#in my vampire weekend era again

[zionvalley]

changed my main blog url- likes and replies are now from @mansardroof

[xanticore]

𝐔𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑

Genre: fluff

Note: this is my first metallica fic so pleaseee keep that in mind. I hope whoever reads this enjoys.

Setting: late 90s ~ early 2000s..ish

Summary: Kirk is on tour and he decides to stop by the local guitar store. He ends up staying longer than expected when he overhears a riff that sounded impressive. Assuming it was a guy, but was taken aback when it was a girl...a girl who doesn't seem to know who he is.

It was the weekend and I was starting my weekend off, our next show being on Thursday and Friday of next week. This gave me time to myself to find local comic stores and guitar shops. I was honestly in my own little world as time passed by quickly; I didn't mind at all because I was going to do the whole process again on Sunday. I left the comic book store with a new manga and some new released volumes. All Junji Ito works, no surprise there.

The next stop of the day was the guitar shop. The air was cool and the store was just so fucking huge, It was heaven to me. The store had a variety of items. Vinlys, cassettes, cds, and even some band posters...but my main focus was the guitar wall. All different types of styles and colors, different collaborations of pop culture, anything you could think of-this store probably had it.

A guitar that has been newly stock was the black and red Les Paul. It looked so gothic and vampiric. Younger me was just screaming at me to get it...which It was my plan. I asked a worker to take it off the shelf so I could practice some riffs on it. Just as I imagine; it was a smooth and crisp sound. A sound I was looking feel and I probably would make this guitar debut when I head to Japan.

It was already 5 pm and James was just blowing up my phone. I forgot all about our band dinner. I sighed packing up my things and unhooked the guitar from the amp. On my way towards the front to ring up my guitar, I overheard a riff coming from a room that was being occupied. It looked like it was a guitar lesson in session.

I continued to listen and soon heard a solo. It was definitely in the metal genre. Whoever that dude was; shredding that guitar like it was the last thing on earth. It intimidated me how good it sounded. Almost making me jealous of how I didn't think to use this type of style in a song.

I heard them stop and minor shuffling going on in the room. I quickly walked away and acted like I was looking at the vinyls. I glanced over at the door and saw a tall beautiful girl. She nearly took my breath away. The way she played really matched her style of clothing. She was a goth but it was familiar style I've seen in Japan. Her hair was dyed a dark red and her make up was flawless.

I needed to compliment her and asked her about that solo of hers. I was stupidly stuck in my place but managed to get to her with a sudden boost of confidence. "H-Hey, nice guitar. I heard you playing in that room. You sounded amazing." I complimented her with a smile in admiration.

She smiled back and looked somewhat excited. Did she recognize me? Did she not expect a guitarist from the most known metal band of all time-

"Thank you so much! Are you also a fan of Malice Mizer? I was playing one of their songs."

"Malice Mizer? never heard of them.."

The girl frowned but soon lit up when she started to explain the band to me. "It's a rock band from Japan. Visual Kei style of music over there. I'm really into bands like X Japan and Dir En Grey."

I've never heard any X Japan songs but I definitely seen posters of them in Shibuya. I know they are well loved and idolized in the era of rock music over there.

"There's actually a Malice Mizer cassette next to you of their new album. You should buy it and give them a listen? They won't disappoint." She giggled. I eyed her movements when she moved closer to me, only to pick up the packaged cassette tape. The cover had a silver cross and the band's name in black in the middle. But enough about them, her little giggle was just so cute. If only I could hear that from her more often.

"I'm Kirk."

"(name)"

A beautiful name as well. I didn't want to add anymore details of my name because I knew it wouldn't matter and honestly...i'm really enjoying that. It felt more natural to speak with a non fan. Nothing was forced and she genuinely seemed to enjoy just talking about her favorite music; unlike some girls i'd meet at clubs.

"Well Kirk, I hope to see you around?"

I didn't say a word but I just nodded. I tried to stay positive but it was a pain I wasn't gonna see her again. I bought my guitar and cassette watching the cashier put it in a case. I left the store happy and somewhat sad, but, seeing that girl smile just brighten up my mood...

I hope to see her again.

a/n: so what we thinking?? yay or nay?

gif from: @ba11ltongue

dividers: cr to owners

[itsharleystuff]

↳ II. 𝘍𝘐𝘓𝘓 𝘛𝘏𝘌 𝘝𝘖𝘐𝘋

Read part one here.

— 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: dbf!Joel Miller x afab!fem reader (no outbreak au).

— 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 10.6k (once again, I’m sorry)

— 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: after your steamy encounter with Joel during your homecoming party, things between you have been stagnant. Although, fate seems to be on your side when both Sarah and your dad have to leave town for a short while.

— 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: 18+ content (minors dni!), sex, p in v sex, Joel hits it from behind, blowjobs, some teasing, a bit of spanking, pet names (darling, sweetheart, honey), unprotected sex (pls do not attempt), cum eating, taking nsfw photos, Joel tries to be dom but fails, age gap (reader is twenty four, Joel is late forties), reader is kind of a brat, fluff and feelings (yes, this is a warning), alcohol consumption, brief mention of family death. Barely edited, sorryyy. No use of y/n.

—A/N: this can be read as a stand-alone but I suggest reading the previous part for a better understanding. Btw, there’s a couple of Easter eggs from the game in this! Also— I tried making a moodboard and I’m not sure how I feel about it. I’ll probably stick to gifs in the future, lol.

“I like Indiana Jones," you babble, taking a sip from your coffee without looking at anyone in specific. "I was twelve and in love with Harrison Ford..."

"Okay, so that's one movie we're definitely not going to watch." Sarah chimes in, lazily chewing on her scrambled eggs. "How do you feel about Robert Pattinson?"

"That depends," you reply, moving your head side to side in a contemplative manner, "are we talking twilight or Harry Potter?"

You hear your dad snort on the other side of the table and see Joel chuckling beside him. Sarah crosses both arms over her chest and raises a brow at them. “What's so funny?"

"Nothing," your dad clears his throat and side-eyes his friend. "Just thought you two were a bit old for those crappy vampire movies. Maybe watch-"

"Forgive me, but I don't think it's a good idea to take recommendations from either of you," you cut him off, leaning back on your chair. "You're both obsessed with die hard, think The Godfather is incredibly complex and in your spare time watch construction programs. We'll be fine on our own."

"Touché..."

It's been three weeks since your homecoming party, and ever since then it has become a habit to have breakfast together every weekend. Today, Saturday, it was the Miller's turn to cook, which consequently had you and your father sitting at their table. As of now, you and Sarah were discussing your movie night, which had to be postponed due to her road-trip to San Antonio— apparently, she and her friend Ellie were going to visit some college campuses there.

It's also been three weeks since that little, hot encounter you and Joel had in your kitchen. And, contrary to your better judgement, both of you were more than eager to spend some extra time alone. Things since then had been uneasy, specially when being surrounded by others; always worried that someone might notice those stolen looks you'd share or sense the palpable tension that rose when you would stand too close to each other.

You try not to think about it. Except when you do. A swirl of memories would come flooding your mind in the most inappropriate moments, creating that heat that made you remember exactly how his fingers felt inside you, his tongue between your folds, the sloppy kisses and that feral, hungry look in his eyes while eating you out, touching you like you were the most precious thing on earth.

"How about pride and prejudice?" the girl wonders, standing up to clean her dishes and snapping you back to reality.

"Shit, I love period dramas!" your dad shoots you a reproachful glare at your language, but you chose to ignore it. "As a matter of fact, most of my designs are inspired by the Victorian and regency eras."

"Oh, yeah," Sarah recalls, "I remember I read about it in one of your blogs. Dad showed it to me, by the way..." Joel clears his throat loudly, making her giggle.

Although she had mentioned it before, it was still kind of weird that he acknowledged your work. At first you thought it was merely because he wanted to connect with you somehow, but lately he'd been asking if he could see your new sketches and would let you borrow some old magazines he had around the house. Your best friend, Sophie, mentioned he might've been trying to show his interest in you subconsciously. And she was that one psychic friend who believed in zodiac signs and angel numbers, so you decided to believe her.

In that moment, your dad receives an incoming call on his cellphone; he excuses himself and heads to the living room. Your eyes lock with Joel's, and the fact that he was uninhibitedly staring back at you drew a smug smile on your face.

"Are you interested in fashion, Mr. Miller?" he sulks out a dry 'no', but you could see him fidget with his watch nervously. "Pity. I thought maybe you could model some of my male designs."

Sarah genuinely cracks up at your comment, slapping one hand on the table. "You want dad to pose for you? Seriously?"

"Why not? I brought my Polaroid camera, I can get some very nice shots." You were partially joking, but deep down you just wanted to see how he'd react.

"I mean, I know dad's got his charm with women, or so they keep saying-"

"No way anyone says that," he rambles.

"But the idea of him modeling is probably the funniest thing I've ever heard."

The fact was that you didn't want to take pictures of him so anyone else could see them. You wanted them exclusively for yourself. A couple of naughty Polaroids to keep around for whenever you were aching for him —which has been nearly every fucking night since your arrival—.

"It was a silly idea," you finally agree, shrugging. Joel stands to take his things to the sink. "Do you really have to leave for the weekend? You're like, my only friend here."

"Uh, about that..." she leans in towards you and you can practically smell a scheme on her. "Would you be mad if I gave your number to someone?"

You can quite literally feel the man standing behind you tense up. "Huh?"

"Yeah, like... To a guy." She moves in her place, but there's still no answer from you. "He's my English teacher. His name is Will and he's super smart, young, really funny and very handsome, I might add. I believe he can be your new male model." Sarah adds that last bit with a grin.

When you turn your head to see Joel, there was a deep scowl etching on his face, his body remaining still as a stone.

"I don't know... As friends, maybe." You weren't sure why, but the idea of meeting anyone new didn't really sound appealing.

She opened her mouth to say something but before she could actually do so, your dad walked in again. He appeared upset, gesturing nonsense and muttering impassively.

"What's wrong?" your tone comes out concerned.

"I have a meeting in Boston," he sighed, resting a hand on your shoulder apologetically. "Apparently it's urgent and I have to catch the next flight if I want to be there by nightfall."

"Oh, don't worry," you smile at him warmly. "I understand. Besides, I'm an adult. I can manage a weekend by myself."

He nods, still seemingly aloof. "I know but- I just wanted to spend some more time with you."

And of course you wanted that too, but saying it out loud could literally bring him to quit his job. He was always very extreme when it came down to you.

"What time d’you leave?" his friend asks him.

"Half past four. Why?"

"I can drop Sarah off at Ellie's and then drive you to the airport, if you'd like." Such a caring friend, Joel Miller. So selfless. Helping your dad out, attending his daughter's every special need...

"Yeah, thanks a lot, man. Take care of my little girl while I'm away."

You see his eyes gleam with a mix of unknown emotions, "Will do."

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

The last few days had been no less than torment for Joel. Each moment that went by in which he didn't get a chance to be near you had him losing his mind. Badly. And it wasn't necessarily a physical thing— not always, at least.

Every morning, he would wake up and go to work, knowing for certain that when he comes back home he'll find you hanging around with Sarah or sitting out on your porch with a sketching notebook on your lap.

He liked to guess what you'd be doing.

Would you be playing board games with his daughter? Watching a movie or baking desserts? Maybe you were thrift shopping with your dad or simply going to the mall. And later on, when he finally gets to see you again, you'd tell him all about it.

Joel also liked to imagine what kind of clothes you'd be wearing. One thing he noticed is that you never stick to one particular style or aesthetic. One day you could be wearing pastel sundresses with ribbons in your hair; the next one could be long, black skirts paired with basic tank tops and multiple necklaces, or even something more extravagant, depending on your mood.

Seeing you was an experience— one that he could never get tired of. It's like every time he sets his eyes on you there's a certain color palette that changes constantly, or the feeling of gathering all your favorite songs into one playlist and then hitting the shuffle button. He never knows what to expect. Hence why he had given up on trying to relate you to the silly things around; like seasons, animals, artists or foods. Instead, he started associating you with feelings.

You were creative, unique and incredibly fearless. In a way, you made him feel uneasy, excited, thrilled, confident and many more emotions at the same time. If he had to describe you in one word, he'd say evoking.

Oh, how you pestered his brain.

He hated how much he thought about you, and how little guilt he felt from it.

Right now he was sitting on the drivers seat of his truck, waiting at the airport's parking lot. You asked him if you could walk your dad to his corresponding gate and he agreed. The downside: it had started to rain, probably not too bad for your dad's flight to be delayed but enough for your clothes to get soaked on your way back.

"Shit, I'm sorry," you muttered, shutting the passenger's door behind you. “The seats are gonna get all wet..."

"Here," Joel takes off his jacket to place it over your shoulders.

It feels warm and it smells like him, "Thanks."

He starts the car without saying anything else, keeping his eyes glued to the road. You, on the other hand, could not stop staring at him. Now that no one else was around, there was no shame in admiring his side profile, the way his muscles flexed and his hands grasped the wheel. There was something inherently attractive about men driving, but- Jesus... This image had your mind roaming around dark places.

Suddenly, realization sinks in— you're alone.

Alone with him.

"I, uh..." he taps the wheel with his thumb, still avoiding your gaze. "I wanted to take you out for dinner. The weather kinda ruined it."

The corners of your mouth hitch up in a silly smile. "Too bad. I really didn't want to be alone tonight."

Joel hums, appearing somewhat distraught. In reality, he was fighting for his life. The clothes you chose to wear today were not fitted for the rain; denim mini-skirt, high pair of boots and a white top that complimented your upper body. He tried not to look at the raindrops rolling down your thighs or note how transparent your shirt has become, forcing himself to stare at your hands and the many rings that decorated your fingers, seeing there the one he gifted you.

"How about you come over to my place?" you suggest, trying to catch his attention. "I'll need a shower and a change of clothes but... Maybe we can do something afterwards."

His tongue darts out to lick his lips, still avoiding your gaze, "Like what?"

This time your voice goes lower, a smirk spreads across your face and something in your eyes flickers; a darker, sensual spark.

"Oh, you know..." your hand carefully comes to rest on his knee. His thigh tenses but he doesn't say or do anything to push you away. "Whatever you want."

He swallows hard, feeling the pads of your fingers run circles on his leg, your nails mildly scratching over the jeans in a way that raises goosebumps on his skin and eases his nerves.

"I've got a better idea," he says, keeping his tone calm —barely—. "Why don't you come to my house instead?"

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise, "Sure, but- what about my clothes?"

And then he smiles cockily, as if this had been his plan all along, "Wear mine."

Well, there was absolutely no way you were going to turn him down. With a bit more boldness, you slide your hand a few inches up his inner thigh, still rubbing soothing patterns. His jaw clenched, but remained silent and apparently unbothered.

"Joel?" his name rolled off your tongue sweetly, in a way only you knew how to. He uttered a 'hm?' in retort. "Did you miss me?"

"I've seen you nearly every day," he answers playfully.

You laugh, stopping your movements and simply resting your palm there. "So... No?"

