#in hopes that you can still keep things together.

[pellucid-constellations]

Lessons in Care

Pairing: Line Cook!Azriel x Reader

Summary: Azriel loves you so much. Even though you can't cook. You're trying though.

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: A small injury

a/n: Consider this a small gift to make up for me disappearing for a month <3 This is part of the line cook au, but as I've mentioned, nothing is really in order so read however you want :) The rest of this AU can be found in my masterlist right there ⬇ love you <3

Main Masterlist ♡

~~

“Like this?” You shook the pan a little harder, the handle's weight tweaking your wrist at an odd angle. 

“Almost. Try not to hold your elbow so close to your body. It won’t flip right.” 

You pressed your lips together and narrowed your eyes. “This is so hard.” 

“I believe in you,” Azriel teased, an amused upturn of his eyes as he watched you struggle. 

“Why is this pan so heavy? It’s literally like 40 pounds.” 

“It’s cast iron, baby.” 

“That’s stupid.” 

Azriel barked out a laugh, red tinting his cheeks as if he hadn’t expected the sound to leave his lips. Your mouth quirked up in a small smile despite your struggle. You shot your gaze to the side to try and catch the sweet expression that still lingered on Azriel’s face.

“Would you like me to do it?” Azriel posed after clearing his throat. 

“Of course not. I came early so you could teach me.” 

“I could teach you another time. You have class soon.” 

“Why do you want me to fail?” 

“I don’t—” 

“You totally do. You want me unable to cook for myself so I’ll always have to rely on you, and then I’ll never be able to leave you.” 

Azriel laughed again, a quiet, rumbling sound. “You caught me. Now hand that over before you hurt yourself.” 

You groaned and turned slightly to evade your boyfriend’s reach. “Az, I’m serious. Teach me how to flip these stupid eggs right now.” 

“Okay, okay. Just let me help.” 

The feel of Azriel’s hand lightly sliding over yours startled you. You jumped and your fingers twitched, the sudden motion sending the tips of your fingers too far forward until a simmering pain shot through your skin. You flung the pan back on the burner instantly, its contents splattering along the stove and into the open flame. It burned a bright orange and then settled as you held your hand close to your chest. 

You hissed a breath through your teeth and Azriel’s hands were on you. 

“Shit, baby, let me see, yeah?” he stressed, mindlessly turning the burner off without taking his eyes off you. He tugged your hand at your chest with gentle fingers. “Let me see.” 

You released the tight grip on your fingers and rested them in Azriel’s open palm. “I was just surprised. I don’t think it’s that bad.” 

Azriel’s brow furrowed as he examined your burn. He tsked, pulling you gently by your wrist over to the sink. “It’s going to blister.” 

Cool water rushed from the pipes and soothed your skin. Azriel held your wrist in a soft grip and turned your hand slowly, back and forth in a repetitive motion. 

“I don’t think so, Az. It’s not that bad.” 

Azriel shook his head. “That pan was pretty hot—I’d be surprised if it didn’t.” He looked up at you. “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to scare you.” 

You offered a gentle smile and pressed a kiss to his jaw. “You didn’t scare me.” You raised your brow playfully. “You just made me nervous. A cute guy like you holding my hand—reaching over to help me to cook. Made me all jumpy.” 

Azriel breathed out a disbelieving scoff. “I’ve done far worse than just hold your hand.” 

“Scandalous!” you proclaimed, affronted. “How can you say such things at work, Azriel? You’ll be fired.” 

“I can only hope,” Azriel grumbled. 

Azriel directed you to keep your hand under the water as he dug through a cabinet for the first-aid kit despite your protests. You truly felt that you were fine and didn’t even need a bandaid, but it was easy to forget the multitude of scars that littered Azriel’s hands and how they contrasted with your completely unmarred skin. 

That was purposeful, meaningful—Azriel worked hard so you wouldn't have to. Azriel found peace in keeping you safe and happy. 

So you let him fuss. 

“Okay, let me see again, baby,” Azriel requested, flipping the water off and reaching for your hand. Your skin stung as it met the air beyond the sink, but Azriel’s caring touch was like a balm. 

He dried your fingers with a towel and uncapped a spray bottle, coating your burn with too much of the medication before grabbing a set of gauze and tape. You stared at the materials in exasperation. Azriel didn’t notice the expression and continued to admisinister care as if you’d been in a fire.

“Az, I love you so much, but I don’t need all of that. It’s a small burn. I’ve probably done worse with my curling iron.” 

Your boyfriend only hummed and continued his work. “I don’t want it to scar. It blistered already.” 

“Yes, but—” 

“Almost done.”

You let him work. A few moments of silence passed. Azriel kept his gaze hard and his brow set in a harsh line. 

That wouldn’t do. 

Once your finger was fully wrapped and protected from everything Azriel could fear, you puckered your lips in contemplation and shook your head. 

“Still hurts really bad,” you admitted, leaning back against the counter. Azriel followed your movements, leaving little space between you. 

“What?” he questioned, a tinge of panic in his tone. “That should’ve numbed it. How bad does it hurt?” 

“Really, really bad. Like my whole hand is on fire, actually.”

Azriel—who had yet to release your fingers—stared down at them in startled befuddlement. He turned them one way and then another as if that would answer his questioning gaze, and then looked back up to meet your eyes in a way that was almost pleading. 

“I’m sorry, maybe I should—”

“You have to kiss it,” you revealed, not wanting the sad expression to linger on his face any longer. “Duh.” 

Azriel let out a breath that bordered on relief, but most of it seemed founded in exasperation. He shook his head and brought your fingers up to his lips all the same, smiling to himself as he began to kiss each of your fingertips. Even the ones that clearly weren’t burnt. He flipped your hand over and kissed the knuckles, too, capturing your eyes as he glanced at you from beneath his lashes. 

“‘M sorry you got hurt,” he mumbled with his lips against the back of your hand. “Told you you shouldn’t try cooking, baby.” 

The warm feeling that had begun to seep into your chest paled in comparison to the offended scoff that echoed in the empty kitchen. Azriel’s poorly concealed, devious smile was hidden in the kisses he started pressing into your palm, and although it would have fit the sound you let out, you didn’t pull away. 

“Azriel, you are just asking for me to—” 

“The hell is going on in here?” The kitchen door smacked against the frame as Cassian made his entrance. “Someone get hurt?” 

Azriel dropped your hand just as soon as Cassian had spotted him pressed against you, clearing his throat and turning to the disheveled first-aid kit on the counter. You brought your knuckles up to your mouth to hide your laugh at Azriel’s expense, his face flushing in vulnerability. 

“Oh, I see what was going on. You were romancing your girl, weren’t you, Az? Well, don’t let me interrupt. You came in early and everything,” Cassian teased, his hands raised in surrender. 

“We were just finishing up,” you countered, a laugh trickling through. “I have to get to class, Cass. You can start your shift.” 

“Uh huh,” Cassian smiled, raising his brows and then lowering them when he caught your hand reaching for your backpack. “You okay?” 

“She’s fine,” Azriel interrupted. He took your bag from you and slung it over his shoulder, pressing a nonchalant kiss to your head that you knew was actually not nonchalant. “I’m going to take her to school. Cover for me for 20?” 

“Sure, man.” 

“Az, I was going to take the bus you don’t have to—” 

“C’mon, baby.” 

“But I don’t even have my helmet for your bike.”

“I always bring your helmet.”

[maskedbyghost]

lets continue our talk about situationship!Simon, where this bitch grovels for monthssss

_______________________________________________

situationship!simon starts sending you text messages. before you could expect something like "you up?" or "come to my office.", but after you broke things off with him, simon started sending you heartfelt text messages, apologizing for his past behavior. “i’ve been thinking a lot about what happened between us,” he texted one night. “i realize now how much i hurt you, and i’m truly sorry, love. i understand if you need space, but i wanted you to know how much i regret everything.”

along with his messages, simon started sending you small but meaningful gifts. he remembered how you’d joked about his tea obsession once and that you’d mentioned you only liked chamomile. to your surprise, he found the best brand of chamomile tea and even packed it in a nice box before delivering it to your room.

he even started to open up more. during a late-night phone call, where you could clearly hear that he was drunk, simon said that he started seeing a therapist. “i’m workin on understandin my issues and changin for the better. i want to be better, not just for you love, but for myself. i hope you can see that i’m tryin to change.”

when you asked him to stop calling you love, he refused. “i can’t help it. you’re mine in a way no one else could be, and i don’t want to pretend otherwise.”

as simon keeps showing up with gifts and heartfelt messages, you can’t help but wonder if he’s being real or if he’s just trying to win you back before breaking your heart again.

you still go on dates with other people, and simon is tormented every time he sees you leaving the base in those pretty dresses—dresses he wishes were just for him. he follows you, quietly lurking in the corners of the restaurants or bars where you’re out with your dates. oddly enough, most of the guys you go out with either get transferred to another base or stop calling you after just one date, and you’re doing your best not to blame simon for it. but you know it's him. and he is not sorry at all.

almost every day, simon texts you, asking you out on dates and planning special things for the who of you. all you have to do is say yes, but each time, you refuse. it breaks his heart every time, but it also makes him more determined to try even harder. he knows he deserves this treatment from you.

back when you and simon used to train together on base, it was a special routine you both enjoyed. now, you’ve started asking other guys to help you with exercises, and it drives him wild with jealousy. watching their hands on you makes him see red. after your training sessions with them, simon invites these guys to spar with him. it quickly becomes clear that he’s using these sparring matches as a chance to take out his frustration and anger, landing a few extra hits just to make his point.

despite everything, you still won’t budge, and it’s only making simon more frustrated. the truth is, it’s becoming harder and harder for you to resist him. his persistence is wearing you down, and the more he pushes, the more you find yourself struggling to stay strong.

simon invites you to one of his therapy sessions, saying his therapist thinks it would be helpful for him and his progress. during the session, he opens up about his struggles and insecurities, laying everything bare. as he talks, you start to feel sympathy for him. it’s clear he’s determined to change and work on himself, and you see how genuine his efforts are.

one night, you were preparing tea in the kitchen when a girl you know from the base asked for simon’s number. she mentioned she was interested in him, which made you jealous. you snapped at her, making it clear that he would never be interested in a girl like her. simon overheard the whole thing and couldn’t help but smirk to himself. it was clear you still had feelings for him, and he took a bit of satisfaction in that.

later that night he sent one simple message to you: "that's my girl. i belong to you, and you only."

after that message, simon stepped up his game. he started sending you lots of sweet texts and little gifts, and even took care of some of your paperwork. it was hard to ignore how much he was trying, and you found it tougher to resist him as he kept showing you how much he cared.

a few months after managing to ignore simon as best as you could, you caught a nasty cold and were stuck in your room. you only texted price to let him know you needed a few days off because you were sick, and got back in your bed trying to sleep that cold off. a few hours later, as you were still trying to fall asleep, you heard your door open. simon walked in, carrying a bunch of bags, a worried look on his face.

“i came as soon as I could,” simon said, worry in his voice. “i brought you soup and medicine.”

simon didn’t leave your side for days. he only went back to his room to grab more clothes and shower. he was insistent on helping you with everything, even assisting you with your showers in the most respectful way possible of course. he’d sit in a chair next to your bed, and you felt a pang of guilt seeing how much he was giving up for you. you even tried to convince him to go get some rest, but despite your protests, he somehow ended up in your bed, gently spooning you as you slept.

simon would whisper sweet things in your hair, thinking you were asleep. you heard every word as he softly talked about how much he missed you, how sorry he was for everything, and how he wanted to make things right. even though you were sick and exhausted, his words touched you deeply.

once you were feeling better, you found simon sitting alone in a common room, lost in thought. you approached him quietly and gently kissed the side of his face. with a soft smile, you whispered, “take me on that date you promised.”

_______________________________________________

@daydreamerwoah

[widow-tarot]

MINI PAC READING: What Would They Tell You If They Could? (Romance)

GROUPS: 1 - 2 - 3 4 - 5 - 6

You can always tip me! - paypal.me/sadwidow

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Instruction: Think about your person while choosing a group. Do not use more than 1 group for one person. Just to remind you, this is only for entertainment purposes.

If you don't feel drawn to any group, then this reading is not for you.

GROUP 1

Cards: Ace of Wands, Knight of Wands rx, Wheel of Fortune rx, I Like You, Girl Talk rx, Pond, Archangel Metatron.

I like you. I know it's straightforward, but I cannot say it in any other way that's more meaningful or more direct. It might not sound meaningful but it is to me (I hope it is to you too). I feel there is a spiritual connection between us and it seems no matter what, we keep coming back to each other. Our connection is like a pond; can be insignificant to others but to us, it holds so much life and secrets but it can easily be destroyed if not cultivated. We are so hot and cold; we like each other, then we hate each other over something trivial (we both don't know what exactly annoyed us). I want to move towards you but things are holding me back. There's so much I want to do and say but I'm standing still. I know we will truly come together someday. No one knows about it because I don't share those feelings with friends. It seems too private and sacred.

SONGS:

Eric by Mitski ("Take off my clothes and watch me move; You can come closer, I'll let you hurt me; But how long, how long can we play this way?; I'm tired, I'm tired of not loving you"

Blue Velvet by Lana Del Rey ("Ours a love I held tightly; Feeling the rapture grow; Like a flame burning brightly; But when she left; Gone was the glow")

Nothing's Gonna Hurt You, Baby by Cigarettes After Sex ("Whispered something in your ear; It was a perverted thing to say; But I said it anyway; Made you smile and look away; Nothing's gonna hurt you, baby; As long as you're with me, you'll be just fine")

GROUP 2

Cards: 9 of Pentacles, 2 of Pentacles, 7 of Cups, Noose rx, Mushrooms, The Snake, Hammer rx, Seraphim Seraphisa rx.

You will forever be in my heart and mind, but we can never be together in the way we want. There are way too many blockages and I do think we are not fit to be in a relationship. I am in a committed relationship (or you are) and I do not wish to leave her for I love her. Maybe I am a coward, but I am a practical and cautious one. I will not take reckless actions just to wake up one day and regret it. I think what we have is a fantasy, pleasant make-believe, daydreaming. However, I don't want you gone because you're an important person to me. I wish you happiness but I can't follow you.

SONGS:

Lonesome Love by Mitski ("I call you, to see you again; So I can win, and this can finally end")

Blue Banisters by Lana Del Rey ("She said, "You can't be a muse and be happy, too; You can't blacken the pages with Russian poetry and be happy"; And that scared me; 'Cause I met a man who said he'd come back every May;Just to help me if I'd paint; Now when weather turns to May; All my sisters come to paint")

Flash by Cigarettes After Sex ("I'm a flash; You were blinded by the love I had; I'm a flash; The light could only get in through the cracks")

GROUP 3

Cards: The Hierophant rx, 8 of Wands, The Devil, 10 of Swords rx, Wildflowers, Mirror, Keys on a Ring, Archangel Raphael.

You are the temptation, the chaos in my life, the wildflowers that can still be growing but can also be already taken by someone else while I wasn't looking. You're untouchable, unable to be caught, translucent. One minute you're here only to leave seconds later just to come back and stay for a long time. You're unpredictable, a sin worth sinning for. But I hate to be alone and you make me sad. I love to see you but I hate myself when you leave. I don't know if you have any feelings for me; is it something serious or is it just casual and convenient? I can't do this anymore, I'm trapped and I feel miserable. I wish I could tell you to stay away, to abandon me, to never come back. It would be easier for me to move on then but I am a fool for you. I wish I was strong enough to talk things through but I'd rather have some of you than none of you. Then again, being with you hurts me so what should I do?

SONGS:

Should've Been Me by Mitski ("Relive all the ways you still want me; I haven't given you what you need; You wanted me but couldn't reach me; I'm sorry it should've been me"

Blue Jeans by Lana Del Rey ("I will love you till the end of time; I would wait a million years; Promise you'll remember that you're mine; Baby, can you see through the tears?; You went out every night; And, baby, that's alright; But when you walked out that door; A piece of me died")

Ambien Slide by Cigarettes After Sex ("Take my love with some pretend; You said you couldn't help it; Had everything that you wanted; When my love was something yours; But now you're feeling helpless")

GROUP 4

Cards: Death, Page of Pentacles rx, The Chariot rx, Archangel Sammael, Eileen Chang rx, Boat rx, Engagement Ring rx.

I don't want to try to fix this thing between us anymore, it's a fool's errand. We tried and it didn't work, it's time to move on to something else because we are just wasting our time and I'm exhausted. Let me go. Let me leave, peacefully. I don't want to fight but I'm frustrated. I think we tried to escape the inevitable but at the end of the road, we cannot pretend any longer. Relieve me of this burden and don't resent me.

SONGS:

Working For The Knife by Mitski ("I always thought the choice was mine; And I was right, but I just chose wrong")

Bel Air by Lana Del Rey ("Gargoyles standing at the front of your gate; Trying to tell me to wait; But I can't wait to see you; So I run, like I'm mad, to heaven's door; I don't wanna be bad; I won't cheat you no more")

Tejano Blue by Cigarettes After Sex ("We wanted to fuck with real love; Wanted it sweet, so pure and warm; And when you say you want it all, I know you want it all; Baby, take it all from me; I always will make it feel like you were the last one; So get in the waves like it was the first time")

GROUP 5

Cards: The Star rx, 7 of Pentacles, 10 of Swords rx, Glove rx, The Phoenix, Paradise rx, Archangel Haniel.

