#insists she’d do differently now. of course she would she isn’t a broke 22 year old!!!

[thewingedwolf]

one thing about hbo is that when they get a journalist coming up to them and going “man do i have a fucked up story i want to follow” they really do let that person go wild. i’ve mentioned the way the ronan farrow one really moved me emotionally and that’s just because ronan knows how to investigate and tell a story to get you righteously angry for who it is he’s defending. he’s good at his job!

but this one, quiet on the set, has genuinely made my jaw drop a few times, even if i think some of the framing could have been better in the last episode. of course i know about all the rumors about dan schneider and the abuse on set, it’s hard to have been into the teen nick scene and not notice, and it’s pretty easy to figure out which kids were being harmed through too much attention and which were being harmed through not enough attention, and there’s been all sorts of rumors floating around for over a decade!

but the build up to the drake bell reveal was well handled, i thought. i was initially skeptical because i think it’s hard to make a documentary about child sexual abuse without leaning into being exploitative in some way. and at first, where you have the actors who left early, like katrina, or who you remember but weren’t mega famous like giovannie, and they’re all saying “this set was so weird & inappropriate, i knew something was wrong but i didn’t have the experience or vocabulary to say what” it feels a little too schlocky. like, oh we’re just kind of speculating on the inappropriate nature of dan’s “friendship” with amanda bynes for two episodes? yeah it is fucked up that two pedophiles were on that set, but did they hurt anyone on set?

and then drake bell walks into the room dressed like timmy turner and says it was me. he hurt me.

i can’t stop thinking about the choice of clothes here and the way it helps drive home the point of the doc. he’s sitting there in fairly odd parents colors as an adult and can’t describe the sexual trauma he experienced as a child still, has never spoken about it, had his mom lie to his father over it because he was so screwed up. really driving home the point that he was just a kid who had a knack for physical comedy and it got him preyed on by dan, a man who should have protected him, set up and handed over to a monster who traumatized him for months and years.

but when that reporter said she got a judge to let them unseal the court documents because drake bell told her how much support peck had? my jaw dropped, like yeah this is reporting, this is someone who saw this story and finally fucking cared not about the salacious details but about who knew what and why they did nothing to stop this from happening. it’s not about forcing drake bell or katrina jackson or alexa to live through the worst moments of their life - it’s about how so many people knew what was going on and didn’t do a god damn thing to stop it. it’s about how these monsters, these convicted pedophiles, were given access to little kids to hurt and traumatize and everyone knew and didn’t just look the other way, they actively helped cover it up. THATS the story. Not that it was an isolated tragedy but that it was a clinical, purposeful environment built by people who wanted to harm little kids.

[bigfan-fanfic]

Kost Aban as a Companion

(Face Claim: Brant Daugherty) Kost Aban, Road Dad of the Inner Circle and Magesmith for the Inquisition. He’s charming and sweet, and he’ll handle requisitions so you never have to worry about that Requisition Officer ever again. Also he makes travel snacks as well as serves as a portable weapon and armor crafting station. Did I mention he’s romanceable?

Companion Name: Kost Aban (lit. “Peaceful Ocean” in Qunlat) Race, Class, and Specialization: Qunari Mage (Rift Mage) Varric’s Nickname for Him: Shiny (for his horn ornaments) Default Tarot Card: Page of Wands

How He Is Recruited: His adopted human son, Roland, a young man of about 22, will rush out into the plaza in Val Royeaux on the first visit and request the Inquisitor come meet his father. Kost will immediately offer his services as a magesmith to the Inquisition, as well as his son’s skills as an apprentice. If the Inquisitor is a Qunari, he will also mention that sometimes it helps to have a friendly face around that one doesn’t have to look down to see. Where He Is In Skyhold: With his son, Dagna (and conditionally) Harritt in the Undercroft. He can generally be found talking smithing techniques or occasionally insisting Roland and Dagna go get refreshments and sunlight because they’ve been working too long. If he is recruited, he will also set up a cozy-looking sitting area/lounge in the Undercroft. Things He Generally Approves of: Upgrading Skyhold, completing Dagna’s sidequests, not siding with the Qunari, showing mercy Things He Generally Disapproves of: Siding with the Qunari, executing prisoners, siding with the Templars Mages, Templars, Other? As a mage himself and a former Saarebas, Kost definitely approves of siding with the mages and giving them freedom.