"Didn't say that, darlin'." The truck suddenly stops at a red light as he exhales heavily, giving in to you at last. "But I'll let you guess."

A push and pull game, like a cat chasing a mouse. Your smirk widens. "I don't think so. Not as much as I have."

His eyes scan your body from head to toe, the way you sit with your legs slightly parted, back laying flat against the seat and face turned towards him with heated cheeks and low gaze. Unexpectedly, your hand draws back from his lap as you start looking through your purse and a frown forms on his face, baffled by the loss of contact.

"Which is why..." you take the Polaroid camera out and see a whole shift in his eyes, like he's about to burst in laughter. "I brought this."

"No," despite his categorical denial, you still held the object up.

"You have a green light," he curses under his breath and you hold back a chuckle. "Just let me have one, please."

He sighs in defeat, "Why'd you want that?"

The rain had started to settle down but the air was still pretty cold, all that could be heard besides your own voices being the drops that crashed against the car.

"Cause you're handsome," he rolls his eyes sarcastically. "And I like you."

Hell, you were always so straightforward. It made his heart jump inside his chest, wondering if it was gonna burst out.

"You won't like me as much once you meet that Will dude," Joel prattles through gritted teeth, remembering his daughter's suggestion from earlier.

"The guy Sarah mentioned?" your brows furrow subtly. "Why? What's up with him?"

He yanks his head to the side, glancing over at you for a second, "Nothin'. Just thinkin' out loud." In spite of your puzzled expression, he decides to grant your wish. "I'll let ya' take it. But only if I get one in return."

Your lips purse in a smile, "As many as you like, Miller."

He doesn't say anything in response, but his grin doesn’t fade either and you managed to capture it on paper. The image slowly started to become visible and your first thought was how well it captured the whole 'Joel Miller' essence. It was a simple photo of him driving with one hand on the wheel and the other arm thrown lazily over the backseat. That denim shirt hugged his arms exquisitely, the rolled-up sleeves adding to his appeal. He was looking at you when it was taken, so you could see more than half his face— and the way he was grinning, you couldn't help but think he appeared so much younger when he did that. The entire thing felt so much like him: snuggly, blue, genuine and you absolutely loved it.

"There," you show it to him as he started to pull over. "Isn't it nice?"

"Just keep it to yourself, aight?" the man grumbles.

"F'course," with a spark of joy, you slide the photo inside your wallet. "Wouldn't want anyone else peeking at that gorgeous smile of yours. That's a treasure of my own."

"Shut up-" he rumbled, turning his face the other way and opening the door, seemingly flustered. And out of all the amazing things you've accomplished in your life, making this rugged looking man blush was probably your greatest pride.

When he helps you out of the car, holding your hand firmly and cleaving to your waist; you wanted nothing more than to kiss him under the pouring rain, wildly and unhinged, just like last time. But this particular spot possibly had too many curious eyes of which you were unaware of. He obviously doesn't need to guide you through his house, since you already know nearly every corner of it, except for one. His bedroom. And apparently, that's the precise location he's taking you to.

"Please excuse the mess," he says, placing one hand on the door handle, "I haven't had a woman in here for ages, so I'm afraid I probably won't live up to your expectations."

"Joel," you snort, "it's been a decade and a half since you last dated anyone. Trust me, my expectations are pretty low."

He scowls, squinting both eyes. "You didn't have to say it like that..."

It's honestly better than you thought. His bed is nicely done, brown bedsheets striking as warm and welcoming; the walls were painted a pretty, light shade of blue that matched the grayish curtains on the left. The drawers in front of his windows had a bunch of stuff scattered on top of them: a CD player along with a few music discs, some papers, a cap and a pair of reading glasses, batteries, one screwdriver and a framed picture of him and Sarah at the beach. Meanwhile, the nightstand simply had one lamp and an alarm-clock on it. Over the bed's headboard were one poster of a music festival, the image of a landscape and an advert of what you guessed must've been a club, that read 'tacos and beer" on it. The door to the bathroom was on the right.

Messy, yet tidy at the same time. Very Joel-like.

"No way..." you murmur, eyeing the guitar beside his bed. "All this time I thought it was a myth."

"What?" he asks from behind you.

"Dad told me you used to serenade girls back in college and that you wanted to become a singer." A giggle escapes your lips, unable to contain it. "I remember saying he was surely making it up, but..."

"I didn't- I mean..." he clears his throat, scratching the back of his neck and feeling his chest swell with your laughter. "Oh, shut up!"

"Make me." The lingering, mischievous smile on your face made his heart pound and blood rush. "Come on, Miller. Shut me up, I dare you."

His eyes darken, but you don't falter for a second. He doesn't move a muscle, solely watching as you took off his jacket and threw it to the bed.

"You dare me?" his voice goes drops an octave, following your every move closely. "That's rather bold of you, sweetheart."

"Mhm," without breaking eye contact, you start taking off your boots. "And yet you're doing nothing about it."

Joel starts walking towards you slowly, holding your gaze intently. Your hair was damp and your clothes were still wet; it didn't really matter that the air was chilly cause you still felt warm all over. He soon invades your space, cupping your chin in his big hand and lifting your head upwards.

"Well, you're awfully quiet now, aren't ya'?" his hot breath fanned across your cheeks, the gap between your faces being basically invisible.

"I'm just waiting for you to start singing some random song by Alabama or Johnny Cash," you scoff. "Like a good ol' Texan ma-"

He doesn't let you finish the sentence, abruptly crashing his lips into your own. Joel isn't delicate about it and the fervor with which he kisses you makes your body stumble a few steps backwards. Your shoulders hit the wall and he pins you against it as your mouths find a way to mold perfectly, at a much nicer pace than last time. You throw your hands around his neck and let your fingers tangle in the curls around his nape, tasting the fresh mint on his lips. His hands rest on your hips, chests pressed together as the temperature kept rising with each second that went on.

You part your lips in order to grant him deeper access, feeling his tongue slide past your teeth and meeting your own in an ardent, heated way. It was perfect, until he broke apart, looking down at you with an asserted confidence.

"You really know nothing 'bout country music," he says in between shaky breaths, beaming. "S'that what you wanted?"

"Yes," you manage to say.

"Then say 'thank you'," Joel indicates petulantly, stroking your bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. "Go on, don't be such a brat."

You blink twice, your brain still buzzing with the sensation of mouth on you, barely capable of processing anything else. "But I want more..."

"You'll take what I give you."

Shit, when he said it like that- "Thank you."

"That's my girl," he straightened his back, opening the door next to you. "Now, get your pretty ass in the shower before you catch a cold, 'kay?" You roll your eyes and hear him chuckle. "There's clean towers under the sink. You can take some clothes from my drawers, or Sarah's if you feel like it. I don't think she'll mind."

"Understood." He can tell you're annoyed, which he finds funny.

"Don't be mad at me, angel." Joel tugs a strand of hair behind your ear. "Promise I'll make it up to you."

You nod distractedly, lost in the cocky spark on his eyes. "I'm not mad. Just hoping you fuck me real good if you're making me wait for it."

Your words almost make him choke on his own saliva. "Sweetheart, you're making it real hard for me to be a gentleman."

It makes your ego boost, in a sense. "I'll be quick. Can you get something for dinner, though? I'm starving."

"Shit, darlin', pick a struggle," he mocks as you enter the bathroom, "are you horny or hungry?"

"Oh, you jerk!"

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

6:15 pm.

You take a quick glance at Joel's alarm clock once you come out of the shower. It's been little more than an hour since your dad's plane took off. You hope the rain hadn’t made his flight any difficult, cause the weather turned out to be quite a blessing for you.

The cozy feeling of a nice, warm shower after being soaked under the rain was starting to settle in your bones, making your limbs relax. Then you realize, you smell like Joel. The scent of his soap, his shampoo, even his laundry detergent, is all over you. It's intoxicating in the most fantastic way possible, making your insides burn with a thrill of excitement. You took one on his flannels, —dark green with red stripes— and decided to wear it without anything besides your underwear. It was pretty big anyway, and covered just the necessary areas.

You slid your socks back on when all of the sudden you hear the faint sound of music from the floor beneath. Curious, you walk towards the noise, finding out Joel was in the kitchen, crouched down in front of the opened fridge. The CD player that you saw earlier on his room was now on the table, playing a melody that you recognized almost immediately.

"I like this song," you say, leaning against the wall. "That's Billy Idol, isn't it?"

"Yeah," he recalls, taking out a medium sized plastic box from the fridge. "Tommy made that mix. There's plenty of hits from past decades. I think you'll enjoy it."

The man finally turns around to face you and his face fails to hide his surprise. The way his prying eyes sweep your body in detail, taking his time particularly on your bare thighs, almost made you feel self-conscious if it weren't for that shadow of desire that crossed his eyes and the way his nostrils flared from a contained breath.

"How is he, by the way?" you ask, still on the subject. "Haven't seen him in a while."

"Who?" he clearly forgot what he had just said.

"Your brother," you call to mind, "how is he?"

Joel sets the box down on the table and drifts his gaze back to your face. "Fine, I guess. Last time we spoke he said he'd go to Dallas." He takes two glasses from the pantry and what it looks like a bottle of wine. "I-uh... There isn't any real food in here besides those strawberries and chocolates that this guy brought for Sarah. Should I order something?"

You shake your head and walk over to him, "This will do. Won't she get mad if we eat them, though?"

"Don't think so," he replies, pouring the red liquid into the glasses. "I'll blame you if she does."

"Oh, okay-" you cock an eyebrow at him and hold back a giggle. "Thought you didn't like wine."

"It's a fancy drink," he explains, "s'only for special occasions."

"Oh?" you take a sip from it, eyes boring into his. "And what's tonight's?"

Joel smiles conceitedly, jutting his chin out. "I've got you all to myself."

You snort, feeling the heat soar across your cheeks. He takes the snack box and with a sly gesture asks you to follow him into the living room, the melodic sound of the eighties tune turning to background noise as you do. The only lights on are the ones in the kitchen and the lamps beside the couch, shining a perfect light on his features.

"Come here," he calls, the leather squealing under his weight when he sat down. You set the glass down on the coffee table in front of the tv, going to sit next to him. "No, sweetheart," he grabs your waist and pulls you closer to him. "I meant here."

His legs part slightly, making room for you to sit on his lap. Your smile broadened toward a soft chuckle, settling yourself on his thigh. Joel immediately gets his hands on you, one on your lower back and the other merely resting on your upper leg.

"So, who's this mystery man that's been giving gifts to your darling daughter?" he scoffs in response, reaching for a chocolate from the box.

"Honestly? No fuckin' clue." You hum in surprise, drinking from your wine. "She never involves with them, thank god, and once they meet me they never come by again."

"I see,” you muse, “you're the overprotective type," you bite on a strawberry next.

"I wouldn't say it like that..." he sees the sarcastic glimpse on your expression and holds back laughter. "It's a dad reflex, I can't control it."

"Right, sounds convincing."

You stretch your arm behind the couch, setting your elbow and laying the side of your face on your palm. His face is very close to yours but all you do is simply stare at each other; Joel's big brown eyes glimmer with infatuation. “Can I ask you a question, sweetheart?" he asks lowly. "Somethin' more serious."

You wince in confusion, but still nod, "Sure."

He inhales sharply, taking a couple of seconds to actually say what he meant to. “Why are you here?" your frown deepens at his words. "I mean- Texas. I know you said you wanted to make up for the lost time with your old man, but... I feel like there's something else you're not saying."

It takes a minute for you to really sink in on his question. You nearly gulp down the alcohol before setting the glass down, avoiding his ardent gaze.

"Honestly?" you sigh, "There's so much to unpack that I don't even know where to start."

"Try." Although he didn't sound harsh, the effort he was asking you to put in wasn't something of your liking.

"Well, first of all," you meditate, clearing your throat, "the city didn't feel like home since my mom passed. It made me realize how much I missed here." He nods comprehensively, caressing the exposed skin of your thigh in a reassuring manner. "And then there's this- fear. Yeah, I guess it is fear... I've managed to accomplish so much in such short time that it actually fucking scares me to go any further and see that-" you stop, sighing and shaking your head. "That I've reached my limit."

For a moment, there's just silence floating between you, all that could be heard were the rain and a song by tears for fears.

"Darlin', look at me," he asks softly but you can't bring yourself to do it, embarrassed by your confession. "Please, let me see those pretty eyes of yours."

And it's practically impossible for you to deny him anything. Specially when he asks so nicely, when his hand grabs the side of your face so gently— you give in, just like that.

"You're afraid to succeed because you don't know what to do with yourself afterwards. Is that it?" You nod faintly. "Can I speak frankly?"

"I have a feeling you will anyway-"

"Yeah. A bit of tough love, but you need’a hear it." Joel strokes your cheek sweetly and you get shivers from the affection in the action. "Sweetheart, I know what you're going through. Shit feels like it's either moving too fast or not moving at all. And I know how scary that is. Trust me, there's still plenty of time for you."

You square your eyes to his, "Sure, bet you were frightened when you were twenty four."

"Terrified," he spoke truthfully. "Everyone I knew was getting married, moving out or working their asses off."

"And you?" he grunts, taking a strawberry from the box. "What were you doing?" Joel eats the fruit patiently, simply staring at you silently. "Come ooon, don't play hard to get."

"Gotta promise you won't laugh."

It's a tricky business for someone who makes fun of everything, and yet you simply reply: "I swear."

"Fine," he rasps out in fake annoyance. "I used to make my own guitars and- sell 'em sometimes. I'd also teach guitar lessons and horseback riding."

Your eyes widen in surprise and something flutters in your stomach. "Shit, that's actually pretty cool!"

He groans, rolling his eyes at the same time, "I told you not to make fun of me."

"No, no- I mean it." You shuffle on his lap, resting a hand on his chest. "And you sound passionate about it... Why'd you stop?"

The man shrugs his shoulders, tightening his grip on your waist. "It went well for a couple years but I eventually had to get something more solid. More so after Sarah was born." He takes a deep breath in, the smell of his own shampoo on your hair hitting his nostrils and catching him off-guard.

"You should teach me," you suggest with a smug grin. "I always wanted to learn."

"What, guitar or horseback riding?" he wonders, suddenly nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck.

"Guitar. I'm pretty good at riding, if you must know." You feel him chuckle against your body, his facial hair scratching your sensitive skin.

"We'll see 'bout that," his voice comes out husky as he starts kissing along your jawline.

Joel's common sense jumped out the window long ago, but the string of self control that kept him sane all this time couldn't bear the weight of you wriggling on top of him, semi-naked and with his scent all over you. Something primal took over him, a glimpse of possessiveness that he didn't believe himself capable of feeling towards you specifically. He wanted you to wear that flannel around town so people would look at you and know who it belonged to; whose bed you've been visiting. He wanted you to smell of his cologne so other men would know that you weren't free for them.

Your fingers run through his soft curls, messing his hair while he grabs the back of your thighs and manhandles you onto straddling his lap. He nips and licks over all your vulnerable areas, making your breathing start to labour. How could he possibly know this well the easiest ways to have you so desperate this quick? Leaning into his touch, yearning for him even with the smallest action? He wasn't aware of the answer himself, he just knew.

