#in my defense it was really noisy so I doubt they heard me that well anyway so

[sandwhich-lady]

Currently thinking about the time that I insisted to my parents that we go to knotts scary farm, completely underestimated the scare factor, and was scared shitless the entire time

Went to the first haunted house, hated it, didn’t go into another one until near the end of our trip and it was one of those interactive one where you get a weapon and stuff, and I got the bright idea that reciting a monologue from the play I was doing (shout out to The Passage by Robert Lawson) would help me get through it and be less scared (it did)

So shout out to the scare actors that had to deal with a 15 year old theatre kid scared out of their mind firing a toy gun at them while screaming “AT SEA ONE DAY. YOULL SEE LAND WHERE THERE IS NO LAND. AND ON THAT DAY AHAB SHALL GO TO HIS GRAVE. AND ALL, ALL SAVE ONE WILL FALL”

[jodilin65]

We decided our first weapon of defense against Ray’s TV (we suspect he got a new surround system or something since this is a new twist on things), would be to put back up the soundproofing material on the outer bedroom and closet walls. Admittedly, I’ve been wanting to do it anyway because it would be good for other sounds like mowers, traffic, planes, and storms.

I don’t know why he’s doing this shit all of a sudden since many times I’d be outside and not hear anything from over there but this is still so typical like I said in my last entry with good neighbors getting noisy.

If this doesn’t work - and I have my doubts - I will talk to him. At first I was hesitant to even think of that because past experiences really put a complex on me and I know that most people don’t take well to complaints no matter how reasonable they may be. I have every right not to hear his TV in my home. I know that and he probably knows it too but that’s likely not how he’s going to react. If he’s like most people, he’ll react as if I asked him to kill all his loved ones and then himself. If he doesn’t and he does turn it down, it will likely only be temporary and there’s a chance he may do something else to annoy me like get a yappy dog or a loud vehicle even if it’s a subconscious thing he doesn’t even realize he’s doing.

If he continues to be a problem after soundproofing and talking to him, I’ll go to the office. If they won’t help, then I’ll go over there and smash the fucking thing. LOL, okay, maybe I won’t go that far but I’ll have to do something if matters are going to be left in my own hands. Really hope it doesn’t come to that, though! The last thing I want to do is go back to dealing with an annoying neighbor I have to listen to hour after hour. He’s not as loud as the guy at the old place that blasted his TV before he died but right now I’m lying in bed, the air cleaner in the living room is up high which is not too far outside the bedroom door, yet I can still make it out.

Again, past experiences backfiring on me made me hesitant to say anything but if we can’t block him out, I’m not gonna let the assholes of the past win and say nothing either. When one of my Facebook friends said she was participating in a women’s rights rally, I asked her what the point was since protests and rallies never do any good. She said it was all about being heard and making their thoughts known, and that the more people that speak up, the more others will know what’s really on people’s minds. If everyone assumes their one voice won’t make a difference and keeps quiet, then there’s less hope of any change for the better in the future.

The guy’s not home as much as we are but he’s home a lot and all he does when he’s awake from what I can tell is watch TV. He doesn’t crash till around 11:00. There’s a gap in the side of our blinds in the window that faces his living room and I can usually tell when he’s up at night. I can make out the faint flickering of the TV. But now I know when it’s on just because I can hear the damn thing in here and I would really like him to return to his old self where he was too good to be true.

I don’t know for sure if it’s a new TV or if it’s just that typical ‘I’m here, I’m settled, and now I’m going to do what I want and fuck everyone around me’ attitude so many people have after they move. The question is whether or not the soundproofing is going to be enough. I sure hope so but manufactured homes are pretty flimsy and they let sound in so easily. Remember, we’re not even on a concrete slab so sound can also come up through the floor or ceiling, and it’s all wood and no brick or stucco or anything like that.

I’m just tired of having to do this or do that in my own house because of neighbors. Even so, we talked about putting the soundproofing blanket in the window above the built-in desk because we’re not soundproofing that area, and I can’t use that computer with the larger screen until after the damn cock goes to bed. That’s not as big of a deal because I’m not usually out there until around midnight anyway because of the planes. Right now I’m in my closet office with Alexa playing nature sounds.

I opened my sound measuring app. When turning off all the fans and air cleaners inside the house, it registered at about 35 decibels in the closet and 33 in the bedroom, since we already have soundproofing material in the windows.

Good and bad health news, as usual. I slept surprisingly well last night despite swearing a thump woke me up for a second early in the morning, and have had good energy throughout the day and was able to sort some stuff in the second bathroom like I’ve been planning to do for a while.

The not-so-good news is that I finally broke down and scheduled an appointment with the GYN for the 24th because I’m still burning.

Also, my weight is up half a pound so it likely was the medication ramping up in my system that pushed it down in the first place just like I always suspected. At least I had no problems with the new brand of losartan.

[lerrryyyyy]

Shiketsu!Izuku AU

With hints of possible krbk and tddk in the future. Mostly focuses on friendship between Izuku & Katsuki, as well as throwing the people around them for a loop with their dynamic.

(This is more of a one-shot idea… but I doubt I’d get around to actually writing this properly so I’m just gonna turn it into a post)

Also ft sassy Izuku who he grew up having a close relationship with Katsuki.

He’s more confident, a bit more blunt, and though still being a soft cheerful boy, he does adopt a few of Katsuki’s behaviours.

Not yet sure if Izuku is quirkless or if he has a non-physical quirk. And I’m undecided on why he’s in Shiketsu, but that’s not that important.

Set during the Provisional Exams.

Bakugo initially ignores everything around him, only interacting with his group of friends - mostly with Kirishima. But when Yoarashi approaches their group, his mood instantly changes. He asks where the other Shiketsu students are.

Yoarashi - obviously a bit confused at the question - points at the group making their way towards them.

1A shifts warily when a competitive grin spreads across Bakugo’s face and, before anyone could stop him, he launches towards the Shiketsu students with a loud scream of “DEKU!”

1A dreads the train-wreck about to happen, but one of the Shiketsu students dashes forward to meet Bakugo’s attack and deftly grabs his arm and flips him.

But Bakugo seems to be ready for this and shifts his body so he could off-balance the other student, but the latter pulls away before Bakugo could complete his move.

It all happens so fast that, by the time anyone moves to stop them, the exchange has already ended with the Shiketsu student using his own momentum to latch onto Bakugo’s back.

“Why can’t you ever greet me normally, Kacchan?” The boy asks with a pout.

Bakugo snorts and, much to his classmate’s surprise, he lets the guy cling to him as he walks back to get the case for his hero costume. “I had to make sure you weren’t slacking off or I would’ve beaten your ass to the ground.”

”The last time we sparred, I wasn’t the one beaten to the ground, Kacchan.”

“Then why don’t you get off my back and I’ll--!”

Before they could continue their conversation, however, Aizawa’s sharp tone cuts through the air. “Bakugo.”

Bakugo clicks his tongue, but the Shiketsu student lights up in recognition.

“Kacchan! Oh my All Might, Kacchan! Kacchan! Your teacher is Eraserhead!”

This seems to catch Aizawa off-guard - not many people knew him after all.

“I already told you that, dumbass.”

“But Kacchan! Why didn’t you get me an autograph?!”

“Fuck off. Ask him yourself.”

“Aha! So you’re the infamous Kacchan!” Yoarashi exclaims loudly. “Midoriya has told me about you!”

“Don’t call me that, you fucking extra!”

1A is just basically shocked to see Bakugo actually having a friend who was used to his attitude and takes his threats with a smile. A friend who seems to be the complete opposite of him.

Also imagine a little interaction where Midoriya sees Kirishima and greets him.

“You’re Kirishima-san! It’s so nice to finally meet you! Kacchan talks about you a lot!”

Kirishima perks up. “He does?”

“No I fucking don’t! Shut up!”

While waiting for the exam to start, some of 1A talk to Izuku and try to get to know him, intrigued by his relationship with the explosive member of their class. But the introductions are cut short as the examiner starts explaining the rules.

When the arena opens and examinees start to split up, Midoriya wishes them all luck before running off with his schoolmates.

“Good luck, UA! See you later, Kacchan! Be nice to your classmates.”

“Fuck you, Deku.” He yells while sending him the middle finger.

But he doesn’t get far when Midoriya calls him again.

"Hey Kacchan!” Bakugo turns around to see Midoriya on that noisy Shiketsu extra’s back, smiling angelically while sending him the rude gesture in return as they fly off. “Bye!”

The other Shiketsu students choke on air, staring at the green-haired boy in shock. "Midoriya!"

Several of 1A snicker at the angry scream that escapes the depths of hell that was their classmate’s throat.

“I like your friend, Bakugo.” Uraraka manages to say between giggles.

“Whatever.” Bakugo growls while stomping off, with Kirishima and Kaminari rushing after him.

Later, before the 2nd part of the exams, Todoroki happens to overhear Yoarashi and Midoriya talking - the topic being him. His fist clenches when he hears the former compare him to Endeavor. He starts to walk away when he picks up on Midoriya’s words.

“Todoroki-san isn’t Endeavor. Yoarashi-kun, if you’re gonna dislike him, dislike him for himself. Not because of his father.”

“But I do! He was rude during the recommendation test! Just like when Endeavor—"

“You’re comparing them again. You don’t have to bring up his father when you’re upset with Todoroki-san.” Midoriya sighs. “Really, Yoarashi-kun, I’ve heard people say ruder things to you, but you don’t bear grudges like this against them.”

He gives the taller student a look that was almost a mix between exasperation and admonishing. “Just... try not to let it influence you during the exam, okay Yoarashi-kun? You have a tendency to be unknowingly petty.”

Yoarashi splutters at the accusation but doesn’t refute it.

During the rescue portion of the exams when Gang Orca attacks. Yoarashi and Todoroki still argue.

Midoriya notices this and tries to intervene, but Gang Orca’s minions distract him from doing so. Thankfully, Bakugo, Kirishima, and Kaminari arrive at the scene.

Bakugo tells Kirishima and Kaminari to help in the evacuation. They ask what he’s planning, but he’s already off fighting the ‘villains’. They are momentarily frozen in surprise and awe when Bakugo and Midoriya seamlessly work together in fighting the hoard.

Then a flame tornado - courtesy of Inasa and Todoroki - rises around Gang Orca. It holds the hero at bay, but the tornado subsides quicker than expected. Bakugo and Midoriya take that opportunity to fight Gang Orca - their formidable teamwork impressing the hero.

But the timer soon goes off. After a bit of gushing (because of course he can’t help himself from fanboying a tiny bit), Midoriya approaches Yoarashi and Todoroki and gives them a look. With the way Yoarashi shamefully avoids his gaze, Izuku could guess what happened.

He sighs and approaches Todoroki to help him up - which surprises the two.

“Midoriya?” Yoarashi speaks up.

Midoriya ignores him. “Hey, Kacchan, sorry but can you help Yoarashi-kun up? I’ll take Todoroki-san.”

“Tsch... you owe me.”

When Bakugo has Yoarashi leaning against him, he grunts. “Congrats, airhead, whatever the fuck you did, you upset Deku.”

Yoarashi could do nothing but tuck his chin ruefully.

While Izuku takes Todoroki to the medics to get looked over, Todoroki breaks the silence.

“Did you mean what you said? About me not being my father?”

“Y-you heard that?”

Todoroki stares at him intensely, making Midoriya squirm a bit. “... well? Did you?”

“Oh, uhm, yeah... Endeavor-san is Endeavor-san and Todoroki-san is Todoroki-san. You’re your own person. It just seems unfair to dislike you because of your father.”

Todoroki jolts slightly, his voice going cold and defensive “What do you mean?”

Midoriya almost jumps at the change in his tone. “I mean, who Endeavor is isn’t who you are, and I don’t think people should base their judgement of you on who your father is or what he’s done before.”

Todoroki looks at Midoriya - his expression now unreadable, but there’s something in his eyes that seem contemplative.

“You’re strange.”

“Ah, sorry I—“

“I didn’t say it was a bad thing.”

“O-oh... thanks?”

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Just an omake/extra kind of thing: Todoroki approaching Bakugo before boarding their bus.

“Bakugo.”

“What do you want, half-and-half?”

“Your friend is interesting.”

“Ha?! Deku? The hell did he do this time?”

“He has some... intriguing opinions. I’d like to talk to him more. Can you get me in touch with him?”

“What the fuck?!”

[yslkook]

red card - on the defensive (1)

pairing: jungkook x reader (soccer captain jjk) summary: you and jungkook run in the same circles, and yet after three years, he struggles to get your time of day. you think he’s cocky and he’s going to change your mind. word count: 5.1k warnings: cursing, alcohol/drinking (lots of it), suggestive content a/n: this story is for @cutechim​, it went down in the DM’s and came to life. this is my entry into the blond jk foray!! enjoy<3

red card masterlist

“What should we drink?” Hana shouts over the music to you in the crowd.

“Uh… let’s do jagerbombs,” You shout back, even though you’re both relatively close to each other at the bar. You peer behind you at the group of people you’ve congregated with this afternoon, counting a total of four. 

“Can I have… eight jagerbombs?” You request of the bartender, who raises his eyebrow at you.

“Why am I not surprised,” He says with a roll of his eyes, “You’re all gonna run me dry of my jager.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time it happened,” You mutter. And you’re right- it’s happened at least twice over this summer, when you and your friends made a weekly appearance to this bar. The bartender knows you and Hana by your faces at this point and you’ve jokingly asked why your usual order of jagerbombs or tequila shots aren’t ready upon arrival.

These weekly occurrences were sponsored by your job at a law firm near your university. And by sponsored, you mean that your bank account takes a minor hit on a weekly basis. Since university had let out, you’d made yourself available for as many hours as possible- after all, you needed a way to fund these days and nights out.

While juggling a summer class three days a week for three hours each day.

But you weren’t completely financially irresponsible- you drew the line… eventually. Certainly not after eight jagerbombs though (you’d stopped questioning how you could easily drop that much money on alcohol these days). At least it's summer happy hour and you’re not paying full price.

Besides, you and your friends rotate rounds. Hana will get the next one, and then one of the guys, and so on and so forth. You’d gotten two extra specially for you and Hana, but nobody needed to know that.

You love these summer days, when it’s nothing but you and your friends enjoying the breeze and the vibes of a fun afternoon (that inevitably leads to a night of more recklessness). Nothing can take the tipsy grin off of your face or the arm looped around your best friend’s shoulders, except-

Park Jimin, Kim Taehyung, and Jeon Jungkook.  You don’t mind Jimin as much (mostly because of Hana, who’s been harboring a not so secret crush that is definitely bordering more on love than a simple crush on him for who knew how long). But still, when all three of them are together, you make your disdain very known and obvious. At least you think you do.

Some of the star players from your university’s soccer team, and the captain himself, Jeon Jungkook. They walk into the crowded, noisy bar as if they own the place and you can already see heads turning. You roll your eyes and tell Hana to get it together when she starts giggling and waving at Jimin.

Your eyes seem to meet the back of your skull when all three of them saunter over towards you and your friends. It’s not that you have anything against them per se, it’s that you find them as a unit quite annoying and you know of their reputations. Or, you think you know of their reputations. Maybe you’re a little judgmental. But who cares, it’s not any of their business.

Most of your perhaps misplaced vitriol is reserved for Jungkook himself and the few interactions that you’ve had over the last almost four years of being in university together. You’ve had a few general ed classes with him freshman year, but after that most of your interactions were solely at parties and any excuse to celebrate. You had mutual friends (somehow) so it was inevitable that you saw him as much as you did.

Every fiber of him annoyed you- he was cocky and arrogant… Everything you intensely disliked in a person. Hana told you that you were being mean and judgmental (not as nicely), but if it meant not dealing with this boy who got a rise out of you for no reason, then it didn’t matter. Of course, he doesn’t take up space in your mind very often. Only when you have the misfortune of running into him.

You didn’t know him, and truly, you didn’t care to. You’ll remain civil though, only if he doesn’t annoy you. Which you doubt will happen.

Jungkook can sense your iciness towards him and his friends from half a mile away, from across the bar. And the bar itself is pretty big, with an outdoor area and an outdoor dance floor, and two bars inside with tables and booths and a dance floor. Despite the space of the bar, it’s crowded with college students, young professionals, and even older corporate workers who look like they work relatively close to the bar. He knows you and your friends come here often, and if that was why he had suggested to Jimin and Tae that they also come here then that was his business.

He swallows (not nervously). You look so pretty when you laugh, he thinks. He thinks you look pretty all the time, though. He lets his eyes wander to your tight black crop top shirt with cherries printed on it and your high waisted denim shorts. Jungkook’s throat goes a little dry when his gaze reaches your thighs, but he keeps it together somehow. He doesn’t know how, considering how nice that outfit makes your tits look.

“Hey Cherries,” Jungkook says smoothly, “Flattered you got this for me.” And he plucks the jagerbomb that you paid for for yourself and downs it in less than three seconds. 

Your jaw drops. The audacity of this boy.

“First of all,” You narrow your eyes, “Who the fuck is a ‘Cherries’. And second of all, I know you didn’t just drink the drink that I paid for. Right in front of my fuckin’ face.”

“That’s a funny way of asking me to buy you a drink, Cherries,” Jungkook grins, and gazes at your chest for a second too long. You roll your eyes and swat his arm.

“I’m not asking. I’m telling you. I’ll have a tequila shot, pretty boy,” You smirk at him and he smirks right back at you.

“I like a girl who knows what she wants,” Jungkook attempts, only for you to scoff.

“Congratulations,” You say flatly, “You’re lucky I’m not subjecting you to getting me two tequila shots for having to hear that line.”

“You don’t like my lines?” He’s pouty and his eyes are wide, mischief sparkling in them. You dare to think that he’s cute. Apparently all of the boys had dyed their hair blond this summer before the soccer season began and you must admit that it suits him. His hair falls over his forehead effortlessly, small hoops dangling from his ears as he smiles at you.

“Does anyone? Do your groupies?”

“Maybe I’m a little rusty…”

“Oh, I doubt that, Jungkook.”

“Well, you notice whether I have groupies or not, so maybe I’m not so rusty, Cherries,” Jungkook winks at you and you’re tempted to toss your drink at him. But that’s a precious waste of alcohol and perhaps you’re a little dramatic.

You only groan and accept the tequila shot, quickly licking your hand to place salt on and taking a wedge of lime.

“Ready?” Jungkook asks after doing the same.

“How lucky for me, that I get to do shots with our star quarterback,” You say flatly.

“That’s football, Cherries. I play soccer.”

“And I don’t care. Now, take this shot with me.”

As the afternoon blends into evening, you witness betrayal in front of your very eyes in the form of Hana inviting Jimin and his friends with you to the next bar. The ultimate betrayal.

But really, you’ve heard about those soccer boys. At least you think you have. Perhaps you know everything. Perhaps you know nothing at all.

And so the three boys follow you to the next bar as the night goes on. Nearly everyone was at least tipsy by this point, as you had all done a handful of shots following the boys’ arrival at the first bar.

You find yourself thinking that they’re not so bad, when they make you and your friends laugh easily and when being around them feels… fun. 

It’s easy to blame on the alcohol and the darkness of the crowded bar. It seems like everyone is out and about, the streets filled with college students and young professionals looking to unwind and let off some steam.

You love the feeling of the music pumping through your veins, along with the swirl of alcohol. You’re not ashamed of enjoying a drink (or several) and having a good time.

Even if it almost always results in you crossing the line and being hungover the next day.

“Wanna do shots,” You suggest to your circle of friends, eyes landing on Jungkook without you meaning to. Maybe it’s a hidden challenge and he raises his eyebrows.

“Again?” Jungkook says incredulously.

“Don’t be surprised,” Jimin mutters under his breath to Jungkook, “She’s kinda crazy.”

“I’ll take that as a yes… six shots then?” You say cheerily, ignoring Jungkook’s groan. You vaguely recall that Taehyung doesn’t really drink. How considerate of you.

Hana’s arm is slung around your shoulders, a bright (drunken) smile on her face as you pass shots behind you.

The following week, on your usual day of happy hour drinking, Hana presents you with a proposition that has you gasping and gagging, nearly writhing on the floor.

“No, for your information, I do not want to pregame at the soccer house. Thanks for asking, try again later,” You say definitively, pouring Hana a drink.

“Jimin invited us! I wanna see him,” Hana complains and pouts at you, “He said they got good alcohol for the pregame-”

“Jimin invited you, because you both like each other or whatever,” You roll your eyes, “I’m content to drink here alone-”

“We both know you’ll fall asleep if I leave you alone,” Hana says flatly, “Besides, Jungkook asked if you were coming.”

“And what do I care if Jungkook asked if I was coming?” You scoff, taking a long swig of the strong drink in your red solo cup. You cringe.

“He specifically asked if Cherries was coming,” Hana says with a near maniacal grin, “Pretend all you want that you don’t like that shit. Now go wear that top with cherries on it that makes your tits look nice. Quit being difficult.”

In the end, you end up walking the four blocks to the soccer house and you wear the baby pink long sleeved crop top with cherries on it and denim shorts, much to your chagrin (and to Hana’s delight). You’ve only been here a handful of times (maybe two or three) as a freshman for parties and hadn’t been back since.

Everyone knew the soccer house was the place to party to get shitfaced. Usually, the sophomore and junior year soccer players lived in the house while senior year players moved off campus.

You don’t know who currently lives at the house, but Hana quickly fills you in. Apparently Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook lived together off campus (because of course they did).

The soccer house has been part of the campus lore for years. Allegedly, all of the craziest, most reckless things happened at the soccer house and all of the best parties were there. You and Hana never felt that way freshman and sophomore year, instead opting to party hop at the frat houses rather than the sports houses.

How the tables have turned.

“You made it!” Jimin exclaims, outstretching his arms for a hug from you. Which you (awkwardly) return. You need more alcohol to be here, you think.

“Yeah, only ‘cause Hana told me you guys got the good shit,” You say flatly. Taehyung passes a cup of something and you eye it suspiciously but ultimately take a swig of it.

“Pretty good, Tae,” You say, raising your cup to him.

“Oh, I didn’t make that. I’m only the messenger,” Taehyung shrugs with a sly grin, “Jungkook over there did.”

You turn your head, only to find Jungkook staring back at you, lips upturned in a playful grin. It makes you roll your eyes, as most of his antics do.

“Hey, Cherries,” Jungkook greets, standing next to you after a few long strides, “It only took Jimin asking you once to come here, huh? I should be offended, considering how many times I’ve asked you-”

“And when have you ever asked me to party here, Jungkook?”

He only gives you a small smile, almost shy, and it’s a stark contrast from the generally cocky aura that hangs around him. “You just don’t remember.”

You frown a little, wondering what that means. But he gives you another broad smile quickly, shaking you from your reverie. Jungkook leaves you to your devices, being pulled away by some of the younger soccer guys that you hardly recognize. Freshmen? Sophomores, maybe? They look at Jungkook and the older guys with a playful sort of reverence- it’s clear that the team is close even off of the field. 

You briefly wonder what that’s like- having a group of friends like that. Hana’s always been the nicer, more outgoing one out of you both. She’s always made friends easily, with her sweet and genuine smiles. And then there’s you- you struggle to open up to others, always greeting anyone with the sting of sarcasm and holding people at arm’s length.

Sometimes, very rarely, you wonder how you and Hana mesh well together. When she could have a big group of great friends, you used to wonder if you hold her back somehow. It was stupid, and the first time you voiced your insecurity to Hana, she had smacked you upside the head and told you that you were stuck with her.

But still. You can’t help but feel burdensome sometimes. Maybe like you’re too much. Maybe not enough.

Hana pulls you out of your thoughts easily, an arm around your shoulder as she pulls you into conversation with Jimin and a few other girls. 

You down about half the cup of whatever concoction Jungkook whipped up for you and tried to immerse yourself in conversation. There’s a new girl here that you don’t recognize, Sunmi. She’s a transfer and the last thing you want is for her to feel left out. So you make sure to include her in the conversation and ask her questions, too.

Jungkook is not surprised that you don’t remember how many times he’s asked you to come party at the soccer house. Granted, it’s only been a handful of times over the last three years and change. It’s not like you were a stranger- he’s known you through a few mutual classes through the years, and through Jimin, too. After all, Jimin and your best friend have had this weird on and off, together but not together thing going on since the summer before sophomore year.

Maybe one of these days, they’ll get it together. Jungkook loves Hana for Jimin and vice versa- he’s never seen either smile as much as they do around each other. If only they would just admit how much they like (love) each other and put everyone around them out of their misery.

Jungkook thinks it’s a little romantic. Being so in love with someone that labels aren’t needed. There’s something poetic about that.

But Jungkook doesn’t know why you act like you don’t know him at all. You always greet him with a near frown or a roll of your shining eyes.

He doesn’t understand but he pays it no mind, instead turning his focus to the pretty woman eyeing him from the other side of the bar with her friends.

(She’s not you, but it doesn’t matter. Jungkook pushes you to the back of his mind, instead choosing to focus on the velvet heat of the woman in his bed later that night.)

With your shift at the law firm starting at 9 AM the following morning, you decide to remain relatively sober for the night (you enjoy a good time, but you try to draw the line when you can. Though there have been times when you’ve gone to work hungover or possibly even still intoxicated. It happens every so often. You’ve never claimed to be the paradigm of a working college student.)

But also, you don’t really feel like being out tonight to begin with. You do enjoy nights like this, but you also enjoy your quiet time. And it seems like this is one of those nights.

At least someone’s having fun, you think dryly, your eyes glossing over Jimin and Hana. You do think they’d be a great match- if only either of them would make it official. This dance that they’ve been doing for years frustrates you and Hana knows it. You’ve voiced it to her many times but she always says it’s not the right time.

It makes you roll your eyes. You briefly wondered if you should host an intervention and scold Jimin for taking too long- after all, if they kept playing games like this then who’s to say one of them wouldn’t move on? But it seems like they both always gravitate to each other no matter what.

He rotates around her axis and she rotates around his. It’s sweet but Jimin still puts a sour taste in your mouth for a reason that you can’t verbalize into words.

Maybe it’s the company he keeps. 

The music is loud in your ears as you dance with your group of friends, two of them in an impromptu dance off that you inevitably get dragged into. You sling your arm around Sunmi and nudge hips with her, getting her to come out of her shell a little bit and dance with her on the dance floor. She sings to the same songs as you do and gives you a bright, happy smile that you can’t help but return.

You buy a round of beers for your friends before the first yawn comes, not even at 1 AM. Hana looks at you quizzically.

You keep checking your phone for the time. Which in itself is pretty out of character for you. But you just need a recharge before the next outing…..

But you suck it up, not wanting to leave Sunmi by herself. You fight through your yawns and nurse your beer, twirling and swirling around with Sunmi.

And then you start to get hungry. Damn, you could go for some tacos right now.

“Hey,” Sunmi shouts over the music, “Wanna get food?”

“Wow, you read my mind,” You grin and chug your beer quickly. You and Sunmi both settle on the bar across the street (with the best tacos). You turn to find your friends and let them know that you’re heading across the street. Jimin and Hana both nod eagerly, Taehyung does, too.

You debate if you should ask Jungkook if he wants food- after all, it looks like he’s busy with a girl currently sending him sultry heart eyes. 

“Hey, we’re going to get food. Wanna come?” You ask, “You, too.” You look at the pretty girl who looks familiar. She probably attends the same university as you and your friends. 

Jungkook’s ears perk up at the mention of food, even with the girl currently standing in between his legs. She looks wary for a minute and before you can reassure her, Jungkook speaks up.

“Sure. I could go for some tacos,” Jungkook says, “Let’s get some tacos, Nari.”

“Are you sure, I mean I don’t want to impose. We can catch up later, Kook,” Nari says unsurely.

Jungkook will admit, this feels weird for a reason that he can’t place. The girl he’s trying to hook up with for the night getting tacos with the girl he might have a slight crush on. 

Weird. But still, there’s no harm in just having tacos.

“Trust me, you’re not imposing, Nari. I barely even like this guy,” You joke, “I’m just a big proponent of tacos and tacos should never be eaten alone. Tell your friends too, if they wanna come.”

“Hey!” 

You ignore Jungkook to reassure Nari and give her a bright smile. Nari looks at you, and then Jungkook before nodding slowly and returning your smile.

Jungkook walks Nari out with a hand at the small of her back, something you don’t miss as you chat away with Nari about anything and everything.

You even shoot Jungkook a wink when Nari isn’t looking. He groans internally- how poetic. His current crush giving him the approval of his hook up for the night (Nari knew what the deal was).

How incredibly awkward. Jungkook is capable of many things, always adapting to situations. But this is a new one and when Jimin and Taehyung catch his eye at the taco shop, they both give him a derisive smile.

Jungkook can only groan internally and eat his tacos.

Today’s Wednesday night is uneventful- Hana is with Jimin for the evening and they are likely going out with some friends. You had opted out, as you had an early shift at the law firm tomorrow morning. You’ve gone out the night before early shifts and early classes and more than half the time, you regret it the next day.

Does it mean you’ll stop those habits any time soon? Stay tuned.

But today, you just feel tired from a particularly long, difficult morning of class and your half shift that you worked until five PM. You hadn’t felt like cooking dinner (you had taken leftovers to work for lunch) and by the time you finished your homework for your natural language processing class, it was past 9 PM and your stomach was rumbling loudly.

You’ve been craving noodles, dumplings and chicken. So you place an order at the nearby restaurant by your apartment and order some extra for Hana for later or for tomorrow.

It’s only a fifteen minute walk from your apartment to the shop, and you plug your headphones in to begin your walk.

You sway on the heels of your feet as you wait for your food, saying hello to the couple who owns the small restaurant. They know you by face, from how many times you’ve been here. Your favorite comfort food (besides homemade food made by your parents) exists here. Your favorite aromas exist here and even just the smell of noodles and chicken has your tummy rumbling.

“I thought you would’ve been out,” A voice comes from your right side, “It’s the week before classes start.”

You turn your head at the voice, heart startling a bit. What in the world is Jungkook doing at your secret but not so secret restaurant?

“I could say the same for you,” You remark with a raise of your eyebrow, “I heard Jimin and Tae went out.”

You vaguely wonder if he’s still hooking up with Nari but decide it’s not your business to ask.

“Ah, well… I have work tomorrow,” Jungkook shrugs.

“Me too, they want me in at 7:30 tomorrow,” You complain, “What do I look like? A cog in the wheel that is capitalism?”

“Don’t we all?” Jungkook snorts.

“I didn’t realize you were working this summer, too. Thought you were just doing whatever soccer captains do,” You mutter, picking up your order off of the countertop.

“And what do soccer captains do, Cherries?”

“I dunno. Score touchdowns or whatever,” You shrug and laugh at the pained expression on Jungkook’s face, “And stop calling me that, Jungkook.”

“Whatever, Cherries. I’ve been working at this architecture firm as an intern. Figured it would help with post grad.”

“Oh wow, I didn’t know that was your major…”

“You definitely did, I’m pretty sure I’ve told you.”

“When-” You shake your head, not wanting to argue with him, “That’s cool. I’m working at a law firm, it’s about a fifteen minute bus ride from my apartment.”

“You wanna study law? Makes sense, because you always wanna argue with me-”

“No, I don’t really know if I want to go to grad school,” You trail off, “Hey! I don’t always argue with you!”

“You’re arguing now,” He says smugly, crossing his hands across his broad chest that you definitely do not ogle at.

“Whatever, Jungkook,” You roll your eyes, “You here for classes or anything?”

“Nah, not this summer. Just work and soccer,” Jungkook replies, “Gives me lots of time for other things.” The man has the audacity to wink at you and give you a big, bunny grin. You pretend like your stomach doesn’t flutter.

You roll your eyes, again. 

“How about you, Cherries? Any classes?”

“Yeah, I’m taking this natural language processing class three times a week for three hours each day-”

“Wait, you’re a comp sci major?” He asks incredulously, “Why are you working at a law firm then?”

“I’m working half as IT support and half as the intern,” You reply with a shrug, “It pays well and it’s pretty easy. Half of the IT support comes in the form of telling the lawyers to restart their computers for software updates. It’s so funny, you should see their amazed faces when all it takes is a fuckin’ restart. Makes a girl feel smart as hell.”

“Smart and pretty, huh?” Jungkook says with a crooked grin, “Where you been all my life, Cherries?”

“Shut up,” You say flatly, levelling him with a glare that only makes him smirk even wider at you.

“Cute,” He breathes with so much conviction that it almost makes you flustered. You clutch your bag of food a little tighter to ground yourself. 

“Me telling you to shut up is cute?” You raise both your eyebrows, eager to shield him from the heat in your cheeks.

“Among many other things, Cherries.”

“Share with the class then…”

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”

“Shut up, and why do you like calling me cherries so much,” You complain, lips jutted out in a pout, “I only wore that top once and now look. You’re referring to me as a delectable, juicy fruit. I mean I don’t blame you-”

“Cherries are my favorite,” Jungkook says, dark eyes swirling with stars. He unnerves you with his raw honesty and sincerity and he lets the implication of his words hang in between you both, your eyes wide by his statement. 

“Well, your taste is questionable because mangoes are very obviously superior-”

You both share a laugh and you’re pleasantly surprised by how the silence that comfortably falls isn’t awkward when you deflect. His name is called shortly after, breaking his intense stare. 

You let out a huff, pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose.

“Hey, I’ll drive you home,” Jungkook says, pushing the door open for you to exit the shop.

“You have a car on campus?” You say, unable to hold back the awe in your voice, “That’s awesome. And uh, no, I mean, you really don’t have to, it’s only a fifteen minute walk-”

“It’s a two minute ride,” Jungkook says, “But I mean, if you’re not comfortable, I get it-”

“No, it’s not that,” You say honestly, “I just don’t want to inconvenience you-”

“You’re not, it’s a two minute ride. Now get in,” Jungkook says reassuringly, opening the passenger side door for you. He puts his own bags of food in the backseat before getting into the driver’s side.

You’ve never really been alone with Jungkook, but for some reason it doesn’t feel that strange. It’s easy to keep conversation (really, it’s banter) flowing with him- as if you’ve been friends for the entirety of the last few years of college. As if you hadn’t spent nearly every waking moment thinking of him a certain way.

He’s easy to talk to. It unnerves you, but you roll with it.

“You should come to a practice one of these days,” Jungkook murmurs. You raise an eyebrow. Why would he ask you to come to one of his soccer practices when you had only just started an acquaintance-ship? Isn’t that crossing some sort of friendship line that you both hadn’t approached yet.

It’s months later when you realize that everything Jungkook does and says is because of his kind, golden heart. He’s such a genuine person, sincerity always dripping from his warm, brown eyes. Everything he does, he does with love.

“Thanks for driving me home, Jungkook,” You murmur with a small smile. It makes his heart sputter in his chest and he easily returns it. “Text me when you get home?”

“If you wanted my number, all you had to do was ask. Cherries,” Jungkook says smugly and you gasp, affronted. “Text me when you get inside your place.”

“That’s not- I didn’t-” You stammer, sighing, “I already have your number, stupid.”

“You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

“I’m not flustered,” You mutter, cheeks blazing as you hurry to get out of his car. Which coincidentally smells just like him. “Goodnight, Jungkook.”

“‘Night, Cherry.”

You roll your eyes but give him a small wave and a smile before entering your building. 

cherries: I’m inside. Drive safe jungkook: you worried about me? cherries: no im worried about your nice car jungkook: uh huh… gonna leave now, text you when i get home? cherries: 👍🏾

It’s about three minutes later (you barely even have time to wash your hands and change into pajamas) before your phone lights up again.

jungkook: im home cherries: me too jungkook: wow you’re funny cherries: pretty and smart too, according to you jungkook: well i wasnt lying 😍 cherries: Uh huhhhhh

You put your phone to the side to put some of the food on your plate, your stomach still rumbling. You turn on the anime you’re currently watching and get cozy on the couch with a glass of wine.

