#initially read ''pick your finger'' and this tag did not clue me in the mistake let me tell you

[thekrazykeke]

title: just keep breathing

fandom(s): fallen hero rebirth/retribution

pairing(s): wei chen x sidestep. ricardo ortega x sidestep. wei chen x ricardo ortega x sidestep. ricardo ortega x wei chen. 

playlist/song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AMkz9JF7teY

rating: t+

summary: maybe it’s not about fixing what’s broken. maybe it’s about starting over and creating something better.

warning(s): pre poly relationship, comfort food, pining, mild spoilers for the alpha build, angst and hurt/comfort.

Listen. 

I played Fallen Hero Rebirth and rated it a solid 9, and the story initially left me crying my eyeballs out but mildly confused, wanting to understand things. So I replayed and replayed and replayed. I picked up things and the clues started fitting together. I paid for the Retribution alpha build and I’m still crying my eyeballs out at night over it but I wanted resolution. I wanted to give (one of) my character(s) a light at the end of the tunnel. 

So this is what it is. Or an attempt at it because FHR is really quite dark and not for the faint hearted. Those warning tags are not for show. 

Sidestep’s name is Tyndall Bowman in this one.

~

It happens on a Sunday. The last weekend before a new month started, technically.

Ortega frequently visits Chen’s apartment and brings food, lightly ribbing the other man for his lackluster kitchen space. Chen’s routine response becoming less and less exasperated each time. 

You think that he not so secretly fears that you’ll both starve or subsist off canned food and cheap takeout. ...Which probably isn’t a far off assumption, considering the implication day one of your temporary living situation.

It could be considered sweet, if it wasn’t so very funny. (You had to get your kicks somewhere).

Your legs are still broken. 

Progress is frustratingly slow. 

You’d tried to move to a schedule of crutches-only by the second week out of sheer boredom and the flat look Chen had leveled in your direction caused you to nix that idea stat. 

There’s a tension between Chen and you now. 

Not to say that there rarely isn’t tension, but that’s usually due to an aftermath of an argument. Now? Now, you’re aware of him. Aware of him in a way that you’d only been aware of Ortega.

Fucking hell.

Someone’s knee brushes lightly against yours, breaking you out of your reverie. You glance to the left and catch sight of Ricardo watching you with soft, worried eyes. Chen also watching, but less obvious in his concern, features more stoic, controlled. The three of you are in the living room, they are siting on the couch, you’re in your wheelchair. 

They probably asked you something and you were zoned out.

The lie is on the tip of your tongue, “I’m fine,” you mumble and grip your bowl which has half melted blueberry swirl ice cream and salted caramel cheesecake. Sweets are your kryptonite but Ricardo has pulled out your top favorites...

“You’re fine?” Ricardo scoffs, his tone skeptic. 

A muscle jumped in your jaw. “Yep, just fine,” you reply, using your spoon to scoop up some ice cream, take a bite and enjoy the flavor. Refusing to give an inch and let him win. 

The two of you had played this game many times, too many actually, and it usually ends with you being the one to fall for the prodding, and then you get angry, lash out. 

Walk away.  Only this time you can’t. 

Another scoff. “Typical. You do this every time, you know.” There’s a surprising amount of bitterness in Ricardo’s voice now. 

“Ricardo,” Chen starts to interject, the strain clear in his voice. “Tyndall. Stop.”

It’s too late though. 

Placing down the bowl on the nearest surface, freeing up your hands, you clench then unclench your fingers, trying to avoid cracking your knuckles. “And what about you, then huh, Saint Ortega?” The sneer on your face is ugly. “You’re always on about me being honest with my feelings and talking, but the truth of it is, you’re just like me, or worse!”

Ortega looks dumbfounded. As if he can’t believe you’d dare to throw the truth in his face like this, so obviously. He recovers quicker than you’d like, much to your annoyance, though. “...Maybe so,” he acknowledges, his voice softer. Enough to lull a more gullible individual into complacency or just anyone not paying attention. You know better. “That’s a topic we can revisit in a moment. I’m more curious about how long the two of you expect me to play the idiot here.”

