#in which case I'll *gladly* go into detail

[xerith-42]

I just realized the reason I don't write angst around my actual favorite Shadow Knight is because he doesn't angst

According to my writing Vincent is guilty of murder, assault, vandalism, armed robbery, and cannibalism, but bro is just chill about all that.

Like yeah he did that shit what about it?

...

Can't really write compelling angst when that's his additude

[iztea]

dy have any tips to make your art look less lifeless? I stare at my rendered digital art and everytime without fail i start to rot from the lack of soul in it

ok first of all, I think you might be judging your art too harshly. The only quite literal soulless art is AI art so as long as you create something, there's soul in it. But I understand what you mean. Honestly, I'm not sure if I'm best suited to answer this since it's something I struggle with myself, but since you asked me, here are my two cents on the matter

A lifeless look in your art may come from two places: a lack of skills or a lack of message/delivery

Skill-wise, there's a looot you can do and improve on : gesture, dynamic poses, more expressive faces, better color language, strategic line expression, shape language, using color theory to better express a certain mood of a piece etc.

i could go into detail for each point but it would take too long so I'll leave it up to you to google and research things on your own ( or you can shoot me another ask if you want me to yap about a certain technical approach and I'll gladly do so)

but honestly, these are just skills and tools that you master in time. A first step is to at least acknowledge their existence. I want to talk more about the second aspect of this issue: intention. The intention behind your art is more valuable than you think. Art can feel soulless if it doesn't send any message, if it's generic, if there's no emotion behind it or if there's nothing to be interpreted. I'm not saying all art should be super deep or profound to hold value of course, but i often feel like this is a rather neglected part when discussing art. We sometimes get so tied up in the technical aspects like rendering or anatomy but the truth is, a general audience (aka the people who will see your art) doesn't give a crap about the technicalities. They judge something at face value and the first thing they look for is the /message/. What is this painting about? Who or what did you draw? The second thing they will look for is connection. When they can relate to the emotion conveyed or the subject matter, the experience becomes more rewarding and engaging. The same applies to the artist. Creating something meaningful and personal often leads to a greater sense of accomplishment. Honestly, skill comes second.

Case in point: why does hyperrealistic art get shit on? It's very impressive technique-wise, yes, you can't deny the artist isn't skilled, but does it express something? Nope, they do the job of a printer which again,. it is impressive but not from an ~artistic pov, just from a skill pov. On the flip side, why do poorly drawn sob stories get so much attention and praise? Because the art triggered a certain emotion (that has overwritten an already untrained eye) and emotions are extremely powerful for humans as we all very well know and it basically makes them ignore or neglect the execution

So, my piece of advice is to draw something that has personal meaning /to you/, that ignites a certain feeling you can't shake ( it doesn't have to be something #deep or sad, laughter and joy are equally valuable so keep that in mind), a certain situation or scenario and I can guarantee your art won't feel as lifeless to you as before. To better express this idea of yours that you now possess, you can now think about the technical side of how you'd express it. For example:

~deliberately messy brushstrokes and textures -> create chaos.

~maybe you're feeling something lovely dovey and soft -> warm colors to express that + brushes with lost edges

~maybe you want to tell a story in a comic format -> focus on calligraphy; shaky lineart gives off the impression of vulnerability; leave whitespaces etc

~something funny? -> goofy facial expressions or lowkey downgrading the quality usually makes something funnier

~Colors ! colors ! colors !!! pretty self-explanatory blues and grays for depression pinks and rainbows for the happy ( or NOT if you're feeling adventurous winkwink)

BONUS TIP: hiding/blocking out/blurring the face of your subject makes the painting feel more immersive. The viewer can relate to the person you're drawing ( "oh he's just like me fr")

There are artists who are insanely skilled but make kinda "boring" art and then there are artists with cool ideas but with maybe an underwhelming execution.

Ultimately, it's a combination of BOTH awesome skills and intentions. Those are my favourite artists. When i find someone who draws something that makes me stare and wonder how tf they drew that while also appreciating how cool the concept is I knoww I hit jackpot. And if they draw fanart of my fave?? bonus points

okkkkkkkkk i yapped for too long sorttyyyyy hope it helped maybe idk

!!!!DISCLAIMER!!!! this is all my personal interpretation and how i view things I'm self taught I've never been to art school or taken any art classes so i might be completely wrong !! take everything with a grain of salt !!

[honeybewrites]

Writerly Questionnaire

Thank you @paeliae-occasionally for the tag, @harmonic-melodii for the tag, @the-golden-comet for the tag, @sableglass for the tag, @the-letterbox-archives for the tag,

@ominous-feychild for the tag and @willtheweaver for the tag!! Also thanks to @davycoquette for creating the game!!

About You

When did you start writing?

Hmm, that shouldn't be a hard question and yet here we are. Honestly, I don't know. I have a really shitty memory, especially when it comes to my childhood. I think I might have been around ten when I first started?

Are the genres/themes you enjoy reading different from the ones you write?

No, I definitely like writing the same stuff I read. Fantasy and sci-fi is my jam! Throw in some massive world building, some angst and whump and you've got me hooked.

Is there an author (or just a fellow writer!) you want to emulate, or one to whom you’re often compared?

I definitely haven't been compared to anyone. I would like to emulate Brandon Sanderson in the sense of his massive world building and phenomenal magic systems.

Can you tell me a little about your writing space(s)? (Room, coffee shop, desk, etc.)

I don't really have a set space. I often write on the living room couch because it's the most comfortable. I do have a desk that I will occasionally write at, but it's pretty uncomfortable after a short while, and I mostly use it for other work instead.

What’s your most effective way to muster up some muse?

The car or the bathroom. I know it's sounds super strange, but driving without any music, or better yet riding with it, often gets my brain thinking. And wether I'm showering or just washing my face, a lot of my best ideas come to me in the bathroom.

Did the place(s) you grew up in influence the people and places you write about?

I really don't know, but I doubt it. Like I said, my memory is shitty. We had moved about five or six times by the time I graduated high school. It was all in the same city at least, but different parts of it. As for people, I was a hermit. I didn't have any friends or hardly ever talk to people my age.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing, and if so, do they surprise you at all?

Does whump count? On a more serious note, I haven't done what I call a deep edit in years. I think, just off the top of my head, trauma and abuse are pretty reoccurring, along with internal emotional issues like trust.

Your Characters

Would you please tell me about your current favorite character? (Current WIP, past WIP, never used, etc.)

That's a tough one! I love my babies! I think my current favorite would be 703. She's been around the longest and honestly, she'd helped me through some bad times and I'm not sure I would be here without her.

Which of your characters do you think you’d be friends with in real life?

As much as I love her, 703 and I would not get along. She's a little too trigger happy and I'm a little too non confrontational. I think Rage and I would hit it off pretty well though. Maybe Fres too if I could break through their barriers.

Which of your characters would you dislike the most if you met them?

I have said this before and I'll say it again, Master Gerd. That man is a straight up bastard and I would gladly choke the life out of him if ever given the chance. He just makes me so angry.

Tell me about the process of coming up with of one, all, or any of your characters.

It's pretty different for each one. Sometimes they start with a name, other times they don't. It is pretty consistent that I just start writing them into the story before coming up with all the details. If the character sticks around and starts to have a more predominant role, that's generally when I'll go into detail about their backstory and they get their own file in my doc. But this isn't always the case. Sometimes, I just already know all this information from the start and I can write it all down. 703 was like that. Sometimes things come up along the way slowly. But for the most part, I just start writing and everything else works out fine.

Do you notice any recurring themes/traits among your characters?

Trauma!! Gotta have the dark backstory haha! Most of my OCs have very unhappy and traumatic childhoods/young adult lives 😈. Protectiveness also comes up quite a lot along with being physically strong. I mean, most of my OCs are in a "cult" of some kind that generally goes around fighting things... okay maybe cult is a theme too now that I'm thinking about it. I've got the Mors (bad cult) Oraniz (morally gray cult) Ryuk's pack (wholesome cult) and mafia like organizations in Rune Storm (also bad/morally gray cults)... yeah I think that might be a theme.

How do you picture them? (As real people you imagined, as models/actors who exist in real life, as imaginary artwork, as artwork you made or commissioned, anime style, etc.)

Animation style. I've always wanted, especially when I was younger and life hadn't taught me anything yet, to have my work turned into an animated series. Even now, that little dream, that I realize is very unlikely, stays the same. I think you can do a lot more with animation than you can live action, and it's always how I've imagined my OCs. Albeit it is a little more "realistic" animation, like Dreamworks, Disney, those kinds of things.

Your Writing

What’s your reason for writing?

If I don't write down my OCs and world, I'm pretty sure I'll go mad. I love sharing my writing, but I write for myself first and foremost. And writing has gotten me through a lot of really hard times in my life. It's something I can always turn to and it helps me express and process things. I can't imagine my life without it. It's just a part of me.

Is there a specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating coming from your readers?

Honestly, just saying you enjoyed it is more than enough. I never thought I'd have anyone that would be interested in my writing enough to leave comments on it. Every time I get one on anything I post, it always makes me smile.

How do you want to be thought of by those who read your work? (For example: as a literary genius, or as a writer who “gets” the human condition; as a talented worldbuilder, as a role model, etc.)

I think I’d like to be seen as just a really good world builder and nice writer in general. I don’t really have any expectations 😂

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

Um world building maybe? I’m not really sure I’ve got any greatest strengths deal when it comes to writing. I don’t think I’m horrible, but I’m certainly not great or anything.

What have you been frequently told your greatest writing strength is by others?

Uh, no. This is the only place I’ve ever talked about my writing. Don’t exactly have any irl to discuss it with or anything I trust to read it. That would get me in a less than ideal situation pretty fast.

How do you feel about your own writing? (Answer in whatever way you interpret this question.)

I think it could use a lot of work if I ever want to publish it. I definitely enjoy doing it, but I don’t think it’s all that great.

If you were the last person on earth and knew your writing would never be read by another human, would you still write?

Yes. Honestly, I never thought anyone would be interested in my writing anyway. Plus, if I’m the last human, I need some form of entertainment haha

When you write, are you influenced by what others might enjoy reading, or do you write purely what you enjoy? If it’s a mix of the two, which holds the most influence?

