#in this house we love and support mona marshall

[izzyizumi]

DigiAdv U.S. dub Blu-ray liner notes: Actually it was Mona Marshall (Izzy's U.S. dub voice actor!!!) who came up with Izzy's "Prodigious!" quote---

m E, WIPING TEARS: ("MONA MARSHALL THANK YOU FOR MY LIFE")

[ultraericthered]

Anime Update V2 35

Wolf’s Rain - YES. We finally get to meet Blue in her gloriously sexy human form, and she’s every bit as cool as you’d think she’d be. Quent really doesn’t deserve her, especially when he spends this episode getting drunk at a bar along with Hubb, and while I feel terrible for his past, his response to it being “kill all wolves!” lessens the sympathy. I felt worse for poor Lord Darcia at the start, who returned to his keep with Cheza only to find that Harmona came unplugged from her life support and has died, rendering his capture of Cheza utterly pointless. Seeing his breakdown over it was tough. Blue seems to have parted ways with our wolves and they’re headed westward to Darcia’s keep in order to retrieve their flowery friend.

Hunter x Hunter - Fortunes were read (including a fake fortune that Hisoka wrote to fool the Spiders), moves and counter-moves were made, we get to see the junkyard that the Phantom Troupe has made into their home city, and by the end Gon and Killua have come face to face with Chrollo himself, while elsewhere the last remaining holdout of the Nostrade Family’s hired help is brutally killed, with the Spiders now knowing how Kurapika looks like and will be closing in on him fast. Alll the good stuff that should’ve been included in the 1999 anime and led to its finale but didn’t for no good reason.

Fruits Basket - A stellar episode in its first half (the haunted house sequence, particularly everyone’s reaction to the tragic backstory Haru made up about one of its characters, was comedy gold!) becomes a surprisingly weak episode in its second half. I didn’t mind Arisa and Kureno hitting it off even in spite of the age gap between the two, but when they’re at the diner, all of a sudden, Arisa starts behaving in a MASSIVELY out-of-character way, having fallen head over heels in love with this guy way too quickly and acting as though she was owed this super deep romantic relationship with him that they did not have because they barely even know each other at this point! Nothing about Arisa’s character suggests she’d act this way and even that aside there is no set-up in the story for this. Kureno admitting he now has strong feelings for her too was just salt in the wound. This is a romantic subplot that had no internal logic, does its characters a major disservice, and has aged so poorly, why is it still a thing in this anime? Kureno, you can go crawling back into the arms of your master Akito and leave Arisa and Saki alone, you BIG COCK!

Rozen Maiden - The literal clock-stopping climax of this anime, where Kirakishou materializes herself into the alternate world, as apparently one of the existing Rozen Maiden sisters' body parts were made to make this body for her. At first I guessed, like Shinku did, that it was Hinaichigo’s, so the reveal that it was Souseiseki’s caught me by complete surprise. Suiseiseki also returns and, being tricky as ever, gets adult Jun to kiss her ring for a pact only to reveal that it’s her twin’s ring, which frees Souseiseki from Kirakishou. Adult Jun finally gets to meet his younger counterpart, and it looks like the story is almost ready to write Adult Jun out, which would honestly be quite the shame ‘cause I like him and all Kid Jun evokes in me here is “Man, I wonder how Mona Marshall would’ve sold this material?”

Fate Zero - The focus was mainly on Waver & Rider, and also on Ryunosuke & Caster. The two relationships could not be more different. Waver takes a lot of issues with his servant but at the end of the day they are there for each other and it’s quite wholesome, whereas Ryunosuke and Caster has the superficial appearance of wholesome friendship but...they’re insane mass murderers with warped, psychotic worldviews. And by the end Caster’s summoned this fucking Cthulhu thing that Saber, Lancer, and Rider must fight!

Senki Zesshou Symphogear - A fun and charming three person date between Hibiki, Miku, and Tsubasa. An epic comeback concert by Tsubasa that serves as her decision to take an overseas contract. Chris struggling to find her place in the world and we learn Genjuro was to become her guardian after she was rescued from trafficking two years ago, but she refused his help and still does. And a big battle against attacking Noise while the concert is going on, with Hibiki and Chris as allies. All good stuff, all in this episode. My one issue was that Tony Glaze character, the record company president. Maybe it’s just too much Pokemon exposure, but I just kept expecting him to be revealed as a major villain but nope, he does nothing.

AMC: Kill la Kill - The mini tournament arc. To be expanded on later.

AND

Happy Sugar Life - At long last, I have reached the end of this dark, twisted, tragic tale of love and pain. There’s much I could say here but I think I want to really focus on just three points in particular.

- The tension and the build-up to what was going to happen in this big climactic point of the story gave me some of the most legitimate heebie-jeebies and anxious feelings I’ve experienced in any anime. Which might explain why with everything following Auntie striking the match and setting the fire, I was a teensy bit underwhelmed? The skirmish between Satou and Asahi was rushed, the moment with the still tied-up Mitsuboshi was rushed and uncomfortable (I so wanted a fiery explosion to come from behind him and take him out of his misery already!), the confrontation between Shio and Asahi lacked some of its most crucial components (making Shio seem like just a brainwashed brat who hates her family), and even the big fall that this entire story had been building to was rushed (though the ED Credits song in the background was nice!). And that’s to say nothing of pointless bits like Asahi somehow living through getting crushed by a flaming fence, and something that bothers me in the manga too, Asahi finding Shouko’s dead body, since narratively it accomplishes nothing - Asahi already had plenty of reason to want to clobber the shit out of Satou with his bat, he really didn’t need that extra push!

