#imr losing my mind

[darkfictionjude]

How come?! In my school days, there was the "popular" (likable) girl trio 💀, I am from LATAM thou.

I was part of big schools that have all the grades, from kindergarten to the last year of high school. In my first school, I didn't interact with them, but they were all really cool and chill, I don't know if it's because I was young and short, but for me, they were tall too and part of the school band (we Don't have cheers in school here, just in college, so the band was the coolest kids in my young mind), they were know because of the band, close relationships with the teachers and helping around in the school's events, if I don't remember wrong, one of them was the granddaughter or "grandniece" of the school owner.

I changed school in the last year of "primary school" ( here is the 5th grade), so I remember the birth and death of the girl trio more vividly(?) (Read: when they graduated). There was the passage of 3 trios until I got in high school. Just one of these tried to be the mean girls trio, but this made them lose popularity quickly. This trio was of the "rich parents" category and, sadly, had really poor emotional education. They acted so superior, like the school was theirs, at the beginning not so much, but when people began to fawn them, they began showing their personality. I knew them more cause one of my close friends dated one of these girls for some time (4 months, broke up cause he was childish for her, like: girl he's almost 3 years younger, his height doesn't mean he is mature 💀). They were so impolite with the school cleaners and helpers, too, i have a lot of icky just remembering. The reason the trio "lost their girl trio crown" was that one of them got suspended for screaming with one of the cleaners, parents didn't like the school attitude and transferred her. The other girls became very quiet after this, so I don't remember what happened with them.

My grade/high school time girl trio were just social butterflies and artistic talented, two sang really well and the other knew to play violin, and did ballet and swimming (i know that cause i was in swimming class too, i was not a stalker T T). They won first place in every cultural fair they participated in, so they were know in school cause of this, if not by name by face. They were conventional latina and afro-latina pretty, nice and polite in general. Basically, cute extroverted besties that didn't stop in a place for so long, and whenever they passed, people "swarmed" them with greetings and small talk. I felt drained just watching T T

In conclusion, I want to express that in my experience, there was the girl trio in high school, be it likable one or an infamous one. Usually, not the mean girls in the movies, just extroverted and helpful girls. I asked more cause the town feels small, so high school "society" would have been even smaller, and having two more trusted friends that she walked around would make some sense, not like Queen George herself but something less dramatic/grandiose(?). Thank you for answering ♡

Talking about high school, has anyone already asked about the main cast's parents' high school years? If not, I would love to know if it's not spoilery

Nonnie while I do like hearing stories I really didn’t need that entire background 💀 it was personal info that is best suited to say to me in my personal blog as it had not much to do with the story but your own personal high school experience 💜

No one asks much because the parents are tertiary characters so I think it’s only logical there’s not much info asked about them here. I can’t say much about mc’s parents. Or Nia’s mother. Imre’s father came to town in grade 9, he was on the football team and his mother was president of the student council. Lorcan’s dad dropped out of high school in 10th grade and his mom dropped out soon after getting pregnant with Lorcan

[prinx-quail]

Hell yeahhhhh! The TINIEST lords with the SMALLEST lil brains

Ikr? Dude had it all.... A pretty butterfly wing cape, a LOT of legs to get around on (in more ways than one) muscle and CAKE for days and then just? The nanosecond he got his ass stuck to a chair it was ALL over

Aw dude (,=>=), that means the world to me fr.... I'm so glad you like my art!

Imr? Anguish is really out here LOSING their mind over literally nothing. They just had some big feelings and could NOT handle them

Dude your joke was so top tier i couldn't NOT draw it at some point. Now all the world may witness your comedic genius! >:D

Lords but little? Please :>

*CONSUMES ALL ART AND GETS TUMMY ACHE*

*hands you a tums*

The King will gladly grant your wish of seeing the little lords! He has a portrait album

Diligence is the first in the book, and was an only child for some time in my verse. The king was QUITE the looker back then, as well.

Then Odious and Mirth manifested at about the same time and got along just about as well as one would expect

Anguish showed up late and was a bit of a surprise. The poor beast was so frail, colicky, and sickly, too. The king ended up hiring Green on as a nanny (she was something of an honorary lord as she was standing in for Anguish until they grew old enough to take over their own court

Also credit to @sumi-sprite for this joke. It's going to be stuck in my mind forever

[waitingforminjae]

[thearrangment-phff]

LXXVI.

June 2019

On the beaches of France, Isabella watched as the dozens of family members gathered around the shore. Many holding their children trying to teach them to not fear water. Charlie was in the arms of Louis of Luxembourg, and Bertie in the arms of Johannes of Austria. Isabella was joined by some of her female cousins who decided to stay back from the chaos in lounge chairs.

When everyone was at the château, and even now, she was happy. Harry watched as his twin sons were thrown up into the air and his daughter in his arms smiled at all the commotion around her. Harry’s attention was not on her, but Maria-Anunciata of Liechtenstein noticed.

“Belle, we should go to Monaco tomorrow, have a girl’s night out or something,” suggested Maria-Anunciata.

“What about Milan?” asked Marie-Christine.

“I think Paris would be better,” added Marie-Astrid.

“What do you think about Marie-Gabrielle?” asked Isabella.

“Me?” asked Marie-Gabrielle of Nassau.

“Not you! I’m talking about Marie-Gabrielle von Acro,” replied Isabella.

“She’s a smart woman. All of her sisters went to ivy leagues in the states like you did,” stated Gabriella.

“Very tall,” added Marie-Gabrielle.

“Elle! What kind of answer is that?”

“Well it’s true! Marie-Gabrielle is almost as tall as Tony and we all know I barely reach his shoulders,” argued Marie-Gabrielle.

“Do you think they’ll get married before the end of the year?” asked Isabella.

“No doubt. Look at them now. Like lovesick puppies,” announced Charlotte.

The group of women looked to see Wenceslas whispering something into Marie-Gabrielle von Acro’s ear and she had laughed. They looked happy. Maybe they could learn to love each other, thought Isabella.

“Who cares about Wenceslas, let’s get away from everything and just have a couple of days to ourselves. And no children! While I love Zeno to death I need to get away and remember that I am more than just a mother,” said Marie-Gabrielle of Nassau.

“Is it really that bad?” asked Maria-Anunciata.

“Zeno is a lovely baby and I would not speak ill of him but sometimes you just need to get away and take a breather. You lose yourself after a while. Belle, I can’t even imagine what you must be going through. I only have one, one-year-old. You have three children under two,” explained Marie-Gabrielle of Nassau.

“Harry and Christine have been a big help,” answered Isabella.

“She’s being modest. It’s hard and with Belle’s two pregnancies it’s a miracle she is here,” smiled Luisa Maria.

“Not exactly.” mumbled Isabella.

“We need a couple of days to spend with each other. Come on! Just like old times.”

“What about the château? It’s close to Paris,” asked Kathleen.

“That’s a good idea. We could spend a night in Paris.”

“Belle, what do you say?” asked Alexandra.

“Chambord is always open to any of you. We can leave Friday and have a weekend trip.”

The woman nodded all together, “Maybe Charlotte will finally tell us about Ferdinand.”

The group went into small laughs as they joined together to tease the youngest of the cousins. Charlotte was still a teenager and they all remember gathering at the christening of Charlotte and her brother Leopold. Now she was 19 with a boyfriend who was all too familiar in the family.  

