#indian bridal hair

[meshatoor]

SATYA PAUL 🐆

@kunaphotography | @safinakataria @bhatiafashions | with @modelmechanisms

[brioso123]

Best Bridal Look for Weddings and Engagements | Brioso Services

Brioso is a well-known and reputable Best Makeup Artist in Pune, India. Contact us if you require makeover services. We are experts in the hair and makeup for brides. Sonal Burde considers your wedding day to be the most significant occasion of your life.

[hkhair]

Buy Stylish Hair Bands for Girls Online| HK Hair

Explore our trendy collection of hair bands for girls at HK Hair. From butterfly hair bands to unique designs, find the perfect hair band accessories for any occasion!

For More Information:-https://hkhair.in/product-category/hair-band/

[ssbollywoodmakeup]

Eid Al-Adha, the Festival of Sacrifice, celebrates faith and devotion with prayers, feasts, and sharing with the less fortunate. Wishing everyone a blessed Eid!

[sjscollection]

Catalog Name:*Shimmering Fancy Women Necklaces & Chains* Base Metal: Brass & Copper Plating: 1Gram Gold Stone Type: Cubic Zirconia/American Diamond Sizing: Adjustable Type: Necklace Sizes: Free Size Dispatch: 2 Days #wedding #collection #bridal #hair #accessories #love #fashion #instagood #photography #india #pretty #style #indianwedding #swag #jewelry #designer #bride #jewellery #indian #new #uk #cool #mumbai #canada #photooftheday #fashionista #instagram (at India mumbai) https://www.instagram.com/p/CmXazuLL8hQ/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[kaurtrends]

Pakistani Paranda in trends #pranda #pakistani #traditional #jaggo #hairstyle #kaurtrends

Pakistani Paranda in trends #pranda #pakistani #traditional #jaggo #hairstyle #kaurtrends

[shaadiwish]

Check out stunning matha patti designs we saw on real brides. For more such bridal jewellery inspirations, visit ShaadiWish.com.

[aahanna]

The Story of Solah Shringar

The Indian bride is the epitome of grace, elegance, and beauty. Her attire and traditional Indian bridal jewelry catch every eye and leave a lasting impression on everyone. While her wedding outfit accentuates her best features, her Indian bridal jewelry adds a subtle shine and a touch of sophistication to her entire look.

As per tradition, the Indian bride embellishes herself with 16 adornments on her wedding day. These adornments are called Solah Shringar. This ritual has been practiced since ancient times and is an integral part of bridal preparations.

The story behind the Solah Shringar features Rati, the wife of Kamdev, the Hindu god of love. Rati engaged in severe penance to appease Goddess Lakshmi. She was then blessed with the 16 adornments from Lakshmi and wore them to impress and marry Kamdev.

16 adornments (16 sringar)are

1. Sindoor

The first adornment is Sindoor, also known as kumkum or vermillion. Sindoor holds a special place as it marks the beginning of a woman’s new journey as a bride. Sindoor is applied by the groom on the forehead between the hair partition of the bride. The bride then continues to wear sindoor throughout her married life.

2. Hair care (Kesh Sringar):

We now focus on the ‘Kesh’, or hair. The Indian bride embellishes her hair using fragrant flowers and glittering headpieces. Traditionally, the bride made three braids that represented three holy rivers, Ganga, Yamuna, and Saraswati, and the trinity of the Hindu gods Brahma, Vishnu, and Mahesh. The fragrance of flowers keeps the bride fresh throughout the day and her Indian bridal jewelry embellishes her hairdo, adding another layer of elegance and beauty to her overall look.

3. Maangtika

The part of the forehead where the maangtika rests is believed to be the home of Ajna Chakra or the third eye. When the bride wears the piece of Indian bridal jewelry on her special day, she is believed to be connected with her third eye and has the ability to control her emotions and activate her knowledge, wisdom, courage, and willpower.

4. Bindi

The bindi also takes us to the third eye. Bindi comes from the Sanskrit word bindu, which means ‘point’ or ‘dot’. The bindi is closely associated with improving concentration and retaining energy. It is one of the most popular adornments worn by the Indian bride and is known internationally.

5.Kohl or Kajal

From the forehead, we move to the eyes. Kohl, kajal, surma, kanmashi, kaadige, kaatuka, and kan mai are some names for one of the oldest natural beauty products in the world. Kajal accentuates the eyes of the bride and is believed to ward off the evil eye in various cultures. The darkening around the eyes also protects the wearer from the harsh rays of the sun.