Romanceable? Yes, by any gender or race.  Friends in the Inquisition: Blackwall, Sera, and Cole. He befriends Sera through Dagna, Blackwall because of their shared enjoyment of crafting, and Cole because Kost can’t help but adopt the kid. He becomes friends with Iron Bull if the Chargers are saved. Small Side mission: Collect 10 dawnstone and 10 bloodstone. Kost will Greatly Approve and unlock schematics for Magewrought Weapons

Companion Quest: Kost is happy to have his son working with him but wonders whether Roland might prefer a different career or perhaps to attend the University of Orlais. He once caught Roland studying magic books and worries that he’s pressuring him into apprenticeship. He asks the Inquisitor to speak to Roland instead. When confronted, Roland admits that he’s been studying magic books so that he can tinker and improve his prosthetic arm, but he didn’t want to offend his dad, who spent years working on the magical formulae. He asks the Inquisitor not to tell.

Option 1: Tell Kost - This will net Great Approval from Kost and Cole, and Kost will talk to Roland and say that he couldn’t be offended that Roland is so interested and asks for them to proceed together with the tinkering. Father and son embrace and thank the Inquisitor

Option 2: Cover for Roland - The Inquisitor has the choice of telling Kost that Roland was merely curious about the process of magic or lie and say the magic books were hiding naughty material. Either way Kost will agree to let the matter drop.

Cole’s Reflection on His Thoughts: “The mask is gone and the bonds broken, burnt away and banished. My voice shall never more lie lost and leashed, locked away behind bars of word and deed.” Comments on Mages: “I know what it is like to be born different, and I once knew nothing more than imprisonment and shame for what I was. I have nothing but sadness to know that even here, others share my fate.” Comments on Templars: “If your protector is also your jailer, I think you have somewhat of a conflict of interest.” When looking for something: “Listen... there is something...” When finding a campsite: “Allow me to whip up a little something from these field rations.” When he is low on health: “I will not make my son an orphan again!” When he sees a dragon: “Not that I’m saying we should fight it, but... I could make some seriously good stuff out of dragon bone and hide.” Default saying: “Do you think Roland’s doing alright?”

Travel Banter:

Vivienne: So, Ser Aban. I have heard much of your magesmithing techniques. The Formari believe you are usurping their dominance over the market. Kost: I’m afraid, Madam, the Formari are mistaken. I happen to make useful items, not decoration. Vivienne (amused): Indeed? Then you must prize function over form in your pieces. Kost: Of course. I want to keep people alive, even at the cost of fashion. Vivienne: Some costs are worth dying for, darling.

Kost: I didn’t get the chance to thank you, Blackwall. Blackwall: What for? Kost: The extra firewood. My forge requires more than a normal smithy to stay working, and you provided. Blackwall: Wasn’t for you specially. I... I like chopping wood. Kost: And teaching my son how to swing an axe played no role? Blackwall: Oh. Kost: Too many people treat him as though he’s useless. I saw how happy he was with you. So as I said. Thank you... for the firewood. Blackwall: ...you’re welcome. Kost: There’s a magewrought sword with your name on it when we return to Skyhold.

(If Cole was made more human) Kost: You don’t have to handle everything, you know. You changed, right down to the core. Cole: I am fine. Kost: Sure, sure. Just as long as you know you don’t have to be. We’ve got you, Cole. Starting with rest. I got you a spare blanket - I’ve seen you shivering in your sleep. Cole: But I don’t- Kost: I’ve seen what you do for people. You’re not invisible anymore, you know. So it’s time you let someone else help you. Do you mind it if it’s me? Cole: I... th-thank you.

Iron Bull: You don’t like me much, do you? Kost (sarcastically): I didn’t know you were going for universal popularity. Iron Bull: Ha. You talk like one of these Orlesian bigwigs. Too important to waste time on mercs? (If the Inquisitor is a Qunari) And what about being “a friendly face,” huh? Kost: You won’t get a reaction out of me, Ben-Hassrath. Iron Bull: Even a lack of reaction is a reaction. Kost: Fuck you. How’s that for a reaction?

