#imagine if i invested the time lost typing this shit on my phone actually writing????

[tenrose]

I may or may not have bought a ps5 for black Friday...

You might think this is a useless buy, and it is. But get this, I have a gaming pc but it's not very strong. Also I don't like playing on it. Mainly because I work on computer screen all day and it hurt my eyes (not sure a TV screen is better but I can see from a bit more afar) Also I absolutely do not know how to play on keyboard so I already play with a gamepad but it's an Action gamepad and it keeps disconnecting it's annoying. Also I don't play a lot but the games I'm more interested into playing are way too big for my pc anyway (Baldur's gate here I come, also wanna try Elden Ring but I feel like with my disaster level of gaming this might be suicide lmao). Also I want the physical copies of games, it feels wrong not having them physical, and I have brand new empty shelves waiting for other stuff than books. Speaking of physical I haven't owned a disc reader in ages, so I will finally be able to own the 4k version of LOTR (and if I'm being honest I'm more excited about spending my new year's eve watching LOTR than anything else), not sure the ps5 does read music CDs though... But if it does it might convince me to also buy new CDs we'll see. But yeah, I'm not a movie watcher mainly cause I don't have the means anymore (meaning I don't pay platforms) but there's some movies I want to buy, so who cares if I watch the same movies 150 times anyway (do I really need anything else but lotr to be happy? Obviously not). Speaking of tv, at first this whole project was kinda blurry cause I need a brand new TV first, because mine is old so no point in having 4k stuff with it. And at first this was what I was supposed to buy for black Friday and my aunt's husband told me he'd check what kind of TV would be good for me, but long story short story they bought me a TV as my Christmas/birthday gift (cause I never gave my bank account number for my birthday) so my aunt said it's for both. I was like 'you did what????' lmao. The only 'annoying' thing is that I bought Dragon Age on Steam but my pc is literally dying, basically I have like 10go left with the game installed so it's an absolute mess, I had to lower quality and shit and between work, migraines and sickness I've played six hours... So I'm gonna buy it again and I'm not very proud for that. To not feel like I've spent stupidly 60€ twice I'm gonna use the gift card from our Union which is conveniently 60€. But yeah stupid move if I had been patient.... But anyway.

So yeah it's kinda 500€ for something that is absolutely necessary. BUT I have solid arguments. Basically it is the gift for me finally being able to put on with my house chores. I mean it's not perfect yet, I still have the dreadful administrative paper to tidy but yes my apartment is now in an acceptable state and truth to be told this wasn't an easy task for me and maintaining it keeps being harder but the experts were right, setting up a routine help and it is easier to clean a little bit every day. Also I finally have my massive bookshelves I'm so in love with them. And basically the apartment being better makes me wanna do stuff and make it prettier. Btw I also feel the desire to buy a bigger plant, I think I'm ready to take this risk. And most importantly I now feel, safe enough to invite my parents properly to eat. And that is something I've never felt confident before to do. Because of the cleaning and also because of the cooking. And that's a huge thing for me, cause believe it or not in like 15 years I've been away I've never invited them to dinner, they like sometimes visited me when they were nearby but every time I had meetings with my mom I'd invite her to the restaurant instead of home to avoid stressful situations. Mind you this is my mom we're talking about so it's gonna be stressful anyway and not right enough for her, but if I know it is right enough for me that's ok. Needless to say I've never talk to her about this house chores struggle, I've been dealing with it with my aunt without who all of this wouldn't be possible and honestly I don't even know how the fuck I am supposed to thank her for everything she did to me since I've been a teen. She's the first one I came out to, she visited me when I was hospitalised for my mental health, she and my grandma made sure I had money to eat when I was a student and she's the only person I can only discuss with my undiagnosed whatever is wrong with my dysfunctional brain, my mental health struggle without her being like 'well do it', like for example she did scold me for the cleaning but like not a useless scold where I feel even more worse than I already felt before, she explains to me tricks and stuff so yes it's what I'm the most thankful to her for.

And now that this thing is altogether under my capacities, I feel like I can focus on something new next year. I have plan but this involves confronting my biggest fear and some of you might guess what I'm talking about. Like it's not a thing I desperately crave to do but it would make my life easier and also it's like the only thing I don't have that stop from being 100% independent of anyone... But yeah I'm scared. And it might come handy for my next next project which is getting the hell out of the infernal place that is my job (but unfortunately that thing doesn't depend 100% on me unlike some would want us to think, like the job market is utter shit everywhere) but anyway

So yes all in all I think I am allowed to recklessly buy a ps5 as a gift to myself.

And I don't know why the hell I wrote a whole damn essay to convince everyone but really just myself that it is ok and that I shouldn't feel guilty about it.

And why the hell am I justifying myself for spending my own money earned with my depression driving job???

[mrpenguinpants]

Oh! Sorry for the late reply, but it’s not canon lore, haha. Part of me hopes it kinda was just to give Keqing a bit more introspection but alas, Mihoyo has tens of different characters to make so it’s understandable. I thought of it as a modern au type of thing where Keqing ends up moving in a apartment complex only to be greeted with men she has to babysit as the price JHDJSHDJSJ– It’s a fun little idea, and at first, she hates them all but eventually, walking outside of her place for a free meal becomes an escape of sorts. Ningguang, her dreaded co-worker, makes sure she doesn’t hear the end of it and is like “Please, you’re almost 27 nowz. Get yourself a man already, you have quite the options.”

Also, congrats on getting Xiao! I haven’t gotten him yet but at the end of his banner, I think I can make around 20 rolls so here’s hoping he’ll come with those!

No worries at all, I take FOREVER to reply to anyone. Plus this week was midterms so I’m still recovering from that if you’re wondering why I’ve been so silent. Ahh I see, I still need to read Keqing’s lore but until then 👀 I am fully invested in this. We’ll make a 180k word slow burn fic together. Honestly, I really want to write some Chongyun, Xingqiu, Xinyan, and Xiao interactions. My brainworm mind wants Xingqiu to be the biggest little shit and tells Chongyun that there’s a demon that needs to be exorcised at Wangshu inn. Turns out it’s Xiao but Chongyun being the trusting friend that he is, doesn’t believe Xingqiu would lie to me and fully believes Xiao is a demon. Xiao doesn’t know how to socialize and he doesn’t know how to handle interactions so it’s this entire goose chase. Xinyan comes along because she’s always wanted to see a demon. I can imagine her yelling “DEMON! COME OUT YOU COWARD!” while Xiao is gripping onto the roof beam above them for dear life so he doesn’t get found out. 

Ahh, I get that mihoyo wants to bust out new content but it also makes me sad that it will probably be awhile before we get Part 2 to anything. But oh well, I guess we can always make stuff up for part 2′s before Mihoyo proceeds to shred them apart haha. I love modern au, where everything is fine and happy and no one dies. Especially now since we’re all in self-isolation. It’s not much but being able to write is actually kinda therapeutic. Speaking of which, it’s valentines day today. I almost forgot because well, I’m asexual so no relationships for me, so I kinda forgot feb 14 had any importance haha. But hopefully you all that have partners stay safe if you plan on spending today together and for us single folk, hang out with friends^^ I’m having a movie/game night with everyone and I’m pretty excited. 

---

But getting back on track. I love roommate schneegans. When I first read this with my sleep deprived brain, I thought you meant that she had to live with the same people she had to babysit when they were children. That’d be so awkward but funny haha. I can imagine Childe being such a wholesome kid like Teucer that when Keqing meets him again when he’s an adult she’s so sad. You were such a cute kid, where did things go wrong? This also applies to Diluc (RIP DILUC MAN) and Kaeya. 

Diluc is so socially constipated that he acts rude af because he doesn’t know how to socialize. Reminds me of the type of guy that is thinking of cute puppies but as the scariest resting bitch face. The amount of emotional range he has makes Keqing wonder if he’s secretly planning on burning the apartment complex down to the ground or if he’s slept in the past week. He hasn’t. Man is crumbling so he’s gonna make the world crumble down with him in his woe is me bullshit (jk I love you Diluc). Keqing makes the customary “Hi, nice to meet you. I’m your new neighbor” but Diluc is actually running on fumes (he’s filter feeding at his point) that he looks so scary that Keqing almost runs away. Then the next day she sees him exit his home and he cleaned up so well that Keqing doesn’t recognize him. Assumed that Diluc lived with a brother that was in dire help. So she always offers him weird pick me up items and Diluc doesn’t know how to handle gifts so he just accepts them. He doesn’t know what the fuck she’s talking about since he lives alone but he assumes she’s some random cat lady. 