Kajal is an essential element of the solah shringar and makes the eyes look more prominent. It is undoubtedly a beautiful way to enhance the natural beauty of the bride.

6 .Karn Phool or Earrings

A wedding day look cannot be completed without a set of dangling earrings. Karn Phool is a Sanskrit term that translates to ‘flower of the ears’ and is an essential part of the solah shringar.

7 .Nath(nose ring)

The nose ring is another beautiful element of the Indian bride’s attire and is a symbol of valor, fertility, and spirituality. The large nose rings hooked onto the hair with a chain take the bride a step closer to creating her ideal look. It is one of the most ethnic elements of Indian bridal jewelry and a wedding day look is surely incomplete without it.

8 .Haar or Necklace

The one thing that brings the whole look together is the necklace. Necklaces are said to represent safety and abundance and are believed to help the wearer control their emotions better. Some necklaces feature specific motifs or gemstones that are believed to bring good luck and ward off evil spirits.

9 .Bajuband

This element of traditional Indian bridal jewelry is worn on the upper arm. The bajuband is believed to keep evil spirits away and protects the wearer. The Indian bride can embellish her wedding outfit with all sorts of armbands that are encrusted with diamonds and other colorful gemstones.

10 .Bangles, Bracelets, Choodiyan

Bangles and the Indian bride are inseparable. They’re a part of traditional Indian bridal jewelry that a woman always wears. It is believed that bangles and bracelets bring health, luck, and prosperity to the wearer and are more than a jewelry item or accessory for the traditional Indian woman. There are various wedding ceremonies related to bangles and bracelets across cultures that show us their significance in Indian culture.

11 .Hathphool and Aarsi

The hathphool is a clever mix of a bangle and a ring. Bringing the best of both together, this element of traditional Indian bridal jewelry embellishes the hand and wrist of the bride. The interesting crossover of the two pieces surely adds more flavor to the wedding day look.

A thumb ring known as Aarsi is also worn by some brides. Aarsi contains a small mirror. This mirror allows the bride to catch a glimpse of the groom since she is covered in a veil and cannot see the groom’s face.

12 . Mehndi

Henna, commonly known as mehndi, is undoubtedly one of the most amusing parts of a traditional Indian wedding. It is believed that mehndi brings good luck and joy to the bride. The darkness of the mehndi represents the strength of the bond between the bride and the groom. The solah shringar of the bride is incomplete without her hands and feet embellished with beautiful mehndi designs that add to her overall wedding day look.

13 . Kamarband (waist band)

The use of the kamarband, or waistband, is scarce in North Indian weddings but it is an important part of a South Indian bride’s trousseau. The piece of Indian bridal jewelry is adorned with gemstones and is used to accentuate the female’s body and keep her bridal saree in place.

14 . Anklets and Toe Rings

Commonly known as payal and bichhu, these elements of traditional Indian bridal jewelry embellish the feet of the bride. Payals can be recognized by the beautiful chime sounds they make whenever the bride walks. Toe rings are seen as a sign of marriage and a bride wears them until the death of her husband.

15 . Itar

Itar is the perfume that a bride applies to freshen her aura and stay fragrant throughout her special day.

16. Wedding Outfit

Finally, the one thing that clubs every element together and brings the bride’s imagination to life is the wedding outfit. The traditional Indian bride wore the classic red wedding outfit but with the evolution of Indian weddings, other colors have started to take center stage as well.

Source

[itz-stus]

Helloo!! I loved your headcannons can you perhaps write a head cannon for Dazai with a sleepy s/o like sleepy cuddles. I would love to see it. Thank youu!!!

Hello! Thank you for this beautiful request so here are some headcannons hope you like them anon.

Masterlist

Sleepy Cuddling

Dazai loves cuddles. That is a fact. Any chance he has to be affectionate to you, he will use it.

It’s his way of showing his immense love for you and he’s prefer to die in your embrace more than anything.

He's a tall guy so for him it's like being able to touch love.

If you prefer to be the little spoon he loves it.

He loves when your sleepyhead just snuggles in his chest. It's like getting hit by something so warm that his empty heart can't cool down.

I think he is that type of guy who will cup your breast just for fun.

If your like really tired after work and like if you have back pain he would give you a little massage as you drift to sleep.

He loves it when you let him lay on your chest massaging his scalp with your fingers detangleing his hair. It makes his mind clear out

Dazai doesn't sleeps often but he feels something so peaceful with he's in your arms just resting as the moon light lights the room.