Friendship: “Ah! Come here for a shield or a cup of tea and some chat? Either way, I’m at your service.”

The Fade

How he reacts: “Oh, I’m not enjoying this at all.” Their Tombstone: Bereavement What the Fears look like: Himself in the mask and chains of a Saarebas What the Nightmare says: “The so-called peaceful ocean. I’ve been watching you for years now. The eyes of the Qun are everywhere and now, there’s nothing you can do to deflect their gaze.” Their reflection about the Fade: “Never again. Never.” Hawke or Warden: Depends on Hawke’s actions. If Hawke sided with the Chantry in DA2, Kost will suggest that they are responsible for the Qunari improving their foothold and force and believe they should atone in the Fade. If not, Kost suggests the Qun’s respect for Hawke is one of the only things keeping the Qunari from invading and believes they should escape the Fade.

The Wardens

Their feelings: Believes the Wardens make hard choices to save the world from the Blight. Exile or Allies?: Allies

The Ball

How they feel: “It isn’t my first ball, but I’m surprised at how many people I know, here. Babette de Launcet just tried to poach me from the Inquisition!” Where they linger: The garden balcony, near the bard singing in Orlesian Are they good at the Game?: He’s not great at being fake, but he is good at schmoozing, especially since his smithing skills are an avid topic of discussion. What people say about them: “Did you see the Magesmith walking by? So tall and dashing...””You do realize he is a Qunari, don’t you?” “My dear, that’s all part of the appeal. Imagine those burly muscles sweating at a forge...” Gaspard, Briala, or Celene?: Briala, or Celene with Briala - he fears Gaspard in power most of all, and he’d hate if war broke out between Orlais and Ferelden with the Qunari lurking at the borders.

Temple of Mythal

Rituals or Hole?: Rituals Agree with the Elves’ bargain?: Agree. Morrigan or Inquisitor for the Well?: The Inquisitor

Comments on Canon Romance

Cassandra: “The Seeker? A worthy choice. Though... I can’t help but wonder whether she’d choose love over duty should the time come.” Dorian: “Dorian? That must be fun - I hope he doesn’t criticize the patterns of your britches!” Sera: “Roland likes Sera - I think you two will get up to all sorts of mischief together.” Iron Bull: “Bull? Well... you do remember he was a Qunari spy, right? Never mind, I’m sure you know what you’re doing.” Josephine: “Don’t you hurt her, Inquisitor. She’s a wonderful person and a light in this world.” Cullen: “You know, I can craft certain soft lamps for the night. I’ve seen the look of a man who doesn’t sleep much on his face. Perhaps it will help.” Blackwall: “Tell me, I’m curious. Is the beard scratchy?” Solas: “D’you know, he hates tea? Suspicious, if you ask me.”

Sexual/Racial preference:  Any race or gender. Nickname for PC: Little One Romance only mission: (Can only be completed after Kost’s love confession) A cutscene featuring Kost and the Inquisitor in bed plays, involving a pillow talk discussion where Kost says “I love you.” The Inquisitor can choose to say it back or not, and ask about his past. The conversation finishes with Kost suggesting marriage would be more than acceptable to him, although he wouldn’t pressure the Inquisitor into it. The quest involves speaking to Kost’s son Roland to get his blessing to propose to Kost. The Inquisitor must perform a War Table mission to get Roland some parts to aid in the proposal, which will affect the next cutscene. If Cullen is chosen, Roland will be given some explosives and dyes and he will shoot fireworks during the proposal. If Leliana is selected, smoke pellets will be given and Roland will make a clockwork smoke machine to give a mystical air to the proposal. If Josephine is chosen, Roland will meet with some bards and make a music box to play while the Inquisitor proposes. The Inquisitor will then meet with Kost in the Skyhold garden at night and propose, choosing dialogue options that are sweet, nervous, or humorous, all resulting in Kost accepting the proposal and promising to marry the Inquisitor and love them forever - once Corypheus has been dealt with.

Dialog to being asked for a kiss: “Did you come down here just for this? How romantic... I must make it worth your while, little one.”

