to her neck, attacking her skin with desire, making her throw her head back a little.

She grabbed his hair and pulled him back so she could kiss him. Which he gladly reciprocate. His kiss was urgent, but without being rude, he tasted like mint, making her want him even more.

His fingers found the button of her pants and he undid them quickly pulling them out, tossing them aside. When he came back he took her calf and kissed her leg up to her thighs, making her sigh. He moved up the kisses until he caught the hem of her shirt and pulled it up a little, kissing her stomach as well. Y/n didn't know what to do but feel goose bumps with every touch he gave. He then hiked up her shirt and she lifted her arms where he pulled her off, tossing along with her pants that were also on the floor.

She was just wearing her underwear in front of him, it made her a little excited and embarrassed at the same time, but the way he looked at her made her feel confident. He went back to kissing her body, this time kissing each covered breast in turn and reaching for the back of her bra and opening it. She helped him out tosiing to the side and he stood between her legs just watching her for a second, making her feel her cheeks heat up.

- Perfect... - he said with a low voice, as it was for himself and bent down to her breasts kissing each one of her nipples and then sucking them deliciously. Y/n moaned and bit her lip to keep her moans from getting louder, tangling her fingers in his hair again. He looked into her eyes for a few seconds and smiled slightly lowering his kisses to where she wanted him most.

He reached the hem of her panties and pulled them out slowly, kneeling between her legs and she looked at him with expectation. He returned the look and gave that smirk again.

- Look at you darling.... - That damn nickname. - Extremely wet and I haven't even touched you yet... - he said approaching and devouring her right away making her throw her head back with pleasure, biting her lips again to not sound so pathetic with her moans that insisted in wanting get out. - Oh, please don't drown out those wonderful sounds you make, I want to hear how good I'm making you feel. - He said in a husky tone, returning to his task after and she parted her lips letting her moans spread through the apartment.

****************************************************************************************

Y/n woke up the other day in her bed. She didn't even know how she got there, she just had flashes of the night before and how good she felt in each moment. She stretched and looked to the side seeing she was alone. She got up and put on a robe who was on the side of the bed.

After going to the bathroom and doing her morning hygiene routine she walked around the apartment looking around to see if Tom was somewhere else in the house, but found nothing. Which was understandable, it wasn't like she expected him to stay there and have breakfast with her and all.

She arrived in the kitchen and made black coffee and lean against the countertop. What that simple waiter had done to her was ridiculous, in a good sense, she felt great and kept remembering that accent that was stuck in her mind. He had consumed her in a way she had never imagined it she could be.

Taking a deep breath she set down turning her notebook on. Then opened her book and started writing.

[ask-the-fandom-anything]

How do you look at the relationship between Phospho and Sohone? It seems to me that they have friendly and family relations (like father and son, or whatever). I think that after his death, Phospho could move to the Dream World and help the inhabitants cope with nightmares, and Sohone is no exception. I really like to think that Phospho's self-sacrifice had a huge impact on this guy. They could become good friends or family. Phospho could support Sohone in difficult situations, especially when he has nightmares. Sohone would have an identity crisis after the snake incident. He would begin to gradually go crazy with nightmares. He would find it difficult to hide his pain from those around him and shared his problems with his friends. They would support him and help in any way they could. I also like to think that sometimes in a dream Sohone sees his dark side and not only in a dream, but also snakes could make cracks in him and crawl into the soul, an unbearable pain pleasant to the guy. But he dreamed not only of snakes, but also of Necross or any version of the death of his friends and he could not do anything. And one of his dreams is his mother, who accuses her son of all mortal sins. It is possible that in childhood, Sohone's parents ignored their own son as much as possible (maybe even his father, after the death of his mother, raised his hand to him, shouted and drank, but this is not certain), and the children cherished, and he, in turn, began to close the lack of attention with popularity. This, by the way, explains why Seoheon acted arrogant throughout the entire cartoon. And also I like to think that after the battle with Necross, he had cracks and wounds on his body and face, and sometimes he felt pain all over his body. Sohone could begin to think that he was not a good enough Guardian Of The Sun and think that perhaps the luminary had mistaken him. He will begin to think that he is really worse than all the Guardians Of The Sun in the world and saw a demon in himself. I think this could make for an interesting conflict for the character if a "Mune: Guardian of the Moon" series came out. It would be cool. It's a pity that Sohone wasn't revealed much. And I'm even offended that he is as popular in June as Mune and Glim. (Как ты смотришь на отношения Фосфо и Сохона. Мне кажется, что они у них дружеские и семейные отношения (как у отца и сына или дела кому как). Думаю, после своей смерти Фосфо мог переместиться в Мир Снов и помогать жителям справляться с кошмарами и Сохон не исключение. Мне очень нравится думать, что самопожертвования Фосфо очень сильно повлияло на этого парня. Они бы могли стать хорошими друзьями или семьёй. Фосфо мог бы поддерживать Сохона в трудных ситуациях, особенно, когда ему сняться ночные кошмары. У Сохона бы начался бы кризис личности, после инцидента со змеями. Он бы начал постепенно сходить с ума от кошмаров. Ему было бы трудно скрывать свою боль от окружающих и поделился со своими проблемами с друзьями. Они бы его поддержали и помогли, чем смогли. Ещё мне нравится думать, что иногда во сне Сохон видит свою тёмную сторону и не только во сне, а также змеи могли бы проделывать в нем трещины и заползать в душу, приятная парню невыносимую боль. Но ему снились не только змеи, но и Некрос или любой вариант смерти его друзей и он ничего не мог сделать. И один из снов ему сниться его мама, которая обвиняет своего сына во всех смертных грехах. Возможно, что его в детстве родители Сохона максимально и��норировали собственного сына (может быть даже его отец после смерти матери поднимал на него руку, кричал и выпивал, но это не точно), а дети лилеяли, а он в свою очередь начал закрывать недостаток внимание популярностью . Это кстати и объясняет, почему Сохон вёл себя высокомерно на протяжении всего мультфильма. А также мне нравится думать, что после битвы с Некросом у него остались трещины и раны на теле и лице и иногда он чувствовал боль во всём теле. Сохон мог начать думать в том, что он недостаточно хороший страж Солнца и думать о том, что возможно светило ошиблось им. Он

начнет думать, что действительно хуже всех стражей Солнца на свете и видель в себе демона. Думаю, из этого можно было сделать интересный конфликт для персонажа, если бы вышел сериал по "Мьюн: Страж Луны". Это было бы круто. Жаль, что Сохона мало расскрыли. И мне даже обидно, что он июне так популярнен, как Мьюн и Глим.)

Well the relationship I see between Phospho and sohone is like family and I do think he could be in the dream world helping get rid of all the monsters and he could support sohone problem when he either has. Nightmares or the fear of something or even memory’s he wished he couldn’t see, all though he should have some scars to represent the fight with necross and to see that he’s not always the best at everything but he tries and it would be a great one if there were a series of this cartoon though it’s really sad how people don’t talk about sohone as much as Mune, like no one does AUs or talk about this movie.