Kaeya is such an ass. Like actually awful. Was the kind of guy to pull the fire alarm just to get out of class for the day. Probably does it in the apartment just to mess with Diluc, which inheritably messes with Keqing very fragile beauty sleep, but he always manages to escape with a slap on the wrist. Keqing has lost so much faith in the justice system after that. He seemed like such a nice guy, well in comparison to her first meetings with Diluc, until he found out she had a fear of frogs and proceeded to mail her a package of them. She’s been haunted by nightmares of waking up to one on her face and she’s wondering if she can get away with setting his home on fire and getting away the same way he does from pulling the fire alarm. It seems like poetic irony but as soon as she thinks this Kaeya is messaging her “don’t do it”. She doesn’t know how he got her phone number and she’s not going to find out. 

Zhongli was the guy she went to highschool with where she had the fattest crush on. He still looks the exact same just taller and she can feel her inner agony seeping up when she spots him. Then proceeds to internally wail when they both enter the elevator and they live on the same floor. She’s internally begging and pleading that Zhongli doesn’t recognize her, but of fucking course he does and he remembers every little detail. The most deadpan face as he asks her if she still has the zhongli pin that some crazy club made for the student council they were both apart of. What pisses her off the most is that he’s actually genuinely curious and isn’t trying to make a stab at her. She hates him with every fiber of her being. 

Childe seemed like such a cute kid (I fully believe he’s younger than Keqing, you cannot take this away from my cold dead heads) and he mentioned how he was moving away from his family but he misses his cute little sisters and brothers. Keqing felt so much wholesome love in her body until Childe mistaken her as being younger than him and messed up her hair. She almost screamed bloody murder but made the quick correction that she was in fact, much older than him. Which was the wrong fucking move because he became the biggest little shit. Kept calling her old with weak bones, “when are you going to fossilize?” that she’s sure if there wasn’t a law against second degree murder, she would do it right then and there. 

---

I totally went off on a tangent right there haha. But yeah, I can imagine them all going to each other places for free meals and it’s actually some wholesome stuff. Kaeya and Diluc relive their childhood brother antics, Childe comes from a big family so he doesn’t get sad when he eats alone, Keqing gets to take a break and turn her brain off from work, and Zhongli is just happy to spend time with others after being in self-isolation and losing his wife (Jesus, reading this back I am so sorry Guizhong and Zhongli. This got so depressing holy shit). 

“Please, you’re almost 27 nowz. Get yourself a man already, you have quite the options.” LOL I LOVE THAT SENTENCE HAHA. But ty^^ I’m so glad he came home with diluc. I BELIEVE IN YOU!! YOU’RE GONNA GET HIM. BRING YOUR MAN HOME!! I kinda wanna write some roommate hcs in my brainworm style. I’m going to go write that. Hang on. I’ll be back. 

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Happy Valentine’s Day everyone! Love from me 💕💕💕 

[midnightbedroom]

Plus

As this year comes to an end, I just want to give this time to actually reflect on what has happened this past decade.

It’s been simply phenomenal.

I’ve received, lost, and gained so much from the accumulation of experiences I’ve gone through. I don’t regret any of the things I’ve done because I know that it’s gotten me to this point of my life where I’m so content and happy with everything around me. I feel like all the stars and planets were planned to be aligned the way they were as I continued to grow throughout my life.

Let’s start off with school and my social life.

Well, the four schools I’ve attended throughout these ten years. In the beginning of this decade, I was in the Philippines, enjoying the presence of my aunt, uncle, grandma, and my cousins. I feel like I’ve received so much love and influence from them, and it’s crazy to think that they started my life right. I’ve gained so many friends who have taught me things I never would learn from anyone else. This was the start of how I actually perceived real friendships. Friendships that were so precious and just absolutely incredible. I started to see how friends should treat friends. All because of school and it’s given opportunities of growth. From this growth, I’ve met so much people who’s given me this potential to expand and become more than what I can see myself achieving. I actually got into reading, writing, and music writing. I never actually seen myself more than a regular school girl until I met so many artistic people that influenced me to become more. School had its ups and downs, but nevertheless, I enjoyed myself through the journey, especially the journey to finish high school. 

As I switched schools, I knew that I couldn’t really keep deep connections, so I learned how to become less attached. But as time moved on, I said “fuck it,” then continued to trust the process. As I went into middle school here into the states, I felt so lost and just straight up unwanted. I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted to do. But everything changed when I met Jasmine. She became my beacon into this dark world. She introduced me to embrace all the shit life throws at me, and she taught me to be strong. I appreciate her for choosing the right cards in the second day of math. If she and I never chose the right cards, I would’ve never met someone who is as passionate and trustworthy as her. 

Throughout high school, I’ve lost so much friends that I used to associate myself with in middle school. I feel like it was a weight lifted off my shoulder with a bit of residue left to torture me of “what could’ve been.” Regardless, I’ve learned to accept that some plans don’t tend to actually work out in the end. Even if I’ve lost these friends, I gained about 20 sisters. I joined Unarmed Fancy Drill Team, which was far most the best last minute decision I’ve ever made in my entire life. I never really planned on joining the team until it was my last decision. Throughout my time in the team, I’ve learned through sisterhood and trust. I’ve learned that there’s actual people, who aren’t in the same grade as you, who are willing to do the same fuck shit you do. It’s fucking amazing.

Now as high school is about to end, I’m still in JROTC and found myself to become the sergeant of the team, leading me to become the commander, then becoming one of the most important officers in the unit and the district. It’s crazy how four years can do to you. Regardless of all the stress it gave me, it’s turned me into a resilient leader who’s willing to do anything to let the program succeed. 

Switching to family.

I feel like there’s been so much change lately. Lately meaning ten years. I feel like these ten years has given me a chance to actually explore and know the true meaning of family. Although I wasn’t raised by biological parents, I knew that they still loved me in the back of my head when I met them the first time when I turned 7. It’s crazy how time can either make or break a relationship. 

I just feel so bad because I can’t be as close as I am to my parents as my friends are to their parents. I see them having inside jokes and just being completely open with each other, and it warms my heart but it left this scar that can never heal.

But as the time progress as I lived here in the states, I learned how to associate myself with my biological family. I got really close with JC as he taught me all the life lessons as I put them to use in my life here. I got close to Luke as he proceeds to teach me how to literally give no more than two shits about a certain situation or person who gives me nothing but negative energy. I am so grateful to live with two brothers who are here to look out for me whenever.

Moving onto love life.

Yikes.

Let’s just say, I had my fair amount of relationships. Some that benefitted my life and some that just completely crashed and burned my entire perception of love. As an elementary student, you shouldn’t even think of having a relationship with someone at all. PERIODT. Yet, I was one of those dumbasses who thought it WAS a necessity. Let’s call them out actually. So it started with Royce and Jose. Big yikes. Royce and Jose were the bestest of friends, and I guess I somewhat affected it? I don’t know. At least one of them made me feel that way. Royce was a love at first sight type. He and I were put into a group as we went through the haunted house together, and I guess I felt a connection? I don’t know to be honest. I feel dumber as I continue talking about this. Jose was actually one of my first few crushes in 3rd grade. He was attractive, and that’s about it. So my dumbass decided to end it with Royce because Jose finally paid attention to me. Damn, I’m stupid.

Anyways, middle school, another big Y I K E S. Guess who was attracted to boys who drunk, smoked, and was addicted to drugs? THIS GIRL. My first boyfriend was an addict. But, I don’t necessarily consider him as my first boyfriend considering that we only dated for two weeks. It was a one time spark feeling. I was a good girl and he was a bad boy, and that just didn’t work out. Then AH FUCK. Mans, Marcus. He was something. This is what I actually consider one of my FIRST actual relationships considering that we lasted for more than a year with a shitload of problems and breaks. He and I went through actual shit. Like ACTUAL shit. He introduced me to all the sexual shit, which we eventually got caught for. Imagine getting caught sucking dick at school and getting suspended for it. Then having your parents come to school to you explaining everything you’ve done. Yup. That shit. I had my phone deprived from me for about 5 months. I lived in complete darkness with no social life outside of school, but I did have Jasmine and she’s a complete homie. I continued the relationship regardless of how much tears and shit I had to put up through. Mans cheated on me three times, yet I still let it slide.

Starting high school, I was still on and off with Marcus, until I met a bigger pool of boys I didn’t know existed. I had a thing for a Junior, a Sophomore, and a Freshmen in a midst of the first few months of Freshmen year. Damn, I sound like I hoe. I might’ve dated a couple, but all of that stopped until mf Kyle came into my life. Let’s say Kyle was another serious relationship. He and I lasted for a year and a couple weeks. Kyle and i had serious trust issues. We were that couple that would get jealous easily, which would lead to one of us telling the other to block them out of their life for the sole reason of mistrust. It got really bad and toxic. It lead to the point where he had to break up with me through the phone while I was in another country. Sound shitty, right? 