I’d like to say it’s pretty much for my enjoyment, but I’m sure there’s some influence of what other people might like too. I’m a chronic people pleaser unfortunately

Tagging @yourpenpaldee @fractured-shield @anaisbebe @aalinaaaaaa @nczaversnick

@kaylinalexanderbooks @wyked-ao3 @diabolical-blue and anyone else who wants to hop on!! Seriously, everyone should do this tag game, it's super fun and insightful!

[hilkaro]

Quite an ordinary graphic analysis, really.

Gato posted a new artwork of Fox, and since I'm quite normal when it comes to this guy, I'll do a little analysis and share my own assumptions about the overall appearance (as I get the impression that what is generally available is only a fragment of the whole; I don't know what the patrons saw, and if there's more, I envy them).

I'll start by saying that the artwork is very dark; I had to lighten it to see the details better.

I assume Fox is lying in his studio, where he streams. He's wearing his costume and mask. Besides him, you can also see a choking collar with protruding spikes and a gag with a ring. Both of these items are well-known to us, as they were props he used during a certain scene... I wonder if there's a tentacle somewhere outside the frame.

As for Ren himself, it seems like he's lying on his back, probably beneath me, you, or anyone else... it doesn't matter, and he's looking up. His eyes glow in the darkness, indicating that, unlike me/you, he can see everything perfectly. His ears are lowered. I don't know about foxes, but I have a cat, and he flattens his ears when he's nervous, dominated, or wants to make more room for my hand when I pet him on the head. In this case, I assume it's not about petting or anger—Fox's eyebrows are slightly raised, not furrowed. So, I assume that in this situation, the beastkin is submitting to me/you as the dominant person, in control of the situation.

One of his hands is visible, holding a knife with a very thin blade. It seems to be a different knife than the one he used in the game. The internet claims that this type of blade is good for... filleting. Hmmm. The sharp edge is directed towards me/you, but I don't think it's a real threat or defense on his part. Rather, it's a reminder that despite the situation, Fox remains vigilant and ready.

I would like to go back to his eyes, which seem to be heavily swollen, as if he had a lot of loose skin on the lower eyelid. I understand that this may be due to perspective and how the skin, especially loose skin, works when lying down, but in my opinion, it ages him significantly. For comparison:

Perhaps it's because of the mask, which tightly encases his face, the lack of adequate sleep or hydration, or overworking; I don't know. The fact is, the lower eyelid looks swollen.

That's all that is visible. Now, what is not visible. I'm almost sure that his other hand is raised and lies next to him with the palm facing up, in a gesture of submission and helplessness (in contrast to the other hand). I hope this side is the "nicer" one (similar to other pillows), and here we only have, for example, an unbuttoned pants button. On this "spicy" side, I would like to see more of his body (and fur), as it was in the game when he visited the player between shows. I feel that this Ren has more confidence and has accepted his body enough not to be ashamed to show it. It would be a shame if Fox decided to show only his penis, at least for me. And I hope that if the other side exists or will exist in the future, it will be bright and in color, as if it took place in a cell in the bunker.

That's all that came to my mind. If anyone has any further thoughts, please write; I'll gladly read them. After all... normal people should support each other when it comes to Fox, heh.

Fox belongs to Gatobob. The screenshots come from the game The Price of Flesh and from Gato's Twitter.

[starmaiden777]

.....im tired

Link to the article

Makes me think that there are so many better ways to spread your message then shocking people in a public space and causing a panic... and getting yourself arrested. Of course sometimes there isnt a choice... but this isnt one of those cases.

This group needs to stop. There are so many more better ways to promote your cause.... that being said it's white activism at it's finest. But it only proves to infuriate me more rather than support these people.

This kind of activism only inspires copycats, and people looking for a thrill, or people who actually wish to cause actual harm to things within the public eye, specifically things that are well loved or spoken or documented of.

And even if these pieces are replicas put out to protect the originals... this is such a waste of passion that could be redirected in other ways. The museums have already gone to lengths to keep their collections safe... they don't need protesters using them as their focal point. I said it once and i will say it again. Im so tired of people using the shock factor to get their way.

Especially with the digital age and promoting your voice on platforms bigger than yourself. It has been proven that having a positive impact will far outpace a negative impact with charities and organizations. But no. Once again, important topics and environmental emergencies are just written down to shock and awe.

I'll say this now, of course I care about the cause. I have little care for the organizations who keep doing this however. Yeah sure they hit where the money seems to be going... but are you really going to put it down to oil and oil paints? Really? How ingenious. Note the heavy sarcasm there.

I can't help but feel that this is just the excuse private collectors look for with art. They will argue that these pieces arent as safe as they could be in private collections. Which is bullshit because while a fair amount of people do tend to take care of private collections, they will just as often face neglect and destruction.

That's aside from the fact that they would be ON PRIVATE display. Unavailable to the public. Museums are for the purpose of public enjoyment and education. Not to mention inspiration. And before you say, well I could just look the painting up on the internet, yeah you could, but have you actually gone to a museum and compared a digital photo to a physical work of art?

You don't get the detail. You don't get the understanding of just what strokes were put to canvas or wood. There is something different of the clarity, and the vibrance, and rhe depth of color that you just can't quite capture on film without some form of enhancement.

You won't quite understand the time and effort and life that was put into the mastery behind these pieces of art.

So many masters pieces have been lost throughout the annals of time, likely never to be seen again.

We are VERY fortunate to have funders support their local or favorite museums. Fortunate to have passionate people who dedicate their life's work to preserving the quality of the art and restoring it if needs be.

These are masters pieces that are rich in history and time. And now it's not enough for regular museum security to do their jobs and protect and keep the reputations of these museums. Idk if theyre getting bought off or just... whatever... Personally I would rather keep a more optimistic view of people, especially when it is likely they have this job to put food on their table and keep themselves warm. But it happens. And now security will tighten, which means regulations will tighten, which means more restrictions from a public museum, which means a restriction on entertainment and education, which when you think about it, we all know who will get hit first from that.

So yeah. I support the idea of shutting down big polluting oil rigs. And i would gladly support these orgs if they weren't already shady as hell. But like said before. White privelaged stupid activism. There are so many better ways to promote yourself. Especially in the digital age.

Im just glad that they werent permanently damaged, because there has been so much history of intentional damage and theft in the art community. And then people come in boasting how they are experts in their field and ruin a piece further. Sorry... i was one of the people who actually cared about my art history class in high school.

Feel free to add anything below. And correct me if I am wrong. But if you do, please, be kind to other people. I don't want wars waging in my comments. I doubt this will circulate much but... here's to wishful thinking.

[decayhearts]

🤝: How did they meet in the first place? What was there first impression of each other?

🗣️: Who’s the one that will ramble on about their highly specific interest while the other just sits back and nods along?

🕊️: Give just a general domestic tidbit for em (things they like about each other, routines, habits, and just overall sweet stuff)

For Andrei and Ray!!

oh, yay!!! thanks so much for the questions to which I'll gladly answer them!

🤝: How did they meet in the first place? What was there first impression of each other? so, the way they met is definitely an interesting one because it all has to do and revolve around death lol.

see, ray got herself into a fatal and tragic accident, one that caused her to die on the side of a road! andrei was given her case and had later inspected her body only to see that she was seemingly brought back to life but with a bit of an undead look to her. she hadn't remembered anything about her life, ever and andrei became of help and essentially retaught her the experience of life.

anywayyy, ray's first impression of andrei was that he seemed to distance himself from time to time and that he had a bad case of sleep! she wasn't wrong, she was also confused meeting him at first BUT got all smiles after learning a bit about him.

andrei's first impression of ray was that she seemed like a sweet young woman who was very passionate about the stuff she did and wanted to learn, she was whimsical! (he would later be glad to have her in his life) he was a bit confused as to HOW she was alive but glad he found her.

🗣️: Who’s the one that will ramble on about their highly specific interest while the other just sits back and nods along? ray, 100%! one HUGE interest of hers is that of medicine, learning about the human body and educating herself on the medical field as a whole. 24/7, she's usually rambling on about it without even realizing and perhaps some might assume that annoys andrei greatly but they'd be wrong, he cares about seeing how happy ray gets over something so specific like that + he gets to see her smile!

🕊️: Give just a general domestic tidbit for em (things they like about each other, routines, habits, and just overall sweet stuff) for ray, she likes how comfortable and open andrei can be around her. usually, he's one to only mention a few details here and there about something but never go beyond that however, it's different when he's around ray and she stays being in awe about it. for andrei, he likes how passionate she gets over the things she likes, loves how deeply she cares for the world around her and LOVES her laugh, he could listen to it for hours.

their routines together start off pretty similar. they'll wake up, get dressed, sometimes ray likes to know andrei's opinion on what she's wearing for the day because she loves the reactions she'll get out of him. then, they'll have their little breakfast meals (that andrei usually makes because he's the better cook in the house LMAOO, there's a reason for that okay 🤣) and chat about what they'll do the rest of the day.

if andrei has to go to work, ray will find herself walking their (undead) cat, sid or she'll whip up another page for her scrapbook. if it's nice enough out, she'll take a dip by the lake near her and andrei's house before coming back in time to see that andrei has made it home.

just a cute little domestic routine for the two!

(sry this was longer than it needed to be lol but these were fun to answer, thanks again!! 💜💜💜)

ship ask game.