Unwillingly, your eyes dart to Chen’s, then away. 

Not focusing on any particular point in the room. Does Ortega know that you’re Mastermind? Since when, and did Chen tell him? Or is he bluffing right now and he doesn’t know? Is he talking about something totally different than what you’re thinking about?

Quick! Think up an appropriate answer and throw him off the trail!

“....I don’t....know what you mean.”

That’s not what you should say!!

Chen sighs deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose.  He looks pretty much done with the both of you right now, not that you can blame him. “Be clearer, the two of you have a propensity for telling half truths which leads to the majority of these absurd arguments.” 

Ricardo winced and you feel the sting from that particular burn as well. 

“In response to your statement, though, no one is expecting you to play the fool.” He looks a little nervous, guilty. “ I... We’ve kissed.” There’s a pinch to his brow, the tips of his ears turning pink. “That wasn’t an example of being a good friend to you, kissing Tyndall and murkying the waters further when I knew the two of you were...” There’s a pause as he tries to find a word for what you and Ortega shared before you and he tentatively stopped antagonizing each other and bonded over Spoon. 

You snorted, lips twisting into a wry smile, “The phrasing of that sentence makes it sound as if I found it a chore to kiss you or something.” Chen cuts you an admonishing look which you temporarily ignore as you turn to glance at Ortega who’d been watching the byplay between you and Chen with an unreadable expression. For the nth time, you wish you could read his mind, and at the same time, you’re grateful that you can’t. 

“...He’s right though. It was an epically shitty thing to do, kissing your oldest friend, who’s probably had a crush on you since he’s met you, while we were kissing. Totally and unnecessarily complicated.”

He just looked at the two of you for a moment. Then Ricardo sighed heavily, running a hand over his face, wearily. “Esto es un desastre.”

You say nothing, staying quiet because honestly, you agree. This is a mess, and it was poorly handled, on all sides. You’d already spilled the beans about Chen having a crush Ortega before it got to this point because you sincerely thought the conversation should have come up properly over seven years ago, your ‘death’ should have been a nonfactor. 

They likely would’ve been a couple already if they weren’t such obtuse idiots.

“Okay... okay...” Ricardo seems to have come to a conclusion. He nods resolutely, turning all his considerably intense focus onto Chen who seems taken aback by it. Leaning forward into the other man’s space, slow enough that it’d be easy to shove him back, but of course Chen doesn’t. Ricardo’s hand went to the nape of his neck, lightly urging Chen forward, the other man obeying that silent request, and in the span of a breath, they’re kissing.

Your don’t avert your gaze, as much as you want to. 

This is a private thing, you shouldn’t look, shouldn’t stare like a pervert. 

‘Isn’t this what you knew would happen?’ Of course, your brain isn’t nice. 

This is what you wanted right, for them to get their act together. 

Humans falling in love with each other is normal and acceptable. (Although your education depicted of men and women falling in love, primarily). It happens all the time. 

Such emotion is a luxury a Re-Gene cannot afford, nor can they sincerely feel it, that’s what you were taught on the Farm. So resistant to the idea of going back to being treated as an unfeeling thing, your re-education had been particularly brutal.

“Whatever horrible thing your mind is telling you, it isn’t true.”

Once again caught off guard, lost in thought, you’re unprepared for Ricardo to kiss you. He tastes faintly of blueberry swirl ice cream and sweet tea, and maybe it’s your imagination, but maybe even a little bit like Chen. It’s that stray thought that has you jerk your head, trying to turn away from him. “W...what the hell, asshole?”

He snorted. “You know you sound really cute when you curse.” 

Baring your teeth, you snap, “Tomber d'une falaise!” Although the idiot clearly didn’t know what you said in French, basically telling him to fall off a cliff, it didn’t stop him from dramatically clutching at his chest, as if he’d been stabbed in the heart; he could probably guess it was at least an insult.