Halamshiral dialog: “Of all the magnificence in this palace... I can say without exaggeration that nothing compares to you.”

Being asked to dance during mission: “Josephine would kill me if I kept you from some diplomat or duke. But I shall gladly sacrifice myself once you have made your rounds.”

Asking to dance post-mission: “I- I warn you, little one, I’m not very good. But I’d do anything for you.”

What Cole says about companion to PC: “There was always darkness behind the mask, both of the masks he’s worn. But now it is safe and soft. Now there is you.”

Who is concerned about the relationship?: Vivienne. Josephine (for political reasons)

Who supports the relationship?: Blackwall, Dorian, Cullen

Who had a bet running on it?: Cassandra, Sera

Banter(between NPCs):

Vivienne: (after the romance only mission) I understand I am to offer you and the Inquisitor congratulations? Kost: We are engaged, yes. Vivienne: I do hope you understand what you are doing. Kost: I understand that I am in love. I understand that I am loved in return. And I understand that political considerations do not matter to me when I am with the Inquisitor. Does that satisfy you, Madam? Vivienne: Satisfy? No. Please me? Quite. I wish you every happiness.

Blackwall: You’ve... been around a while, haven’t you? Kost: Er... yeah? Blackwall: And the Inquisitor doesn’t mind? Not that it’s a problem, not that I think it’s a problem or anything, just- Kost: Ser Blackwall, do you have your eye on someone younger than you? Blackwall: What? I- where would you think tha- no. Kost (teasing): Fascinating. You blush right through your beard! Blackwall (groaning playfully): Oh, piss off!

Sera: You and the big man, eh? Hehe, because- Kost: Sera. You’re not subtle. Vivienne (if present): My dear, your lack of tact is simply appalling. Sera: Rolly likes you too, yeah? You better not hurt his dad or you know what? Kost: It’s arrows, isn’t it? Sera: Arrows!

Flirt options: Upon reaching Skyhold and unlocking the Undercroft, Kost will be ecstatic at the sight of the new smithing area and the Inquisitor can say he looks adorable when excited. This opens up a dialogue option later to begin romancing him.

If PC breaks it off: “Ah. I- uh. Of course. I hope I haven’t done anything to offend you. I shall continue to help the Inquisition as best I can.”

Love confession: Kost will ask to take a walk with the Inquisitor and they will end up on the battlements. Kost will talk about his life as a smith and as a father and say that he never seemed to end up with anyone to love and romance... until the Inquisitor. He says he hopes he didn’t read the situation wrong, but that he has fallen hopelessly for them.

Romanced tarot card: King of Pentacles

End game dialog: “Isn’t that something? No matter how hard I tried, I could never forge something as beautiful as a sunrise. I could never capture that kind of beauty. And yet... it is nothing compared to your face. The sun rises and sets each day without fail, but I promise to be even more constant for you - I am with you.”

[drreporting]

Echo Pt.22

“Amelia, why don’t you want to be with me?”

“Wow,” she muttered as she resumed shrugging off her jacket and hanging it up on the rack, “That’s a loaded question.”

“Is it because we’re divorced?” he questioned as she passed him, heading to the kitchen.

Amelia mulled over the question, deciding she’d at least answer that. “Well, yes, but no.” She rested her handbag on the countertop, talking to him in this nonchalant tone that only served to irritate him even more.

“Well then, what is it?” he asked, following her to the kitchen, “Because I don’t want to date random women.” When she didn’t respond, he added, “I don’t like seeing you with someone else. It makes me feel weird.” Amelia felt a pang of guilt.

“I only went out with him because you made me,” she reminded him, going into the fridge for the mug of water they kept.

“Because you made me go out with that random woman, who didn’t even know who you were until I told her!” he exclaimed.

“Do you even know her name?” he challenged him, going for a glass from the cabinet.

Owen angrily walked around the kitchen island to close the cabinet that the Shepherd had left open. “Her name is Amidala.” They always seemed to find themselves in the kitchen during an argument, almost as if it was impossible for them to argue anywhere else. Amelia didn’t mind, though. She needed a distraction from his incessant interrogation and the nasty words that were begging to be let out of her mouth. Pouring water wasn’t very distracting, but she’d take anything right now.