Ferdinand von Habsburg should have been Emperor of Austria, King of Hungary, Bohemia, and Croatia one day. But the monarchy was abolished and years later his father married a Baroness-heiress. Ferdinand went without titles, but not without money. His relationship with a Princess of Nassau had pleased many. Should he marry her the marriage would no doubt be considered dynastic, something pretenders to former thrones always have in the back of their mind even if they said they didn’t care for it.

Charlotte was valuable. She was the daughter of a Luxembourgish Prince and a great-great-granddaughter of Queen Victoria-Eugenie of Spain. She had Kings of Spain, Belgium, Denmark, England, and Sweden in her family tree. Of course, neither Ferdinand or Charlotte cared for any of that, but Isabella cared. The innocent and young Charlotte needed to be protected in Isabella’s eyes.

“The moment everyone stops seeing me a little girl,” smiled Charlotte earning herself even more sarcastic remarks from her cousins.  

Harry walked back to his wife handing her Mary-Astrid, “I think she’s hungry.”

Isabella got up from her seat fixing her grip on her daughter, “That means Charlie and Bertie are going to be hungry too. Try and feed them and see how that goes.”

“I’ll take Louis with me,” nodded Harry.

“How is the weaning?” asked Gabriella.

“Good and bad. Some days they’re fine with food but once night time hits they won’t even take a bottle,” answered Isabella.

“I can help you with that. I have the same problem with Constantin,” offered Marie-Christine.

“I can help too! Victoria got very fussy because of growth sprouts. Are Charlie and Bertie in one right now?” asked Gabriella.

“I think they’re just about too. I read this stage is the clingy one,” spoke Harry.

The women raised their eyebrow at Harry’s comment, “I told you all that he’s been a big help.”

“I’m going to get Louis.”

Harry’s first stop was Isabella’s cousin Johannes of Austria who was holding Charlie. Once explaining to Louis that he was going to help Harry feed the twins the two men walked behind Isabella back into the house.

The task of feeding children was proving to be difficult for Louis whose own children were years older, “Okay I think it’s time to release you out of feeding duty,” laughed Harry.

“I’m just a little rusty after all these years. I can feed a baby Harry.”

“No, no, I need the food to go in Bertie’s mouth, not his face,” joked Harry.

“Alright I can take a hint! Who do I call in?”

“Alexander would be nice since Baudouin is only slightly older than the twins.”

“And if Alexander can’t? Imre?”

“Imre would be a good backup. Thank you Louis for your help.”

“Anything for Isabella. Plus she introduced me to Marie so I owe her for that.”

“Oh, so that’s going good? You don’t really mention anything,” wondered Harry.

“It’s going amazing. In all honesty, I thought Johannes wouldn’t like me but I guess whatever Anunciata is telling him is working,” beamed Louis.

“Johannes?” asked Harry.

“Johannes is Marie’s older brother. You knew that. If I marry her than our children and Johannes would be both first and second cousins. Funny when it’s said out loud,” laughed Louis.

Right. Harry forgot that Isabella’s family practices those types of marriages. Harry just nodded and put his attention back to his sons just as Isabella walked back into the room, “Where is Louis?”

“Failing miserably at feeding Bertie so I asked Alexander to come and help me.”

“I can help. Mary-Astrid is with my mother and aunts.”

Isabella sat down next to Harry picking up the mashed up baby food that Isabella’s aunt Margaretha had been kind enough to make food for all of the babies in the family.

“Being alone like this feels so weird,” commented Harry.

“I know. Ever since the anniversary, we were surrounded by dozens of people. We only spent one night there before we all drove here. I don’t even think we’re spending tomorrow night here in Cabasson.”

“Where are we going now?”  

“I think some of the boys wanted to go to Ceuta, Spain again. Then spend a day or two in Marbella, Spain. Tony’s family... or I think his sister-in-law owns this huge property there. It’s were Tony and Elle married remember. But the girls and I are going on our own little trip to Paris and no kids.”

“I’ll be stuck with the kids? I don’t think I can do that,” said Harry in a slight panic.

“I believe in you,” laughed Isabella.

“How long would you be gone?”

“Just a couple of days. All the kids will be with their fathers so you won’t be completely alone.”

“While you all are in Paris, where will we be?”

“I don’t know. You all should go to Austria and I could offer you Schwarzau-am-Steinfeld to stay in. Wilfersdorf I think would be too small considering the number of children,” suggested Isabella.

“I’ll talk to them about it.”

“Before I forget we are ending the holiday in Argentina.”

“What? South America?”

“Well it was going to be Brazil as guests of some of the Brazilian princes but health concerns stopped that trip.”

“Isabella I can’t be gone from London too long,” stated Harry.

“You won’t. This would only be a week trip. You’ll be back by the 22nd of this month.”

“Okay. Fine.”

“I would never take you away for very long,” spoke Isabella.

“I understand that.”

“You made it seem like I wanted to take you away forever,” questioned Isabella.

“No, no. It’s just a lot in a short period of time I guess.”

“We’re coming back in August by the way.”

“To Cabasson?”

“No, I don’t think so. I think we may meet at Chambord then depart from there. Since there a two-month gap I don’t think anything is set in stone.”

Before Harry could answer Imre popped in his head into the kitchen, “Hey are you two done? Christoph has an announcement.”

“Let me guess Adelaide is pregnant?” asked Isabella.

“Well I don't know, but I think so,” answered Imre.

“Damn. My bet was with Alexander and Luisa,” mumbled Harry as he picked up Charlie, “Well Charlie is all done. How about you take him and go hear the announcement. I’ll finish feeding Bertie.”

“Are you sure?”

“Christoph is your brother after all,” replied Harry.

“He’s your brother-in-law. This will be another one of our niece or nephew.”

“Go on ahead without me, I’m sure. I can still see what’s going on from the window.”

“I’ll leave the door open so you can hear too,” added Imre before going back to the crowd.

The entire family was gathered around Christoph and Adelaide who announced they were expecting their third child and it was a girl. Everyone turned to Johannes and Maria Anunciata to see if they have any news to add.

“I haven’t even married for a month! Vultures!” yelled Maria Anunciata.

“Our honeymoon is barely even over!” added Johannes.

[twostepsfromtemerant]

Reconnecting

@kvothbloodless I gift unto you a Mola/Devi fic for the gift exchange. Enjoy!

After the testing of Kvothe’s gram, Mola wanted to head back to her room in Mews and sleep for a  full day, but something stopped her. Her mind was going in a million different directions, but kept coming back to one thing. “I borrowed some money from a galet named Devi… Accused her of malfeasance...” How stupid, or desparate must he have been to go to Devi, and then accuse her? She could hold a grudge longer than anyone else Mola knew, and had the resources and sense of self-preservation to make someone suffer. Mola had to talk to her.

She went back to her room just long enough to get a heavier cloak and money pouch. She knew she ought to bring a gift of some sort, but her room was barren of personal effects. It wasn’t yet late enough for all shops to be closed; she could pick up something in Imre when she got there. Wrapping the cloak around her shoulders, she set off on the walk across the river.

As luck would have it, there was a shop selling candies and other sweets on the route to Devi’s apartment. She tried not to smile too much as she purchased the box of chocolates. There. Now she had something to fortify herself with, to put her in Devi’s good graces before bringing up Kvothe. The two of  the had been close while Devi was still at the University, but that was years ago. Mola wasn’t sure what it would be like between them now.

She hesitated at the mouth of the alley that would lead her to Devi. No thought had gone into this trip, Mola didn’t know what it would be like to see Devi. Before she could lose her nerve, Mola climbed the stairs and knocked on the door.

It swung open to reveal a well-lit room full of books, comfy chairs, and other objects of comfort. Devi stood in the doorway, a puzzled look on her face.