[purgetrooperfox]

I WANTS TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR BOY DESMOND!!!! TELL ME THINGS, PLEASE!!!!💕💞💕💞💕💘💕💘💕💞💕

HELLOOOO Desmond hours real. Des my darling my fucked up little guy. he is um. he's very much not V (cont. under the cut)

grew up in Pacifica. yikes! had connections with Mr. Hands that will come back later

got roped into Maelstrom pretty young under ripperdoc/mechanic pretenses

hence all the headgear! Maelstrom initiation involves an optic nerve operation [x] that afaik usually involves taking both eyes. Des made a case for only losing one, citing ripperdoc superstition about organics vs cybernetics, which went over like a lead balloon but ultimately panned out under the assumption that he'd just struggle more for it

did more ripping than doc-ing if you catch my drift (famously medical-tortured and forced implants on whoever the bosses targeted, killed A Lot Of People on the table, human experimentation, wrote the Maelstrom handbook on all of the above) and had no qualms about it

like I cannot stress enough that he was Bad News <3

if it wasn't for turbulence in the upper ranks, he would've gladly kept at the job indefinitely. but he and Royce had ✨️issues✨️. namely that Des was fiercely loyal to Brick and company, and by that point he'd climbed the ranks to a level where his opinion carried quite a bit of weight

so even before Royce took over, he was all worried about the discourse Des was starting about him and his posse

but shit didn't hit the proverbial fan until after the power transfer. Royce took over and stuck one of his guys under Des to be trained (a la train your replacement), Des was severely unimpressed, eventually tried to jump ship

and got caught! and got his turn on the table! lost a couple limbs to his replacement while making sure to make clear that "this motherfucker is an embarrassment to everything I built here". was probably more upset at the disregard of his legacy than the fact that he was most likely going to die very slowly

reputation is soooo important to him you see. and "Eyes" was infamous

anyway. Dum Dum busted him out (gave him an adrenaline shot and unlocked the back door)

which led to a pretty pathetic trudge through the city until he passed out on the street, and eventually got scooped up

enter Misty "we can't just let him die" and Vik "god dammit if you say so"

cue a long, slow recovery process. realization that he can't do the ripperdoc or mechanic work he knows with only one organic arm and a royally shitty cybernetic. merc work to pay Vik back (thanks Mr. Hands, hello again). Vik wants to try to teach him that he can relearn how to Fix Things. do you see my vision?

important that Maelstrom thinks he's dead so Royce doesn't keep sending goons after him. also important to build a new network

tricky to build a new network when his entire face says "I'm with famously violent gang Maelstrom" innit

but he's trying! and mostly trying to behave himself! and trying to build a new arm so he can do work he enjoys again (even if it's more doc-ing than ripping now)!

all to say I think he's neat and I think Maelstrom was woefully underexplored in the game so I'll do it through an oc 😌 the smaller details are unnecessary but entertain me deeply. he has a funny little casual on again/off again with Dietlinde (yes the Totentanz bartender with minimal canon personality). he and Dum Dum were dumbass buddies. his sense of humor is drier than the desert. he is A Junkie. nothing he knows about mechanics or medicine or engineering was learned in a classroom and you couldn't pay him to learn that way, but he picks it all up well in a practical environment. his pride will be (kind of already was) his downfall. he says shit off the cuff that thoroughly disturbs civilized company without even realizing he did it

he is. my beloved

[chaotic-toby]

I just finishes making two creepypasta OCs and I'm planning on writing a story about them. Well, even though Toby isn't going to be a main character, I still want to include him bc he's my favourite and I relate to him. I'm making this post about his characterization bc I want to get it right, and I hate how some people infantilize him in fics, or write his tics.

Anyways, Toby's characterization!

Attitude!

Now, I am thinking hard about this. So, isn't it canon that Toby continues to age even after his story ends, so I wanna say he's probably around 21-22 ish. He's mature but not completely mature. He has his funny moments. Toby is a proxy who obeys Slenderman's every command. Bc of that, he tends to be serious most of the time, unless he's not actively doing something, then he lets loose and relaxes. I also like to think he can be a smartass when he needs to be. He doesn't take shit from no one. But, if someone is nice, then he'll be nice as well. Toby, when he's working and whatnot, is quiet, barely talking so he can focus, but when he's with any creepypastas he's comfortable with, he can be quite talkative. He has a soft spot for anyone who can't easily defend themselves bc when he was still living with his father, he was in the same boat.

Toby isn't exactly a prankster, but if someone asked him for help with a prank, then he'll gladly help, especially if the victim of the prank is someone he's doesn't like.

Tics!

Now, I know in recent fics, at least the few I have read, people are writing Toby's tics in a more realistic way, and I'm happy about that. As someone who has tics, I wanna explain how I'll write them. Just a disclaimer, I only have motor tics (I might possibly have chronic tic disorder) so I might not write the vocal tics good. If that's the case, anyone feel free to correct me. Anyways...

Toby's motor tics consist of his nose twitching, head jerking, his eyes looking to the left uncontrollably, which causes intense headaches (I'm projecting). His right shoulder also jerk occasionally but that isn't a very common tic that he has. Another motor tic is that his arms will randomly extend outward, hitting anything in the way (not something that I do but I have seen in a fic I read years ago).

Vocal tics includes clearing his throat, repeating something he heard (in my fic, I really want him to say, "ding dong ditch, you are a bitch" bc my oc will write that (my oc doesn't talk so he writes)), whistling (from what I've seen, is a common vocal tic), and lastly, stuttering. NOW, I'm not talking about constabtly stuttering, no. He only stutters when he's really emotional or stressed or just in a very intense situation.

Relationships!

I'm not gonna go into detail about his relationship with every creepypasta (humanoid creepypastas Ig), but I will briefly mention how close he is to a select few, just the ones that comes to mind rn.

Jeff- Toby doesn't like Jeff bc in my fic, he's kinda an asshole. Though Toby does admire his honesty and how surprisingly trusting he is? Like, if you tell Jeff something, he won't tell a soul. Also surprisingly, he can be quite helpful, which Toby admires as well.

Masky + Hoodie- They're not creepypastas, and in Marble Hornets, are shown to actively go against Slenderman, so I like to think that Toby, who obeys Slenderman, despises them. They would try to get him to see through Slenderman's brainwashing, but he refuses to listen to them (who knows, maybe one day, he will listen and finally break free from Slendy~)

BEN- I like to think of them as friends (not bc they're my two favourites) but because despite BEN's age, he can be quite mature at times? And helps Toby if Toby ever needed information about a target. They play games every now and then.

Sally- Everyone loves Sally. End of discussion.

(I was gonna do more but I don't feel like it bc it involves thinking)

With my OC!

If you're not interested in anything about my OC, feel free to skip this part but I am in love with my OC and have been dying to talk about him!

Now, how is Toby around my OC? My OC is named Noah, and he doesn't talk, like at all. He has the ability to, but refuses to ever speak bc of his speech impediment: rhotacism. When he wants to talk to someone, he writes what he has to say on a notepad. Since he's quiet and minds his business, Toby is fine around him, but there's a part of Noah that unnerves him. It feels like Noah isn't just Noah, like there's another part of him that's more... evil. As a killer himself, Toby isn't scared of Noah, far from it. Noah is probably one of the most pacifistic creepypastas in the entire mansion. He never actually kills anyone, he just somehow makes people so angry that they start attacking each other. Toby is just a bit... curious about him. But they rarely see each other since Noah is either always in his room or disappeared somewhere, and Toby is mainly in the woods. Whenever they do see each other or hang out, it's always a calm experience. It mainly involves Toby talking about something with Noah writing back his responses. Not like Noah doesn't take the lead in conversations at times. When he gets excited about something, he hastily writes it down, which makes it difficult to read, but Toby doesn't care. Honestly, at times, Noah feels like a younger brother he never had. If Noah ever needed help, Toby would probably help.

(Gah, now all I can think about is Toby being an overprotective brother figure <33 especially since Noah never had any siblings. Also, this went off the rails a bit. I just really like my OC and Toby <33)

[onwesterlywinds]

PROMPT #9: Fair

Though Astodan would rather break his fast on nails than admit it, he rather appreciated Cahir. He certainly appreciated the man far more than his master, who he had known by reputation ever since his days in the Blackram Knights. If the self-styled Saintsmaker was a necessary evil, then their right hand - useless a term though it was for one whose limbs were constructs - offered him ample reminders of why he did not simply find another contact among the Undercity's many lords.

"Is the wayward Fiel driving you up the wall as surely as she is us?" Cahir asked. No pleasantries, limited tact, straight to the share of information.

Astodan chuckled. "No, because I make a point of steering clear of the witch." It was in his case a silent but deliberate statement, and an explicit threat in its own right: he had shown Élodie enough of his hand thus far for her to fear his connections to the viceroy. "Why? What has she done?"

Cahir rolled up the sleeve of his arm to reveal oozing welts blooming upon his ruddy skin. "Stinging nettle. She paid Fiadh to cover the Saintsmaker's bedding in it."

More likely Fiadh did it for free, and had jumped at the chance. Astodan had known few young women with a greater complex for martyrdom. Cahir, for all his virtues, was one to overlook children's misbehaviors, but now that his lord had been threatened… "I'll see that the girl's dealt with." After her antics in the Sprawl, and the explosion that had killed more Ala Mhigans than Garleans, precious few would protest to his form of justice.

Cahir nodded. "And inform me of the result."

Oh, but of course the mad-eyed wretch would want to revel in every detail. "Gladly." With the unsavory business out of the way, Astodan launched into the true purpose for their visit. "It's good timing, as well. I'm going to be away for a few weeks, perhaps a moon."

"Official business?"

It was Cahir's favorite euphemism for his imperial involvements. "That's right." Something in Werlyt, with details even he was not yet privy to. "I would expect far more patrols to the northeast, and fewer along Porta Praetoria. If you or your order have any supplies to transport from Ala Ghiri, next week would be the optimal time."

Cahir would never wish him luck, nor even grant him a blessing of the sort Astodan knew him to give to true believers of the Saintsmaker's half-baked little cult. That suited him perfectly well. The man did, however, offer him another nod, this one with far more sincerity.

"And," Astodan continued, "Maoin of the quartz quarry is with child. Their twin sister, lest you recall, was a Heart-Seer whom the Garleans took before her tenth nameday."

Cahir stared at him in something resembling disbelief, perhaps wondering if this glut of information was some sort of a trap. After a moment of that unexpected but not fully uncomfortable silence, he muttered, "My thanks."

"Don't mention it." Astodan turned his back gladly, and made off down the Skallic tunnel in the direction from which he had come. "Best of luck handling your nettle. I'll let you know what becomes of Fiel's."

[une-nuit-pour-se-souvenir]

Thoughts on Frontiers

(This contains spoilers)

I finally got some time to see to it properly.

The open world platform is great and the roaming free mechanics is also great. There's an overfocus on the open world in detriment of the cyber levels, but even if I prefer the latter to the former on a Sonic game, it works regardless. It takes a lot for me to ignore something I wouldn't like in principle, so I must say that here they got it right. However, it gets somewhat tiresome after awhile.

The open world is bland looking. There are a few places here and there where it's beautiful, but it's in a realistic kind of way. It isn't bad but I think Unleashed's colourful ways goes much better with the Sonic series. In a bizarre way, Frontiers reminds me of 06, although that one was Windows XP Wallpaper bland AND empty. Fortunately, the cyber levels are zanny enough to palate cleanse. The fact that it's so bland also makes me tune out, which mean I'll often get lost, map or no map.