That took a whole lot out of me since Kyle and I talked for six months straight before actually dating. He was basically my routine that I had to stop abruptly. That experience helped me grow and learn how to love myself more. I was basically at my prime in the summer going to junior year. All because of that heartbreak.

Junior year, I was a hoe. Periodt. 

I got so fed up with boys in my year, I started associating myself with boys younger than me, and let me tell you, that’s a whole ass mistake. Mans wasn’t ready for a relationship headass. Michael was one of them, and it sucks like hell because they don’t relate to the same experiences you’ve had. I was willing to wait, but he wasn’t.

Then I started letting go and meeting new people outside of school. I began attending more high school conferences in UCSD and SDSU. As I’ve attended these conferences, I met Danian. He and I instantly clicked, which was crazy. He attended a foreign school I didn’t even know existed. It’s insane how I wasn’t even aware that BOYS existed outside of my school.

We had a good run of a relationship. He and I were mainly mature throughout the entire time. It was my first time going through a long-distance relationship, and I wasn’t scared regardless of all the shit my friends gave me for it. It was all well until I started getting more busy with all the shit I put myself into. I got a job that paid, I got an internship district wide, and I had ROTC to deal with. I basically had limited time, but I still pulled through and gave him all the attention that I could give, but I guess that wasn’t enough.

He and I ended it way better than any of my past relationships. I dropped off all his stuff and we talked about everything before I left. It was nice feeling all the weight drop from my shoulders. 

I started focusing back onto myself again.

I continued being social, attended more conferences and programs that helped me build more connections like the Key Club Fall Rally in Six Flags. And man, let me tell you, it was one of the best investments I could possibly put myself into. I met so many people, surrounded myself with so much positivity; it was an irreplaceable time. 

Why? Well, it’s because I met this certain man.

HIs name is Presley, and I’m kinda sorta talking to him right now. 

Fuck, words can’t describe how much he means to me. I could write a whole ass book about him with an abundance supply of words. Presley is different from all the guys I’ve been with. He’s my definition of perfect. And although, perfect doesn’t exist, in my world, he is. I just feel like I’ve actually met the one. The one I can trust, vibe, and spend my life with. I feel like he’s what I would give in my time and money on just to make this relationship work. And regardless of the distance that separates us and the money it takes to even see each other, I feel like that wouldn’t matter because he’s fucking worth it. 

All the sleepless nights, all the worries just fade away as I get home and talk to him. Although a screen is the burden of this connection, the screen is also the reason why I get to see him and talk to him with the little amount of time we have in our busy lives. He’s so passionate about his work, and it amazes me how I met someone around my age who’s set in stone for what they want to do in their life. In the past, I would always have to be the one who’s concerned for the other individual’s plans, but for Presley, I don’t think I need to worry about a single thing. His life long plans drives him to become someone who he wants to be, and that’s all that matters. This self-motivation is hella attractive, and being able to face the world knowing what you want is absolutely amazing. I don’t think I’ll ever meet someone who’s this thoughtful and caring as he is.

Mans literally spent his entire night talking to me rather than getting sleep before his 9 hour shift, and that says a lot. He’s willing to give in the time and dedication to actually make this relationship work. I am so fucking grateful for him to the bits of my bones. I can’t believe I met the one.

I never exaggerate, but when I say he’s the one, he’s  t h e  one. Imagine talking to a guy who literally understands and empathizes with all your problems. Imagine having someone who’s just there every time when you need them, especially when you’re having a breakdown. Like what the fuck. Mans is literally a god sent angel. And I’m so blessed to have him in my life. I would literally use all my time just to talk to him because for some fucking reason, we can’t run out of things to talk about. He’s not like Marcus who I have to hype up for every two seconds. He’s not like Kyle where I had to be worried of everything he does. He’s not like Danian where I would literally force his undivided attention out. He’s literally Presley. He’s one of a kind. I trust him with all my guts, and I don’t think that’ll ever change.

I love him.

And the world around me agrees.

And so, to wrap up this reflection, I just want to say thank you for all the experiences and people I’ve gone through and spent my last ten years with. Because of the events leading up to this point, I’ve met the love of my life.

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays.

[groundramon]

Homph I finished tri and I wrote down my thoughts as I was watching because I had too many funny shitposts and nobody to share them with bc charlie hasn’t watched tri yet

PS i wont be reblogging tri spoilers (besides MINOR stuff like, digivolutions of already confirmed digivolution lines or non-spoilery shitposts, but I’ll try to tag shitposts as #tri spoilers anyways [digivolutions specific to tri ill tag as well but not ones that were already basically confirmed]) for a while so ur safe here!  I’m just gonna like everything/most things because then I can rb em to hisyaryumon lmao (also u should check out hisyaryumon....its me n charlie’s digimon blog)

EP 1:

- ok. alright. ok. good. they’re dealing with kari’s emotions now instead of just. nothing.  ok. alright. cool.  Still dont like how obscure/”artsy” they’re being with it, this is digimon not kagerou project, but ok.

- Also. I stand by tk and kari being one of the few good straight ships in digimon.  just saying.

- kari: this is my fault... me: god damn it shut up you little brat also me: god relatable ALSO me: ill take whatever display of emotions i can get

- I love how nobody believes tai is dead like.  They’re upset and worried but they’re also like “nah. he cant be. that fucking asshole just left us in our time of need” (actually only matt is the last one)

- Gabumon i would die for you also im crying and I think that’s the first time tri managed to make me fucking CRY

EP 2:

- I had thoughts but then the 02 kids happened and I entered another plane of reality.  I don’t feel real right now

- the only one I can remember is evil!gennai being a dumbass and being like “SUFFER AND SQUIRM YOU PATHETIC HUMANS AS YOU FIGHT OVER THE LAST SEAT” 1. humans are KNOWN for their ability to care for others you dumb obvious fuck and 2. is. is the entire tube going? because that tube can fit too people if they squish.  This isn’t a joke I’m serious it can.

- oh yeah also when i saw whomstever the fuck his name is (adult guy who i love but fuck names) and he was all bloodied i was like “its a cold day in hell when i see blood in digimon” (I think there was blood in an earlier ep but shh idc)

EP 3:

- didn’t nishijima start off as a fucking life coach to these kids.  What the fuck he was supposed to help them find a career not emotionally scar them by bloodily dying in front of one of them

- im realizing that the reason hackmon was always in his cloak, in the shadows, standing still is that they cannot animate him in any normal position for the life of him.  I drew him with better anatomy when i was 14 and didn’t have a tablet.  No seriously, look:

I didn’t say it wasn’t bad, you guys are just underestimating how bad the anatomy on this poor creature is.  Why cant ppl draw dracomon or hackmon correctly imma cry

- ordinemon has the best reaction faces

the best part about these two screenshots is that they literally cut one to the other, first the first one to the second one and then it cuts back to the first one.  They were really proud of these stupid ass expressions.

- I started overcoming my dissociation shock from the second episode and my hypercritical mind was analyzing the shit out of everything that happened (it is Not happy) but then evil!gennai called kari and evil goddess and idk if he’s exaggerating to make her feel bad or if she’s literally a fucking god of chaos and destruction and either way im like

she did kinda like.  Watch wizardmon die, watch tai die, watch gatomon get absorbed.  The dark ocean is just a metaphor for depression and honestly if 02 wasn’t all over the fucking place I think Kari would’ve had some pretty decent development in it.  Actually you know what, I’m using that as an angle to approach Tri at now, wish me luck bc i might actually give it more leeway now

EP 4:

- I’m not dissociating but I forgot to say anything again and I already forgot what happened

- Cant believe mei is fucking dead

EP 5:

- I like to imagine that Tai got there like a few minutes ago, but he was like “well damn guess yall figured it out without me.  alright ill just. see if I need to do anything” and then meicoomon was Still Bad so he waited for when she struck just to make the most badass entrance possible.  Fucking extra ass bitch

- I forgot to write anything again but uhhh I wasn’t satisfied so anyways lets just get into the Juicy Details

Originally I was actually planning to be kinder to Tri than I expected.  Was very invested during it.  ‘Round the end of the last ep I realized hmmm no this isn’t working out.  Where are the 02 kids.  You should’ve brought them in to save the day.  That would’ve been SO cool and SO fun.  Fucking cowards.

god I’m kinda tired so I’m going to address a couple things I still had problems with, note that this isn’t everything it’s just everything I felt comfortable yelling about without rewatching past eps.  Like I forgot nishijima was all bloodied and presumably died in the last part until they brought it up and I was like “????” ALSO DID THE LADY WHO WAS HIS PARTNER OR W/E KILL HERSELF WITH THE GUN SHE FOUND, I JUST REALIZED LITERALLY AS I WAS TYPING THIS THAT SHE FOUND A GUN AND THEN I THINK IT CUT TO BLACK AND I’M

DID SHE FUCKING KILL HERSELF WHAT THE FUCK

anyways my problems:

1. They did joe. really dirty.  I’ll write a more proper rant on this sometime later (mostly bc charlie is MUCH better at talking about joe than I am) but basically I can tell you that his character development in the movies squandered his OG character development.  He’s basically an entirely different person.  Like Tri joe isn’t bad, besides being largely neglected (yes he has a whole half a movie to himself, no that doesn’t make up for it all), its just...not OG joe.  He’s a fine character just not the same character, and its NOT fine when you put the two together.