Joel instinctively throws his head back when you tug at his hair and seize the opportunity to duck down and lay a sweet kiss on his forehead. His hands coast up your thighs, splaying his fingers on your ass to squeeze the flesh. You hold back a giggle, kissing the curve of his nose before catching his soft, soft lips on yours.

He slides an arm around your waist, pressing his palm between your shoulder blades to keep you as close as possible. You feel your nipples harden when his tongue ran along your bottom lip— tauntingly slow, until you allowed him full access to your mouth, letting him taste the sweet mixture of wine and strawberries on your tongue. But his vehemence didn't make you any less eager, kissing him back with just as much passion and vigor, sinking your teeth into his bottom lip and mildly pulling at it with minor strength.

The action ignites a fire within him, seeing you on top, feeling your fingers roam around his cheekbones and along his jawline like you knew just how much fucking power you had over him... It was a new sensation, a new kind of desire he didn't recognize at first.

Joel's lips were swollen and his own excitement was starting to feel evident underneath you, which created a blunt ache between your legs. He usually appeared so big and mean, with those broad shoulders and permanent scowl on his face. Now, though... He seemed like he'd let you do just about anything with him, to him— it didn't really matter as long as you kept staring at him like that; through heavy lids, eyes sparkling with a profound, desperate need that spoke without words, saying 'only you get to see this side of me'.

You start grinding your hips against his, rubbing your clothed core above his growing boner in small, calculated circles as you shore yourself up with a hand to his chest. He merely admired you from his position, letting you have your way with him; all the while his gaze reflected patience, like he could take over the situation any second but enjoyed watching you lead.

"Joel," you call his name, leaning forward to kiss his chin, moving your lips all the way down his throat and feeling the nice scratch of his beard. Your hands grab the collar of his shirt as you come up to whisper in his ear: "Stay still."

Panting, he narrows his eyes in confusion, "What?" Though you don't give him enough time to figure out your words, getting back on your feet and parting his legs further with a light thump of your knee.

He observes your every move quietly, amused by your confidence and determination when you drop to your knees in front of him. Joel's cocky expression doesn't sway, not even when you drag your nails across his inner thigh, inching closer towards his very visible hard on. However, his body betrays him, selling a whole different story. His muscles tense, his jaw clenches and his Adam's apple bobbed up and down.

"Stop being such a fucking tease," he hissed, refusing to place his hands on you.

"Or what?" you drawl, coming to rest your palm on his crotch. A simple, feathery touch that made his pulse accelerate.

"You'll regret it," he warns grimly.

"S'that so?" you start to unbuckle his belt, way too slow for his liking, tugging down the zipper of his jeans. "I think I can handle it."

He smirked, his hand slithers to the back of your scalp and forces you to lock eyes with him. "Don't test your luck, sweetheart."

You pout mockingly, doing exactly the opposite of what he was saying while dragging down the fabric just enough to free his cock. Your new found courage falters for a second, finally seeing him in all his size and girth. He was, by all means, a big one, the amount of precome oozing on the tip telling you just how much he loved being teased, despite whatever words came out of his mouth. The mere sight of it sent a new heated wave of slick between your thighs.

Joel mimicked your expression scornfully, brushing his thumb across your cheekbone, "Too big for ya'?"

"None of that," you wrap your hand around the base, not really applying any pressure; though the sole warmth of your touch was enough to give him goosebumps, "we'll make it fit."

"That's my girl."

With a chuckle, you lower your head to kiss the inside of his thigh, the pads of your fingers softly grazing the veins on his length. His whole body shudders, leaking onto your hand and letting out a subtle gasp as you spread kisses all along his shaft. Your eyes peer into his soul when you gently place your lips to the slit, tasting the salty precome as he calls your name in what resembles a desperate plea. In a swift move, you finally take the tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around it and deciding to put an end to his suffering. He mutters a gruff 'fuck' when you attempt to take him farther, pumping what you couldn't yet fit and snaking your free hand under the hem of his denim shirt to caress the soft skin of his belly.

"Shit, darlin'-" you feel the heaviness of his palm simply resting on the back of your head, not pushing or forcing you in any way, but allowing you to adapt to his size. "The only way to get ya' to stop talking is with a mouth full of cock, ain't it?"

You hum in response and the sensation is completely enrapturing for Joel, his callused fingers tangle in your hair to ground him as he releases a shaky breath. It's a huge challenge to focus on anything else but him; your mind whirring with a familiar dizziness while you bob your head up and down his shaft, intoxicated by the taste of him, the smell of him and every sound that escapes his lips, making your clit throb with need and your arousal pool in your panties, uncomfortably sticking to your skin.

For Joel, it's overwhelming.

He's never really been the noisy type during sex but heck— you were doing it for him. He's a panting mess above you, his hips buck ever so slightly in tandem with your mouth, trying not to lose it entirely. Your spit drools down his dick and the way your dark, dilated pupils sparkle with lust as you hollow your cheeks around him pulls a groan deep from his throat.

"That's it, you can take it," he coaxes when your nose nudges his pubic bone, the head of his cock hitting the back of your throat. "Good fuckin' girl, just like that..."

Enticed with the praise, you keep repeating the motion, sliding one hand to hold his hipbone for support and feeling his burning skin under your touch whilst the other plays with his balls to aid his pleasure. The obscene slick sounds mix in the air with his hoarse cursing, the rain and the faint music of kings of leon, sex on fire.

He looks so good from this angle, chest rising and falling with heavy, irregular breaths, head thrown back and both hands on you, keeping you angled for his cock. Drops of precum roll on your tongue as you keep changing the pace at which your head moves, tears welling in your eyes and jaw going slack. Shit, you're aching for him so bad that the only thing you can think of to relieve the need is squeeze your thighs together in order to create some friction. And it works, the action eliciting a moan from you that makes him fucking whimper your name.

"Bet your cunt's drippin' just from sucking my dick," he muffles a laugh that turns halfway into a sigh when you pay special attention to the ruddy, sensitive tip. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum-"

You can tell he is by the way his cock twitches in your mouth; his spine straightens at the heat gathering between his legs and he tries to pull you off against your will, uttering a warning that you chose to ignore. Joel's lips part in a throaty groan when he reaches his high, feeling the outline of your fingers digging harshly on his hip, your hand rubbing his length and your tongue lapping at his slit, taking in every single drop of his release until he's spent, right before pressing a soft kiss to it that makes him shiver. And hell— contrary to others, he tasted good; warm and thick, coating your senses.

His heart beats aggressively against his ribs and he loosens his grip on your hair, allowing you to get back on your feet while resting your hands on his waist. Although his eyes are barely open, he can quite literally feel your smile when you chastely kiss his lips. He chuckles breathlessly as you sit beside him, tugging himself back in his pants.

"We're not done yet," he says, grabbing the back of your knee and promptly engulfing your leg around his waist, maneuvering your body so that your back rests against the couch and he's crouched down, caged in the middle of your thighs. "I said I'd make it up to you and I will."

"Well, you've certainly got some stamina in you, old man," you poke fun at him, raising a hand to move those rebellious curls away from his eyes.

Joel smiles, caressing your cheek affectionately. "Always got somethin' to say, don't ya'?"

"Oh, Mr. Miller," you coo, enveloping your arms around his neck, "we both know just how much you love to hear me talk."

"Mhm," he leans down to kiss the corner of your mouth, "yes, I reckon you're right."

His big hand covers nearly half of your face as he holds you still, crashing your lips together. He kisses you deeply, vigorously, in a way that makes you wonder if you could possibly drown in a person's essence. His other palm slides between your bodies to start undoing the buttons of the flannel —his flannel— you were wearing. You can't help but whine when he draws back, watching you from above.

"Joel-" blood rushes through your ears and can feel your cheeks warm up as he takes in the sight of you, his fingers coasting down your throat and to the valley of your breasts, licking his lips when he sees your hardened nipples.

"You're fuckin' beautiful," he speaks freely, without holding back emotion, and it makes your heart skip a beat. "Such a sweet, sweet girl I can't get enough of."

"Then take a picture," you purr, "it'll last longer."

He stares at you through a measuring squint, a lighthearted smile forming on his face. "Since you insist." It takes a moment for you to realize what he means, until you finally recall that there's actually a camera inside your purse; one that he reaches for. "If I remember correctly... You said I could take as many as I like."

You lightly squeeze his waist with your thighs, feeling your whole body burn with anticipation. "I did say that..."

"Let's just pray your dad won't find these hanging around," he ponders, turning your face slightly to the side. "He'll have my head."

"And that would be terrible..."

He takes the Polaroid with one hand, the other coming to grope your breast as he backs off for a better angle, ultimately deciding to wrap his fingers loosely around your neck instead, purely holding you there. You glance at the lens, making your best "fuck me" eyes added to a cheeky smile, hearing him curse under his breath prior to snapping the picture.

"You've got the prettiest fucking tits I've even seen, sweetheart," he snarls, laying a palm flat over your lower abdomen while he waited for the photo.

"Has anyone ever told you you've got such a marvelous way with words?" he suppressed a laugh, safeguarding the picture on the back pocket of his jeans.

"Just a few women." Before you can even begin to act annoyed, he sets the camera aside and leans down to kiss your collarbones, the pad of his thumb kneading circles around your sensitive nipple. "Look at you, honey," he murmurs, "you're so easy to please... Or is it just because of me?"

You're panting, your back arching in response to his constant ministrations, every inch of your skin blushing under his attention. "I think it's-" you're cut off by the sudden need to swallow when he sucks a mark on the vulnerable skin between your breasts, "you."

His body vibrates with a laugh and you feel his hand palm your clothed sex, dragging his tongue over your delicate nipple, gently nibbling at it. You screw your eyes shut and let a single, fluttery moan slide past your lips when his thumb nudges your clit.

"So wet just from giving head?" Joel shakes his head in fake disapproval. "Who knew you were such a horny little thing?"

You are holding onto his bicep for dear life, fearing you might collapse into oblivion if you part from his body. His index glides across your slit over the drenched cotton fabric, making you squirm beneath him.

"You- you tasted good," you babble, mind all over the place. 

"Yeah?" his chest swells with pride, "you should taste yourself, angel," his mouth travels across your abdomen, "sweetest thing I've ever had."

It's pointless trying to conjure a response, you're simply too far gone by now. He hooks your legs over his shoulders and buries his head between your thighs, flattening his tongue against the bundle of nerves. You whimper, running your fingers through his locks and bucking your hips to meet his face.

"Please," you blurt out, "Joel, please..."

"What, sweetheart?" he asks, moving the underwear aside to directly touch your clit, fondling it as he watched your slick coat his fingers. "What do you want?" But you can't conceive an answer, all that could come out of your mouth were those pathetic, desperate moans. "Use your words."

With his free hand he plays with your nipple, grabbing your breast with his entire hand. "I want you."

He tauntingly moves his fingers around your seam, refusing to go any further. "Say it again."

"I want you, Joel."

Cocky bastard.

He licks his fingers clean and starts getting off the couch, leaving you with a confused, dumbfounded expression that nearly makes him crack up.

"You didn't really believe I'd be fucking you on the couch, did ya'?" he teases, but all you can muster up is a barely audible 'oh'. "Come on, let's take this to my room. And don't forget to bring that camera of yours."

Mind still dazing, you obey his instructions, following him silently upstairs as he undoes the buttons of his shirt. For a second, he glances back at you, gifting a soft, reassuring grin before extending his arm to grab your fingers, holding your hand in a pure, intimate touch.

And just for that moment, you forget that he's actually your dad's oldest friend, that he's Sarah's father or any other thought of the sort. He's just Joel. Joel Miller, the only man that has managed to make you feel butterflies in the pit of your stomach, or that made you blush with merely a few compliments.

"Ask me to kiss you," he urges, taking the camera from your hands and carefully placing it on his bedside table, his eyesight fixed on you.

"Kiss me," you don't ask, you downright beg.

He does, though it's not like the previous times. He's tender, almost languid about it. His hands are on your bare hips while yours cup his cheeks; Joel's fingers reach to remove the flannel from your shoulders and moves his lips to the newly exposed skin, murmuring constant admirations. You feel your lungs clench and a tingly sensation on your lower belly.

"I'll take care of you, darlin'." You let the shirt slide down your arms and fall to the floor. "Gonna show you what you've been missin' out on by fooling around with those stupid boys." His words go straight to your core as he takes a step back to sit on the edge of his bed. "Take them off," he gestures to the last piece of clothing on your body.

You compel to his wish, stripping under his prying eyes while he lazily gets rid of his boots. His lips twitch in a smile when he sees the glistening mess he's made of you, promptly dragging you on top of him. Your hands lay flat on his exposed chest shortly before he switches positions, readjusting you on the middle of the bed.

"Joel, please just-" you whine when he keeps playing with your entrance, stretching you with his fingers. Your skin scorches with desire, knees weak from the growing heat on your lower body.

"Stop nagging, sweetheart," he grits through his own lust, his gaze impossibly dark. "I wouldn't want to hurt you."

"Joel, I'm too worked up, I-" you gasp when he curls his fingers inside you, hitting that particular spot that made your toes curl. "Fuck..."

"Come on, baby." He ducks down to kiss the skin behind your ear and his beard tickles nicely. "It's just the two of us now, feel free to be as loud as you need to."

His pants are undone and hanging loosely on his hips, the image being so blatantly erotic that only managed to get you more aroused as you fumble to get rid of his shirt. He chuckles at your eagerness, shrugging it out of the way and haphazardly kicking off his jeans and underwear altogether, discarding them on the floor with the rest of the clothes.

You take a second to revel on his naked figure, his tanned skin, broad shoulders and sturdy chest, the marked collarbones and every noticeable mole. His hair is messy from your fingers, a thin layer of sweat sticks some curls to his temples as his wild, hungry eyes bask in the view of your sopping pussy when he parts your shaky legs further. But the moment of appreciation is brief, both of you being edged and spurred on.

He maneuvers a hand to your lower back and aligns your hips with his, watching the way your hole drips for him, wetting his bedsheets. You're a panting mess beneath him, lightly scratching his shoulder-blades and biting on your bottom lip, looking up at him doe-eyed and all splayed out for him to take. Joel wants to tell you just how badly he's longed for this— how he's been yearning to have you so achingly bad. But right now, feelings overrun his thoughts, especially after hearing his name spilling from your lips, begging for him to take you.

"Relax, darlin'." Joel teases your slit with the head of his cock, rubbing it along your sex and coating it with your slick. Your head tilts backwards, dipping on his pillows, small whines keep spilling from your mouth. "I won't go easy on you."

"Great, cause I don't want you to-" your slurred words get muffled by the sudden feeling of intrusion as he finally buries himself in your cunt, letting out a filthy, guttural groan.

You close your eyes, feeling lightheaded and staggered from the way he was filling you up so nicely, the stretch being a tad painful at first, but the kind of pain that could only ever feel good. Then your whole body quivers from head to toe.