And for the Indian s/o there will be like just you two cuddling as light music just flows in the room

Dazai and you were on the couch as he saw how tired you were as you were on top on him nuzzling into his neck as he gave you little kisses on you neck and shoulder as light retro music flowed in the room that you loved. He loved these moments where it was just You, Him and nothing but love.

He occasionally rubbed his finger combing you hair. As he felt you breath even out as you became more related and eventually fell asleep. He kissed you forehead as he tried to get up so you both could get some were comfortable.

He felt a tug when you mumbed sleepily "Abhi nahi~ 5 min. More" making him chuckle

"Bella just taking you to the bed so you don'tcomplain about your back pain again." He teased as he carried you bridal style to your shared bedroom.

[presidentlokis-hornyhelmet]

Hi my fav writer, i got u more ideas ehe

Black cat!Reader x Pavitr

― You and Pavitr both had secret identitys and tried to keep it from each other as you both were dating but both of you guys mess up as when you guys found each others suit in each others dorms while you guys tried visiting each other.

Tutor!Reader x Tutee!Pavitr

― You basically tutor your bf, Pavitr as he faisl his class just to get you to tutor him vut he basically gets jelly when he learns that you started tutoring others teens than him.

Princess!Reader x Prince!Pavitr

― This one's actually an au instead if you can make it work but, basically, your parents decided that they wanted to get you married as soon as possible and you thought you wouldnt even like who your parents would introduce to you(same w pavi tbh) but then you both actually start to fall for eachother.

Always sleepy/tired!Reader x Doesnt care!Pavitr

― You're always tired and sleepy so one day, Pavitr just decides to carry you bridal style/on his back while you peppered his face with tired and soft kisses.

Photographer!Reader x Pavitr

― Showing Pavitr your album of candid polaroids of you nd him and shit while you guys sit down in your bed with the fairylights of your room and the lamp beside your bed being the only light sources that you guys have.

Barista!Reader x Barista!Pavitr

― You and Pavitr are both baristas at the same café and you both get scolded at after accidentally being caught on camera making out/kissing cuz you both work the night shift tgt.

Write well (ᗒᗣᗕ)՞ 🫶

Breathless

❤️MASTERLIST🕸️

Pairing: Always sleepy/tired!Reader x Doesnt care!Pavitr Summary: You're always tired and sleepy so one day, Pavitr just decides to carry you bridal style/on his back while you peppered his face with tired and soft kisses.

Also read on AO3

🎶If our love was a fairy tale I would charge in and rescue you On a yacht, baby, we would sail To an island where we'd say I do And if we had babies they would look like you It'd be so beautiful if that came true You don't even know how very special you are You just walked out of one of my dreams So beautiful, you're leaving me breathless🎶 Breathless (by Shayne Ward)

Your legs were killing as you walked into your home. It was a hectic week and work was just unforgiving. Unable to take a step further, you collapse onto the couch, sighing in pleasure as you were finally able to stretch. It wasn't as soft as a mattress (which is just a few steps away), but even this was heavenly for your exhausted back. Soon, your eyes grow heavy and droop.

"Welcome home, Y/N baby!"

Pavitr cheerily greets you as he exits the kitchen holding a tray of piping hot chai and your favourite snacks, but stops short. A warm smile pulls across his face when he sees you softly snoring, curled up in a foetal position on the couch.

He puts the tray down on the coffee table and grabs a throw pillow to keep it under your head, but the motion disturbs you and you shoot up, confused and panicked. "Wha-!?"

"Shhh, meri jaan, go to sleep", he whispers, petting your hair to lull you back to slumber.

"No, no, I'm awake! Just taking a nap, I'm awake now. Fully attentive", you say, getting up, poorly hiding your yawn.

"Meri jaan, baby, it's okay-", Pavitr tries but you wave him off, insisting that you're fine.

You had promised him earlier that you'd be up all night, watching and cheering with him for the Indian team in the ODI. But the week had been exhausting, you weren't even able to get a shut-eye. Pavitr has been a caring, patient boyfriend to you and you really wanted to show yours by cheering his favourite team. It's the least you can do.

"Okay...", Pavitr says, giving you a knowing side eye and turning on the match.

As much as he was thrilled about watching the World Cup with you, he knows you're tired and loves you too much to make you sit through this; he doesn't want to make this a liability. To Pavitr, Quality Time is what both of you enjoy doing together. Something that isn't one-way.

The teams enter and you guys cheer, chanting their name as the camera pans in on each of the players. By the time they do the toss, you've already dozed off again.