“Mola?”

“Hey, Devi,” she said. “Yeah, it’s me. May I come in?”

Devi stepped to the side, sweeping out her arm in a welcome gesture. “Of course! I’m sorry I don’t look more presentable, and my rooms are a mess… I wasn’t expecting anyone. Especially not you.”

Mola stepped into the room, appraising everything. “You seem to be doing well for yourself. You’ve turned your abilities to threaten people while looking pretty into a career.”

“There are always desperate people,” Devi responded, a hard edge creeping into her voice. “When there are desperate people, there are always others to help them, or make their situation worse. And for some reason, they always mistake a pretty face for weakness. I am no less dangerous than a man.”

“Anyone who thinks you less dangerous than a man is sadly mistaken. And there is no one, man, woman, or anyone else who could rival your pretty face.”

“You flatter me,” Devi replied lightly. “Come, sit down. What brings you here?”

Mola paused, unsure of how to breach the topic.

“Based on the pained expression on your face, I’m guessing you’re here for business.” Devi’s voice snapped Mola out of her thoughts.

“Ah, well, yes. I bought you chocolates?” She thrust the box out towards Devi. She took the box, apprehension clear on her face. Mola ran her hands down her legs twice, before twisting them together in front of her stomach. “Have you done business with a boy named Kvothe?”

Devi’s gaze snapped up to meet Mola’s. “Yes, I did. In the past. He is nothing to me now.” She spoke with cold fury that Mola had only heard once or twice before. She unconsciously took a step backwards.

“I know him, from the various trips he’s made to Medica. I only learned earlier tonight that he was… involved with you. He said he accused you of malfeasance. Is that true?”

“Yes. He accused me, we fought, I won, my business with him is done. I would never practice malfeasance against someone, or help anyone else do it. That is one line I will never cross. ”

“Devi, I know you are mad, but please hear me out on this. Someone actually was practicing malfeasance against him. When he confronted you, he hadn’t slept properly in at least a span, and had a dozen small hurts. He wasn’t in the best state, and since you do have a vial of his blood, it seemed like a good idea to him to confront you.” Devi opened her mouth as if to interrupt, but Mola held up a hand. “I’m not making excuses for him, but I need you to understand the whole story. Ambrose Jakis is the one who’s been attacking him.”

Horror dawned on Devi’s face. “That bastard!” she cried.

“I know,” Mola replied. “Just when you thought he couldn’t get any worse, he goes and does this. You don’t have to forgive Kvothe, but please try to understand the full situation.”

“Oh, I understand. I assume he’ll be finding a way to get revenge on Ambrose?”

“Yes, tomorrow night. It’s a clever plan.”

“I want in,” Devi said, her voice hard. “If that Jackass is going down, I need to be involved.”

Mola gave  a small smile. “I was hoping you’d say that. You were always one of the best sympathists…”

“And I still am.”

“Just as humble, I see.” Mola reached into her bag, pulling out several papers. “These are the notes, detailing the plan. You’ll be with me, but you should know the full plan. I’ve done the calculations for slippage, but check them over to be sure, and account for your own strength.”

Devi took the papers from Mola’s outstretched hand and looked them over briefly. “I trust your calculations, Mola. She put the papers on the desk to her left. “Now, since you’ve gone to the trouble of buying me chocolate, we might as well eat it. We can also toast to the suffering of Ambrose.”

They went into one of Devi’s other rooms, a more personal dining area. It was more organized than the outer room, but it was more personal. The books and decorations were less to show off and intimidate, and more for actual enjoyment. There were collections of plays, a well-worn set of playing cards, and a set of knitting needles that looked like they could also be knives.

Devi got a bottle of wine and two glasses from one the cupboards. She gestured for Mola to sit at the table, and then sat across from her. She poured the wine, and raised her glass in a toast. “Here’s to Ambrose finally getting what’s coming to him.” she said.

Mola raised her glass as well. “And to people united against a common enemy.” They both took a drink.

“As much as I appreciate the chocolate you bought me,” Devi began, “I have to ask, did you get them just to appease me before talking about Kvothe?”

Mola blushed. “Yes. I thought it would be harder for you to shoot the messenger if the messenger brought you gifts. Also, I remember how fond you are of them.”

Devi smiled. “How thoughtful. And I could never be truly mad at you. You were one of my closest friends when I was at the University. Speaking of that, tell me about it. What are you studying now? How are all your classes going?”

“I’m in Medica now; I switched shortly after you left. Arwyl’s tough, but I’ve learned so much, and I love what I’m studying. Maybe he’ll let me graduate before I die.”

“Still a stickler for the rules, huh?”

“Yeah. I know with medicine, it’s important to know everything before going out into the world, but sometimes it feels like too much. Besides, if he knew about half the times I’ve had to patch up Kvothe on the side, he would cut my required practical hours in half.”

The streets outside fell silent and the lamps burned low as Mola and Devi sat talking. They reminisced about the time spent together at the University, and their friendship. They laughed especially hard over the time Devi had stolen all of Hemme’s formal robes and scattered them over Mains. He had never found out who had done it, and was in a foul mood for a span.  Mola told anecdotes about Elodin, and Devi regaled her with the gossip of Imre. They bemoaned the unjust policies regarding women at the University.

“There are still so few women at the University,” Mola said sadly. “And Hemme is still a sexist prat. We’re all so afraid of being unfairly punished, that we don’t do anything to stand out. No one has your fire.” She reached out and touched Devi’s strawberry blonde hair, which glowed in the light.

Devi caught her hand, and held it. “I chose to fight my battles on the front line; don’t doubt that you are doing just as much by being the best damn student in the entire University.”

“I’ve missed you so much, these past years,” Mola whispered, leaning forward. “I should’ve visited sooner.”

“You’re here, now, that’s enough.” She met Mola in the middle, gently pressing their lips together. She pulled back after a moment, and asked, “Is this okay?”

Mola nodded. “More than okay. One of my few regrets is never kissing you when you were at the University.”

Devi brought Mola’s hand up to her mouth, briefly kissing the back of it. “You’re here now, and we can make up for lost time.”

[miss-bookworm]

Pass the happy! 💛 When you get this reply with 5 things that make you happy and send this to the last 10 people in your notifications :)

Thank you Lucy :) It feels appriopriate to answer this today because I’m having the best morning :)

1. My cats. Always

2. This fandom and all the amazing people I met here, I just adore you all @imre-gr, who deserves a special shoutout because she’s constantly making sure I don’t lose my mind. Love you Stefy

3. Reading. A good book can always lift my spirits up. and so does a good fic. @escapingreality51 just posted hers and made my day :) Amelia’s fics always do that

4. Coffee. A day without my morning coffee, is a day cancelled.

5. Travelling. I love visiting new places and meeting new people and learning new things! It’s the most exciting thing ever!

[sheambdreams-blog]

Alden’s Birth Story

For the second time being led through the labyrinth by the essence love itself was no less an experience. Each birth is a renewal, a rebirth by fire to the self, the right of passage into a deeper level of womanhood. 

I have felt an immense rush of gratitude for our experience. I am amazed by the power of women, the strength of the small baby within, the presence and patience of the birthing partner (in this case my husband), the trust and knowing of midwives, and the whole spectrum of birth stories that we can inhabit with one another.  All birth stories are empowering. I am certain that unmedicated vaginal childbirth, while incredibly revealing and beautiful, is no more a triumph than any other form of bringing a baby into the world. I am inspired by the strength of the parents in my life, their life stories of resilience, their birth stories, and I drew upon that force during labor. Much love, especially, to all the women in my life; we brim with the strength to endure. 