The cyber levels are solid. Some of them are short, but since there are 30 of them, it's not like it matters. Sonic controls well, though I feel like he's lacking weight (recurrent issue). The platforming feels good, even with the traditional glitchings here and there. The skills to fight enemies are decent, although I have no interest in it. Some that play fighting games say it's good, so I'll take their word for it.

I don't mind the recycling of levels layouts. IMO, they are different enough in looks and playability to feel fresh, yet the nostalgia when the familiarity clicks is great. There are 30 of them too, so plenty to be entertained about, even if one or another would potentially rub the wrong way (which isn't the case for me).

(It's also promising that they're testing SA/SA2 levels, it may indicate they're going to redo those games in this engine, and they would do well both because they are old enough that a remake would feel fresh but also because those two are still fan favourites.)

I don't mind the recycling of level assets. It's lazy of course, we cannot complain about Green Hill, but we've seen Chemical Plant and Sky Sanctuary enough in the past few years. Regardless, it doesn't bother me that much and if that was the price for the rest of the game to be successfull, then I'll accept it gladly. There is a slight annoyance sometimes, a sort of "this one again" but it passes quickly. Sonic is very dear to me and the recycled level assets are also dear to me, even if it's repetitive. I end not minding.

I do mind the ranking system, but that's not new. I've had issues with most of them. The only one I truly liked was SA2. That cringe "that was cool" felt earned. Getting an S at first try just by buldozing through a level DOES NOT feel earned. Regardless. ranks aren't something I really care about either. I just wonder what is the point. So much care and work went into making these levels, but the player gets rewarded the most by ignoring it. If the score is linked to time attack, then it should be for studying the level at such detail that the shortest way becomes clear.

The story is mixed for me. On one hand, I've always enjoyed the "ancient technology" story that SEGA really loves telling, most of my favourite games through the... decades (*shock*) have had that as a storyline. On the other hand, I know that such a thing is very problematic in real life and it's not the greatest moment to be pandering to it right now (the crazies are out of control).

I did enjoy the story though. The Chaos Emeralds being alien is something that is very old, from the japanese lore of the 90s. So it was very cool seeing it show up again. The two alien races fighting for it was... strange. It fits with the story they're trying to tell and there's nothing inheritently bad with it, but it felt strange to me. Also, it's clear the story is incomplete, to be continued at a later game, but even within what was in this game things were explained awkwardly and not very well at points.

The aestetics are mixed as well. Like I said earlier, the open world is bland and the ancient ruins also feel sort of bland even if they have very interesting shapes. I was overall irked by the EVA throwbacks. While I love NGE, I found Rebuild to be mediocre, which I oconsider to be a trainwreck written by a man that cannot accept his past and tries to rewrite it. I understand the majority liked Rebuild though, so I also understand that this was clever. Props for using 1 of 2 of EVA's best girls for an expy though.

I enjoyed Sage much like I enjoyed Chip too, even though they're entirely different characters. I think she's a bit too serious for the Sonic universe though, in that the super "annoying" Chip fit better. Perhaps they should have cranked Eggman more, so the contrast would make up for it. I would't know though, I'm not a writer. I do feel like Sage has a lot of potential for future plots even in minor ways. Eggamn being fond of his smartest creation gives him someone to bounce off of when he's on his own. In parallel, Sage is an AI that has gained some self-awareness, which means she can be unpredictable and save / ruin Eggman's plans on a "whim".

Overall, the characters felt a bit too serious though. The dialogue was better written, there was a lot of "makes sense" moments. However, Amy, Knuckles, and Tails felt a bit too bland. Amy's crush was very subdued (in contrast, Sonic's wasn't, at least for the norm, which is nice to see) and her good heart focus, while appropriate didn't feel like explored enough. Knuckles had his moments when antagonising Sonic but felt disconnected from a plot that is close to him and his origins. Tails has been suffering for well over a decade, he should behave like I child but he's systhematically info-dumping technobabble instead (he does more technobabble than Eggman, which is outrageous). I did like Sonic a lot though.

So, I give it a solid 8, placing it along Generations. Unleashed and the SAs still reign supreme to me, but Frontiers is a good game. The issues that exist... SEGA / Sonic has always been a bit rough around the edges anyway (a Sonic game without questionable content isn't a Sonic game) and the issues I have with it are easily ignored (I'll replay for Cyber Levels anyway). This is worth mentioning as I'm notably picky, so if I tend to give it a pass regardless of any issues, that means that the game is a good result.

What truly makes me happy about Frontiers isn't about me though, but the success Frontiers has achieved with others. While I may have issues with the game because I've been a fan for so long I've developed cult-like tendencies, I'm content SEGA / Sonic Team has landed a solid hit, which is hopeful for the future. Success is what Sonic deserves and what it should have.

[lestappenficssearch]

Hiii 🌞

You may have seen the post I made on my main acc (@matchtaco), maybe the name and the username already indicate what this account will be about, this idea occurred to me during the early morning added to the fact that this season ends on Sunday and the World Cup begins (so I'm going to need moments to relax from the 26 men who are going to represent my country and what better than posting things related to lestappen?)

There are over 1300 "Charles Leclerc/Max Verstappen" fics at the time of writing this on AO3, so that's a lot, which not only means we're getting close to third and second place (and within a few years the first) of the ship with the most stories in f1 but also as a consequence many stories are lost among the constant increase of fics, and their search becomes very difficult when you only remember what the story was about or some characteristic detail, or also because of the number of fics, it may be that you want to read something specific with Max and Charles as the main couple and you simply want recommendations…

At that moment I come in, basically you ask me what you need my help with and I'll take care of looking for you and/or recommending you the lestappen fics you want, and if I can't find it or it's not the one you were looking for, ask me again if it's still there available, i'll find it lol.

If you are looking for a fic that you do not remember its name or its labels or its summary, you can request it in the link that says "ask" describing what you remember, for example: an ABO one shot where Charles and Max are divorced.

If, on the other hand, you want me to recommend a specific story, like the one above, in "ask" to write me what kind of fic you are looking for and I recommend up to 3, if possible (or tell me how many you want), for example: a forbidden love fic with sex for favors.

And finally, if you are an author and you allow me to download your story in case one day you delete it so that people who liked it can continue reading it, let me know also through "ask" or through my main page/account, I want to clarify that I will only download the fics of people who allow me, I will not do anything without the express consent of the authors (with the fics of anonymous authors I still have the doubt of what to do), as if you first allow me and then you don't want it anymore, I'll delete it and send you screenshots if you need to review it.

In these days I will upload a card explaining everything better (if I don't get to upload it today, I will upload it before Tuesday since my country plays that day and I will only be able to think about it haha) with the ways to request, the characteristics, etc.

That would be all, I really hope to be of the greatest possible help, if you need any kind of thing that I have mentioned in the previous paragraphs just let me know and I will gladly do it.

[mxsinizter]

would you feel comfortable explaining your own experience of aegosexuality?

cogs are turning in my head thanks to your ifrit/mountain fic because i actually used to identify as autochoris/aego but kind of.. scrapped the possibility once i discovered that i had a sex drive? because in my head ace people couldn't have sex drives (which, i know now, is entirely not the case) my point is; the way you wrote mountain and his shame afterwards, (as well as the definition of aegosexual on the sexuality wiki) resonates with me quite a bit. but i'm struggling to pinpoint if it's an asexuality thing or maybe something else, and i was hoping that an insight into someone's personal thoughts or experiences might help?

if you're not comfortable sharing, that's completely fine too, of course!!! i know how personal some of this stuff can get! and i'm so sorry for this paragraph of an ask, haha :')

HII! YES OF COURSEE! I'll gladly share if it can help :] no need to apologize

(This is a very long response oops, I hope I answered your questions? I am open to answering any more tho <3)

First off, yea, sex drive doesn't define it. I experience times of a very high libido myself, so that shouldn't be reason to scrap ace identities! Especially with autochoris/aego, many of us deal with a sex drive that is not on the low side. The shame part, especially for me can be tied to that! Listening to urges and 'fulfilling' them don't always end... happily for me. It brings a discomfort when it hits me that yea, my arousal made me do that, made me think that, and made me cross that boundary that kept me disconnected from it, something I found fun in theory. (you mentioned 'or something else'... for me that something else is occasionally my own insecurity or bottom dysphoria, so I get that, but I personally am sure that many of the times it mainly stems from being aego.)

With the way I wrote Mountain and that shame.. was a sort of build up of 'oh, would you look at that, my dick finds this very arousing' to 'okay, I find this very arousing' and going into a mental state where the situation is acceptable and something he wants to gain pleasure from. Then with the parts where his imagination wants to run wild, its like him wanting to gain control of what's going on and have fun with it and sort of blind himself from the fact that he was openly jerking off to it lol. (That's why I gave little details of what he was doing there and focused on the show Ifrit was putting on instead and his pov! Bc that's what Mount was fully focused on too!) So then we see that build up of "shame" have him like 'ew, I did that, my body did that and I enjoyed it'. It felt... too real? It's a sort of repulsion caused by the fact that the action is not just in your head/distant from you anymore (I really experience that). That discomfort sometimes doesn't even let you enjoy the afterglow and it sucks. So that comfort Ifrit wants to provide and telling him that he did well and that it was okay, is massive to him. Like, its okay for you to feel this for yourself and let your physical body experience it as well.

(I am for sure making a post about Ifrit's choices now, cause I think those are important to understand how intune he was with Mountain's needs and boundaries.)

But not all aegos feel this so strongly, I happen to and so I wanted to hint at it in the fic. (like even when writing fics, I'll write them, look them over once or twice for basic mistakes, then just post them bc I can't get myself to reread something like that that I created... so my first drafts are basically my final drafts LMAOO. I have a fic idea I haven't been able to write cause I think it'd take too much out of me to do it myself, but I could easily read someone else's work of something just as filthy because it isn't coming from me y'know? I don't have to think about all the mechanics of what is being done.)

I think it really helps to differentiate everything physical and everything mental, understanding what triggers or turns off your arousal, and how you experience attraction. Like you might know already when it comes to fantasizing, many aegos will experience it from the third person view and not include themselves. If they do, it's probably more of a persona of their creation that may have some resemblance, but is separate enough to not actually be them? (I am occasionally guilty of this lol) And with arousal, understanding boundaries and what is needed to reach satisfaction. Its accepting that sometimes that bad feeling is unavoidable and learning how to deal with it and making it a better feeling. Understanding how I experience attraction actually helped me settle on this identity. (I'm on both the aro and ace spec for reference.) Personality, aesthetic attraction, and how much I'd want to be friends with someone really dictates how my attraction works. So I realized I really like watching/reading and fantasizing and experiencing through others and that makes my arousal pop off lmao. Fanfics help a lot cause it brings me comfort knowing its characters I am familiar with and having control over what might be included in the sexual acts.