2. THEY DID THE 02 KIDS EVEN DIRTIER IM SO BITTER sorry you nostalgia-blind, money-hungry fucks at bandai, but the 02 cast is PART OF THE ADVENTURES UNIVERSE.  The only people who hate 02 are ones who like the characters but hate the mess of the storyline at the end, or are completely irrational and elitist about their love of the digimon series and would greatly re-evaluate their opinions if they watched the original series and 02 back to back.  They couldn’t even show them in some kind of group montage at the end??? Standing in the background when they call Mei???  Why couldn’t they call mei from a home phone also, but that’s a less important problem idc that much.  It was a cute scene besides the lack of 02 characters.  Whatever.  AND THE PROBLEM IS LIKE kari and tk?  This entire time???  Were like “oh they disappeared. oops” instead of being frantically searching for their lost friends???  Like i get tk and kari probably have fucking ptsd and can’t express any emotions because they watched important people die in front of their eyes at an incredibly young age but also 1. they didn’t address the ramifications of ptsd, so fuck that theory/excuse and 2. THAT??? WOULD ONLY MAKE THEM LOOK HARDER??? and put on a brave face as they look, but inside they’re so scared and so worried.  Not just “oh sweet, they were found/saved, theyre in the hospital but that’s fine” like WHAT theyre fucking assholes if that’s what they’d canonically do lmao.  God I am SO bitter over the ENTIRE thing with the 02 kids, it would’ve been BETTER if they were deleted from the fucking canon entirely.  Would I have still been bitter?  Yes.  But at least I wouldn’t be madder at TK and Kari too.

3. I stand 100% by the notion that Digimon is not and will never be cut out to be an adults’ franchise.  It wasn’t designed for adults, and it can’t be skewered towards adults.  These particular characters were designed for kids to relate to and find entertaining.  They do not work when placed into an adult setting.  Like, can you imagine a character like Ed from FMA going to the Digimon world?  I guess in a way that’s just Marcus but like.  Just imagine the FMA cast in Digimon Adventure.  It doesn’t work.  Digimon Tri is basically that except real.  Also Data Squad was darker than Adventure so my joke doesn’t even work.

I guess my primary point is that Tri isn’t mature enough of a setup for an adult audience.  It puts a focus on being “complex” and “philosophical” instead of working within Digimon’s constraints and making something good and adult out of that.  Like!  Digimon is a fucking TOY COMMERCIAL.  Don’t give me messages about the futility of human life.  I want bad puns and emotional characters.  That’s what Digimon has ALWAYS been, and ideally always will be.  Tri could’ve made itself more mature by dealing with the ramifications of the Digital World’s events, how it affected the kids psychologically and dealing with healing old scars.  It would’ve been a more mature take on a story we loved and would use things we loved about the story already - the fact that it took so much time exploring characters’ emotions and was surprisingly mature for the time - to make itself better.  You need to take the aspects that drew adults to the show and amplify them, not just slap on a complex story and unfunny dialogue and be like “oh this is fine, right?”

It’s not that Digimon can’t exist as an adult property, its just that if it repeats what Tri did, it’s got no merit and in my eyes the franchise is dead.  If it survives I guess I’ll be happy that people can still enjoy it but I find it unsustainable and unsatisfying to fans of the older series.  Tri is just a fuckfest of highly specific nostalgia that tries too hard to appeal to old fans without capturing what made the original series so magical, and in part thats because the original series WASN’T FOR ADULTS.  I don’t know about the Digimon Story games, bc they’re T-rated so perhaps they’re a better take on an adult Digimon story than Tri?  But you either need to make your own characters and lore specifically for an adult-oriented Digimon season, or perish.  Also, please make it a series and not a group of movies.  Getting four eps every 6-9 months was hell.

I stand by saying Appmon is a more faithful Digimon season than Tri to Digimon’s original spirit.  I believe it holds more potential for success than Tri and better embodies the spirit of the older Digimon seasons.  It’s dumb, its corny, it has horrible puns, but I LOVE it because it also has a deep dark story and emotional moments.  If you dislike Tri and you agree with things I said that make it unlikeable, I highly recommend giving Appmon a chance - if you watch a few episodes and think “oh yeah, I guess this is decent” you’re going to like it.  It’s everything Digimon has always been and hopefully always will be, just with a different concept.  And hopefully the end of the series doesn’t leave a sour taste in my mouth and I have to redact this statement haha since I’m not done with it yet, but I’ve heard good things about it so I’m hoping not so.

Overall, if you watch Tri, don’t get your hopes up.  It resolves everything okay-ish but it’s a pretty forgettable anime on its own and simply doesn’t work as part of the Digimon franchise.

I am, however, pretty interested in what evil!gennai said at the end about Diaboromon and Daemon.  It raises interesting questions about the timeline too.  We know Daemon is in the dark ocean, so perhaps that’s a hint at a future project?  (They did confirm a future project btw, in conjunction with tri being over)  But what about Diaboromon?  I dont believe that Our War Game (I think thats what its called?) took place after Tri, based on the outfits and ages and stuff, but I also don’t remember the movies that well.  Could Diaboromon still be out there too?  It’s interesting.

However, because of the lackluster performance of Tri, I don’t have my hopes up and I really hope that this “next project” goes in a different direction.  Although I guess if they include the 02 kids, I’ll be somewhat less salty...

Side note, did they ever explain why the gennais went evil?  Like ?  That’s a pretty important thing.  The gennais helped SAVE the human world in 02.  And I get that apparently Tri is ignoring 02′s ending but still.  It’s shitty, because Gennai was still a good guy in the original too (and also they cant just keep is younger look and act like 02 never happened)  MAYBE its something I missed but I dont think so.  God there’s just.  So much wrong with Tri.  I’m very displeased and very bitter and I wanna get back to Appmon asap.

It’s got good moments, its got bad moments, I dont know, I don’t care.  There’s nothing wrong with you if you like it, there’s nothing wrong with you if you don’t, and there’s nothing wrong with you if you flip flop and are split like me.  I just wish Tri fulfilled its potential instead of becoming a boring mess.

[shananaomi]

2016.

hi. i haven’t been around these parts much this year, but i couldn’t quite let this one go by. 

here’s last year’s.

[note to self at end of 2017: you deleted anything you didn’t feel up to answering, so maybe go find a complete version if you’re into that sort of thing now.]

What did you do in 2016 that you’d never done before?

Went to Paris, then drove around the French countryside in a tiny car, just as I’d imagined ever since seeing Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown, as a little kid. (Fewer haunted chateaus, more champagne.) Ran a 10k and only truly hated the last mile of it. Watched my wife run a marathon. Finally started reading Harry Potter, but only made it through 2.5 books before it...scared me too much to keep going. 

Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions and will you make more for next year?

Last year: I vowed to prioritize watching more TV shows by and about women, and largely stuck to this and its corollary “no more whiny white guys.”

Also, in answer to the question about what I wish I had done more of in 2015, I said (pre-Hamilton, I should add): I’m sure it means something that every year my answer to this is write. It means I’m never satisfied, right?

Today on Twitter I said: has there ever been a year my resolution was not "write more; complain less"?

Also, per @yayponies, we are going to #GetFitToFightFascism. 

Did anyone close to you give birth?

Several people we love now have more children! And several more are about to.

Did anyone close to you get married?

I...don’t think we went to any weddings this year, or missed any big ones.

Did anyone close to you die?

2016 was definitely the year for crying over people who felt so close it stabbed inside to know they were gone, from Bowie to those killed in Orlando to George Michael.

What countries did you visit?

France! It was beautiful and also intense, like more of a city than even New York but in less space and smaller streets. In many ways the general nervousness and militarization reminded me of New York City post-9/11. 

What would you like to have in 2017 that you lacked in 2016?

A sense of safety, both personal and global.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

In order to avoid getting a spinal tap or going on a scary-sounding drug to reduce high pressure in my skull, I got a personal trainer, finally stopped eating anything and everything I wanted, and lost 30 pounds. Then I sort of plateaued, or in fitness-speak, maintained that weight successfully for the last 4 months while magically continuing to wear ever-smaller clothes. I’ve set a goal for at least 10 more pounds by the time I turn 40 in April, because that was a random thing I told myself a year ago I could try to do but sounded impossible at the time. 