                                            ///

I was inside the acupuncturist’s office for the third time that week when I noticed the beautiful full moon calendar hanging on the wall in the office, right next to a painting of a baby wrapped up an enclosure of flowers. The calendar showed that the following day, Saturday, would bring May’s full moon, a “blue flower moon”. I hoped our baby would decide to come on such an auspicious day, but earlier in the afternoon my midwife had felt the baby’s head still riding high in my pelvis, fairly certain that it would be a bit longer until he made his descent. The gestation period with Elliot was comparable to a midwest chili cook-off (low and slow, a friend once called me a crockpot), so we decided to touch base in a week.

Yet, I woke up at 4:30 am to a familiar dull, throbbing pain in my pelvis. It was too uncomfortable to sleep, so I took a hot shower and continued to rest. “Reid, this might really be it!”. We both buzzed with anticipation, and Reid excitedly put the plastic sheet on the bed, which kind of gave me the willies. As the  morning went on, the contractions continued to form a steady rhythm. We decided to call our stalwart friends, Zach and Allie, to come fetch Elliot since we were decidedly in labor. Saying goodbye to Elliot was emotional, as I hugged his little body one last time as my only child, my first, the one who gave Reid and I confidence that we were fit enough to bring another life into the world.

Reid and I decided to go for a saunter, a sunshine walk. We held hands and walked at a snail’s pace...which can be a challenge for a guy with forever- long legs.  I felt proud and excited to be in labor. I wanted to shout from the rooftops “I’m in labor bitches!” Instead, I held a large jar of water and imagined myself doubling over in pain as the jar shattered on the concrete, but thankfully that never manifested.  We waddled on for about a mile, up the hill, down the hill, and to my surprise neither of us peed our pants (less surprising for Reid). We came home and Reid took pictures of my baby belly near the ivy on our back fence, we walked to the store and gathered the ingredients for a lemon cake, which I baked (see pictures for proof, if you need it).

“Reid, call the Incredible Midwife Regina!”

The  Incredible Midwife Regina arrived and scoped out my vagina

“You’re certainly in labor, and you’re at 2cm. Try to rest and I’ll be back later” Oh nelly. I had been laboring for 7 hours already and only the size of a penny...I envisioned the long dark, damp tunnel that I would traverse in order to see my baby. I decidedly prepared myself for another ridiculous marathon of labor. Reid and I hunkered down, he rubbed geranium sage oil on my feet. I drank beautiful flower essence to stay in the present moment and not think about the steep hill I was climbing. My dear friend Sarah came over with muffins, a hug and a shoulder rub, she encouraged us to watch Amy Schumer’s standup “Growing”. (That DID make me pee my pants...go see for yourself, it’s hliarious) We stopped watching when the contractions grew closer together. Laboring at home had so many beautiful benefits.

The IMR (Incredible Midwife Regina) came back 4 hours later with her crew of womanly wonders. Upon arrival, I practically collapsed into the arms of one of the midwives during an intense contraction. “I’m so glad you’re here, you smell like my Auntie”.

They peeked into my vagina again and I was at  6cm! Progress! They all shouted good job, as if I had been the one (I can’t take credit, the body did it all by itself!)

From then on, I did all of the active labor things. I sobbed to Bon Iver, I asked for cold washcloths, I said things that only I thought was funny, I sipped diluted gatorade.  Meanwhile an unusually powerful Oregon thunderstorm raged on outside. The lights flickered, wind whirred, and Raleigh came inside feeling anxious. She became the dog- guardian of my inflatable bathtub throne. And Reid, he was my anchor, tethering me to the present, reminding me with each wave of pain that our love would serve as a beacon to this new life. He held space so reverently, he stroked my thighs so commitedly and rigorously that he probably now has precursors to arthritis. He reminded me again and again that together we would bring our baby into this world.

I wonder if people who have already climbed Mt. Everest find the subsequent climbs to be more difficult. “What if I just can’t do it again?”

“What if I get too tired?” “What if something goes wrong this time?” This labor tested my mental fitness. My mind rattled on with doubts and worries, that I had to actively subdue and worked to regain stillness and surrender between each contraction.  Each rush of excruciation led me closer to the inevitable, which I wasn’t sure I was ready for. Birth by fire. Rebirthing my motherhood. Becoming a mother to two. Holy shit.

    In between contractions, I began staring at a picture of Elliot. I am a good mom, I can be a good mom again. “I can’t do this”. Another pulsing contraction, multiple waves getting stronger and stronger. “I want it to end!” I moaned. I was in a dark cave and the only way out was through the excruciating war that raged on in my pelvis.  I was pushing hard up against an unbroken bag of waters that was impeding my urge to push, though I was fully dilated. I knew I needed help, I begged the IMR to break my water. She did and I felt the gush and the baby’s head move deeper into my pelvis.

As Reid hilariously tells it, a flip seemed to switch and my inner warrior rose from the near-dead.  Apparently my inner warrior has a voice 8 octaves lower than my normal one.

“OH YEAH!” I grunted like a husky bear, “NOW I REMEMBER!”. I squatted, wrangled up the handles on the tub, felt a burst of  intense energy rush through and my will surfaced, I would be able to walk through the fire to the other side. I began to push through contractions until the baby made his descent. Pushing went on for another half hour until I felt that familiar FBROF (*fucking* burning ring of fire) and heard voices of my husband and the womanly wonders chanting “YES! YES! GOOD JOB!”. This was it, the most conflicting best/worst feeling of all, somehow the intensity always feels...SO right. Suddenly the baby’s head was halfway out of my vagina. It was other worldly to feel the baby’s head and see his long hair waving in the water, to touch it and feel my body so insanely open. 

On the next push the IMR got her hand around the baby somehow and helped him wriggle his way out safely, as his chord was partially wrapped and blocking his full descent. Push and ultimate relief, raw, open, exhausted. Suddenly there was a baby on my chest. A small, waxy, purple little grub rested on my chest and I panted “He’s here! He’s really here! He’s so much smaller than Elliot!” (But he wasn’t, he was the exact same size as Elliot). He was quiet and peaceful at first, his essence still in the water, safe within the womb. I hoped the water had muffled my battle cries, as I had once again screamed my baby out. Reid was behind me and I could feel his relief, his joy, his wonder as our boy stretched his lungs and became a breather of air.

As my good friend Jordan said, the power of the moon and the water ushered our baby Alden out,  born after 14 hours of labor under a full moon, during a thunderstorm in our home. Our boy had finally arrived, and we crawled into our own bed together.

The subsequent  events were less exciting, I ended up losing a lot of blood again, got to have some rectal medication administered (whoopee), two bags of IV fluid and many diaper changes (me, not the baby). My legs shook for a couple of hours and I struggled to stay warm. The night was long and the medications for the bleeding left me feeling like I wanted to crawl out of my skin. At one point Alden woke up and my brain continued to misfire, I didn’t know how to swaddle my baby. I hardly even registered having a baby. I’d forgotten how to do everything. I was already failing at mothering him. 

 The arrival of dawn brought immense clarity as it often does, in her gentle way of unveiling the day to tired eyes. I was relieved and so grateful to see our sweet, dark, squishy, hairy as a greek papu little baby safely resting in between our exhausted bodies. 