- But for all that the climax was lacking, the episode more than delivered with its core objective: how it concludes the story, but especially Satou’s story (and Shio’s to a lesser extent.) Her putting together and setting in motion a plan to both dispose of her murder victim’s corpse and fake her own death while she leaves town with Shio that specifically involves putting dozens of innocent lives at risk but she thinks absolutely nothing of that (like, doesn’t even mention it once!) really shows how callous, calculating and truly sinister beyond redemption Satou is. Her downfall coming about because she forgot a sentimental item in a momentary daze of gnawing guilt over what she did to Shouko was poetic, as was her usage of Mitsuboshi fully backfiring on her and her getting beaten down by Asahi. And her death, with every thought and feeling inside her flashing during the fall ‘til she finally grasps what love is truly all about and that she was never romantically into Shio the way she thought she was, as she shields Shio from the landing that takes her life because she loves this child so much she would give her life for hers, as she wishes her to live on with her best chance at finding happiness in the world. That is just fucking beautiful. A powerful testament to the bonds of love we humans are capable of forming and how they grow and shape us.

- Lastly, there’s the final resolution and how I suspect it’s polarized a lot of people. Because suddenly, the narrative that had seemed fairly neutral up to now takes a HARD shift into being primarily on the side of Satou and Shio. The disastrous decision to head back to the soon-to-be-burning apartment complex for the ring is framed in a positive way ‘cause at least the girls are on the same page and support each other. Shio definitively choosing Satou over Asahi is played as a big triumphant moment, like Shio made the right call because Satou Loves Her Best. The double suicide (which Shio suggests to start with, what the actual fuck Shio?) is played like a pure and sweet true love moment prior to Satou’s sudden ephiphany. And in the end, it’s Satou who has the last laugh from beyond the grave, as Shio now keeps her and Satou’s “happy sugar life” alive within her heart and mind 24/7 and is essentially “reborn” as Satou’s successor, making her incompatible with Asahi and their mother. For Shio, this is a happy ending. Literally no one else is left with any such happiness, except for Auntie, who was complicit in mass murder and is all too elated to be going to jail as the sole culprit. It’s your typical horror story ending where the monster comes out on top and the de-facto good guy has failed. Except that Asahi was explicitly painted as the antagonist who we should want to see lose, with Satou and Shio as our protagonists we should want to see successful and happy? Yeah, you can see why this finale could really confound and upset people.

So, the reason I’m OK with it? For one thing, it fits the way everything was built up and feels true to where these characters ended up, but the main reason, srangely enough, has to do with Asahi. As I’ve brought up elsewhere, Asahi’s quest was ill-fated from the very start. Because he wasn’t pursuing an actual person to bring back into his actual family - he was pursuing the idea of a person in hopes of realizing the idea of a happy family. It was naive fantasy and blind faith-based optimism that he was pushing against reality, hurting himself and others the more he did so and the more reality refused to bend to his prefences. So I don’t think he was bound to fail, I think, ultimately, he needed to fail. That his own failure he’d have to face up to is the best thing that could possibly happen to him. ‘Cause now not only is Shio “released from Hell” and free to chart her own path in life in search of new happiness, so is Asahi. For as traumatic and unfair as everything has been for him, the boy can now finally begin to move beyond his past, stare down and bury his inner demons, and figure his shit out so that he may forge a better life for himself and at last find the love, peace, and happiness that he more than deserves.

Hello, and Goodbye, Happy Sugar Life...

[steenpaal]

Stereolizza - Wikipedia

Stereolizza Background information Origin Kiev, Ukraine Genres Urban pop, dance-pop Years active 1998–present Labels StereoZzilla Music, Magic Records, Ego Music, Kontor Records, Ukrainian Records Website www.stereolizza.com Members Lizza and AlecZero Past members Ingvo, Hardtennis, LJ, Denis Fekolin, Yegor Fekolin

Stereolizza (before 2009 – Stereoliza), is an urban pop band, based in Los Angeles, California. The core of the group is Lizza (birth name – Kateryna Shalayeva) – lead singer and songwriter; and AlecZero (birth name - Oleksiy Ginchev) – songwriter, record producer, multi-instrumentalist.

Overview[edit]

“X.Y.Z.” – the first single from “X-amine Your Zippa” album that made the group popular in Europe in 2005-2006 remained on top of the charts of Ukrainian, Russian, Polish radio stations (Europa Plus, Europa FM, Hit FM, Gala Radio, Radio NRJ, Prosto Radio, ESKA Radio, RMF FM and other).[1][2][3]

Stereolizza’s music videos were broadcast and charted on major TV channels of Ukraine, U.S., Russia and Poland (MTV, M1, OTV, TVP1, TVP2, Polsat, International Music Feed, etc.)