[ghostbustermelanieking]

oddly specific memories i have of listening to tma

in honor of the finale, and because i am a sentimental asshole, i bring you this potentially uninteresting and completely pointless list. i'm gonna miss this show a lot

half my original reasoning for listening to the podcast was to motivate me to walk on the treadmill. this did not work. but i did it the first time, when i was going through the trailers and anglerfish, and i remember the room where my dad keeps the treadmill is really dark and the spooky chanting sort of freaked me out

after the treadmill, i ended up listening to the bulk of the first four episodes on the couch, and halfway through i let my oldest cat, winnie, who always lived outside (i know, i was very against actually keeping her outside) in the house. and she jumped up on the couch with me, which she literally never did. (she was very grumpy and not super affectionate.) i had that cat since i was five, and she passed last june, and i really miss her. quarantine kind of gave us the opportunity to hang out with her a lot, because we were home so much. so i'm glad these memories are kind of intersected in my mind. (below: a pic i have from that day.)

my friend sarah relistened along with me the first time around, which was extraordinarily sweet of her, and also led to some interesting interactions. for example: she forgot when it was revealed that sasha was dead, so she accidentally spoiled that for me when i asked when the others would find sasha (and i spent all of season 2 just like. anxiously vibrating over this fact). she also made this post, when i was still in like early first half of season 1, and my immediate thought was "oh no martin is dead." i hadnt even MET martin at this point

back in early quarantine, my mom had this rule that we had to do something new every day (to keep away the depression... ha ha). anyways, all i wanted to do in my free time was sit around and listen to tma (and also watch this show i was into on netflix), so i came up with some lame excuses, one of which was "i'll give myself a pedicure." this led to the memory i ultimately associate with mag 56 (trevor herbert 2) being me sitting out on our roof balcony thing, giving myself a horrendous pedicure

another time, my family wanted to go play tennis, and they brought me along and brought a hammock for me to lay in. there was this excess material from the hammock, and the sun was in my eyes, so i ended up pulling it up and over me to block the sun and creating this ridiculous hammock cocoon thing. one of the episodes i listened to that day? "tucked in."

before i ever started the show, my friend sarah stayed with me while i was pet sitting. i remember when she got there, she'd just listened to 150 and was telling me how freaky it was (she was still trying to get me into the show), and she was like "of course we're staying on a CUL DE SAC." (that was also the weekend she watched us for the first time and was very upset because i slept through the whole thing, which is scary when you're staying somewhere by yourselves.) anyways, i spent the whole show waiting for the scary cul de sac episode

while i was listening to the show for the first time, my step-dad (an artist) started painting an EYE on the door downstairs near my bathroom. a fucking EYE. he didn't finish it til i had finished the show. but still weird!!

i binged like 12 episodes in one day to finish season 4, which is not impressive at all, but it's still my personal record. i just remember staying up late in my dark bedroom (til like.... 11 i'm lame and i go to bed early), listening to like 158 & 159 & 160 and just being knocked on my ass by how good it all was... i was SUPER spoiled by this point, through my own fault, and i knew exactly what was coming, but actually experiencing it was nuts

the second week i listened live was 167, where the public release was delayed by a couple hours by accident. i spent like 20 minutes refreshing spotify, thinking it was broken, before going on tumblr and seeing what the deal was. (and 167 remains one of my favorites of s5 because i remember just going "thank god it was worth the wait.")

this one car ride where sarah and i made some of our friends listen to the first three episodes of the show. it was the middle of the night and we were just like blasting down i40 listening to anglerfish and do not open etc

the night the what the ghost episode publicly dropped was the night after my graduation, and i was sleeping out on the couch in the living room so my grandfather could sleep in a bed. it was super dark, and i am a jumpy person, and i Remember being mildly disgusted with myself because the corny sound effects were actually freaking me out. (i think i mightve actually seen something weird that night, maybe, but that's another story.)

the weekend my parents moved me into college, we couldn't get the cable in the house we were staying in, and we were all sitting around doing nothing, so i jokingly suggested starting tma with them, and they were like ok grace. my step-dad promptly fell asleep and my mom zoned out -- which is probably good, she doesn't like horror and she's super claustrophobic, so it's probably better we never got to do not open

my brief roommate in college talked about how she was into those youtube channels where people just read scary stories, so of course i was like try tma out. so she listened to the first episode on her own, and we were out one night, and she started mag 02 while i went into an ice cream place. she was into it (she kept being like open it, ya pussy) and wanted to keep listening while we went home, and even back in our room. i had only been in town for a couple weeks, and barely knew my way around, but i also didn't want to turn the gps on and be interrupted every five seconds. so i tried to find our way back on my own. it took the entirety of mag 03, and into mag 04, before i did it. so now i will forever associate across the street with all those wrong turns i took in a dark, semi unfamiliar city, trying to get back to our college without a gps

the day of the early drop for 179 was the day i moved back home from college -- a five hour drive by myself. i ended up listening to it on the final stretch of the trip, when i was super tired and it was dark and i knew it'd probably be a crazy episode. just me full blasting down i40, drinking an energy drink (which i never do) through a hole punched in the top, listening to daisy's death

186 early dropped the day after initial u.s. election day (when we still didn't know anything). my mom had set up a "watch party" in the living room with these giant air mattresses, and we all sort of spent the day crowded around the TV watching the numbers. not much of a memory, but i remember sitting on that air mattress and listening to martin's monologue in the midst of that messy week

i had a virtual therapy appointment on the day of 187's early drop, and my dad was home, so i drove to an empty parking lot to do the session in some privacy. i was trying to listen to the episode before the session started, so i ended up listening to the last half sitting in my car, in the pouring rain, just staring at my radio in shock (187 remains one of my favorite s5 episodes)

my friend sarah had just come home for winter break the day 189 dropped, and we decided to listen together, just like driving around in circles drinking coffee and listening and speculating on whether or not that was really martin

i started my relisten right after thanksgiving and was just kind of blowing through fast as i could through the whole of december. i had to go back to college to empty out my dorm, and i went to the beach after, and i ended up listening to mag 11 while just like walking around in circles in the tide pools. the closer it got to christmas, the more christmassy i wanted to keep things, so i would like. listen in the mornings and turn on one of those Netflix fireplaces and get all cozy

my other friend went with me on a mini bagel road trip in december, and he was still trying to get caught up, so we listened to mag 169, 170, and 171 on the drive home. (by this point, i was accustomed enough to s5 and smiting scenes to automatically reach for the volume controls when jude perry and jared hopworth died.)

