#incredibly funny of me to go oh yes it's about the daddy issues with chloe and nadine

[jaggedwolf]

okay maybe chloe realizing what the final ganesha-parashurama puzzle means is up there with nate realizing how libertalia's rulers died

[sophygurl]

heh. @c-l-ford​ gave me all of the main characters from both Lucifer and Leverage for the character questions thing. This should be interesting. And long. 

Lucifer

Lucifer: 

do I like them: you betcha!

5 good qualities: he’s clever, he loves his family - much as he tries to deny it, he’s extremely talented at playing the piano, he’s a wonderful model of hedonism being about what’s pleasurable for all and not about a single-minded pursuit of what’s pleasurable for one in disregard for other’s desires, and he actually quite cares about humans and wants them to be good and not make it to hell. 

3 bad qualities: he’s more than a tad self-absorbed at times, he is quick to blame/judge others for their failings, and dude often has to make the same mistake many times before learning from it.

favourite episode/etc: A Good Day to Die, 2x13 where he goes to hell to get the formula to save Chloe

otp: Deckerstar

brotp: Lucifer x Amenadiel 

ot3: Don’t particularly have one for him. Sexytimes with any 2 ppl he wants, but I don’t really romantically ship him with anyone but Chloe (possible Mazikeen, but not WITH Chloe. and I could see either Linda or Maze as someone for fun sexytimes but not with one another or Chloe involved, so, yea. no ot3 for the dude we often see in 3somes (and moresomes))

notp: Any of his family members - he seems totally grossed out by the idea, himself. 

best quote: Don’t have a specific one, but any time he reminds ppl that he has no qualms about the gender of who he has sex with or is attracted to is fantastic. 

head canon: Mostly ones that really make me cry if I think about them for too long, having to do with his relationships with his family - particularly his dad. Like, for example, that he was a total daddy’s boy before their falling out and that’s part of why it hurts him so incredibly much. 

Chloe Decker:

do I like them: yes ma’am!

5 good qualities: she’s such a good mommy, she is loyal af once she’s let someone into her inner circle, she’s driven af in her career, she is able to maintain a high sense of professionalism while allowing for Lucifer’s quirks as her partner, she’s one of the few ppl not let in on the Big Secret and yet she is still cool with all of these wacky people that have entered her life since meeting Lucifer like whatever these folks are weirdos but they’re my weirdos now. 

3 bad qualities: she can be a little bit naive??, she often puts work above personal life stuff which can hurt her relationships and cause her to be a bit strained emotionally, she needs to work on that flirting game if she wants to do undercover work lol

favourite episode/etc: Quid Pro Ho, 2x10 - the trial where she talks about Lucifer’s honesty, etc. 

otp: Deckerstar

brotp: Chloe x Maze 

ot3: None for her, she’s monogamous. 

notp: No major ones, though I’d not particularly enjoy her and Dan getting back together. They work best as friends, I think. 

best quote: ugh, I’m bad at specific quotes. probably some snarky thing she said to Lucifer.

head canon: There’s a part of her that does, in fact, believe everything Lucifer tells her about who he and his family really are. She’s just not ready to accept it, yet. Until she’s ready to accept it, there’s nothing he’ll be able to do to prove it to her. But eventually, one day, she’s going to put it all together and just sort of ... know it. Then she’ll have a million questions.

Mazikeen:

do I like them: yea, she’s amazing.

5 good qualities: character development like whoa, she’s totally kick ass, she’d do literally anything for the small handful of folks she cares about, she’s learned to be vulnerable and to value vulnerability in others which is amazing, sexy af. 

3 bad qualities: like Lucifer she can be kinda self involved at times, she enjoys the torturing maybe a hair too much, can be really mean without intending to be

favourite episode/etc: Mr and Mrs. Mazikeen Smith, 3x3 - her Canadian adventure

otp: none as of yet

brotp: with Lucifer, obvi

ot3: none as of yet - perhaps Linda and Amenadiel???

notp: no one in particular

best quote: Self worth comes from within, bitches. 

head canon: She’s gonna get accepted into heaven some day.

Amenadiel:

do I like them: amen!