The band’s songs became soundtracks for the following movies and TV shows:

Hello, I’m Your Daddo! (Russian – «Здрасьте, я ваше папо!») – MTV Russia, 2006 (“X.Y.Z.”) [4][5]

Dikari (Russian – «Дикари») – feature film, Russia, 2006 (“X.Y.Z.”) [6]

Moonlight (TV series), Episode 10 “Sleeping Beauty” - CBS, USA, 2007-2008 (“X.Y.Z.”)[7][8]

Side Order of Life, Episode 10 “Awakenings” – Lifetime (TV network), USA, 2007 (“X.Y.Z.”) [9]

Forever Strong – feature film, USA, 2008 (“Corporate Logic”) [10]

History[edit]

Formation and early years (1998-2003)[edit]

Lizza and AlecZero met in a 7-piece jazz cover band[11] in Kiev, Ukraine, where Lizza was one of the lead singers and AlecZero played bass guitar. The band performed at various live venues playing jazz standards and evergreen hits for a couple of years, unless Lizza and AlecZero got together on a side to create their own music.[12] The name Stereolizza derived from playing around with the name of Leonardo da Vinci’s masterpiece Mona Lisa, that the band transformed into Mono Lisa and to the final band name Stereolizza that integrates feminine appearance with musical vocation.[13]

The band’s Russian language album Escape (Russian – Побег, 1999), fully written by AlecZero, was not simply a compilation of songs, but rather a conceptual Rock opera, where all songs were liaised into one piece of work – a story about a virtual girl with a name Stereolizza,[14] who lived in the World Wide Web and ran away from an imaginary Cosmo-jail into a mega-city, looking for better life and adventures. “Escape – is all about breaking stereotypes, about escaping from principles imposed by society that are suppressing many people.” [15]

Although this being the first attempt to create a virtual artist on the music scene, Stereolizza’s new album was dubiously perceived by local mass media and was not commercially successful.

International start (2003-2008)[edit]

Despite the failure of the debut album, the duo continues to write songs. Influenced by Eminem’s The Slim Shady LP and The Marshall Mathers LP, Lizza is trying herself in Hip hop, now contributing to the songwriting process with AlecZero, but this time their songs are in English. Enticed by the international potential of the band’s new material, Ukrainian Records, a licensee of Universal Music Group in Ukraine, signs them to a multi-album deal in 2003.[16]

The group gets into the studio to turn their demos into records with AlecZero supervising the music production.[17] Although, the recording process took much longer than the band expected due to the Orange Revolution that started happening in Ukraine in 2004.

Stereolizza and The Black Eyed Peas

Finally, in 2005 Ukrainian Records launches Stereolizza’s X.Y.Z. – the first single of the X-amine Your Zippa album. X.Y.Z., the abbreviation of the examine your zipper, is a derogatory message, addressed to Lizza’s imaginary partner in a promiscuous relationship.[18] The music video for the single was shot in New York City by Radioactive Films and directed by Victor Priduvalov. The song later became Stereolizza’s breakthrough hit on the European market.[2][3][19]

The follow-up single Corporate Logic derides corporate ethic rules that everybody knows of, but nobody abides by in a regular day-to-day office life. The music video, directed by Jason Argyropoulos and produced by Tree Filmworks in Los Angeles, was influenced by the era of Art Deco and the story of Bonnie and Clyde.[20]

In 2006, during The Black Eyed Peas’ Monkey Business Tour Stereolizza were selected to be the only opening act for the American band in Palace of Sports, Kiev, Ukraine. Stereolizza themselves started touring with the support of the national mobile operators Kyivstar GSM and djuice, lined up with the artists like Apollo 440, Sean Paul, The Chemical Brothers and Planet Funk.[21]

X-amine Your Zippa album, released in Ukraine (2006), Poland (2006), Russia (2007), EU (2006) and UAE (2007), established Stereolizza as one of a kind white female hip-hop performer at that time. Some mass media claimed Lizza was “Eminem dressed in a skirt”.[12]

Album track list:

Title Length 1. "Goodbye, Pimp!" 3:42 2. "X.Y.Z." 3:35 3. "Since We Live Together" 3:12 4. "Favorite Mistress" 4:05 5. "Corporate Logic" 3:39 6. "N.Y. Hairy Tale" 3:20 7. "Rapture" (Blondie's cover) 3:21 8. "Cop My Getup" 3:30 9. "Rough" 3:07 10. "When You Are Here" 3:34 11. "Love Fight Game Loser" 3:36 12. "Trust To Yourself" 3:47

The European version of the album released by Universal Music Group International (London, UK) also included a cover song to Blondie (band)’s Rapture.[22]

In 2007 Stereolizza was being sponsored by the manufacturer of kid’s clothes and uniforms Yunist, taking part in photo shoots, runways and charity events for kids.[23][24] At that same period of time Lizza accepts an offer from Playboy [25] to pose for their November 2007 front cover, thus demonstrating her contradictory behavior that made her even more liked by the band’s fans and hated by the others.

In the end of 2007 M1 Music Channel invites Lizza to be a celebrity co-host of Guten Morgen – a national daily morning show.[26] Writing songs for the next album with AlecZero and playing occasional shows, Lizza was combining her music and hosting career all the way through the middle of 2008.