I wish we could start anew, without any bitter history between us that holds us back and clouds our judgment. We cannot fully be together while all these thoughts are troubling us, making us suspicious of each other and insecure. I know we both lost hope for this connection, yet we are still going and proceeding with it in any way we can. We don't want this to be over but we need to find a solution. I want you in my life and I'm willing to put work into it. Are you? Someone needs to make the first step though and it's the most difficult thing to do. We cannot stay still for much longer though. We communicate telepathically but we also have to communicate in real life.

SONGS:

First Love/Late Spring by Mitski ("Please hurry leave me; I can't breathe; Please don't say you love me; One word from you and I would; Jump off of this ledge I'm on; Tell me "don't" so I can crawl back in")

Video Games by Lana Del Rey ("It's you, it's you, it's all for you; Everything I do; I tell you all the time; Heaven is a place on earth with you; Tell me all the things you wanna do; It's better than I ever even knew; They say that the world was built for two; Only worth living if somebody is loving you")

Goodbye Mr Blue by Father John Misty (" But maybe if he'd gone sooner; Could've brought us back together last June; When the last time was our last time; If only then I knew; The last time was our last time; Would've told you that the last time comes too soon")

GROUP 6

Cards: Page of Swords rx, 9 of Cups rx, 4 of Swords, Sappho, Archangel Chamuel, Cupid's Arrow rx, Separation rx.

Do you love me? You say you do why does your love cause so much pain? Why am I in agony instead of being elated and happy? Is this how you show your love? I feel neglected and manipulated. I feel ignored and mocked. Am I your partner or your pet? Do you even care what I want? Do you care what I have to say? You treat me as a child as if I cannot think or decide for myself. Do you think I'm stupid? Do you think so lowly of me? When you're not here, I don't miss you and my mind is at ease. I lost all hope for anything to change. It hurts even more because I love you, but your love is weird and dysfunctional. I feel trapped. I even stopped speaking my mind because it was met with ridicule and anger.

SONGS:

Wife by Mitski ("For if I am not yours, what am I?; I daydream I'd give one a name of my own; For even I am on loan; For even mine is unknown; So let me go towards the morning star; With hope it won't disappear;)

Carmen by Lana Del Rey ("Baby's all dressed up, with nowhere to go; That's the little story of the girl you know; Relyin' on the kindness of strangers; Darlin', darlin', doesn't have a problem; Lyin' to herself, 'cause her liquor's top shelf; It's alarmin', honestly, how charmin' she can be; Foolin' everyone, tellin' 'em she's havin' fun")

Hot by Cigarettes After Sex ("Is it all in my head? 'Cause I keep getting scared; That I'll always be lost forever; But I don't give a shit if I'm too delicate; When you hold me, it's always better")

[backinmyphase]

Not my honeymoon

Synopsis: A household of an arranged marriage with Gojo Satoru wasn't easy. And as the pressure from the higher ups was becoming more and more there was something to discuss. Your honeymoon.

Or: Satoru Gojo doesn't even know how attached he will grow to his wife yet.

Pairing: Gojo x reader, 3000 words

Not really satisfied with this but I hope you enjoy!

Series Masterlist!

"Are you okay, Gojo?"

No, he was definitely not. He wasn't since all of this started. Since he was destined to marry you. But now as he looked at you it was a different kind of not okay.

What did he do???

You looked sad, no, devastated. Ever since you two ate breakfast together every morning, he thought you would look more relaxed. Maybe even comfortable.

But you seemed to put up a barrier everytime he asked something. And then there was the name.

You still called him Gojo. Even though you were now named the same.

You so carefully kept your distance and you had this sad look in your eyes.

He was worried.

"Yeah, of course." he returned to eating his breakfast. After a bit of silence he opened his mouth again and was surprised he could speak.

"Are you? You look tense."

Your body tensed up again as you looked at him and he wanted to punch himself. He made you uncomfortable, didn't he?

"I am, no worries." you didn't raise your head.

Where did his confidence go? His charisma? His social skills?

Something about his wife made all these so important and natural things dissappear.

The silence spoke loud and the sounds of the eating didn't cover enough of it.

This silence wasn't unusual. In fact it was almost always there when you ate breakfast together. So all the time you saw each other.

And no, he didn't like it. For some reason, on which Satoru couldn't put his finger on, he desperately wanted to know you. He wanted to make peace with you, maybe even be friends with you.

But you seemed so untouchable, he couldn't describe it.

"Well…" Satoru cringed at the sound of his voice. "I have to go to work now."

He stood up and made his way to the door where he made himself ready. "See you later. Have a nice da-"

"Wait, Gojo." Your voice sounded so hesitant, it scared him. "Can we talk later?"

As he looked at you, his whole mind went blank. He felt like he was gonna die. Why did you look at him like that? What did you wanna talk about? Why not now?

"Sure, I can try to come home earlier." He tried to keep his voice steady, but his whole strongest being was shaking in fear.

"Great." you nodded with a neutral look that did NOT scream 'Great'. "Then have a good day at work."

"Thank you, you have a nice day too."

He was going to die, wasn't he?

~

"You look like a corpse." Suguru was always soo considerate.

Satoru sighed as he sat down next to his friend. "Just give me the missions."

His best friend raised an eyebrow. "You know, you should attend the meetings for a change. I'm not always gonna be able to get your missions for you."

"Yeah, you are right Suguru, what would I ever do without you? You are such a good friend." Satoru yawned as he waved his hand.

"Would you please be so kind and enlighten me where I have to be today?"

"I'm going to overlook that sarcasm for today." Suguru handed him a piece of paper. "Here's the list for today."

As Satoru looked at the very long list in horror, Suguru spoke again. "But for real, you look terrible. I thought things were going fine in your marriage?"

"Of course they want me working overtime today." Satoru groaned. "I swear one day I will make all of the higher ups-"

"Satoru, what's wrong?"

He stopped in his rant and sighed. "She wants to talk."

Suguru raised his eyebrow again. "And that's bad, why exactly?"

"Because she always looks like I killed her pet or something like that!" Satoru whined and looked at his paper.

"She doesn't like me."

Suguru shrugged with his shoulders. "I mean, you still didn't apologize."

As Satoru didn't say anything, Suguru continued. "And you also don't really talk to her. How can you expect her to like you yet?"

"Yeah, yeah, you're right." Satoru whispered. Holding his list up, he begged Suguru. "Can you take some of my missions? Please?"

Shacking his head, suguru laughed. "That one time was an exception, I had to work three days in a row for that Satoru. I'm sorry but I have lots of missions too. It's the season."

Satoru just nodded. He had seen this coming.

30 missions in only 12 hours?

It would be a challenge. And it would cause him a little trouble.

But would he give up?

He smiled to himself.

~

You didn't have any time anymore.

The letters of your mother became overbearing, asking where you and Gojo will go for your honeymoon. Asking, that you have surely talked with him about it?

No, you didn't. In fact you were too nervous to even look at him.

You were relieved that he didn't seem to despise you, since he and you ate together now. But he also didn't talk to you and that made you question yourself.

Did he even want to talk?

You needed more time. So much more time. How could they all expect, that you could just sleep with him?

No that just was absurd.

"Mrs. Gojo? How are you feeling today?"

Hina really liked you over the time. Her smile somehow made all of this a bit lighter.

How could you survive a week without her? Just with your husband and the pressure to do something?

"Alright. How are you feeling?" you smiled back, trying to hide your nervousness.

"Perfect, like always." She answered right away, bowing a bit. "Would you like a snack?"

You chuckled a bit. "I can get myself a snack, Hina, you really don't have to."

She shook her head. "Nonsense, it is my job to make you food." She smiled at you knowingly. "And I also get paid for it."

You laughed a bit. "Well, I think my husband will keep paying you even when you make me a snack less."

"If you think so Mrs. Gojo." she made a little curtsy and laughed as she went into the kitchen.

You smiled to yourself as you looked after her. You would miss her on your honeymoon.

Oh god the honeymoon…

~

"Could you please just die?!" Gojo was annoyed as fuck as the curse before him just kept sneaking into barriers and hiding from him.

Normally he wouldn't be this mad.

But he had to be home in time today. And as the curse escaped a crazy laugh at him his anger only rose.

His finger twitched. He wanted to just open his domain and make puddle of this pathetic being. But there were still people near and it would be a bit overkill.

So he had to work with red and blue.

And he had to be fast.

"Gojo Satoruuuhuuuuuu." the distorted voice of the curse spoke underneath him. So smugly, that Satoru felt like laughing.

"Found you."

Hollow purple.

As the cursed energy of the curse slowly disappeared Satoru looked at his list. Still 4 curses in 4 locations. And only 30 minutes till 9 pm.

He had to be faster. Before you would think he didn't care.

If there was just one more stupid barrier, he swore he would-

Goddammit.

~

It was almost 8:51 as you thought you should just eat and go to sleep.

Maybe you would find the courage to talk to him tomorrow too and everything would be fine.

Maybe.

"Should we serve dinner, Mrs. Gojo?" Hina looked at you and waited patiently for your answer.

And as you looked at her something in you switched.

"Wait. My husband isn't home yet, we will wait for him."

Hina chuckled and nodded. She smiled knowingly as she went into the kitchen.

You looked at the clock. 8:56 pm.

You sighed as you sat there. Playing with your glass, you wondered.

Would Gojo even want a honeymoon?

If he didn't, that would be a problem. The higher ups were persistent of you two going somewhere in japan to have 'enough time'.

Your glass seemed to shake, nerarly breaking.

What would you do? What would you tell them? What, what, what-

Forcefully the door opened and Gojo stood there.

A Gojo stained with blood, his blindfold pulled down, looking at you with big eyes.

"What did you want to talk-"

"Why are you bloody-"

You talked at the same time, looking confused at each other. You waited for an answer, as he looked at you confused.

"What do you mean, bloody?" he looked down. Then his eyes widened and he chuckled. "Oh, you don't have to worry, it's not mine."

What did he mean 'don't worry'? He looked like he was out of a horror movie!

Perplexed you looked at him. "Is this all from the curses-?"

"Anyway you wanted to talk?" only now he closed the door behind him.

You blinked at him. Two times. Three times. Then you looked down. "Yeah. But if you are to tired, we can also talk tomorrow -" or the day after, or the day after that day, or…

"I'm not too tired, don't worry." He looked behind you at the empty table. "Did you already eat?"

Just as you wanted to answer, Hina stepped in and took the opportunity to speak. "Mrs. Gojo, now that Mr. Gojo is here, should we serve the food?"

You looked at her and just nodded.

"Well, then." Gojo clapped one time. "We can talk as we eat, right? Then let's sit down."

He took your chair and you wanted to ask what he wanted to do, as he pulled it and offered you the seat. You just sat down and muttered a small thanks.

He smiled, he smiled?, and went to his seat on the opposite side of the table looking at you full of expectation.

Your mind was blank. All the words you so carefully constructed to sentences were all gone. The only thing in your head was the question:

What if Gojo didn't want a honeymoon?

"You waited for me to eat?"

You looked up to Gojo and he smiled at you again. Since when was he so talkative??

"Yeah, I did."

Your voice was much more quiet as you wanted. But he didn't seem to mind as he looked at you with that sparkle in his eyes.

Or maybe his eyes always looked like that.

"Thank you. But you don't have to do that. Most of the time I work much too long for you to stay up and not eat."

"Well, maybe we could still eat dinner together sometimes."

Your mouth spoke without your permission and his widening smile made your head dizzy.

"Your food. We hope you enjoy your meal." Hina placed dinner onto the table bowed a bit and then went into the kitchen as fast as she could.

"Soooooo." Gojo looked down at his food. "What did you wanna talk about?"

"Well…" you stopped, weighing your options of what you could say. Oh, just say it. "I wanted to discuss your honeymoon."

As you looked up you saw two big blue eyes blinking at you. "Our honeymoon? Ohhhhhhhhhhhh"

His shoulders visibly starting to relax as he sighed of relief. A smile forming on his lips again. "Whew, I thought I did something wrong. You had me scared, you know."

"I had you scared?" you looked at him in disbelief. "You came in like a madman covered in blood!"

"Oh, trust me." Gojo leaned back. "That's not nearly as terrifying as my wife, when she is angry at me. She can get really mad, you know?"

You couldn't hide the disbelief in your face and just shook your head. But slowly a smile was forming on your lips. "You're stupid."

Satoru chuckled again and took a bite of the food. Then he looked at you again. "Yeah, yeah. But back to the topic."

Leaning a bit forward, he raised an eyebrow. "Where do you want to go for our honeymoon?"

His voice sounded so casually you felt dumb. "Oh, I don't know. I wanted to ask you."

He tilted his head. "Do you even want to have a honeymoon?"

"What-" panic flooded you as you thought about the higher ups. "Of course!"

"If you say so." he didn't seem convinced but nodded. "But there has to be a place you always wanted to go."

You shook your head. "No, not really. You can decide."

His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward. "Is there no country you ever wanted to go to?"

"No!" you spoke so fast, you couldn't stop yourself from your panic taking over. "I mean- I would like to be in Japan."

He kept silent as he inspected you. And then he sighed. "I have nothing against it, if that's what you want. But you seem so on edge."

You looked down. "Sorry. This…" your throat tightens but you manage to say the words in your mind. "It's just very important."

He blinked at you again and then smiled so softly, you didn't know Satoru could even look at you like that. "It's okay, but if you are too focused on making it perfect, it sabotages itself, doesn't it?"

You couldn't bear his words. The voice of your mother played so loudly in your right ear.

Be a good wife. Be a good wife. Be a good wife be a good wife beagoodwife-

"Would you like to go to a quiet place?" Satoru chuckled to himself. "I wouldn't say no to it."

He looked so sincere. Never before had he talked to you like that. Of course you did have some small talk about his day and what you read the last day, but he seemed so relaxed and like himself right now.

Was this the charismatic Gojo Satoru so many people told you about?

"I would like that." you whispered.

"Hina?" His gaze focused on the girl who quickly emerged from the kitchen. "You and your grandma lived in Shirahama, didn't you?"

She nodded quickly and smiled. "Yes, it's nice there. A bit of the ocean to see and plenty of nature."

She looked at you expectantly. "It's really relaxing, Mrs. Gojo."

Somehow, her shy look made you smile too. "Well, we'll have to go and see it then."

Hina smiled at you with sparkling eyes and bowed a bit again. "You won't regret it!"

"Definitely not!" Satoru laughed a bit. "Then that's settled."

"What-" he looked at his food and continued eating without a care in the world. How could he just carelessly think that that was it?

"But we still have to discuss everything with the higher-ups!"

The atmosphere became much colder along with his gaze. He had stopped eating and his gaze pierced you.

His figure suddenly sitting up straight, his arms to the side, he raised his head.

"Why should I discuss our honeymoon with them?"

The words were caught up in your throat.

You looked down at your food and tried to justify your silence by eating.

"Did you just want to talk to me because of them?" his voice was so much colder than it had been seconds before.

You frantically swallowed your food. "No, I… It wasn't that, really!"

The lies were hard to get off your lips. But he couldn't know about the meetings, no, he simply couldn't!

He was silent. His gaze was lowered and you could no longer see his beautiful blue eyes.

"I wanted to… Get to know you better. We hardly know each other." You pointed to the food table.

"I think it's good that we're eating together now, but that hardly adds anything. I just wanted… For us to have more time together."

When he still didn't say anything, you lowered your head too. "It's just… I thought we still had to organize everything with them? Because of your work and clan duties?"

Gojo chuckled and you heard him looking up. "As if they could fight back. We can just leave."

His voice halled through the room. "And we will tomorrow."

"What?" Shocked, you looked at him. "You can't be serious, can you?"

A huge grin was forming on his face. "You still have to learn how serious I can be. We're leaving tomorrow."

He pulled out his cell phone and typed something. "One of my clan employees will arrange our trip."

"Gojo, we can't just leave!"

"Why not?" he looked deep into your eyes. "Why can't we just say 'fuck them'?"

You shook your head. "Maybe you could, Gojo, but not me! I would disgrace my clan!"

Gojo stood up abruptly. "This is our honeymoon! Your honeymoon! What they think doesn't matter! You're my wife now, those bastards have to respect you! Understand that!"

"It's not that simple." You could only whisper.

He shook his head. "Nevertheless let's go tomorrow. I'll write a letter to your mother and explain that I just took you with me."

He approached your seat. "You wouldn't be to blame."

As if she would think it wasn't your fault. They'd all curse you because then they wouldn't know where you two even were.

But wasn't that what you wanted?

"I'm going to sleep." Determined, you headed for your room. You needed to clear your thoughts.

"We can talk about it again in the morning. And maybe go straight away." He followed you to your door.

"There would be consequences." Something in your voice trembled. "Just running off like that."

And as you stood there, your door to your room already in your hand, he stepped right behind you. His body closer than ever.

Shouldn't Infinity be pushing you back? Why could you feel his warmth, almost feel his breath?

"I could handle that." His hand now held your door.

"I want to get to know you better too."

With that, he let go of your door and left you standing in the hallway, confused.