Pavitr is alerted by the soft snores coming his way and turns to see you on the couch, your legs bent under your lap as you curl yourself in an awkward position.

Putting away your half-eaten snacks, he manoeuvres you, pulling your legs to lie across his lap and gently massages your feet. A smile caresses his face feeling you relax into the couch. His fingers gently brush the small strand of hair that falls on your forehead, making you exhale deeply.

His heart is full as he watches you, captivated.

And if we had babies they would look like youIt'd be so beautiful if that came trueYou don't even know how very special you are

Pavitr scoops you up in his arms bridal style, bringing you to your shared bedroom. The movement disturbs you out of your slumber once again.

Your eyelids flutter open, your beautiful eyes looking into his as you wrap your arms around his neck, peppering his face with tired, soft kisses.

You leave me breathlessYou're everything good in my lifeYou leave me breathlessI still can't believe that you're mine

"Pav.."

"Hmm?"

"Who won?"

A chuckle escapes his lips as he opens the bedroom door with his hip. "Not yet, meri jaan. But we did win the toss!"

Exhaustion is quick to take over and your face finds comfort in the crook of his neck, inhaling his cologne as you doze off, your little breaths hot on his skin.

He can't take his eyes off you, like he has been ever since he met you.

You must have been sent from heaven to earth to change meYou're like an angelThe thing that I feel is stronger than love believe meYou're something special

He lays you down upon the mattress, pulling the comforter over you and departing with a soft kiss to your forehead. But when he reaches the door, Pavitr can't help not taking his eyes off you.

I only hope that I'll one day deserve what you've given meBut all I can do is try every day of my life

How on earth are you his? It's like living in a dream..

You leave me breathlessYou're everything good in my lifeYou leave me breathlessI still can't believe that you're mine

Unable to resist, he comes back to steal a kiss from your lips.

You just walked out of one of my dreamsSo beautiful, you're leaving me breathless, breathless

Somehow, even without doing anything, you always leave him breathless.

______

Hope you like it! <3 I really want to do all the prompts and i hope soon i will <333333333333333333333

[deathlessathanasia]

Wait what part of the Dionysiaca states that Hera keeps the dress she lost her virginity in? That’s so weird…

It is in the beginning of Book 32, in which Nonnos reworks the Dios Apate scene from Iliad 14 in his typical and infuriating long-winded way:

Aphrodite was won. The mistress of wiles obeyed the cunning request, and drawing the cestus up from her bosom she bestowed it upon willing Hera, and thus she spoke and described the witchery of the strap: ""Accept this strap to help your trouble. You shall charm all in one with this cestus, the guide to all desire — Sun and Zeus and the company of stars, and the evermoving stream of boundless Ocean."" This said, she plunged beneath the rocks of Assyrian Libanos. But Hera passed to the starscattered circle of Olympos. Quickly she decked out her allwhite body. Often she guided the straying clusters of floating hair and arranged them in even rows down to her forehead; she touched up the plaits with sweetscented oil — stir it, and the farspreading scent of the unguent intoxicates heaven and sea and the whole earth. She put on her head a coronet of curious work, set with many rubies, the servants of love; when they move, the Cyprian flame sends out bright sparklings. She wore also that stone which draws man to desire, which has the bright name of the desire-struck Moon; and the stone which is enamoured of iron the loveproducing""; and the Indian stone of love, offspring itself of the waters and akin to the Foamborn; and the deep blue sapphire still beloved of Phoibos. About her hair she twined that herb of passion which Cythereia loves as much as the rose, as much as the anemone, which she wears when she is about to mingle her love with Myrrha's son. She bound the unaccustomed cestus about and about her flanks; but the embroidered robe she wore was her oldest, still bearing the bloodmarks of maidenhead left from her bridal, to remind her bedfellow of their first love when she came to her brother a virgin in that secret union. She washed her face, and wrapt about her a shining robe and clasped it with a brooch to lock up her tunic. Having thus adorned herself and surveyed all in the mirror, Hera sped through the air, swift as a bird, swift as a thought.

[brioso123]

Sonal Burde, a Top Makeup Artist in Pune | Brioso Services

Brioso's owner Sonal Burde uses high-quality products and has an acute eye for how different skin tones will effect the way the makeup appears, Sonal Burde is the Best Makeup Artist in Pune. You are wearing such lovely, natural-looking cosmetics on this very momentous day in your life.