Move to the U.S.A. (2008-present)[edit]

Stereolizza performing live during DJUICE Festival

When Stereolizza felt they had enough material for the new album, it turned out Ukrainian Records were not able to cover the recording costs and to further invest in the artist’s career, and Stereolizza were dropped from the label thereafter. By coincidence, at this very moment the band received an offer from several U.S. promoters to play shows in the United States. The band packed their instruments and left Ukraine to perform in a couple of American cities, not yet knowing that Los Angeles would then become their final destination.[27]

Having settled in Los Angeles the group continued to play shows at local live venues, colleges and universities.

Later on AlecZero and Lizza become U.S. residents, upgrade their home studio and form their own label, StereoZzilla Music.[28] At this time AlecZero further develops his hands-on music production skills, which made it possible for the band to complete their songs independently and release them on their own label.

In 2012 Stereolizza released a pop-dance single Carousel. It was produced by AlecZero, mixed by Ariel Chobaz, mastered by Brian Gardner (Big Bass) at the Bernie Grundman Mastering. The cover art for Carousel was created by a world-renowned graphic designer from Brazil Adhemas Batista.[29] The track received an award from Malopolskie TV as Best Summer Hit of 2012.[30][31]

Four months later a Swedish house label Clubstream pink released Stereolizza’s Carousel Club EP with remixes from Inossi, DJ S1 and U4Ya.[32]

Go Back To Your Mama – another recent track from the band. Stereolizza continues to work in the style of urban pop, keeping their “hook” from the times of X.Y.Z. – aggressive verses and melodic choruses, but this time adding some elements of house music. The music video was shot in Los Angeles and Lancaster, California and premiered on M1 Music Channel.[33]

Go Back To Your Mama EP was released worldwide by Ego Music on March 15, 2013 and included remixes by Rico Bernasconi & Jordy and Stereo Palma.[34]

Go Back To Your Mama - Release History

Region Format Date Label Poland, Czech Republic, Bulgaria[35] iTunes digital download January 9, 2013 Magic Records Germany, Austria, Switzerland[36] iTunes digital download February 1, 2013 Kontor Records Israel[37] iTunes digital download February 28, 2013 Teta Making Music Israel Italy & worldwide[38] EP (remixes) digital download March 8, 2013 E2/Ego Music Spain[39] EP (remixes) digital download April 22, 2013 Roster Music Greece[40] iTunes digital download May 13, 2013 PlanetWorks Latin America[41] EP (remixes) digital download May 2013 MAS Label Hong Kong[42] EP (remixes) digital download June 3, 2013 ToCo Asia

Band members[edit]

Current members

Lizza – lead vocals (1998–present), songwriting

AlecZero – guitar (1998–present), keyboards (2005–present), songwriting, music production

Former members (touring)

Ingvo – DJ, keyboards (2005-2009)

Hardtennis – keyboards (2006-2008)

Yegor Fekolin – drums (2006-2008)

LJ - sound engineer (2005-2007)

Denis Fekolin - sound engineer (2007-2008)

Discography[edit]

Побег (Russian, Escape) album – 1999

X-amine Your Zippa album – 2006

Carousel single – 2012

Carousel Club EP - 2012

Go Back to Your Mama EP – 2013

Set My Heart On Fire single – 2014

Cool Cat single – 2015

Boys & Girls single – 2015

Don't Tell Your Wife single – 2016

Wonderland single - 2016

Awards and nominations[edit]

WideScreen Film and Music Video Festival[edit]

WideScreen Film and Music Video Festival was founded in 2014 in Miami, FL, with a mission to inspire the creation and distribution of art, while ultimately enhancing the creative mind.[43]

Year Nominee/work Award Result Ref. 2017 Stereolizza - Wonderland (music video) Best Music Video Cinematography Won [44][45] Stereolizza Best Recording Artist Won [44][46]

References[edit]

^ Top40.com Charts, Retrieved May 23, 2007

^ a b Euro Web Charts. Issue #157. Retrieved May 3, 2007

^ a b Top40-charts.com. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ Кинопоиск, Movie Credits. Retrieved August 18, 2012

^ Soyuz.ru "Сборник Здрасьте, я ваше папо!", Soundtrack list. Retrieved September 12, 2008

^ Кинопоиск, Movie Credits. Retrieved August 18, 2012

^ Episode World, "Moonlight (2007). Retrieved September 16, 2012

^ TV.com, Moonlight - Season 1, Episode 10: Sleeping Beauty. Notes - featured music. Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ IMDB, TV series profile. Retrieved September 16, 2012

^ "Forever Strong Wiki Page, Soundtrack

^ Stereofame.com, Bio. Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ a b Sushko, Yulia. "Eminem in a Skirt", Max Magazine (Ukraine), April 2006

^ Zvezdi.ru. "Stereolizza's bio". Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ Demchik, Oleg. "She fell in love and wrote songs about him. He turned out to be a computer." 2000 Newspaper (Ukraine), issue #24(126), June 13, 2002

^ Special Radio. From the album liner notes. Retrieved April 10, 2012

^ Fcaua.com, Artist bio: Stereoliza. Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ Discogs.com, Alex Ginchev Profile. Retrieved July 27, 2012

^ "Artist of the Week: Stereolizza." (Interview), Welcome 2 NYC Magazine. Retrieved March 25, 2009.