5 good qualities: he has learned to be so kind - wow character development!, he loves his family sfm, he finds cues of goodness and forgiveness and worth all around him even at his worst, is driven by a sense of purpose even when he feels lost as to what that purpose may be, hot af

3 bad qualities: can be a bit rigid in his thinking, is still overcoming some of his judgmental stuff, doesn’t always think through the consequences of his actions

favourite episode/etc: also A Good Day to Die - the way he and Lucifer worked together on that was so amazing I love them so much

otp: no one really, though I enjoy his relationships with both Linda and Maze

brotp: with Lucifer of course

ot3: idk with Linda and Maze!!?

notp: with Lucifer/any family, also would be horrified at the thought of him and Chloe

best quote: I don’t have an exact quote for this, but when he was telling Lucifer about the significance of his getting his wings back over and over and how it proves that their Father can forgive anything and how that gives him hope. *tears up*

head canon: He’ll get his own wings and angel powers back once he’s forgiven himself. God never took them away from him...

Linda Martin:

do I like them: Oh yes very much.

5 good qualities: So smart, so funny, so compassionate, so open minded, has some mysterious past that we still don’t know about please tell us Linda!!

3 bad qualities: Uhmmmm.... hmmmm .... I’m sure she has some but none are coming to mind. 

favourite episode/etc: Oh, whatever episode it was that she found out the truth - er, probably not that episode because her seeing Lucifer’s true face was the end but the next one where we see her dealing with it all and trying to accept it and accept these supernatural people in her life for who they are. Linda is so amazing u all!

otp: No otp, but I did dig her and Amenadiel’s thing. But not if it’s gonna hurt Maze - which I think they’d both also not wanna do anything to hurt her, so that’s cool. I hope. 

brotp: Linda/Mazikeen for sure. 

ot3: As said above, her and Amenadiel and Mazikeen together could be interesting?

notp: Her and Lucifer. Like, it was fun when it was a thing but I was a lot more comfortable with them as both friends and client/therapist once they stopped having sex. 

best quote: idk - something wise she says to Lucifer during a session most likely.

head canon: I can’t think of any. 

Leverage

Nathan Ford:

do I like them: meh

5 good qualities: he hates the rich, he’s incredibly intelligent, he’s protective of his people, he’s wily, he not only thinks six steps ahead but can think on his feet to adjust the plans as necessary

3 bad qualities: he can be selfish af, his character arc was kinda boring to me?, he tends to wallow

favourite episode/etc: I’m gonna be bad at this category for this show because I haven’t watched it recently to remember specific episodes oooops.

otp: with Sophie

brotp: also with Sophie? I feel like they were sort of the two on the same footing with the others being somewhat dependent on them so while they were all a family, he didn’t allow himself to connect as equals with any of the others.

ot3: none

notp: idk who else did ppl ship him with? I can’t picture him with anyone besides his ex and Sophie tbh

best quote:  Sophie Devereaux is the finest actress you've ever seen…when she's breaking the law.

head canon: After he and Sophie leave the other 3 to it, he checks in on them from time to time. That is to say - he always knows what they’re up to and how they’re doing and occasionally when they find themselves in a bind, he just sort of shows up out of the blue like “I knew this was gonna end up being a plan M situation, and I didn’t wanna lose Hardison quite yet...”

Sophie Devereaux: 

do I like them: She’s alright.

5 good qualities: Elegant af, amazing actress as long as she’s breaking the law, loves her 3 socially awkward children and wants them to do well in life, takes no shit from Nate, has a strangely positive outlook on the world for the kind of work she does.

3 bad qualities: Such a bad actress when she’s on stage, again her character arc wasn’t super interesting to me, and uh IDK what else - she’s mostly pretty fab.

favourite episode/etc: no clue, see above.

otp: With Nate, although honestly I think she could do better??

brotp: With Tara, probs.

ot3: None.

notp: With any of the team other than Nate. It would be weird.

best quote: no clue

head canon: Sophie also checks up on the kids after they leave them to their own devices, but she does it in her own way. She’ll show up to their apartment after a draining job with an organic pizza and some beers and have her feet up in a comfy chair and ask them to come tell her all about it. When they’re having relationship issues, she seems to magically know about it before anyone tells her, and she’ll take them each aside for a lil chat and help them work through whatever is bugging them. Then she slips away before they even have a chance to say goodbye. 

Eliot Spencer:

do I like them: Boy, howdy!