[ssbollywoodmakeup]

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[latestblogz]

Looking for premium quality american diamond jewellery set, bridal jewellery set, or any other exquisite jewellery at affordable prices? Look no further than Noori by Nikita! They offer a wide variety of stunning pieces, including hair accessories, perfect for any occasion. They also provide service of sending rakhi Abroad or anywhere in India. Visit their website or book an appointment at their Delhi NCR shop to explore our collection and discover the perfect piece for you.

[fashionthroughtimewithlucy]

Woodstock.

Woodstock, the most famous of the 1960s rock festivals, held on a farm property in Bethel, New York, August 15–18, 1969, at the end of the hippie movement. The hippie flower child look from the late 1960's carried over into the first half of the 1970's, in a non-restrictive bohemian silhouette with a heavy folksy influence. Arts and crafts had a huge impact on fashion during this time including tie-dye, batik, knitwear, crochet and macrame.

1970s Gunne Sax dresses.

Gunne Sax's aesthetic has been described as feminine, nostalgic, Victorian, old world and romantic. Though the brand is now closely associated with formal and bridal wear, its origins date back to late '60s San Francisco.  In 1969, San Francisco boutique Gunne Sax needed a house designer. Enter Jessica McClintock, an elementary school teacher with a life-long interest in fashion. When a friend told McClintock of the opening at Gunne Sax, she applied immediately. McClintock was hired despite her lack of formal training in fashion design or clothing manufacture. Herself and designer Laura Ashley popularized the prairie dress phenomenon.

Sometimes referred to as Granny or prairie dresses, a typical Gunne Sax dress of the early 1970s featured a banded Empire waist and a long maxi-skirt. Lace trim, high collars and long sleeves evoked an amalgam of past eras and created an overall impression of demure femininity.

Vogue Italia March 1970.

Twiggy for Vogue 1970

Thea Porter, Godmother of Bohemian Cheque.

Thea Porter, who is credited with bringing the bohemian look to London catwalks. Although Thea Porter is not as famous a name as Mary Quant or Laura Ashley, her influence on the look of her era is just as potent. Her loose, draped shapes and fabrics helped create the style of stars such as Faye Dunaway and Elizabeth Taylor in the 1970s, and they have since become forever entangled with the idea of rock-star self-indulgence. She celebrated ethnic styles in Indian style prints, free flowing breezy gauzy tent dresses and wide legged pants.

Porter's seven signature looks: the Abaya & Kaftan; the Gipsy dress; the Fraye dress; the Brocade-panel dress; the Wrap-over dress; the Chazara jacket, and the Sirwal skirt, as well as important fashion photography from the pages of Vogue, Harper's Bazaar and Women's Wear.

Changing skirt sizes.

This was the year of the changing hemline. There is no longer one length for one woman, but a whole wardrobe of lengths from which to choose. Mini, regular, midi and maxi length. Both emerald and bottle green were popular colours of the 1970s along with rust, wine red, purple, orange, and brown.

Tom Wolfe called the 1970s the "me decade" Across the land, Americans seemed determined to escape from the wars and social movements of the previous decade. Disillusionment with national and global action led many to look inward and find solace in discovering more about themselves. Women demanded respect as equal partners, and began to emerge into the work place. As women asserted themselves economically, socially, and politically, the idea of remaining trapped in an unhappy marriage became less and less appealing. Consequently, the divorce rate soared. An 1974 book entitled the courage to divorce  encouraged individuals to put their own happiness above that of their spouses and children.

Every rule of fashion was shattered in the 1970s. Lapels, ties, and collars, reached record widths. The polyester leisure suit, available in a palette of citrus and pastel colors, was extremely popular among young males. The jacket, pants, and vest were often worn with an open collar to display thick necklace chains nestled in exposed chest hair. A senses of masculine style emerged in the film 'Annie Hall' which created a sensation with Diane Keaton wearing a fitted vest with a collard white shirt and men's neckties.

[amomentwiser]

We need to stop acting like people -- women especially -- going through painful procedures is normal.

"Beauty is pain" is such bullshit. I've been told that was something I had to get used to, what with being a little girl and all. As if "beauty" has a single definition. We decide what the definition of "beauty" is, and I've decided that body hair is included in that definition. I say this because today someone, once again, commented on the fact I don't shave at my ripe old age of 21. ("You'd look so much prettier if you did just this one little thing," they say, referring to the act of putting hot wax on one's skin and ripping it off.)