"That's it, you can take it," he mutters, peppering kisses to your chin and collarbones as he bottoms out. "Fuck, you feel divine-" The tight, warm grip you welcome him with resembles nothing he's ever had before. This is new, this is you.

You bear down on his cock, enveloping your legs around his waist and lifting your hips to encourage him. He holds you down with a firm grip around your neck, starting to set a pace with his hips as he draws out and then back in slowly, roughly, making your back arch. Your erect nipples brush against his strong chest and create a delightful friction that has you moaning louder than you could've expected. You're amazed by the way he thrusts into you, somehow mindful to hit every right spot inside you —needless to say that it was something that others could hardly manage before—, his pubic hair tickles the skin below your belly button, sending shivers down your spine that prompt you to drag your nails down his back.

"Look," he indicates, despite your inability to even think straight. "Look," he repeats harshly, using the hand that was on your hips to tilt your head downwards, forcing you to stare at where your bodies connected. It was obscene, the wet noises of your pussy and skin clapping against skin sounding purely pornographic. "Look at the mess you're making."

"Joel, I-" you can't form sentences properly, all your attention being focused on how good he's making you feel. "I'm so close, for god's sake..."

"Lemme help with that," he speaks breathlessly, pining your leg over the crook of his elbow to make his thrusts deeper, more precise. You cry out in bliss, feeling the heat expanding from your stomach to your legs. "Yeah, you're close, I can fuckin' feel it- fuck..."

Your walls flutter around him, squeezing his dick just right. He knows he's in too deep when you call out his name like it's the only word you can remember, when he wallows in the glorious view of your pretty face contorted in pleasure. He looses the grip on your neck and strokes your lower lip with his thumb, prodding you to keep eye contact as your orgasm washes over you. It's electrifying, a feverish kind of sensation that gratifies every nerve on your body.

He rests his forehead on your shoulder, overcame by the intense feeling of euphoria that your body was providing. You realize in that moment that the reason why Joel could fill that void so easily was because he kept prioritizing you above him. Your pleasure was his, too.

"Jesus Christ, Joel-" you mewl when he abruptly pulls out, “… Worth the wait.”

He laughs shakily, kissing your lips shortly. "Turn around, sweetheart. I want to fuck you from behind."

With a buzzing dizziness, you follow his instruction. God, right now you'd do just about anything if he asked you to. You notice movement from his part and patiently wait with your butt up in the air for him to stuff you again; instead, you hear the familiar clicking sound of the Polaroid camera.

"You fucker," you chuckle, "did you just take a picture of my ass?"

"Couldn't help myself," he groans, caressing the soft flesh before lightly slapping it. "You look too damn gorgeous." The hit on your skin burns nicely and you can't hold back the gasp that escapes your lips.

"Shit- do that again..."

You can practically hear his smile when he talks, "You into that?" he repeats the action with a little more force and the pain sends a shock of pure pleasure between your legs, your own fluids dripping down your thighs. "F'course you are, I should've guessed with that attitude of yours."

He plays with your swollen pussy, enjoying your tiny moans and the way your legs tremble as you fist the sheets underneath you, burying your face on his pillow when he spanks you again— this time so hard that it probably left a mark. But before the sting washes away he takes the opportunity to enter you in one swift move, holding your hips steady and trailing his fingers along your spine.

"That's my sweet girl," he praises a midst, starting to grind his cock inside you. "Taking me like you were made for it."

This is way more intense, the angle allowing him to hit deeper, harsher. His gruff moans become more frequent as he speeds up his pace, letting you know just how good you were making him feel. The sensation was purely fantastic, melting every thought away and just leaving Joel Miller to fill you in every sense of the word. His hands are never still, roaming your responsive areas, caressing the most sensitive and always taking care of your aching clit.

You might cry from the overwhelming ecstasy— the way his tip constantly hits the depths of your cunt with each relentless thrust has you seeing stars. Joel gets a thrill from the way you can't seem to get enough of him either, throwing your hips back to meet his unwavering pace, clawing at the pillows and moaning helplessly, pushing him close to his climax.

"Joel, it's too much..." you mumble. "Please, I can't-"

He hunches over you, kissing your nape to ease the overpowering sensations, "Yes, you can. You're a big girl, you can take it." And then your vision goes blurry, all you're able to hear being his disjointed, lewd moans; all you can feel is his hard, hot body flushed to yours, his cock twitching inside you and the wetness of your own body. "That's it, give me another one, baby- fuuuck..."

The buildup is so strong you nearly collapse, feeling yourself tremble as he chases his orgasm, fucking you through yours. His fingers reach your bundle of nerves and apply barely any pressure, which has you coming undone in seconds, absolutely soaking his dick and the sheets beneath you, chanting his name like a prayer. A string of curses falls from his lips as he pulls out and quickly manhandles your fucked out self to lay on your back. He exhales sharply through his nose, spilling his load all over your stomach without even touching himself.

You both stay there for a while, catching your breath and looking intently at each other’s eyes before he rolls over, going limp beside you. You stare blankly at de ceiling, suddenly feeling aggressively aware of your sticky skin covered in sweat and cum, the numbness on your lower body that will surely feel sore in the morning and all the marks he's left dispersed on you. You feel satisfied, fulfilled even. Joy bubbles up your chest and comes out in form of a giggle, one you're unable to hold back.

"What?" he asks, turning his face towards you with a half-smile.

"I don't know, I just..." you shake your head, still laughing. "I don't know."

He chortles in disbelief, holding out a hand to take some tissues from the bedside drawer and going to swipe his mess off your tummy and inner thighs. "Shit, I think I might’ve just fucked the sense out of ya'."

Joel sets himself between your parted legs, laying the weight of his upper body on top of you, resting his chin on your chest, eyes boring into yours. He looks so young like this, despite the greying hair and the small wrinkles, his beautiful brown orbs sparkle ever so brightly under your attentive gaze.

"What will your dad say when he returns and finds out his only daughter has completely lost her mind?" he jokes, cradling you in his big arms.

"Come on," you roll your eyes playfully, "we both know that if I had been in my right mind since the beginning, I probably wouldn't be in your bed right now." He doesn't reply, but his smile doesn't fade either. Joel nuzzles his face on the crook of your neck, kissing your pulse zone briefly before closing his eyes. You run your fingers through his hair, softly massaging his scalp in utter silence.

The wind was howling outside, rustling the tree branches, but at least it wasn't raining anymore. You can feel Joel's heart beating against your ribs, his deep breaths fanning across your shoulder and his unique scent all around you, on you. In spite of the cold air, your naked bodies are warm enough to stay comfortably in this position, at least for a while— however, there's something deep inside you that doesn't want this moment to end.

"Hey," you call him lowly and he hums in response, "can we order pizza?"

He nods faintly, "Anything you want, honey."

Anything.

If only.

"I'll call," you say. "Any specific requests?"

"As long as there isn't any pineapple on it, we're fine." You glance down at him, almost appalled.

"You don't like pineapple on pizza?"

"No. That's disgusting, come on."

"Oh, grow up!" he opens his mouth to retort, but when he sees your dismayed expression he can merely bark a laugh that you get infected with.

"Order whatever you want," he whispers in your ear. "But you'll have to promise something."

"What's that?" you raise an eyebrow, intrigued.

"Say you'll stay," he murmurs, slightly hesitant. "Stay here and spend the night with me."

The proposal takes you by surprise, so much that you actually stopped breathing. You ponder wether if you could or you should; because, at the end, what would a night really mean? What could possibly change?

Nothing, right?

Besides, no one had to know.

(...)

A few moments later you're downstairs looking for your phone, wearing nothing other than his green flannel. Joel decided to take a shower while you ordered the food and you chose to walk around the house, paying attention to the little details you hadn't quite noticed before.

Now that you see it, there are plenty of horse images here and there. Very Texan of Joel, you can't deny. Lots of pictures of Sarah growing up, some of him and Tommy and a good deal with your dad. None of his ex-wife. In fact, there's no proof that she even existed. You decide not too think too hard about it, since it was none of your business after all.

You pour yourself a glass of water and wander your eyes across the amount of pills he usually takes. Anxiety pills, painkillers, vitamins. What could possibly be troubling this middle-aged man so bad? Again, you decide to turn a blind eye and simply pick up the phone, expecting a message from your dad to tell you he arrived in Boston well and safe. Instead, you find that your direct messages in social media have new requests. Curious, you open them to see what the fuzz was about.

Hi!

This is Will

I don't know if Sarah mentioned me...

I'm her English teacher, haha

I hope you don't find this creepy, your profile popped up in my 'people you may know' section and since Sarah said she wanted to introduce us, I thought I might just say hi 😉

Honestly, with everything that went down you had nearly forgotten about Sarah's 'you should hang out with people your age' speech. And now that you were stalking his profile, he appeared to be maybe a couple years older than you— handsome in a boyish, intelectual way, if that made sense. Apparently, he studied in New York too, and lived in Queens.

Hi!

Yeah, I reckon she did

What's up, Queens? :)

You don't really expect a reply, not giving much thought to anything in the moment. Though, an involuntary smile twitches your lips when there's a quick message that reads "Not much, Brooklyn" and the writing bubble underneath.

After all, having a friend in Austin wouldn't hurt.

[samstree]

What’s up readers?! How about a little show and tell? Answer these 13 questions, tag 13 lucky readers and if you’re feeling extra bookish add a shelfie! Let’s Go!

Thank you @darthwillies for the tag!

1) The Last book I read:

The Vampire Lestat. I've been slowly reading the first few Vampire Chronicles books since the TV show took over my body and soul lmao. So far this one is a lot of fun!

2) A book I recommend:

Creatures of a Day. It's a non-fiction and a good look into psychology in general and psychiatrist as a profession. Would highly recommend Irvin Yalom's other books too.

3) A book that I couldn’t put down:

The Song of Achilles. I read very slowly in English but this book had me hooked from the beginning and I finished it in one weekend. This was actually a few years ago now but I haven't had the same experience since. (If anyone knows anything that is the same but like...different, please let me know alskjdf)

4) A book I’ve read twice (or more):

This Is Going to Hurt. I really liked the humor in the book when the topic is so serious. It's about working in health care and especially in the OB ward. Witnessing life and death daily can't be easy, but Adam Kay makes it easy to read.

5) A book on my TBR:

The Red Sorghum. It's been on my TBR since it won the Nobel prize lmao. The theme is very heavy though, but anyway, one day I will read, even just for the nobel.

6) A book I’ve put down:

All the Light We Cannot See. The writing is beautiful but the WWII story just doesn't draw me in as much. Maybe one day I will go back to it.

7) A book on my wish list:

Can I put an unpublished book here? The Winds of Winter lol, if I can be cheeky for a bit. Watching House of the Dragon really just brought me back into my asoiaf era. I feel sixteen again and piecing together all the clues for the sequel and thinking about all the theories. Unfortunately it is still very much a wish list.

8) A favorite book from childhood:

Journey to the West! Who doesn't love an adventure story about four besties going on a road trip that is full of cool monsters of the week? Also the whole book is metaphor for buddhist enlightenment. So it really contains multitudes.

9) A book you would give to a friend:

Silver in the Wood. It's a short novel that I brought to a long flight and just finished in one go. It makes you feel like you've just taken a little walk in the forest. It's a light read that makes a perfect gift!

10) A book of poetry or lyrics that you own:

Does Evgenii Onegin count as poetry? It's one of my favorite reads back in university. Partly because of the adapted play I think, it is still the top theater experience I've ever had.

11) A nonfiction book you own:

When Breath Becomes Air. It was written by a surgeon about his journey battling cancer at the end of his life. It's one of the books that stayed with me, having read it after cancer being such a huge part of my life for years. I feel like I got some answers from it and would recommend everyone to read.

12) What are you currently reading:

Queen of the Damned. More sexy vampires! Some of them are even old AND sexy!

13) What are you planning on reading next?

Keep reading through the Vampire Chronicles until reason and taste fail me (or Anne Rice does). I hear people tend to stop at some point during the 12 books in the whole series. We'll see how long I last.

tagging: @kuripon @cherryjuicegf @silvipeppers @tideswept @valdomarx. No pressures of course <3

[pavloveme]

so i watched interview with the vampire.

and you're gonna be like "laila, i thought you like to watch things after the hype has died down" well i thought so too but they put it on netflix and the brainworms got to me. i watched both seasons in a weekend. i'm gonna read the books next. usually i really don't like shows where the characters you follow are just "so complex!!!1!!!!1" and "hard to understand!!!1!!!!1" because a lot of the time this is just a cheap copout for people who want to fuck very surface level villains with very surface level writing (a lot of you have let fanon make you think some characters are deeper than they actually are but thats a story for another day) but i am SO happy to report that this is NOT the case for interview with the vampire. you have so many conflicting feelings for all of these characters (except claudia. i do in fact support her every decision. love that queen. my princess.) and it's just so good. this is the true drama people are looking for on tv. kind of wish it was on during the era of cable cuz you KNOW it would've been craycray. going into this, i really was expecting to completely dislike lestat but honestly i can't even say that. i love him and i hate him. the same way i love and hate louis and i love and hate armand. claudia and daniel are really the only characters that i love unconditionally. but there are so many scenes that just really pull on my heart strings. the finale where lestat says "armand called me, did you hurt yourself?" with those SAD ASS EYES. i don't know if people have already said this but whenever lestat is really sad sam reid puts on these puppy eyes that practically FORCE you to feel bad its insane. and louis.......... the man who is fumbled over and over again constantly. my favorite unreliable narrator. seeing how the "turning of claudia REALLY went down lowkey rewired some neurons. "please ill do anything ill be anything please please please." the guilt was literally eating him alive to the point of no return. that had me really gagged. jacob anderson lowkey best actor ever? like where are the awards we need them right now. and armand......... oh armand. biggest fumbler ive ever seen. its okay though cuz he's gonna fuck that old man. i know he is. but him lying over and over again to louis is actually so crazy. like bro is a pathological liar AND a gaslighter. you've been alive for over five hundred years and i can tell you havent gone to therapy not one time in your entire life. like for him to take the credit for lestat saving louis is what REALLY got me. like lowkey that's worse than the betrayal itself. like 70 years of mending back together our relationship after you killed my daughter and almost me only for me to find out MY EX SAVED ME? AND NOT YOU? like oh i would've really crashed out. and my dear claudia.... my favorite. it's so crazy like i will absolutely not allow any claudia slander because i can defend her from anything. like i genuinely do not think any "bad" thing claudia does is her fault because she literally did not ask for this. like you can argue that it made her life WORSE! instead of simply dying in that moment, she had to die later after suffering so much and THEN proceeding to experience happiness for one moment (insert the have you ever gotten everything you ever wanted? no. but i once got very close quote here). claudia did nothing but suffer, was treated seriously by NO ONE in her life, and the one time someone picks her, they both proceed to die immediately after. that genuinely upset me so much i wanted to turn the tv off. and the crazy thing is we ALL knew claudia was going to die because they talked about her in past tense THE ENTIRE INTERVIEW! LIKE I KNEW SHE WAS DEAD THE ENTIRE TIME! AND I STILL WANTED TO SMASH THE TV! it's actually insane. at least in her final moments madeleine chose her. which was done very beautifully in my opinion. "my coven is claudia." goosebumps man. because a lot of people probably would've chosen the other option but no not madeleine. she loved claudia more than she wanted to live. i love this show man.