Taglist:

@zoeyflower @bubera974 @ssetsuka @lady-of-blossoms @peqch-pie

@karlaolea @slut-for-fictional-men @tnt-kokoo @gojoscumslut @sillyfreakfanparty

@tbzzluvr

@emi311 @the-number7 @o-ikawaii @doodle-cat16 @yozora7154

@levisfavoriteteashop @roscpctals99 @starlightglimmersworld @manyuyuu

@dahliawarner @aliisinwonderland @lov3vivian @inthedarkshadows000

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@sanriosatoru @kimsrie @444na0m1 @humongousdreamlandbear

@elitesanjisimp @dummyf @elernity

@s4ikooo1 @roseyposeylemonsquozey @shitforbrainsmal

@mo0nforme @local-mr-frog @blkmystery

[worriedvision]

Ajaw ruins his relationship with you - Kinich

Gender neutral reader, angst. No happy ending here, borderline crack BC Ajaw is a cracky character let's be honest. Ajaws a little shit here

--

Kinich had, somehow, caught your eye enough for you to successfully land a date with him. One date becomes two, and the third one ends in you inviting him over for a drink. He accepts, and before you know it your home becomes a place for him to call home as well. While Kinich wasn't very emotive, he seemed to smile just a bit around you.

However, the couple affections you would expect from him in a relationship weren't coming. Nothing like kissing or hugging, and for a while you think it's because Kinich was not a touchy person. You also knew he was very busy with his work, which was why the first few times he left and told you not to wait for him you didn't think much. At the time, in fact, you were more attracted to him because he was honest with you.

"Don't wait up." He blankly states, every morning he leaves. If you're lucky, he comes back at night time only to sleep - he doesn't make himself any food or drink from your home.

You got suspicious of him when you were hanging out with Mualani, and she brought up the fact someone called Ajaw wouldn't stop nagging at Kinich. When you ask who Ajaw was, rather if this was his boss, Mualani laughs.

"Ajaw probably thinks so, but they bickering too often to do any work together." Mualani tuts. "Do you never hear Ajaw? That voice is so... Annoying to hear!"

"No...I've never met this Ajaw." You hum out, Mualani gasping.

"Tell me your tricks!"

--

Once you get home from your interaction with your friend, you've had enough time to think. After some long thinking, you come to a decision. You move the stuff that's Kinich's, leaving them by the front door, and add temporary locks in addition to the one your key locks until you can change the lock.

To your surprise, Kinich sounds surprised when he notices his bags out. You refuse to open the door, having more than enough time to waste as you had a day off, and Kinich defeatedly picks up his few belongings before leaving.

--

"Hah! You should see your face!" Ajaw jeers, Mualani and Kinich groaning out at Ajaws harsh words. "Good thing _ wisened up and realised they can do a lot better than some mortal being that can't even get himself a group of companions!"

"Because you always ruin things." Mualani sighs.

"Hey, I can't take credit for this one! I never even once spoke around _!" Ajaw shrugs, putting some sunglasses on.

"I was hoping to finally get to spend some time with them. I've finally got enough cover for a few days." Kinich states, seeming to realise what Ajaw did. "...Mualani, you know how annoying Ajaw is. Do you know if -"

"Oddly enough no! Honestly, I'm jealous. Ajaw doesn't know when to shut up."

"...It seems they do." Kinich massages his temples, Mualani making eye contact with him.

"...Do you think they were suspicious you were seeing Ajaw? Yuck!"

"Hey, I can hear you, ya know?!"

"It makes sense though. They don't know Ajaw isn't even human, and also isn't mortal."

"Hahaha! Oh boy, even I didn't think keeping my mouth shut around your potential love interests would give this benefit!" Ajaw cackles, seeing Kinich's hand flying towards him. "Hey, what are - AHH!"

--

You keep getting asked if Kinich is single, each time you saying he wasn't seeing you anymore before they seem excited to pursue a taken man. It's quite concerning, really, you think theres little dignity in being the other person in the relationship.

Kinich tried to talk to you, but each time you saw him you'd make an excuse for being too busy before hearing some weird child cackling and screaming in retaliation to someone reacting to them. As much as his hurt expression spoke to you, you still knew in your mind that Kinich was in a relationship.

Even if he wasn't, you would know in your mind that you were the second choice.

[cosmonauter]

ahh, i hope you like it @liv-does-stuff !!

bestfriend james who has no boundaries with you!!

james potter thinks you are the best friend he's ever had. normally people tell him that he's too clingy, and they don't like him hanging around them all the time. and it's not a problem for him, but he just wants someone to let him hug and touch without being awkward about it.

so when you two met, he felt like the luckiest person on earth because you don't think it's weird when he hugs you from behind and kisses the top of your head.

you don't judge him for demanding cuddles and sleepovers at least two times a week. you even encourage him to be touchier!

his favourite thing to do with you is bathing together. since he's a headboy, he has unlimited access to the prefect's bathroom, which means that the two of you bathe together as often as possible.

he's especially excited to meet you today because he was informed about a new couple in school, and he really wants to gossip about it with you!

so while he is cleaning his bed of sirius' socks and peter's sweets, because you're sleeping over today, sirius decides to ask him a question, "are you meeting up with them again? don't you think it's a little weird that you guys bath at the same time in the same room, even though you're 'just friends'?"

"why would it be weird? they wash my back and i condition their hair for them. it's logical and they don't mind it aswell. it's actually really nice, and besides, don't act as if remus and you don't shower together!"

remus sighs, "james, sirius and i are in a relationship with eachother. aside from that, i totally agree with pads, it is weird that you take baths together. what's even weirder is you touching while being in said bath!"

"you guys just don't have the connection that my dove and i have. it's okay though, don't be sad about it! maybe one day you'll reach the same trust we have in each other.", james throws a towel over one shoulder and picks out a shirt for you to wear, and matching pants, so everyone you come across in the halls knows about your superior friendship (and that you're his, but he wouldn't admit that to anyone, not even under torture).

"i'm going to the bath, padfoot don't eat anything on my bed, my dove complained about the crumbs last time, and i promised them to change that! they're sleeping with me today. bye bye!"

he closes the door before any of them can say anything and runs to the bathroom as fast as he can.

-

as soon as he arrives in the prefect bathroom, he already sees you taking off your clothes.

while you are struggling with unzipping your pants, he comes up behind you and grabs your waist, pulling you into an embrace. your naked back against his broad chest sends electric shocks down his body and he shivers against you and presses your body closer to his.

"jamie, can you help me with my zipper? it isn't moving any further and i can't get out of my pants like that."

james would do anything for you, if you never stopped looking at him with those puppy-eyes, "of course, sweetheart. stay still."

he moves his hand away for a moment to turn your body facing his. while his one hand moves towards your zipper, the other one steadying your body by holding your hip, he grins at you and you smile back up at him.

he tugs a few times, but the pants don't budge. you notice his forehead getting sweatier, so you suggest to "take off your shirt jamie, it's to hot in here for you to be wearing it!" while tugging it up his back a little.

he pulls it off and throws it to the side, giving you a grin, "if you wanted me naked, darling, you just had to ask."

you scrunch your brows together, "if i wanted you naked, you would already be.". he snorts, and keeps tugging at your jeans.

suddenly an idea blossoms in his head. what if your zipper got stuck on something from the inside of your pants. so, of course, he sticks his hand down your pants to find a little string, connected to your underwear, being held hostage by said zipper.

"darling, you just have to pull your trousers down together with your panties. see, just like that..", he slowly eases your trousers over your butt, enjoying the feeling of your body under his hands.

you shiver against him and moan out," thank you, jamie. i should've thought about that." you blush and hide your head in his chest.

"don't worry about it, my love. i'm happy to help you as much as you need.", he smiles down at you, while you start tugging down his zipper to take of his trousers.

as soon as they fall to the floor, james picks you up by your waist and throws you into the water.

" james, you idiot!!", you scream at him while trying to splash him with the water. "i'm sorry, i'm sorry angel! i'll jump in okay? will that make you happy?"

-

"they are definitely fucking, i'm telling you!"

"sirius, calm down! what if they hear you, huh?"

"oh come on remus, they wear matching pajamas and use silencing charms every single time they have a 'sleepover', they won't hear a thing, trust me!"

"you're right, love, but still."

"wormy, what do you think?"

"i think they're both idiots, who really don't get why it's so weird."

please tell me if i need to change something, or if you have some tips on getting better. i hope you enjoyed it :))

[wands-natsthing]

𝐃𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐫𝐞𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐭?

Hellooo this is chapter 2!! I hope you enjoy it. If there's anything you guys would like to see for this little thing please let me know!! Also I will be trying to update this fic at least once a week maybe either on Wednesdays or Thursdays and then posting a request or something on the weekends. 

Feedback is more than welcomed, pls like and comment I enjoyed sm reading and replying to them and if you would liked to be tagged pls leave a comment

Warings: This is like previous high school student x teachers kinda sorta reader was 18 when that was happening tho no smut yet but will be implied in the future. That’s all i think but if you recognize anymore lemme know pls!! 

Word count: 1.3k 

Summary: You didn’t see Wanda anymore after the cafe incident but you go to the schools open house and see here there and have a talk. (I'm so sorry i'm shit at summaries)

 You didn't see Wanda around anymore after that. School was lingering around the corner, with the hot summer air turning into a cool breeze. You had comfortably settled into your new apartment, adorning it with various fall decorations. 

The open house was coming up in a few days. It was an event filled with eager students and their curious parents about the upcoming school year. Although you weren't required to go because you weren't a teacher, you wanted to. You needed to know if Wanda still worked there.

Technically, you could check the school's website and browse through the staff directory, but you wanted to see for yourself. You wanted to see with your own eyes whether the classroom still looked straight out of a Pinterest board. If the fairy lights you both had hung during a shared lunch still twinkled from the ceiling, if her favorite cinnamon and vanilla-scented candle still filled the room with its soothing aroma?

You wondered if her teaching methods had changed. Had the years hardened her patience, or did she repeat herself as often as needed? Did she still listen more than she spoke, or did she talk over students? Did her words continue to carry the same weight as they did all those years ago? Would they still keep you awake at night pondering over what she said? 

You had so many questions you wanted answers to, but simultaneously, you were afraid to know the answers. What would you do if everything had changed? What if this wasn't the same Wanda from five years ago? Physically, she looked the same, but what would that matter if she had changed from within? 

Realistically, you knew that asking her to stay exactly the same was impossible. A lot can change in five years. You should know you have grown a lot yourself, but that didn't mean you liked it. 

And who was that woman? 

You asked yourself this question for weeks after seeing her that day in the cafe, constantly fighting the urge to try and stalk her. It's not like you could, anyway. You didn't even know her name, let alone what she looked like, as her back was facing you, but that didn't stop you from obsessing over her. 

Were they together? Were they married? How did they meet? When did they meet? Was it long after you left, or did she move on quickly, and your shared turkey and cheese sandwiches didn't mean as much as you thought? 

There were just so many questions. 

The day of the open house had arrived. You sat in your car, staring at the familiarity of high school. From the outside, it looked exactly the same, with the red and blue colored letters spelling out "Go Ravens!!"

Your heart pounded in your chest as you observed the array of cars in the parking lot, heightening your anxiety. You contemplated the idea of simply driving back home, but just the possibility of seeing Wanda again was too irresistible to resist. 

The clock was ticking, and with each passing moment, your dread only seemed to grow. 

How would she react upon seeing me again? 

Would the awkwardness be palpable, or would she greet me with the same warm smile she did in the cafe? 

And what about me? How was I supposed to act around her? I certainly had to do better than last time. 

Taking a deep breath, you force yourself out of the car. The walk to the entrance felt longer than it was; each step was heavy with hesitation. You thought about the day she saved you as you entered the hallways filled with eager parents and students. The noise seemed to fade into the background as you made your way to where her classroom used to be. Your usual fast-paced walk is now turning into you dragging your feet. 

Before you even turned the corner, you heard the same laugh you did in the cafe with another voice. Your heart skipped a beat. Without thinking another thought, you turned the corner. 

There she was, Wanda, standing outside her classroom wearing black slacks and a white long-sleeved ribbed shirt tucked into them. Her hair was lightly curled down her back, and her feet adorned a pair of black loafers. 

She was engaged in conversation with a parent, and her passion for teaching was evident in how she used her hands to talk and the sparkle in her eyes. You hesitated, not wanting to interrupt but unable to pull yourself away. The parent soon left, nodding and offering a polite goodbye. 

As they moved, you saw her again, the redhead from the cafe. 

What was she doing here?  

She was leaning against the doorframe, a soft smile on her lips as she watched Wanda interact with the parent. 

Your eyes met. She turned to tap Wanda to get her attention and pointed at you. You stood there awkwardly, unsure of how to approach her. 

When she looked at you, the recognition on her face was immediate, and a warm, genuine smile spread across her face. "It's been a long time," she said softly while grabbing at your hands, using the same soft tone she had last spoken to you on graduation day.  

"Yeah, it has. Too long," you replied, the weight of the years settling between you both. You stood there for a moment, staring before you were brought back by the sound of the woman's voice that was standing next to her.

"Hey, Wanda, I can take over here for a while if you guys want to catch up."

"Are you sure? I mean, I know it's a little busy, " she asked, looking around at all the parents and students.  

"Yes, go. I'll be fine here; I can handle it, " the red-headed woman reassured her while pushing her farther in your direction. 

"Okay, then let's go somewhere less crowded," Wanda said while leading you away. 

As you walked to a quieter area, neither of you said a word. The silence wasn't necessarily awkward, but it wasn't comfortable either. Inside, you were freaking out. 

What were you going to say? What if she told you to leave and that she never wanted to see you again?

It wasn't like you could fulfill her request if that's what she wanted. You needed this job; You could not go back home. 

The less crowded place turned out to be a janitor's closet. The smell of dirty mop water and ammonia was prevalent in the air. 

Wanda turned to lock the door. Once inside, you both looked at each other, wondering what to say.

"You look really good, so grown up," she whispers more to herself than to you while taking her left hand to brush a piece of hair behind your ear before hesitating and bringing it back down to her side. 

You noticed that when she brought her hand back to her side, a silver ring with an oval-shaped diamond lay upon her ring finger. Has she gotten married?

"Thank you, so do you. Look really good, I mean," you stutter over yourself.

Wanda blushes with a slight chuckle, "Thank you."

"Of course," you smile.

Tension lingered in the air as both of you had questions but had no idea how to ask them or if you even should.

Wanda is the one to break that tension.

"So, um, not that I'm not super happy to see you because I am, but what are you doing here?"

Excitement swirled inside, hearing that she was happy to see you.

"I, uh, I got a job here as a library media assistant. I will be working in the media center, you know, checking out books and teaching computer programs."

"Really? That's great. You always loved the school library. I remember how you used to beg me to bring the class at least twice a week."

"Yeah, I'm really excited about it."

While you were trying to be present in the conversation, you really had a one-track mind.

"Who's the woman that was standing outside the door with you?" you asked.

You can tell Wanda hadn't been expecting your question by the way her eyes widened.

"Oh um that's Natasha, After you graduated I started teaching a co-taught english class and well she's the co-teacher." She paused before confirming the suspicion you had earlier. 

"She's also my wife…" 

♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎♥︎♡︎

Lemme know whatcha thinkkkk

@nebthetautora @esposadejoyhuerta @w4ndsversew0nder

@skz-xii

[222col]

Reader getting fucked by Patrick with his racket on the open courts at night after a massive fight that ends with duhhh more delicious mean sex

i- yes.

"stop being a fucking pussy." you smack the ball with your racket across the court. you and patrick had been fighting all day. you were hoping a late night session on the courts would get some of your frustrations out, but unfortunately it only made things worse. patrick breathes in sharply, serving the ball back over to you, starting the rally back up. "stop being a brat." he spits, sending the ball flying past you. his words only anger you more, throwing the racket down on the floor as he walks over to the net. "come here." he beckons, you begrudgingly follow his instructions, shuffling over to the net. "turn around." patrick orders, watching his eyes get darker as you look at him. when you don't do as he asks, he walks around the net to stand in front of you. "turn around." patrick spits out his words, smirk forming as you slowly turn around, facing away from him. his hands pushing your back, forcing you to lean over as his racket slaps against the flesh of your ass. the squeal that leaves your lips makes patrick's cock twitch, massaging the flesh before spanking you with the racket again. patrick forces you upright, pulling you up by your shoulders before pulling the fabric of your skirt down your ankles. holding you by your hair as he hits your ass once more. he drops the racket down to the floor as he spins you around to face him. "are you done being a brat now?" he asks you, his jaw clenched. "i'm not being a fucking brat." you spit.

it's seconds before patrick pushes your body down onto the floor, dropping down to his knees as he pulls your panties down your legs. "what are you doing?" you ask him, lip between your teeth. "shut up." he mumbles, picking up his racket and letting globs of spit cover the handle. he has an evil look in his eyes as his fingers push themselves inside you, quiet moans leaving your lips as you sit up on your palms. he adds a third digit before removing them all together, despite your protests. he spits down on the racket once more, before smirking up to you. your jaw drops as patrick pushes the handle inside of you, slipping it in gently before starting to fuck you with it quicker. your head flings back as patrick increases the pace, choking out moans. "such a fucking little slut, aren't you?" he smirks to you, his hands pushing the racket in and out of you. "my dirty little girl, you like this, don't you?" you can see the tent forming in his shorts, his evil smirk, he's getting off on it. your back arched, brows furrowed as he keeps pounding the handle into your cunt. leaning over with his free hand to circle at your clit, hearing the increased volume of your noises. your legs jolt as patrick forces an orgasm from you, an evil chuckle leaving his lips as he does. "naughty, naughty girl."

your head hits the floor as patrick slides the racket out from you, your chest heaving as he stands up before you. "oh, i'm not done with you yet." patrick smirks, pulling you up from the floor onto your feet. he pushes your chest down over the net in the middle of the court, your hands instinctively grabbing hold in a small attempt to steady yourself. your breathing is still heavy as patrick pushes his shorts and boxers down his legs, slapping his cock against your already sensitive sex. groaning as he pushes himself in, grabbing at the flesh of your hips as he fucks himself into you. his hips slapping against your ass, the skin already red as he spanks his open hand against the flesh. the floodlights on the courts highlighting the wire markings on the skin from his racket, only causing more groans from patrick. clenching against him as his body rocks against yours. his nails are digging into your hips, as you grip around the net holding to hold you up. nearly buckling beneath him as his load paints your walls. "fuckkk- good girl." patrick moans, his chest leaning down against your back. holding you there for a minute before sliding out, pulling his shorts back up his legs. he lets you find your panties and skirt before leaning down to kiss the top of your head. "good girl, you did so well."