“Stop teasing him, Ricardo.” Chen admonished. Ricardo mock pouted. “I mean it. Can’t you see that he’s overwhelmed?”

“I am not overwhelmed!”, you vehemently protest.

“Out of your depth then,” Chen countered and before you could complain that it was pretty much the same thing, only with differing meanings, he continued on, “What our resident idiot is clumsily trying to show instead of explain, is that he wants both of us.”

“If you want a threesome, fine. It’ll have to wait, as I’m a bit physically impaired at the moment.” You’re almost surprised by the bitterness in your voice. 

Chen stared at you for a brief moment and then he braced both hands on either side of your wheelchair. Heart slowly turning over in your chest, oddly feeling as if you’re caught in the gaze of a hunter, you stubbornly keep eye contact for a second or two, but can’t maintain it for long. That doesn’t stop him from murmuring in your right ear, “Stop being so stubborn. Stop lying. You want this. To be in a relationship with both of us.”  A brief pause. “Correct?”

Fucking hell... 

Swallowing thickly, wondering the logistics of how that would work out. Wondering if you were about to once again make a horrible mistake. Then again, since you’d come back to Los Diablos, since Ortega found you again, that’s all you’ve been doing so far, haven’t you. Making mistake after mistake after mistake. 

“Yes.” 

As Chen’s left hand buried itself in your curls, taking control, tilting your head back, idly you wondered if the next time you hit the ground, if it’d hurt less. This is after a freefall into madness, it feels like, and twice as foolish. Yet you surrender, and you stop thinking, enjoy the kiss. 

[meganlpie]

Cast Out

Anonymous asked: What about a AU with Loki? He’s cast out and has to prove he’s worthy of returning to Asgard? He meets the reader and maybe she’s initially distrustful because of who he is but she realises he’s not as bad as she thought and helps him?

Here you go! I do not own Loki. He belongs to Marvel.

Warnings: AU(Asgard is just a kingdom. Loki doesn’t try to take over Earth). A little angst-ish. A teeny bit of fluff.

Pairings: Loki x fem!reader

Loki stormed toward his chambers, his fists clenched at his sides. How could his father do this to him? Sure, he’d made a few mistakes, but the last one wasn’t really his fault. How could he have known that Jane would leave Thor for him? He had never once given her any indication that he wanted her. But, because she’d run out of the royal wedding, it was the last straw for Odin.

         Loki had been cast out of his home. But all was not lost. If he could prove himself in another kingdom and stay out of mischief, Odin would let him return home. So, Loki packed a few things that meant the most to him and left his father’s kingdom.

         Odin sent him to far off place with a little bit of currency. Other than that, Loki would have to fend for himself. He had to find a home and get a job. He had to prove he was worthy of returning. The question was, how was he supposed to do that in a place where he knew no one and no one knew him? It wasn’t as if he could go up to the palace and announce himself as Prince Loki. That would prove Odin right. No, Loki knew he had to prove him wrong and manage on his own. He knew he could do it and he would.

*time skip*

         The first few days of his exile were uneventful for Loki. He had been staying at an inn in the small village. But now his funding was running low which meant it was time to search for a job. Loki had no clue where to start so he simply wandered the village. That was when he met you.

         You were walking through the village with a basket on your arm. It looked like you had just come from the marketplace. You were smiling as you walked like you didn’t have a care in the world. Until you saw Loki, that is. The smile dropped from your face and your eyes widened. You glanced around and saw that no one else was near the two of you. Then, you did exactly what Loki feared you would. You ran, dropping your basket in the process.

         Loki frowned. It seemed word of his dastardly deeds had traveled this far. He let out a sigh. He had hoped to get away from the mistakes he’s made in his youth. When he was younger, Loki had tried to take over another kingdom by brute force and magic. He knew better now and he deeply regretted his actions. Odin had publicly pardoned him for that years ago, but the effects still lingered apparently.