[vanalex]

I can't help it... I'm obsessed with him...

A little "history lesson" (for the ones interested) about how I became a fan of Type O Negative... and my feelings towards them...

When I heard 'my girlfriend's girlfriend ' for the first time in 1996 I was just a teen. Watching MTV in my bedroom. I was, at that time, very much into 60s music and aesthetic. A hippie après la lettre, sort of speak... I was also, for as long as I remember, obsessed with vampires and a huge fan of Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles.

So when this video came on I loved the colorful backdrop and sixties influences. And then there were 4 guys dressed in black, looking like vampires. Especially the singer. I lost it. This was my new favorite band. 🤗

When 'Love you to death' came out I ordered the T-shirt (a girl t-shirt, not the unisex shirts they sell now) via postorder catalogue Large. I loved that T-shirt and would still have it, if my mom didn't throw it out with all my other band shirts, because she thinks you need to keep the economy going by buying new stuff all the time and getting rid of "old" stuff. Insert *dramatic eyeroll*

Type O Negative were not a mainstream band and unfortunately, growing up in a small town, I was about the only one, as far as I know, that liked their music.

So, I completely missed out on their 1999 world coming down release. ☹️

In the early 2000s, a record store in the city where I went to college had a clearance sale. I found the least worst of CD and bought it. Around that same time I bought the After Dark DVD. It was only then that I found out about world coming down. I liked the "new" songs, but also had mixed feelings about them. They depicted an unhealthy lifestyle.

In 2003 'I don't wanna be me' was playing on MTV and I was excited to hear more new music from them and seeing them on MTV again. I remember also being shocked with Peter's appearance in that video. He did not look well... It would become clear he wasn't doing well at all: mental and physical health problems, addiction, jail time, forced rehab, relationship problems, etc...

Later that year Type O Negative came to a festival a few hours driving from where I lived... Unfortunately I had noone to go with and my boyfriend and I were volunteering for a local 'save the forest' non profit that same weekend. I thought I would see them next time, but the same circumstances made me not see them in 2007... 😥

And although Peter looked better (healthier) in the late 2000s, he aged a lot due to his addictions and lifestyle, he also looked kind of sad when he was performing on Wacken in 2007.

When he died in 2010 I initially had peace with it, thinking it was probably for the best.... knowing about his struggles and losses...

I did not know about the circumstances of his death until many years later and since then I've felt it could have been prevented. He did not OD, he did not commit suicide... he was clean for almost a year (!), he looked happy in his last interview 🥹... he died because he didn't receive the correct medical care on time... because he was taking care of his sick cat instead of himself, because the people nearby him didn't help (Did they not see/know how severely ill he was? I guess we'll never know)...

I've always felt like I missed out on something with not seeing Type O Negative live. From all the bands I've listened to as a teen until now, they're the only band that I love more with each time I listen to them. I don't have this kind of connection with other bands/artists... Seeing pictures, videos, ... of them makes me very nostalgic... it feels like they're still around. And then it hits me they're not 😥 I just miss this band a lot and wish we had more years with them, more music...

So... seeing old pictures of them, especially Peter in his more happier and healthier years (everything before world coming down era and even before 1997), makes me feel nostalgic ... "obsessed" ... and the pictures where he smiles are solid gold. 💚

I wonder... did he ever know how truly special he was ? Handsome, intelligent, goofy, creative, sensitive... I guess he didn't and let his value be determined by others. At least, that's how I interpret some of his lyrics... What do you think about this?

So, what's your story? Why do you love their music? I would love to find out!

This last picture is my absolute favorite 💚

[eoinmcgonigal]

A list of my published SAS:RH fics

just sort of tidying up i guess idk

Paddy Mayne/Eoin McGonigal

Melody - T, 1.4k pre-canon falling in love

Refrain - M, 10k [UNFINISHED] post-canon, resurrection, Eoin & Jock are alive again

Beat - T, 1k post-canon, chronic pain Paddy, hurt/comfort

Diminished - T, 4k canon era, memory loss, reunions

Fermata - T, 1k afterlife, death, reunion

Jig - G, 0.6k modern au, halloween decorating

Transposition - E, 1.7k canon setting, weird physiology/creatures au, knotting .

Johnny Cooper/Bill Fraser

A Shortcut vs. the Long Way Round - T, 0.5k modern au, a shortcut through a graveyard

Alien Readings - T, 0.4k modern au, Bill's book reading isn't what it's supposed to be

Death's Embrace - M, 0.4k canon era, he is dead, but still with him

The Perfect Pumpkin - T, 1.4k modern au, Bill surrenders the perfect pumpkin to a stranger

One Day - T, 0.4k modern au, a cosy weekend away in a cabin

What If? - T, 2.1k modern au, they meet a few years after high school, while Bill is having a bad day

Horrifying Choice - T, 0.4 modern au, they try to pick a movie for a date night

Naebody Wauks - T, 1.8k modern au, no one's warned the newcomer to the community not to walk the brae at night

Vampires Don't Exist - T, 0.3k modern au, Johnny tries to tell Bill what he is

Not Scared of Spiders - T, 0.3k modern au, there's a spider in the bathroom

This Tender, Perfect Place - M, 0.7k modern au, vampire!Johnny bites Bill in bed (same au as Vampires Don't Exist)

Shattered and Frozen - T, 1.3k modern au, Johnny is having a bad day, a stranger is kind

To Hear Things Unspoken - T, 5k canon au, Bill ends up able to hear everyone's thoughts

We Were Here - T, 1.5k modern au, as they explore an abandoned building, Bill remembers something from another life

Unnatural Sounds - T, 0.5k modern au, Johnny thinks the kitchen is haunted .

Johnny Cooper/Reg Seekings

Warm Relief - E, 0.9k modern au, watersports

Getting Lucky - E, 1.9k any au/postwar au, glory holes, first meetings

Fistful of Heaven - E, 1.7k modern au, fisting, aftercare

Choking on You - E, 0.6k canon au, undernegotiated kink, asphyxiation, no aftercare

The Shallow Deep Sea - E, 2.6k canon au, sentient creatures, tentacle sex, pre-relationship

I'll Give Anything but I Won't Give Up - E, 1.4k canon au, aftercare, sequel to Choking on You

Me, Inside You; You, Inside Me - E, 1.2k modern au, developing relationship, object insertion

Toe to Toe - E, 2.8k canon era, foot fetish, foot jobs, pre-relationship

In a Heartbeat - E, 1.8k canon era, crushes, bad flirting, oblivious Reg, frottage

Girly Show - E, 2.3k modern au, camboy!johnny, feminisation, masturbation

Taste You - M, 0.3k canon era, smoking, shotgunning .

I only wrote one fic for these pairings

Gen/No Pairing - SAS: Rogue Ghosts - T, 1.3k [UNFINISHED] BBC ghosts crossover, post-canon, everybody lives

Johnny Cooper/Eoin McGonigal - Shelter in the Shade - T, 2k canon era, flirting, first kiss

Eve Mansour/Eoin McGonigal - Welcome Command - E, 1.9k canon era, fuck buddies, riding crops

Eve Mansour/Paddy Mayne - A Place of Worship - E, 1.6k canon era, sequel to Welcome Command/same AU, oral sex

Johnny Cooper/himself - Sound Performance - E, 0.9k modern au, camboy!johnny, sounding

Pat Riley/anonymous - A Satisfying Place to Be - E, 0.9k any au, glory holes, blow jobs

Bill Fraser/Mike Sadler - "Can you feel it?" - E, 1.1k any au, fisting, aftercare

Mike Sadler/David Stirling - A Better Use - E, 0.9k canon era, face-sitting

Jim Almonds/Johnny Cooper - A Loser's Victory - E, 1.9k modern au, gym au, secret crush, spanking

Paddy Mayne/Mike Sadler - Sharp Change - M, 1.3k canon au, piercing .

My AO3 i haven't included the kiss/touch/fuck ficlets, but you can find them here: #ktf prompts

[jade-of-mourning]

i wrote this post two months ago, but i was thinking about how much i love music on accident again and now i'm going to make an incredibly self-indulgent and unwarranted post on music i think that krew+opal in a modern au would enjoy based on music i like.

opal would definitely love lamp and other j-indie bossa-nova/jazz/folk sounding types — ichiko aoba/kaneko ayano/fishmans/nujabes come to mind. she also gives sweet trip/panchiko and adrianne lenker. she'd possibly like norah jones/jolie holland in a different sphere. i think she'd be into more experimental flavor of black country, new road/black midi/kero kero bonito. she'd like the city-pop in anri and j-pop like aimyon.

asami also seems like she would like lamp, though to a lesser extent than opal, and probably romantic-era classical music (specifically, chopin). she'd be a slowcore duster/bedhead/mazzy star type, and probably love dream-pop beach house too. she'd be a secret fan of jazz-punk/noise midori and in japanese shoegaze-alternative flavor with plastic girl in the closet/kinokoteikoku/my dead girlfriend, and i can see her being into either nick drake or psychedelic rock — something mildly high, probably. i can see her liking suzanne vega/fiona apple/aimee mann a lot too. i think that between her and opal, they'd have the most music-nerd music taste. idk how to express it… that rym sort of music taste haha

mako is either the type to say "i don't listen to music", or if he does, he gives straight face while listening to crunchy noise and ambient deeply miserable-edgy, like nouns/teen suicide/have a nice life. he'd enjoy high quality japanese jazz-instrumental math rock like mouse on keys/fox capture plan/t-square, but i think he'd also have a guilty pleasure for the mildly-adjacent, crappy midwest emo. not sure why, maybe it's the album covers and names, but he really gives parannoul. he has the energy of a british new-wave the smiths/radiohead/the cure kind of guy. he's probably prone to get too deep in his feelings in sujfan stevens/giles corey. i think like opal, he'd enjoy big thief/adrianne lenker a lot too.

korra would like pop-punk and alternative a lot and also rnb, maybe korean rnb like jiwoo/miso. but she'd love pup/paramore/sorority noise a lot and i think she'd also be fan of jazz-punk/noise sound in midori, and also accidentally nu-metal loathe/tool/slipknot. i feel like she'd really like the synthpop in magdalena bay and she too would vibe to anri a lot. i think she'd be a fan of emo in unconcentrated forms only (specifically los campesinos!), or maybe also power pop. i could imagine her enjoying certain flavors of breakcore and electronic and for some reason i see her liking nirvana/red hot chilli peppers/the smashing pumpkins. all in all, mostly anything that's more upbeat and has energy to it. she'd probably be a mitski listener at certain times too, in all honesty.

bolin's more pop/rock and probably some alternative, though i think he'd lean more towards ok go/cracker/camper van beethoven/modest mouse. i can also see him liking vampire weekend/the postal services/death cab for cuties a lot. i feel like he would secretly enjoy mako's british-new-wave flavor but refuse to admit it to the general populace because he is an independent man! he also gives they might be giants/jukebox the ghost/ben folds five fan, aka sounds-like-children's-music-but-is-kinda-messed-up piano-rock-esque (it epitomizes him), and upbeat neo-psychedelia animal collective is just very bolin. i also see him casually enjoying the shins and the 1975.

i think that among them, there'd be a mutual enjoyment of lamp (most of all opal/asami/mako in that order) and mitski (with bolin being the only outlier in the mitski department lol). i think that if they were ever put in a car together they would never not play there is a light that never goes out and that they'd all be a fan of any music involving car crashes actually. i can't really imagine any of them outside of opal liking folk or any of them outside of korra liking any form of metal and i don't see any hyperpop in their energy sorry lol. only asami and mako seem like they would really like instrumental stuff, though different spheres of it. actually i think the two of them would overlap the most in music taste for some reason (with opal in the same arena), even if the examples i provided don't have a lot of overlap lol, followed by korra and bolin.

[kmze]

Not you posting so much tvd content that it almost makes me wanna fangirl like old times.I even rewatched their morning after scene, over the weekend ,where they look married AF. *GIANT HEART EYES* and their second proposal.I  squealed when stefan called himself "intellectually blind"  and my partner who had to endure my vampire diaries era was watching me almost as if he was reliving those days in his head.

HAHA I know! I feel like I missed out on a lot of good gifsets over the years because I really didn't use this site since 2019 and came back and loaded up my queue with so much! I didn't even plan on doing a major rewatch I was just bored and saw it on my Max app and was like why not, started writing down my thoughts and now I can't believe how many Anon messages I get lol. They had so many cute and adorable scenes and watching them all over again always makes me smile, they are just such a serotonin boost! I am glad you are enjoying the nostalgia :)

I really love Stefan's speech in the second proposal exactly because of that part where he calls himself an idiot lol. One of my favorite things about Stefan when it came to Caroline was how it wasn't easy for him like it was with Elena. With Elena he knew the part he needed to play and they both played it well but with Caroline it's not easy (I don't think anyone has ever called Caroline Forbes easy to handle) because he can't pretend with her and that's what makes them a more "real" relationship IMO and more interesting to watch.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 3/28/2023

accidentally read five books.

listening

look i know there's a new fall out boy but i have conflicting opinions about that band bc i am no longer seventeen.

MARINA (formerly Marina and the Diamonds) was another artist coming up when i was in high school, but even though Family Jewels was one of the first albums i really got into, she has soundtracked far less of my life compared to FOB so listening to her is a little less fraught. nothing else has taken up space in my brain this week like the lyrics to hollywood: "hollywood infected your brain/you wanted kissing in the rain".

kind of obsessed how the music video cuts out an entire chunk of lyrics about dissatisfied flight attendants? also jesus christ this came out in 2010. BABY marina

originally stuck in my brain bc my sister and i were talking about the musical chicago, and this song contains the lyrics "oh my god you look just like shakira/no wait you're catherine zeta/actually my name's marina"

-

reading

Star Wars: Dark Disciple by Christie Golden. ventress has never been my favorite of count dooku’s batmanesque kidnapped children. i respect her! she’s awful! i want to see her flirt with obi-wan more but maul (my beloved) has always had more screen time and depth.

it’s spackled together from most of a cancelled eight-episode clone wars arc and it kind of shows? this is not to say that star wars books are uninterested in the interiority of their characters, but we rarely get in their heads. star wars books are much more focused on what it looks like in the movie— there are big cinematic set pieces where it’s important to know exactly where everyone is in a fight.

golden writes a competent action scene. this is more than i can say for many star wars writers.