“That’s a nice name,” she mused.

Owen furrowed his eyebrows in frustration. “I don’t care because I don’t like her,” he stressed, “I like you.” He made it around the kitchen island and to her side, invading her personal space on purpose. “What do I have to do to get you to like me back?”

God, he was saying all the right things to her. She was slowly feeling herself crumbling to his will and his close proximity didn’t help. “Nothing, because we are not a thing and we aren’t going to be.”

“Why?” he whined a little. Her lack of reasoning was frustrating him to the point where he felt like he was being treated as a child who was too young for the truth. “Is it because it didn’t work before? Because I hurt you?”

Amelia sighed, feeling a little guilty. “No, Owen.” After all, even though she knew exactly what was wrong and why, he had no clue what was going on.

“Please tell me what it is so I can fix it,” he pleaded with her, resting a hand on her waist, “I want to make things right.” The way he stared at her with longing, hand on her waist and his incredible insistence although his lack of knowledge for the situation had caused something in Amelia to snap.

“You can’t fix it, Owen!” she accidentally yelled at him, losing her temper. Taking a deep breath, and in a much calmer tone, she added, “It’s already beyond repair.”

He looked at her, anger beginning to boil within him. If it wasn’t the divorce, and it wasn’t the hurt that was stopping Amelia from loving him once more, what was it? Then, it suddenly hit him.

“Is it…is it Megan?” he uttered in a small, child-like voice. The look of fear that suddenly took over her face told him everything he needed to know. “It’s her, isn’t it?”

“I’m tired, Owen,” she lied, gripping tightly onto the glass of water she had on the kitchen island, “Can we do this later?”

“No, stop deflecting me,” he demanded, “You haven’t even had a sip of your water yet and now you’re sleepy?” When she didn’t respond, he continued to pester her, “What is it about Megan?”

She closed her eyes and sighed, feeling tears sting the back of them. “Owen…”

“No, tell me Amelia,” he cut her off, not wanting to get any more lies or deflections, “We need to fix this.”

Instantly, her eyes opened, a blaze of fury in them now. “I don’t need to fix anything because I didn’t do anything wrong,” she spat at him. How dare he try to include her in the blame of why their marriage ended so quickly?

“Really?” he sought to confirm, “Nothing at all?” Amelia remained silent, standing behind her words. “So you don’t think you were a little wrong in divorcing me after only five months of struggling?” he queried, “Or is it a normal thing for you to throw stuff away when it breaks? I can’t remember, so please jog my memory.” Her expression softened from his words; clearly he’d hit a nerve. “The least you could do is telling me what I need to fix.”

His proclaimed entitlement got her right back to anger once more. “You can’t fix it, Owen. You tried and it didn’t work!”

“What didn’t work?” he asked, “What aren’t you telling me?”

“You tried to fix Megan!” she yelled, the words finally setting themselves free from her mouth. Amelia sighed to herself, knowing she’d opened a can of worms now, whereas Owen looked more confused than before, if that was possible. “You tried to fix her, and it broke you. Every time you went there, you broke a little more until all that was left of you was trauma and hatred and guilt and grief and -,” she took a shaky breath as the tears finally fell – “that is not going to change.”

Her tears made his heart ache more than he’d anticipated they would. “You don’t know that,” he told her, determined to get her to believe in second, third, maybe even tenth chances.

“But I do, Owen,” she arrogantly responded, “It happened for months! Nothing ever changed; it only got worse!”

“Things can change,” he insisted, “You have to believe that.”

“Why?” she asked, quirking an eyebrow at him, “What reason would I have to believe that?” She was right. “Owen, you don’t know what they did to her over there.”

“I don’t care,” he dismissed, “Everything can be fixed.”

“Really, everything?” she scoffed, finally taking a sip of her water, “So you’re going to somehow undo the violence, rape and mental abuse that your sister went through for over ten years?”

His face fell, the revelation making him hurt even more. “That’s what they did to her?”