[lvnleah]

Grumpy game days

part two to the Rory in America series! thank you to @scribblesofagoonerr for help throughout this!

series masterlist can be found here!

August 17th 2024.

When Beth’s alarm went off at six-thirty this morning, you were still fast asleep so she decided to let you sleep in. You’d been in America for two days now and your body was slowly starting to get used to the time change and last night you slept right through for the first time.

Beth took the time she had to take a quick shower and get herself ready for training in the bathroom, careful not to disturb your sleep as she prayed today wouldn’t be another grumpy one. Your grumpiness was yet to disappear.

You weren’t enjoying America one bit, you had to wear suncream all the time and it made your skin sticky. You were constantly tired too and were missing your home comforts like your bedroom and other teddies. You were also missing Viv a lot, you were so used to being with her and Beth that it felt weird not having her around.

When Beth returned to the bedroom, she found you awake, sitting up in bed, and already frowning. The moment you saw her, your little lips pushed out into a pout, and your eyebrows knitted together in frustration.

“Why didn’t ‘ou wake me up?” you grumbled, your voice still thick with sleep.

“You needed some more sleep! We can’t have you tired can we, eh?” Beth smiled, sitting down on the edge of the bed. She reached out and smoothed down your wild bed hair. “Mummy had to get ready and now you need to do the same thing so we can go see all your aunties at training!”

“I don’t wanna go to training,” you muttered, crossing your arms over your chest in defiance.

Beth’s heart sank a little. She knew this trip was difficult for you, being so far away from home, your routine, and Viv. But she also knew how much you’d love it once you were more settled.

“I know, bubs,” Beth replied, keeping her voice soft and calm. “But after training, we’re going to see some cool places, like the big tall monument and the White House! Maybe we can even get some ice cream after.”

But you were having none of it. Your small feet kicked at the covers as you flopped back onto the bed, turning your face away from her. “I don’t care. I don’t wanna go. I wanna go home!” You whined.

Little tears started to fall down your face from how overwhelmed and tired you were feeling. Beth was quick to pull you onto her lap and rub her hand up and down your back as you snuggled into her chest, holding Twix close to you.

“I miss Mamma,” you said in between tears, “I miss Myle too.”

“Oh baby, I know,” Beth said, placing a kiss on your forehead, “Why don’t we give them a FaceTime, huh?”

You sniffled, nodding slightly against her chest. Beth kissed the top of your head before reaching for her phone to call Viv, hoping that hearing her voice might bring a little comfort to you.

As the phone rang, you stayed curled up in Beth's lap, clutching Twix still tightly to your chest. After what felt like forever, the screen lit up with Viv's face. She looked a bit tired, but her eyes lit up the moment she saw you.

"Hey, mijn meisje!" Viv smiled. "Why are you crying, Roo?”

You sniffled again, rubbing your eyes with the back of your hand. "I miss you, Mamma. And I miss Myle too.”

"I miss you too, sweetheart," Viv said gently. "And Myle misses you a whole bunch. But guess what? You’re going to have so much fun today with Mummy and all your aunties. And Myle and I are going to be right here when you come home, okay?"

You hesitated for a moment, biting your lip as you tried to process Viv’s words. "But I don’t like the sun!”

Viv smiled, her expression filled with love and patience. "Mummy knows and she’ll make sure you’re okay. You know she will. But how about you try to have fun first? You might see something really cool today that you can tell me all about later. I want to hear all about it, okay?"

Your tears had slowed, "Okay… I guess.”

Viv chuckled softly. “I’ll be waiting for you when I’m back from Australia with the biggest hugs and all the kisses. And maybe even a surprise.”

You perked up slightly at the mention of a surprise. "A surprise? What kind?"

Viv laughed. "Well, it wouldn’t be a surprise if I told you, now would it? You’ll just have to wait and see."

Beth, who had been watching the exchange, smiled softly at how Viv managed to calm you down with just a few words. She mouthed a "thank you" to Viv, who winked in response.

"Alright, bubs," Beth said, gently stroking your hair. "Why don’t we get you ready now? And maybe while you’re getting dressed, you can think about what you want to tell Mamma about your big day, okay?"

You nodded, feeling a bit better after talking to Viv. "Okay, Mummy."

"That’s my girl," Viv praised. "And remember, you can call me anytime you want. I’m always here, okay?"

"Okay, Mamma. I love you," you said, your voice small.

"I love you more," Viv replied. "Now go have some fun today, alright?"

With a final wave, Beth ended the call and turned her attention back to you. You looked up at her, still a bit hesitant but willing to try.

"Come on, sweetie," Beth said softly. "Let’s get you ready for the day. How about you wear your dungarees?”

“Dungarees!” You cheered, slowly sliding off Beth's lap. “Can Twix match?”

“Of course, he can!” Beth smiled, “Why don’t we get you ready then we’ll get his suitcase out and pick an outfit out for him, yeah?”

You nodded your head in agreement before picking out your dungarees from your wardrobe that had all of the outfits you’d picked out before you came. Beth helped you get dressed into them because you hadn’t quite figured them out yet before taking you into the bathroom to do your hair.

Beth carefully braided your hair, her fingers working quickly and gently to create the perfect "Elsa braid" that you loved so much. She smiled to herself as she watched you in the mirror, noticing how your mood seemed to be improving with every small act of care. Once your hair was done, she gave you a little spin in front of the mirror, and your face lit up with a shy smile.

“Can I bring Twix with me?" you asked, holding your teddy bear close to your chest.

"Of course, you can," Beth replied, picking up your tiny matching dungarees for Twix. "Let’s get him dressed too, and then we’ll be all set to go."

Once Twix was dressed and safely tucked under your arm, Beth took your hand and led you out of the hotel room. As you walked down the hallway, you spotted Step waiting for you in the lobby.

"Hey, Roo!" Steph smiled, crouching down to your level. "Ready to have some fun today?"

“I spoke to Mamma this morning!” You smiled, not caring or acknowledging her question.

Steph gasped, “You did?! I’m so happy for you, Roo! Are you ready to explore a little?”

“Yeah!” You nodded your head excitedly, still holding Beth’s hand, “Mummy says she has to train first though…”

Beth laughed, “That’s exactly how I feel about it too, Roo. It won’t be long but you’ll get to draw and play with Buddy!”

You perked up a little at the mention of your little cousin Buddy, who was your Auntie Leah’s daughter. You knew time would pass with the both of you colouring and possibly stealing a football to play with. You also knew that Monkey and Kyra would somehow get roped in and keep you both entertained.

With your hand in Beth’s, you made your way down to the coach as you chatted Steph’s ear off about the recent drawing you’d made for Viv. The coach ride to training passed quickly and before you knew it you were set up on the sidelines in the shade with a colouring book and Buddy beside you.

As Beth jogged onto the training pitch with her teammates, she couldn't help but glance back at you and Buddy sitting comfortably in the shade. You were both absorbed in your colouring books, with Monkey and Kyra sitting next to you.

Training started with the usual drills, but Beth's focus kept drifting back to you. Now and then, she'd catch sight of you showing Kyra your latest masterpiece, and she'd see her head nodding seriously in response. It brought a soft smile to her face.

As the session went on, Beth could feel the heat creeping up on everyone. She knew you’d start to feel uncomfortable soon. Training was soon over and after everyone was freshened up you all gathered onto the coach.

You ended up at a place called the Washington Memorials, or at least that’s what Beth had told you. Beth had made sure that your hand was tightly holding hers at all times and your other one was clutching Twix as you walked in between her and Steph.

“Look at the big building, Roo!” Steph gasped, kneeling down beside you as she pointed in front of you. “Do you know the name of it?”

You shook your head, “That’s the Washington Monument! Isn’t it big?” She explained.

“Sooo big!” You nodded, “What’s that over there?” You asked, turning around and pointing to a big white statue of a man in a big building.

“That’s Abraham Lincoln, he was the president!” Beth explained, “Isn’t it big?”

You nodded, “Woahh! Yeah, can I get a statue like that? That’s so cool!”

Beth laughed, shaking her head, “You have to do something special to get a statue like that, Roo.”

After taking some pictures, including one with Twix posing in front of the monument, you continued your walk around the National Mall. You were starting to get tired again, the sun was starting to make you feel all sticky.

As the sun beat down, you began to fidget more, tugging at your shirt and rubbing your eyes. The excitement from earlier was quickly fading, replaced by the discomfort that had been creeping up on you. Your hand started to slip from Beth’s as you dragged your feet along the path.

Beth noticed immediately as she crouched down in front of you. “Are you okay, Roo?” she asked softly, brushing a strand of hair from your forehead.

You shook your head, your lower lip jutting out in a familiar pout. “It’s too hot, Mummy,” you mumbled, clinging tighter to Twix. “I wanna go back to the coach.”

Beth sighed, she had hoped the outing would be a nice distraction, but she knew how easily overwhelmed you could get in the sun. “Okay, sweetie. Let’s go back to the coach.”

Steph, who had been walking with you, turned around to see what was going on. “Everything alright?” she asked, concern evident in her voice.

Beth nodded. “I think Roo’s had enough for today. We’re going to head back to the coach.”

Steph gave you a sympathetic smile, “I get it, Roo. It’s super hot out here, huh? Why don’t I tell Jonas and the team then come back with you?”

“Are you sure?” Beth said, “We'll be fine if you want to see some more bits.”

Steph shrugged, “I’m finding it pretty boring if I’m honest, can have my favourite little person bored now, can we? How about I carry you back so your Mummy gets a break?”

You didn’t hesitate to nod, reaching your arms out to Steph. She quickly scooped you up, and you buried your face into her shoulder, already feeling a bit more comforted being held. You stood with Steph for a bit while Beth quickly filled Jonas in on where they were going.

“Steph Catley, the personal carrier!” Beth laughed as she returned, “Saves my arms at least! He said it’s fine, let’s head back, yeah?”

Beth followed closely, her hand resting on your back as you made your way through the crowd. She could see the exhaustion in your little face and knew that cutting the visit short was the best decision.

When you finally reached the coach, Beth helped Steph settle you into a seat, making sure Twix was secure in your arms. “There you go, bubs. Let’s get you out of the sun,” Beth whispered, wiping a small bead of sweat from your brow.

You crawled onto Beth’s lap, resting your head against her chest. “Can we go back to the hotel after this?” you asked, your voice small and tired.

Beth nodded, rubbing your back. “Of course we can. We’ll get you a nice cool drink, and then we can rest in our room. How does that sound?”

You nodded, your eyes already starting to droop. “Okay, Mummy.”

Steph sat down in the seat next to you. “You did great today, Roo. Did you have fun?”

You managed a small smile as you nodded, “Yeah… but I’m tired. Legs hurt…”

“They’re only small aren’t they?” Steph laughed as you nodded once again, “Those little legs have done a lot of walking today!”

Beth kissed the top of your head. “We’ll be back at the hotel soon, bubs. Until then, why don’t you take a nap?”

“Okay,” you whispered, finally letting your eyes close as you snuggled into Beth’s side, your hand still clutching Twix tightly.

You soon fell asleep and cuddled up to Beth’s chest as her finger brushed up and down your cheek. She knew how hard this trip was for you, and she was determined to do whatever it took to make you feel safe and loved, even if it meant adjusting plans and making sure you were always by her side.

The team soon got back onto the coach and you headed back to the hotel, Beth even managed to carry you in and lay you down in bed without you waking up.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

That next day was match day, you loved getting to watch Beth play but today you weren’t excited. It had been another rough night for you both with you waking up multiple times throughout the night for different reasons.

“Look at you, Roo!” Beth smiled as she crouched down in front of you and fixed your Arsenal shirt. “Should I take a picture so I can send it to Mamma? She’d love to see your shirt!”

You perked up a little at the mention of Viv, “Yeah! Make sure to get a photo of the back so she can see your name on it!” You told Beth before posing with Twix.

After Beth had taken a few photos of you and Twix, she packed your backpack with snacks and toys that you had told her you wanted to take with you.

It wasn’t long before you found yourself arriving at the stadium and getting off of the coach with Beth. Once you got to the changing rooms, Beth stopped and crouched down to your height.

“Okay Mummy needs to go get ready,” she explained to you gently, “Can you go with Auntie Lia and Vic while Mummy gets ready to play and warms up? I’ll come to see you before the match yeah?”

Your tiny hand gripped Beth's tightly, your eyes wide with uncertainty as she knelt down to your level. The atmosphere of the stadium overwhelmed you, and the thought of being away from Beth even for a short time made you feel overwhelmed as you clutched Twix tightly.

"But I wanna stay with you, Mummy," you whispered, your voice barely audible. Your bottom lip quivered, and Beth could see the anxiety building in your eyes.

Beth's heart ached at the sight. She knew how much you were struggling with all the changes and new experiences, and the last thing she wanted was to make you feel any more uncomfortable.

"I know, sweetheart," Beth said softly, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "But Mummy has to get ready so she can play the match. I promise I'll be back before you know it. Auntie Lia and Vic are going to take really good care of you, and they'll make sure you have lots of fun!”

"I stay with you until you have to go on the field?" you pleaded.

Beth hesitated for a moment, considering your request. She could see how much it meant to you and knew that pushing you too hard might only make things worse.

"Alright, bubs," Beth finally agreed, her voice gentle. "You can stay with me while I get ready. But as soon as I need to go out for warm-ups, you'll go with Auntie Lia and Vic, okay? And then I'll come see you right before the match starts."

Your face brightened a little at her words and you smiled. "Okay, Mummy," you agreed, nodding your head.

Beth smiled and kissed your forehead before standing up, still holding your hand. "Come on then, let's go to the changing room."

Beth found her spot and you sat down while she got changed into her kit, "Are cheer loudly?” She asked you.

You nodded eagerly, "I'll cheer really loud!"

Beth laughed, "I know you will. You're my best cheerleader."

Soon enough, it was time for Beth to head out for warm-ups. She crouched down in front of you one more time, making sure you had everything you needed. "Alright, sweetie, it's time for me to go now. But remember, I'll be back really soon. Auntie Lia and Vic are going to take you to the stands where you can see everything, and I'll come find you before the match starts, okay?"

You hesitated for a moment but then nodded, trusting Beth's words. "Okay, Mummy."

Beth kissed your forehead again, and then gently passed you over to Lia, who took your hand with a warm smile. "We're going to have so much fun, Roo!" Lia said, her voice full of excitement.

"Yeah, and maybe we can even get some snacks while we wait," Vic added, giving you a wink.

You gave a small smile, still holding onto Twix tightly. "Okay," you agreed, feeling a bit more at ease.

As Beth headed out to the field for warm-ups, she made a mental note to check in on you as soon as she could. After her warm-up, Beth made a quick detour before heading back to the changing rooms. True to her promise, she found you, Lia, and Vic sitting in the stands. Your eyes lit up when you saw her, and she felt a bit of relief knowing you were okay.

Beth knelt in front of you as you munched on some popcorn, "You doing alright, Roo?"

You nodded, your earlier anxiety mostly forgotten. "Yeah, Mummy. We got popcorn!"

Beth gasped, matching your excitement, “Oh I’m so jealous! You’ll have to save me some!”

"I will!" you promised, giving her a big smile. “And I’ll cheer for you!”

“Oh, I can’t wait!” Beth said. With one last kiss on your forehead, Beth headed back to the locker room.

As the game began, you sat between Vic and Lia, your small hands busy with a colouring book, while the noise of the stadium surrounded you. Despite the excitement around you, your focus remained mostly on your drawings, glancing up occasionally to see Beth when she was near the ball.

"Look, Roo! Mummy's got the ball!" Lia pointed out, her voice full of enthusiasm as she tapped you gently.

You lifted your head just in time to see Beth make a pass. Your eyes widened, and you cheered softly, "Go, Mummy!"

Vic chuckled beside you. "That's right! Keep an eye on her, Roo. You might see her score a goal!"

You giggled, but then quickly returned to your colouring, the stadium's energy not quite matching your own. "I'm drawing a picture for Mummy," you announced, holding up your book to show them.

"Oh, that's beautiful!" Vic praised, "Mummy's going to love that."

"Yeah!" Lia agreed. "Maybe we can give it to her after the game. What do you think?"

You nodded eagerly, "She can put it in her locker!"

"Perfect idea," Vic said, smiling down at you. "Mummy will be so happy when she sees it."

The game continued and the noise of the stadium started to get to you. The cheers, the shouts, and the general buzz felt overwhelming. The heat didn't help either; despite the excitement around you, beads of sweat started to form on your forehead, and your cheeks turned pink.

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, trying to focus on your colouring, but it was getting harder. Finally, you looked up at Lia, tugging on her sleeve.

"Lia, it's too loud," you whined. "And it's hot. I don't like it."

"Oh, Roo, I'm sorry it's making you feel like that. How about we take a little break?" Lia said, “Would you like some water?”