But I also discovered that I fucking love hiking and even running outside and generally feeling stronger. And before 2016 totally and completely went to shit, I knew looking back that would be my biggest story of the year: I finally put real work into my body, and it was worth it.

What was your biggest failure?

Outside of the never-ending churn of work emails, I have become a terrible, almost entirely absent correspondent. I almost never reply to emails any more, and even text messages often go unanswered. I am so ashamed of this behavior I can barely type it out, honestly, and yet it is somehow the greatest tiny step to take in any free moment I find or set aside for specifically that purpose. 

If I have failed at some point or many to write you back, know it was certainly not because of anything you said, or didn’t.  

Did you suffer illness or injury?

I did something of a mid-year review on my birthday where I wrote about the medical mystery in my brain that dominated the end of 2015 and first half of this year. I’m very lucky; another few rounds of check-ups found my high pressure situation so reduced it was basically now undiagnosable. Also I avoided having a spinal tap, thank fucking god. My great USC Eye Institute doc left for another city but I have a follow-up in January with a guy who basically wrote the book on neuro-ophthalmology so we’ll see whether a true second opinion changes any of that. 

What was the best thing you bought?

It’s not that I don’t like working out with other people. Wait, yes it is. I survived a month of boot camp in 2015 out of sheer stubbornness but hated myself and my body more by the end of it than I’d ever thought possible. But in a one-on-one situation, it turns out I can just channel all that stubborn perfectionism into something meaningful. It was a massive investment, and one I plan to continue in 2017, but there is really no question to me that it was worth it.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

My wife. Did I mention she ran a goddamned marathon? In that and so, so many other ways, she is so much stronger than she thinks or believes and inspires me every day to keep going.

Where did most of your money go?

Trainer, rent, car payment, student loans. Mostly all those old familiar beasts. 

What song will always remind you of 2016?

“Youth,” Troye Sivan. Sitting by a pool in Palm Springs listening to him sing and writing about him and feeling pretty goddamned blessed. 

not a bad view to get serious on a deadline.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Sadder. There’s just no other way to say that. 

ii. thinner or fatter? Thinner!

iii. richer or poorer? We’re being more careful about money now than we have at times in the past, I’ll put it that way.

What do you wish you’d done more of?

Always: write. But I need to think a little more specifically about what that means for me right now. I run a major media outlet at which I could theoretically write almost anything, but almost never do. Part of what I most miss writing about is queerness and sexuality, but I am not totally sure what, if anything, I want to write for OUT. Should I write fiction? Should I be trying to write and report other, more politically focused pieces (either about entertainment in some way or not)? Should I do something with this TinyLetter I signed up for but have yet to use? Should I write more Tumblr posts? 

Oh yeah, and when am I going to do this? It’s not that I have no time, but I don’t have huge swaths of it either just sitting around waiting to be claimed. I can do this, if I really focus and prioritize. Having some kind of goal type thingie or vision here would obviously go a long way. 

What do you wish you’d done less of?

Crying.

How did you spend Christmas?

Writing George Michael’s obit. 

this is the ridiculous family photo we took on a street near my parents' new house - just before my phone buzzed with the news of George Michael's death. i'm just completely heartbroken. our first conversation, first date, first I love yous - all owe something big to our gay guardian angel, as we always called him. thank you George for being queer and angry and so, so, so beautifully talented. thank you.

What was your favorite TV program?

Save Pitch!

What was the best book you read?

Probably Julia Child’s memoirs, the perfect pre-France guide and also a reminder that a woman can find her way to a whole new life no matter her age. I also adored my old friend Tim Murphy’s novel Christodora. Highly recommended.

What was your greatest musical discovery of 2016?

This should fairly be answered Hamilton, since it took me a while to decide I was ready to jump in even if I wasn’t sure when I’d get to see it. I’m in. All in.

What did you want and get?

To spoil my wife silly on her 40th birthday, including a slightly early trip back to Paris in honor of our first conversation being about her trip there on her 30th. I am traditionally the distant second place present-giver in our relationship, but I think I adequately stepped it up this time.

What did you want and not get?

For our happiness to be as simple as finding the perfect present. A country I felt confident loved us back. My dog to feel as peaceful and calm and quiet as she does when she’s not in Los Angeles. For all the words and thoughts inside my brain to magically appear on a screen or the page without having to find the time or peace to make sense of them.

What was your favorite film of this year?

I did vow to do a better job of seeing films this year, especially big ones that I needed to consider how much work-time to devote coverage to, so maybe that’s why I feel like I have a surprisingly strong, solid list here to choose from. I don’t think I saw Spotlight until 2016, when I watched it back to back on a plane before All the President’s Men. (Don’t yell but: Spotlight was better.) I absolutely loved Arrival and Loving. I don’t plan to give into the weird backlash cynicism about La La Land, which I found delightful if not exactly epic.

Ultimately I think my answer here is that Moonlight and Hell or High Water touched my soul and heart and made me think the most. They are both, in distinctly different ways, about the deep, lasting curse of poverty. In Hell or High Water, Chris Pine’s character eventually offers this terse motivation for a deadly bank robbing spree he has undertaken with his brother: “I’ve been poor my whole life, like a disease passing from generation to generation. But not my boys, not anymore.”

For whatever reason, I’m thinking now about how some people have compared Moonlight to Brokeback Mountain. (I would have compared the latter to Loving, actually, in that they both turn very much on the passionate decisions of reticent white men acting on emotions they cannot figure out how to name.) I guess what people are saying is that Moonlight is also a groundbreaking film about sexuality, but to me what was always missed about Brokeback is that it was a film about a poor man’s sexuality. 

Moonlight very pointedly creates a new possible dialogue to model in conversations about being black and queer - when asked what a faggot is, Chiron is told, “‘Faggot’ is a word used to make gay people feel bad.” And it asks an even harder question: can sexuality and our expression of it ever be separated from the sheer human need to survive other, perhaps unrelated or perhaps more complicated and threatening circumstances of race and class?

I guess I had some things to say about movies this year. 

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 39, and one of the only long form pieces I wrote this year actually covers that territory too! 

What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Sigh. A Clinton presidency. That’s not one thing, it’s a million, but that’s the goddamned point, isn’t it?

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2016?

Last year I said: I’m damned determined for 2016 to be the year of the lipstick.

And actually I did pretty well on that count. Also I bought some impressively ridiculous over-the-knee boots that I’ve worn almost every day since. 

What kept you sane?

Was I? I still feel pretty unhinged, honestly. My staff and colleagues were actually a consistent source of stability even when there were major changes in that world, too. (Part of CBS basically sold us to a different part of CBS.) 

But each and every day: my wife. This marriage is the best and most important thing I will ever do in my life, and whatever “work” it may be, it pays back in sustaining my existence a hundredfold. Coming soon, allegedly: a podcast and/or Insta live series with me and @yayponies called Marriage Is Hard. (No it’s not.)

Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Oh hey, I finally got to introduce my wife to Chris Pine when we bumped into him at the reception after the Loving premiere/screening. (Sorry-not-sorry for the utter LAness of that sentence.) I kind of hate reintroducing myself to people I interviewed years before, but in this case: worth every moment of internal awkwardness. He has very strong feelings about cinematography, you guys. And projectionists. And cheesy grits.

What political issue stirred you the most?

I am sickened by the fact that young trans and gender-nonconforming folks are bearing the brunt of the right-wing’s latest scare and hate tactics. I am not scared for my marriage headed into a new administration; I am terrified for their lives. 

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

America. All of us.

Who did you miss?

I miss...people. I miss Sunday potluck dinners like Ray and I threw in college, the kind that were just about people having a safe space but then really about organizing, but I’m still not sure how to create those in our lives right now in a way that doesn’t create more anxiety for us than it relieves. I’m putting this here in hopes some other folks might have an idea. Maybe I’ll even be bold enough to put it in its own post. 

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2016.

"I’VE BEEN PLANNING WHILE YOU’RE PLAYING.” -- Jenny Holzer

We saw this at the Broad. Jessica did a better job of writing about it.

Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Raise a glass to freedom Something they can never take away No matter what they tell you Raise a glass to the four of us Tomorrow there’ll be more of us

What is one photo that represents a moment you want to remember?

Here we are on an impossibly beautiful day in Paris after one of the best meals of my life, grinning like fools and taking photos that don’t even look real. 

even as we were taking this photo I knew it would look super fake. but it's not! I mean that palm tree was definitely brought in special but it was there when we went to pick up our bibs. oh yeah, we're running a 6k-but-probably-more-like-8k through the streets of Paris tomorrow along with about 35,000 other women. (and by running I mean trying not to fall too far behind the pack.) #laparisienne

[theaveragekenyan]

New Sensation...

The English have so many alternate names for their Police Officers.