And in the middle of your late dinner, your wine and your show, your phone lights up with texts from Jungkook. It surprises you that he holds the conversation even when you had given him such a dull response. Isn’t he tired of texting you by now?

He keeps you company through your dinner and you barely are even paying attention to the anime you’re watching, only giggling to yourself over Jungkook’s silly texts-

cherries: you’re so distracting, couldnt even finish this episode of fruits basket jungkook: cute cherries: i cant tell u if its cute, i barely watched it bc of you jungkook: no i meant u. Ur cute

Five seconds go by. Then ten. Your face is heated- you’re glad he can’t see you. Maybe you’ll reciprocate someday. But today is not that day.

cherries: shut up

tags: @kookdbean

[shiversdownyerspine]

9. Closer

Just gonna sliiiiide this over here.

You are finishing up the last of the scramble on your plate, fighting off the lingering fuzzy embrace of sleep with the help of your coffee. So the suspense wouldn't kill you, you had asked Axel if their coming questions had to do with your ability. After all, the three hadn't asked all that much about it.

Axel confirms, and you ruminate over the approaching task, how best to handle it...but are distracted when Oscar and Otto return.

The younger brothers look scratched up and dirtied, but overall in good condition. Although it was kind of difficult to tell who looked worse...maybe Otto. Poor man was still in his long johns. 

Grinning, you tease, "You two alright? Both of you look like you dove headfirst into the blackberry brambles."

Axel snorts. You're not far from the truth.

He subtly signals the two with a pointed dip of his head in warning; their feet are filthy and they are about to track a mess into your kitchen. Sheepish, the younger brothers share a look and head back outside, probably to make good use of your garden hose. 

Not wanting to put it off any longer, you ask for a change in scenery for this interrogation once you are dressed. In the garden, specifically. Axel regards you curiously, but agrees to your request.

You wander over to the sink to rinse your dishes when he taunts, "Thinking of running? We will catch you. No contest."

You blink, "No no, no running. I'm just...eager? To get started? Or maybe to get finished..."

Throwing a look over your shoulder, you return the taunt, "But if I did run, and I made it into the forest? I think I could surprise you."

Indeed, you are a good deal faster and more reactive while in your Phase. At least when you're prepared. It certainly helps having nearly all of your senses improved, but playing hide and seek with three trained assassins? It would be difficult to say the least...but in your forest and lake? Your second home? 

You would have an advantage, even being technically untrained. Perhaps you could give them a run for their money...at least for a little while longer than if you had tried in the tight spaces of your cottage.

Speculation and theorizing is cut short when the lone man in your kitchen says quite matter-of-factly, "Otto caught you."

Pride ruffled, you can't help but bristle, "Okay. That? Was a series of unfortunate events. And in my defense? I didn't have anything to run from, nothing was threatening me. It was just a spider bite."

The eldest doesn't reply, just quirks an amused eyebrow at the memory of you, perturbed and fluffed, wrapped up in his puzzled brother's arms. It was...an interesting day, no doubt.

You fiddle with your wet plate, frowning.

"I was distracted with my lack of gloves, that I had let something so simple slip my notice. Dug my own grave in a matter of seconds. Then I heard the door, and there was Otto and...I froze. He lunged and I couldn't move."

Axel contemplates for a moment, "You wanted to run. Not attack."

He says as a statement what should have been a question, never one to be all that subtle with his demands. You feel your stomach drop a little; given the pieces of your revealed history, maybe he was now beginning to reconsider the threat you could have posed to Otto. To all of them.

Acknowledging his concern was easy, but explaining yourself was going to be a bit complicated.  

"I..I think I have an answer for that? But it's something I'd like to address with all of you. I'm going to get dressed first, I've been in pajamas for far too long."

You know he could simply repeat what you said to his siblings, but it was the principle of the thing. That and you really wanted to take a quick moment to yourself before this all goes down. He doesn't stop you.

Toweling your hands dry, you head for the couch to gather up your sleeping kittens and make your way to your bedroom. Axel returns his attention to his brothers who were currently fussing over the hose; Oscar was currently trying to convince Otto to look inside and see what was blocking the water, all the while he held a section kinked in his hand, waiting for the right moment.

The eldest sibling shakes his head.

Butternut and Pumpkin are curled at opposite ends of your bed; one buried in the pillows at the headboard, the other stretched out dramatically at the end. Both chirp a greeting as you open your door and step inside.

Thing 1 and 2 in hand, you deposit the wiggly babies into their 'room'. The two look at you with what you can imagine is disapproval, breaking your heart as they toddle towards the bathroom door with noisy complaint.

"Don't worry, you'll be let out again soon."

Their litter box training had been going swimmingly. Maybe it was about time to expand their territory? You think it'd go rather well, you'd just have to keep an eye out. Make sure they don't try to leave any little surprises for you and develop a nasty habit from it.

You swear their incessant meowing is growing louder. You sigh, shaking your head.

"The book was spot on when it called this breed talkative."

Taking advantage of the lingering warmth of your sleep with Otto, you decide upon a floral tunic dress with leggings instead of your usual chunky sweater and jeans. It's rare that you can wear a lighter ensemble like this, you'll have to find some way to thank Otto.

He does seem to really enjoy your baking, so maybe something in that vein.

As you dress you find your thoughts sombering as the previous conversation slowly ties you into a knot. You try to reassure yourself and soothe your nerves; you wouldn't have lashed out for no reason, wouldn't have killed them in cold blood. You have control. Besides, you're not a violent person. Surely they know that?

That fateful morning, if Otto had reacted with violence towards you, you would have defended yourself to the best of your ability and removed yourself from the situation once the opportunity presented itself. There had to have been a way around him, around his brothers, right? 

If Axel had decided you were too much of an unknown threat and had shot, you would have feigned death until you could slip outside and decide on the next step. You're fairly confident you could play dead and pretend well enough, despite the pain. The blue-clad man wouldn't have just emptied his entire clip into you, right? 

If you were being realistic, you were only considering the best case scenarios for you and the brothers if things had played out a bit...differently. Because if you thought too long about the worst outcome, your heart would squeeze unbearably tight in your chest and your eyes would water uncontrollably. 

You didn't want to think about what you would have done if the three had subjected you to too much injury and triggered your second Phase.

There was no denying it, you were incredibly fond of the three.

Maybe even a bit...smitten? 

At the errant thought you slap your burning cheeks with your palms, fighting against the helpless fluttering sensation of the heated butterflies in your stomach. Not the time. 

...Wait, does that mean there will be a time?

Focus.

Focus, focus, focus.

With a steadying breath, you head back out into the kitchen. There's something you need to grab first.

"One last thing..."

Axel watches curiously as you pop open a kitchen drawer and rummage around its contents for an item you have stashed away.

"Here we go."

You find what you are looking for wrapped in a familiar kitchen towel; an old paring knife, kept clean and disinfected. You unwrap it a bit, just to check on the condition of the blade as the light glints off the metal.

A minor laceration from this would be just what you needed to keep you in your Phase long enough to hopefully answer all their questions.

You weren't sure you could count primarily on verbally explaining all the aspects of your ability. Some things you had nothing to compare with, not to mention how tongue-tied you were before. You're not all that confident when talking about your ability, as discussing it is still incredibly new to you. Demonstration could be a good approach, all things considered.

As you turn from the counter, a rough hand grips your wrist and pulls your arm up, leaving you to sway unsteadily nearly on tip toe. In your personal space, you can feel the warmth of him without needing to touch. It feels like if you could steal a speck of body heat from one of these men, you'd never feel the cold again.

Axel stares you down, lips pulled into a tight scowl, frowning with familiar furrowed brow.

Oh. 

Probably not a good idea to bring out a knife without context, especially around an assassin. Maybe next time explain first.

"...Sooo...um. I can't...will my ability to activate. I-it's a defense mechanism, remember? It needs something to trigger it."

His face is worryingly expressionless as he looks to the knife in your hand. With deft fingers, he plucks the tool from your grasp, leaving you with the empty towel as he slips it into his pocket without a word.

Did he seriously just...

"...Really?"

The audacity.

Radiating cool smugness, Axel strolls to the screen door and looks pointedly at you. Waiting.

You don't budge.

Turning your attention to your knife block set, you hum, "You know I could just grab one of these, right?"

You assess the assortment, paying less attention to the man now stalking back to you.

"Although I'd much rather these be used for cooking, but what choice do I have? Apparently you have your heart set on being a mother hen-"

Your tirade is cut short as Axel's hands grip your waist to turn you to face him. He bends, curls an arm around your legs, and hoists you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Dumbfounded and indignant, your lips part for some sort of reprimand to leave your tongue. But you stumble over the words.

With an arm across the backs of your thighs to lock your legs in place and keep you steady, he walks completely unburdened once more to the screen door. You brace your hands on his back, feeling muscle shift underneath the material of his white Henley with each step. Well, needless to say, you can't really think of a retort at the moment. Hopefully your dress isn't riding up too much.

You can't help but wonder; is it just your imagination, or are the brothers getting a bit more...grabby with you? But more importantly, you cannot let this man have the last 'word'.

Fighting down the butterflies that have returned with a vengeance, you grumble, "Don't complain if I can't give you all some clear answers without my knife."

The large palm loosely holding your thigh gives a squeeze, followed by Axel throwing a comment over his shoulder to you, "We'll see."

Well now. Axel is honest to god mother-henning you. This was...unexpected? Infuriating? Kind of sweet?

...Oh yes. They're most definitely getting more grabby with you.

[kunstpause-archive]

FFXIV Write Prompt #20 - Hypocrisy

“Must you pester me all day?” Emet-Selch’s voice sounded disdainful as he didn’t even deign to open his eyes. 

Cassia’s voice was dry as she rolled her eyes at him. “Evidentially so,” she said. It caused him to frown before he opened his eyes after all.

“Oh, it is you, It thought i was the other, noisy one.” 

Cassia’s eyebrows went up as she gave him a sceptical look, not knowing whom he was referring to. “The noisy one?”

With an aside wave of his hand he shook his head. “No matter.” He seemed just a little bit less annoyed than before, but still not really in a mood to talk. “What do you want then?”

Briefly, she considered simply leaving him to his own devices but she had already talked herself up and into this and it seemed like this was as good a situation as any. “I wanted to thank you again for saving Y’shtola,” she started. “It occurred to me that everyone was rather dismissive about it, a bit rude even in the way they showed their gratefulness.”

Emet-Selch let out a soft snort. “A bit rude? That is an oh so polite description,” he said. “But I did not expect much more if I am honest. I could see plainly how skeptical everyone was. I have eyes, after all.” He sighed with a tired shake of his head. “Was this all you wanted?”

“I also have an answer for you,” Cassia hurried to add.

“An answer?” he asked curiously. “Not a question for once?”

Cassia shrugged. “Well, you were asking earlier. When you were leaving the cave with the murals. And my answer is yes.”

Emet-Selch looked almost confused for a moment and Cassia sighed.

“Yes, I would wish for the same.”

When it seemed to dawn on him what she was talking about his eyes narrowed. “I doubt you could even grasp the situation enough to make a comparison,” he said, his voice a bit harder than before.

Cassia clenched her hand into the skirts of her dress for a moment as she tried to reign back her own temper at his usual, infuriating, dismissal.

“Why do you always do this?” Cassia asked, a sliver of exhaustion shining through her voice. “You tell us we don’t have all the information, and when we ask you ridicule us. And you tell us about the past, but gods beware should we try to sympathise - then we couldn't possibly understand all of a sudden.” The frustration welling up in her made every word sound a bit sharper than usual. “So what is it that you actually want? I’d suspect you are doing all this for some sick sense of gleeful entertainment - but that couldn’t possibly be true with how much complaining you do about how boring we all are.” Her hands were on her hips now, everything about her stance issuing a clear challenge. 

It took Emet-Selch a moment of openly confused staring before he caught himself and his usual, slightly dismissive looking expression was back. “Well, look at that. Who knew you had more in you than the polite questions after all?”

“You could have, if you’d have bothered to answer any of them,” Cassia shot back before she shook her head. “But you’re doing it again, just brushing it all off. I don’t know why I bothered…” She turned around to leave when she heard him chuckle slightly and suddenly she wasn’t simply annoyed - she was furious.

“How dare you,” she hissed, as she turned back to him abruptly. To his credit, his smile disappeared instantly, but Cassia was sick and tired of the whole charade. “How dare you laugh at an honest attempt to show you sympathy, and in the same breath declare us the lesser beings?” In her anger, she took a step closer to him. “You think we couldn’t understand? I lost my entire world too. Nine years ago, when the calamity - that your people were responsible for - wiped it from existence, killing almost everyone I loved, everything I knew.” 

Cassia felt herself shaking with anger. Anger at the old pain resurfacing, anger at his blatant dismissal and anger at herself, for feeling so hurt by it. “Adriene and Lay and me, the three of us are all that is left. Are the only people in existence that still remember what it was like. We have lost everything, except each other. And you dare to stand here, all high and mighty and ancient, and tell us we couldn’t possibly understand your pain…” She forced herself to stop and take a deep breath. When she spoke again, her voice was softer, but no less intense. “You are a hypocrite. And if you were really that intent in making us understand, then you wouldn’t throw my every attempt to do so back at my face.”

There was something in Emet-Selch’s eyes that Cassia couldn't place as he, too, took a step closer. The lines on his face were hard and somehow it almost felt like he was suddenly even taller, more imposing than before. But she stood her ground, her eyes burning with determination. 

“This might be the first time I’ve seen the real you and not just the polite and accommodating role you’re so fond of playing,” he said with a hint of interest in his voice. Cassia was about to snap at him again but before she could draw a deep breath he inclined his head. “I apologize,” he said simply, as if they were discussing an everyday matter. As if she hadn’t just exploded at him. “You are not wrong. What I said was certainly beneath me.”

It wasn’t what she would consider a heartfelt apology, but it also was way more than she would ever have expected and Cassia felt the storm inside her simmer down again. 

“Good,” she said simply. “Then maybe next time we can have an actual conversation.”

The corner of his mouth twitched briefly, and Cassia could see he was trying to keep a neutral look, probably to prevent himself from saying some other demeaning quip about her questions and she narrowed her eyes again.

“Come on, tell me how insignificant we are again, you look like you’re dying to…” she said sharply and the sudden, sheepish look on his face made her sigh in exasperation. “You just can’t help yourself, can you? Like a creature of bad habit…”

“You try and unlearn a few lifetimes of habits over the course of one conversation,” Emet-Selch said, his raised eyebrows matching the hint of mockery in his tone. Yet Cassia had the distinct impression, that there was something almost defensive hidden underneath it.

“I wouldn’t have to,” she shot back. “I haven't ever been this much of an ass in my one lifetime yet.”

As she saw his eyes flash with amusement, Cassia felt a dry chuckle rise up her throat. Briefly she wondered how she could have gone from genuine anger to what all of a sudden felt like almost playful insults in such a short time. There was something about the Ascian, as infuriating as he was most of the time, that seemed to endlessly fascinate her. And as she watched the subtle change on his face, wondering what it all meant, she noticed that she definitely wasn’t alone in feeling like this about their interactions. There was something in the way he looked at her, how he subtly seemed to size her up, that felt strangely familiar.

As if he had caught himself staring, Emet-Selch suddenly cleared his throat. “Now, if you would be so kind and let me return to my nap,” he said, with another nod at the tree he had been lounging in comfortably before she had interrupted him. “As enlightening as this talk was, I am afraid there is nothing so remarkable about you or your kind as to keep me from it.”

His voice sounded as dismissive as usual again but his eyes still lingered, and they said something decidedly different. Suddenly something clicked in Cassia’s mind as she saw his look or what it was. A wave of surprise and amusement went through her, followed by an unsettling curiosity and the knowledge, that she was about to do something reckless again.

“Liar,” she said with a knowing smile on her face and her tone made him pause. 

“Beg your pardon?”

“You can keep saying how unremarkable you find me, but if I know one look on every man's face, it's the look of someone who is picturing me naked,” Cassia said, her lips curling up into a sweet smile. “You find me interesting enough for that. Not that I blame you,” she added, before throwing his earlier words back at him, “You have eyes, after all.”

Cassia suspected that the absolute stillness he displayed was what he did where other people - the ones with far less life-experience - would have started to splutter. 

“My dear,” Emet-Selch finally said as he found his voice again, “You are certainly the most entertaining of your bunch.” He sounded almost perfectly normal, if it weren’t for a slight hint of raspiness that definitely hadn’t been there before. When Cassia only looked at him with raised brows he shook his head in disbelief. “Are you actually propositioning me?” he asked, not quite unable to banish the curiosity from his voice.

Cassia chuckled again, this time in genuine amusement. “I would never dare to,” she said with an overly earnest tone. “Could you even imagine? A Warrior of Light and an Ascian?” She shook her head before - for once - making the wise choice and turning to walk away again, ere the situation got more out of hand than it already was. “I’ll leave you to your beauty sleep, but I’m looking forward to our next conversation.”

As she walked away she thought she could hear him say quietly, “So do I.”

[justanotherlifeff]

Levi Ackerman × reader

Genre: Angst, Hurt/comfort, Fluff, matured themes, slowburn

Warning: There's mentions and descriptions of underage rape and suicidal themes and self harm.

Levi POV

The other members of the squad gathered to see me spar with the new girl. I've only taken her into my squad because Shadis bragged about how good she was on the combat stimulated graduation test. "If trained by you, she'll be a very efficient titan slayer. However, she seems to work best alone, and when you give her some respect. She strangled a cadet to unconsciousness once for catcalling her. That's the only time she got in trouble with the rules." Shadis explained. I, however, wasn't going to give 'respect' to some privileged cadet who's much younger than I am. He mentioned she's as good as I am but I doubt it because she looks like she can barely lift a rock. Her big mouth back at the courtroom didn't improve my views on her either. A weak brat with a big mouth is as shitty as horse shit in a stable. She did have something different about her though. Her eyes, they held the same expression as mine. "Am I judging her wrong?" I wondered internally before putting the thought aside because what possibly can happen to a privileged brat who lived all her life up here? Dead parents? That happened to pretty much everyone in the undergrounds. As we reached the middle of the courtyard, I saw her take a defensive stance. "Hmm, that is a pretty good strategy" I thought. This means she wants to access my attacking style before attacking me. But it isn't too easy to predict me. With that, I threw a kick at her.

Your POV

He figured out my plan about the defensive strategy. I could see it in his eyes. His face was expressionless but his eyes gave it away. I understood because I never bring what I feel onto my face either. He came close to land a punch on me but I knew it could be a kick as well since he already figured out my plan. I was right and he did through a kick. I caught his leg and tried to twist it so that he would fall down but surprisingly, he just used his other leg to kick at my face. I held it at the last moment but that made him wrap his leg on my neck and throwing me to the ground. He wasn't using any particular fighting technique. He went from offensive to defensive and the other way around in a matter of moments. He made up his moves along the way.

Now that I knew his tactics, I took advantage of my aerobics skills and grabbed his neck from behind with my legs as he was over me holding my hands securely and putting a leg on my back so that I couldn't move while I was on the ground with my nose on the floor. As I choked him, he released my hand to remove my feet from his neck. I took the advantage of it and used my hand to remove his leg from my back and slid away from underneath him. However he caught my leg and as I fell down, he pinned my hands with his legs and my legs with his hands. There was only one thing to do now but that made me feel uncomfortable beyond measures. He wouldn't expect this attack in any way because most people in the army were strong but not flexible enough to do this. I had to thank my childhood in the underground for this as the amount of stretching I went through all my childhood made me flexible enough to ace all the aerobic lessons my aerobics instructor threw at me back when I trained with Uncle Erwin.

"You privileged brats don't know the importance of survival. All you can do is bark like a street dog, trying to make your whims justified. No wonder you can't win. If you have never seen death right infront of your eyes, you can't take a fight seriously. This is what brats like you should get for trying to act like grownups and interfering when your superiors are talking" he said with his monotone voice. A flash of memory went through my head. The picture of a darkened room, the blood splattered on the floor, the many hands approaching me. I knew I had to do something.

Levi POV

I had her now. She did put up a good fight but she definitely didn't last too long. Just when I was thinking this, I saw her boots sliding off and her legs shooting out and then she sat on my face. Leaving out the part about how embarrassing it was, that clearly was something I didn't see coming. She pinned my arms and legs with immense speed using her hands and legs because she couldn't hold it alone with her hands. "I surrender" I grunted because my face was being squished. She got up and saluted me. Everyone was staring dumbstruck. I personally was caught aback with that move. She was looking down on the ground trying to hide her face because she probably was blushing. I had to admit she was good. Being able to bend so much without breaking her back was an immense feat. She was second in command material. I finally understood what Shadis was implying. She doesn't deal with criticism well. Her fighting techniques were impressive enough to gain my respect though, even if she was a subordinate. I decided that I would respect her as an equal since that probably would lead her to trust me and help me to train her to make use of her skills in the most efficient way possible. Maybe I judged her wrong because someone with a privileged life wouldn't be able to react like that to a simple sentence... Her name seemed familiar too...

"I suppose Shadis wasn't lying. You are really talented. I couldn't have predicted that move but please do try not to sit on people's faces because it's awkward." I said keeping my normal monotone voice. "Sorry sir. This won't happen again" She answered, embarrassment clear in her eyes. "You have the quality to be second in command. However, I'll see how good you are on our next expedition and then think about it. You're dismissed. Get me a cup of tea at my office in one hour, Petra" I stated before going back in the castle to take a shower. The fight made me filthy.

Your POV

As embarassing as it was, I won against the strongest soldier of humanity. I was only able to win because he wasn't too tall and I surprised him by sitting on his face. He probably didn't expect a girl to do something like that. Not to mention that my flexibility gave me certain advantages in combat. I wouldn't have won against him otherwise because he's very much stronger than I am. Everyone was staring at me and once Levi left, Petra, Eren and three other men came towards me awestruck. "YOU ACTUALLY DEFEATED LEVI HEICHOU!" Petra screamed. "I thought he was gonna kill you" said Eren with a bright expression. "Well, you did pretty good for a rookie though. I'm Oluo Bozado. Call me Oluo" said one of the three men. "I see you will take my post as second in command in no time" Eld Jinn sighed. I knew him from the newspapers. With that, Eren went back to his chores already since it was clear that he was scared of Levi heichou to death. "She clearly deserves to be second in command given that you never won against heichou" said the other man. "Well, Gunther, atleast I didn't piss my pants like Petra and Oluo here when I first saw titans" said Eld. "It wasn't anything notable. I have much to learn." I answered to them. "Oh come on! Don't be so sour! Lighten up a bit!" Petra laughed, invading my personal space by hugging me out of nowhere. Did she really not get the message that I don't like people around me? "Well, I'll take a shower" I muttered before leaving. I made my contribution to the conversation and went to the bathroom.

After washing my body, I took a blade in my hand as usual and started making clean strokes on my back. Tears streamed from my eyes as my back was bleeding from the not-too-deep wounds but I didn't make any noise. This was the only way I knew to cope with my demons. This reminded of my childhood. Being hurt was what I was born for and I didn’t know how to live without it. The things Levi heichou told me triggered every emotions all at once. I wanted to kill him for denying the fact that I faced all those things that no one should face. I wanted to get rid of the whole squad for being so damn noisy and getting in my personal space. I needed the pain to calm down. "It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts..." my mind kept muttering like it did every day back in the underground. "I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive I'm alive..." my mind consoled me with every stroke of the blade. This helped me keep my sanity back in the underground. As long as I was alive and I felt the pain, I would be alright.

"Ugh these disgusting food will give me constipation like Levi Heichou. No wonder he looks like someone slapped him all the time" I heard Petra's voice and before I could do anything, the door of the bathroom opened and Petra saw me. She looked petrified to see me naked, crying and bloody and she lunged at me, trying to take the blade from me but I kicked her in the stomach and pushed her out of the bathroom and locked the door. "Damn it, I shouldn't have forgotten to lock" I thought. Petra called at me a while after I asked her to mind her own business and then she left the room. By then I bandaged my back as usual and was cleaning the blood off the washroom when I heard a loud banging of the door and Corporal Levi's voice saying "Open the damn door brat!". I hid the blade and got dressed quickly and opened the door. " Petra told me that you were cutting yourself. Is that true?" he asked firmly. "Yes but it's not her damn business to poke her nose into everything I do" I replied with a cold glare at Petra which made her flinch. "What's your name Cadet?" Levi heichou asked with pure anger in his eyes. "(Y/N) (L/N) Sir." I replied with a calm voice. "And where are you from?" he asked with the same expression. "From Shiganshina District Sir." I replied. Some sort of realization spreaded across his eyes.

He turned to Petra and surprisingly, he only asked her to give me some antiseptic cream before he left. Petra did what he asked but kept giving me a sympathetic look. "Petra, stop with that pitying look that you're giving me. I don't need it" I told her while we were making lunch together. "I'm sorry." she replied but didn't stop with the sympathetic looks. I decided to let it slide. I didn't talk much at lunch except for when Eld asked me about my graduation results. They were mostly busy talking to themselves about how I beat Levi heichou until Levi heichou himself arrived shutting all of their mouths. After lunch, Oluo and Gunther were doing the dishes and I took a new book from my bag and went near the pond behind the castle to read it. The stairs of the bank was clean. Levi heichou probably made Eren clean it. "I see you're into reading too" I heard Levi heichou's voice. I stood up and saluted. He nodded and sat on the stairs too. "You can sit cadet" he said in his monotone voice. I sat at my place glad that he kept a good distance from me.

"Are you the girl who killed that Garrison soldier? " heichou asked without looking at me. "Yes sir." I replied calmly. I should've expected this to come up. "I read that book. It's a good one" he said, again with his usual monotone voice but that sentence made me blush. Levi heichou reads romance books with machoism in it? "You probably would like the book more as it is from a girl's point of view. After all, you do seem to cut yourself" he said. "It's not like that, heichou. I suppose cutting myself reminds me that I'm alive and I can make everything right. I feel like this book portrays it well because as long as you feel pain, you can still hope to feel happiness someday. When you stop feeling pain, you're either dead or too numb to feel anything. I honestly would like to keep feeling because when someone is numbed, all that's left for them is to die." I answered.

"I've heard something similar to that. About having no regrets. I suppose you can only have regrets when you're numb as you wouldn't have anything to live for. So, I guess that makes sense." he replied. "Heichou, please don't mind me asking, but, why are you alive?" my mouth blurted out. "Well, honestly, I don't know. Probably because humanity needs me and I probably am making a difference? I don't know really." he answered vaguely. "So, is it pride that's keeping you alive?" I asked him. "No. It's not. You could say, I'm alive because if I can make a contribution to eradicate the titans, I will feel worthy of having a normal life." he answered. It was strange that he talked to me so freely. Is it because I gained his respect by that fight? "So, you want to make things right for yourself and the feeling of worth is what makes you remember that you are alive and well enough to do that." I stated. "Yes. That's it." he replied. With that he started reading another book. After a while I was ensured that he won't make anymore conversation and so I got immersed into my own book.

A week later

Levi heichou decided to train me personally after my first day at his squad. He told me that I had potential but I wasn't doing things right and just agility won't get me anywhere. Thus, I needed to build my strength. Yesterday, Levi heichou found me cleaning the stables as he ordered me to do so after I spilled a cup of tea on him and apparantly my cleaning was close to flawless which is why, I was excused from every other cleaning duties and was assigned with cleaning his office daily. "I take back everything I said about you getting out of work, (Y/N). You just got handed a death sentence." Eren told me last night at dinner time. "Just don't argue with him when he shouts at you. Answer with 'yes heichou' only." Petra chimed in. "You'll get kicked out of the squad now for sure" Oluo snorted while the others merely gave me pityful looks. "I don't know... It didn't seem too bad when he criticized the way I cleaned the stable... Heichou even helped out to clean the spots I missed." I answered, confused with their statements. "Huh? Levi Heichou shouted at me to clean the stable again during my first time... And he made me do it three times..." Eren answered, quite surprised. "You must be really good at it then..." Petra muttered, sounding quite jealous for some reason. "I suppose I am..." I muttered, eating a spoonful of stew, remembering all the practice I had of cleaning.

I knocked on the door to Levi heichou's office to hear his monotoned voice shout out, "state your name and business.". " It's Cadet (L/N). I'm here for cleaning duties." I told him before he answered me with a "come in". I entered his office with a bucket full of water in one hand, a mop, a broom, a brush and a soap in another, and a dish cloth on my shoulder. Heichou was right, I need to work on building my strength because I felt like my hand was getting torn off by the weight of the huge filled bucket. The buckets in this place were too big to be honest. "You look like you're about to die. Aren't you practicing the exercises that I taught you the other day?" Heichou asked me with an irritated voice as he approached me and snatched the bucket from my hand and placed it infront of a window. I didn't get any time to practice those exercises because...well, I was slacking off due to all the new books in my room. "Sorry, Heichou. I will pay more attention to training from now on." I answered, with a speck of guilt in my voice since I didn't join the military to slack off. Heichou didn't reply to that and went back to his desk to continue his paperworks.

I started with cleaning the window, using the brush and soap to clean the windowsill. It didn't take too long as the place was pretty clean. Then I moved on to the furnitures, using water from the bucket to get the dirt off. I cleaned all the furnitures in silence except the desk, as I thought that disturbing Levi heichou wasn't a good idea. Then I used the brush to start scrubbing the floor. Just like I used to do back in the underground. "People usually start with the mop but I prefer what you're doing." I heard heichou comment. "Thank you." I replied and continued scrubbing. "Where did you learn to clean?" he asked me after a few moments. The question made me pause everything that I was doing momentarily but I collected myself almost immediately and answered, "Back in the underground." "I see. Seems like people from the underground are better at cleaning than the ones up here. Talk about irony." Heichou scoffed. "I believe that they don't have that need to clean because they take the cleanliness for granted." I replied, not taking my concentration off from scrubbing. "You're right." Heichou answered.

After a few more moments, I heard him say, "Back when I was a kid, I had the fortune to spend a whole day in a room with a corpse in it. It started to smell at the end and I decided that I would not tolerate filth ever again because it reminds me of rotting corpses.". Did he just share a childhood experience with me? Why would he do that? Is it because we both have similar backgrounds? These thoughts filled my head for a moment before I remembered that I never talked about my childhood with anyone. I never did it because I didn't expect anyone to understand. I assumed that they would think I'm a freak. Is that how Levi heichou felt too? If that's the case, maybe letting some burden off my chest by talking to him won't hurt. Ofcourse, I wouldn't tell him everything about myself but a random experience won't hurt.

"How much do you know about me?" I asked him. He seemed to be surprised by the question. "You were rescued from a brothel in the underground and you killed a guy from the garrison. Why do you ask?" he asked me. "Well, when I was a kid, I was locked into this room by the pimp. It had this small window on top of the wall that I couldn't reach. Almost no light came out of that window and I used to sit on that speck of light as I was scared of the darkness. So, the pimp came in that room with a lamp every day to clean up the mess and I used to take as much time as possible to clean cause I wanted the light to stay there for as long as possible. I guess, that's what gave me my habbit to clean. Oh, and about that question, I asked it to determine how much I can tell you." I answered, not looking up from the floor. "You used to live at a brothel? I didn't know... I'm sorry about that. I grew up in a brothel too." Heichou told me, his eyes showing that he understood me.

However, he didn't understand. No one here could. "I'm sorry too. Because you had to go through that. Being around a corpse doesn't feel good." I answered quietly. Thus, with that, a friendly relationship with heichou began, as we would talk every day when I came to clean his room, each time finding out that we understood eachother more than anyone else ever could.

To be continued

Taglist: @kingtamakimurder, @realityisoftendisapointing

[accioromione]

Book Analysis.....Relationship development (Ron + Hermione)

We’ll start from book 1 of course 

“Oh, are you doing magic? Let’s see it, then.”

She sat down. Ron looked taken aback. “Er — all right.” He cleared his throat.

“Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, Turn this stupid, fat rat yellow.”

He waved his wand, but nothing happened. Scabbers stayed gray and fast asleep. “Are you sure that’s a real spell?” said the girl. “Well, it’s not very good, is it? I’ve tried a few simple spells just for practice and it’s all worked for me. I’ve learned all our course books by heart, of course.”

So this obviously isn’t a love at first sight type of thing (which it shouldn’t be...they’re only 11). And she’s a little arrogant ....

“All right – I only came in here because people outside are behaving very childishly, racing up and down the corridors,” said Hermione in a sniffly voice. “And you’ve got dirt on your nose, by the way, did you know?” - Chapter 6, U.S. 110

It’s interesting to see how this develops because this introduction serves to introduce a character who comes across as bratty and annoying 

Ron, at the next table, wasn’t having much more luck.

“Wingardium Leviosa!” he shouted, waving his long arms like a windmill. “You’re saying it wrong.” Harry heard Hermione snap. “It’s Wing-gar-dium Levi-o-sa, make the ‘gar’ nice and long.” - Chapter 10, U.S. 171

In a literary perspective I absolutely love how this starts off. Ron and Harry kind of immediately connect..they’re both likeable...But with Hermione it’s like so unexpected that they would even become friends...

“I hope you’re pleased with yourselves. We could have been all killed — or worse, expelled.” 

So yeah we get an idea as Hermione being this annoying character who’s basically getting in the way of Harry and Rons fun ..but then the troll part comes along... 

“If they hadn't found me, I'd be dead now. Harry stuck his wand up its nose and Ron knocked it out with its own club. They didn't have time to come and fetch anyone. It was about to finish me off when they arrived." Harry and Ron tried to look as though this story wasn't news to them. "Well- in that case..." said Professor McGonagall, staring at the three of them, "Miss Granger, you foolish girl, how could you think of tackling a mountain troll on your own?" Hermione hung her head. Harry was speechless. Hermione was the last person to do anything against the rules, and here she was, pretending she had, to get them out of trouble. It was as if Snape had started handing out sweets. "Miss Granger, five points will be taken from Gryffindor for this," said Professor McGonagall. "I'm very disappointed in you. If you're not hurt at all, you'd better get off to Gryffindor tower. Students are finishing the feast in their houses." Hermione left. Professor McGonagall turned to Harry and Ron. "Well, I still say you were lucky, but not many first years could have taken on a full-grown mountain troll. You each win Gryffindor five points. Professor Dumbledore will be informed of this. You may go." They hurried out of the chamber and didn't speak at all until they had climbed two floors up. It was a relief to be away from the smell of the troll, quite apart from anything else. "We should have gotten more than ten points," Ron grumbled. "Five, you mean, once she's taken off Hermione's." "Good of her to get us out of trouble like that," Ron admitted. "Mind you, we did save her." "She might not have needed saving if we hadn't locked the thing in with her," Harry reminded him. They had reached the portrait of the Fat Lady. "Pig snout," they said and entered. The common room was packed and noisy. Everyone was eating the food that had been sent up. Hermione, however, stood alone by the door, waiting for them. There was a very embarrassed pause. Then, none of them looking at each other, they all said "Thanks," and hurried off to get plates. But from that moment on, Hermione Granger became their friend. There are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve-foot mountain troll is one of them.” ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

And then she nags them about the adventures but we see the growth when she goes with them to get the stone ... so yeah they become friends and that’s that...

and of course 

Hermione: "Devil’s Snare, Devil’s Snare … what did Professor Sprout say? — it likes the dark and the damp —"Harry: "So light a fire!"Hermione: "Yes — of course — but there’s no wood!"Ron: "HAVE YOU GONE MAD? ARE YOU A WITCH OR NOT?"