^ i am shoving my fist into my mouth and screaming.

anyway, one of my worst character traits is a latent previously discussed fondness for steampunk and a less latent fondness for urban fantasy.

i read Alexis Hall's Iron and Velvet Kate Kane book a million years ago possibly at the rec of @bronanlynchh during the new hampshire internship, one of the worst depressive periods of my life, but i did consume a lot of gay romance during that period. bc im in my noir era now, reread it and realized there were more! so i devoured them all over the weekend.

to quote @quaraxuanzenith who seems to be the only other person here who has read them recently,

have you ever thought, "Twilight sure is a book, but it would be better if Bella ( a ) realized that Edward is a weird controlling creep, ( b ) dumped him, ( c ) came out to herself as lesbian, and ( d ) went off to become a paranormal private investigator"?

these are just fun nonsense! i loved them and will buy paper copies after i move! i would not call these "spicy", but she falls in and out of the arms of SO many femmes and fatales (who sometimes overlap). there are SO many women throwing themselves at her. it is a delightful way of nodding at the genre's roots bc kate has some game! she doesn't have zero game! she not an oblivious useless lesbian archetype either! but she's usually like ?????? this person is OUT OF MY LEAGUE and never actually realizes a tall, tortured, sad, purple-eyed lady in a trenchcoat is catnip to nearly all wlw.

i think the third book hits its stride and flings you into a rapidly entangling web of loyalties and motivations that i really enjoy in a noir. i like how the author feels no need to write the YA vampire book trilogy she survived. i like how kate has a life going on apart from the stuff that happens in the books. she does not feel like she started existing the moment the book opens.

i finally understand the little old lady love of endless mystery series, bc this is some really comforting reading. i would read twenty of these. i trust that this author's got me and may fling some twists or red herrings at me but ultimately i won't turn the page and she'll be beaten in the street for being an out lesbian. okay so she does get whumped in the street but it's for case reasons

-

watching

virtuosity (1995, dir leonard). the tagline of this film is "Hell hath no fury like a composite of 183 serial killers. Meet Sid 6.7"

is this a Good film? oh god no. if you've seen the tv show interview with the vampire, it has the same contrasting vibes between the two leads, where one is turning in an incredible performance about a black man trying to hold onto family and dignity while the other is prancing around like a deranged show pony. except without the clarity of purpose or production values of a big budget amc tv drama. however, russell crowe (guy i love to see) put his whole ass into this performance. this is not a half-assed acting effort. it is a joy to watch him zip around screen while denzel washington is giving a very good performance as a disgraced, widowed ex-cop.

this really throws a wrench into my whole "if a movie is about being afraid of a robot it's about being afraid of women" bc crowe is not a woman, but he is a malevolent neural network given an android body. a private company has a contract for a police training tool (the neural network trained on 183 serial killers who you can fight in VR) and is testing the interface on prisoners. i wish this movie had anything to say or critique about this three-way partnership other than using it as an inciting incident for what turns into a chase movie. the movie does not attempt to convince you this would be a good idea in a different private company's dev team but i wish the movie spent slightly less time going AAAAAA HOW TO STOP and any time at all going AAAAAAA HOW DID WE LET THIS HAPPEN

i would call this film camp on vibes alone except it is almost completely uninterested in sensuality. the special effects have not aged very well at all, but the film has the same production designer (Nilo Rodis-Jamero) as Johnny Mnemomic (also 1995) so the film Looks.

why? it was leaving canopy soon and when my gender isn't "woman in the same way a sailing ship is a woman" it's "nineties movie club scenes"

-

playing

weird west! still! (image from the steam page bc i keep forgetting to take screenshots)

not terribly worried about the somewhat repetitive nature of the locations themselves, bc the enemy encounters are varied enough it feels like solving a new puzzle each time. also im still having fun.

i have been picking off guys from around the edges of enemy encampments with a silenced rifle and then tanking through this rest with a shotgun and liberal bandage application, as i am wont to do in shooty games, but i cannot currently break my husband out of a mine run by...cannibals? human traffickers to the cannibals? the xp-giving bad guys without getting one of my companions killed. i really don't want to ditch ann lara (i'm not entirely sure what her deal is? sort of a smooth-talking hustler archetype? but really good with pistols?) who has been with me for most of the eight hours i've played this game. the sheriff/my neighbor, along for the ride for her own reasons, has four times as much health as either of us so she's staying. she's been the only one left alive most of my attempts at this one FUCKING cave.

so i am looping back out into the world (sorry husband) to go think about some real tactics. practice my dodge rolls in a less tense environment. perhaps level up some guns and armor. now you might say "kay! isn't it worrying that you're hitting such a big difficulty cliff?" and to that i say "not really bc i cannot stress the amount of simply dicking around and exploring ive done, also i am not a clever woman."

-

making

fallow week

[livrary]

Welcome to the likely brief post-boop social interaction era! Here's an askgame for you ;D

Hey! List five things that make you happy, then if you want, put this in the askbox of the last ten people who liked or reblogged something from you.

Ooh fun, thank you!! I‘m artificially prolonging the era by being absolutely useless at tumblr and just noticing this in my inbox a month later

Here we go, five things making me happy:

1. I just ate lemon sorbet and the weather is finally getting warmer again! Me and some friends are going on a picnic tomorrow as well, summer is just around the corner!

2. A new episode of @keepitsteadypod just came out! It’s very good, everybody should go and listen and support <3 it’s queer and it’s got fake-dating and it’s funny and will most likely make you cry. Would recommend 10/10

3. my ballet classes in general and acing pirouettes specifically

4. I bought some colouring pencils today because I don’t have any at university with me, so I can finally do some relaxing colouring in books :D

5. Music!! Currently vibing to Harmony Hall by vampire weekend and Valens -Spider Lake Version by Graveyard club. Very different songs, but I’ve got the emotional range lol

[chasingfictions]

also uno reverse card-ing florence back at u <3

THANK YOU KING.

on that note:

fav song: KING. i cant describe what this did to me when i heard it for the first time. most insane song in the world . listen to the live at msg version and try not to have full body shivers it;s impossible

least fav song: ok i have certain songs that i have listened to less over the years but lately ive been coming back to them and being like wait does this actually fuck??? which is to say my answer is probably strangeness and charm but now im kind of into it. also toxic opinion i did not enjoy cosmic love for a while like i think it just feels like a song i get fatigued of more? but lately i listened to it again for the first time in a while and i was like OH!! this FUCKS!! holy shit!!! which is to say fatm has the same principle as btvs which is no bad songs / no bad episodes. all good. even when it's bad it's good.

fav album: genuinely dance fever is the best album ever made. like. i think it combines everything that works abt the sound of the lungs/ceremonials era and everything that works abt the sound of the hb3/high as hope era into one perfectly balanced album. NO SKIPS ALBUM. like florence has no bad songs but she does have songs where im like ok im not feeling this right now. im always in the mood for every song on dance fever. she said i am making an album about vampires and mental illness and being queer and god and dancing. and i said HEY!!! HEY I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!! I LVOE YOU!!! i have this album on vinyl also it's the only album i own on vinyl shout out to @ho-tato for buying it for me on vinyl

least fav album: ok dont hate me but i think high as hope is one of her weaker albums. like i still LOVE high as hope i love that whole era when it came out i listened to it on repeat for like 3 weeks. BUT idk for me i think the songs are a little less distinctive ? still obviously bops. 'no choir' is insane. literally she is out here making songs that speak to the rest of her discography. 'no choir' is cousins with 'restraint'. and like if u asked me abt any individual song on high as hope i'd be like yeah it FUCKS. but as a whole album i think it's a little too muted? or maybe i just wish it was longer? idk. i love you high as hope. youre my cherished baby high as hope im sorry i said all this.

song that got me into them: ok this is so hard to say bc i have loved fatm since like. the 7th grade. but the first song i remember getting REALLY into is 'landscape-demo'. EVERYONE GO LISTEN TO LANDSCAPE DEMO. SHE'S JUST LIKE THE WEATHER! CANT HOLD HER TOGETHER! BORN FROM DARK WATER! DAUGHTER OF THE RAIN AND SNOWWWW. oh my god. shrimp emotions.the right way to listen to that song is when ur 13 and on the bus to middle school and it's a dark morning shifting into daylight and also you just started practicing witchcraft .

seen live; YES!!!!! ive seen her 3 times!!!!! for the first time at a music festival during the hb3 era, and then at a free concert for a talk show also during the hb3 era and then i saw her in CONCERT during the high as hope era every single time changed me as a person. i couldnt go to her concert in my city during the dance fever tour bc it was the same weekend as my brother's wedding. im fine about it. im FINE. i just wish her and my brother had planned better. would some cross communication have been so hard. and also i know her intimately from my whole chest and my spirit so in that sense i see her live every day.

rating: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10  !!! one million!!! ten billion!!!!!!!!! there is no numerical value for her she transcends that. i want to be ejected into outer space with her.

[thanksforthedinosaur]

july 2023

1. jess kallen - exotherm 2. corook - if i were a fish 3. helena deland - spring bug 4. boyish - kill your pain 5. pynkie - unsee 6. slow pulp - slugs 7. leanna firestone - foreverever 8. zoey lily - not responsible 9. middle kids - bootleg firecracker 10. lewis ofman - highway 11. waterbaby - airforce blue 12. the japanese house - morning pages 13. sophie cates - walking the dogs 14. steady holiday - high alert 15. hozier - unknown / nth 16. heather sommer - it's a part of human nature 17. isabel pless - little life 18. anna st. louis - sad eyes 19. andrea von kampen - juniper 20. josephine - parking tickets 21. sun kil moon - damian 22. colbie caillat - pretend 23. jason mraz - pancakes & butter 24. scarlett - fiction 25. small crush - 5 26. paul cherry - playroom 27. katie von schleicher - elixir 28. trace - commotion 29. vagabon - can i talk my shit? 30. the front bottoms - punching bag 31. kogane - on and on 32. palehound - independence day 33. niall horan - never grow up 34. faye webster - but not kiss 35. together pangea - how the story ends 36. honeymoan - sit right 37. shamir - oversized sweater 38. jennie abrahamson - tiden 39. charlotte lawrence - boys like you 40. d4vd - you and i 41. sunday moon - jump 42. hydrogen sea - candy 43. beach fossils - sleeping on my own 44. brothertiger - take a picture 45. fractures - connect 46. madeon - gonna be good 47. pinkpantheress - angel 48. 8485 - breakers 49. donna missal - tomorrow 50. slayyyter - out of time 51. kim petras - uhoh 52. ralph - pain relief 53. chela - hard 4 you 54. carly rae jepsen - shy boy 55. felivand - miss my baby 56. doja cat - attention 57. the weeknd - popular 58. upsahl - good girl era (side a) 59. mothica - glow in the dark 60. voilà - crybaby 61. benee - do it again 62. charly bliss - you don't even know me anymore 63. olivia rodrigo - vampire 64. northstar - for members only (alternate version) 65. hurry - beggin’ for you 66. thank you, i'm sorry - this house 67. pool kids - arm's length - alternate version 68. galileo galilei - 汐 69. curtail - driver 70. ratboys - it's alive! 71. jimmy eat world - telepath 72. the aquadolls - spotlight 73. me not you - nobody's perfect 74. bully - all i do 75. feeble little horse - freak 76. rancid - don't make me do it 77. nuzzle - unbreakable you 78. boilermaker - crispin glover weekend 79. loma prieta - circular saw 80. サクラsakura-lee - tokio nakameguro 81. princess nokia - angels & demons 82. saba - hue_man nature 83. phora - to the grave 84. metro boomin - calling 85. miraa may - 2 rude 86. arlo parks - bruiseless 87. tash - 787 88. justin nozuka - lay down 89. kiana ledé - promise me 90. d smoke - work hard play hard 91. guru doug - life's puzzle 92. janelle monáe - phenomenal 93. tobi lou - forecast https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5weXMvoBXqoUgduFYHPkye?si=1b927d137dd14a53

[baekhvuns]

HAHAHAHAHA NOT ATEEZ COMING TO EUROPE WHEN I WILL BE IN KOREA, I CAN NEVER FUCKING WIN???? I'm honestly so mad, and they announced the tickets in DECEMBER?! When most people are broke... and the tour starts in February already 🔫I couldn't go before and now this fucking shit... tbh I expected it 🤡 I'll never be able to see them again. Bet they'll go somewhere else while I'm in Korea...

I love the 🥑that's so random? But booooo for people doing the nasty there

Speaking of THOSE fans, this girl is the one who had all the cute Star Wars roleplays with Hwa on fan calls. But she seems like a bitch, deleting comments who call her out, not sending shit because she needs to follow Atz everywhere. Karma

Anime I hate... there are so many lol, definitely Diabolik Lovers, Wolf Girl and My Little Prince - wasted my time on them, there's also anime called Pupa - AWFUL, I also don't get the hype about My Teen Romantic Comedy is SNAFU, maybe I don't hate it but I gave it so many chances... the characters are just annoying imo. Uhm and Vampire Knight, Guilty Crown 💀

Yesss, go read everything. Some webtoons are behind the pass, but most aren't. I'll catch up on the Harem this weekend, though I'm suffering from bad headaches so maybe not </3

I bet BBC will gatekeep the name Loona :/ hopefully they can succeed.

The WC is a mess, Germany lol, Belgium is out, Uruguayas well, Morocco is 1st, crazy times.

Soohyuk is old enough to be my husband actually 🤭 Seongyuk brothers is an agenda I can always get behind

Good luck on your finals! Lmao Chris Pratt what didn't he do... the worst Chris out there truly I only liked him in The Office, but then he believed he could act and yeah. Voicing Mario???

Hwa deserves a better AU than Twilight, come on. But he's serving so much vampirism it's insane. The JP albums are money grabs and that's it

Literally Seonghwa had black hair for the majority of his career, LET IT GO FOR A MOMENT. I only miss black Hwa when I look at his DV era

Your dream is like an anime scene I'm pretty sure I saw a chasing scene like that somewhere lmao. Were you running like Minho in his promo photos for Chase? Hdygsysbshaishsgas

Ooof Lookass enjoyers won't like it, also I don't believe anything SM says, but maybe I'll start liking SuperM's music now lol.

The snow omgggg are you all ok?!

I had a strong Draco era... can't lie to you, it's the bleach blonde hair

Yeah Hyudawn's break up hurt, also Dawn is suing someone?! People need to leave them alone though instead of analysing their whole lives. And some bitches dare to say "now them getting kicked out of Cube was pointless"???

Pls junior Hwa tutor me, idc what, I'll be starting at YOU anyways

Our wrapped aaaand relatable

Ok?

My birthday is coming indeed 🔫 old age era

That guy Wooyoung, is his forehead empty as well?

Literally maybe it's for the best I'm not going. But I won't experience Cyberpunk Hwa... I hate everyone - DV 💖

hello hi!!

HAHAHAHAHA NOT ATEEZ COMING TO EUROPE WHEN I WILL BE IN KOREA, I CAN NEVER FUCKING WIN???? I'm honestly so mad, and they announced the tickets in DECEMBER?! When most people are broke... and the tour starts in February already 🔫I couldn't go before and now this fucking shit... tbh I expected it 🤡 I'll never be able to see them again. Bet they'll go somewhere else while I'm in Korea...