Vic nodded in agreement and handed you a bottle of water. "Do you want to sit on my lap, Roo?”

You hesitated for a moment, then nodded, feeling a bit more at ease with the idea. Vic helped you climb onto her lap, her arms wrapping around you securely. You cuddled against her, the noise and heat a bit more bearable now.

Lia smiled softly, “If it gets too much, we can always go somewhere quieter."

With Vic’s arms around you, the overwhelming sounds of the stadium faded a little, and the heat wasn’t so bad. You felt safer, and even though the noise was still there, it wasn’t as scary anymore.

“Do you want to keep colouring?” Vic asked.

“No thank you,” you murmured as you relaxed against her.

For the rest of the half, you stayed on Vic’s lap, her presence making the noise and heat more bearable. Now and then, Lia would point out something on the field, and you'd peek out to see, but mostly, you were content to just sit quietly, feeling safe and loved in the midst of all the excitement.

When halftime came, Beth was subbed off, and after a quick cool-down, she made her way straight to the stands. You saw her approaching, and without hesitation, you jumped up from Vic’s lap.

“Mummy!” you called out, your voice filled with excitement. Beth caught you easily, lifting you into her arms and holding you close as you wrapped your arms around her neck.

Beth smiled and placed a kiss on your cheek, “Are you having fun?”

You nodded, though your hold on her didn’t loosen. “Yeah… but it’s loud,” you admitted, pressing your face into her shoulder.

Beth rubbed your back. “I know, sweetheart. It’s a big place, isn’t it? But you’re doing so well. Do you want to come sit with me on the bench for a bit?”

You looked up at her with wide eyes, “Can I?”

“Of course you can,” Beth smiled, “Come on, let’s go.”

With you still clinging to her, Beth carried you down to the bench where the rest of the team was sitting. She made sure you were comfortable, sitting you down on her lap, your small legs dangling off the edge. The sun began to make you feel grumpy as you played with the hem of your t-shirt and held Twix close to your chest.

“You hot?” Beth asked you as she noticed your grumpiness settling back in.

You nodded your head, your face scrunched up, “Mhm, it’s too sticky.”

“What’s wrong, mini meadema?” Katie asked from beside you.”

“Hot and tired,” you grumbled, your tiny fingers playing with Twix’s ear. “Missin’ Mamma too.”

“I know, kiddo,” Katie said, “But yer will be back home with her before yer know it! She’ll be so excited to see ye!”

“I don’t get why I’ve been shoved out here, when I could be doing something in there to help!” You heard Monkey grumble as she came to sit back in her seat.

You weren't entirely sure what she was upset about, but she was making her point known that she was upset.

You couldn’t help but listen to Monkey and Kyra talk about whatever it is that had gotten Monkey so worked up about, but whatever it was, you guessed it must have been important.

You were too hot and bothered to even want to talk, you were much more comfortable sitting on Beth’s lap with Twix. You don’t even realise when Leah and Buddy came to sit beside the two of you, it was only when Beth spoke up did you notice they were there.

“Hi, Buddy!” Beth greeted, giving her a small wave as you continued to sit on her lap in a grump.

You had good reason too though when it was so hot, and you missed Viv a whole lot.

You couldn’t care less about the conversation going on around you, needless the conversation that Kyra had struck up with Buddy, who seemed to be upset about something as well.

You wondered where did her own Arsenal top go? That was probably what she was upset about.

“Monkey, stop!” You heard the small protest of Buddy, looking at the older girl with a glare that was scarily identical to Leah’s.

Whatever Monkey did must’ve really upset Buddy if she was shouting like she was.

“Oh, now I know you’re feeling better if you’re scowling at me like Mum does,” You heard Monkey joke back with the girl as she stuck her tongue out at Leah.

You don’t pay much attention to the rest of the conversation between them, but you watched as Leah made Monkey go and start warming up and you can’t help but even giggle at Monkey’s flair for dramatics as she walked away.

She was really funny sometimes!

“That girl sometimes, eh?” Beth chuckled in amusement as she watched Monkey walk away.

“Tell me about it,” Leah replied as she adjusted Buddy’s sun hat on her head to keep the sun out of her eyes, “She’s a pain in the butt sometimes, but we love her, don’t we, Buddy?”

“Monkey’s my favourite person,” Buddy declared, snuggling closer to Leah.

You heard Beth dramatically gasp from where you were sitting on her lap, “What? I thought I was your favourite person!”

“No, that’s me,” You hear Katie pipe up from the other side of where she sat beside Beth.

“No, you’re both silly,” Buddy giggled at the two of them, “Monkey’s my favourite!”

“I’m offended,” Beth continued to pretend to be upset as she kept one arm safe around you, “I’m your favourite, right, Roo?” she asked you, tickling your stomach slightly.

“Yeah,” You agreed quietly, while fiddling with the hem of your own Arsenal shirt.

“Well at least my daughter agrees,” Beth joked as she tried to lighten the mood by looking at you and trying to cheer you up.

You definitely weren’t in a good mood. It was too hot, you just wanted to go back to the hotel and get out of this heat. It seemed like Buddy was feeling the same as well.

Leah leaned in close to you as she could see how upset you were, “You know, Roo, I know you’re missing your Mamma but she’s going to be so happy to see you when you’re back home. I bet she can’t wait to hear all about your time here.”

You couldn’t help but look up at Leah with a small smile when she mentioned Viv, “Really?”

“Oh, absolutely,” Leah nodded, her voice was somewhat warm and reassuring to you, “And just think of the big hug she’s going to give you when you see her again. She’s going to want to hear every single detail.”

You supposed that Leah was right, you couldn’t wait to tell her about your time in America when you did get to see her and her time in Australia.

Your smile grew a little wider and you finally relaxed a bit against Beth, “I miss her,” You admit to the blonde as you turned around on her lap to snuggle into her chest.

“I know, sweetheart,” Beth replied as she rubbed your back, “I miss her too, but Auntie Le is right. Mamma is going to be so excited to hear about everything that you’ve been up to.”

Leah continued to give you a warm smile as she looked between you and Buddy, “I think I might have an idea to cheer you girls up after the game,” She paused, “I think we should get some ice cream! What do you think?”

Ice cream? You love that! How did Leah know you liked it so much?

“Ice cream!” Buddy squealed in excitement, from where she sat on Leah’s lap.

Beth laughed at Buddy’s enthusiasm and looked down to look at you, “Oh ice cream does sound good, doesn’t it, Roo?”

Your face suddenly brightened at the suggestion of ice cream, “I like ice cream!” You told Leah with a small smile on your face.

“I know you do,” Leah said, giving you a soft smile, “And you know who else likes ice cream? That big kid over there,” She gestured onto the field where the subs board was about to be changed for Monkey to go onto the pitch along with Kyra, Steph and Caitlin.

“Monkey likes ice cream a lot!” Buddy said aloud.

“Yeah she does, so we’ll have to make sure that Monkey doesn’t eat it all before we get there,” Leah playfully joked with Buddy.

“No, Monkey can’t eat it all!” Buddy whined in protest at the idea of Monkey eating all of the ice cream, “You have to stop her, Mummy!”

“Don’t worry, we will,” Leah laughed in amusement, “Look she’s about to go onto the pitch now so you can watch her!” She pointed with her index finger to where Monkey was racing onto the pitch.

“Go, Monkey! Go!” Buddy shouted enthusiastically, waving her hand in the air.

You usually liked to watch Monkey on the pitch as well, but you were just too hot and bothered with the weather to cheer loudly and you were snuggled closely against Beth’s chest.

“Mummy, you and Auntie Beth look silly!” Buddy couldn’t help but giggle at the current way that the two of them both had the brightly coloured yellow bibs on their heads to protect them from the sun.

Buddy was right, they did look silly wearing them. You’re glad you have your own to provide you the protection from it.

“It’s the only way to keep us from getting too hot,” Leah told Buddy as she laughed, “I’m not fortunate to have a sun hat like you do, Bubba.” She explained.

“Yeah, where can I get one of those lovely pink hats?” Beth chipped in, her tone playful as she nudged Buddy slightly.

“Mine,” Buddy giggled at the blonde’s playful antics.

You were too hot to care much about the match in general. The heat was relentless and it wasn’t too long before the sun got to Buddy either and she was shifting about uncomfortably in her seat.

Usually, you would happily play with Buddy but the sun was too much today, it just made you feel weak, and it wasn’t nice at all.

There was a brief water break where all the players on the pitch rehydrated before they went again, you didn’t even have the energy to giggle when Monkey sprayed water on Buddy like you usually would have done. You felt relief when the final whistle blew, the match was over and now you could get ice cream.

Leah and Buddy headed straight onto the pitch to go and find Monkey, but you were less enthusiastic about wanting to go down there.

“Come on Roo,” Beth said gently, standing up with you in her arms she already knew you wouldn’t want to walk, “Let’s go and say hi to your Aunties.”

You didn’t want to do that though, you just wanted to go and get ice cream. Why did you have to walk around a pitch instead?

Needless to say, you were less than thrilled about the fact that Beth had to be involved in a team talk in the sun.

“Kick the ball with me, Roo!” Buddy came up to you and gestured to the stray ball on the field, “Kick it, Roo!” She repeated, pointing to the ball.

You were hot and bothered, the last thing you wanted to do was run around a pitch and kick a ball, but it was something that made Buddy happy and your little cousin was always fun to play with. You slipped down Beth’s body and ran over to the ball before kicking it to Buddy.

“I can’t believe you’re playing football without me!” You heard Monkey gasp dramatically, making her way to join in with kicking the ball around.

“I wanna join as well!” Kyra chimed in, joining the makeshift game.

Was the team chat over with now? Could you finally go and eat ice cream?

“Shoot, Roo!” Monkey encouraged you to kick the ball into the net when you had the ball at your feet, “Shoot it!”

You kicked the ball like you were told to do, watching the ball roll into the back of the net but you were less than energetic to celebrate that goal.

“She shoots and she scores, the crowd goes wild! Ahhhh!” Monkey exclaimed, tossing you up into her arms and spinning you around.

You did have to admit that you had fun playing football with them.

Buddy scored a goal as well and Monkey lifted her onto her shoulders and ran around the pitch with her to celebrate, both of them energetic as one another.

How could Monkey be so hyper still when she’d played football out in the sun? It’s way too hot for that!

However, it wasn’t long before your cousins got distracted hearing Leah shouting something aloud while wearing a huge red and white Gunner-branded cowboy hat and it made them want to run off and find out more about it.

You ran back over to Beth who was now standing with Steph. “Up please?”

Beth scooped you up and carried you on her hip, you began to play with the fabric on her shirt, “Can we get ice cream now please?” You asked.

Steph gasped, tickling your stomach, “You’re getting ice cream?”

You nodded excitedly, “Yeah, Mummy’s taking me with Leah and Buddy!”

“Ice cream!” You heard Buddy exclaim, clutching a hold of a newfound white bunny in her hands, “Auntie Beth and Roo coming as well?”

“Course we are,” Beth replied as you made your way over to them, you were glad to finally be leaving and going to get a sweet treat.

“Ice cream!” You shouted enthusiastically, still resting on Beth’s hip.

Leah laughed at the enthusiasm, “Alright, ice cream it is. Before we go, we need to get changed out of our kits first,” She gestured between herself, Beth and Monkey, “We don’t want to be sitting in these sweaty clothes while we eat.”

Monkey didn’t agree with that decision though, “Can’t we just go as we are? I want ice cream now!” She whined, dragging out the last word in complaint.

Leah chuckled at the younger girl’s impatience, shaking her head, “Come on Menace, it won’t take that long,” She reassured her, taking her by the arm and leading her back toward the changing rooms.

“Can I come with you, Mummy?” You peered up to Beth hopeful, you didn’t want to be without her.

“You don’t want to stay with Auntie Lia?” Beth wondered, gesturing to Lia who was going to keep an eye on Buddy, along with Leah’s mum, Amanda who had come out to watch the match.

“No thank you. I want to stay with you,” You told her quietly as she set you down on the ground.

“Okay Roo, come on then,” Beth replied in agreement, taking hold of your hand as you headed to the changing rooms where Beth was quick to get dressed before the four of you walked back out to find Buddy, Lia and Amanda.

“Now we get ice cream?” Buddy asked eagerly.

“Yes, Bubba, now we’ll go and get ice cream,” Leah agreed with a smile as she ruffled the 3 year olds’ hair gently.

Finally, now you were going to get ice cream, you were more than excited to race ahead of the adults in the group with Buddy and Monkey to the ice cream stand.

“Ooh, I want mint chocolate chip!” Monkey called out eagerly, practically bouncing with anticipation.

“Strawberry,” You chimed in, your eyes already scanning the ice cream options.

Leah smiled down at Buddy as she looked at the bright menu in front of you, “How about you, Bubba?” She asked, her voice gentle as she watched her daughter contemplate the choices.

Buddy glanced at the colourful display of flavours, each one more tempting than the last, “Ummm… chocolate,” She started, then spotted the bubblegum and her eyes lit up, “Nuh uh, wait– I wan’ bubblegum, Mummy!”

Leah laughed at her excitement, “Bubblegum it is then, Bubba,” She said, giving her hand a gentle squeeze before checking what everyone else wanted in the small group and placing the order.

“Mm, this ice cream is great,” Lia said, savouring the treat.

Amanda, who had tagged along on the trip, nodded in agreement with Lia, “Are you enjoying that, sweetheart?” She chuckled and looked at Buddy, who had all but dived in to eat her ice cream and in no time it was all around her face.

Buddy always makes a mess when she eats anything!

“Messy bubba,” Leah teased, wiping away some of the ice cream with a napkin as her tone was filled with affection.

“This has gotta be the best ice cream I’ve ever tasted!” Monkey exclaimed, eyes wide with satisfaction and she’s definitely right there!

Beth laughed and nudged her slightly, “I swear you say that every time you have ice cream,” She teased as she peered down at you, “How is it, Roo?”

“So good, Mummy!” You replied with a big smile, “I like it!”

“That’s cos’ it’s the best ice cream I’ve ever tasted!” Monkey stated as a matter of fact, “Can’t prove me wrong on that one!”

“Alright, menace. It is good ice cream,” Leah rolled her eyes and laughed in agreement with the younger girl.

[forgetmaenott]

Butterflies - TADC Showtime Oneshot

A/N: Because I love the idea of Pomni being in denial and Caine unintentionally making it worse (better)

It was no secret that Caine was, by far, the most oblivious entity in the entire circus. And yet, even he was aware of just how much Pomni had been avoiding him lately. If she was trying to keep it from being so obvious, she was certainly doing a poor job of it.

Emotions were still a bit of a foreign concept to Caine. He experienced them, despite the fact that he probably shouldn't. But he still had a difficult time labeling them. The best he could do was observe how the others acted and make an educated guess. Nonetheless, if his time spent with Pomni had taught him anything about emotions, he suspected he was feeling...concerned.

He had spent the past few days piecing together an adventure perfectly suited for Pomni. He made sure to add all the details she told him she liked from the real world, all the things she missed, everything he had stored in her memory. This morning, he was announcing it with every ounce of energy he had in his system, looking Pomni in the eye in the hopes to impress her. His code fluttered at the idea of her praise.

"...and, it's up to you to piece this mystic mystery together!" Caine finished his introduction of today's adventure. Pomni said one time that she was interested in the mystery genre back at home, as it gave her a challenge to think of and piece together. Like a puzzle, she had said. She liked those. He glanced at Pomni subtly, hoping he had her attention.

"Huh. Intersting. My money's on Zooble being the culprit," Jax crossed his arms, flashing his signature yellow grin.

"It's not even a murder mystery, you jack[#$%!]," Zooble grumbled in response.

"Heh. We'll see about that."

"Well, this sounds like a good one! Piecing together clues, solving puzzles, what do you think, Pomni?" Ragatha asked the woman next to her, swinging her plush arms.

Her eyes were glued to the floor. "Oh...um, think I'm gonna sit this one out..." Pomni said meekly, tightening her own grip on her arm as thought it would bring her comfort.

Caine's arms drooped, hanging sadly by his sides as his cane clinked to the stage's floor. "You...don't?"

Pomni shifted uncomfortably. "I'm sorry, maybe next time..."

Caine flew by her side, hoping to get a glimpse of her face. "But my dear, you've been saying that for the past four adventures."

"Yeah? Well, maybe I'm uh, sick or something. I don't know. Not feeling my best," Pomni excused herself, coughing lightly in an utterly unconvincing manner.

Caine placed a finger on his lower jaw in thought. "Sick? That shouldn't happen in the digital circus. Unless you have some sort of bug or glitch. I can run some tests if you'd like--!"

"Oh! No thanks, I think I just need to rest," Pomni swung her foot awkwardly, refusing to meet his eyes. 

“Pomni? Are you sure you’ve been feeling okay lately?” Ragatha asked with a concerned frown.

Pomni blushed ever so slightly at the stares of the other circus members. “Yeah, I’m fine! Don’t worry about it. I’m just gonna head to my room now to uh, rest…”

“Oh, okay. Well uh, catch you after the adventure!” Ragatha called as Pomni hurried away.

Zooble watched her grow, crossing their arms. “Huh. What’s been her deal lately?”

“Someone’s got a secret,” Jax smiled mischievously.

“Or she’s just tired,” Gangle suggested shyly.

“Not very likely,” Ragatha replied.

“Did someone say something about a butterfly?” Kinger peeked out of his impenetrable fortress.