Basically showing how all of them were necessary and played a part in saving the day, also a ditzy Hermione moment with Ron stepping up..I really like it... because it shows that on an intellectual level they can converse and debate well as well as take each-other seriously

Now onto chamber of secrets 

Harry knew at once that Malfoy had said something really bad because there was an instant uproar at his words. Flint had to dive in front of Malfoy to stop Fred and George jumping on him. Alicia shrieked, "How dare you!”, and Ron plunged his hand into his robes, pulling out his wand, yelling, “You’ll pay for that one, Malfoy!” and pointed it furiously under Flint’s arm at Malfoy’s face. A loud bang echoed around the stadium and a jet of green light shot out of the wrong end of Ron’s wand, hitting him in the stomach and sending him reeling backward onto the grass. “Ron! Ron! Are you all right?” squealed Hermione. Ron opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead he gave an almighty belch and several slugs dribbled out of his mouth onto his lap. -Chapter 7, U.S. 112-113

So they’re officially friends and Ron is obviously now protective of Hermione ...This is not out of character for him as we see just how quick Ron is to stand up for people close to him..He is Gryffindor after all 

I - don’t - like - spiders,” said Ron tensely. “I never knew that,” said Hermione, looking at Ron in surprise. “You’ve used spiders in Potions loads of times…” “I don’t mind them dead,” said Ron, who was carefully looking anywhere but at the window. “I just don’t like the way they move…” Hermione giggled. “It’s not funny,” said Ron, fiercely. “If you must know, when I was three, Fred turned my - my teddy bear into a great big filthy spider because I broke his toy broomstick…. You wouldn’t like them either if you’d been holding your bear and suddenly it had too many legs and…” He broke off, shuddering. Hermione was obviously still trying not to laugh. - Chapter 9, U.S. 154

More friendship...the audience now gets see a more relaxed side of Hermione now ...Philosophers stone we saw this very serious- and by the rules Hermione up until she meets Harry and Ron...their influence on her has already peaked its way...and has made her character develop..so now she can take part in light hearted conversations instead of just being someone who uses her wit to help advance in the plot 

And now we have Ron saying stuff like 

“That’s what Hermione does. When in doubt, go to the library.” 

I really like this quote because it shows just how close they’ve become as friends..like yep thats Hermione..I know her well so like this is her typical behaviour 

Now we see something taking a little turn.... 

Harry: "What’ve we got this afternoon?"Hermione: "Defense Against the Dark Arts."Ron: "Why have you outlined all Lockhart’s lessons in little hearts?"―Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley

So after this it's a good thing to note that it really is ALWAYS Ron to point out things with Hermione..never Harry ...and he mentions Lockhart a lot... 

“What’s that?” asked Harry, pointing to something gold sticking out from under Hermione’s pillow. “‘Just a Get Well card,” said Hermione hastily, trying to poke it out of sight, but Ron was too quick for her. He pulled it out, flicked it open and read aloud: ‘To Miss Granger, wishing you a speedy recovery, from your concerned teacher, Professor Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League and five times winner of Witch Weekly’s Most-Charming-Smile Award.’ Ron looked up at Hermione, disgusted. “You sleep with this under your pillow?”

So Ron is clearly paying more attention / cares more than Harry does and whatnot 

"Bet you five Galleons the next Mudblood dies. Pity it wasn't Granger-" The bell rang at that moment, which was lucky; at Malfoy's last words, Ron had leapt off his stool, and in the scramble to collect bags and books, his attempts to reach Malfoy went unnoticed. "Let me at him," Ron growled as Harry and Dean hung onto his arms. "I don't care, I don't need my wand, I'm going to kill him with my bare hands-"

So we see that Ron is VERY defensive over Hermione ....it was not Harry to leap up...or Dean..or anyone else..it was Ron 

Harry scrawled to Ron: Let's do it tonight. Ron read the message, swallowed hard, and looked sideways at the empty seat usually filled by Hermione. The sight seemed to stiffen his resolve, and he nodded. "Tonight, we will be able to revive those people who have been petrified.." There was an explosion of cheering... Ron was looking happier than he'd looked in days. "Wonder if she did see the attacker, though?" said Ron, looking sadly at Hermione's rigid face. "You will find that Madam Pomfrey is still awake. She's just giving out Mandrake juice - I daresay the basilisk's victims will be waking up at any moment." "So Hermione's okay!" said Ron brightly.

So all of these clearly show that Ron clearly has a soft spot for Hermione...you can argue that this is not romantic (some speculate it is) but no one can argue that he clearly deeply cares about Hermione

Now we have POA...(ENTERING TEENS UH-OH)

Mum and dad gave me some money to get myself an early birthday present." "How about a nice book?" said Ron innocently.

Playful banter...I think the teasing is cute and its moments like these that are crucial in their developing crushes .. I think Ron used to find Hermione’s know-it-allness annoying but then after meeting her and seeing that she’s basically a dork....finds it endearing...basically growing up with Percy he thought well Hermione is a freaking Percy know it all...but then after spending time with her he realized she really is just a loser who genuinely enjoys reading and isn’t doing it for status or to look down at other people....a

[incident with Malfoy insulting Hagrid followed by Hermione slapping him] "Hermione!" said Ron again, sounding both stunned and impressed. "We're due in charms," said Ron, still goggling at Hermione

I think this was a huge moment that made Ron start to like Hermione...he see  her brave, bad ass and passionate side...Someone like Ron...who is Gryffindor through and through really likes that side of her ....and it further shows the character development we see from Hermione

"Hermione, I don't know what's gotten into you lately!" said Ron, astounded. "First you hit Malfoy, then you walk out on Professor Trelawny-" Hermione looked rather flattered. So yeah here we have the developing crush... 

Seconds later, Hermione slithered down beside him. "Where's Ron?" she whispered in a terrified voice.

So it’s obvious that they care a lot about eachother.. originally we saw Ron care about Hermione (because she was the victim in COS, but now we see it’s not one sided) 

“Hermione,” said Ron, frowning as he looked over her shoulder, “they’ve messed up your schedule. Look - they’ve got you down for about ten subjects a day. There isn’t enough time.” “I’ll manage. I’ve fixed it all with Professor McGonagall.” “But look,” said Ron, laughing, “see this morning? Nine o'clock, Divination. And underneath, nine o'clock, Muggle Studies. And” - Ron leaned closer to her schedule, disbelieving - “look - underneath that, Arithmancy, nine o'clock. I mean, I know you’re good, Hermione, but no one’s that good. How’re you supposed to be in three classes at once?” “Don’t be silly,” said Hermione shortly. “Of course I won’t be in three classes at once.” “Well, then -” “Pass the marmalade,” said Hermione. “But -” “Oh, Ron, what’s it to you if my schedule’s a bit full?” Hermione snapped. “I told you, I’ve fixed it all with Professor McGonagall.”-Chapter 6, U.S. 98

This is nothing new, so as you see 

Ron’s always the one to notice Hermione’s things..be that Lockhart..her schedule...her writing to Viktor..her being in a mood...her going missing..he’s always the one who’s giving the dialogue about Hermione....so it shows they have a special kind of connection... 

"Honestly, am I the only person who's ever bothered to read Hogwarts, a History?" said Hermione crossly to Harry and Ron. "Probably," said Ron. "Why?"

Moments like these continuing to playful banter between them

"If Snape's teaching Defense against the Dark Arts again I'm skiving off," said Ron as they headed towards Lupin's classroom after lunch. "Check who's in there, Hermione." Hermione peered around the classroom door. "It's okay!" Professor Lupin was back at work.

Love this because it shows how Hermione was like going to skip with Ron lol...I think it’s because he got detention last time for defending him or else she would not have let it slide 

A shower of brilliantly colored sweets fell into Harry’s lap. It was dusk, and Ron and Hermione had just turned up in the common room, pink-faced from the cold wind and looking as though they’d had the time of their lives. -Chapter 8, U.S. 157

So now we witness that Harry is not a key in them being able to be together..and Ron and Hermione alone are able to have a good time as they are genuine friends 

and then of course we have when scammers goes missing..

"Well, look at it logically," said Hermione, turning to the rest of the group. "I mean, Binky didn't even die today, did he? Lavender just got the news today -" Lavender wailed loudly. "- and she can't have been dreading it, because it's come as a real shock -" "Don't mind Hermione, Lavender," said Ron loudly, "she doesn't think other people's pets matter very much."- Chapter 8, U.S. 149

this is important...Hermione ..although has had character growth..is still Hermione Granger..a very logical..by the book person...if you go on further in the books you notice that Hermione..although kind..and caring..and meaning well...tends to not offer much emotional support to people when she thinks of logical answers...not just to Ron but see in this case Lavender..she does it to Hagrid..and to Harry .. I think this is one of her character flaws because well imagine you’re upset about something and really just want someone to be like ‘hey yeah you’re right this sucks’ instead you get ‘well....’ and and logical explanation ..she admits this back in book 1- books and cleverness.....Ron is actually a lot better than her in this sense.

Anyway..." She glanced over at Ron too. "He doesn't want me to join in." There was no arguing with this, as Ron chose that moment to say loudly, "If Scabbers hadn't been eaten, he could have had some of those Fudge Flies. He used to really like them -" Hermione burst into tears. Before Harry could say or doing anything, she tucked the enormous book under her arm, and, still sobbing, ran toward the staircase to the girls' dormitories and out of sight. "Can't you give her a break?" Harry asked Ron quietly. "No," said Ron flatly. ""If she just acted like she was sorry - but she'll never admit she's wrong, Hermione. She's still acting like Scabbers has gone on vacation or something."-Chapter 13, U.S. 264

I feel like Ron never got enough credit for being as patient and chill as he was. We know Ron can be hot tempered when it comes to defending his friends..but when it actually comes to his friends he is very forgiving and easy going. I just want to point out that in this same book, Harry refused to talk to Hermione the second he found out she got his broom confiscated. Ron on the other hand, was still talking to Hermione even when he thought scabbers was eaten only until she refused to apologize..at that moment I think Ron was frustrated with her lack of empathy..and in a way I think it was to teach her a lesson....here we even see him admitting to Harry that he just wanted her to admit she was wrong or just act sorry... Hermione...instead of thinking of a possibility that she might be wrong just begins to cry...so I also think moments like these are important because it contributes to Hermione’s character growth and shows how Ron.. as her friend..

Malfoy's dad frightened the Committee into it," said Hermione, wiping her eyes. "You know what he's like. They're a bunch of doddery old fools, and they were scared. There'll be an appeal, though, there always is. Only I can't see any hope... Nothing will have changed."

"Yeah, it will," said Ron fiercely. "You won't have to do all the work alone this time, Hermione. I'll help." "Oh, Ron!" Hermione flung her arms around Ron's neck and broke down completely. Ron, looking quite terrified, patted her very awkwardly on the top of the head. Finally, Hermione drew away. "Ron, I'm really, really sorry about Scabbers...," she sobbed. "Oh - well - he was old," said Ron, looking thoroughly relieved that she had let go of him. "And he was a bit useless. You never know, Mum and Dad might get me an owl now." -Chapter 15, U.S. 292

So now we have Ron..who has put his own feelings aside to help for the greater good. A lot of people tend to talk about Ron being ‘immature’ I actually argue that no one in the trio is immature. A character I would consider immature would be a character like Peeves ..when it comes to Harry Potter characters a lot of them are mature ...and the most mature in my opinion are the trio...we always see them knowing when to be serious/ or put other matter asides when they are put in situations ..I actually feel sorry for them in the sense that I don’t think they ever truly got to be kids..But anyways this greatly shows how mature Ron is capable of being...He realizes that Hagrid is much more important than his fight with Hermione..and when Hermione finally apologizes he’s not only quick to forgive...but he tries to console her in a way that says ‘oh its not a big deal’ when we know he did truly care for the Rat. At a maturity level I actually say that Ron and Hermione are equally as mature...

ok so lets move on... 

"Granger, they're after Muggles," said Malfoy, grinning maliciously. "If you think they can't spot a Mudblood, stay where you are." "You watch your mouth!" shouted Ron. Everybody present knew that "Mudblood" was a very offensive term for a witch or wizard of Muggle parentage. "Never mind, Ron," said Hermione quickly, seizing Ron's arm to restrain him as he took a step toward Malfoy.- Chapter 9, U.S. 122

So more proof that Ron’s care for Hermione is only growing with time 

“… Dad could’ve got a promotion any time… he just likes it where he is…” “Of course he does,” said Hermone quietly. “Don’t let Malfoy get to you, Ron-” -Chapter 11, U.S. 169

So we see some character development here..and Ron is a huge factor for this...seeing back in POA after the whole ordeal...Hermione did not have much of a sensitive side..but here we see a more emotionally mature Hermione 

"You're eating again, I notice," said Ron, watching Hermione adding liberal amounts of jam to her toast too. "I've decided there are better ways of making a stand about elf rights," said Hermione haughtily. "Yeah... and you were hungry," said Ron, grinning.- Chapter 13, U.S. 194

It is endearing that Ron was concerned about her not eating...and again he is always the one to pay attention to what Hermione is doing.this is playful and he’s grinning because we have an instant where Hermione is not going along with what she originally planned...admitting she was wrong in her attempts...and also because he’s relieved to see her eating...also character growth...Hermione admits (although hautingly) that her original attempt was wrong...and this is GOOD for her....I think it’s also a moment like this that Ron likes to see ...and contributes to his growing like for Hermione 

"That idiot, Hogwarts champion?" said Ron as they pushed their way through the chattering crowd toward the staircase. "He's not an idiot. You just don't like him because he beat Gryffindor at Quidditch," said Hermione. "I've heard he's a really good student - and he's a prefect." She spoke as though this settled the matter. "You only like him because he's handsome," said Ron scathingly. "Excuse me, I don't like people just because they're handsome!" said Hermione indignantly Ron gave a loud false cough, which sounded oddly like "Lockhart!" -Chapter 15, U.S. 236

So we start to see Ron become a bit jealous...I also think Ron is so surprised that Hermione can be stereotypically girly because it’s just not the Hermione he is used to seeing...but this makes him realize that well..she is in fact a girl.... and that he ..who already cares about her..and finds her endearing...realizes that she is not just another Harry to him 

Jets of light shot from both wands, hit each other in midair, and ricocheted off at angles - Harry's hit Goyle in the face, and Malfoy's hit Hermione. Goyle bellowed and put his hands to his nose, where great ugly boils were springing up - Hermione, whimpering in panic, was clutching her mouth.

"Hermione!" Ron had hurried forward to see what was wrong with her; Harry turned and saw Ron dragging Hermione's hand away from her face. It wasn't a pretty sight. Hermione's front teeth - already larger than average - were now growing at an alarming rate; she was looking more and more like a beaver as her teeth elongated, past her bottom lip, toward her chin - panic-stricken, she felt them and let out a terrified cry. -Chapter 18, U.S. 299

Ron is the one to go check on Hermione.. and this is always the case 

Hermione, however, leaned against the Owlery wall, folded her arms, and frowned at Ron. "Harry's got a long way to go before he finishes this tournament," she said seriously. "If that was the first task, I hate to think what's coming next." "Right little ray of sunshine, aren't you?" said Ron. -Chapter 21, U.S. 364

Very cute.....and we see just how playful their friendship can be 

"All the good-looking ones taken, Ron?" said Hermione, loftily. "Eloise Midgen starting to look quite pretty now, isn't she? Well, I'm sure you'll find someone somewhere who'll have you."

But Ron was staring at Hermione as though suddenly seeing her in a whole new light. "Hermione, Neville's right - you are a girl..." "Oh well spotted," she said acidly. "Well - can't you come with one of us?" "No, I can't," snapped Hermione. "Oh come on," he said impatiently, "we need partners, we're going to look really stupid if we haven't got any, everyone else has..." "I can't come with you," said Hermione, now blushing, "because I'm already going with someone." "No, you're not!" said Ron. "You just said that to get rid of Neville!" "Oh did I?" said Hermione, and her eyes flashed dangerously. "Just because it's taken you three years to notice, Ron, doesn't mean no one else spotted I'm a girl!" Ron stared at her. Then he grinned again. "Okay, okay, we know you're a girl," he said. "That do? Will you come now?" "I've already told you!" Hermione said very angrily. "I'm going with someone else!" And she stormed off toward the girls' dormitories again. "She's lying," said Ron flatly, watching her go. -Chapter 22, U.S. 400

Here we have something I think is skipped over a lot. Everyone thinks that this is basically Ron insulting Hermione...but pay attention because Ron is basically admitting he thinks Hermione is an attractive girl. This whole ordeal is because he wanted to take out a good looking girl..so when he realizes Hermione is right there. He’s okay with Hermione going with either Harry or him because she’s good looking in his eyes. (you can find people good looking and not be in love with them right away) ...when Ron says ‘you’re not actually going with someone’ of course Hermione takes offence - but I think he didn't mean it in a way thats like ‘youre not good looking enough’ but more a ‘you’re Hermione and you dont focus on these things’ but Hermione ...who is indeed a girl...takes it personal...

"Hermione - who are you going to the ball with?" said Ron. He kept springing this question on her, hoping to startle her into a response by asking it when she least expected it. However, Hermione merely frowned and said, "I'm not telling you, you'll just make fun of me."-Chapter 23, U.S. 404

So now we see Ron is very interested with who Hermione is going with..this is PERFECT 14 year old behaviour ...Ron realizing that Hermione is ATTRACTIVE to other guys..and isnt just their friend.. makes him see her in a whole new light ..this is basically the moment you can be confident that Harry and Ron see Hermione in different ways...at this moment Harry is already attracted to another girl who is going to the ball with someone else..and does not seem to mind that Hermione is going with someone else...this shows that Harry really just see’s Hermione in a platonic matter...for Harry..going with Hermione would have meant he just had someone...but it doesnt bother him that she’s going with someone else..Ron on the other hand is clearly bothered with this fact 

"Hermione," said Ron, looking sideways at her, suddenly frowning, "your teeth..." "What about them?" she said. "Well, they're different... I've just noticed..." "Of course they are - did you expect me to keep those fangs Malfoy gave me?" "No, I mean, they're different to how they were before he put that hex on you... They're all... straight and - and normal-sized." Hermione suddenly smiled very mischievously, and Harry noticed it too: It was a very different smile from the one he remembered. -Chapter 23, U.S. 405

Ron..again..the first to notice things about her...Hermione has now become even more attractive ..This + the fact that she is another guys interest is making Ron be well...attracted to her... 

Hermione chose to watch Harry and the Weasleys' snowball fight rather than join in, and at five o'clock said she was going back upstairs to get ready for the ball.

"What, you need three hours?" said Ron, looking at her incredulously and paying for his lapse in concentration when a large snowball, thrown by George, hit him hard on the side of the head. "Who're you going with?" he yelled after Hermione, but she just waved and disappeared up the stone steps into the castle. -Chapter 23, U.S. 411

He has not given up asking..

"Padma's going to meet you in the entrance hall," she added to Ron. "Right," said Ron, looking around. "Where's Hermione?" -Chapter 23, U.S. 412

So according to Dean..Padma and Parvarti are pretty girls..but Harry (who is fixated on Cho) does not focus on this..and Ron..well we see now the girl who’s caught his eye...and it’s so evidently Hermione ..if it weren't for that...I think Harry and Ron would have had no problem with Padma and Parvarti going with them..but them liking two other people makes them sulky that they’re not going with who they really would like to go with.. .

Where is Hermione?" he said again. -Chapter 23, U.S. 413

So we see where Ron’s focus is..this is where I can say that Ron..100% has a crush on Hermione 

Ron was watching Hermione pass with narrowed eyes. -Chapter 23, U.S. 415

"How's it going?" Harry asked Ron, sitting down and opening a bottle of butterbeer. Ron didn't answer. He was glaring at Hermione and Krum, who were dancing nearby. -Chapter 23, U.S. 420

The jealousy is evident here...here we have Hermione..looking the prettiest she’s ever looked...along with a Ron who clearly likes her now...and he’s mad..he’s mad that it’s not him dancing with her...not only is it not him...but its Viktor Krum..one of his favourite quidditch players. Now some character analysis..Ron is insecure in himself and his abilities ..all his brothers..Harry Potter as his best friend... and Hermione well...he was always close with her...always saw her as someone who well...didn’t compare him to others..Hermione was a friend he had that he didn’t feel like for once in his life he had to prove himself too..yet here she is...looking pretty...and going to a dance with a famous quidditch player...he has to COMPETE once again...his confidence is once again shattered.. 

Hermione came over and sat down in Parvati's empty chair. She was a bit pink in the face from dancing. "Hi," said Harry. Ron didn't say anything. "It's hot, isn't it?" said Hermione, fanning herself with her hand. Viktor's just gone to get some drinks." Ron gave her a withering look. "Viktor?" he said. "Hasn't he asked you to call him Vicky yet?" Hermione looked at him in surprise. "What's up with you?" she said. "If you don't know," said Ron scathingly, "I'm not going to tell you." Hermione stared at him, then at Harry, who shrugged. "Ron, what -?" "He's from Durmstrang!" spat Ron. "He's competing against Harry! Against Hogwarts! You - you're -" Ron was obviously casting around for words strong enough to describe Hermione's crime. "fraternizing with the enemy, that's what you're doing!" Hermione's mouth fell open. "Don't be so stupid!" she said after a moment. "The enemy! Honestly - who was the one who was all excited when they saw him arrive? Who was the one who wanted his autograph? Who's got the model of him up in their dormitory?" Ron chose to ignore this. "I s'pose he asked you to come with him while you were both in the library?" "Yes, he did," said Hermione, the pink patches on her cheeks glowing more brightly. "So what?" "What happened - trying to get him to join spew, were you?" "No, I wasn't! If you really want to know, he - he said he'd been coming up to the library every day to try and talk to me, but he hadn't been able to pluck up the courage!" Hermione said this very quickly, and blushed so deeply that she was the same color as Parvati's robes. "Yeah, well - that's his story," said Ron nastily. "And what's that supposed to mean?" "Obvious, isn't it? He's Karkaroff's student, isn't he? He knows who you hang around with... He's just trying to get closer to Harry - get inside information on him - or get near enough to jinx him -" Hermione looked as though Ron had slapped her. When she spoke, her voice quivered. "For your information, he hasn't asked me one single thing about Harry, not one -" Ron changed tack at the speed of light. "Then he's hoping you'll help him find out what his egg means! I suppose you've been putting your heads together during those cozy little library sessions -" "I'd never help him work out that egg!" said Hermione, looking outraged. "Never. How could you say something like that - I want Harry to win the tournament, Harry knows that, don't you, Harry?" "You've got a funny way of showing it," sneered Ron. "The whole tournament's supposed to be about getting to know foreign wizards and making friends with them!" said Hermione hotly. "No it isn't!" shouted Ron. "It's about winning!" People were starting to stare at them. "Ron," said Harry quietly, "I haven't got a problem with Hermione coming with Krum -" But Ron ignored Harry too. "Why don't you go and find Vicky, he'll be wondering where you are," said Ron. "Don't call him Vicky!" Hermione jumped to her feet and stormed off across the dance floor, disappearing into the crowd. Ron watched her go with a mixture of anger and satisfaction on his face. -Chapter 23, U.S. 421

So I think this is more so Ron trying to make himself feel better...stages of grief..denial..he’s trying to convince himself that the only reason Viktor is with her is to get through Harry...because accepting that he yet again is not good enough is beginning to damage him... 

"Vare is Herm-own-ninny?" said a voice. Krum had just arrived at their table clutching two butterbeers. "No idea," said Ron mulishly, looking up at him. "Lost her, have you?" -Chapter 23, U.S. 423

So we know that 100% Ron is jealous here. 

He climbed into the common room and found Ron and Hermione having a blazing row. Standing ten feet apart, they were bellowing at each other, each scarlet in the face. "Well, if you don't like it, you know what the solution is, don't you?" yelled Hermione; her hair was coming down out of its elegant bun now, and her face was screwed up in anger. "Oh yeah?" Ron yelled back. "What's what?" "Next time there's a ball, ask me before someone else does, and not as a last resort!" Ron mouthed soundlessly like a goldfish out of water as Hermione turned on her heel and stormed up the girls' staircase to bed. Ron turned to look at Harry. "Well," he sputtered, looking thunderstruck, "well - that just proves - completely missed the point -" Harry didn't say anything. He liked being back on speaking terms with Ron too much to speak his mind right now - but he somehow thought that Hermione had gotten the point much better than Ron had. -Chapter 23, U.S. 432

So here we have Hermione admitting that she does like Ron basically to the audience...and now she’s telling him..you take me for granted...yeah other guys find me interesting..other guys find me pretty... so you know what you could have she’s basically like ‘I am that bitch..so appreciate me’ I like this part of Hermione because I think it stemmed from her being offended that Ron thought she lied about being asked to the ball...which she obviously did not take as a ‘you’re Hermione you dont do these things’ and more as a ‘guys would not be interested in you’ and Ron is ..well...he doesnt know how to react because he has seen exactly that....he’s seen that she is not a last resort..and that guys actively seek her and that she is well..in fact..a catch for many guys..and she has basically just told him...you want me? you gotta work for me.. 

Ron and Hermione seemed to have reached an unspoken agreement not to discuss their argument. They were being quite friendly to each other, though oddly formal. -Chapter 24, U.S. 433

So Ron has realized he LIKE likes Hermione..and now he doesn't know what to do...Hermione basically let it slip out that she likes Ron too...and she also doesnt know what to do...so being friends...they decide to do what I think is very reflective of what two close friends would do if they realize they liked eachother.. they try to avoid it...but show tension in the process 

 "It's a lot colder where he comes from," said Hermione. "I supposed it feels quite warm to him." "Yeah, but there's still the giant squid," said Ron. He didn't sound anxious - if anything, he sounded hopeful. Hermione noticed his tone of voice and frowned. "He's really nice, you know," she said. "He's not at all like you'd think, coming from Durmstrang. He likes it much better here, he told me." Ron said nothing. He hadn't mentioned Viktor Krum since the ball, but Harry found a miniature arm under his bed on Boxing Day, which had looked very much as though it had been snapped off a small model figure wearing Bulgarian Quidditch robes. -Chapter 24, U.S. 444

So Hermione is revealing that she doesnt think Viktor is a bad guy..I think this is one of those things where she knows she doesnt truly like Viktor like that ..but he is the first guy to kind of just be romantically interested in her..and he IS a good guy...and Ron of course is furious..because now he knows he likes Hermione...and he’s known her first...and yet here she is..entertaining another guy...another guy who is ‘better’ than him 

Fleur bent down, kissed Harry twice on each cheek (he felt his face burn and wouldn't have been surprised if steam was coming out of his ears again), then said to Ron, "And you too - you 'elped -" "Yeah," said Ron, looking extremely hopeful, "yeah, a bit -" Fleur swooped down on him too and kissed him, Hermione looked simply furious [...] -Chapter 26, U.S. 506

This is so accurate..many people are like why is she mad when she's with Viktor..well because..in real life that’s what happens...jealousy is often the reason you realize you truly do like one person and that person only..have you ever been in the ‘talking stage’ with someone ..find out they're talking to other people and get mad? even though YOU are talking to other people...it’s strange right? well it’s very logical..you can talk to other people because deep down you know your feelings...you know you’re not attached to those other people..but when you see the person you like being with other people..it bothers you because..well you dont know how THEY feel about the other person..and to you it shows that they dont have interest in just you....I say this is 100% true to not only their age but human nature. And is one of the most realistic portrayals of how actual relationships in real life are and how they form.. 

"No, it's just... how did she know Viktor asked me to visit him over the summer?" Hermione blushed scarlet as she said this and determinedly avoided Ron's eyes. "What?" said Ron, dropping his pestle with a loud clunk. "He asked me right after he'd pulled me out of the lake," Hermione muttered. "After he'd got rid of his shark's head, Madam Pomfrey gave us both blankets and then he sort of pulled me away from the judges so they wouldn't hear, and he said, if I wasn't doing anything over the summer, would I like to -" "And what did you say?" said Ron, who had picked up his pestle and was grinding it on the desk, a good six inches from his bowl, because he was looking at Hermione. "And he did say he'd never felt the same way about anyone else," Hermione went on, going so red now that Harry could almost feel the heat coming from her, "but how could Rita Skeeter have heard him? She wasn't there... or was she? Maybe she has got an invisibility cloak; maybe she sneaked onto the grounds to watch the second task..." "And what did you say?" Ron repeated, pounding his pestle down so hard that it dented the desk. -Chapter 27, U.S. 514

Ron’s jealousy .....(also...Hermione looks like she is in part- trying to make Ron jealous..which again...is VERY true to how actual girls at this age act...) honestly really good writing...this is VERY 14 year old behaviour... 

We will see each uzzer again, I 'ope," said Fleur as she reached him, holding out her hand. "I am 'oping to get a job 'ere, to improve my Eenglish." "It's very good already," said Ron in a strangled sort of voice. Fleur smiled at him; Hermione scowled. -Chapter 37, U.S. 724

Again..we see that Ron and Hermione are equally interested in eachother.. 

Krum had come to say good-bye to Hermione. "Could I have a vord?" he asked her. "Oh... yes... all right," said Hermione, looking slightly flustered, and following Krum through the crowd and out of sight. "You'd better hurry up!" Ron called loudly after her. "The carriages'll be here in a minute!" He let Harry keep a watch for the carriages, however, and spent the next few minutes craning his neck over the crowd to try and see what Krum and Hermione might be up to. They returned quite soon. Ron stared at Hermione, but her face was quite impassive. -Chapter 37, U.S. 725

And this is the last glimpse we see in book 4.. okay onto book 5... 

 The door banged open. Hermione came tearing into the room, her cheeks flushed and her hair flying. There was an envelope in her hand. “Did you - did you get it?” She spotted the badge in Harry’s hand and let out a shriek. “I knew it!” she said excitedly, brandishing her letter. “Me too, Harry, me too!” “No,” said Harry quickly, pushing the badge back into Ron’s hand. “It’s Ron, not me.” “It - what?” “Ron’s prefect, no me,” Harry said. “Ron?” said Hermione, her jaw dropping. “But… are you sure? I mean -” She turned red as Ron looked around at her with a defiant expression on his face. “It’s my name on the letter,” he said. “I…” said Hermione, looking thoroughly bewildered. “I… well… wow! Well done, Ron! That’s really -” “Unexpected,” said George, nodding. “No,” said Hermione, blushing harder than ever, “no, it’s not… Ron’s done loads of… he’s really…” -Chapter 9, U.S. 162

So I already outlined how I feel about this..2 things... 1..in the beginning..very Hermione like character (book 1 Hermione would have been like this) Hermione = logic. In this moment she isn't thinking about her own personal feelings for Ron..she’s thinking that it is more LOGICAL that Harry besoms prefect because Ron and Harry do the same in school..but Harry is one of Dumbledore’s favourites..is good at DADA and..has faced more than Ron has... with the triwizard tournament..the Patronus.. the basilisk... and the stone..although Ron did help in every one of those...Harry ..at the end of the day..did face more than both Ron or Hermione herself...so it is more logical that Harry is chosen.. but now realizing its Ron...she’s surprised..because she thought it would have been Harry..but now his brother is saying it in a sense like..Ron isn't prefect worthy..so her direction now points towards Ron..originally she wasn't thinking about what Ron lacked..she was simply thinking about what Harry had...in her mind she wasn't going ‘yes Harry is better than Ron that’s why’ she was just thinking.. ‘Harry is prefect worthy’ ...so now when her direction is pointed towards Ron she starts to think about her own personal feelings about Ron..and why she simply well..likes him...so we see her blushing...people taking it out of context when she can't complete her sentence make it seem like she couldn't think of any good things to say...it was more so she didn’t want to say these things out loud..because they were the reasons why she had a crush on him ...now to Ron...I think this is very important because Ron is usually the one to be like ‘meh yeah I’ll never amount to anything’ but seeing Hermione’s reaction makes him defensive (foreshadowing future events) I actually think him becoming prefect and Hermione’s reaction was a KEY in Ron’s character development..we see ..for the first time..Ron getting defensive about himself..like.. ‘I am not just a nobody’ ...we saw it last book with Hermione to Ron..when she is like ‘see I am a catch- other guys think I’m a catch...’ we see now a Ron who develops a thirst to well..prove himself..show that..just like Hermione did last book..he is a catch... 

"Who're you writing the novel to anyway?" Ron asked Hermione, trying to read the bit of parchment now trailing on the floor. Hermione hitched it up out of sight. "Viktor." "Krum?" "How many other Viktors do we know?" Ron said nothing, but looked disgruntled. -Chapter 21, U.S. 460

We get a bit of GOF seething into OOTP...to highlight that this jealousy is still indeed their and his feelings have not diminished with time 

Harry and Ron both looked at her blankly, and Hermione sighed again. “About You-Know-Who. He said, 'His gift for spreading discord and enmity is very great. We can fight it only by showing an equally strong bond of friendship and trust -’” “How do you remember stuff like that?” asked Ron, looking at her in admiration. “I listen, Ron,” Hermione said with a touch of asperity. -Chapter 12, U.S. 223

So we have book one Hermione..she ..having had her intelligence her whole life...doesn’t realize that other people are not like her.. yes she studies a lot but Hermione is a naturally smart person..and Ron is attracted to it..I think this is AMAZING because a lot of people think that Ron’s insecurities make it so that he wants other people to be lower...but it’s not like that a lot ..he LOVES that Hermione is smart..it’s admirable ...but he himself doesn't like feeling stupid..Hermione’s response is typical book one Hermione..she thinks oh I remember how can’t anyone else? In a way that comes off of rude...instead of blushing and accepting the compliment...but it’s just her character...like even with Krum..instead of finding his accent cute and endearing she lectures him on how he’s not pronouncing her name correctly...but we see a twist here when Ron defends himself...he’s like ‘I listen Hermione...you just have above average intelligence’ ...and now we go forth ..to when Ron becomes keeper...

“Have a butterbeer.” Ron pressed a bottle onto him. “I can’t believe it - where’s Hermione gone?” “She’s there,” said Fred, who was also swigging a butterbeet, and pointed to an armchair by the fire. Hermione was dozing in it, her drink tipping precariously in her hand. “Well, she was pleased when I told her,” said Ron, looking slightly put out. -Chapter 13, U.S. 275

I think him wanting to try out was due to a factor of things...1. him becoming prefect = confidence boost (no he isn’t a nobody he IS capable of doing things..) Hermione's reaction ..wanting to prove that yes IT WAS him who can be a prefect...him getting a new broom...and so forth...there is clearly a thirst to show Hermione that he IS a catch... just like she showed him in book 4. 

“How was practice?” asked Hermione rather coolly half an hour later, as Harry and Ron climbed through the portrait hole into the Gryffindor common room. “It was -” Harry began. “Completely lousy,” said Ron in a hollow voice, sinking into a chair beside Hermione. She looked up at Ron and her frostiness seemed to melt. -Chapter 14, U.S. 294

So we see that Hermione has developed an emotional type of maturity...and it is directed at none other than Ron Weasley ...Ron has yet to see this side of her...and he isn't even paying attention..so unfortunately this goes missed by Ron 

“Good luck, Ron,” said Hermione, standing on tiptoe and kissing him on the cheek. “And you, Harry -” Ron seemed to come to himself slightly as they walked back across the Great Hall. He touched the spot on his face where Hermione had kissed him, looking puzzled, as though he was not quite sure what had just happened. -Chapter 19, U.S. 404

Ron is not used to Hermione showing him affection...however his own nerves has kind of masked his true reaction to this show of affection from Hermione..although they like eachother..we don't really see too much signs of love affection until later on...now this is where their character differences lie..to Hermione ..that must of been a lot..her kissing him on the cheek is like..obviously I am showing you so much affection..But Ron is an insecure being...+ she is still writing to an international quidditch player..Ron likes Hermione and Hermione likes Ron... it is evident here... however Ron does NOT know that Hermione likes him and Hermione has thought that she told Ron she does..