when i relistened to mag 47, i was sitting with my cat beezus. i paused the episode to write this big long meta, so i was in a different headspace when i pressed play again. jon immediately yelled for sasha and i immediately jumped, and beezus gave me a searing glare and just got up and left

i relistened to piecemeal while i was cooking, which i thought was kind of funny and also disgusting

after christmas, i got into the habit of bringing my cat georgia into my room in the mornings, and she'd crawl under the covers with me while i listened to tma

one story i've always liked to tell from my first listen is how when i first listened to the meat arm grinder episode, my dad asked me to help him cook hamburgers later that day and explained how hamburgers are ground up (to my disgust). i hit meat grinder in my relisten and um. you'll never fucking guess what i made for lunch that day

so i had all these arbitrary rules for myself when i started tma last april, and i've broken like all of them. i started listening to tma while virtually working -- you just pull it up on your computer and it works. (i got the life scared out of me when one of my coworkers started talking over the podcast, wondering who it was that had walked into jon's office and why he wasn't reacting and why i didn't remember it.) i also started listening a lot while driving, which led to several long meta posts i wrote being typed up in a parking lot somewhere

i spent the entirety of 194 anxious-cuddling georgia. (i tried to do this for 198 and then didn't have any anxiety to cuddle her over.) i fully plan on doing this for 200, where i am sure i will need it again

my favorite place to listen to tma probably ended up being the roof room at my mom's, and unless something goes awry, this is where i will listen to the finale. (with georgia, of course.)

this list is super uninteresting, like i said, but here it is. i'm gonna miss this show a lot. i can't wait to return to it, later in life, and make all new listening memories in the process

[syandreanamarie-blog]

THANKS, DAD.

Choosing a school to spend my Senior High School years at was really hard, especially because picking a strand to take was also confusing on my part. I had to choose between pursuing my passion for music which is under the Arts & Design Track, or my passion for writing that's under the HUMSS strand—the school I'm going to pick kind of depended on that. After months of contemplating whichever path best suited me, I realized that I still wasn't confident or even good enough to showcase my gift in the field of music, so I decided to be a humanista.

I wanted to be a HUMSS student in Centro Escolar University. I have a friend who studies there, and I was convinced that the said university was pretty much my ideal school just by listening to her stories. I was also jealous of their cute cotton candy-like uniform, and have already imagined myself wearing one. At that point, I felt complacent for I already have everything planned in my mind, but all my hype was lost when my dad told me to reconsider my plans. :(

"Ang layo layo no'n! Baka may mangyari pang masama sa'yo. Hanap ka nalang ng mas malapit."

My family suggested that I should just go to the same school as my ate's. I was hesitant at first because I had this crazy assumption that since the T in T.I.P. stands for Technological, then the institute will then not be prioritizing my strand which isn't focused on that T. (I hope that made sense)

I went to my ate's graduation this year and for some unknown reason, I felt a feeling of belongingness. By the time when everyone was singing the T.I.P. fight song, I have made up my mind. The next thing I knew, I was already enrolled.

My first day in Technological Institute of the Philippines was both good and bad. My introverted self felt extremely anxious and exhausted the whole day. Adjusting was hard, so as the fact that I had to spend the whole school year with the strangers around me. I also didn't know how I'll be able to go from our house to school and vice versa daily because I'm not used to commuting. I just couldn't help but think of nothing but negative thoughts that time but hey, surviving that uncomfortable day was already an achievement, I guess? (that's it for the 'good' part)

Several months have passed, I am already at ease. The teachers' skills in teaching made me realize that I made the right choice in choosing T.I.P. as the source of food for my hungry knowledge. The clean environment and disciplined people in the institute succeeded in making the whole place feel safe and really like a second home too. I'm glad my dad interfered with my plans before. If he didn't, I wouldn't have met these amazing people who I now consider very dear to me. Thanks, Dad.

They were nothing but strangers on the 10th day of June this year, but I now have them as my spring of love, support and comfort whenever and wherever. The friends I met here are very cool and interesting people. They vary in their personalities, talents, and interests, but their differences are what makes up the harmonious relationship we have.

I'm really grateful for everyone I met here, especially for Samantha Valledor who's like a sister to me already despite knowing her for only less than a year.

Spending a day without you at school is no fun, Sam.

I have two semesters and a half left to finish before leaving this place. That's still plenty of time for new learnings, experiences, and encounters. In those 15 months, I'm looking forward to finally come out of my comfort zone and be the best version of myself. If ever things will not turn out as I want it to, I will just let it be for I put my trust in Him who is in control of my life. I'm not even halfway through my journey yet, but I am certain that the memories I'm creating in this school will surely leave a mark in my heart and mind.

Like what the song says, your teachings and caring, I’ll always remember. My teachers and friends, I’ll always treasure, and I definitely will cherish the good times we’ve spent together.

T.I.P., do know that you’ll be in my heart forever.

[serenagaywaterford]

1) Hey, it's me again. The idiot rambling anon. I wasn't gonna spam you again, but then I read your responses. At this point, I'm convinced you're my alter ego, lol. My thoughts are all over the place, but I'll try to organize them. So, about Nick. I've purposely avoided talking about him so far, but why the hell not? Let me make one thing clear: I'm NOT of of those thirsty fangirls. But even if I was? I wouldn't get offended or butthurt, because another person likes different fictional

2) characters (of all things) than me. I mean, big fucking deal. Each to their own, no need for apologies. ;) (My tone is a little aggressive, I know, but I’m sick and tired of some people on social media –in and out of fandoms– acting holier-than-thou and sending hate messages and even actual death threats (!) to creators or people that express unpopular opinions*. It’s reached a point where many people feel the need to put disclaimers in their posts so as not to be attacked.)

3) Back to Nick. I liked him just fine back in early S1, when he was all mysterious and his background story was unknown to us. When we did learn about it and the fandom started acting like he’s that pure, handsome angel uwu? Nah. Obviously, he’s no Fred/Serena/Lydia,but he’s not a “cinnamon roll” either. (Imo, the only decent dude on that show is Luke.) I mean, if Nick was SO altruistic, he wouldn’t have joined this job. Or even after everything went down, he could have tried to help other

4) handmaids without expecting anything in return. But no, he only helps June and that’s because he’s in love with her. I’m not blaming him for trying to survive under such circumstances, but I won’t idolize him either. Now, in s2? I’m kinda neutral about him. I don’t hate him, but I can’t say that I’m a fan either. Not gonna lie, he bores me at times, because he’s just… there. No sparks, no fireworks. Not sure if it’s the writing that doesn’t do the actor any favors, but his acting hasn’t

5) really drawn me in yet. A counterexample to this? Aunt Lydia. Her personality is despicable 98% of the time and yet. Dowd’s captivating performance makes me want to know so much more about her character.) On the other hand, I’m glad that June has someone (besides Rita) to back her up in that hellhole. She needs comfort and allies. But the whole ‘tRu Love 5eva" fanon thing? No, thanks. Not only it doesn’t fit the tone of the series, but I also believe that sharing an intense, forbidden love/

6) during such a shitstorm is not the same thing as keeping it alive after all is said and done (post-Gilead). Maybe they’ll stay together (as long as Nick doesn’t die), maybe they’ll fall apart. I can’t really see June romantically reconnecting with Luke either. After everything she’s been through… She’s a completely different person now. Unfortunately, the same things goes for Emily and her wife. Even though I’d love to see her interact with both her wife and her child in S3.