[marlaluster]

emptying clipboard w items numbered

1. This is a strange comment NicoAngelo Jepp Juarez Jamisola​​. Jepp Juarez But much preferred the devils days are over. Jamisola​​ 2. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=SoaKLb3H&id=28AD5EA70F5ED3352D0FBB5D454330E2AB49D60C&thid=OIP.SoaKLb3HpanjRIRRjmJL3QHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608006936879301535&selectedindex=147&mode=overlay&first=1 3. https://activerain-store.s3.amazonaws.com/image_store/uploads/5/6/0/5/9/ar118183857495065.JPG 4. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=A7Xbt8Hx&id=393943EBDF74EB20CDD63F2A520B2A5838CAF328&thid=OIP.A7Xbt8HxEtK0Rj-brcbwWQEsDF&q=porcupine&simid=607994541588875097&selectedindex=105&mode=overlay&first=1 5. http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/D1/D1765491-3B6E-4999-924E-3A6CCCF84855/Presentation.Large/North-American-porcupine-in-snow.jpg 6. Way to challenge the order of things. Pretty bad way but idk. The boundaries aren't really a friend but a thing that should goe far n never be anything at all. 7. Losing isn't a thing useful. There are ways to know that are what should be. 8. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=90zNTZzu&id=FBAB5C884F2E87A2DA8780775690B4E533677109&thid=OIP.90zNTZzuxp_tPdamxojXCwEsDK&q=porcupine&simid=608023786010642365&selectedindex=287&mode=overlay&first=1 9. http://www.worldanimalfoundation.org/i/Porcupine.jpg 10. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=XBSJcDjU&id=CEEF6AB2FD702B05ED167A04D74B2C8D4D7A9FCA&thid=OIP.XBSJcDjUEuAc7cM_8P6hoQHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608035077487919724&selectedindex=313&mode=overlay&first=1 11. http://cdn1.arkive.org/media/5B/5BC2B6A5-C7D1-4CDF-838A-0FF4183E8853/Presentation.Large/Front-profile-of-North-American-porcupine-walking.jpg 12. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=mzqlskRs&id=D52255E94E7E70FAA5B913EE40732F5D77DED94C&thid=OIP.mzqlskRsYLVpg8LcVF2JVQHaJ5&q=porcupine&simid=608040785520297027&selectedindex=314&mode=overlay&first=1 13. https://tse4.mm.bing.net/th?u=http%3a%2f%2fframetoframe.ca%2fwp-content%2fuploads%2f2014%2f08%2fporcupine-in-forest-dwight-ontario-9.jpg&ehk=t7RYEVNmprjdtiRt13%2bRww&w=320&h=428&c=7&p=0&r=0&o=5&dpr=1.5&pid=1.7 14. A porcupine unawaringly topples to some unknown intention. Porcupines are one of the forms of wildlife to be found reportedly at the US national monument devils tower, which is in Wyoming which is in like the Midwest. http://cdn1.arkive.org/media/5B/5BC2B6A5-C7D1-4CDF-838A-0FF4183E8853/Presentation.Large/Front-profile-of-North-American-porcupine-walking.jpg https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=XBSJcDjU&id=CEEF6AB2FD702B05ED167A04D74B2C8D4D7A9FCA&thid=OIP.XBSJcDjUEuAc7cM_8P6hoQHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608035077487919724&selectedindex=313&mode=overlay&first=1 15. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=2cJSUAPE&id=E6C5F1CF410C801162E6BEA4F77A57BC7DA61FB0&thid=OIP.2cJSUAPEB9hXFzRi9YVL9QHaE9&q=porcupine&simid=608051411258770835&selectedindex=334&mode=overlay&first=1 16. http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/C6/C666F71E-D95B-469E-8A6B-3BD76A90D5E1/Presentation.Large/Side-profile-of-adult-North-American-porcupine-.jpg 17. NOUN a large rodent with defensive spines or quills on the body and tail. 18. https://www.nps.gov/common/uploads/grid_builder/imr/crop16_9/795E4C06-1DD8-B71B-0B92EA6FDCD3C786.jpg?width=307&quality=90&mode=crop 19. The devil is making music because going from the neighbor. It just woke me n it was playing just now. 20. Music still going from the neighbor. "I'm not allowed to keep doing it but it's supposed to be [not as] noisy," the devil said. "I cannot be this alive as something that's not so okay," the devil said this pretty much, it was messing w the words in my mind. "Did I say that," the devil said something like that, it was messing w the words again in my mind. The noise had seemed quieter but was still heard n still bothersome. I disagree w things here. I disagree w the dollar as Lord n other things, poverty, other things that are pretended to be normal here where it secretly worships the devil.

[minthepin]

7 days or 150,000 steps. Your choice…

Highlights

By far my favorite thing here was eating at Zellers Bistro. I may or may not have cried at the dinner table. I now realize that I will never amount to that level of happiness again so I can die. Dad said they are ranked in the top 10 restaurants in Budapest. They greeted you with some elderflower champagne (made in house) and said goodbye with some miniature cupcakes. The whole atmosphere was so sweet, like some basement/wine storage place that was last minute turned into a wonderful little restaurant. I had the Hungarian gray beef steak with jacket potato and green peas, and dad had the Cod with black risotto. Needless to say, the steak was better. It just melted in your mouth as tears of joy came running down my face.

The restaurant

Cod and black risotto

This dude keeps following me

Beef and peas, and some of my tears

Carrot cake

Margaret Island comes in close second. I don’t know whether it was just because I was tired of being around people, or whether it was the natural (although hella manicured) quality of the island. But it was just a relaxing day. I followed some self-guided walking tour of the island – there were some Roman ruins, an old convent (for Princess Margaret – her father said if he won the war he would give her to God, so she became a nun at the ripe old age of 9), the Grand Hotel Margitsziget (it used to be the most fashionable hotel in all of Budapest, simply known as “the Grand,” but after WW2 the hotel was modernized), a cute little rose garden and finally, a Japanese garden (waterfalls, streams, bridges and all). The only disappointment was that there was suppose to be a musical fountain, playing old Hungarian tunes, but for some reason, there was neither a fountain nor music. Maybe I liked it so much because it was away from all the traffic and tourists, or maybe it was because I didn’t have to have the stress of trying to keep up with a tour group that I would eventually lose.

Roman ruins

Rose Garden

Rose Garden

Water Tour

Princess Margret

The Convent

The Grand Hotel

The Grand Hotel

Japanese Garden

Japanese Garden

The neither Musical nor Fountain

Japanese Garden

And for my final highlight, it must have been the Opera. Surprising, I know. But actually, they are low key known for their amazing performances. We went to the Hungarian National Opera theater to see “Marios and the Magician” and “Bluebeards Castle,” both written by Hungarian composers. So, although they were in Hungarian and I understood nothing, they had surtitles translating in English. Unfortunately, the theater will be closed down for the next five years for renovation. The singers were so powerful, and the music was just amazing. I have never experienced something so dramatic in person.

The theater, we were on the third floor so a few people got nose bleeds.

It me

The outside of the theater

Daily Activities

Seeing as that was nearly a day worth of activities I figured I should give a slightly more detailed description of my time here (but not too much because this post is already long, so more so pictures than anything).

Day 1

I got in around noon and slept most of the day. Dad and I went out for a sunset walk to see the Parliament, Chain Bridge, and some other things in the nearby vicinity. He works at the Ministry of Agriculture, so he wanted to show me that as well. We then ate a cherry-poppyseed strudel (they are in love with poppyseed things, and strudels so I’m here for it).