Ron made a noise that might have indicated jubilation or disgust, it was hard to tell. “Because she was crying,” Harry continued heavily. “Oh,” said Ron, his smile fading slightly. “Are you that bad at kissing?” “Dunno,” said Harry, who hadn’t considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. “Maybe I am.” “Of course you’re not,” said Hermione absently, still scribbling away at her letter. “How do you know?” said Ron in a sharp voice. -Chapter 21, U.S. 458

Here we see for the first time..Ron jealous over Hermione and Harry’s relationship....he ..who is friends with her KNOWS he likes her..he is not aware that she likes him.. he WANTS her to like him..hence the thirst to prove himself...but what she’s shown him in terms of love interest so far is Viktor Krum..an international quidditch player..Harry..who is more famous than him...could it be? that she develops feelings for him? he knows that being friends doesnt eliminate developing feelings...because he likes her and she's supposed to be his friend..and could she possibly..have a type? he’s no Harry Potter or Viktor Krum in his eyes .... 

“Thanks for the book, Harry!” she said happily. “I’ve been wanting that New Theory of Numerology for ages! And that perfume is really unusual, Ron.” “No problem,” said Ron. -Chapter 23, U.S. 503

So this is Ron’s way of trying to rue Hermione Granger in his eyes...he’s trying to MAKE him like her...like I said he is completely unaware that she does

“Harry, you’re worse than Ron… Well, no, you’re not,” she sighed, as Ron himself came stumping into the Hall splattered with mud and looking grumpy. -Chapter 26, U.S. 572

This is basically Hermione telling the audience that in her mind..she has shown Ron she likes him..tbh even if I was Ron I would be confused..because she is Hermione Granger and her affectionate level is not up to par... 

Oh, you’re so naive sometimes, Harry. You really think Umbridge will wait for proof?’ said Hermione, who seemed determined to be in a towering temper, and she swept off towards the girls’ dormitories, banging the door behind her. ‘Such a lovely, sweet-tempered girl,’ said Ron, very quietly, prodding his queen forward to beat up one of Harry’s knights.-Chapter 31, U.S. 716

This is beautiful. Why? Ron knows he likes Hermione...and he knows all her qualities..including Hermione WRATH.So for him to say this in his sarcasm shows how knows how Hermione is and why he basically finds it endearing. 

“What do you think about this?” Hermione demanded of Ron, and Harry was reminded irresistibly of Mrs. Weasley appealing to her husband during Harry’s first dinner at Grimmauld Place. -Chapter 29, U.S. 658

And now we see how their relationship is kind of developing into more than a friendship...even Harry notices it... 

Okay onto half blood prince ... 

Don’t you get used to her if she’s staying in the same house?” Harry asked. “Well, you do,” said Ron, “but if she jumps out at you unexpectedly, like then…” “It’s pathetic,” said Hermione furiously, striding away from Ron as far as she could go and turning to face him her arms folded once she had reached the wall.-Chapter 5, U.S. 93

So we see more Hermione jealousy... her interest for Ron has not left over time.. 

It’s Amortentia!” “It is indeed. It seems almost foolish to ask,” said Slughorn, who was looking mightily impressed, “but I assume you know what it does?” “It’s the most powerful love potion in the world!” said Hermione. “Quite right! You recognized it, I suppose, by its distinctive mother-of-pearl sheen?” “And the steam rising in characteristic spirals,” said Hermione enthusiastically, “and it’s supposed to smell differently to each of us, according to what attracts us, and I can smell freshly mown grass and new parchment and -” But she turned slightly pink and did not complete the sentence. -Chapter 9, U.S. 185

Revealed to be Ron’s hair..but all the readers have known since book 4..That Hermione does indeed like Ron..and that of course she would smell him.. 

‘I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden.’ ‘Oh, come on, Harry,’ said Hermione, suddenly impatient. ‘It’s not Quidditch that’s popular, it’s you! You’ve never been more interesting and, frankly, never more fanciable.’ Ron gagged on a large piece of kipper. Hermione spared him one look of disdainbefore turning back to Harry.

[…]

‘And you’ve been through all the persecution from the Ministry when they were trying to make out you were unstable and a liar. You can still see the marks where that evil woman made you write with your own blood, but you stuck to your story anyway…’ ‘You can still see where those brains got hold of me in the Ministry, look,’ said Ron, shaking back his sleeves. ‘And it doesn’t hurt that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer, either,’ Hermione finished, ignoring Ron. ‘I’m tall,’ said Ron inconsequentially.

This is the first time we’ve heard Hermione call either one of the boys fancible..and it's targeted at Harry..remember last book when Ron is conflicted..does Hermione have a type? Is it like what Rita says? Famous people and what not...But we have a slightly different Ron..one that wants to prove himself..the reasons she points to Harry being fancible are traits Ron realizes he has... And guess what? I bet you 100 dollars that Lavender was not the only one who had a crush on Ron...I definitely think Harry had ‘admirers’ but I am willing to bet that so did Ron.. Harry would have more..by default..with the triwizard tournament ..now Hermione just ignoring Ron because in her mind she knows she likes Ron so she’s just educating Harry as to why people are trying out..not telling Harry that she is personally attracted to him..which of course Ron doesnt see this way 

What did surprise [Harry] was that when Ron drew level with them, Parvati suddenly nudged Lavender, who looked round and gave Ron a wide smile. Ron blinked at her, then returned the smile uncertainly. His walk instantly became something more like a strut. Harry resisted the temptation to laugh, remembering that Ron had refrained from doing so after Malfoy had broken Harry’s nose. Hermione, however, looked cold and distant all the way down to the stadium through the cool, misty drizzle, and departed to find a place in the stands without wishing Ron luck.

Like I said..a lot of girls probably crushed on Ron..but Ron..who still has no idea Hermione likes him..is surprised by one OUTWARDLY showing interest..and of course Hermione is jealous 

“You did brilliantly, Ron!” This time it really was Hermione running toward them from the stands; Harry saw Lavender walking off the pitch, arm in arm with Parvati, a rather grumpy expression on her face. Ron looked extremely pleased with himself and even taller than usual as he grinned at the team and at Hermione. -Chapter 11, U.S. 226

First time Hermione has complemented Ron...and his grin says everything.. 

“’Slug Club,’” repeated Ron with a sneer worthy of Malfoy. “It’s pathetic. Well, I hope you enjoy your party. Why don’t you try hooking up with McLaggen, then Slughorn can make you King and Queen slug-” “We’re allowed to bring guests,” said Hermione, who from some reason had turned a bright, boiling scarlet, “and I was going to ask you to come, but if you think it’s that stupid then I won’t bother.” Harry suddenly wished the pod had flown a little farther, so that he need not have been sitting here with the pair of them. Unnoticed by either, he seized the bowl that contained the pod and began to try and open it by the noisiest and most energetic means he could think of; unfortunately, he could still hear every word of their conversation. “You were going to ask me?” asked Ron, in a completely different voice. “Yes,” said Hermione angrily. “But obviously if you’d rather I hooked up with McLaggen…” There was a pause while Harry continued to pound the resilient pod with a trowl. “No, I wouldn’t,” said Ron, in a very quiet voice. -Chapter 14, U.S. 282

So...Ron is confused...the different voice says it all..Ron as of now has NO IDEA that Hermione likes him....Ron was upset in the beginning because this is just another thing trying to bring him down..it’s like the universe is trying to be like ‘Ron you’re not good enough’ when Hermione...goes out of her way to say she was going to ask him... he’s surprised..and now he’s thinking ..does Hermione ...do I have a chance with her after all? Keep in mind that she doesn’t actually ask him...So then they act nicer to eachother and it looks like this might just be the book they get together..as Hermione has now revealed that she does indeed like him

Ron and Harry were the last two in the changing room. They were just about to leave when Hermione entered. She was twisting her Gryffindor scarf in her hands and looked upset but determined. ‘I want a word with you, Harry.’ She took a deep breath. ‘You shouldn’t have done it. You heard Slughorn, it’s illegal.’ ‘What are you going to do, turn us in?’ demanded Ron. ‘What are you two talking about?’ asked Harry, turning away to hang up his robes so that neither of them would see him grinning. ‘You know perfectly well what we’re talking about!’ said Hermione shrilly. ‘You spiked Ron’s juice with lucky potion at breakfast! Felix Felicis!’ ‘No I didn’t,’ said Harry, turning back to face them both. ‘Yes you did, Harry, and that’s why everything went right, there were Slytherin players missing and Ron saved everything!

This is, I think, more damaging than Ginny doing what she did ...Ron has a thirst to prove himself with Hermione....and then they find out that he didn't have Felix Felicis... But Hermione yet again..is being book one Hermione..by logic..all the Slytherin players were missing..but that was just luck..hermione doesnt like luck... or horoscopes..or predictions..she doesnt think this way..she uses logic..so although she doesnt mean to in my opinion..she is taking a dig at Ron..it is harsh...and it is her character flaw..and of course Ron (and anyone else) is hurt by it..because it comes off more as a lack of faith in Ron’s abilities opposed to her just trying to logic the situation out.. 

Harry's snogged Cho Chang! And Hermione snogged Viktor Krum, it's only you who acts like it's something disgusting, Ron, and that's because you've got about as much experience as a twelve-year-old!"

Ron’s basically had it at this point. Hermione couldn't believe he was prefect...he makes the quidditch team..she can't believe he’s good... she’s called Harry this whole catch...he isn't in the slug club.. now he’s thinking..she doesnt even like me because, like I thought, she thinks im not good enough.originally it was like she might be shy..but no she isnt..she kissed Viktor...so .she was going to ask me to the dinner for what? for pity?and we have basically a Hermione yule ball reaction..Ron has had ENOUGH. he’s tired of it..he isnt trash..he has good traits..if she doesnt recognize them thats her loss..he’s not going to fight for her approval... so he kisses Lavender...because SHE has a crush on him..and she hasn't made it so bloody difficult and she likes him for being..well..Ron.. 

There was a horrible, swelling, billowing silence. Hermione was staring at Ron, who refused to look at her, but said with an odd mixture of bravado and awkwardness, "Hi, Harry! Wondered where you'd got to!" Hermione slid off the desk. The little flock of golden birds continued to twitter in circles around her head so that she looked like a strange, feathery model of the solar system. "You shouldn't keep Lavender waiting outside," she said quietly. "She'll wonder where you've gone." She walked very slowly and erectly toward the door. Harry glanced at Ron, who was looking relieved that nothing worse had happened. "Oppungo!" came a shriek from the doorway. Harry turned around to see Hermione pointing her wand at Ron, her expression wild: The little flock of birds was speeding like a hail of fat golden bullets toward Ron, who yelped and covered his face with his hands, but the birds attacked, pecking and clawing at every bit of flesh they could reach. "Gerremoffme!" he yelled, but with one last look of vindictive fury, Hermione wrenched open the door and disappeared through it. Harry thought he heard a sob before it slammed. -Chapter 14, U.S. 302

So now Ron feels awkward..because Hermione does not hide how she feels about this...but this isn’t just jealousy anymore...Hermione is UPSET. So now he’s thinking...she....she does like me? she did want to ask me because she likes me? but why is she like this then....and overall confusion..because now he has lavender..the first girl who has shown him outward interest...but he cannot hide that he DOES have feelings for Hermione..

Ron, whose hands and forearms still bore scratches and cuts from Hermione's bird attack, was taking a defensive and resentful tone. "She can't complain," he told Harry. "She snogged Krum. So she's found out someone wants to snog me too. Well, it's a free country. I haven't done anything wrong."-Chapter 15, U.S. 304

This is perfect... he’s basically saying...yeah I’m a catch too..whats the problem? 

“He’s at perfect liberty to kiss whomever he likes,” said Hermione, while the librarian, Madam Pince, prowled the shelves behind them. “I really couldn’t care less.” She raised her quill and dotted an i so ferociously that she punctured a hole in her parchment.-Chapter 15, U.S. 305

so she’s clearly upset..but you know Hermione, she doesnt admit these things. 

"Hi, Parvati!" said Hermione, ignoring Ron and Lavender completely. "Are you going to Slughorn's party tonight?" "No invite," said Parvati gloomily. "I'd love to go, though, it sounds like it's going to be really good... You're going, aren't you?" "Yes, I'm meeting Cormac at eight, and we're -" There was a noise like a plunger being withdrawn from a blocked sink and Ron surfaced. Hermione acted as though she had not seen or heard anything. "- we're going up to the party together." "Cormac?" said Parvati. "Cormac McLaggen, you mean?" "That's right," said Hermione sweetly. "The one who almost" - she put a great deal of emphasis on the word - "became Gryffindor Keeper." "Are you going out with him, then?" asked Parvati, wide-eyed. "Oh - yes - didn't you know?" said Hermione, with a most un-Hermione-ish giggle. "No!" said Parvati, looking positively agog at this piece of gossip. "Wow, you like your Quidditch players, don't you? First Krum, then McLaggen..." "I like really good Quidditch players," Hermione corrected her, still smiling. "Well, see you... Got to go and get ready for the party..." -Chapter 15, U.S. 313

Here we see a different side of Hermione..a mean Hermione...now...this is HONESTLY typical 16 year old behaviour...and although its mean..its pretty SPOT ON to how a 16 year old girl would react to a guy she likes..a guy she thought she told she likes..a guy who revealed that he likes her ... getting it on with another girl right after (unaware of Ginny)...and well not seeing what was wrong with her whole Felix nonsense... 

“Did you have a good Christmas?” “Yeah,” said Ron at once, “pretty eventful, Rufus Scrim -” “I’ve got something for you, Harry,” said Hermione, neither looking at Ron nor giving any sign that she had heard him. -Chapter 17, U.S. 351

This is interesting...Hermione is being really mean to Ron during this time..giving him shit..now a couple of chapters ago Ron would have been really hurt by her words..to a point to where he wouldn't talk to her..but now Ron is realizing just how mad she is at the lavender ordeal..and he’s realizing..she’s this mad..it means well..she likes me... so he’s taking all the shit she’s giving him because he now KNOWS she’s trying to piss him off. 

Hermione gave an almost inaudible sniff. She had been exceptionally quiet all day. Having hurtled, white-faced, up to Harry outside the hospital wing and demanded to know what had happened, she had taken almost no part in Harry and Ginny's obsessive discussion about how Ron had been poisoned, but merely stood behind them, clench-jawed and frightened-looking, until at last they had been allowed in to see him. -Chapter 19, U.S. 400

So now Ron has been poisoned..and Hermione has been a bitch to him for the past 2 months...and now she feels guilty..because the reason she's been a bitch to him is because he hurt her..because she likes him..because he decided to be with another girl when she thought they were going to finally become a thing...and now she puts her own personal anger aside because above all else Ron is her friend and she does love him.... and she does care for him and she always will.. 

"Er-my-nee," croaked Ron unexpectedly from between them. -Chapter 19, U.S. 402

Well now Hermione is well...Ron just exposed himself..so she knows him being with Lavender doesnt mean he doesnt like her... 

He stopped talking very suddenly. Lavender Brown was standing at the foot of the marble staircase looking thunderous. "Hi," said Ron nervously. "C'mon," Harry muttered to Hermione, and they sped past, though not before they heard Lavender say, "Why didn't you tell me you were getting out today? And why was she with you?" Ron looked both sulky and annoyed when he appeared at breakfast half an hour later, and though he sat with Lavender, Harry did not see them exchange a word all the time they were together. Hermione was acting as though she was quite oblivious to all of this, but once or twice Harry saw an inexplicable smirk cross her face. -Chapter 20, U.S. 425

Now..Lavender doesnt deserve this but it so so sparingly typical 16 year old girl behaviour...that its like ..refreshing..Hermione..although smart..and responsible..is still a teen girl...the guy she likes is fighting with his girlfriend about her..and his girlfriend is jealous of her... and he said her name in his sleep...she’s like yess f you lavender..stay away from MY MAN..thats right be jealous..and her seeing Ron unhappy with it..it’s like yep he wants me dont forget it. 

"How d'you spell 'belligerent'?" said Ron, shaking his quill very hard while staring at his parchment. "It can't be B - U - M -" "No, it isn't," said Hermione, pulling Ron's essay toward her. "And 'augury' doesn't being O - R -G either. What kind of quill are you using?" "It's one of Fred and George's spell-check ones... but I think the charm must be wearing off..." "Yes, it must," said Hermione, pointing at the title of his essay, "because we were asked how we'd deal with dementors, not 'Dugbogs,' and I don't remember you changing your name to 'Roonil Wazlib' either." "Ah no!" said Ron, staring horror-struck at the parchment. "Don't say I'll have to write the whole thing out again!" "It's okay, we can fix it," said Hermione, pulling the essay toward her and taking out her wand. "I love you, Hermione," said Ron, sinking back in his chair, rubbing his eyes wearily. Hermione turned faintly pink, but merely said, "Don't let Lavender hear you saying that." -Chapter 21, U.S. 449

Yep... he likes me ... she's thinking.. and of course she brings up lavender because she wants him to end it with her 

"No joy," said Harry, as Ron joined them. "Bad luck, mate, but you'll pass next time - we can take it together."

"Yeah, I s'pose," said Ron grumpily. "But half an eyebrow! Like that matters!" "I know," said Hermione soothingly, "it does seem really harsh..." -Chapter 22, U.S. 476

Hermione showing affection now because she knows Ron likes her.. 

"Ron, you're making it snow," said Hermione patiently, grabbing his wrist and redirecting his wand away from the ceiling from which, sure enough, large white flakes had started to fall. Lavender Brown, Harry noticed, glared at Hermione from a neighboring table through very red eyes, and Hermione immediately let go of Ron's arm. "Oh yeah," said Ron, looking down at his shoulders in vague surprise. "Sorry... looks like we've all got horrible dandruff now..." He brushed some of the fake snow off Hermione's shoulder. Lavender burst into tears. -Chapter 24, U.S. 514

I feel sorry for lavender here and I think Ron and Hermione also feel guilty...but now they’re over...and they both kind of know what’s up.. 

Ron, he saw, was now holding Hermione and stroking her hair while she sobbed into his shoulder, tears dripping from the end of his own long nose. -Chapter 30, U.S. 647

And now we see more relationship-y affection... 

Ron tripped dazedly toward Harry and Hermione. "You're okay," he mumbled, before Hermione flew at him and hugged him tightly. "I thought - I thought -" "'M all right," said Ron, patting her on the back. "'M fine." "Ron was great," said Tonks warmly, reliquishing her hold on Lupin. "Wonderful. Stunned one of the Death Eaters, straight to the head, and when you're aiming at a moving target from a flying broom -" "You did?" said Hermione, gazing up at Ron with her arms still around his neck. "Always the tone of surprise," he said a little grumpily, breaking free. -Chapter 5, U.S. 76

So now we have different setting..there is a war approaching..seriousness..but they’re physically showing more affection then we have seen... their exchanges are no longer friend exchanges... but people who have a clear interest in eachother 

Don't!" squealed Hermione. Startled, Harry looked over just in time to see her burst into tears over her copy of Spellman's Syllabary. "Oh no," said Harry, struggling to get up from the old camp bed. "Hermione, I wasn't trying to upset -" But with a great creaking of rusty bedsprings, Ron bounded off the bed and got there first. One arm around Hermione, he fished in his jeans pocket and withdrew a revolting-looking handkerchief that he had used to clean out the oven earlier. Hastily pulling out his wand, he pointed it at the rag and said, "Tergeo." The wand siphoned off most of the grease. Looking rather pleased with himself, Ron handed the slightly smoking handkerchief to Hermione. "Oh... thanks, Ron... I'm sorry..." She blew her nose and hiccuped. "It's just so awful, isn't it? R-right after Dumbledore... I j-just never imagined Mad-Eye dying, somehow, he seemed so tough!" "Yeah, I know," said Ron, giving her a squeeze. "But you know what he'd say to us if he was here?" "'C-constant vigilance,'" said Hermione, mopping her eyes. "That's right," said Ron, nodding. "He'd tell us to learn from what happened to him. And what I've learned is not to trust that cowardly little squit, Mundungus." Hermione gave a shaky laugh and leaned forward to pick up two more books. - Chapter 6, U.S. 94

And now we see...sensitive Ron..it’s so strange to see after all these books..but it makes sense.. this is a more serious time..and they’re older..and then of course..the book he read... I think his experience with Lavender was basically the kick that told him..you know what..I’m going to show this girl how much I like her..because I know she feels something for me..so I’m going to woo her over.. 

"This isn't your average book," said Ron. "It's pure gold: Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches. Explains everything you need to know about girls. If only I'd had this last year I'd have known exactly how to get rid of Lavender and I would've known how to get going with... Well, Fred and George gave me a copy, and I've learned a lot. You'd be surprised, it's not all about wandwork, either."- Chapter 7, U.S. 113

Hermione is confusing you can't blame him honestly. 

Hermione made purple and gold streamers erupt from the end of her wand and drape themselves artistically over the trees and bushes. "Nice," said Ron, as with one final flourish of her wand, Hermione turned the leaves on the crabapple tree to gold. "You've really got an eye for that sort of thing." "Thank you, Ron!" said Hermione, looking both pleased and a little confused.- Chapter 7, U.S. 118

Definitely taken from the book..but its great..it shows Ron taking initiative with Hermione..he’s trying to figure out how to get his friend to become his girlfriend...so this whole starting to be more romantic slowly thing..it’s perfect... 

Hermione looked pleasurably flustered, but this time Krum had not come to compliment her. With a scowl on his face he said, "Who is that man in the yellow?" "That's Xenophilius Lovegood, he's the father of a friend of ours," said Ron. His pugnacious tone indicated that they were not about to laugh at Xenophilius, despite the clear provocation. "Come and dance," he added abruptly to Hermione. She looked taken aback, but pleased too, and got up. They vanished together into the growing throng on the dance floor. "Ah, they are together now?" asked Krum, momentarily distracted. "Er - sort of," said Harry. -Chapter 8, U.S. 147

I like that he doesn’t even ask her... this is what we see for the first time...a less teenager like Ron and a more adult like Ron.. 

"You're amazing, you are," said Ron, handing her his bundled up robes. "Thank you," said Hermione, managing a small smile as she pushed the robes into the bags.- Chapter 9, U.S. 162

We see that Ron is indeed a gentleman when he wants to be..and that he is capable of being emotionally mature 

"Family safe, do not reply, we are being watched." The Patronus dissolved into nothingness. Ron let out a noise between a whimper and a groan and dropped onto the sofa: Hermione joined him, gripping his arm. "They're all right, they're all right!" she whispered, and Ron half laughed and hugged her. - Chapter 9, U.S. 173

More outward physical affection.. 

Harry glanced over at the dark shapes they made on the floor beside him. Ron had a fit of gallantry and insisted that Hermione sleep on the cushions from the sofa, so that her silhouette was raised above his. Her arm curved to the floor, her finger's inches from Ron's. Harry wondered whether they had fallen asleep holding hands. - Chaper 10, U.S. 176

Yes they did...and it was 100% Ron who instigated it... 

Ron glanced at Hermione, then said, "What if purebloods and half-bloods swear a Muggle-born's part of their family? I'll tell everyone Hermione's my cousin -" Hermione covered Ron's hand with hers and squeezed it. "Thank you, Ron, but I couldn't let you -" "You won't have a choice," said Ron fiercely, gripping her hand back. "I'll teach you my family tree so you can answer questions on it." - Chapter 11, U.S. 209

Outward physical affection between them...as we see Ron is not shy to grip her hand right back. 

"Don't look at me like that!" he snapped at Hermione. "Don't you start on her!" snarled Ron.- Chapter 11, U.S. 215

Ron making it clear that although they are all friends..Hermione is his love interest and he won’t let guys disrespect her..even if it’s Harry.. 

"Snape could send Phineas Nigellus to look inside this house for him," Hermione explained to Ron as she resumed her seat. "But let him try it now, all Phineas Nigellus will be able to see is the inside of my handbag." "Good thinking!" said Ron, looking impressed. "Thank you," smiled Hermione, pulling her soup toward her.- Chapter 12, U.S. 228

Some more 12 fail safe action..Ron...even in the midst of all of this..remembers to pay Hermione compliments because well..he wants to be a gentleman to her.. 

Respect?" Harry repeated, but Hermione shot him a warning look; apparently he was not to argue with Ron while the latter was in such a weakened condition.- Chapter 14, U.S. 273

Same as Ron..Hermione makes it clear that even though they’re all friends... Ron is not to be mistreated because that is well..her man.. 

Hermione was watching Ron fret over the fate of the Cameroles, and there was such tenderness in her expression that Harry felt as if he had surprised her in the act of kissing him.- Chapter 14, U.S. 274

So like has now turned into love... Ron..who has been paying her compliments..shown his maturity..and now his amazing character..has indeed one over the love of Hermione Granger 

Ron wrenched the chain from over his head and cast the locket into a nearby chair. He turned to Hermione. "What are you doing?" "What do you mean? "Are you staying, or what?" "I..." She looked anguished. "Yes - yes, I'm staying. Ron, we said we'd go with Harry, we said we'd help -" "I get it. You choose him." "Ron, no - please - come back, come back!" She was impeded by her own Shield Charm; by the time she had removed it, he had already stormed into the night. Harry stood quite still and silent, listening to her sobbing and calling Ron's name amongst the trees. After a few minutes she returned, her sopping hair plastered to her face. "He's g-g-gone! Disapparated!" She threw herself into a chair, curled up, and started to cry.- Chapter 15, U.S. 309

Ron..even with the influence of the locket.. did not forget about Hermione..he asked her..even with the locket telling him that Hermione didn't care about him..and her staying just validating the locket. Hermione is now devastated at this point..because he was JUST gentleman Ron..just making jokes...just showing her that he cared..how could he switch so quickly? Of course...the locket..she knows its the locket.. she feels down with it as well..it keeps telling her about her parents..how she will never fit in the wizarding world as a muggle born..but she never had any doubts about Ron...Ron only gave her doubts when Lavender.. and that ended...this locket picks up on INSECURITIES... Hermione is a confident young woman when it comes to her relationships..her fears are in not doing well...not in how others perceive her..and we know how Harry was.. his insecurity was that people doubted him..the boy who lied...now we have Ron..his insecurities is that he is not good enough..not for Harry..not for Hermione...and that he was useless..why take part of a war you dont contribute to? He’s holding them BACK. With his injury...He is RUINING their chances of defeating voldemort..they would be better without him... its SHOULD be the two of them..everyone else thinks so.....so he leaves...and she doesnt reach Ron in time...the moment the lockets off he realizes...what he’d done..his love for them has always ALWAYS conquered his insecurities..but its too late. 

"Why return? We were better without you, happier without you, glad of your absence... We laughed at your stupidity, your cowardice, your presumption -" "Presumption!" echoed the Riddle-Hermione, who was more beautiful and yet more terrible than the real Hermione: She swayed, cackling, before Ron, who looked horrified yet transfixed, the sword hanging pointlessly at his side. "Who could look at you, who would ever look at you, beside Harry Potter? What have you ever done, compared with the Chosen One? What are you, compared with the Boy Who Lived?" "Ron, stab it, STAB IT!" Harry yelled, but Ron did not move: His eyes were wide, and the Riddle-Harry and Riddle-Hermione were reflected in them, their hair swirling like flames, their eyes shining red, their voices lifted in an evil duet. "Your mother confessed," sneered Riddle-Harry, while Riddle-Hermione jeered, "that she would have preferred me as a son, would be glad to exchange..." "Who wouldn't prefer him, what woman would take you, you are nothing, nothing, nothing to him," crooned Riddle-Hermione, and she stretched like a snake and entwined herself around Riddle-Harry, wrapping him in a close embrace: Their lips met. On the ground in front of them, Ron's face filled with anguish. He raised the sword high, his arms shaking. "Do it, Ron!" Harry yelled. Ron looked toward him, and Harry thought he saw a trace of scarlet in his eyes. "Ron -?" The sword flashed, plunged: Harry threw himself out of the way, there was a clang of metal and a long, drawn-out scream. Harry whirled around, slipping in the snow, wand held ready to defend himself: but there was nothing to fight. The monstrous versions of himself and Hermione were gone: There was only Ron, standing there with the sword held slackly in his hand, looking down at the shattered remains of the locket on the flat rock. Slowly, Harry walked back to him, hardly knowing what to say or do. Ron was breathing heavily: His eyes were no longer red at all, but their normal blue; they were also wet. Harry stooped, pretending he had not seen, and picked up the broken Horcrux. Ron had pierced the glass in both windows: Riddle's eyes were gone, and the stained silk lining of the locket was smoking slightly. The thing that had lived in the Horcrux had vanished; torturing Ron had been its final act. The sword clanged as Ron dropped it. He had sunk to his knees, his head in his arms. He was shaking, but not, Harry realized, from cold. Harry crammed the broken locket into his pocket, knelt down beside Ron, and placed a hand cautiously on his shoulder. He took it as a good sign that Ron did not throw it off. "After you left," he said in a low voice, grateful for the fact that Ron's face was hidden, "she cried for a week. Probably longer, only she didn't want me to see. There were loads of nights when we never even spoke to each other. With you gone..." He could not finish it; it was only now that Ron was here again that Harry fully realized how much his absence had cost them. "She's like my sister," he went on. "I love her like a sister and I reckon she feels the same way about me. It's always been like that. I thought you knew."- Chapter 19, U.S. 375

Like I said... 

She saw Ron, who stood there holding the sword and dripping onto the threadbare carpet. Harry backed into a shadowy corner, slipped off Ron's rucksack, and attempted to blend in with the canvas. Hermione slid out of her bunk and moved like a sleepwalker toward Ron, her eyes upon his pale face. She stopped right in front of him, her lips slightly parted, her eyes wide. Ron gave a weak, hopeful smile and half raised his arms. Hermione launched herself forward and started punching every inch of him that she could reach. "Ouch - ow - gerroff! What the -? Hermione - OW!" "You - complete - arse - Ronald - Weasley!" She punctuated every word with a blow: Ron backed away, shielding his head as Hermione advanced. "You - crawl - back - here - after - weeks - and - weeks - oh, where's my wand?" She looked as though ready to wrestle it out of Harry's hands and he reacted instictively. "Protego!" The invisible shield erupted between Ron and Hermione: The force of it knocked her backward onto the floor. Spitting hair out of her mouth, she leapt up again. "Hermione!" Harry said. "Calm -" "I will not calm down!" she screamed. Never before had he seen her lose control like this; she looked quite demented. "Give me back my wand! Give it to me!" "Hermione, will you please -" "Don't you tell me what to do, Harry Potter!" she screeched. "Don't you dare! Give it back now! And YOU!" She was pointing at Ron in dire accusation: It was like a malediction, and Harry could not blame Ron for retreating several steps. "I came running after you! I called you! I begged you to come back!" "I know," Ron said, "Hermione, I'm sorry, I'm really -" "Oh, you're sorry!" She laughed, a high pitched, out-of-control sound; Ron looked at Harry for help, but Harry merely grimaced his helplessness. "You come back after weeks - weeks - and you think it's all going to be all right if you say sorry?" "Well, what else can I say?" Ron shouted, and Harry was glad that Ron was fighting back. "Oh, I don't know!" yelled Hermione with awful sarcasm. "Rack your brains, Ron, that should only take a couple of seconds -" "Hermione," interjected Harry, who considered this a lot blow, "he just saved my -" "I don't care!" she screamed. "I don't care what he's done! Weeks and weeks, we could have been dead for all he knew -" "I knew you weren't dead!" bellowed Ron, drowning her voice for the first time, and approaching as close as he could with the Shield Charm between them. "Harry's all over the Prophet, all over the radio, they're looking for you everywhere, all these rumors and mental stories, I knew I'd hear straight off if you were dead, you don't know what it's been like -" "What it's been like for you?" Her voice was now so shrill only bats would be able to hear it soon, but she had reached a level of indignation that rendered her temporarily speechless, and Ron seized his opportunity. "I wanted to come back the minute I'd Disapparated, but I walked straight into a gang of Snatchers, Hermione, and I couldn't go anywhere!"- Chapter 19, U.S. 379

So Hermione is obviously being cruel..but its justified..he hurt her..she loves him and he left her...but he explains... and of course she hasn't witnessed what we and Harry all have

When Hermione returned to her bunk, Harry lowered his voice. "You only agreed to try and get back in her good books." "All's fair in love and war," said Ron brightly, "and this is a bit of both."- Chapter 20, U.S. 396

Ron has revealed he loves her.. 

"Get - off - her!" Ron shouted. There was the unmistakable sound of knuckles hitting flesh: Ron grunted in pain and Hermione screamed, "No! Leave him alone, leave him alone!" "Your boyfriend's going to have worse than that done to him if he's on my list," said the horribly familiar, rasping voice.- Chapter 23, U.S. 447

Take these prisoners down to the cellar, Greyback." "Wait," said Bellatrix sharply. "All except... except for the Mudblood." Greyback gave a grunt of pleasure. "No!" shouted Ron. "You can have me, keep me!" Bellatrix hit him across the face; the blow echoed around the room. "If she dies under questioning, I'll take you next," she said.- Chapter 23, U.S. 463

"Reckon she'll let me have a bit of the girl when she's finished with her?" Greyback crooned as he forced them along the corridor. "I'd say I'll get a bite or two, wouldn't you, ginger?" Harry could feel Ron shaking.- Chapter 23, U.S. 463

The echoing bang of the slammed cellar door had not died away before there was a terrible, drawn-out scream from directly above them. "HERMIONE!" Ron bellowed, and he started to writhe and struggle against the ropes tying them together, so that Harry staggered. "HERMIONE!" "Be quiet!" Harry said. "Shut up, Ron, we need to work out a way -" "HERMIONE! HERMIONE!"

- Chapter 23, U.S. 464

I'm going to ask you again! Where did you get this sword? Where?" "We found it - we found it - PLEASE!" Hermione screamed again: Ron struggled harder than ever, and the rusty nail slipped onto Harry's wrist.

- Chapter 23, U.S. 465

From above came Bellatrix's voice. "You are lying, filthy Mudblood, and I know it! You have been inside my vault at Gringotts! Tell the truth, tell the truth!" Another terrible scream - "HERMIONE!" "What else did you take? What else have you got? Tell me the truth or, I swear, I shall run you through with this knife!" "There!" Harry felt the ropes fall away and turned, rubbing his wrists, to see Ron running around the cellar, looking up at the low ceiling, searching for a trapdoor.

- Chapter 23, U.S. 465

"What else did you take, what else? ANSWER ME! CRUCIO!" Hermione's screams echoed off the walls upstairs, Ron was half sobbing as he pounded the walls with his fists [...]

- Chapter 23, U.S. 466

He tilted the shard of mirror this way and that, and saw nothing reflected there but the walls and ceiling of their prison, and upstairs Hermione was screaming worse than ever, and next to him Ron was bellowing, "HERMIONE! HERMIONE!"

"And I think," said Bellatrix's voice, "we can dispose of the Mudblood. Greyback, take her if you want her." "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ron had burst into the drawing room; Bellatrix looked around, shocked; she turned her wand to face Ron instead -- Chapter 23, U.S. 472

Ron doesn't care about anything else here..not the greater good..not the war..not Voldemort..just Hermione..and now we SEE that Ron truly loves this woman...he disarms Bellatrix..in this moment he doesnt CARE who it is..and all he is focused on is Hermione ..this shows the readers that Ron...does not view as Hermione as just a crush..or a girl he likes..or a friend...he loves Hermione to a point no one else in that room does.. 