———

My inbox is so beautiful right now! Never, ever call yourself an idiot, my friend. (If you are, then so am I!) Brain twins, you see.

(Also sorry about this being out of order lol.)

I was trying not to talk about him too cos generally I just … I prefer not to think about him much. The fangirls, just, *sigh*. I try to avoid as much as possible in this fandom, esp on tumblr. Just hang out in my quiet little, not-Serena-hating corner. I always feel a need to put disclaimers these days cos as much as I don’t really care about random hate, I’d prefer not to have to deal with dogpiles or to look at it lmao. Like people can go around just hating on any character here–especially if they’re women–but say one critical (not even hateful) thing about their male fav and things just go off. 

I’m more than aware the majority of people don’t like Serena and think she’s the worst thing ever. And fair play! (I get it… cos I’m not delusional. She’s awful.) Each to their own. I don’t go around bitching at people who say shitty things or stuff I don’t agree with, or blocking anybody who doesn’t like her. (There are a few posts I do engage with cos normally they seem like they want to go deeper in The Discourse but most Serena/Lydia/Eden/Janine/June-hate I just ignore.)

ITA. S1 was, like, okay. That’s Nick. What’s he up to? What’s his deal? (I don’t really care but I’m not opposed to him either. Just like I didn’t care about Luke’s backstory/escape.) He’s trying to be good to June and she needs that.When we did learn his backstory I was not pleased cos he seemed like a twerp but whatevs. Grey characters are grey. It wasn’t until S2 that I started to get irked by him (and the hypocrisy of his fans but that’s a whole other issue). 

I can’t agree ANY more with your assessment of Nick. Like that’s EXACTLY what I’ve been saying! Firstly, he was RIGHT THERE when the Handmaid/Ceremony thing was first suggested and was like “Oh, yeah, great idea!” to Fred. I get that perhaps he was pressured to go along to keep his job but that’s a stretch imo, and if you can give him that sort of leeway, why can’t characters like Eden, Serena, Lydia and June get the same benefit of the doubt for certain things? Why is Nick’s pressure to keep his job more important and forgivable than anybody else’s pressures? It’s like that entire scene doesn’t exist to fangirls and Nick is so precious and in love and wonderful. Then there’s the rape of June. Like I know it’s pretty controversial to look at it that way, but that first time, with Serena overseeing it like a fucking creepy pimp (YUUUUUUCCCKKKKK I HATE IT THANKS) was rape. June barely knew the guy and I’m pretty sure if she wanted to have sex with him it wouldn’t be like that! And sure, after that, it was totally consensual but that first time was not. And I’ve heard the justification and excuses of “Well, Nick didn’t have a choice either!” which I call bullshit on, cos Nick is not some powerless delivery boy. 

He’s a fucking Guardian who is tight with the top Commanders. He’s a man, if nothing else. Serena can act all high and mighty but she’s still a woman in a highly misogynistic society. I’m not convinced Fred would take his wife’s word over Nick’s tbh, especially if it was like “Dude, your crazy wife asked me to fuck the Handmaid you’re obsessed with”. If he really didn’t want to do it that badly, he could have taken that chance to report Serena. Even if Fred wanted to keep it hush hush away from other Commanders, he would have gone after Serena. Men are far more likely to turn on women than each other, esp in THT. But that’s just my take. Maybe I am missing something about Nick’s status. To me, it was like double rape. Neither of them wanted to do it, like that anyway. But Nick also did fuck all to stop it when IMO he did have some power to do something. He is not a helpless victim in that society, imo. Again, probably not a well-received opinion. 

Don’t even get me started on his “Poor me!” routine in S2 when June tells him to have sex with Eden. I’m glad she called him on that bullshit. (But again, over the fangirls heads. Enough about them!)

Basically, everything Nick has done wrong isn’t his choice; he’s just a victim. In a story about women, Nick’s victimhood at the hands of these nasty women and men is the real issue. Blah. Whatever.

I just find Nick lacks total self-awareness about being part of the shitty ass system. He kind of just floats around thinking nothing is his fault and he’s blameless for it all, and he certainly can’t seem to see it from anyone’s perspective except his own. He’s upset about Fred & June’s Jezebel trips, not for her own safety or well-being but mainly he’s jealous. Of course he’s concerned about her safety but I believe it takes a backseat to his jealousy. He just seems to never take any responsibility for anything.

And BINGO about the previous Handmaid. Nothing we’ve been shown has given any hint he cares about any other woman’s plight in Gilead other than June, and only cares about her cos he had a crush/fucked her/is in wuv wiv her. Basically, she’s HIS so suddenly he cares about her. Look how fast he dumped that Martha as soon as he got brooding about June. He’s done fuckall for anybody except himself and that alone makes me dislike him. He’s no better than Fred in that way for me. But where Fred can occasionally be an interesting villain, cos Fiennes is nasty good, I find the actor who plays Nick just… not engaging. And he’s not SUPPOSED to be a villain! He’s meant to be a good guy! It’s crazy. He’s not compelling, he’s not interesting. He’s bland. He’s not even good looking, lol. I was watching with a friend once and mention I thought Fred was way better looking than Nick and she just stared at me and said, “You shouldn’t say that. But me too.” So, count me in the camp that just does not get the appeal of the character OR the actor.

I don’t hate Nick generally. I am just totally indifferent to his existence. If he left the show tomorrow, I’d shrug and probably be a little glad I don’t have to see that bland moping anymore. If he stays, oh well. Shrug. And I just don’t want his and June’s star-crossed romance shoved down my throat. It’s so… I dunno. I’m not opposed to June finding solace and hope but making it some beautiful forbidden romance, I’m not buying it. Like you said, it’s all well and good in Gilead–but it doesn’t strike me as something that can be sustainable outside it. To borrow from you last time: It’s the Handmaid’s Tale, not The Guardian + the Handmaid’s Tale.

Okay, enough about that pipsqueak. I don’t even like talking about him, tbh. He’s not worth it when there’s so much else going on.

ITA about Luke/June too. I feel like the level of disconnection and trauma that they’ve sustained, especially June, they can try to reconnect but it’s pretty difficult and I think especially with June having a sexual/romantic relationship with Nick pulls that really tight. It’s just two different planets they live on now. I don’t doubt that she still loves Luke, but actually reforming the relationship they previously had seems like an impossible task considering everything both of them have been through. It’s sad, but … sadly true for many people. Relationships can fall apart for far less.

And on the same page about Emily/Sylvia too. She is just soooooo fucking broken, and hopeless, that if they have them just rekindle with no issues, it’ll be bad writing. (I dunno if you see spoilers but there’s one about them.) She needs therapy so much more than a cutesy feelgood storyline.