5 good qualities: When it counts he is so gentle and kind, has more emotional intelligence than you realize, is ridiculously knowledgeable about a ridiculous amount of things, cranky chef af, loves his adorkable nerd and sweet sociopath and would do anything for them (but would never admit that)

3 bad qualities: Doesn’t communicate that emotional intelligence enough, thinks he’s only good for his brawn :(, can be a lil intolerant and fussy 

favourite episode/etc: Can’t think of the name, but the one with the kid that he bonds with and protects? I loved him so much in that one, especially.

otp: none....

brotp: with Hardison, also with Nate I think

ot3: Hardison and Parker, OBVI

notp: never with Nate or Sophie

best quote: hmmm not sure, something about food probs.

head canon: When he snuggles with Parker and Hardison? He’s the little little spoon. Don’t tell me otherwise, I’m not listening!

Alec Hardison: 

do I like them: yup!

5 good qualities: so smart, so brave, so open-hearted, so funny, so adorable!

3 bad qualities: does Not like being wrong or making a mistake, can be over-confident at times, can also be overly pessimistic at times

favourite episode/etc: Oh probably the pretzels one. Like he is just so patient and open with Parker. I just ... *tearing up*

otp: with Parker

brotp: with Eliot

ot3: with Parker AND Eliot 

notp: no one I can think of actively anti-shipping him with

best quote: The pretzels thing. 

head canon: He’s the one who finally brings Eliot in to the relationship with Parker. 

Parker:

do I like them: uh yea, she’s only one of my all-time fave characters

5 good qualities: she’s hilarious, she’s been so traumatized and she’s still so open to people like??? she doesn’t know How to connect with ppl but she Wants to so bad???, so fucking competent at everything she does, extreme desire to help others once she’s had a small taste of it, her idea of a great time is jumping off buildings and blowing things up and she is legit confused when she realizes that not everyone likes those things????!

3 bad qualities: nothing. she’s perfect. leave me alone.

favourite episode/etc: ALL of them, IDK, maybe at the end when Nate hands her the reigns it makes the most sense in the world alflgfjfhgskjalhfhgf

otp: with Hardison

brotp: Peggy!! (also Sophie)

ot3: Hardison and Eliot OF Course!

notp: anyone besides those 2 rly because my girl is very unique and emotionally fragile and I can’t have anyone hurting her or abusing her trust or causing her to backslide in her evolution of learning to love people like. no. stay away. 

best quote: Everything blows up, silly!

head canon: She loves unicorns and totally believes they’re real. She can’t wait to meet one some day. She knows it’ll happen. The guys probably discuss how to dress up a horse as one to make this happen for her on her birthday at some point. She knows it’s a fake, but she loves them for trying. And she STILL believes in unicorns. 

WOW that was fun and only took 2 hours, thanks C! lol

[theremightbecupcakespodcast]

Social Distancing Self-Care: Links

Being chronically ill, I am used to being at home for days and even weeks on end. But I know most of my listeners are not. The only change for me right now is that my doctors’ appointments and physical therapy appointments are being canceled, which does also mean not writing at Starbucks or Barnes and Noble. My anxiety, of course, is heightened by everything that is going on, but the actual social distancing aspect is normal life for me. I know most of you are feeling cabin fever (which is a great movie, by the way, and about a virus–more about using horror to safely experience real-life fears in the next episode), coming right up. My love goes out to you guys. As I wrote on the Facebook page, in the Facebook group, and in the Goodreads group:

I have such empathy and love for all of you. Being forced to stay home and act like the world might make you sick…I know how scary and uncomfortable it is. Please take a moment and sit in empathy, as you struggle with your new reality of social distancing. This is how I have been living for the last six years. Not as strictly. But still the same. Some weeks I only go out of the house for my therapy appointment and a coffee afterwards. Know that when I say this, I am remembering my first days and weeks home from work, and the first days and weeks after each new diagnosis, and how very difficult they were. I am so sorry; I don’t want anyone else to feel this way. I promise the cabin fever goes away. Take very good care of yourself and each other, see this as an opportunity. That’s the lesson it has taken me years to learn.

So I am working on the above-mentioned episode, and other future episodes, and also working on intense self-care. This self-care includes distracting myself with creativity and fascinating media I have been meaning to consume. I thought I’d share some of that media with you, in order to inspire and encourage you. Share some of your own in the comments, or wherever you post your own thoughts. Feel free to promote those links in the comments as well for my listeners.