Bobbies, Rozzers, Cops, Filth, Peelers, Old Bill, Plod, Boys in Blue, Fuzz, Pigs. Those are the ones I know, but I’m sure there’s a whole host of County Line inspired updates I don’t.

Here in Kenya, whether it’s out of respect or fear, I’ve only ever heard the Police given one nickname, Cop, that’s it, Cop, nothing creative about that at all.

Creativity to me, is not just about the ability to draw a lovely picture of a horse, create the next big thing on Amazon or share a witty meme on Instagram, I see it as problem solving for both individuals and groups. And with so many worldwide problems to deal with, it’s an endless source of creativity that should drive us all to make the necessary fixes to life.

The average Kenyan is highly creative and just like everybody, they can make the hardest of tasks seem easy and the simplest of tasks seem hard 

However, from what I’ve witnessed, although creativity comes easy, using their imagination is a different story. Things are taken literally, and as a Brit, this is where i’m translated with confusion.

Phrases like “it’s time for these guys to pull their fingers out their arses” and “It’s like flogging a dead Donkey” are imagined as said and will be met with “stay away from my donkey”

I watched the film “Missing Link” and this literal interpretation theme is one of the difficulties covered in the movie. How cultures, especially my own English one, take their sayings for granted and then become disappointed when those listening from a different background don’t understand or become confused and take things literally. 

I get it, and obviously I’ve changed my syntax to survive, but it’s not that straight forward.

I remember a cleaner that worked for us for a short time, she would love to chat to my daughter about this and that. One day my daughter picked up the cleaners cleaning cloth and flapped it around making it appear to have wings, my daughter said “look, it’s a butterfly” the lady said “no, it’s a cleaning cloth”

I saw the deflated look on my daughter’s face, she was old enough to use her imagination to turn a cleaning cloth into a butterfly, but not yet old enough to clarify the nullifying situation with the cleaner, so I did, I had to. I pointed out that in my daughter’s world anything can be imagined, it’s called pretend “she’s imagining the cloth is a butterfly”, “oh” responded the cleaner and that was enough for her satisfaction and back to her work she went.

That moment stands out for me, I realised then, that up to that point why I’d struggled in so many previous conversations or when I’d be giving explanations or when I would describe something particular, it’s because for many people in Kenya, using their imaginations is not encouraged.

Don’t ever get too invested when giving directions to a Kenyan. What you’re seeing in your head will be a fair visualisation of streets, turns, junctions, bends, signs, landmarks etc, or in my case Terminator visuals, whereas inside the average Kenyan’s head is a picture of a Mandazi. Opposite, adjacent, straight ahead, 1st left, 300 meters on your right all mean nothing. Keep things simple e.g. “straight ahead and ask the next person you see once you’re lost again”

Don’t ever physically with a finger point to something, in true Bruce Lee fashion the average Kenyan will stare at the finger unaware you are imagining a space and line to the object you are pointing toward.

As well, unless it’s a quote or parable from the Bible, don’t ever speak rhetorically, it doesn’t work. Kenyan’s focus on the wrong part of the comparison and will have difficulty in finding the required imaginary jump to understand the context of the question.

For instance, a question like “Let’s imagine you are in charge of the country right now, what would you change?” for most people, this is an easy question to answer, i.e; personally I’d Increase Health Spending, Stop Corruption, Change the style of Education, easy things for me to imagine I’d change if I were sat at State House’s largest desk. Ask the average Kenyan that question and they will deconstruct it differently, they’ll be wondering how did this happen? how am I in charge? how many died along the way? who are my allies? do I have a driver? what’s for breakfast? what do you want me to change?

I think it starts at the beginning from childhood and then right through the standard education system, by which time it’s often too late.

From what I’ve seen, through visiting schools here, although there is so much love taught, the emphasis of education remains about God, neat handwriting, counting from 1 to 100, tracing and copying, colouring in between the lines, call and repeat.

I’ve noticed it commonly with parents as well. Every child has an imagination, they are born with it and there’s no stopping it, well in Kenya there is. Whilst out with friends I’ll see the children playing and they’ll be mimicking either something they’ve seen a friend do, or perhaps seen on the television, maybe simply galloping around screaming “I’M A HORSE NEIIIIIGH”. And yet when this happens, so many times the parent will show embarrassment and say “too many cartoons”. The use of their imagination is viewed through an embarrassment filter rather than through a “I’m so happy my child has an imagination” type.

Education here is a cramming exercise, it’s about repetition, tracing, copying, being as one person. In a class everybody should be the same, hold the same opinion, write the same, have the same outlook on life. Whilst this maintains an easy teaching day, it drives out all forms of originality and uniqueness. Personalities therefore struggle to adapt to what’s actually going on inside their growing brains.

This then continues into the workplace. There’s a routine way of doing things, but anything outside of that binary logic can be impossible.

I work in a creative industry which has always been interesting in Kenya.

I’ve had the privilege to work with some of the best young creative talent in Kenya, but there have been too far few to realise their potential.

The work, in terms of ‘doing the work’, is easy for a Kenyan, but because it is often devoid of imagination, ‘the work’ actually becomes a challenge.

What tends to happen is, a Kenyan will happily follow a clear set of instructions a>b>c>d>e>f>g, but when required to fill in those imaginary gaps between the letters and work instinctively, creatively and via ones own imagination, it’s not easy. From a business point of view, this is why I’ve never been successful in Kenya, I’ve had too many closed minds to face.

One of my jobs is to create media for various corporate clients and NGO’s.

The standard corporate client / NGO employee is a bean pusher who goes home satisfied they’ve made a difference to the redevelopment of Kenya. Where in reality, they’ve been hired to do a job, which is just like any other job, it pays the bills.

However now, their standard boring job is about to get better because they’ve just been tasked to produce a video for their donors to watch once.

This new sidetrack from their normal mundane procedures is exciting because they are now about to turn into Kathryn Bigelow or Christopher Nolan.

The project always gets off to a wonderful start, plenty of glossy chat with all the latest American buzz words shoehorned into conversation, and I’m now working with somebody who’s sole object is to justify their donor’s generosity via a video presentation, and they know nothing at all about video presentation.

I give them my vision, I explain how the video will look, run them through a script, explain how graphics will aid the viewer digest the story and explain the importance of a schedule.  The employee will love all of this, but deep down, they have no idea what’s just been said, so will say something like “Great, the implementation of the discourse embraces the cultural impact via a holistic medium social intervention, yes?” “fuck off you knob-head”,I say in my imagination.

Next is when they come on location and hang out with people way cooler than at their office, they get the full Hollywood treatment.

They’ll be amazed at how long it takes to set up a shot, they’ll deliver their predictable classic lines perfectly, such as “Wow, I never knew it took this long to set up” they’ll offer standard creative opinion like “I think it would look nice if we shot over against the flowers”. They’ll howl with laughter when the interviewee says a wrong word or fluffs their lines and asks “we can go again, right” Oh how they love this part of production, by now they’ll have the confidence to say “Yes, of course you can answer again, It’s all edited in post-production” WOW, the Muppet has officially graduated their short media production course and now knows how to run this shit.

Of course, within 3 minutes of starting the recorded interview, the dull NGO employee is now utterly bored and on their phone and waiting for the first opportunity to flex their new media production knowledge by saying “this will take how much longer?” I have to feel sorry for them, usually when they’re ‘out of the office’ it’s usually at a “retreat” in Mombasa, drinking tea every 15 minutes, so once the reality sets in that media production is not as exciting as they thought it would be, the day becomes boring for them, so it’s back to their phone and generally disrupting the production as much as they can.

Then at the end of day once everybody has said “I think that went well” it’s off to post-production we go.

This is when the clients come into their own, for it is only now when they will display their total lack of imagination having seeing the first version of the video presentation and they can say, “I didn’t think it would look like this”

And here we are, imagination. They were never able to picture or visualize what was said right at the beginning of the project. What the camera was recording whilst they were on location and even what they glimpsed through the viewfinder is now all irrelevant. Now they can see something physical, now they turn back into Bigelow or Nolan and essentially are disappointed because it doesn’t look like “The Dark Knight”

Then comes the prosaic process of back and forth, change, review, update, review, update and review the video until the final product resembles something as close as can be to a power-point presentation. It is now ready for upload to their YouTube channel to gain its 43 views.

The bean-pusher goes back to their regular job of attending conferences and power-point training and the whole experience is forgotten.

The good news is, the system of Kenyan education is changing. A new scheme called Competency-Based Curriculum, CBC is to be introduced.

The Government is implementing new teaching methods and will gradually phase out old ones in an attempt to modernise an outdated system that hasn’t changed for a long time, essentially the education system never updated from Windows 1.