Back to Lydia: Exactly! There’s a character we know very little about and who is a horrible person, yet the performance by Dowd makes almost everyone go, “TELL ME MORE!” With Nick, it’s the opposite for me. I’m just like, “Please, less of this.”

[headoverheelss]

The Song The Birds Sang | Chapter 5: Friendship

Tags: Mentions of Bullying, Child Abuse, Neglect, Eating Disorder, Everybody Lives Au, No-Upside Down, Eddie and Chrissy are brother and sister energy, Graduation, OOC Summary: Chrissy graduates and introduces Eddie to a couple of special people. Eddie unknowingly gains a new friendship with Steve Harrington. Notes: This one kind of away from me but I hope you all like it!!

That day in detention sparked something between the two boys. Eddie wouldn't call Steve a friend but more like an acquaintance. Whenever Steve passed him in the hall, Eddie would give him a nod which got acknowledged then they would go about their days.

Eddie noticed that Steve was starting to become distant from the jocks in a way. Sure he still sat at the designated popular kids' table but it would be away from the antics. Sometimes there would be a girl or two keeping him company but other than that Steve wouldn't interact with anyone.

He started hearing about the way King Steve had changed from his friends one day.

It was April, they were at Danny's house since his mom didn't care that they took over the garage with their band practices. They were taking a break, it was hot and Danny's mom didn't want them to pass out.

"You know," Kevin put down his soda, "King Steve has been awfully quiet lately."

Danny nodded, "Yea, he only says things when any of his other asshole friends say shit besides that he's been really chill."

His friends continued chattering to each other while he sipped his soda.

Maybe my advice worked on him?

It warmed Eddie's heart that the jock took his advice seriously. He liked to think maybe in another time or place then they could be friends.

Maybe.

----

The end of Eddie's Sophomore Year was coming fast which made him excited. He had never been busier. Luckily, he didn't get any detentions or suspensions not that it meant he didn't get in trouble.

He had learned how to just do it away from prying eyes.

The band was booked to play some shows over the summer. Kevin had come to him saying that he knew an incoming Freshman by the name of Gareth that would be perfect on drums. Eddie decided to have him at the next practice so the boy could try out for them.

Gareth was a little bit smaller than him with a head of curls. He still looked like a baby but Eddie could see the potential, especially cause Gareth was interested in playing DnD, Hellfire needed more members, and the kid was amazing at the drums.

Eddie slapped Gareth on the back welcoming him to Corroded Coffin.

The summer excitement could be felt among the students at Hawkins High. Eddie was meeting with at least 10 students every day he had to bring lunch out in the forest with him.

He wasn't complaining. The extra money was needed since he was saving up for a car and Chrissy's graduation present.

His birthday was coming up in June. Eddie was always embarrassed because he was one of the youngest in his grade. This might be a reason why they targeted him but nonetheless, it was driving him crazy waiting to turn 16.

Danny and Kevin were already both 16 and had their license. Eddie only had his permit so he was left practicing every Sunday with Uncle Wayne.

All he wanted to do was have his license and car so Uncle Wayne wouldn't have to worry about him so much. In addition, it would be nice to have a little freedom and he could hang out with Chrissy more.

Speaking of Chrissy, the younger girl was extremely nervous. Graduation was fast approaching. Every time Eddie saw her, she looked like she hadn't slept in weeks.

There was a Wednesday in May which was two weeks before graduation. Chrissy was hanging out with Eddie after school.

They were doing homework at the kitchen counter. Chrissy had brought up the topic of Steve.

"So have you talked to him since you know," She leaned forward, her tone teasing, "the whole detention thing."

Eddie scoffed, ignoring the blush that started spreading across his face, "No, I mean...I've said hi to him in the halls but nothing too long. He's always with a girl," Eddie tried not to let the jealously leak into his voice, "but he has been quieter."

"What do you mean?"

Eddie sighed, trying to find the right words, "Well, it's like he's being less like a dickhead and I'm not the only one who has noticed."

Chrissy furrowed her eyebrows, "I'll believe it when I see it. He was a real douchebag at school. I was always so surprised so many girls liked him."

Eddie chuckled, turning back to his essay, "Speaking of douchebags. Has Jason been bothering you?"

The younger girl groaned, "No...I mean...He's stopped all the questions and stuff. I just wished he would stop staring at me."

Jason had taken the cold shoulder pretty hard. Eddie was prepared to step in once when he saw Jason get on Chrissy's nerves but she had stood her ground. Eddie was proud of her.

"And you won't tell me about these mystery crushes, of yours?" Eddie knocked into her shoulder playfully.

Chrissy's face turned red. She shook her head. Eddie took it as a sign of not wanting to talk anymore.

They enjoyed a couple more minutes of silence. Eddie took a long look at her. Her hair was pulled back in a ponytail, there were dark circles under her eyes, and he didn't like how exhausted she looked. Like she could break at any second, Eddie pushed his textbook away.

"So I know you're reaching that age when you start talking back but I just wanted to know," Eddie took his hand in hers, "is everything okay at home?"

Chrissy sighed, "You noticed didn't you?"

Eddie rubbed the back of her hand gently, "It's getting bad again...isn't it?"

The younger girl felt tears start to fill her eyes, and her lip trembled, "It's like nothing I do is ever good for her, Eddie. And I'm so tired that I just don't want to..." Her voice faded out. Eddie already filling in the word she left out.

He got up from his seat, moving towards his best friend. Eddie wrapped his arms around her, feeling her start to cry silently into his chest.

"I'm sorry, Chris. They don't deserve you and whenever you feel like you need to get out, just know that there is always a space here for you."

Eddie rubbed soothing circles into her back, waiting for her cries to subside. When she was done, Chrissy looked up at him. A sad smile graced her face.

"Thanks, Eddie."

"Anytime, Chris," He clapped his hands together, "How about some tomato soup and grilled cheese?"

Chrissy nodded her head happily. Tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches were always her comfort food. Eddie always made sure to have all ingredients on hand just in case.

He hoped that the graduation coming up would be a happy event for Chrissy. The girl deserved it.

-----

Two weeks flew by. Eddie found himself stuffed inside Hawkins middle school's gym. He had tried to fix himself up for the occasion but it was hard since he didn't exactly own a suit. He wore a nice dress shirt and pants.

There were people all over so Eddie stuck himself far away so that he wouldn't be approached by Chrissy's parents. If he did, it wouldn't bode well for any of them. He didn't want Chrissy getting mad at him on her special day.

He was in the corner which was secluded but not too far that he wasn't unable to see her. The music started, and everybody fell into a silent hush as they watched the graduates walk in.

Eddie spotted her right away. She was in the front since her last name started with C. Chrissy looked nervous, her eyes scanned the crowd looking for somebody.

Eddie stood up, knowing that she wasn't looking for her parents. Once she spotted him, Chrissy gave him a big bright smile. She turned back around, the tension gone from her body.