^ "Stereolizza only trust professionals". Art Mozaic (Ukraine), issue #24, June 18, 2006

^ "Corporate Art Deco", interview with Stereolizza. Pink Magazine (Ukraine), April 2006

^ "DJUICE Music Drive Tour. Line-up", Last.fm. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ Amazon.co.uk Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Stereoliza Will Open "Yunist" Store." E-motion.com, June 6, 2007 Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Stereoliza became a face of "Yunist" school uniform." Musictime.com.ua, March 13, 2007. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Stereoliza. Sweet Life of Ukrainian Hip Hop". Playboy (Ukraine), November 2007

^ Skrypal, Anna. "Love affair with a TV camera." July, 2008. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ Serge. "American Roller-Coasters: Stereolizza", Zavtra.fm, July 9, 2012. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ StereoZzilla Music's Official Website. Retrieved October 25, 2012

^ "Adhemas Batista Will Create Stereolizza's cover artwork!", Stereolizza's official website. Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ "Stereolizza's "Carousel" is Voted The Best Summer Hit 2012", Stereolizza.com, August 16, 2012. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Music Zone Recommends - Stereolizza's Summer Hit 2012!" Malopolskie.tv, August 14, 2012. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Provocative Ukrainian Signs With Swedish Record Label." Mi2N.com, July 6, 2012. Retrieved October 24, 2012

^ "Go Back To Your Mama Premier", Stereolizza.com, October 5, 2012. Retrieved October 23, 2012

^ Release Credits Info on iTunes

^ "Zespół Stereolizza powraca z nowym, elektryzującym hitem!". www.magicrecords.com. 2013-01-09. Retrieved 2013-05-28. 

^ "Kontor - House of House Volume 17". www.buy.kontor.tv. 2013-02-01. Retrieved 2013-05-29. 

^ Teta Making Music

^ "New singles: Stereolizza "Go Back To Your Mama"". www.egomusic.net. 2013-03-08. Retrieved 2013-05-29. 

^ "Stereolizza's EP on iTunes Spain". www.itunes.apple.com. 2013-05-07. Retrieved 2013-05-29. 

^ ""Go Back To Your Mama" Greek Release". www.stereolizza.com. 2013-05-13. Retrieved 2013-05-29. 

^ "+MAS Label - Releases, Go Back To Your Mama". MasLabel.com. 2013-05-15. Retrieved 2013-06-06. 

^ "Stereolizza "Go Back To Your Mama" iTunes Hong Kong". iTunes. 2013-06-03. Retrieved 2013-06-20. 

^ "WideScreen Film & Music Festival". FilmFreeway.com. 2014-03-03. Retrieved 2017-04-11. 

^ a b "Stereolizza Wins Two Prestigious Awards at the WideScreen Fest". Stereolizza.com. 2017-02-19. Retrieved 2017-04-11. 

^ "WideScreen Award Winners 2017 - Official List". WSF Official Facebook Page. 2017-02-24. Retrieved 2017-04-11. 

^ "WideScreen Award Winners 2017 - Official List". WSF Official Facebook Page. 2017-02-24. Retrieved 2017-04-11. 

External links[edit]

[bellabooks]