NO FUCKING WAY, GET OUT OF HERE, NO WAY 😭😭😭😭 HOW, OUT OF ALL CHANCES ITS JUST THEN NAURRR 😭😭😭 STOP IT IS THERE ANY CHANCE U CAN POSTPONE IT BY A MONTH OR SOMETHING,,, 70 DAYS TILL THE NEXT TOUR BESTIE 😭😭😭 stop bc what if they announce the cb + seatiny tour when ur in kr 😭😭😭 makes the two of us then! 😭😭

I love the 🥑that's so random? But booooo for people doing the nasty there

IT REALLY IS SO RANDOM AND IT SHINES AND LIGHTS UP TOO! yeah bc 💀💀 there’s a whole doing the deed position guideline on a reddit community of my uni 😭😭

Speaking of THOSE fans, this girl is the one who had all the cute Star Wars roleplays with Hwa on fan calls. But she seems like a bitch, deleting comments who call her out, not sending shit because she needs to follow Atz everywhere. Karma

wait and they own ppl money??? scamming them and all??? now hold on… 🤚🏼 & yunho?? 😶😶 oop.

Anime I hate... there are so many lol, definitely Diabolik Lovers, Wolf Girl and My Little Prince - wasted my time on them, there's also anime called Pupa - AWFUL, I also don't get the hype about My Teen Romantic Comedy is SNAFU, maybe I don't hate it but I gave it so many chances... the characters are just annoying imo. Uhm and Vampire Knight, Guilty Crown 💀

BDNDBDHD THERES SO MANY INDEED, quite questionable,,, ive never watched my little prince and will not watch it fbfb,,, tbh isnt school days bad too 😭😭 I AGREE, I HAVE THIS IMMENSE HATE FOR DIABOLIK LOVERS,,, SNAFU looks like k!on the poster is so nice but nOW 🔫 oMG do u rmr negima 😭😭

Yesss, go read everything. Some webtoons are behind the pass, but most aren't. I'll catch up on the Harem this weekend, though I'm suffering from bad headaches so maybe not </3

i read harem and SIR SONNAUGHT IS SO RBMWBDWKHDKW HES SO JEALOUS RKQKEKFHWKDHWK I NEED THEM TOGETHER 😭😭😭 klein is still vv wholesome cinnamon roll <3 I HOPE UR HEADACHES GET BETTER !!!!

I bet BBC will gatekeep the name Loona :/ hopefully they can succeed. //// The WC is a mess, Germany lol, Belgium is out, Uruguayas well, Morocco is 1st, crazy times.

i hope if they do gatekeeper it, they can get the name luna or like a smarter abbreviation of it tbh bc it’ll be such a miss,, IT REALLY IS but the sk??? im so surprised and this??? LMFAOOOO HE HIT RONALDO’S EGO BAD DBDB ITS SO FUNNY FBFBFB AND DESERVED,, the wc is so unpredictable crazy 😭😭 and?? 😭😭

Soohyuk is old enough to be my husband actually 🤭 Seongyuk brothers is an agenda I can always get behind

LMFAOOOO ANON DVWKHDJWHDJW WHEN IS THE WEDDING PLS SEND AN INVITE I NEED A REASON TO COME TO EUROPE PLS

Good luck on your finals! Lmao Chris Pratt what didn't he do... the worst Chris out there truly I only liked him in The Office, but then he believed he could act and yeah. Voicing Mario???

thank you <3 hopefully i make it fbfbf 😭😭 …..omg???? WHAT THE HELL???? what a heinously right wing guy 😭😭?? AND HE’S NOT BANNED YET? JEEZ

Hwa deserves a better AU than Twilight, come on. But he's serving so much vampirism it's insane. The JP albums are money grabs and that's it

if not twilight then vampire diaries au 👀 but stefan is a mingi or a san and damon is mr park itself <3 AND BESTIE THIS ? THIS??? i got some real hd videos and photos from the concert and i had a very spiritual experience seeing them they live photos ,,,, how did u survive this man irl,, my friends got the seats right in front of the stage and they screamed so loud their throats have 📉📉📉 & the cyberpunk live haha ha…ha

Literally Seonghwa had black hair for the majority of his career, LET IT GO FOR A MOMENT. I only miss black Hwa when I look at his DV era

EXACTLY 😭😭 LET HIM DO WHAT HE WANNA ITS HIS HAIR PLS ITS NICE TO SEE COLOURS EVEN IF ONE DOESNT LIKE THEM !!! hair makes kpop ✊🏼

Your dream is like an anime scene I'm pretty sure I saw a chasing scene like that somewhere lmao. Were you running like Minho in his promo photos for Chase? Hdygsysbshaishsgas

BRKWHDKSHDKW the dream was so dramatic and the first ive dreamt in a whole that i have not had any since then <33 LNFQDJWKJDSK I WAS RUNNING LIKE MINHO BACK IN 2010 AT ISAC JDSJSJ

Ooof Lookass enjoyers won't like it, also I don't believe anything SM says, but maybe I'll start liking SuperM's music now lol.

UR CORRECT I DONT BELIEVE ANYTHING SM SAYS UNTIL ITS CONFIRMED AND POSTED ON THEIR TWT no tbh superm was never bad 😭😭 they had some great songs as their bsides too, OH ANON U BETTER BC U KNOW SUPERM WOULD COME TO LONDON FBDB begging they come to van

The snow omgggg are you all ok?!

the snow! made my campus close! a bridge closed! my dad was asked to return back bc the bridge to his work was flooded w snow,, ppl who went to places in the morning came hole after 8-11 hours,,, someone’s kid went to school at 4 and came at 11 😭😭 15mm snow and its going down hill <33

I had a strong Draco era... can't lie to you, it's the bleach blonde hair

i STILL am into my draco era,, hermoine and draco? ult enemies to lovers, they started it all for me fbfb ITS THE BEACH BLOND RIGHTTT SOMETHING ABOUT THAT COLOUR maybe thats why we like it on hwa

Yeah Hyudawn's break up hurt, also Dawn is suing someone?! People need to leave them alone though instead of analysing their whole lives. And some bitches dare to say "now them getting kicked out of Cube was pointless"???

HES WHAT?? 😭😭😭 NOO ur right,, the amount of videos and theories on my youtube tl on them analyzing every bit of their relationship is crazy,,, ???? WDYM ITS NOT LIKE THEYD KNOW THIS WOULD HAPPEN HELLO 😭😭😭

Pls junior Hwa tutor me, idc what, I'll be starting at YOU anyways //// Our wrapped aaaand relatable

i meaaan if u keep getting bad grades he’d be stuck with you 🥰🥰 DBWMDBWK EXACTLY EXACTLY !!!! but my wrapped was fearless as the most listened song 😭😭 something happened on june 5 that i played it 56 times 😭😭😭 and then followed by invu love dive tell me what is love and identity dbdb HWLP THE I WANT HIM TO SIT ON ME DBDB

HOW WAS UR WRAPPED

Ok? ///// My birthday is coming indeed 🔫 old age era

he acknowledged his furry roots PROUDLY <3 OLD AGE ERA 😭😭😭 NAURRR

That guy Wooyoung, is his forehead empty as well?

i think it is! its the way he’s touching it makes me think it is!

Literally maybe it's for the best I'm not going. But I won't experience Cyberpunk Hwa... I hate everyone - DV 💖

cyberpunk hwa…..ha ha. san’s hips…. mingi…ur absolutely not prepared

heres some of the photos my friends got! like one 😭

TELL ME THIS ISNT THE FRAT BOY LINE

AND UHHH THOUGHTS ON HOCKEY PLAYER SAN

???? 😭😭😭 i had the zoomed in video of theM AND SEONGHWA CRYING WAS MY LAST REASON heres some more pics! mingi is SO fine. DAMNIT. break the wall fanchant was so loud, hopefully they come back! in a better location!

sass!

😭😭 san was trying really hard not to cry 😭😭

AND A QUIZ IM SURE YOULL LOVE

[vintagegoddess12]

The Ever After (4)

Relationship: Agatha Harkness x Reader

Summary: Agatha is getting more thirsty for the reader. Billy hears something.

The 50s

The 60s

The 70s

The 80s

Agatha laid her confusion to rest when she realized Wanda just pressed rewind on the whole town.

As she’s sitting in the backseat of the Vision’s family car, she thought back to your glitch moment. It looks like the town is on the fritz when Wanda is under stress - more so if it’s labor. The witch did not know if she was relieved that your memory slipped just because of the anomaly, or scared that you would remember her. She decided it was the former.

The new parents decided to bring their kids to a Westview resort for a little rest and recreation. Wanda also reasoned that they should celebrate five years’ worth of birthdays. The kids did nothing but cheer and zoom around their house before their departure, a fact known by Agatha since she can hear them all the way down to her basement.

“Aunt Agnes,” the 5-year-old twins rushed to hug her when she met up with them on their front lawn. Kids are a lot better when they’re not touching her, she thought to herself.

“How are my cute, oh so cute, boys?” She pinches their cheeks which made them giggle. 

Billy continued clinging to her while his twin answered, “I’ve got my floaties, Auntie.” Tommy reached for his inflatable donut and presented it to her. She pretended to be surprised as if she has not seen those so many times. Not two minutes into the trip but she’s already losing energy to deal with them. How are they so energetic? They’re only 9 hours old!

“Are we ready to have some fun in the sun?” Wanda cheered as she approached their car. Agnes feigned excitement and joined the kids in squealing. 

Vision eagerly loaded their luggage in the car and asked everyone to hop in. They all ran and took their seats, the nosy neighbor sandwiched between the kids on the back seat.

---

Their vehicle came to a stop when they reached the resort near the edge of town. Bringing the whole family here is pretty bold for the young ingenue, Agatha thought to herself. She decided it’s not up to her to ensure their safety from the surrounding force field, she might even be the cause of its breakdown. 

As the group walked inside the hotel, the kids who are full of energy once again zoomed around the hallways. Vision ran after them as Wanda took their keys from reception. Agnes trailed after her friend, making snarky comments about, you guessed it, her husband.

“Ralph insisted on staying home,” she puffed her now-era-appropriate curly hair while leaning close to Wanda, “says he’s not in a good mood to be under the sun.” 

“Oh no,” the young witch said half-heartedly.

“One of these days, I’m going to poison him with garlic and kill the vampire man that I think he is,” she affirmed with a laugh. Agatha, of course, knows that the food condiment doesn’t really kill vampires. You do it with a stake to their heart, but Agnes is not supposed to know that. 

“Maybe he’s just planning a surprise for you,” Wanda thought of all the sweet gestures Vision had prepared for her and smiled to herself. Always the romantic.

“Oh honeybun, the only way he can surprise me is if he washes his own dishes over the weekend,” Agnes was about to laugh at her statement when her eyes landed on a breathtaking Westview resident. “Speaking of surprises, who do we have here?” She called to the incoming figure, who immediately caught the flirty inflection in her voice. 

“Wanda, Agnes,” you beamed at them, missing the way Agatha appreciated your view. 

She watched as you approached them in the reception area, sunglass in your eyes and a summer drink on hand. Her eyes traveled from your head to toe, not missing the magenta one-piece swimsuit peeking through your black lace coverup. It was modest enough for the time period but not enough skin for the Salem witch. 

“[Y/N], I didn’t know you were here?” Wanda wondered if she had somehow instructed her closest friends to come and follow her here. She’s still confused as to how everything works in her Westview. 

“I needed a break from the mourning atmosphere in my house,” your attention darting between the two housewives, “so I decided to get some sun you know.” You took a sip from your drink, eyes meeting Agatha’s.

“By the looks of it, you can definitely get it,” Agnes winked and continued to hold your gaze, smirking at the spit take you did with your drink. 

“Agnes, you’re so naughty,” Wanda remarked, still not used to the flirty and forward nature of her friend. It made her remember Natasha, who was also flirty but for mission purposes. Agnes, on the other hand, uses it for fun which was definitely refreshing. 

The young witch wondered what her life would be like if she had met Agnes and you before all of this. Would you have been friends the same way? Traces of fear crept into her mind when she realized the two of you would either be dead because of her or loathe her. She feels like she’s found her tribe here, just like she did with the Avengers, but that too ended the same way: losing the ones she loved and fighting with the ones she cared for. 

She shook the feeling and focused on what was in front of her: Vision running around with their kids, friends who get her and are always beside her, and a town where she belongs. 

---

Settling in her room, Agatha can’t help but feel excited for her weekend. She’s spending time to know Wanda’s powers and she can keep you safe beside her. It’s as if this town is working in her favor. Or maybe Wanda is just an excellent scriptwriter. 

The witch was putting on her swimsuit, careful not to wear anything out of this time period when a knock from the door took her out of her reverie. She tried to determine who the person was but somehow her magic can’t identify who it is. Taking one last look in the mirror, making sure she’s still the hottest witch in town, she opened the door. It definitely showed on her face how surprised she was to see the woman who’s been plaguing her dreams recently.

“Wanda said I’d find you here,” your face scrunched up with a smile. 

“I didn’t know you were aching to see me.” Agnes pouted cheekily which made you smile even more.

“I was just going to ask you a favor.” She stepped aside, letting you into her room. “I don’t think aching is the word I would have used.”

  After closing the door, she turned to you and asked, “And what would you use, baby?” Her voice was low and sounded like a challenge. You opened your mouth, thinking of a reply, but no words come out. You blame it on the heat on your cheeks when she called you ‘baby.’ 

Agatha surely did not miss the sudden redness

“Can you let me finish?” you ask in between giggles.

You noticed how Agnes’s eyes darken, solely looking at you. It’s like watching a predator set its sights on its prey. You two were stuck in a staring match, both unwilling to first let go, when she stepped forward pinning you against the door.

“That depends, sweetie.” Her closeness clouding all your senses, “will you beg for it?”

You remained still against the door, feeling the heat consuming your body and the stark contrast of the cold golden metal on your ring finger. You tried to gather your thoughts, clearing your throat. 

“I think we have very different ideas of what favor means,” you say as you try to remain upright. The lack of distance between you two makes you wanna fall directly into her arms. 

Agatha gave you a once over before replying, “I bet we do.” She grinned, placing a hand on your waist, seeing how unsteady you have become in the past minute.

“Okay,” you pushed Agnes lightly to regain space, “I just came to ask if you want to get a massage downstairs because they said couples can avail of it for a discounted price. Wanda and Vision are getting it and I was supposed to get it but Herb sort of bailed on me.” 

You were visibly catching your breath when you saw jealousy paint Agnes’ face. 

The Salem Witch felt a pang of pain run through her, especially with the idea of Herb wooing you. She wanted to claim her territory right there and then. She can just push you to the bed or have her way with you against this very door. Any way to remind you that only she can touch you best. She was taken out of her thoughts when you shook her body a little. 

“Did you hear me, Agnes?”

It was her turn to gather her thoughts, to remove the images of you deep in pleasure that only she can cause. 

“Yes,” Agnes smiled, trying to regain the upper hand in the conversation, “massage downstairs.” You nodded as she continued. “What about Herb?”

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him since…” you trailed off, trying to make sense of the gap in memory you’re just realizing. When did you last see the guy?