         Loki’s eyes dropped to the basket on the ground. Much to his surprise, none of the items had fallen out. He picked up the basket. His mind wandered. Should he find a way to return it or should he take it? Loki instantly shook his head. Taking it would once again prove that Odin was right and that he was selfish. Loki looked in the direction you had run and trailed after. It was difficult to see through the busy street of the village, but he managed. He thanked Odin for his tall stature.

         It didn’t take as long as Loki thought it would to find you. You were sitting on the steps of a small cottage at the edge of the village, your chin in your hand. Loki slowly approached you. As soon as you saw him, you sat straight up in fear. It looked like you were going to run again.

         "Please wait. I’m not going to hurt you. I am simply returning your basket.“ You stopped moving and looked at him in surprise. Loki held out the basket. He wouldn’t take another step until he knew you wouldn’t run. You slowly moved over to him and reached out for the basket. You reminded Loki of a frightened deer. Loki stayed perfectly still as you grabbed the basket, your fingers brushing against his.

         "Thank you,” you whispered. Loki gave you a nod and turned to leave. “I know you,” you said suddenly. Loki turned back to you. “I gathered when you ran away.” You bit your lip and glanced down at the ground. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have judged you so quickly.” Loki shrugged. “I did terrible things. I-I can understand why you ran off.”

         "Still, I usually don’t judge so harshly. How can I make it up to you?“ A hundred thoughts passed through Loki’s mind, not all of them innocent. But one thought kept pushing to the front. "Would you happen to know anyone looking to hire someone.” Your brows furrowed. “Why would you need a job? You’re a prince.” After letting out a loud sigh, Loki said, “It’s a long story.”

         "I’ve got time. You can tell me while I put these things away.“ You turned and opened the door. It took Loki a second to realize that you had invited him inside. Once he understood what was happening, he followed you. Loki scanned his surroundings. It was a very quaint space, a lot more cozy than the palace or the inn. It was neat with little touches here and there than made it your own. "Have a seat anywhere you’d like.

         Loki sat at the table where he could be close to you while you rummaged around to put things away. Once you got into a rhythm, you asked Loki again what he needed a job for. Loki wasn’t used to having anyone to talk to other than his mother and sometimes, he didn’t want to talk to her. So, to his surprise, he found himself telling you everything. He talked for what seemed like hours about what had led him to your home.

         "And now, my funds are nearly gone. It is time for me to find a job.” You nodded. You had sat across from him with a glass of wine after you’d finished your chore. “I think I can help you. Do you like to read?” Loki’s face lit up. He assured you that he loved it. You grinned. “Well, I could use some help at the library. It’s become quite popular recently and it’s becoming too much for me to handle on my own. As for the inn, I think I have a solution there as well.”

         Loki took a sip of his own and gestured for you to continue. You were being so kind to him. It was a nice change from earlier. “You could stay here. My home is more than big enough for the both of us. And who knows, perhaps we could be friends one day.” Loki took a chance and reached over to lay a hand over yours.

         "Are you certain?“ You nodded and he asked, "Why? You were afraid of me only a few hours ago.” You turned your hand over so you could squeeze his. Loki tried to ignore the warm feeling that spread through his body. “Because I believe you deserve a second chance, Loki. You aren’t as bad as the stories made you out to be. I want to help you prove to your father that you can be the prince he wants you to be.”

         Loki stared at you in disbelief. You were showing him kindness he’d never seen before. You were even willing to help him even though you knew what he had done in the past and you barely knew him. He counted himself lucky to have met such a wonderful woman after he’d been cast out. Loki knew that, as long as he had you on his side, it wouldn’t take him long to be released from his exile. And who knew? Maybe he would grow to like it there. With you.

Tagging: @brewsthespirit-blog @ghostie-writes @aikibriarrose @jotink78 @esoltis280 @iwillbeinmynest @mala-firebringer @thomashiddlestonloveloki @wanderinglittlefangirl