The fat policeman statue – rubbing his belly brings you luck

Cherry and Poppyseed Strudel

Imre Nagy Statue, the bridge is made out of Soviet tank pieces (parliament in the back)

The Parliament

View from the Chain Bridge

Day 2

I wanted to get some hardcore tourist shit in still, but dad not so much. We compromised and went on a free alternative walking tour. It was quite interesting – there is a competition every year to design murals on blank walls, it is meant to make the city more beautiful. One of my favorites was the Rubix cube, up close it’s just a bunch of dots, but further away it becomes a cube! The guy who invented it is Hungarian (a lot of things are actually Hungarian – with Greek inspiration of course). There is a quote next to the cube that says, “There is more than one way to solve a problem.” Which is think is super applicable to everyone’s life and honestly, that is a really good thing to keep in mind when doing anything. I was talking to Joe a few weeks ago and something he emphasized in his personal belief is just perspective. Everything needs to get put into perspective in order to try to understand it – maybe it is a person, or a problem, anything really. I just felt like those two went hand in hand and I truly appreciate the beauty of both statements. We saw a lot more street art (attached below I’ll explain it for you, although mom you can just call and I’ll tell you. I know it’s just you reading it…).

Rubix Cube, the quote is “Mindig van megoldás és nem is csak egy!”

This was a Spanish painter, and the man depicted help save a lot of Jewish people during the War. Unfortunately, I cant remember his name.

This was a cute little sticker that is all over Budapest

This is a depiction of Buda and Pest (two separate cities, but they come together because of love). It tries to switch up the stereotypes of both sides of the city.

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The theme for this was “all things Hungarian,” Poseidon one has a bunch of little features (like the train), and the girl is suppose to be a classical Hungarian girl.

It’s me and dad trying to take a selfie in front of a fish!

Day 3

Today was Pentecostal, so more or less everything was closed. Since it is a Christian holiday, I decided to do the Jewish legacy walking tour. We walked all over the Jewish Ghetto and there were three Synagogues we saw – the Great, the Modern, and the Orthodox. All of which were beautiful, but none really resembled a traditional Synagogue. The Great Synagogue – biggest on continental Europe (I think) – had a weeping willow tree made out of silver. Each leaf had a name on it. Around it were rocks everywhere, this is how Jewish people signify their love at burials – the rocks last forever to signify that they will not be forgotten. It was so touching and sad, Hungarians have such a rich history with the Jewish folk during WW2. Of about 700,000 before the war there were only 60,000 left when it ended. We saw the mass burial ground and heard about the Shoe Memorial by the Danube (see Day 4). There were some positives though, there was a statue of Raul Wallenberg and Carl Lutz. Both of them played a major role in saving thousands and thousands of Jewish people during the war in Hungary. If you’re reading this, you honestly should take 10 minutes out of your day and read about Hungarian history and World War 2. Currently, the government is trying to deny all responsibilities. They are blaming the Germans for actions the Hungarians took. Of course, there was an influence, but the Hungarians went above and beyond to destroy a culture and a people. The government even built a fountain (Day 4) trying to avoid all blame. Total and complete bullshit.

Raul Wallenberg Memorial

Synagogue – Modern

Synagogue door – it is under reconstruction

Carl Lutz Memorial

I think this is super applicable to a bunch of incredible people I know

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Weeping Willow Tree

Memorable Jewish people

The Great Synagogue

The Great Synagogue

Day 4

Seeing as losing my tour group yesterday was traumatic, I decided to try again. I went on a “Red” tour – i.e. communism. And although it was super interesting and good, I think jet lag was catching up with me making me super out of it (also see Day 5….). First off, I woke up to an e-mail saying I was Unconditionally Accepted to my Master’s program (WOO!). But then I went to lunch at dads work and got an amazing view of the Parliament. The tour was good, I saw the interactive fountain/blame it on the Germans fountain,  but I just wasn’t all that into it. So I kinda “lost” them and went to do my own thing. I saw the Shoe Memorial on the Danube and just wandered around Budapest.

The Parliament from the Ministry of Agriculture

The “its the German’s fault” fountain

The Parliament from the back.

Shoe Memorial

Shoe Memorial

The Chain Bridge

View from the Chain Bridge

Chain Bridge

Sticker on the bridge

Day 5

The food was too good the night before, so I’m pretty sure my body needed to calm down a little. Went for a short walk but nothing too extraordinary.

Day 6

Ya girl finally did the whole city tour – I got over to the Buda side! We saw St. Stephens Basilica, the first metro station in continental Europe, the little princess (I took the same pic 4 years later, see my insta min.mosa), the Palace, St. Matthias Church, fisherman’s bastion, and then got lost trying to get back. Those places are really beautiful, but I think you can just see it and be done. I’m not sure I have much to say about these places, overall beautiful but I think it is super touristy. AND in Budapest it is very traditional to go to Baths – water helps cure everything right? So, we went to St. Lucas Baths, which were really kinda small. It isn’t the touristy place (Szechenyi Baths, which I was at 4 years ago), but instead one where locals go. I was a little iffy on this idea because bath with your father doesn’t sound too good…. But It was just a warm swimming pool with a jacuzzi and a swirling current. It was fun to go to, but I wasn’t the biggest fan. My life would have been the same without it. If you ever make it over here, it is definitely something you have to do, just to cross it off your bucket list (which by the way, I have been hungry in Hungary, so #winning).

First metro station

The little princess and I

Views from the Chain Bridge

St. Matthias Church

The Fisherman’s Bastion

Views from the Fisherman’s Bastion

Me getting lost

Still lost, but found a cool window

St. Lucas Baths

Selfie at the Baths, ft. my new camera (thanks dad!)

Parliament at sunset

Day 7

Margret Island, and just putzing around, later we did the Opera!

Onwards…

I really enjoyed my time here, and would recommend it! I think it has a lot of history, beautiful art, and some really neat people. Overall, I can see why people call it the “Paris of Eastern Europe.” I don’t think I would go that far since 98% of the time it smells like pee, but I would say it is really pretty.

On my last day before being in transit to Jordan, I think we are just gonna hang out and maybe take some pictures. If you get a chance, you should come here. Maybe don’t spend a whole week (or maybe do since beer is only a euro…), but if you do be sure to check out some of their wonderful history and culture.

This place really makes you understand your good fortune. At least mine. I really have had a lot of time to think (both because tour groups get lost, and because I sit a lot on my own). I can’t believe how lucky I have been these past four years. Yeah, a lot of shit happened, but honestly, overall, I don’t know if I would have become the person I am today without it. I grew up, I am able to reflect on things, and most importantly I like who I am. If that isn’t something to be celebrated, I am not sure what is.

The first time I was here, I was on my way to becoming a freshman, getting my BS in something, and now I am on my way towards getting my MS in international development. I never thought my college experience would have turned out this way, nor that I would have ended up in a field like this, but holy shit am I lucky. I am so lucky to be pursuing a career that I think I’ll love, I am lucky to have known some amazing people, and I am so lucky to have love, support and good fill every corner of my life. Even if I can’t do that for myself, I know I’ll have someone else who can get a flashlight and blind me with light. So thank you to everyone who has contributed to my last four years, good or bad. You have made me better, stronger and wiser.

7 Days in Budapest 7 days or 150,000 steps. Your choice... Highlights By far my favorite thing here was eating at…

[thearrangment-phff]

LX. Charlie and Bertie

May 2018

“Something’s wrong isn’t it?” asked Isabella.

“Your Imperial Highness, your sons, are too large and we fear that giving birth vaginally could harm you.”

“I don’t care about me. I mean it. Just let me push.”

“Ma’am you are a small woman, and your sons are large babies. We cannot risk doing the wrong thing.”

“Listen to my wife please,” begged Harry.

“I want my mother. Bring my mother in please Harry.”