Agatha can see the confusion you’re currently wrestling with, no doubt caused by the unstable magic of the young redhead and her affinity for sitcoms. 

“So should we go downstairs and get this massage train going?” Your neighbor enthusiastically reeling you back in reality. She offered her hand and you accepted. You both strut down the hallway, all care thrown into the wind.

You also passed by the twins' room, where Billy is in distress about the voices he keeps on hearing. They all scream one thing: he’s coming.

[hopeyallenjoy]

First time

Tell me the truth Severus. Don't you want me?

Pairing : Young Severus Snape x Fem!Reader 

Warnings : slights smut ; severus switch and reader switch ; dom/sub kink ; little bit of swearing ; alone at house ; bathroom teasing 

Wordcount : 3,504 words

Request : Marauder era Severus x reader’s first time 

Resume : That’s the same request as “An eventful birthday” but I did it with a more bold reader and only Severus' first time. Hope you’ll enjoy it just as much ! 

Y/l/n = Your last name Y/n = Your name 

"She asked you what?" said Lucius as he and Severus headed to their common room.

"She invited me to come spend the weekend at her house over the vacations," Severus repeated, rolling his eyes to the sky.

"Tell me mate, you've been dating Y/l/n for how long now?" Lucius as he opened the door to their dormitory.

"9 months." he replied.

"And you've already gone beyond a simple kiss? You know, despite what they say about young wizards, it's the young women who are the most hormone-driven. Think about it, Severus! That's why they're all so obsessed with love. They need a man and they need him to be their own to calm their ardor. And it's even truer for the veela.”

Severus shook his head negatively, setting his things down on his bed. Lucius couldn't help but smile mischievously at his friend.

"What are you getting at?" he asked when Malfoy didn't continue.

"My point is that she didn't invite you to chat. She wants you, Severus Snape, the dark male, to take over and make her your bitch.” Severus widened his eyes, not expecting such a revelation.

Was this really the case? You were a former student of Durmstrang Institute who had arrived at Hogwarts at the beginning of seventh year even though you were already of age. Because of the reputation of your former school, rumors about you had spread within a week of school, claiming that you were an accomplished black mage or a monster from the darkness, a cross between a veela and a vampire. You ended up in Slytherin, which wasn't entirely in your favor. You even had to deal with the most popular students in the school who were self-appointed protectors of Hogwarts and wanted to check the rumors.  Luckily for you, you were persuasive. You weren't a dark mage or a monster, but you had learned enough from Durmstrang to stand up for yourself and stop anyone from stepping on your toes.

After your little show of strength, girls started coming to you when a boy bothered them and guys who thought they were irresistible, like Lucius Malfoy or Sirius Black, came to try their luck with you. You'd packed them all, one by one. None of these boys were interesting for you, you only had eyes for your Potions and DADA partner, Severus Snape, the only one who didn't ogle your form even when he thought you didn't see him, the only one who shared your curiosity about dark magic, and especially the only one who didn't seem to be interested in you. That's what you liked about him, he really wasn't interested in you, or at least not more than in friendship, until you spent more and more time with him and finally confessed your love. 

In fact, you didn't really do that, you two just kissed on a full moon night in the astronomy tower and it was so natural between you that you just started acting like a couple. Holding hands during Hogsmeade outings or during classes, kissing for hours in your common room while all the other students were watching Quidditch matches, taking turns reading  poetry under the moonlight every night or so. In short, everything was done in a natural way, without the need for embarrassing confessions or the obligation to call each other ridiculous names. No, you had no obligation to each other, you just saw other as you pleased, doing the things you liked and it was just... perfect. 

The more Severus thought about it, the more he thought how stupid it would be to change that.

Add sex to such a perfect relationship? No way. It wasn't that he didn't find you attractive, on the contrary, he simply found you breath taking and sometimes wondered what such a beauty was doing by his side but he wasn’t sure that sex was for him. Sex was always something you grow tired of, and there was so much about it that he didn't know, he was sure he would disappoint you if you ever introduced sex to your relationship. Everything Severus Snape knew about sex, Lucius had told him, and if there was one thing he had learned from his friend's stories, it was that sex was complicated. 

Then when he presented himself in front of the door of the manor Y/l/n, he was well decided to keep his pants on. He knocked and expected to see one of your parents open the door for him, but he came face to face with your little face when the big door was fully opened. His eyes didn't leave your face but his peripheral vision allowed him to see that you were dressed a little lightly for the season, a simple t-shirt pulled over your tantalizing curves. He swallowed hardly. Keeping his pants on seemed much more difficult now. 

"Hello, Sev'. I see you're still on time. You'll excuse me, this time it's me who's a little late." you gave him your best smile and invited him to come in "My parents aren’t here so I took the opportunity to sleep in a little longer.”

Well, that wasn't entirely true, but he didn't need to know that, did he? You'd been up for a while and had spent the morning getting ready for the special weekend ahead. Despite the blasé expression you wore, inside you, your hormones and your heart were racing. Your little Severus was just beautiful and you were even more aware of it now that you saw him without his school uniform.

“Do you mind if I go put something on quickly?“ you asked without noticing the gleam of desire in the eyes of your companion. 

He shook his head negatively too happy that you propose of yourself to remove this angelic vision of which he had difficulty to get out. Merlin what you could be beautiful. You left to change your clothes after taking him into the great hall. Severus was trying to calm his imagination as he gazed out at the garden of your house that could be seen from the living room window. He was still standing there when you returned from your room, looking so absorbed that you had to pull him by the sleeve to get his attention. When he turned around he was breathless again. You had changed but your new outfit didn't help his case at all. You were now wearing a flowing black knee-length dress with a white corset that showed off your slim waist and gently carried your swaying breasts. If he was to believe what he saw, you weren't wearing a bra and he hoped... no panties either. 

"Severus...are you okay?" you questioned as he said nothing.

Severus quickly pulled himself together, serving you one of his grinning smiles that only he had the secret to. What was he talking about? Wasn't he the one who wanted to keep your relationship simple and natural? As recently as thirty minutes ago? And now he was the one who imagined you fucking on the floor, after having torn off your little black dress. This weekend was getting more and more complicated for him. He nodded nevertheless seeing the worried look that you threw to him, the back of your hand put on his forehead as if to see if he had a fever.

"Are you sure? You're all red?" he took your hand, squeezing it gently.

"Yes, yes. It's just your beauty that bewitches me," he said, placing a light kiss on your hand.

It was your turn to blush. Severus' compliments were rare and always came when you least expected them, so when he complimented you, you took full advantage. You kissed him tenderly.

"Idiot. You scared me."

He savored her words in turn, still not used to someone worrying about him and showing it.

"I should scare you more often if you kiss me like that every time" he murmured a sneer stretching his lips.

"You know very well that I would kiss you every day like that even if I wasn't worried. You just have to ask me or... do it on your own.”

At the fiery look you gave him, Severus stiffened and looked away a little.

"Do you have a chess set? It's been a long time since I've played against the grand queen of chess," he said in an attempt to divert your attention.

This worked in part, you nodded and went to get your chess set and then you sat down at the small table near the window. It was a hectic late afternoon of battles and verbal jousting, all of it friendly and good-natured. Even if your thoughts were turned to the particular behavior of your boyfriend. You wanted to wait for him to come and explain to you on his own what was the problem but you were sure he wouldn't. You didn't embarrass him with a serious discussion though, not wanting to spoil the wonderful weekend ahead. And you were right. Severus, on the other hand, was having a hard time concentrating, with hot scenarios taking up all his attention. If you had always been a bit daring, he had never noticed before, too busy admiring your little face or your knowledge of dark magic. And now he was biting his fingers, having the impression to rediscover the wild beauty that you were.

Laughing loudly, arm in arm, you entered the kitchen, your bellies rumbling. You brought in the leftovers from the night before and you gobbled them up in a few seconds, neither you nor he being picky in terms of food and it wasn't as if you had eaten mud, quite the contrary. 

It was your father who had made the food the day before. He had deliberately prepared more food than he needed, not wanting to leave his princess without food during the long weekend he was going to spend away from you.Because yes, you had fought for your parents, especially your father, to leave you at the mansion alone. Yet they knew you could handle yourself, after six consecutive years at Durmstrang, it was rare not to know how to handle yourself. 

The meal was just as nerve-wracking for Severus as he couldn't help but make you laugh which made your breasts jiggle under the thin fabric of your dress. You even bent down to grab the pepper on the table which allowed him to see that you were indeed not wearing a bra. He almost choked, his imagination and hormones still running wild. By the end of the meal, Severus was convinced that he was going to lose his mind before the end of the weekend if it continued like this.

"Y /n, could I know where the bathroom is? I'd like to take a shower before I go to sleep, if that's possible," Severus asked, convinced that a nice cold shower would put his mind at ease.

"Oh, of course. The bathroom is upstairs. It's the first door on the left. Do you need me to lend you something? Slippers, a nightgown?” you asked as a particularly Machiavellian idea appeared in your mind.

At this point of the evening, you had understood that your boyfriend, who you thought was so innocent, had started to understand that you were no longer a child and that your body was indeed the one of a young adult. Seeing him almost choke at each movement you made and that revealed a little more of your forms, was, it had to be said, a most amusing spectacle. So you let him go up the stairs to the bathroom and slowly followed him once the plates were washed and put away.

Meanwhile, Severus had slipped out of his black clothes and into the bathtub, which was filled to the brim. It wasn't every day that he could afford a nice hot bath and he was sure you wouldn't mind if he took a few drops of the Muggle lotions that adorned the rim of the big tub. He slipped all the way into the water, after a deep breath, desperate to calm his ardor. If Severus Snape was so determined not to give in to temptation it was mainly due to the bad treatment he had received from the Marauders, humiliating him to the point where his body was dripping and he was unable to touch himself, even alone. So how could he have succeeded in maintaining a carnal relationship with anyone? Love, love was different, he felt it and managed to express it, but sex? Very little for him. Finally, this afternoon spent by your side had shown him that even if the thing seemed inconceivable to him, he was still capable of desiring someone. And to want you, he wanted you really bad. He opened his eyes, his head still immersed in the bathtub, and saw through the water a figure towering over him. He emerged from the water recognizing your little face. 

There you were, standing in front of him, you had left your corset behind and were now wearing only your black dress. Your face was still impassive.

"Y/n? What the..." he began.

"Sev', do you love me?" you didn't let him finish, starting your Machiavellian plan. "Because I'm starting to doubt it, you know? You've been acting weird ever since you got here. So tell me the truth, Severus. Don't you want me?" as you spoke his words, you let your robe slip off at your feet showing yourself completely naked to him. 

Severus could not believe his eyes. In that moment, he couldn't stop his eyes from devouring you, his cheeks from turning red, and his sex from growing. The fire that swept over him was so sudden that it took his breath away. You were satisfied with your little effect, but when Severus didn't move, just clung to the edge of the tub, you slid as sensually as possible into the bath without taking your eyes off him. Severus watched you, holding his breath. Yes, you were definitely going to drive him crazy. 

"-Severus, how do I look?" you asked again as he still hadn't said anything.

"Y/n... You don't know what you're saying. I... I want you so much, you can't even imagine how much but..." Severus was short of breath, "I've never done anything, never even t-touched myself. I wouldn't know how to... I wouldn't know how to do it and I could only..." you cut him off, kissing him gently as tears of frustration flooded down his face.

 You felt a little bad now that you knew the truth. You had never wanted to made him cry but you understood that he needed to cry so you let him, kissing his cheeks, his nose, his eyes, in fact, everything that was within your reach, wanting to reassure him a maximum.

"Shhhhh Sev'... It's okay, don't worry. I'm here.  Shhhhhh... Oh boy ! I could never be disappointed in you, Sev' I assure you. So please don't cry anymore. I hate seeing you like this. I love you so much, you know." you continued to kiss him with your arms around his neck.

"I-i love you so much t-too ," he replied between sobs. 

Severus was drowning in your affection, his whole body burning. He felt so good in your arms, covered in your kisses. You covered him with tender kisses for another moment, telling him how beautiful he was in your eyes between two kisses. Once the sadness passed, he wanted to return your affection, covering the zebra skin of your breasts with soft kisses which felt like butterfly wings. Then the butterflies became more urgent as your hand clung to his ebony hair and your lips let out sighs of pleasure. You pulled your lover's face up to steal a passionate kiss, your two foreheads finally pressed together, your body slightly elevated as Severus had his arms around your waist.

"Do you... do you want to go all the way Sev'? I certainly don't want to force you to do anything you don’t want, love."

How? Weren't you supposed to not give him ridiculous nicknames? I don't remember saying that. Severus nodded, pulling you tighter against him.

"Guide me, Y/n," he breathed.

His voice was infused with desire, as was his entire body. He was overflowing and tense with desire beyond your touch. You placed his hands in the places you knew were your pleasure points, guiding him to know what to do. His lips came to rest on your neck as you told him to, as your hands slid gently through the cool bath water to land on his crotch. It may have been hard to believe but Severus Snape was very well built, his sex was moderate in size but not all the way down, his base and glans were wider than the rest. It was also slightly curved towards the glans. If you hadn't already had other relationships you wouldn't have realized just by touching him, that Severus was just perfect for you. Your fingers began to do him good, drawing grunts from him that made your skin tingle as he didn't stop his attentions. When you felt him grow a little larger in your hands you stopped your stroking, spreading your own legs just enough for him to enter.

"Severus... I want to cum with you..." he understood the invitation taking his sex in his hands and positioning it facing the entrance to your pussy. 

He didn't really know what to do once he entered so it was you who guided him again, initiating back and forth, impaling yourself a little more each time, your hands resting on his shoulders. Severus moaned with each return, feeling your insides react to his member. You weren't especially tight, but he was still able to fill you up completely. You guided him for a moment and then he felt confident enough to take over. Slowly but surely, he varied the strength of his thrusts. Then he added his lips in your neck making you plant your nails in his shoulders when a so good and... unexpected pleasure. Instinctively, he squeezed you tighter as the last thrust inside you came accompanied by waves of immeasurable pleasure. He had finished before you but you were so close to cumming that you couldn't stop a groan of frustration from coming out of your mouth.

"This one is different from the others. Did I hurt you?" Severus fretted as he came to stop, causing you to let out another frustrated moan.

"No, no, no ! I... Can you go on a little longer, please? I'm not far..." you whispered in his ear. 

He undulated his pelvis gently under you, a sneer coming to perch on his lips.

 "What exactly do you want, Y/n? I need you to explain it to me precisely, please. I don't think I'm experienced enough yet to understand your demands without you finishing your sentences," he said, kissing your temple. 

He knew perfectly well what he was doing now. You wanted to protest by realizing it but it had started again to undulate under you, letting out of your mouth only words drowned between your moans. He ended up kissing your temple again, letting you breathe and waiting for your answer. 

"I want you to fuck me until... Until I cum Severus, please!" you finally managed to articulate making Severus' smile grew wider and wider.

"Gladly, love," he replied as he began to pound you again.