Going back to how I started this response - I can enjoy a piece of smutty media while my libido is high asf and be like yea, this is so fucking good. But would I actually want to be physically involved in the sexual acts I'm watching? No. Am I sexually attracted to the individuals doing the acts? probably not. A silly simple way I described it to someone else is: I'd fuck Mountain, but I also wouldn't, so watching him get fucked works just fine LOL

All that is not to say I wouldn't ever want to have a genuine physical experience with other physical bodies. I personally would and that doesn't change my identity (although does play part in why I'm specifically aego-gray). it would just take A LOT from me and the potential partner(s) for full satisfaction. (And it took me a few years to settle on all of this, so even answering this is helping me further understand.) So ya, I think I've said way too much already lol. That's a bit of my view of it and how I incorporated it into Mountain's character. It's totally okay if you vary from this and still identify with the same label. It's not a race to put a label on oneself either. I hope this insight was at least a bit helpful and interesting to read <3

[frozaru]

Review: Soundcore VR P10

Greetings everyone! Here I'll be giving my honest thoughts on what I'd consider quite unique earbuds - the VR P10 from Soundcore. They're catered for gaming and have verified functionality with VR headsets such as Oculus Quest 2. Peak your interest? These can be found priced at £99/$99 via Soundcore's official website + Amazon directly, or in-person stores if you live in USA. Let's get started!

📦Unboxing Experience:

Pretty clean packaging imo with it's appealing design in addition to convinience. They also come with a decent amount of silicone ear tips which will suit many ears big or small (medium worked for me). Simply looked and felt premium all around, which gives me a great first impression. Good job so far!

🔎Appearence [next to Soundcore Life A2]/Comfort:

Though I'm not a fan of this "Airpod stem" trend, these make an exception for me with nice silver details, signature logo finish + 3 customisable lighting modes (breathing, lights on and battery saving/lights off respectively). Those lights can indicate helpful stuff such as solid purple for on/fully charged, blue for pairing or flashing red when very low. Case looks great with a shape akin of stones...can I say it's included dongle is pretty neat too? Okay ty! Moving on, ear tips themselves also felt comfortable enough with only fatigue after some hours which was usually when both buds were low anyway. Speaking of...

🔋Battery/Connectivity:

You'll be glad knowing that these earbuds have USB-C featured both on case for charging and a connector on the dongle. Also expect about 5/6 hours on buds (in 'battery saving mode') with an average 24 hours of battery life after giving them a full juice up. This is enough to get through 4 or more gaming sessions in my experience! In terms of speed, 10 minutes shall grant approx 1 hour of battery life for those clutch on-the-go moments.

Facts regarding this dongle btw...it's incredibly versatile featuring multi-platform support for PC, PlayStation, mobile and even Switch with lag-free playback. What's more, it allows Bluetooth audio from phone + received audio SIMULTANEOUSLY with Game and Talk (something I haven't come across before in other true wireless earbuds)! They can also be further compatible for Switch in docked mode or older devices with a USB to USB-C adapter (here's my recommendation). I've found the feature pretty useful for communicating on Discord or taking a phone call without much compromise.

🎵Sound Quality/App Features

From my experience of "default" aka Soundcore's signature (no super hearing or Bassup), it seemed clear with bass which gladly dosen't drown out the mids and highs. Highs may sound weaker but that's kind of justified as these are geared for subtle audio like footsteps or gunfire rather than instruments like violins and pianos. BUT as we get into Souncore's feature rich app, there's so many settings to tweak and fit your personal taste!

You've got a plethora of equaliser options + the ability to create custom ones as standard with their app. Acoustic (my fav as it brings everything up a notch), Electronic, Pop, you name it. Mentioned earlier is bassup which allows bringing in more for a stronger punch which bassheads may enjoy and super hearing that will make subtle noises more audible, perfect for a competitive edge.

Speaking of tastes, let's talk colours with 5 options being light purple, red, pink, blue or Violet. Heads up that lighting will effect battery life to varying degrees. Have multiple dongles? Great news as which ones in use can be selected directly from app! Very useful if you're someone who has a busy life (on the flip side though, Soundcore hasn't made things clear rn regarding where more can be purchased).

💭Are these worth the purchase? If you're looking for something with striking design, good sound for gaming in a small package and flexibility with software and hardware, absolutely Imo! Although I would personally like to maybe see slightly improved battery if Soundcore ever comes back to this concept in future. That's it for this review, tysm for getting here! Oh, and if you'd like to help me create better content or maybe obtain better equipment by donations, I've recently created a Ko-fi! It's completely optional but if you do, I'll be really grateful. Take care and live a good life!

🎴My Carrd

[thedivinecalamity]

God I need to bitch so badly right now, I'll put it under a readmore since I don't know how long it will be

I fucking hate finding a new psychiatrist. My """current""" one used to be good but they partnered with a big practice and now I have no way of getting ahold of him, and the people he's asked me to speak to instead never respond to my emails, and one day I literally called them 5 times throughout the day and left a message, and they still never contacted me back. Oh but they'll gladly pester me about getting a new card in their system since the old one expired :) Except they still make me enter my card details every fucking time before an appointment, and one time it was declining my card despite knowing I had the money (it just said a general error) so I couldn't join the meeting, and had no way of contacting them so I ended up missing it :))

I found a new psychiatrist now, but I really dislike her. I'm sorry but I'm going to go on a misogynistic rant now, I do not care, I am a woman, I am allowed to criticize other women for being ableist towards me. I've noticed female psychiatrist are so much worse than male ones. All the female psychiatrists I've had have been the worst ones I've ever had, sure I won't deny that I have had bad experiences with men, but I feel like the men tend to listen to me at least? (I know that sounds insane, I do not think that for other medical fields absolutely not) I'm sure I have a sample bias, I won't deny that, but god I am tired.

Like I feel like female psychiatrists see someone mentally ill and feel the need to baby them?? Or treat them like idiots that know they have no clue what they could be talking about cause they're just that retarded. I've gotten this treatment way more from women, I just genuinely don't know why. And yes, I know I mentioned my current psychiatrist as 'he', and believe me I am pissed at him, but before he partnered with a larger company he would actually listen to me and believed in what I was saying.

I had an appointment with my new psychiatrist (who I hope at least improves or I can find someone new), it lasted only half an hour, but holy shit. I mention my symptoms and mental illnesses, including ocd which is especially hard to mention to people irl. After I'm done describing some of my symptoms, which I did not describe all because I am not very good at explaining things on the spot, she just goes "I don't think you have ocd, those symptoms sound like xyz and you do not have these very specific symptoms (despite how varied ocd can be)." Fuck You. You've known me for 15 minutes. I literally have an official ocd diagnosis. Yes she wouldn't know that since she hasn't gotten that paperwork yet, but in that case why don't you just shut the fuck up until it arrives. I absolutely know people like to self diagnose themselves with ocd all the time, partially as a joke. She probably has heard that a lot and maybe (hopefully) is "trying" to say I don't have it to not have it be such a misconception. But it goes both fucking ways. The amount of "well meaning" people I've had tell me that I do not have ocd because so many jackasses have self diagnosed themselves is staggering. You are not being helpful to people with ocd. I just have to hide it even more. Tbh, even if I was faking having ocd, what good even is that comment? I'm sure there's some people that would self reflect, but I think most would likely get defensive and double down.

I have another medication that helps with my concentration, and she believes in my other mental illnesses, but for some reason doesn't see how that medication helps me?? Despite describing how much of a life changer it is? I don't want to get into the details about this point really, but she's kinda threatening to take it away from me. This is another problem I've had with female psychiatrists. They seem so judgemental of medications and always try to get me off of mine. They make me feel like they're judging me as some sort of druggie. Maybe it has something to do with those women who believe medications are the devils work and use fucking home remedies like radiated mud or fucking crystals. They always seem to want to give me therapy instead of helping with my meds, despite the fact that I already have a therapist I can contact that actually fucking listens to me and helps me and believes that I have ocd. I swear to god these people want the pay of a psychiatrist but just want to practice therapy. I don't want therapy from you shithead! You don't believe in so many things I've said and seem to ignore anything else.

I can't fucking stand this shit anymore. I'm sure people would think I'm a total baby for getting upset at these things. I wouldn't be this upset if this was a one off. But I'm sick of hearing these types of comments and attitudes. I'm so sick of the jokes about ocd that people will make and then turn around and try to be "allies" by "correcting" me. I am sick of people acting like needing certain meds means your a druggie or a sign that you're a failure. This psychiatrist, and many others will say this shit to me, and then at 5:30 turn in for the day and completely forget this shit they've said, because it's not something they care or need to think about. It doesn't affect them. But I have to constantly deal with these fucking comments. I hate mentioning my ocd irl, but you kind of have to with psychiatrists. So I do. And this is what I fucking get? I have to involuntarily expose part of myself that normally I would only do after long trusting someone, and you take that and just fucking crush it, and you don't even realize it.

[tb-gerschutz]

Four

Word Count: 6,734

Trigger Warning(s): detailed description of ab*se, fear, threats

Summary: Anaysha and Oberyn attend the wedding of Sabas Targaryen and Taliya Lannister.

**********

ANAYSHA

I continued getting a very detailed tour of the palace, which is where I'll probably be calling home for the time being. I have to give the highest credit to the Red Viper because he had the generosity to let me stay here under full, guaranteed protection. Through all the stories and tall tales that I was told, I didn't think that the crown prince of Dorne would have even the slightest shred of humanity in him.

"So tell me, princess," he said while we were roaming around the upper level of the palace. "What makes your father such a bane to your existence?"

I sighed before starting on a long ramble as to why my father was such a pain. "He's much more controlling than a genuine father should be. If anyone dared to not agree with him, he'd start yelling and trying to convince them that they're wrong and he's right. He's also tried to push me into arranged marriages ever since I was fourteen, expecting me to get married instantly once I turned fifteen. But I kept objecting to them, keeping true to my belief about love and marriage."

I could tell he was interested in hearing what I had to say about my beliefs, which is what I didn't expect. "And what is your take on love?"