Problem is, there are about 3 generations of teachers currently teaching in that system who find it difficult to upgrade, sadly there are too many fearful of change. From what I have learnt is that within the new CBC application, one of its 7 core themes is ‘Imagination and Creativity’ Great! However, I feel this new way of teaching, coupled with the sizeable change in approach will take this country a long time to switch over to. And then of course is the actual reality of either CBC being fully installed or it reverting back to the Windows 1 version again, only time will tell.

Hopefully though, with some new ways of thinking by the real Kenyan’s that genuinely can buck the trend, by leading the way and teaching the average Kenyan just how good Kenya can be if they use their imagination, then there will be real-time visible, scalable and unmitigated empowerment throughout society as a whole, in the words pf some dull NGO employee.

[jumpsitehq]

200 Best Sarcasm Quotes and Sarcasm Sayings & Messages

Ever wish to be honest without hurting somebody’s feelings? One perfect way to do it is through sarcasm. It’s funny and witty, brings humor into our lives but it gives the most brutal kind of honesty too. So here we collected some of awesome 99 Best Sarcasm Quotes and Sarcasm Sayings & Messages. Even some of the best life lessons we learn are from the most sarcastic quotes we read over the internet or from our dearest friends and family. Although some people find it difficult to understand the hidden meaning of our sarcastic messages, others have no problem in finding the sense of it at all. We also have a great collection of Insomnia Quotes & Angry Status.

200 Best Sarcastic Quotes

1. I’M 2% Cute & 98% Single. 2. All You Need Is Love 5M $. 3. I’M Like Monday. Nobody Likes Me. 4. True Love: I Love More Than Free Wi-Fi. 5. Your Crush + Fast Replies = Imagination. 6. I’ve Never Faked A Sarcasm In My Life. 7. Are You Free Tomorrow? No I’M Expensive. 8. I Love Education But Without Examination. 9. Avracadabra ! Nope. You’re Still A Bitch. 10. You Remind Me Of My Chinese Friend. Ug Lee 11. World Biggest Lie ” I’ll Always With You “. 12. Let’s Just Stay Friends = Never Talk Again. 13. Money Can Buy Happiness, It’s Called “Food”. 14. First Rule Of 2017 ” Never Talk About 2016 “. 15. Conjuring 2 Is For Kids. Real Men Get Married. 16. Not Everyone Likes Me But Not Everyone Matters. 17. If You Are Late, Don’t Rush You’re Already Late. 18. Sarcasm : Just One Of The Many Services I Offer. 19. If You Don’t Have Something Nice To Say, Hush It. 20. I Don’t Understand You. I Don’t Speak Assholian. 21. Always Be Yourself, Except During Job Interviews. 22. Losing Your Best Friend Is Worse Than A Break Up. 23. I Am ” Eats Ice Cream In Winter ” Type Of Person. 24. Single Bell….Single Bell….Single All The Way. 25. Life Is Full Of Fake People. Don’t Trust Blindly. 26. I Would Slap You, But That Would Be Animal Abuse. ( Sarcasm Quotes . 27. Every Year Thousand People Quit Smoking, By Dying ! 28. I’M Single Because Nobody Believes That I’M Single. 29. I Was On Diet For 30 Days & All I Lost Was 30 Days. 30. Yes, I’M Online 24X7, But I Hardly Chat With Anyone. 31. If Nobody Hates You. You Are Doing Something Boring. 32. People Get Mad When You Treat Them How They Treat You. 33. Happiness Is You And Your Best Friend Hate Same Person. 34. Sarcasm Is The Body’s Natural Defense Against Stupidity. ( Sarcasm Quotes . 35. Tip For 2017 : Don’t Get Emotionally Attached To Anyone. 36. My Secret Talent Is Getting Tired Without Doing Anything. 37. Don’t Remind Me How Old I Am ! I’ll Always Watch Cartoons. 38. My Problem Is That I Hate Maths But I Love Counting Money. 39. I Love All The Religions Because They All Bring Holidays ! 40. Studying Is My Drug. But Thanks To God. I Say No To Drugs.

Sarcasm Quotes for Twitter

41. Don’t Be Ashamed Of Who You Are. That’s Your Parent’s Job. 42. Everyone Is Matured Until Someone Brings Out Bubble Wrap ! 43. To Be Old & Wise, You Must First Have To Be Young & Stupid. 44. Sarcasm : Because Beating The Crap Out Of People Is Illegal. 45. The Hardest Part Of My Job Is…Being Nice To Stupid People ! 46. Never Laugh At Your Girlfriend’s Choice. You Are One Of Them. 47. It’s Okay If You Don’t Like Me…Not Everyone Has Good Taste. 48. If You Want A Sarcastic Answer, Don’t Ask A Stupid Question. 49. I Live For Two Reasons. 1 . I Was Born 2 . I Haven’t Died Yet. 50. Tom & Jerry Taught Me That Life Is Incomplete Without Enemies. 51. Dear 2017 : Make Sure You Don’t Come Up With Temporary People ! 52. I’M Actually Not Funny. I’M Just Mean & People Think I’M Joking. 53. I Don’t Believe In Plastic Surgery. But In Your Case, Go Ahead. 54. Brain Logic : Let’s Insult Our Best Friend Ore Than Our Enemies. 55. Just Wanna Be Rich Enough To Buy My Mom Everything She Deserves. 56. Show Me You’re Different & I won’t Treat You Like You’re Typical. 57. Thanks To The Wrong People In Life. They Teach The Right Lessons. 58. Sarcasm : The Ability To Insult Idiots Without Them Realizing It. 59. I’M Sorry What Language Are You Speaking ? It Sounds Like Bullshit. 60. Behind Every Successful Person…There’s Lot Of Unsuccessful Years.

61. Damaged People Are More Dangerous Because They Know How To Survive. 62. Everything Is Like Either Expensive, Illegal Or Won’t Text Me Back. 63. The World Is Filled With Good People. If You Can’t Find One, Be One. 64. 3 People Who Call Me. 1. My Mom. 2 . Wrong Number. 3 . Customer Care. 65. Closing Your Eyes After Turning Off The Alarm Is Very Dangerous Game. 66. Don’t Respect Her Because She’s A Girl. Respect Her Because You’re Man. 67. If The Teacher Tell You To Get Out, It Means You Have Won The Argument. 68. The Luckiest Are Those Who Fall Asleep As Soon As They Close Their Eyes. 69. Why People Buy Guitars Now A Days. 10% To Play, 90% To Click Profile Pic. 70. I Want One Of Those Jobs Where I Get Paid For Travelling Around The World. 71. Don’t Judge A Book By It’s Cover. Don’t Judge A Student By His Percentage. 72. May Be You Should Eat Some Makeup So You Can Be Pretty On The Inside Too. 73. My Girlfriend Is So Good At Playing Hide And Seek. I Haven’t Found Her Yet. 74. We Don’t Need Cctv Camera In Our Country. Neighbours & Relatives Are Enough. 75. When People Ask Stupid Questions I Feel Obligated To Give Sarcastic Answers. 76. I Don’t Care What People Think Of Me. At Least Mosquitoes Find Me Attractive ! 77. When I’M Free No One Texts Me ! & When I’M Busy. Bam ! Still No One Texts Me ! 78. True Bonding Is When You And Your Friends Are All Angry About The Same Thing. 79. If You Think Nobody Cares If You’re Alive, Try Missing A Couple Of Car Payments. 80. We All Have That One Teacher Who Give You Amazing Marks On Matter What You Write.

Sarcasm Quotes for Facebook

81. From The Moment I Saw You, I Knew I Was Gonna Spend He Rest Of My Life Avoiding You. 82. Babies Are So Lucky. They Can Sleep All The Day And Everyone Still Would Be Proud Of Them. 83. I’M Sorry I Hurt Your Feelings When I Called You Stupid. I Really Thought You Already Knew. 84. You Cried All Night ? You Were Hurt ? And No One Knows ? Congratulations ! You Are Mature Now. 85. I May Look Calm, But Inside My Mind I’ve Killed You 20 Times, In 5 Mins, In 20 Different Ways. 86. My Attitude In Exams. They Give Me Questions I Don’t Know. I Give Them Answers They Don’t Know. 87. I Can Only Please One Person Per Day. Today Is Not Your Day. Tomorrow Doesn’t Look Good Either. 88. I Love Texting People Who Reply Super Fast. It Makes Me Feel Like They Really Want To Talk To Me. 89. Bring Able To Respond With Sarcasm Within Seconds Of Stupid Question Is A Sign Of A Healthy Brain. 90. At Age Of 25, Others Want To Get Married And Have Kids But I Want My Parents In The Backseat Of My Audi 91. There Are Two Types Of People In The World. 1 . People Who Understand And Appreciate Sarcasm 2 . Idoits. 92. Askhole. A Person Who Constantly Asks For Your Advice, Yet Always Does The Opposite Of What You Told Them. 93. Need Money For College. Need College For A Job. Need A Job For Money. Who Was The Mastermind Behind This System ? 94. What’s The Point Of Education If You Still Throw Garbage On Street To Be Ultimately Picked By An Uneducated Person ? 95. If You Want To Change The World, Do It While You’re Single. Once You’re Married You Can’t Even Change The T.V Channel. 96. Not All Girls Are Made Of Sugar And Spice And Everything Nice. Some Girls Are Made Of Sarcasm, Wind And Everything Fine. 97. I’M Sorry, I Didn’t Realize That You’re And Expert On My Life And How I Should Live It ! Please Continue While I Takes Notes. 98. The Whole Purpose Of Sending A Text Is To Get A Reply Within Seconds Or Minutes Otherwise I Would Have Sent A Letter By F***In Mail. 99. My Future Wife Would Be Probably Texting Her Boyfriend About How They’re Gonna Stay Together. Haha, See You In A Couple Of Years, Sweetie. 100. Don’t worry about hurting my feelings, because I guarantee you not one bit of my self-esteem is tied up in your acceptance.