Hermione was wrapped in a borrowed dressing gown, pale and unsteady on her feet; Ron put an arm around her when she reached him.- Chapter 24, U.S. 480

He is her comfort...and we now know that its Ron and Hermione... 

And then he skidded around a final corner and with a yell of mingled relief and fury he saw them: Ron and Hermione, both with their arms full of large, curved, dirty yellow objects, Ron with a broomstick under his arm. "Where the hell have you been?" Harry shouted. "Chamber of Secrets," said Ron. "Chamber - what?" said Harry, coming to an unsteady halt before them. "It was Ron, all Ron's idea!" said Hermione breathlessly. "Wasn't it absolutely brilliant? There we were, after you left, and I said to Ron, even if we find the other one, how are we going to get rid of it? We still hadn't got rid of the cup! And then he thought of it! The basilisk!" "What the -?" "Something to get rid of Horcruxes," said Ron simply. Harry's eyes dropped to the objects clutched in Ron and Hermione's arms; great curved fangs, torn, he now realized, from the skull of a dead basilisk. "But how did you get in there?" he asked, staring from the fangs to Ron. "You need to speak Parseltongue!" "He did!" whispered Hermione. "Show him, Ron!" Ron made a horrible strangled hissing noise. "It's what you did to open the locket," he told Harry apologetically. "I had to have a few goes to get it right, but," he shrugged modestly, "we got there in the end." "He was amazing!" said Hermione. "Amazing!"- Chapter 31, U.S. 623

A twist...Hermione complimenting Ron... and we see huge character growth in Ron..instead of basking in it..he is being nonchalant ...because its bigger than his insecurities now..and he knows it’s about just keeping Hermione safe and ending this war 

Hang on a moment!" said Ron sharply. "We've forgotten someone!" "Who?" asked Hermione. "The house-elves, they'll all be down in the kitchen, won't they?" "You mean we ought to get them fighting?" asked Harry. "No," said Ron seriously, "I mean we should tell them to get out. We don't want any more Dobbies, do we? We can't order them to die for us -" There was a clatter as the basilisk fangs cascaded out of Hermione's arms. Running at Ron, she flung them around his neck and kissed him full on the mouth. Ron threw away the fangs and broomstick he was holding and responded with such enthusiasm that he lifted Hermione off her feet. "Is this the moment?" Harry asked weakly, and when nothing happened except Ron and Hermione gripped each other still more firmly and swayed on the spot, he raised his voice. "OI! There's a war going on here!" Ron and Hermione broke apart, their arms still around each other. "I know, mate," said Ron, who looked as though he had recently been hit on the back of the head with a Bludger, "so it's now or never, isn't it?" "Never mind that, what about the Horcrux?" Harry shouted. "D'you think you could just - just hold it in until we've got the diadem?" "Yeah - right - sorry," said Ron, and he and Hermione set about gathering up fangs, both pink in the face.- Chapter 31, U.S. 625

And its official...they might die..they know they love eachother...and Hermione..overridden by passion has done the most un-Hermione-ish thing...she has kissed Ron...in the middle of a war..and Ron is eager..and this is it..they know it's them..he knows he likes her..she knows he likes him...and they might lose eachother..and so they kiss..and it’s with passion..because they love eachother... 

Rose, who was already wearing her brand-new Hogwarts robes, beamed at him. "Parked all right, then?" Ron asked Harry. "I did. Hermione didn't believe I could pass a Muggle driving test, did you? She though I'd have to Confund the examiner." "No, I didn't," said Hermione, "I had complete faith in you." "As a matter of fact, I did Confund him," Ron whispered to Harry, as together they lifted Albus's trunk and owl onto the train. "I only forgot to look in the wing mirror, and let's face it, I can use a Supersensory Charm for that." Back on the platform, they found Lily and Hugo, Rose's younger brother, having an animated discussion about which House they would be sorted into when they finally went to Hogwarts. "If you're not in Gryffindor, we'll disinherit you," said Ron, "but no pressure." "Ron!" - Epilogue, U.S. 755

Ron although talking about Hermione's lack of faith in him...does it in a much different way than we’ve seen in the books..he’s teasing..and now the audience sees a more confident Ron...he admits yeah she’s right I had confund him..but he doesnt care..because he knows himself now..and hes an adult and he has children with the love of his life, Hermione Granger 

"So that's little Scorpius," said Ron under his breath. "Make sure you beat him at every test, Rosie. Thank God you inherited your mother's brains."

"Ron, for heaven's sake," said Hermione, half stern, half amused. "Don't try to turn them against each other before they've even started school!" "You're right," said Ron, but unable to help himself, he added, "Don't get too friendly with him, though, Rosie. Granddad Weasley would never forgive you if you married a pureblood."- Epilogue, U.S. 756

Adorable. We get an extended version of the Ron that complimented Hermione in deathly Hallows...and it just shows that they now have a very healthy relationship 

In conclusion, there is serious growth that happens in the both of the, ...and their development is one of the best relationship developments I have ever read... we are reading about teenagers here...how many 14 year old relationships do you take seriously? I think them getting together at the last book was perfect...and their characters are so obviously made well for eachother.. Thanks for reading!

[yourpaceangel]

in which crowley likes cats and aziraphale doesn’t

[Read on AO3]

“Um, Crowley? Could you come here a moment, dear?”

“Coming, angel,” Crowley popped into the back room, mug of hot cocoa for Aziraphale in one hand and mug of tea for himself in the other. “What seems to be the, oh.”

Aziraphale was staring at his chair in the corner of his back room, his comfy reading chair with the distressed leather seat and warm blanket tossed haphazardly across the back. More accurately, he was staring at what was in the chair. That being a small black cat, blessedly asleep and purring absently. Aziraphale turned to stare at Crowley expectantly.

Crowley handed Aziraphale his mug and cleared his throat. “Yes, well, that appears to be a cat.”

“I know what a cat is, Crowley, I was there when they were created. Why is there one in my chair?” Aziraphale gave Crowley a rather stern look.

Crowley scratched at the back of his head, “Ngh, well, you see, um, the thing is- really I mean it’s quite a long story, and-”

“Crowley?”

“It was cold this morning,” Crowley said, “I found her sleeping up under the wheel of the Bentley.”

“So you pulled her out,” Aziraphale said mildly, “and then you brought her here, to my book shop, where I don’t allow pets.”

“She’s not a pet,” Crowley insisted, “she’s just a stray.”

“You checked for an owner, then?”

Crowley said nothing, looking a little guilty.

“Crowley!”

Crowley put his hands up defensively, tea sloshing out over the rim of his mug. “Well I wasn’t just going to leave her there while I went inside to check the lost and found pets Facebook page now was I?”

Aziraphale pinched the bridge of his nose. “My dear-”

“Look I know how you feel about them, but just give me a couple of days to see if she has an owner and if not I’ll turn her over to the humane society, alright?”

Aziraphale gave a long suffering sigh. “Fine, but get it off my chair.”

Crowley put down his tea, mostly forgotten by this point, on Aziraphale’s desk and approached the chair. He made a small noise, crouching down. The cat blinked its eyes open, making an inquisitive ‘mrrp’ noise. “Hello darling,” Aziraphale heard Crowley say very quietly, quite possibly quiet enough he wasn’t meant to hear. The rest of his words were mumbled as he outstretched his hand. The cat stared at Crowley and then at his hand before deciding he wasn’t a threat. Crowley scratched her chin and then bundled her up in his arms. “...good…you…”

“You know,” Crowley said, standing up with the cat cradled to his chest, “Cats are good for catching mice.”

“So are snakes,” Aziraphale said.

Crowley carried the cat out of the room, muttering too low for Aziraphale to hear, but the tone of it was fond.

*

That night in bed, the cat safely tucked away downstairs and away from Aziraphale’s things, Aziraphale let his hand trail fondly up and down Crowley’s spine. “I didn’t even know you liked cats.” He said into Crowley’s temple.

Crowley huffed against his neck, eyelashes fluttering along the sensitive skin. “Clever creatures,” Crowley said, “Smart, independent; not like a dog that needs you to be there for it every minute of the day. They domesticated themselves, you know that? Bloody smart, clever little things. Why don’t you like them?” Crowley poked his bony finger into Aziraphale’s sternum, making him grunt.

“They shed,” Aziraphale said, “and they make a mess. They’re noisy and they tear things up when you don’t pay them enough mind. They’re spiteful. I get enough of that taking care of you.”

“Hey!”

Aziraphale patted Crowley’s shoulder, kissed his temple and the top of his head. “Not that I mind, with you.” He added.

Crowley grumbled, kicking his leg over Aziraphale’s hip and pulling him closer.

Aziraphale rubbed his knuckles over the vertebrae in Crowley’s spine, more there than a regular humans, pressing his palm down flat when he came across a cluster of scales at the base. Crowley dug closer in, like he was trying to press them impossibly closer. It was endearing. Aziraphale smiled into his hairline, trailing kisses over the parts of skin he could reach.

“Angel, let me sleep.”

“I’m not stopping you.” Aziraphale rubbed his thumb over smooth black scales until Crowley shivered.

Crowley pulled his head back, annoyed. “You are, with your,” he made a vague noise.

Aziraphale stilled his hands, “Would you like me to stop?”

“Yes,” Crowley said, then furrowed his eyebrows, “No. I don’t know. Just let me sleep.”

“Alright.” Aziraphale wound his fingers in the hair at the back of Crowley’s head to pull him back down against his neck.

Crowley sighed and slumped against him, fingers digging into Aziraphale’s silk pajama top. He was quiet for long enough Aziraphale thought he’d fallen asleep until he said, “The black ones get adopted less, you know?”

“Hm?”

“The black cats,” Crowley mumbled, “People don’t want them. Think they’re bad luck. She might stay in a cage, angel, if I give her up.”

Aziraphale groaned, clutching Crowley closer. “Not this,” Aziraphale clucked his tongue, irritated, “we’re not keeping it. Go to sleep.”

“Angel-”

“My love,” Aziraphale’s hand slipped down to Crowley’s bare hip, “sleep. We’ll talk about it later.”

“Fine,” Crowley mumbled, and finally drifted off to sleep.

*

Crowley breezed into the shop about midday, scarf tucked around his face and jacket zipped all the way up. He shoved his gloves into his pockets with a viciousness they didn’t deserve before unwinding the scarf. “Bloody winter ,” He spat.

“Any luck?” Aziraphale asked, taking his scarf to hang up in the back room.

Outside, the streets of London were covered in a fine bit of sleet. The view from Aziraphale’s shop window was a dismal gray, the sidewalk outside a dirty brown. The ice was barely enough to keep customers from invading his shop, though now with Crowley back Aziraphale decided to close early and flipped the sign to closed.

Crowley locked the door for him, unzipping his jacket enough to pull the damned cat out from against his chest.

The pink collar about its neck was not an encouraging sign.

“She’s not chipped,” Crowley said, putting the cat down on the ground and scratching behind its ear, “and no one around Mayfair is missing a black cat. Best guess is that she’s a stray.”

“Hmm,” Aziraphale eyed the cat winding around Crowley’s feet. “Best take her to the humane society then.”

Crowley’s face fell, “Angel-”

“No,” Aziraphale shook his head, “Crowley, no. You said you’d take it to the humane society if you couldn’t find an owner.”

“You’ll barely even notice she’s around, angel,” Crowley said as the cat hopped up on a bookshelf.

Aziraphale eyed the creature with barely contained disdain. “I sincerely doubt that, my dear.”

“Aziraphale,” Crowley wrapped his arms around Aziraphale’s waist, pulling them snug together.

“You’re not going to sweet talk your way out of this one,” Aziraphale said, “I’ve made my mind up.”

Crowley pressed a firm kiss to Aziraphale’s neck and then trailed up to his jaw, tracing the skin with his tongue. “Aziraphale,” He said again, softly, squeezing the angel’s waist, “angel.”

“Crowley.” Aziraphale said in warning.

Crowley hummed, nuzzling Aziraphale’s neck with his nose, pulling up to kiss his cheek, then the corner of his mouth.

Aziraphale, stubborn to a fault but ever unable to deny Crowley anything, softened. He sighed, slumping into Crowley’s hold. “You’ve already named it, haven’t you?”

“Yes,” Crowley murmured, “her name is Salem.”

Aziraphale wrinkled his nose in disgust. “It’s not sleeping in the bed.” He said.

Crowley tilted his head back and laughed.

*

Crowley was asleep on the couch, as he ever was when Aziraphale had inventory to do. Aziraphale sat as he desk, papers spread out ahead of him, glasses perched on the edge of his nose as a cup of tea went cold beside him. He cross referenced two of his sheets and heard the jingle of a collar. He looked up to see the cat dart into the room. Aziraphale narrowed his eyes as the creature hopped up onto Crowley’s sleeping stomach, turning to watch him with its bright eyes.

“Right then,” He said, “you stay there.”

The room was warm, courtesy of a little space heater Crowley had brought over from his flat. It was unseasonably cold for early winter so Crowley didn’t go anywhere without a jumper and his space heater. Aziraphale shrugged out of his jacket and went to hang it up on the coat rack. He turned back around and the cat had taken up residence in his chair.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale said.

“Wazza?” Crowley turned his head, blinking sleepy eyes in confusion at Aziraphale.

“Your cat,” Aziraphale said, pointing at his chair.

“S’za cat, angel,” Crowley mumbled, closing his eyes, “just move her.”

“Crowley,” Aziraphale said again. They both politely pretended it wasn’t a whine.

Crowley sighed and swung himself up off the couch. He stared down at the cat in Aziraphale’s desk chair, making eye contact with the little beast. After a beat, he said, “Get down.”

The cat started purring.

Crowley pointed his finger at it. “Down, now.”

The cat batted at his finger, purring louder.

Crowley turned around and shrugged at Aziraphale. “Nothing I can do, angel,” He kissed Aziraphale’s cheek on his way out of the room, “I’m going upstairs to sleep in the bed. Feed Salem before you come up.”

“I-”

Crowley was up the stairs before Aziraphale could raise a complaint. Aziraphale turned back to the cat, holding it’s gaze. “Right then,” He said, gathering up his papers to do in the kitchen.

*

“I said,” Aziraphale mumbled against Crowley’s chest, “the cat doesn’t sleep in the bed.”

Crowley chuckled into Aziraphale’s hair. The cat was pressed up against Crowley’s other side, blessedly asleep and purring loudly. Crowley ran his hand over Aziraphale’s shoulders and back soothingly. “It was cold downstairs, angel.”

“The two of you test me.”

“You like her.” Crowley teased, “you like me.”

“Sometimes I wonder why.”

Crowley pinched Aziraphale’s side, making him yelp. The cat picked its head up in annoyance, hissing at them. Crowley made a shushing noise. “Don’t get sassy.” He pulled Aziraphale closer, mumbling exasperatedly,  “Teenagers.”

Aziraphale huffed out a breath, amused.

The cat settled back down, a black void amongst their white bedding. Crowley settled a hand in her fur, rubbing absently. Crowley was almost asleep, pliant underneath him. Aziraphale pressed a wet kiss to the center of his chest.

“I guess she can stay,” He said, “but just for tonight.”

“Of course angel,” Crowley mumbled, and Aziraphale could feel his lips press to the top of his head, “just for tonight.”

*

“Shut up.”

Crowley tried to hide his grin, hanging up his coat. “Why, whatever do you mean?” He asked.

Aziraphale gave him a dirty look. He was sat in his favorite chair, book in hand, cat in his lap. “Not a word, Crowley, I mean it.”

Crowley huffed out something that might have been a laugh and crossed the room to sit on the arm of Aziraphale’s chair. “I’d sit in your lap,” he said, “but that seat seems rather occupied at the moment.”

Aziraphale grabbed Crowley by the back of his neck to kiss him, biting at his lips and making him groan. When Aziraphale pulled away Crowley looked down at him a little dazed. “She’s warm.” Aziraphale said, in way of explanation.

Crowley hummed, nosing at Aziraphale’s curls, reaching down to pet a hand down Salem’s back. “You like her,” Crowley said, voice full of honeyed warmth.

“We have an understanding.” Aziraphale corrected, tilting his head up.

Crowley brushed their lips together. “An arrangement of sorts?”

“Oh do shut up.”

[justjessame]

If Only Someone Looked At Me Like They Look At Guns 1

When I bought the secondhand bookstore in South Boston, my dad thought I'd lost my mind. What was I, a native West Virginian, going to do all alone in Boston? Sell books, I'd thought. And live my life, finally, I added.

I had spent a healthy portion of my life being the perfect daughter. The one who gave and gave and made sure that I did everything in my power to make my parents proud. I gave everything to everyone, until there was little left for myself. Now, at thirty years old, I could finally have something for myself.

Besides which, have you ever seen Boston? It's gorgeous and colorful. However, when my dad helped me move into the apartment I'd leased within walking distance to my new, old store "As the Page Turns" he wasn't impressed.

"Really, Tessa?" He asked, looking around. "You're going to be homesick. This place is too noisy, it's too dirty. You're going to miss good ol' West Virginia."

Dirty and noisy? Coal mines, I thought, and the plants that made it smell or shot smoke up into the air weren't the same? Instead of arguing, I diverted him with the manual labor of the move. "You going to help me with this bed, Dad? Or should I ask a neighbor?" That got him moving.

It didn't cure his nagging. Not before he headed home, nor after he'd arrived. It made the weekly phone calls a bit of a hassle. I wanted to talk about how I was making my store a success. He wanted to bring up the things I'd left behind. I wanted to discuss the changes I made as the money started to come in earnest. He wanted to listen for a sign of homesickness. Not a call passed without at least one, "You ready to come home yet?"

Two years, I thought, walking to work in the early morning sun. I was smiling. I loved my life. I was busy. I made the store a reasonable success, adding a coffee bar and pastries to the space. And I had regulars and new customers almost daily. Success was sweet, I thought, as I unlocked the beveled glass front door and listened to the comforting jingle of the bell.

The phone rang almost as soon as I dropped my bag behind the counter. Since I wouldn't be opening for another half an hour, I had a pretty good guess of who was calling.

"Morning, Dad!" I answered, taking the cordless phone with me to start up the coffee and espresso machines. I wondered if his call would be over by the time my daily pastry delivery came. "What's up?"

"Tessa, you shouldn't answer the business phone like that." He admonished. Great start, Dad, I thought. "Why don't you have your cell phone on?"

Ugh, I thought, the chastisement with a side of criticism. Lucky me.

"My Blackberry is in my pocket. I must not have heard the call come in." I answered. "Sorry, Dad." Tessa, I thought, stop fucking apologizing, you're an adult. "How are you? Is something wrong?"

I heard him sigh. "Yes, in Boston."

"What?" I asked, wandering the store to make sure I'd put everything in order when I'd closed the evening before. The counters were clean, the leftover pastries went to the soup kitchen nearby, and the shelves were stocked and orderly.

"Don't you read or watch the news?" Irritation was so heavy on his voice that I could feel the glare across states. Why couldn't my parents have had another child so I could share this guilt and misery? "Those vigilante murderers are back in Boston. I think you should come home."

I rolled my eyes. "Dad, I do watch the news. It's just been busy. This past week's been insane." I rolled my shoulders, feeling the tension build. "And why would I care about vigilantes? Didn't they kill mob people? I sell used books and coffee." Logic, I thought, would hopefully work. "Why would I be in danger?"

"Tessa, they killed a priest." He groaned. "Why wouldn't you listen to me before running away to Boston?"

Running away? I was thirty years old when I relocated, for fuck's sake. "Dad, I'm not Catholic, nor are you." I reminded him gently. "I'm certainly not a priest." I let out a sigh I hadn't noticed I was holding. "I'm fine. I'm happy." The stress moved from my shoulders to my neck belying my words. "I'll be safe. Besides, I highly doubt they've returned. And even if they had, they couldn't be stupid enough to come back to their old stomping grounds."

Another sigh and groan from his end. "You never used to be this stubborn." Yeah, because I was too busy making sure everyone else was happy. "Didn't you tell me the bar they used to frequent was close to your store?"

Damn it. Why had he remembered that tidbit in all that I'd told him about my store? Why couldn't he recall how excited I'd been at finding the rare book one of my customers had asked for? And why had I thought sharing the 'local colorful history' of my new home with my overbearing dad? In my defense, I didn't know that someone would kill a priest.

A tap came to the front door and I nearly cheered at the interruption. "Dad, I have to go, my pastries are here." Rushing through another round of I'll be safe and ending with round of "I love yous".

I let out another sigh and ran to unlock the door. The jingle of the bell calmed me a bit as Marco, the bakery's delivery guy came in with the first load of boxes. As I rolled my shoulders and tried to crack my own neck to release the tension, Marco left for the second and last load. After checking to make sure everything was accounted for, I offered him his usual tip. A double espresso.

"Ah, that hits the spot, Tess." He smiled. "You ok?"

I assured him I was fine and we chatted about this and that.

"Better hit the road. Don't want the boss to get pissed." He said, tossing the small cup in the trash. "See ya tomorrow." I waved him out.

"Could you flip my sign?" I asked, and he smiled and did it. "Later, Marc."

I moved to fill the pastry case. Using the decorative towers and plates that I'd picked up at one of the Farmer's Market stalls. The jingle of the bell made me raise up and offer my usual greeting. "Welcome to As the Page Turns, can I help you?"

He was taller than me, but then again almost everyone was. His incredibly blue eyes crinkled with a smile as he took me in behind the counter. The pastry boxes were almost all empty and the display was filled. I was wearing a pair of skinny jeans, a loose v-neck brown t-shirt, and a pair of canvas sneakers. My auburn hair piled loosely into a bun on the top of my head and my ever present and much needed glasses perched on my nose, not thick enough to hide my green eyes.

Since he was clearly inventorying my assets as it were, I decided to do the same for him. Dark hair, looking like he'd used shears to cut it in the dark, crowned his head. His skin was sun kissed but not tan, and he wore a peacoat, black t-shirt, jeans, and boots. I could see a bit of a tattoo peeking from the collar of his coat on the left side of his neck. Another tattoo was on his right hand, along his index finger. A word, "AÈQUITAS". Huh, Latin. Justice? I felt a tingle of curiosity.

His smile turned to a smirk and I waited, raising an eyebrow under my glasses. I had my usual customer service smile on, but felt a little smirk of my own forming. Both confirming our inspection of the other, and finding it agreeable. He finally spoke.

"'Eard dis wus de place fer a master coffee on dis street." His Irish brogue is full and strong.

"Did you now?" I asked, my smile widening. "Whose singing my praises?"

"Doc." Ah, I thought. The sweet, if a bit different, owner of Mcginty's Bar, the place my dad had brought up in his call.

"What can I get you?" I asked, grinning at the thought of how many day drinkers Doc sent my way to sober up. This man, however, looked like he had recently woken up. Perhaps,he had a late night, if the slight red in the white of his eyes were telling the tale properly.

"Two av the largest black coffee yer 'av. Strong." He answered. A late night then, I smiled.

"Shot of espresso sounds in order." His eyebrows raised. "Don't look alarmed, I'll add it to the regular coffee." I turned to the machine behind me and started the two cups. "How is Doc?" I asked over the noise and my shoulder.

"'E's gran. Jammers, oi tink." Jammers, I thought, trying to make sense of the words he used. Traffic jams came to mind so I translated that Doc was busy. I had plenty of Irish immigrant customers, and I was slowly learning some of their vernacular. It was rough going, but interesting.

Capping the two large cups with black lids and sliding them into the brown sleeves that would protect my customers from burning themselves on the heat pouring from the hot coffee inside, I turned. "Well, tell him I'll try to stop over this afternoon with his favorite treat." I handed him the coffee. "Are you new in town?"

He shot me a strange look, but seeing me waiting behind the till, he gave another grin. "Aye, just visitin' for business." He chuckled at his own joke. "Ye new? Yisser accent is different."

I had heard that a great deal when I moved here. "Yep, I'm from West Virginia." My smile stayed in place. He's an odd duck, I thought, but Doc never sent me anyone dangerous or violent, so I felt safe. "Hope you enjoy your visit." I told him his total and he handed me a large bill. Opening the register to give him his change he waved me off.

"Naw, lassy, that's for yer." His smile was sweet, but the tip was twice as much as his coffees cost. I opened my mouth to protest, but he stopped me again. "Naw, oi ill in my brown 'ear it. Doc acts loik de sun shines from yer side av de street an' oi can tell why. Yer take care av 'imself, an' we take care av ours."

"Doc's a sweetheart. He reminds me of my late grandpa." I answered, smiling at the jist of what he said. "It's no hardship to check in on him." I put the extra cash under the drawer. If this strange man came back, his coffee was paid for. "I'm Tessa, by the way." I held out my hand.

"Murphy." He answered, simply, taking my hand. His hands were calloused and rough. Like the men I was raised around and the ones working in the factories here.

"Nice to meet you, Murphy." I said, my smile genuine.

The bells on the door jingled again. Another strong Irish voice called out before I could give my standard greeting. "So that's wha yer were- keepin' company wi' a juicy lassy instead av bringin' de coffee, yer arse."

I looked up and the usual greeting caught in my throat. Dear Lord, I thought, the dim light of the store allowing the beams of early morning sun to settle around the newcomer like a halo. Sun bleached brown hair, cut as haphazardly as Murphy's, light blue eyes, and scruff on the planes of his tanned face. Clearing my throat and my mind of how beautiful he was, I finally found my voice.

"Welcome to As the Page Turns." Jesus, why did I sound squeaky and breathless at the same time? "Guess one of these is yours?" I gestured at the two cups on my counter.

He turned his full attention to me and my mouth went dry as I watched him take the same inventory of me as Murphy had. Only this time I felt inadequate. I fought the urge to squirm.

"Damn it, Conner, stop starin' at 'er loike she's bill skinner. She looks loike a colt ready ter bolt." Murphy's voice broke the weird hold. 'Bill skinner'? I wondered. The horse bit I completely understood.

I cleared my throat again. "So, Connor, is it?" I asked, holding out the same hand that Murphy had shaken. "Visiting for business as well?"

Connor, the archangel of beauty choked on his own tongue as he took my hand and shot a look at Murphy. They were silent for a beat, my hand locked in the calloused heat of Connor's while they stared at each other. Great, pretty, but another weirdo.

"Aye, business." He answered, a smile and chuckle as he returned to face me. "An' yer are?"

I really wished I knew the joke. That had these two laughing every time I mentioned business.

"'Er name is Tessa. Whaich yer wud 'av known if ye'd gotten oyt av scratcher and cum wi' me, loike oi tried ter git yer ter." Murphy answered, smirking.

Connor released my hand and I leaned my hip against the counter. "Are you business partners?" I asked, wondering what type of business they could be in. Rough hands, sun kissed skin, peacoats, hair that looked like a blind barber and blunt shears created the cut weren't usually what I'd associate with business travel. They could be sailors, I supposed.

Connor and Murphy laughed. Each picking up a cup of coffee. Murphy with his right hand, Connor with his left. "Business partners?" Connor smiled, taking an appreciative sip. "Naw, brothers."

Murphy sipped his own. Closing his eyes and sighing in gratitude. "Twins in fact." He added, opening his eyes.

Connor took another drink from his cup. He moaned indecently and it made my stomach clench. "Dis coffee is rapid. Yer 'av a gift. An' I'm jealous yer git ter enjoy it al' de time."

It was my turn to laugh. "Oh, I don't drink coffee." The look of horrified disbelief on both their faces was priceless. "I make it. I love the scent of it, but drink it?" I shuddered. "No thanks."

Murphy's eyebrows rose. "'Oy can yer make it if yer allerge it?"

Connor chipped in, shaking his cup. "An' make it taste loike dis?"

I noticed the ink on his hand as he shook the cup. Another word tattoo. "VERITAS" I reached into my tiny bit of high school Latin. "Truth," I said out loud, startling all of us. I blushed as their eyes fell to mine. I swallowed. "The truth is- my parents love coffee. When my mom died, I learned to make a decent cup so my dad could wake up to it. Worked as a barista for a bit. Still hate the taste."

Connor's eyes burned into me, making me curious again about the two of them. "Konnor, perestan' pyalit'sya, ty yeye pugayesh'." Murphy broke the silence in a murmur. The language sounded almost guttural. Russian? Strange.

Connor's eyes never left me as he answered. "Notò la mia mano, Murphy. Pensi che chiamerà la polizia?" The language he'd chosen sounded more lyrical. Wait, 'polizia'? Police?

I cleared my throat. "Well, this has been- interesting." I smiled, hoping to defuse whatever tension was between the three of us. "Could you please let Doc know I'll be over around lunch?" I asked, needing time to process. Hoping desperately they'd take the hint.

Murphy spoke again, tugging his twin away from the counter. "Naw problem, lassy. We'll be 'appy ter let 'imself nu. Say take 'er 'andy, Connor."

"Clap yer lay-ra, lass." Connor said, allowing his brother to steer him out the door, Murphy shooting me a wave.

Well, then, I thought. Going back to the pastry display, I started clearing the empty boxes. What the hell was all that?

Russian translation from Murphy: Connor, stop staring. You scare her.

Italian translation from Connor: She noticed my hand, Murphy. Do you think she'll call the police?

[theawkwardterrier]

things left behind and the things that are ahead, ch. 39

AO3 link here

He’s gotten pretty settled in with his coworkers at Stark Industries a month into the job, and it’s absolutely stunningly hot, like the air’s drenched, woolen, nearly physical as it fills every little space, but Bucky finds himself going out for lunch. That happens to him sometimes, the need to not be around people, forced to make conversation, to joke and be fine. Because sometimes, still, he isn’t fine; he came home with a weight on his shoulders that can be lighter certain days and heavier others but which is always there, and he’s trying, still, to be okay with that.

He usually eats on the later side, so the afternoon concert is already nearing its close though the music is still apparent from the spot he’s chosen. The file he’s brought with him is only a prop. He keeps it open on the bench beside him but doesn’t really look at it, staring around instead as he unwraps the sandwich he bought.

He’ll try to remember to call Steve tonight, because his best friend made him promise to phone when he feels like this, but he already feels a little guilty about it. He knows that Steve’s got his back, the same way he’ll always have Steve’s, but the Carters are working on adopting their little girl next month - Rose is her name, Steve said - and he can tell that the two of them are stretched pretty thin so he doesn’t want to add on. He has an appointment with his shrink next week, and he could probably make it sooner if he needed it, but this feels like the sort of thing he should be able to handle by himself.

Despite the time that’s passed - six years since Steve and Peggy brought him back, more than ten since whatever happened down in that lab - he hasn’t quite grown used to the ways in which he came home different. If anything, he’s reached a point of annoyance with himself that he’s had all this time and all this help, and nevertheless can find himself overcome by something as simple as a crowd, a noisy room. He remembers by now being the life of the party, ready with a quick remark, lighting girls’ cigarettes with a flick of his wrist and a flash of a grin. He remembers following Steve’s good-hearted, hairbrained schemes throughout their childhood, coming up with schemes of his own, talking their way out of trouble with teachers or the cops on the beat (even if he had to rest his whole weight on Steve’s toes to keep his big mouth closed). But that doesn’t feel like him anymore, and it grates on him that he can’t figure out how to make it be.

He shakes his head at himself, picking a couple of fallen scraps of roast beef from the sandwich wrappings before balling up the wax paper. If he still feels like this at the end of the day, he has the number that Charlie Gibbs gave him before he left Washington, the one answered by a man Charlie describes as “someone who saw a thing or two over there” and who can gather more like them to drink a beer and talk things over if they need to.

In the meantime, there’s still fifteen minutes before he has to get back to the office, and he tips his face upward, limbs sprawling out a little in relaxation as he soaks in the sun. It always makes him feel sort of stupid to have these sorts of moments, the overwhelming of his mind, during the summer, as if the sunshine and freedom should drive them away. But the warmth feels so good, too, that he tries not to think about that, tries to just lean back and enjoy.

When he brings his chin down again, his gaze catches on the bench across the plaza from his. The woman there - one hand holding open a book, the other her own sandwich, a thumb that he can’t quite track wiping away a drip of mustard from the corner of her mouth - is familiar. He stares awkwardly for a moment, trying to place her. She glances up as she tries to flip a page with a thumb (he assumes her clean one) and gives a slight raise of her sandwich in his direction in recognition.

He can picture, like a photograph, the smile he might have given her before the war, cocky, glinting sideways and a bit suggestive. Now he settles for a nod and a tip of his hat, tucks his hands in his pockets and starts walking back.

It’s only as he pushes through the glass doors into the Stark Industries building that he remembers where he’s seen her before: lab coat and safety glasses on, silky dark hair (longer than was truly fashionable) pinned back, in one of the labs during his tour of the building. “The chem fellas, for what they’re worth,” said the guy showing him around, swaggering onward with barely a glance. But Bucky had looked back, caught a glimpse of a raised middle finger.

He sort of wants to ask her whether it was for the “fellas” when she was clearly standing right there, or if she just feels that strongly about chemistry.

She’s there again the next day, sitting on the same bench, holding a different book, Frances Parkinson Keyes’s The Royal Box. He’s actually read this one at Peggy’s recommendation, but he doesn’t say anything, just touches the brim of his hat when he stands. She’s wearing a hat today too, a wide tan straw thing that shades her face, and she touches her brim back at him.

He finds himself grinning as he stuff his hands into his pockets and starts heading back.

He’s actually feeling better on the third day after a night out with Charlie Gibbs’s friends (well, they might even be his friends at this point) and an invitation from Becca to come over to her place for dinner Saturday. He’d wondered when he moved back if being around his family, especially the new generation and their energy, might be too much. But it’s actually invigorating to be around them, to be used as a climbing structure, given random hugs and sticky kisses to his cheeks. He never laughs as hard as he does when Jimmy tells some story about the indignations of his school day or Baby falls unconsciously into an impression of her grandmother. And the youngest is nearly four months now, and Becca swears he smiles all the time, so that’ll be nice to see.

So there’s no real reason he strolls out into the July heat instead of staying in his office, no reason his feet lead him once again to Bryant Park. No reason he stops for only a second, then keeps walking over when he sees a familiar figure sitting not on her regular bench, which is empty across the path, but instead on his.

“I thought that if we were going to keep meeting like this, we should at least know each other’s names,” she says, squinting up past him as he stands over her. Her voice is even, confident, but not strictly businesslike; there’s a smile at the edge of her words. She extends her hand to him. “Layla Mansour.”

He shakes, sits down beside her. “Bucky Barnes.”

“Really?” she says, so dubiously that he actually laughs.

“It’s the name I’ve got.”

“I seriously doubt it,” she says, “but there’ll be time for me to figure out the truth later.” And with that she unwraps her sandwich and takes a bite.

Three weeks later, Peggy requests that Howard send over a chemical engineer and a mechanical engineer to SHIELD headquarters at Camp Lehigh. Bucky’s an easy pick for the mechie considering they won’t even have to go through any extra security rigamarole, and when he hears they’re looking for someone else, he knows right away who to recommend.

Bucky’s never learned to drive, never had to and at some point decided he never really wanted to, so he’s particularly impressed by the ease with which Layla directs the borrowed Stark Industries sedan. She brought gloves with her, a crisp pair, white with bleach, but they’re draped over her handbag in the backseat. Her fingers on the wheel are not long, but they’re easily capable, with short, even nails.