I shot him a glance before continuing on. "I think it should be birthed naturally. No one should have to be forced into loving someone, especially if it's someone you don't have any feeling toward. No matter how many times I would tell my father that I would eventually find love myself, he would still bring forth different princes—Lannisters, Targaryens, pretty much anyone he could find—and try to marry me off. It hasn't worked yet."

"For four years, he has tried that?" he asked.

"Tried and failed, Your Highness," I confirmed.

Silence has swooped in faster than the quickest raven, and I was left with a racing mind. What was I going to say next? How do I not make this conversation with the crown prince of Dorne not awkward?

"If I had the chance, Your Highness, I would gladly summon the strongest armies known to Westeros and invade my former home," I finally spoke up. "It would serve as not only the resolution to this long ordeal, but it also be my perfect chance at revenge against my father for putting me through hell all these years."

"At first glance, I wouldn't think of you as one to resort to revenge," he sneered in a flirtatious tone.

I chuckled lightly. "I only resort to such brutality if it's absolutely necessary."

He returned the light chuckle. "That is some common ground we can both stand on."

The prince then gave me insight into some of the diplomatic concepts behind Dorne and what he thought was best for its militaries. "Dorne is such a beautiful kingdom. A kingdom that doesn't need to initiate conflict to be powerful. Here, our diplomatic strategy is to stay out of foreign affairs and keep to the beauty here, while also privately building up our militaries. We don't resort to revenge and fighting back unless another kingdom threatens us first."

"I love that idea," I commented.

We stopped dead in our tracks, looking over the water gardens from a balcony. It was beautiful, indeed. A better change-of-pace compared to the raging gray seas back home. Meanwhile, the charming prince shot a subtly shocked glance over to me.

"Really? I would think you wouldn't dabble into other kingdoms' policies," he commented.

I shrugged. "I do that when I'm bored and wish for another life away from the hell my father's hammered down onto me. But of course, I love that custom of neutrality."

"You do?"

"Of course," I elaborated. "It protects the people and doesn't put them at greater risk. That's the best you can do as a ruler, or crown prince, in your case."

"So you're a princess of the people?" he asked.

"Grand Princess of the people, but yes. That is the basis of it," I replied.

He gave a crooked smile, which would be imprinted into my brain for the longest time. It warmed my heart, knowing that I somehow made an impression on the Red Viper himself. I felt special because of it.

"Now, come, my princess. We have a wedding to attend," he said, swiftly escorting me back to his sleeping chambers, where I assumed is where he typically gets ready for occasions like this.

I had no idea what I was planning on wearing to this celebration, nor did I know what this little trip would entail. Then again, I didn't know what my escape to Dorne would entail. I landed in Dorne, thinking that I would just be granted protection from my cruel father who's probably working to hunt down for my head right now. Now, I somehow agreed to a courtship with the most dangerous prince in the entirety of Westeros.

So far, that seems like one of the best decisions I've made.

Now, my next decision was: what in the hell was I going to wear to this wedding? I couldn't wear any of the clothes that I was wearing now. I didn't want to associate with the Iron Islands at all. Not while my father is still ruling the roost harshly over there. I needed something that helped me blend into Dorne's society effortlessly.

I sighed, finally working up the courage to utter some words toward the Red Viper, whilst we were in a room alone.

"I don't mean to be a burden, Your Highness, but—"

"Trust me, princess. While you are here, you will never be a burden," he interrupted quickly. "Now, tell me. What is it that you need?"

I gulped, making sure the hard lump in my throat was completely gone before speaking again. "I'm unsure of what to wear to this wedding, nor do I have anything new to wear to it."

He raised his head slightly as the corners of his mouth hooked upward, his dimples quietly showing. "Don't you worry. I have just the thing. In fact, I have options."

"Well, I'd love to see what you have to offer," I said in a hopeful tone.

He ended up pulling out a giant chest from a secret place I haven't known about. He then reached into it and pulled out several different dresses, all of which were brightly colored and absolutely stunning. Why the crown prince of Dorne kept these, I have no idea. Perhaps he was saving them for his future suitor.

"Here you are, princess. I have a lot of options for you here, all of which encapsulate Dorne's beauty," he said cheerfully. "They're brightly colored and have excellent detailing. I figured that I might as well save these for the next potential suitor that comes waltzing into my life."

I took a look at all of the dresses—three of them, to be exact—and ran my hand down their skirts. They felt especially soft. The softest thing I've felt in the longest time. I considered it as a token of the Red Viper's generosity, which is something that I assumed not too many people know about or even dare to discover. Only I was that person who somehow unlocked this new trait, and I didn't even intentionally do it.

"These are beautiful," I complimented.

"They're the finest Dorne has to offer," he boasted with an exceptional amount of pride.

I beamed with great joy, which is something I hadn't done in the longest time thanks to my father and his cold, iron fist. "Well, these are absolutely beautiful. I don't know how I'll manage to choose just one of these."

"Whatever you don't choose, I'll make absolutely sure that they make their way into your wardrobe," the Red Viper promised. "What do you think about that?"

"If you can manage to do that, that would be great!"

He managed to let out a low-toned, quiet chuckle that barely anyone could hear. Only I was the person who managed to detect that menacing yet seemingly comforting voice. "Princess, I can make anything happen at the drop of a pin. You can count on that."

Then came the long, painful sequence of seeing which dress I was to wear to this wedding celebration. It had to be brightly colored and make me look like one of Dorne's own, even though I wasn't. Even though I had tried on all of the dresses one by one, I still felt out of place. This was definitely what I'm not used to—bright-colored clothes with a lot of fancy detailing.

Once I tried on one particular dress, however, I felt...different. A new type of different. It was a beautiful, flowy, gold dress with all-over sparkles and flower decals. There was some ribbon—that was wrapped around the long sleeves that ran from my elbow down to my wrist—that dangled free, and the top part of this dress was designed in a cold-shoulder sort of way, so my shoulders were exposed for the most part. Even though I felt out of place, I felt a lot of comfort in this item of clothing.

"What do you think?" I asked the prince, who continued to give me a blank yet genuinely interested stare.

He cleared his throat quietly and tried to find the next words that would slide off that barbed tongue of his. "Well, what do you think, princess?"

I looked at myself in the dress, even twirling around once to feel the flow of it again. "I love it. I actually love it."

"Then, I love it too," he agreed, crookedly smiling again. "Besides, I think it fits you rather nicely."

I glanced down at myself, then laid my gaze back onto the Red Viper. "You think so?"

"I know so. And I'm a prince, so my judgment is always the truth."

Later on, the Red Viper and I were boarding the carriage that would take us to the wedding celebration. A carriage that was pulled by beautiful white stallions. It was definitely a change-of-pace from the black stallions that I would often run across on the Iron Islands for transport.

"I do have to warn you, Your Highness. There will be some people that I am related to there, so don't be surprised if I come across at least a couple relatives whilst we're there," I advised.

"Trust me. I won't judge," he said smoothly as he offered his hand to help me gently into the carriage.

As soon as Dorne's crown prince climbed into the carriage, we were then on our way to the wedding celebration of Sabas Targaryen and Taliya Lannister...and yet, the Red Viper hasn't yet found out a secret that I can't wait to tell him at this celebration.

* * * * * *

To pass the seemingly prolonged trip to Godsgrace, the prince and I engaged in a chat about our childhoods, to which I told him about my adventures with my older brother and younger siblings. That included the birth of my youngest sister—and sibling—Brealla, who is two years old. He talked about the encounters he had with his older brother Doran, who—despite being the one expected to take the throne because he's the eldest out of the Martell children—gave the opportunity at the throne to the Red Viper for reasons I have yet to find out.

And even though the Red Viper of Dorne had briefly mentioned his older sister Elia and recounted her tragic end, I stayed silent, not wanting to strike more nerves than he already did to himself.

"So your older brother gave you the throne?" I asked, switching the subject. "Might I ask why he did this? I would imagine the eldest child always gets the throne."

The prince shrugged. "Doran saw a future leader in me. He thought that I'd make a better leader than him, so he decided to abdicate his opportunity and give the 'crown prince' title to me."

"That seemed awfully nice of him," I commented.

"It was," the prince added. "So nice that I consider giving him a special royal role once I become king."

I glanced over to him. "Do you happen to know what role yet?"

The prince let out a sigh of doubtfulness. "I'm not sure yet. I'm sure I'll think of something in the future."

"As long as you keep to your word on your little promise," I voiced.

"I most definitely will," he said. "I'm a man of my word, princess. You don't ever have to worry about a broken promise on my end."

We soon arrived in Godsgrace, and let's just say it had a lot of foot traffic. Then again, these people were probably here for the royal wedding that was about to commence, so I couldn't blame the crowdedness on them.

"That's a lot of people," I remarked.

"It is, but then again, it's once again merging two of the most powerful houses in Westeros together," the prince said back. "House Targaryen and House Lannister...they're some of the most powerful houses in this realm."

After helping me out like princes generally do, the Red Viper offered his arm for me to take. I hesitated for a bit, mainly because this was the first time I've ever taken the crown prince of Dorne's arm. What can I possibly expect from doing this?

What the hell. Why not? I thought to myself as I took the prince's arm proudly. After all, I did have him in my back pocket for protection. Why not be proud of that?

As several people migrated toward the great sept up ahead, the prince and I took our time to arrive inside, allowing those in attendance to also see us as renowned guests. Well, I technically became a guest when Dorne's crown prince asked me to be his escort and his lover. Of course, I didn't complain because I had a legendary fighter and royal at my arm.

"Is this a royal sept?" I asked.

"It sure is, princess. The Great Sept of Godsgrace," he answered. "Why do you ask?"

"I've never been inside one before, nor have I ever seen one before. They're amazing. Don't get me wrong. Just—just forgive me because I haven't seen one before in my life."

"It's perfectly fine," he said with a smile.

The ceremony itself took an eternity, probably because it was considered a grand royal wedding. Only because it once again united the Lannister and Targaryen houses through marriage. Considering that these two houses are some of the most well-known and most powerful houses in Westeros, I wouldn't expect anything less.

"Does this wedding ceremony revolve around a certain religion?" I asked in a low tone voice as I turned toward the Red Viper.

"Faith of the Seven," he responded, also in a low tone whisper. "Typically, any weddings of this religion will entail lengthy ceremonies, held within a sept and conducted by the High Sept, with loads of prayers, vows, and customs. Celebrations of this religion vary from kingdom to kingdom, but in this case, you can expect a lengthy ceremony and a celebration at the end of it that lasts well into the night."