101. They say women speak 20,000 words a day. I have a daughter who gets that done by breakfast. 102. Excuse me, which level of hell is this? 103. When I’m feeling down and someone says “suck it up”, I get the urge to break their legs and say, “walk it off”. 104. You know that little voice inside your head that keeps you from saying things you shouldn’t? Yeah, I don’t have that. 105. You know what I like about people? Their dogs. 106. People who reply to my sarcasm with sarcasm are my favorite. 107. Have you ever met someone and thought, “There goes the reason why contraceptives were invented?” 108. I’d slap you but that would be animal abuse. 109. Most people have “Ah ha” moments. I have “Oh for f..ck’s sake, f..ck this shit” moments. 110. I have to stop saying how stupid you can be. Some people are starting to take it as a challenge. 111. I think Dildo is a perfectly acceptable insult. I’d call you a d..ck but you’re not real enough. 112. If your phone doesn’t ring, it’s me. 113. When something goes wrong in your life, just yell “Plot Twist” and move on. 114. If someone points at your black clothes and asks, whose funeral it is, you just look around the room, and answer, “haven’t decided yet.” 115. Sweetie, leave the sarcasm and insults to the pros. You’re going to hurt yourself. Go play in traffic. 116. What’s a queen without her king? Well, historically, better. 117. Abracadabra! Nope. You’re still a b..ch. 118. Oh. I’m sorry. Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? 119. When people see you laying down with your eyes closed, they still ask “Are you sleeping?” And I’m like, “No. I’m training to die.” 120. Come here you big, beautiful cup of coffee and lie to me about how much we’re going to get done today.

Sarcasm Quotes for Whatsapp

121. My alone time is sometimes for your safety. 122. Sometimes I wish I could get a refund on the time I have invested on people that weren’t worth it. 123. I wish more people were fluent in silence. 124. Deja Poo. The feeling that you’ve heard this crap before. 125. I’m a lady, but when I’m mad, I am an evil sadistic demon spawned b..ch from hell that will make you regret the day you were born. And when I’m happy, I like to bake cookies and shit. 126. I’m an odd combination of “really sweet” and “don’t mess with me.” 127. I am in one of those moods where I just want to throw a book at someone’s face and be like: I facebooked you. 128. Controlling my tongue is no problem. It’s my face that needs deliverance. 129. Trying to understand some people is like trying to pick up a turd by the clean end 130. Hmmm, I’m going to file your opinions right here between “f..ck this” and “f..ck that”. 131. I’m not petty, I’m dead ass disrespectful and I will straight up disrespect you if you want to play that petty game. Your feelings will be hurt. 132. Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or won’t text me back. 133. Some people are a human version of a migraine. 134. Grammar. The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit. 135. If only closed minds came with closed mouths. 136. People think I’m shy because I don’t get involved in their conversations. The truth is, I don’t give a f..ck what they’re talking about. 137. I hate it when I think I’m buying organic vegetables but when I get home, I discover they’re just regular donuts. 138. It’s a beautiful day to leave me alone. 139. Congratulations! You’ve managed to make me feel like a worthless piece of shit again. Would you like an award for that? 140. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. I really thought you already knew.

141. Life is a soup and I’m a freaking fork. 142. Some people are just treasures that you just want to bury them. 143. Sweetie, I’m going to need you to put those few remaining brain cells together and work with me here, Okay? 144. In order to insult me, I must value your opinion. Nice try though. 145. I’ve got heels higher than your standards. 146. If you don’t like and still watch everything I do, b..tch you are a fan. 147. I may look calm but in my mind, I’ve killed you three times. 148. Oh sure, you’re smart. Sesame Street smart. 149. Don’t worry about what I’m doing. Worry about why you’re worried about what I’m doing. 150. I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea. 151. Oh, my bad. I’m sorry for bothering you. I forgot I only exist when you need me for something. 152. If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a stupid question. 153. Shhhhhhhhhhhhh. No one cares. 154. Oh, you hate me? Join the club! There are weekly meetings at the corner of F..ck You St. and Kiss My Ass Blvd. 155. I’m 97% sure you don’t like me but I’m 100% sure I don’t care. 156. Your flexibility amazes me. How do you get your food in your mouth and your head up your ass all at the same time? 157. I don’t have a bad temper. I just have a quick reaction to bullshit. 158. Listen, I’m a nice person. So if I’m a b..ch to you, you need to ask yourself why. 159. Good morning world! Your little ray of sarcastic sunshine has arrived! 160. People say I act like I don’t care. It’s not an act.

161. I try not to laugh at my own jokes but we all know I’m hilarious. 162. You are the result of 4 billion years of evolution. So act like it. 163. I’m sorry, I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions. 164. I am the friend you have to explain to your other friends before they meet me. 165. It’s nearly time for my Psychotic Break. 166. I know I don’t have to be sarcastic, but the world has given me so much material to work with. I would hate to be wasteful. 167. Here’s a tissue, you have a little bullshit on your lip. 168. Only dead fish go with the flow. 169. Some people will only like you if you fit inside their box. Don’t be afraid to shove that box up their ass. 170. If I say “First of all”. Run away because I have prepared research, data, and charts and will destroy you. 171. In my defense, I was left unsupervised. 172. I am a nice person. Just don’t push the b..ch button. 173. The B..ch Slap. Keeping a..holes in line since 1836. 174. Warning. I’m bored. Things could get dangerous. 175. I am currently experiencing life at the speed of 15 wtf’s per hour. 176. Interviewer: What do you make at your current job? Me: Mostly mistakes and inappropriate comments. 177. I’m confident my last words will be, “Are you fu…ng kidding me?” 178. I’ve come to a point in my life where I need a stronger word than f..ck. 179. We all have problems. Some of us just choose not to post them on Facebook. 180. In all honesty, things would’ve never worked between us. I’m a unicorn, you’re a donkey; I’m majestic, and you my love are just an ass.

181. It must be hard putting makeup on your two faces every day. 182. Nothing brings a group of a…holes together faster than something that’s none of their business. 183. Don’t be an a..hole to me, cause then I have to be an a..hole to you. And I’m way better at being an a..hole than you are. 184. My decision-making skills closely resemble that of a squirrel when crossing the street. 185. Some people are like Slinky’s. Pretty much useless but make you smile when you push them down the stairs. 186. I would like to confirm that I do not care. 187. Of course, I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice. 188. Breaking someone’s trust is like crumpling up a perfect piece of paper. You can smooth it over but it’s never going to be the same again. 189. Please cancel my subscription to your issues. 190. Be the reason someone smiles today. Or the reason they drink. Whatever works. 191. Patience. What you have when there are too many witnesses. 192. Good judgment comes from experience. And experience? Well, that comes from poor judgment. 193. I don’t know how to accept compliments. So thanks, suck a d..ck or whatever. 194. I need a cocktail. Hold the tail. 195. I’ve met some pricks in my time, but you my friend, are the f..cking cactus. 196. I don’t always tolerate stupid people. But when I do, I’m probably at work. 197. Quick Tip: Mind your own motherf…ng goddamn business b..ch. 198. My loyalty cannot be bought. However, it can be rented. 199. I’m definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it. 200. Mom: What did you learn in school today sweetheart? Me: Obviously not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.

In every sarcastic remark we hear, there is always some truth behind it. It’s easier to express our feelings to other people by being sarcastic. It makes the person laugh a little and accept the advice you say without them feeling offended. But being sarcastic can be a little harsh as well. We find ourselves using sarcastic quotes or remarks usually when we deal with our friends and family members. We use it as a way of dealing with issues in relationships, in decision making, and in life in general. If you want to know why sarcasm has now become a meaningful way to express one’s feelings, you have to familiarize yourself with them.