The procession went fast. Eddie thought that maybe the school wanted to get this over with.

"CHRISSY CUNINGHAM!"

Eddie stood up, clapping and yelling loudly. Chrissy gave him a little wave. Embarrassment and love were evident on her face. Eddie didn't pay attention to the rest of the names. He was filled with too much excitement. He wanted to see Chris already. The present he got her was in his back pocket next to a card from Uncle Wayne.

The throwing of caps and the excited shouts of middle schoolers turning into high schoolers brought his attention back down to Earth. The ceremony was done. Chrissy had done it.

Eddie got up from his seat, making his way to stand on the opposite wall of the gym. He knew not to bother Chrissy now. She was probably with her parents but he trusted her to sneak away.

Her parents wouldn't make a scene in front of all these people. They had a reputation to uphold. It made Eddie hate them even more.

He watched the crowd in front of him. All the kids talked to each other excitedly. Parents watched on proudly as they took pictures. Nobody paid any attention to him. He did get some curious glances from some but others were too scared to look at him.

He did see Gareth with his parents. Eddie gave a wave, congratulating the kid and telling him that he would see Gareth at practice.

After an eternity, Eddie saw Chrissy's blonde hair.

"Eddie!", she yelled excitedly, running forward only giving Eddie enough time to make sure he caught her.

He twirled her around. They were both laughing, and happiness could be found on both of their faces.

"Look at you," Eddie put her down, ruffling her hair since her cap had fallen off from the run, "welcome to high school, freshman!"

Chrissy grumbled, pushing Eddie's hand off her head.

"Stop! You're embarrassing me."

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry, "Eddie pulled the card and present from his back pocket, "Hopefully this would make up for it."

Chrissy took the presents from his hand, "And what is this?"

Eddie started playing with his hair, "Well the card has some money in it from Uncle Wayne and the box is something special from me."

He watched Chrissy opening the box. The girl's eyes lit up when she saw what was inside. They were a pair of earrings, something that she had talked to him about before.

"Do you like them?"

Chrissy nodded a smile on her face, "Thank you, Eddie."

That's when Eddie noticed two people that were staring at him. Eddie looked up curious how he didn't notice the two girls. Chrissy caught on to what he was looking at. She followed his gaze to the two girls standing behind her.

Chrissy's face broke out into a blush before motioning for the girls to come over.

"Um, Eddie this is Nancy Wheeler," Chrissy pointed to the girl to her left. Nancy was small but her eyes were fierce. Eddie knew not to ever mess with her.

Eddie bowed, smiling when he heard the girls laugh, "Nice to meet you, Nancy."

He held his hand out, and the girl took it. A sweet smile on her face.

Chrissy let out a breath, she didn't know that she was holding in. She gestured to the girl on her right, "And this is Robin Buckley."

Eddie had a weird feeling that he heard this name before but couldn't put a pin on where exactly he heard it from.

Robin was taller, almost as tall as Eddie. Her hair was cut short but her makeup wasn't anything like all the other girls here. It was different.

Eddie did the same spiel to Robin that he did to Nancy. After he shook Robin's hand, Chrissy introduced Eddie.

"And this is The Eddie Munson that I've told you all about," Chrissy took a moment before continuing, "He's basically my Big Brother."

If Eddie wasn't in front of a bunch of people, he would have started crying. Chrissy had always told him that she thought of him as a family but to actually hear her say it was something else.

Eddie took a deep breath, controlling his emotions before he talked.

"S-so are you all friends?" Eddie watched as the girls gave each other secretive smiles.

"You could say something like that," Robin spoke up from Chrissy's right.

Eddie watched the way Chrissy looked at him then at the girls, she wore the biggest smile on her face. He knew now why Chrissy had been so hesitant about letting him know who she was crushing on.

"There you are!"

Eddie was thrown out of his epiphany by Steve Harrington walking towards them. The boy was wearing a nice dark blue suit. It made him look handsome. His hair of course was perfect.

"Robin, your parents have been looking for you everywhere."

Steve's eyes moved around to survey the whole group before stopping at Eddie, who probably had the stupidest grin on his face.

"Eddie?"

The girls could feel a weird tension once Steve had seen Eddie. Chrissy knew the girls wouldn't be bothered about Eddie being gay but she couldn't say anything until she got permission from Eddie.

Eddie gave a sheepish grin, "Hey, Stevie."

The moment it had left Eddie's mouth, he wanted to take it back. His face burned brightly and he could feel Chrissy's teasing grin pointed his way.

Steve coughed awkwardly, his own blush creeping up his neck. It was Robin's turn to smirk annoyingly at Steve.

"So...um.... Chrissy," Steve pointed at the smaller girl in front of him, "she's the one that your best friend?"

Eddie mentally thanked Steve for the subject change. He walked forward putting a shoulder around Chrissy.

"Yep, basically my little sister, "Chrissy smiled brightly.

Steve stepped forward, chuckling. He tried putting a shoulder around Robin but she shoved him roughly. The group laughed at Steve's expense.

"Yea, I get what you mean. Sorry, Nance." He gestured to the young girl who was left out

She shrugged, "It's alright. Having a little brother is enough for me."

Steve looked around at the whole group, trying to find something to talk about, "So what are the plans for the summer?"

The girls shrugged while Eddie took his arm off of Chrissy fixing his hair, "Oh you know, a little of this, a little of that. It's my birthday in June so finally turning 16."

Steve smiled, "Oh wow, you are only turning 16! I'm going to be 16 in like November."

Eddie rolled his eyes, unknowingly walking closer to Steve, "Ha, ha, laugh it up. At least, I'm cooler than you."

Robin had enough of the stupid banter that was honestly boarding on flirting. She cleared her throat catching the attention of the boys before her. They jumped back, noticing that they have been almost face to face.

"Well, if it seems we are such close friends," Eddie noted when the two other girls giggled at Robin's use of friends, "why don't we have a pool party? Obviously at Steve's place."

Steve's eyes widen, "Why at my place?"

Robin rolled her eyes, "Cause you have a pool, and your parents are never home."

Eddie felt concerned for a second, at the mention of Steve's parents never being home.

Steve sighed, "Fine as long as it's okay with everybody?"

There was a chorus of okays from the girls. Eddie played with his hair in thought. He was playing with fire he knew it. It was dangerous what he was doing but he was curious to see where Steve lived.

"Eddie?" Steve looked at him with those big brown eyes, making Eddie melt a little.

"Welllll, I don't know," Eddie ignored the groans from the girls, "I mean, how am I supposed to know when to show up at his house," Eddie gestured to Steve, "We don't exactly have school anymore after tomorrow."

It was true tomorrow was the last day of school for the high school students. There was no way he could find out when exactly they are supposed to have this pool party.

Nancy stepped forward with a pen and paper in her hand. Steve took it.

"What am I supposed to with this?"

Nancy sighed, "Write down your number and give it to Eddie then Eddie you give him your number that way we could figure this out."