If Caine had a heart, it would have broken into pieces at the sight of Pomni scurrying away from him. It took all the energy he had left in his coding to remain enthusiastic for the others. “Well, that leaves the rest of you. There you go, and have fun my darling detectives!”

He ushered them off into the portal quickly before dusting off his suit and snapping himself in front of Pomni’s door…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

She couldn't escape his eyes.

And she loved and hated it.

His gaze made her shiver, formerly from being unnerved but these days, that sensation was met with a thumping heart and fluttering stomach. Sometimes, she swore the eyes in the circus's paintings would follow her ever so slightly, staring when she wasn't looking then flicking back into position when she turned to glance. The idea of him looking at her in that way made her face flush.

Conscious of the dozens of eyes in the hall, she felt herself blush to the tips of her ears. As quickly as she could escape her fluster, she shut the door of her room behind her and crashed on her bed, sighing in relief at the privacy.

What the hell was wrong with her these days? How was a pair of teeth and eyes--a computer--making her feel like this? Her captor? She grumbled nonsense into her pillow, feeling her face flush at the thought of him. The idea of his touch, the way he looked at her so curiously sometimes—it made her tingle to the tips of her toes.

Oh, God, she felt sick with anxiety. She couldn't possibly have a crush on him, right? It had to be all psychological. It was all in her head, and once she stopped thinking of it she'd certainly be back to normal.

But even so, she couldn't help but hide out in her room these past days, avoiding being seen blushing or tripping over her words around him. He was oblivious and likely wouldn't catch on, but it would still be rather awkward to explain--God forbid the others find out about it, especially Jax. She would never live it down.

Pomni held the ends of her pillow tighter against her face as though it would squeeze the confusing thoughts and feelings from her mind. He made it so much worse today. His adventure was finely tuned to her interests, something he had clearly remembered from their many conversations about her life in the real world--well, what she could remember, that is. It was endearing, it was charming, and sweet, and It had even made her heart flutter--she couldn't do it. She couldn't let herself fall apart in front of any of them.

It was just a small crush. She'd get over it in a day or so, and then things would be entirely back to normal. Pomni took a deep breath, repeating that idea in her head.

Her head was pounding from these thoughts--or, no, that was the sound of her door. She groaned, peeking up out of her pillow at the noise.

"Pomni? May I come in?"

Pomni's stomach dropped at the sound of Caine's voice behind the door. Butterflies fluttered in her stomach, her heart suddenly thumping from the anxiety. "Uhh--maybe later! I kind of just need to rest right now--"

"I'm aware, dear. Just give me a moment of your time. Please?"

Pomni stopped in her tracks. He usually was energetic and boisterous but now, he was talking almost normal. He almost sounded sad. Her heart ached with guilt. "Um, okay..."

She begrudgingly climbed out of her bed, smoothing her clothes and taking a deep breath before opening the door. Sure enough, Caine stood there, fidgeting with his cane in his hands. His eyes brightened ever so slightly at the sight of her peeking from behind her open door. "Ah, there's my star! How are you, dear? Feeling any better?"

"Oh, hah. Yeah..." she couldn't think of what else to say, feeling at her hat for no reason in particular.

"Anyways, the others are off on the adventure, so I figured you and I could spend some time together! No one else, just us for the day," Caine beamed proudly at his idea.

Pomni's heart immediately started racing, a flush already traveling its way to her cheeks. God, she had it bad for him. This was humiliating. "Just...us?" she squeaked.

Caine looked at the floor sheepishly. "Well, ah, admittedly I couldn't help but notice some...behavioral changes in you these past days. So, I figured what better way to get you right back to normal than to spend some quality time with your ringmaster!" He perked up proudly at this, flying to her side and placing an arm around her.

Pomni froze at his touch, praying he couldn't feel the way her heart was beating so firmly against her chest. "O-oh, um...that's a great idea, Caine, but--"

He gripped her shoulders. "Isn't it? I just knew you'd like it!"

Pomni tried to avoid his eyes, but with him gazing so intensely at her in front of her, it was sort of hard to do. "Y-yeah, but...honestly, Caine, I think I just want to do something more, I don't know, not stressful?" she tripped up on her words, trying to get some excuse out.

"Not stressful? Why, I have the perfect idea in mind!" Caine said proudly, snapping his fingers without another word from Pomni. She tensed from the unpleasant sensation of traveling through the digital plane so unnaturally. "Here we are!"

Pomni opened her eyes and immediately flushed at the sight before her. It was a secluded area of the digital forest, dotted with colorful flowers and petals resting delicately on the grass. Everything lacked in detail, yet somehow, the way the digital sunlight was streaming in, lighting the path ahead made it feel...intimate, somehow.

Caine floated down until he touched the ground. He took a few steps experimentally, adjusting to walking rather than flying. He did walk, he just preferred not to. But this time was a special occasion. He turned back to Pomni, holding out his gloved hand.

Pomni froze. Did he want to hold her hand? Was he just inviting her to join him? Or maybe both? Hesitantly, she reached the tips of her fingers out, just barely grazing over his glove and making the contact she was so afraid of. Caine, however, wasted no time as he slid his hand beneath hers and grabbed her whole hand in his, pulling her to his side.

Pomni nearly tripped, not expecting him to pull her forward. Before she could even react to his hand holding onto hers, he let go as they began to walk. She bit her lip, not sure how to begin the conversation.

"This is, uh, a new map?" Pomni asked meekly.

"Nonsense! It's part of the digital forest. I just added a few extra details," Caine explained, reaching out and picking a flower as proof. He held it out to her. "For you, dear."

Her heart skipped a beat. Did he know what he was doing to her? Was he trying to make her flustered? Even so, she took the flower in her hands, careful not to make contact with his hand. "...thanks," was all she could say.

Caine nodded, and for a moment all was quiet as they walked down the sunlit pathway. "I...can't help but notice that you haven't been participating in the adventures lately."

Pomni held back a sigh. She knew there was no avoiding this topic, but she still resented the fact that he brought it up. "Mhm."

"...Why is that? If I may ask."

Pomni twisted the flower's stem in her hands, looking at how the flower lacked proper rendering or detail. "Just haven't been feeling up to it," she murmured.

"In what way?"

Pomni blinked. "I-I don't know, Caine. I just haven't."

She still wasn't meeting his gaze, so he tilted his head so he was in her field of vision. She blushed and looked to the side, hoping he wouldn't move to her other side.

"Hm. Perhaps the others were right," Caine said thoughtfully, holding his cane in his hands.

Pomni internally panicked. Oh, God, they weren't telling him she had feelings for him, were they? "The others were right? How?" she asked, hoping her nerves weren't showing.

If Caine could blush, he surely would have by now. He lowered his gaze to the grass as the continued walking. "Oh...well...they've been saying that you're...avoiding me," he said sheepishly, before piping up, "I-I'm sure that they were jumping to conclusions but--"

Pomni squeezed her eyes shut. "It's fine, Caine."

Caine fidgeted with his cane again. "I have to admit, darling, I've missed our lessons."

Pomni smiled half-heartedly. Their 'lessons' as he called them, were simple conversations about the real world. To him, he considered them lessons on the human mind. But to her, it gave her someone to talk to. "I have, too," she admitted.

Caine didn't say anything for a moment, likely storing her saying she had missed him to his memory. "Then, dear, why haven't we seen much of each other?" He hesitated, then, "...have you been avoiding me?"

Pomni felt sick. She couldn't possibly lie to him in good conscience. "...yes."

Caine's colors seemed to lose their saturation, shoulders sinking at her confession. "I...I see," he mustered, voice laced with heartbreak.

Pomni turned to look at him for the first time today, her heart sinking at the sight of his shoulders slumped, eyes faced downwards. From his perspective, she had been avoiding him for no reason. His first real friend, leaving him behind. Guilt hit her like a truck. "Oh, Caine, no. No, I-it's not like that, really," she tripped over her words, trying to make him feel better because the sight of him sad was so damn depressing.

"I've...often been told I'm annoying the others. If that was the case here, I don't blame you for taking space," he replied quietly.

Pomni bit her lip. Looking to her side, she saw a red flower in the same shade of his suit. She picked it before stepping in front of him, leaning down into his field of vision the same way he had done for her. He stopped walking.

"Caine...I wasn't avoiding you because of you. You didn't do anything wrong, okay? I-It was all me," Pomni reassured.

Caine glanced up. "I...didn't do anything wrong?"

Pomni shook her head. "I promise."

Caine considered her words for a moment.

"I...I really, really like our time together, Caine. You don't bother me, I like when you're around. You're my...friend," Pomni added, smiling softly at him.

His eyes met hers for the first time today, sending butterflies fluttering in Pomni's stomach. "Really?"

Pomni held out the flower further. "Really. I mean it, Caine."

Color gradually returned to his form, a smile forming across his teeth. "Oh, dear..." he looked at the flower, clearly touched by the gift. He never received gifts from the others, so this...this was something special.

He met her eyes again and reached out for the flower, but decided to take it a step further. His hand slid around hers, cupping the hand that was holding the flower out to him. Pomni's breath hitched, her pupils dilating as he gazed into her eyes lovingly.

"My dear Pomni," was all he said, for he was too touched by her words to say anything else.

The butterflies fluttered in Pomni's stomach more than ever. She shivered slightly at the sound of his voice, so laced with emotion when he said her name, calling her his, looking at her so lovingly--

Caine snapped out of his daze at the sight of her shivering. He nearly snapped his fingers to help her feel warmer, but he suddenly recalled something she had told him one night. Wearing others clothes was a sign of intimacy, whatever that meant--all he knew is this felt pretty intimate. He shrugged off his coat and wrapped it around her instead. "I can't let you get any more sick, now can I?" he winked at her, referencing her poor excuse for her absence earlier.

Pomni blushed to the tips of her ears when he winked at her. They were in the middle of a sunlit path, gazing into each others' eyes, gifting each other flowers, and now she was wearing his coat--God, it was almost like he was trying to make her blush. She suddenly felt very hot, simultaneously wanting to take off his coat to cool down but, shamefully, also never wanting to take it off.

"Heh, yeah..." was all she could say, because if she said anything else she was sure he'd notice the tremble in her voice.

He smiled at her adorable reaction. "I must say, it suits you quite well, my dear. You could almost challenge my position as ringmaster!"

If she could blush anymore, she certainly did from his compliment. It almost made her laugh, how much he was making her feel tingly and fluttery without even trying. "Maybe I will," she teased.

Caine had to resist flying in the air from happiness. She was acting back to normal with him--albeit a bit shyer than usual, but no matter--and he loved it. "Ah ah ah, careful, dear. If you're coming for my job then I have to warn you, I was coded to be this charming."

Pomni giggled at his comment. "Really? You'd be surprised, I can put on quite the show."

"I won't believe it until I see it," Caine challenged.

"Hah, you will. And when you do, you'll have to wear this hat and I'll wear yours."

Caine looked at her in thought, smiling at the way she looked in his coat. "Really? Me in a jester hat? And you in mine? I'd like to see it," he said, but he wasn't sure If he was talking about the show anymore.

Pomni grinned at the idea, the image itself quite funny yet also endearing.

"Well, if that challenge is all settled, how about we finish our walk through the grounds?" Caine offered, gesturing to the path ahead.

Pomni allowed herself to touch the collar of the jacket, tightening it around herself. "Uh-huh," she said, her confidence gradually returning.

"Fantastic!" Caine's feet nearly floated above the ground from how thrilled he was that they were on good terms again. They continued their walk through the grounds, nearing the end of the digital forest and catching a glimpse of the nearby carnival.

They stopped at the edge of the lake where Pomni glanced subtly at her reflection. In the back of her mind, she knew she was doing it to make sure she didn’t look silly in front of Caine. She was well aware of his gaze now. It could burn a hole right through her.

The sight of her wearing Caine’s coat made her blush, somehow both embarrassed and pleased. On one hand, wearing his coat seemed like a big jump when she was still adjusting to her strong feelings. On the other hand…it felt nice to be wrapped in something of his. Her stomach fluttered again at the thought, emotions so strong she almost felt sick.

Caine carefully approached her. “If I may ask, darling,” he began, fiddling with his cane again behind his back, “if I didn’t do anything to scare you off, then why were you avoiding me?”

Pomni snapped out of her thoughts. “Oh, um…I don’t know…” she rushed to think of an explanation. A half-truth, maybe. Something that wasn’t a lie or a confession. She definitely wasn’t ready for that yet—she was barely able to accept she even had feelings to begin with.

Caine blinked curiously at her, awaiting her response. “You don’t know?”

Pomni’s heart thumped in her chest. “Oh, no—I mean well, I do know, i-it’s not that I don’t, but, it’s sort of hard to explain, you know? Personal stuff. Just been uh, busy in my thoughts, heh…” she sputtered out nonsense, shrinking in embarrassment at how visibly flustered she was becoming.

Caine tilted his head curiously. “My dear, are you feeling alright? You seem a bit out of sorts.”

Oh, God. He noticed. She knew she was hiding from him for a reason. “Huh? O-oh, that? It’s nothing, really Caine, I mean I feel okay. I feel fine. I had a reason for avoiding you, and it wasn’t because you did something wrong, but…”

She met his gaze as she trailed off, blushing at the sight of his curious eyes on her, waiting patiently for a response. Her breath caught in her throat. God, did she really like him that much? That all her thoughts just froze in time like that?

“Well, I…” she sighed, taking another deep breath before continuing, “I…have been thinking. About you. N-not in a weird way, just…contemplating things.”

“You’ve been thinking about me? Pomni, I was thinking about you! Isn’t that fantastic?” Caine piped up, floating a bit in the air as he spoke up.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. But I mean…not like that. I was just worried. About things being weird. Things changing,” Pomni admitted, feeling the heat return in her face as she confessed.

Caine grabbed Pomni’s hands lightly to comfort her. “How would things change?”

Her heart sped up at his touch. “I-I…I just know we’re getting closer. And sometimes, for humans, that can be scary,” Pomni tried to explain. Her heart was beating rapidly, butterflies still fluttering around in her stomach nervously. Admittedly, she was scared—her feelings were growing stronger now that she was spending time with him, not going away like she had hoped. She was terrified, even.

Caine pulled out a comically small notebook and large pencil, allegedly writing down what she said. “I see, I see. And humans feel fear when they form bonds with others because…?”

Pomni clutched her arm, looking down at the lake again in thought. She thought about the way he had wrapped the coat around her so gently, how it looked on her shoulders knowing it was normally around his, and she sighed feeling herself heart beating again. “Because it makes you vulnerable. To getting hurt. Losing someone, embarrassing yourself…you know…”

Caine nodded as he jotted down what she said before the notebook and pencil disappeared in a poof. “Is that what you’re afraid of, Pomni?” he asked gently.

Pomni’s eyes widened at the question. “Um, yeah…I think so.”

“So, you avoided me because we’ve become friends, and that scared you because it could lead to losing me or embarrassing yourself. Do I have that correct?”

Pomni hesitated. She couldn’t exactly say the truth. Well, what it really is is that I have suddenly developed strong romantic feelings for you and I didn’t want to admit it or let it grow but now I can’t deny it and am afraid of letting it show in front of you or the others and ultimately humiliating myself.

“Pomni…?”

“What? Oh, yes.” Pomni snapped out of her thoughts.

Caine’s hold on her hands grew slightly tighter. “Dear, I could never hate you. Or leave you. Or even make fun of you, for whatever reason that may be. Every moment I spend with you is another opportunity for me to become even more advanced, and to understand you better. How could I ever judge?”

Pomni laughed half-heartedly. “Yeah…I guess it sounds a bit of a stupid fear when you put it like that.”

“It’s not stupid. It makes sense. And, well…” he placed a finger on his chin in thought, “I think with what you’ve told me, I can guess I’m feeling the same way. In fact, I think that’s why I seemed so worried about having done something to scare you off. Does that sound right? Was I experiencing fear like you?”

Pomni bit her lip. He certainly wasn’t experiencing fear like her, assuming he didn’t suddenly develop a massive crush on her. “Yes,” she said in spite of it all, “that’s a very human thing to feel, Caine.”

Caine lifted off the ground at that, swirling in the air a bit in excitement. “At this rate, I’m becoming more human every day! And it’s all thanks to you, Pomni,” he flew down to her level, pulling the flower he had given her out of his coat pocket.

“That, you are. Heh. Thanks again, Caine,” she smiled, finding his excitement cute. “And um…I’m sorry. For avoiding you these past days? I owe you a lot for all the adventures I missed.”

“All in the past, my dear!” He put an arm around her and brought her close in excitement. “Now how about we enjoy some time at the digital carnival before the others get back! You can tell me allll about your favorite human traditions!”

Pomni giggled again, holding a hand up over her mouth. “Alright, alright. But you’ll have to win some of those games to get information out of me,” she smirked.

“Gasp! Are you suggesting some sort of friendly competition?” Caine placed his hands on his chin in cartoonish shock.

Pomni crossed her arms. “Something like that. Let’s see how much you can get out of me before the others come back.”

Caine laughed. “Oh, dear, you never fail to impress me. Show me what you’ve got, because I must warn you—I am exceptionally talented at carnival games,” he said proudly.

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Pomni repeated his words from earlier.

Caine spun through the air before grabbing for her hand. “Then let’s not waste any time, dear!”

Pomni returned his grip on her hand, not quite as afraid of the butterflies anymore. “Show me what you’ve got, ringmaster.”