“Where are you from?” he asks like clearing his throat, because he has the feeling that staring at her hands is not an entirely normal thing to do, and because he realizes that he actually doesn’t know. They’ve been talking over lunch for weeks now, but it’s been about preferred sandwich spots and the best things on the menu there, about work, and about her endless books. (She brings a new one nearly every day, and he has no idea how she’s able to read them all. Her library card gets more of a workout than anyone else’s he knows.)

Her mouth tucks in at the corners for just a second, then she says, too brightly even for her, “My grandparents were from Syria. Well, I suppose it would probably be Lebanon now, though, what with the borders shifting and all. And at the time that whole area the Ottoman Empire, but...Now you have the general idea of it, I imagine.”

“Oh,” he says. “No.” Not that he hasn’t noticed her dark, dark hair and intense eyes, but… “I meant, not too many people learn to drive in the city. And um—” He glances out the window, taps a finger on his knee, tries not to mumble. “You have a little bit of an accent. Only sometimes. You drop your r’s, and you’re the only person I’ve ever heard pronounce the number four the way that you do.”

A laugh startles out of her. “I’m from just outside of Boston. Watertown.”

“Don’t know it,” he says, shrugging, turning over in his head the way she says it: Watatown, Watuhtown. “The only thing I know about Boston is the Red Sox.”

Again, he’s impressed as she manages to execute a smooth turn off the main street even while eyeing him sharply. “Be careful what you say. I might live in New York now, but I’ve been going to games at Fenway since I was a kid.”

Bucky lifts his hands in defense. “Hey, they might not be here anymore, but I’m still for the Dodgers. We can hate on the Yanks together.”

“Excellent,” she says, with a grin. “That’s all I ever need,” and she pulls up to the guardhouse at the edge of the base.

He’d expected to be directed to whichever scientist they’d be working with, but Peggy’s actually there to greet them herself.

“We’re honored,” Bucky says, leaning to kiss her cheek.

“You had better be,” she responds. “Good to see you, Barnes.”

“You too, Carter.” He hasn’t seen them in probably a month and the reason why is written in the exhausted lines of her face. It strikes Bucky as a little odd that he hasn’t gotten to meet his friends’ child yet, doesn’t even know what she looks like, but it’s easy to tell how overwhelmed all the Carters are - perhaps the newest one most of all - so it just hasn’t been the right time. They hadn’t even made it into the city for Bucky’s mother’s Labor Day dinner, and Bucky knows how Steve feels about Labor Day and Winifred Barnes. That same exhaustion from Peggy’s face is obvious in Steve’s voice when they talk on the phone these days, catching up late at night when Steve has a minute between cleaning up whatever messes Rose had made during the day. Bucky hadn’t thought Steve could get tired like that since the serum, but apparently kids really do a number on you, or maybe it’s just Rose.

As evidence, when Peggy turns to introduce herself to Layla, Bucky spots a small patch of oatmeal dried onto the shoulder of her blouse. It’s just a little thing, the cream of it blending into her shirt anyway, but it’s large on Peggy Carter; he doesn’t know that he’s ever found her so disheveled, and he’s seen her in the middle of battle and during the frigid center of the winter and after days without a real bath. He’ll point it out to her later - hopefully she’ll have enough brainpower to care.

Still, when she puts out a hand and says, “Peggy Carter,” it’s with that familiar firmness.

“Dr. Layla Mansour.” He can see that Peggy appreciates that she doesn’t shy away from using the title she’s earned, or from shaking back with an equally firm hand. “What can we help with?”

Bucky likes that, himself. Still, when Steve calls that night and waits a whole five minutes before asking casually about Bucky’s new friend that Peggy told him about, Bucky pretends not to know what he’s talking about.

“We just eat lunch together sometimes,” he deflects, and decides he’ll overlook the way Steve’s “hmmm” sounds knowing and just a bit suggestive.

And they do eat lunch together, two or three times a week, sometimes more. As the autumn grows cooler, glancing quickly around before they bring up their favorite and least favorite colleagues, the projects that they’re working on, what they’re most excited about starting next. Inside the newly opened diner down the street during the winter, talking about what brought them to the careers they have now, finding out that Layla went to CCNY too but only for her PhD and a couple years ahead of Bucky - they never came across each other there.

(“Lucky thing we met each other now,” she says around the bite of chocolate cake she is pretending she hasn’t just stolen from him. He smiles, sideways and then more, and echoes, “Lucky thing.”)

They continue into the spring, eating as they walk beside each other in the blossoming warmth, trading stories about how things were for them growing up, about their families, about how home doesn’t feel quite the same when you come back all grown up. Hearing her talk about Ted Williams and Jackie Jensen, her hands flying as if she might snag a baseball out of the air at any moment while he grins at her side, he actually has to hold himself back from gaining some affection for the Red Sox.

(Once, in May, he asks her about her weekend plans and she says briefly that her mother's set her up with a date, the son of a friend of a friend, before turning to toss her bread crust to a couple of squirrels. He doesn't ask more, or mention that the few times his own mother has urged him to go out with nice girls from church or the daughters of her sewing circle friends, he's walked away thinking that somehow they were perfectly nice and normal and somehow not quite right. The next week, she tells him, a bit pointedly, that she's going to see 12 Angry Men over the weekend with some of the other girls from her rooming house.)

He brings her to Steve and Peggy’s for dinner in July. Though he’d seen her not even two weeks ago, at the barbecue that was allegedly for Independence Day (Steve was meant to have a different birthday now), Rosie drags him into the house as soon as they arrive, then squints at Layla, coming through the door behind him.

“Who is that?” she asks, not quietly. “Who are you?”

“We told you that Miss Layla would be coming,” Steve says, striding over, drying his hands on a towel. “Be polite, Rose.”

“It’s lovely to meet you, Rose.” Layla steps forward, puts out a hand, doesn’t waver as she is eyed suspiciously and for a nearly uncomfortably long time. Finally, Rose shakes briefly before darting back off into the dining room.

Steve sighs. “Sorry about that,” he says. “I’m certainly happy to finally meet you.” His polite smile turns somewhat more broader and more youthful, teasing, as he catches Bucky’s glare that means don’t say something like—

“Bucky talks about you all the time,” Steve finishes angelically.

Layla looks over her shoulder at Bucky. “All the time, hmm, James?”

Her hair, normally worn back, is down around her face for dinner, set and curled up at the bottom. Bucky shrugs. “Maybe once or twice. He can’t count very well.”

“Perhaps you should move this conversation toward the table,” Peggy calls. “I think Rose is about to dig into this delicious meal herself, and I might join her.”

Steve and Bucky, mannered as they are, both gesture Layla ahead of them. Once she’s passed, Bucky punches Steve in the shoulder, hard enough that it might even bruise.

All the time? he mouths. Jackass.

Steve tucks his hand in his pockets, raising an eyebrow and mouthing back James?, grinning as they walk in together.

They don’t leave until nearly eleven, after they’ve eaten Steve’s delicious dinner (seriously, when did Steve learn to cook? Bucky can remember when he could practically only boil water, though that might have been because there was barely more in the house than that) and the absurdly rich chocolate mousse tart he made for dessert, after Rose had tucked herself into the chair in the living room where she could still listen to them and fallen asleep, after Steve’s told half a dozen stories to embarrass Bucky and Bucky had given just as good back and Peggy had topped them both.

Layla’s laugh is even lower than her speaking voice, Bucky’s noticed. He can recognize the start of it now, when it’s still a barely audible chuckle, and it makes him smile.

It’s a good night. He’s feeling good, even as he shifts the muscles of his back and shoulder a little. The arm isn’t as heavy as most, and it supports itself pretty well, has control nearly the way a flesh and blood one would, doesn’t just hang from his sleeve as a placeholder - Howard actually started a medical technology division after he worked with it. Still, when he wears it for this long, the discomfort becomes more and more obvious in the later hours.

“You can take it off, if you’d like,” says Layla.

He hadn’t even realized she’d noticed that little movement. Honestly, he hadn’t even realized she’d noticed the arm at all, which is stupid - she’s got two perfectly good eyes, she sees him nearly every day, but she’s never stared or asked prying questions or even looked purposefully away, making unwavering eye contact the way some people do to avoid seeming rude.

There had been that first day they were working at Lehigh, when one of the others on the team was walking across the lab to show them a delicate instrument, holding it carefully and eyeing Bucky’s hand where it was visible past his shirt cuff. “You sure you can handle this?” he’d said, like Bucky was going to thank him for his concern, before he’d crashed to the ground right as he passed where Layla was standing. Even Bucky’s eyes hadn’t tracked her foot flicking out across the floor, just catching the very end of the movement as she set it innocently back where it had been. “Goodness,” she’d said, tilting her head in pity. “Are you certain that you can handle it?” But that’s the only acknowledgement that she’s ever given.

“I’m fine,” he tells her now. “It’s fine.”

She makes a low hmmm sort of sound. “Maybe,” she says. “But it’s also fine to sometimes not be fine.”

“Not for me, it isn’t,” he says, the words out before he can check them. He’s been doing pretty well in the months that he’s known her, talking to Steve and Peggy and the shrink and guys who served, spending time with his family, getting good sleep when he can and taking long walks in the night air when, however increasingly rarely, the nightmares mean he can’t. He doesn’t take time off from work if he can help it, and he’s mostly been able to help it. But he knows that his healing is a slow process, inches and years, that he has to do his best to keep a good face through it all.

He doesn’t know how to explain that to her, really, to tell her that the version of him that she’s spending time with...it hasn’t been a show, but it hasn’t been all of him, either.

“All of us,” she says with conviction, as if she can read his mind, as if she already knows, as if he’s already told her everything and she doesn’t care. “All people are allowed to not be fine sometimes. And you count in that too, whatever you might think of yourself.”

And as she drives them back, soft darkness and the sounds of crickets around them, he tries to let himself believe her.

She gets promoted late in October, which she’s proud of but also finds irritating - it means a lot of extra paperwork and administrative duties. They don’t get to eat lunch together as often now that she has a heavier schedule of meetings. He takes to staying a couple hours later, turning up by her desk around 7 to make sure that she wraps up for the day. They usually go out to supper together after, sometimes even a picture if there’s something good playing.

One frigid night in February, Bucky holds Layla’s coat out for her, trying to douse his nerves by listening to her complain grouchily once again about how the new position means that she’s down to reading a book every two days or even every three.

“The librarians probably have you in their prayers,” says Bucky once again as they wave to their favorite waitress and head toward the door. Before Layla can push it open, Bucky puts a hand to her arm.

“Wait,” he says. “I just wanted to—Well, it’s Valentine’s and you’ve been working hard so I—Here.” He pulls from his coat pocket the little pink case, watches her pop it open to examine the pink rose inside nestled amidst baby’s breath and a sprig of greenery. She’s practical, doesn’t really go for elaborate things, but he’s seen the little flashes of prettiness in the glint of jeweled pins and flowered clips when she has her hair pulled back or up, the various necklaces he’s only caught glimpses of, hidden as they are beneath the necklines of her dresses and blouses. He thought she would like this, and he doesn’t tuck his head but instead watches as she smiles, removes the flower and takes in the scent, runs a gentle finger over the petals.

“Thank you,” she says, tucking it back inside and closing the little case with care. “It’s lovely.”

“I’m glad,” he says, letting out a quiet little breath. He’d searched around during his lunch hour for something remaining at the florist in good shape and kept it in one of the cool rooms at work, waiting for the right chance to give it to her. Feeling lighter, he reaches for the door, only to have her stop him this time, a hand on his forearm.

“Are you ever,” she says, “going to ask me on an actual date?”

“Oh.” For all the nights he lay with his hands behind his head and imagined saying those words, he finds that he can’t manage them now, not right away. He almost wants to look away, to gather his head, but he breathes deeply, watches the calm in her brown eyes, the patience there.

“Tomorrow’s Saturday,” he finally says. “Fair Game’s at the Longacre; we can see if there are tickets. Or West Side Story, if you’d rather. Or The Music Man - that’s supposed to be good too, if they’re not sold out.”

“Marian the Librarian?” He can hear that sound, the very beginning of her laughter. “I’ll see if I’m available.”

“You will, huh?”

“I think I can probably make the time,” she says archly. “For you.” And she holds out a hand to him, waiting as he secures his fingers gently between hers, before opening the door.

More chapters here

[msftbts]

Personal stylist!Reader x OT7

(eventual) smut, fluff, slight angst & a bit of comedy here and there

Summary: You travel to Korea to start your new life as a personal stylist, expecting nothing more than to gain some job experience for the future, but seven sulky men make it difficult for you to stay in your lane and follow the rules. Will you stay faithful to your boss, or fall into the charms of another?

Notes: This chapter was so much fun to write, I love bringing out the personalities of the boys. Also I know y’all are anticipating when the smutty stuff is gonna happen, but...just wait

Warnings: mild cursing, mentions of alcoholism

Taglist: @milk-mochi @ephemeral-mindset @the-wild-ego @kwitze-blog @in-overrmyhead @itsapparent @chocoflagcutii @leftflowerprunedonut @wildly-lost-lantern @knadiuniverse @treetops68 @ultrawheeze

Don't be shy to message/question/request me if you want to be added to the taglist to get notified whenever I post a new chapter! I update this au at least once a week.

 I’m also taking requests for other writing ideas & if you want to discuss or ask questions about the plot of this story then feel free to! I’d love to hear your opinions and theories of any possible plot twists. And yes, I’d love to become friends with all of my readers !! 

(masterlist)

Chapter 3

You tried to brush off all your dirty thoughts and took Jungkook’s first outfit off the rack. It was time for you to get professional, there was no time for anticipating or being shy. You were done doubting yourself. “Okay let’s change you into these pants first”, you said turning away from him to take the pants off the hanger, whilst he dropped his pants down. When you heard the belt of his pants colliding with the floor you turned to hand him the pants, trying your best to maintain eye contact. And, well, to not look down. You got him dressed quicker than you expected. He was looking at himself in the mirror, looking pleased as he was turning around to see how the outfit fitted him. You went closer to make sure all the buttons of his shirt were tightly closed and straightened any crumbled fabric. “Those pants look slightly loose, do you think they’ll stay up on their own like that?” you asked him. He looked down at his pants, not really knowing what to answer. “You’re the professional one here, you tell me”, he said smirking to you. “You’re right, that needs a belt just in case” you said and went over the table to pick a matching belt. “Yeah, I don’t wanna pull a Jin out there”, Jungkook laughed. “Pull a Jin?”, you asked. “Yeah, Jin’s pants have fallen down on stage once and bro, that was the funniest thing ever!” Jungkook cackled and slapped his hands together. “Poor Jin! Y’all must be giving him a hard time for it, if you have even gone as far as naming a saying after it”, you tried to hold back your laughter, but couldn’t help but join him. Maybe you had been too quick to judge idols before, since you started noticing how well along you got with Jungkook, and how down to earth he was in front of you. Besides his outstanding looks, he was just like any other ordinary young adult, or atleast the extremely kind and funny type. He had a personality that made you feel like you had known him forever, because he was so chill with you. Maybe Melissa was right, maybe you would become friends with some of the idols. Again, not those type of friends who would hang out and do things together, but work friends. Friends who work together, but aren’t afraid to joke around and make it fun. You found yourself hoping for it.

Once you finally got done styling Jungkook and he had left the room, it wasn’t long until another tall man walked through the door. “Hi, my name is Namjoon, nice to meet you!” he introduced himself, with the most genuine smile you had ever seen. You were surprised by his good manners, and could sense the inner leader in him. You had been told earlier in your first meeting that Namjoon was the leader of the group. You introduced yourself back, and got started with the styling. It was noticeably more quiet, than it was with Jungkook, but you didn’t mind working in peace. Namjoon had an effect on the atmosphere, that didn’t make the silence any awkward, it was surprisingly comfortable, taking  in the fact that you didn’t really even know each other. You couldn’t help but admire his full chest, while helping him button up his shirt. You did it sneakingly, though. Or at least that's what you thought, because when you felt soft breathing on the back of your neck, you looked up, only to find out Namjoon had noticed your staring and was now giving you a big smile with his dimples out. Your eyes got wide and your mouth slightly dropped: “Sorry! I didn’t mean to stare!”. “No, you can stare, it’s fine”, he reassured. It’s fine? You thought to yourself. Either this man liked being stared at, or he didn’t want to make you feel embarrassed, you needed to get your shit together. You were about to finish buttoning up his last buttons, when he suddenly grabbed your hands. “Should I leave a few buttons open then?”, he asked stopping you from closing the buttons. “I mean, sure if you want to”, you said nodding, trying to hide the fact that his touch slightly startled you and made you blush. “No, I’m asking your opinion here. You were the one staring at my chest, so does it mean you like it?”, he raised an eyebrow at you. “I-” you stopped, not knowing what to say, “Yeah it’s nice when it’s out there”. You had to get your courage up to finish that sentence, because you knew you were his stylist, and you needed to give your opinion when asked, or at least that’s what you told yourself to try to keep the encounter as professional as possible. You dropped your hands from his shirt and he fixed the collar, so his tan chest would peek through. He had a pleased look on his face.

You were quick to find out that Yoongi wasn’t the most talkative type, when the first thing he said when he wandered into the room was: “Save the small talk, I’m saving energy for the concert”. You couldn’t help but smile at that, when the smaller framed man lazily fell onto the chair. “We’re good, but I’m gonna need you to put these on for me”, you said and handed him his clothes. He got dressed quickly, and you picked up his casual clothes off the floor and put them away. While you were busy folding his clothes into a box, Yoongi had walked over to the table and started sniffing all the different bottles of cologne you had laid out. “Do you have anything else than these generic husky scents? All these do is work on me like an insect repellent, I wanna stay away from anyone who smells like this”, he complained putting down the last bottle. You scoffed at his statement. “So you wanna stay away from Namjoon and Jungkook? The previous boys practically lathered themselves with those”, you snickered at him. “Exactly my point”, he said without moving his lazy expression. “Hmm, well those were all the fragrances given to me”, you looked around trying to find a solution for his satisfaction. You went through your bag, but the only scent in there was your cheap floral Victoria’s Secret. You pulled it out to inspect it more, but Yoongi took it off your hand and sprayed a little bit of it in the air. “Mmm, now this is what I’m talking about”, he said and spritzed it all over him. You were surprised that such a cold man was weak for some flowery girly ooze, but it was cute. He marched out of the room, with a cloud of Victoria’s secret following him. “I think I made him happy” you thought to yourself.

After the quiet client Yoongi had left the room, you were faced with a loud crowd of three when Jin, Hoseok and Taehyung all barged into your room at once. You just stood there when they sat down on the to sofa in the corner of the room. “Um, who am I styling?” you tried to ask, but with no effect. None of them heard your quiet voice, when they were too busy laughing at each others jokes and playing games on their phones. You walked over to them, and took the phone out of Taehyung’s hand. “Hey-”, Tae let out as they all stopped into their places. “I asked, who am I styling here?”, you repeated, but clearly it was their first time hearing it, judging by the confused looks. “Jin will go first”, Hoseok said. Jin slapped him on the arm. “No! Hoseok is going first!” he yelled in defense. You rolled your eyes as the boys started bickering playfully together. “You can style me first”, Taehyung stood up from the sofa and smiled at you. “Thank yo-” you were about to say when he continued: “If I’ll get my phone back after that”. Hoseok and Jin had settled down to watch the situation from afar and started loudly laughing at Taehyung’s statement. You crossed your arms and pouted, while trying to think of a comeback. “Come on, cut her some slack, she’s just trying to do her job here. Let’s not get on her nerves on her first day”, Tae said turning back to look at Hobi and Jin and then gave you his most angelic smile. You knew damn well he did this only to get on your good side, so he’d get his phone back soon, but you accepted it, since it seemed to have an effect on the other boys. While you were dressing each one of them up, the others were being noisy in the background or making stupid comments to try to make the one you were dressing up embarrassed in front of you. Even though you were sure to give them annoyed looks, you knew that deep inside you were having fun with them, and you lowkey enjoyed the attention you were receiving.

While being busy looking after these three kids, you had forgotten about your biggest worry of the night. It, well he, was quick to remind you of it, when he stormed into the room. “Get out fools, it’s my turn with her”, Jimin stated out loud. “Doesn’t that sound kind of objectifying, Jimin?”, Hoseok said. “I’m talking about my turn to get styled by her, keep your dirty thoughts to yourself”, he snapped back and turned to smile slyly at you. You froze, not knowing what to do or what to say. You were hoping that at least one of the members would stay in the room with you and Jimin, because you were forced to face your much dreaded fear. To your disappointment, they all left at the same time, the decibels dropping painfully low with the atmosphere in the room. Once the door closed, Jimin stared at you curiously. There it was, the same damn stare that made you weak in the knees before. He knew too well what he was doing to you, and he enjoyed the power he had over you. “Are you going to undress me now?” he asked. You choked. “Excuse me, what?” “Yeah, are you going to undress me so you can style me?”, he said licking his lips teasingly. “Look, I think you got it wrong. I’m not the one who undresses you, I’m the one who gets you dressed up. Don’t get too excited now”, you gave him a saucy look. He just laughed at that, clearly being fueled by your reaction. You walked to the clothing racks. “Take your pants off”, you commanded. “Oh, going straight to the point, huh? Don’t you think it takes some foreplay before this part?”, he said with a strong sarcastic tone. You didn’t even bother to respond to that, and just threw his suit pants at him, which caused him to scoff and give you an offended look. “Woah there dancer!”, he laughed. “Dancer?” You questioned. “Don’t you remember how you busted out those moves at the gym the other day? I’d invite you to be a part of the danceline, if Hobi wasn’t so strict”. You felt your face heat up once again, and a mixed emotion of anger and embarrassment boiling in your gut. “You weren’t supposed to see that”, you said with a defeated low voice. “Yeah I figured when you ran away from there. Could you teach me some of your moves some day?” He teased and imitated your body rolls. You pushed the shirt off your hands on him and accidentally formed a little smile, when you noticed the comical face he was pulling. “See, I knew you liked me”, he smiled while putting on the shirt you shoved to him. “No I don’t Jimin”, you said. “I thought there was something in the way you looked at me since the first time you saw me”, he said and your face started heating up. Did he really feel it too? You really had contemplated if there was something in the way he looked at you from the first time you saw him, just like he said, but has he thought so too? “Oh, and then there’s the blushing. You seem to be doing that alot around me too”, he said as he quirked his head to the side to look at your reddened face that you tried to hide. You hated how right he was. Were you really that invisible? Your pride didn’t let you give out to him, and you quickly collected yourself. “Put this on”, you said and gave him a tie, trying to distract both, him and yourself from the ongoing topic. “Could you help me?”, he asked with a voice little bit too sweet. “What, you don’t know how to put on a tie?” You responded. He looked down at the tie on his hands thinking what he could say next. You were sure that this was just another way of his trying to get you closer to him, but his response took you by surprise. “No, I’ve never been taught how to. My dad was an alcoholic, and he was never around to teach me the manly deeds, so no, I really don’t know how to”, he looked deep into your eyes. You felt the guilt creeping up on you, and swallowed before answering. “I’m sorry, I didn’t know..but I’m here to teach you, I’m your stylist after all”, you said standing closer to him. “Thank you”, he responded and it felt like he finally put his guard down. You reached to his neck to put the tie around it and slowly started to instruct him how to tie it. He looked down at you, swifting between looking at your hands and your face as you were busy explaining. He wasn’t really even listening to you, but enjoyed seeing you being so passionate about something. “..and then you pull it and it should be in place, like this. Did you get it?” You finished teaching him. He didn’t respond and you looked up to him: “Jimin?”. You were faced with his calm eyes on yours. He was looking down at you like he was really happy that you were there. For once, you actually felt comfortable looking back to his eyes, not feeling like you were his target anymore. Sure, you felt almost vulnerable under him, but you could see in his eyes that he meant no harm to you. He slowly took his hands and cupped your face in them. You knew where this was going, but you wanted it too. He shifted his eyes to your lips, and you closed your eyes. Just as you were letting go of your professionalism, a knock on the door forced you to gather it up again. You quickly pulled away from him, and went to open the door. “Hi, oh my god I have to tell you everything! You can not believe what happened between Namjoon and me-, oh, you have a client here!” Melissa fussed. Jimin smiled at her. “No, we were just done here. Jimin, you can go now”, you hinted at him. He looked at you in defeat, but left the room. “Did I interrupt something?” Melissa asked. “What? No! Why would I be doing something with Jimin? It’s my first day of work, Bighit was very clear about-” “I was kidding”, Melissa brushed it off. “Oh”, you sighed.    

Chapter 4 

[tournesolia]

Chaos Lineage Yuma Chapter 10 Translation

Place : Scarlet mansion – Living room and dining room

Yui : (Everyone gathered in the dining room because it's time for supper, but...)

Reiji : …

Shu : …

Yuma : …

Yui : (No one says anything...)

Kino : Aah-aah, that atmosphere sucks...

Reiji : Kino, be quiet and eat

Kino : Okaaay

Yui : (The atmosphere completely changed now. It got tense... The silence is heavy)

(It must be because Yuma-kun and Reiji-san are holding grudge against each other...)

Yuma : … Thanks for the meal. Hey, if you finished eating as well, let's go back

Yui : Ah, okay...

Reiji : Wait, Yuma

Yuma : … What ?

Reiji : Please don't go near the dungeon. If you don't want us to doubt you, refrain from acting as you please

Yuma : Oh, shut up... You didn't have to bother reminding me, I already know !

*Yuma leaves

Yui : W-Wait, Yuma-kun !

*Yui runs after him

Reiji : …

Scene change : Scarlet mansion – Corridor

Yuma : Damn, that Reiji guy... ! He's noisy and persistent !

Yui : Reiji-san is being cautious, so... He's maybe trying to get you to comply with his rules

He has a strong memory about the supreme ruler implanted in him, right ? He's feeling upset because of that...

Yuma : … A memory, huh. You're right

Reiji did nothing wrong. It's that bastard who made us like that

Sorry for getting irritated. Even if I know, getting sermoned makes me mad

Yui : (W... Well, they originally didn't get along...)

(Still, I hope we can at least do something about the atmosphere)

Scene change : Scarlet mansion – Kitchen

Yui : It seems no one is using the kitchen... That's good

(I came here while Yuma-kun's sleeping. Will he get angry when he wakes up ?)

(But I still want to make something for him to enjoy)

Hmm... There's ham, cucumber and jam. How about making a sandwich ?

??? : What are you doing here ?

Yui : Kyaaa... !?

Yui : Reiji-san...

Reiji : It seems Yuma is not with you. Did he went alone in the dungeon to see those rats ?

Yui : T-That's wrong. He doesn't have the intention of doing that

Reiji : He doesn't... I see. You seem to have a strong attachment to him

Yui : Well...

(I can't say that it's because we're lovers. He won't believe me and he will suspect us even more)

Reiji : Don't deny it. It's all right to be honest... or that's what I would like to say

The one who is worthy to own the lady known as Eve is me

Yui : … Reiji-san, please. Don't stand in my way...

(He's blocking the way out. I can't get out of here...!)

Reiji : So you aren't going to obey me to the very end

It doesn't matter at all. You only have to give your blood to me as a proof of your subordination

Because if I take possession of Eve, the supreme ruler's throne will be mine

Yui : Why do you want to become the supreme ruler so bad... ?

Reiji : What a foolish question. As the eldest son of the Scarlets, it is necessary for me to take the throne

Yui : Necessary... ?

(I guessed it right. Reiji-san only follows what his implanted memories dictates him...)

(He only thinks that he has to fulfill his duty as the eldest son. But--)

(Being at the mercy of those fake memories and hurt everyone... This is not what Reiji-san himself wished for !)

Reiji : I overlooked it until now, but...

I am the one worthy of Eve's blood, not Yuma

Yui : That's wrong... You are only being manipulated by fake memories right now !

Having to reach the peak even if it means taking lives... You are only following that obsession

This is not your true intentions !

Reiji : Silence

Yui : … !

Reiji : If you won't obey me, I will have to discipline you. Now, behave yourself

Yui : (… ! He's going to suck my blood !?)

No... Reiji-san, stop...

Yuma-kun... !

Yuma : Stop !!

*Yuma pushes Reiji away

Reiji : … !

Yui : Ah...

(Yuma-kun... He came...)

Yuma : You bastard... What were you doing to her !?

Reiji : It's obvious, isn't it ? I was teaching her once again who should reign above all

Yuma : Teach her ? Was it necessary to use your fangs for that ?

Sucking her blood won't make you the supreme ruler ! Are you stupid for rushing too much !?

Reiji : I beg you pardon ?

Yuma : That's true, no ? You tried to suck her blood indecently

Where are your usual manners !?

Reiji : I don't want to hear this from you who lust insatiably for blood

Yuma : What did you just say !?

Yui : Now now, you two... !

Reiji : … You are like a guard dog. You spoiled my enjoyment

Pardon me for the intrusion. We shall talk some time later

*Reiji leaves

Yui : Reiji-san...

Yuma : Hah, piss off !

Yui : (Reiji-san... He's impatient to fulfill his duty as the eldest son)

(Which means becoming the supreme leader...)

Yuma : … Hey

Yui : Ah... Yuma-kun, thank you

Yuma : You... Stop acting on your own !

You aren't safe even inside that mansion ! Those Scarlets are targeting you !

So don't separate from me and wander around !

Yui : O-Okay... I'm sorry

(I wanted to cheer him up but I made him excessively worried...)

Yuma : Geez... What the heck were you doing here ?

Shouldn't we stop giving food to the prisoners for now ?

Yui : Indeed, I wasn't going to do that today. I thought about preparing something for you...

Yuma : Ha ? For me... ?

Yui : We're in such a situation recently, so I thought that if you eat something delicious, you would feel better

But if I stand in the kitchen, it would be natural for Reiji-san and the others to find it suspicious. I guess I made a mistake... I'm sorry

Yuma : No, I mean... You made me worry. It was bad for me to shout at you...

Aaah... Then, I'll keep watch so make me something. It's more safe if we're together

Yui : Eh... ? Ah, okay

(Yuma-kun isn't angry anymore ?)

(But he's staring at me so I'm a little nervous...)

Choice 1 : Focus on cooking (black roses)

Yui : (For now, let's focus on cooking. Spreading butter on bread...)

(… Ugh, I'm worried about his gaze after all. I-I'm nervous)

Yuma : … Hey, you're limp. Are you okay ?

Yui : I-I'm okay !

Choice 2 : Talk when cooking (white roses)

Yui : I'll immediately prepare something for you so wait a little, okay ?

Ah ! Should I use some of the vegetables we harvested ?

Yuma : Should I check ? That's a good choice. Is that a sandwitch ?

Yui : Yes. It's a ham and jam sandwitch. You like it, right ?

Yuma : Yeah

– End of choices

Yui : (When he stares at me making something, I'm somewhat embarrassed...)

(It wasn't like that when we cooked together, and yet...)

Yuma : What ? Are you silent because you're nervous ?

Yui : Eeeeh !? That's not it ?

Yuma : Haha... Your overturned voice isn't convincing

*Yuma gets closer

Yuma : Anyway, I came out to fix your bedhair. You got some stray hair sticking out

Yui : Eh ? It tickles a little... !

Yuma : Ah ? I just touched your head. You're so sensitive. Well, I already knew that

Yui : (He won't stop at all ! And it really tickles a little...!)

Then I won't make you a sandwich

Yuma : Don't make such noises for me... *kiss

Yui : Hyaaa !?

Geez, Yuma-kun, are you playing with me !?

*Yuma hugs her

Yui : Eh... ?

What's wrong ? You suddenly hug me...

Yuma : Nothing... I feel greatly at peace like that

Kou immediately came when he smelt something from the kitchen, joined by Azusa

And Ruki watched the scene with a wry smile... I was just thinking about that kind of thing

Yui : Yuma-kun...

Yuma : … I think again about when I confronted Ruki. And when I threw Kou and Azusa in jail...

How can I smile about those peaceful times I spent with my brothers when I actually threw them into jail ?

Yui : … Don't say that

Even I remember. I miss our daily lives so much...

That's why we shouldn't lose. We can't give up until everyone regain their memories

Yuma : You... You're saying what you have to say as usual. But... you're right

We'll absolutely get back to our daily lives. Even if someone gets in our way...

Yui : Indeed...

(Reiji-san and Ruki-kun will surely get in our way...)

Yuma : Hey, turn this way

Yui : … Okay

Yuma : I'll make sure to bring us back to our daily lives. I promise... *kisses her

Yui : (It's as if he transmitted his feelings to me from the lips...)

Yuma : Haa... It's not good. Your scent is getting stronger. I can't hold back

You haven't enough with just a kiss, huh ?

Yui : T-That's because... I'm happy... when you do that...

Yuma : Damn, you talk me into it. Hey, expose your shoulder. I'll suck from here

Yui : O-Okay...

Yuma : You're terribly honest, aren't you ? Well, we both can't endure it. *sucks blood

Yui : Yuma-ku... Ah...

Yuma : *sucks blood

Yui : (His bloodsucking... is gentle but more intense than usual..)

(Could it be... Yuma-kun shares the same feelings as me... ?)

A gap had been created between

the Scarlet brothers.

And it's as if there was an invisible

wall between Yuma-kun and

Ruki-kun... his real brother.

In this situation, where no one else

regained their memories, it was as if

we didn't have any allies aside from

each other.

I just felt that the pain given by

Yuma-kun's fangs dispelled my

overflowing anxiety.

Scene change : Scarlet mansion – Living room and dining room

Shu : … Zzz... Zzz...

Kino : He's sleeping agaaain. Shu ! Come on, wake up !

Shu : Hmm... You're noisy...

What do you want... ? I was sleeping comfortably...

Kino : You can sleep soundly despite the situation where the supreme ruler may be decided very soon, huh

Shu : It has nothing to do with me

Kino : You're unmotivated as usual. Ending up only sleeping... What a blessed life you have

Shu : If you have something to tell me, hurry up and do it

Kino : My my, don't be hasty. I have not much to say. I just think you're kind

You took Yuma's defense against Reiji, right ?

Shu : … I didn't mean that

Kino : Is that so ? Doesn't it feel like you always care about him ? Well, either way's fine

However, I can say that Yuma will betray your feelings

Shu : What do you mean ?

Kino : Actually, I heard something interesting from the prisoners. Let me share it with you, especially--

Chapter 10 : End

[eldritchsurveys]

381.

What shows are you into? >> The shows that I’m watching right now are The Strain, Hannibal (rewatch), The X-Files (rewatch), and I have M.A.S.H. as my current “mealtime entertainment” show. I think I’ve given up on Grey’s Anatomy, at least for the time being, because I’ve gotten more than a little weary of the romance stuff. (You can kind of see where my mind is at right now considering what I am currently watching, lmao... not to mention I was previously watching Mindhunter and The Act...) Also, Derek Shepherd just died and I really don’t feel like wading through a bunch of grief-related subplots. What’s your claim to fame? >> I have no idea. Are you usually early or late? >> I’m more likely to be too early than too late. How often do you people watch? >> As often as I’m in a place where people-watching is actually entertaining. What do you hope never changes? >> I don’t think I have any business hoping for anything to stay exactly the same forever.