Harry rushed out of the room and within seconds entered with Marie Astrid who in turn rushed to her daughter’s side.

“Belle, what’s wrong?”

“I just want to give birth naturally. Charlie and Bertie, they’re too big, and I don’t know what’s going to happen,” cried Isabella.

“Doctors I am a pediatric nurse. Could you explain the situation, please?”

Marie Astrid was taken to a corner in the room while some other women attended to Isabella. The contraction were getting stronger and closer, and Isabella knew she would have to push soon.  

“Belle, darling you are going to have a natural birth, but if something goes wrong, then the doctors will have to perform a c-section. If that happens, you will have to go to the hospital. They will not perform a surgery in a bedroom where you are likely to die,” explained Marie Astrid.

“Mama! That’s a little harsh, don’t you think?” asked Alexander.

“Well, she needs to hear it. This isn’t something we tiptoe around. This is not only her life but the life of her sons,” replied Marie Astrid.

“They’re getting stronger,” complained Isabella.

“Her water hasn’t broken yet,” whispered Gabriella.

“I can hear you, and I understand that. How long will it be?”

“It’s different for every woman,” answered one doctor.

“I am very tired of hearing that today. Can anyone give me an answer to anything?” asked Isabella.

“Ma’am stuff like this, just happens, in simpler terms.”

9 more hours. That is how long Isabella was in labor until her first son was born. What started off with as Harry, Alexander, Imre, Christoph, Carl Christian, Marie Astrid, Marie Christine, and Gabriella turned into just Marie Astrid in the room. There were no screams just crying from Isabella that put Harry on edge. The first baby had moved in a different direction than previously known which forced the doctors to push the baby in the correct position by hand.  

That was the only time Isabella had screamed out in pain. Alexander and Imre had to hold back Harry, who wanted to storm into the room to see what was happening. Isabella wanted her family in the, room but once things started getting messy, she ordered everyone but her mother out.  

Once the first cries of a baby Harry rushed into the room. Isabella was crying and sweating, holding onto her mother for dear life. Harry rushed to her before going to his son who had started crying as well. The doctors quickly cleaned up the baby and handed him to his father. Harry and Isabella were both in tears.  

“Harry, bring him over here please,” asked Isabella.

“Ma’am you are going to need to push again soon,” interrupted one doctor.

“Oh he looks so beautiful,” cried Isabella.

“This was all you. You did this Isabella,” smiled Harry.

“Sir if you could please step away now.”

Harry took his son away from his mother and looked into his eyes. This little pink baby would one day grow up to be a man and Harry would raise him into the best person he could be. For years he imagined being a father and now holding his eldest born son, it was now possible.

“We need you to start pushing again.” Harry watched Isabella grab onto her mother, “Ma’am stop pushing.”

“What why?” asked Isabella in a panic.

Marie Astrid attempted to calm her daughter but the whispers between doctors were making Isabella go mad.

“Ma’am you are going to feel pain, let it out if you want.”

“What? Why?” panicked Isabella.

The baby's shoulder were too broad for Isabella, and it was clear when she screamed out in pain. Having doctors touch her in her most private areas was unsettling. She had only been with two other men in her life, but here she was with five different men and women staring at her most private areas. 

The doctors were rubbing Isabella’s private parts to loosen the area and let the baby pass. Nothing was working, and Isabella could not stop screaming out in pain.  

“Please do something!” yelled Harry.

“Harry please step outside. Give Charles to one of the doctors,” ordered Marie Astrid.

Harry was reluctant to have his son being ripped away from him, but hearing Isabella’s screams were enough. He couldn’t do much for her, but if leaving the room helped her, then he would do it.

“Harry! What’s happening?” asked Alexander.

“The first baby is healthy. He’s perfect,” answered Harry.

“Why is Belle screaming?” asked Gabriella.

“The second baby is larger and is struggling to come,” explained Harry the best way he could.

“Hearing her screams makes me sick. I would never wish what Belle is going through on anyone,” said Kathleen.

“Why don’t you go sit down somewhere else? Adelaide do you mind taking her?” asked Imre.

“Of course,” smiled Adelaide leading Kathleen away from the small crowd.

“How long do you think it will be until the second baby is born?” asked Christoph.

“I don’t know. Charles took hours and-”

Isabella’s screaming had stopped which alerted Harry, and he went back into the room. Isabella was still crying but this time holding their newly born son in her arms. The doctor had a smile on her face as she handed Charles to Harry. He went to Isabella’s side with this giant smile.

“They are perfect, aren’t they Harry?” asked Isabella in tears.

“You did amazing.”

“Everything hurts. It’s all hurts so badly,” whined Isabella.

“Isabella?”

The doctors immediately saw something was wrong. One doctor took Albert away from Isabella’s arms while another lifted her the blanket that covered his knees down to her feet.

“The bleeding isn’t normal. We have a problem.”

The doctors moved around the room and once again Charles was taken away from Harry’s arms. Harry had to leave, and the last thing he saw before the door was closed on his face was Marie Astrid’s face in a panic.

“Harry what happened?!” asked Alexander.

“She was bleeding. I don’t know, I don’t know.”

“Harry what are you talking about?” asked Marie Christine.

“She was bleeding out and I don’t know why,” replied Harry.

“Where was she bleeding from Harry?”

“Um... her... down there! I don’t know.”

“Are you sure it was blood and not fluids or the placenta?” asked Gabriella.

“I don’t know! She was fine, and we were holding the boys then she started looking pail. She looked sick. Next thing I know they are taking Charles away from me and shoving me out of the room.”

“She’s probably hemorrhaging. Blood is normal after giving birth so how much was it exactly?” asked Marie Christine.

“I don’t know! They just said there was a lot of blood.”

“Harry everything will be fine. There is no need to panic. The doctors know what they are doing,” assured Imre.

“I’ve only been married a year. This whole year has been the nothing but pain for her,” complained Harry.

“Harry I’m sure that’s not true,” replied Alexander.

“The babies haven’t stopped crying. Why haven’t they stopped crying?” asked Harry in a panic.

“Something is wrong,” said Gabriella.

Alexander started to tear up which ended up being a chain effect, “Somebody has to go in there and see how she’s doing!” yelled Marie Christine.

“Where is papa?” asked Gabriella.

“He’s out back. He couldn’t handle Belle’s screaming. It was too much for him,” answered Imre.

“I’ll go in there,” replied Harry.

The moment Harry went to the door Marie Astrid had come out and closed the door behind her.

“Mama what’s happening with Belle?” asked Marie Christine.

“She is fine now. Usually, after birth, the body releases blood. First, the placentas weren’t coming out after the births. The doctors had to do it by hand which caused Belle to scream out in pain. The blood was flowing too much for the doctors liking and moved to control it as soon as possible.”

“What about the babies?!” asked Alexander.

“Both are fine, perfectly healthy. Charles is 4.8 kilograms and Albert is 5.1 kilograms,” answered Marie Astrid.

“God they’re huge!” yelled Imre.

“Belle is exhausted and has asked to be left alone. For the time being, they are moving the boys into another room. Someone, get your father and everyone else! Then you can see the boys,” smiled Marie Astrid.

Marie Christine and Gabriella went to find their father and Alexander, Christoph, and Imre went to tell their wives and everyone else in the Chateau the news of another royal birth. Harry had stayed behind to talk with his mother-in-law.

“What really happened?”