“Pretty Little Liars” S7 E12 Recap: These Boots Were Made for Stalking

Previously on Pretty Little Liars, A.D. crafted an elaborate board game for the Liars that shoots out evidence and will most likely murder them all…hopefully before Ezria’s wedding! We pick up with the Liars in Spencer’s barn, eyeballing the board game. They wonder if it’s spying on them, and the answer is YES EVERYONE IS SPYING ON YOU GIRLS AT ALL TIMES WE’VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR YEARS NOW. Ali thinks that Jenna built the game, but Hanna reminds them that Jenna is blind and therefore probably can’t build elaborate Jigsaw-like traps for them. Or can she? Hanna put the knife away, we’re playing Hungry Hungry Hippos   Emily emphatically declares that she won’t be bullied anymore as she’s not in high school, and the Liars remind her that she is literally still in high school every damn day. Emily storms out, because she has a faculty parking spot and a whistle dammit, which surely makes up for the fact that she is working in a building that literally told her to ACT NORMAL, BITCH. Great job Emily, way to work it through.  I’m not afraid of prison, I watched Orange is the New Black like, 50 times!   Aria is leaving Ezra’s apartment when she runs into a reporter who wants to cover the Ezra/Nicole reunion story. Aria blows him off and tells him that she’s the only fiancée in Ezra’s life. Later, she meets up with Holden and vents while helping him cook for a rehearsal dinner. If this is building to an Aria/Holden romance, I wouldn’t be mad. Back at Rosewood High for Wayward Lesbians, Emily and Paige are going over the swim team roster. Paige apologizes for the heated meeting with Alison, and Emily reminds her that they all have intense and complicated relationships with each other. Emily tells Paige that she fell for her when Paige told her about Ali’s bullying, which isn’t surprising considering Emily pops a savior boner whenever there’s a girl in trouble. Unfortunately, instead of having this conversation in an office, they’re having it in the locker room, where they are overheard by teen Addison Derringer, aka Ali 2.0. This is why you don’t air your dirty lesbian laundry at work, people! I wonder if there’s this much lesbian drama on the field hockey team?   Over at Casa Hastings, Veronica is trying to mend things with Spencer, despite the earth shattering news that she is not her bio-mom. Spencer calls out her dad for avoiding her, and demands to know how much Melissa knew. Veronica tells her that Melissa doesn’t know her whole origin story, and Spencer shouts that a part of her soul will always live in Radley from whence she came. Back at Rosewood High, Alison is assigning homework and teaching, which is bananas considering she spent her high school years wearing masks of other people’s faces and flying planes into the night. Emily shows up to question Addison about skipping practice, but Addison blows her off with some Ali-worthy high school bitchery. When she leaves, Emily and Alison complain about kids today and Ali worries that maybe the baby she’s carrying that’s half her/half Archer will grow up to be a real jerk. Don’t worry Ali, we all know that baby is half Emily, so it will be a shiny-haired rainbow pony. Emily comforts and hugs Ali, while Addison spies on them and takes pictures. Once again guys, save it for the teacher’s lounge. What if my kid is a blackmailing bitch who blinds people with firecrackers?! As long as she has a winsome lesbian BFF with savior issues, she’ll be just fine   Mona breezes into Hanna’s loft with an armful of dresses she scrounged from Hanna’s closet while she was asleep because, you know, Mona gotta Mona. She shows her the dress that Kate flipped for, but Hanna stares at the dress like she owes it money and refuses her. Mona tells her to get over it and loan the damn dress. If this series refuses to end with Hanna and Mona riding off into the sunset together, I’ll accept Hanna and Mona building a fashion empire. Spencer calls Officer Marco and asks him to help her look for Mary Drake, and reveals that she’s her bio-mom. Hanna feverishly works on her dress, and reveals to Caleb that while she designed it, she took copious notes from her former dragon lady boss Claudia. Caleb tells her to ignore her fears and run with her design. I like how everyone on this show has completely forgotten that he spent all of last season banging Spencer. Like…is that ever gonna come up again? We joke about Caleb being a lesbian, but is there anything gayer than dating your exes friends?   Addison goes to Paige and claims that Emily was hitting on her and behaving inappropriately with the other swimmers. She shows Paige the picture of Emily and Ali hugging, and threatens to go to the principal. Paige confronts Emily, who is furious at the false allegations. Paige tries to be supportive, but reminds Emily that she probs shouldn’t be hugging Alison in a classroom. Emily responds that everyone in town knows her history with Ali, which is simultaneously true and completely bananas. I would love a spin-off of Pretty Little Liars that’s just from the perspective of the other townspeople, with the mailman chuckling good-naturedly while Spencer is running around in the background with a shovel. What’s the matter, Addison? Drugs? Teen pregnancy? Roofied cupcakes?   Also, more evidence that Addison is an amateur: that hug is the least incriminating thing Emily has ever done. Didn’t she hear that she killed a guy? Emily is furious, and refuses to be bullied by a queen bee in the very same high school that bullied her. Paige tells her she’ll coach practice tonight and put out any fires. Aria and Holden continue cooking and talking about Ezra and Nicole. Aria sees an article online about the happy couple getting reunited, and has a mini freak-out, but Holden is able to calm her down and remind her that everyone has a past…except for Aria, whose past is inextricably linked to a sexual predator. But look, they’re making tabouleh and having fun! I’m just saying, if we cooked edibles instead of tabbouleh, we’d make SO MUCH more money!   Marco and Spencer are at the police station discussing Mary Drake, when look who comes tap-tap-tapping in? It’s Jenna Marshall, showing up with a sob story about how Noel Kahn forced her to threaten the Liars at gunpoint. Jenna claims that Noel offered her money for new eyeballs, and Spencer is all YOU LIE! Meanwhile, Emily is at the Brew, where Jenna magically materializes with an entourage. I will never not love Jenna slowly walking into a room to a Liars’ horror, so imagine my delight when she does the exact same thing to Hanna and Mona at Radley, only THIS TIME she’s wearing a rip-off of Hanna’s dress. Mona confronts Jenna and demands to know where she got the dress, and Jenna claims that it was a gift. Hanna tells Mona that it’s all part of the game, and Mona is all, “what game?” because the Liars haven’t told her about it. JFC Liars, loop Mona in already! She’s a genius that is always 50 steps ahead of you! I feel like Mona could take one look at that board game and crack it wide open with only the powers of her mind. Someone give this woman a spin-off! Despite multiple dead bodies in the backyard, this is still a seller’s market!   Meanwhile, Spencer tells her mom that she’s not going to work for her anymore, and Veronica reveals that she’s selling the house. Veronica tells Spencer that she loves her and living there with her children was what made it a home, but Spencer continues to give her the cold shoulder. Veronica tells her that all she ever wanted was for Spencer to feel safe, despite Spencer spending her entire adolescence and adult life in mortal danger. Whelp, she tried? JK, not at all. Emily asks Ali for the spare key to Spencer’s barn so she can go and play the board game. Alison is dubious that the evil game will help Emily or give her any answers, but agrees to go along with her. They arrive to find Emily’s game piece has been moved to the high school, and the phone of doom is waiting for her with a video of Addison making out with her boyfriend and smoking pot when she should have been at practice. Thanks A.D.? They see me tappin’, they hatin’   Meanwhile, Caleb and Hanna have followed Jenna to a shoe repair store, where she is assembling the rest of Hanna’s stolen outfit. While Caleb confronts Jenna, Hanna sneaks into the shoe repair shop, which is dark and creepy and empty. Fun fact: Jenna’s DareDevil-like abilities means she can smell the Liars coming from a mile away! She’s like one of those drug sniffing police dogs, except evil. Hanna wanders into a shoe cage (which is a thing?) and ends up getting locked in because of course she does. She’s then threatened by a whirring sander and a swinging wooden shoe form. I mean, it’s no Radley basement, but it’s enough to trigger her PTSD. Caleb finds her and breaks her out of the cage. Emily confronts Addison with the video of her skipping school, and shows her an email that Addison sent to friends confessing her plans to falsely accuse Emily. Addison is carted off to the principal’s office, while Emily gloats over blackmailing a 10th grader. I guess I should be mad, but that kid is an ass. A.D. texts Emily a congrats for embracing her dark side, and gives her another piece of the puzzle. If you look really closely, you can see tiny models of our moms drinking tiny wines!   Emily places the puzzle piece on the board, and Spencer thinks that it might be a map. But a map to where?! What did you think of last night’s episode? Tweet me your big gay feels @ChelseaProcrast   http://dlvr.it/P117cS