What’s your dream car? >> --- What songs have you completely memorized? >> I have so many songs memorised. What job would you be terrible at? >> What job wouldn’t I be terrible at in some way... What skill would you like to master? >> There aren’t any I’m really into the idea of mastering right now. What are you absolutely determined to do? >> Continue to be truer to myself and the kind of life I want to live. What would you rate 10 / 10? >> I don’t know. Where would you rather be from? >> ??? What’s your favorite drink? >> Jasmine green tea with honey. What quirks do you have? >> Oh, who knows. How often do you play sports? >> I don’t. What website do you visit most often? >> tumblr, most likely. What movie title best describes your life? >> I can’t even begin to imagine what movie title would come close to describing my life. Or any life. What age do you want to live to? >> It’s not quantity of life that I’m into so much as quality of life. Of course I’d like to live through middle age and see what it’d be like to be proper old, but if that comes with a slew of health conditions and infirmities then I’m not too sure about that. But-- who knows, actually. Maybe I’ll still carry on rather well even with all of that. Maybe when it comes down to it, it wouldn’t be as bad as I think. All in all, I don’t think that it’s rational for me to try and predict how I’d feel about being a certain age or living to a certain age, and there’s no real point in thinking about it either. I’ll live until I die, and that’s that. What takes up too much of your time? >> I don’t think anything takes up too much of my time. What do you wish you knew more about? >> It’s more that I wish I had the drive to focus on specific things long enough to become an expert in them. But I have the mind of a dilettante, not a specialist. How different was your life one year ago? >> Not very. What’s the best single day on the calendar? >> I have no idea. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn? >> Self-punishment, defense mechanisms, certain thought patterns and behaviours that I adopted as a homeless person in a metropolis, that sort of thing. What’s your favorite genre of book or movie? >> I don’t have a specific one. I do seem to gravitate towards psychological thrillers and space epics when it comes to movies, though. What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home? >> --- What TV channel doesn’t exist but really should? >> We really don’t need more TV channels. Where is the most interesting place you’ve been? >> I have no idea. There’s something interesting about almost everywhere I’ve been. What fad or trend do you hope comes back? >> --- What’s the best way to start the day? >> I like to start mine with some fun music. What kind of art do you enjoy most? >> I’m not sure. What would your perfect room look like? >> A little bigger than this one, and maybe with a bigger window...? I don’t believe in a “perfect” anything, I’m just happy to have a room of my own that is comfortable and clean. What fictional place would you most like to go? >> I have no idea. What have you only recently formed an opinion about? >> I don’t know. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen? >> *shrug* What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way? >> I’m not sure. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting? >> Hang-gliding. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished? >> I think a lot of people’s accomplishments are impressive to some degree, because life can be hard, but there’s nothing that really sticks out to me. How do you relax after a hard day of work? >> --- What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch? >> Just anything I’m not interested in, I guess.  Where would you spend all your time if you could? >> I wouldn’t want to spend all my time in one place. That’s the quickest way to dissatisfaction for me. What would be your ideal way to spend the weekend? >> I don’t have an ideal way. Most weekends are fine. What’s the best way a person can spend their time? >> --- What would be the most amazing adventure to go on? >> I don’t know. There are way too many superlative questions in this survey. What pets did you have while you were growing up? >> I had dogs. What job do you think you’d be really good at? >> I’m not sure. I think I would make a good bartender skill-wise, but bars are noisy and hectic and not altogether tidy places, so that’d be a problem. I think that’s the thing with jobs, for me -- it’s not necessarily the job itself that I would be awful at dealing with, but the environment and social elements. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen? >> I couldn’t say. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been? >> *sigh*... What are you most likely to become famous for? >> I don’t want to be famous for anything. What’s worth spending more on to get the best? >> Anything you end up using at least weekly, unless it’s meant to be replaced often. What age do you wish you could permanently be? >> No thanks. What is special about the place you grew up? >> I don’t know what’s special about it. What do you consider to be your best find? >> --- When was the last time you climbed a tree? >> I have never really climbed a tree. What city would you most like to live in? >> I actually don’t know at this time. It’ll probably be a couple of years at least before I start doing any real research on that possibility. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you? >> I couldn’t say. I have had a lot of lucky things happen to me. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week? >> Er. What’s your favorite piece of clothing you own / owned? >> I don’t know. What is the most annoying question that people ask you? >> --- What is the most impressive thing you know how to do? >> --- What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read? >> --- What is the most annoying habit that other people have? >> --- What are you looking forward to in the coming months? >> The NOLA trip. I know I’m ‘supposed’ to say “the wedding”, but that’s not really the exciting part for me, that’s the stressful part. Maybe it won’t feel like that when it actually happens, but it does now, so. What are some small things that make your day better? >> --- What one thing do you really want but can’t afford? >> --- What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of? >> --- Why did you decide to do the work you are doing now? >> --- What state or country do you never want to go back to? >> --- What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years? >> I don’t look ahead that far. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in? >> --- If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make? >> ... I’m not interested in woodworking, though, so that’d be a useless thing to grant me. At least grant me a skill I want to use. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see? >> Yesterday I took a shot at a garbage can from about 6 feet away and I made it. It was cool. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue? >> --- If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time? >> --- When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with? >> --- Where do you usually go when you when you have time off? >> --- What question would you most like to know the answer to? >> --- What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives? >> I don’t think everyone should do anything. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to? >> Whatever it is, I’ve forgotten it now. What gets you fired up? >> I don’t know. Not much. What risks are worth taking? >> For me, I have no idea.  What do you take for granted? >> I eventually take everything for granted because I can’t possibly maintain a constant attitude of gratitude 24/7/365.  What do you have doubts about? >> Various ultimately-unimportant things. What fact are you resigned to? >> The fact that I just might not be a passionate person, and while that means I am certainly missing out on things that I can’t feel or experience, there’s no point in fuckin navelgazing about it. There are benefits to my experience, too -- just because they’re not talked about doesn’t mean they don’t exist. What book impacted you the most? >> *shrug* What’s the best thing about you? >> --- What are you addicted to? >> Nothing. When do you feel truly “alive”? >> I always feel alive. How else am I supposed to feel? Who inspires you to be better? >> No one. What makes a good life? >> *shrug* I know my life is good, and that’s all. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have? >> The pay and hours aren’t the thing that needs to change for me to want a job... What irrational fear do you have? >> None. What would be your spirit animal? >> I don’t know. Have you ever saved someone’s life? >> Highly doubtful. What’s the hardest lesson you’ve learned? >> *shrug* What’s something you are self-conscious about? >> I’m very conscious of my general appearance because I’ve been made to be. What is one of your favorite smells? >> I don’t know, uh... ginger? That’s nice. What do you like most about your family? >> --- What is the “holy grail” of your life? >> --- Have you ever given to any charities? >> No. What’s the last adventure you went on? >> Well, we went to the zoo yesterday. That was kind of an adventure. What are three interesting facts about you? >> I can’t be bothered to think of one, let alone three. What was the best compliment you’ve received? >> --- What chance encounter changed your life forever? >> --- What do you want your epitaph to be? >> I don’t really care. It’s not my business anyway, I’ll be dead. What do you want to be remembered for? >> --- What is something you will NEVER do again? >> I can’t say. What are you most likely very wrong about? >> If I know I’m probably very wrong about something, why would I still be thinking it? What stereotype do you completely live up to? >> I don’t know, I never thought about it. What dumb accomplishment are you most proud of? >> If I’m proud of it, how the fuck is it dumb... What was the most memorable gift you’ve received? >> --- What is the biggest lesson you never learned? >> That... makes no sense... What’s the most immature thing that you do? >> There’s probably something, but I can’t think of anything right now. Who is / was your most interesting friend? >> --- What do people think is weird about you? >> I don’t know, man. What chapters would you separate your autobiography into? >> I don’t... know........ What do you hope your last words will be? >> Why would that even matter to me? By that point, my life -- and the entire concept of things “mattering” -- is over. What do you spend the most time thinking about? >> I’m not sure. Various things about characters, labyrinthine discussions that Can Calah and I have throughout the day, stuff like that, I guess. What is something you can never seem to finish? >> I don’t know. What mistake do you keep making again and again? >> I haven’t noticed any lately. What’s the best thing you got from your parents? >> --- What is the strangest thing you have come across? >> --- What would a mirror opposite of yourself be like? >> I can’t possibly have a mirror opposite. That would imply that I’m some kind of stock character who only has a handful of personality traits that do not ever conflict with each other. What’s the best and worst thing about getting older? >> For me, the best thing has been just... learning what not to give a fuck about. I have a markedly low number of fucks to give as it is, and I was always giving them away freely to the wrongest things and people. No wonder I was always stressed out. I don’t think there’s a worst thing. Like, yeah, my body is less tolerant of things like staying up all night and doing drugs, but those are definitely things I don’t need to be doing anymore anyway, so... still a benefit? What would be the scariest monster you could imagine? >> I can’t imagine one. What is something you are certain you’ll never experience? >> Whatever that romantic love thing is that everyone’s always on about. If it hasn’t happened by now, I fail to see what would make the future so drastically different that it’ll suddenly happen then. What challenging thing are you working through these days? >> I don’t know. I’m taking a break from constantly pushing myself to do things “better” or “more normal”, from that whole “self-improvement” grind that puts books on the bestseller list and makes “gurus” out of regular-ass people who are just good at exploiting insecurities, so I’m not really “working through” anything right now. And honestly, I’m finding I have a lot fewer “problems” than I thought I did, and I’m happier with myself than I thought I was. What’s one responsibility you really wish you didn’t have? >> --- What do you wish your brain was better at doing? >> I’m not sure. I complain about my brain, but honestly, it’s doing pretty damn well with the fucked-up toolkit it was given. I’m pretty proud of it, all told. If your childhood had a smell, what would it be? >> I don’t know, I don’t associate any particular smells with childhood. In your group of friends, what role do you play? >> I don’t know, I don’t have an actual group. Which of your scars has the best story behind it? >> None of them really have good stories. What have you created that you are most proud of? >> Various characters and fiction. What were some of the turning points in your life? >> I don’t think I can really say. I’m not sure I believe in “turning points” as is, either. That suggests there are certain moments where Everything Changes and Suddenly I Saw the Light and so on. Whereas, it rarely actually happens like that. Personal change happens behind the scenes, where I can’t witness it, and so slowly that it looks like nothing’s moving at all, until suddenly I look back over several years and go, “hunh. shit is different.” What bends your mind every time you think about it? >> Consciousness. What is something that your friends would consider “so you”? >> Being comically thirsty for villains and various eldritch beings. What’s something horrible that everyone should try at least once? >> --- If you had a personal flag, what would be on it? >> I’d like a personal Flagg, actually. *wheeze* As the only human left on Earth, what would you do? >> I don’t know. I’d require more information -- like what happened to everyone else, for example, and why it didn’t happen to me. What stat for your life would you most like to see? >> Meh. What did you think you would grow out of but haven’t? >> Surveys, definitely, lmao. What are three of the most significant numbers in your life? >> 9, 19, and 8. What’s the best and worst piece of advice you’ve ever received? >> --- What song or artist do you like but rarely admit to liking? >> I will never deny an artist or song I love. What annoys you most about the in-groups you are a part of? >> I don’t even know what in-groups I’m part of. I feel like I’m too contrarian for that. What small gesture from a stranger made a big impact on you? >> --- What are some of your personal “rules” that you never break? >> I don’t think I could have unbreakable rules. I’m more inclined to adaptation than to rigidity. If your life was a book, what would its title be? >> --- Among your friends or family, what are you famous for? >> --- What’s the title of the current chapter of your life? >> --- What do you strongly suspect but have no proof of? >> I can’t think of anything. What do you regret not doing or starting when you were younger? >> Nothing. As you get older, what are you becoming more and more afraid of? >> I don’t think anything like that exists for me. Yet, anyway. In what situation or place would you feel the most out of place in? >> I don’t know. Maybe if you plunked me down right in the middle of the Met Gala or something, lol. What personality trait do you value most and which do you dislike the most? >> Oh, I don’t know. What would you do if you knew you were going to die in one hour? >> I wouldn’t do anything, I guess. What am I possibly going to do in an hour that would make any difference? Maybe I’d just lay down, put on some music, and wait as patiently as I could.  What are some of the events in your life that made you who you are? >> Are there any events in my life that didn’t? If life is a game, like some people say, what are some of the rules? >> I don’t know, ask r/outside There are two types of people in this world. What are the two types? >> I’d put a meme here but I’m too lazy What lifestyle change have you been meaning to make for a while now? >> --- What question can you ask to find out the most about a person? >> How would I know? What can you not get right, no matter how many times you try? >> *shrug* When people look at you, what do you think they see / think? >> I really can’t even imagine. People have assumed or falsely interpreted things about me that have caught me completely off guard, so I guess anything goes. If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? >> I am done changing my name, lmao. (Legally, at least.) What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done that actually turned out pretty well? >> I don’t even know. Most of the dumb things I’ve done have turned out well eventually, seeing as I’m still here and have all my limbs and eyes and such-not.  

[wakandan-flowerz]

Have It Your Way II

A/N: This took me forever and it’s super late and I am sorry. You guys really want this so here it is. Reader is Wakandan...so they’re black. You know the drill. Please read the part one to this if you haven’t already

Part 1

Warnings: Angst and smut! You wanted both well I gave you both! Cursing. And some soft!M’Baku, callbacks to the first imagine so you might want to give that a read before reading this one. 

Summary: After leaving the Jabari and becoming successful in your career, it’s time for you to step down from the job but, what happens when M’Baku seems to take s sudden interest in wanting to be a part of the council.

“Then, let it be done.” T’Challa said signing a paper and passing it to you. “Y/N, I cannot express enough how much help you’ve been in the past year and a half.”

“I’ve only done what you’ve asked to do.” You said storing the paper in a folder and putting it on your desk. Since you left the Jabari, you had been responsible for negotiating with other nations’ ambassadors, getting Wakanda the appropriate recognition, appointing people to represent Wakanda in the U.N. and other world organizations. Today, you just finished a deal with another country in Africa that needed help so you agreed to send supplies and support. Wakanda was now a major country and it was all thanks to you.

Whatever, T’Challa dropped on your desk you handled it. You made being a king easier for him. You achieved what you wanted and more. Way more than you would have achieved while with the Jabari.

“You’ve done more than that. I plan on honoring you at the banquet this Saturday.” T’Challa said. “But, I must ask since things are slowing down what will you do now?”

Matters for Wakanda were slowing down and you weren’t needed as much when you first started. You had plenty of options but, it was the matter of where exactly would you go. “Maybe education.” You said. “I thought about going to be a professor at our university.”

“You know I’ll write you a recommendation letter.” T’Challa said with a smile.

“As if I’ll actually need it.” You chuckled. You stood up, turning to leave. “The gift for the prince should be coming in soon. I was going to tell Nakia but, I haven’t seen her today.”

“Y/N, wait. I need to tell you something.” T’Challa said. You backed away from the door and looked to him. “M’Baku is coming down for a council meeting. It seems he wants to restart an effort of being one as a nation.”

You nodded, nonchalantly. “And what matters do the Jabari apparently need help with.”

T’Challa shrugged. “He is to arrive in the morning for tomorrow’s meeting. We will both see then.”

“I guess we will.” You said leaving his office.

You got back to your apartment in the city. You had your resume to fill out and people to email back. The past year and a half had been so fulfilling for you. You never thought you would find this much success. The only thing you wished for was that you had done this sooner. It was bittersweet that this was coming to a close but, at the same time, going into the education system would give you to the opportunity to inspire others to make the difference you made.

Your Kimoyo beads started to go off. You sighed as you set your bag down. You opened your palm, signaling for the hologram to start. “Yes?” You said to Shuri.

“Did you know about M’Baku, Y/N?” she asked.

“He’s coming tomorrow to sit in on a council meeting.” You said as you moved to the refrigerator to retrieve a water bottle.

“Y/N, he is here.” Shuri said.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“M’Baku has arrived a day early.” She said.

Before now, you would have welcomed your heart fluttering at the sound of his name but, the fact that you got butterflies in your stomach after a year and a half apart baffled you. You took a breath and shook it off. “Well, we’ll have to see him in the morning for the council meeting.”

“Y/N, be honest with me. How are you going to handle this? He is your ex-boyfriend.” Shuri pressed.

“You know you really are a noisy teenager.” You joked.

“Hey, I thought you saw me like a little sister.” Shuri said.

“I do and that’s why I’m going to tell you, like a little sister, to mind your business.” You said.

“Hm, yes. Don’t come venting to me when you want to talk about him.” Shuri said.

“Whatever. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You said ending the call.

You took a deep breath as you went to sit down on your couch. You were sure M’Baku was only going to be here for a day. This would be the first time you’d see him in over a year. You still remembered how he saw you out of the Jabari palace. You still had a little bit of disdain for him with the way he did you. But the question was, did you still love him?

You arrived at the palace at the same time you always did. You went to your office and logged in, making necessary updates and checking your email. You got a knock at your door and sighed, hoping you would get a late start on your duties. “Come in.” you said. The door opened to Shuri who shut the door and rushed up to your desk. “Let me guess. A software update?”

“He was asking about you.” Shuri said propping your head up on her palms as she eyeballed you.

“Who?” you asked, your eyes not breaking from the computer screen.

“Your gorilla.” Shuri said. You flew back in your seat and removed your glasses looking at her. She giggled. “He asked about you at dinner if you were going to be at the meeting today.”

You found yourself at a loss for words. M’Baku, asking about you. Something didn’t sound right. “You’re joking.”

“No. I assure you.” Shuri said lifting her hands up, defensively. You slipped your glasses back on and turned back to the screen. “He asked what time do you usually get here, whether you were married…had children.”

“Now, I know you really are joking.” You scoffed.

“Okay, I am. He only asked if you would be at the meeting. Nothing else.” She said. “What are you going to say to him?”

“He is here for a meeting. If we talk about anything, we’ll talk about business. Nothing more.” You sighed.

“Can you at least tell me if you missed him?” Shuri said.

“I don’t know how to feel.” You admitted taking off your glasses and tossing them on the desk. “It’s been 18 months since I’ve seen this man. How am I supposed to feel? He told me himself that if I left to not worry about him or the Jabari. Since I’ve left they haven’t communicated with us about continuing with the unity idea and the trade deal that I organized failed after four months. So what am I to think?”

“Isn’t it funny that you will be leaving your position with us and all of a sudden Lord M’Baku of the Jabari of the tribe, your former flame, makes his descend from the mountains to attend one of your last council meetings?” Shuri said getting up and making dramatic gestures.

You rolled your eyes. “It’s a coincidence.” You said.

“We’ll see. I’ll see you at the meeting.” She said leaving.

M’Baku sat in the throne room, removed from the other council members. He watched them speak in hushed voices as they gave him quick glances, no doubt he was a topic of conversation. His nervous energy was put into bouncing his leg which made noises as his heel hit the floor.

Queen Mother entered the room, sitting close to the throne. She gave a welcoming smile to everyone and even turned to M’Baku. “It’s good to have you here, M’Baku.” She said. “Are you really think of participating in the council?”

“I have come to think it is long overdue.” He said in a hushed voice.

“Well, allow me to welcome you.” Ramonda said.

“Queen Mother,” the Merchant tribe elder said. “is it true that Y/N will be leaving as T’Challa’s political advisor?”

M’Baku’s head snapped in the direction of the woman. He hadn’t heard any gossip about Y/N since he came to the Golden City. He knew she’d be at this meeting and a part of him was still eager to see her. M’Baku felt torn apart after turning her loose. On one hand, he loved her but, on the other, he was annoyed about her wanting to meddle in political affairs.

“From what my son has told me, she is. Y/N has been of great help to my son but, our troubles with other nations are over so we’ll have to say goodbye to her.” Queen Mother said. “But, she’s expressed her interest in teaching so maybe she won’t go too far from us.”

“She has been a pleasure to have on the council.” The River tribe elder said. M’Baku watched as each of the elders had something positive to say about Y/N and her many accomplishments. For some reason, he felt foolish. He held you back all those years to only hear great things about your doings since he cast you out.

Attention in the room turned to you and Shuri walking in. M’Baku couldn’t focus on anything but, the clicking of your heels and the strut you gave. From the side, he could see you had been eating well by the way you were filling out your dress. The tattoos on your ankles you got from your time with the Jabari complimenting the heels. Your hair in box braids kept behind your back by a rubber band. You had this glow about you which made M’Baku almost even more drawn to you.

You sat down, giving a smile to the elders in the room. Your eyes fell to M’Baku, your heart skipping several beats and your palms getting sweaty. You noticed he was staring at you. His eyes piercing through you as if he was expecting you to say something or come to him. That look was the same he gave you the first time you met. His eyes, beckoning you to come to him. The same look that had you in his arms and bed, every night. However, this look seemed hungrier, more starved. You felt strange as you didn’t feel the power of his gaze anymore. You didn’t feel the need to call out to him or walk over or even acknowledge him. With that, you broke the gaze to look over at Shuri who was holding in a laugh.

“Y/N, we were just told that you would be leaving us.” The Border tribe elder said.

“I am.” You said. “It has been a pleasure and I wish I could do it all over again but, I’m afraid I’ll have to move on.” You looked around the room to the elders that nodded and gave you short Xhosa expressions of thanks and praises. You looked over to M’Baku who was still glaring at you. What did he want? You distracted yourself by looking over to Shuri. She was trying to hold back your snickers at the fact that you and M’Baku kept making eye contact but wouldn’t do say even two words to each other.

Your head spun looking over at the door as T’Challa and Nakia walked in. “My apologies to everyone. Our son fell a bit ill so we had to tend to that.” T’Challa said. He took his seat at the throne with Nakia sitting next to you. “Before we start, allow me to welcome Lord M’Baku. It seems he finally taken our offer to join the council seriously.”

M’Baku chuckled and nodded, finally taking his eyes off of you. “Yes, the Jabari have decided that it’s time to open up with the rest of Wakanda. So to speak.” His eyes fell on you, almost mocking you.

“Allow me to speak for the council when I say we will help with whatever the Jabari needs.” T’Challa said.

“I know there are certain matters we will have to talk over.” M’Baku said.

“You and I will discuss after this.” T’Challa said.

“With your political advisor, yes?” M’Baku said looking over to you. You froze as the eyes in the room adverted to you.

“If she is needed, we will call for her assistance.” T’Challa said looking over to you with slight confusion on his face. “Right now, we have other matters to discuss.” T’Challa looked over to you for you to open the meeting.

“Since Wakanda has come out to the world, we’ve had success in putting other outreach centers in New York, Chicago, England and we will be breaking ground for one in New Orleans. We have signed a deal to reach out to our neighboring countries and provide supplies to villages and we will be building wells for them as well.” You said. “So far, the world now understands that Wakanda is not just an operating country, we can be considered a major power.”

The other council members clapped. “Y/N, none of this would have been possible without you. You’ve done so much, not just for the council but, Wakanda as a whole.” Nakia said.

“We can’t thank you enough.” Queen Ramonda said.

“It was T’Challa who gave me the opportunity.” You said, looking around the room. You noticed that your statement made M’Baku shift uncomfortably. You grinned slightly, knowing that even after all this time, you could get to him. “I just did what needed to be done.” You said, smiling. M’Baku watched with a clenched jaw as you received praises from the council members. He cracked his knuckles and rolled his wrists, uneasy in his seat. He fidgeted as the meeting went on with matters pertaining to Wakanda. He watched you give insight and come up with solutions as if you already had them planned. So this was your full potential. If he gave you freedom, is this what you would have done for the Jabari?

“If there are no other matters, I would like to open the floor to M’Baku to talk about what exactly does he need us to help with.” T’Challa said.

“The Jabari would like to broaden our educational system to start. We want our children to build skills that will not only serve the Jabari but, we are going to integrate with the rest of Wakanda then, we’ve decided that we need to produce productive members for our society.” M’Baku said.

You blinked rapidly. You didn’t want to believe your ears, M’Baku wanting to better the Jabari as a people. M’Baku couldn’t have come up this idea on his own. The idea sounded vaguely familiar to you but, you couldn’t get over how baffled you were over to fact that M’Baku really was at a council meeting asking for help. You remembered him as prideful and stubborn. He barely would let you pull a splinter from his fingertip, so how was he going to ask help building a new education system. He really came down from the mountains to sit in on the meetings that he would send you to because he hated them. Hell must have frozen over.

“Well, we will see what we can do to help.” Nakia said.

“Y/N, you thought about going into education. You definitely could help out on this.” Queen Ramonda said.

“Yes!” Shuri exclaimed, giving you a wide-eyed, knowing look. “It would only be fitting that this would be one of the last things you would help the council with.”

You shot a look over to Shuri with a clenched jaw. You looked over to M’Baku and forced a smile over your lips. “If Lord M’Baku and the Jabari need help, I’ll be of service.”

M’Baku nodded, smirking. Pleased with himself as if he won something. After the meeting, you shook hands with some of the council members. T’Challa tapped your shoulder, causing you to turn around. “Nakia and I have to go see about your son. Would you talk terms with Lord M’Baku until I arrive?” he said.

You sighed and rolled your shoulders back. “Yes.”

“Thank you. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” T’Challa said walking forward with you, distancing the two of you from M’Baku to whisper. “I know this may be uncomfortable for you. However, I know you are more than capable of handling it.”

“Hey, you know me.” You said. T’Challa smiled motioning Nakia along. You turned back to M’Baku who you knew he had been staring at you for a while. “If you follow me to my office, we can get things started.” M’Baku raised his eyebrows and motioned for you to lead the way. You turned and exited the throne room, reminding yourself that he would only be here for a day. You felt M’Baku close behind you as you traveled throughout the palace. Part of you wished he would just speak but, you weren’t sure if you would have responsive to him. You opened the door to your office letting him in.

“So what exactly do you have in mind for the Jabari from an educational standpoint?” you asked going to your desk and sitting down.

“The elders want to see our children have skills that would not only benefit the Jabari but, Wakanda as a whole. The idea is that our children will come down from the mountains and maybe play bigger parts in our nation.” He said. You looked up to him and parted your lips to speak. “I know this was an idea you had once before. I presented it to the elders recently and they couldn’t help but, agree.”

You sat there astonished. “Well, a year and some months really seemed to make a difference.” You said. You sat and thought for a moment. “And one of my ideas, no less.”

“Well, just as you said. Time can, in fact, bring change.” M’Baku said.

“Clearly,” you said, snidely. You looked up and down. You opened your computer and began typing on it. “What happened on the trade deal I organized for the Jabari?”

“We no longer saw fit to provide lumber. Besides, I already gave something up for the advancement of Wakanda.” M’Baku said.

Your eyes shot over to him, squinting. Your fingers left the keyboard as you squared yourself behind the desk, placing your hands in front of you with your fingers intertwined. “Is that what you call it? You gave me up? That’s how you see it? I was an object to give away after I wasn’t willing to be docile and bend to your whim. When my ideas outgrew your simple understanding. When I wanted to do better and grow and you just wanted to be constant.”

M’Baku frowned. “You say that is if it was easy for me.”

“Hell, you made it seem that way.” You said.

“I assure you, it wasn’t.” he said quickly.

“You were the one that told me that gave me the ultimatum. I remember you making that choice for me.” You said turning back to your computer.

M’Baku’s face twisted as you had stuck a knife in him and twisted the blade. “You forced my hand.”

You rolled your eyes. “Fine, say what makes you feel better. Let’s get on with this.” You said. “Let’s get this done as you are only here for a day.”

“A day?” M’Baku questioned. There was a chuckle in his voice. “Who told you that?”

“I assumed…” you started.

“I’m here for the week in fact. T’Challa told me about the celebration and you were being honored so…I extended my stay.” M’Baku said. You felt a chill run down your spine. He was doing this on purpose. You must have given a fearful expression as a laugh came over M’Baku. “As you were saying, we should get back to talking terms.”

“I mean, how can he just stomp his big boulder built ass into my life.” You said pacing back and forth in Shuri’s lab. “I was doing fine. I had achieved all my goals and now all of a sudden here he pops up. This is like one of those horrible cliché American movies. I mean, why now?! That bastard threw me out, saying the Jabari didn’t need to change. All of a sudden, out of the blue, the Jabari wants to change. The Jabari elders agreed to an idea that I presented to them once. My idea! And they want to go through with it because Great Gorilla M’Baku deems it so.”

Shuri looked over at Nakia, smirking. “Oh, so now you believe this isn’t a coincidence.”

“This is bullshit.” You said.

“I thought it was a tad bit suspicious.” Nakia said.

“I mean, what does he want now?” you said plopping down on the stool kicking off your heels.

“To throw you over his big shoulders and take you back up the mountains.” Shuri teased. You hissed in her direction.

“My advice is to just focus on the task at hand. Finish the new agreement with the Jabari, figure out how we can help them with their education system…” Nakia said.

“And retire in peace.” You groaned.

“Y/N, be honest. Just say you still miss him.” Shuri said, reaching out and grasping onto your hands.

“I don’t miss him. He told me not to worry about him and I didn’t. M’Baku didn’t want me for what I was worth.” You said, snatching away from her and picking up one of Shuri’s tools, fiddling with it. “The last actual thing he even told me was that he would arrange my transport here. He had a guard escort me out when I tried talking to him and…”

“And what?” Nakia asked.

“M’Baku gave me a necklace…like his. He just took it off my neck like it was nothing.” You said, your voice growing low and your tone softening.

“Seems like he took more than the necklace.” Nakia said.

You sighed walking back to your office. Since you were coming to the end of your days working as the royal political advisor, you decided pulling late nights wouldn’t be the worst thing. As you drank from the dark, strong liquor, you drew up the terms of the new Jabari agreement the way M’Baku and T’Challa were agreeing upon. As well as reviewing the open position at the university you were looking into. You let out a sigh as you were getting hit with the end. This job was everything to you, you did everything you dreamed of. With the alcohol coursing through you, you reminisced about the U.N. meetings, the dinners with ambassadors of other nations, the times where other officials flirted with you because they thought you were just a pretty face until you slammed them with your knowledge, leaving them speechless. You’d never get this thrill again but, you were glad you got it.

There was a knock on your door. You glanced at the clock and there was no way someone was coming to drop something off on your desk this late. “Come in.” you said.

The door opened to M’Baku and you groaned, tossing your glasses on the desk. “I’m working on the documents now.”

“I’m not here for that.” M’Baku said walking. He wasn’t wearing his fur nor his armguards. It was clear he was getting ready for bed.

“Then what is it that you want?” You said in a harsh tone. The alcohol only heightening your mood, making the annoyance clear in your voice. “Eh? What do you need from me?”

M’Baku sat down in one of the chairs in front your desk. He glared at you and you couldn’t tell what he wanted. “Tell me something.”

“What?” you groaned.

“If you hadn’t taken this job, where would we be?” M’Baku asked.

You scoffed. “I’d be miserable. Stuck trying to get a hard-headed bastard to become greater for his people.”

M’Baku clutched his chest as if you shot an arrow into him. “Was I so cruel?”

“You didn’t respect me.” You said.

“Respect you?” M’Baku asked, taken aback.

“Aye, respect me.” You said leaning forward. “You didn’t respect me. You saw me as a possession. You didn’t value me as an intellectual. I was beyond you. I had ideas and motives that you didn’t want to fathom. I saw the Jabari’s potential and wanted more. You wanted me under your thumb with the rest of the people.”

M’Baku chuckled. “None of those things are true. I loved you.”

“You tossed me aside like yesterday’s garbage.” You growled.

“I regret that.”

You blinked rapidly. You set the glass down wanting to listen to him. Something about your tipsy state made you more malleable to actually hearing what he had to say.

“You want the truth? I regret letting you go.” He said.

“Then why would you do it?” You whimpered. “You told me that our ideas may have been different but…”

“I loved you all the same.” M’Baku interjected with a twisted face.

You shook your head. “You couldn’t possibly.”

“You were far ahead of me, I will admit. I was deaf to your words of change and advice. You were…are smart, intelligent, beautiful, well-rounded, a joy to have. I was foolish.” He said.

“Why are you telling me this?” you said straining. “All this time, why would you come here and…”

“I wanted to tell you I am sorry. And as much as it would have pained me then, I have to say you were right.” M’Baku said. You scoffed shaking your head and downing the entire liquid from the glass and even taking in the ice. “You were everything I was too stubborn to be. I know now that if I gave you the ability the Jabari would have prospered more than ever. You may have not been what some of us wanted but, you were who the Jabari needed. You wanted to elevate the Jabari. You wanted to elevate me. You saw everything we could have been and I wasted you. A regret that I will take to my grave.”

You sniffed, fighting the tears. You didn’t understand why they were coming but, they were itching to come because you didn’t just hear what he was saying. You felt it. This was what he should have told you all that time ago. You didn’t want to hear this anymore. “Get out.”

“No.” M’Baku said. “I’m not done.”

“Yes, you are. You were done with me when you told me that it was you and the Jabari or my dream. You wanted me to choose you and when I didn’t you decided to cut me off altogether. You were so self-observed that you would have rather keep to yourself and have me abandoned everything I came in our relationship with.” You said. “You couldn’t handle me. You weren’t equipped to do it.”

“Y/N.” M’Baku called.

“No! You aren’t going to interrupt me anymore!” You said slamming your hand on the desk. “You couldn’t have loved me or respected me.”

“I did.” He said, raising his voice over you.

“Liar!” you snarled.

M’Baku jumped forward in his seat, planting his feet and his fists resting on his knees. “How can you tell me I lied? Hm? Y/N, I loved you. I loved you more than common understanding! I loved you so much that I…I was frightened. You were advanced in your thinking, yes. You saw what I didn’t and while I know that everything you wanted would have been beneficial for us, I wasn’t ready to change.”

“Now, he admits it.” You said throwing your hands in the air.

“Yes, I admit it! You called me stubborn, prideful and controlling of you and all of that I will own up to.” M’Baku said. “But, while you sit here as if you were the only one hurt in this, I suffered as well.”

Your eyes widened. “M’Baku, how did you suffer?” you asked. “How? Please, enlighten me. Because, stop me if I’m wrong but, it was you who cast me out. I would have stayed if you had actually paid attention and listened to me! But no, you wanted it your way. And it was your way that sent me here. Your way that broke us apart. And I guess I have to thank you. If not for you…I wouldn’t have gotten to achieve my aspirations.”

“You think I didn’t hurt? I was broken from you leaving.” M’Baku said.

“I was broken the moment you took that necklace from me!” You cried.

M’Baku watched you as you let the tears fall. You let a weak sob leave the pit of your chest. You wiped your tears and he was instantly taken back to the last time he saw you. The time you left his office in tears after he almost literally stripped you of his love. “Y/N, I…”

“Get out, M’Baku.” You said trying to regain your composure.

“Please, let me…” he started getting up.

“I need to get through these documents before I leave tonight and I cannot do that with you distracting me.” You said sternly.

Your office door pushed open to one of the Dora Milaje. “Political Advisor Y/N. Is everything okay?”

“Yes. I don’t believe Lord M’Baku is familiar with the palace grounds. It seems he can’t get back to his room. Could you escort Lord M’Baku to his quarters? It’s gotten quite late.” You said.

M’Baku twisted his face at you, astonished. You shrugged your shoulders at him and turned back to your computer, typing away at the keyboard. “Lord M’Baku, if you’d please follow me.” He huffed and jetted out of the room following the warrior, slamming your door closed.

You put a pen on the thick stack of papers in between T’Challa and M’Baku. “Gentleman, if you would please sign and date in the appropriate sections.” You watched T’Challa and M’Baku take turns signing the document. A new treaty between the Kingdom of Wakanda and the Jabari. By the year’s end, the Jabari could be fully integrated with Wakandan society should members of the Jabari choose and those of other tribes were free to migrate to the mountains if they wanted. M’Baku was now a full-fledged member of the council and was even issued a set of Kimoyo beads for communication.

T’Challa stood up with a smile on his face as he shook M’Baku’s hand. “It’s good to finally have this.”

“I must say, I regret not having this before now.” M’Baku said.

“Will you join us for dinner? To celebrate our new alliance.” T’Challa said.

“What kind of house guest would I be if I denied it?” M’Baku said with a chuckled. T’Challa nodded in agreement as they have actually grown a friendship in the past few days.