“She tried to kill herself, Owen,” she said so quietly that he nearly didn’t hear it, “More than once.” Tears drew themselves to his eyes as he tried to imagine the trauma that his sister had gone through. “Now look me in the eye and tell me you can fix that.” He looked at her, but the second their eyes met, he looked away.

“She is my sister, Amelia,” he reaffirmed, “I have to try.” He was going to try no matter what, even if it meant losing himself in the process. It was the least he could do after abandoning her in that desert all those years ago. He should’ve never told her to get on that helicopter. He should’ve never left the army without her. He should’ve never…

“Where are you going?” Amelia inquired when Owen had suddenly left the kitchen without a word. “Owen?”

“Where is Megan?” he asked, walking up the stairs and right down the hall to their bedroom.

“in a facility in DC,” she answered, stopping at the door of their bedroom as she watched him fetch his travel bag. A chill ran down her spine as she realised what he was about to do. “You’re not going there.”

“And why not?” he asked, already grabbing piles of clothing to fit into the suitcase.

“What do you think is going to happen when you get there?” she inquired, entering the room and following him around as he looked for different pieces of clothing, “Everything suddenly works and you fix her?”

“I have to try,” he repeated again, more to himself than to her. “What’s the name of the facility?”

She froze in her spot, watching as he continued to pack. “Wait, you’re going now?”

He sighed and stood up, shirts in one hand and boxers in the other. “I’m not waiting.”

“Don’t go to DC,” she said. A feeling of dread and fear was creeping up her back and spreading all over her body.

“Why not?” he scoffed, not realising how paralysed she’d suddenly become, “What is keeping me here, you, your promise that this is never going to work?” He shook his head and stuffed the items into his case. “I have to know for myself.”

“Owen, you are making a mistake,” she said slowly, tears brimming again.

“No, you’re making a mistake, Amelia,” he snapped, making her jump slightly, “We have this second chance to make things better, for Megan, for us, and you refuse to take it. It’s like you hit your head!”

“I’m not taking it because I know how this ends, Owen,” she said, her voice trembling, “In tears and empty promises and, possibly premature, divorces. I’m not going through that again.”

He furrowed his eyebrows at her, a mixture of confusion and frustration coursing through him. He walked to where she was and stared at her like she was an alien. In a soft, slow tone, he said, “Amelia, I literally bashed my head against the ceiling of an airplane!” He watched as her tears finally fell, but pushed through with the rest of what he needed to say. “I forgot everything good that happened to me and everything bad too. Can’t you see that this is a chance for us to fix this?”

“You mean risk breaking everything all over again?” she interpreted.

“What is there to break this time?” he bitterly announced, “I already lost everything.” He ran a hand through his hair, ending at the back of his neck. “I lost Megan; I lost you, our marriage, my family, everything.”

“Don’t go to DC,” she begged one last time.

“Amelia, you can’t even be with me because of this,” he explained, “I have to go.” And, with that, he was back to packing while Amelia watched, helpless.

“You’re making a mistake,” she told him after a few minutes.

Owen sighed, dropping his clothes into the bag before turning to face her. “There is a reason for all this.” When she didn’t respond, he reaffirmed his statement. “There is, Amelia.” He walked to the bathroom and scooped all his things into one hand, all the while saying, “There is a reason we got on that plane. There is a reason it crashed.” He threw the items into the bag and then pointed to his head as he said, “There is a reason I hit my head.”

“How can you believe that?” Amelia asked in a small, child-like voice. Owen frowned and looked over at where she was standing, by the door, the sound of her broken voice drawing him closer to comfort her.

“I just believe it,” he answered, taking her hands in his, “There is a reason why I’m still alive, why you managed to save me.” It didn’t matter to her what he said, no matter how positive it sounded. She knew that if he went back to DC, especially now, then she would lose him. So she did the only thing she could think of to keep him there; she kissed him. A low blow, but she was more afraid of what would be revealed to him in DC than how he would look at her if he knew she was trying to manipulate him with affection. But, just as she thought things were going to go a certain way, Owen pulled away from her, and there it was. The look of hurt, disappointment; he’d read right through her move.

“Tell me where Megan is,” he begged one more time.

She mulled over his words and, knowing she had no other choice at this point, came to her final decision. “She’s in the Recovery Village in Maryland.”