“Belle lost a lot of blood and fainted after the got the second placenta out. The pain and the blood loss made her pulse weak, and the doctors thought they were losing her. That was quickly resolved, but she’s too weak to speak, let alone feed the boys. Amelia, my cousin's daughter, and Princess Christine’s daughter had a baby a couple of months ago. We are thinking of asking her to feed the boys until Belle is strong enough,” explained Marie Astrid.

“Is that wise?”

“Wet nurses are common, and they were the normal thing to do 200 years ago. Amelia loves Belle, but if she won’t Gabriella is still breastfeeding Victoria so she would gladly do it.”

“I’m scared,” admitted Harry.

“I understand, but Belle is more scared. You need to be here for her. You have two sons who will need your attention. She will need you these next couple of months more than anything.”

“I doubt that. Isabella has a whole army of people who can help. Who knows if I’ll ever get to hold my sons after today.”

“Take charge. Do it now or regret it forever.”

“Why are you helping me?”

“Because you are my son-in-law and I care for you like a son. Other than that, I’ve known many people who enter marriages like you did. They all loved each other until their last breath, so I believe that will happen to you and Belle,” replied Marie Astrid.

“Why not let her marry for love? Why let her marry me?”

“Because I know you. You have a heart, and you can’t say that for a lot of boys. Belle had ambition, and she’d be better on an international scale to achieve what she had been dreaming about.”

“I don’t even know what she’s been dreaming about,” scolded Harry.

“Behind the hard shell she uses as protection, I guarantee you that you will not find another mind quite like hers. Poor girl always wants to help everybody even if it means sacrificing everything,” told Marie Astrid.

Isabella’s family slowly came into the room holding the babies. Harry held Albert while Carl Christian held Charles. The two men could not stop beaming. The names Isabella chose just fit so perfectly with the boys. Everyone was doting upon the newest little grandchildren, and Harry couldn’t help but stare of Kathleen’s growing stomach. Less than a year ago, Adelaide and Gabriella had given birth to their own daughters just two months apart.

Kate had given birth just last month, Isabella gave birth in May and Kathleen was due in October. So many babies would be running around together soon enough and Harry could not be more excited for that. For years he always imagined having his own family, and now it was a reality.

“They are absolutely perfect,” smiled Adelaide.

“It was all Isabella. I promise you that,” laughed Harry.

“I think they’ll have your coloring Harry,” laughed Imre.

“You think? I can’t see it.”

“They just have your hair. They are all Bourbon though,” added Alexander.

“Christoph and Imre looked the same when they were little. Everyone else looked the same, grandmama said it was the Bourbon blood that ran in us,” smiled Marie Christine.

“How is Belle, mama?”

“She is resting. Ella would you be so kind as to feed the boys until Belle is feeling healthy enough?” asked Marie Astrid.

“Of course. Harry are you okay with this?” asked Gabriella.

“Uh... yes. Thank you.”

“Alexander would you be so kind as to help Belle and Harry with anything they need?” asked Marie Astrid.

“Of course,” smiled Alexander.

“Do you need us to do anything mama?” asked Imre.

“Just be there for Belle and Harry,” replied Marie Astrid.

[marlaluster]

emptying clipboard

This is a strange comment NicoAngelo Jepp Juarez Jamisola​​. Jepp Juarez But much preferred the devils days are over. Jamisola​​ https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=SoaKLb3H&id=28AD5EA70F5ED3352D0FBB5D454330E2AB49D60C&thid=OIP.SoaKLb3HpanjRIRRjmJL3QHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608006936879301535&selectedindex=147&mode=overlay&first=1 https://activerain-store.s3.amazonaws.com/image_store/uploads/5/6/0/5/9/ar118183857495065.JPG https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=A7Xbt8Hx&id=393943EBDF74EB20CDD63F2A520B2A5838CAF328&thid=OIP.A7Xbt8HxEtK0Rj-brcbwWQEsDF&q=porcupine&simid=607994541588875097&selectedindex=105&mode=overlay&first=1 http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/D1/D1765491-3B6E-4999-924E-3A6CCCF84855/Presentation.Large/North-American-porcupine-in-snow.jpg Way to challenge the order of things. Pretty bad way but idk. The boundaries aren't really a friend but a thing that should goe far n never be anything at all. Losing isn't a thing useful. There are ways to know that are what should be. https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=90zNTZzu&id=FBAB5C884F2E87A2DA8780775690B4E533677109&thid=OIP.90zNTZzuxp_tPdamxojXCwEsDK&q=porcupine&simid=608023786010642365&selectedindex=287&mode=overlay&first=1 http://www.worldanimalfoundation.org/i/Porcupine.jpg https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=XBSJcDjU&id=CEEF6AB2FD702B05ED167A04D74B2C8D4D7A9FCA&thid=OIP.XBSJcDjUEuAc7cM_8P6hoQHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608035077487919724&selectedindex=313&mode=overlay&first=1 http://cdn1.arkive.org/media/5B/5BC2B6A5-C7D1-4CDF-838A-0FF4183E8853/Presentation.Large/Front-profile-of-North-American-porcupine-walking.jpg https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=mzqlskRs&id=D52255E94E7E70FAA5B913EE40732F5D77DED94C&thid=OIP.mzqlskRsYLVpg8LcVF2JVQHaJ5&q=porcupine&simid=608040785520297027&selectedindex=314&mode=overlay&first=1 https://tse4.mm.bing.net/th?u=http%3a%2f%2fframetoframe.ca%2fwp-content%2fuploads%2f2014%2f08%2fporcupine-in-forest-dwight-ontario-9.jpg&ehk=t7RYEVNmprjdtiRt13%2bRww&w=320&h=428&c=7&p=0&r=0&o=5&dpr=1.5&pid=1.7 A porcupine unawaringly topples to some unknown intention. Porcupines are one of the forms of wildlife to be found reportedly at the US national monument devils tower, which is in Wyoming which is in like the Midwest. http://cdn1.arkive.org/media/5B/5BC2B6A5-C7D1-4CDF-838A-0FF4183E8853/Presentation.Large/Front-profile-of-North-American-porcupine-walking.jpg https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=XBSJcDjU&id=CEEF6AB2FD702B05ED167A04D74B2C8D4D7A9FCA&thid=OIP.XBSJcDjUEuAc7cM_8P6hoQHaE7&q=porcupine&simid=608035077487919724&selectedindex=313&mode=overlay&first=1 https://www.bing.com/images/search?view=detailV2&ccid=2cJSUAPE&id=E6C5F1CF410C801162E6BEA4F77A57BC7DA61FB0&thid=OIP.2cJSUAPEB9hXFzRi9YVL9QHaE9&q=porcupine&simid=608051411258770835&selectedindex=334&mode=overlay&first=1 http://cdn2.arkive.org/media/C6/C666F71E-D95B-469E-8A6B-3BD76A90D5E1/Presentation.Large/Side-profile-of-adult-North-American-porcupine-.jpg NOUN a large rodent with defensive spines or quills on the body and tail. https://www.nps.gov/common/uploads/grid_builder/imr/crop16_9/795E4C06-1DD8-B71B-0B92EA6FDCD3C786.jpg?width=307&quality=90&mode=crop The devil is making music because going from the neighbor. It just woke me n it was playing just now. Music still going from the neighbor. "I'm not allowed to keep doing it but it's supposed to be [not as] noisy," the devil said. "I cannot be this alive as something that's not so okay," the devil said this pretty much, it was messing w the words in my mind. "Did I say that," the devil said something like that, it was messing w the words again in my mind. The noise had seemed quieter but was still heard n still bothersome. I disagree w things here. I disagree w the dollar as Lord n other things, poverty, other things that are pretended to be normal here where it secretly worships the devil.