“Y/N, you have to join us.” T’Challa said. Your head sprung up from putting the papers away.

“Excuse me?” You said.

“You played a very big role in getting this done as you have with other arrangements. Plus, it will the one of the last times we’ll have you at our table.” He said coming around and placing a hand on your shoulder.

You smiled and sighed. “If you insist, my King.” T’Challa smiled at you as he began to walk out of the room.

“M’Baku, walk with me. You’ve yet to see our royal greenhouse. I’m sure you’d love to see what we have growing this season.” T’Challa said.

You looked up to M’Baku, raising your eyebrow mockingly. He glared at you almost squinting. “I’ll be right there.” You scoffed as you exited the room with the papers in hand to process, pushing past him.

You arrived at dinner a tad bit later than everyone else. “There she is.” Shuri said. You didn’t like the grin on her face. You rolled your eyes as you took the seat next to her. Your eyes scanned the room and fell right on M’Baku was sitting right across of you. You realized that you were actually sitting the seat Shuri should have been sitting in. You frowned as you knew she had set you up. Your mouth suddenly went dry. You cleared your throat as you reached for the glass of water on the side of you.

You looked over at Shuri who was snickering. You nudged her under the table, getting her to stop. “Y/N, we have to thank you once again for getting the treaty done.” Nakia said, breaking from her chatter with T’Challa.

“You all can stop thanking me for what I was hired to do.” You said.

“But, really you’ve made things so much easier for T’Challa. We hate to see you go.” Ramonda said.

“All good things must come to an end.” You said shrugging. Staff walked in with food and placed domes in front of everyone. They lifted them to reveal everyone’s dish. M’Baku glanced up at you to see that you, in fact, had the same vegetarian dish he had.

“M’Baku, I hope you don’t mind but, we had the kitchen make Y/N’s favorite dish. We figured you wouldn’t be opposed.” Queen Mother said.

“It’s quite alright.” M’Baku said. A smirk grew across his face as he found himself amused that you were still a vegetarian after all this time. Everyone at the dinner table made small talk and continued on with their meals. You caught M’Baku’s glances at you but, you ignored him. You didn’t want to engage with since the night in your office. You didn’t have the energy to entire him since the night he came inside your office. He’d make comments towards you but, you would never really respond to them. That’s how you both remained. Until the banquet that is.

You stared at yourself in the mirror of your apartment. You had on a fitted bronze dress that hugged your curves. It was a bit tight at the top, pushing your breasts with just the right amount of cleavage. It had two slits that showed off your legs with you walked. Your stilettos were black to compliment the Jabari ankle tattoos and your makeup had you glowing. You rubbed shimmer oil on your exposed shoulders and chest making look like you had bathed in gold. You looked like a work of art. You went to pick up your necklace only for your doorbell to ring. You strutted to the door and answered it to find a Dora.

“Is something wrong?” you said.

“I was told to get this to you urgently.” She said offering you a package.

“Who is it from?” you asked examining it.

“Lord M’Baku of the Jabari tribe, ma’am.” She said. You parted your lips to speak again but, she left. You closed your door and placed the package on your breakfast table. You ripped the wrapping to reveal the wooden box. You moved the latch and opened it. You gasped at the sight of the necklace. Your fingertips grazed it, feeling the grain of the wood platelets. You had a sudden urge to put it on but, instead, you slammed the box shut. Pulling on your heartstrings wasn’t going to get you.

You walked into the banquet with others greeting you as you waltzed past. You stopped and made small talk with a few officials of Wakanda. Shuri had stuck up behind you, joining in on the conversation

“Well, don’t look now.” Shuri said tapping your shoulder. You turned around to see M’Baku walking in with a tuxedo. You nearly dropped your glass at the sight of him walking in. The suit was a deep brown color while his shirt was black with a patterned slash draping over him. Even without the fur and leather, he still huge and looked intimidating and you couldn’t help but clench your thighs together in arousal. You noticed his head turn in your direction making shuffle to turn around. “Well, I must say he cleans up very nicely.”

“Sssh.” You hissed. A chime went off summoning everyone to their seats at the circular tables. You found your way to your seat and tried focusing on other things around the room. You were shocked out of your spacing out by getting a whiff of a woodsy cologne. You turned to see M’Baku taking the seat to your left. You cursed yourself in your head knowing you had just subjected yourself to a night of torment.

“Did you receive my gift?” M’Baku said.

You looked over to him, studying his smirk. “Why give it back now?”

“Do you remember what I told you when I gave it to you?” he asked. You swallowed a lump in your throat. “I told you that…”

“You loved me and you meant it when you said that our differences didn’t sway your love. I know, don’t remind me.” You said, smiling and waving at a guest that walked in and motioned to you.

“I gave you the necklace to remind you.” M’Baku chuckled.

“You’ll have it back by the end of the night.” You whispered.

“That’s the thing about a gift, Y/N. You aren’t supposed to give it back.” M’Baku teased.

“Another thing about a gift is you don’t take it back, either.” You fired back.

“Clearly, my mistake.” He said, mockingly. You turned your head, glancing over at him with daggers in your eyes but, his were soft. Your heart was pounding all of a sudden from being so close to him.

“I can’t wait until you leave.” You growled. M’Baku snickered at your comment.                                                                                          

“By the way, Y/N. You look absolutely stunning.” He whispered, leaning into you. His breath tickled your neck almost pulling a gasp from you.

You inched away from him, catching his lustful eyes. You scoffed, disgusted and waved him off. The banquet went on with food being served and chatter with the who’s who of Wakanda. Finally, T’Challa made his way up to the stage.

“I want to thank everyone for coming out tonight. As many of you know, Wakanda since coming out to the world has flourished. We faced our hardships but, nonetheless we’ve thrived. We’ve established outreach programs America and England to help their minority populations. We’ve partnered with our neighboring countries to extend a helping hand in their development. Wakanda has ambassadors and we have seats in major world organizations like the U.N.” T’Challa said earning applause from everyone in the crowd. “However, though I am King. I did not do this alone. Ladies and gentlemen, I would like to acknowledge the woman that all of this possible. I gave her the position and she ran with it. We gave her an inch and she made it a mile. She is the reason why Wakanda is now seen as a major power. Help me in honoring our political advisor, Y/N Y/L/N.”

Everyone turned in your direction, clapping. You smiled as you stood up to walk onto the stage. You turned back to the crowd to see people actually standing as they clapped for you. You pressed your lips together to hide the smile and your eyes began to water.

“For your outstanding determination and valor, let us thank you.” T’Challa said. Nakia came up and handed you a plaque with your name on it. You smiled looking at what your hard work got you. “I hope I speak for the entire council and all of Wakanda when I say that you’ve done more for us in a year and a half than we have ever asked of you. Thank you for everything.”

You wiped the few tears that managed to escape your eyes as Nakia hugged you and T’Challa shook your hand. Everyone started clapping again, pulling more tears from you. You stepped off the stage with T’Challa and Nakia. “Please, don’t tell me thank you again. I can’t, this is too much.” You said using a napkin that Nakia gave you to dab your eyes.

“You deserve it.” Nakia said.

“We’ve been lucky to have you.” T’Challa said.

You walked back to your table with M’Baku eyeballing you as you came to sit down. “What are you looking at?” you said.

“You’re almost done, right?” M’Baku said. “Being a political advisor for the royal council?”

You rolled your eyes. “What made you come to that conclusion?”

“Well, T’Challa made you an offer. So would you allow me to make you one?” M’Baku said.

“And what offer could you possibly make me?” you said picking up your wine glass.

“You’re educated. Come back to the Jabari and help me organize an education system for our children.” He said.

You smacked your lips, looking over at him. “No.”

“Why not? You were going into education anyway. Why wait on hearing back from a university when I’m giving you an opportunity now.” M’Baku said. “Besides, it was your idea in the first place. Why not see it come to fruition?”

“Because, I don’t want to be under your thumb.” You snarled.

“You wouldn’t be. I’d give you free reign. You do what you want to do. I would just enforce.” M’Baku said.

“You give me the necklace back, offer me a job…seems like a ploy to get me back.” You said, sipping your wine.

“Is it working?” M’Baku said turning to you. You laughed until you noticed the sincerity in his eyes.

“You aren’t joking, are you?” you said. “Tell me you are.”

M’Baku’s face didn’t change. His eyes told you everything. He didn’t have to say a word. You didn’t want to believe that he was trying to reel you in but, here he was. Trying to suck you in as if he wasn’t the one that broke your heart.

You scoffed, taking in the rest of your wine. “You’re unbelievable.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way.” M’Baku said. “But, I’m serious.”

You glared him in the eye. “Come back to the Jabari.”

“No.” You said.

M’Baku sighed. “If you don’t want to come back to me, that’s fine. But, would you stray away from helping the Jabari? Come back and help further us as a people.”

“I couldn’t do it when I was there. So why would I do it now?” you said. “Just because you call. You want me back after all this time. No thank you.”

“What would I have to do?” he said.

“Nothing. There is nothing you could do.” You said.

“Y/N.” M’Baku called.

“Stop. I’m not doing this. You can’t come here and expect to get me back. You’re welcome to stop by my apartment to pick up the necklace. After that, I never want to see you again.” You said before getting up and making a break for the bathroom.

You sat on the couch of your apartment with your glass of wine, seething from leaving the banquet. There was a heavy knock at your door. You sprung up from the couch and went to your door. You swung it open to M’Baku, still in his tuxedo. It didn’t matter how good he looked, you were angry.

“Can I…” he started.

“No.” You growled. You whirled around going to your breakfast table and picking up the wooden box. “Take it and go. I hope you enjoyed your stay and I wish you well in your future endeavors with the council.” You tried to shut the door but, M’Baku held it open with his large hand.

“Let me talk to you.” M’Baku said.

“I’ve heard enough.” You said.

“Y/N, I love you.”

You fought the gasp that wanted to leave your throat. You shook your head violently, earrings slapping your cheeks. “No, don’t tell me that. You don’t get to say that. You don’t love me. It’s been over a year, you couldn’t possibly.”

“But, I do. I didn’t stop and only Hanuman knows why I couldn’t. I tried to fight my feelings and pain every day. I even tried looking for you in other women but, that was a mistake altogether.” He said stepping into the apartment and closing your door.

“Why are you telling me this?” you said.

“Because, I was weak. I couldn’t stand to watch you mature before me and it was even more unbearable living without you. Not having your input during council meetings, you bringing ideas to the table, disputing with me, matching my stubbornness. You are more than what I needed and I didn’t deserve you.” M’Baku said.

“You barely deserve me now.” You said.

“I know. And asking you to come back with me at a time like this was a feeble attempt. But, I stand here asking you to love me like you did then.” M’Baku said.

“Stop it.” You said, covering your ears. Clearly a poor attempt at trying to shield yourself from M’Baku breaking you down as he was indeed getting to you. M’Baku put the necklace box on the counter of your kitchen and grasped your wrists. “Please, just leave.”

“I hurt you, I know.” He said. You nodded in agreement. “Please, Y/N. Let me right my wrongs. Give me the chance to fix my mistakes. I want to fix it. I want us to be together again.”

“M’Baku, no.” you whimpered.

“I love you.” M’Baku whispered tenderly in your ear. “Tell me you love me.”

“I can’t.” you said. At this point, it was a fight between your brain and your heart. One told you that you could love him again and you could even work with him. The other told you that the idea of being with him was more foolish than sound. You winced at the internal battle within you and the physical one you were getting ready to fight.

M’Baku wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you close. He craned his neck, putting his lips close to yours. “Y/N, please. I don’t want to leave here without you.”

You whimpered as his large hands gripped your waist. Part of you wanted to fight him but, you were already melting under his touch. A flame inside you, reignited and it wasn’t going to be put out anytime soon. You found the strength to lean up on your toes of your heels. M’Baku didn’t waste much time, falling into a kiss.

You moaned into his mouth, electricity flowing through you at the feel of M’Baku’s lips. Your body reacting in a way so long forgotten that it almost felt foreign. You didn’t think you’d fall into this the way you did but, you were complaining at the moment. Your fingers dug into the skin of his neck as you tried pulling yourself closer as if that was even possible. The heat coming off the both of you was beckoning you to go further.

M’Baku pulled away from you, looking into your eyes for confirmation to go further. His answer was you kicking off your heels behind you and tugging on the suit jacket. M’Baku obliged unbuttoning it and tossing it. He undid his shirt as you pulled on his belt, leading him into your bedroom. You reached behind you to grasp the zipper of your dress.

“No. Let me do it” M’Baku huffed. You slowly turned around at his requests. You felt the dress come loosen. M’Baku’s fingers grazed your exposed shoulders and found the edge of your dress. He turned you around and slightly tugged at the top of your dress, letting it fall. Your large plump breasts, finally free. You stepped out of it, looking at M’Baku. He looked at you in awe. His memory of you didn’t serve him justice, looking at you now was what he needed. He let his unbuttoned shirt fall to the ground. He pulled you into him, giving you a passionate kiss. You backed yourself into the bed, pulling him down on top of you. He moved from your lips to kiss your neck. A moan left your lips. Your body was aching for this. You had a few one night stands during your time but, nothing like this. M’Baku knew your body. He was the only man who could touch literally anywhere and make you aroused.

M’Baku slid down and kneeled on the floor. You rested your legs on his broad shoulders, letting him pull your panties from you. He grabbed your feet, kissing the tops of them. Your toes curled at how soft and gentle he was in this moment. He kissed the tattoos around your ankles, letting his fingers trace them. He opened your legs again, letting them rest back on his shoulders. You moaned at the feel of a kiss on your inner thigh. You grabbed onto his coarse hair, preparing for what was to come next. M’Baku leaned his head in, dipping his tongue into you. You let a moan leave your lips as you began to quiver already.

“It’s been too long.” M’Baku said against you. The vibrations made you squirm. You moved your hips into him as if you wanted to ride his tongue. M’Baku sensed your eagerness as he inserted one finger inside you and pressed the tip of his tongue into your clit. You clutched the sheets as whines leave your mouth. M’Baku watched your chest rise and fall and you tried hanging on, not wanting to come so soon.

“M’Baku, fuck.” You gasped as you clenched around his finger. He inserted another one inside you, pumping them into you slowly. Your toes gripped the edge of the bed. You felt the pressure in your stomach building up and your moans got louder.

“Are you ready to cum for me?” he said. You nodded, frantically while rolling your hips into his thick, long fingers. “I want it on my tongue, Y/N.” He removed his fingers as he put his tongue back to your lick and let it glide over your lips, flicking it. You shook and arched your back. Your body seizing up as you felt your orgasm rush through you.

M’Baku didn’t miss one bit of it, licking you cleaning and keeping you wet. You pulled on his hair, pushing his face into you. You bit your lip as you practically rode his face, edging you into another orgasm. M’Baku moved his tongue along with you, gripping your thighs. He hummed against you, making the vibrations that you yearned for. Your walls started contracted all over again. “I’m coming!” you yelled. M’Baku pulled away from you to watch you writhe in your orgasm. He spread your lips to see the full view of you, contracting and dripping on your sheets.

M’Baku rose to his feet, undoing his belt and pants. You jumped up to kiss him, tasting yourself. You moved his hands as you yanked his zipper down. You felt his erection spring free against your thigh. You broke the kiss to look down at his length. You reached down stroking him, earning a low grunt from him. He placed a hand on the back of your neck, causing you to lean down. You placed a soft kiss on his tip before wrapping your tongue around his member. He shuddered at the feel of your tongue. His fingers intertwined in your braids as you bobbed your head. You eased yourself all the way down, taking in his entire length, deep throating him. You extended tongue to touch the base of his member. You heard him curse in Xhosa, letting you know that you did something right. You pulled him out of your mouth to look up at him, still stroking him. His mouth gaped open, watching you. You smiled, dipping your head back down and bringing him into your mouth. You gagged as he made it to the back of your throat.

M’Baku let out a soft moan as you focused on his tip as he moved your braids from your face. You used your free hand to cup his balls, massaging them. M’Baku let a gasp escape his lips. “By Hanuman, you will be my undoing.” You felt him twitch inside your mouth, knowing he was close to his orgasm. You hallowed out your mouth, swallowing him in. M’Baku gripped the back of your neck as he braced himself. You pressed your hands on his hips, stopping him from forcing himself down your throat. With a loud grunt, you felt M’Baku release down your throat. Once he was done, you pulled away from him, gracefully wiping your mouth. He cupped your face, looking down at you breathlessly.

“Lay back.” He whispered. You took his hands and eased back onto the mattress, pulling him on top of you. You opened your legs for him, letting him lean into you. He gave you one last kiss before pushing himself inside you, giving you only half his length. You moaned in his mouth, forgetting how he felt. Every time you laid together came rushing back to you. Your muscle memory kicked in, wrapping your legs around him and gripping his shoulders. M’Baku fought not to immediately give you a forceful pump as his body was needy for you just like yours.

You nuzzled yourself in the crook of his neck, gasping. “M’Baku, I need you to move.”

“Tell me you need me again, Y/N. I want to hear it.” he said, looking into your eyes.

“I need you.” You said in the most seductive voice you could muster. M’Baku rolled his hips once and your eyes were already rolling back. “Yes.” You moaned. M’Baku moved slow, sending drawn out waves of pleasure through. Your nails scratched along his tattoos as his pumps got faster. The force of his thrusts caused the sound of skin slapping to fill the room with your moans.

M’Baku lifted off you, balancing on his palms. Your hands rested on his neck as he plowed into you. You kept your legs around his hips, pushing him further into you. “All of it. Please, give me all of it.” M’Baku rolled his hips deeper and faster into you. You looked down watching how M’Baku’s member was glistening with your juices. You could hear the squishing of your womanhood and your legs began to shake.

“You’re close,” M’Baku said, sounding more like he was telling you than a question.

You nodded with your hands moving back to his shoulders. He quickened his pace, crashing into you. Your moans grew louder as his movements became more messy and erratic. “M’Baku, damn it!” You cried. His groans and gasps became louder. You arched your back after feeling the pressure in your stomach build up again. M’Baku lowered himself down, kissing you. He consumed your moans as you wrapped yourself around completely. Your walls contracted and then tightened completely. M’Baku gave you one heavy pump, shooting into you and leading into your own orgasm.

M’Baku broke the kiss to look down at you. You gazed at each other, breathless and sweaty. Your hands caressed his chest, the sensation of rubbing his bare chest made the moment even better. You both hadn’t felt this in a long time.

M’Baku leaned down to plant another kiss on your neck as he pulled out of you. He sat on the bed, lifting you up to sit on his lap. You latched onto his neck, initiating another kiss. You pulled away from him, running your fingers through his hair and into his beard. You sat there straddling him, not wanting to form words in the event you’d ruin the moment. However, the silence was beckoning you to do something.

M’Baku rested against the plush headboard as you massaged your breasts. You moaned as he pinched your nipples. He left a soft, wet kiss on your right breasts before moving to the left. He pulled you closer, running a fingertip up and down your spine. You let out a soft moan, sensitive to touch in this area. You loved that he remembered where to touch you. He knew every curve of you and you knew every scar on him. You grazed the small scratches on his arms from sparring. You wiped the beads of sweat from his brow, both of you enjoying the tender moment that came with coming down from your highs.

M’Baku gripped the backs of your thighs, lifting you up. A gasp came from you as you felt his tip on your wet lips. You braced yourself on his shoulders as you sank down on him. He moaned at being engulfed in your wetness. You started to grind into him, getting vocal reactions from the both of you. You threw your head back, shaking your braids. M’Baku palmed your ass, letting you know that you were doing something right. You bounced on him then, twirled your hips on him. M’Baku cursed in front of you, earning a giggle out of you.

“You like this?” you asked.

“I love it. Do it again.” M’Baku huffed in your neck.

You moved your hips in a circular motion, throwing it in a circle. M’Baku bucked his hips into you with a loud grunt. His grip on your ass got tighter. You moved your hands from M’Baku’s shoulders to the top of your tufted headboard, gaining more leverage and your pace quickened. You changed your tempo, from twirling to putting an arch in your back and bouncing on him. Your ass clapping on him got you even more aroused. M’Baku’s thighs began to tense up letting you know he was close like you. “Almost there.” You whined.

M’Baku gripped your hips, his thumbs almost bruising your waist at how tight he was holding you. He watched you moved on him, enthralled. His chest rising and falling as you brought him to the edge. You became tight around him and your body seized up. M’Baku took control using his large hands to move your hips and in four short movements, you felt yourself come undone. You let out a labored scream, leading M’Baku’s hips to push you up as he came. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he shook beneath you.

M’Baku relaxed on the bed and rolled over. He laid you on the soft pillows as he pulled out of you. He hovered over you, wiping the sweat from your face. He eased the covers from under you and pulled them over him. M’Baku laid his head down on your chest as you played in his curls. The sounds of your heartbeat lulled him to sleep as you drifted off to his soft snores.

You awoke to the sun breaking through your curtains. You felt snore from last night’s activities and you felt the weight of M’Baku’s head on your chest. You looked down to see him watching you. You smiled at him, a silent good morning. He leaned up and laid a soft peck on your lips. He moved under the sheets to lay on the side of you. You rolled on your side to face him as he still laid on his stomach, looking into your eyes.

“Do you know how long it’s been…since a woman has really pleased me?” M’Baku said. “Not one time have I experienced the same feelings with you that I have anyone else.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have let me go.” You chuckled.

“Y/N, I’m serious. Come home with me.” M’Baku said. “I won’t stand in your way this time.”

You looked into his eyes. There was no longer lust or that sensual hunger. It was all sincerity. This was a look you hadn’t seen from him before. Loving, needy. His eyes begged you to open yourself up to him again. Your heart wanted to jump out of your chest and run into his arms. M’Baku really wanted you back. Needed you back. “M’Baku…”

“Don’t tell me no.” he whispered.

“What if I can’t tell you yes?” you asked.

M’Baku fell silent. He looked over you, out the window at the city coming to life for the day. “I was supposed to leave this morning.”

“I’m sure they are looking for you.” You said looking out of the window with him.

“Y/N, please. Come home.” M’Baku said in an exhausted whine.

“I can’t just pack up and come with you.” You said shaking your head.

“Then, what did we do here?” M’Baku asked. “Y/N, what did we do in this bed? I told you that I love you and even still you don’t…”

“You can’t expect to bat your eyes, tell me sweet nothings, and seduce me and I’ll jump into your arms for you to carry me back up those mountains. This isn’t a fairytale. It’s not that simple.” You said.

“Tell me you love me.” M’Baku said. “You never said it and I need you to say it.”

“M’Baku…please.” You whimpered.

“Tell me. Say you love me and that you forgive me.” M’Baku said. You reached over caressing his cheek, hoping that giving him physical affection would appease him but, M’Baku wasn’t going to be fooled. “If you won’t say it…I understand.” You watched him get out of your bed and start putting his clothes back on. You clutched the sheets over your chest and sat up. He kept his back to you. You didn’t understand why the tears were falling but, they were. Your heart was hurting all over again.

“I’m sorry for what I did. You didn’t deserve that. I want you to know that despite our differences, I love you. And since Hanuman seems fit to punish me for how I wronged you, I’ll live with not having you again.” He said. You watched him, plop down on the bed, practically shaking it as he laced his shoes up.

You stood there speechless, fighting the sobs that ripped through you. M’Baku, silently, stood up and walked out of your bedroom. You ripped the sheets from the bed, hurriedly wrapping them around you and balling up the bottom so you could walk freely. “M’Baku, wait.”

M’Baku refused to face you as he pulled his jacket over his arms and buttoned it. He went over to the wooden box, opening it and removing the necklace. He sighed, heavily. He turned to you holding it in his hands, anxious. He walked up to you, unclipping it. You didn’t move as M’Baku placed it on your latching it together and fixing it on you to look perfect.

“Keep it. It’s yours. I could never give it to someone else.” He said. You parted your lips to speak but, M’Baku leaned down to give you a slow passionate kiss. You both stayed like that as if you were frozen in time. Neither of you wanting to break the kiss but, you both knew you had to. You shuddered as M’Baku pulled away from you. He wiped your tears from your cheeks. He pulled you in for a hug, putting his nose into your hair, taken in your scent. He wanted to feel you for the last time. He wanted to savor this moment because for all the both of you knew…you’d never see each other again.

M’Baku pulled away with a sigh. His eyes threatening to let his tears fall. He closed his eyes and rubbed his face, fighting his own emotions. You looked to him with a pained look, biting your lip to fight off any sound of weakness. At the same time, anything you said would make him stay. It would let him know how you really felt. It would let him know that his attempts weren’t futile and he did, in fact, win you back. But alas, he had to leave and you weren’t going with him.

Without another word, M’Baku walked to the door of your apartment. The pain in your chest from holding the sobs back was crushing. He glanced back at you, nodding to you, a silent, solemn goodbye.

As soon as the door shut, a sob reaped from you. You went to the door and pressed your hands against it but, you could hear his heavy footsteps retreating away. You held yourself as you slid to the floor. “I love you.” You whispered as if he would be able to hear it. You should have said it while he was in the same room as you. A chance you’d never get again.

M’Baku let out a heavy sigh as another tribe meeting ended. He let his knobkerrie rest against his shoulder as he let his elbows rest on his knees and hung his head. M’Baku was still reeling from his time in the Golden City. He missed you. Often, his thoughts would drift off to you but, it was all torture because he didn’t have you. His thoughts were interrupted by a guard coming in.

“What is it, now?” he said with clear annoyance in his voice.

“Lord M’Baku. Someone has requested an audience with you.” The guard said.

M’Baku pinched the bridge of his nose and motioned for the guard to escort them in. He kept his eyes shut as he heard the light footsteps of whoever was disturbing his peace. “You’re not going to have long so I suggest you start talking.”

“Well.” A familiar voice said. His eyes snapped open. He looked up to find you standing before him in Jabari attire, your natural hair with a faded brown dye on the ends like his, and his necklace adorning your neck. “I understand you are in need of someone to oversee your education department. Should I start with how you should structure it or the curriculum, Lord M’Baku?”

M’Baku smiled at you, jumping up from his throne and rushing up to you. You opened your arms, letting him crash into you. You were lifted into the air, pulling a childlike laugh from you. “How are you here?”

“I remember being offered a position, sir. I was coming to see if it was taken.” You said playfully.

“It is now.” M’Baku said leaning down to kiss you.

[diditonceinadream-blog]

BNHA x BE CROSSOVER

Ch. 3

Rin's Hero Costume, Mk. 1 👇

Alright guys, we get our first look at the ExWire gang in this chapter. I made Bon's personality a bit more out there just because he has a seduction quirk and holds power over everyone else because of it. He's still the same genius, straight-laced guy, and that will show up in later chapters once we spend more time with Rin's friends.

-------------------

Over the days, routines were made. Get up, shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, and head off to school. And every day Yukio insisted on hugging Rin goodbye, while Rin kept trying to punch him for it.

Some of Rin's classmates saw and seemed very confused.

"Hey, Okumura!" Kirishima called him over. He walked to him, Kaminari, Ashido, and Hagakure. "What's up?" He greeted. "Who's the guy that's always hitting on you?" Ashido wondered. "Mina! You can't just blurt things out like that!" Hagakure hissed.

They were cut off by Rin's laugh. "Nah, it's ok. That's my twin. He's got some attachment issues. Guess that's what happens when you've got no one to take care of you but a brother a couple hours older than you, huh?" Rin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Wait, you don't have parents?!" Hagakure exclaimed. Rin shook his head. "Nope! But don't feel bad. It's better this way. Trust me."

"Yeah, no curfew and no rules." Kaminari grinned. Rin sighed. "That would be a lot of fun, but Yukio insisted we needed curfew and rules to keep us safe and under control. We kinda just raised ourselves since no one else could. We had to grow up real quick." Rin shrugged. Kaminari frowned. "Aww, party pooper." He joked. They all laughed.

At that point, class started. They went to their regular classes like English and Math.

§~•~§~•~§

Finally, lunch rolled around. Rin found his brother with his friends and sat with them. He knew Yukio didn't really like anyone but Shiemi.

"Hey Suguro! How're you holding up in the second hero course?" Rin wondered. He groaned. "If fuckin' Monoma doesn't shut his trap about beating Class 1A, I'm gonna bring him to his knees and it's gonna be painful." He growled. Rin laughed. "Shiemi, Shima, what about you guys?"

Shiemi smiled, playing with the little leaf-man she'd made out of seeds and leaves."Oh, things are going well. Everyone is nice. They're kind of noisy though..." She trailed off. "There's this one chick named Hatsume. She keeps hitting on Shiemi, but Shiemi's too oblivious." Shima snickered. They all laughed at the girl's red face. "H-Hey! I don't really know how to handle that stuff!" She cried.

"It's okay, Shiemi. If you find you don't mind Hatsume's presence and don't mind spending time with her, I can help you figure out what to do for a date and what goodies to give her." Shima promised. "Uh, no, I will. I don't trust you and other people's partners." Rin shook his head.

"Oh, so you trust the guy with a seduction quirk, but not me?!" Shima huffed indignantly. "Yes. Because I have total control of the guy with the seduction quirk." Rin answered. Suguro smirked and pulled the fire user into his lap–something he knew would annoy the younger, placing his chin on the boy's shoulder. "What was that about having control over me, blueberry?" He snickered. "Hey! Suguro!" He growled, elevating his body temperature with flames so the boy let go of him. Rin laughed at his friend's grumbling before he spotted Midoriya across the cafeteria watching them curiously. He waved.

The green haired boy blushed at being noticed and then looked down at his food.

"Deku, what's wrong?" Uraraka questioned. Iida looked at him. "Something is bothering you, Midoriya?" He guessed. "Uh...no, it's just...Okumura-kun and his friends. They look so comfortable together." He said wistfully. Just as he said so, the aforementioned people walked up and sat down around the trio. Midoriya wondered how they'd gotten there so fast.

"Hey Midoriya. Whatcha up to?" Rin greeted. The poor boy jumped out of his skin. "Kinda skittish, huh? He's like Shiemi." Izumo commented. The blonde smiled at the green haired boy. "Hello. I'm Moriyama Shiemi. I'm Rin's friend. It's nice to meet you." She introduced. Rin's friends gave their introductions, following her lead.

"And I'm Yukio, Rin's twin." The taller boy sitting on the other side of Iida said. "Hmm, you guys don't really look alike." Hagakure and Ashido had apparently made their way over. "Mina!" Hagakure sounded exasperated. Suguro guessed she just blurted out whatever she was thinking a lot of the time. "That's okay. I wouldn't wanna be a pretty boy like Nii-san." Yukio teased. "Watch it genius, I feed you and you don't know what I put in that food." Rin warned playfully.

"Rin's kinda snappy today, huh Okumura?" Suguro grinned, wrapping his arm tighter around Rin's waist. Ashido squealed. "Is this the guy with the seduction quirk?" She asked.

"Well, nothing escapes you, does it?" Izumo snarked. "Hey," Rin shot a small flame at her arm, where it sizzled on her sleeve. "Be nice. Not everybody is as observant and snobby as you, Eyebrows."

"I told you my name is Kamiki Izumo!"

"Ooh, cat fight." Shima grinned, leaning forward. "Do I look like a girl to you?" Rin turned to the pink haired boy.

"You guys are so mean to Rin." Uraraka giggled. "How is that funny?" Iida questioned. "Nah, s'okay. We know each other well enough to trash talk each other and still be friends. Long as no one steps over the line, we're good. I can call Kamiki a stone cold bitch all I want and she won't do anything cause she knows it's true." Rin brushed it off.

Except right after that, birds started pecking at his head. "Ow, ow, Kamiki, call off the birds!" Rin held his arms up in defense.

Rin heard a familiar laugh and glared at Bakugou from across the room. "Uh oh. I sense a rivalry." Hagakure sang. "I think Bakugou has a three way rivalry with Midoriya, Rin, and Todoroki. That guy's got some serious issues." Ashido added. When the explosive blonde in question turned away, Rin spit a tiny ball of fire and they all watched until it hit it's target: Bakugou's hair. Rin cursed("Ohshit") and ducked behind Suguro. Bakugou turned to glower at Rin and didn't see him, so he immediately got up and ran out of the room, no doubt hunting the boy down.

Rin came back up, grinning. "Nice one, Rin. Now he'll be running in the halls like a maniac until he realizes you're still here and that he just looks like an angry psycho." Shima snickered. "We should refrain from using our quirks out of classes." Konekomeru put in quietly. "Yes, I agree with Miwa-kun." Iida did karate chops in the air with his hands. Rin snorted. "Little too late for that, guys."

The bell rang and the group split, going to their more abnormal courses.

§~•~§~•~§

As they waited for the teacher to arrive, Rin heard running in the hallway and cocked his head to the side in confusion right before All Might burst into the room.

"I HAVE.....COME THROUGH THE DOOR LIKE NORMAL!!!" He yelled. Rin snorted out a laugh. It seemed like he would rather have come in through the window. Some students freaked out and got excited, some students fanboyed(Midoriya), and then some just smiled and laughed.

The Number One Hero posed in front of the class and began talking(well, it was more like shouting....).

"Hero Basic Training-The class that'll put you through all sorts of special training to mold you into heroes!"

He showed them a card. "No time for dallying, today's activity is this! Battle!" He shouted. Rin couldn't help but smile at the man's excitement. He seemed genuinely happy to be here teaching them, whereas Aizawa was more like a teacher that never wanted to be a teacher in the first place, but needed a job and just took what he could get.

Something slid out of the walls, revealing cases with numbers on them. Are those.....?

Rin grinned once All Might announced that these were their hero costumes they'd ordered. They all retrieved their numbers. Everybody cheered and headed to the changing rooms to put on their costumes.

§~•~§~•~§

Rin grinned as he slipped on his gloves and moved to lace his boots up. He went out to meet everyone else. Kirishima was with Kaminari. The redhead had metal all over his body and even across his face and Kirishima just had some kind of device on the side of his head. "Hey Okumura!" He greeted. "So, what's up with your costume? Going for the Assassin's Creed look?" Kaminari teased. Rin grinned. "It's all fire proof and it's easy to move in. Plus, the material guards me from anything like Mina's poison." Rin explained.

"Oh yeah, your quirk. What exactly is your quirk?" Kaminari wondered. "It's fire." Rin held a hand out and a small blue flame appeared, flickering in his palms and on his fingers. "I can breathe it, I can blast it from my hands, I can cover my body in it. My brother and I grew up in a rough neighborhood, so we made sure to keep our quirks trained in case anything happened so I can even control the temperature of my flames too, though the lowest I can get it is about 23°C." Rin answered. "It's so hot it's blue? Interesting!" Kirishima examined he small flame in tins palm.

"Wow, that sounds awesome! I can only do one big blast, but it kinda fries my brain, so...." Kaminari scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.

"I can harden!" Kirishima shouted excitedly, hardening his arm until it looked like rock. Rin stifled a laugh behind his hand. "I'm pretty sure every guy can do that, Kirishima." He sniggered. "Oi, that's not what I meant!" The redhead complained. Rin and Kaminari laughed, leaning on each other while Kirishima's face turned redder than his hair.

"Alright! Now that you have these costumes, from now on, you are all heroes!" All Might announced. Rin heard footsteps and looked behind him. Midoriya was just arriving from the tunnel behind everybody. Man, this guy is a mess.

Rin had to cover his mouth to keep from laughing out loud. The boy's costume was his own signature color, but it was pretty obvious who he modeled it after. Rin looked between Izuku and All Might and he could tell the Number One Hero had noticed. Midoriya, stop trying so hard!

All Might explained how they were going to work in teams and fight each other as heroes against villains.

This is either gonna be insane fun or a complete disaster......