Letterboxd: Carol Kane’s movies

A horror movie I’ve never heard of! And it looks terrifying. The Mafu Cage (1978), directed by Karen Arthur. It stars Carol Kane and Lee Grant (The Omen), and I can’t wait to watch it. It looks like true 1970’s horror grittiness mixed with the likes of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane and The Bad Seed: psychological horror movies where it really comes down to the interpersonal relationship between two people who may not be sane. And a la Clive Barker’s Lord of Illusions, horror of horrors, there’s a simian involved. Those Illusions scenes, short as they are, nearly do me in.

A terrifying love story.

Two strange sisters live in a crumbling mansion, where they keep a pet ape, which belonged to their late father, locked in a cage. While one of the sisters seems to be keeping her head on straight, as it were, the other appears to be sinking further and further into barbarism and insanity.

For lighter fare, and a good laugh, here’s a horror spoof I found: Pandemonium (1982):

Tom Smothers (of the Smothers Brothers) stars as the brave mountie, who along with his trusty horse and bitter deputy Paul Reubens (Pee Wee Herman!) must track down a killer who is stalking coeds at a nearby cheerleader camp.

Also stars Carol Kane, Edie McClurg (Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Carrie), Judge Reinhold (Fast Times at Ridgemont High), Phil Hartman (Kiki’s Delivery’s Service, How I Got Into College), Eileen Brennan (Clue), Donald O’Connor (Singing in the Rain), and Tab Hunter (Damn Yankees, Grease 2). I am definitely going to seek this out, and will report back. I’m not normally a fan of horror comedy, but this looks so cute and funny. And Carol Kane! Letterboxd, Amazon (not currently available, but you can add it to your watchlist to let Amazon know you want to watch it). Just knowing this exists makes me feel better.

A spoof of camp horror movies with Canadian mounties thrown in. Yes.

Then there’s Trees Lounge: Steve Buscemi, Carol Kane, Chloe Sevigny, Samuel L. Jackson, Debi Mazar, Io Tillet Wright. Directed by Steve Buscemi. What the what. How did this get past me?!

Tommy has lost his job, his love and his life. He lives in a small apartment above the Trees Lounge, a bar which he frequents along with a few other regulars without lives. He gets a job driving an ice cream truck and ends up getting involved with the seventeen-year-old niece of his ex-girlfriend. This gets him into serious trouble with her father.

One of my Letterboxd friends called this “Cheers without the happy”. I cannot wait to see this./> Letterboxd, Amazon

These are the movies written by my friend Eric Garcia–I met Eric at Yale Summer School 1989, between our junior and senior years of high school–he was taking Drama, I was taking Psychology, and Gender and Political Science; we initially bonded over our similar sense of humors and Goodbye Yellow Brick Road (oh oh whoa whoa whoa whoa): Letterboxd:

Matchstick Men (2003): Nicholas Cage, Sam Rockwell, Jenny O’Hara:

A phobic con artist and his protege are on the verge of pulling off a lucrative swindle when the con artist’s teenage daughter arrives unexpectedly.

(the novel: Matchstick Men: A Novel About Grifters with Issues)

Repo Men (2010): Jude Law, Forest Whitaker:

In the future, medical technology has advanced to the point where people can buy artificial organs to extend their lives. But if they default on payments, an organization known as the Union sends agents to repossess the organs.

(the novel)

Strange But True (2019): Greg Kinnear, Blythe Danner:

A woman surprises the family of her deceased boyfriend by telling them she’s pregnant with his child.

Yes, “Matchstick Men”, if you are my age, that should induce a half-remembered earmworm…

…inspired by the Camper Van Beethoven song, since we’re entertaining ourselves here. And guess what, o happy of happies? Ozzy Ozbourne covered it, with Type O Negative. Have fun!

As always, to follow what I am watching, here’s my Letterboxd diary. Feel free to follow me on there, and I will follow you back.