"Well, isn't there anything about consummating a marriage? I know my mother would mention her wedding to my father a lot, and she said that she had to consummate it by request of my father's side of the family."

"That depends on if you're a virgin or not. Sometimes, they do. Sometimes, they don't," he responded. "It just varies from region to region."

The ceremony went off without a hitch, with the beautiful Taliya donned in a stunning, long-sleeved wedding ball gown and young Sabas standing at the top of the aisle, waiting ever so patiently for his soon-to-be wife. I could see Sabas's face light up—and stay that way—all the way until Taliya was presented to him by her father.

Then came the long process of listening to vows and observing the customs of this ceremony, making sure that I go out of my way to bow my head in prayer and raising it up again once it was over. Through all this, I was constantly fighting the feeling of restlessness, wanting so badly to get up to my feet and move around at least a little bit. Luckily, the prince of Dorne was right there to make damn sure that I wouldn't move unless it was appropriate to, and I'll be forever grateful that he has the heart to do that. The heart of a lion, but also the heart of a gentle, little lamb.

Once Sabas and Taliya moved into one another and locked lips, everyone in attendance applauded for them, knowing that they were now a happy couple from now on. But deep down, I knew that they wouldn't just be a happy couple. Some day, a long time from now, they'll be the king and queen of God knows what kingdom. I'm not sure. This was the first time I'd seen Sabas in years, not since we were young children.

"Do you happen to know what kingdom they'll rule one day?" I asked, leaning in close to make sure I was speaking into his ear.

"Hard telling, princess. I've only heard rumors," he answered, "and I think most rumors say that Cersei Lannister might make them the grand prince and princess of Casterly Rock, just until they have enough preparedness to rule an entire kingdom."

"So they're given the titles of Grand Prince and Princess until they're ready to become king and queen in Cersei's eyes?"

He shrugged. "According to rumors. Nothing is confirmed as of yet."

As the many in attendance filed out to follow Sabas and Taliya, the Red Viper once again offered his arm. This time, however, I was less hesitant in taking it, for I had a deep feeling of trust in him. I could trust him with my life, and for right now, it's because of his fighting skills and his flirtatious yet equally brutal personality.

* * * * * *

The celebration after was something of a bustling occasion. Everyone was having a good time, drinking and gorging on the delicious food there. Throughout it all, I kept close to the crown prince of Dorne, who was quite chatty with the other guests. I, however, just remained at his side and quietly listened in on the conversations while constantly looking around for Sabas and Taliya. I wanted to wish them congratulations on their marriage sooner rather than later, and maybe introduce them to the Red Viper as my new lover.

"Prince Oberyn!" I heard a voice exclaim.

The prince and I turned to our left to find an older man walking toward us with a beaming smile. Of course, I knew his face. Trovion Targaryen, Sabas Targaryen's uncle. Although I don't have a relation to him, I knew and got along with him quite well.

"We're glad you could make it," Trovion said.

"And I'm thankful for the invitation," the prince commented, showing me to Trovion.

"And who have you here? Another paramour, I assume?"

"Actually, no. It's my new lover. We've recently agreed to enter a courtship," the prince proudly stated. "This is Anaysha Mullendore Sparr, Grand Princess of the Iron Islands. Her father is Brandeth Sparr, the king of the Iron Islands and head of House Sparr, and her mother is Giyana Mullendore, the queen of the Iron Islands and the former princess of The Reach."

I bowed to Trovion, who gave me a simple nod in acknowledgment. "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance, Your Highness."

"It's a pleasure to finally put a face to a name," I smiled, "and I'm thankful to have the opportunity to be here and celebrate with my cousin Sabas and all these people."

"Yes. He was extremely pleased when he found out that some of his cousins, including you, were coming to attend."

"Just a minute," the Red Viper added, keeping his dark eyes glued to me. "You're related to Sabas Targaryen?"

I smiled. "Sure am. He and I are first cousins on my father's side. I'll introduce you to his mother and father later on when we come across them."

"Of course, princess," he said.

After socializing with Trovion, I turned back to the Red Viper, who was still shocked about the secret I recently spilled.

"Your cousin is a Targaryen? You're related to a Targaryen?" he asked.

I chuckled. "I have several Targaryens and Lannisters in my bloodline. I lost count of how many, but I sure have an abundance of them."

At that moment, I caught a glance of Sabas and Taliya out of the corner of my eye, and they were greeting guests and smiling. I could tell that they were very much in love with one another. Hopefully, in the future, I'll eventually be madly in love with someone like that. I want that in a relationship: to be genuinely—and madly—in love with someone for the rest of my life. I hope to find that soon, but then again, I don't know.

"Come, princess. Let's go congratulate the happy couple," the Red Viper said.

He started to walk over to the happy couple, while I kept close to his side and matched his every stride. Like a snake, he slithered—or, in his case, walked—rather gracefully and smoothly, being absolutely confident in every step he took and having his head held high every inch he strolled. I tried to match that, but there was simply no way that I could. He was much bolder with his steps than I was. I could tell he had done this socialization a lot more than I have.

After talking with one of the guests with his new wife, Sabas glanced over to where the Red Viper and I were, his face instantly lighting up once he saw me. It had been several years since I last saw Sabas. We were about nine or ten when we last saw each other, so it's safe to say that Sabas changed a lot even though I still saw the sweet, caring ten-year-old in him.

"Anaysha!" he exclaimed, his smile covering most of his face.

"Sabas!"

I ran to him only a few feet ahead as we embraced each other tightly. Since we hadn't seen each other in years, it was especially comforting to be tightly wrapped in his arms. I didn't consider them as muscular as the Red Viper's, but Sabas's came in at a close second.

"You looked like you haven't changed a bit!" I remarked.

"It looks like you haven't either," Sabas responded. "You look like the perfect mixture between your mother and father."

"That's what everyone says," I chuckled.

I then turned my attention to Taliya, offering her my congratulations. "And Taliya, you look absolutely stunning. The most beautiful person here."

She played around with the skirt of her dress, admiring her look. "Thank you."

"And Prince Oberyn...we are so glad you were able to make it," Sabas commented.

The prince let a crooked smile emerge across his face. "Of course. It's a grand occasion. I had to make it to see another union between the Targaryens and Lannisters. It's never a dull moment to observe people like yourself so in love and so happy. I'm sure the rest of your lives will be filled with just that: happiness and love."

Sabas nodded in acknowledgment to the Red Viper. "Thank you. That's awfully considerate of you, Your Highness."

"Yes, Your Highness," Taliya said, curtsying to the crown prince of Dorne. "Thank you for your good will. We'll be sure to keep that close to us."

I was actually quite impressed with the Dornish prince. From all the tales I was told, I always assumed that he was a heartless, brutal conqueror whose legendary fighting skills are unmatched compared to his enemies. He still kept to this confident, tough personality, and I still see it in his dark, piercing, venomous eyes. Now that I'm by his side, I'm discovering a whole new side to him. A gentler, sweeter side. Even though his facade was a venomous, sneaky snake with the heart of a lion, deep down...he was still the same person, but with a gentle side that is but a lamb. I loved that he genuinely cared, and I hope that I find more to it as time goes on.

But one thing I'd change about it—on my end—is to call him by his actual name. Oberyn. I haven't done that yet, mainly because I wasn't sure if I truly loved and trusted him yet. The day, the moment, when I finally call him by his name is the day that he'll find that I truly love him and trust him with my life.

"Do you know where your mother and father are? I wanted to say hello to them after all this time," I asked Sabas.

"For sure! They're over there, up on that raised platform and underneath the tent," Sabas answered, pointing in their direction.

"Thank you," I said, starting to walk off to meet with my aunt Katryna, "and congratulations on the marriage once again, you two."

"Thank you," Sabas and Taliya thanked in almost-perfect unison, as the Red Viper quickly joined me.

I proudly marched over to meet with my aunt Katryna, my father's older bastard sister. Why she was a bastard daughter is quite simple in a stranger's eyes but a lot more complicated for someone who's related to her.

My aunt Katryna was born while my grandparents—my dad's parents—were still engaged. They got pregnant with her while they were still in their courtship. Come to think of it, I think it was right before my grandfather asked my grandmother for her hand in marriage. Anyway, my grandmother ended giving birth to my aunt a couple weeks before her wedding, and it's history from there.

"Have you ever met my aunt Katryna and uncle Darvon?" I asked.

The prince had to think about it for a minute before responding. "I don't think so. I've met so many people in my short life that I've lost count so long ago, so I might've forgotten."

I eventually found my aunt, who was sitting almost still in a fancy throne of hers. I could tell that it definitely wasn't the one she ruled on, but it was still a fancy enough chair to be considered a throne. I looked up to her as she observed the scene with a warm smile and kind eyes.

"Aunt Katryna!" I called out to her.

Her gaze shifted directly to me, and her already big smile seemed to get a lot bigger. "Don't tell me–"

"It's me. Anaysha," I said, as my aunt swiftly made her way down to me and the Red Viper.

She placed her soft hand onto my face, looking deep into my eyes. She was trying to find the part of me that had a piece of my father's soul. The part that made me carry on some of his features and keep some of his personality traits. Everyone always says that I am the perfect mixture between my mother and father, not looking exactly like one or the other. The features of both of them passed onto me just like it planned out—I had about half of each parent's features. In this case, my aunt was trying to see my father in me.

"My goodness, you have grown so much," she said. "You looked even more beautiful than when I last saw you years ago."

"If I might add, I say she's the most beautiful desert flower I've ever seen," the prince chimed in.

I was put into a state of shock. A good kind of shock. I had never heard of the Red Viper—one of the most dangerous people Westeros holds—complimenting someone like me genuinely on their beauty. At first glance, I saw him as a hungry lion waiting for his next opportunity to snatch his vulnerable prey. And even though I see that scary confidence with him, I'm starting to see a gentle lamb wanting so desperately to hold onto who and what he dearly loves the most.

"She most certainly is," my aunt remarked. "I can also attest that she got the stubbornness from them as well. Mainly her father."

"Me and my father are not on the greatest terms right now," I revealed.

"Really? What is it this time?" my aunt asked.

The Red Viper decided to chime in, putting his opinion on this whole abrasion between me and my father. "Basically, he's been abusing and threatening her for years."