Hurting ourselves over constantly-changing beauty standards is so normalised, and I fucking hate it. It makes me so angry I want to cry, and then tell every teenager who hates themself right now to please stop. To take them in my arms, and shield them from a world hell-bent on skewing their perception of what a human looks like. I want to protect them and never let them see those toxic "how to surprise your boyfriend for Valentine's Day *wink* " or "how to prep for hot girl summer" articles.

When I first found out what a Brazilian wax was, I was horrified. I couldn't believe people voluntarily did this to themselves.

But they -- the media and the magazines and the beauty industry -- do such a good job of conditioning you to believe that your body is dirty, that thick hair is something to be ashamed of, that that horror has been replaced by a new one -- the fear that no one will ever love me, or find me attractive, if I do not conform.

We've been taught our body hair is bad since SUCH a young age. Fuck, as an Indian, I was even taught darker skin is bad. Bleaching skin is SO common in India; the fairness cream ads are utterly shameless and ubiquitous. My mother casually talks about how she went for skin bleaching before her wedding -- part of the "bridal makeup", I suppose. In a country of dark-skinned, hairy people, we look to blonde, fair-skninned Hollywood stars for guidance. And OF COURSE we fall short. Beauty standards like that were never meant for us; in idolising them we set ourselves up to fail.

Does anyone else see how insidious and sinister this plot is? To start conditioning people to hate themselves right when they are babies -- through their mothers who hate their own bodies and pass these insecurities on; through main characters in TV shows and books who are only ever one kind of pretty; via movies where the 'unattractive, unpopular teen' turns sterotypically beautiful, and only then becomes 'cool' or worthy of love; through magazines geared to audiences as young as twelve, telling them to alter their appearance in order to be deemed desirable.

What a masterstroke:

To inextricably connect beauty with lovability, so that our fear of not having good enough hair, skin or makeup turns into a fear of being unlovable.

The former they mock -- "women take so long to get ready!" "Heather cares too much about her makeup" -- while the existence of the latter is normalised or ignored: "Everyone has insecurities. Everyone hates their body." Yeah, WHY? It doesn't need to be that way.

They make people believe the pain is worth it. They give the illusion that you have a choice, that you've made this decision -- to get that brazilian wax or boob lift or nose job -- but you've been led here all your life. They make us believe that the pain is a worth it, a stepping stone to get something far more valuable -- others' love and approval. You've been influenced to believe certain things are desirable. You've been taught your natural existence, isn't. Does this count as acting under your own volition if you've been born into a world that's been pressuring you, in direct and subliminal ways, since the day you were born?

The pain is not worth it, and I will not let them make me torture myself. I do not exist for their aesthetic pleasure. I exist to experience the earth and what it is like to be a human, to eat food and watch sunsets and frolic in the grass and hug friends.

Repeat after me:

I do not exist for other people's aesthetic pleasure.

Fuck everyone. I'm so done.

No more shame.

No more hiding my legs with jeans and long skirts.

I have body hair. Not only on my hands and legs, but on my fingers and toes as well. I have an almost-unibrow. And you know what? I have decided it is beautiful. One day I will find people who agree, and goddammit, I will be loved by them.

And if I can't, fine.

I will yearn for love, and maybe I will be desperate and lonely, but I WILL NOT change myself for someone to love me. Because that wouldn't be real love in the first place. They wouldn't be loving me, not really. They would be loving the actor who is playing me. And I would still feel lonely, only this time in their company.

A boyfriend whose love I'd constantly be afraid of losing; afraid he would find out what a monster I really am. I'd hold on to my shame and keep it buried in the darkest recesses of my mind: the natural habitat of insecurity.

But the thing is: any relationship that requires you to hide parts of yourself is not real love at all.

So, I reiterate: I. Am. Done.

With the beauty standards about hair, skin colour, makeup, eyebrows, glasses, weight, boob or butt or dick size (?? Why are these even a thing? I genuinely don't get it), height, teeth, everything.

I don't fit them. It's okay.

(It's not always okay. My self-esteem swings from finding myself absolutely repulsive some days, to remembering I've been conditioned to be this way, then feeling years-old rage (how dare they brainwash me to hate myself so?) and grief (how much more confident a person could I have been if I hadn't been made to feel trapped in my own skin).

It goes from sunny skies of heartfelt gratitude (my body is healthy, it does so much for me, keeps me alive and helps me experience the world) to the dark pits of self-loathing (no one could ever love me; I shouldn't subject people to my hideous existence) -- to wishful thinking (all my problems would be solved if only I were as pretty as them; how do people look like that??)

But through it all, I will be my natural, hairy, big brown self -- and anyone who has a problem with it can go to Hell and suck Satan's dick.