As for books…I just finished Ronan Farrow’s Catch and Kill: Lies, Spies, and a Conspiracy to Protect Predators. I will never give NBC any of my time nor money again. Also, excuse some brief vulgarity and anger, which is rare for me: fuck Matt Lauer, fuck Lester Holt for being an enabler and minimizer for Matt Lauer, fuck the legal team and highest management at NBC and MSNBC, and fuck Harvey Weinstein and everyone that helped, enabled and ignored him. I say all this as an aghast survivor and an aghast human. About Matt Lauer: that softpedal they gave us, with Savannah Guthrie crying that morning of his firing, reading a statement about “harassment” and “inappropriate work environment”, it was farthest from the truth. Matt Lauer is a violent rapist, and know that going into reading this book. It’s explicit, and much more that you will ever expect. Also, Weinstein is much, much worse than you even knew.

In better news, I posted about this book and how it helped me, and Rose McGowan posted a comment of solidarity on my Instagram post. I cried, and I cry every time I think about it, tears of happiness and healing.

So, while we’re at it: Letterboxd: Rose McGowan’s movies

Rose McGowan: Instagram

Rose McGowan Arts: Instagram: her photography and videography art

Her book Brave is next on my list. According to Letterboxd, there’s an accompanying documentary in the works, about which I am very excited.

If you are into true crime, and i know many of you are, here’s the list of recent 5-stars I finished, including those by my talented friend Caitlin Rother:

Lost Girls * Caitlin Rother

I’ll Take Care of You * Caitlin Rother

My Daddy Is a Hero: How Chris Watts Went From Family Man to Family Killer * Lena Derhally (deep dive into this case by a therapist–the whole second half of the book is a thoughtful, intellectual examination of what might be wrong with Chris Watts)

Scarred: The True Story of How I escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life * Sarah Edmondson with Kristine Gasbarre (narrated by Sarah, and the audiobook was directed by Kate Winslet)

The Five: The Untold Lives of the Women Killed by Jack the Ripper * Hallie Rubenhold (more history than true crime, incredibly moving and marvelous detective work)

My long-suffering library hold for Madeline Miller‘s Circe finally came through, and I am beyond excited. I loved her gorgeous Song of Achilles so very much. It was so luscious in its imagery and relationship, and its retelling of myth.

I am also reading, on my Kindle, His Garden, Conversations with a Serial Killer, by Anne K. Howard, about William Devin Howell. I’m listening to The Wild Heart of Stevie Nicks written and narrated by Rob Sheffield, the author of the thought-full and moving journal of essays Love Is a Mix Tape: Life and Loss, One Song At a Time. It’s only two hours long but it’s taking me forever because I keep having to pause it to listen to her music.

I’m also knitting a blanket for Wil Wheaton. It all came about from an Instagram conversation about coziness and Muppets last year. There’s been a reboot of this blanket; I won’t bore you with the details and carnage…suffice it to say I won’t be using chenille yarn ever again. I’ll follow up here and on Instagram with new photos. The concept is a warm Muppet hug, and the base pattern is the Elm Avenue Throw Blanket by Lauren Scungio. (Feel free to follow me at Ravelry, my user name is CarlaYarn.)

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Rebooting @itswilwheaton’s Muppet hug blanket. Why? It’s a long story involving many struggles, ending with the strong resolution that I will never knit with chenille again. Stitches kept gapping and stretching; it was a crime scene. Anyway! Revamped, and the end result is going to be much more joyous and colorful, and durable. I chose colors of @knitpicks Brava that corresponded to 19079’s old-school Muppets, including overlooked intrepid reported Prairie Dawn. The Muppets are Big Bird, Bert, Ernie, Cookie, Prairie, Kermit and Herry. The original yarn retained from the original plan is the fuzzy one—the Caron Latte Cakes—it adds the furry aspect as a carry-along. The pattern is the same: the Elm Avenue Throw Blanket by #laurenscungio and #loopsandthreads. I’ve making it on larger needles than called-for for extra squish. Wil, I hope this brings you and @annewheaton much coziness and comfort. Now that I have worked out the frustration (and my health is cooperating), this blanket should be “Movin’ Right Along”. If anyone wants to follow along or check it out. I made the project public on Ravelry at https://ravel.me/CarlaYarn/eatb. #knitpicks #knitpicksbrava #caronyarn #caronlattecakes #muppets #knitting #wip #ravelry #sesamestreet #prairiedawn #bertandernie #cookiemonster #bigbird #herrymonster #knittersofinstagram #knittersofravelry #knitstagram #knitting_is_love #knitlove