[izzyizumi]

┏┓ ┃┃╱╲ In this ┃╱╱╲╲ house ╱╱╭╮╲╲ we love ▔▏┗┛▕▔ & appreciate ╱▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲ Mona Marshall ╱╱┏┳┓╭╮┏┳┓ ╲╲ ▔▏┗┻┛┃┃┗┻┛▕▔

{gif by me} {DO NOT repost please!}

[bellabooks]

“Pretty Little Liars” recap S7 Ep 11: Playtime

Welcome to our coverage of Pretty Little Liars Season 7B! So much has happened since this show last aired: the website I wrote for was invaded by body snatchers, America elected a moldy Cheeto to its highest political office, and I got married. This is some next level darkest timeline stuff! (except for the marriage, that’s been pretty great.) But the world keeps on spinning, the sun rises every morning, and here we are: same bat-time, different bat-channel, ready to tackle the final ten episodes of PLL ever! Are you ready? I’m so freaking ready. Dear Goddess, please let me survive long enough to see him impeached. Previously on PLL, everyone wore masks on masks, Sara Harvey died in a shower from whence she came, Mary Drake revealed she was Spencer’s birth mom, Spencer got shot, Toby drove into a tree, Noel Kahn got hilariously decapitated, and Jenna Marshall got dragged off by A.D. Oh, and Alison’s pregnant and I bet you dollars to donuts that the baby is made with Emily’s hijacked eggs. We pick up right where we left off: Spencer is in an ambulance, being rushed to the hospital. The Liars arrive at the ER just in time to see Toby wheeled by on a gurney. They discuss Noel’s death, and the possibility that A) this whole game is over and B ) Jenna is probably still bumping around in a closet like some poltergeist. Everyone is remarkably calm despite the fact that they saw a severed head bounce down a staircase barely an hour ago. It’s cool, I’m sure they’ll process this all later in a very healthy way. We jump to one week later, where Spencer is already out of the hospital, despite being shot point blank in the chest. Toby is out as well, but Yvonne is in a medically induced coma. Ezra comes home from the jungle after discovering that Nicole is alive, and it’s super awkward with Aria. Haleb is back together and banging up a storm, and Hanna decides it’s time to pursue fashion again now that A.D. is definitely for sure dead. Meanwhile, Rosewood High revealed that they held two photos in their hands, and both Paige and Emily are still in the running to become Rosewood’s Next Top Lesbian P.E. Coach. Emily is now varsity swim coach, and Paige is the athletic supervisor, and Alison is furious that she has to work with Paige. Track suit + Blazer = Lesbian Power Couple Goals The Liars get an SOS text from Spencer, and arrive at her house to find a giant black box with a big bow on it. It’s officially playtime, and A.D. has created the mother of all games: part board game, part diorama, all creepy. This game truly has everything, from dolls of the Liars to an iPhone calling them all bitches. It’s classic PLL nonsense and I am here.for.it. Spencer wants to play the game, but they all decide to leave it alone for now. FOR ONCE can A send us an edible arrangement instead?  Bad News: A.D. is alive. Good News: IT’S A FREE PHONE, BITCHES! Ali continues to give Emily the cold shoulder, as if it’s her fault that the school hired Paige. She complains about being pregnant, broke, and alone, but Emily assures her that she will support her no matter what. There’s no mention of their shared kiss, and it’s awkward as fuck. Hanna works on her sketches, and are the graced with the presence of the one and only Mona Vanderwaal, who looks at her work and immediately starts brewing a plan to launch Hanna’s fashion line. Do you trust me?  I mean, you ran me over with an SUV one time but sure, why not. Spencer meets with Marco the elevator make-out police officer, who tells her that there were two shooters the night she was shot, and that Jenna wasn’t the one who shot her. I’m assuming whoever pulled the trigger is the same person who dragged Jenna’s ass out of the house and tossed her in a van. Despite the Nicole drama, Aria continues her wedding planning, and visits a wedding venue with Hanna in tow. There, she bumps into Holden, the boy who pretended to date her so she could sneak around with Ezra. Other fun things about Holden: he has a heart condition and was in a fight club once! He and Aria catch up, and they go for a walk, where they run into Ezra who has to rush back to New York to see Nicole. Emily is in the teacher’s lounge with adorable older teacher May Horowitz. She sees that Ali and Paige will be on the same committee, and advises May against it. Paige walks in and assures Emily that she’s no threat to Ali, and doesn’t hold a grudge. I’m sure this meeting will go swimmingly.   