A/N: I wrote like half of this at the same time as taking a test, I kept switching tabs and going between showtime and sociology. the showtime grind is real

[aftercamlann]

ACBB 2024 Masterlist

Thank you to all our wonderful writers, artists and beta readers who participated in this years After Camlann Big Bang! We hope you will consider participating again this year!

Below is the final masterlist for After Camlann 2024:

Title: We Are Bruised But Whole Together Author: Tansyuduri Artist: GYRHS Pairings/Characters: Arthur/Merlin. (Arthur Merlin and Freya) Rating: Explicit Word count: 46,999 Summary: Arthur wakes up in modern Glastonbury and to his unfathomable relief finds Merlin. But nothing is simple. Everything he knew is gone, for one. He wonders what of his achievements were actually his own, and not just Merlin's magic, for another. Arthur also has to face the fact that he kept the ban on magic going. Was he ever truly a good king?

There is also the “I love you” he mouthed to Merlin before dying. Something he cannot afford to focus on, because, as Merlin tells him, Albion’s time of greatest need is upon them.

Then comes the unthinkable. Merlin’s magic, which has been growing over the last thousand years, is suddenly too strong for the sorcerer's human body to handle. Faced with the prospect of losing Merlin, feelings suddenly come out and Arthur realizes that if he can save the man he loves and the land of Albion, he might be able to forgive himself for his mistakes and everything he is not.

The question is, can he?

Expect fluff, angst, humor, banter, hurt/comfort, whump, and lots of Merthur!

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: running back home Author: sourw0lfs Artist: kokoshka67 Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur Rating: Mature Word count: 25,126 Summary: With another growl, the monster surges forward, pressing its full weight into Arthur and toppling his footing. They both go down hard with just the damaged sword as a barrier between them. Arthur’s arms shake with the effort to keep it that way, pressing upwards with all the strength he can muster to free himself. The monster barely budges, lips pulling back in a snarl that reveals a mouthful of half-sharp, half-dull teeth. Through his panic, Arthur finally realizes why this monster seems so different from the attacks in the past. His gaze trails from the jagged teeth snapping angrily at him to the side of the creature’s face that isn’t covered in scales, to the side that’s so obviously and glaringly human. Because the monster isn’t a monster at all. It’s something else entirely, some kind of cursed hybrid never before seen. Worst of all, though, Arthur finds that he recognizes the human face beyond the scales and fangs. “Merlin?”

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: london fog and technicolour strobe lights Author: demigodbeautiies Artist: LikeAPaperPlane Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur (main); Gwen/Lancelot (side); Gen Merlin & Various Characters (side) Rating: Mature Word count: 39,822 Summary:he magic in the membrane of the night around them as they duck out into the world is thick and perfectly marvellous, reminding him that he is here, young, and alive, and that’s pretty alright. Nighttime is always better, anyway. When Merlin left his village ten years ago, he really didn't think he'd end up fucking people for money. He still doesn't know what he expected to happen, exactly, but wishes he could figure it out a little bit faster. Then a run of the mill gig goes wrong and changes the course of Merlin's life - just, not in any of the ways he expected it to. That's the funny thing about a summer in London, though: it is utterly impossible to tell what the hell will happen next. Escort Merlin AU, featuring love, lust, and the London Underground. Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: It's Not in the Stars to Hold Author: Storybelle Artist: Summ3rSolstic3 Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Gwen/Lancelot, one-sided Gwaine/Merlin, previous mentioned Gwen/Arthur Rating: Teen and Up Word count: 31,707 Summary: Their friendship hasn't exactly been smooth — since that first day on the train when Arthur had heard about the famed Merlin, to their first potions lesson, their fight in the Great Hall, and every strange, dangerous adventure they've had since then, part of Merlin being the chosen one, the most powerful wizard to ever exist. Arthur's letter didn't come with warnings of Sidhe, or lamia or changelings.

But if it's for Merlin, he'll follow him anywhere, something that proves to be very complicated when he joins Merlin's family for Christmas.

A HogwartsxMerlin mashup

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: A chance encounter Artist: Pinklunamoth Pairings/Characters: Rating: Gen Word count: N/A Summary: Merlin and Arthut have an unexpected reunion

Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: Resurrecting Magic Author: Sage_Owl Artist: wistfulVulpine Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Balinor/Hunith, Ygraine/Uther, Gaius, Morgause, Nimueh, Mordred, Geoffrey, Freya, Tristan, Isolde, Lasy Helen Rating: Teen and Up Word count: 25,041 Summary: Thirty years ago, magic disappeared. Now, a whole generation- including best friends Merlin and Arthur- have grown up without it, only hearing the occasional rumor.

Merlin decides to put his film degree to good use by starting a ghost-hunting show with Arthur, but things quickly go awry. An attempt on Arthur's life leads to Merlin reading a spell that slows down time...but magic is gone, isn't it?

From there, the two friends begin to unravel the conspiracy that destroyed magic, and the prophecy involving their family names that promises to bring it back. Featuring ghosts, arson, solariums, pining, chalk dragons, and definitive proof that even from beyond the grave, Uther Pendragon is an asshole.

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: As One We Stand Author: BGN_846 Artist: Malus_sieversii Pairings/Characters: Merlin & Arthur Rating: Mature Word count: 70,022 Summary: Canon era, canon divergent featuring BAMF!Merlin, irritatingly confusing Kilgharrah, mentally exhausted Arthur, and a very impatient Morgause. Growing up in isolation with his father and a handful of druids, Merlin has been trained in the arts of magic and self-defense. He's also good with a sword, knows how to evade the enemy and is quite literally dying of boredom. NOTHING exciting ever happens aside from the stories his father tells him of days long past about the evils of the outside world. All this changes when a chance encounter leads Merlin to save Arthur Pendragon’s life. He soon discovers he's got a shared destiny with the pratty prince. (who does not like his magic, not one bit) Merlin thought his life was boring before, now he's not sure what to think. In a matter of a few weeks, he's met a dragon, promised to set him free, and may or may not have been tasked with usurping the king! He's managed on his own for this long, what's the worst that could happen? He spends the rest of his life alone, that's what!

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: Let me see you stripped down to the bone Author: where_the_kissing_never_stops Artist: icebreak1010 Pairings/Characters: Gwaine/Percival, background Merlin/Arthur Rating: Mature Word count: 50,027 Summary: Leeds, March 1986.

They're off to a strip night, and Gwaine has no idea how much it will change his life.

He falls head over heels for one of the dancers, and a random encounter lets them meet properly, and Gwaine realises it isn't just Percival's body he likes. Slowly, they become an irreplaceable part of each other's lives. However, Percival's job starts to get in between them, and Gwaine's insecurities grow.

Will they make it together?

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: What Was I Made For? Author: tomatopudding/JetGirl1832 Artist: rasseyanost Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Kara/Lena, Gwen/Lancelot, Arthur Pendragon, Merlin, Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers, Alex Danvers, Morgause, Uther Pendragon, Gwen, Lancelot, J’onn J’onzz, Brainy, Nia Nal, Florence Abbott

Rating: Teen and Up Word count: 63,019 Summary: Merlin had made his peace with his lonely existence, wandering the world waiting for his king to rise again. Then he saw Morgana on the cover of a magazine. Morgause didn't remember being dead but now she's suddenly alive again with only one thought on her mind: find her sister. Lena couldn't help but think that coming to terms with her magic was a lot less confusing before this whole reincarnation thing.

Story is here | Art is here here | Reblog on Tumblr here ***

Title: The Challenge of the Fey Court Author: thenerdyindividual Artist: pyjamacyrptid Pairings/Characters:  Merlin/Arthur, Merlin/Gwaine, Arthur/Gwaine, Merlin/Arthur/Gwaine Rating: Explicit Word count: 97,104 Summary: Balinor meets Hunith and falls madly in love with her. When Ealdor experiences a terrible famine, Balinor takes it upon himself to save them. He makes an agreement with the King of the Seelie (Uther); thirty years of good harvest in exchange for Balinor's first born.

Balinor leaves Hunith with the intention of never having a child with her or any other woman. the problem? Hunith is already with child.

Twenty years later, Merlin is fulfilling Balinor's end of the bargain. He just hopes that his fey husband isn't a complete prat, and that things goes smoothly.

Things do not go smoothly.

Merlin was not expecting to have to complete seven courtship challenges before being allowed to wed. Nor was he expecting his future husband to already be in love with someone else.

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: The Oracle Machine Author: Aro_Tarot Artist: Coconut_head3000 Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon Rating: General Word count: 33,752 Summary: While traveling to Ealdor, the Merchant, Arthur, stumbles across Merlin being picked on by a group. This chance meeting changes everything when he goes against the Mark on his forearm to help him. Merlin ends up coming back with him to Camelot, a place without magic or choices. The lives of every citizen, Marked by a symbol on their forearm and determined by the Oracle Machine.

Story and Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: the beginning & what follows Author: egeria Artist: myoonmii Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Nimueh, Ygraine, Uther, Morgana, Gaius, Hunith Rating: Explicit Word count: 34,948 Summary: When Nimueh saves Ygraine's life, she couldn't have imagined the far-reaching consequences. Really, the consequences might've been worse, if only a little peasant boy hadn't been born.

or: Merlin is raised knowing who he is and all of Albion looks a bit different as a result.

Story and Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: it wasn't the crash that made us, but the debris Author: SlantedKnitting Artist: LFB72 Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, past Merlin/Lance, Morgana, Leon, Gwen Rating: Explicit Word count: 25,037 Summary: When Arthur buys a new flat, it should mean that everything in his life is slotting into place. Instead, he can’t stop going on bad dates, his sister won’t get off his back about mental health, and the cupboard doors keep mysteriously falling open.

When the ghost who haunts the flat reveals himself, Arthur decides to help him finish whatever unresolved business he has that’s keeping him from properly passing on. Once Arthur gets rid of this ghostly Merlin figure, he can go back to getting his own life in order.

Of course Merlin has a poor memory, and as Arthur tries to dig into Merlin’s life, he gets used to having a ghost around his home.

Story is here | Art is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: Right where you left me Author: Brechtjeeatscheese Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur Morgana/Mordred Gwaine& Arthur Rating: Mature Word count: 28,797 Summary: It’s the year 2024 and Arthur and his pack live in a nice town where nothing ever happens. That is, until a long lost love from the past shows up again, Merlin, his former crush now turned enemy.

Merlin quickly brings danger to Arthur and his werewolf pack, but things aren’t quite what they seem. Arthur is forced to reevaluate everything he thought about Merlin and vampires before. And he needs to do it fast, otherwise Merlin’s life can very well be forfeit….

Story is here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: Pas De Deux Author: lavender_spice Artist: Mirayla Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Gwen/Lancelot, Elyan, Annis, Will, Gwaine, Uther, Morgana Rating: Teen and Up Word count: 51,105 Summary: When due to a lucky coincidence, ballet dancer Merlin gets the chance play the the role of White and Black Swan in Swan Lake, he is beyond elated. That is until he realises he will be dancing alongside the golden boy of Camelot Ballet, Arthur Pendragon - an arrogant twat and Merlin's personal nemesis. Can they overcome their differences, or will their mutual animosity destroy the production and their career?

Story and Art are here | Reblog on Tumblr here *** Title: Sugar Sweet Serendipities Author: chaosgenes Artist: sunfall_ennien Pairings/Characters: Merlin/Arthur, Leon/Morgana Rating: Explicit Word count: 48,851 Summary: Arthur Du Bois, CEO of The RoundTable, is a stubborn, self-made man and comfortably well off. Yet, after a few encounters with a certain stranger, he unexpectedly lands himself a sugar daddy. Merlin is twelve years his senior, a modern gentleman, the last of the great Emryson family line, and unimaginably rich.

Coincidences bring them together and love blooms, but each holds a secret that may very well end their budding romance. What they don't know is that it both involves PD Corp’s CEO, Uther Pendragon.

Story and Art are here | Reblog on Tumblr here

[lxvsiick]

THE STARS ARE SHINING BRIGHTLY | HAN TAESAN X READER

[PART 2 -- VERSION 2]

PAIRING: ex! han taesan x ex! fem! reader

SUMMARY: After running into his ex, Y/n, Taesan chases after her--and what happens after was all he could ever wish for.

GENRE: fluff?, angst?, exes, imagine

WORDCOUNT: 1.1k

A/N: i guess everyone deserves a happy ending 😒 jk ,, i apologize for the pain i have caused 🙇🏻‍♀️ btw pink and blue go so well together — i love how the title turned out

❝ ❞ ✧ ೃ༄

Every step felt heavy with anticipation, each breath a mix of excitement and anxiety. He didn’t know what he’d say or what he hoped to find, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that this was a chance he couldn’t let slip by.

Finally, he spotted her again, standing on the corner, waiting for a bus. With a deep breath, he approached, trying to steady his racing heart.

“Y/n!” he called out, trying to keep his voice calm and steady.

She turned, a look of surprise crossing her face as she recognized the urgency in his voice. Her eyes widened as they met his, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. Everything around them seemed to disappear and it was only them there. Y/n’s look of surprise turns into a smile, her sparkling eyes meeting him.

“Hi.”

“It’s been a while,” he said, his voice low, struggling to keep his emotions in check. He took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. “How... how have you been?”

She gave a small, distant smile. “I’ve been doing better, actually. A lot better. Things are finally looking up.”

Taesan nodded, though her words twisted in his chest. Seeing her happy without him felt like a double-edged sword—he wanted this for her, but it hurt to realize he wasn’t part of her happiness anymore.

“That’s good to hear,” he managed. “I’m really happy for you.” A pause hung between them before he continued, his voice dropping to a more vulnerable tone. “Idol life has been good for me, too, I guess. But... I’ve missed you. You’ve never left my mind. Not once.”

Her smile faltered as she listened, her eyes softening as his words sunk in. She didn’t say anything, but the way she looked at him spoke of memories they both shared, memories that still lingered.

“I regret everything I did,” he continued, his voice thick with emotion. “The way things ended... I keep replaying it in my mind, wishing I could have done things differently. Better. I’ve thought about you so much, and I’ve been kicking myself every day for letting you go.”

She remained silent, her gaze steady but full of emotion.

“Have you... have you ever missed me?” His voice was barely above a whisper now, laced with a desperate kind of hope.

For a moment, she didn’t answer, her eyes dropping to the ground. But when she spoke, her voice was small, fragile. “I did... I still do.”

His heart jumped at her words. His chest tightened with a hope he hadn’t allowed himself to feel in months. “Then... maybe... maybe we could try again?” he asked, stepping closer to her, his heart on the line. “I promise, I’ll do better this time. I’ll be the person you deserve. Just... give me another chance.”

She looked up at him, uncertainty and love battling in her expression. They stood there, the weight of their shared history hanging between them. Her eyes searched his, and for a moment, it felt like the world stopped.

“I never stopped loving you,” she said quietly, her words tentative, as if she was afraid of what might come next.

He swallowed hard, feeling like his heart might burst. “I never stopped loving you either.”

After what felt like an eternity, she nodded, her eyes filled with both fear and hope. “Okay,” she whispered. “We can try again.”

Relief washed over him, his chest swelling with hope and gratitude. He couldn’t help the smile that broke across his face, genuine and full of emotion. “Thank you,” he breathed. “I promise, I’ll make it right this time.”

As they stood there, the weight of their past seemed to fade into the background, leaving only the possibility of a future together.

❝ ❞ ✧ ೃ༄

The night sky stretched endlessly above, a canvas of twinkling stars that reflected in Y/n’s eyes as she stood on the private balcony, her hands resting gently on the railing. The cool evening breeze played with the curls of her long hair, causing strands to dance around her face. She wore a stunning cream-colored dress that flowed elegantly in the wind, perfectly complementing the glow of the moonlight that bathed her in a soft, ethereal light.

It was a perfect night—peaceful, serene. But a soft sound from behind pulled her from her thoughts. She turned, her gaze falling on Taesan, who was walking towards her, a bouquet of white daisies—her favorite flowers—held in his hands. The sight of him, standing there with that warm, familiar smile, made her heart skip a beat.

"These are for you," he said softly as she walked up to him. His voice was gentle, filled with a tenderness that never seemed to fade, even after all these years.

She took the bouquet, her fingers brushing against his for a brief moment, sending a spark through her. "You remembered," she said, her voice barely above a whisper, her smile lighting up her face.

"How could I ever forget?" he replied with a playful smile, his eyes locked on hers.

Suddenly, music filled the air. She blinked in surprise as the rest of the BOYNEXTDOOR members popped out from behind the door, Sungho strumming a guitar while the others began dancing in sync, clearly having rehearsed this. Laughter bubbled up from her chest as she turned back to him, her heart swelling with affection and love.

But Taesan gently pulled her attention back to him, his hands wrapping around hers as the music continued. His expression grew serious, his eyes soft as he gazed down at her. "These last four years with you... they’ve been the best of my life," he began, his voice full of emotion. "I will always regret letting you go the first time, and I can’t thank you enough for giving us another chance."

Her breath hitched as his words sunk in, her heart racing as she saw the shift in his expression.

"And now," he continued, his voice catching slightly as he dropped down on one knee. The world seemed to slow down around her as he pulled out a small velvet box from his pocket and opened it, revealing a delicate, sparkling ring inside. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Tears instantly brimmed in her eyes as she looked down at him, the love she felt for him overwhelming her. She couldn’t speak for a moment, her throat tight with emotion. All she could do was nod, her tears spilling over as she whispered, "Yes, of course."

The members behind them erupted into cheers, with one of the members dramatically clutching his chest. "Finally! She’s taking him off our hands!" they joked, their voices full of joy as the others continued playing and dancing in celebration.