I could tell his voice was getting more hostile by the minute, the more he talked about what I was going through. "This time, however, he put her up for execution on the baseless crimes of treason and incompetence. All because Her Royal Highness, here, stood up for herself against him. That tyrannical asshole."

I got closer to him, wrapping one arm around his waist and allowing the other to run up and down his arm in a comforting way. "Calm down. I'm okay for right now. Just calm down," I whispered into his ear.

He inhaled and exhaled sharply, making sure his nerves settled from the quiet rage that was building up. Some legends say that no one could manage to suppress the Red Viper's rage until it was done with or until he was satisfied enough with the disastrous torture he brought. Somehow—someway—I managed to do that. Did I just stop the Red Viper from going into one of his many rages, even though some say that it was nearly impossible to stop? I'm the only one to ever do that. I guess I have a special power that no one else possesses.

Briefly, I glanced at the ongoing scene, where plenty of people were still celebrating and having a good time. I was pretty gleeful too...until a familiar sight chilled me down to my bones. In the distance, I saw my mother and my older brother, who had his fiance Minella Targaryen on her arm. Then, the sight that frightened me. On my mother's arm was...my father. That cruel, heartless asshole father of mine. Although he looked like every other person with his smile and seemingly genuine nature, I knew deep down that he was anything but.

"He's here," I whispered to the Dornish prince in a low tone.

He turned his attention to me, being worried about my well-being. "Who's here, princess?" he asked.

"My father. That jackass of a father I have, he's here," I said.

When the prince finally caught a glance of my father, his brows furrowed in anger. His face contorted into such a face filled with explosive yet seemingly calm irritation, which made me shudder with fear being under his watchful eye.

"That's him? Your father?"

"Sure is," I confirmed.

"If I ever get my hands on him," he angrily voiced, trying to march over to my father and cause a scene.

Luckily, I was able to grab the Red Viper's wrist tightly and stop him from going any further. "Not so fast. Don't want to cause a scene, now do we?"

The prince turned back to me and saw my gentle face. My gentle, innocent face. I would assume that he didn't want to hurt me in any way or do anything that would risk the relationship I have with him breaking off.

"You're right, princess. I wouldn't want to do anything that pains you in a negative way," he concluded.

"And same with you. I don't want to do anything that negatively impacts you," I added. "If we're going to be in this courtship together, then we'll have to resist tapping into our old habits and negatively impacting each other. And it's a sacrifice that I'm willing to make to be with you, Your Highness."

He and I locked eyes, ultimately forcing us to stare deeply into the other's eyes. I was not breaking my stare with him, showing—in a silent way—that I wasn't afraid of him. The prince didn't break his stare either, for he was a viper who was gazing upon his next form of prey: me. But was he going to use me as another person he'd kill? Of course not. Instead, he used me as a lover—an ally, if you will.

Eventually, both of us broke the staredown simultaneously after several minutes. I could tell that the Dornish prince had a plan up his sleeve to keep me safe. After all, he's a sneaky viper ready to pounce when it is necessary. If he didn't have a plan up his sleeve, what was the point in agreeing to protect me?

"Don't worry. I have a plan. Just act as one of my paramours, and you should be fine.," he said in a low-tone voice, leaning in close to my ear to whisper something no one else around would hear, but me. "You have nothing to worry about. I'm not going to let anything happen to you, princess."

After parting ways with my aunt Katryna, I took the prince's arm firmly as he led me through the giant crowd of people, away from where my family was. I trusted the Red Viper with my life at this moment, but do I fully trust him? Not yet. When that moment of when I can finally trust and love him, I'll call him by his actual name.

He eventually led me to the secret gardens that were just a few feet from where the celebration was happening. No one knew of its location but the Red Viper himself, who seems to know every part of Dorne like the back of his hand. I have to give him credit for knowing all of what goes on within his kingdom. That shows how much he cares about the place that he will one day rule.

"Here we go," he said. "The secret gardens of Godsgrace. No one knows about this place but me."

"How come?" I asked curiously.

"No one knows where it is, nor do they have quite enough motivation to go and find it for themselves," he answered. "Only I know where it is. It's Dorne, after all. I know this kingdom and all of its inner workings like the back of my hand. Everything that's here, everything that goes on within these borders...I know about."

As we calmed ourselves and gathered our breaths, the Viper and I took it upon ourselves to walk among the luscious landscaping. It was all bright and beautiful indeed, but I believe the sights at Sunspear are the surroundings I prefer to bear witness to more often.

"At least you're safe right now," he remarked.

"Yes. Thank you for that," I answered, being especially grateful for the Red Viper. "I greatly appreciate someone who goes out of their way to protect someone like me."

"I promised that I'd protect you with all my life. And I'm doing just that."

As we continued to stroll through the gardens, we carried on with a conversation about power and how it can change people either for the better or worse. It all depended on how it was used and dealt with.

"It's a funny thing, Your Highness. My father, a titan in his own right, thirsts for more power in an effort to rule the land," I remarked. "His problem...he abused his opportunities at getting power, wanting more than what was already given to him. He thinks he's a god now that he possesses all this power, but he is anything but. Instead, he's a cruel, vicious monster that thirsts for my blood. That's what happens when you want more power and go on to abuse it."

I paused to formulate my next words, while the prince stayed silent in order to listen to what I had to say. "Gods are beings that use their power wisely, being careful not to abuse it. That's how gods and titans are different. It's all in the way they use their power. All titans aren't bad, but in my case, my father is a fallen titan. But gods are much more intelligent with how they use their strengths, unlike my father. If anything, I consider someone like you a god. You're careful with your power, and you don't abuse it. You use it to strengthen your kingdom and protect the people that live within it. That's what I admire in a royal. They focus on what's best for the people and put their needs first."

"I appreciate the compliment, princess," he answered.

"You have to think, Your Highness, gods and titans may not think alike. Me and my father do not see eye-to-eye when it comes to you," I added. "It's a shame to reflect on what my father has thought of you. I consider it a cruel joke of his."

"And which joke of his is that?"

I sighed. "That you're a monster. The most dangerous person to ever come across. He says that you're a man who should be avoided at all costs. I, however, think differently. I think of you as a man of pride and virtue. A legendary fighter who has the heart of a lion and the gentleness of a lamb. I had to find out for myself that my father was wrong about you. He made you out to be the villain, even though I never once thought that."

"He simply hasn't got the heart to know me more," the prince sneered, "like you."

"Well, you can attribute that to the fact that I have a lot more patience than my father," I added, lightening the mood a tad.

Both the prince and I shared a smile, which made me feel much safer with him. I was comfortable around him. He welcomed me into Dorne with open arms, which was something that caught me off-guard considering his inhuman nature.

"I do have to ask, princess. Why did you pen letters to me all those times? Out of all the people in the world, why me?" he asked, switching the subject.

"I was lost, and I needed advice. I thought that I might as well ask the most powerful prince in Westeros for it."

I paused before speaking again. "I'm sorry, Your Highness. I'm overstaying my welcome. I feel like a burden to you. I don't want to be that with you."

We stopped dead in our tracks, as the prince turned to me and grabbed both of my shoulders firmly. With his dark, razor-edged eyes, he stared deep into my soul, making me quiver with slight fear. I wasn't afraid of him, no. But I was afraid of the brutal actions he might take.

"Listen to me. You have never been a burden to me, nor will you ever be a burden. I welcomed you here with open arms, and you will get open arms for this time onward," he said in a serious tone. "I made a promise to protect you, and I will do just that. And one more thing. I agreed to this courtship with you because you were intelligent in multiple aspects, a good kind of bull-headed, a risk-taker, and absolutely beautiful. More beautiful than all the women here in Westeros. And if I thought you were a burden, I would've sent you out of this kingdom in a heartbeat. The truth is, you never will be a burden to me, and I'll do everything in my power and more to ensure that you are safe and comfortable from the hell you were forced to be dragged through. That's the bottom line."

A deafening silence loomed over us, as I continued to stare blankly into the Viper's piercing eyes. It was frightening, sure, but I didn't consider it as a threat to my life. Despite him being a force of nature with an iron fist, I thought of him as someone that could do good in this world. Someone that I trusted more deeply than my own father. Hell, if I had the opportunity to, I'd leave my family for the prince anytime, for he makes me feel more alive than I have ever been. 

[glknight]

New WIP Progress

So I've been working on Twilight's Daughter for a good long while (over five years, which is... insane to me). But I chose to take a break from that story.

Why?

Easy... I'm working on a new Novel.

"Wha- Buh- Writing ANOTHER STORY isn't taking a break?!", right?

Yes, true. But unlike Twilight's Daughter, which is Fantasy HORROR, this new novel will be Fantasy NOIR. No D&D like races. No dark gods. No extradimensional chicanery. Just humans, classism and class warfare, magic, a massive sea and rain.

Lots and lots and lots and LOTS of rain.

The new WIP is called DROWNED CITY. Set on the massive city-state/island of Shallow, where people arrived there with no memory of how or why over 200 years ago. And currently, amidst this eternally dark and rainy world surrounded by a stormy body of water called The Abyssal Sea, they have made due. Some would dare say they have thrived in this 1920's like cityscape.

And it's all thanks to Storm Walkers, a select group of people who are naturally gifted with storm related magic. Some are able to call down lightning. Others can call upon the clouds themselves. Some, the mighty winds.

Lionel Song, a "Seeker" (aka Private Investigator), is one such person. His gift, a minor magic that helps him go where he needs to or look for clues or details that he calls "Slipping Between The Raindrops", isn't considered very useful. But it helps him stay on his toes and keep his head above water, as well as the added benefit of remaining dry when he takes a stroll through any downpour. A gift he'll need to rely on when he's called upon to do a job for one of the wealthiest families in Shallow named The Winterwinds.

His gift allows him to find the clues he needs to solve any case. But what happens when the job grows too big to contain? When the truth he uncovers unleashes a potential storm the likes of which will decimate the entire way of life for everyone on the island? Will he bring the truth to the surface? Or will he be yet another victim of the tides in this Drowned City?

---

Yeah, it's that kind of story. Raymond Chandler mixed with Brandon Sanderson and Emily Bronte, set in a fantasy world of twinkling street lights in eternal night, the drone of falling rain, the crashing of the waves and the disparity struggle found in the best of Gotham and Gothic fiction.

And the best part? I might have the rough draft of Chapter 01 ready for people to read by next week. Looking for the best places to post it, so if anyone wants to read it? Let me know! I'll gladly share it.