She stepped back toward Chrissy, "Are they always like this?"

Chrissy giggled, "I don't really know this is the first time I have seen them interact."

Robin piped up from her right, "Something tells me this is normal for them."

The two boys stared at each other not moving. Eddie with shaking hands decided to get this over with. He took the paper ripping it in half then scribbled his number on it, giving the pen back to Steve when he was done. Steve was able to get his body working. He scribbled down his number, then the boys interchanged the papers.

Robin clapped her hands, 'Well now that that's done. We got to go."

The girls said goodbye promising to call each other. Nancy walked away to her family. Robin pulled Steve to her family. Steve waved goodbye at Eddie who waved back.

Finally, Chrissy patted Eddie on the back.

"That was rough."

Eddie scoffed, the piece of paper burning a hole in his pocket. He gave Chrissy one last hug before turning towards the exit

"See you later, Chris. Remember our trailer is always open."

Chrissy laughed while walking into the crowd, going to find her parents.

"I'll keep that in mind."

[sohannabarberaesque]

On the porch of Mr. Peebles' second-floor apartment on a mild summer's evening:

MAGILLA GORILLA: Rather interesting of you to invite me up here this evening, Mr. Peebles, just as the day's winding down....

MR. PEEBLES, feeling somewhat delighted: Not a bad idea, especially as we could use the opportunity to share a few memories worthwhile--which, I admit, have become rather interesting, and then some!

MAGILLA GORILLA: You can say that again!

MR. PEEBLES: And to just imagine where I got that rather crazy idea of selling a gorilla through my shop window when you were just a baby ... only to encounter all sort of problems and issues whenever you got sold.

MAGILLA GORILLA: And, more often than not, with purchasers demanding a refund in their unease!

MR. PEEBLES: Plenty of them--and too many to make count of, I'm afraid to say. But I'd have to assume that you've gone through plenty of hilarious misadventures all the while!

MAGILLA GORILLA: You recall the time where this eccentric millionaire used me to try and make me a big-game trophy?

MR. PEEBLES: Like it was yesterday.

MAGILLA GORILLA: Or even the time when I entered that rodeo just to raise the $500 you needed to pay off a loan?

MR. PEEBLES: Only to lose the business rather quickly as a result....

MAGILLA GORILLA: Or even when I was loaned out to Gruesome Pictures to appear in some low-budger Tarzan-type film as the lead's ape sidekick....

MR. PEEBLES: In desperation, as it turned out. But for some reason, things didn't quite turn out.

MAGILLA GORILLA: Oh--and let's not forget all the times that a certain Ogee tried to buy me, over the protestations of her parents--

MR. PEEBLES: And the time I loaned you out to Ogee so she could have a pet to show at school for the school picnic, only to be humiliated by the school bully--

MAGILLA GORILLA: As became a blessing in disguise, it turned out. You still recall it?

MR. PEEBLES: Now that you mention it ...

MAGILLA GORILLA: Or how about that time when I was chasing a surfer down the street when his surfboard fell off his surf buggy, eventually to become the darling of the surfers of Gremmie Bulch?

MR. PEEBLES: And creating a dance sensation in the process; I remember it like it was yesterday!

MAGILLA GORILLA: Make no mistake about it; the beach crowd couldn't resist my good looks--even if I was a little klutzy on the board and the waves!

MR. PEEBLES: Ain't it the truth!

MAGILLA GORILLA: And more recently, remember my appearing in that sarsaparilla commercial, only to wind up creating such demand as forced the campaign to stop a week after it started?

MR. PEEBLES: Ohhh, I still remember it--and it was enough to nearly lose my appetite for sarsaparilla in the end! And wasn't it rather wonderful to come across The Banana Splits at that supermarket appearence?

MAGILLA GORILLA: And to arm-wrestle with Bingo therefrom, with plenty of online video of the match as well?

MR. PEEBLES: Don't remind me....

MAGILLA GORILLA: And that time where the "furry" fan tried to borrow me to show at a fur-suiters' convention, to see if they could tell that I was a gorilla--

MR. PEEBLES: Only to have the convention broken up rather quickly, as I heard it.

MAGILLA GORILLA: And hilariously.

MR. PEEBLES: Ohhhhh, Magilla, you never cease to amaze me, even if it's a pain in the butt trying to sell you all this time....

MAGILLA GORILLA: Ain't life interesting?

*************

N. B. In deference to the Memorial Day Long Weekend in the United States, Fanfic Friday will be on break next week. Look for this to return in two weeks' time, on June 2nd.

[thewhimsicalfairy]

DAY 0 - a chronological documentation of this non-relationship

right from the start, i told myself, i told everyone who would listen/knew that i was just not gonna take this too seriously...

as with all online dates, they have a tendency to drop off or i have a tendency to lose interest very quickly but somehow you stuck around, yet i still refused to entertain the idea that there might be something...

2 May: we connected on CMB, you were very open about your history which i listened with an open mind and appreciated you for being open and honest about it...

we traded numbers since the chat was closing and then continued chatting from there...

22 May: met up ftf for the first time at Oasia Hotel's Marmalade Pantry, someone was in grey tee (knitted i believe) and camou pants haha the convo flowed and all but still it was just like any other first dates i've been on, always keeping my expectations in check... you surprised me with sandwich choices though, promising to bring me a jar of the infamous peanut butter from Amsterdam (from your upcoming work trip) and proceeding to hand me a box of 2 nicely wrapped sandwiches, one creamy and one non-creamy version, both with the crusts off. it showed me you were meticulous and caring...just noting your good qualities... before we parted ways you asked if we could be in touch...i said sure being the cool girl that i am...

1 June: we continued texting non-stop, rapid-fire style, playing 20 questions...asking all the right and wrong questions...we’d already escalated to sexting by then...and then you left for Amsterdam. truth be told i had this crazy urge to run to your office area to bid you farewell prior to you leaving for your trip...like give you a hug or something...but i reined in that crazy bitch. we continued texting all the way till you boarded your plane and then you asked me to send you my picture. i've received such crazy requests before and i was kinda wary but i took some anyhow (ok more like a lot) and then proceeded to ponder whether to send or not for the next 50min or so...as well as ask the Internet gods 'what does it mean when he asks for a photo' (to varying degrees of responses) you even noticed my absence when i was busy taking photos but i sent 1 in the end after i confirmed that u were not gonna be doing anything funny to it (not sure if i’m supposed to be flattered if anyone wanks off to my photo but anyway)

and then you sent me yours just like that (and it is still my favourite photo of you to date haha)...and promised to text the moment you land and all...you were very responsible with your words then...

1-7 June: you were in Amsterdam for work but it was as if i was just right beside you on this same trip cos the texting never let up despite the time difference. you would send me pictures of everything that you were doing, eating, ootds, everything and there was no stopping the conversations... and still you reeled me in...