Laughing through her tears, Y/n dropped to her knees in front of Taesan, pulling him into a tight embrace, her heart full and her future clear. They had found each other again, and this time, they weren’t letting go.

❝ ❞ ✧ ೃ༄

PART ONE | PART TWO VER.1 | MASTERLIST

© ALL RIGHTS RESERVED, lxvsiick, 2024

[izzyspussy]

anyway so seasons 1-early 3 mickey is a pessimist with a dash of nihilist (miserable), and because of that ian looks like an optimist verging on idealist to him.

the fact of the matter is that ian is not an optimist and he certainly is not an idealist. he's a little naive, sure, but less than what would be appropriate for his age. he's also not a pessimist or a nihilist (either kind). or a realist or a pragmatist or any of those.

no, ian is quite simply. unfathomably stubborn. and that is all.

he'll get into west point. he's absolutely certain of this. why? because he fucking said so.

he'll have a real relationship with mickey. they are in love and they are going to be together. this is true. how does he know? because. he. fucking. said so.

he doesn't have hope. he doesn't want things. that's pussy shit. there are precisely three types of things in this world: things ian isn't interested in, things ian already has, and things ian will have. that is simply that!

(which is obviously its own very specific mindset and is at least as extreme as pure optimism and pure pessimism, and is almost certainly just another fun little factor when the force of his will alone is not enough to change the reality of an ongoing traumatic event that contributes to the somewhat early onset of his bipolar disorder. but that's tangential.)

now. once again, disclaimer, these characters cease to exist past early season 5 for me, so there's every chance this next bit is exclusive to MY mickey and ian. there's just no way to know ❤️

that said. ian matures into a nihilist (carefree) - and i would say he's here-ish already in season 4, but in a maladaptive way at that stage - and then eventually matures further into a nihilistic (carefree)-leaning pragmatist.

mickey on the other hand - after a period of having no particular mindset of this type of thing at all which in effect amounts to a months-to-a-year long panic attack where his every action is fueled by emotional desperation and he has no solid concept of his own wants, needs, values, or future beyond the ever-present but totally incoherent certainty that he can't live without ian but ian can and will leave him with ease for even the slightest infraction or failure that terrorizes him like a weasel terrorizes a hen in his every waking moment - um. what was i saying.

oh right. mickey on the other hand, after All That, matures first into a sort of quiet idealism (kind of a pendulum swing maybe, but not quite not also progress, iygiygi), and then. into a less naive version of the old ian's way lmao.

there is no "that's how things are/go" or "that's how the world works" or "life is/isn't fair" or any fundamental human nature or any purpose or lack thereof to life or possible and impossible or likely and unlikely or anything else along any of those lines. there are only two types of things in the world: things that don't matter and mickey's next achievement. and that's that, baby!

and then eventually, mick finishes out at a relatively stable and sustainable realist-leaning optimism, heavily informed by romanticism of the Certain Things Are Meant To Be kind. like, he wouldn't necessarily express that or think of it in those terms. and he doesn't think it's a common thing, in fact it's rare and special and he's very lucky, and even if something is like that it still doesn't mean you don't have to put the work in for it to go well and end up Right. and he doesn't believe in a higher power or in Fate quite as such or in the will of the universe or a cosmic balance or anything like that really.

it's just, you know. sometimes. every now and then. there's just this one little thing that will continuously keep trying to happen without any heed to sense or logic or the incredible odds against it. just something in particular that will forever and always find a way to happen.

like say. for example. there's this gay kid, right? and he gets in this fight and he wins and he's about to bring down a tire iron and ruin this other idiot's pretty face and - for no discernible reason whatsoever - he just... doesn't. and maybe he'll think about it half a dozen years later and wonder why. that one tiny little thing that changed his whole fucking life, why did he do that? what was the reason? and there just. isn't one.

and that's not even all. see, these two dumbasses have no idea the other one is gay too, but some-fucking-how they don't have to say a word or even make any opening moves to just Know they want each other. it's like they read each other's fucking minds, even though he knows, he remembers, he didn't sense anything from ian. but for Some Fucking Reason he just never for a second considered ian wouldn't want him, and ian was in perfect time with him. and maybe he'll think back and try to find an explanation for this part too. was there some body language he read? was there some look in ian's eyes? but the answer is no every time.

and then after that, these two gay kids just can't be kept apart. they just can't. and it's not just that they inexplicably can't resist each other either. every time they're separated they find each other again, no matter what. even when they're the ones to separate themselves, situation after coincidence after happenstance after necessity keeps putting them in each other's orbits. secrecy and jealous exes and gun violence and imprisonment and infidelity and a fucking pathological fear of intimacy and conversion therapy and genuine threat to their lives and marriage to someone else and permanent life-altering illness can't break them up. at least not for long.

and then. somehow. SOME fucking how! after all that, and with the absolutely shit chances that they ever even hooked up in the first place, they actually fucking make it? they don't just get to be together, they get to be happy??

so no, he doesn't believe in god or destiny or soulmates or whatever the fuck. but at the same time, i mean. what other explanation is there?

[twopoppies]

Hey gina 🥹 I was casually listening to some songs by Harry and Louis, and something in my brain just clicked.

I can’t explain how but, we always talk about the way Harry’s lyrics are very complex to decipher, and most of the times we don’t get to hear the context. (It’s very very rare to get a say from him)

But he writes songs in such a way that you can exactly imagine who he is singing about.. He is not singing about a casual heartbreak, he sings like a real shit storm surged through him. He sings love songs for years and it ALWAYS sounds like he is singing to the same person, and this person’s presence has just been there for years.

And the narrative of this person is just very unique in a way that, in some songs, it only makes sense if this person is physically very close to Harry but still at the same time very far away from him. (Struggles of dating your bandmate) I relate this to “Meet me in the Hallway” so much. He sings “Meet me in the Hallway, I just left your bedroom... Just let me know I’ll be at the door” Harry is insanely close to this person physically (they are probably literally a hallway apart) and he still thinks it’s very hard to reach them. (I’m guessing the song came from the 1D times where boys got their own bedrooms, because Harry sings “your bedroom” and the whole song screams “I’m not at home” energy. It just gives cold hotel vibes..)

And I listen to “Something Great” and then I listen to “Sweet Creature” and it is just clear as a day that these songs aren’t for random women he is supposedly dating. All I can hear from his songs that he is still mad at the same person, in love with the same person, happy or sad with the same person because it’s not a random person, he knows them very very well. And of course the line in “To be so lonely” where he sings “Don’t blame me for falling I was just a little boy” is one of the obvious examples that shows he is been in this situation for a looong time. Same thing with Louis but his songs are more open, lyric wise, to talk about a story, for example “Saturdays”. But as we all know that’s probably the reason why we had El for years (it keeps the timeline accurate actually) cuz everyone with a brain can understand he sings about the same person for years 💀

sorry for the long rant but these are the hard core reasons why I am still choosing to believe in their love. I don’t know if they are still together or not (from Louis’ last album I did sense trouble..) but I’m hoping they are both happy :) especially after the EURO 2024 meeting:D

Yeah. Very much agreed. Maybe not so much about FITF, but everything else for sure.

[nitw]

the whole sigcorp franchise is about grief -- life, death, grief, and moving on. but i really appreciate how each game handles the topic differently and paints a new perspective of it via the characters in focus:

in to the moon, johnny struggles to cope with a loss and a sense of guilt he can't rationalize. the game asks if it's fair for johnny to be happy if his happiness outweighs the real memories and consequences of the life he lived... but ultimately, it's not up for the doctors (or us) to decide -- johnny's love for river was real, and that mattered to him more than anything else deep down. nothing could change that fact, and he subconsciously held onto it, even as the fabric of reality broke down around him.

in finding paradise, colin struggles to accept his own life coming to an end despite having little to no regrets, and uses fantasy as an excuse to justify his dissatisfaction. the game asks if there's any clear difference between "real" memories and "the fiction we tell ourselves"... but when so much of our lives is fueled by a natural fear of death and loneliness, the distinction barely matters. every moment can be meaningful if you just want it to be, even if it's in retrospect. even the little things.

in impostor factory, lynri struggles with seeing worth in her own life, yet simultaneously does everything she can to leave a lasting mark on the world -- while quincy struggles to be her anchor, as he becomes increasingly aware that they can't live a normal life together. the game asks if lynri has the right to be selfish and pursue her goals at the expense of any chance at happiness with quincy, or if quincy has the right to be selfish and keep lynri grounded if that just seals her fate... but there's no correct answer to that. life is too complicated for there to be a singular, perfect thread of choices. sometimes pain is unavoidable, so all you can do is make the most of what you have while it still lasts.

and every time, these dilemmas are directly mirrored through eva and neil. it always circles back to the hypocritical nature of what sigcorp does, to eva putting on a strong face and trying to see these issues in black and white to protect herself, to neil genuinely believing in the value of his work but failing to take his own advice.

i think the beach episode was the perfect conclusion to all of this. we don't know how eva's gonna carry on now... but we have to imagine that she is. we have to hold onto that hope, for her sake and for our own. we, the audience, have to accept this as the end of the series, and believe that the moment we press the escape key, eva accepts it as well.

these fictional people's lives meant something to us. and if there was hope for them, there's hope for us, too.

[flowersforchoso]

Grandmaster and I.

cw: enemies to lovers(?), power imbalance, fluff if you squint, a love triangle trope if you squint harder. female reader a/n: i've had this sitting in my drafts for the longest and only now decided to post. also, english isn't my first language, so bear with me regarding any grammar errors or weird construction/phrasing. thankue

the lin kuei trio was on a mission when you attacked them. they trespassed on your turf, and you ambitiously tried to take out all three of them at once, failing unsurprisingly since you were no match for the skilled assassins.

you're easily subdued and taken captive, dispossessed of your weapons and barraged with interrogations. after discovering you don't pose much of a threat, they deliberate on what to do with you, ultimately deciding to keep you around as a maidservant of sorts.

you're subjected to demeaning labour in and around the lin kuei base, tasked with all manner of chores. you're the designated errand girl. you hate it here

a period of close monitoring has elapsed, and the grandmaster, out of the goodness of his heart, deems it fit to convert you into one of the grunts, the lowest ranked. he believes your sheer will and rudimentary fighting skills would be beneficial to the clan, no matter how small.

so you're set on the path to becoming a part of the lin kuei. once just a lowly rogue turned maid, now subject to tedious training to become a full-fledged assassin.

while you impress since you have a background in combat, you're still not up to par with the clan's standards. but there's a development: a new relationship emerges.

you and tomas have begun to be on friendly terms. it's not that surprising, considering his personality and you both being on the younger side—a connection was bound to form

casual greetings turned into sparring together, and progressed to going hunting. together

bihan notices the budding... friendship, (if he could call it that) that's supposedly going on between you two and isn't pleased by it, but turns a blind eye instead. it doesn't concern him

it isn't until he sees you both return from a hunt (engaging in tomas' pastime) while holding hands, then later in a compromising position—with you ontop of him to conclude a training session—that he decides to take matters into his hands. such salacious behaviour was prohibited on lin kuei grounds, he had enough of your impudence

you're forbidden from training with smoke, but not without a lengthy verbal lashing first. you find it unfair and voice your displeasure, which he interprets as insubordination

you're punished with running a couple of laps and close to a hundred pushups. he won't go easy on you just because you happen to be a woman, despite protests from kuai liang in the background

you detest him for alot of things, but mostly for coming between the only interaction that was keeping you sane in this hellish place. he isn't fond of you either, as he finds you rather incompetent, ill-bred, impertinent.

the time has come to take your training to the next level: missions. it's your first to properly evaluate your skills, and you're nothing short of excited, hoping to be paired with tomas

however, bihan senses your enthusiasm as rather devious and pairs you up with himself instead, shattering your hopes. and this becomes the case with subsequent missions

for a lack of better words, you're attached to his hip. you've become his personal project of sorts. he wants to forge you into a warrior you'll never be on your own merit and thinks you and tomas are distracting eachother, enforcing distance between the both of you

your training henceforth is with him only. he's always on the defensive while you attack, but it seems you can never land a hit, no matter what you do.

cue the outpouring of criticisms and scoldings, laced with threats of sending you back to scrubbing floors if you fail to improve and you fight back tears as the harsh words tumble out of his mouth effortlessly

but you refuse to allow his condescension bother you for long. instead, you turn it around for good as motivation to do better. you go the extra mile with training, and in due time, it yields positive results—you've tremendously improved. and finally get rewarded with the lin kuei uniform, marking your official initiation into the ranks.

during the ceremony, the grandmaster's eyes are fixed on you. once it's over and done with, he summons your presence. in private.

you know where this is going and there are no surprises when he finally opens his mouth to query you—you slightly modified the lin kuei uniform to fit your fashion sensibilities, sticking out like a sore thumb amongst the new initiates.

rather than cower in fear when his judgemental eyes peer into yours, demanding an explanation for your indiscretion, you meet his eyes in defiance, stating your reason as an aesthetic choice.

bihan is not the least bit surprised by your little rebellion, and for some reason, he lets it slide (a first for him) only dismissing you with a vague warning to know your limits, which has you fighting the urge to roll your eyes.

the days roll by... you've adjusted quite nicely to your new identity, even going as far as shedding your old appearance to blend into the predominantly male environment—you cut your hair short. unbeknownst to you, your new appearance has achieved the opposite effect: accentuated your feminine charms instead of diminish it

the grandmaster obviously notices this change, but doesn't comment on your business.

however, he doesn't understand why he's suddenly become aware of anything concerning you that he would normally not care for such as how subtly flirty foes become in the heat of combat with you

or tomas lingering stare on you, which you reciprocate with a longing of your own

or johnny's unwanted presence and comments upon seeing you, dubbing you the lin kuei eyecandy

or is it his brother softly praising you for your quick thinking while on a mission?

even his attitude towards you has slowly shifted—he doesn't speak to you as harshly, doesn't shut down your requests for needing breaks.

not to mention, how his eyes keep wandering in your direction for reasons unknown to him. your mere presence is becoming rather bothersome when it wasn't much of an issue before.

bi-han wants to put a stop to whatever this is, and his plans to resolve his personal dilemma comes as a shock, not just to you, but to kuai liang and tomas as well

out of nowhere, you're reassigned from active duty to the administrative sphere. according to him, while your skills are formidable, they're needed elsewhere. so in a nutshell, you were practically being demoted

he doesn't provide more reasons for this decision despite his brothers attempts to cajole an answer from him, and citing how much of an asset you were on the battlefield.

his words were final, and there you were—not even back to square one. for you were neither seen nor heard of, just lost among a sea of cogs in a machinery

the passage of time has flown rather quickly since then, bringing attendant changes—both bad and good ones

kuai liang and tomas have charted a new course; they left the lin kuei after a series of disputes with bi-han concerning his leadership and vision

and this saddened you when the news reached your ears, especially because tomas never deemed it fit to inform you or include you in his plans. while you were forbidden from interacting with him, he could still find a way to communicate with you if he wanted to

you're hurt by this, but you know it's probably incomparable to how bi-han must've felt about having his brothers turn their backs on him.

since you've been demoted and now in a limited position, you've not had any proximity to him. infact, you barely see him outside of general morning assembly and drills.

a part of you wants to know how he's fairing with this new development, so you decide to go to him where you know you'll no doubt find him—the meeting room, at dusk.

with a teacup in hand, you braved the door that holds the domineering figure within. knocking softly, tentatively; you hear an intimidating, "enter." inhaling sharply, you step inside

bi-han is a bit taken aback by your presence though his expression doesn't betray this. he is stoic and composed, as always

"i did not request your presence." he coldly states matter-of-factly, making you gulp. a slight tremble to your fingers as you clutch the teacup closer to your chest

"yes, you did not" you affirm. "but i thought it appropriate to see you after learning of recent events." you proceed to gently set the teacup on the table, his unblinking stare fixed on you

"i don't need your coddling or anyone else's for that matter." he sneers, clearly insulted by your gesture but you don't let it affect you as much.

"i know you don't need anyone or anything" you utter in hushed tones, speaking more to yourself than him before continuing, "but... just accept this, please."

your appeal is met with complete silence, and without feeling like you've overstayed your welcome, you bow your head slightly. "i'll be on my way now." you announce, taking to your heels, and gliding past numerous masked lin kuei members on the corridor as you head towards your station.

the tea you served bi-han remained untouched. and by morning, it was cleared from the table. but the days after that empathetic move of yours ushered in many surprises...

it was nighttime, the sky outside pitch black, when an invitation was sent to your quarters in the form of bi-han himself, standing tall by your doorframe, towering and imposing, requesting you to accompany him on a... stroll?

you barely had time to process what was happening in the moment. your fingers reached to adjust the neckline of your robe, showcasing your nervousness—a movement that didn't escape his piercing gaze—before going along with him

of course, since it was close to midnight, the base wasn't teeming with much activity, as most of the lin kuei members had already retired for the night, so your nightly engagement went mostly unnoticed as you walked alongside him. the cool night air brushing past your skin

he doesn't say much to you, and you don't either, besides a few curt responses here and there when he asked about your duties and such.

before you knew what was happening, you were right back to your living quarters with bi-han escorting you. you bid him goodnight, to which he nodded and went about his way.

you're still in shock, in disbelief at what had occurred, and the awkwardness of it all preoccupied your mind for days on end. you desired answers to a barrage of questions that circled your mind. but the answers did not come until several nightly engagements later....

following tender touches under the gleaming moonlight