A post shared by Carla Hufstedler (@carlahaunted) on Mar 18, 2020 at 9:14am PDT

I shall return with, of course, the aforementioned podcast episode, and more links, more suggestions, and more photos, especially photos of the knitting. I hope this long collection has helped–I spent all afternoon aggregating it. As always, any of the books mentioned can be collected for free with a trial membership from Audible, which helps me out, through this link: http://audibletrial.com/mightbecupcakes. As well, using any of the links in this or any post on the site helps me out. Our family budget is on lockdown. You know I still do not receive disability, and now my husband cannot go out to work. So your clicks and purchases really help, thank you so much. I will also be uploading more scripts to the show’s Patreon, and updating the Patreon levels. Please consider joining, and thank you. If you are not a fan of Patreon, you can also leave me a tip at Flattr. Episode 59 is on its way. I love you, and I hope you find something in this post fun.

To leave this on the most possible fun note, puppies must be involved, right? Well, my parents have three dogs (to my two), and the youngest, still a puppy, is Olivia Benson, and she is a very rare full hermaphrodite. She is cute as as a button as well as fascinating (her vet is going to publish a paper on her). We (meaning me, prompted by my parents via text message as they send over pictures as well) have been chronicling her journey on Instagram at @oliviathespecialpug. Give her a follow. She’s cute and sassy and ridiculously smart. Her older brothers Spencer Reid the pug and Preston the long-haired dachshund show up occasionally as well, and they’re all just stinkin’ adorable. I’ll leave you with her most recent shots. This first one was from Sunday, I was watching 48 Meters Down: Unchanged (I know, I know, here’s my review), and she was falling asleep with her arm on my shoulder, like a human, then there were birdies! She pointed at the tv then looked at me with great confusion then pointed again. The next one was from her spaying + neutering–yes, she had to have both, in a compound, complicated surgery, and she is stoned out of her gourd. I laugh every time I look at these. To me, she looks like a furry toad. I hope they make you laugh, too.

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I heard birdies in @carlahaunted’s horror movie and pointed. #pugstagram #puglife #puglifechoseme #hermaphrodite #olivia #oliviabenson #detoliviabenson #svu #lawandordersvu #oliviathepug #oliviabensonthepug #oliviathehermaphroditepug #puppiesofinstagram #pugsofinstagram #pugpuppies #pugpuppiesofinstagram #pugs #pugchronicles #flatnosesociety

A post shared by

Olivia Benson Pettigrew (@oliviathespecialpug) on Mar 15, 2020 at 7:54am PDT

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Teething pug = sleepy pug. #pugstagram #puglife #puglifechoseme #hermaphrodite #olivia #oliviabenson #detoliviabenson #svu #lawandordersvu #oliviathepug #oliviabensonthepug #oliviathehermaphroditepug #puppiesofinstagram #pugsofinstagram #pugpuppies #pugpuppiesofinstagram #pugs #pugchronicles #flatnosesociety

A post shared by

Olivia Benson Pettigrew (@oliviathespecialpug) on Mar 15, 2020 at 7:40am PDT

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I am recovering from my complicated neutering/spaying surgery nicely, but my first experience with pain meds has me very confused and doing a really good Baby Yoda impression. @carlahaunted was dogsitting me, and I kept standing up stiff legged suddenly, like I had forgotten something (Carla said it was like I had remembered I had locked my keys in my car) and then standing up on my back legs like a meerkat. I finally slept with a good, juicy pain meds + pug flatnose snore. I figured out how to untie my stuffed cone of shame. I am one clever puppy, even on pain medication. My big brothers are worried about me, but being very gentle and very well behaved. I can’t wait to play with them again. #Pugstagram #puglife #puglifechoseme #hermaphrodite #olivia #oliviabenson #detoliviabenson #svu #lawandordersvu #oliviathepug #oliviabensonthepug #oliviathehermaphroditepug #puppiesofinstagram #pugsofinstagram #pugpuppies #pugpuppiesofinstagram #pugs #pugchronicles #flatnosesociety

#babyyoda #babyyodapug #coneofshame

A post shared by

Olivia Benson Pettigrew (@oliviathespecialpug) on Jan 23, 2020 at 10:27pm PST

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