13 June: we met up for a 2nd time, this time at Pagi Sore (100am) and depsite constant texting, it felt a little awks nonetheless to be meeting ftf after so long so everyone was still kinda on our best behaviour haha (but i'm always well behaved) and you presented me with the gifts you got for me at Amsterdam (the peanut butter as promised) and fancy chocolates that you picked up at the airport. confirmed mentally that gift giving was defo one of your top love language. and still you reeled me in...

and we texted some more, non-stop, impromptu lunches in between and i'd happily skip out of office just to hang out ditching the girls (resulting in the girls just saying how about i let them know when i would be next joining them for lunch =x)

20 June: dinner and drinks at Westin's Cook & Brew...this was kinda like the night you will provide a tell-all on your past relationships - and tell you did (a terribly colourful dating history if i may add) and the night went on... we continued on with more drinks at the outdoor bar area...normally it would've been a good idea but that night it was terribly windy and i was kinda chilly despite the alcohol warming me up so i was glad to have my jacket with me (the same one i wore to our first date you noted). and then it started to rain and we had to move back indoors but we didn't attempt to leave even though i was already feeling buzzed... not before long the bar had to close so i had to down my wine in a quick shot and we left...and took a roundabout walk to around the area on a bench and talked some more we both agreed the night would have carried on if not for the fact that tomorrow was still a working day... the question of what we were looking for came up (i asked this question first) and you said you were just looking around... we got home on separate taxis and i made a mental note of your response and that you hadn't made a move on me yet so i was relatively clear on where i stood on this (meh's advice, especially after watching 'He's Just Not That Into You') - you were basically not interested hah so i managed my expectations and thought well a least it has been interesting...when we got home...you did text to say you did notice my choice of outfit (my all time favourite slip dress really)...pity you didn’t manage to take a good look at the cowl back...

29 June: you finally asked me out on a weekend...actually i did casually mention to you that my mom was wondering why this guy i was seeing never asks me out on weekends...and if he’s got a family and all that’s why weekends are off-limits...(a mother’s intuition can be so spot-on but clearly it’s way more complicated than that...anyhow...) and i was ecstatic to say the least even if it was a date that was made that same day...tbh i was inclined to decline cos i don’t really do impromptu dates in general...(like please respect a girl’s time even if i don’t actually have solid plans...vegging at home and netflixing is kinda like a plan ok...)but i okayed it and just had to check what was the general plan cos a girl’s gotta dress for it you know...you brought me to the Ford Musuem having known that i am a sucker for museums covering the history of the war...even though you actually only went recently but you still accompanied me through it...it was also then you realised that i don’t carry my IC with me cos entry was free for SGreans...truth be told i have been to the Ford Musuem...but that was a few years back and i didn’t quite mind rehashing the place again (FOC why not right) they might have updated the exhibits and the experience would have been different with you...and rightly so cos there was so many times when you had your back towards me i wanted to give you a back hug...that you liked receiving them came up several times while we texting...but i never acted on it haha cos i didn’t want to seem i was throwing myself at you...a girl’s gotta to keep her pride in check you know...

after Ford you drove us to Punggol area just to show me the nice relaxing eating space...but we didn’t actually have dinner there lol...we moved on to Punggol Settlement to dine at White Restaurant...the only place you will eat bee hoon cos that placed is famous for it and with good reason cos the food is genuinely good...we had quite the spread, other than the bee hoon we had prawn paste chicken and sambal kang kong :))) happy camper that night cos i appreciate a good meal...i paid for dinner since you were so sweet to drive us around that was least i could do...back in the car you asked if i needed to head home...but i was up for anything...so you suggested a drive and asked if i had been to Jewel since it opened and i hadn’t so we ended up there...

and we continued texting...

1 July: we met for lunch at the Nasi Lemak place opposite Realty Centre (which has since died) and post-lunch i was saying how i was concerned that my hair would smell and all (cos indoor seating with the food cooking inside doesn't make for a great combination) and you reached out and smelt my hair...that was the single most intimate move that i'd ever received and then before we parted you pulled me into a hug and i just went for it... like i didn't do the a-hug or half hug kind of bullshit but a full on body to body contact hug...and it felt nice...i think my mind kinda stopped processing whilst we were hugging but yeah i really really liked the smell of your cologne since then another fact: i was so turned on from that hug my panties were basically soaked; i had to wear my dress the wrong way round so that it wouldn't look like i stained myself... you had that kind of an effect on me...and i think my walls came tumbling down...

4 July: dinner at a Suntec's Unagi place (your choice since we didn't want to deal with the queue at Man Man) and apparently you took off early that night to pick up your car... someone wanted to drive us to some place nice after... i saw that there was 1-for-1 happy hour on the highball and you okayed it even though you were driving

you drove us Marina Barrage and there you said that you liked me and wrapped me in your arms when you said it and i was in a complete daze i mean i was aware that there was something brewing but i wasn't sure of the signs and i've been very wary about 自作多情 so i just maintained whatever it was we had and then this confession...you said i clearly liked you otherwise i wouldn't be hanging out with you which was true and then you asked what was it that i liked about you as you wrapped me in your arms again and i was genuinely at a loss for words...i've received confessions before but never one where it was clearly mutual and in such an intimate setting...the wordsmith basically decided to quit on me and i struggled to find the right words i settled for ‘you make me feel safe’ and that was the absolute truth...i never doubted your intentions before as you were always so honest and forthcoming with the situation back at home and even when you said you couldn’t make this official not until your divorce is finalised in Dec...when in reality not many people around you know about us i accepted it...i trusted you completely... and you took your hand in mine and it was the interlocking kind...and my heart felt all kinds of things it has never felt before... another fact: again super turned on by the hug we shared, panties were soaking wet again but thank god for panty liners otherwise it'll be a different walk of shame for me... i really liked it when you placed your hand on my bum (it felt good somehow), and i definitely felt a boner somewhere...

5 July: dinner and movie (...) i was kinda sad when the night ended, i didn't want it to end cos i always enjoyed our time together, there wasn't enough time anyhow and i gave you a peck on the cheek cos that was all i could muster at that point before we parted...

(...to be continued...)

basically once the touch barrier was broken, i wanted to touch you so badly all the time. literally ALL.THE.TIME. even if it was just stolen moments at Donki i gave you backhugs and random kisses and hand holding...i couldn't get enough... i confirmed one of my top love languages was touch and i wanted to communicate that thoroughly...you meant that much to me...

x x x

and as much as you are wont to admit it, i was defo a rebound, all the signs pointed to it and and it still tears me up inside i basically became collateral damage as you tried to seek solace from the pain... the Heartbreak Spotify Playlist is definitely not helping my case but it’s like beating a dead horse right...you just keep going at it until you’re numb i suppose...but i had no idea how i could relate so much to these songs till now it’s pretty crazy...some favourite tracks that can set me off right now are: Camila Cabelo’s Consequences X Ambassadors’ Unsteady Birdy’s Skinny Love