Mrs. Horowitz, I’m worried about Paige and Ali on the same committee– Oh sweet Emily, look at all the f*&ks I give! Hanna gets dragged to Radley by Mona, who immediately starts fussing with her hair. I love these two together, and I wish there would be a spinoff where they realize how gay they are for each other, and run away to launch a fashion empire in New York. Instead, Mona introduces Hanna to Kate Daily, a prominent socialite/senator’s daughter who wants to wear Hanna’s clothes to an event. Damn, Mona works fast. Meanwhile, Veronica Hastings is finally home from Out Of Town. Wow Hastings family: your daughter is shot point blank in the chest and you decide to roll in a week later? Way harsh, Tai. Spencer confronts her mother about the Mary Drake of it all, and Veronica finally confesses the truth: Peter Hastings met Mary at a bar, where Mary pretended to be Jessica and they boned. So for those of you keeping track, Peter impregnated both Mary Drake AND Jessica DiLaurentis. The 90’s were crazy Spencer, people were stealing babies from asylums on the regs! Shockingly, instead of dumping him, Veronica decides to take pity on this poor baby born to a crazy woman, and we see a flashback of her picking up baby Spencer from Radley. Apparently Judge Kahn helped make the arrangements, and no one was ever the wiser. Spencer realizes her life has been a lie, and storms off to the barn to get seriously wine drunk. Hanna and Kate are going through some dress options at Lucas’s penthouse, where Kate assumes that Mona is Hanna’s boss. Hanna flips out, because no one is the boss of her, and angrily calls up Mona, who assures her it was just a misunderstanding: because of her brilliance and air of authority, everyone assumes she’s the boss of everything. I mean…she’s not wrong though? Hyperadrenalized reality is a hell of drug. Back at the Rosewood High Committee of Lesbian Drama, Ali is on full on queen bee bitch mode. She needles Paige about her high school aggression, and Paige dishes it right back. Emily yells at them both to cut it out, while poor Mrs. Horowitz just wants to talk about the bake sale. Who knew that working with two exes at a high school that tried to murder me would be so hard?!   Ugh, if I wanted to deal with this kind of dyke drama I would have joined the math department!   Spencer gets day drunk and decides to play the big bad board game. She turns on the game phone, which tells her to pick Truth or Dare. Spencer picks dare, and the game tells her to go visit Toby. She visits Toby at the hospital, and they talk about the cursed town of Rosewood. Spencer mentions that maybe the town must disappear before it will let them leave, which in my mind is setting up a massive town explosion a la the Buffy series finale. As far as series enders go, I would be down for the Liars joining forces to burn Rosewood to the ground. Emily confronts Ali about her behavior, and calls her out for reverting to her high school mean girl self. She tells Ali that this is the part of her that she hates: the part that pushes anyone away who tries to get too close. Ali tells her that she pushes people away because they are constantly trying to murder her with a shovel, bury her alive, chase her across Pennsylvania, marry her, knock her up, and lock her in a mental hospital. I mean, fair enough. Emily asks her if their kiss was real or just a ploy to keep Emily close, and Ali says she doesn’t know. Emily tells her not to kiss her again until she figures her it out. After seven seasons, is Emily finally growing a backbone when it comes to Ali? Let’s hope so. Why don’t you go back to Sabrina?! Because I forgot I was dating her!   Spencer returns to the board game, which spits out a prize for her: the letter that Mary Drake wrote to her unborn baby and a puzzle piece. Spencer places the puzzle piece on the center of the board, and reads the letter. Mary asks her baby for forgiveness, and tells her that despite coming from a hateful act, she is not hateful. Spencer falls asleep and Veronica finds her and tucks her in. It’s a time share in Orlando!!! Emily finds Paige in the teacher’s lounge, where she promises that Ali will apologize. Paige is less concerned about an apology, and more concerned about Emily continually defending Alison. Paige reminds her that Ali always plays the victim, and that it isn’t Emily’s job to rescue her. It’s a vicious pattern that Emily and Alison keep repeating, and Paige is calling it out for what it is in a way that no other Liar has ever done. Well done, Paige. I hope this show treats you right, but I’m not holding my breath. The Liars confront Spencer about starting the game without them, and Spencer makes a joke about being a bastard which, LOL. Hanna is ready to grab a crowbar and dismantle the game, but of course the game phone turns on and plays an incriminating video of the Liars digging up Rollins’ grave. Whelp, they’re in it now. I don’t know guys, maybe just let Hanna stab it a little and see what happens We cut to Jenna sitting in a black room, drinking tea from someone in scrubs and surgical gloves, presumably A.D. They drop a binder full of braille in Jenna’s lap that details the end game plan, and Jenna reads it and smiles. What did you think of the first episode back? Who do you think is A.D.? My money is on Lucas or Charlotte’s birth dad, whoever that may be. Tweet me your PLL feels at @ChelseaProcrast and share your conspiracy theories with me! http://dlvr.it/NxJrk0